Why Won't You Date Me? with Nicole Byer - Finding the G-Spot (w/ Marc Rebillet)

Episode Date: April 9, 2021

Loop Daddy AKA Marc Rebillet Fucks. He and Nicole have a very horny chat about how he's enjoying his singledom, gaining the confidence to dominate submissive women, and why being brutally honest in a relationship will save you so much time. Plus, Nicole shares some self-loving tips she learned from her therapist. Black Lives Matter! For a list of resources and ways to help, check out blacklivesmatters.carrd.co. Follow Nicole Byer: Twitter: @nicolebyer Instagram: @nicolebyer Buy Merch: https://www.teepublic.com/stores/nicole-byer?ref_id=964 Order Nicole's book: www.indiebound.org/book/9781524850746

Why won't you date me? Why won't you date me? Why won't you date me? Please tell me why! Ooh, baby, welcome to another episode of Why Won't You Date Me, a podcast where me, Nicole Byer, tries to figure out how I'm still single, even though you could pull me by my nose and throw me across the room. I would still date you.

My guest today, ooh, he's known as Loop Daddy. It is Marc Rubier, who is a American French electronic musician known for his improvised electronic songs using a loop station. Hi, Mark. Hey, Nicole, how are you? I'm fabulous. Thank you so much for doing this. I mean, I'm not alone when I say I discovered you from your video. That was racism sucks. And I was like, oh, wow, this nice white man in underwear screaming racism sucks. I'm on board. I'm glad I could bring you into the fold that way.

That was that was a fun show, man. That was. Yeah. I mean, it's just one show of many where I'm screaming obscenities in my underwear. I fully like it. It's very funny. And then I watched, um,

you and Erica Badu. And it was just like, I felt like it was like two people on the same plane. Really? Just like fucking jamming and having just a really nice time. Dude, she blew my mind. I love that woman.

So God damn much. It's fucking cool. What's a loop station? I mean, it's basically this. I have it right next to me. It's this little piece of plastic that has like five different channels on it that you can use to record something and then layer on top of it other things and they all sort of sync together so you can like create full songs really quickly so it's the it's the thing that allows me to do what i do essentially i see and how did you figure out you wanted to use a loop station i'm truly i know nothing about music. Like not one thing. I'm tone deaf.

I don't know. I mean, you're asking the right questions. It's kind of a weird way to make music, but it's become a lot more popular recently because like people, I guess, are alone a lot more than they thought they would be. And it's a great way. Sounds weird. Don't understand. No, I'm around people all the time. Big crowds. Love them.

I've 10 people in the room with me right now. But yeah, it's like it's become a lot more popular recently, which is nice, I guess. But it's something that I learned about from Reggie Watts. Do you know that dude? Yes. I love Reggie. He is so wonderful. He is the best. He is just the best. And I watched him do his thing like years ago and basically watched him create these set. You know what I mean? He walks out on stage with no plan and just goes and riffs for like 90 minutes. And I saw that and had my mind blown. And basically that planted the seed and it took me a few years to sort of find my own whatever version of that. Um, but he is very much the impetus for, for all of that. And so, you know, I was like trying to produce music on my own as like a producer, just making beats and stuff for a long time. And after it's like pre Reggie and post Reggie and, um, yeah, now I'm very lucky to, uh, to call him a friend and he is just the coolest dude.

I often tell people who are like, how do I get into doing this creative thing I want to do? I'm like, find somebody that you like, do what they do until you figure out your own voice. Like there's no shame in like, you know, like just figuring shit out. Yeah, that's true. That's a good piece of advice actually. Cause it's like, you're going to need to like fuck up for a while anyway. So if you can just fuck up for a while while trying to do something you like admire yeah then you can sort of find your own way through that you know yeah my mother used to say well i was a bad little girl and she'd be like oh like you can't do anything to surprise me little girl you're not gonna invent the wheel and i was like what the fuck does that mean it just meant that she's like seen it all before like nothing i would do would surprise her she's like i mean i don't like that you did this but like you're not surprising me right she was a scary woman i was gonna say that's some odd motivation but like you know shit i don't know i feel like none of us can invent the fucking wheel anymore like everyone's done just about everything we can just do what we do if it happens to be interesting people will pay for it you know yeah what we do. If it happens to be interesting,

people will pay for it. You know? Yeah. Like how do you make it feel special? You have another song I like where you're just sitting in front of a nice window and you're like, let me suck on your titty. Or is it put my titty in your mouth? I've probably done both of those. It's just, it's funny. It makes me laugh really hard. it's funny it makes me laugh really hard thank you i do it because i i sometimes i just get stoned and i'll like get on get online and start streaming and start making shit up and whatever happens you know whether it's tits in my mouth or ass in my mouth or any number of body parts in my mouth that's usually where it goes i'm so jealous of people who can like smoke weed and be functioning. I'm like, if I smoke weed and then try to write a joke, when I come back to it, I'm like, oh boy, this doesn't make too much sense. And it's bad.

