Why Won't You Date Me? with Nicole Byer - Sugar Daddies (w/ Sugar & Spice)

Episode Date: May 26, 2023

Twin drag queen icons Sugar & Spice (RuPaul's Drag Race S15) join Nicole for a conversation about why you can't skirt around the law of attraction, to spilling the tea on the sugar baby lifestyle and how to shine as a high-value woman in today's dating scene. And if you've ever wondered what it's like for twins to audition for Drag Race, Sugar & Spice pull back the curtain on their journey, talking about their impressions of Snatch game, including the unforgettable meltdown Spice had on-set after Sugar's unexpected elimination. Plus, Nicole reveals a sweet tip on how to score free drinks on a bad date.  Hungry for more drag queen interviews? Check out our drag episode playlist on Spotify: bit.ly/wwydmdrag Write something dirty to Nicole! Submit your dirty pick-up lines, dating stories, or questions to [e-mail] for a chance to have it read on-air. Follow Nicole Byer: Twitter: @nicolebyerInstagram: @nicolebyerMerch: podswag.com/datemeNicole's book: indiebound.org/book/9781524850746

Why won't you date me? Why won't you date me? Why won't you date me? Please tell me why! Oh baby! Welcome to another episode of Why Won't You Date Me? A podcast where me, Nicole Byer, is just trying to explore love and shit because I used to try to figure out why I was single, but nobody's answered it.

I don't know. My guests today, ooh, baby, I've talked about them a lot. I love them so much. You know them from Where's My Intro? Just the whores down the street. That's all you need to know. Two whores from down the street who are also TikTok sensations who competed on RuPaul's Drag Race Season 15. They made Drag Race herstory as the first identical twin contestants on the show.

They stole our hearts. I love them. Oh, my favorite. My favorite. Here we go. Sugar and spice. Hello. Hi, hi, hi. Thank we go. Sugar and spice. Hello. Hi, hi, hi.

Thank you so much for being here. I genuinely love both of you so much. I love the trot. I liked everything that they were like, we don't like. And I was like, but why? Do you not like fun? Right. Well, you have taste.

So thank you. Thank you. Oh my God, I have taste. But I will say the love is so mutual because we have been, I don't even know if you know how hard we have stand for the past couple of years. And even before we got here, I was like, wait, we have to get the story straight. How did we even discover Nicole? Well, obviously Girl Code.

Cause you know. Well, of course. Well, yes. Well, yes. Yeah. That's a Lux. So allegedly, well, it's not allegedly. Lux like is a walking encyclopedia of references.

And memes. So she told Rue on the final thing. She said, well, yes. And I was obsessed. And apparently it's from Tokyo Tony doing an interview. And the internet has just got a little clip of her. They're like, well, are you bi? Are you gay?

And she's like, well, yes. And so we just keep saying it. It's another bit. Well, yes. But anyway, so I realized, I think it was on a random drag race sort of podcast you did years ago. And you were so funny. You were doing this thing. You were like, you were predicting who like your favorites were going to be.

And you were like, I'll peg her forth and I'll peg her towards the rest. And I was like, and then Sugar was like, oh, she has her own podcast. Why won't you date me? And then we started getting hooked and we would always be doing our wigs and teasing while we listened to you. I love that. That's so nice. Literally years, because we were just doing drag in our room. I need a long-form content.

That's why I'm such a podcast girly. And I was like, no one was giving like you. I heard a pegger and an applebee's, and I was like, this bitch is funny. So obsessed. Thank you. Wait, do you consider yourself bedroom queens who then transcended? Yeah. Kind of, yeah.

But I haven't really transcended yet. Like, in my mind, I like, because we're character queens, essentially. So it's like, in my mind, I love the image of Sugar and Spice. Kind of an Alice in Wonderland moment when, like, you know, the guy grows ten sizes and is in the room. Just like these dolls stuck in the suburbs. They've never experienced real life. And then they step out every once in a while. Very life-size.

So I'd like to say Drag Race, like, we stepped out into the real world and we're like, this is how the other half lives. And then, like, we slowly transcended back into our room. And then, you know, maybe soon we'll come out. You never know. Okay. Do you want to know what else? Okay. We will be going on all the tangents.

I always say, like— This is why I like YouTube. I think it's fun. I think it's like... I don't know. It's like improv. You follow the fun. You two are very fun.

Yes. Okay. Here's a question. Are you two single? Are you dating? Who's to say? Okay. Well, this will be fun because Miss Spice is definitely...

I am in a relationship for the past two years. Oh. Oh. But Sugar is the fun single one. So we have a great cheer. Wait, Spice, how did you meet your partner? So we met over two years ago. It was actually during the COVID era.

It was like fall of 2020. Okay. In New York. I don't know if you've ever been to $3 Bill, this iconic. I have. It's in Brooklyn, right? Yes, in Brooklyn. I would love to see you running around with your top off there. That would be bucket gold.

Yes. I did that in my early 20s. You're not in your early 20s now? No, I'm very old. I'm 62. Well, maybe not top off. Maybe just like nipple pasties and like some tassels and shimmy. I could do nipple pasties. I think I could do that.

My titties won't jiggle because I'm wearing a sports bra today. What a choice. You met your partner at your boyfriend. Oh yes, yes. I met my boyfriend at a $3 bill at this crazy club in Brooklyn and Sugar actually, it was from like a mutual friend. There wasn't much people in the club. There was like 30 people at the party.

Because it was one of our drag queen friends Ruby Fox and she was having this party, but it was like, only, like, Wait, during the pandemic? Yes. Of course, yes.

But it was only, but it was only, like, it was a big club, but only, she invited only, like, 20 people. Oh, okay. And you had to be,

like, spayed the whole thing. Yeah, so, you know, regulations, rules were, yeah, were met. And Sugar made me come outside. We had a mutual friend, and she was like,

oh, come out here and I was like okay and then there was Michael and we just started talking and we talked every day since so I love it

but the thing is though is I wasn't looking for a relationship oh my god that's what everybody says I wasn't looking I just fell right into my lap and I'm like

okay I'm always looking for dick like so when so what like I just stop wanting it? You just have to sit on it. I would love to sit on it. I'm so horny right now. Just accidentally sit. Just trip and fall on a dick.

I will say, though, it kind of was. Literally, yeah, just stop looking for it. Because it's kind of like law of attraction. You can't go against law. Yeah, you can't go against law. It's just why talent always wins because you can't go against law. So, you can't go against law. It's always law. It's just why it's like talent always wins because you can't go against law. So it's like even if you really like this, I was turning into a therapist or whatever. I love it.

But it's like the second you, it's just anything in life. If you really, really want something, you're basically telling the universe you don't have it. Because you don't want something that you already have, if that makes sense. So if you just come from the place of I already have it, then it will be. But it's like, how do you, that's like the most stupid advice. Like, what do you mean I have to pretend I already have a boyfriend to get a boyfriend? Okay, I think I get it. So with my career, I've just been like, oh, it's going to happen.

Like, things will happen. I'm funny. I work hard. Whatever. I've never been like, oh, it's going to happen. Like things will happen. I'm funny. I work hard. Whatever. I've never been worried about it. But with a man or a partner, I'm like, well, is it going to? Am I worth it? You know what?

Once, me, I haven't even been in a relationship. So it's like you're taking advice from like the girl down the street, like makeup advice, and she's wearing half a lash. Well, yeah. Well, it's true. I think it's just like a scarcity mindset if you come from oh my god it's kind of like

we always say you're the story that you tell so if your story that you're telling people is oh no no one wants to date me oh well

and that's what it would be you know that's what it would be but if you're like well no one wants to date me but there's that one person that does and they're

waiting for me. I'm not waiting for them. And it's gonna happen any day now. I'm not even looking. They're looking for me, sweetie. Then it's like, oh, okay, well then, they're just gonna pop up. Wait, I really like this. And honestly, I've done this podcast, I think for six years, and I don't think anyone has said that. To just like,

not like fake it till you make it, but just kind of claim it, and then like fake it till you make it but like just kind of like claim it and then like live your life like you have it yeah so it's kind of being like people other people would say it's delusional but it's not for you because you're just living your truth yeah but i'm also delusional like with my career i would walk into a room with like eight women who looked identical to me and i'd be like i'm the best i'm i'm better of all these ladies who look exactly like me so okay apply. Apply that mindset. Honestly, nowadays, dating is like an audition.

