Wild Times: Wildlife Education - Elephant Deaths in Botswana, Blood Type Mystery, & Forrest's Egg

Episode Date: July 20, 2020

Forrest talks about mysterious elephant deaths in Botswana, while Pat bashes scientists and their aloofness on blood. The gang tackles an important Taco Bell slogan mystery. This week's battle royale will make you barking mad. Join us on this week's audio adventure.   Follow us @wildtimespod More at https://thewildtimespodcast.com We love you!

And we are back with the Wild Times. Wild times. Wow, thrown out the Taco Bell reference and the meager bomb. Wow, I am. How do we get them as a sponsor? Can we get them as a sponsor, God damn it? Yeah, next time I go, I'll ask the drive-thru worker. Okay, smart.

You're joined today by myself, Forrest Galante, the human blobfish, Mr. Peter Fitzer. What's up, Peter? It's a blob slash warthog, thanks. It's nothing. I'm good. I had Taco Bell for dinner last night. one at poker, feeling good today. You two look terribly stressed out and awful. So I and well, before I let's, before we get into Patrick's stress, let's introduce the hyena weasel himself.

Mr. Patrick DeLuca. How you doing, man? Good, good. Thank you for that intro. I love the hyena. Hate the weasel. What, uh, tell us why you, before we, uh, started recording, you said today has been one of the most stressful days of your adult life. Tell us. Great. So I just want to point out that you lied when you said you were doing good. Go ahead. No, I'm doing much better now because I just made the decision when Forre said he was going to have a beer. I was like, yep, I'm not working out after this. I'm going to drink.

Fair here. Cheers to that. Cheers. No, nothing too serious to get into. Just nonstop shit. Just dealing with nonstop shit. It's just been one of those days. We all have them as adults.

All of our listeners most certainly can pinpoint a day where they're like, oh, my God. Another thing? Yep. Yep. Yeah. It's the same for you, Forrest. Galante, the third host. Wildlife International Superstar, Forrest Galante. What about you? You said you had a stressful day, too. Pretty much the same thing. It's just everything's compounding on top of itself. And as you know, Patrick, we are about three weeks away from Shark Week and a week into an edit. And it's very, very stressful to get it to a point where it's ready to go on television in time. What about the bodies that are being

put into wood chippers behind your house right now that we can hear. Yeah, so for all our listeners, I explain this to Patrick and Peter starting early. That drone humming that you're hearing is the wood chipper that is currently right outside of my office as we're having our trees trim today. And it, of course, it's been two days of them cutting. They haven't started the woodchipper once, which has been parked in my parking spot for two days. And literally 30 seconds before the podcast started, I just hear the thing of, and I'm like, oh, perfect timing. Of course they're going to run the wood chipper now. This episode's going to be great because you two are what I normally am, which is stressed

out and angry. And I am feeling, I'm on cloud nine, just worked out, feel great. Good, real quick, Peter. You said you're going on a vacation for the next couple days. Going up to the mountains. Who are you going with me? Your mom. Going with Doris DeLuca. Get into it. He doesn't want us to talk about his new thing. What are you talking about? I'm going with my companion. That could be my pet dog.

It could be another person. I'll leave it up to the listeners. Wow. You know what's going on right now, Patrick? I'm not nervous at all. What's that? He doesn't want to squash his chances of a gorgeous female listener falling hopelessly in love with him over the podcast.

So he's not willing to say out loud on the show whether or not he may have a current love interest. Yeah, I'm waiting for a female listener to fall in love with my silky, smooth, golden voice. That's why I started this whole thing. And the promise of meats and nacho cheeses. So before we get into the news here, Forrest, real quick, I just made up a game than I haven't told you guys about and I kind of want to play it real quick. So Forrest is sitting in his office, which is very cool. It's a converted garage that was built out into just like a fun. We recorded our first couple podcasts there pre-COVID. Yeah, you did.

And we will... Nice spot. We will get back to that someday. But behind him is just a series of really cool artifacts. So I just want to go rapid fire. Peter and I are going to take turns naming artifacts behind Forest, and you're just going to get into a quick story of where they're from. I'm going to start with the giant egg over your right shoulder.