I kind of wonder, I get into these panicky modes when I'm high of like, is this good at all? But now I've done it enough where I can sort of trust myself to an extent. Yeah, I don't know. It's a weird feeling. It's a little nerve wracking, but I kind of like it because it allows me to relax a little bit more than I do when I'm not high and trying to make music. I can sort of like get into places and thoughts and grooves that i that i i wouldn't normally be able to access really i mean that makes sense i just

think i'm like a looney tune as a baseline so like like being relaxed is like well i'm now a relaxed looney tune what about this weird thing like i had surgery at this point, I don't know, a month ago. And my friend picked me up and she was real excited. Cause I was put under and she's like, Oh, I can't wait for these wacky things.

She's going to say when she wakes up. But I truly was just like, take me home. I must go home. I was just like disgruntled, not entertaining at all. No, not entertaining.

Not like being loopy, being like, I love my family. Like what you've seen those videos. It was just like opposite i was like take me home i can't be here anymore and someone get me the fuck out of here truly this like old woman was next to me talking but i couldn't see her and i was like i'll kill her she's old and i'll kill her i hate her i was just like i don't want to hear anything i need to leave how you feeling how was the how did the surgery go um it went well i have two screws in my ankle holy shit yeah i fell down the stairs it was um oh really jarring i was

walking and then i was on the floor and i was like oh no this seems bad and like my foot was on backwards and then my roommate was too calm and that's when i was like this bad and then the emts were pretty interesting it was the whole thing oh my god i'm glad you're okay jesus me fucking too but it's been a journey can walk and shit you're good i've got a boot on so i can't walk on it yet he was like i'll let you have a boot so you can shower because i was like i miss bathing and wearing this weird thing over the cast is hard i just complained enough and he's like i'll let you have a boot so you can shower because i was like i miss bathing and wearing this weird thing over the cast it's hard i just complained enough and he's like fine you can have a boot just don't walk on it and i was like okay thank you damn dude that's crazy fuck yeah fucking sucks have you ever broken anything i have i got uh my foot too actually

my i was like biking around this was years ago at this point, but I was biking around Brooklyn. I think I was on my way to work. And this 18-wheeler cut me off. Oh, no. And they flipped the handlebar of my bike. I went under the bed of the truck and it like crushed my foot. Oh, fuck. Yeah.

It just like shattered my entire foot and uh i don't know by some miracle i was on crutches for a few months which sucks in new york um oh yeah fuck the subway yeah god yeah nightmare nightmare shit especially when you're like broke yeah i think i would just like cry dude it was because like there is no other option you have to take the train there's a hundred stairs to get like i lived at 125th and broadway so like there it was like oh like literally a hundred stairs to get up there because it's like above ground oh my god that like i would just and then i lived in a six floor walk up oh god oh i would truly be like i guess guess I leave. I don't live here anymore.

Yeah. Right. Either that or you just sit in your apartment and die. Yeah. When I lived in New York, I fell down a flight of stairs because I was drunk. Thank you. And I truly was just like limping for like a full six months because I didn't have insurance. So I didn't go to the doctor and I was like, I'll be fine. Just letting it heal the natural way. Yeah. And then I worked at a clothing store and they were like, when are you going to start wearing dress shoes again? And I was like, when I fucking heal or if you pay me more so I can see a doctor. Dude, you got to do what you got to do when shit, you know, it's like when you don't have an option, you just have to like let your body do its take its course i guess and like hope that it's okay yeah it sucks when you

don't have money but i feel like when we're when we're like 60 we're gonna face the the consequences of all this shit you know yeah your body's gonna be like no i don't want to do anything else anymore you treat me very poorly. Why did you do this? Where do you live, Mark? Do you live in New York? I live in beautiful downtown Manhattan. Oh, that's so nice. I miss New York so dang much.

Oh, we miss you. Come back. Where are you? Are you in LA? Oh, Mark, thank you. Yeah, I live in LA. Oh, get the fuck back here. I miss it.

I miss it. How long have you lived in New York? Are you born and raised? No, not born and raised. Unfortunately, I'd love to be able to say I am, but I'm not. Just lie to people. I'm from Dallas. I should.

Yeah, man. My whole life. Whole life. You know I'm a- I mean, by the time this comes out, it'll be old news, but Alec Baldwin's wife was lying about being from Spain. Have you seen that? What? It's a fun story. So people did a real deep dive. be old news but alec baldwin's wife was lying about being from spain have you seen that what it's a fun story so it's like people did a real deep dive she like uh there's a fun video of her

being like she's cooking something she's like we have tomatoes here and how you say in english and the lady's like cucumber she's like cucumber so she's she's which makes me laugh so hard that she's like pretending to have a Spanish accent and then be like, how you say, Oh my, Oh my God. I don't know the validity of anything other than like, she was born in Boston. She's not from Spain.

Her parents were born in Boston. Her dad was like a literal pilgrim or not her dad, her like dad's ancestors. Uh, and then I think she like deleted her social media, but maybe she's back now. Dude. What drives this?

Like, wasn't there that guy who was on like, wasn't it the guy? I forget what his name was. It was on The League or he was on some show like that, Workaholics or something, that he lied about being in 9-11. Steve Ranazansky. I think I'm saying his last name incorrectly, which is a fun thing I like to do. You know what? He deserves it. No.

Yeah. He lied about being a 9-11. And his story is kind of wild because I read this article where he was like, yeah, I was talking to my friends. Everyone was sharing stories. And then I said one thing and then it snowballed. And I was like, I mean, at one point you should have been like, I just wasn't there. You don't have to tell a story.