The girls are giving 21 questions. Good advice I got the other day because of me entering slowly back into a dating era now that— Are you trying to date? No, I'm doing more of observing and learning and collecting data. Okay. The girls are collecting data. We've got a Harriet the Spy here. No, we always say that.

Sugar will go out living her best life all day with my boyfriend, and she'll come back and kind of spill the tea. For revelations on human nature. Oh, sweetie, I was just collecting data. I went out and I was getting my data, and I was like, wait, no, literally, you got data. You got data. That's the really I was getting my data and I was like, wait, no, literally, you got data. You got data. That's the really positive if you change your mindset

because a lot of people are like, I'm single, no, no one wants me. Dating is actually such a positive thing because you have an advantage over someone that is taken

because you, you know, maybe on a Friday night, oh, we got eating Ben and Jerry's and watching old drag race, whatever, you know, whatever it goes with us,

I need to. But when you're single, you're entering, like you're basically increasing that rate of just human interaction that you normally wouldn't get. And any chance to be with some crazies or whatever, that's another chance to learn about yourself. And then those questions come up of, oh, well, this person's kind of making me,

like me, a problem I've been going through recently is I feel good by myself. I'm such an independent person. I'm in my career. I'm in my vortex. But sometimes when I'm with other people socially, not even like romantically, you start to get in your head and maybe that old story comes back of, oh, I'm not worthy. They think I'm weird. I'm awkward. Why did I say that? You're re-tripping up all your words. So I love when that happens. I can kind of take a minute to reevaluate. I'm weird. I'm awkward. Why did I say that? You're re-tripping up all your words. So I love when that happens. I can kind of take a minute to reevaluate. I'm like, why did that make me feel insecure?

Or when I was with this person at this party, normally I'm so secure with myself. Now why am I like, wait, is he looking at other? Like all those things come up and then it's like, okay, we're digging now. We're getting to the source of the problem. And then it's always an entryway to the problem. And then you're like, okay, we got it now. We're getting to the source of the problem. And then it's always an entryway to the problem. And then you're like, okay, we got it. I never do that. I'm never like, why did this person make me feel this way?

I'm always like, oh, no. I feel bad. And it's me. I did it. I feel bad because I'm dumb. So maybe I got to take a step back and be like, why did this person on this date make me feel like this? Why did I react like that?

Oh, my God. Just analyze the data. This is great. I'm going to analyze the data. But don't overanalyze. That could get bad. Because I think everyone has those moments. Even now with dating where you hang out with friends and you go back home and you're like, oh, my God, I said something weird and that didn't land.

But no one's thinking about it. I have never hung out with friends and thought about what Miss Jenny was saying about that. Like why would I, you know. Yeah, that is funny because I will go home

and be like, God, that was weird. Why did I say that? But I've never been like, my friend said something weird. What do they mean by that? I'm like, you said,

like in the moment I'm like, that was weird. Yeah. Oh, you're not going home and thinking about it. Yeah, no. Here's my question

for you, Miss Nicole. Okay. So, I feel like Spice can't relate because she's the taken one, but do you feel like you almost have to have a script of if you're on a new date, you're meeting new people, you kind of have to give your elevator pitch of

what would be your elevator pitch if we were on a first date right now to me? An elevator pitch? I don't really pitch myself. You shouldn't have to because honestly dates these days I think they're just

giving job they're giving interviews people are going and it's yeah what's your mindset like if we were sitting down having a steak

like would you ooh a steak I think it's fancy I love this you got money we're basically yeah so like we're dating you

well no I would be dating you I'm just tweeting we're not con I would be dating you I'm just tweeting we're not conjoined no no no I'm just trying to like include everyone so say we're on a date

right now the steak comes how are you gonna like flirt with me like what are you gonna say are you gonna be asking like your potential person would you be like

so how's your date been I guess I'd be like oh my god this steak is so thick good good I love thick meat. Wait, do you ever do the baby voice girls do?

Kind of? No, not on dates. But when I date someone for a little bit, sometimes I'll just be like, Ew, I don't feel good today. No one can see your face, but the face is all day. It wasn't the voice, it was the face. Is that how you talk to kids or animals? Men.

No, kids I'm usually like, hi, how are you? I don't baby talk kids because I don't know, they're going to grow up and they've got to talk normal. I don't like children. Kids scare me because they're going to be so brutally honest. They're so rude. They're going to tell you you're not sickening.

Well, you know what? Maybe that's why we need kids around. They're not going to gaslight us into thinking we're everything. That is funny, though. A kid is not going to tell you you're sickening. But they might. They might be like, oh, that's sickening. Right.

Wait, so you're looking. Do you want to be in a relationship? Yeah, you're answering the questions I don't even know. I would, but it has to be the right thing. You know, I'm not just going to be, because my mindset is, also there's this girl, Shira Seven. Have you heard of her? No.

She's like going viral. Oh no, here we go. Here we go. Viral? Okay, you need to get into her. Who's Shira Seven? You need to get her on this podcast. Yeah.

She's blowing up on TikTok right now, because basically it's this woman who is promoting the sugar baby lifestyle, but she's not saying that. Like she'll make titles like how to find a provider man. Sure. It's this way of thinking. And honestly, I'm obsessed with her because I'm kind of using all of her tools in just different areas. So are you looking for a sugar daddy? Well, no. So her mindset has like completely like blown everything out of the water.

She goes. Because a lot of people come for her because she's basically promoting like a woman doesn't work. She's the prize. A man should be providing that lifestyle for her. So it's, you know, it's this whole thing. It's this whole world. And I live for her. She's's, you know, it's this whole thing. It's this whole world. And I live for her. She's hilarious.

Like her comedic timing. People are literally pulling up like, she'll do like YouTube lives for like three hours and all of her bits are going viral. Her thing is,

she's like, well, of course, you know, you can be a successful woman and like make all your money. But the real smart woman, why would you

pay your own, like pay, why, what did she say? She goes, why would you pay your own, like, pay, why, what did she say? She goes, why would you pay your own bills when you gave someone else to pay the bills and you can keep that money? So she was like, it's this whole thing, and honestly, like,

my whole thing, I'm like, ooh, sugaring that daddy. So you're trying to sugar that daddy before he dies. Right. So, like, would you sugar that daddy? Because we always say, you don't want to have a sugar daddy, you want to sugar that daddy. Like, you don't want him to give you the money, you want to get that money. I would sugar that daddy. I truly have no problem with a man paying for stuff for me.

Why not? Like, if you want to take me on a vacation, take me on a vacation. But then it's like, I guess I would spend some of my money on that. Right. I feel like it should be a good... If they want it, I think it should be even.

I agree. But if I'm fucking Bill Gates, I'm not spending any of my money. That's true. Do you know what I mean? Because he looks like that, but also has money money. Right.

You know? Well, I honestly feel like there is a double standard when it comes to sugar daddies or sugar mamas. Because if you think about it, the sugar daddy can get away with being not cute and old and sagging and decrepit. But he has the money so that the young girl is going to be with him. But for some reason, if an older woman has money, she has to be this male. She still has to look beautiful.

There's a standard of beauty that you have to uphold which is wild I want to be an old hag and be a sugar mama just like nasty titties swinging at my knees being like I need you with like

just like your ten pool boys and you're just like I don't know like you just have your choice that's what I want okay I want to know

a little bit about Drag Race so did you guys do your audition tape together or separately? No. Separately. Separately.

Those are like two. So the day we moved to L.A. was like the deadline you had to get your tape in. And we were giving like 30 minute videos each because it was the whole production. And one day those videos have to see the light of day. Wait, you guys made a 30 minute audition video? Each. Well, they were like 25 minutes each. And the deadline had to be 20 minutes. I made a 30-minute audition video? Each. Well, they were like 25 minutes each. And the deadline

had to be 20 minutes. Oh, wasn't it? They're getting what they get. We were walking around the suburbs. We're like, this is our stage. The soccer moms

are our audience. And those producers go, this will be the gimmick this season. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. We want this. No, but we were fully

completely in denial. We thought we were the ones. We were like, this outfit is from the thrift store and I cut it and if you look at the back, you'll probably hate yourself. But it's everything.

