Why Won't You Date Me? with Nicole Byer - Oops, All Red Flags! (w/ Mariah Smith)

Episode Date: March 21, 2025

Comedian and writer Mariah Smith (Smith Sisters Live) joins Nicole to share some truly wild dating stories, including a guy who got horny discussing Black Lives Matter, and another who cried about his ex on the first date. She talks about her experience using an Instagram matchmaking service, and dishes out a hot tip for boosting your matches on dating apps. Plus, they try to settle the great iPhone vs. Android green bubble debate, and open up about their experiences losing over 100 lbs with Mounjaro.Watch this episode on YouTube to see our cute outfits! https://youtu.be/tU8d4azX5fIWrite to Nicole! Send your dirty messages to [e-mail] with the subject line "Dirty Message" and Nicole may read it in a future episode.To support this podcast, check out our sponsors & get discounts:» Alma: There’s no replacement for human connection. Better with people. Better with Alma. Visit helloalma.com/DATEME to get started and schedule a free consultation today.» OneSkin: Get 15% off OneSkin with the code DATEME at oneskin.co #oneskinpod» SquareSpace: Head to squarespace.com/DATEME to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain using code DATEME.» ZocDoc: Stop putting off those doctors appointments and go to Zocdoc.com/DATEME to find and instantly book a top-rated doctor today.View all of our sponsors and discounts codes at wwydm.notion.site/sponsors.Follow:YouTube: @WhyWontYouDateMePodcastTikTok: @whywontyoudatemepod Instagram: @nicolebyerX: @nicolebyerNicole's book, #VERYFAT #VERYBRAVE: indiebound.org/book/9781524850746This is a Headgum podcast. Follow Headgum on Twitter, Instagram, and Tiktok. Advertise on Why Won't You Date Me? via Gumball.fm.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Curious about today's outfit or just want to watch the show instead of just listening? Check out the YouTube link in the show notes. This is a Head Gum Podcast. -♪ Why won't you date me? Why won't you date me? Why won't you date me? Please tell me why! Ooh baby welcome to another episode of Why Won't You Date Me? A podcast where me Nicole Byer was trying to figure out why I was single, even though you could come on a pancake and tell me it's butter.

My guest today is a writer, comedian, and co-host of Smith Sisters Live, which is a little bit of a tongue twister for me, streaming on SiriusXM's Radio Andy. It's Mariah Smith! Hi. Mariah, how are you? I'm great, how are you?

Listen, thriving, feeling good. I mean, you look stunning. Uh, thank you. Everything's hitting, I'm so happy. Thank you so much. Nails are great. Thank you. I'm wearing a sweatshirt that says hog wild.

There we go. What is that from? That looks familiar, that character. I don't know. I, okay, I love, I've been talking about Depop. Yeah, I just started listening on Depop. I love Depop. I just got a notification that my third item sold, and I got chills.

Oh! So you trust Depop? I do. I love Depop. It's great. I find so many fabulous things on it. Oh my god. Like weird little kitschy things, and it's all really cheap. It's so cheap, which kind of makes me sad as a seller. Cause they'll be like, you know, things like this, the similar items I picked $300 for $10.

I'm like, but I don't need it. Yeah. The thing I like about it is people, so like, I feel like a lot of like vintage resellers are like, I know you want it. So it's going to be $150. On Depop they're like, I don't know, $2, $6. When I was in Portland once, for my birthday,

I don't know why I was like, I need this 50 cent G unit, authentic concert tee. It was from the last concert. I've never been to a 50 cent concert. I don't know a song from that album. $250, I almost bought it. Because I said, well, this is authentic. They said it's period accurate. They were like, this is something that you can't get. And I said, well, if I can't get it, I should pay $250.

That's how I feel all the time. I'm trying to break that. But here's the thing, you can go on eBay and find the exact thing for cheaper. There you go. And I'm trying to get into eBay now too, because like that, I feel like I've really sort of done myself a disservice by not letting that in earlier.

And so I'm really trying to correct my ways. I fucking love eBay. I love shopping online. Me too. Me too. It's my biggest kryptonite. Yes. Truly my biggest. And I just, I keep buying things. I like, do you have like a stock room in your house? Like a place where like there are just boxes or things you bought that you...

Yes. Okay, me too. Thank you. Yes. Thank you. But I have an assistant, her name's Lindsay. She's really great. So I try to stay on top of being like, hey, Lindsay, can you return this for me? Which is like, that's what you're using your assistant for? That's us.

I would hire someone just to do that. It is very nice. Cause when you don't do a return, then you have the thing and then you're just like, what do I do with this? Mariah, are you single, dating? Very single. Okay.

Very single. All right. So what are you looking for in a partner? And are you single? Dating? Very single. Okay. Very single. All right. So what are you looking for in a partner? And are you looking? I am. I am. I'm looking for someone... So I've been single for a while and I'm in my late 20s to early mid 30s. We're all 20s.

And I am like, I'm very independent. I can do anything I want. I can get anything I want for myself. So I'm like, I want someone who can fit into that, who's also independent themselves, but also can like do some of those things for me. You know, like return, it's not like an assistant, but someone who'll be like, my love language is gifting. And so I love gifting things to people.

So someone who loves to receive and someone who also will return things, I've gifted to myself. Okay. All right. I like that. You to people, so someone who loves to receive and someone who also will return things I've gifted to myself. Okay, all right. I like that. You're like, fuck me and do my returns. Thank you, thank you. But someone just like, bi-by. People are weird here in LA.

Someone who doesn't have a personality the size of a peanut, and who actually knows how to talk and make me laugh and also sit with me on the couch and shut up and watch NCIS. Oh, you're an NCIS gal. Oh, NCIS, SVU, Tracker, Ellsbeth, Chicago Med. What's Tracker? It's on CBS.

It's the number one CBS procedural. It's with Justin Hartley. Oh. It's season two. It's very good. Okay. Very good. It's very good. Okay. Very good. He's a rewardist. He like goes hunting for people.

Not hunting, he finds people. A rewardist? Yeah. Like a bounty hunter? Yes, yes. I like that you said a rewardist. That's the language of the show. That's the language of the show.

Really? Yes, that's the language of the show. I'm just living in the world. You know, I love that for you. Thank you. Are you on the apps, Mariah? I am on the apps. I am, I love that for you. Thank you. Are you on the apps, Mariah? I am on the apps.

