Why Won't You Date Me? with Nicole Byer - Proposal Gone Wrong (w/ Paul Scheer)

Episode Date: May 21, 2021

Comedian and actor Paul Scheer (The League, Black Monday) and Nicole chat about how his proposal to June Diane Raphael went terribly wrong, how June's wedding ring was stolen from her finger, and shares good wisdom on the importance of relationship building. Plus, June sits nearby, fact-checking Paul's stories. May 25th See Why Won't You Date Me LIVE featuring Drag Race S11's Miss Congeniality Nina West! Get tickets at live.nicolebyerwastaken.com. Follow Nicole Byer: Upcoming Tour Dates: linktr.ee/nicolebyerwastaken Twitter: @nicolebyer Instagram: @nicolebyer Merch: https://www.teepublic.com/stores/nicole-byer?ref_id=964 Nicole's book: www.indiebound.org/book/9781524850746

Oh, boy, I'm doing a live Why Won't You Date Me Tuesday, May 25th at 5 p.m. Pacific, 5, 6, 6, 7, 7, 8 p.m. Eastern. My guest was titled Miss Congeniality on RuPaul's Drag Race Season 11. You'll never guess. It's Nina West. We're going to chat. We're going to do an audience Q&A at the end. And listen, if you can't make the live show, the broadcast will be available for up to a week later to watch. Check the episode notes for the ticket link or check the link in my dang bio. Why won't you date me? Why won't you date me? Why won't you date me? Please tell me why! Oh baby, welcome to another episode of Why Won't You Date Me, a podcast where me, Nicole Byer, tries to figure out how I'm still single.

Even though you could take me up in a hot air balloon and push me out, I would still date you. My guest today, oh boy, I'm very excited. You've seen him on Black Monday. You've heard his voice on Big Mouth. You've seen him in Veep, Fresh Off the Boat. Oh boy, he's got podcasts, Unspooled, How Did This Get Made? He was the executive producer on a little watched show called Party Over Here. He's the husband to June Diane Raphael. It's Paul Scheer. I am so excited to be here.

What a great introduction. And I want to talk about one thing that you just said immediately, which is you said if someone pushed you out of a hot air balloon, you would still date them. And I once shot something in a hot air balloon, a sketch for Human Giant. And we were up there with a real hot air balloon guy. And we said to him like, what's the main clientele that you get? And he's like, well, mostly proposals. We normally bring people up here to do that. And we're like, well, what happens if it goes badly?

And he goes, oh, it happens a lot, a lot more than you think. They get up in a hot air balloon. Now, the thing with a hot air balloon is like, it really is in control. The wind controls the balloon. It's not like, so he's like, it's so hard because it will go bad.

And then I have to figure out how to get us down quickly, but I can't get us down quickly because the balloon, like we need to land in the right spot. He's like, it is spot he's like it is he's like it's the most panicked i ever am because i'm also supposed to not be there like he's like i try to blend into the background and it's a basket that is maybe like two feet by four feet so you can't really hide and so he's like but he's trying to make himself real small like the idea of that moment like it doesn't go well and then the balloon guy like oh there's a field there's a

field we can get that field right now that's so funny to think about i guess people never think past i'm proposing well if you do a public proposal you're involving somebody else oh it's a lot and i know that there's like people who hire like these photographers to go like take pictures of them while they do it i'm glad i didn't do that for my proposal because like i think what i realized with proposing is it should be well okay for me i liked it that it was a private moment right because i want to make a big grand statement because it's like i don't need to bring everybody in on that like i'll have a party we'll do all that other stuff but like in that one moment you are making a giant commitment you're saying something like i don't need everyone to pop out of the bushes with champagne like i want to celebrate with the person that i'm with

and when i did it with june um you know i always know with june and my time dating her and everything being with her that I can't get her to a second location. It's never like dinner and a movie. It's like dinner or a movie. And so we really lucked out right before quarantine started where we found places that served dinner and a movie at the same time. So the whole day that I knew I was going to propose, I was like, we're going to go to this dinner at this great restaurant. And, oh, you know what? On the way back home, I want to stop at this one spot.

And I knew I had to seed that early in the day because if I had any attempt at getting her to the second location, I really needed to make sure that it was not a surprise. And, you know, as it turned out, we had our dinner. And then I was like, oh, I really want to bring you to this place. And she was like, oh, I'm tired. I knew. And I was like oh i'm tired i knew and i was like oh no i said well please come on come on and uh and we go and it was it was this beach at night and what happens at this beach at night was like there's like all these like giant bonfires it's really beautiful and we found our own little nook and cranny away from a lot of people and i asked him to propose which is a whole story but that at the end well tell it all right all right come on give me the dirt give me the juice so i guess i

i guess i may have here's the thing we were not one of those couples that like talked about getting married before we did it uh we were not one of those couples that like talked about getting married before we did it uh we were not one of those couples that like went and picked out a ring like i know that a lot of couples like this is the ring i want if you're ever going to do it like do it with this ring um i woke up one morning and we had been going out for a long time and i was like i think i want to like marry june and i didn't never really had that thought in my head. Like, like not in the sense of like, I did not think I just, you know, it just kind of like, it felt like really organic. And, and I remember thinking to myself, like, all right, I love this

feeling. I'm into this feeling. Let me give it a month and let me see where I am in a month. And like, I don't know, a month and, and like, see where I'm at. And, you know, and, and a month passes and I feel the exact same way and and maybe even then that month like looking at it and and being more confident in my decision and i start you know and i start going looking for a ring and i do this whole thing and in many respects very much without june as part of the equation uh you know um and so when I brought her down to this beach, I proposed to her. And her reaction to me was anger. Anger.