I love it. I mean, we were literally... That was the thing. I remember that was actually one of the questions. Or I think when people found out we were on the show, they were like,

oh, are they competing against each other or are they competing as a unit? And for us, we always, you know, we grew up watching America's Next Top Model and we wanted to be like Amanda and Michelle from season seven. They went against each other. And also, that's

kind of the whole reason why we do drag is so people could see us as separate entities. Yes. Exactly. Like salt and pepper. Sometimes you add some salt to your. Because sometimes you add some salt to your food and sometimes

you add some pepper and sometimes you add both. And then Spinderella is in the corner by herself. Yes. Exactly.

Those are our alter egos. So sugar and spice, then we have our alter egos because we grew up on Long Island, the Jersey moms, all that. Yeah, so sugar and spice

are our alter egos but then sugar and spice have their alter egos. Salt and pepper. And we haven't debuted them yet. No, I think we talked about it for one second on the show. You were about to go home, you're like, but we never got to talk about Swartz and Papa. We're like, in the breakdown and untucked, we're crying, I'm like, our family, like,

this whole thing, and then, like, it just cuts to me being like, and we never got to talk, a show, Swartz and Papa. And then we're doing the- Because we have, it's literally one of our quote-unquote canned bits, if you will. But we've never even got... Because we want that... Think about the Long Island medium, Teresa Giudice,

like very... Should we do a little bit for her? I would like to hear it. Okay. I'm Swartz. It's S-A-W outside. And I'm Peppa. That's P-E-P-P-U-H.

And together, we're Swartz and Peppa. Wait, you didn't do the laugh. Oh, sweetie, that was it. Oh. Next time. This is my favorite thing. You just round them up and we go.

I just really enjoyed both of you so much on the show. And I'm so happy that there's no difference. Like, I just... I'm crying right now. I'm, like, difference. I'm like crying. Oh my god. In drag, the breastplate, the bigger hips, the gum, and the long nails. Speak to the manager.

What can I say? I'm here for it. When you do live shows, do you lip sync or do you do like that? Do you do your bits? I think we want to do a little bit of both. Nowadays, the girls you roll to the club, Do you lip sync or do you do like that? Do you do your bits? I think we want to do a little bit of both. Oh, well, this is the issue. So nowadays, the girls you roll to the club, they want to see the drag queen do the death drop, the split.

They get their story. You know, it's that whole thing. It's very like do the trick clown. That's kind of what we lean into now. Like we'll do a fun little like mix because that's kind of what they want. But our first mistake was our first performance in Brooklyn. We were like, let's lean into what we do. Let's be comedy on the mic.

And that was the biggest mistake because the mic didn't work. The light didn't work. No one could hear us. It was a bunch of gays running around screaming that they wanted their dick. And they're like, why aren't you dancing? And I was like, I'm getting you comedy. It was a sweaty nightclub. The girl, someone, then we were doing audience calls.

People were punching. It was, yeah, it was a disaster. You guys started a riot? Yeah. Because you did comedy? Have you ever seen the movie Selena? Yeah. You know when her dad is with the Dinos,

and then they go to that place, the Mexican place, and they don't do Mexican music? They're doing, like, old school, and then they start a riot? This is what I'm envisioning. Just, like, you dressed in drag with, like, gays being like, we don't want this! Yeah. what I'm envisioning.

Just like you dressed in drag with like gays being like, we don't want this! It was sweatier than like a whore in church. I was like trying to like, I was in my meaty tuck era so the girls were doing zoom-ins. I was just a mess.

No, literally the other day we just filmed, yeah, this film, maybe this will be, I don't know, we did something with Bianca Del Rio and we were explaining to her the whole thing

about Sugar's Cookie always being out in our videos, about how we always let that happen because of his engagement. So they were like, why is her tuck so low? And we'd always laugh, we're like, oh, Sugar's Cookie is out, she has to get it together, but we're like, oh, no. It's a branding. It's engagement. It's smart. We're getting comments. It's very

smart. I think you two are smarter than what people think. Let's a branding it's engagement it's smart it's very smart I think you two are smarter than what people think let's hope let's hope let's hope okay so what episode was it

where you two were separated it was like episode snatch game three or four it was a very early snatch game

which I was like wild I wonder why they did that. I wonder. We'll never know. But was it like hard to like leave each other? Like, I know it seemed like on the show, like you were crying and you were sad.

But like, were you in your hotel room being like, I don't know what to do now? Well, the whole thing. Oh my God, the drama with this. But, like, so I remember when we got back from filming, there was rumors that were circulating that apparently Spice shut down the set and had a breakdown after Sugar left for three days. I was like, girl, I wish, like, work. But, like, you actually kind of, no, you did have a breakdown. I will say there's no smoke without fire because I definitely did have a breakdown after the cameras were cut. I was in the bathroom. I took off my

makeup. It was this whole thing. I remember being... The reason why there was a three-day break is because it was Memorial Day weekend. There was a three-day break. You didn't shut it down. The government holiday shut it down. Exactly. I needed that break because I needed to get myself

back together. Watching it back a year later, I'm like, girl, this is so dramatic. But in that moment, I'm like, oh shit, I'm going to have to go the rest of this without seeing Sugar. And at that point, we hadn't, I mean, we had seen each other days or weeks without seeing each other. No, we had gone long times without seeing each other. I think in that specific environment, it's different. It's a hard environment. I don't think people realize how tough it is. Yeah, because you don't have any access to that.

You're just, like, alone. For me, it was hard because, you know, it's TV. You get what you sign up for. So I'm very, like, the professional in that sense. I'm like, okay, like, you go onto the show, basically, and you don't know what your assigned role is. If you're smart enough, you realize it as you're going. Yeah, that's what we were saying during reality TV. It's kind of like

you all get cast for this movie, but you don't realize your part until that movie comes out. But if you're smart enough, you realize as you're filming the movie. You are absolutely right, because it's like the edit makes you however you are. It's like, yeah, you said what you said, but it's like, did you say it in that context that they

put it in? Exactly. Right. That's kind of the fun game of it all, and that's why I'm happy we did it. We're such reality TV fans. I mean, we're more along the lines of the Housewives. I like watching unhinged people throwing stuff and flipping things and that whole experience.

I will say, just finishing the question about was it hard or not, I think... You were crawling out of your room the night of... Yeah, it was this whole thing. I remember I was like, because I wanted to say bye to Sugar one more time. And I was like,

let me just go to her hotel. And then so at one point I was literally like crying. I walked out of my room, which like you're not allowed to do. I was just walking by myself. I was like, this whimpering dog,

where's Sugar's room? I should have just knocked on all the doors. I don't even know. You should have just knocked on my door. But then one of the helpers came and saw me and walked me back to

the room and talked me off my ledge. And it was so dramatic. I was writing notes. I'm like, okay, girl, there's so many channels next because I was going to sell everything. I'm leaving everything. I'm like, do this. I was reading all these things. Meanwhile, production's probably reading them and going, okay, you can have that.

No, you can't have this one. How funny. I love it. Okay, real quick, we. No, you can't have this one. How funny. I love it. Okay, real quick, we're going to take a break. And we're back. Okay, so since Drag Race, have people, so you're, you can't, well, I guess you can answer this, Spice. But have people been sliding into your DMs being like, fuck me?

People go, um. It's weird because I feel like we have scared. We've scared all the people that were trying to fuck us away, I feel like. Through the drag. Through the drag. Which is nice. So now I kind of just have 13-year-old girls from TikTok being like, what highlighter was that? And like for me, that feels like the safe space.

Okay. Well, I will say definitely, I mean, our TikTok audience is definitely, I think it was like 85% women. So we, the teen girls and the lesbians

live for Miss Sugar and Spice. So I'm living for them right back. But I mean, I feel like even if you were the most medium ugly person with two followers that no one knows, I'm sure there's someone up in those DMs trying to fuck it, so.

You know, yeah. I mean, no. Well, maybe not. Nobody's really in my DMs being like, let's fuck. Same. Like, mine are just like, I like you. That's actually better. Because you're not providing that air. In my eyes, when you say that, that just means people respect you more. Because think about it.