I am on Raya and Hinge. Okay. I delete them constantly. I know that life. I hate them. And I just saw this TikTok woman who was like a, I think she's a dating coach or whatever, but she posted at the end of last year,

she was like, this is what you need to find a person in 2024. I didn't see this TikTok till a week ago. She was like, delete the apps and not because it, you know, is something for your mental health. She was like, she used to work in apps. She said, delete it, because they prioritize new users. So then when you re-log on, she's like,

don't pause your account. Don't just like say, I'm taking a break, delete it fully and then come back as a new user, same info, whatever, and you'll have better options. Has that worked for you? No. Not yet, I mean. You're like, I just did it yesterday. Well, guess what?

I delete it at least once a month and I still have some of the same fools coming through. And how do people approach you? Or are you approaching the people? This is, okay, I'm gonna admit this. And I was telling my friends this the other day. Because I'm a black woman who's not a stick figure on these apps, it's like tumbleweed.

And then if it's not a tumbleweed, it's someone who looks like a tumbleweed. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Okay. So I'm trying to fix that, and it could be, I know that in my little responses, I'm not putting like,

I can't wait to find the love of my life and start everything together, da-da-da-da. It's just like, I want you to like what I like and be normal. Yes. And liberal, like like and be normal. Yes. And liberally, that's basically it. Yes, that is truly just like the bare minimum. The bar's on the floor.

Yes. Yeah, I mean, anybody who's like, I'm looking for the love of my life. To me, that's kind of a red flag. A complete red flag. Yes, we're all here looking. I mean, you're either looking for the love of your life or you're just looking to fuck that

Truly the thing is it's like you don't have to put either one of those out there because I'll know within the first message I do think you should say it just looking to fuck I think if I think if that's what you're looking for say it, but I want the love of my life Then that means you get to swipe no on the person who's like I'm just here to fuck. Yeah, you know what I mean? I think that's the one thing. Yeah. Because I can just assume that you're on a dating app to date, to find somebody. Yes, right.

That's just a base assumption. Exactly, to find somebody, to do whatever it is you, it's like literally just finding a person, then you can decide what the purpose is for later. Yes, but when you're like, I don't know what I'm looking for, I'm like, what do you mean? Old, old man, what do you mean? What do you mean? You don't know what I'm looking for. I'm like, what do you mean? Old, old man, what do you mean?

What do you mean? You don't know what you're looking for. If you're looking to fuck, say it. And those men are. But you have to say it so I can go, no, thank you. I don't wanna just fuck. Yeah. You know?

Yeah. But they like to trick you and then get in your messages, then ask you a real question. Then they're just like, so what are you wearing? And it's funny. Thanks. No one're just like, so what are you wearing? And it's funny. No one's ever been like, what are you wearing? These? Okay. Also during the pandemic, there was this woman who did like,

I was trying to think about it, or like find info about it the other day, this matchmaking service for like, singles at home, and she was like, I think you just sent her your Instagram or something. I can't remember, but it was like going around. And she was like, what am I doing? So I did it. I matched with this guy.

He was around my age. He seemed like, this is not, he seemed good because he was going to a protest. And I was like, oh, he was a white guy. And I was like, oh man, he's in the thick of it. I had lost my mind. Sure. to a protest and I was like, aw, then he was a white guy and I was like, aw man, he's in the thick of it. I had lost my mind. Sure.

And then he was like, after we were talking about like Black Lives Matter, whatever, and then he was like, I'm so hard right now. Huh? Huh? And so I said, did it. Racial equality makes me horny. I was like... Marching in the streets with my black sisters makes me wanna cum.

I truly was blunch away. I said, sir. And for me, I'm like, I don't know what to do now with this information, because I don't wanna engage you, but I also wanna see what your end goal is besides. Really? I probably would have been like, and what is your end goal with all this?

I know, yeah. Like, is role playing like us in the street, like just before bed with signs? And then like you fuck me later? I mean, honestly. Like what? Like you want someone then to come in with flares and that's gonna do it?

Ha, ha, ha, ha. I have the tear gas. And he's like, and I'm gonna come. Wait, that is so wild. And then he sent me photos of him and women's lingerie the next day in jeans. He said he loved to wear that as well.

Which I'll go for it, but again, we had stopped talking at that point. Yes, also I probably would have revealed I liked women's lingerie before I said protesting makes me hard. Yeah. So that's why these things are backwards in communication. Things are backwards.

That's tough. Real quick, we have to take a break. ["Sexy Girl"] Today's episode is brought to you by Alma. Look, I get it. Finding a therapist can be tricky. Maybe you've searched online for hours and had a call around, or maybe you found someone great only to realize they don't take your insurance.

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just the way you want it. Ready to get started? Head to squarespace.com slash date me for a free trial. When you're ready to launch, use offer code DATEME to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. What's one of the worst dates you've been on? It's, okay, the worst date worst dates you've been on? It's... It... Okay. The worst date that I have ever been on,

and... I can't believe I went to three locations with this person. I had met someone at an event. It was like an industry thing. And he was the brother of someone. And throughout this party, we had... an amazing night. Like, my sisters were there, his family was there.

Truly, by the end of the night, and it was one of those parties that didn't end until like 4 a.m., we were like, we've met each other's families, we've done this. Like, we thought we were in love. I was truly like, this is the person I'm going to marry. So then his brother told a family member of mine, Like, we thought we were in love. I was like, this is the person I'm going to marry. Okay. So then his brother told a family member of mine, they were like, my brother loves, you know, Mariah.

Like, he's like, they're gonna be together, da-da-da. And we hadn't gone on our first date yet. And he was first red flag is he was using WhatsApp. He was WhatsApping me. But why is that a red flag? Because it's an Android. Huh. Okay.

I don't, I truly. Okay. Do you have an Android? No, I have an iPhone. Okay, there we go. But I will say, when they have an Android, I do like WhatsApp. I hate WhatsApp.

Really? I hate it. I like WhatsApp better than the green. But the WhatsApp is the green personified for me. But you can switch the settings. So mine are purple. If you have to use WhatsApp, your phone doesn't work without Wi-Fi.