That's his head. Dude, that's his head. You do have an egg-shaped head. I will. I do. And it's more centralized than over my right shoulder. That is an elephant bird egg, and that came from a market in Antanavarivo, Madagascar, on Patrick, our second trip together to Madagascar. And what's funny about that is, as you can see, the egg is in many pieces because as they're dug up out of the dirt, these giant fossilized eggs of the elephant bird, which is the largest known bird to ever exist, much, much greater than an ostrich.

as you can see next to the ostrich egg it's like the eggs 10 times bigger than an ostrich egg but it's all in pieces because that's how the shells are found so I actually soaked it in a bucket of water so that it fell back apart into the pieces so that I could layer all the pieces inside of a pot so that it could travel safely back to the United States but what I didn't do was anything smart

labeling the pieces and where they went so when I got home yeah it was like a three week paper machet project to get the egg back together and it was was the most, I hate puzzles, by the way. Absolutely hate them. My family loves them. Oh, they're just, they're the worst. They don't make any sense.

They're nonsense. They don't make any sense. Dude, I've flipped, I have flipped several tables over because of frustration over puzzles. Good, good. You do have anger issues. Start an anti-puzzle movement. But this was the most frustrating puzzle ever. But when I did finally get that last piece of the egg back together, I got the coolest

memorabilia ever, which is my elephant tree. Unbelievably cool. But real quick, what's cool about the elephant? You left out the key detail. People are picturing right now a robin egg. Oh, did I not mention the elephant bird was four times greater in size than an ostrich, the largest bird to ever walk the earth. It was an animal in modern times, an animal that was around when human being settled Madagascar

and was hunted to extinction. But just imagine a mega, super aggressive, thick trunk-legged elephant but I don't have to imagine. I'm looking at two of them right now. The egg is a similar shape and twice the size of like a rugby ball. It's massive. It's absolutely enormous. Yeah. No, it's, I think it's actually probably my most favorite keepsake on that back wall.

I love that elephant bird egg. I think it's so cool to have one sitting in my office. I'm super jealous because I was at the market with Forrest when he bought the elephant bird egg. And I bought just like a couple rocks. Right. I just some really cool, like, interesting jewel-like rocks. And so Forrest is smuggling this incredibly rare museum piece that he will cherish for the rest of his life. And I've just got like a couple rocks so I can give a souvenir to my girlfriend at the time.

So he just walks through security. And we've been warned by locals like get ready to get, you know, be fucked at the airport. Like they're real serious about this shit. So Forrest has his and his camping pot. He just walks through, smirks back at me. me because I still have to go through. And I've got my two dumb rocks that I spent the same amount of money on. They're all wrapped up.

And just my thing goes through. And the Malagasy guy is like, to share some like, yeah. He's like, come back here. Oh, man. And so he pulls me into this, it's not a back room. It's three curtains that are hung up. And it's the size of a phone booth. Him and two of his buddies come in with me.

Oh, my God. So we're all literally. Dick tip to dick tip, nose to nose. And they're all way taller than me. Yeah. Staring at me. Pulls out the one rock, he goes, what is this? I said, oh, it's just a gift.

It's a gift. Pulls out the other and goes, what is this? I go, oh, it's just a gift. He goes, ah, gift, gift, gift. Gift, gifts for us? And I was like, oh, yeah, yeah, of course. So there's three of them. So I pull out three 20s, three American 20s from my bag, and I hand them each to

20 thinking maybe that'll be enough. And they literally looked at each other as if they had like, you know, the best gift they'd ever gotten on Christmas. They were like, sir, thank you. Oh my God. Thank you so much. And we're like shaking my hand and like massaging my shoulder as we walked out. I could have gotten away for two bucks each.

Jesus. Easy. Easy. Yeah. So I fly then from Madagascar to South Africa back to New York. I check my rocks. They're fully intact. check my bag from New York to L.A.

Get back. Both rocks are smashed. That's right. It's the best story you've ever told on the air. All right. Peter, just let's do one more. Pick one more for us relics. Is that a hatchet up there up on the top?

What is that? A tomahawk? Oh, that's a very special one that you just picked there, Peter. When I was, oh, geez, 22, I went to Samoa and Tonga to play rugby for a while. and, you know, little white boy like me going to Samoa to get his ass handed to him playing rugby. I thought I was tough until I showed up in Samoa to play rugby. But, you know, I was there. It was kind of like a combo of playing some rugby and hanging out on the beach and living the Samoan life for a bit.

Anyway, after our third or fourth game of me just getting my shit pushed in, I had one of my very rare moments of brilliance where I made a big break and went and scored right down the middle of the field. and at the end of the game They threw a tomahawk at your head It's not a tomahawk You idiot I'm telling the story So why don't you not ruin my moment It's just not as good as Pat's so far

I know dude I was so into his story I was literally envisioning myself in Samoa And then you just fucking Sorry sorry okay so you're in Samoa Big big giant guys no shirts You're running around with big giant guys no shirts Correct so at the end of So I have my one moment of brilliance

Of my entire rugby tour in Samoa and I make a break through the middle, score a try, and at the end of the game, the mother of the captain, and keep in mind, this is like, like the mom was probably 6-4-240. You know what I mean? Just this huge Samoa lady. She, like, gives me this huge, like,

barrel-chested giant boob hug, you know, the kind where you, like, disappear inside of her cleavage. And I'm like, well, thank you so much. And then she goes, I have a gift for you for playing so well. And she gave me that thing that you're looking at, which is a Marlon Bill sword. which is a traditional Samoan warring item.