It's like, oh, this person is of value. They're not going to respond to me with a response like that. They're the most respectable person in the world. There's still going to be someone saying, like, step on me. And sugar, I don't want to be respected. I want my back blown out. But you know what's even more sickening? When like,

they do respect you and it does happen, you're like, work. Okay, whatever. Maybe I'm like, it's like, it's high value time with sugar

and it's like, this is how you're going to be a high value owner. Sugar the bimbo whore. It's like, but we want to be respected. Well, no, that's why I feel like

I live for an online moment, but we want to be respected. Well, no, that's why I feel like I live for an online moment, but there's nothing better than an in-person meeting encounter because there's so much more. I mean, like, I'm a drag queen. I live for the fantasy. Yes. I agree. I mean, even for me, obviously, I'm in a relationship,

but also, like, I love a good, like, eye candy, flirtatious moment. It's fun. Do the two of you live together? Yes. And then do you ever feel like the third wheel when Spice's boyfriend is over? Oh yeah, for sure. But it's nice because I feel like we have a good dynamic

where you just know each other so well. So I'm like, okay, that's them doing their thing. And I think a lot of people, because through our work Sugar and Spice we're always together they think we're we are conjoined

that is one of the things but we really lead our own separate lives after the show like if I'm out or if I ever make an appearance that's the thing

about going to like gay spaces or gay clubs like we were in Australia and I was like oh my god this is literally asking for

this is like Snow White getting dressed up as Snow White walking into Disneyland and being like, yes, being shocked that people are taking. You know, so when we were in Australia, that was happening. And we were laughing. I was like, people kept on coming up to me. And the first thing they were, oh, my God, where's sugar? And I'm like, so then I started getting crazy.

I'm like, I'm not going to tell you where she is. I'm like, oh, she's over there by the bathroom. Meanwhile, she's like somewhere. And I was like, I was having fun. I'm like, oh, she's by the bathroom you mile she's like somewhere and I was like I was having fun I'm like oh she's down I was just making shit up that's so funny

that people think you're constantly together yeah but it makes sense though you know you're gonna see Spongebob and Patrick and you're gonna be like where's Patrick

well wait can you explain what you told Nicole earlier we got here and I was like Nicole oh my god I feel like

actually I'm meeting Spongebob right now because I know I heard your voice and I'm like wait know this voice, but I've never seen it in real life. But now the face is matching. So it's kind of like if you were to meet the creator of Spongebob, you hear the voice and you're like, what? Well, except you are Spongebob. But you're not Spongebob. But if you were the creator of Spongebob, if I turned around and heard the voice, you would be Spongebob, but you're not Spongebob.

Commercial break. No, I liked it. I think it's fun. Are you two, no, you're not Virgos, you're Leos. I thought you were going to say, are you versatile? Yeah, are you, okay, I'm looking at my notes. One is verse and one is a top. No, we said, wait, no, no, no, we said F, a top or bottom.

We need to know if you're a porch or a bike person. That's what we need to know. The more important question. Thank you. A porch or a bike person. That's what we need to know. The more important question. Thank you. A porch or a bike person? That's what we said the first day on Drag Race. We were like, are you a porch or a bike person? And they were like, these bitches are crazy. Wait, that's such a good question because I feel like porch means you want to stay inside and

just hang out and a bike person means you're out for adventure. You're the first person that gets it. Wait, really? People think we're, they're like, you get it. It's very, It's very intuitive. Rich, did you get it? No, I was like, Porsche? In the morning, what do you do?

Do you go outside? You sit on the porch? You observe the leaves blowing? Maybe the annoying neighbor that's driving by? Or do you want to get on your bike? And go somewhere. I'm a bike person on vacation. A porch person when I don't have to work. Because I like to just like sit and like take a minute.

You would be a fun person on vacation. Oh, I'm great on vacation. I will do anything on a vacation except for zip lining. Because I watched a fat man do it and he didn't make it all the way across. Because I was like, is there a weight limit? And the guy was like no i don't know and i was like i don't know you don't seem certain about that and i'm not gonna take my fat ass on something in a different country and not make it all the way across well maybe that's a show then

yeah did he live to survive he did did he live to tell they did but then we all laughed at him and then they had to go get him because he made it just far enough that he couldn't hop down and make it all the way. And there was water. So people got in the water and they were dragging his legs. And I was like, no, ma'am. No. I can't be doing this. No.

But, I mean, that's one of the reasons why I love you so much. Because I always say I gravitate towards the hot unserious and silly girlies and I think that's you you're very hot you're very unserious thank you and like you're silly

and like you're like fun and like girly pop being silly is the biggest compliment now like in my silly girl era like it's very bad I love being silly you're the queen of silly actually thank you

that's your brand new moment I'm the queen of silly I just love Thank you. That's your brand new moment. I'm the queen of silly. I just love to tee hee hee. Honestly, like, truly, I think a lot of people are very serious and, like, take themselves too seriously. And I'm like, it's a treat to, like, do a dumb thing and then laugh at it. Like, I think I talked about it on this podcast when it happened, but I was late for work because there was a bunch of children and adults crossing the street. And I was like, oh my God, why is there a children's parade right now?

And I got to work and I repeated it several times until finally my makeup artist was like, do you mean school? They were going to school. And I was like, so it wasn't a parade? She was like, no. And then I laughed about it. And I wasn't like, oh my God,

I'm so dumb that I didn't know it was. I don't know. I just like to giggle. Well, I love that you could have a sense of humor with yourself about that because it's like, I feel like people are so quick to be so hard on themselves and judge themselves but if you could literally laugh at yourself then it's like, oh wait,

it didn't even matter. Okay, I'm not even letting it affect me. It's a nicer way to live. Do you know what I mean? Okay, when did you guys start doing drag? Ooh. It's interesting for us because I look back and I'm like, oh, thanks. The answer is 2019. That's two hours later.

I look back. We hopped out of the womb. 2019. We hopped out of the womb. And I like to say, we had the limp wrist. There's all the photos of us. Maybe you did this as a kid, too. I just blew her cover.

I said, we're getting to the point. Let me live my fantasy. You take the long story short. That story's all the photos of us, like, with, um... Maybe you did this as a kid, too. I just blew her cover. I'm not breaking that to the point. Let me live my fantasy. You take the long story short. That story's not gonna be short, baby. I'm like, let me keep it short and sweet, and it's, like,

three days later, and it's like, oh, bitches, look, go on. I like to... Were you the girl that would take the... Put a towel on my...

Yes. Or a blanket, and you were giving inches? Yes. So that was us. But it didn't start until it was, like, the end of elementary school.

Obsessed with America's Next Top Model. We were taking photos of all of our dolls, got a camera, and we were pretending. We would call them like Bratz Next Top Models.

So we'd take the photos of the dolls. Then we were watching all the YouTube videos on how to do makeup. We thought we weren't allowed to do it on ourselves. We're like,

we'll just put it on our dolls. So we learned like Photoshop in like fifth grade. We were editing all of our dolls' makeup, going to doll photography. And then it wasn't until like makeup, going to doll photography. And then it wasn't until we were going through high school,

I'm like, oh, I guess we're not allowed to do this anymore. But, you know, it's our art. We're taking photos of them. I'm not playing with dolls. Did you ever have things like that growing up where there was something in your head where you're like, oh, I'm not allowed to do that? Yeah, Barbies. I played with Barbies way longer than most people.

Really? And I remember taking them out of the closet and being like, I guess I'm too old for this. Isn't that so sad? It is sad. And now, as an adult, I have a ton of dolls in my office and stuff I'm too old for this isn't that so sad it is sad and now as an adult I have a ton of dolls in my office and stuff

because I was like I don't know I want all the things that I liked growing up and now I buy whatever the fuck I want I have so many pairs of Skechers I love that

so I love that you said that because even for that's the thing with dolls especially even with like older like cause say if you're if you're anything but a kid people are gonna kinda judge like cause say if you're

if you're anything but a kid people are gonna kinda judge you so even if you're they say dolls are for like girls so even if you are a girl or an adult woman that has dolls you can still be shamed for it

you can still be shamed oh that's for kids so then especially when you're like a gay boy that likes that then it's even more like taboo but it's maybe not even people in your actual vicinity saying you can't have that

it's just you think it's ingrained in your head it's always you yeah cause like how actual vicinity saying you can't have that it's you in your head it's like how you're raised and shit and like socialized and whatever I remember the last Barbie I bought it was like really sad we went to I think it was called KB Toys these are the things I need to know

KB Toys yes KB Toys was sickening you know how they have the big boxes but then they have the slender boxes where she didn't come with as many accessories? So I got a slender box Barbie. She was black. Maybe it was Teresa. I don't remember if it was black Barbie or Teresa.