So what are we doing? -♪ Hahahaha. -♪ I don't get it. I hate it. And so he was messaging me on WhatsApp and we were like planning our date. He, at the time I was vegan, he was also vegan. And so we went to this vegan restaurant for our date. And this is when he had told me already

that he wanted to marry me and was like waiting for the right time to propose basically. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. So at this event, he was like, I want to marry you. Yes, then after. And you said, this is great, let's go on a date. I was 20 something, lost in it. Okay. I thought.

I get it. Lost in the sauce. Love of my life. All right. It, like, I think at this event, we were like making out all bit. Like it was just, it felt like a fairy tale. Okay.

And so we went to this restaurant and things were going okay until he had told me that he had run into some legal trouble. And it was for something like crazy. And I was like, okay, not too bad. It wasn't like a violent offense. So I was like, this is fine. So he then was like, let's go to this bar near my apartment.

And it's a bar I liked, so it was near where I lived. We get a cab. He gets the Uber and it's under someone else's name, but someone's name of note. And I was like, why are you using this person's name as your Uber? Again, didn't think twice about it. We're at this bar, second location. We're at this bar and we're just drinking and he, I was like, so what's your favorite thing? And he was like about what we're talking about work. And I was

like, what's your favorite thing, you know, that you do in your job, like all that. And he said, firing people. I was like, oh, firing people. Firing people was his favorite thing. And I'm like, huh, that's tricky. Yeah. That's interesting. And like, it was just, and that was the least offensive thing he said during that time.

Okay. Again, he was like, I have a great view from my apartment. Do you want to come over? Uh-huh. And I'm like, sure. At this point, I have a great view from my apartment. Do you wanna come over? And I'm like, sure. At this point, I already knew. I was like, maybe, you know, no one's perfect, basically.

And everyone has flaws. Andy was older than me. I can accept some of these things. I can accept some of these things. What else did he say while you were at the bar? When he had legal troubles, had to come across the country to New York, I was in New York then, and he couldn't fly.

And so he- He couldn't fly? No, so he drove, and there are very key things I truly cannot say. Sure, sure, sure. So he drove, and then as he was driving, he loved, he was like, I love getting on apps and finding women who are married,

so we just have like quick one-night stands that would go through the country and do that. So I was like... I mean, Mariah, I'm just saying, you went to three locations with a man who said, I have legal troubles, and on my way to solve those legal troubles, I fucked married women across the country,

and then the end goal is to settle my legal troubles. But okay, let's go to the third location. The third location is his home. Uh-huh. And he, we're in Manhattan, and we're in like, it is up, Uppertown, but he, I said Uppertown, like I didn't live there, I was like, Uptown, but he, I said Uppertown like I didn't live there. I was like Upptown, but upper, Upptown.

You know, I sounded stupid. Uppertown. Uppertown, Uppertown, New York. I was like, where was this Uppertown? Uppertown. But he has, he lives alone in a three-bedroom apartment. And I'm like, mm-hmm. Doing well.

Doing well. Walk in, mm-hmm. I'm doing well. Doing well. Walk in, everything is Christine, but he has red leather pouches. And I'm like, huh, okay. So then how red? Are we talking like fire engine red or like burgundy? Closer to fire engine, but not as bright.

Suck. Yes. Okay. And it's like one of those sets you get at like Bob's this town. It's, you know, the couch, the loveseat, the chair type situation. Okay. So he also, what I realized, is very organized. And he was like, do you want a glass of wine? And I'm like, sure.

I don't drink red, but he only had red. So I was like, okay. Of course, red couch is red wine. But he was like, I don't really drink wine, so I don't know how to open this. And so I tried to open the wine bottle. And for whatever reason, and this is the first and last time this has happened to me,

it was red wine, it like splattered on the wall. And this man, again, very particular and white walls. Mm-hmm. He got very upset, and I had to clean the walls. I, as I'm repeating this, I haven't told the story in a while, and I was, I can't stress enough, I was in my early 20s. So he was like, you made a mess, clean my wall. Clean it up. And so I was like, okay.

So after I clean the walls, we go to his couch, and, you know, I was like, oh, you know, what's gonna happen? He was like, I. So then after I clean the walls, we go to his couch and I was like, oh, what's gonna happen? And he was like, I wanna show you my favorite show. And I was like, okay. And so then we watch an episode of Archer and I was like, all right, cool. So then, still I'm like, I'll still maybe like, hook up with him or something.

I made it this far. I made it this far. I made it this far. And then when I like, truly, when I got in my right mind, I was like, I'm not gonna have sex with this man. I excused myself. He then, and for some reason I was like, I hope he still likes me like that. I don't know.

Truly deranged. I was really hoping. Then the next day or like a couple of days later, he texted me and he was like, yeah, I don't think we're compatible. You want something more serious than I can give you. And I was like, okay. Okay.

Great. Good to know. I... It... What a wild... Good to know. That is a wild date. Yeah, but I wish I could say I made better choices after that.

Um... I truly got a massage the other day, because I had class pass points, and it was this random place in the valley. It looked normal. I walk in, and it's like one of those warehouses that have multiple little things. And it's this man, and I thought it was like one of those warehouses that have multiple little things. And it's this man, and I thought it was like a business.

I get into a room smaller than this, like half this size. It's only one massage table, just this man and his tools. And he like was doing like, it was like very deep tissue, sort of sports-like type of massage. Before the massage, he's on bended knee talking to me like this for an hour and a half about the tissue and your body and how important massaging is and like how he gets into things

and like how it connects with the mind and brain. Again, I love massages, first thing you should know. An hour and a half? And the time was flying because I was like, I just want him to give me my massage and I'm alone in this room with him and I don't wanna leave. So then finally, get the, I, he excuses himself, I get undressed for the massage, I'm on the massage table.

He's using different tools and he was like, I need you to breathe deep. You know, like sometimes when I massage, I want you to breathe, it's like, get the tension out. And he was like, you're not breathing hard deep. Sometimes in the massage, I want you to breathe to get the tension out. And he was like, you're not breathing hard enough or loud enough. You need to breathe louder for the people in the other room to hear you. And so he was like, huh. Like, he was trying to tell me how hard to breathe.

And I was like, I just wanted to keep doing it. So he would tell me, not tell me to keep doing it basically, you know? And then I left and I tipped him, of course. I really... I understand I sound like a lunatic, and I do have my wits about me. I do. I promise you. It's just in certain situations, they go out of the window.

