WHOA That's Good Podcast - You Don't Have to Compare Your Reality to a 15-sec Social Media Clip | Sadie, Rebecca, Freddie & Mya
Episode Date: December 16, 2024Sad-crying to laugh-crying, fears about the future, mom guilt and diaper blowouts — Sadie, Rebecca Robertson Loflin, Freddie Amos, and Mya Ramirez are back to answer more of YOUR questions about mot...herhood. Since their last episode, Rebecca and Mya have both given birth and share updates about their adorable babies. Rebecca has a very REAL story to share that started with a diaper blowout and escalated quick! She's laughing about it now, but 24 hours earlier she wasn't (and haven't we all been there?! Plus, Mya shares encouragement for any mom out there struggling with breastfeeding. And Freddie has some great sleep training advice (if that's your thing!). This Episode of WHOA That's Good is Sponsored by: Exclusive $35-off Carver Mat at http://AuraFrames.com . Use code WHOA at checkout to save! https://storyworth.com/whoa — Get $10 off on your first purchase today! https://www.trymiracle.com/whoa — Get 40% off + 3 FREE towels with code WHOA at checkout! - Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Transcript
Discussion (0)
To any of you moms out there who have gone through your kid being sick, it is just the
worst. And when your kid's sick, you want to have the best products on the market to help them feel
better as quickly as possible. So I want to tell you all about Navage Baby Aspirator and Inhaler.
They're a baby safe pediatrician recommended and have been a total game changer when it comes to
giving the girls relief from congestion and snotty noses. We've been loving our Navage Baby Aspirator
because it is
rechargeable, gentle, and has a great design. Moms, you know you've tried all the different ones.
It is hard to get snot out, but this actually works. Plus the unique anti-backfill feature and
sealed control buttons mean it will be cleaner and more durable than any other aspirators,
which is such a gift because those things are so gross to clean out. We've also been using the Navage Baby Inhaler and it works like a dream to break down congestion
using a sterile drug-free saline solution that moisturizes and soothes the girls upper respiratory
system.
It even lasts about 50% longer than any of their top inhaler brands.
I love that I can trust the Navage Baby Aspirator Inhaler to be there whenever I need it.
Parenting is just hard sometimes, especially when kids are sick.
So make life easier.
Order the new Navaj Baby Aspirator and inhaler today.
We love them, we know you will.
My listeners can also order directly from my exclusive URL,
navaj.com slash woebaby.
Visit the site to order both products
and get full product details.
Again, that's navage, N-A-V-A-G-E dot com slash woe baby.
And don't wait, order now at navage.com slash woe baby.
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh,
What's up sisters and friends, happy Monday everybody.
This is gonna be such a fun podcast.
We actually have done part one of this podcast
back in July.
It was really cool because I think we named it
like the Tales of Motherhood,
but it should have been like the TMI of Motherhood
because it was just all the realness and all the things.
At the time, Rebecca was pregnant with Xander,
Maya was pregnant with Mila,
Collins was about four months old,
and Honey and Haven, you know, were just going for it.
I can't remember, I guess they were two,
wait, no, Honey had just turned three,
and Haven had just turned one at the time.
So now, here we are, and Rebecca is five weeks out,
postpartum with Xander.
How old is Mila now?
She's gonna be five months on the 15th.
Okay, that's crazy.
Five months, five weeks,
and then Collins is coming up on a year.
That's so crazy.
I wish I could not believe that.
It's so sweet though.
I know it's so sad,
but it's about to get so fun too.
It's both.
The whole thing is both.
And then Honey and Haven, you know, 18 months,
three and a half.
We are very busy. I actually went and got a massage this morning and my shoulders are so tight
and like so many knots. And she's like, you know, what are you doing? I'm like, I'm holding
two children. I'm a mom. Who are like combined over 50 pounds. And so yeah, so we're all
in the thick of it. And we asked if you guys had any questions revolving around
pregnancy, motherhood, postpartum,
and y'all sent in so many great questions.
I mean, honestly, this is so good.
So I want us to get into those questions,
but first just want to have a little check in
with everybody where we're all at.
So Freddie, how's everything been?
Collin's turned in a year.
What are your highs and your struggles right now?
So our highs would be she's crawling as of today.
We're almost to walking, but she's crawling.
And that just has given her so much independence.
Like I can, this morning, I walked to my room to get ready
and normally she follows me,
but today she just wanted to like hang out
in the living room.
And it was like, wow, I can get ready on my own.
Like I'm not having to pick her up and hold her now.
And she wants me to hold her.
She'll like reach up, which is really sweet.
She's laughing way more, which is fine.
But our lows right now is she's getting up pretty early.
And now she's at the phase where when she's up, like she will sit up in her crib and she
will like try to get out.
Like we're not just laying down anymore.
So it's like, I'm watching the monitor going,
oh gosh, I don't want her to get out of her crib,
which we probably should lower the bed.
We just haven't done that yet.
So that's partly on us, but you're busy.
You like don't really have time to do those things sometimes.
So probably need to get on that.
And we're teething.
Oh, yeah. That we're teething. Oh.
Yeah.
That's a low.
Yeah, it's just all, like I know when she's teething
because she's really clingy and she's just fussy
for no reason and I think we're starting separation anxiety.
Oh yeah, that's hard.
Mm-hmm.
That's really hard.
I'm not ready for that one.
They're more like attached too,
because they're like, you know, when they're calm and stuff.
They know when you're leaving, like what that means.
Yes.
How long are you gonna be?
She kind of like looks at me sometimes
when I'm not holding her,
like why are you not holding me?
So we're getting to that phase, which is sweet.
It is, but then it's like,
when I need to go do something,
and the screaming can happen.
It's just, yeah.
Don't look at me like that.
Don't look at me like that.
That's so real. That's so real.
That's so real.
That's sweet.
How's Mila doing?
Highs and lows right now?
Oh, good.
Okay, highs would be Mila is finding her voice finally.
So she's starting to coo.
She's starting to laugh, which I just like love so much
because I feel like I'm like finally seeing
like her personality, if that makes sense.
Cause I feel like she was such a sleepy baby like for the first few months like that girl can sleep
Like she still to this day loves to sleep
That is a blessing
It is a blessing but also I'm like well
This is fun, you know what I mean
So, um, I love to see her laughing and cooing
and finding her voice and I have been like,
I feel like she should be like cooing by now.
Like why isn't she doing this?
But now she is.
So it makes me excited.
So she doesn't do it all the time.
That's so funny you say that though.
Cause I remember Googling like,
what to do with a three week old.
Yes.
Cause I was such a doer.
I was there too.
And I'm like, what should we do?
Cause you just sleep and sit there. Should I play a game? You can't play a game. Should I'm like, what should we do? Because you just sleep.
And since they're should I play a game?
You can't play a game.
Should I get a toy?
You don't even care.