But I remember she had like a hot pink outfit and like crimpy hair. And then my mom was like, this is going to be one of the last dolls you get because, you know, you're getting a little older. And I was like, one of the last dolls I get. And then I like cherished her. Like I used to cut their hair and shit. But like this last one, I was like, pristine. You'll be beautiful. I wish I had all my Barbies.

Wow. Am I going to cry? No wonder why you're so girly, pop, and diva-licious. Because you liked dolls growing up. Loved. That makes sense. Loved. My Barbies had a white

Ferrari. They had a pink Jeep. Ooh, they had the cars. They were zooming. They really did. They were zooming everywhere and I used to make them fuck. And my sister would always be like, maybe we don't do that today. And I'm like, why not? But you know what? Things are tracking. You like

the dolls. That makes sense why you're so glam and fun. And then also you were making the dolls. That makes sense why you're so glam and fun. And then also you were making them fuck. That makes sense why you're living your best horny life. Just the horniest. Very competitive. I'm horny. Have you guys toured yet at all? Yes.

We did a little mini tour in Australia and London. So that was cute. That's fun. But we're getting excited for our tour at the end of the year. That we're doing. Yeah. This should be out by then. Yes. London, so that was cute. We're getting excited for our tour at the end of the year. This should be out by then. It's called Drag Boot Camp with Miss Mistress and Malaysia. They're taking the life-size dolls to Drag Boot Camp,

so buckle up, girls. I love it, because they're your drag moms? Yes, they are. Actually? Yes. We say drag mom, but we're really just this family of friends. The gag, though, is that we call Mistress our drag mom, but she's literally five days older than us. And that's why, even with her, we always got along with her. Even from that first day, we were living, the cameras went down.

I love Mistress. I'm obsessed. I got very drunk at a... I know this! Oh, I need to hear your side of things. Yeah, I told you. Wait, wait, you have to. I need to hear your side of things.

I need everything about this. It, I need to hear your side of things. They told us this. Wait, wait. I need to hear your side of things. I need everything about this. It was Hart and WeHo. And I can't. Oh, it was Bosco's face reveal party. Right. And we were all the way in the back because I didn't want to pay for VIP. And I didn't think to text Cornbread to be like, can I have tickets? Yeah, girl, they would have had you on.

Well, it just didn't occur to me. I'm obsessed. So we're just in the back. I got shit faced. As you should. And then Sasha came in. And then I was like, I got to meet Sasha. So I followed her. I got shit-faced. And then Sasha, like, came in, and then I was like, I gotta meet Sasha. So I, like, followed her. I'm obsessed with you.

You're so cute. Followed her into a corner and was like, Sasha. I was like, sorry to bother you. And then she was like, she took a deep breath. And it's one of those things where you're like, you probably go through this now, where you're like, okay, let me put on a face and meet this dumb fan. Not dumb fan. Fans are very nice. But sometimes you're not in let me put on a face and meet this dumb fan not dumb fan fans are very nice but sometimes you're not in the mood right but i felt the and then she turned around

with a big smile and she went oh nicole and i was like it's me and then she's like me let me bring you up to meet the girls and then mistress was there so i talked to mistress and then mistress came down later and i was even drunker and i was like listen if you make it to the finale i will pay for all of your outfits no matter how much they are i will pay for every penny she paid 40 i do not remember this my friend the next day was like so how much money do you think mistress's outfits are gonna cost and i was like what do you mean my friend i was like you promised her you would pay every single penny but she didn't reach out so I didn't pay for any of her

She said that the check is too big for Nicole Oh you dodged that bullet 40k Isn't that wild? She spent $40,000 Allegedly

She said it herself Wow I'm glad she didn't reach out That's a whole lot of money You're like actually you're maybe just a wig Yeah Here's a whole lot of money. You're like, actually, you're maybe just a wig.

Yeah, here's a wig and a wish and a prayer. Oh my God, you guys looked fabulous at the finale PS. Oh, thank you. Just like so good.

I also loved that, I don't think either one of you were lip syncing. No. Oh no, that was the irony. Spice was. Well,

I knew the one word. They got the one, they try to make sugar look even worse. Well, not worse, that was our purpose, babe.

of course, but for me, I knew the one line, I was looking at the monitor, I. Well, not worse. That was our purpose, babe. Well, of course. But for me, I knew the one line. I was looking at the monitor. I was like, do you want to do well? That was my favorite part because there was a teleprompter. There were three teleprompters. And you decided to not do it. And you know what?

You have to explain the story behind that. No one knows. The story behind that. Me, because you know, you go home. You're on the show. You're living your best. Sugar was cooking. She was like, I'm about to show these girls up.

No, I have to. No, no, no, no, no, no. It's an energy thing. So basically, like, you have a lot of time to think and ponder on your experience. And me, I was like, what is my look going to be? And I go on my hot girl walks and I get to take an edible and I walk around the hills. You'll be out to take him on a hot girl walk with us one day. Oh, we need to do a hot girl walk with you. I'll do a hot girl walk.

Yes, yes. Like, what kind of hills are we talking? Just... Because I do slight inclines it's really not that bad it's just like through those fleas I don't know how to pronounce it but we go through you take the edible

you listen to your music you escape you get creative I love it because I'm able to get out of the front part of my head where I normally am because I'm very analytical especially between us two so it's like you're living. You can like have self-love, appreciate yourself. So me, I was like fantasizing about like,

what is my finale look going to be? So I was like, oh, Swan Princess, this whole thing. But then I was like, I can't go back there. And like, you're not getting one inch of camp from me tonight. I walked in. I was a clown the whole time. I was like, this is like my divine feminine like moment. Like I was really like tapped into this.

I was like, they're not getting one. Smiled nothing out of me. So then when we got up there, and I kind of forgot about what my mindset was, and I'm like, okay, I got to give camp. I got to do my snaps and claps. But then when we were filming, the cameras went up. I was like, no, this just feels out of line.

I can't do it. So then I gave nothing. But I will say that is what, that's something that's so iconic about you, is that that's everything, though.. That's something that's so iconic about you is that like, that's everything though. That like, technically you weren't supposed to be highlighted in this for now.

You're just an, also I didn't think the cameras were on me. So it's like, that's everything. Now in the world of TV, you weren't even supposed to have a moment, but people couldn't even help but notice you and give you a moment.

So I think that was cool. Work. Yeah, I don't know. I thought you two were like iconic on this show. Oh, thank you. How,

okay, so Snatch Game, tell me a little bit about Snatch Game. Did you, was it hard? I don't know. I thought you two were iconic on this show. Oh, thank you. Okay, so Snatch Game, tell me a little bit about Snatch Game. Did you, was it hard? I don't know. I thought both of you did a good job. That's the funny thing, is that even when we were watching at the reunion, they showed the clips back, and I'm sure that was Rue's first time seeing it, but when

they were showing the clips and it was me doing hoo-hoo, he was, and I remember that, like, he thought it was so funny. I thought it was funny. And that's the whole thing. And that's why I was so nervous about Miley seeing, and we found out that Miley actually saw it. This is the story.

Because I'm, Miley's like one of her biggest fans. And I always say when you're a fan of someone, you could kind of poke more fun at them than, it's kind of like with your siblings or friends it's like they're a bitch but they're my bitch

and you're not allowed to say that you know so it was very that and I knew that we gave them the material to like edit it crazy and all that

but I'm happy that the girls but also like even with the iconic crazy moments from Drag Race I still talk about Laganja's stand up

years from now and I don't even remember any of the other girls and she went home. So I was like, job well done, I guess. Yeah, I don't know. I thought it was fun

and funny. And also, I've seen the Snatch Game uninterrupted. Yes. So it is very easy to edit things how you want them to be.

Right. It's really wild to watch it uninterrupted. Yeah, yeah. And it's long. I'm sure people have asked you this, but have you ever thought about who you would do if you were to do something like that?

Yeah, I would do Emma Stone. Oh my god. Or Monique. Okay. I think those are my two. I think Malaysia was saying that she was thinking about doing you or something. She did me, I think, for her audition tape. Okay, work.

And then maybe was going to do me for Snatch Game. I don't know. I would love to see somebody do me. I feel like you're great to do because you also have a distinct voice. And I think if you do a voice, that's already better than someone not giving it. Like, I think to do a voice,

you're already in a better space. Also, Snatch Game seems hard, but you can pre-write jokes. That was the irony of me going home on that for Trisha. You were so excited for that. That was the most fun I had on set all day. But the irony is, I remember,

and this was the whole joke, y'all didn't even see what actually happened and the reason why I thought I was going to be in the bottom over her. But we'll leave that to the TV world. Sure. But I remember we got off set.