I feel you on this. I've been in very strange circumstances where I'm like, I should leave. And I don't. I stay and it's weird and it is what it is. And I can't help. And then I look back on it and as I retell it, I'm like, my parents raised me so much better.

So much better. I was raised with just a little bit of sense, and I don't know where it's gone. Truly, baby. It's so funny. How long did this massage, was it like a two hour massage? It was only 60 minutes. And usually I do minimum 90 minutes. I love a two hour.

And like the 60 minutes was already, it was basically like a hint to massage for me. And so for it to be that type of experience for only 60 minutes, I could have just had my points cross over to the next month. Yes, wait, what is class pass? People talk about it and I don't know what it is. I used to hate it. And when I lived in New York, I had it and I hated it.

How long did you live in New York? 10 years. Oh, okay. And I like never used it. I was always missing classes. It was just like, didn't work well for me. And then when I like earlier this year, I started doing Pilates and I was like,

I don't want to go to one studio or do one X, Y, and Z. And I realized on class pass, you can go to a Pilates class for like eight points or like six points or whatever. And it's only $89 a month to go to all these other things. I can do that, I can go to Barry's, I can go to Boondi, I can do whatever. And it's like, I use it as a supplement

to like my full workouts. You know, I love it. And you can get facials, massages. Oh. Actually good ones. Maybe I should get into, it's called ClassPass. ClassPass, I'll send you a code. Yeah, send me a code for ClassPass.

I don't really do classes. I really hate them and I can only stomach like, Barry's I like how it feels after, but I hate that type of instructor. Pilates, I love it because I can't really see the instructor, they're just like walking around talking. It doesn't, it feels like you're in your own little world, but I can't do what I used to do in New York

where it's like a dance fitness class and you're just like, oh, like that type of thing. I, that would drive me crazy. So- I simply can't. I once did a Zumba class where the teacher kept dancing right next to me. My friend was like, she doesn't ever do that.

I was like, I'll never get it. Leave me alone. Just leave me alone. And then I used to do pole classes. Now I do private sessions because it's tailored to me. I love a private session. And that's how I started doing Pilates. I started with private sessions before I did any classes.

So I was like, you know, I've never done a reformer. What's a reformer? It's the... That's the machine? I've never done it. I've never even taken a yoga class or Pilates class on a mat. So truly had no idea what I was doing. It helped so much.

I took three privates, then jumped into classes. I also did that with lifting. I start every new, now my new thing is every new like exercise I wanna try, I do a private. Well, I think that's like helpful because you kind of learn how your body works for things. Like the last pole class I took, I was like, oh, do you have like an adjustment for this move?

And she was like, no, just do it. And I was like, cool. Okay. Okay. So then I knew in my brain, she was like, no, just do it. And I was like, cool. Okay. Okay. So then I knew in my brain, I was like, in order for me to do it, I have to figure out the adjustment and that like sucks. It sucks when someone's like, just do it. I hate that.

Cause then I'm like, I'm not gonna do it. No, I'm true. And I can't imagine on a pole, I'm not gonna do it. No, like absolutely not. That is hard. Pole is very hard. How do you handle going upside down? Well, thank you for asking.

I've just really gotten into it. It is hard and you kind of just have to, when you are upside down, you're like, all right, there is a finite amount of time for me to set into the move or come down because I can't hold it for super long. Some people can. But I can do a crucifix, which is you're holding the pole upside down with your knees and your

arms go out. I can do an inside leg hang, which hurts. Because that's like when you're, it's one leg. It's one leg over the pole and then your other leg is going backwards and when you're, it's one leg. It's one leg over the pole and then your other leg is going backwards and then you're holding it with, the pole is like that through your leg and then your arm has to grip the pole

so there's like three points and I'm learning how to do leg switches and it, oh my God, my side is all bruised. I was gonna say, is your body literally like insane? My body is bruised on one side. But how do you even it out then? You have to do both sides. And my teacher's always like, we gotta do both sides.

And I'm always like, leave me alone. That is hard. Mariah, you have no idea. And I don't know why I love it so much. Because it's like, when you get the, that's why people have lip idea that, and I don't know why I love it so much. Because it's like when you get the, that's why people lip-dance, like when you get the, when you have progression, it's addicting.

Even though it is hateful in the moment. Huh. Oh, there you go, you got it. Huh, huh, huh, my body. I had Paul on Sunday and I'm still reeling from it because I had to go to my friend's adult tap recital. The tapitalists, there was a monster who came to town and that was the whole storyline.

It was really wild and I loved it. But we only had an hour, usually we'd go for two. And she was like, all right, well, we're working on Upside Down, so we'll just go Upside Down for the hour. And I had to invert, I don't know, like 10 times, and I was exhausted. And probably delirious,

because your body, like, being, like, keeping, going up and down, like, I have POTS, and I could never. I have PANS, what's POTS? POTS is like, I don't know the actual, like, postural, or, it's basically when your blood constricts and like I get dizzy very easily and I faint. Oh no. And so like going upside down, I truly can't,

like I can't get up too quick or else I'm liable to pass out. That's so scary. You're fine. Is it? Yeah, I mean, I honestly, I think TikTok because it taught me what it was. Oh, you know, TikTok and Instagram, they be teaching.

They be teaching. So I was like, I've been fainting since I was six. And the first time was at a funeral and my family and doctor saw it, it was just like shock. And then kept happening, I faint at least once a year. Like I know it's been 364 days. I'm like, oh Jesus, I'm about to faint tomorrow. Cause like I know it would be.

And do you know you're about to faint? Absolutely. So you can be like, I'm gonna faint. Yes, yes. And I, but then I was like, every doctor I went to, and I've seen so many doctors and they're like, you just need like smelling salts. And it's like, I clearly, I don't just need smelling salts. No, there's something else going on.

Something else happening. Something's afoot. Something's afoot. But then I heard about POTS, and I was like, I have every one of those symptoms. And I went to my doctor, and we did some tests, and they were like, oh yeah, when you stand up, your blood is supposed to, I think,

go to your head or something. And mine pools in my abdomen, so I don't get blood flow, like, further up. And then I just get dizzy. So I just have to be careful. That is so wild that you had to, like... Go online, watch videos and be like, this is what's wrong with me. And then a doctor went, -"Ah!" Yes. Yes. That is what's wrong with you.