And then people ask you like,
oh, what's their personality?
And you're like, am I supposed to know
what her personality is?
I have no idea.
She just sleeps all day and burps and poops.
It's funny, it's kind of like coming from
like the first time mom,
because when they sleep so much, you worry.
You're like, something's wrong.
You wake them up.
But then once you have multiple, you're like, oh my gosh.
I can't sleep.
This is such a great thing.
I remember worrying about having to wake him up,
like checking his breathing to make sure he was still breathing.
My finger under her nose.
I didn't realize it's such a privilege.
It's so true.
When Honey was walking fast, I was like, yes,
trying to get her to walk.
And then Haven started walking at 10 minutes.
I was like, what?
Like, no, we didn't have to do this so soon.
You're like, wait a minute.
It's funny you say that, Rebecca,
because I was at the doctor, and I was like,
she's just sleeping so much.
Like, should I be worried?
And they're like, well, how many hours would you say?
And I'm like, like 95% of the day.
And she's like, oh yeah, baby should sleep like 23 hours.
And I'm like, oh, got it.
That made me feel better.
That's so funny.
Okay, what's the lows right now?
Lows are, we are getting over a huge roller coaster
of weeks on end of Mila being sick
and not testing positive for anything,
which I wouldn't want her to,
but in a sense of like, we are not getting answers
for any of her health problems.
And we were having so many
and they just felt like they were stacking
on top of each other.
And we just kind of felt like, man,
I don't know where we go from here.
Like, what are we doing wrong?
Like, what do we do?
What's wrong with her?
But I feel like we're finally figuring out what it is.
Finally, we're on the rise, we're on the uphill.
So I hope that this is what's working.
So we are just now kind of learning within the last week
what's kind of been going on.
So hopefully that'll be a positive now,
but it has been a rough few weeks.
That was really hard on you emotionally as a mom,
because when you don't know what's going on with your child,
but you know something's wrong, that is so stressful. They can't tell you.
They can't tell you anything and you know something's wrong and then trying to
convince someone else like a doctor or convince anyone like something is wrong
you're like I don't know how else to explain it but I know something's wrong
these are the problems and it's not this this this this or that. Like we've
already done those things what can we do now? Yeah. You know it and it's not this, this, this, this, or that. Like we've already done those things. What can we do now?
And you know, it's hard to advocate for someone that can't tell you what's wrong.
But I feel like I've learned a lot in that process of like advocating formula.
Because I feel like I've never, that's never been really my personality, like advocating for myself.
So it's been like, whoa, who is this person like actually advocating for like someone?
So it's been a good whoa, who is this person actually advocating for someone?
So it's been a good growing thing for me too.
There is such a new confidence that comes over you as a mom.
You're not afraid of confrontation for your kid.
You know, you're not afraid that you'll do anything.
That is so true.
I've seen that in you, Maya.
It's so cool, because I remember whenever I was first
starting to get to know you, and you told me
that about yourself.
You're like, I don't really stand up for myself.
And I really wanted you to know within your job
and everything, please tell me what you like,
what you don't like.
I want to know communication is so important.
But you've done that so well with Mila.
And I remember Freddie and I talking about one day,
and I remember with Stephanie, I can't remember.
We were like, I hope Mila knows that she's doing
such a good job as a mom.
Sometimes you can feel like, do people think I'm overreacting? I'm like, no, affirming you. You're doing a good job as a mom. Like, because sometimes you can feel like, you know, do people think I'm overreacting to it?
I'm like, you know, like affirming you,
like you're doing a great job.
That's what you're supposed to do.
Like you're the one to do it.
And I know that's been hard, but you've done so good.
That means the world to me, truly.
Yes.
Okay. 18 months highs and lows.
18 months with Haven has been so fun.
She has been like so different
than I thought she was going to be. Speaking to the personality, cause as a baby, she been so fun. She has been like so different than I thought she was going
to be speaking to the personality.
Cause as a baby, she was so easy, like just ease all ease.
And everyone told me that they're easy baby,
they're a hard toddler.
And it's not that she's hard necessarily.
She's just wild and like, she's so funny,
like truly hilarious.
And everything she says is so aggressive.
And that's what's been so funny.
Like, truly.
Like, we'll be like, what is a cow saying?
She's like, moo!
What is a horse saying?
Nay!
Like, nothing is chill.
Like, nothing is ease.
Like, everything is full speed.
Like, we're not walking, we're running.
And so I feel like the high and low goes hand in hand
of like, it's really fun,
but it's also like really, really, really busy.
And she's so mommy attached, which is very sweet,
like you said, but really hard,
because no one else can do anything.
And we were just on a trip for 10 days,
and it was just so mommy.
And it's funny, because I remember before I had kids,
being with Zayn or John Shepherd, and they'd want y'all,
and I'd be like, I can't wait to have my own.
You're like, just wants me.
And then you're the mom, you're like,
oh, I really wish you'd actually go see other people,
you know?
But it's really sweet, and I love that,
but it also is like hard.
And then Honey is like three right now,
and I will say kind of similar in like,
she's so funny, her personality is so just loud right now.
Like she just says the funniest little things
that I wish I wrote all of them down.
Like I was telling Rebecca about us in traffic the other day
in New Orleans and I was driving
and I was having to go pick up Christian and I got lost
and I was stressed because New Orleans driving
is so stressful in general.
And it was rerouting me to-
With kids in the car. Yes, with two kids and honey was like because New Orleans driving is so stressful in general. And it was rerouting me to- With kids in the car.
Yes, with two kids.
And Honey was like talking my ear off
and it was trying to reroute me to Bourbon Street.
And I was like, no, I am not driving down Bourbon Street.
If I get stuck on Bourbon Street with my two little ones,
I don't even want to go down Bourbon Street.
So then I like intentionally missed the turn,
which then was like putting me even further away
from Christian.
And I'm seeing like the time on the map go up.
I'm like, oh my gosh.
So I'm like, honey, you have to stop talking because I'm lost.
And then she goes, you're not lost, mommy.
I said, I am lost and I'm stressed out
and I just need you to be quiet for a little bit.
She said, mommy, we will make it together
because we are Anna and Elsa.
Like just like that.
It was like so funny.
I love how funny.
That's amazing.
The fun is fun, but the sass is sass.
Like, it is like, whoa, your words can be really funny
and also like daggers.
And so I feel like some of the punches
pack a little bit heavier right now
because you're like, that was intentional.
Yeah.
That hurt.
So that's kind of what we're going through right now.
Isn't it crazy too to think that like your kid's words
can hurt you? Like, you know what I mean? Like,'t it crazy to think that like your kids words can hurt you?
Like you know what I mean? Like never did I ever think like not that Mila speaking
but like I'm thinking about like honey and I'm like yeah that would probably hurt my feelings. No honey has hit me with some
power punches and yeah it's crazy because you you think and your mind she's three years old. Yeah.