And she was like, what the fuck are you doing? She's watching me right now. She's watching me tell this story. She's in the other room looking. But she was angry at me, thought it was a bit. Because I had done. You brought up marriage never, not once. Okay. As she said over here, she said,

I never brought up marriage not even once. And I think what made it worse was, you want to come and just like pop in and just say... All right, I'm listening. All right, so she's listening. She goes, I'm listening. She said, I never brought up marriage once. I think what made it worse for you, June,

was that you had lunch with your friends that week and you literally said to your friends like i don't think we're gonna get married yes and every time i brought up marriage you said i think you weren't into it you said a number of times this is not true and she said i said a number of times i was not into marriage i didn't say that i just didn't you know look i didn't know if it was a necessary uh part of the equation but i wasn't like against marriage it was not against you want to come you want to stand far away it's an audio podcast tell june to come on over just come on you're not going to be on camera yeah there you go yeah nicole hi june hi my love i am doing some just like

light fact checking okay from the other room i like it i love it i want to hear your side of this now well i know i'm not a guest but i just kind of come in real quick and say because i do feel like i've just to justify my reaction i genuinely just please know nicole that he had never once not a single time we've been together for six years not a single time had brought up thank you six years had never brought up wanting to be married that's not true when it babe it went so i when i say i was stunned we talked about having kids yes but i thought we were going to be like a goldie hawn kurt russell you know which i had like reconciled and so i was really and i was much more positive about the idea and he never not once said it was something he was interested in so please just know that

when you hear what my reaction was because i was genuinely how do you remember doing a bit how do you yeah and then my anger was like my anger honestly like, I felt that he had left me out. I, okay. I feel like this is a valid reaction. I would also, in six years of somebody never mentioned marriage, I'd be like, great. We're not going to do that. And then they propose. They'd be like, well, go fuck you.

This is not it. Fuck you very much. Absolutely. And I felt, I felt very angry, well, go fuck you. This is not it. Fuck you very much. Absolutely. And I felt very angry. Do you remember how you reacted? Yes. I was yelling at you and screaming at you. And I was mad, mad, mad.

I popped up. I popped up from my unbended knee because it seemed like it was going south real quick. I felt like I was in that hot air balloon. And now I feel badly. But I i'm like but at the same time and he said something beautiful that night which was like i definitely wanted to do this gesture but from here on out we make every decision together because i felt like i was not a part of it you know and it felt very strange and i gotta say though i here's the thing and and and for all your listeners who are out there who have done this it's no slight on you i just didn't want

to do that thing where we agree that we're i'm going to ask you then we look at the ring together and then i like drop it on you at some point i think that's a little like i wanted a little bit of that surprise now did it was it a surprise i did that i did that why i did ask i did ask her dad i did all the traditional yeah that was it seemed like it was all behind your back it was that's how it's supposed to be right isn't that the thing it's not like it's like i bought a house or used her credit cards. I felt betrayed. And that's how you're supposed to start holy matrimony, by being betrayed. Exactly.

The feeling of betrayal and upsetment. Okay, Nicole, I love you. Be well. I love you. I've got one ear on this conversation, so I'll come in again if I have to. Yeah, I should pop in. If I have to. I love it thank

you june um so when we were on the beach and and then that the initial like response kind of subsided uh we you know we did kiss and we were like just you know there in this moment of like a little bliss and all i hear is this voice from the distance get a room and it was like a 12 year old kid on a sand dune like watching this whole thing we never saw him like but he was like watch the whole thing happen get a room and it was the best ending of that night's proposal of just like having that kid underscore and that is why i i think by the way also june's reaction is why i believe that everyone should do it privately because actually i think we were able to like we were able to like reconcile all these things we

actually had a really nice night and we took like that night into i think like maybe the midpoint of the next day before we even told anybody. And that was actually, that was kind of great. Like, we had, like, our time to do it. And I feel like that's my word of advice to anybody out there that is planning on getting married. And take a long shot. You know, maybe the ring won't be perfect. You can always switch it back. You can figure out the return policies. Get a new ring. Yeah, it's not a permanent thing. Yeah, but it's nice. Did you have to get a new ring?

No, she liked my ring. Oh, okay. She liked it very, very much. She liked it very, very much. And it was stolen recently right off her hand. Wait, how? What? She was shooting a movie, Longshot, and they were shooting, I forget, I feel like they were shooting

in Columbia. I could be wrong. They were shooting in some area that was far away and she was getting on a boat and some man who was helping her get on the boat, like, oh, let me help you. I'll hold your hand as you get on the boat. And in that moment, just pulled that ring right off. And so then I had to go. And so what I did, here's another thing that I did in secret. She told me that she was so upset about it. So the minute I hung up the phone with her, I frantically called the place where I bought the ring. And I was like, can I find it?

And then now the place that I bought it, they had closed down, but there was another one in Texas and I found it. And they're like, well, we have this one, but we don't, it's not the exact same style, but then we, we searched for it. I found it. I got it shipped to me. I got the ring and I was able to give her a, I would say actually, um, a plus up version of the ring. I got her. It's still, it's still like it's better, but it is the same ring. Yeah. I love that. That's so sweet that you did that. And honestly, it's good advice for anyone who wants a different ring, but doesn't know how to tell their partner. Have someone in Colombia steal it. Right off your finger. But by the way, that's why I don't actually travel a lot with my

wedding ring on. She didn't realize it was happening at the time. She's stunning. She realized he gave her a firm grip. i mean not these are details that i feel like i've covered uh but the but uh i think i knew it was happening okay yeah i don't think i was alluding to the fact that you understood you're getting uh robbed uh the the she um but how did you guys meet because you guys fit together so well. We do. I love her so much. Um, we met at the UCB theater, which was in New York city at the time. Um, well, it still is in New York city. She was coming out of NYU. She had done this really hilarious show at NYU that Owen Burke, the artistic director, had seen there. They were both in classes, taking classes. But this show was like the talk of the town, her and Casey Wilson. And they came over to UCB. And they were asking some of the people in the comedy community to kind of watch and just give them notes. Because they were coming more from, they'd just done a really funny show

out of NYU. And then they were going to go to the Aspen Comedy Festival. So I had seen their show and I went backstage to give notes or thoughts or whatever, or just say hi, actually. That was actually it because I was going to go have lunch with them to give them some thoughts. And June completely like gave me, like just blew me off.

Like really was like, not like, and not even rude, just like had no time to even just a nice greeting like I was invited there to do this it wasn't like I was like let me give you some notes right so she kind of blew me off so I had a nice relationship with Casey there but then we went out to lunch and we had both kind of gotten out of these long-term relationships and we were being single for the first time i think at that point maybe june was in the middle of like a kind of a short-term relationship i think

i was i was kind of playing it when i talked to her a little bit more loose because i kind of liked her but i didn't know where i should be where i should be saying i was and then that kind of developed into like a year-long back and forth where it was very like new york city-esque which i love like we would see each other at parties and then we would go leave the party and then go get dinner and hang out and then you know stay out until all hours of the night but then like not kiss or anything like that but then like i think we were both leaving going like oh but we were also dating people too so it wasn't like we weren't doing anything weird we're just kind of like we kept on meshing and we lived very close to each other or we grew up very close to each other

we were friends june saying we were friends we were friends we were friends and so it just kind of grew organically and then there came a point where we both weren't dating anybody and then it just kind of uh it worked out although let me tell you this nicole this is the worst this is the worst part of the story and i'm sorry i feel like i've not let you really even ask a question yet it's okay i just like hearing about it i one of my favorite things is listening to someone talk about their partner that they really love oh because it radiates and you're like it just like i've, I haven't stopped smiling. Like, I like hearing about it. Well, I, I, I enjoy telling it. So we, all right.

