Wild Times: Wildlife Education - Do All Animals Get Along With Their Relatives? - The Wild Times Ep. 113

Episode Date: March 6, 2023

This week we discuss having an alligator snapping turtle in a bath tub, culling tigers in India and we play the animal relatives game.   Visit https://thewildtimespodcast.com/ now!  Get your Wild Times Podcast merch: https://thewildtimespodcast.com/merch  Leave a review on iTunes Apple Podcast: https://thewildtimespodcast.com/itune...   Get Up To 4 Bonus Podcasts Per Month ▶▶ https://www.patreon.com/wildtimespod Subscribe to The Wild Times Podcast on YouTube ▶▶ https://www.youtube.com/@WildTimesPodWatch  More Episodes Here ▶▶ https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLP...   Follow The Wild Times Podcast on socials:  Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/wildtimespod/   TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@wildtimespod   Twitter: https://twitter.com/WildTimesPod Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/wildtimespod/  Listen to The Wild Times Podcast on:  Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/2cbFBzf...  Apple: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast...  Google: https://podcasts.google.com/feed/aHR0...  Anchor.fm: https://anchor.fm/wildtimespod/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@WildTimesPod  Enjoy, brosteners!  TWT 113 - The Breakdown   00:00 - Intro  02:12 - Alligator Snapping Turtle in A Bath Tub  13:15 - Spy Balloons   16:15 - AI Future  24:02 - Aaron Rodgers Darkness Retreat  28:48 - Culling Tigers in India  34:08 - Animal Relatives Game  42:35 - Battle Royale  50:45 - Outro   https://www.newbelgium.com/beer/fat-tire/ #podcast #wildtimespod

Wild Times. Here we go. Wild Times. Kyle literally just told me what episode number it is. I don't remember. He did. He said it.

I heard it. I don't know what it is either. It was literally, it was like I was a wall. It just bounced off me. I asked the question and did not retain the information. No.

Episode number 115. I am your host, Forrest Galante, the growologist, along with my two co-hosts. Three co-hosts? Two, two co-hosts? You have two dungeon-based co-hosts.

It does look very dark in both of your location. It's pretty weird, kind of. I don't think about how much it actually affects the vibe of watching the video, but I watched it the other day, and I was like, it's pretty weird. Yeah. Yeah, it's miserable. I was surprised to learn that we had a carpet cleaner,

cleaning our sofas and rugs. It's the loudest machine in the world, so I had to frantically scramble to the garage. and we're also packing to move in three days. So it's just a fucking shit show. It's the worst thing in the world is moving. And the older you get, the more of a pox on your life, it becomes. This is the last time.

This is the last time. I've heard that before. Yeah. At least I don't have a full zoo that I have to relapse. What would you do if you move for us? Like, what would you have to do? Bring in like one of those livestock trucks? No, no, I just put down all the animals and start again.

It's too much work. Just let them go. No, when we had the fires, we had to evacuate all the animals because we're like, it's one thing for the house to burn down. But if all of the critters die, it's like terrible. So we had like, we had two different friends with horse trailers come in. And they, they loaded up the miniature pigs and the horse and the donkey. We had to catch all the goddamn peacocks, which is always a nightmare. Like, they went to our friend's chicken farm.

scooped up all the turtles. They were like turtles and buckets in my hotel room. There was like a dozen Home Depot buckets with turtles in my hotel room. Yeah, it was a mess. It was a disaster. Speaking of turtles, I was thinking about this the other day. And I wanted, I was like, it was like fucking like two in the morning. I was like, I can't text forest about this now.

There's a little bit of an animal mystery that I've never gotten to the bottom of. Let's go. All right. So remember back in Louisiana on the, the woodpecker shoot? Uh-huh. Of course. So like day maybe five of the shoot, I can't remember, day five or six, you came upon that alligator snapping turtle when you were in the kayak or whatever. On the truck line.

Yeah. On the line. Yep. And that thing's a beast. And we were all like this super cool. It was a good little scene. You freed it and got rid of the line. Yeah, that was fun.

So on that on our last, I think it was our last day, second to last day. The tub turtle. Yeah. We were filming B-roll, like just B-roll of like cool. fisherman down by these docks. A guy pulls up, he's like, what are you doing? We're like, oh, we're filming a little, just some b-roll of these guys fishing. Like, nothing really.

And the guy has a fucking giant turtle in the flatbed of his truck. It's like a hundred pounder, Peter, like a hundred pound alligator snapping turtle in the flat bed of his pickup truck. How is a hundred pounds alligator snapping turtle? Like 50? 60, 70, maybe 50. I don't know. Very old and very large.

We have some videos we shot of the turtle that ended up in our tub. I got to see if I have a picture of that. I'll text it to Cal while we chat. But we're like, what are you? Dinosaur, by the way. Dude, wait till you see it in my, yeah, anyway, Patrick's going to set up for it. So we're like, what's going on with this turtle, bro? Because we had just been with one of these turtles like a few days before.

And, you know, they're super cool. And this thing was like dried out, just roasting in the hot summer sun and the flap out of his truck. And he said he'd had it in there for a few days alive. Yeah, geez. And I was like, all right. Or I can't remember it was for it. Some of it was just like, can we just buy the turtle off you?

Do you remember that was like a whole thing? Well, yeah, except it was illegal. So the guy was like, he was like, oh, it's illegal to sell you this turtle. And I was like, well, how do we take this? So we should explain this. He had, this guy was like a good old boy, like toothless redneck from Louisiana, right? And he was going to go eat them their turtle. And we're like.