It's just like, hey, can I say something? I just, I don't know why I a story it's just like hey can i say something i just i don't know why i did this i wasn't there i was not at this and i wasn't there it's just that's very bizarre it's i think it might be something in your i don't know there was a lady who also lied about being in 9-11 and she was also the president of like the 9-11 survivors club i don't know if i heard about her yet but it's like a thing you know a little book club you come you read your books and you're like we're survivors 9-11 fan club hey but yeah i don't it's so wild i don't think i've ever lied about being at a tragedy it seems bad i feel like it's this desire to like it feels like it's it's probably this broken desire to like relate

or to feel like like you have this impulse to like want to tell a story or something but it's just i don't understand what goes like it goes from that thought to like saying it and then continuing to lie about it yeah and like just repeating the story over and over. It's kind of like that kid in your class where you're like, I went to Jamaica on vacation. They're like, me too. And it's like, you did. And they're like, um, yeah, we went to Jamaica and visited Tokyo, Tokyo, Jamaica. And you're like, what?

No, that's not a thing. That's not, that's not anything. Not a thing at all. Yeah. And it's like, especially you're a public figure. It's like, you're good. People are going to find out. Yeah. People can's like, especially you're a public figure. It's like, you're good. People are going to find out. Yeah.

People can connect the dots. So she's just not Spanish at all. She's a Bostonian. But she speaks Spanish. So I think she like maybe vacations in Spain and just like really liked it. It was like, I'm going to be Spanish. She also has been on the cover of Hola magazine twice.

It's like, Oh my God. It's like so insane and then her kids all have these like like uh like uh rodrigo or luciano but then they're like blonde hair and blue eyes and i'm like this is and i know i know you can be his or not hispanic you can be spanish from sp, like a Spaniard with blonde hair and blue eyes. But it's just so funny that she was like, we're going to go real deep into this. Let's just lean into this. The kids, the magazine shoots. Wow.

It's like Rachel Dolezal. She like, I like stumbled upon her hair braiding Instagram. And I was like, so yeah, she's still, she's still braiding hair. She's still Rachel Dolezal. Like my god keep doing the damn thing girl oh people let's just chill the fuck out Mark this is a dating podcast so I'm gonna ask about your dating life is that okay oh ask all task all over it and under it and around it. Okay. So are you single taken? Um, yep. I think those are the two options. Those are the two. I am deeply single. Oh, are you sad about it or happy about it? Those are the two options. There is no in between. Are you devastated? Are you ecstatic?

Let's go. No, I mean, I'm very content, I would say, in my singledom. I'm using my singledom and enjoying my singledom. Ah, I can read between the lines. You'll be fucking. We fucking. between the lines you'll be fucking we fucking uh so like when you tour obviously people like throw themselves at you how exciting is that i i don't know that life never not one person has ever been like please like show me their titties or like shit thrown underwear at me bullshit that you have got to have some shit like that no i don't really have chuckle fuckers every

now and again i'll have a couple be like would you like to be our third and they're like shaped like potatoes i'm like i don't this is not for me no thank you shape like i'm sorry i don't have a potato fetish i'm sorry um i mean yeah it is a very bizarre thing it's it's a bizarre thing because obviously it's like a fairly new thing for me to be first of all it's it's a weird thing for a dude to be hit on. You know what I mean? It's just not something that dudes, at least to my knowledge, get to experience very often. It's like just being sort of unabashedly hit on. and because I found myself in this line of work and because I tend to be half naked at my shows and they're very, they're just hyper sexual shows. That's sort of the way it's gone. And I mean, I don't, it, yeah, it, it feels good. I mean, it feels good. It feels great. It's nice to be wanted. It's nice to be desired, I guess.

You know, it's it's a dope sensation. Yeah. I mean, it sounds very fun. I watched a video where a lady was like on someone's shoulders and she just had like free titties out to you. And I was like, wow, what a damn treat to like be in the midst of a song and like open your eyes and be like, oh, titties. It is a beautiful thing.

I wish it on anybody and everybody who wants that. I wish you that. I wish you tits in your face on demand. That's a nice wish. What a treat. Just tits on demand. May that be everyone's New Year's resolution. I know this is coming out.

It's February right now, but let's rewind a couple months. And I just wish that retroactively for everybody. I think that's a really generous thing of you. Like you're just like really giving. That's just so nice of you. Look, it's the least I could do.

That's my charity. No, but it's not charity that you can write off with your taxes. God damn it, you're right. Got to find a way to monetize this. Always find a way to monetize. Are you on the apps at all or no? I am on the apps, yes. Do you get recognized a lot on the apps?

Here and there. I do here and there hinge. Mostly Tinder has sort of fallen away because I don't know why, but I just don't find a lot of, I don't match a lot on Tinder. I don't know why. I just, it's not good to me for whatever reason. It's not good to me either. And I don't know why. Yeah.

I just like. What's going on with that And I don't know why. Yeah. I just like. What's going on with that? I don't know. I swipe and I'm like, I don't. Me personally, I don't see anybody that I want to match with. Right. And I'll swipe for like a very long time and be like, well, I guess I'll just use the other apps that I have more success with. Yeah.