So June and I were in this zone where we couldn't quite just figure out like what we were. Right. And it was sort of like, cause it was a little bit more than friends, but it wasn't in a way, you know what, it was just a weird middle ground. So we decide to go out to dinner, like let's go out to dinner. And I felt like that was going to be a little bit more of a date. We're going to go out to dinner and we're going to go dancing at this place called Don Hills, which is like this dance club, like they did an 80s night or whatever it was. And we went out to dinner and we're having a great, like a great time. Like it was like,

oh, this is working. This is not like after a night out. Like we made an intentional plan. We're having a great time. It's really working out great. And then my friend who was dating one of her friends, they both came in because they were going to join us for dancing. They were drunk. They were like happy hour drunk and they came down, changed the whole mood, right? Because all of a sudden, like we're having this like sweet romantic kind of time. And then they're like happy hour drunk and they came down changed the whole mood right because all of a sudden like we're having this like sweet romantic kind of time and then they're like whoa this party and then two drunk people yeah so we're like okay and then we kind of get on that zone and we're we go to this dance club and we are having fun we're actually having fun like we're

dancing we're doing everything and then um what happens here is this is how i see it my friend comes back to me it's like hey just so you know she's not really into you she likes you as a friend but that's about it and i was like oh and it was like a dad like nicole it was like a dagger that like went through like because imagine like having the best date and then be like no everything that you've felt is not it's this cause it's like, imagine like having the best date and then be like, no, everything that you've felt is not, it's, this is,

it's a tease right now. Oh, and I got like, it just gutted me. Here's you standing over my shoulder again. I feel, I see the eyes watching. Well,

but yeah, but it's not your fault. So, so she, so I feel gutted. if you want to just i mean the standing over my shoulder is making me nervous okay um so i feel gutted here and here's the moment that was a good moment for me which was i made a very conscious decision i said you know what i'm having such a good time tonight and i'm having such a good time with her

my normal instinct would be to go home. I would be like, pack my shit, get out of here. I'm embarrassed myself. I'm a fucking idiot. I'm done. And I didn't, I was like, you know what? I had this like moment of Zen where I was like, this is fun. I'm having a good time. Okay. She didn't like me, but you know what? This is fun. Why would I leave something that is fun? And I continued to dance with her and we had a great time and there was no energy that was like, oh, she's not into me, but there was, but I was just, and I just kind of went with it. And then we walked home and that was the night that we had our first kiss.

And I was shocked because when it all went down, I was like, wait, what's going, wait, wait, hold on, because I had already adjusted myself to this new reality. So then it was, it took us a while to connect our stories and find out that our two friends went to the bathroom. They were both playing coy for both of us. So was like does he like her and she was like i don't know does she like him i don't know i think they're like friends so they both screwed us over because they both knew that we both liked each other but they were trying to hold their cards close so they basically sent us both signals that we were not interested in each other and wait a minute are you still friends with these

people we are we are and i think it's i know i think but i don't think it was done intentionally with malice i think it's like one of those things where hey look you're younger and you feel like oh i don't want to review my friend as being into somebody but if i would have went home it would have been i would never have reached out to june again really i would have just you know but i stuck it through and I stuck it through. And she stuck it through. And we walked home together. I'm so glad we did.

Because that really then, I mean, it made it more confusing. Because I was like, well, what does this mean? And I didn't want to. That was like, it was a pregnant pause. And then we kind of figured it all out. But yeah, that was a real, that was a tough moment. We got through that moment. Both those people were at our wedding. So they did come to our wedding.

They shouldn't have been. I would have been been like the wedding might not have happened because of you people i know but isn't it funny like how that kind of stuff can happen like you because you can i think you're so vulnerable when you are dating and you don't want to like open yourself up too much because i think maybe it's a high school thing maybe it's like a middle age thing or i mean a middle school thing where you're like if she knows i like her i'm weak or i'm this or you know and you feel like you're so vulnerable and i feel like your friends do that like they do kind of like get in the way or build you up or take you out like well don't don't who cares don't do it like they can almost talk you out of a a good relationship because they're protecting you from being too vulnerable, I think,

or some level, something like that. I don't know. I think that makes sense. I'm the opposite. I'm like, oh, you seem to like me. Great. I love you. Whether I actually like them or not, I'm like, okay, you like me. This is good for me. Wait, how long have you guys been together total? I think we're at total over over 15 years that's such a nice long time yeah it's a long long time like we dated for six we've been married for 10 yeah we had our 10 year anniversary last year this year is our 11th year yeah so like yeah 15 16 years we just had our anniversary of our first date in january so we have all these like little i mean we didn't

either of us acknowledge it. It's in our calendar. And I heard June acknowledge it to somebody else, but we didn't acknowledge it to each other. But yeah, we did like a nice thing for our 10 year anniversary. It's pretty amazing. And I think I got into trouble with this because I was talking to somebody about like love and the whole idea of like what love is. And I think like, like, I think there's like three or I don't know, three, like there's a stage of love where it is like that lust. Like when you're first like into somebody where you're just like, I want to fuck, I want to like have fun. I want to like, this is the person. Like, and that is awesome. And that will fade ultimately however long,

I mean, you know, and then you have to go a little bit deeper right you have to be like well what else is here because we have to continue and you can have that kind of big attraction and then it's got to dwindle down and it's it's so funny because we were talking about like the relationships that make the biggest impact on you like sometimes you know it's sort of like well i wouldn't compare the love that i have with j June to something that was like a fleeting thing. But sometimes those fleeting things can hold like a very strong part in your memory. Like, I don't know if you've ever like had like a hookup or, or had a very short term thing, but you're like, oh, in my, in my pantheon of relationships, that one is above the other ones.