Oh, wow. That's super fucking cool. It's kind of annoying that he did something cool to earn it instead of just buying it at a trinket shop. So just describe what you're holding there. Hold it up a little bit for us? So yeah, so it's about what, three feet long. It is the bill from a marlin,

which has the bill from a marlin, which I assume has been fished or harpooned. And then on it is etching of, you can see some like turtles and some little Samoan tribal patterns and then it's got this wooden handle which is just kind of glued I'm not really sure what else on but it's a traditional Samoan warring tool from

you know pre guns and knives and yeah this is what she gave me for not being terrible for the first game of my entire Samoan rugby career oh that's cool I have I have two of those but whatever yeah but what's cool too is in American Samoa right they they fish sustainably they eat the Marlin and then they make weapons out of the bill. And you didn't have to kill the fish.

And you got the cool artifact. I didn't. And I got a cool knick-knack to remind myself that I'm not very good at the sport I love. Right. Hey, let me ask you this, because I've never actually talked to anyone who's been to Samoa. Is it like a actual spot where you'd recommend people like take a trip or go vacation? Is it cool? A lot of shit to see?

So I haven't been to, there's two Samoas, right? There's American Samoa and then there's Samoa. and I didn't go to American Samoa, which is supposedly like, you know, McDonald's and run down. Gotcha. You know, kind of like a hodgepodge of American culture in the South Pacific.

I went to regular Samoa, and it is one of my favorite places I've ever been. Really? So beautiful. It's like the best way to describe it is imagine Hawaii 200 years ago. Like Hawaii before they fucked everything up. Like there's no strip malls, there's no freeways, there's no, you know, all the mountains are wild.

There's these crazy waterfalls. You can just hike to anyone you like, swim in them. There's no gringoes running around, like drinking PBR. Yeah, yeah. It's just like, yeah, it's just like Hawaii without any of the mess. And I absolutely love Samoa. The diving was incredible. There's a place called Tau Sua Trench there, which you guys might have seen floating around

on Instagram at some point or another because it's one of those famous kind of pictures that everybody posts. and I thought that was incredible, this big trench in the ocean, like a hole in the ground. I got to say so since I've been in Ithaca here, Ithaca, New York, I went on a hike yesterday that I'd never been on in Ithaca. It's called Treman, Tremon Canyon. Okay. You are literally hiking up around and then back down. It's a loop around this gorge and series of waterfalls where, you know, at the top, you're literally just on top of the waterfall.

There's like pools in the waterfall and little offshoot waterfalls that you can swim around in and climb around. It is as good as any waterfall hike that I've done in like Lao or fucking Kauai. It's incredible, dude. I was like, if more people knew about this, this would be the biggest vacation spot for the northeast of America. It's incredible. I didn't realize it was, I mean, to be honest, and, you know, it's funny. I can talk about Towsua Trench in Samoa, but I know nothing about upstate New York. Like, I didn't even realize that there was good topography up there.

I thought it was just like the rest of the country were dead flat and there was nothing there until I started looking at your pictures. Yeah, for some reason, there's just, I guess, the way, and it is, it's mostly limestone here, right? So you've got all like the really dramatic limestone cliffs that you see in New Zealand and places like that. But, you know, you see in L.A., there's a lot of people that went to Ithaca College because they turned people out into editors and producers and stuff like that. You see the shirt, Ithaca is gorgeous. It's real stupid. It's a play on words. But the whole city is just a series of gorges and cliffs and waterfalls.

And it's really fucking cool. I literally, I was like, I don't get the play on words. I think it's pretty witty and smart. It doesn't make sense. So I did at the top of the fall look at this little plaque. Forrest, you know how I like to shit on scientists sometimes. Indeed. But there is this little plaque.

And so there's another fall called Teganic Falls, which is right near there, and we stopped by there. It's awesome. 215 foot waterfall. And there's a thing called the Teganic Man. And they were building a hotel, and when they were excavating it, they found a giant, a mummified giant under the ground, 12 feet tall. Damn. Huge head. Right?