I have so many of them. Let me ask you, do you, have you ever tried Raya? I have tried Raya. Raya is a point of them. Let me ask you, have you ever tried Raya? I have tried Raya. Raya is a point of contention for me. They waitlisted me for two years. And the only people I see are like Australian DJs. And guess what? That's too far.

I can't suck your dick if you're in Australia. That's true. That's a very good point, Nicole. It's a long playwright for dick that I don't know about. Yes. Imagine getting on a fucking Delta flight for 16 hours and be like, I don't know about you know yes imagine getting on a fucking delta flight for 16 hours to be like i don't know this might be really great dick it's a huge commitment that's a huge commitment for a little bit of dick i mean yeah i've been reticent i just have been a

little hesitant to try it out because i don't know if like those are the kind of I don't know if I want to be like matching with like social media people you know I just don't I just feel like I just regular people is fine like regular as people that's kind of what I'm interested in I just

people who are living their lives and are down you know like I don't it just feels weird to like, let's all get to, let's all these like public figures get together. And like, I don't know. It's just seems bizarre to me.

I think maybe the thought is like dating somebody who understands what you do, but I think it's like rather simple to explain to somebody that like I travel a lot and perform. Are you in or are you out? Yeah. Yeah. I mean, I feel like it's not a huge deal, but I do, I guess I see the point of that. Like if it's, if it's about findings, I guess where I'm, where I get caught up is I'm not really looking to date. So it's not, I guess that's not really much of a concern. And so it's not, I guess that's not really much of a concern.

I mean, I guess you could just like put it out there. Just like put on your dating profile. Like I'm only here to fuck and that's it. You stupid bitch. I'm kidding. I'm going to match like crazy. Honestly, you absolutely would. Because there's a lot of women with a lot of daddy issues that are like, you can call me a stupid bitch.

So like, I think I'm in oh god you know that is something that i have found out through this last couple years where i've been you know exposed to more women i suppose you could say say is is like the people like getting they they like they like being talked like people like getting fucked up basically like there's a lot of subs out there is what i'm trying to say oh yeah there's a lot of people who like getting choked who like getting you know talked to spit all this shit that like i never would have thought And at first I really wasn't down. Like I was like, what? I don't,

how do I do this? Is this, am I, is this good? And you just sort of like figure out, but ultimately it's like, if it's turning you on, I'm turned on by that.

Like I'm turned on that you're turned on, you know, you know, I wouldn't choose to like put my hands around your throat if that's what you want and it's hot i'll do it i've never thought of it from that aspect to be like because i don't mind being choked i'm actually i love it and you're like choke me and sometimes i've had men be like huh okay and i've never thought of it by like someone saying to me,

joke me. And you're like, Oh, uh, um, okay. I guess I kill you now. Yeah.

Yeah. You have to figure it out. Like there's no training manual for this. It's like, I just had to like figure out how to choke somebody without hurting them. Or, you know, it's like you gotta,

you gotta work it out. I don't know. It's like, you gotta, you gotta work it out. I don't know. It's weird, but now I enjoy it. Very funny. Now it's, now it's hot. I don't know if I could have someone spit on me.

I think I'd be like, Oh, Oh, droplets. Yeah, I did. I, what are you,

what is this moisture? What is this? Is it raining in here? Get out of here. What is this? I don't like personally, like I don't, I don't really like being hurt or choked or spit on. But, you know, I'm happy to do it to you.

I'm more than happy. Whatever you need, you know, whatever you need to get you there. See, again, very giving. I love this. That's part of it. You got to dance, you know. It's like feel each other out. What do you want? What do I want? Figure it out. Yeah, I like this. That's part of it. You got to dance. You know, it's like feel each other out. What do you want?

What do I want? Figure it out. Yeah, I like that. I feel like a lot of people don't talk about that. Like you have to ask for what you want. You can't just assume somebody will slap you and push you off the bed and kick you in the face if that's what you want. Dude, totally.

Talk to each other. Yes. Talk. There's nothing wrong with that. It's like, I would. Okay. I guess I'll talk about it.

I was, I was hanging out with this chick and she was like, I was like eating her out. And she told me, she was like, yo, take some of this lube and like, keep eating me out.

But I'm eating her out and I've got a finger inside of her too. You're doing both. You got to work. You're working the clit inside there. Yes. This is good. Ladies, tell your men that's what you like. Yes.

There's no men who listen to my podcast. No man's going to be like, ah, okay, that's what I do. Taking notes. Like, ah, okay, that's what I do. Taking notes, you know what I mean? But she told me, she was like, yo, while you're in there, like, push up. She's like, push up, find that thing, and then work it back and forth, and push up while you do it. I had never done that before.

So I started eating around and pushing up, and it was like fucking coming and doing i was like wow dude and she all she did was explain it to me uh-huh and it was simple yes and now i know what to do it's so funny though because i didn't realize that was like the g spot until someone did it to me and i was like what did you just and i literally was like what did you just do like i think he like looked at me and i was like you're I want to be like you're not in trouble but I was like I don't have words right now what did you just do and he like explained and I was like ah yes I keep that with me and now I tell the other people how to do that yes you pass on the information like it's a sacred holy grail of pleasure yes because that's the thing it's like this it's like once you have

it and especially if you learn it like during then it's like it's embedded in your brain forever and now you have that and that's a beautiful thing we should share that we should you know i don't know what a nice gift i'm so fucking horny i mean it's bad it's bad tell me about it what's going on it needs to end i don't like it how have you been i mean what have you have you been making any concessions have you been seeing people on the side what's what's going on no because i have to work and then i just refuse to be the person who gets covid that shuts down a set and then people don't get their money or like, I don't know if networks are paying if production shut.

