Wild Times: Wildlife Education - Orcas Won't Stop Attacking Boats...Now What? - TWT 152

Episode Date: August 5, 2024

Enter the photo contest: https://forms.gle/YAzzKquv5P2yHbfWA We discuss more orca attacks on boats, a man biting a snake to death, and why koi fish are so expensive. Enjoy! Eight Sleep: Use code WILDTIMES to get $350 off Pod 4 Ultra. https://eightsleep.com/wildtimes Pretty Litter: Save 20% on your first order and get a free cat toy! https://prettylitter.com/wild Hello Fresh: Get one free kids' meal per box for two months while subscription is active. https://hellofresh.com/twtkids Visit https://www.colorado.com/ Win a trip to Animal Con: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/wildtimespod/subscribe https://www.patreon.com/wildtimespod More Wild Times: Instagram: http://instagram.com/wildtimespod TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@wildtimespodcast Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/wildtimespod/ X: https://x.com/wildtimespod Discord: https://discord.gg/ytzKBbC9Db Website: https://wildtimes.club/ Merch: https://thewildtimespodcast.com/merch Battle Royale Card Game: https://wildtimesmedia.thrivecart.com/battle-royale/ Our Favorite Products: https://www.amazon.com/shop/thewildtimespodcast Music/Jingles by: www.soundcloud.com/mimmkey 00:00 Start 00:38 - Peter's ticket 03:13 - Real Bros of Simi Valley 05:12 - Orcas Attacked Another Boat 20:19 - Man Bites Snake to Death 26:01 - Home Remodeling + Everything is Better the First Time 36:40 - Top 3 DFL 52:05 - Come see Forrest in Chicago 54:03 - Why Are Koi Fish so Expensive? This video may contain paid promotion. #ad #sponsored #forrestgalante #extinctoralive #podcast

All right. Ready? Yep. Wild Times. Oh, yeah, there it is. Oh, oh, oh, oh. Woo! That was, you, like, we got skinny Pete over there. This is the Wild Times podcast hosted by Skinny Pete. I still look fat. It's okay.

No, you've lost so much weight. I know, but I'm still fat. That's the thing. Well, you always have to be the fat guy on the pod. Exactly. I mean, I'll always be the fat guy in life. You better be. Welcome to the Wild Times. This is one of the best pods ever. We've got myself, the broologist for Scalante.

We got Skinny Pete on the far right. Hello. I'm changing your name to Skinny Pete now. That's great. And Papa P in the middle here. Yo. What's going on, guys? I got a ticket on the way here.

Yeah, you did a ticket. Yep. You were late. Let me just, I have anger problems. You don't say. You know, I've gotten over it for the majority. But once in a while, like, there'll be a day where I just like, like, I don't care if I crash my car. That's how angry I am.

Like, I want to run my car into the guy in front of me. So today, what happens is I'm going. going to fucking get on the on the highway the ramps closed now sure the the next ramp is like a whole fucking ordeal i have to go through a neighborhood to get to this thing so i'm fucking furious by the time i get on to the highway and i'm going like 90 miles an hour fucking cop motorcycle under a bridge i see him as i'm passing and then i do that thing like oh shit like a slow down like it doesn't matter too late and then you're just like in the car like just watching behind you coming up and he's like yeah gotcha you're like just imagining how fucking thrilled he is and just

how mad you are and you got the ticket no getting out of it no so the problem the big problem it took forever too because my fucking i had a license plate from my other car which i got at the same spot they're both leases they put the wrong plates on the wrong car so now he's like oh boy oh now you're going to jail he's reprimanding me that's definitely criminal activity yeah he's like he's like i'm letting you go but like you got to get this change because somebody who's not in a good mood might, like, actually make a thing out of this. Yeah.

To the car. And it took a really long time. He was, like, back there talking back and forth. So I'm, like, late and I'm mad. And I was just, like, call my wife. And I'm like, put me in a good mood because I'm going to be mad all day when we record. I'm sure that works. No, I'm good.

I'm good now. Well, he did bash in here with a cooler at 1015. And he, not just a little bottle of Tito's, a handle of Tito. Yeah, saw that. I figured we needed some ice and some booze, more hard liquor in here. There we go. All right. Well, we're doing it. That's great. I know you've already tuned out. Let's move on. I haven't tuned out. I just, I don't know, I don't know what to contribute to the fact that you got a speeding ticket.

No, it's okay. Here's a little tidbit. I've never gotten one. Ever? Never in my life. Wow. You better knock wood, sir. I'm just a safe driver. I go, you know, like five to seven miles over the speed limit. I thought you're going to say under the speed limit. And I was going to ridicule you. No. I did have another question. I saw your car out front. And every time I see your car out front. And every time I see your car. I start wondering about the size of your penis. It's very small. Right.

Because your car takes up two parking spots. The larger your tires, the smaller your penis. Yeah, fact. Speaking of, Patrick texted us both two nights ago. Have you seen the real bros of Seamy Valley on Roku? I put it on and watched the whole thing. Did you watch? You finished it?

I finished it. It's just fun. It's so stupid. It's so stupid. Yeah. Oh my God. This is it. This has been a YouTube web series for like 10 years.

They put out like one or two episodes a year. Oh, really? That's what it is? Yeah. Oh, I didn't realize that. The movie is way funny. I've tried to watch the episodes. It's like funny.

I'll watch them. But the movie, I watched the trailer and I was like, this is like good, dumb comedy. Dude, I, the name, when he said the baseball bro's name, Jath U.S., I laugh for like two minutes. Jathieu is way sicker than us now. Jaffew. I don't know what about the name Jaffew just made me laugh. But it made me laugh for like two minutes.

It's hilarious. I love the line where he's like, We just all realized that we're not even close to living the lives that look sick online. I got to watch the whole movie, man. It's pretty good. I mean, I live in Seamy Valley. Guys, did you know that we just put our bonus episodes on Apple subscriptions? So now you can subscribe on Apple, get yourself six ad free pods.

So you're saying, I listen to my podcasts on Apple Podcasts. That's right. So now I can hear the bonus, the four extra podcasts a month. Add free as well, including these two. Oh, wait a minute. That's the Cinemax of Podcasts. There's definitely some stuff in there that shouldn't be publicly available. And reminder, if you're signed up to any of our premium stuff,

we're giving a trip to AnimalCon away. That's in October. You're going to come. Someone's going to come with us, flight. Boo. Well, no, not the booze. But the tickets to the Animal Con is paid for. I mean, I will say last year at AnimalCon, we just ended up buying booze for everyone

who came to hang out. Yes. So I spent like a thousand dollars. It was really fun. It was really fun. All right, Kyle, hit the button. the news. News from the underground.

So Forrest, I'm going to let you tell the story. Okay. But I saw this and I have a theory. All right. Because we've talked about the orcas that are attacking boats. We have. We've talked about it a few times. We have.

And whether it's play or it's aggression or blah, blah, blah. And your theory and I think a lot of people's theory, marine biologists, whatever, was that they're playing and they think it's fun. They're having fun. They're mischievous teenagers having a good time. But I think this is up the end. Okay. Well, seeing as a group of killer whales just sank $128,000 yacht, here's the thing, though, in two hours. They spent two hours turning this boat apart. Yeah, sadistic. That's not like before they've grabbed a rudder and gone away and been like, ha ha! This time, they literally spent two hours attacking this yacht in the Mediterranean until it actually physically sunk.