But I'm like but it still was kind of like brutal because I'm like you knew that was gonna hurt me and you chose to say it. So that's new years old. But I'm like, but it still was kind of like brutal. Because I'm like, you knew that was gonna hurt me
and you chose to say it.
So that's new for sure.
If you're like me, then you might have thousands of photos
and your camera roll just stuck there on your phone.
If you're looking for a way to keep those awesome memories
alive from gathering dust on your photo app,
then you need to check out AuraFrame.
AuraFrames were named the number one digital photo frame by Wirecutter because they make it easy for you to upload and display unlimited photos and videos right from your phone.
You can even preload an AuraFrame with a personalized message for a one-of-a-kind gift for someone that you love.
The high resolution displays make your photos look like real prints and they'll appear instantly on the frame
whenever you upload from anywhere in the world.
Those cute vacay pics don't have to wait until you get home
plus the Aura app gives you complete control
over who has access to the frame.
And you can also invite as many friends
and family members as you want.
This is a gift that truly keeps on giving.
I've gotten it for several people for Christmas
and my mother-in-law just got one.
She just got one for her mom for her birthday.
So this is just always a win.
If you just want a solid win as a gift,
Aura Frames is where you should be shopping.
So save on the perfect gift by visiting auraframes.com
to get $35 off Aura's best selling Carver matte frames
by using promo code, woe at checkout.
That's Aura, A-U-R-A, frames.com with the promo code, woe.
This deal is exclusive to our listeners,
so make sure that you get it now in time for the holidays.
Terms and conditions apply.
Rebecca, you have your hands full.
Three kids.
What are some highs and lows at the moment?
So it's like such a chaotic but sweet season, you know?
And I just, you know, I, the third one was kind of like
a little surprise on plan.
So I didn't know how I was gonna handle it,
but it was really a lot better than I thought it was gonna be.
And the older siblings are handling super well
and Holland is like the sweetest big sister.
And she, you know, and she didn't want to have a brother,
actually, at first she like convinced
she was having a little sister.
But then now she loves everything
about having a little baby brother.
And she's so helpful, and I love seeing that,
and like, Zang too, you know, and just the dynamic, it's really sweet.
And sometimes I look at ourself, I'm like, wow,
this is really like complete.
I feel like, you know, in a way it was like,
it wasn't planned, but then I can't see any,
like change anything now, you know.
Did you think it was complete before, Xander?
Yeah, I thought, yeah, so I thought so, but now like,
I look at us, I'm like, wow, it really is.
And I'm like, Holland is the second child,
the middle child, she cannot like be the baby.
She, you know, and it really helped her
step into this like, she has like responsibility
and she really has done better and just not as, you know,
she's kind of, and you know,
I don't know if you've seen her lately with like,
she's really kind of like out of her shell more.
She is, yeah.
And playing, you know, and so I just see that.
She played with Honey and Haven the whole night
and it was so funny because she wanted Honey
to hug her so bad and Honey,
if someone wants her to do something, she's hungry.
Oh, she was so upset when y'all left.
She was like,
Honey didn't give me a kiss and a hug.
I know, but then I sent Haven in there
and Haven was like hugging her and kissing her
and Holland was cracking up.
She thought it was so funny,
but she was still like,
Honey!
And Honey's like out the door
and Haven's like.
Oh, she was like, I'm so excited.
I'm seeing my cousins, like, you know, and.
She used to not be like that.
Yeah, she, it's been like really sweet.
And you know, Honey and Ella was talking
about having a sleepover or something.
And then they all came over to me and said,
we're going to have a sleepover,
but Holland doesn't want to.
And then Holland was like, no, I want to.
I just want to do it at my house.
And then Honey was like, well, maybe me and Ella can do it.
You don't have to do it.
And then she was like, no, I want to do it.
I just want to do it at my house.
The three girls are hilarious.
But yeah, so it's been really sweet.
But obviously, it's so hard.
And, you know, break down to individually,
Zhang's been in a way kind of like back to,
I think he has PTSD from when I had Holland
and just how needy she was.
And so he's been kind of saying like,
now he can express himself. He tell
us at night, you know, he doesn't get enough tension and all that. And one day he, which
I'm glad he can tell that to us. And he told John Reed one day, he was kind of having a,
you know, just a hard day with, you know, we were, we weren't available for them. And he said, I really just want to have a normal breakfast that we used to go eat breakfast all the time.
So John really took him in the morning to go get breakfast, like at seven in the morning.
And it was just like he wanted to do that because, you know, and so it was kind of it was really sweet.
But I know it's hard for him,
but he is handling really well.
And with Holland, she is regressing with her potty training,
which I've read before, like everyone always tell you,
don't start new big life changes till, you know,
at the same time.
So like we started potty training kind of like right before
Zinder was born and now she was doing so good
and now she is kind of regressing.
And then we actually had a funny story.
Rebecca came in today.
Came in fresh.
I was like, oh, you're in it, Rebecca.
Are you sure you're ready to do a whole talk on motherhood?
And then we were like, oh, you're in it, Rebecca. Are you sure you're ready to do a whole talk on motherhood? And then we were like, but this is motherhood.
I was crying last night, like, sad crying,
but now I can cry and laugh crying.
Last night.
I can share the story.
It's so real.
That is motherhood in a nutshell.
Last night, I was crying actual tears.
Today, I will cry out of laughter.
So last night, Xander had like just a blowout, you know,
and it was like a bad one that leaked through his clothes
onto my shirt and then onto like just everything on the couch,
you know.
So I was just changing him and all that.
And then I looked at Holland,
I can tell she started doing her little pinch like to like
her eye get really tired.
I just know she has to poop.
Every mom knows their kids poop face.
And so I was like, Holland, look, are you about to poop?
She said, no, no.
I was like, no, baby, it's okay.
Cause I know she's like always like trying not to tell me when I'm busy.
I was like, no, let me go get daddy to bring you a little potty in here so you can poop right here.
And then she said, okay, okay.
And so Jhonnie brought the potty in and then she like, so then she took out her underwear and then sat on the potty. And then we realized she already pooped on her panty.
But it was kind of like a soft one.
I'm only laughing because I already noticed.
It was everywhere.
It was like, I guess she ate something bad.
I don't know.
But John Ray didn't realize it and so he stepped on it.
It gets worse.
And it got all over his foot.
And John Ray does not handle like that kind of stuff well.
Like he would literally gad just like from like a booger.
Like most dads don't.
I don't know what y'all says.
No, Parker is not.
Are you serious?
Like our dog used to have like eye booger.
He was like, like, you're so weird.
And so he, I knew he was like, I have like eye booger. He was like, you're so weird. And so he, I knew he was like stressed,
but I was kind of like, wanted to laugh.
And then he was like, sort of kind of just like,
screaming at Holland basically was like, you know, like,
and then he's like, screaming at me saying like,
well, we really need help and this helps.
