WHOA That's Good Podcast - I’m Too Anxious to Post Consistently — And That’s Okay | Sadie, Christian, Bella & John Luke

Episode Date: December 10, 2025

Sadie Robertson Huff, Christian Huff, Bella Robertson Mayo, and John Luke Robertson are back for their (now) annual tradition of recapping the year’s podcasts and sharing the standout advice that seriously stuck with them. From Preston Perry’s take on how to figure out if someone’s “your person,” to Phil Wickham’s mentor-inspired questions that helped him when he wasn’t quite sure about popping the big question to his then-girlfriend — they’re diving into all of it. They also revisit John Crist’s reminder not to post just to please the algorithm and Lacy Abercrombie’s encouragement to log off apps — or even the entire internet — when your brain needs a breather. This Episode of WHOA That's Good is Sponsored By: AG1 has their best offer ever - subscribe with my link https://drinkag1.com/whoa and you’ll unlock 7 free gifts worth $126 https://drinklmnt.com/whoa — Get a free LMNT Sample Pack with any purchase! https://liberty.edu/Sadie — Get your application fee WAIVED when you start your future with Liberty University today! - Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Book a visit now at 905-947-9990 or at amica.ca.ca.ca.com slash Unionville. What's up, everybody, happy Whoa That's Good Wednesday. This is our recap episode for all the incredible advice we've gotten all year long. I think we've done this kind of year recap, I mean, at least for the past couple years. And I think you guys were my guests in the past on it too. And it just keeps working so well. And it's one of my favorite things to do to get to be in the studio with John Luke and Bella and Christian.

Am I still considered a guest or am I like considered a co-host? No. Oh. Well, you said guests and you didn't include me in the guest. But co-host is like really far. Well, he'd be acting like a co-hosts showing up late today, walking in and roasting you, Bella. And then Bella hit him with your... Don't act like you all ready to go when I walked in.

You don't have to say that on the podcast. You don't have to express me on the podcast. our real life. People need to know that you just called your brother-in-law a butthole before we said this guy. He was acting like one. I was not. I was being sarcastic and it came across to you as being a beehole. Okay. Not the bee. I love your, how you spelled things out sometimes. It is very funny. Thank you. Okay. Without further ado, we should probably hop on in because there's so much good advice that we've gotten this year.

I always love this too because I don't think you'll listen to my podcast. I do. I listen to the one with family. I always listen to the ones with family. That's actually sweet because you would think you would listen to the ones with not family since you hear us talk all the time. No, I like to listen to the ones family. I like to hear you'll say about me like last week's.

Same. I do talk about you. I like to, yeah, I like the ones with family. So you only listen to the podcast to hear what people say about you? No, but I was just saying. saying that because the last one I listened to, they happened to bring me up a lot of times. I did. The last one you listened to, though, for reference, because it won't be at the same time when this comes out, was Will and Abby's. No, no, no. It was Mary Kate and Abby. Oh, Mary Kate and Abby.

And I kept talking about how Bella and Jacob went stargazing on their first date, which apparently they did not, but it was what y'all planned to do. But it was what he asked me to do. And then we never did. We went on a picnic. Because y'all were just making out the whole time. Christian coming for me today I'm just kidding wait okay this is not

have to do with this podcast but Jellie what was you Ameri Kate's first date like first real date for those just listening to the audio version I just cut my eyes I'll narrate

facial expressions no this is just me wasting time while I think of what the answer was and I can't think of it. You've been married for 10 years. I know, 10 years. No, we did, we were on that trip.

What we consider our first date was when we were on that trip to you were there and we went. I think that was when y'all established our dating. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. The It's of March.

Yes. It was March 15. Yeah, that's when we started dating on the IDIs of March. Yeah. But we call it the Idies. The ites. The itys. And we do celebrate

the iddies every year. The, um, Our first day, I actually think we went to Waffle House, I think, was our legitimate first day. That would not surprise me. We went to Waffle House. We'll have to ask Mary Kate. Next time she's in the podcast, you should ask her. You know what's crazy to me? Like, now I think about my health, but in high school, I would go to Waffle House so often in the mornings and get a chocolate chip waffle with a Coke.

If I did that now, I would feel so sick after that. You got a Waffle House before school? Yeah. On Tuesday's game days. on a game day, I would start my day off with chocolate chival and a Coke. I'm like, just thinking about, because now I think like, okay, if I want to play good, I would eat something good and healthy for me to feel strong. Back then, I was like, I need chocolate chowice waffle and a Coke right now.

And it was the best thing ever. And maybe we should do that on a Tuesday. We should. That's why you played so good. Maybe that's good advice. Okay, but for real, let's get to actual good advice for this year. All right. episode one of last year, January 8, Preston Perry was on the podcast. Talk about a strong

start. Very strong story. And I love what he said. If God gave me a spouse that met my every condition, I would never learn how to love unconditionally. Why are you laughing? Sorry. Sorry. My phone buzzed and Bella laughed at me. No, I just looked at you because this is my first time on the podcast. Silence yourself an amateur. Okay. Sorry. Okay, well, that was really good advice. And one thing about Preston and Jackie, because they were on a couple times this year, they are so well-spoken. It's wild.

I think because they both are poets and also she does rap. Like, they are so good with just their everyday conversations. Like, he just throws that out there. Like, it's nothing and it's so beautiful and it's so good. Bella, from a poet, because you're a poet, do you sometimes feel like you want to talk like that? Like what? Like, you know, like this is what you said.