Yeah, they wanted to see it sink. Yeah, they did. Do you think they got joy out of watching all the human beings freak out the whole time? Oh, I'm sure. I imagine it was a blast. I think these are mischievous orcas doing funny things that they think is funny. Funny. Yeah. They're like a bully. Not according to Mr. Powell.

Doesn't say his first name here, but he was the ship's owner. They had just disembarked for a 10-day sale. They're going to sail. It's his birthday bash. Yep. Okay. So he's celebrating his 60th birthday. They decide to leave the port of Portugal.

They're going to sail to greet. That sounds fun. Lovely. Really nice place to be in the med. I might think there were some cocktails that were going to be served. I would imagine so. So 22 hours into the trip, he feels something smack the bottom of the boat and he thinks they hit a rock. Yep.

And so he's looking around trying to see if the, you know, the ship's, the boat's damaged. And then boom, another hit. Wow. And then as he describes, they methodically attacked the rudder and just smashed into the boat. and just tore this thing to shreds piece by piece for two full hours. He's quoted here in the article saying

they knew the weak points of the boat. Which I totally believe. I believe they looked at it and went here's something we can grab onto and pull it apart. Sure. Yeah. I mean, they've done their reconnaissance

and now they are on the offense after all these years. Dude, I think it's insane. I think it's crazy that we live in a time where orcas are fighting back. Yeah. Yeah, dude.

So, but picture yourself on this boat. Yeah, man. Apparently, there's no life raft or they didn't feel confident enough to get into a tiny boat. Would you get into a tiny inflatable boat? So that's what I was going to ask you. No, God, no. So if we're there, we're filming for your YouTube channel. Yep.

And this pot of orcas, what's a typical pod size? What would you say? Let's say eight. Okay. Oh, man. So we got eight orcas really ripping the ship to shreds. and it's starting to wobble. It's not looking good.

I would obviously be like, what should we do to you? What would you say? I would get the inflatable raft ready, have it on deck and be as ready as you can so that the very last thing you do as the yacht sinks is get into that. It's a last ditch effort.

But you should stay on the largest piece of land as long as, or largest thing as long as possible. But I'll say this. I doubt those orcas had any intent on hurting the people. Not that it wouldn't still be fucking terrifying, right? You'd be like, what the fuck is happening? Why is my boat getting shredded by whales? Yeah. But I'm sure they had no interest in actually killing or eating the people. They were just having fun tearing apart the

boat. Yeah. They probably could have swum away and the orcas probably would have left them alone, probably being the key word here. So who knows? But yeah, I would say you wait as long as possible and as the ship starts to sink to where it's like, oh no, it's actually going under. You hop into the life raft and then hope. so they're you know they're trying everything they're lighting firecrackers i don't know why they had them party boat lighting fire crackers to try to deter the the orcas um they had radioed they radioed for help right away yeah took two hours two hours later a spanish vessel shows up and gets the people off the boat three minutes before it goes under that's what it was it was three minutes

Three minutes later, the boat sinks. Yeah, this is a movie. I mean, this is going to be a movie. Imagine if one guy from the Spanish rescue was like, I'm going to stop for coffee. Sounds like they might. Or maybe they did. Yeah.

Well, so this is now, these pods are autonomous of one another, right, that are attacking these ships. So they're somehow communicating this across the entire species. Well, they're pelagic and transient and they'll run into each other and communicate and talk. We've talked about that before. Right.

No, I think it's absolutely insane. and it's yeah, I think they're having fun. I think the orcas probably find it very humorous. It would be terrifying to be in that situation. I cannot imagine sitting there and being like, wait a minute, my boat is actually getting shredded right now. No. And there's nothing I can do. Well, and like you're probably a little tipsy.

You know, you're not on your game. It's the middle of the evening. I think I've said this before from diving with orcas, which I've done a couple times now in the Sea of Cortez. it's the only animal I've ever been around where I feel like I have zero control. Oh, yeah. Zero. Like crocodiles, you're in the water,

you know, like you're looking at them. Lions, it's like, okay, I see them over here. Like, I have some control with my body language. With orcas, and I've never felt this way with a single other animal, not even with elephants, nothing. Zero control. You're in the water. There's nothing you can do with body language.

Like tiger shark, you swim in a big shark, It's like, whoa, this thing's kind of aggressive. I don't want to bite it, you know, or like, I'm going to turn my body or whatever. And I could go on and on about different animals and their behavior. But with orcas, you're literally just like this bobbing inanimate object. And it's like, nothing I can do will affect it. If I want to punch it, if I want to swim it, if I want to stab it, nothing.

If it wants to kill me, it's going to kill me. If it wants to ignore me, it's going to ignore me. It just comes right up under you with its nose and goes, psh. There's just nothing that you just, like I said, I've just never been around an animal where I feel like nothing I do would alter its behavior at all. Whatever it decided is what it was going to do. Yeah. So apparently there's, you know, part of what they're doing is tearing at the rudder and biting and stuff like that.

Yeah. But also just repeatedly slamming the boat. Yeah. So what are they doing? Are they slamming it with their tail or are they slamming it with their head? No, I'm sure with their nose and head, which is how they hit stingrays and things like that. And I, you know, you can easily punch a hole in a fiberglass haul. Sure.

That's not hard to do. Yeah. I mean, you could do that with basically anything. You as a human could probably punch through a fiberglass hole if you tried hard enough. Not very seaworthy. No, well, they are, but that's just how it works. But yeah, no, I think they're probably hitting it with their heads. You know, these animals have the dexterity to kill a small shark and remove its liver with its mouth without injuring.

It's like surgical the way they can open up a shark and take the liver. I didn't know that. That's like bananas. And how big is a one of these killer whales? You're talking like tons and tons, right? Oh, yeah, they're huge. You're 25 feet long, whatever. I don't know.

Bananas, dude. And can do surgical precision, get out the liver of a shark. Can literally like cut open the organs, the stomach of a shark and take the liver out. I bet they give a good BJ. So this is happening more and more. We're hearing this story, like, almost like what? Once a week, once every, at least every time we podcast. Yeah, like at least once a month, I'd say.

and it's becoming global. Is this the first account of this happening in the med? I know, I think they're all in the med. No, before it was, where was it? It was in the Middle East. In the Middle East, yeah, that's right. That's what I was saying. They're communicating across the globe here now.

It's spreading. Kyle, I think there says something in this article about New Hampshire. I saw New Hampshire. That's what I was frantically trying to. I was referring to the whale breaching. Oh, okay. But so the owner of this yacht had an interesting quote, where he was like, I think people are going to start bringing guns out on their boats to shoot these whales.

Well, that's not good. Exactly. Like, could we get to a point where now we're having conflicts, armed conflicts? A fucking whale war, bro. I mean, this is a conflict, right? It's like the whales are starting it. But obviously, if we want to eradicate orcas, we have the means to do that. So it's not good.

You would need like a big, like a giant caliber gun to be able to do anything. to one of these whales. I mean, you would, but I'm sure if you shot an orca with a 22, it would be like, okay, this isn't fun anymore. You know what I mean? I don't think it would stick around, but I'm not suggesting anybody do that. I imagine, no, I don't think it would feel that. No, in the blubber, no, I wouldn't feel that. But I don't know if there's, like, whales are incredibly, what I would think the resolution would be is orcas and whales in general are incredibly sensitive to sound and vibrations. And there are like acoustic deterrence. In fact, there's a new shark one out that apparently doesn't do anything.