I was like, I just don't want to be that person. Yeah. I feel you. I feel you. So I've just been like, kind of like responsible and lame. And then I can't walk.

And I'm like, what am I going to like hobble to somebody's house and be like, disregard the boot and fuck me. You know, someone is turned on by that. I know. Someone's like, Ooh, you on by that. Oh, I know. Someone's like, ooh, you got a boot? Ooh, okay.

Let me stick my dick in your boot. And it's like, no, me. Me. Let me just slide my dick right in there. That would make me laugh so hard. That would be fun. That would be a fun little bit of foreplay. It really would so you're like it's like you're on set so you can't really be you can't be skirting around the rules or anything

i mean i guess i could if i was just like here wear a mask we're both wearing masks or like we both get tested i'm just like that's a lot of work and i'm sure like other people are just you know out there doing whatever i just i refuse to be that person yeah no i mean i i totally understand it was like did you see that um or hear that footage of tom cruise freaking out which honestly i fully support that shit like the dude owns this franchise he's like responsible for the jobs of i don't know how many fucking people thousands of people because you have post-production pre-production during the production it's a lot of fucking people who are counting on that bag because the government's not giving them shit right exactly and i'm sure he probably talked

to them once before and here they are again and he just just like flips it. So I get it. I get it. I mean, when there's like other people riding on you and your responsibility, I would do that too. I'm lucky not to have too much of that. It'd be so nice if I was just independently doing things and I could just, you know, get out there and get my pussy dipped in

it's devastating like honestly i truly i've been tweeting about it i'm like please just like wear a mask so i can fuck in 2021 like just if you're gonna do it for anybody do it for me i am wishing you wetness and orgasms and fucking and I'm just wishing that on you and I hope you know we got to get to this let's get the fucking vaccine out let's get it all I'm getting five I don't care I'm getting it all at first I was like maybe I'll wait and I was like no now I want it now give it to me now put it in my little butt truly Put it in my little butt. Truly. I don't care. I don't care if I grow horns. I don't care.

I can get a weave to cover the horns. I do not care. Just give it to me. Give it to me now so that we can all fucking peace. Yes. Oh, but I am really excited for when everybody has it because I think everyone's going to be loose and just fucking everybody. Yes. I have been saying this. I feel like when, you know, it's going to take a second, obviously, like first, you know, there's the rounds of vaccination.

So it's like the at risk, the elderly, whatever. And then finally it gets to us. And then so maybe it's like August, September, you know, things start sort of returning to some sort of normalcy i think once that happens and like festivals are going on and indoor dining and all this shit it's gonna be like a renaissance yeah i think it's gonna be like the 70s yes you know like everyone is just gonna lose it it's gonna be like fucking in the street uh-huh i can't wait to fuck somebody just on the 405 freeway just like pull my car over and be like get out let's do this and everyone's like yes that's what i want their horns yeah nobody's mad about it they're like you're getting it done it's really gonna be amazing i think it's gonna be like a new revolution kind of shit where it's like,

I don't know. We've all been pent up for so long and this sucks so much. Yeah. We just need a little bit of freedom, a little bit of love. I don't know, man. I'm pumped about it. Me too. Real quick. We got to take a break. gotta take a break and we're back hey oh boy real horny talk oh boy man i'm feeling it i'm feeling it i love horny talk i don't get to talk like this with too many people you know there's some of my friends are like in relationships and generally don't like talking explicitly about sex all that much and i really love talking about it i don't know it's i just don't have all that many people i think it's a beautiful thing and it brings me joy and i think that's why i like talking about it so much but it is like funny when something i can feel a friend be like okay nicole let's i don't

need to know every single detail and i'm like but i'm going to keep going i will give you every single my poor friends this year has heard me talk about everyone I've ever fucked in like very, very, very just like great detail. And she'll, she's so good. She'll just listen. And she's been in a relationship for so long. Oh, really? Yeah. But she, I think she's just like, well, I signed up to be her best friend. So this is what it is. Comes with territory mm-hmm yeah I mean that's nice to have a friend like that I have one friend who I can talk about my exploits you know with

and but but I always just feel like I don't want to wear them out or be like I don't want to be too much and but I want I need a someone I gotta talk I like talking about this it's interesting it's like a big part of my life and it's a big part of everybody's life you know yeah and i feel like

people like to pretend that it's not but i'm like they do and so some people it's not a big part of their life like some people are just not into it and it's like okay that's you but like come on you be fucking or at least you be thinking about fuck yes you be thinking yes i would love for i haven't had a married friend do this but i would love for them to be like my husband blew my back out so hard last night i was like i will marry you again like i want my married friends to like talk to me like that and they don't i would love to hear that like tell me about your fucking dude i yes i that's what i wanted i i love hearing about it it makes me happy it's like damn i yeah there's just a stigma that's been it's just a big stigma around it and has been for a long long time and i just think it's hard to find people who are super comfortable discussing it openly. But my dad was, you know, rest in peace, my dude.