Little did he know it was like an endangered species. Little did he care is a better. wave stating it. But he was just like, I'm going to eat this turtle. And we're like, please don't. Like, that sucks. And he's going to boil it. That's how they eat it. Boils it alive. Yikes. Man, I have pictures of the one from the, from the swamp. I'm looking for pictures of the one that ended up in the tub. I'll see if I can, I'll find the bathtub one and see if you can find it. Here, I'll send this to Kyle in the meantime. But anyway, yeah, so so I'm like, please don't kill this like endangered, very old turtle that are becoming increasingly

rare and he's like well what do you all want to do about it and i was like i'll buy it from you like 100 bucks 200 bucks every like he's like that's illegal i was like uh that's fine so is eating it but um like where do we go from here and the homie was kind of like oh i don't know i don't know and i was like what if i give you two hundred dollars for like your fishing rod over there and that's worth maybe 12 bucks and you give me a snapping turtle and it's two different exchanges like all right that we can do you know a little bit like skirt in the law. And yeah, hopefully we don't get in trouble for this. But basically, we figured out a way to rescue this turtle so that the guy wouldn't eat it. The problem was,

as Patrick was explaining, this was all taking place in the afternoon of our second to last day or last day in Louisiana. And we had to take it far away. I wanted to take it back to that same swamp area we've been working in to release it so that it wouldn't be caught because where we were working was a natural reserve. Like you just couldn't do it. And so, yeah, so we rescued this turtle and then had to, because it was our last day of the shoot, we were staying in a Marriott. Patrick, you want to set up what happened? Oh, my God. First, we have to get the turtle into the hotel.

So this thing's 100 pounds. So we put it in a giant, in a giant duffel bag. That was moving. Yeah, put it on a luggage cart and brought it into the Marriott and brought it up to Forrest's room. This didn't happen. And this is a movie you guys tried to pitch. Very much so happened. In fact, oh, look, there's a photo.

There's a photo. There's a video I sent you to, Kyle. No way. Please send me these. I don't have these. This is fantastic. Yeah. We took a video to send to our producing partner, Eric.

Kyle should have it in a second. But so we put it in the tub and turtles just in the tub. And we're like, okay, great. We're going to go out and get dinner. Go out. We get dinner. I think it was Jared's birthday, so we went to an outback steakhouse. It was his choice.

Yep. And where he ordered chicken tenders, which was the subject of much scrutiny. And then we come back and I go up to Forrest Room with him to check on the turtle. Turtle ain't in the tub anymore. Oh, no. Nope. He is snapping away. He has somehow gotten out of the tub and wedged himself in.

between the sink cabinet and the fucking floor. Yeah. He has climbed out of the tub left just the snake. Oh, here we go. The look on your face already. Just like, hmm. This was filling it up. The thing was so beat up.

It's funny. It doesn't even look like, yeah. It's funny. It looks like hell. But yeah, so he climbed out of that tub and we kept the bathroom door closed. So instead, he had wedged himself between like the free. standing sink in the wall. But in doing so, he had ripped the sink off of the wall.

So we had very much so damaged the Marriott hotel room. And then I had to like Jimmy this turtle who was just like, like just snapping away at me out and put him back in the tub. And then I forget what I did. I think I put like some pelican cases over the tub for the night and got up at like 4 a.m. and ran him out to the swamp. But my, here's the mystery to me is how did that turtle get out of the tub? I go back to that video, Kyle, or go back to that photo. Go back to that photo.

Here's the thing. So snapping turtles, not alligator snapper. Just keep that up for a second. Snapping turtles are known to be very good climbers. This is an alligator snapper, not very terrestrial, very rarely leave water. And look at how high the sides were. And by the way, if you touch the side of a bathtub, you fall over. Just from touching it. It's like it's straight. It's like Teflan. It's slicker than ice. How the turtle managed to climb his way from there up out of the tub. and destroy the bathroom, thus costing us several thousand dollars. I have no idea whatsoever. But we didn't save his life.

Okay, so it is a bit of an anomalous behavior that that turtle managed to climb out of there. This is coming from me who has turtles in every direction of his office. I would have said with 100% certainty that turtle was not getting out. Yeah. I mean, also it wasn't like, like I didn't really get a sense that the turtle was thankful that we saved him from being boiled. No, he's trying to eat me the whole time. He was real shitty about it.

Yeah, he had no idea. Yeah, he had a terrible attitude. I just asked Chat GPT if an alligator snapping turtle could climb out of a bathtub and chat GPT says it's highly unlikely, almost impossible that it could ever happen. Well, it's AI as fucking wrong then.

Yeah, dude, this whole thing literally sounds like the plot of a movie and I wouldn't believe you if you didn't have pictures. It's a true story. There was something else. There were so many things like that in Louisiana where like just random coincidences. Like we had, oh, go ahead.

No, I was just going to say Mitch on the dock. Well, that was amazing. What was the snake that we just caught? What was this snake that Justin's holding? It's a venomous snake. Probably a cotton mouth. I can't really tell from that picture. But it was probably caught in mouth

if I was making Justin hold a venomous snake. I can't believe Justin's still. alive after all his hijinks sunset. Yeah, we put him through a lot. Well, we caught a little cotton mouth and we released it. And, you know, we shot a little scene with it when Forrest caught it. And then a couple of people were like, I want a picture with the cotton mouth. And.

And, uh, Patrick. No, I do. I do. Oh, I used the steak hook. Good, good, good. Even after you, after you threw his shirt on the, uh, what was it? This was pre cobra. Oh.

Yes. Preco. The cobra was the last straw. He's like, I'm never playing. snakes with you ever again after you know yeah yeah you made me you made me play snakes oh there we go oh my god a lot uh unbelievable so we just just released it and we finished whatever we were doing and then we were we were going to review some trail camera footage um and so we were like hey just like let's just go back and just sit you know we were like maybe a couple hundred yards from where

we were filming um was like a little camp that we'd set up and i was like just sitting you know you can sit in your tent and review the footage for shade. And so Forrest, somehow somebody had done something. I think Mitch put a light in there, left the tent unzipped. Oh, yeah. Forrest just goes and sits down in his tent

and literally almost sits on the cotton mouth. Yep, very, very close. I'll show you. I have a picture of the camera. Like in the 15 minutes since we'd released it, it or it was just a different cotton mouth just went inside his tent. Right, right.