They're going to sue me for saying that. You didn't say the name. Yeah, it's some audio. I was going to pull it up in about five seconds. It's what you heard. It's not shark bands. Those guys are in Santa Barbara, actually. But it's, yeah, this, this. Anyway, my point being, I think that you could easily craft some incredibly loud, awful underwater sound deterrence. Yeah. That would turn orcas and whales away pretty quickly. We're going to see you on on Fox or CNN. talking about this with that exact solution in three or four months. I'm putting it out there right now. Probably less. But no, because you, yeah, you know, one of the reasons we have all these beachings of whales and things like that is it's driving them insane from the noise pollution. Yeah. If you make a big super loud audio deterrent that the orcas just kind of stand. Yeah.

And it doesn't need to be a big thing. You know, it could be packed inside a little Pelican case type thing and you just throw the... You just dangle it while you're sailing. Dangle it over and you see one or whatever and flip it on and it makes these awful repetitive sounds and they go away. It's good, though, because that's a non-violent, more conservation-focused way of doing it. You could tune these things to not actually, like, hurt them, but to deter just the whales to go away without actually hurting them. Well, it would hurt them in the sense of if they came too close. It would hurt their ears and, you know, the frequency.

But as long as they swam away from the direction of the sound, it would go away. So I think that would work. I think that's a lot... It's a hell of a lot better than taking a gun. By the way, if you're taking a gun and shooting an orca, it's too late. Right. That means the things already hit your boat. Right.

It means you're in conflict with it. Whereas if you, I don't know if somebody, I wouldn't be surprised if somebody's already trying to manufacture this. But if you had this audio deterrent, you could even have it on a switch on your boat where you just flip it on every time you see them or, you know, you leave it on while you're sailing, which I wouldn't like that because then you'd be constantly making noise pollution. But, you know, just something like that that could do the trick. Yeah. I mean, dude. This might be a big, big. business venture for someone. This is a brand new phenomenon like just over this past year.

But it is interesting that, so according to the people on board, they, it was 15 hits to the rudder. That's a lot. Before they could, they lost all ability to steer the boat. Yeah. So they hit the rudder first 15 times. Yeah. And then they started dismantling the rest of the boat. Well, that means they needed to stop the boat, right?

That's why they're hitting the rudder. I mean, the rudder steers, it doesn't power it, but they're trying to stop it so that they can fuck around with it. That's so fucked up, man. But they understand that. Don't think they don't. But that's also, they're incredibly intelligent organisms. That's no different from being like, all right, I'm going to bite the tail off this Mako first so that it can't swim. And then I'm going to mess with it.

Then I'm going to eat it. Like, they get it. Like, they know what they're doing. For sure, for sure. Oh, man. I'm terrified. I won't be on a boat anytime soon. But I mean, this, you know, it's like the equivalent of like, because this is fairly new, or at least this being reported.

This behavior is definitely new. It would be like if it just came out that. like in Alaska, brown bears just are now just targeting motorcycles. Yeah, exactly. Or like, yeah. Totally. Any, any yellow car.

Yep, that'd be terrible. We don't know exactly why, but bears are coming out of the woods and attacking yellow cars. Oh man, that would be crazy. So I got another piece of news. Hang on. Yeah. Did you hear Peter's bullshit response there? Man, that'd be crazy. It's because he's looking at his phone.

I want to talk about something later. So I'm preparing myself. Okay. Okay. I got another piece of news. It's been 105 every day. It's hot out here. My bedroom was an add-on to the house. The AC doesn't get back there. Are you sleep?

Well, I got a sleep pod. I literally got a sleep pod. Of course. To cool my bed down. Yeah. I got the Pod 4 Ultra from 8 sleep. Yep. It's changed my life.

I cool my half of the bed down to 20 degrees below the temperature of the room. No more kicking the blankets off in the night. I'm nicer to my children in the morning. If my wife starts snoring a little bit, it detects it and tilts her head up and she stops. Dude, I set mine up. It took like 20 minutes. I didn't get out of bed for like three hours because I cooled it down by like 10 degrees.

So just laying there. And then I realized it starts tracking your body, like how you sleep, your heart rate, all these things that I normally try to do with this thing. And I don't have to wear it anymore. It's great. I can tell that I'm getting at. at least one hour more of quality sleep every night, which is huge because I don't sleep that much. So it makes a huge difference.

If you want to try yours, head to 8Sleep.com slash wild times and use code wild times to get $350 off the Pod 4 Ultra. You're not going to regret it. They currently ship to the United States, Canada, UK, Europe, and Australia. Dude, 350 off. That's a hell of a deal. Dude, also when it's hot out, man, you know what stinks? The kitty litter room, bro.

It's disgusting. But ever since I've gotten Pretty litter, no more smells. My nostrils are free. Just no more hot, smelly, disgusting cat poop up my nose, man. I love my pretty litter. Something about their magical formula.

I cleaned the catpox last night. I don't understand how there's zero scent. I've never seen you so excited about it. I swear to God, like, I know this isn't good for the ad. If I have to hear Patrick talk about Pretty litter one more time, I'm going to lose it. He texts me twice a week about a lot. is a fucking cat litter box.

I texted my handyman. And he was like, what? Okay, I'll try it because he has a bunch of cats. No, it's nice because, dude, you don't even have to, it automatically ships every month too. So it's just, it's boom right there. It's fantastic. They also have, uh, there's a color changing indicator of potential illnesses in the cat,

like urinary tract infections. Pretty litter is amazing. You have to try it. Go to pretty litter.com slash wild to save 20% on your first order and get a free cat toy. That's pretty litter.com slash wild. Save 20% on your first order and get a free cat toy. Pretty litter.com slash wild terms and conditions apply C-Sight for detail. And another piece of news.

I saw the headline. Don't know the story. Not the first time I've seen a headline like this, but it always, it always flabbergast me. Man bites snake to death after it attacked him. Yeah. What do you mean? Yeah. Why not?

What do you mean? Yeah. Yeah. Like that's something that. just happens. Well, no, I'm just saying, like, you know, that the adrenaline's pumping. It bites you. I mean, dude, I, like, an inexperienced person like me might do something like that. No. I don't have any control. If a snake bites you, you, you, no, that's insane. If a snake bites you, you, okay, sure, you kill the snake. There's a thousand ways better to kill it than bite it, you know. Okay. Yeah. So this, this was in Bahar, India. Yeah. gets bit by a cobra, I believe.

Yeah, cobra. Yeah. So apparently there's a local superstition that if you bite the snake back, that it can neutralize the venom. Oh. I like that the story that was posted said he retaliated. But he, I think you probably, when you live there, you know that if you get bit by a cobra, you're probably dead. Yeah. And he's like, the thing I've heard is that if I bite it back, last ditch effort type thing.

I still think it's insane. Well, it is. I mean, but, you know, like, do we know, do the guy die? Like, did it? No. Did the guy die? He didn't. It probably wasn't a cobra then.

He was discharged from the hospital the next day. Yeah, so it was probably like a harmless little house snake that came wiggling up to him and accidentally, like, slither over his shoe. By the way, you don't think. And then he bit its head off. No, oh, sorry, it was a Russell's Viper. Oh, that's pretty gnarly. Yeah? I've caught Russell's vipers.

It actually says here that it's unknown, which snake it was, but it's, you know, it was. it's likely that it might have been a Russell's Viper because that accounts for over 40% of the bites. So he didn't actually kill the snake. He sure did. Oh, he did. So they do know it for fact. It sounds like it hasn't been reported. Gotcha. Okay.