We were telling Bianca this the other day. If y'all think we're delusional and crazy, this is how much we actually are delusional. We got off. But honestly, no, it wasn't delusional. They would think it's delusional because they didn't see what happened but basically

I was like well Spice how do you think I did people hearing this of course they're going to think we're delusional because what we were

like talking about was something that was never even shown but like with us I was like sugar I was like you ate

I was like oh my god you were giving Bianca Del Rio you were because we always had this thing in our early drag career

we were like oh my god but was it giving Bianca and we were telling Bianca and she like she

gets it she gets it because I meant when I say giving Bianca I always mean like like perfection she like takes control yeah

professionalism she'll kind of like but kind of antagonize in a way so that was kind of what I was giving with Trisha she was being the internet troll that was getting up and doing the crazy things oh yeah right so I was giving with Trisha she was being the internet troll that was getting up

and doing the crazy things so I was like oh my god it was giving me you and Lucy I was like the whole time I was like

oh shit I have to go crazier because Sugar and Lucy are stealing the show right now but also for us people to understand I looked at Snatch Game

I'm like this is just a YouTube video that has a chance to go viral so let me do the craziest shit to go viral if that makes sense. That's how

my mind thinks. That was the irony. I was like, I was giving Bianca and then we got there and you're going home and I was like, I love that pipeline so much. Yeah, it was a pipeline. I was like, girl, you were giving Bianca. You were out there. It was the whole thing. So I love.

Oh, wow. I like hearing about this show. And I also liked your prance. Yes. That Michelle didn't like it. Yeah, but you know what? I always say that sometimes, well, actually, I don't know what they say. I don't know where I'm going with this, actually.

You know what they say? I'm having a high thought right now. I don't know. Even though I'm not high. Like, do you ever, like, get really up in the clouds and you're trying to tell a story? I have ADHD, so a lot of times I'll be in the middle of a story and be like, I'm so sorry. That's why I relate to you. But I always say, I'm like, oh, wait.

Like, even with our friends, I'm like, we're like, no, it poofed. It poofed away. We're not going to try to find the story because you're going to look crazier being high and then trying to get back to where you were and it didn't make sense. I'd rather it's big. Wait, I don't even know what I'm talking about. Yeah. Just like, I don't know. Sorry about it.

Oh, no. The trot. The whole trot of it all. Actually, we're working on a song this summer. We're going to do a little song called Trot. Okay. So we're just going to trot to the top, trot till we drop, you know? And also we always say like trotting, it's kind of a lifestyle.

Like if you don't trot, you're not hot, you know? Sometimes I walk around my house just, I mean, this is, like, before I saw you on drag. Like, I just. Librest. Yes. Just let him hang. And then I'll just be like, oh, I need that, and I need this. Our friends were like, I've been trotting.

Just flopping. Just flopped. And then sometimes I'll be like, what if I trot a little bit? And then I'll trot my house, and then I'll just laugh. I'm always having a nice time. But what's so fun, one last thing about the trot is that a lot of people don't realize is that I was, like when I trotted away from Rue Michelle,

like, baby, that was in my, I was going to do that at one point, but I was planning to do that regardless because I was like, ooh, what's something silly I can do and just be like stupid that no one had, like, oh, I'll trot back to the stage.

But up until that point, I never had the moment where they were like, you're safe by yourself to do so. So that was always in my arsenal, ready to go. But then when they gave me the material, Michelle was like,

I don't like it. I was like, ooh, well, you're going to be seeing it. But also, that's why I think, like, we love reality TV so much.

And I think that's, like, people, the girls that get it, get it. But with us, we really have such a producer mindset because people watch reality TV.

And you self-produce your TikToks. Exactly. I think people don't think about that. Exactly. Because you don't blow up overnight for no reason. It's pretty calculated. Literally.

Sometimes, so it's the producer mindset that's in me, but also sometimes I just be getting bored. So sometimes I'm like, okay, well, what can I do with this?

You're so out of control on a show like that. The little things that you are in control of, I'm like, okay, well, what can I do with this? You're so out of control on a show like that. I'm like, the little things that you are in control of, I'm like, okay, well, let's see what I can kind of throw a little nuke in there and see what happens. So I had fun with that. I mean, it definitely worked out in your advantage because with TV, I mean, you look at our season, it was edited down so much. You actually had to give them so much material because chances are only one thing will even be used. You were doing... I remember the one day you had your dog, the two days I was there,

you started barking. And we got that. You know when they have you walk in and you're talking about who went home? I had my dog and I got bored once again. So I know I started going... And then I was like, oh my God, my dog.

And then they're like, but I just started acting with the dog and it was getting up and I was just having a bark. But yeah. And then they didn't use that? No. No. I would like to see unseen footage from you two.

I feel like it's unhinged in a very fun way. Just a real fun time. That's why I need. You know what? I need a camera on us three. Us and you. We'll have to put you in drag and us just like go in places yeah put me in drag

I would love to do that that would be everything cause wait I know you've done it before who Mo Hart what's her drag history

Mo Hart has put me in drag I think twice yeah once with Trixie and once just her and that's the only real time I've been in like drag drag

right sometimes my makeup artist Jen will do like a draggy look or whatever and then sometimes I'll put on a huge lash for no reason

just cause you know just having a little bit of fun but that's why I love people like you that are just down to have fun and experiment

cause there are some people that are actually against makeup cause they're like they're so like for the male gaze or whatever they're not gonna like that

they want me natural that's why I love people that look at makeup as art and just funsies and something that you could just wipe off yeah also I'm not putting on makeup

for a man or for anybody I put on makeup to look in the mirror and go I look like a doll yeah okay well then you're in the right place

here's my question for you what's your experience with dating meeting other men where like what's the response you get if you're more glammed or if you're more natural like what have you experienced men tend to like less right and i like more um so like i've been on dates with dudes where the first date i'm like

to the nines like i've really done it i'm lashes. Like, I blow you away when I blink. And then the next time, I'm wearing, like, a little bit less. And they're like, oh, you look so beautiful. And I'm like, oh, I didn't get the beautiful last time. I guess you're, like, a little less. And then the next date, I'll put on even more. Okay, work. Okay, you know what's fascinating? The idea of mirroring people.

So dating kind of gets fun. Me, just, like, being this little, like, philosopher. Sugar the philosopher. If you match their energy, it's really fascinating just to see their response. So you can kind of get the idea. If they're going on a date with you, All these damn games.

These games. It is games. You know what? It's almost just like the game's being played anyway, so you kind of just have to enter. That is true. That's just life. You kind of have to play,

otherwise it's going to play you, I guess. I think that's right. Real quick, we've got to take another break. Ooh. Beep boop, we're back. Okay, so we were talking about games and playing them. I've liked gentlemen,

gone on dates with them been like I don't know about your vibe and then tried to like match their vibe to be like I don't know about your vibe you sounded like Marge Simpson I don't know about their vibe

Homer Homer I'll never be able to do it again you get good Marge ooh I would love a cunty Marge Simpson dragified look for you

on Halloween ooh I kinda like that with a huge wig. Also, get back to your story, but this thought's going to leave my head

if I don't say it. I think that's another reason why I like you so much is because you're, I'm really into voices and voice inflections. And like, obviously,

someone told her Cadence once and she's obsessed with that word. No, even like, I used to watch like, Big Brother and it would be, previously on Celebrity,

Big Brother, Tiffany, she's Previously on Celebrity, Big Brother. Tiffany, she's in the diary room talking about Gemma. So I would hear that and I would mimic it and I was only good if I heard it. But I'm so good to her story. You're doing these voices and I'm inspired right now. Oh, thank you. I didn't realize I had a weird way of speaking until someone pointed it out. I didn't really, like I guess I have like a sing-songy way of speaking.

You have a good voice. Like, that's why you're good for a pot. Thank you. Yeah, your tone. Thank you. Oh my God, my tone. Are you a singer?

No, she's tone deaf. I can't. I'm tone deaf. But you know what? With some autotune and something, a pussy-popping beat, that'd be sickening.