It's warm in there, right? How bad will that be if a cotton mouth gets you? Is that like similar to a rattlesname? Yeah, pretty similar. It's not great. It's a viper. It's going to rot some flesh. You're going to be very sick. You have to go to a hospital. But yeah, no, I couldn't believe that. So we had, yeah, this thing crawled right up under the tent 15 minutes after we released it. Or it was a different one. We did catch more snakes on that swampy trip than anywhere we've ever been. It was crazy. It was very snakey. It was like a snake every 150 feet. Wow. What happened with Mitch? I'm curious. You guys kind of just passed over that. I think we've told the story on the pot. Is this where he dropped his camera in the water? No, his camera stayed bone dry. He fell in the water.

He went in the water. We were doing some eating and drinking. Kyle, did you get the text I sent you? Pull up those photos. Let me show you the feast we were having. This was fun. This was a Patrick Dunn thing. Look at this feast.

So we just had this crazy Louisiana crawfish boil as like our welcome to Louisiana. It was like pounds of sausage and shrimp. and it was awesome. Oh, yeah. And Mitch was filming it, and he decided to, like, get a wide shot and just backed right off of the dock

into the swamp. It was so funny. Dude, foot off the dock. And it saved the camera, though. Kept the camera above his head. It was very, very funny, though. Yeah, that's his talent, keeping the camera dry.

Trying to see if I had any. He was such a bad band. What's come across your radar this week? What are you into? Any alien sightings? Did we get to the bottom of the new objects? there's so much going on. Dude, there's been, I think, four now,

uh, items, UFOs, uh, shot down over Canada and America over like the past couple weeks. Or actually, I think it was been a little longer than that, but,

and it's, uh, yeah, they, they said that the, the last three were not from China. The first one was, it was big news.

It was all over the place. Everybody was up in arms. And, uh, because they would, for some reason, they didn't want to shoot it down. But it, was a Chinese spy balloon.

And then the next three, they haven't recovered the debris yet or whatever. They're saying they haven't. And they're also saying at the same time that they are definitely not Chinese spy balloons. So it's still a mystery. Yeah. Yeah. And there was a recent thing just a day or two ago where a plane dropped 1,600 feet,

like carrying passengers. Did you see this, Peter? You know what I'm talking about? I didn't see it. No, I didn't see that one. There was like a passenger plane traveling over, I don't know, Montana or something, and all of a sudden the pilot made the plane drop like 1,600 feet or something crazy and said it felt like a roller coaster and didn't explain why.

And it was because they got a warning that there was something else in the air. Oh, wow. This is crazy. I got a feeling that disclosure is coming soon. They're really ramping it up here. We're going to find out something. We're a couple weeks away from a full-blown invasion, me thinks. Yeah, yeah.

I mean, I hope so. What do you think that would do with the stock market? It's all the time to buy, yeah. Yeah, it is all he thinks about. Yeah, buy fucking defense stocks, buy a bunch of Raytheon and. Dude, speaking of which, also across my desk recently, and I know it's not animal related, but Google just getting crushed in the stock market, went down, I think, 8%, 6 or 8% after, Open AIs chat GPT

shit came out and Microsoft said they're going to incorporate it into Bing the search engine and I'm like my buddy was hit me up like a month. Eight words I don't know what you're saying. Yeah, are they going to crush? Just continue. Wait, yeah, why is Google getting slammed? I'm sorry, I had a pause and look at the Spiceman's message that says

let's not apologize when we bring up stuff that's not animal related. Fuck off. All right. I'm sick of hearing it. I get it. I get it. I do it because you guys do it. If this podcast was up to me, I wouldn't talk about anything animal related. You have a vast and comprehensive wildlife knowledge. I agree. You're an encyclopedia.

Shut up most of the time. But I like it. I learn it. It's like doing a podcast with Attenborough, if I'm being honest. It is. It really is. Just as soothing. All right, tell us more. So first, I was just saying, so my buddy hit me up like a month ago or something. And he's like, hey, man, what do you think? Like, he's like, I'm pretty nervous about my Google stock. Like I think what do you think about this chat GPT shit? This this AI coming out that Microsoft has a huge they invested like 10 billion dollars in it. So they own a large portion of it. Okay. And, uh, which is what Jet the biggest AI, the most like, uh, the best AI right now is called Jet Chat GPT 3. And, uh, and I was like, I was like, dude, it's Google. They've been working on

AI. I'm sure they just haven't released yet. It's fine. And then, next thing you know, Google lays off like some absurd amount, 6,000 or something of people, and then their stock drops like 6%. And it's because

the Open AI Microsoft announced that they're going to incorporate the AI into Bing search results. And if you've used the AI, dude, it's like you'll never use Google again. Like it answers everything pretty much perfectly. And the

current version of it doesn't even have access to real-time results. It only has access to stuff up to 2021 that's on the internet. So once it's incorporated and you type in like a search and it goes to those actual results and gives you the AI answers that way, it's over, man. You'll never have to go to any website. You'll never have to do anything again. It'll all just be right there in front of you. I think porn is going to be the interesting thing. how so. Here's how so. People that are spending a lot of time on porn

are incredibly lonely, okay? It's true. I'm just putting it out there. It's true, yeah. You have a computer that's generating the most beautiful girl you've ever seen in your life, according to your preferences,

that is a fake person that is going to be your absolute best friend. You have no reason to, And all you have to do is elicit sexual act from that AI creature, right? So I'm not saying that you're going to, you know, you're not going to be dating them, but you're going to be completely smitten and enamored if you're a lonely, dorky guy with this unreal creature, AI creature that's on your computer that's giving you whatever your favorite sexual preferences are. That's the most beautiful thing you've ever seen.