And I was trying to figure out like what, what is because obviously nothing tops the june but there are these things that you look at your career of of dating you're like oh right there there were these things and it's all different lengths like sometimes a long relationship i was in i wouldn't put in that pantheon oddly enough interesting yeah it's sort of like i think a way it makes you feel or something like that i don't know are you a serial monogamous do you go from relationship to relationship um ish or did you did i like i guess i mean it's been so long uh i definitely i definitely dated i would have like i think about a year break in between relate like a long relationship but then i was in like i think i am very selective about who i like because i think i see it and this is so i don't mean to see it like this but i feel

like i see it almost like a chess game in a way like i'm like looking at it too analytically so i'm not like into a super casual thing like i've um and like i'm like oh i don't like that person that that thing rubs me the wrong way i don't't know. I can't, I can't do it. And it's not like it's a, it's a myriad of different factors, but I feel like between my long-term relationship that I was in for a while. And then before dating June, I definitely was like a lot more, uh, I'm going to date and it'd be fun. And it was actually, it was fun, but it was like, it was a little bit unfulfilling. Honestly, that's for me again, it was like a little bit like, okay, it was fun, but it was like, it was a little bit unfulfilling. Honestly, that's for me again, it was like a little bit like, okay, it was fine. But it wasn't like, I was like, oh, I didn't really, there wasn't anybody in there that was like, that made me like, be like, oh, I want like,

and I guess what I felt like in that time was I felt people like sometimes being like, oh, I want this to be more than what it is. And that was really hard for me. So I feel like that was made me like back off. Cause I was like, I don i felt like bad like i was giving out wrong signals or something like that and i don't know how to like i don't know how to hold that back or i don't know we're having fun but i'm not like i mean i don't want to be like that typical guy who's like oh yeah this is like you know but i'm like but that was i didn't yeah i don't know i wasn't fully in so i feel like i kind of like i tried to make myself more casual because i didn't want to give people wrong signals does that make sense i don't know that does make sense i'm very much like i don't like casual things i would prefer if after the second date of someone was like i don't see

this going anywhere to just be like nicole i don't see this going anywhere we can hang out and fuck or like we could be done depending on like what you need but people don't talk like that and i wish they did we need it like who will re-protect that's exactly how i feel like honestly like that like i went on a lot of like one or two dates and it was like and some people i'm friends with still to this day and it was great and it's great and but you're right like i think that there i think there also needs to be like that like a clearer delineation of like the fuck buddy relationship role and i think people are so like you really need two cool people to agree on that

like you know it's like it's like it's like an honesty that needs to be there and be like this is what we have agreed to let's go but i don't know i feel like everyone's always gonna get hurt again i've been out of the game for so long. It's even crazy that I'm like trying to even analyze dating. I'm like, yeah, you've missed out on all of the apps. I know. Let me tell you, Paul, you're not really missing anything. They're hard to navigate and everyone is bad. Well, here's the thing.

I'm obsessed with it. Like I'm obsessed with. And again, because I don't have to be on it. I'm not looking for anything on it, but I'm like, all right. So there's that one app called like Raya. I don't know if you're on Raya, right. But Raya is like, I guess it was billed as like the celebrity app or whatever, you know, it was like, and, and I would look at people's like Raya profiles and they all have to pick a song. It's like Instagram, but you had to pick a song. And it's like, what's the song that you have? And what's the picture that you have? And are you shirtless? And are you like,

like showing your best life? And I'm like, I want to go so deep in that. Like, I love that. Like, I'm like, I want to just voyeuristically look at that. And not even to make, I'm not even to make fun. I'm just like, what are people putting out there? And like, what are these conversations like? Because it's so cold. I mean, it's like cold calling. It's like when you call up for like a political candidate or something like that. But now for as a woman, are you just getting like, is it just like an immediate, like you're like creep or like, yeah, like what's the creep to like, okay, interesting conversation ratio?

Interesting conversations happen. I would say very rarely, like one out of 10 people will have something interesting to say a lot of it is like how's your week been what are your plans for the weekend and people have not adjusted it since covid and i'm like my week was boring the weekend will be more of yesterday like we're not doing anything what do you think the secret is like do you think that you need to come in like almost like like the game i don anything what do you think the secret is like do you think that you need to come in like almost like like the game i don't know if you know the game like the game like that guy who you know you game women who wore a fedora and told you to neg women like

fucking insult them and they'll love you i think here's where i think that that guy is right not in the insulting women but i think he's right in the idea of there's something i read in that book because we did a sketch on it on human giant and i got obsessed with him too i'm obsessed and i watched the show pickup artists on vh1 it was great um but i thought there was something great like he said that there was a you would go up to a girl at a bar and say oh my god do you see that fight outside and the girl would be like oh no he's like oh it's crazy there's two guys this guy and it like so you you initiate a conversation with some i mean yes it's a lie but it gets you into something like so i guess in my mind it would be like and i'm trying to figure out the non-dickish way of doing it but i can't ask you what your week is going to be like i'm not going to ask what your

weekend is but i'm going to be like hey look i just want to ask you i can't date you unless you like adventures and babysitting or like you know like like you know like some sort of a bold at least is engaging you on some level like you can come back to that on some you know i don't know is that wrong am i being totally off base or like i don't know like what the way to add it how do you get in no i think that's interesting to be like, we can go out, but you have to like this movie. I'd be like, oh, that's fun. That's a unique way to do it. For a hot second on Bumble, because the lady has to initiate,

I was asking people weird questions like, would you rather turn into a potato at midnight or ride a giraffe for six hours every Saturday? By the way, that's what i'm talking about like that that yes so that like that is like but by the way because it's something to like you can see a personality on you and the other person the way they respond it's like that's all you want right i think yes but i will tell you people would respond they would make these weird questions so boring so boring because Ugh. So boring.

Because for me, if someone was like, would you want to ride a giraffe for six hours every Saturday or turn into a potato at night? I would be like, well, what are the rules of the potato? Do I have a roommate? Yeah. Can the roommate eat me? Do I have to travel to the giraffe?