Meet my every condition I would never learn how to love unconditionally. Yeah, yeah. And that's beautiful. Yeah. Do you ever talk like that just for fun? No. But I feel like for them, they talk for a living and like they think through these things all the time. So like I feel like if maybe I would.

is doing that more than maybe I would think like that more, but that's true. So translation, what he means is, God did not give me a robot. I think we need to reset our tone because we're being too giggly right now. No, I'm being serious. That's what he's implying of like someone that gave you everything you wanted, which is what a robot would do. You press a button and it happens. Then yes, you would never learn how to love unconditionally. I think that's really good advice, not what Christian said, but what he said.

I think it's really good advice. I really do. I think that's beautiful. That's so true. And obviously, like, we've all been married. I've been married for four years, y'all five or six? Almost six. And you for 10, I feel like you learn so much about yourself and you grow so much being married.

And everyone says, like, marriage is mirror and, like, you learn so much. And it's so true. I feel like you really grow a lot in your ability to love unconditionally because of that exact reason. so I think that's so true. It's true. And it's really cool. We were talking about this yesterday, how, like, the beautiful thing about relationship that you cannot get anywhere else like a robot, like, you know, people are starting relationships with AI now, and it's so sad and it's so weird. But it's like the beauty of relationship and what makes it so, like, love be real and vulnerability means so much, intimacy, all that, is that you really know that

person, and you've overcome things with that person. And it's, it's a lot of, and it's, like that cannot be traded for anything that this world can give you temporarily, like to really know someone and love someone and forgive someone and walk through life with someone is just like so special. And I think people are afraid of the bumps in the road. People are afraid of the hard things. But it truly is like those hard things that make you get to experience love in a way on this side of heaven that is so holy. Yeah, I think the lot of people believe is that if you did have a spouse that met your every condition, you'd be happier. and short term, that could maybe be true, but long term, yeah, it's the highs and the lows that

you come out of hard things and you have those deeper moments that, yeah, I do think you experience a deeper love when you go through hard things, when you don't see eye to eye, you actually have to work through real problems as humans. I think, too, like, it's important to, like, flip that whole thing because it's like, as much as, yes, we learn to love unconditionally, you also, are loved unconditionally, which is like, I feel like what makes it so worth it because not only are you loving someone through maybe like them not being perfect, you're also being loved the same way, which is the best gifts you can be given.

There's the poet side of you. Yeah, thinking about the idea of unconditional love, it's really, I really understand now, after being married 10 years, why our promise is till death throughout us part, because if there's any kind of condition, you're going to fail in it. And whoever you're marrying is going to change. Like, Mary and I've been married 10 years, I'm not the same person I was at 20. She's not the same person. She was at 20.

We've changed the last 10 years, and we've had to fall in love with each other over and over again while we go through things and make mistakes and experiencing things and having points of weakness and points of strength, all of those experiences have changed us as people. And that commitment to love and the marriage has to be able to encompass all of those changes that you have as a person. Yeah, it's so true. We were, the reason we were talking about this yesterday is because we're coming out of another postpartum, I guess I still am. It's only been three months, just crazy. But it's like, you know, through nine months of pregnancy and then your postpartum. And then, like, we finally find, like, your stride again. There's like, oh,

pregnant again, and then postpartum. And then finally like, okay, and then pregnant again and postpartum. And it's like, that's a lot of change in like your hormones and your life and your lifestyle and now adding kids to the mix and your body and your all of the different things. And so those are certainly like conditions that go up and down. But like to be loved unconditionally in those seasons and like learn how to serve each other, learn how to love each other, love learn how to be intentional, learn how to be selfless. Truly, you do come out of those on the other side of it and just like, oh, I love you so much more. And even though those are hard things sometimes and uncomfortable things, like we wouldn't want to go back to our marriage before kids because it's so much stronger now, even though it's different, you know?

And so, yeah, I think that's a beautiful thing that he said. And definitely good point for us still. Definitely good advice. Definitely good advice. Whoa, that is so good. Fam, I don't know about y'all, but this time of year can feel like a marathon. We are all juggling Christmas party, shopping, holiday travel, and trying to keep everybody healthy. And in the middle of that, we're all just trying to do little things that make us feel better every day.

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is a game changer for your nightly routine. That's drinkag1.com slash woe for $126 in free gifts for new subscribers. I'm going to skip a little bit because since we're kind of on the relationship train, and we had Phil Wickham and Christian Stanfield, which was so fun, they were in town. They were doing a little concert, not a little concert, is actually a pretty big one, at a local church. And I love this. He said, questions of mentor asked him when he was feeling a fear of commitment with his now wife when they were dating.

And the reason we talked about this too and why I want to bring it up is because so many people are like overthinking, is this person the one, even when it's kind of clear, like, they are the one. And our generation certainly struggles with commitment issues, like thinking maybe there's a better option out there, not wanting to commit, because again, fear of all the hard things. But these were the questions that he asked himself, does she love Jesus? Does she make you love Jesus more? Do you think she's pretty? Do you want to hang out with her every day?