I could see, yeah. Even you just being like, I don't wear wigs. And then there's a beat. Like something, something's going on. I don't wear wigs. I don't wear wigs. And then there's a beat. Like something. I don't wear wigs. I don't wear wigs. You know, just something.

Who me? No wigs. That would just be a straight up lie. I'm wearing a wig right now. I love a wig. Always a wig. Wait, what did I even interrupt you from? Listen, that's gone. It's gone.

It poofed. It's okay. Do you guys have any advice for single people looking for somebody? Maybe I'll start with Spice since you found somebody. What's your advice? Don't give us the generic. Love yourself. Honestly, I would say

just go out there and just be yourself. Don't try to conform for someone. Do you know what I mean? Yes. I think maybe in the back of your mind, like we were just talking about the makeup thing. I think you're already on the right step because you're not trying to be like, oh, like you did the opposite. He liked that you were wearing less makeup and you did more. So I like that.

You can kind of weed people out by just kind of. Because if you're trying to be someone that someone likes, eventually they're going to see the real you and it's not going to work out. So I say you lay it all out there. Be the most 100% version of yourself. Say if you're the girl that loves wearing big hoops and you're afraid, wear those big hoops. Wear hoops on your damn wrists. Do you know what I mean?

Just embrace whoever you are crazily. But even for me, I remember before I was in a relationship, sometimes I would be like, ooh, do I dress how I want to dress or should I dress how I think that would be more pleasing? Or like more palatable. But honestly, looking back, you always get more success when you dress up actually do I dress how I want to dress or should I dress how I think that would be more pleasing? Or like more palatable.

But honestly, looking back, you always get more success when you dress up actually as you. That's so interesting. I've never thought of – well, no, that's a lie. I very recently read that men like red, so I bought a bunch of red things. Well, red's my favorite color. But the red things I bought were like a red sweater with dogs on it. And I was like, I got it. And I was like, ooh, wait. And then I was like, wait, what am I doing?

It's a grandma sweater. Men aren't going to like this. So I cannot dress to the way a man wants me to look. I just, it's not inherent in me. And I just like can't do it. Wait, is this your first relationship? It's my first and only relationship. So yeah, I've never been in a relationship prior.

And it's been two years and it's going well yeah it's going well I mean I feel like two years in the gay world that's like ten years I think that's ten years anywhere because I like maybe you're right yeah that's a long fucking time yeah okay sugar do you have any advice

me being the single one for me what I've learned also wait just one last thing of advice I will say. Just make it more fun. If you almost look at your life as a movie or this bad rom-com... Girl, that's what I was going to say. Twin telepathy. Well, no, I was literally going to talk about you.

Everyone's in their eras nowadays. Wait, isn't telepathy moving things with your mind? That's Matilda, right? Matilda? Have you seen that movie? Oh, yes. Matilda does have it. Wait, is that what telepathy is? For some reason, when people say twin telepathy, I just think of it as like we're reading

each other. Like we have the same thought. Rich, can you look up telepathy? I'm on it. Yep. The supposed communication of thoughts or ideas by means other than senses. Then what's moving things with your mind? Telekinesis. Oh, telekinesis.

We're learning words today. This is big for me. Okay, so yeah, you had twin telepathy just happen. Yeah. No, you have to think of yourself like you're in a movie. And you're the main role and you're casting who's going to be your scene partner. And that has helped me because a lot of times I could go on dates and the whole time I'm thinking, Oh my God, do they like me?

Oh, like, am I, like, funny enough? Like, you just start to think all these things. You've got to ask yourself, do I like them? Not do they like me? And basically, you put the power back. That's super important, yes. Because half the time I'd be either on a date with someone or meeting someone, having a fun little rendezvous. And I'm trying to like like show

how desirable i am but one that's just going to be a turnoff to them because it's like they feel the desperation coming off of you subconsciously even if you don't realize you're doing it so that's why you always have to get your mind right and do any you know try to really work on that before you enter that space i mean that's another thing where you don't want to really work on that before you enter that space. I mean, that's another thing where... I mean, you don't want to be giving Pick Me energy. I wrote a little song the other day. I was like, Pick Me energy. You should date a bitch that's hot like me.

And I was like, I want the song to just be like all the reasons why you should lean into being the Pick Me chick. Well, my thing is, people become aligned. And you always get exactly who you are. So if you're feeling weird about yourself, you have these insecurities, maybe you don't like where your job is, you're going to end up with someone that's at that point of their journey too. You're always a match to who you're bringing in. So, Nicole, that's actually good for you if you haven't been in a relationship recently or whatever it is. Because these people just probably if i'm gonna do

a little if i'm gonna tap in tap in i feel like these people just aren't at your level of where you are in your life mentally emotionally so that's why i feel like you're probably feeling a disconnect because either one these people are approaching you in a way that isn't showing isn't showing you that they realize your value. Or two, you guys are just unaligned. Like they just energy wise. So that's actually a good thing. Is this completely off or is this?

No, I think it's pretty spot on. I don't know. No, it's good because. I feel like you guys are like wizards and like, you're giving me like wizardly advice. I like it. Because, well, think about it this way I'd much rather be single

than be with a dusty like why just be in a relationship to be in a relationship I would rather look at someone and be like oh she's single and everything and she knows her worth compared to someone that's settling for Miss Flop you know

and for a lot of years I'm like I'll I'll settle for anything, like, as a joke. But, like, maybe I should just stop joking about settling and just, like, being desperate and taking anything. Although I do really want a huge dick in me soon. So you know what? I think it's okay to, like, manifest it but not be thirsty for it. Just claim it. Yeah, like you claim it, and it's here. It's like rendering, ooh, not me burping.

I mean, we always say that. You seem surprised about it. Not the burp. Like genuinely scared. Imagine you get your next script, and it's like burps, but surprisingly burps. Surprises themselves with a burp oh for me

surprises themselves with a burp wait okay we do have to wrap it up but I do want to know what's the worst date either of you have been on

oh god there was so I had back in my day but there was a moment in time when I had Grindr.

And I was like, okay, you know what you're signing up for? Just like doing Drag Race. You know, you're going to blame it on the edit. If you're going on Grindr, you're probably going to meet the most cavely man in a corner. So I just remember walking in and I was like, I need to abort immediately because the breath was on 10. You had to flee the scene. Oh, no. And I don't care how cute you are.

And I get it. You're out with your girls. Maybe you're having beer breath, whatever, at the end of the night. But if we're going into the meeting. What do you think about your breath? I mean, I don't think I've ever clocked it. I haven't really dated a lot of people who drink beer. Okay.

I drink a lot. I'm a cocktail girl. Right. And I date a lot of people who also like a cocktail. Gay and fruity. Yeah. Hangover's bad the next day, yes. Yes. But basically, I just walked in and I was like, oh, the bread. And for me, it was just an immediately, I couldn't get over it. It was just

a hurdle I couldn't jump. So immediately, I'm like, how? The actress had to come out. All of a sudden, I'm like, oh, baby girl, let me go to the bathroom. And I go to the bathroom, like, what am I going to do? You didn't at least do the fake call? Well, no, and then I walk out, and then all of a sudden I was actress. Jenny, she's in the hospital. Okay, I'll be right there.

I was like, how am I going to get out? And also my shoes were by the door I had across, and I was just going to bolt it. But then I was just like, you know, I think, I don't know, I think I, like, my stomach, it's just like turning. Wait, he had beer breath, like, in his own home? Yeah. Or maybe it wasn't beer, it was something. It was just something, Something died in there.

It was either a bad box of a soup or whatever. So then basically I'm asking him, like my stomach. He's like, oh no baby, we'll sit down. I have the little Pepto-Bismol. I'm like, that's going to kick in in 30 and I think I'm bad about a little child. He was like, what? I'm like, I'm going out. I'm itching to the door. He's like, let me order the car. I'm like, no, the Uber's here. And I just like ran out.

I'm like, that was the worst acting scene I've ever done, but it worked. But it worked. You got out. Okay. For me, nothing can really compete with that. Mine was just, I think it was the only other actual date I went, even with my boyfriend, we never actually went on a date because like, it was during

COVID. So we were just like, I was going over his place and we were hanging out. We weren't like going out places. But I remember, I think it was the first day I ever went on when I was in New York City, still in college. And it was with this random guy. And it wasn't exciting

and crazily bad. It was just boringly bad. It was just like, there was nothing. That was a lovely story. There was just nothing to talk. But you know when the conversation is just so dry?