Real weird. Now it starts making the rounds in the papers. People are reporting on it. There's pictures of it. They send the Teganic man to Cornell University, where I went esteemed Ivy League school. They verified this is a real giant. This is a real giant. We found it.

That's insane. And Cornell University, one of the most esteemed universities at the time, verified it. Only to be discovered a couple years later that this was no giant, the guy who claimed to have found it was a farmer who made it out of cow parts. No way. That's awesome. He took like three cows, combined their bones, shaved them down, did this really massive hoax. And at the time that it was debunked, it was touring around as a carnival side show and people were paying a dollar to see it. No way. That is hilarious. I love that Cornell verified it. I was trying to, I was, I was waiting for my opportunity to bash Cornell.

and then I realized you were you were making a self-deprecating joke the whole time. Yeah, no, it's pretty embarrassing. That's great, dude. Fucking scientists. Okay, so what have scientists discovered this week? Yeah, that is a good question. There is some good stuff in the news this week, which I'm stoked about. One of them is taking place right here in our own backyard in the United States.

And what I saw was the Ninth Circuit rules to restore principles. protections for Yellowstone Grizzlies. So don't ask me why, but part of our administration decided that trophy hunting for grizzly bears in Yellowstone National Park may be a good idea. And this was actually up for legislation to pass it, which was just bonkers, in my opinion. And it was very nice to see that it got turned down. But this has been on the table since 2017. So it's taken three years to decide whether or not grizzly bears should continue being hunted in, or not continue, but whether or not they should be opened up to being hunted in Yellowstone. And fortunately, that passed against it. Teddy Roosevelt was a lot of the national parks, I believe, well, he created the entire national

forest system. Correct. But he was an avid hunter. Avid, totally. And that's the thing is like, I think, you know, and this is sometimes an unpopular opinion, especially in the circles that I run in. But hunting is a fantastic management tool for wildlife. Like, think, you just summed, you just hit the nail on the head. Like, Teddy Roosevelt started the national park systems so that he could have, he could ensure the future of wildlife for people to hunt and utilize as a resource. Now, well, I don't personally agree with that as a good reason to do it. It is a, it is a reason to do it nonetheless. And it's something that has created massive amounts of conservation. And the same thing can be said in Africa, in India,

all kinds of places. Yeah, I mean, in India, the biggest national park, it might be a national forest. I'm not sure is Jim Corbett National Park. And it's a tiger preserve and a leopard preserve. It's the largest land area that is preserved in all of India, but it's named after Jim Corbett, who was a famous hunter. Which is interesting. He was known for hunting leopards. We have to do a whole separate podcast about that guy. Funny, that's a perfect intro to something else that I saw this week, which is there was a very famous tiger called Champawat. And Chambawat, and Chompawat was the deadliest tiger of all time. In her, and that's correct, it was a female.

Ten years on earth, she killed an eight 436 people, which was absolutely insane. That's a lot of fuckers. Yeah, imagine one animal killing 436 people before a hunting party killed her. Now, this was back in 1907. This wasn't recent. But I think the bit of news that came out that I thought was really interesting is she, was discovered to have been in perfect health, absolutely perfect at her time of killing,

with the exception of damage to her upper and lower rows of teeth on the right side of her mouth. How'd that happen? Well, here's what's interesting about that, right? Tigers don't choose to eat people, right? There have been a few instances in... Oh, by the way, and the reason I bring this up is she was shot by Jim Corbett, Patrick.

I mean, God damn it, Jim Corbett. So cool. But, you know, tigers generally don't... like choose to eat people. So I think what's so fascinating about this story is the injury that she sustained was most likely from a gunshot to to her mouth during her youth. And what basically scientists have speculated that due to her injury, this caused her to begin hunting smaller prey such as humans, right? So she no longer was taking on water buffalo and elephants. She was taking on meager, useless creatures like rabbits and human beings. I can't believe he said meager. Yeah.

It made Peter so happy. As soon as you said meager, he just started smiling. He loves that word. Is that one of your favorites, Peter? I mean, Pat, I've been calling Pat Meager for 12 years. Because he is. I mean, he's picture a guy who's five foot two. He's got the build of like a very small woman.

It looked like the rock. It is fascinating, though, that a human shot the tiger in the mouth. And then because of that, she now needed to start eating humans. and then trashed 436 people. It's kind of, isn't it? It's kind of like a commentary on like wildlife justice. You know what I mean? It is.

It's like you, you know, you decide to mess with the tiger and the tiger's going to mess back a lot harder. Well, you know, the ghosts in the darkness story when they were building the railroad. What country in Africa was that through? God damn it. Tanzania and Kenya. Yeah. And there were two lions that were praying on humans and ended up. killing, I think at least 80 or might have been over 100 railroad workers.