Like, then I felt like attacked.
Then you take it personal as a mom.
You're like, I can handle it.
I can handle it.
I'm like, why can you handle this?
I'm like, just clean out this explosive flow out.
And then, so then I was like, you don't need to freak out.
Like, you know, don't freak out just because she,
you know, she's poop.
And then it's freaking her out.
So the Hollens are kind of getting anxious,
like thinking like she's in trouble
and like she's like grossed out by her own poop.
And she accidentally stepped on her poop too.
No.
Then she was like, ah!
Then she started running around trying to wipe it off.
We have two people, Jean-Ri and her,
kind of freaking out, running around with poop
and smearing all over the rug.
Oh my gosh.
And I was screaming, well, I wasn't screaming
in my account.
I just said, Jean-Ri, you need to calm down.
You don't need to, because you're freaking her out.
And then he just screamed in my face like, I am calm.
I was like, you don't need to talk to me like this.
And then he literally, he had a paper towel in his hand.
I want to say it was the one he was wiping the poop We don't know for sure
And he threw it in my face
And I just was like
I just lost it and then I set the baby down
Took Holland I was like I know this
Oh, yeah, yeah, and I said, I picked her up and I said,
you don't beep in my face and you don't like,
and I just pick her up, pick the baby,
and then we went to the bathroom
and I was like trying to rinse her off.
And so that was a rough night, but we cleaned up everything
and then I didn't want to talk to John Rhee.
I was like, no, for the rest of the night.
And then, so I end up saying like,
told John Rhee at the end of the night, he was like,
I thought it was funny that you threw paper down
at the poopy paper down mommy's face.
And what does that word mean?
Like that mom said?
Oh no.
And I was like, oh my gosh.
And I was like, I feel so bad because, you know,
like this is just like your kids,
they're watching you for everything.
And you know, and I told John Rhee, I was like,
why are you setting an example for John Rhee
that you can throw things in a girl's face? Like, you know,hee, I was like, why are you setting an example for John Rhee that you can throw things in a girl's face?
Like, you know?
And then he was like, well,
you were the one that said a bad word
and that our son is worried,
like wondering what that word is about.
He might say it at school today.
So we were just like,
it was just so humbling.
It was just a humbling experience.
We're all laughing because we've all been there. We've all.
This morning, I was like, or this afternoon,
I was like, you do not have to come on this podcast.
If you're still upset about it.
She's like, I think I can laugh about it now.
I'm like, only if you can laugh about it.
But just to give you comfort, we've all been there.
Yes.
We've all felt that.
I literally told her last night, we had a very similar situation
where Haven all of a sudden was holding her diaper and said,
Poop, poop, and then threw it. I was like, oh no.
And then Honey pooped in her pool, and she doesn't poop in her...
She's fully pitied, she just sleeps in her pool, and then Christian's mad at her, and then Christian gets so mad at her that she starts crying because she feels guilty.
I was like, this happened to us last night too.
And then you get mad at each other because then you're blaming each other.
And how we handled it. And I'm like, this happened to us last night too. And then you get mad at each other because then you're blaming each other. And how we handled it.
And I'm like, yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
My family is full of storytellers,
as you guys probably know if you've ever
listened to this podcast.
Preserving a lifetime of memories and stories is a big task,
but Story Worth is here to help you so that you can hang on
to those awesome moments for years to come. Each week, Story Worth will email your loved one is here to help you so that you can hang on to those awesome moments
for years to come.
Each week, Story Worth will email your loved one
a thought-provoking question that you get to help choose,
and you'll be able to ask things like,
what's the bravest thing you've ever done,
or what's the furthest you've ever traveled,
and all your loved one has to do
is just respond with a story.
Long or short, doesn't really matter
whatever they wanna put into it.
You'll get a copy of their responses
as they're submitted over the course of a year and
then Story Worth will actually compile all of the amazing stories and photos
into a beautiful, fun keepsake book so that you get to revisit those memories
for generations to come. With more than 35,000 five-star reviews on Trust Pilot
and millions of stories preserved over the last 10 years, it's clear that
families are loving Story Worth just as much as we do.
Honestly, this is such a great gift.
I talk about this with podcasting all the time,
but before podcasting,
I don't feel like I asked as many intentional questions
that I'm so glad I have.
Even asked my family members intentional questions
because I know their stories now.
I actually got my grandpa Story Worth
and we got his book at Christmas
and he printed it out for the entire family to have. And it's such a treasure for us. My great grandma's actually working on her story
worth right now which is so special for our family to have. So help your family members share and
capture their stories this holiday season with story worth. Go to storyworth.com slash woe today
and save ten dollars off your first purchase. That's story worth, s-t-o-R-Y-W-O-R-T-H.com slash woe
to save $10 on your first purchase, storyworth.com slash woe.
It's totally real, which leads me to a question
many people have about mom guilt,
which I think that mom guilt goes
in like so many different directions.
Like you can feel guilty for saying a word you shouldn't have said. You can feel
guilty for doing an action you shouldn't have done. You can feel guilty for not
even doing something wrong but like needing to go to work and your kids are
home or feeling like what if I you know I fed them formula, I didn't breastfeed
or I did this too long and not that or I didn't know they were sick. Like there's
so many different things. So what have y'all's run-ins with mom guilt been
and how have you began to overcome it
or have you overcome it?
Freddie, you want to kick us off?
Yeah, I think-
The counselor.
The counselor, the counselor.
You don't have to be a counselor right now.
You can be a friend.
I struggle with mom guilt.
I think it's so odd because I,
and I don't know this like to be true,
but I just think like, I wonder pre-social media,
how moms felt about mom guilt,
is it induced by social media?
Totally think so.
Because there's so many things I see.
And the first one that kind of came to my mind
was this mom that said she was checking her emails
during bath time and her child looked at her 10 times
during bath time wanting to make an emotional connection and she wasn't looking back in how she was emotionally neglecting her child looked at her 10 times during bath time, wanting to make an emotional connection
and she wasn't looking back
in how she was emotionally neglecting her child.
And I was like, oh my gosh,
have I emotionally neglected my child?
And so it just has caused a lot of,
and that's just one example, but many things like that.
But I don't know, I think there's so many
like different areas of mom guilt.
For me, it's more so like, I want to be present
when I'm with my kids.
Right now, just one, but like, eventually when we have more,
I want to be present with all of them.
And sometimes I struggle with like going to work.
Sometimes I don't.
We've talked about this.
Sometimes I'm like, thank goodness I get to go to work.
And sometimes I'm like, I wish I was staying home.
But most recently, there was an event where Collins was coughing
really, really bad.
And I just thought she had a bad cough.
I didn't really think about it because she wasn't acting weird.
And Parker was like, you, why have you not taken her to the doctor yet?
Her cough is really bad.
You need to take her.
And so I was like, okay, maybe I'll take her in the morning.