And I truly don't even know much about it, because I'm like, they're just like, oh, yeah, they oh yeah, and doctors don't call it pots a lot of the time. That's like the... It's a term for it, but it's an umbrella for a lot of stuff. But I'm like, mine is by no means as drastic as many other people's. Like, I just am very used to it, because I've been living my life like this all day. I'm like, everyone doesn't get dizzy when they stand up.

And everyone doesn't go dizzy when they stand up. Everyone doesn't go black when they stand up. And I was like, oh, okay, fine. It is fun to figure out what's wrong with you. I have type two diabetes. Yay! She did it! Yay! And all of my diabetic symptoms I thought were just,

that's the way my body is. And since being on medication for it, I was like, oh, that's how people been living. That's so nice. Cause I would get like super thirsty or I peed so much. And then I can't describe how my body felt internally other than like I had tingles a lot. I can't describe how my body felt internally other than like I had tingles a lot. Like I was very tingly all the time

and would get like sick to my stomach a lot and I just like wouldn't feel good. What tipped it? Like when were you like, what's going on? Okay, well I went to the gynecologist. Okay, good for you. And she did my blood pressure, and she was like, it was like 200 over something, and she was like,

do you see spots? Do you have a headache? And I was like, no. And then she was like, cause if you had any of those things, I'd send you to the ER. And I was like, oh my God, it's an emergency. And then I lived like that for two more years.

Oh. And then I fell down my stairs in 2020, and I broke my ankle and was at the ER, and then went to the orthopedic surgeon. They did my blood pressure and they were like, we cannot operate on you with this high blood pressure. And I was like, ugh, rats, I have to walk. So then I went to a general practitioner or whatever, and she put me on, we did like a bunch of tests,

and she was like, you have high cholesterol and you have high blood pressure, so let's get all those in check. And then she was like, and your AC1 or whatever is in diabetic range, like it's very high. And I was like, whoa, what? So then she put me a Metformin and all of it went away. And I was like, I was seeing spots.

I did have a headache. Isn't it great being black? It's fun. Well, I will say it is my fault because that gynecologist, her name is Rebecca Brown, she was my favorite. She has since left the practice. And I really miss you, Rebecca.

But I really loved her. She was so nice to me. And then like checked in on me. Like she was really like, she was like, have you gotten this under control? And I was like, bitch, no. Leave me alone, I love you. No, and then when I finally did,

I was like, oh yeah, here you go. And then before I got on birth control, she was like, you told me that your mother died of deep vein thrombosis, so I need you to get some tests done to make sure that you are not predisposed to blood clots before I figure out what to prescribe you. And I loved her so much because no other doctor had taken such care

and made sure that my family history came into play and stuff because I think some doctors are like, you are fat and that's it, lose weight, I don't, whatever. But like she really made sure to be like, some stuff you can't help. That is so, my mind is blown because my dad died of deep vein thrombosis after a stroke and he had type two diabetes.

And he was like, doctors weren't helping him get it under control and he had like stressful job, it was during, you know, 2021. And so then after that, I was like, doctors weren't helping him get it under control. And he had like a stressful job. It was during, you know, 2021. And so then after that, I was like, I want to be a little doctor. And I realized, I was like, I need to like, get ahead of basically my health, family's health history, and truly just being black and American, not being predisposed to high blood pressure type two.

And so I got on Monjaro and I never looked back. And now... I'm also on Monjaro. It's my favorite thing in the world. I like it, but I'm like, will I be part of a class action lawsuit in 10 years? I don't care. I'm like, I truly am like,

it is the best thing in the world. It's expensive as the Dickens, but it's great. Does your insurance cover it? Because I'm not diabetic. Oh, I see. But I'm like, I need this so I don't become diabetic. Because my body, that's what it wants to do. Mm-hmm.

So... Yeah, I once went to the doctor. I had been away for a week, I once went to the doctor. I had been away for a week, so I hadn't taken it. And she was like, your numbers are bad. And I was like, what? I was like, just a week not taking this? Okay.

Like, let's get to it. I mean, it is, I truly, and I also just got off Metformin, so I was on that too. I think it's a miracle drug. It's like the fountain of youth, they say. What, Manjaro? Metformin. Oh, Metformin.

For so many things, they're like, for whatever reason, now I sound like a woohoo person on TikTok. I love it. But it changes you from the inside out. Oh. It really reworks whatever, which is why I love being on it. But then it started making me feel sick again, and I was like, I can't do this.

Interesting. Metformin doesn't make me feel sick. I'm just on so much stuff right now. Me too, I love a med. Dee dee dee dee dee. Real quick, we gotta take a break. -♪ Today's episode is brought to you by ZocDoc. Okay, be honest, have you ever needed to see a doctor by kept putting it off? You know, saying things like, I'm too busy,

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I did. May I ask how much? It's so crazy when I say this because... I can't believe it and my family can't. Mm-hmm. 100 pounds. That's great. That's wild. And I'm like, I still want to lose more, but I don't know. I lost 90. That's... Isn't it crazy?, I still want to lose more, but I don't know. I lost 90.

That's... Isn't it crazy? It is crazy that there was 90 extra pounds on me. And also, it was... Okay. I don't... Did you ever look in the mirror and go, I don't know who this person is? Not yet. Okay. Kind of. Well, I don't know, because I'm like, it felt...

To me, I still feel like I look the exact same. So I don't know what's wrong with me in that regard. So I think that that's a me issue, and not an issue that many others are having. Interesting. I like once woke up and I was like, I don't know who she is. I don't know. She looks different. Wow. And what was like, what was that like, Bri? What, like, it felt weird.

I was like, I have to get used to this person. Yeah. And for a hot second, I was like, I don't know if I like her. She looks weird. And I missed my bigger butt. Really? I just missed things. Yes.

Wow. And, because I... I don't know. I liked the way I looked. Yeah. I liked having a bigger butt. I liked the way that like my titties were tiny. My butt was big. Like it was really very much pear-shaped.

And then I liked my double chin being more prominent because I thought I looked more cherub-like. Ooh, oh my God. The thing is you have always looked like an actual doll. So I think that's like part of the thing, but that's not gonna go away. Yeah, and that was the thing I had to get with. To be like, oh, I am still me.