I'd be like, give me, like, it would turn into a conversation. Yeah, it's a conversation starter. Like, that's what I'm saying. Like, I would initiate that way. i always thought that that was the interesting part like you initiate in a way that like is not just like how was your day right because it's never going to be good it's the same thing with real real conversations it's like you get stuck in like part i mean parties but you and you she's been such a long time but remember a party oh boy but like you have to you do have to like work that beginning really hard i think you know and i think you know

it's like and i think you have to like find some reason to like connect and i feel like people are too like what do they want you to say like oh yeah this weekend i'm going like like you have it puts it all on you it gives you nothing it gives you nothing like they give you nothing about themselves yeah so that but it's interesting how like i feel like there's a lot of sad sacks on these things too i also think a lot of people are sad i think people are more sad in general just in this world than they care to admit yes and don't you think that this has brought this out in a way like i feel like people are almost okay with their sadness but i also think that like people are again talking about that vulnerability thing i remember my my sister-in-law told me this story and and she found this guy on

a dating site and they're talking and she's like well do you have any like dream they were out they they had progressed their relationships she's like, well, do you have any like dream? They were out, they had progressed their relationships. She's like, do you have any dreams or things you want to accomplish in life? And he said, oh man, sometimes I just sit in my car and I pretend like I'm Spider-Man and I would be like, how cool would it be if I had like webs

and I would just be able to swing over traffic? And she's like, oh, so you want to get out of traffic? He's like, yeah, it would be so cool to be able to swing over traffic and she's like oh so you want to get out of traffic he's like yeah it would be so cool to feel a swing over traffic and i was like and that to me like sums up internet dating i was like i'm like your dream is to just get out of traffic as but not like i want to be spider-man because that's okay that's that's got its whole other pandora's box issues but but i just want to be spider-man to get home quicker out of traffic very funny i just want to be spider-man to get home quicker out of traffic very funny i just want to be spider-man you know tired of sitting in my car i don't like red lights yeah

but then i'm i would truly be like that doesn't what are you gonna like web your car with you you're just gonna leave your car in the traffic yeah sir this is a very bad dream it is flawed it's like but if anyone ever asked you like what's your dream my dream that's my dream it's like well my dream i guess is to get a solid eight hours of sleep what's yours well let me ask you a question because i i i love the show i think you are absolutely fantastic as a human being. Forget you as a personality and comedian, because we all know that. You got that locked up. We don't have to worry about that.

But I'm saying as far as why won't people date you? Let me ask you two questions. First of all, do you find that, unfortunately, the world that you are in, it's tricky, right? Because you are in a comedy world, an acting world, and we see the same people a lot of the time. And there's an energy of like, I don't want to really date inside this thing,

or I have dated it. So kind of like automatically, a lot of your social hangs involve the same. It's hard to get new people in that ecosystem. Yes. So with that being said, would you you ever do and i've heard about this and i was like oh that's interesting maybe i would have done that if i was single group dating where it's like they it's like 15 people and you're all going roller skating or 15 people and you're all

going bowling so you're all single no one's putting a match together for you but you're all doing this thing you're gonna learn karate you're all gonna do wine tasting you're gonna do what whatever the group activity was i think from my other sister-in-law it was like bowling night and it's sort of and they've had some way to switch it up so you're playing with a bunch of different people throughout the whole night would you do something like that so it's kind of like speed dating just like updated yeah because it's like but like without the pressure of speed dating because speed dating is like i'm connecting with you like this is a casual like oh you said something funny here

it wasn't even necessarily towards me but i like that or like you can kind of figure out who you want to approach or pull away from and there's no one there trying to either reject you or put you know it's like this is like it creates like a fake ecosystem it like stocks the pond would you i mean and obviously you're celebrity and you know people know you but would that be something that would be appealing to you i don't think so specifically because i feel like a group setting with a bunch of people i don't know is a pressure that I don't ever want to put on myself. Okay, I hear that. Okay, that's interesting. Because I guess it's like when I go do shows, it's for a bunch of strangers, and I go,

here's the funniest thoughts I have. I hope you like them. And then it's like, okay, so I'm going to bowl with a group of people I don't know. Well, will I be good at bowling? I'm pretty competitive, so that's going to come out. Right. And then I'm like, I'm going to, I need to make these people laugh because I want these strangers to like me. How will I connect with the, I think it's just like, it's too much. So how do you like, ideally, how would you like to meet somebody?

Like what is your best way in? I guess it would be nice if like one of these dates from the apps worked out or if a friend had a friend. I've never been set up because a lot of my friends are like, well, they're single for a reason. And then, you know, people coming off a divorce, you know, they need a little bit of time. So I think it would be nice if a friend set me up with somebody can i tell you what i've noticed as as a as a straight male uh in la there are a lot of women that i know that are perfect candidates for a a girlfriend a wife or whatever a partner a partner. And the guy quality is not as high because I feel like the women who are available, like you don't go, she's single for a reason.

But almost all the guys are like, eh, I don't know. Because June will ask me sometimes, what about that person? I'm like, eh. There is an energy sometimes when you get past a 40 something and you have not locked it down on some level like that you have to be. And I know you're not that I'm just saying, but when on a guy's side, it's dangerous. It's a dangerous, because it's also like, then you're almost like, then you're almost having to like reinvent them because they're like so stuck in their ways that then you're like oh well now i'm fucked here too i gotta like you gotta do so much work it's

too much work i feel like there needs to be a better way for women to find good men and i feel like la is not the not the spot if a good man get i guess i i think good men get eaten up a lot quicker than yes then or a lot quicker than women. And that's obviously in a heterosexual relationship. I don't know how it goes any other way. But that's what I've noticed. I don't really know how it goes another way either. But I do feel like women have been taught and conditioned to be like,

get married, get married young, have kids. You got to find a man. And then men are taught to be like you can do that or you can play the field and have a very nice time you could fuck whoever you want and nobody's gonna care you're gonna be like a stallion or whatever they call gentlemen who fuck and then it's like you're a slut you sleep around you fucking slut right yeah although i have to say i've heard some guys who have been called sluts though too you get in a certain pond for a little while and people, people will talk. I will say this. There is like, you're right. Like there's this thing, like, I remember this guy,

he said to me, like I was dating June early on and I was moving out to LA. I was in New York and I was moving out to LA. And I had, at at this point i think human giant had been on or whatever best week ever whatever it was early on in my career and and he was like i can't believe that you are like dating someone right now like don't you want to like go out to la and like date a young starlet and the thought of that was like so like weirdly gross to me i was like like like it's like but like it's like do i want to date this thing that doesn't like what even what is that like what is that it's like it's like i don't like it's not like you like oh no no you would give up the person that you actually have a connection with it like you know it's not like oh wouldn't you like to date this other person that is also really cool and doesn't know just this idea of a person an idea like an idea of like and that like

that to me was oh but i feel like i've heard that conversation so many times and i've seen two of those people that have talked like that living that life to this day and they've never dated a young never dated a young starlet um and and only have heard weird stories about them uh you know uh so there uh i don't know i can't imagine dating anyone for because i feel like when people are like i want to date a young starlet it's like i want to date someone who's aesthetically pleasing to other people's eyes i might not even connect with the fucking person but i just want people to see me with this person which to me is insane uh i guess it's because i'm a fat

lady that i'm just like oh i guess i don't have a body that is like considered desirable to most so for me i'm like maybe someone won't date me because i don't want to be seen with me but i'm like i just want to be with someone who's nice and funny and like hot to me which might not be hot to everybody but that's what i think everybody is right i think it's like that that idea like it just needs to be hot to you but i think there is something interesting also probably and you've probably talked about this too like about being like a female comedian like you are you i imagine on some level are intimidating to people who might know you, right?