He's like, no, you need to take her.
And I kind of was like, all right, well, nothing's like,
she's fine, like she's gonna be okay.
And it came back RC.
And then I was like, oh my gosh, I totally missed it.
Like I'm her mom, I'm supposed to know when she's sick.
And I just brushed that off.
And if he would have not said, like, you need to take her,
what could have happened?
And so I started spiraling into this mom guilt of like,
man, I really missed the mark.
And then I just had to go, okay, wait,
like I was able to stay home and take care of her.
Like I canceled my day.
I put her first once I knew and I was there,
I was present and I held her and I rocked her
and I did all the things that I needed to do
to take care of her.
And just because I didn't think something was so severe
doesn't mean that I'm a bad mom.
But it's like instinctual, it's like,
that's where my mind goes.
It's like, I'm a bad mom.
I did something wrong.
I missed something.
I'm a bad mom.
And so I say all that with the social media part to go,
I think a lot of the times social media makes me think
I'm a worse mom than I actually am.
Because if I'm just comparing to myself and my standard,
then I'm not as harsh on myself.
Like if I know I'm lacking as a mom today,
I can just go, okay, well, like I need to put my phone down
or I need to be a little bit more present or whatever,
versus social media telling me I'm a bad mom
because I'm doing something I shouldn't be doing.
That's real. No, that's so true.
I think social media plays a huge,
I think it's become like,
it is a true feeling you feel,
but it's become like such a bigger deal,
and like almost like a buzzword kind of,
like mom guilt.
But I feel like with social media,
yeah, it makes you feel guilty for things
you shouldn't even feel guilty for,
because that's not even like what makes you a good mom,
that's just something that that mom did.
That's a good idea, but not like the standard
for all moms or motherhood and what it has to be.
My thing with mom guilt, like I used to feel guilty
for like working and stuff.
And then actually Dr. Amen on this podcast
like switched everything for me whenever he said,
he said, guilty moms will raise confused kids.
He was like, be a confident mom.
He's like, be confident in your decisions.
He's like, if you're gonna work, work,
and be confident in what you're doing and how you're doing.
And when you get home from work,
if your kid's sad that you're at work,
don't start feeling guilty and I should have been.
So like, mommy, I want you to work,
and let me tell you what I did,
and let me tell you what I got to be a part of.
And it's so cool, because yesterday I got home
and Honey said, I said, what was your favorite part
of your day, which I always do. And she, you know, told me, and then she said, what was your favorite part of your day, which I always do.
And she, you know, told me.
And then she said, what was your favorite part of your day?
And I told her something that I got to be a part of.
And she went, no way.
Just like that.
And I was like, isn't that cool?
And then she was like, can I do that with you one day?
And I was like, yeah, you can.
And then she said, yeah, because kids should do that too.
And I was like, you should.
And we had a conversation about it.
And I was like, that reminded me when Dada said that, like, I thought about that in the moment. I was like, be should. And we had a conversation about it. And I was like, that reminded me when Dr. Every said that,
I thought about that in the moment.
I was like, be confident in what I did today.
It was really fun and exciting.
And then she was excited for me.
And so I think about that with mom.
Mom was always, she never felt, I never sensed that.
Sorry for Tripp she went on.
She told us about them.
And when I remember them, I don't think my mom was gone.
I think my mom was a part of this or that or whatnot.
And it's so cool,
cause now I see the fruit of what she was doing.
And so that was super, super good advice.
But yeah, mom guilt can come in different ways.
I think right now I don't feel guilty about those things.
The thing I feel truly guilty about is my attention span,
cause that actually is how I need to be a better mom.
It's like with my phone and stuff.
Like I don't want to be on my phone when I'm with my kids,
but so often because I'm tired,
that's just what I resort to.
And so those are the things I catch myself for.
And in that, that's like a healthy sense of guilt
where it's like, I actually shouldn't be doing that,
as opposed to like a non-realistic expectation
I'm putting on myself.
And to social media, I just want to say too,
as someone who does social media for a living,
Rebecca, you can probably speak to this too,
I'm posting a reel today about watching Christmas movies
as the kids, and that is not the way it goes down.
I'm clipping pictures of us watching it,
and the popcorn, and the cookies,
but last night when we watched Christmas movies,
it was an argument for what movie we were gonna watch,
and all this stuff and like,
you don't see that in the real.
And like, is it wrong for me to post a cute thing
on family?
No, but it also like, you shouldn't think
that that's how perfect it is.
Like you have to also remind yourself,
there is a reality behind this 15 second clip
with music in the background.
You can't hear the baby screaming,
you can't hear Honeymad that we're not watching
the Grinch for the 100th time., you can't hear Honey Mad that we're not watching the Grinch for the 100th time.
Like you can't hear all of that, you know?
Yeah, absolutely.
And with the social media thing,
like I think I can kind of speak,
like I was so excited about breastfeeding,
like this might be TMI, I don't know, but.
Not TMI, no I think TMI on this particular podcast.
Love it.
Well, you know, I was excited about breastfeeding,
like so excited, one of the things I was looking forward to and like I remember like it was so hard to
get Mila to latch.
It was so hard to get her to stay to latch.
It was hard.
It was she was crying.
I was crying.
Isaac was stressed.
Like we were, everyone was stressed in these moments.
And I remember one night in particular, like I, it was like a 2 a.m. feeding.
I was trying to get her to latch.
She wouldn't latch.
I'm hard as a rock.
I am leaking everywhere onto my nightgown,
onto Mila, onto everybody except for
where it was supposed to go.
That is so real.
I remember just being so, just crying
and just so upset at myself.
And I remember laying in bed and getting on Instagram
because I was like, I just need to forget what just happened
and the first video that popped up was a mom
that was talking about breastfeeding is the only way
there's a connection with you and the baby
and it's the most peaceful thing and I was like,
oh my gosh, that was not peaceful.
That was not, me and Mila were not connecting.
We were not connecting at all.
And I remember after seeing that video,
I told myself, I was like,
oh, I'm gonna continue to breastfeed.
We're gonna keep doing this.
And for weeks after that,
I was pushing for us to breastfeed.
And finally one night, I just had a breakdown
and I could not do, I had mastitis, clogged ducts,
cause she wasn't, she was not getting anything.
She was hungry, she hadn't gained any weight. And I just remembers, like, cause she wasn't, she was not, you know, getting anything. She was hungry, she hadn't gained any weight,
and I just remember Isaac being like,
why don't you just exclusively pump this one time
and just give her a bottle and see how she does?
I'm like, no, I can't, like, she's not gonna like,
no, like, I can't, she's not gonna connect with me,
like, she's gonna connect with the bottle, like, not me.
And I remember being like, just go take a bath
and I'll get the bottle ready, and I was like, okay.
And after I came back, I was like, okay, let's just try it.
Like she's probably not even gonna like it.