But they would know if he took the snake in. Yeah. So if you do get bitten by a snake and you retaliate by biting it and killing it, you should take the snake with you to the hospital, right? That they know what... If you are bitten by a snake, this is actually good advice for anybody.

If you're bitten by a snake and you are unsure of what the species is, you should kill the snake and take it to the hospital. I mean, take a photo if you can. If you're calm enough, that's better than killing it. But if you, it's same with a spider, by the way. If you're bitten by one of these things, because they all have different cocktails of venom, take it with you so that they can then analyze what the animal is and treat you accordingly. So from 2000 to 2019, that's a 20 year period. 1.2 million snake bite deaths in India. So about 60,000 a year. The highest snake bite death place in the world, I believe.

Is it higher than Vietnam? I think so. Maybe you can look that up, Kyle. But it's, I know in India, yeah, for whatever reason, the India, so there's a couple places where snake bites are really, really high. One is in tea plantations, which there's tea plantations in India, there's tea plantations in southern Africa, there's tea plantations in Vietnam. And the reason being like small rodents and birds and things like young tea leaves. Okay. And then, then it's all this monoculture and the snakes come in to eat the pests. And you're walking through, you can't see the ground. Yeah.

Because tea leaves like grow over each other and you walk through these rows trying to pick your tea leaves and you kind of see the ground. You step on a snake. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, you're right. India says is reported to be the most affected by snake bite deaths. You don't, you don't think of India as like one of these places like Africa or something with all these crazy animals.

But there's another story in India. just recently where a guy killed a leopard with his bare hands that was attacking his wife and daughter. Is that in India? That was in India. Interesting. And it came. Yeah, dude. Look at this.

A little guy. Yeah, but still, I mean, terrifying, bro. I can't believe that that leopard would keep attacking that guy with the size of the leopard being so small. Once they're engaged, they're not going to back down. That's not really how it works with big stuff. So it's really fighting for its life at that point. So it's one thing when a predator tries to take on prey and the prey kicks it off or whatever, it might come back again. But if the predator gets injured, it's typically going to retreat and leave it alone.

The most successful predators in the world outside of like dragonflies and some pretty oddball examples only have like a 30% success rate of trying to actually kill the thing they're trying to kill. That's like the highest in the world is a 30% success rate. So that means 70% of the time, they're going to. giving up, they're fended off, whatever. Yeah. When an animal is cornered like this leopard fighting this guy, and I don't know the situation. I mean, maybe we should read about it. But when that

happens, it goes into that fight or flight response. And once it's in fight response, it's not going to back down. At that point, it's going to fight all the way to the end. It's like when my cat connects onto my ankle and just won't let go. I don't know. Does your cat do that?

All cats do. They just grab your foot, bite it, then keep biting it. That sounds awful. Yeah, mine's never done that. 14 years. Really? Yeah. No, it's, it's, what about your hand or your arm or your wrist?

You've never, like, touched its belly? I do that for fun, but she, like, pulls her, pulls her punches with those back claws. My wife's still on the hairless cat thing. Oh, that's terrible. What's the status? Oh, we're remodeling a house right now. She can't bring up anything. Okay.

Yeah. She literally sent me this text a few. That's what I stepped outside for before a thing. The text goes, she's going to hate me for saying this. I'm struggling with this more than I thought I would, referring to the remodel. Usually you're the one that's so upset about everything changing, but this time it's me. So what is what is that referring to? Oh, we're just like, dismantling our entire.

Right now our house is missing half of a roof. There's a wall gone. Our deck's gone. So you know what, like, you guys know what my house looks like. You step out the back deck. The back deck's gone. So it's just like a cliff basically where the garden is. So the kids are super unsafe.

Like we kind of have a door open. You know, blah, blah, blah. I don't care. I've given up. I've given up caring. You're just like one of them's going to fall off this cliff. No, I care about that. Take the door shut. No, we lock the doors or whatever. But Jessica's like, oh my God, should we have thick railings or thin railings on the new deck? Should the wall be here, south facing or here, north facing? And I'm like, here. Just pick. I don't, I don't care. I don't care. If you're happy, I'm good. And she's, she's now upset. This is a woman. She's upset that you're not

upset. That's it. She's upset that I'm not upset. She wants to see you flustered. Yeah. She wants me. She wants me. She wants me. She wants. She wants me. She wants me to be like, why are we, because that's, that's old me. She wants you to take some of the flustering from her. Old forest is like, don't change anything. Everything is always perfect the first time. That is, that is my mentality across everything. Yeah.

Like the second you set up a piece of furniture, you'd never, ever move ever again. Sure. Ever. And Jessica's like, I've been bored for five minutes. Let's move the, it's rearrange the living room. But now I'm not flustered by the house being changed. I don't care. I don't care.

So she said that you, you're normally the one who gets flustered and upset when things change. Yes. So this has happened before where what, like you were gone, came back, she'd moved the couch and you just lost your mind. Yeah, literally every single vacation. I swear to God, I'll come back, the couch is a new color, the TV's on a separate wall. Like, whatever, it makes no fucking sense. I'm like, why are we playing musical furniture every time I leave the house? No, so, so this is a big thing with, with me and my wife, and even in business and like, as a producer, right? It's like, if you start to go down the wormhole of the fomo of not making the right choice, you'll never get anything done. Even just buying a pair of fucking board shorts.

Sure. Right? Well, maybe I should check this company, this company, this company, and you're looking right. You need a pair of shorts. The first one you see that looks cool, buy it and never think about the other choices. Move on immediately. And the same goes for house stuff. It's like, what do we need? Okay, we need a chair? I like that. chair? Done. Oh, it's comfortable. That's it. Done. We're not going to three more furniture stores. That's the chair. And to add to that, never replace that chair. That's it. Once you bought that chair, move on. Move on in life. I got a question though, Pat. So what about like the garage? What if you want to do something in the garage to like change it around? Do you ever get like the

desire, the urge to do that? Because I do. What I get the desire to do, when I moved in, I set up the garage how I wanted it. Yeah. It is then since become the place where things get stacked. Not by me. It's true. It's true. The constant battle is just to keep, here's the other thing. Someone who I live with

removes a tool from the tool shelf. Oh, I want to whom. It gets put in a different place. So it's just a battle to maintain order of my original setup. Yeah. That's all it is. You're right. I was just thinking like the converse of that because I'm always wanting to kind of move things and put more of my stuff in the garage. And I'm realizing it's because that, it's just because

The stuff that wasn't there is now there, and I have to keep rearranging it and moving it. Yeah, you're just collecting shit. It's exhausting. It's utterly exhausting. Life is terrible, dude. It's so bad. So when we bought our house, the backyard's just a big grass pit. Yeah, I remember.

Which is the gophers have won. And they've gotten to know that. Like they are so bold. They don't give a shit. I brought my cat out because there was gophers that were just out. just cruising around and not scared of me oh wow um so my cat i bring the cat out and they're like fucking with the cat wow so it is i mean there's i i they like whatever's going on there but anyway so we're redoing the whole thing we're putting turf in use less water we're building a pool yeah

building a patio there's a million decisions that need to be yeah what tile lines the top of the pool what do we do here what do we do here and it's like if left to her own devices, my wife would, this project will take 10 years. It'll never be resolved ever. No decisions will be made. That's a cool tile. Yeah, yeah, good. Okay, that. Like, I can get it done in one day. Yep. Because you just pick something that looks cool. You're good. And it's good. Well, yeah. So the gophers were teaming up, kind of like, and razze in your cat? There was one, I took a video of it. There's one particular gopher that the cat was just perched above the hole.