Do you trust her to raise your kids? Asking these questions is how he realized he was supposed to marry his wife. and so I think that's good. That was like such good advice. Like don't overthink it. Just ask yourself the basic questions and then go, okay, is it a yes on these things that are really important that I'm ready to commit. And back to what we just talked about, committing is not saying, okay, it's going to be great. It's going to be perfect. It's going to be easy. Committing is saying, no matter what, this is who I choose to do life with. I love that book. Minghling of Souls and Matt Chandler says it's not a question of like, will I argue with someone in marriage? Who do I want to argue with for the rest of? in my life. And he was like, and I choose Lauren to do that with. Yeah, you're going to argue with somebody. Do I want to be this person or someone else? And I don't love arguing, but I'm happy to argue with you. That's so kind. What do you all think about that? Are y'all overthinkers when it comes to commitment decisions? Um, I would say I'm not. I think that, um, which I don't want to skip ahead, but there's advice on there that I really resonated with about, um, like hearing

from God, being able to discern God's voice from Pete Richardson, and I'm sure we'll talk about that in a minute. Bring it up. Let's talk about it. You have it actually written out so you can read it if you want to. That was actually the next one. It says, are you talking about, well, kind of both of his are good. I'll read both. He said, it is a jungle out there, but if you learn to discern the voice of your father, God, you will be able to navigate anything in that jungle. I love that. Then he said, he was faced with a big decision. He called his dad and asked for advice, and his dad said, go on a 30 minute walk and ask God what he wants you to do. That gave him the gift of inquiring of God and discerning the voice of God. That's so good. I feel like that's something I've learned a lot.

And also just like, I don't know if it's, I feel like me and you both were this way, but it was kind of that like when you know you know situation. And I always feel like when people ask me, like, how do you know he's the one? I'm like, I don't know. I just felt confident. And I also felt like God gave me a peace about it. And I feel like that's something I've learned a lot. especially in the past year, but really just all through this whole journey is just like learning to listen to God. And like even if it doesn't say in the Bible, make this decision, God will tell that to you. And like you'll feel peace about it. You'll feel confident and things like that.

So I feel like that, I don't know, that's how I would answer it, I guess. It's just like knowing when you know, you know, really is, I feel like a commercial thing people say a lot. um as a christian i think god will give you that peace and you'll know you know i love that it was so good yeah i think it's it's not overthinking it i i think it's important to think about your relationship and who you're going to spend the rest of your life with and even down to who you're going to be friends with you know i got married at 19 so it was a little different circumstance for me but i've seen a lot of relationships over the years um people i know who've become couples or even people who've become friends and people I've been friends with. And those

questions, I think, are spot on on what you should be focusing on. I think one of that, the keys is friendship. You're going to hang out with them every day. You know, everyone's got problems. Everyone's got, you know, different things. And it does kind of come down to like, is this something I can overlook in the beginning stages? So then later on, you can forgive them, move on. In friendships, I even think about, but I want to say, I think that to really get to know somebody, it's not overthinking it, but I think people should think about it over a longer period of time. Yeah. You know, like it takes months, years maybe sometimes to really get to know somebody. And that's not like scare you off, but that's a just, you have to understand that that's part of the process.

You know, at Camp Chioca, when I'm hiring staff, we hire 60 staff members a year. I've hired hundreds, probably thousands, over 1,000 staff members in the past 10 years. And I've interviewed thousands. And usually in the first five minutes, I know if they're going to be a good counselor or not. But a lot of times I'm super surprised. some people I think oh they're going to be great a couple months later they get to camp and they end up

surprising me a bad way sometimes someone who I was like oh they kind of sound weaker in the interview they ended up being awesome you know so like once you get past that first like date or that first like meeting you're like okay I enjoyed this time

then you have to understand that it might take months to really understand kind of get their character that's good that just made me think of one thing that I wrote on like my list of, you know, who I want my husband to be one day, I guess. So it's just kind of funny that I had a list. But I feel like a lot of girls do have a list.

But whenever I got, like, more specific on my list, one of the things I wrote was I want him to wait to tell me he loves me until he really knows me. Because I feel like in younger relationships, you like would rush into like those big words, those big things. I was like, you'd have no idea that you don't even know me yet, you know? And I feel like when you throw out those words too fast or you throw out, um, you know, I don't know, you just get too close too fast. Sometimes you do miss that really important part of a relationship, just truly getting to know someone. And I feel like over time, again,

like that can take months for some people, that can take years for some people. But it is really important in asking yourself, like, who am I going to marry? Again, that's not overthinking it. That's just using wisdom and discernment and getting to know someone. Because one thing you do have to think about when you're marrying someone is this is not just someone. that you like going on a date with. This is someone that's going to be like the father to your children, you know, your y'all's, you know, uncle to y'all's children, you know, your siblings' kids. They're going to be on all your family vacations on, you know, y'all are going to go through

the hard things together. When you say like in sickness and health, going through sickness is hard and having a spouse who loves you through that, the conditions of marriage. So it's not, it's not something to underthink. It's just something to use wisdom on it. But then it's also not something to overthink. Or when it's clear, it's clear. It's never going to be perfect.

You are not ever going to be perfect. So hopefully they're not waiting on you to arrive to being perfect. And they're not either. So you do have to make a decision and be willing to commit. But it's important to think about those things. Yeah. Yeah, I think. Wait, we all three just sort of talking.