Know you as this thing because it's like, oh, she can cut me down. She can do this thing. Do you feel that? Do you feel like there's a little hesitancy on that level ever? Like that people are nervous to be like, oh, I don't, I'm gonna be too nerdy for her.

I'm gonna be not cool enough for her. Yeah. Well, I've had people, it's either like they're the funny ones in their relationship so like we'll have a good conversation and then like a up like a upmanship is that it yeah yeah one up one one upmanship happens where i'll say something funny they're like what about this and i'm like oh okay then but also i do improv so i'm like if that's true what else is true i i yeah i can know, heighten anything to crazy or whatever.

So then, and I felt like it was one guy in particular, I felt like would get mad at me when I said something funnier than him for the second time. And then I'd be like, all right, I guess I'd be quiet now. It was just a very tough thing to navigate. I did a talk show one time. It was like one of my first, you know, things. I was first kind of doing something

and it was, you know, a talk show host. And they were like, of my first you know things i was first kind of doing something and it was you know a talk show host and they were like okay so you go out there and if you say something funny that person might respond to you with a funny thing don't whatever you do don't say something funny after that person has said the funny thing uh-huh and i was like oh okay wow okay sure it was like warning me not to like one up or not one up but play along like when have you ever been in a conversation where you've even thought about like i'm not like okay how about this it was just like well that's the conversation we've just we're joking like i just thought that was like a funny warning like do not do if they make a joke you don't say anything don't do it that wild. Real quick, Paul, we have to take a break.

And we're back. Yes. Can I ask? So you live with June. You're married to June. You also work with June. You have a podcast together. Yes.

And you're both in comedy. And you both have had very successful careers. At any point, was it hard to work together and or did you guys get jealous of each other? That's two questions. So there you go. No, it's great. I'm going to say this. It's tricky. It's always going to be tricky in this kind of a field. But I think that as we came up together, right? So I think there are certain points in our career where, you know, maybe June was experiencing a little bit more success than I was. And then there were moments where I was experiencing some more success than

June was. And now that we've been together for such a long time, it kind of like, it kind of almost balanced out to a certain degree, like, you know, on a certain level, I think there will always be a slight, like, like if I'm being completely honest, like a slight level of like, Oh, I wish I was doing this. If you're, if you're feeling in that zone, like, cause we all get in those zones. Like I'm not working. I haven't done this thing. I haven't, I got nothing going on. Like, um, and you can get in that zone where you're, you're literally watching your partner get to do something and you're in the zone where like, ah, it's not, it's not clicking for me in this second. So yes, but at the other side of it, we're not going out for the same stuff. Right. You know, and, and that to me is really the dividing factor. And I was in a relationship before June where we were both in

comedy and we both, um, you know, know, we did so much together that our relationship became our career. And that I did not like. And that's something I would never recommend to anybody. The podcast that June and I do is so easy. You know, we basically do it in different rooms now in the quarantine of it all. But like, you know, we show up, we get to do it. It's an hour of our week or every other week, even's not even an every weekly thing and then it's over and and

so it's not like there's no work there it's fun there's no like business side to it like how did this get made we are all everyone there is equally important but i do all the i do all that other stuff i do the mini episodes i do the research i do like so i'm like so they're they basically june and jason just pop in do be hilarious and then go so they like to them and i think that's part of the the why that really works really well is because it's like it's in it's gone and we're back to our day and we get in june and i get to go away on if we get to go on tour together that's really fun because we only get a look a night out so i'll say that and i'm going to continue to answer this and say that um you know i think that when we have worked together like when when we did ntsf on uh adult swim together i was the boss and she was somebody i cast in the show and i was aware of her as that but we were not again co-creators we were not like

you know like, and she would come when she had to be on set and leave when she didn't. And, you know, and she, like, we had a respect for each other. So I think to me, the secret of that is not building yourselves together. Like, it's not like, like, and I'm impressed people who do like, when I look at like Natasha and Moshe, like, I'm like, oh, that's amazing. They get to go off and do standup together. And I actually really, it seems like it may actually work really well together. They get to do it and they're their own thing. I just feel like if you're writing everything together, if you're doing everything together, like who are you as a

performer and who are you? Cause I think what I love is being able to come home and be like, oh my God, X, Y, and Z, or this person driving me crazy. And we have separate lives. Like this morning I was out on, we were taking a walk. We're on an Airbnb right out on we were taking a walk we're on an airbnb right now and we're taking a walk and she was telling me about this thing about she was pitching me this idea that she's been working on and it felt so great not to be like a collaborator in that idea like i already know about this and we're like working it out it's just like oh that's a good idea i have fresh eyes i can give you you know feedback and notes and whatnot yeah and i can walk away from it and so that so yes so

long story short i think you would be lying to yourself you said that there's nothing there but when you're both working and you're both feeling fulfilled there's no problem and then i think it's those moments where you like hit a dry spot or like you're like are unhappy in something and you see somebody else being happy and something you're like oh fuck i want to do that i wish i was doing that i would like to go away on, you know, shoot a movie. So, you know, highs and lows. And I think the hardest thing that we ever kind of went through was, because now we have kids, like we went, when June was shooting Long Shot, we went with our amazing nanny and our two kids and we were in Vancouver and it was so cold. It was so cold that when you went outside, it was hurt to

breathe. I had no friends around. I couldn't perform. We were kind of like locked in this like apartment where the kids were riding bicycles up and down the hallway. It's a carpeted hallways because they couldn't go outside. So like that was like hard. And she was basically gone like 14 hours a day, you know, and, and, and then, you know, working late on a Friday night and sleeping in until like one or two in the afternoon. Like, so that was like, okay. And then we couldn't do anything so that felt like very trapped but but that was i would say that was like the only really like tough time because i felt like i couldn't i couldn't even like have my outlet of like going to ucb or or or working and that thing so like yeah so that's a long answer would you like to date someone who is in like a comic comedian an actor like would you have any rules i think my rule is if i were to

date a comedian or an actor i'd like to date someone who's at the same level as me just to eradicate anyone being jealous or me feeling some type of way i don't think yeah i mean i'm a human so like i do think i would be a little bit jealous if someone was a little bit further than me and right you're always gonna you're always gonna feel it. But you but you've also achieved enough right now where you are like, a thing like you are established, like, that's never gonna go away. Like you may go higher. Now, the way I want to talk to you about this. You are on a show that I'm so excited about Phil Jackson. I love Phil Jackson created the show and this cast is amazing. It's like you it's Carl T Tart, right? Echo is in it too, right? It's an awesome cast. I'm so excited about this show, but now you are

about to go on network. I mean, yes, nailed it as giant. Nailed it as giant and I know it and I know it from being on it and how people recognize me from it. I can only imagine what you get, but you are now going to be like young Sheldon you are out there for the masses there might be a poster of you in someone's room like what is that like how do you prep for that like because now you're like are you i mean i know it's like putting the cart before the horse but are you prepping at all like you're going to be a lot more in a public way even though you already are but it's more it's more it's network it's. It's also a different presentation of myself. Like it's acting.