But he was extremely French and always super open about sexuality and everything surrounding that for like my whole life. So it's just something that I enjoy talking about. And it also gives me a tickle because people don't like talking about it it's like fun to push that a little bit you know yes yeah i fully agree like whenever someone makes a face i'm like oh i got you i guess i say more things yes is your dad or was your dad he's passed he's passed on he's passed on my papa he dead too so was your dad from france moved here yeah no he's from paris like uh just as french as it gets you know big thick cartoonish accent and uh just a big flirt i mean he was married to my mom for like oh god

he was married to my mom for like, Oh God, 48 years. Like until he died, but he just loved flirting. He was a big flirt. And like, he loved asking people about their sex lives. He would have been a great guest on this podcast.

And he just loved that. He loved sort of making people uncomfortable, but he didn't, he did it in a way that was charming in only the way that like a french dude could do you know yeah it was great and it just sort of you know he was always like mark you you have to you know you have to explore you have to find try this and that and you, you never know if you try, it's like if you eat steak all your life, you don't know about the other food. You have to try all the

other food. You're like, you know, you have to pollinate all the flowers, give it a shot, try this, try that. And so, yeah, you know, he did a lot of that, I think before he married my mom. He always wanted me to do the same so look i am just trying to make my dad proud i honestly wish more people would embrace that be like i'm just trying to make my dad proud and i'm fucking everybody okay leave me alone lay off all right is your mother still is your mother french or no she is not she is from south carolina she's like a sweet she's like polar opposite of him gentle sweet southern bell adorable wonderful woman i love the shit out of her uh but she's just not i can't really talk about that stuff

with her you know because i mean i could but she wouldn't want to hear it. So she's like, please stop telling me what you do with your dick. You're my son. Which I mean, I get I get that, you know, how did they meet? Was she in France or did he move here and they met? She was in France. She went to Paris on like a trip with I think her sister and her best friend at the time. And it was like the late sixties and they were doing like Europe on $5 a day or something, you know, it was like, um, because I guess you could do that. You could like, you could like live for a inflation and capitalism. You could, you know, enjoy your life and live as a reasonable human would be expected to do. Can't do that anymore. But anyway, she was over there and yeah, they were at like Place de l'Opéra or something.

And my dad pulled her out in a car and she asked him for a cigarette. And he said, I have a cigarette if I can take you to dinner. And then they walked around paris and like kissed over the sun river oh boy it was a whole thing you know it was a whole romantic bullshit yeah what a fucking treat what a dream yeah that's so nice well let me ask you are you i mean where are you at are you like are you just trying to fuck or like are you looking for something more so i was just trying to fuck up until uh i would say november december of 2019 and i was like i think i honestly if i'm gonna be real like fully fucking real i want a relationship and then the beginning of 2020 was real good things were happening the

covid hit then the person i was seeing said goodbye oh no yeah like it went fully the opposite i feel like a lot of people were like great we'll quarantine together we'll get married we'll have a baby this is great we love it uh and it just didn't go that way for me dude that sucks yeah it does but also like i don't want like a pen pal i don't think i like want to talk to anyone on the apps until i can like meet you in person right granted i guessanted, I guess I could, but I'm like, who wants to see a woman crutch up to them and be like, hello, you catch me if I fall down and trip over a curb. Yeah.

So. Damn. So it's kind of on pause right now, I guess. Yeah. It's definitely on pause for now. Yeah. I think I'm just going to pause it until the summer.

I think when the summer hits, if the vaccine isn't readily available i'm gonna say fuck it and go find some like lady glory holes and like fuck somebody maybe like ask people to wear a hazmat suit i don't know like i'm just gonna be like do it let's fucking fucking do it i mean shit for now just a lot of rubbing it out and you know fantasizing yeah. Yeah. Right. To the point where I was like, I don't know. I don't. This is not doing it anymore.

It loses its luster a little bit after a while. It truly does. And I like I've retired my little Hitachi magic wand for now. It got to the point where I was like jackhammering my fucking clit off. And I was like, I am like sore. I can't do this to myself anymore. You know, it's true. Just need a little human touch.

We just need a little therapist says she's like everything you're going through is because of lack of touch. She's like everybody like humans crave touch it is like a very deep part of us even people who don't like to actually be touched they like crave being near people and i don't know somebody might be like that's not me whatever but this is what my therapist says and i didn't realize until she like has me she's like when you get really sad or like really frustrated, just like rub your arms. And I've been doing that. And I'm like, oh, my God.

Does it help? Yes. It helps a little bit. It like calms me down a little bit. And it like feels nice. It feels like I'm like hugging myself and being kind to myself. That's nice. Yeah, you're doing it right now.

Yeah, I'm doing it. It's nice. You just like, yeah, you just kind of like hold yourself and you're doing it right now yeah i'm doing it yeah it's nice you just like yeah you just kind of like hold yourself and you're like with you especially if like your hands are warm and yeah it feels very comforting yeah you just give yourself a little hug that's nice and then uh i have a friend who's in my little bubble. I will demand hugs from her. So sheer. I was just like, excuse me. During like, we went to like a protest. This is in May, I think.

And we hadn't hugged because we were like scared of each other. And I just like forgot and like hugged her. And then I went, oh, no, I hugged you. She was like, we're both wearing masks. You're fine. I was like, we're both wearing masks. You're, you're fine. There was a whole period where it was really like, I mean, everyone like cut.