There's two railroad. But they were working in tandem, but they both, when they eventually killed them, they both had jaw injuries that they had sustained previously. And that's why they were hunting humans because they were like, ooh, I could go after that zebra, but that's going to be tough. Let me just eat a meager human. It's like driving through Taco Bell for them. That's exactly what it's like. So easy. Wow.

Throwing out the Taco Bell reference and the meager bomb. Wow, I am. How do we get them as a sponsor? Can we get them as a sponsor, God damn it? Yeah, that was funny. Next time I go, I'll ask the drive-thru worker. Okay, smart. What is their slogan, Peter?

What is Taco Bell's slogan? Dude, I actually had a debate with somebody about this years ago because I thought it was run for the border. I don't, I swear to God, I thought it was run for the border, across the border or something. But I think it's think outside the bun, or is that subway? I don't know, man. That used to be them, but that's old as shit.

dude. I'm watching commercials. I'm just going to the establishment. It's not like they say it to me as I'm fucking ordering. No, literally, they should. They should. They should absolutely. That's fourth meal. Think outside the bun. Okay. So Taco Bell's slogan currently is live moss, which Moss obviously is more for Spanish. So it's live more. That is taco. Yeah. I've never even heard that and I've eaten their 50 million times this year alone. So I'm wrong actually. That is their old slogan. I'm I'm looking this up as we speak. Their new slogan is indeed, think outside the bun.

Ah, there we go. There we go. Yep. You might be a animal expert. Can you say it? Jesus. What is going on? Can you fucking say it?

Jesus Christ. I just wanted to point out how Forrest might be an animal expert, but I am the Taco Bell expert, and I was correct on that. Thanks, Professor. Liv Moss. Liv Moss. Forrest, we were talking about this a couple days ago. I feel like I saw an update about the elephants in Botswana.

Yeah, so look, I'm going to present this in a format that we do sometimes because I would say this is a murder mystery. In fact, I'd say this is probably the biggest murder mystery that has taken place in the wildlife world in quite some time. And what this is is 356, that is a very big number, elephants have suddenly died in Botswana and the cause is completely unknown.

Now, this is absolutely bizarre. Let me set the stage for you. Those are some big animals. Those are fucking, that's a lot of mass to just die like that. It's crazy. So, yeah, let me set the stage for a minute. So Botswana is an incredible country.

It's one of the first countries in Africa to take out hunting completely. Right. So that means no more hunting. So there was a slight rise in poaching when that happened, but nonetheless, elephant populations have done really, really well there. In fact, there's around 135,000 elephants in Botswana today, which is a lot more than when there were 80,000, which is when there was still hunting going on a decade or so ago. So all of a sudden, these animals are healthy, they're happy, nobody's hunting them, there's no poaching. All of a sudden, you know, around 400 of them. drop dead. Now, straight away, you go, okay, one of a couple things has happened. The most likely one, we're talking about elephants, they've been poached for their ivory. Well, no,

they haven't, because all of these animals happen to still have their tusks intact. So no one would be hunting them for their ivory because, of course, they'd go and get their tusks. So what else could be going on? Well, as poaching being ruled out, perhaps these animals were poisoned, right? Maybe their bodies were poisoned because they were destroying crops,

something like that. But people have looked at their bodies very closely and poisoning always shows certain signs. Well, sure enough, poisoning has been ruled out. Now, it is currently the dry season in Botswana, which means that elephants have been pushed closer to people. So is this caused by people? Well, that still remains unknown. But another possibility, and I think this is by far the most interesting one, is that there is an anthrax outbreak. Now, the bacterial spore that's naturally found in the soil in Botswana, has actually caused elephant die-offs before.

due to anthrax, especially during a drought year, and keep in mind it is the dry season, when elephants choose to ingest a lot of soil, well, they don't choose, but elephants do ingest a lot of soil while they're grazing. And what that would mean is that buildup of that anthrax sport in that soil would get into their gut bacteria and ultimately there'd be an outbreak. But... Yeah, there's a big butt there. I saw that one. Yeah, but straight away, naturally, we said they're not poisoned and their tusks aren't cut off, so let's check for anthrax. Well, guess what? These tests,

also came back negative. There's absolutely no sign of anthrax poisoning in these elephants. So the elephant conservation community is literally stumped by these deaths. And I think what's going on right now and the bit of news that Patrick's talking about is samples from the dead animals were sent to my home nation of Zimbabwe, the much lesser nation of South Africa. So if you're listening, South Africans, you suck compared to Zimbabweans. And Canada as well. And Zimbabwe is the first of the three countries to come back with a set of results. And basically what they have said is, we know what's going on, but we're not willing to release our results until one or two of the other countries comes forward with the same results because we don't want to influence what they may