That's also your best friend. A zillion percent agree. Tell me that's not what's going to happen. sort of the end of the human race because yes you're you're yeah so your your make so these are AI created females yeah go to the second one there

which looks like a real human yeah that's AI like a real human are you sure that's not a real person no I see this is what I'm talking about this you won't feel it's AI yeah I can't tell I thought that was a pretty girl no this is why you're right for us this is why I just I was just duped like I'll pay her for sexual acts

right now. Okay, so you're saying a lonely, dorky guy, but everyone who at age 12 is lonely and dorky, right? Correct. So suddenly a generation of 12-year-olds has access to this, then those become 25 and 35-year-olds who are just dating an AI creature. Now they're married. Yeah. It's the end of the human race.

There's no more reproduction. And why, also, by the way, even if it's not, like, that's taking it to a very extreme. dream. But even if it's not, you're never going to find a mate that you like as much as this fantasy AI thing that is perfect in every sense, that never fights with you, that never nagged you to do anything. It's like perfect in every sense. It does all your favorite sexual acts in a, in a video. Perfect in every sense. You're like, why would I marry a woman who's just going to drain my money and bicker at me? And, you know, like, you're like, why would I do that? Like, I have this virtual girlfriend who is perfect in every way.

that's the end of the human race. You've been like four movies that have this plot, by the way. I know. You're definitely right. And if you started using it, you would be even more scared because it's going to be like the internet is nothing but AI generated. You won't know if you're talking. You already probably don't know half the time that you're talking to an AI and comments, everything that's out there. It's so good already.

This is also like iPhone 1 AI. You know, if you look back to iPhone 1 AI now or iPhone 1 now, you're like, Jesus, that thing was crap. Like the camera was useless and I could barely do anything and had all these clunky buttons. And imagine what it's going to be like in 15 years. Well, and here's where, you know, animals become important again because like real life isn't going to be the only thing that's not AI. Like you're going to have to get away from the computer to know what the hell's going on in the real world or else you're just, It's just going to be a bunch of misinformation, AI bullshit with fake, you know, sexual partners. And I do think that that pendulum is going to swing.

I think you're going to, and I think we're actually already starting to see it with the liver kings of the world and people that are promoting this like primal ancestral, like go back to your human basics. I mean, even Joe Rogan promotes it, right? I think I think the pendulum is going to swing and the divide's only going to become greater. But I think I everything I just said, I obviously believe, and I believe. everything you're saying, Peter. I'm saying that I think there's going to be a big movement for people to be like, fuck all this technology, fuck these cell phones and these computers, like, I need to get outside more because it's becoming so encompassing. And I'll give you an example of that that I find kind of interesting. You know, I coach rugby every year, right? Youth rugby when I'm home.

When I started coaching youth rugby, which is like 10ish years ago, the kids would come off the pitch and they'd be staring at their cell phones. They'd be on, you know, social media was big. It was hot. It was trending, blah, blah, blah. blah. I feel like those, the kids now, like the high school kids that I'm working with now, are not nearly as addicted to their phones as our generation and even the kids' generation, like, up until like 10 years ago, because the kids now have totally grown up with it. They've had phones their whole lives and they don't feel this like dopamine hit addiction to it and have to get to it the second they're done with something else. Like, in fact,

I don't even see kids grabbing their phones before or after training anymore at all. Like, I'm more likely to grab my phone and check it. than they are. And it seems like they're just like, they're sort of just, you know, blasé to it because they've grown up with it. Social media has always been available. It's not like this new cool thing. Although there's new cool stuff on it every day, it's not like, oh, man, I got to check social. I got to do this. And I've noticed too, maybe it's just because I'm getting old and less fun. But if I like write something in the text group to the kids, take some hours to respond as opposed to back in the day. Well, that's just because they don't like you.

But that's what I'm saying. I'm old and lame now. But I'm not. I don't know, man. I think maybe like we're not as doomed as we think. And the next generation is going to be a little bit jaded by all this like digital technology and just be like, fuck it. I don't care that much. Hey guys. If you're enjoying it. Whoops.

One more time. Guys, if you like The Wild Times, check us out on Patreon. We put out four extra podcasts per month. That's one commute a week that you're just going to be laughing and learning the whole time in the car. Let me do something else. This is the late night content, stuff that we can't. show on on YouTube because they'll kick us off YouTube. It's the Cinemax of Podcasts.

Uncensored, Raw Dog, it's the Cinemax of Podcasts. Check it out. Link right here. Did you hear about, I don't know if you guys follow NFL sports news, but have you heard about Aaron Rogers and what he's doing, quarterback for the Green Bay Packers? I know who he is, but I don't know what he's doing. So he's torn on whether or not he wants to return to the NFL,

if he wants to play for the Packers, he's not sure what he wants to do. And he said he's going on a four-day darkness retreat, and that when he finishes the retreat, he'll have his answer. He went into some description of what this is. You go into a small house. It's completely blacked out. They basically put your food through a slot, and you're in silence, and in complete darkness.

Wow. And there's a bed, you know, you can sleep. And you basically have four days of, like, sensory deprivation just to get away from, you know, That's wild. Kind of cool. So it's four full days. I think there's a toilet.

What do you think? What do you think would happen? Like, do you think you would, like, get some sort of intense, like, clarity of your thoughts? Or do you think you would just be terrified and start pounding on the door to get out? I'd be bored out of my gullet. I would have nothing to do. I couldn't do it. I'd be miserable.