And then she like immediately latched the bottle,
drank the bottle, was so happy.
It was the first night she slept through the entire night.
And I was like, okay, Lord, I appreciate that.
And that's just such a social media thing of like,
I saw one video after a night that was so hard
that it like made me stubborn to any other idea
or open to any other idea for weeks,
which like was so difficult.
Like I could have, it could have easily have been resolved.
But you're like, that's the only way.
That's the only way, yeah.
Every situation is so different too
for moms and breastfeeding.
And I think like social media,
moms who breastfeed are like so proud of the fact that they're breastfeeding
and they should be because it's a beautiful thing,
but it's like share so much.
And it is hard for the mom is like, I want to do that,
but it's not like that.
And I really got to see that with having two kids
be so different because honey, it was so hard not happening
and everything going wrong, going wrong, like what you said.
And then with Haven, it was easy.
It was a peaceful connection.
It was like really, like you felt that bond, all this stuff,
but with Honey, that was so different.
And so I had to give up my severeness as well.
And then Honey was so well fed.
She was so chubby and so happy.
And that actually the time that I was feeding her bottles
were peaceful, cause it was like so enjoyable. and then with Haven breastfeeding was like that and
So yeah, it's cool to have I think having multiple kids
It does kind of alleviate some of the mom guilt because you realize how much of it really wasn't your fault and how much it's just preference or
Personality because every kid's so different and I was yeah, I was gonna add to that too. Like I feel like
Mom guilt comes comes with people thinking,
what is the perfect way to do certain things?
But really, it should just be measured by your love.
So if you just think about, if you love on them, it doesn't matter.
It's just like they feel your love.
It's not about the method you do it.
And from all the people standard.
And I feel like you working and coming home,
but you become yourself like that, show your kid,
that's a way to show them love.
And if you just know that you are giving them love,
you shouldn't feel guilty of how you're doing it.
That's so true.
It's like we bring up comparison a lot,
and a lot of it, I think you have to ask yourself,
is this really mom guilt?
Right now, I feel guilty because I'm not being a great mom
because I'm on my phone, whatever.
That is like, okay, good, healthy mom guilt.
Or am I actually just comparing myself to someone else?
Is this the fear of man?
Is this the fear of what other people
are gonna think of me as a mom?
Because a lot of times, I don't think
when you say mom guilt, it's actually mom guilt. I think a lot of times it is the fear of what other people are going to think of me as a mom. Cause a lot of times I don't think when you say mom guilt, it's actually mom guilt.
I think a lot of times it is the fear of what other people will perceive you as a mom.
And it's like, you don't have to prove it to anyone else.
If you just know like you are doing your best and you are showing your kid love, then, you know,
so true.
They kind of, kind of like cancel out all the noises, you know.
So true.
kind of like cancel out all the noises, you know? So true.
When you're thinking of avoiding bacteria,
what comes to mind?
For most of us, it's things like washing our hands
or properly storing food.
But have you ever thought about how much bacteria
might be in the bed that you sleep in at night?
Okay, I know, so crazy.
But traditional bed sheets can harbor more bacteria
than a toilet seat.
I'm so sorry to break the news, which of course can lead to acne, allergy,
congestion, all the things.
Plus it's just gross.
But luckily my friends at Miracle Maid offer a whole line of self-cleaning bedding,
including sheets and pillowcases that prevent up to 99.7% of bacterial growth,
which means that Miracle bedding stays fresher up to three times longer than
regular sheets, leaving you with less laundry and more peace of mind.
Less bacteria can also mean less breakouts,
clogged pores, and allergies, which we are all about.
And not only are Miracle Sheets antibacterial,
they're also self-cooling because they are made
with silver-infused fabrics inspired by NASA.
So you can sleep easy at night
with the perfect temperature all night long.
Miracle Sheets are legit so comfy
and they will not break the bank
because they have a great price tag.
So you can sleep with luxury sheets
without the luxury price tag.
We love ours.
Literally the first night we slept on them,
we were totally sold.
These are the best sheets ever.
Quickly ordered another pair
so that we don't have to have one cycle
of washing without them.
We love our miracle sheets.
So go to trymiracle.com slash woe
to try Miracle Made Sheets today
and whether you're buying them for yourself
or as a gift for a loved one,
you can order today and save over 40% off.
And if you use our promo code woe at checkout,
you'll get three free towels and save an extra 20%.
Miracle is so confident in their product,
it's bad with a 30-day money-back guarantee.
If you aren't 100% satisfied,
you'll actually get a full refund.
Upgrade your sleep with Miracle Made.
Go to trymiracle.com slash woe and use the code woe
to claim your free three piece towel set
and save over 40% off.
Again, that's trymiracle.com slash woe to treat yourself.
Okay, this is kind of a different question.
This is just a preference thing, but I am interested.
Someone said, did you sleep train
or did you let them cry it out?
What was your method with this?
I'm sure we all have different methods.
That's not a big topic.
I'm sure we all have different methods.
That is a big topic.
There's like huge like,
huge surprises.
It's like Republican and Democrat.
It's so true.
Well, and this is, I know we all have differences,
because I know Freddie and I sleep trained so differently.
And so I know we all probably do.
And so I think this is good to say it,
because again, it feels like that.
And on social media, it's like,
I can never tell people that.
And you can't post it, because you might get canceled.
So here on this podcast, we're willing to be canceled
for all you moms listening to know
there's someone out there like you.
Liberal, not liberal, I'm sorry, independent.
Okay, Rebecca, did you sleep train?
Do you sleep train?
What does that look like in y'all's house?
Okay, so we did not sleep train,
but if you know my personality, you know,
like I'm just not that, you know,
like routine kind of person.
And I feel like also we were able to not sleep train.
Like I know people that they have to be on certain schedule.
They have a certain, you know,
they have to keep a routine, then they have to do it.
And no, you know, I don't disagree with any of that,
but we did not, but all three are kind of different,
but Zane was so easy.
We had this like, snoo bed.
Basically, it's like a bassinet that rocks
and then swaddle you and sends you like,
the stress signal and like.
It was like.
That thing is crazy.
And I even, I passed it down to Sadie,
but she didn't even use it.
Well, Honey did not like it at all.
And again, kids are different.
And all the kids are different.
They even loved it.
So, and then Holland didn't like it either.
And she was a stomach sleeper.
And so she slept on her stomach, but you know.
That's another like controversy.
Yes, yes.
And I got it from someone that-
Who was sleeping all the different things.
And it was also someone that was like,
I don't want to tell you this, but you know,
this is like, there's your underground mother club
of belly sleepers, you know?
Cause now they're like telling you you have to like
sleep on your back and all that, you know?
But you know, we waited till after a while,
but I'm like, either she's gonna either be
more unsafe sleeping or she's gonna be
belly sleep in her crib,
cause I would have just held her all night.
So it was like, who cares?