This is a good conversation. There you go. Okay. I was just going to say that I think that there are some like universal qualities that everyone should look for in a spouse and I think there's some qualities that are important to some people and like prioritized by others and I think that that's something to think about too like what do you want and I was actually thinking about this while you were talking but I was wondering and I can ask you later but I was wondering like what qualities you look for when you're

hiring for someone like what are those things when you meet someone the first five minutes that you're like that's a person that I want to hire and maybe someone that's not and I was thinking about that because I think for me when I hire people here I look at for like I like confidence and like when someone comes in really confident like I'm quicker to hire them and I've been wrong sometimes because sometimes that confidence is more pride and sometimes people come in more quiet and I'm like oh they don't seem very confident and then they're great they're great people to work with because they're really focused and not as being like loud or prideful and so I think that there's some things that some people look for and not to bring up like

workplace but like in spouses too i think that there are some things that you just prioritize and are important to you and i think you should think about that too like what what am i looking for in a person and especially i feel like in a big family like i grew up the youngest of or the second youngest of a big family and i feel like a lot of times um when i was young i was looking for like oh i don't know well like this is just like oh sadie you know normally i don't know you know i just saw you and who you dated and everything and like it's just hard to like figure out what I wanted and things like that and that even comes down to like even just like wedding styles and stuff like that like you just see what your older siblings do or whatever and you're more likely to do that but I think

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slash woe try element totally risk free. If you don't like it, they'll refund your order. No questions asked. That's drink element, D-R-I-N-K-L-M-N-T dot com slash woe. In your future. I feel like, I feel like I didn't know what I wanted necessarily. Like when I say a list of things. Some people are like, this type of person, this style, I did not know. And I dated a lot of different types of people. And I wish that, this sounds bad, but I wish that we could more casually date in some sense. Yes, we want to date with the intention of getting married. So I don't mean be flippant and not wise, but it's like, you have to get to know people to know what you want and know what you do like in a person. And I didn't like know it was going

to be like Christian's type of person. But as I started to get to know Christian, I'm like, oh, He's, like, exactly, like, who I want to marry. Like, this is my guy, you know. And I don't even think I would have known to write those things down. But when I just saw the qualities in him, I was like, this is the kind of person I want to spend my life with. And on that note, too, of, like, asking other people for advice and wisdom, I was thinking about, for me hiring people, I was, like, not great at that because I'm, like, you know, want to be everybody's friend. And I'm like, oh, they're so great. They're, like, super fun to be around, hired.

but then like they actually weren't good at that specific job so now I actually remove myself from that side of our business so someone else can do that because they are a little bit better at not just getting distracted by like oh I like you as a person but you're going to be good for the job and so that's actually a good point when it comes to dating someone like maybe you know my discernment isn't great like maybe in the past of dated people that weren't great so I'm going to ask my friends around me like what do you think about this person and that's one of the reasons why Christian and I's first date was with my friends around because I wanted to make sure like I'm not the only one who thinks this is a good decision you know and so I think you got to know yourself in that where you get a that's good were you going to say something to you are you guys first I was just going to do a long circle back to where we started with the question um and just just to add a simple are you going to say something well yeah let me get let me go up Bella first and then you can get your yeah sorry I totally went a different direction well no I think bell you're right on that that there are some things that are the same for your workplace or your friends as for your person you want to

date some things I look for when I'm hiring counselor like the first few things is like are they humble like I don't want I want somebody who's confident but I don't want them bragging are they I'll ask questions about their friends like do they have friends if I they don't have any friends like probably don't want to hang around them ask how their relationship is with their parents and like it's not you know not everyone has great parents but if they can kind of talk about that if they have good relationship with their family that's a good sign that they're someone who you know you'd like to hang out with um ask about their character like how they're doing in school i want to know are they ambitious like they don't have to have their life planned out but i don't want someone who's

just like uh whatever i don't know you know who's not doing well in anything um usually i ask if they have like a hobby or something. It's like, can they follow through with something? Can they commit to create something, you know? Well, and this is good. And so many of those questions are actually very in line with who you want to marry. Right. But the thing is, when you're asking a camp counselor this, what you're thinking is not like, oh, I want someone fun to be at camp is also who's going to lead these kids? Exactly. Because camp is such a pivotal time in people's life. And the camp counselor is speaking into their kids, those kids and like can have a huge. huge impression on their life. And so you're not just looking for someone to date. You are looking

for someone to marry, you know, that kind of concept. Well, that's the other thing with a camp counselor, similar to someone who you want to date. I'm also thinking, are they going to pair well with everyone else at the camp? Do they fit in? Are they going to fit in with everyone? And I want to hire a diverse staff and I do. But I have to know they get along. And if I'm looking for someone to date, I'm like, are they going to get along with my siblings? Are they going to get along with my friends like do they fit into this kind of like culture um the other thing specifically about dating that i like to i tell people i've thought about a lot is you want to see someone in in every emotional situation so like that kind of goes along with the questions of like friendship like

how do they react when they're angry how do they react when they're sad how do they react when they're happy are they good winners are they good losers do they lose their temper you know like if you kind of go through are they disgusted by things like if you kind of see them in all see all those emotions yeah you can kind of get a sense of like they can control themselves or oh they need to they have a temper you know and that's a good way to kind of that's like a checklist that you can go through while you're trying to decide like am i want to commit further with this person it's good I love that it's really go no no no no no speak to that and then I'm going to start about to the questions we're going to move on no no this