So you don't even have a book or anything, right? No, no. You can't see. It's fucking pitch black. No, I would hate it four days. I don't think I could. I can barely. do it for a night. If I go to bed and I'm not sleepy, I'm lying there with my eyes closed,

I'm like ready to punch my wife lying next to me just for the attention, like just to get her just for a reaction. Dude, yeah, it's, it would be hard. It's a little extreme. Like I could do it if it wasn't just in darkness. Like if it was just no, no book, no nothing, but at least like the room, like it would be light and dark and not weird. I think I could do it. And there would be some clarity that came at the end of it. I think the idea is that you, you know, you recalibrate a little bit from the intense sensory overload

that you get from screens and just the way society is. So it's like, it's supposed to be hard, right? It's supposed to be a challenge because you have to just live with your thoughts for four days. But what about you?

I think it's a poor, yeah, let's hear your... No, no way. I know that I couldn't do more than probably 12 hours. I would try to sleep for eight hours and then four hours of conscious.

and then I'd be out. Yep. There's no way I could do it. I think it's a very poor way to reset. I think you're much better off to get dumped on an island with nobody around. Right. You left to your own devices. And like instead of not thinking or rather instead of just being left alone with your own

thoughts, your thoughts are targeted towards something beneficial to you in the immediate future like survival, right? Sure. Versus like, oh, I'm just going to lie here and think about my life and not stare at a phone or stare at a TV. Like that's useless. Like you're still, you're still. you're still a useless creature in that situation,

whereas you get dumped on an island. If your thoughts aren't about how do I make fire, how do I get water, how do I build a shelter, how do I catch a fish, you're going to be really, really miserable. So your thoughts are in the present. They're in the here and now, and they're focused on you and what you need to survive.

And that's very grounding and reconnecting versus this like ethereal, like, oh, I just need to think of the big picture and take a step back from my cell phone. It's like, fuck off with that. People don't need that. not what humans do. Humans work on like bettering their surroundings.

Yeah, we're curious and social creatures. I mean, what he's talking about doing is basically how they punish people when they're in prison. So I definitely agree with Forrest though as far as like the novelty and the curiosity, which is human nature that got us where we're at

the use of tools, things like that using our brains figuring things out. But the problem that he's trying to get away from is, you know, it's that all of those resources that we have that make us human and make us who we are is all directed towards tech now. It's all towards computers and all the tool use and everything is towards typing on a thing, being on a thing. All the social is being on a social network talking to people through a phone. You can still have all those things. Those things

aren't inherently bad. It's just everything's overload and super sped up. So like if Forrest said you get dropped off on an island with your wife. for something or a couple friends, it'd be just probably, it'd be a much better reset. I think so. Forrest, do you have all your gear in your office right now?

Nope, I had to ship it to. So I'm going to to South Carolina tomorrow for a public speaking thing. And I didn't want to haul the gear to South Carolina and then on, which is the way that my route's going. So I had to ship all the gear to Mitch about a week ago.

Oh, okay. Yeah. So I have one very small carry-on duffel, which is not very exciting to show. Copy. Okay. I saw something in the news I wanted to get your opinion on. Please.

Big news. One of our favorite animals, Tiger, is involved. So in India, in Kerala, I don't know if you know where that is. Kerala National Park, yeah. Okay.

So a farmer was attacked by a tiger. Awesome. Sparking. Okay. Well, just recently, and it sparked local, outrage. And the wildlife minister in Kerala said that he's going to consider solutions to bring the tiger population down because it's gone up, right? We were saying it was a great

conservation story that it's gone up. And he said that they're looking at either sterilization efforts or possibly calling the tiger population in Kerala. I mean, where do we start with how stupid that is. You're going to call one of the most, first of all, it's blatantly illegal. I suppose they can change the laws because it's the government, but it's blatantly illegal. Culling Tigers is insane. There were less than 4,000

of them in the wild. Fucking unbelievable. A few years ago. It's just like it's stupid on every level. I mean, that's a knee-jerk reaction from a disconnected politician who thinks that that is going to favor people voting for him by making a statement that

they think that tigers should be called and he thinks that people will like that because it makes the people safe. Like, it's just dumb in every regard. So a so-called environmentalist in India named Madav Gadil, I hope I'm pronouncing that right. He said he likes the idea and they should do a hunting tag system where you can get a tag and go hunt a tiger, which we all know who's going to be doing that. Yeah, it's Donald Trump. No, it's, it's incredibly stupid. I mean, there's nothing wrong with trophy hunting. Well, I have ethical dilemmas with trophy hunting, but there's nothing wrong with it when it's done appropriately and the funds are used for conservation. But that won't be the case. You know, it just won't be. And there's not enough fucking tigers. It's just a stupid conversation to

even bring up, to be honest. And that's not a dig at you. It's just a stupid thing to even be thinking that way. That's coming from, like I say, just completely disconnected politicians with no foresight whatsoever. What do you think they would charge for a tiger tag? What do you think Americans would be willing to pay to go on to tiger? Half a million at least. How does it work in Africa? What does it cost for a lion tag? Oh, I'm not sure.

I mean, it used to be like 100,000, maybe 200. I really don't know. I'm just talking out of my butt. It's not something I've ever considered. So I have no idea. I mean, you know, I know that it raises a lot of money. You can pay 100 grand, go get a tiger, and most of that goes into conservation. But we have a lot of lions, you know.

In fact, in a lot of places, like, what's the name of that park? I'm blanking on it now. It doesn't matter. There's one down near Bulawayo in southern Zimbabwe. There's like 200 lions in a single national park. There's way too many lions. And that's because it's a small condensed area, and there was so much prey that the lions have exploded. So those lions need to be managed.