Yeah. And the gopher would just pop its head out. She'd swine. wipe at it and this went on for 45 minutes. Literal whackamol. Actual wackamol. That's hilarious. There's a squirrel in my garden that does the same thing to our dog, Hoover. He just haunts our dog. So that big oak tree out of our back deck there,

what used to be our back deck. He just, every afternoon, sometime between like three and five, he just appears and starts like, Chit, Chich, Chich, Chooch, Chooch, and Hoover, like, Hoover will be fast asleep on the couch. And he, like, runs outside. And the squirrel, it's so funny, because Hoover will go running outside to

where the oak tree is and the squirrel will be and he'll, the squirrel will come all the way down to where he's like four or five feet above Hoover's head. And Hoover will just go ape shit. And the squirrel like run through the trees like up and down just taunting him until he gets bored and then I go home. When I first moved into my house, we, what just collapsed? Something fell in the studio.

What happened? Just the remote. Okay. When we first moved, bought our house, we drove past it. And every time we drove past it, there's this. this beautiful, pure white cat sitting right on the steps in the front of the front door. Like he was the owner of the house before we moved in there. And when we got there and moved in, now this cat, his name is blue.

He's deaf. He's the neighbor's cat I've realized and found out. But like now comes up to the window where my cat, Sammy, will be sitting and just like, like, stares at him like he's the bully. And then just like they get into these wild ass like, through the window. Through the window, dude. That's good fun.

You should film that. He should start a YouTube channel. Dude, he is such a bully, man. If my cat gets out, like Sammy's going to be waiting for him outside and just beat the shit out of him. Well, yeah, especially because he's an outdoor cat. Oh, absolutely. He, like, runs the town. He'll destroy your cat.

So what brought about this idea of tearing your whole house apart and being doing it? The wife? Of course, yeah. I have been adamantly pushing for us to buy. a new house and move and get more space adamantly. The problem is, as you guys know, I'm gone 250-ish days a year. And so Jessica doesn't want to. We have small kids and my mom's like literally right up the hill.

She doesn't want to move. And so she's like, all right, my criteria, I'm the one who wants to move and have more space. And Jessica doesn't want to leave. And so her criteria is, okay, you have to do something in this neighborhood, which is impossible. Yeah. It's ridiculous. There's nothing for sale. There's nothing available.

Yeah, it's utterly preposterous. So we got into a nice big fight. I marched up the hill, knocked on the neighbor's door, and offered him money for his house, and he laughed at me and told me to go home. And then she came in the door and the next day, she's like, great, well, then we're going to do the remodel. So now she's, you know, like, in all fairness,

were you actually advocating to, like, do another state? No. Okay. That ship sailed long ago. So you would try and find a place, maybe not in your area, but in Santa Barbara? There's a ton of beautiful homes in Santa Barbara available within our budget. Nice.

You know, they're not like great forever homes. You're not going to be super proud of them showing them off to all your friends, but they're nice homes. They're doable. You'd have more space. Yeah, but Jessica just won't do it because she doesn't want to manage a big house by herself with two little kids far away from help. I kind of can't blame her. With me gone most of the time.

So, I mean, she won the argument fair and square. Yeah. Not debating it, but, uh... Yeah. And your house is going to look nice and you're going to enjoy it. Totally. And that's why I don't care. Exactly.

But I'm not stressed. I'm like, do whatever you like. Should we play a game? Yes. Let's play a game. Let's do it. What do you got? So last week, Jessica went up to her parents place for two days.

Remember I was texting you guys that? Yeah. Dude, I didn't know what to do because I don't really cook. I grill fish. Well, you definitely don't grocery shopping. I certainly don't do that. So I ordered Hello Fresh. Oh, yeah.

Best part about this, right? So the meals show up to your door. with all the ingredients pre-prepared, with a super easy to follow less than 20 minutes, and you make these amazing meals. The best part of my month, maybe my year, is when Jess came home and Rhodes ran up to her.

She went, hi, mommy, hi, mommy. And she goes, how are you doing, blah, blah, blah. And then she starts talking about you. She goes, have you been eating well? And Rhodes goes, Daddy's a better cook than you. I was like, send it. And she doesn't even know. I threw all the hello fresh stuff in the trash,

like the packaging. She didn't even see it. So she actually thinks I made all these elaborate meals without, Oh, yeah. They got like 50 different recipes to choose from every week. It makes it easy to always find something for the whole family, kids, wife, love it. Some of them have six portions in them. Yeah.

And for a limited time, kids eat free. Go to hellofresh.com slash TWTK kids to unlock this exclusive offer. One free kids meal per box for two months while a subscription is active. That's free kids meals just by going to hellofresh.com slash TWTK. kids. America's number one meal kid. We hope this episode inspires you to seek an exciting trip of your own the summer, perhaps one that immerses you in the wonders of Colorado. From culinary delights and outdoor adventures to unforgettable entertainment in scenic outdoor venues, do it all in the state that has it all. Experience the thrill of mountain biking alongside riverside trails

or hop aboard a train for a railroad adventure filled with awe-inspiring scenery, explore the state's charming cities and towns, staying in historic hotels or at a dude ranch surrounded by pristine nature. Enjoy Michelin star dining and farm-to-table experiences and relax in serene hot springs under a sky filled with stars. Let Colorado awaken your spirit of adventure and explore all the possibilities that the state has to offer. Visit Colorado.com to uncover the magic and start planning your getaway today. Top three DFL. Press the button. This one's fun. Dead fucking lots.

Okay. Thank you. I think our brosters are going to like this. All right. What do I know about them? You built this. I did. I came up with this one.

Yeah. All right. Also, just real quick, I'm going to say, I'm making a conscious effort to move my legs less. We should get you an exercise band and put it around your knees. Yeah. Or just a rope. A rope that just ties my feet like this.

I specifically washed my feet before I came here today. And then put your shoes on. Just in case the shoes come on. I looked at the last podcast that the YouTube comments and there were four or five that were like, oh man, I get it. I have Russell Slag Syndrome too. And then probably eight or nine that were like, I can't watch it. Turn it off immediately. So I'm really trying here.

So that's for you guys at home just so you know. Yeah. Good on you. All right. Top three DFL. Here we got. This popped in my head the other day. The top three things.

And I don't know how. Okay. Top three things that are not crimes. They're not illegal, but that you think should be punished with the death sentence. Oh, wow. Or life in prison. I get where you're going on. You're being dramatic, but I get what you're saying.

