Wild Times: Wildlife Education - The Leopard That Became A Serial Killer - The Wild Times Ep. 141

Episode Date: April 1, 2024

We discuss the man-eating leopard of Rudraprayag, a photographer who captured photos of a leopard in a tree, play Bizarre Animal of the Week, and why Forrest was cold plunging with a dead body. Prize Picks: Download the app today and use code "wild" for a first deposit match up to $100! DUER: Get 20% off now! https://shopduer.com/wild Mando: Control Body Odor ANYWHERE with @shop.mando and get $5 off your Starter Pack (that’s over 40% off) with promo code WILD at https://ShopMando.com #mandopod Magic Mind: https://www.magicmind.com/forrest FORREST gets you up to 56% off your first subscription for the next 10 days. 🎧 Exclusive Ad-Free Podcasts on Spotify 🎧 Subscribe for more: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/sh... 💖 Join Our Patreon Community 💖 Unlock exclusive perks: https://www.patreon.com/wildtimespod/ 🔊 Listen to Our Show on Spotify 🔊 Explore our episodes: https://open.spotify.com/show/2cbFBzf... 📡 Subscribe via RSS 📡 Add us to your podcatcher: https://anchor.fm/s/aee18224/podcast/rss 📸 Follow Us on Instagram 📸 For awesome animal facts and videos: http://instagram.com/wildtimespod 💬 Join the Conversation on Discord 💬 Connect with fellow nature lovers: https://discord.gg/ytzKBbC9Db 👕 Shop Our Exclusive Merchandise 👕 Wear your passion: https://thewildtimespodcast.com/merch Enjoy, brosteners! TWT 141 - The Breakdown 00:00 - Intro/Gifts from Patrick's Neice 03:00 - Photographer Captures Insane Leopard Photos 07:08 - Leopard of Rudraprayag 12:51 - Forrest Murder Mystery 13:55 - Valentine's Day 20:47 - NASA and Google Team Up to Help Save Tigers 23:25 - Joe Exotic's Tweet 27:15 - Forrest's Family Had A Hit on Them 32:20 - Mushroom Hunting 36:00 - Bizarre Animal of the Week 43:20 - Saltwater Aquariums 48:20 - Fancy Colored Lights in Water 49:54 - Battle Royale 58:42 - Eating Hot Bears Jingles made by: www.soundcloud.com/mimmkey https://www.newbelgium.com/beer/fat-tire/ #wildtimespod #podcast

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And we're going to eat the world's hottest gummy bear. And I've already eaten one. And these are tears of joy. We'll see you there. Let's get into it. Wild times. Wow. He brought it today. I'm excited. Woo! Here we go. Wild times. The only podcast that Joe Rogan listens to every single episode. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Hard fact.

Which is pretty cool. How's it going, guys? That's great, man. Pick trash shirt. I'm going to start over there. I'm not your host. I'm just hanging out with Professor PhD in podcasting. Yeah.

Retap. Yeah, it's good, man. Happy to be here. Always happy to be in the newish stud. I got some gifts for you guys. Oh, you're just going to pop right in. by loyal listener. Oh, really?

My niece, Danny, made these for us. Thanks, Danny. What is this? Forrest for you, I have a blue whale chain. Ooh. Wow, look at that. That's lovely. Thanks, Danny.

It was very cool. I'm wearing this for the pod. For Retep, I have, what kind of shark is this? A great white. Can I see it? Yeah. Mako. The thresher?

Greenland. A lemon shark. Oh. Here's a little lemon shark necklace. Oh, yeah. Lemon shark, baby. I love this. Yeah.

What do I have here? Is it yours? Is this a reefer? Yours looks to be... No, it's like a dogfish or maybe a seven gill. Looks like a seven gill. I have a seven gill chain. Oh my God, my next way too fat.

I got to move my... Is it too fat? It doesn't fit on you? No. You're heinous. Oh, I'm not heinous, yo. All right. What is up?

What's going on, Forrest? How are you? I'm very well. Thank you very much. Happy to be here. It's the joy of my week when I get to sit in the studio. with you guys and hang out. It really is. I am going to make it a little bit more enjoyable.

I have something that I'd like to give to each of us later on the episode that I think is going to be... Perpes. No chance I can put this on. Very entertaining. So look forward to that. And if it is not done, I want everybody to DM Pat and Forrest personally, repeatedly until we do do do it. So stay tuned for that. Two things. One, he said do-do and two, I just put my headphones.

within my necklace chain. What a mess. Look at this. Come on. This is good, dude. This is good content. Very good content. I'm just rambling over here while.

All right. Well, look, there's a lot of news to talk about. I'm going to have my magic mind. No, don't laugh. I got to. I'll do a little sipping on the magic mind. I got to be thinking out of a tough night last night. One of the kids is sick.

My kids is always fucking sick. Yes. And this just helps me stay sharp, stay focused. And I want some. I told you the way to do it. I have to see it. He shoots him. I sip them slowly.

Nah, I like to take it all in. Kyle, you like these a lot. How do you do yours? Love them. Shoot it. Shoot it, right? It's the only way. Well, Kyle also shoots heroin.

So that's, that's for, that's for him. I almost spat my magic. So there was a news story that came out. What's in the news? Yeah, he's on the ball today, gentlemen. And I was like, holy shit. When I saw the headline. And then Forrest was like, no, you don't know about this?