I mean, I just like, didn't see a single human soul for like well over a month. And then there was that little adjustment period where it was like, okay, we need to like pick who we can and can't see. And then we see them, but it's at a distance. And then maybe you get a little bit closer and then there's a bit.

And now there's people in my life who I see regularly, but it was really weird, like stepping back into that. Yeah, it was very, very bizarre. And I agree. So like I have two roommates. Do you live alone? Yeah, I live alone. very bizarre. And I agree. So like I have two roommates. Do you live alone? Yeah, I live alone. Do you like living alone? I love it.

Oh, I don't think I could do it. Really? Why not? Because I really love telling people my thoughts. Well, I mean, you have a podcast, you know. I do. I do have a podcast. But like I only record like on one day a week so like

i get all my talking out for the podcast and then i'm like in my house like so i can't really like i can move around i have crutches or whatever but if uh the nice man who lives with me if he's like upstairs i'll be like oh i have something to tell him and i'll literally call him and be like, can you come downstairs so I can talk at you? That's amazing. Yeah. Well, I mean, maybe a roommate situation is better for you, you know?

Yeah. I think some people are built to like live with people forever and some people can like, my sister lives alone and she loves it. Yeah. Yeah. I think it's just, it's like a,

it's to each his own sort of thing. Like I, I'm an only child. And so I'm sure that has a lot to do with it. You know, I just like I enjoy entertaining myself. I enjoy knowing that there's no one else here and being able to like do things on my own watch without really having to think about how it affects someone else that's here. I've been in plenty of roommate situations and I don't really, I don't mind it. And I liked it in some cases, but I definitely, I mean, if I had to choose a hundred percent of the time, I'd be alone for

sure. Yeah. Can't do it. I just love people. I do too. But like in doses, I guess. I don't know. I love people when I want to love people. When I want to. Sure, I mean, that makes sense. I'm very lucky to have like a place where I have two floors. So it's like, we're not in each other's faces all day long. Oh, that's great.

So like, it's very nice. We spend like the day separate in separate rooms working. Maybe I see you in the kitchen, maybe I don't. And then at night we'll watch you know tv or whatever yeah oh that's that's really nice i see that's something i could probably do i could probably be cool with that yeah if i was like in i think about like my old apartment in new york which was a five or four bedroom one bathroom being quarantined there i think i would literally jump out the window i'd be like i can't do it i'm exactly i've done that too i used to live in bushwick with four ladies and we had one bathroom and it's just like oh boy you probably saw a lot of shit

you're like why is there so much hair on the wall is this what it's like women are disgusting like like fully fucking nasty sometimes i mean i didn't want to say it but yeah yeah a little no like absolutely gross like i've been to many of public restrooms i've been like you left your blood here like do i have to like chase you to come get your fucking blood i was at the airport once and this lady was coming out of the bathroom i was going in and there was just like piss all over the toilet seat and i was like you have to clean that she was like excuse me and i was like you have to and she was she knew exactly what i was talking about and she truly like very quickly turned around because she didn't want me to scream at her you pissed on the toilet seat i

don't want to clean up your piss clean Clean it up. Seriously. Just like all over the fucking thing. It was so rude. And I was like, I know you're hovering, but like, I don't know, aim it a little bit better. By the way, how does aiming work for women? How does that, how does the aiming thing work? So I think it's like where you hover over, you just kind of like back it up a little bit and then just like aim it to like the middle of the toilet bowl okay yeah i mean obviously we have like a you know we just can fucking point it yeah you can just hold it and pee i just sit on fucking toilet seats i i use wet wipes i wipe it with like a wet wipe and i'm like i think that's fine i do the same thing i don't care it's my butt you know whatever. I'm going to fucking wash it.

If someone's going to eat it later, it probably will have a shower in between. Exactly. For now, it's my goddamned butt. Okay. It doesn't wipe the shit off and have a seat. You know? Yeah. Not a big deal.

There's worse things in the world to worry about than, because like, I don't think you can get anything from a toilet seat. I mean, can your butt, is it going to be your butt gets something? I don't know. It's like, it's my butt. Is there butt sickness? Uh-oh. I'm now Googling, is there butt sickness?

What a very serious butt infection. The FBI is going to be like, arrest her. Let's see. Oh, my God. There is a butt sickness. It's called dead butt syndrome. Wait. Wait, what?

Wait a second. Can you just say what? It's called dead butt syndrome, DBS. If you spend hours a day sitting and not standing up you may have experienced a problem commonly known as dead butt syndrome dbs the clinical term is gluteus medius tendinopathy and it's also known as gluteal amnesia. Dead butt. Honestly, when I googled it, I didn't expect anything to come up, but that's the best case scenario. That is so fucking

good. Oh man, I got a case of the DBSs. Dude, I've got this crazy dead butt. It's just, but that's like, so you just don't want to sit on the toilet for too long yeah right yeah otherwise you'll get dbs otherwise you don't want dbs no that has nothing to do with what's on the seat no you just don't want you know uh dead gluteus maximus or whatever

it's called gluteal amnesia you don't want don't want to watch Dr. Zhivago on the toilet. If you're watching Lawrence of Arabia on the toilet, you'll probably get dead butt. Yeah, you got to get up. You got to get up. Okay, Mark, I ask all of my guests this. Would you date me? Hell yeah. Well, no, hold on, hold on, hold on.