Yeah, when it's dry and it's like, okay, so what else? And for me, I'm fine. Because I guess I could be, even though so what else? For me, I'm fine. Because I guess I could be, even though I have my introverted ways, I guess on a date I would probably be more outgoing. Wait, you think you're introverted?

Well, no, I'm not. But I have my ways where I don't feel like. You know, everyone has their moments. But on a date like that, I was in my outgoing phase. So we're on. And I'm fine if someone's more shy. But for me, if I have to do all the work and it's giving improv

and I'm kind of I always say like that's why even going on dates it's kind of like improv it is because you kind of like if they don't

give you anything you kind of have to come up with something out of thin air but that's why I always say I need to be a fly on the wall

on your next date because I need to see every interaction that is the comedy that is what people pay millions for. Well, here's the thing. When it's a dry date, you just get very drunk.

Wait, wait, wait. And when they go to the bathroom, you go to the bar and you go, guess what, I'm on a terrible date. And then they take pity on you, and then they bring you free drinks. Oh. I thought you were going to say

you were going to start hitting with all the people at the bar. No, I don't want to be an asshole. I think that's it. Only us would go on someone else's podcast and we're like pitching a show for that person. But I think we need

the new flavor of love but with you. Oh my God. It's almost more, but it's not as serious, like it's not like a bachelor type of like where you're actually trying to find your love.

I can see it where it's almost more of a simple life flavor of love, almost a type of comedy reality TV where it's like they hire these crazies and it's you. No, I want to see the real. So maybe that you do find, they might almost a type of comedy reality TV, where it's like they hire these crazies. No, I want to see the real. They might have a couple of actually good people,

but it's like you, but these crazy, where maybe it would never work out, but it's almost like this bit. I mean, I would love to meet my version of New York, Tiffany Pollard. Oh, she's incredible. Okay, so we have come to the end. And do you guys have anything you want to promote? No.

So, I mean, we were promoting it before. You know, amongst all the rambling, we did talk about our tour that we were doing the end of this fall, Drag Boot Camp with Miss Shores in Malaysia. It's going to be really fun. We're pulling out all the stops. We're going to have some guest hosts. It's going to be really cute. But also this summer, me and Sugar were kind of... Because that's the thing. After Drag Race, people are always like,

oh, what's next? And for us, we understand the power of social media, so we almost kind of want to get back to really... We haven't been able to do that for a minute. So instead of just TikTok, we're going to be doing kind of this YouTube series called So Easy, So Fun. That's a little mantra.

Yeah, it's also a like mantra. We said it on the show as well. But we always say it. We're like, you know what? Life should be so easy and so fun. You don't want it to be the opposite. No one wants to have a hard and boring life. No, easy and fun.

You always want it to be easy and fun. So that's our show. It's kind of just a little vlog style show. We're going to have episodes, whether it's makeovers, whether it's just a drag con, whether it's just us showing different things in our lives. So that's going to be really fun. I had one more question. Oh, my God. It left my fucking brain.

Wait, YouTube. Being dry. Being dry. Dusty drag queens. Dusty. Promoting, rambling. Promoting, rambling. What the fuck was I going to ask you?

So easy, so fun. Dating. So easy, so fun. You're horny. Ioting, rambling. What the fuck was I going to ask you? So easy, so fun. Dating. So easy, so fun. You're horny. I'm always horny. Spongebob. Spongebob. I can't remember. This is like really upsetting me. It was a good question too. Well, you know what? Next time. Next time. Fuck!

Well, me being a fan of your book, I thought you were going to ask us if we were going to date you. I thought that's what it gets to. Well, yes, I'm going to ask that. Oh, wait, I did have a question that I do remember. So, wait, your first job, I know we have to end, but I just want to ask this. So, your first job was as camp counselors, and you guys lied about your age to get that job. Oh, my God, yeah, that's true.

And then how did they find out? Wait, how did you know that? My little research that my assistant Lindsay does. I'm screaming. Yeah, we got fired from our first job. How did they find out that you lied about your age?

Because we had a birthday party. It was in the middle of the summer. We were there for a week. You had to be 16, but we were 15. And then had a 16th birthday party at the camp. And we were posting it

on social media. But they don't follow us and then they saw it. They're like, you were 15 for those five days. You're out. They banned us from the town of Babylon from working there. And then my mom had to come in and kind of like yell at the people.

My mom went off. She slayed that. They revoked our checks. And they're like, no, actually, you should have been CIT's counselors in training. They took back our checks. It was dark. It was dark. And then I got a job at Old Navy.

They took your money? You got a job at Old Navy? The week after. Because I was finally 16. I'm banned from an Old Navy in Herald Square in New York because I was shoplifting. Can you even? Of course you should.

From Old Navy. They pay you to take the clothes. I can't wait. Because they let everyone shoplift there. That was their thing. They were like, you're not allowed to stop anyone. So people would literally come in. I'm like, work.

Not me. They got me. Wow. They got you, girl. When I worked at Lane Bryant, we would just let people steal. We watched a group of people take a whole rack of clothing, and Miss Norma was like, don't do it.

Honestly, I need to watch more interviews of you. I find your life fascinating. Obviously, your dating life, yes, that's iconic, but also just how you got to be this iconically hilarious person like

listen I've lived a life I was married once wait you were what what stay tuned for the next episode

where I talk about that no I'm kidding I'll tell you real quick well if you watch my first appearance on Conan I think I talk about it oh my god I married a man

well I'll get high later and watch that too okay then great then I won't tell you. Okay, okay, okay. I'm going to save it for later. Okay. Okay, well, that's it.

Oh, wait. No, that's not it. Would you two date me? Well, sweetie, I wouldn't date you. I would marry you. Spice! Thank you. You don't give me, like, date hook.

Like, you give, like, the girl you take home to the parents. You know what I mean? Oh! Oh! All right, Sugar, say something as equally nice. Um, I would love for you to be my babysitter. And you know what? Because naturally, I'm 12 years old.

And I feel like you, in my mind, you're, like, the gorgeous, fun, hilarious babysitter that, like, my parents still don't let me be by myself, but you would take me to the mall. I would. We would get Auntie Anne's. I would. So, like, you're my babysitter. Oh, my God, where you would take me to the mall. I would. We would get Auntie Anne's. I would. Oh my God, wait, you would be.

And then I'm going to help you find your date. Oh my God. This is great. Wow. I love how you're 24 years old and need to be babysat. I love that. Well, you two are 24. Yeah.

You're so young. Yeah. How is it? Is it good? I feel like I'm actually, in my mind, I'm like 14. Age is a feeling. That's what I always say. But also, I'm like 80.

Do you know what I mean? So just like multitudes, you know? I feel so old at times, and then sometimes I'll be in my house and be like, I can't believe I have a mortgage. Do you know what I mean? I'm like, how did I do that? Okay. Sugar, Spice, thank you so much for being here.

We've come to the end. If you like this episode of Why Won't You Date Me, you can like it, you can rate it, subscribe on Apple Podcasts or whatever. And then if you write me something dirty hitting on me to whywantyoudatemeepodcast at gmail.com, Mars, my producer, reads it. So don't send a dick pic. I will read it. Okay. This person said, hey,icole it was so great seeing you in studio with james marston if i had my way with you i'd lock the studio door behind us

and turn off all the mics so we can go to town and get as loud and filthy as we wanted i'd bend you over the mixing board and have you ride me in conan o'brien's chair seems disrespectful i will taste every inch of your sweet pussy while you moan in pleasure begging for more and when you're finally ready to explode I will bury my face between your thighs and drink every drop of your sweet nectar I don't know if you drink in that and I don't know if it's sweet

we will leave the studio steamy and sweaty and I pray Conan doesn't notice I soil his chair with my gum poor Conan but I often replace the chair because I don't want you to get in trouble. I'm gay. But for the sake of this, I pretend to be straight. Did I do good?

You did great. Okay. Bye-bye. That's it for Why Won't You Date Me? With me, Nicole Byer. Why Won't You Date Me is produced and engineered by all the sweetest woman I know, Marissa Melnick. It is executive produced by other wonderful people, Adam Sachs, Joanna Solo-Taroff, and Jeff Ross. Thanks for listening. I love you. Thank you so much.

We'll be seeing you next Friday with a brand new episode. What a dream. What a dream. Ha ha ha. Ha ha ha. This has been a Team Coco production.