And in order to pay for anti-poaching units for the rhinos of which they have a whole lot as well, if they sell a couple lion tags here and there, well, again, I don't ethically agree with it. That pays for that park to continue. That's fine. That's very different from a few solitary. Hold on one second. Hoover, come here. A few solitaire.

Yeah, there's less than 3,000 tigers in India. There's over 20,000 wild lions in Africa. Exactly. 3,000 tigers and you're going to start color. them. I mean, it's just, it's unbelievably It's terrible. It's so It's so dumb, man. These people need to get away, get away from the tech

killing fucking tigers. Why? Such a cool animal. Oh, hey buddy. Who's that? All right, show everyone on the pod what you got. Pull them out. What'd you get? Well, unboxing. What'd you get? Fishies.

Bates. Oh, we're adding to the No, fishies for the turtles. Whoa, little goldfish. Wow, nice. Are you going to feed those to the turtles? Yeah. Okay.

You're on a podcast on the internet right now. Teaching the kid early about the food chain. Oh, yeah. He knows a lot about death already. It's not good. All right. Take those fishies home. I'll see in a bit.

Go on. Okay. Go ahead. Okay. So you find the turtles just common goldfish? Common dime store goldfish. The kind you get at the fair. Only once in a while because they're very high and fat and it's a treat.

But because I'm leaving tomorrow, they're all getting a nice little fat. and goldfish treat so that they still love you. What do they eat normally? Just like the pellet from the store or something? Just pellets. Yep. Exactly. That's good.

Nice treat. Good. Put on you, mate. If I ate corn flakes every day. Yeah, it's like, it's like bacon for turtles. So, you know, the, the Jess went out shopping. I didn't realize, I don't think I told her I was doing a podcast or they wouldn't have disturbed me.

But, yeah, they went out and got mice for the snakes, goldfish for the turtles. All the good things. I got an idea for a game, if you guys want to play. A little trivia game. Let's do it. I think the Brosners will enjoy this. This will make you more interesting when you're on your Tinder and you're chatting with.

Smart. You know what I mean? It's always fun to pull up a little trivia. When you're chatting with your AI girlfriend, this will make you more interesting. Yeah, exactly. She'll love you more. All right, this is called the Animal Relatives game.

Oh, here we go. What I have here is I have a list. Okay. So, Kyle, pull up a picture when I say the animals here. And what you're going to do is you're going to guess what its closest living relative is. Okay? You get what I'm saying? You know how they're all kind of related, everything branched off?

All right. Let's start with a giraffe. This is going to be funny because I guarantee it's like something ridiculous. And I'm going to be like, oh, it's obviously like monkey and gorilla, but they're not at all. What's the closest living relative to the giraffe? Peter, you go first. To a giraffe? Wow.

I'm going to go, look at that face. Camel. Camel. It's a good guess. It's a good guess. I'm not going to do very well at this, but this is one that I know is the American Pronghorn Antelope. But I don't think I'm going to do very well at the rest of the trivia game, but I know this one.

According to my list, it is actually the Okapi. Oh, yeah. Well, that's a type of giraffe, really. Is it? I mean, sort of. Yeah. That's a no, Kathy. That looks nothing like it. That's a type of giraffe. What? It's like a zebra horse. Literally, I think they call it the forest giraffe is like its other name. Really? Wow. That is interesting.

All right. All right. All right. All right. How about this? Keep going. What's the closest living relative to the whale family? you know, say a whale. Peter? You're running-of-the-mill whale. I want to say shark, but a shark's not a mammal, so I'm going to go dolphin. I want to say Peter's ex-wife. I'm going to hold on that for a moment for a lot.

Wow, this is a public podcast, sir. I don't, I've never been able for that statement. That's true. You've never matter. She can sue you. The hippopotamus. That is correct. No, get out of here.

How the hell? How'd you know that? What's the story? I'm just getting lucky so far, only because I know a lot about hippos that they're closely related. It's ludicrous. Type in hippo-whale relation. I want to see some comparison or something, because this is nonsense. I don't believe it. Oh, okay. So it shows you how it, oh, the common ancestor right there, what it might be, like a crocodile, uh, hippo type thing. All right. Interesting. Um, very.

There's so much calamity going on on that side. my office. I know. I just fell. I started screaming, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow,

ow, there's a goldfish. I can see a goldfish on the floor from here that didn't make it. Wow. Times. Yeah.

So, that's my life. What about the flying squirrel? The flying squirrel. Do you think it might have a close living relative? I'm going to go, I'll go with bat.

A bat. I'll go common squirrel. Just a squirrel that doesn't have the wing flaps. Common squirrel would be the more reasonable answer than bat. But the actual

answer is rec uh porcupine really wow yeah they're both rodents i just didn't know that was wow that's wow it's more closely related to a porcupine than a common squirrel kyle see if you can bring up a relational chart to this too i want to see all of the common ancestors that's the most interesting part to me i mean porcupines live in trees porcupine flying squirrel that's not a real creature now okay well i mean fucking interesting. I'm learning more than ever today. Yeah, I didn't know that. I didn't know that. Definitely for my Tinder dates. Don't tell my wife. What about the

the elephant shrew? It's a type of shrew. It's a type of shrew. Pull up a picture of Kyle. This one's really fun. Okay, I know more of these than I realized I did. You've consumed. See, shit sticks there. You don't have access to it

until something jogs it loose. Okay. It's like a rodent. So I'm just going to go, I mean, this thing looks exactly like a mouse with a big nose. But it's called the elephant shrew because it's more closely related to elephants than it is shrews.

That is corrah. That's bonkers. Isn't that wild? It's tiny. How big is this thing? Oh, like this big. Tiny. Absolutely tiny.

You think that's why elephants are so scared of mice? They're like, I don't want to step on myself. That's right. It's cannibalism. All right. Yeah, the elephant trues,

four inches and weighs between one and one and a half ounces. And it's closely related to an elephant. Yeah. It's fucking wild. Which is an elephant the largest land mammal? Yeah. I think it is. Oh, yeah.