Let me rephrase. Let me rephrase. I wouldn't date anybody okay but we'd fuck for sure hell yeah i had to rephrase i don't want to see because the thing is like i i have learned this really, like honesty lesson in the last, in the last two or three years when it comes to like being with people and seeing people and any doing anything with anybody is like, it's so much easier to just be brutally honest than to say something that will make someone happy. You know what I mean? Like it just cuts out so much bullshit, so much time wasted, so much energy wasted to just say how you feel. And if it sucks, it sucks, but it was going to suck anyway, because you feel that way. So just get to it say it and let it be what it will be you know so yeah that's what i would say i wouldn't date you but not

because it's you it's because i wouldn't date anybody hell yeah also valuable that's what my therapist says whenever i tell her because uh after the last year i dated i was like mary i will die before i tell another man how i feel and she was like nicole no she was like if it's if it's gonna end it's going to end you're just like prolonging it so why not just say what you want say what you need and then if that person doesn't want to give it to you you can just move the fuck on that's so true right that is 24 karat gold it's like yeah it's it's it's just such a valuable lesson to try and like integrate into your life because like fuck man the amount of time that i have wasted in the past like feeling a certain way but not saying it because i didn't want to hurt someone or because I just

wasn't, I didn't feel, uh, safer or, or, or ready to say it. If I had just said the shit, I would have saved both of us so much time and so much anguish and so much.

So, yeah, I don't know. I just feel very strongly about that. Just say, you know, I think more people should not be worried about hurting someone's feelings. Cause it's like,

Oh, you might hurt their feelings or you might not. They might just go, Oh, thank God. They told me after two dates that they, they aren't looking for a relationship. So now we can make a choice to keep fucking or not ever again.

And now it's like, Oh, I have a choice to make as opposed to like, it's just going on. And you're like, I don't know where this is. It's like in this weird fucking limbo. Dude, that is exactly what I just had this conversation with a girl that I'm seeing that I've probably seen. I've seen more than I've really like seen anyone else in a long time.

I've just seen her like more times than I've seen anyone else in a long time. I've just seen her like more times than I've seen anyone else in a while. And so I felt like it was like, I needed to express to her that like, you know, I didn't want to mislead her or mischaracterize what this is or how I feel about this. Like I enjoy, so I basically, I, you know, I just said that straight up. I was just like, look, obviously I like seeing you. I like you. We are enjoying each other and enjoying each other's bodies and all of that. And it's fun, but like, I just need to be perfectly honest and let you know that this,

that like, this is about as far as I can take it. You know, like I cannot in good faith lead you to believe that I am capable of giving you anything more than this. So if you're cool with that, great. And if not, now, you know,

and we can like do something about it, but she was totally cool with it and totally understanding and like felt the same way. So, but we just said it. And it's just nice to know that you're on the same page. Yes. It's such a relief. I don't know. I love that. That's a good lesson. I like it too. Yeah. Well, Mark, we've come to the end. Thank you so much for doing this. Do you have anything you want to promote? I don't have a goddamn thing I want to promote what i'd like to have a youtube

channel oh yeah that's right i do yeah nope nothing no no bye we just i just passed a million subscribers on my youtube channel congrats thank you it was a took a long ass fucking time but um yeah it's uh it's the same as all my socials everywhere. It's my name. No punctuation. All lower is just my name. Mark Rebillet. M-A-R-C-R-E-B-I-L-L-E-T. That's where I'm at everywhere. I don't really have anything too exciting coming up that I can talk about. So I'm just chilling and making shit up and really, really happy to have been able to do this with you, Nicole. I appreciate you. Yes. Thank you. That means Mark has things coming up that are going to be so exciting because he can't talk about it.

So stay the fuck tuned. Follow his fucking socials. It's going to be lit. I'm like, what is this? I'm now your hype woman. I'm like, you got to. Well, if you like this episode of Why Won't You Date Me, you'm like, you got to. Well, if you like this episode of why won't you date me, you can like it, rate it, subscribe, write something nasty to me and I will read it on the air or on the

episode. This person wrote to me and said, girl, I want to eat that booty up. Let you hold, wait, let you fart in my mouth and hold it like a bong rip. Wait,

do I have to hold the fart? Oh, no, you're going to hold the fart. Okay, I'm on board. I just don't want to hold a fart. That seems bad. It's not for me. Oh, you know what? If I could promote something to you, since you've got that ass, I would suggest one of my songs.

I don't know if you've heard it or not, but it's called Work That Ass for Daddy. Oh, I don't think I've heard it. That's definitely one for you. You should check that out. Okay. Thank you. My pleasure. I will.

Okay. Bye-bye. Bye, Nicole. That's it for Why Won't You Date Me? With me, Nicole Byer. Why Won't You Date Me? is produced and engineered by, oh, the sweetest woman I know, Marissa Melnick. It is executive produced by other wonderful people, Adam Sachs, Joanna Solo-Taroff, and Jeff Ross. Thanks for listening.

I love you. Thank you so much. We'll be seeing you next Friday with a brand new episode. What a dream. What a dream. Ha, ha ha ha. This has been a Team Coco production.