say. Wow. But all signs are currently pointing towards the possibility that there is a new pathogen that is killing these animals. And in a time and place in the world where there's a global pandemic that is affecting all of us, the big question is, what is this new pathogen? And is it possible to jump from species to species or even from wild species to human beings? Well, and it's interesting because it was floated like could earlier in the process, you know, could it be COVID related? Right. But in Botswana, there's been no instance of COVID at all. Right. So that hasn't even gotten into the people. So they, they, you know, highly doubt that that could have somehow gotten to the elephant population. Right. Right. That's fucking weird, man. And

truthfully, there's a lot of weird shit going on. Because right now in China, dude, there's a new strain of swine flu that's going around. I saw that. I saw that. There's a fucking squirrel in Colorado that died of bubonic plague. Really? I saw it. Yeah, a couple days ago the news came out that a squirrel tested positive for bubonic plague, which obviously, you know, caused the black death

in humans, the black plague. Right. What a shit show, man. Yeah, 2020's a nightmare, dude. But But that said, don't be scared of that squirrel, though, because that disease has actually been there. It's been endemic there for quite some time. And it's not a big deal. That's just like a one of those headlines to scare people. Thanks, Professor.

Just got my beer delivery. Nice. You know what I'm starting? So here's what I'm starting to do, guys. And I think you and our listeners should get on board. If something's just fucked up, just start saying it, oh, man, it's 20. You know, like not. Yeah, I think people are doing.

But not in reference to the year, not being like, oh man, it's the year 2020. Like, just giving the terminology for something being shitty, the words 2020. So like, oh, man, that's so 20-20. You know, that's so fucked up. Or you could even do like, ah, shoot, dude, like, I got to pull over to the rest stop. I know we just got back on the highway, but had Taco Bell last night, I need to take a 2020. I'm into it. I think this is a thing.

I think we got to just start pushing it out there. It'll turn into one of those, like, I got a case. I got a case of the Mondays. I got a case of the 2020s. Oh, that's worse. It's pretty poopy, but that's said, Peter, who probably poops the most of anyone here. Yeah, I mean, that's disgusting. Our fucking listeners don't want to hear about my fucking poop habits, you sick, meager little fuck. Sorry. So I sent you guys an article earlier, because, you know, look, you got boobonic plague, getting squirrels, you got elephants dying off, you got COVID running rampant in humans. and it's like, oh, the scientists will save us.

The scientists will save us. I sent you guys the article earlier. CNN is about now two months late to the game. They finally put out the report today that, you know, COVID is affecting people with different blood types differently. And this is old fucking news, but whatever. So basically people with type O are the least likely to have severe symptoms. They think people with type A are the most likely to have severe symptoms.

But that's not what I've found interesting or what. I want to talk about. Okay. You scroll down a paragraph or two, and then it gets into the fact that scientists have zero clue why we have blood types, what evolutionary advantage they offer, or why every species of primate have blood types. They don't know what the purpose is. Really?

There's not even a fuck. It's not for like genetic diversity. No. I mean, you know, it's really interesting, is that there's, you know, basically what they say is You know, we accept that it must have created some evolutionary advantage. They believe that the first, I don't know how they know this, but the first evidence that blood types began or became a thing was from one of our ancestors, a certain type of primate that existed 20 million years ago,

but they literally don't know why we have blood types or why other types of primates have them. That's weird. That is weird. We're like, oh, the scientists will come up with a vaccine for this. thing. It's like, well, they don't even know why we have blood types. Dude, you are such a pessimist. Come on. At least they figured out that there are blood types because that in and of itself is pretty, I mean, there's several different kinds. There's eight, but like, also by the way, not until 1907. So they used to do blood transfusions. Dude, if you're type A, right, and you get a

blood transfusion for someone who's B, it's likely to kill you. Right. Because your white blood cells will start attacking the new red blood cells cause clots and then you'll stop breathing and your heart will be clogged up, right? You're just like, yeah, let's hope this works. Until 1907, a blood transfusion was a last resort because it killed two-thirds of the patients that would get it. Yeah. That's not that long ago.

No. No. Come on, scientists. Yeah. Come on, forest. What the hell, forest? I'm the wildlife kind. I'm the animal fiddler.