One or the other, sleeping poison.
And with Dender right now, we're kinda in the sleep.
I mean, he's sleeping like every two, three hours.
Yeah, that's just crazy time.
Wherever he can sleep.
There's no sleep training.
I remember telling Freddie that.
I remember it was like week one,
and you were like, talking about her sleep,
I was like, it's gonna be a while.
Yeah, we're like kinda like the car-sea,
car-rise sleep, kinda stroller sleep kind of deal right now.
It's hard, especially in that day.
And I remember telling you this, Freddie,
because I knew you were going to be more of a sleep trainer
than I was.
I was like, I know you're probably not
going to want to take this advice from me,
because I clearly did not sleep train my kids.
But I will say, this is not the time to sleep train.
It was like week one.
I think for me, again, different kids are different.
Honey is such a night owl, which is funny.
I know people are like, you let her stay up that late,
but then she sleeps late.
And also whenever, again, your lifestyle,
we're not in school right now,
we'll have to change that one day,
but we travel so much with her
and she comes to conferences with us,
she comes to things.
And people are always like,
I cannot believe how well behavior kids are,
they're up at night and hanging out.
And I'm like thankful that our lifestyle like that is at home because it's the same on the road. And people are always like, I cannot believe how well behavior kids are. They're up at night and hanging out.
And I'm thankful that our lifestyle
like that is at home because it's the same on the road.
So it works for us, but I get it's
different for other people.
Yeah, I think it's just depending
on how your lifestyle fit in.
And then Haven goes to sleep earlier,
but she'll sleep anywhere.
She'll fall asleep on me.
She'll sleep anywhere.
But she is great in her bed.
She goes down her bed, wakes up in her bed,
whereas, honey, it was so hard to get her to do that.
So every baby's different,
unless you're like very disciplined with that.
But I remember someone gave me the book, Baby Wise to read.
And this is controversial because people love that book.
I was like, I'm not reading it.
Because I knew the premise of it
and I knew I wasn't gonna do it.
And I was like, I don't wanna read this
and then feel like I'm not doing a good job.
Again, whenever it's like,
that's just not the way I want to go about it.
And my kids honestly sleep great.
Like I'm really proud of how they sleep.
But I do remember one thing,
again, controversial of the co-sleeping thing.
I remember one of my best friends was telling me
that she co-sleeps with her baby.
And this was when I had honey and I was like,
I cannot believe you do that.
Like that is crazy, all this stuff. And then I had Haven and Haven honestly co-sles with her baby. And this was when I had honey and I was like, I cannot believe you do that. Like that is crazy, all this stuff.
And then I had Haven and Haven honestly
co-slept with us a lot.
She slept in our bed a lot.
And I of course read a lot about it
and the safe ways to do it and felt peace in it.
I mean, and I thought about how many people
around the country, I mean, around the world
sleep with their baby and for generations.
And like, yes, use wisdom.
Yes, be safe. Yes, read about it. Like, I'm not trying to promote something that's not safe, but
that worked. And so I think, yeah, you have to like take the pressure off and like, yes, practically too.
Like, why is that a rule?
Why is that a rule? Yeah, and a lot of times it's because bad things have happened, but how did that happen?
It wasn't safe, you know, that kind of thing. Yeah, for sure. No, definitely.
I remember whenever I was a young kid working so hard because I wanted to be on the varsity team
in middle school. So I would shoot a hundred shots a day and have to make them before I could go
inside. You know, learning is an essential part of our life
at a young age, but especially for kids.
And KiwiCo clubs is the perfect gift
for growing the curious mind.
Kids will learn fundamentals through hands-on projects
and they'll progressively build on those same skills
with each new KiwiCo club adventure that they get.
So you can watch your kids go from things like
learning the basics of building a bow and arrow
to engineering their own robot.
Y'all this is like legit stuff. With five different clubs to choose from covering topics from science and technology to engineering,
art and math, KiwiCo clubs is a gift that will keep on giving. Plus club members get awesome perks like 10% off orders,
free shipping inside the US, and early access to new crates and projects. KiwiCo encourages kids to be creative, curious, and persistent through their
hands-on projects so that your child develops the confidence to build and to
dream. Their products are durable, high quality, and meant to be played with over
and over again, which is especially great for younger kids who can be pretty tough
on their toys. I know that from experience. Plus, there is no contract or
commitment, so you can cancel at any time. Plus, there is no contract or commitment,
so you can cancel at any time.
KiwiCo is one of my absolute favorite kid brands.
I think it's so incredible because as a mom of two toddlers,
I know how fast we go through toys and you get one,
they play with it one time, they never do again.
But KiwiCo is something that they truly do go back to
and it's something that's teaching them
more than what they even realize.
They might be doing a little art project,
but there's some lesson in it
or some skill that will come back in later in life.
So this is an incredible gift to get for your kids over Christmas.
Also, if you're listening, you know, a mom or, you know, you're a grandparent
or you want to get it for this is like something to give as a gift to.
These are absolutely incredible gifts for your kids or to give to a mom that you know.
So Tinker, create and innovate with awesome gifts from KiwiCo. Get up to 50% off your first grade at Kiwico.com with the promo code
SadieRobb. That's up to 50% off your first grade at Kiwico.com with the promo code SadieRobb. You
don't want to miss this sale while it lasts. I feel like I'm such a type B, A mom.
Like I'm not an A mom.
I'm not a type B mom.
I'm like kind of somewhere in the middle
because I wanted to sleep train,
but I also didn't know when to start.
And some people tell you to start like week two.
I don't think I could have done that.
Like mentally, that is not for me.
But we were very loose with it.
Like I remember about three months in,
I'm still getting up every three hours and it was rough.
Like I could not sleep, but also Sadie,
I remember you telling me like sleep when the baby sleeps.
I couldn't do that.
I could not nap during the day
I was like not doing it. So nighttime was my only time. So I was like really struggling for sleep
And I remember going to my pediatrician and I was like she's still like waking up every three hours
And she was like how old is she like how?
Much does she weigh like asking all these questions and she was was like, she's trying to be in a routine.
And this is now a routine,
you getting up every three hours with her.
And I was like, oh, okay, so now I felt okay to start
sleep training.
And I remember she told me, she said,
three nights is really hard,
but you just gotta do it for three nights,
and then you'll be in the clear.
Let them cry it out.
Let them cry it out. Let them cry it out.
And I was not against crying out, not for,
like I didn't have a stance.
I know people are very opinionated.
Like babies cannot self-soothe.
People say like it's impossible for them to self-soothe
and I don't really stand by that.
I think babies can learn to do that.
So I was like, okay, I can do this for three nights
and I did it.
And truly that fourth night she slept three nights I can do this for three nights. And I did it. And truly that fourth night, she slept three nights.
Like it was exactly three nights.
How many months was it?
Four months.
We're at four month marks,
she was sleeping through the night.