Dude, that's crazy when you think about that. Wow. Yeah. All right. All right. I got one more for you. One more for you. The Tasmanian devil.

I'd like to see. Give me a refresher picture of this so I can see it looks like. No, no, I don't. Actually. I mean, I'm thinking that they're, so it's a marsupial carnivore. You know, maybe this is a trick and I'm going to go thylacine. Is your closest living? No, because I know it's not. That's a, that's a qual or a Dunnard. That's also for us going on record that the thylacine is extant.

That's right. That's right. It's called the closest living relative. Ah, boy. I'm going to go qual. It's got to be a qual. I'm going to go Dungary, another marsupial, well, well known in Australia. Dungaroo.

Dungaroo. Are you just saying words? Dunkeroo? Dungaroo? What am I thinking of a candy or something? Dunkeroo is a snack that was popular in the mid-90s. Are you saying kangaroo? Well, I thought Dungaroo was an actual marsupial.

I'll go with kangaroo or wallaby. That is cora. Wait, Peter's correct? Yeah, kangaroo. Not the snack cookie, Dunkeroo's. Okay. What a turn of events. What a turn of events.

That's interesting. I would have assumed like a qual or another. Morpupial Carnivore was a closer living relative. That's pretty fun. I like this game. I'll try to find another list to do it again. I actually have a Dunkeroo's story. Oh, here we go.

Of course you do. Let's have it. There was a Dunkeroo's commercial where it was like an animated kangaroo and he would sing the song. You'd sing Dunkeroo's, Dunkeroo's, you don't just eat you dunkerroos. Yeah. So I actually got into my first fist fight because of that song. Okay. Go on.

Yeah. Well, so this kid that lived in my neighborhood, Ian came over after school in seventh grade, and we were playing video games. And he kept singing it, but he was singing, you don't just eat, you dunk them roos? And I was like, that's not the words. And we didn't have the internet to pull it up. And he just insisted it was dunk them roos.

And so we got into a big argument and decided to wrap our hands in socks and go out in the middle of the street and have a fist fight. That's great. That's my first fight. That's great. Who won? Nobody. We just punched each other in the head a few times.

It hurt real bad and hurt our hands and our heads. And then like a neighbor lady came out and was like, what are you doing? Get out of the street. Almost nobody wins a fight pre-age 16. I won one more time. Pre-age 16? Yeah. Can I tell you?

I think I might have already told it on the podcast against my brother when he, when I elbowed him in a. face and by accident knocked him out and then tied him to a tree in my front yard so everybody could see and he literally was there for hours until uh somebody one of his friends moms came by and like made me undo him i tell you about that i consider that a one fight that's all that is you knocked him out and then tied him up which is technically taking a hostage with a neon green dog leash i remember very vividly this incident um by the way setth isaacson one of our brosner suggested that game Classic from the beginning.

All right, well, I've got a Battle Royale while we're doing game. What? Yep. Do we haven't done one of those in two weeks. Two weeks. Battle Royale idea from Stewart, Star 22 on Instagram. Battle Royale suggestion, create the best ocean killer from land animal attributes. Three attributes.

Oh, boy. Yep, three attributes and one body. Good luck. So best ocean-based killer. Three. Okay. I'm going to grab my... So per the typical rules, we pick elements from three animals to create a new creature, and it scales up to the size or down to the size of the body.

Correct. And they're all going to just do battle for no reason. They're going to do battle in an aquatic environment, because this is the best ocean killer. Ocean, specifically. Specifically ocean, not fresh water. You can pick a hippo, but hippos don't swim, Peter, so they're not going to do very well. Okay, okay. All right, okay.

Do they have to be swimming? since you have more knowledge than us? Absolutely. Okay. All right. Very simple. I am going to start with the body of a polar bear. That is a land-based animal, fantastic swimmer.

It's got that big shaggy coat, which is going to keep it warm for hours, big huge claws. Oh, wait. Hold on, just body. That's fine. Body of the polar bear. Okay. Wow. That's pretty devastating.

I'm going to take the head of the polar bear. I want that neck and head stocky, incredibly strong bite force, big jaws, head of a polar bear. Peter, I can literally see him on the AI GPT thing right now. No, no, I'm on Google now. Best Ocean Greacher. No, I'm on Google searching, trust me. What is your keyboard made out of wood? It's the loudest typing.

It's literally a really nice soft keyboard. You don't have to slam your hand. on it. Just shut your fucking meat paw face up, you ugly weasel. All right, here we go. I'm sick of your interjections. Type it in the silent chat if you want to talk about it so I can bring you. I'll type silently. God, I hate you. All right. Let's go, Peter. Let me guess. What's the fucking game? All right. Characteristics of a land of land animals for an ocean killer. All right, let's go. I'm going with the, uh, what? The body and space. speed ability of a cheetah.

Cheetah. The bot? Shut up. So those are your two picks? Oh, so I'm going with two? No, I'm going with the body. And it's also its ability to go fast of the cheetah. Yes, yes, I am.

Body and legs of a cheetah. I'm going with the head and jaw of a crocodile. And, uh, not a land animal. Yes, it is a land animal. Fine. Just give it to them. It's not worth the argument.

They live on the land. I'll pull up a crocodile living on grass right now, you SOB. That exclusively look. Nobody has said exclusively. Okay. So an animal that has been on the land is what you're going with. That's right. A cheetah body.

Both of you picked the same thing a bear, and I'm the one who's got a... Okay. All right, Pat. All right. I want to add some stuff that can get you. So I'm going to go. Smart. Yeah, some stuff that can get you.

I want the tail of an orangutan to go along. What? All right, go ahead. You want to get whipped with an orangutan tail? I do. All right.