Yeah. So that's different. And acting is like what I love. And I love comedy. I love smart comedy. I love dumb comedy. Yeah. And it's got like a mixture of all of that in there. And I love Phil so much.

And the cast is like so fun. But no, I haven't really like thought about it. Like what's going to happen after it comes out? No, I haven't really like thought about it. Like what's going to happen after it comes out other than I guess I'm just like, oh, people will see me as an actress. Right. And I think that's the most exciting thing for me. And I hope more comes from it.

I don't know. Network television is such a it's an elusive thing to me. I've never been on a network show as a series regular i've done some pilots where the network said no no no we don't want this but i'm like really fucking excited i think it's gonna be fun well you are great uh and all like i said in all those creative ways but i wonder if this podcast is gonna get a lot more interesting when that show comes on and it becomes like a thing. Like you watch these shows and like, however you like, all right, let me ask you this. Cause I don't know much about the show. I was literally before lockdown, Phil had asked me, he's like, can you come to the table read of this thing? I was like, yep,

I'll be there. And then it was like, everything shut down. So, uh, but how are you portrayed on the show? Like, what is your MO? It's like, you know what? Yeah. Like my name on it's Nikki. It's based on me. It's like, this is a great thing.

You followed the Wilson. You followed the Will Smith model, which is Will Smith said, if you ever do a TV show, name the character after yourself, because no matter what, they're always going to call you by that show. They're always remember it.

I, as someone who has been called Andre a million times from the league, I recognize that. So you good. That's already great. You're being called roughly by your same name, but if you're you, that's an ad for dating. What they're gonna get.

I do believe. I think this show, I think this show could open up doors for you in the dating world to different types of people, like a very different type of person. I didn't even think about that. Because Nailed It truly, it seems as if the people who watch it are children, parents of children, and stoners.

People who love smoking the wacky tobacco, love to watch me roll off tables. Wacky tobacco. Love to watch me roll off tables. What would you say you were a single man? This is an alternate universe. What do you respond the most to? Like how, like if a woman hit on you, what would you like the most? Oh man, that's a great, that's a great question. Or do you not like women hitting on you because you like to make the first move? Oh, no.

I mean, if you're going to offer me a woman hitting on me, I will take it 100%. I'm nervous because I never know when I'm reading a signal, when I'm not reading a signal. That was always something that I think I was very bad at when I was single. Like I was like, because people like, like I remember somebody actually said to me many years later, like, oh yeah, I always thought you didn't like me like that. I was like, oh no, I did.

I didn't get anything. I never knew, like I needed like, I was a person who needed a lot of verbal confirmation. I was like, I'm not going to go there. I'm not going to make a move that's going to make you feel uncomfortable. Because all I saw, and this is what I was saying about playing out my chess game in my head, was all the ways it would go there. I'm not going to, I'm not going to make a move that's going to make you feel uncomfortable. Cause all I saw, and this is what I was saying about playing out my chess game in my head was all the ways it would go badly. Like I would see like, if I did this, I would go

bump, bump, bump, bump, bump. And I'd see the dominoes fall for like a mile. So, um, no, I think, you know, honestly, everybody they've ever connected with, it is just, I think it's like a fun, what you're describing where someone's getting competitive with you. It's that without the competitiveness, it's like a playful fun, like we're in each other's face, not in each other's face, but like, you know, like it's like, it's like, I feel like that energy has always been good for me where it's, um, it's a little like, it's a little playful, but it's like, I don't want to say rough, but it's not like a gen, I'm not like, Oh, Hey, how are you? What kind of drink are you having? You know, like that's not,

that's like not my, my thing is like being out with people and having fun and kind of connecting and finding like a little, like, like a little like cove in a conversation. Like, Oh, like we're at a big dinner. And then we have all, we've like kind of partnered off where we go and we're walking like two feet behind everybody else is walking like those are the those are the people like because like oh i want to keep on talking to this person i feel like the people that i that i've always dated are the people that i want to talk to on the phone with

like and that is something i don't want to talk about with many people ever and in this day and age so like when i if i want to like continue a conversation and not just make it over text or i get like i'll get like um butterflies when a text comes in like that's when i know like that's like these are the things that i look out for but it is playful i think playful is the thing i like okay i could be playful i mean nicole you you are you are perfect like you like this is the thing that boggles my mind you're perfect like across the board this is the bigger mystery than cereal this show because it makes no sense i thought you meant like cereal you eat and i was like there's no mystery you put milk in it but i get it cereal the podcast because it's like we i can't figure it out look that's why i think we need to get you out of this pond

i feel like you're in a you're in you are in too small of a pond i don't think that la is a great place for dudes i think that like once you've kind of seen you have to really wait for somebody special to kind of like drop in maybe you're waiting for that divorce to happen or you're waiting for that year to pass from the door like You got to play it in such a different way. And everyone's going to be diving in on that person. That's when we need to expand the thing. Because, all right, you're beautiful, you're funny, you're successful, and you want to do fun stuff. What else would you want to do? That's all I ever want to do, fun stuff. I was going to try to import someone from Amsterdam because my friend Michelle, Michelle

Buteau, her husband's from Amsterdam. And she was like, oh, yeah, they love black women over there. And I was like, oh, OK. Get on that. So then I tried to join a dating site in the Netherlands, which I think is where Amsterdam is. I don't know. Yeah, you're right.

I should first probably learn where the place is. No, that's good. You don't need to. It's a direct flight. Just get on a flight. I joined it. I Yeah, you're right. I should first probably learn where the place is. No, that's good. You don't need to. It's a direct flight. Just get on a flight. I joined it. I filled out all the things. And then it was like, we need $30 a month.