So they're not crimes, but you think people should do jail time. How do we do DFL? Is it something that's illegal that shouldn't be? DFL. DFL is something that you know other people hate, but you like doing it, proving that you're a bad person. Oh, wow. Okay. All right. Okay. That's trickier, but yeah, top three. I'll go. I got a couple. I mean, you know, I'll go quick. I'm going to really sink my own ship when I do my DFL. Well, number three is just anybody who shakes their leg on camera should be put to death immediately. That's fine. That's mine. That's mine. Nice. Nice. Number two. Actually, I'm going to go number one because I still got to think about number two. Number one, and people might get mad about this, but if you cheat on your wife or husband, I kind of hope you do.

die because if it never happened to me. Not a crime. Right. Not a crime. Right. Yeah. Yeah, exactly. Biblically, you think you should go to jail for it. Well, no, no, death penalty. I don't think jail. All right. I think they should be heavy-handily beat up by the spouse. Okay. All right. And then I'll go back up to two. Let's say, if you, if you don't like sushi, it's a real, I got a big problem with that. So if you can't eat sushi and you won't do it and you call other people out for eating raw fish, I think you should go to jail. I almost spat my coffee out. That was so funny. But I like that call, by the way. I like that call a lot. All right. So my DFL, gosh. This is something that other people hate, but you do it anyway. Because you love it. I don't do it anyways. Oh, man. Gosh, this is tough. Do you know yours? Yeah. Unfortunately, I'm very embarrassed to admit it publicly, but I'm going to. So I'm just trying to get done quick so it doesn't hold up the pod. So I'm going to say eating with your mouth open. I'm, and, and,

sleeping with your mouth open. I'm a bit of a mouth breather. And sometimes I chew with my mouth open and people want to kill me. Do you? I've gotten much better at it. I'm going to now pay attention to that when we order food today. Well, Pat would be disgusted by it. He just, remember that time he came over to me? I was just eating normally and he just goes, ugh, and walked away. I walked away. All right. All right. I got mine. Cool. All right. Number one's obvious. Okay, number three, you should go to jail, not prison. I think it's like three months. To where it sucks.

You have to go to jail for three months. If someone holds the door for you and you don't acknowledge them. Sure. Oh, wow. Which happens all of a time. That's real shitty. Yeah. You really thought about this.

That's a really good one. It happens a lot because I go to Starbucks like probably three, four times a week just to get out of the house. Grab the door for someone. Pull the door for someone. Someone's walking out with two drinks. Oftentimes they're on their phone. Don't even make eye contact. Yeah.

The worst is at the daycare, dude. Because like you'll hold, and then you'll get stuck for like five people. Yeah. It's just like a line of people while you're waiting with your kid. But the idea that you could be on your phone and someone holds a door for you and you don't even look at them because you're so. Just look and smile and nod. That's it. That's shitty, man.

Yeah. That's what you do. Yep. A real over-the-top mouthing of the words. Thank you. I'm really on that one with you. That's making me feel something. Number two.

this just happened to me the other day. People who, look, I like the vibe when someone's walking around riding their bike with a boombox or like a little Bluetooth speaker. It's fun. At the beach, whatever. If you're in public and you're blasting music with super foul lyrics. Yeah. Three years in prison. Yeah, I like that.

I like that a lot. Three years in prison. I like that a lot. doing it at the park the other day with a bunch of three-year-old right next to a bunch of three-year-old soccer practice. Yeah. And it was like the most vulgar shit you can imagine. Unacceptable.

And some of the other parents made their kids cover their ears. Dude. I didn't because I was like, that's a little over the top. Yeah. A little over. But it was still like loud. And it was like, fuck your mother. No, dude.

Well, wait. So it was the person who was doing it, were they scary or were they like a normal person? Because I definitely no one that I was going up. No, but you, I was going to say like, you wouldn't. They were using the workout equipment and I would say repping like 30 perfect form pull-ups. Yeah, it'd be great if you could just call the cops and be like, hey. Yeah. Go on over here and take this kind of jail for three years.

So number one, and you're going to have to go to a jury trial. And if you can prove that you had an illness or a food poisoning, then you can get bumped down to just one year in prison. Okay. Otherwise, this is life in prison. Yep. farting on an airplane. Oh, man. That's going to be hard to beat.

If you fart on an airplane, knowingly, just because you kind of have to fart. Right, right, right. You should sit in discomfort for hours. And it's not even that bad. I'm sure the seatbelt sign goes off. Get up and go to the restroom and fart into a towel. A fart can be held for 12 hours, if need be. Like if it's a shit and you're trying to hold that in, that can get rough, but you wait

to go to the bathroom. But a fart, a pure fart can be held in maybe. for a full day. Or just push it, push it back up and burp it out. Just take your hand and go right up there and push it out. I just want to point out how immature Kyle is. This is the hardest he's ever laughed at us talking about holding it farts on a airplane. Know your audience. Now I'm really curious to hear what your dad fucking lasts. I didn't put any thought of this, but I did think of something I do that I'm not going to stop doing. Okay. Even though it's socially unacceptable. Okay. Probably about 10 years ago, I just decided

that if I have a crusty booger in my nose, I don't care where I am, I'm getting it out. Oh my, that's one of my top three. And I'm getting it out. You're going to prison. Wow. I'm going to just pick my nose. There's a trash can I'll throw it in the can.

Otherwise, it's a little flicker. Yeah, I'm not talking about it. I'm not doing it for fun. I'm not digging around. Yeah, yeah, I get that. But you know when you got a crusty one that kind of, you feel it? Yeah.

Get it out. Man, what happens though when you got a little crusty one, then you pull it out and it's a big slimy. It just doesn't happen. You just got dry nostrils. Okay, here we go. Top three, dear fell. That's funny, because I swear to God, my third one is nose picking in public.

If I see someone pick, and it's not just nose picking, it's, you know, digging in there, like, doing anything nasal in public. Like, I, this was less than two weeks ago. I pulled up to a traffic light, and I looked over to the left, and there was a guy knuckles deep fucking trying to scratch his brain. Was it like this? No, it was the same side as me. Yeah, and he was just trying to fucking tickle his brain, dude, and he was knuckles deep. He's in his own car. He's by himself, and I looked at him, and I held my stare of repulse as long as I could until he saw me.

And he literally turned finger and nose and saw me. Yeah. And I just kept staring at him, like, grimacing. And then, and then I went through his head. That guy's got a tiny dick. Yeah, he did, he did. But it just, it repulsed. Like, I'm literally getting stomach wiggles thinking about it.

It's not great. I mean, prison time? You should definitely be beat up for it. And here's the thing. Nose picking, fine. Do it in the discretion of your own home. Do it in your shower, whatever. You go to the desert.

You got to pick your nose all day. All day long. All day long. But don't do it in public. Just wear those big, crusty desert boogers. I got a feeling you guys are going to get in a fight on set about this at one point or another. Okay, that's number three. Number two.

Damn, I had these all thoughts. out. Now I've forgotten all of them. I got too hyped up on the nose. I did. I really, I really went into it. That was number three. Number two is when you are using a public restroom and you see somebody leave the urinal or toilet without washing their hands. Okay. It happens pretty often. It happens every, every time you're in an airport. If you're in an airport, you will see, you'll, you'll be walking over to wash your hands after using the urinal and you'll see the guy who was next to you or walking, just walk straight out. I've done it. I've done it on past those days now that I have children, But I have been tipsy and I'll just walk out and I would not wash my hands.

Because you're also boarding your plane at the last minute. Exactly. Because you're at the bar. Here's what I think every time I see it. I don't care how much hand sanitizer you've got in your little backpack. I don't care what's going on in your life. I might have to shake your hand later. I don't know why.

Someone does. Someone's going to shake your hand today. And you just wiped your ass and didn't wash them. Oh, God. The urinals, although you don't wipe your ass after the urine. I'm just saying, don't do it. Just go wash your hands after. How many years in prison for this?

A minimum of five. Five years. Minimum of five. They should have people standing guard at the sinks and airports. Now, what if you don't touch anything? So, okay, here's the kicker, I'll say. If you only touch your own penis at the urinal and touch nothing else, I'm okay with it. Unless you're a silent spreader.

That's true. Yeah. But, yeah, that's the only time that it's maybe okay. And you still got to hit some hand sanitizer or something. Sure. Since hand sanitizer has become a thing, I do, I obsessively do the hand sanitizer now because it's everywhere. It's so easy.