I just look a little different. And then I like stopped posting pictures of like my body so much because I was like, I don't want my body to be a point of discussion. And I don't want to hear congratulations because it was like, oh, I have diabetes. Like, this is not like, the wire is like, yay!

Someone in my DMs, they were like, I had just posted a photo and they not like, the wire was like, yay! Someone in my DMs, they were like, I had just posted a photo and they were like, look at the glow up. And I was like, that's tough to hear. The glow up? Because it's like, I thought I was cute before. And my sister, Lauren, always would say, and this is true, she's like, a bad bitch is a bad bitch,

no matter what they weigh. And I'm like, that's... I have, you know, regardless of my dating history for the past whatever, I'm a little cutie. I can, you know, I'm like, the face was always gonna be there. The face was always facing. So, no matter what, that's how I felt. And I didn't have trouble fucking.

Well, I do. Oh, yeah. They don't like me out here. I'm sorry. Do you find dating was easier in New York? Yes. Yeah, a lot. But I wasn't taking it as seriously. Same.

And so that's the issue. Same. When I was in New York, it wasn't like, oh, I'd like to be partnered. I was like, who am I gonna fuck tonight? You're just like, I'm just literally out in Brooklyn until 5 AM doing God knows what. And so in hindsight, I'm like, oh. But now I can't go back from here.

No, not at all. You know what's interesting about losing weight and exercise? It does make the exercise easy, which is, or not easy, easier, which is annoying, because when you're fatter, they're like, just exercise, and you're like, but it's hard. It's hard?

But it's so hard. And now it's like, okay, things are a little easier. But also- Now I actually love exercising. I'm not there yet. And I truly never thought I would, and I used to, like, there were times in my past, like when I lived in New York, where I would go to Crunch all the time

and do those stupid little classes. And now my whole week revolves around my lifting schedule and Pilates. Oh. That's it. Oh, I'm simply not there yet. I do these, I've talked about it before, but I do these 30 minute workouts with this man named Daniel,

who's a part of the Body Project. I don't know. It's like a bigger thing that I'm not I just do the free videos Okay, I don't do them with his wife. I don't like her She goes too fast and she doesn't tell me I'm doing a good job But Daniel will tell me I'm doing a good job. I love that and he's like sit down if you want He's from Australia or somewhere. I feel like I've heard of it before I He's from Australia or somewhere. I feel like I've heard of him before. I mean, I love it.

And I was like, okay, if I do 30 minutes a day, that's more than not doing it. I can commit to 30 minutes, but I'll put it off for the longest, because I just hate it. And then he's always like, do you feel better? And I'm like, yeah, I guess I do. Yeah, begrudgingly, I do. Like, and that's... I'm going gonna speak to you like someone I hate.

Yes, give it to me. That's why it's best to do it in the morning. It's truly, and I will say, my sister's radio show is from 6 a.m. to 7 a.m. Like, we're live 6 a.m. to 7 a.m. I'm not a morning person, so I'm like, I'm already up. I may as well. Is this from home or do you have to drive somewhere? From home, 6 a.m. to 7 a.m. I'm not a morning person, so I'm like, I'm already up, I may as well. Is this from home or do you have to drive somewhere?

From home, from home, thank God. And I'm like, I may as well just like get it done. And I realize when I don't simply just go after our show, it's harder for me to like, I still wanna go, but it's harder for me to be like, okay, let's just go do it and I have less energy to do it. But I truly never in my life, even when I thought I enjoyed working out,

thought I would enjoy working out. I simply don't. But I do love pole. And I think the key is like finding something you love. Wait, have you ever met anyone at the gym? No, because I take these. Oh, because you do privates. Well, I was doing privates.

Then I am in these, up until last week, small women. It's like this woman lifting trainer. It's like six people a session at her house in Encino outside. And it's amazing. But now I just need to change for a variety of reasons that may or may not have included the election. Oh Okay, but well then

But do you think you would ever approach anyone at the gym? No, why I Personally for me, I don't want to be bothered So I'm like why then would I bother someone else? I get that. Like, I just, it's not, I'm not in that head space. Maybe right as I'm entering or... Or departing.

Departing, like, but as it's happening, I'm too focused on, like, what I need to get done. And I don't want to lose momentum, and I just gotta keep it going. Wow. That's also probably why I'm not single too. I don't want to lose momentum and I just got to keep it going. Wow. That's also probably why I'm not single too. I don't approach people. I mean, I don't really approach people either,

but sometimes I do. Like, I really like to give a compliment. Like, oh my goodness, look at those pants. And that's what, they were off to the races. Oh, look at those pants. Your to the races. Look at those pants. Your life is changed. I like those pants. Wait, so you're on the apps currently.

Yeah. Have you had any good dates from the apps? No. No. Not a single good one. Like Pleasant. Okay. What do you mean by pleasant?

They're a nice good one. Like pleasant. Okay, what do you mean by pleasant? Like they're a nice enough person. Like you can hold a conversation with them, but no one who is like, oh, you know, like a connection type of thing, or it's just weird. Fair. I went on a string of like weird bad dates. It was like a solid three month span

where I was like, everybody's bad. Like I keep getting into my car and calling somebody being like, this happened. And they'd be like, it's not that bad. I'm like, yeah, but like, ugh. It's just weird. Yes, they're just being weird and just like not fun. Or they'll suggest like a bad place to go

and I'm like, whatever, I guess I'll go here. I truly, and I don't, I'm someone who like, I don't like to be, go out of my way, especially if it's for someone on an app. I'm like, I need it to be the most convenient thing, and the, it has to make complete sense. I'm like, I have more things to do. Again, even if that's just sitting on my couch

watching Gibbs on FDIS. Like, that's important to me. That is important to my health and wellness. Like, I will cancel anything to do that. To sit on the couch. Wait, tell me about another date you've been on. I don't think your nails look that bad. I will cancel anything to do that. To sit on the couch. Wait, tell me about another date you've been on. I don't think your nails look that bad.

They look awful. They're bad because it's like. They're not bad. They're just, they're not smooth. They're not smooth. But that's okay. I know, and it's hard gel. And it's iridescent.