This isn't even that important. You just go. No, I just was going to say, I think those are great. That to where we started with the list of questions that Phil's, was it his pastor or counselor? Yeah, his mentor. He's a mentor. Yeah, I think those questions are really good because I think a lot of times people that have miserable dating experiences that are like miserable in dating think that marriage will fix those problems. And I think you have to ask these kind of questions and be truthful to it because marriage will not solve your problems if you are not.

not happy with the person you're dating and if you just magically think that getting married will solve those things then that is not true. I love this question because I think it kind of negates that idea of like, well, we're not happy, but I think we will be happy if we get married. So that's good. That's all I was going to say. I love that. I was going to say, I was just thinking about during Joel Link was talking, I was thinking about just all the things that you can relate to like, especially when you're hiring someone and when you're looking for someone to date and like one thing I always notice. And this is just like, like a red flag for relationships, and I see it in the workplace, but when I'm hiring someone,

if they're the whole hiring process, they're complaining about their old job, talking negatively about every job they ever had, their bosses and their coworkers and yada yada, and the 30 minutes I sit down with them for an interview. It's the same for dating. If you sit down with a guy and the first thing they do is just complain about their ex-girlfriends and how terrible they were and talk so negatively about them, you're going to be the next one that they're talking about like that. Yeah. So that's something that I just like always see as a red flag in the workplace and I think

is so important also for dating. Like if someone's looking at everything in a negative view and talking about people badly and like they're going to be talking about you next, so just like keep an eye out for that. I've had that happen where I've gone like, why am I so surprised? because they told me that they did this in so many other scenarios. I just didn't think it was going to happen to me. But it's like you do need to look for those patterns. This is so good.

Very good advice, everyone. The next one I want to go to is John Chris's episode, which I have to say, Bella, it was fun that you said that you only listen to a family because our family episodes were the top podcast of the year when it comes to how many listens and whatnot and engagement. but the person who snuck in with the family was John Chris. John Chris's episode was, I think, like, the third biggest podcast of the year. And for good reason.

If you didn't listen to that, I highly encouraged to go back and listen. He's so funny, but he also was so vulnerable about overcoming addiction and moving on in life. But I loved his original piece of advice. He said, the closer you can be to yourself when making jokes in his case scenario, if I can get into the energy of is this, oh, sorry, he said, if I get into the energy, of is this going to go on the algorithm or is this going to be funny to them then i'm done and i love that he's basically saying like if i get into the headspace of like i'm only doing this so that the algorithm will you know like this or i'm only doing this so that people will think i'm funny then i'm

done like i got to stay in the zone of i think it's funny this is who i am this is what i'm putting out there and i have like thought about that a lot in in my life and like the longevity of doing social media. There's so much pressure to like, okay, this is the trend. This is what the algorithm likes. And what you don't realize is if you start feeding that, you'll start to change who you are. And then all of a sudden you look up and you're like, oh, who I've just portrayed myself to be to the world. It's actually starting to get far away from who I am. And then you have to keep up with an image you created of yourself. And so it's like, no, I'm not going to do this for the algorithm. I'm not going to do this for the likes or for them to like, I'm going to do it because it's the overflow of who I

am and had such a good space to be and that doesn't just go for social media certainly you see it on social media but that's in anything in your life you know um but i thought that was such good advice it was really good yeah i see a lot of people on social media that you can tell that they post things because they think it's going to hit on the algorithm and it's yeah those people really frustrate me i think not naming any names but i think too the people the reason you're followed and the reason you get attraction is because people like you. And so the longer you stay you, the more you'll see success. And I think me and mom have talked about that before when Duck Dynasty happened. Like she could have moved us to L.A.

and just like done away with West Monroe and not even did Duck Commander and just moved us to L.A. and pursued whatever there is there. But that wouldn't be us anymore. That's the whole reason people love us is because we're from Louisiana. Like this is our life and that's the reason And we, you know, and I think that happens a lot with influencers, not to shade any influencers, but I think that with influencers a lot of times they may get famous because they post about their nursing job or their, whatever job they do, they may get famous for that. And then they quit their job and they do influencing. But then that's who you were and that's why people love you, not because of your job,

but people love seeing what you do. And then when you change that for social media, you're not who you are anymore, you know. It's the same thing with like aesthetics to me. me, like, if you go to, and I'm not, this is not necessarily, like, a bad thing. This is just a look. But, like, if you go to Nashville, there is a look everybody has. It's, like, long hair, the fake eyelashes, a lot of Botogs, perfect skin. That's the look. If you go to, like, the University of Alabama, you're going to see spray tans, and you're going to see everybody's tan, everybody's wearing Lulu Lemon, everybody's, you know, wearing daily drills. If you go to Malibu, everybody's wearing, like, the shirt that's, like, not quite to their jeans. showing like a little mint and like, you know, cool white pants.