Number one. I've never used it. Really? Number one. Maybe that's why it feels is so dry. It's slightly less relevant to today's world, but it's something that probably the closest I've ever come to multiple fights in my life. What is it?

Talking in a movie theater. Oh, yeah, dude. It is shut up. Yeah, it's hard. Just shut up. It's very difficult to be. It's two hours. You're in.

Common space, you're all there to be tuned in to the movie. Shut up. Yeah. Dude, I swear to God, because this is such a pet peeve of mine, I'm always seated next to a couple that has to talk throughout the movie. And it's like, I'll sit there, like, digging my nails into the seat, trying to behave myself. I've snapped multiple times.

In the theater. I've been in theaters where other people have snapped on talkers. It's insane. And it gets awkward, yeah. It's awful. Stop going to the theater entirely because of this. I love movie theaters. I can't wait to see the new Wolverine Devering.

Deadpool movie, which I know isn't going to be good. I'm going to go see it in theaters. I think it'll be good for a theater. For what it is. It's a theater. Yeah. Kind of stand it. Talking in movie theaters. Yeah, it's a bad one. DFL really going to sink my own ship here, not proud of this. Oh boy, jerking off in public, farting on planes. At the same time. Oh, man, I really don't want to admit this, but I will.

You got to. It happened for the first time in college, and it got such a raucous response that I kept doing it, and I still do it to this day. and what it was is we were all hanging out at a party and I had to sneeze and I turned my head to sneeze and by accident I sneezed on Jessica and I was like

and like big spray sneeze like literally like maybe a foot and a half from her face and I was like oh my God I'm sorry and there was like eight of my buddies like Ricardo you guys know we're all staying there and burst into laughter so then it was a thing

oh man so I became a thing where every time I had to sneeze I'd look for Jessica and sneeze on her this is terrible she's got some deep resentment towards you for sure. I still do it. Like, I'll be at home by myself. And when we sit on the couch, I'm being, ha, ha, ha.

I just, like, she's in the shower. You run in, pull the thing. And sneeze on her. Shower would be the most appropriate place because it rinse it right off. I told you it's an awful habit, but it's, it's really funny. It's become habitual. I got a runner up one. I just want to mention that popped in.

Dude, when somebody had, when they're at the top of their ass crack hangs out, and then they just go. back there and like scratch it. Have you ever seen that? No. Yeah, I just saw it the other day in a fucking parking lot, bro. I was like, these are the dregs of society. This was like a guy who clearly was unshowered, like just greasy. Unshowered butter.

I had to stop in my car for a minute and just like shake off. I was just like, what the fuck? Like, how could this person be allowed to walk around? Kyle, Kyle, give us one. We don't need a top three DFL. Give us one that just drives you insane. One, the thing that came to mind is like when there's a giant line of cars and the person just comes up and just cuts. Oh, well, that's execution.

That's like there should be a cop with a bazooka who blows that car out of the line. That might actually be a crime. It probably is. It should be. Or when someone pulls into a parking space that you've been waiting for. That's what he's saying. Oh, is that what you're talking about for a parking space? Or merging.

Yeah, I got to merge. Merging. Oh, the parking space one's insane. To me, that's the most furious I ever get. I've not encountered that because I would remember and I would probably be in jail for killing somebody. 100%. That was a good top three DFL. Yeah, it was fun.

I like that. It was really fun. If you're watching or listening and you can comment, let us know some that we missed. Definitely. Because this is fun. Let's find a few. Let's scan the comments. We'll read it.

Oh, absolutely. Hey, speaking of watching or listening, we have a pretty exciting photography competition going on. That's right. How does that work? Oh, you listen. Actually, Kyle, why don't you explain this photography? We've gotten like 200, almost 300 submissions so far, by the way. Yeah. Do it quickly, Kyle.

Sure. Yeah. Submit a photo, link down in the description below. Ends on August 16th. The winner is going to be, we're going to print out the photo and display it in the studio somewhere. Hell yeah. That's real fun. We need another.

Where are we going to put it? Probably behind you on the table area. Wherever it fits. Wherever it fits. Yeah. If it's amazing, dude, it might replace the horns. So that would be wild. With the amount of agita that was caused to get those horns up,

I think Kyle and Forrest would not be up. It was four hours of our eight-hour studio. I would rip that thing down and smash it against the ground if we ever have to hang it. It almost caused a fight. The amount of time it took for Forrest and Kyle to get those horns up. Peter and I built these tables and all three chairs. Yep, that's out of box. And laid the carpet down and put the wallpaper up and everything else.

The wallpaper now. That was a whole thing. So you said you're going out of town? Not for another couple weeks. What's the adventure? Oh, this will actually be really fun. I'm going to, maybe Kyle, maybe you can pull up the thing, the pond thing. I'm going to pondemonium.

Pondemonium? Check this out. That's pretty cool. Cool story here. So this guy, Greg, he owns this company called Aquascape. Was he at AnimalCon? He was. Yeah, we talked to him, the pond guy.

Yeah. So he reached out to me after AnimalCon and says, hey, I do my own version of AnimalCon, which is called pondemone. Wow. It's for all these people that have these. And like, I'm not talking like my backyard koi pond. I mean, he did like Shacks Pond. Right.

Like these crazy elaborate. He had a TV show. A reality show. Because it's a hobby for some people. It's like keeping a pond. Yeah, Kyle, maybe you can pull up like his Instagram has some really good stuff. But it's, uh, he builds these phenomenal ponds. They're aquascapes, right?

If you want to elevate from the word pond. Right. And, uh, and yeah. So Greg reached out to me after AnimalCon and goes, hey, would you come and speak on like freshwater animals and things at pondemonium. Awesome. And so I said to him, I was like, well, listen, Greg, I will. You know, my public speaking fee is actually pretty high.

And this is sort of a new thing, your pondemonium thing. It's only in the second year. Yeah. But I'll make you a deal. What if I come and speak at pondemonium and in exchange for that when we buy our forever home in the next few years, you come and build me one of your ponds, you know, in a similar value. And he's like, you got it.

That's amazing. So on a handshake deal, I'm going out to be the keynote at this super rad pond event, hang out at this really cool facility. That's sweet. And in a few years, Greg's going to build me a pond. Dude, I didn't realize how big of a thing like keeping coy ponds is. Obviously, I don't think billions of people are doing it. But for like people that are really into this stuff, it's a huge thing.

Huge. Yeah, a huge little subculture. And not just that, but like, remind me to tell you about my after college business that we had an idea to do. but uh but no none of you can hear it listeners because we're going to talk about it later no no i'll talk about it now but it's a keeping coy is a huge thing but these pawns are like a big deal and what gregg's done so successfully that's so cool is he makes them all like sustainable so they have like some filtration and some of them have heating and blah blah blah and they run year round and they're like crystal clear you can go swimming in them wow so they're they're more like uh i forget what he calls them but

it's not it's not really fountain no but it's it's not like a swimming pool and it's It's not a fish pond. It's like a living pool. Yeah. So you like have, what's it called? Recreational pot. A recreational pot. I thought I had a better name than that.

But it's basically this thing in your backyard that has coy and turtles and growing water lilies and all these plants and your kids can go swim in it and play in it. Wow, that's a huge benefit, man. I would love to have that for my kid. Isn't that cool? Well, you have a pool, though. No, no. My pool's horrible.