Yeah, I tried to do. Do you have a little thing? No, I don't have that yet. I just started my hard gel journey at home. And we're gonna get better. We're gonna get better. I did them last yet. I just started my hard gel journey at home. And we're gonna get better. We're gonna get better. I did them last night and then I did them again this morning. After my show at 7 a.m. I was like,

I can't look at these anymore, the ones last night. What time do you go to sleep? I try to be asleep by 10 30. And sometimes it doesn't work, but in an ideal world, and I say 1030 so I can be a functioning member of like grownup society, in an ideal world, I'd be in bed by eight. Eight? That's so early.

I love the bed, I love the couch, and I love the sleep. I love sleeping too. I, okay, I love sleeping during the day. I do, I love a nap. I love sleeping too. I, okay, I love sleeping during the day. I do, I love a nap. I love a nap. I love a nap. And I have this aura ring. I love waking up at noon. It's, I wish I could wake up at noon now.

Well, you can't, you gotta work at six fucking a.m. But even when I wanna, the other day I had, we didn't have the show, and my body naturally woke me up at 5.30 in the morning. I wanted to catapult myself out of the window, and I couldn't go back to sleep. Oh! Could not go back to sleep. Do you wear an eye mask? Oh, God, I have it all.

I have an eye mask, I have a weighted blanket, I have... Wait, and you couldn't go back to sleep with all that? No, because my brain was just racing. See, when it's the day, my brain goes, there's a lot of stuff going on, you better get back to sleep. You better stay away from the world. You, here's the thing, don't play with me in a good old nap. I won't fall asleep at 11 a.m. till 3 p.m.

But sometimes I just gotta be like, call it a day at 8.30, see what's doing on YouTube, and get my behind the bed. That's so funny, I can't do that. I'm up till one, two, three, just finding things to do. That's my preference. Gotta fold the laundry, it's 3 a.m. I wish. That's my preference, and that's who I am at my core,

but the way my job is set up right now, unfortunately, it's boxed me into a corner. I'm so sorry, God bless. Thank you. Wait, tell me about another date you've been on. Let me see, I'm trying to think of one that's like not... Insane. I want insane, unless it's traumatic for you.

No, I think, no, no. Nothing, I really can't find trauma in many things now. Since experiencing the death of a parent. It does. So I'm like, I just, I truly, a date, I'm trying to think of a date, oh God. When I first moved to LA, before I moved here,

and I really, I can't stress enough, I have good judgment, I do. I just want to preface this by saying I have good judgment. Well, I can't wait. So before I moved to LA, I was on, I don't know how I met this guy. I think I was on some dating app, it had to have been.

And I was like searching, I was looking in LA, because I was like about to be there the next week. And we matched and then we started talking. He seemed like nice, normal, into the same things. And I remember, and this is again, first red flag. We were like, since I'm not there, let's, we didn't even FaceTime, we talked on the phone. We were talking on the phone,

we talked on the phone for five hours. And I was like, oh, this guy seems like great, amazing. Yeah. Five hours. Get to LA, we have a date. And I wish I remembered where it was, because, like, I didn't have my bearings about this city, and I truly wish. It was like some jazz place, I think.

Oh, no, I simply would say no. It was, I, but I didn't, I didn't know what I did not know. Sure, okay. So, we go to this jazz place and he had, he had been telling me that he was not really employed, but like working for a, I think what he said was a quarter at his mom's theater, like as a performer.

And he was just doing that as like a, he had some reason why it had to be a quarter. I don't really. A quarter? I really, it was like some theater in Glendale. Wait, he was working as a quarter? No, for a quarter, like as payment. One singular quarter?

One singular quarter. For like, it was like, he was, that was the thing. I love that you said that so casually, like it was a thing. He was working for a quarter and, you know, his mom owned the theater and I'm like it was a thing. He was working for a quarter and his mom owned the theater and I'm like, uh, okay. I'm like, because I'm trying to get, okay. So he, so we went on that date, again, stupid.

I just moved to my apartment and it wasn't really furnished. I was like, oh, let's just go back to my apartment, get a bottle of tequila, go back to my apartment and it wasn't really furnished. I was like, oh, let's just go back to my apartment, get a bottle of tequila, go back to my apartment. I... We get there and he proceeds to show me, he's a white guy, he shows me, he was like, you look exactly like my ex-girlfriend. And it was like this, we didn't look alike at all,

she was black. It was this black girl. It was just another black person. It was just another black person. It was just another black person. He said, you guys are twins. You must be related. Yes. What would you do if he showed you your sister? Like one of your sister's kids? I kind of would have kept it going just far enough

to be able to make fun of him the next day. Because I'm like, also, if you've dated one of my sisters, you know exactly who I am. That's the first thing we talk about, is each other. Um, but I, so then he was like, you know, reminding me about how, or he was telling me how he, I looked like her. Showed me the photo and then was like,

yeah, you know, we were together for a long time, da-da-da, she was amazing in bed, like, I wonder if you'll be as good as her in bed. And I was like in bed. Like, I wonder if you'll be as good as her in bed. And I was like, ew. Hmm. And so then he starts... crying about his ex-girlfriend and about how much he loved her and loves her

but thinks that he could love me as much as he loved her or loves her. And when I was like, I think, you know, you should leave. Yeah. He was like, I don't understand why. Like, what's wrong with, like, a man showing emotion? I was like, it's not you showing emotion. It's what the emotion is about.

What the emotion is about. That's what that is. That's wild. And it was so, and again, that was like the, I think the second night I officially lived in LA. He was like, welcome to LA. Everyone's a freak. Everyone is a freak. And so what, the best part about this guy is he was obviously white word. And he decided that the best thing for him was to... go teach English abroad.

And he had a blog about it. It was one of the craziest things. He, like, lived off peaches for a month. Like, it was very weird. And I'm like, thank the good Lord. I didn't even take this. I didn't even give him. Did you find the, you found the blog after? After, after.

It's already gone to where it went. Oh my God. I can't imagine A, someone crying on the first date. Yeah. B, about their ex-girlfriend. Who looked like me. My God. And I think it's wild that he showed you a picture of her.

That's unhinged. That's wild. God bless. Oh my God. Mariah. So, yeah. That's why I think dating in LA for me is also like, I'm still quite unsteady

because no one I've met feels regular. Like, they know it's just like something. And I wondered about myself. I'm like, have I become warped in the brain? And is that what people are thinking about me as well? Because like, I just don't know. I don't know either. But I think there's somebody out there for you.