Like I woke up like this vibe, skin care perfect. But it's like we don't realize that in doing that, we all start to look the same, you know? And it's like that is like a look, but God gave you a look that's unique that no one else has that is actually like a gift to the world. Like we are made in the image of God. We get to see new sides of who God is by us expressing what God put in us. And so not that that's bad. I do it too. I follow the terms of where I just got my eyebrows laminated because I like the way it looks. I was noticing that while you were talking. I was like, really good. Thank you. So it's not bad. You're not doing anything wrong to appreciate a look and go for it. But I do think if you're not careful and staying true to who you are and you're just doing it because you want to follow everybody else, then you look up and there's like not a lot of uniqueness. There's not a lot of originality. And I think that that is sad because it's really cool to see. people like owning who they are, owning what they look like, owning. Like Lauren Daigle is a good

example of just like true living original. Like Lauren wears outfits that I'm like, how did you even think to put that together? But she looks beautiful and she's so cool and people appreciate her so much because she's like so authentically living who she is. And I don't need to try to copy her outfit because I like it. That would look ridiculous on me because that's not who I am. And people would be like, what are you doing? You know, but I'm inspired by her authenticity. in that. And it makes me want to be more like me, you know, not more like her. I know a lot of you out there have been praying for clarity about your future. That's a huge question we get asked. How do you know what to do next? Maybe it's stepping into a new season,

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atedu slash sadie today I was thinking my head what you're talking like what is our look what is Louisiana what do we wear yeah I don't really know because I feel like all of us have such different style in some sense I don't know that it's like a look here

I don't know maybe other people could speak into that yeah comment below maybe y'all should comment below what our look is because I don't know if you can see like I don't know people in Nashville are thinking like oh we all kind of have like a look, you know? And maybe I realize it now, because I'll, like, wear stuff that I used to wear when I live there. They're like, I'm like, this isn't really fit me, but it totally did when I was

there. But it doesn't fit me here. And it fit me there because everybody else is wearing that. This is just kind of funny. That's like that, like one time I had that happen to me was like a backhanded compliment at school. I was at school freshman year and a substitute teacher told me after class, she was like, I just want to tell you, don't ever change wearing your outfits different than everyone else and like doing your own thing and having your own style like you may not look like everyone else and like people may say stuff but don't ever change and I was like I never thought about that until now and I was like okay girl I know people have said that to me too they're like they've said kind of what I said about Lauren like I would

never wear that but it looks really cute on you and you're like is it weird because I didn't actually think it was weird yeah the giant Christmas episode was probably one of my favorite I listened to it out the door and I thought when he was talking about that and talking about being a creative and kind of putting yourself out there I feel that a lot and I think that

a lot of that comes down to comparison is you want to hit for any, this goes for any job but especially for creatives is you want to hit when you start looking at the numbers and stop looking at the art or your competency in whatever you're doing

doing that's when you start to like lose yourself like yeah for it's totally if you like doing trends and you're good at it do it like that's great if you're good at that aspect of whatever it is or if you can put that look together like there's a reason that those things are well and do well but when you start to see your art as a job that's i think when you start to like lose yourself and that's like sometimes you have to sometimes you have to do that like sometimes you you want to make something that you're like, oh, I know this is going to go viral or, oh, I know people are going to really like this. And sometimes you just do that to get a confidence boost. But if you put your personality in that and it doesn't do well, then you start to, you start to lose

yourself. Yeah. I think that's the thing for me because you see, I mean, I don't think there's really necessarily wrong with, yeah, like you said, whether it's something trendy or you're like, I actually do think this will perform well. I don't think that's necessarily always a bad thing. but my point is when you do do something like when you when you post this and then that works and then you only become that thing it's like so niche yeah so it's like the thing that you know works yeah it's like for instance like if i'm a preacher and i could post all my different preaching content but if the one thing that works is me having all the hot takes that i'm screaming so then i'm only going to post screaming hot takes because i know that those get a ton of views

then you just become that person rather than all the other things that encompasses your messages, you just become known as that one thing because you know it works because people, it can sometimes be controversial or people can share it

or people can discuss it. And to me, that's when it becomes damaging to where you limit yourself to this one thing because you know, this is what works. And yeah,

I don't think it's always bad to, oh, this is a fun, trendy thing, I'll do it. I mean, I've done that plenty of times throughout that. I think this will work. but if you become that one thing just because it worked and somehow it does keep working

because you figured out the algorithm, then I think that's when it becomes dangerous. Yeah, then you tend to only share that one side of you because you don't want people to not like you or like you start to delete the things that aren't performing well or start to only act in that one space. As I've said this before, but I know if I walk through the airport,

dressed like I am today, I'm going to get stopped and recognized and take pictures of people. If I walk through the airport in my pajamas, or casual clothes and Christian has seen this when no makeup on nobody even like notices me it's kind of nice and funny

but if I was like I always have to be put together because that's the version people notice me and that's the version people like that would be so much pressure on myself to always be ready and it's not healthy

and I have to be okay with going okay I might not get a compliment today I might not get recognized today but I'm confident enough in who I am with no makeup on and sweats and whatever because my look doesn't find me. You know, my look, it might look better to people, but that's not like where I find

my confidence in who I am. And so I think that's what you have to check with yourself. Live original. This all boils down to one message. Live original. And that I said, on this note, on this note, Lacey Abercombe hit us with the best fees of advice, log off the internet. Has there ever been a time in y'all's life where you had to log off the internet? So to see me in like, delete something or like unplug a computer? Like... How do you take it, babe? Well, log off technically would mean just shut it down.

Have you ever shut it all down? Shut it all down? No. Have I shut some down? Yes. How did that go for you? It was good. It was a good time of my life.