I'm not the go into your body and fix it kind. Do you guys know your blood type? What's your blood type there, meager, meager Pat? It's funny because my brother, my oldest brother knows that he's one of the O-types, because he donates blood on the reg. And so I texted my mom and said, hey, do you know what my blood type is? And she responded a day later and said, I found Dominics and Joe's, because I have their baby books, but I have your baby book too, but I didn't write it down.

Oops. So she has no clue. And you don't know. I'm O-Neg. You don't know yours? No, I was, I was told the other day by a companion that it's weird that I don't know my blood type. And I was like, is that weird? I have no fucking idea.

So listeners, way in. Do you know your blood type? I want to, I want to poll of this because I think that it's normal to not know your blood type. But I guess if I got into a fucking life-threatening situation where I needed blood, I'd be fucked. But they can probably do a test that's like instant now, right? They can. But also, thanks, Peter, for making sure that all our listeners go on to iTunes and go, hey, I'm O-negative.

Hey, I'm A-positive. That's what we... All right. All right. Huh? I just said, all right. I was going with it. I was saying yes and to you.

All right. But it is at time for the thing that I get hit up about constantly every day. The Battle Royale, people love it. We love it. And today I have one for you. and I came up with this all on my own. No help from anybody. What a cretan.

What is it? You creep. So I have a dog. Me too. Forrest, do you have a dog? I'm a normal person. We all have dogs. We've all got dogs.

I don't know about you guys, but when I leave the house, I feel bad leaving my dog home alone with nothing to do and just complete silence. Because that's a nightmare. For me, I would go crazy. If you could select the three perfect movies to line up for your dog to watch while you leave for the night gallivanting around town at the whorehouses or whatever you're doing, which three movies would you put on for your pup? This is fun, Peter. That's good. It's nonsense, but it's fun. It's a great idea. Yeah. You're welcome. Why don't you take a stab at this first, Pat, since I see that look in your eyes.

And I want to give Forrest a chance to look this up on Google. No. What am I going to Google? What dogs to play for my movie? What the fuck did I just say? What movies to play for my dog? What dogs to play for my dog? You might want to go to the doctor.

Are we naming dog breeds or movies right now. All right. All right. Well, I will go first since I thought of the idea, you piece of shit. It's true. It was Pat's idea. They just made me read it. It's all recorded.

So I'm going to start with. with the best movie for any dog, especially my dog, being a puppy. You know, she's only seven months old. I don't want to expose her to, I'm not going to expose her to Marley and me, right? She's not, I don't want her to see death. Okay. Okay. I'm going to have her watch Milo and Otis.

It's just a classic, classic. Yep. A lost pug with its best friend cat. They are rafting down rivers or climbing mountains. It's an adventure film. That's going to entertain and do that. delight and she won't even notice that I've been gone for the first two hours. Okay.

I'm going to then follow that up with a film called Turner and Hooch. Okay. Now, we've got classic Tom Hanks. He's literally solving crimes with the help of his best friend, a giant, weird type of dog that's real droly. And what I like about this is it's going to, so my dog's going to see it and be like, oh, I'm not too, I do nothing. I literally bark, lick, and eat. That dog is literally solving crimes and taking down homicide suspects.

So I need to buck up my plans. And then I'm going to follow that up because now she's getting hungry, right? And she's like, if I don't come hard with entertainment, she's going to start to bark at the window waiting for me to come back. I'm going to go with the goonies. Wow. The goonies, huh? No dog involved

Just like probably my favorite movie Just a good Just a good film for your dog to take in It's like I just think everyone should see it You know Every every dog should see it Every every every every every I'm just

What does that have to do with your dog being hungry? Oh just because of the movie's so good That like she won't She'll forget that she's hungry Nice Nice Yeah All right who's going next

Who's gonna try and compete with my dog playlist I'll jump on there I'll go next. So here's my lineup. So this is a bad lineup. Good start. As I leave the house, the first film I will put on is Marmaduke. Because I want my dog to realize that it's okay to be a nightmare.

Because Marmaduke is a nightmare dog. The whole premise of Marmaduke is my dog does shitty things. my shitty dog died. It's like the Dennis the Menace of Dogs. Yeah, exactly, exactly. Yeah, the Marmaduke's a pricked. So I'm going to put on Marmaduke

so my dog can be like, oh, the fact that I'm a menace actually makes me adorable. And my dad still loves me even once I die. But then to lift his spirits after the handing of Marmaduke's kind of sad, I'm going to put on a movie about loyalty, Homeward Bound. Have you guys seen Homeward Bound? Good call. Yeah.