I hate it. Oh, that's true. You do talk about it. Well, it's much too big. I hate it. Well, before I forget, my buddy Ricardo and I had this great idea that after college, we were going to buy a piece of dirt in the middle of nowhere and start a koi farm all based on the name, which was going to be coy it is.

Coydus. That was in college that you had that idea? Yeah. Makes sense. Yeah, it does. Yeah. We put zero effort into it. Never was going to happen.

But we really, we even made a logo for coy it is, which was just too coy having sex. Kyle, make sure you get that from him. Bring it up on air. Well, no, I, so I used to know someone who was known as the coy whisperer. Okay. Her job was like people with extravagant coy ponds, the coy are dying, can you fly to Atlanta and figure out what's going on? And she was the coy whisperer. Full-time job.

Wow. Just like, would fly to Japan. Stuff like that. Let's play a game. Let's play a game. We're ready? Yeah. Kyle, no cheating.

Okay. Off the cuff game. What do you think? And I don't know the answer, but I'm going to take a guess here too. What do you think the most expensive coy that has ever sold to cost? I was sold. I hope Kyle can find the answer to this. I think so keeping Koi is something that you're more likely to do if you're wealthy.

Certainly. Because you need to own property. You need to own enough property to have a pond on it. Yep, certainly. Obviously, Koi come from Japan. Japan's a company with a country with where a lot of rich people live. $250,000. Wow.

Okay. $250,000. Peter, what do you think? Well, quick question. First, Koi is just a fancy carp, right? That's right. Okay, so I think they can live to be like 50 or 60 years old. They live a long time.

They get big. They're invasive. They get to like 20 pounds. Carp are invasive. So, Koi are selectively bred carp. Okay. They took carp and went, oh, these ones have the best colors. These ones have the longest fins and selectively bred them for many generations

to make these incredible ornamental fish. Gotcha. The Japanese thing. That definitely helps my decision. Regardless. It's a big thing. Like, you can be a coy collect, just like anything, right? We've seen $10,000 lizards on this pod.

Yeah, like, or those snakes that they make that they do all the colors of the interbreeding and stuff. So what do you think the most expensive coy ever was? I think, wow. I'm going to go just maybe $17,500. Okay. Kyle, take a crack and then, and then Google it while I make my guess. I was going to say $75,000. Wow.

You said, you said quarter mill? $250. All right. I'm going to even go up from Pat. I'm going to say half mill. Let's see what we get here. Probably. Well, that's why you're making the...

One point eight million dollars. I need to see this coy fish that was sold in 2018. Yeah, please. For 1.8 million dollars. For single fish. Could you imagine if there was just no pictures of it? They should have done coy. It looks like every coy I've seen.

There's got to be something to it. There's got to be... Hang on. It's got a perfect back... Bullshit on this. That's not the one point. There's not even like... Yes, it is. There's no, I don't believe it.

This is on Reddit. So this is, it's the typical white and orange coy fish. I don't get it. Average size. Why is that the most expensive coy? Well, Kyle brought it up for 0.5 seconds, so. That is it. I love how it's in a kid's bath.

Okay, listen, so here's what I knew or know. Okay. Is that there are certain coy that get the Japanese flag, like the perfect red circle. And those are worth the most because the circle's the most symmetrical, whatever. So I just assumed this was going to be like a high. color variant with a perfect circle. That just looked like your generic. I have a coy that looks exactly like that in my pawn that I paid $8.99.

This is why your company would never take off. Coitus would not take off because you don't know enough about Coi. So that Coi won the All Japan Coisho Grand Champion and then was sold the following year for the $1.8 million. That's insane. See, there's the one with the Japanese flag dot on the head. That's kind of cool. Yeah.

Yeah, it's very cool. I like that. See the far left one there with the black? See, that's much cool. Yeah, I was just going to say, all those other four are way cooler than the one that won. Maybe it's like the temperament of the fish or something that makes it. The fish that sold for 1.8, how did that even win Grand Champion? I don't know.

There's nothing exciting about it. Well, so, I mean, I don't know if we want to look it up, but I would love to know, like, what is the qualification to win that competition? Oh, we should. I mean, this is important things. Before we move on and figure out what criteria makes it, if you want to learn more about Koi, if you guys want to come out, this Pondamonium event, a public event. event. Anybody can join. I'll be there August 17th through the 20th in Illinois. Oh, it's my birthday. He'll be out there in Illinois. I'm a mater.

Where the Koi Whisperer lives. Wow. Is it? She'll probably be at the event. Coy is our national fish. So there you go. If you guys want to come out and see me talk and meet Greg and see some incredible ponds, come to Ponemoneum sometime August 17th to the 20th and I will see you guys there. All right. So Kyle pulled it up. Pat, what are the criteria here that you're reading that make a koi worth $1.8 million. It's basically the same as like the Westminster Dog Show. It's just pretty much subjective judgments on the beauty of the pattern, the head, the symmetry of the pectoral fins.

So they're really getting in the weeds. But so. No pun intended. Yeah. So it has to be considered a show quality coy. Yeah. And it says of the 50,000 coy born each year, only 50 will be deemed show quality. Oh, interesting.

Yeah, it is interesting. I wonder if they have to do any... No, that's under 1%. That's 0.1%. Yeah. I wonder if they have to do any behavioral things like they do at the dog show at all. I think they just kind of sit in a little pool and they just look at it. There's no way they'd have to jump through a hoop or... No way, dude. No way. Look at those. See, those ones are sick. I'd pay 1.4 million for one of those coy long before that orange guy. The black and orange is spicy.

I still want $3 billion to just take one random shit. every day. Oh, that's right. Yeah, you can start a coy pond. All right. Loving this coy banter. So, well, you're at Pondamonium hanging out with coy fish. You got a, you got a big B day coming up. Yeah, that's right. So you're 40th? 49. Well, it's 40-something. Okay. You're in your 40s. Yeah. Yeah. So I actually set up a little Amazon link. You guys could go a shop for me. Oh, thank you. Yeah. How does that work? I'm not going to do that. It's on the website. I put at the top. Click it. Buy me a gift. No, don't. You're a little. You're a little. You're a little. You're The gift will be just shopping through our Amazon link on the website.

What is the Amazon link? I don't understand. I don't even know what this is. I don't get it. You just go there and you click. Kyle, what is our Amazon link? It's just a series of items that we like and think that people will also like.

You can just click the link below in the description and go shop around. Put it this way. If you're the most bored you've ever been and you've run out of Instagram and other things to scroll through, you could just go see what we have on there. I now understand it. Kyle asked me for a list of my favorite, like, tools. and things on Amazon. I thought he was just trying to be me.

Oh, yeah. I literally just thought he was trying to, like, get the boots I wear and the pants I wear and a cool sunglasses. I didn't realize that's what this was for. No, but it does. You gave me no context. It does. How about the show?

It's an easy thing to do when you click through the link. If you buy something on Amazon that's not even on the list, we still get like, you know, five cents for it. So, Peter, do the thing. Well, you know, the thing is wild times. That club forward slash info for all the links. You can now get all of our ad for. premium episodes on Apple.

You can get it on Spotify. You can go on Patreon and get it. You know, we do six episodes a month. Only two or three are public every month. So go get that. You want ad free. You want fucking more content. Wildimes.compt. Club forward slash info.

I love all of you. No problems here. No problem. It is. Coy is. I cannot wait to cut so I can just fucking shake the shit out of my legs. Oh, yeah.

Got an hour of the earthquake in here. Peter's going to fart like he's on an airplane.