You've deleted Instagram a few times. A few times. You've completely cut out Snapchat. Completely cut out Snapchat. But I wouldn't say I logged off the internet. so the internet is she just meaning safari i'm i'm acting like too papa is okay sorry um have i logged off the internet regarding snapchat yes snapchat's the wote uh instagramgram yes those have been healthy times for me when kind of like what we just talked about if i get in my head on yeah like why is

that not performing well or thinking about things too much and feeling feeling like i'm just spending too much time on it and I want to fill that with something else. Yes, I think it's great. It's had app time limits and stuff like that. But sometimes it's easy just to click that, you know, extra 15 minutes. But in that code, keep on scrolling. Sometimes you need to delete it. So, we have friends, so that this is really cool.

So we have friends, married couple, and they have screen time on their apps. And they, like, they know each other's password. Like, the other person doesn't know their pastor. So, like, if. I was about to bring that up. Yeah, so, like, it's Freddie and Parker. I just go and say it live. You guys know Freddie.

If Freddie wants more screen time, she has to ask Parker for the past going to add 50 minutes. I think that's great accountability. Yeah, we should probably. I don't want to do that, but it's good accountability. When you're ready to log out the internet, let me know and we'll do that. I do log off the internet a lot of times. I think that's really good, though. What about y'all?

Well, everybody knows. I have a complicated relationship with social media, so yes, I have. But I think that for me, it's more about the posting side. of things like I don't even have to delete the app because it's not about looking on social media it's about the mental block I have about posting on social media I have a lot of just I don't know there's a lot of pressure that I feel about posting on social media and I just don't like to do it it's just like about two years ago I was like I just can't feel this pressure anymore and so I stopped posting as regularly and I post every now and then but it's just not something that

I do every day anymore because I just have a lot of anxiety around it. Sometimes you put in some great things on your story and I'm like, this is a main page thing. And I think that's really real to share people like, you have anxiety around it. I think a lot of people probably feel that way with social media because the algorithm does put pressure on you. Like we can say all day long, like don't let the algorithm, but like it does put pressure on you because it's like if you don't post all the time, then you're not going to, it's not going to get shared, whatever. And I always try to tell Christian this, like when we talk about this, because he was starting to, like, really work on his social media this year is like, is like, you're noticing your light count, no one else is. You're noticing what performs better and no one else is.

No one's saying, oh, man, that did not perform well for her. And if you are, that's rude and unnecessary. But, like, I never think that when I see somebody else's post. And it might not be that for you, but I do think a lot of people fill that. okay friends let's talk about kitchen stuff for a second you know we are all trying to cook healthier for our families out here but then you find out that your old non-stick pants are loaded with tons of chemicals are you kidding me no thanks that's why i'm obsessed with our place their cookware is totally toxin-free but still crazy high quality which i love because dinner at our house usually

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difference when it comes to cooking, any kind of meat in a pan like that. Our Place is having their biggest sale of the year right now. And you can save it to 35% site wide now through January 12. Head to from our place.com slash wo to see why more than a million people have made the switch to R place kitchenware. And with their 100-day risk-free trial-free shipping and free returns, you can shop with total confidence, shop the R-place holiday sale right now. There's no code needed. I think, and to be totally transparent, I think it comes from years of like, if anyone's 23 right now, you grew up, I feel like we grew up at a very weird time where like Instagram started when I was like nine. and it wasn't big enough for anyone to know that like a nine-year-old,

10-year-old shouldn't probably be on Instagram. And at the time it really wasn't that crazy. So I was on social media when I was like 10 years old, which sounds so crazy now, but at the time it wasn't like that. And so posting on social media for 10 years and growing, growing, growing, growing, growing, getting to a point where it was my job,

it just, I think I just came from years of like feeling like, everything was growing and I was having to keep up with it and like I felt like I had to trade my personal life and my privacy for more followers and I just didn't like that and like personally for me like I value privacy and value um yeah I just value privacy a lot and so I think that posting on social media and feeling like I had to to keep up with my job to keep up with what I'd done for so many years to keep up with all the people who have followed me and who I love that followed me and like I felt like I had to keep up with that and I had to sacrifice my privacy for that and that was just not something that I was comfortable with anymore and like I just had

to pull pull back from and so that's just personal to me and not everyone's story but for me it just wasn't something that I could continue doing and like being a good mental health space that's really wise and actually the other day I said something to a friend I was like if I didn't believe in like the impact it can make I would just not have social media and she said really it seems like you actually really like it and you're really natural on it. And I was like, well, I guess I shouldn't say that. I was like, because I actually do love it. Like the fun of it is super natural to me. I love like posting fun things, stories, sharing my life with people. Like that doesn't bother me. I mean, think about me when I was a kid before there was social media and I had like my little

video camera and I was always recording myself talk, you know, just before any of that. So that is natural to me. But I was telling her, I don't like what social media has become because it is a job. And it is, like, there is a huge part of it that is a job now. And there is a huge part of it that is, you know, having to keep up and posting so often and all this stuff where it's like that side, I do not like that it's become that. And it makes you just not want to share it because you're like, this is too much. But I'm like, okay, help me, Lord, to keep it fun and to keep it encouraging and keep it what it was originally created to be and not what, you know, this new technology has made it to be.