But she was the same way as Haven,
like she could fall asleep anywhere.
So I am glad that we didn't start that till later on.
Because when you do like traditional sleep training,
it's like they are asleep by seven in their crib,
sound machine, dark room, very strict.
And we just, it didn't fit our lifestyle.
We want to be able to hang out with our friends
and stay up late and do things like that.
So when we do, we just put her down
and the pack and play at someone else's house.
Like we do that a lot at Sadie and Christian's.
And then we'll just wake her up when we're ready to go.
And she goes down so easy.
And she is like this, yeah, she's so, it's so great
that I feel like we did go fit our lifestyle.
We did a little bit of both and I'm so glad
because she does sleep great, but she's also very flexible.
In my opinion, that's so healthy because it's like,
when we're home, they do have a schedule.
It's not everyone's schedule, it's our schedule,
it works for us.
But like it's also flexible enough
to that when we need to do something else,
they are flexible.
And I think that's a gift.
I think looking back,
cause I wanna hear your thoughts, Maya too.
Looking back on like the early days and all that stuff,
someone actually did say like,
what would you tell yourself?
And I think this is what I did tell myself
going in with Haven as opposed opposed to what I did with Honey,
was just to enjoy it a lot more
and not try to put the pressure,
because you do go in hot the first time.
You're like, I'm gonna do this and I'm gonna do this
and we're gonna try that.
And then you're like, don't do that,
because it's like, what is even happening with my life
and everything's crazy.
And I think with Haven, I just let myself enjoy it.
I just kind of went with it. And so that way I'm not putting let myself enjoy it. I just kind of went with it.
And so that way I'm not like putting the pressure on it.
I can just wake up when we wake up,
go to sleep when I go to sleep.
And yes, it's hard and you cry and postpartum's postpartum,
but I enjoyed it so much more.
And you know, some of that was just the difference
of the two, but a lot of it was just the pressure
I put on myself with sleep training and stuff.
What about y'all?
We, Isaac and I are both night owls and we also have a crazy schedule. He's a coach,
so we have late games, you know, he coaches 30 minutes from here, so then there's another
drive to get back home. And then, you know, we serve at youth group on Wednesday nights,
like, you know, and then you just want to hang out with friends too. So we're both night
owls. We've're both night owls.
We've always been night owls.
And so there really has not been any sleep training for Mila.
She's also a night owl, loves being up.
And if she's tired, she'll go to sleep whenever she wants.
And so really she has the training, I guess you could say, quote unquote, that we do have
is that she lets me know when she is tired.
I can tell whenever it's a cry of,
I'm tired and I just want to be like,
laid down to go to sleep.
And so, and if I do that, she'll go straight to sleep.
And she loves it.
And so I think that's the quote unquote training
that we do have is that she knows to let me know
when she's tired and then she can go to bed
when she wants to.
But she is a night owl, but she's also a morning person.
Like if she does happen to wake up and it's like 3 a.m.,
I'll go in there to put, she likes to fake cry.
So that's the stage we're in right now.
That's funny, it's so soon.
Yeah, so soon, she'll let this fake cry out.
She just wants me to go in there
and put her pass back in her mouth.
So I put it back in her mouth,
and then she'll start laughing at me.
Like she's like, and it falls back out.
And she's just smiling, her legs are kicking,
and she's just laughing.
I'm like, it's 3 a.m., like it's not morning yet.
But she's like, yeah.
And then, you know, I wake her at Isaac,
my husband takes her to work,
so I usually get her up, or takes her to daycare
on his way to work.
And so she usually gets up at six.
And so like even though she stays up kind of late,
she still gets up at six, but is like,
happy as can be, loves it.
She pretty much knows when she's supposed to wake up too.
So, she, that's like the strength.
It's all about your baby, what they need,
what your family does.
And it's funny, because we're all kinda similar,
but then our sister-in-law, Mary Kate,
she is like, kids asleep by seven,
they're up by seven, like sleep training,
and it works so great for their family.
Would that work for me?
Because I don't want to get up at seven.
We are just now eating dinner at seven,
and no one's up at seven, but I am now.
I'm trying to do better at that, but not typically.
And I think it changed.
It works for them.
It changed too, because with Zane,
now he's in school, so we have to adjust
to that sleep schedule.
And also, it's like, it doesn't hurt to just try everything,
because I remember with Holland, I was so desperate.
I was like, I'll try anything.
Like, I'm not opposed to anything.
So I read everything different, took like sleepless, like consulting classes and all that.
So we tried different thing and see what work, you know?
And so really at that point, you just want to survive.
And you're like, okay, I'll try, you know,
and see which one stick.
Yep, do what works for you.
I know we're running out of time.
So I would just briefly mention this,
just for encouragement for all of you people listening.
So someone said, what to do if you're terrified
of pregnancy motherhood and motherhood,
but you've always wanted to be a mom. And I just
wanted to encourage you because one of my best friends, she was so scared to be a
mom and she was so scared to have a baby. Really she was scared of the
pregnancy part and the labor part and all that comes with it. And she is truly
one of the best moms I know now. I call her for mom advice all the time. And it's just amazing to see how she's really worked
through that fear.
And I remember her working through it
before she even got married.
This was before she even got married.
She would always just be like, I'm
so scared of being pregnant one day.
I'm so scared of being a mom.
And I remember her working through that in our friendship
before we even met our spouses.
And it's so cool now to see her married
and be such an incredible mom.
I learned so much from her.
And so like work those thoughts out with the Lord, you know,
no matter what stage you're in.
And also just, I hope you hear in us.
I think everybody's a little scared.
Everybody's overwhelmed.
Everybody's like not quite sure like, am I doing it right?
All the different things.
Like even in this conversation with some of my best friends
and sister, we're like, should I say that I co-slept?
Like, should I?
You know, cause you're nervous,
cause you don't want to do it wrong.
But I think even your heart's desire to do it right
just shows you're a good mom, you know?
Just even being willing to ask the questions,
have the conversations, pray the prayers.
And God really will equip you with everything you need
to be the mom that you are.
Like if he put the baby, knit the baby together
in your womb, then he made you a mom for a reason.
And so lean into him, let the spirit help you
be the mom that you are, and you're gonna do a great job,
and you're gonna need friends to ask questions to,
and you're gonna need the spirit every single day,
but that's just, that's what being a mom is, friend.
And so just want to encourage you, I hope just hearing our stories just let you take
a deep breath and know that you're not alone,
you're doing a great job.
And for those who don't have children yet,
but desire them, start praying into it now,
start asking questions.
It's so fun to listen to podcasts like this
and think about the mom that you're gonna be one day.
And yeah, we love doing these kinds of podcasts.
I'm glad we did a part two per usual.
Send in any questions if you want a follow up, because, you know,
I'm sure we'll have many more stories to tell.
But thank you guys.
You are amazing. And I learn from you every day. you