Well, not underwater. You don't. Yeah, where it goes even slower, sure. All right, Forrest is up to round out his future. I'm looking something up quickly. That's the worst pick in battle royale history. The absolute worst. Well, also, real quick, Kyle, just do me a favor on Google image of orangutan tail.

Wait, they don't have one. Correct, yeah. You literally get skipped a turn. That's how bad that. No, he just gets that little nub, that little nub that's like this big. You want the aerodynamic when you whip me with it. You can't reach anything. It's needlepoint sharp.

That's right, like a rat. It's actually very dull and round like a cue ball. All right, I've got the body of a polar bear. I am going to give it. the up for two here. I'm going to give it the appendages of a duck. Now a duck is a land aerial animal for the most part, but it's got big flat paddle feet scaled up to polar bear size. A couple little wings for flying. It's got the appendages of a duck. That's right. Thank you, Kyle. Okay. I mean, that's got to be the most non-threatening, non-killer-esque appendage on any

animal. At the size of a polar bear? Absolutely. What's it going to do, whap you with its fin? Look at those claws on that thing. And by the way, it's very mobile now. It can dive underwater. It can swim. It can fly. It can tread water. And when I give it.

You definitely avoid pets orangutan tail. That's for sure. No, well. I literally had to Google that. That's why I was like, hold on a second. Because I was like, wait a minute. Orangans don't have tails. Am I?

Am I crazy? And then I had to Google it. All right, polar bear body, duck appendages. We have let down this brocer, by the way. And the head, the head of a safety. stable antelope. I'm going to give it some sharp horns. So it can just do some horns are good. Charging. Yep. Head of a stable antelope, Kyle, if you will. Yeah. Oh, wow. All right.

I'll give you that one. Can do some charging, do some damage. Also on the, if it wants to attack with the pointed end of the horns, all it has to do is whip its head back. It has to swim under, which it won't be able to do to my animal. It will not be able to swim underneath. No. Now with that huge tail. So I'm going with the body. going with the body of a jaguar. They're excellent swimmers. It has spots, so it's very attractive. It's true.

To add to my pole of the head. But true. And my orangutan tail nub. It's ludicrous. I mean, it's seriously. Nah, it's ferocious. You got a good shot here. You got a cheat a body of crocodile head.

Do something smart with your swimmers and you're good to go. Listen, it's going to get the talons of a cassowary, bitches. That's right. This thing is going to be... I mean, it's just going to destroy your animal pet is like a penguin. It's essentially a threatening as a penguin. Because it shows the head. Well, that's not a land animal.

It certainly is I could show you a picture of it. Show me a crocodile on land. Please. Chat, T.PT. I mean, those talons will be sharp, but you won't have a head. Those talons are going to go up into your animal's ability to swim. This was a swimming battle. well listen they don't there's no i mean yeah okay that's a good point okay

prockettow's very uh you know it can go on the water but it doesn't need to we uh we sort of botched this one let us know what creature you would make that would be the ultimate swimming beast from three land animals uh far or and vote for hours let us know who won was it forest polar bear body with duck appendages the d appendages and a stable animal Antelope head. Was it Patrick's bowler bear head on a jaguar's

body with a nub orangutan tail? It has no attacking power except for its mouth. Or would it be Peter's cheetah body with the talons

of a cassowary and the head of a crocodile, which is definitely going to be the most fun to create, by the way. And yeah,

let us know what you're better picked than ours. It is. Yeah. Drop it in the commence. I think we're done.

I got a run, fellas. I got a very important Hollywood meeting with lots of cocaine involved. Nice. And fat tire? 90s meeting. Cocaine and fat tire, right? Absolutely.

It's a great combo. Very good. All right, boys. Well, love you guys. See you, Pat. See you, buddy. I'll do the outro. He doesn't need to be here.

No, I prefer that he isn't. It's like I can finally let my hair down now. I don't feel so scared. When it was just me and you talking shit about him on that other podcast we did, I felt really good that day. I came out of that chat with like a big smile on my face for the day. Ditto. Ditto.

Yeah. I mean, anything else you want to talk about or should I do the thing? Let's do the thing. Do the thing. Listen, guys, everybody, girls, brosners, cystners, go to wild times. Dot club forward slash info for all the links to all the stuff, including the Patreon where you get four extra episodes. Oh, look at that.

You got a QR code. You can also click that or put it on your phone. I'm doing it. Boris is going to do it right now. I didn't even know it was a thing. You just take a picture of that QR code. Go to the Patreon at patreon.com forward slash wild times pod. And four extra episodes per week.

You can also get those episodes on. Wow. It said somebody scanned the code right on the screen. Wow. That's amazing. You can also get those episodes on Spotify. same thing, exact same episodes with video included,

just if you use Spotify, it's easier to do it through there. One or the other, don't sign up for both. There's been some confusion there. Wild Times.com, forward slash info for all the links where you can listen, watch the pod, sign up, support us, everything.

And thank you Fat Tire for supporting us. I've been drinking it mixed with my coffee this morning. Love you guys. And if you made it this far, if you listen through that rant, because I'm still believed that nobody listens through the outro. Just put in the chat, and we won't tell Patrick, we won't explain this. We'll wait until he brings it up. Pat's head looks like an orangutan tail. Just write that.

Just don't write anything else. Just write Pat's head looks like an orangutan tail. He's going to get very offended. He's very self-conscious. He's not here to defend himself. There's a good opportunity to take a jab at the old producer. He might quit the podcast, which we've been trying to push him out for a year and a half. Such a dream. That would be such a dream. All right, everybody. Good night. and I chat GPT can replace Pat easily. I bet we could make a prettier pat on the AI. Prettyer Pat.

Oh, I think I pulled an upper back muscle.