It's great. Great film. Yep, a couple dogs get left behind to the lakehouse, I believe, and have to make their way back to, what is it, like a Chicago Nights home or something like that? I can't recall. Jesus, I haven't watched it in a while. Yeah.

Sounds like you have. Yeah, it's been a minute. And they go on a whirlwind of adventures, and this will hopefully settle my dog down after watching Marmaduke, getting all revved up and probably destroying the sofa. Pretty stressful for, a dog to, you know, watch a couple of dogs get lost and trapped at a cabin

and then have to find their way home. I don't get the logic. All right. Next. Well, keep in mind that there's a happy ending because they find their way home. It's about loyalty to their owners. Smart. Smart. Smart lessons. Not smart.

Dogs don't have attention spans. They'll never make it to the end. Finally, contrary to Peter's negativity, I will put on a nice love story for my pooch. Little Lady in the Tramp. Ah, the spaghetti, the spaghetti scene? Mm-hmm, a little spaghetti scene, a little meatball slurping, some lips touching.

Wait, are you describing Peter's weekend coming up? I am, yeah, I am, yeah. Except with Taco Bell chalupas instead of spaghetti noodles. Pesquetti, as he would probably call it. Yep, it was melted cheese, yep, that's a good thing. Peter, how do you say the noodle with the red sauce on top? Piscetti? Huh?

Yeah. Yeah. That's the one. Piscetti? Is that what how it is? Is that what it is? That's what I thought. Pangell hair pasta.

All right, Peter. Go ahead. What's your list? It's going to be. Okay. Well, it's better than your, I mean, Forrest's literally, he just, like, typed in Google top ten dog movies. Peter, I know what yours is going to be. It's going to be Kujo, Pet Cemetery, and then hostile.

So you're going to try and scare your dog. I don't think you've met me, dude. I like to think outside of the box. The first movie. You like to make outside of the bun, actually. I like to think outside of the cage. the first movie that my dog will be enjoying thoroughly. Great movie.

I like it too. Snatch. I don't know if you guys have seen it, but Snatch has these, what are they called? Pikes, they're like gypsies. It's Brad Pitt. He plays this character that essentially speaks in a way that you can't understand it.

And I feel like that's how the dog hears things anyway, so he'll be comfortable with just the blathering that goes on in that movie. I mean, let's be real. the dog's not going to be following any of the story in any of these movies. So we're really going with audio and visual cues here that the dog will just pay attention to. That's it. Not like your guys, like you guys, the stories, you think the dog's going to pay attention until the end of the movie? Forrest, has he named a movie yet?

Snatch. No, it's just you haven't been paying attention. I've been watching you over there. You're on your phone all day. I have a meeting. I have to sign off. All right. Hey, hang, let me just give you a couple laughs, ready?

Sorry, go ahead. Are you fucking kidding me? God damn it. All right, let's go. So we got Snatch. So the second one, the second one is going to be Scooby-Doo. Just the TV show, the entire series of the TV show. So he'll, you know, whichever one he wants, it's a cartoon.

It entertains kids and other animals with small brains. So I figure it'll be good for a dog. And then finally, a dog's purpose. Because I feel that if he watches that, the movie. It's a Christian film. Huh? It's a Christian movie. Huh?

It's about reincarnation. I've never seen it. I just read this short description. Do Christians believe in reincarnation? You're going to subject your dog to a religious movie? I didn't know. It's called a dog. He's never seen.

I just read the description quickly. God damn it So you were the one actually Googling movies to add into this Of course I do everything And you're over there Googling movies I've known

I've known him a little bit longer than you have And one thing you can be sure of Is when he accuses you of something It's because he's done it So all the So all the horror house jokes are grounded in a Shred of truth Huh

The big head jokes It's a tall projection I do have to bail Sorry, guys. Do the sign off. I'll send you my link. All right. Sounds good. Get out of here. Listeners hate you. So do I. I'm sorry. I'm already late for this. Okay, bye. Bye. Love you. Bye.

All right. Might as well do the sign off, right, Peter? Yeah, let me give you a few laughs first. Sorry. That was... All right. Well, why don't you guys let us know which movies you would put on for your pup, whether it's my list of classics. Patrick's list that's kind of out there but has some goonies in it. Or Peters, which literally has nothing to do with animals. It has to do with reincarnation. And I don't even know what else.

Snatch, like, just because Brad Pitts in it. Scooby-Doo. Scooby-Roo! All right, all right, right. They're good. They're good choices. So, go into iTunes, leave us a review. Follow us on socials at the Wild Times.

We're on all the major channels. We're pretty cool. Peter manages it. If you want to talk to the professor himself, you got to just reach out on social media. And good night. good night live moss good night