You know, like, I'm trying to stay true to it, but it's hard. Yeah. Jeline, you have anything on that? Yeah, I think of that in two ways. The first is just removing distraction from your life. I mean, I had someone tell me one time, if you're consuming, you're not creating. And that, you know, that really hit me as a creative kind of person, and especially me, because I get really into, you know, I'll watch YouTube videos and stuff.

And I'll find myself, I'm like, oh, I've watched. a hundred hours on making something out of leather but I haven't actually made anything like at some point if you want if you enjoy the things you're watching you've got to turn it off

so you can actually make the thing and that goes with any distraction in your life like I like to read that's something I do but I find myself scrolling for five minutes where I could actually be doing something I enjoy more than scrolling

but it's just such a distraction and then the second thing I think is just about comparison or the way that makes you feel. I mean, that's in normal life. If I have a friend, and I've had friends before who are just super negative

and every time I hang out with them, I get really negative. And I'm like, I just need to, why am I hanging out with them? Whenever I just come away from that. Being negative or feeling bad or whatever. Like, if I'm,

if Instagram or TikTok or whatever is making me feel jealous, or a comparison or not joyful or wasting time, like, why would I keep doing that? You got to have the self-control to step away. Yeah, like, I think it feels like such a cultural, like you have to be in it. You have to be watching to, like, keep up with what's going on, but you really just don't. It's weird as if you step away for me, every time I've logged off, I don't miss it. Right.

Like, I don't go back to it because I'm like, oh, I miss it so much. You know, I normally go back to it because I feel purpose. Like I'm like, oh, like now I feel like my mind is clear. I feel purpose in it. Of course, like I miss seeing my friend's things and that kind of stuff. But you don't miss like just the time that you feel wasted from scrolling. You know, it's not like that. It's like, oh, I hate I miss your announcement or you know, close with your family or whatever.

And so I feel like always come back with better boundaries just because I'm like, oh, this is what I know I want out of this. I want to see my friends. I want to catch out with people. I want to post things that are encouraging to other people. I want to do fun trends again because I actually enjoy that. Like we laugh a lot when we try to do a dance or something like that. But I come back healthier and stronger. And the other thing I want to say too, just in full transparency, because we were talking

about this beforehand where I just did a Q&A on social media. I was like, ask me anything. And I had so many questions about if I get Botox, which is kind of funny. And this answer is really not about Botox. But I'm saying it to this point. I was like, should have answered this? I don't get Botox. but I don't want people to feel ashamed if they do get Botox.

I don't have like a strong opinion against it. I just don't. But one thing I love is when people do share what they've had done because it's like helpful to set your expectation on like what natural skin can look like or what your skin could look like if you did that just by somebody just being honest with how they do it. And for me, with social media and doing all the things I'm doing

and having three kids, if I did not have a team helping me around my social media, I could not keep up with social media, 100% and so I would never want someone to look at me and go like man how does she have three kids and does all this podcasting whatnot and also have something to post every day literally I have a full team of people helping me do that helping me think of ideas helping me say hey I love when you said that let's let's write a caption about it and I write my content I fully approve anything that goes up I'm sending my pictures to my team so it is me but if I didn't have them helping spark what I should do or helping keep up with things for me or even posting it half the time

because I'm just like busy beep bopping around my everyday life I would yeah I wouldn't be able to do it and so I just think that's just good to hear other people say like how they actually do it that's how I do it and I actually post a lot on my close friends my very personal life like with my kids because again I love social media and that's the fun of it to me and then I have a team help me with the job side of it because I was starting to lose interest I want to highlight that because I think that doesn't just go for social media, but any job that you have out there, you start doing that job because you love it, you know, or if you're starting a business or whatever, you start doing because you love it. But the more you, the more your hobby becomes your business, you get further away from the hobby. I was thinking the same thing.

Like I was seen, like for me, that was coffee. I love coffee. I love making coffee. And so I got the coffee shops. And I love being a barista. I love serving. I love roasting the coffee and creating the drinks and creating the flavors and the beans and all that.

But the more it became a business, the further way I got. Then I was just doing taxes and health code and all that, like hiring and all that kinds of stuff. The stuff that I really didn't like about, I wasn't doing my hobby anymore. I wasn't doing the thing I loved. And then once I sold the coffee shops and got back to just roasting the coffee, making drinks. I was like, oh, I love this. You know, I wasn't maybe necessarily making as much money. It was less of a business. But I was back to the hobby rather than making it some kind of like

work thing. Yeah. I was thinking the same thing because I think that obviously that doesn't apply to every job. Like, you know, everyday jobs, that's not always the case that it's your hobby that you just go and do. But I think with social media, that's almost how everyone's career on social media starts is that they love to post and they share about their life and they love to do this and that and then all the sudden they're hit with oh wait this is this can be my job and they're excited about that but then all of a sudden that takes a turn and now it's this thing that you have to keep up with because it's your livelihood and sometimes that could be really hard and so I think that and with John Chris I think that that's probably similar to his story like he was like love to be

funny and make people laugh and now it's his job and so that like grounding that you have to do is just like, I still have to be myself in this. It's good. Okay, y'all, got to be real. We totally intended to do this whole podcast in one, but things are going so good. I was loving the conversation so much. I love spending time with my brother, sister, Christian. So much good advice for the year.

We literally could not fit it all into one. So we're going to have a part two. Tune in next week for Part Two. Thank you all so much for listening along. This whole year has been incredible, and I know the best is yet to come. Oh, oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.