And I was like, but I don't even know if this is legit. I had to translate the page. So then I gave up as quickly as the idea came to me. I think, look, you're going to get something weird. Because all of a sudden, you're talking about a 90-day fiance situation. We both know what's going on in that show. i i don't want to see you do that i would like to i would like to see you book some shows in the netherlands and then and then see what happens like let's do it that way let's do it the right way let's let's not get on this 30 a month thing

because then i don't want to i don't have to watch you on lifetime and then after after the 90 days before the 90 days i want to see any of that stuff. But I just love 90. No, I could never be on 90 Day Fiance. That show's too wild. It's wild. I fucking love it. It's truly a treat to watch these people be lunatics. But now you also travel around the country. Yes. And that doesn't, like people are not coming up to you after a show? Not really. For the most part, my audience isn't really like straight men i have i would say i used to

say i'd like eight straight male fans i think i have like 12 to 14 because like three or four have recently dm'd to be like i'm a straight male fan uh and my girlfriend also loves you people love to slide into my dms to tell me that them as a couple like me, or they love me, but they're a game in and I don't have the parts that they want. But and I never get dick pics. I used to get dick pics from this one man who had a whole family, which was so strange to me, he would send them. And then I clicked on his little icon. And I was like, Wait, you're posting pictures of your family and your wife and how much you love her. But then you're sending me your slightly mediocre dick i don't know nobody slides my dms well first i have two questions here is there any this is a question i think only well i don't know if you can answer

it because you maybe don't have enough experience with it are there any good dick pics is there is is it possible to take a good day i don't think that that's a photograph that ever is going to be looking good. I think a good dick pic is not just the penis. I think it's like a playgirl or like a tasteful nude. Like that Geraldo Rivera one where he was in the – or what he was going for in that shot. Was that like a mirror selfie? Yeah, yeah. And he had a lot of muscles.

But it was not the right person but the right post all right the other the other thing was this i get that all the time with june i will have so many women tell me that june is their crush so i am basically fielding a lot of uh gay women who are just like tell your wife that i love her and i'm like oh i will i am happy, but I also feel like they might take me out. That's funny. That must feel nice to be like, Oh, my partner's wanted by so many people and I get to have her. I got her. I got her. But you know what? I think that back to everything, like, you know, it's, we talked about this the other day too like the idea like yes it is amazing to be in a great relationship but it's not easy and i think that like i think that there's like this fat like this people are so i think people get out of relationships because

they think well it's not fun anymore it's like of course it's not fun because the work comes in and the work is what you need to continue to build and it gets not that it gets it it's more fulfilling and it's better and there are so much fun so many fun moments in it but it's not like just an autopilot thing like and i feel like you know and i think that like one of the best things about june and i i and um she's not over my shoulder but she would i think agree to it is that we would we can and we do fight and i think that people who don't fight i'm always worried about why are you not fighting you're living with this person you're with this person you can fight and you can also fight and not be afraid that you're going to lose this person like

you know and and and i think that that and i think that but fighting is part of like working the issues out figuring out what's going on but being respectful of each other and sometimes maybe you're not and but you have to i think you have to like dig in and it gets uncomfortable and there and i will say in the 15 or 16 years we've been together like there have been patches where you're like okay this has been a rough patch i would even say like here's like three or four months that have just been like okay fine i mean it's like i don't never stop loving her with all my heart but it's like it's not clicking right now it's like it's being a little bit like okay we're just getting through and that's okay and then it and then it pulls back up like i think your cycles of everything go like through that you know and

again it's not again 15 years in like it's a different level like we're not clicking it's just sort of like uh you're like okay yeah we're just on each other's case a lot right now and what is it and you have to figure out what that is. And then you figure it out. And then you fix it and you move on. Yeah. I mean, it's nice to hear that, like, it is hills and valleys. And that's something to expect.

But, Paul, we've come to the end. Oh, my gosh. I ask all my guests this. Would you date me? Oh, Nicole, I've already said it. A hundred percent. on we've like there's nothing there's nothing to debate it's a this is i'm i'm now obsessed with finding somebody who who look you i think the world is your oyster honestly i do you have single friends i told you

no no one that you need to be with um no i that you know honestly i have to say that my only single friend i only have one left one left i believe yeah is that right yeah one holy cow jason manzoukas that's it has he been on this show he hasn't been on this show because uh actually well i'm gonna tailor a show for him because he was like, I don't really want to talk about my personal dating life. And I was like, that's fine. I've had like two episodes where I knew that they didn't really want to talk about their dating life. So I asked like one question and then was hit with like an answer that circumvented it. And I was like, all right, cool.

So I was like, I'm just going to figure out how to – I'm going to like tailor an episode for him because I think he's so funny and so wonderful. He's the best. But again, he's somebody to work with. So it's tricky or some work with occasionally. Nicole, this has been such a pleasure. You're the best. Thank you. And if I find somebody, I'm going to, I'm going to let you know.

But I think this is a child crying. Do you got to go? I feel like this is going to be, that's my execute. I'll let you go. I'll do the outro by myself. Bye Paul. Bye. I feel like this is going to be my execute.

I'll let you go. I'll do the outro by myself. Bye, Paul. Bye. If you like that episode of Why Won't You Date Me, you can like, you can subscribe, you can rate it five stars on Apple Podcasts. And if you send me something hitting on me, I'll read it. This person said, Hi, Nicole. I've been trying to think of a clever way to hit on you for a while, and I finally got it.

I set up a time to meet at your house late at night. My spouse and I will come in the night. Fuck you so good, you pass out. You'll wake up in the morning feeling sore between your legs, but not from having a lot of memories from the night before. Uh-oh. Uh-oh. You will start to think to yourself, did I just get fucked by ghosts? Okay, maybe not that clever, but I tried. You know, that was, it got a little dicey for me at a set, like a moment where I didn't

know what was happening, but then it was ghosts. I get what you were trying to do. Um, I think it's okay. Okay. Bye-bye. That's it for Why Won't You Date Me with me, Nicole Byer. Why Won't You Date Me is produced and engineered by, oh, the sweetest woman I know, Marissa Melnick. It is executive produced by other wonderful people, Adam Sachs, Joanna Solo-Taroff, and Jeff Ross.

Thanks for listening. I love you. Thank you so much. We'll be seeing you next Friday with a brand new episode. What a dream. What a dream. Ha, ha ha ha. Ha ha ha. This has been

a Team Coco production.