We'll see. We'll see. No, I definitely do. Okay, I take it in, I receive it. Yeah, receive it. I receive it. Boy, oh boy, I'm really stuck on this man crying on a first date.

I've had a man cry on a date, and I was like, oh, no! It's just jarring when someone shows that type of, like, emotion in a way that's not about you. Yeah. And that's not joyous. Like, it just is... Yeah, I mean... Ugh.

I do think we should be in a relationship before you start crying at me. That is a bit, yeah, I think that, and that's honestly not a lot to ask. No, just a little bit of a commitment before you boo hoo hoo. I'm not even crying in front of my dog, God rest his soul, because I'm too nervous about it.

Why would I cry in front of a stranger on a date? Yeah, that's wild. I've only cried on one date, and that was going to the Sonic the Hedgehog themed cafe. And what gotcha? I love Sonic. Aw. But truly it was like in an old sunglass hut.

Okay. It was not like, it was not as big and as grand as I thought it was gonna be, but I was just so excited to be there that I was just like, tears of joy streamed down my face. I was so fucking excited. And how'd your date receive it? You know, he was like...

He said, I wish, I hope one day I love something as much as you love Sonic. I love that. I love it. Wait, Mariah, do you have any advice for single people? I would say be more vulnerable than you think you should be. Which I have yet to do, but I know is like what's holding me back. And so that is probably the biggest piece of advice. And treat it like a job.

Which I'm going to start doing in the new year. Like, that's what I felt like... I... That's what I feel like I need to be doing. One of my friends, I met her boyfriend that she met on the apps, and she was like, it took a while, but she said, bare minimum, go on two dates a month. But then I knew one friend who met her husband,

she would go, I think, for... And this only lasted a month, bare minimum, going two dates a month. But then I knew one friend who met her husband. She would go, I think, for... And this only lasted a month, I believe, for like three days of the week, she would go on three dates a night. So it'd be drinks, snacks, and then dessert. But met her husband within a month. Wait, she was going on three dates a week or three dates a day? Three dates a night. She was trying to get off, like, she was trying to do something different and be like, I just need to date more,

and committed to doing, like, an aggressive amount of dating, and it paid off tenfold. That's a lot of dating. No, I go to bed early and I love being on my couch. That is not the system for me. No. That is not. Two dates a month, I think, is good for you. Two dates a month is really good for me.

Mariah, I could talk to you all day. Same here. Do you have anything you want to promote? Just my little radio show with my sister, Smith Sisters Live on Radio Andy series XM, Channel 102, daily at 6 a.m. Pacific, 9 a.m. Eastern. Wild. It's so early. Mariah, 9 a.m. Eastern. Wild.

It's so early. Mariah, would you date me? Absolutely. Thank you. I mean, your assistant could do both of our returns at the same time. She really could. And that's a good way to utilize.

Lindsay, wait, oh my God, I forgot to ask you about this. So you were, we are at the end, but you got to cover the Steve Harvey show when you were an assistant, or no, you were working at Best Week Ever. Yeah, I had to watch it every day and it made me want to jump. Wait, you just had to watch?

Cause I was assistant at Best Week Ever, or PA at Best Week Ever, and we had to find clips for the show. Oh. And so it was like every PA had their sort of beat. I was Steve Harvey in Kardashians. And I truly had to watch Steve Harvey every day the Lord brought. Just because it was that crazy that there was truly always something

to be pulled for Best Poo. Was it just the Steve Harvey show or was it also Family Feud? Just the Steve Harvey show. I would personally love that job. I love Steve Harvey. I love Steve Harvey show. I, you know, I would personally love that job. I love Steve Harvey. I love Steve Harvey. He's a fascinating figure. Have you done Family Feud?

No, my sister has. Yes, with Lapkus, right? Yeah, yeah. He does stand up, like, in between. Like, he gives the audience a show. He is a showman. A showman? A showman. A showman. I don't know how to say that, because apparently I say it wrong. A showman? Because when I say the greatest showman. A showman? A showman. I don't know how to say that,

because apparently I say it wrong. A showman? Because when I say the greatest showman, everyone says I'm saying it wrong. The greatest showman? But it's not showman. No. That's stupid.

Showman. Showman. He's a showman. Yeah. And he's a workhorse. He is a workhorse. He works and works and works. Like, he's got a radio show, the Steve Harvey show, Family Feud.

It's wild. And he's got all them great suits. Just the dating, his dating POV I can't get with. It is a little archaic. But like I do think he is a very successful and smart guy, and funny, obviously. So funny, so wonderful. Well, we've come to the end.

Mariah, thank you so much for being here. Thank you for having me. If you like this episode of Why Won't You Date Me, you can like it, you can rate it, you can subscribe, give me five stars on Apple Podcasts. And if you write me something nasty hitting on me to whywon'tyoudatemepodcasts.gmail.com, we are running low.

I will read it. Nicole, let's recreate Jurassic Park. But instead of dinosaurs, it's just a bunch of horny dudes in dino suits chasing us. We'd hide under a table dino suits chasing us. We'd hide under a table until they'd find us. Then I'd watch you ride that T-Rex until he forgets about eating lawyers and starts eating...something else.

We'll call it Jurassic Pork. Jurassic Pork really got me. That's insane. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, is produced and edited by Mars with executive producer Anya Kenevskaia. It's engineered by Casey Donahue. With guest research by Lindsay Kemp. Our VP of content at Headgum is Katie

Moose and our theme music is arranged by Mike Komete. Ah, thanks for listening! We'll be back next week with a brand new episode. See you then! Okay, bye bye! We have a sign on our table that says, hi, be a guest on our podcast and we will pay you $1. We are the only ethical podcast. We're the only podcast that pays. We have really interesting conversations with really fun folks. Like who? Like Marilyn.

Okay. And I was somebody else's wife for a while. But the second one worked out. Well, until he died. Oh, I'm sorry to hear that. It turned out he had a double life. What? What was the second life? He is a crack addict

Hold on. How do you hide? He was a nice old Jewish guy. How did he get addicted to crack? He started smoking it. I know but I just I'm just trying to I know That was a good clip. Hey, thank you And sometimes we even have celebrity friends of ours helping us to interview these random people off the street Like who like John Hamm Adam Scott Nickroll, and Otsuko Okatsuka. So please subscribe to Podcast But Outside on YouTube and podcast apps. And then have a good time.