And I was like, no. Well, I didn't say it like that. I was like, yeah. Yeah, like, but I was like, when you see the headline, yeah, photographer captures leopard eating a crocodile in a tree, I'm interested. Yeah, that's the click bait. I'd be more interested if it said,

photographer captures crocodile eating leopard in a tree. That would be more cool. Before we get into this, I could have sworn, didn't you actually film a jaguar eating a cayman? Oh, it was a jaguar eating a cayman. Up in a tree, though. Like, dragged it up and a hill. You should pull that up, Kyle. It's got 36 million views on my TikTok.

So what, so I mean. That's an insane number of people. I know nothing about TikTok. I don't even know, is that good? I mean, I think it's good. I don't really know much about it either, but it sounds like a lot. It's a tenth of the population of the United States have watched this video. That's an insane statistic.

So, so now is this more impressive, your video right here for us? No, this so, okay, absolutely not, first of all. So it's not because in the Pontinol where I filmed this on Jessica's iPhone, this is a common occurrence where it's the place that people go to see Jaguars attacking and eating Cayman. Wow. Okay. Granted, I got a really, really good video. Yeah. But compared to a leopard in sub-Saharan Africa with a Nile crocodile up a tree, that is a rarity. That's a decent size crocodile.

It's obviously not a massive one, but it's a pretty big crock. How big would you say that is? Based on the size of a leopard, probably seven feet, six, seven feet. Damn. These pictures are incredible. These are fucking cool. Sorry, where was this taken here? It's got to be in southern Africa. Kenya. Kenya? Oh, never mind. Yeah. There you go. So this guy, I mean, this leopard has taken this crock up into the tree

just so it can enjoy its meal alone and in solitude. Yeah. So leopards always do that. That's a great photo. That's amazing. Yeah. Whether they're killing an Impala or anything else. what's unusual about this is not the behavior. One, the photos are fantastic. That's the main thing. But two is the fact that you're seeing a leopard that successfully killed and is now trying to covet this crocodile

because that's what's unusual. In Africa, unlike in the Pontinol with the Jaguars, in Africa, leopards don't often choose to prey on crocodiles. It's too dangerous. If you're a leopard, you go down the water,

you drink, you get the hell out of there as quickly as you can because a crocodile and on the flip side of this, Kyle, maybe find a video of a now crocodile attacking a leopard happens all the time. No thanks. Yeah. I don't want to watch it. But in this instance, what probably happened is that leopard found the crocodile in a small pan or cruising over the ground.

Yeah. Those are cheetahs. God, people are stupid. Is that a cheetah? That is a cheetah as well. That is a jaguar. That's a cheetah. Yeah.

So it's common for these crocs to take whatever's dipping the nose in the water. It's not common to see an African leopard eat a crocodile. So that's pretty cool. So I wonder if the crock was like came up out of the water a little bit and then was headed back and it got it by the tail. Yeah. Traveling over land could be in a small pan, you know, what we call a pan, which is like a puddle basically, like a seasonal puddle. Yeah. So if the crock was over land, that it's done.

Is that? Oh, yeah. Leopard would have every advantage of the agility. Now, that's a leopard there, right? Yeah. Yep. I mean, what an absolute killing. machine. Leopards?

Just, yeah, they're unbelievable. Because they're super agile and quick. What was that one that we wrote that show? It was a Chumbalot? No, that was the tiger.

But remember the man eating leopard in India that would stalk the roofed? The leopard of Rujapragh? That sounds about, right? Rood Pryog, I think. Something like that. Yeah. There's a bunch of famous men.

Yeah. There it is. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So what's this story? This, this, oh, the guy went out there.

Yeah. Yeah. There was a Jim Corbett, wasn't it? Yep. Yeah. Jim Corbett, who Patrick and I both love, went out and killed this man-eating leopard

that in India killed 125 people. So wild, man. That's a lot of people. Oh, absolutely. Like, imagine, like, if you were a guy in the war with a gun, right. And you killed 125 people, you would be seen as, like,

the most badass war hero ever. This is a kitty cat. Dude, absolutely. And also, like, it didn't kill them all at once. They were made aware that this was happening, and it was still able to, go and get them. It was spread over a course of about seven or eight years. Yeah. Man, that

is wild time. But it's like drastically affected people's behavior. Yeah. Like when they would, when they would work, when they would not, you know, like, it was a fucking huge deal. And then naturally Jim Corbett came in and got it. It's like having a boogeyman, just, it's like having a serial killer, but worse, in your neighborhood.

Exactly. By the way, remember the pod we did a couple weeks ago? Um, where we talked about the game show where we have David Goggins run out. Yes. Jim, yeah. Jim Corbett would get David Gagins. Easily. He's the only one who would.

He could track anything. Guys, of it would get Guggins. Pretty soon we're going to be able to make that with the, I'm sorry, AI video. Sora. Yeah. Called Sora. Is that what it is?

Yeah, it's insane. So you mentioned the, like having a serial killer in your neighborhood. When I was a kid, when I was a kid, right? Yes. So I grew up in a Swigo, New York. There's a state penitentiary in Auburn, which is maybe an hour away. Uh-huh. And, uh, a.

murderer escaped. Right? He escaped the prison. That's nerve-wracking. Killed. Oh, my God. And they didn't know where he was, right? So my friend went out of town on vacation, and they had a house sitter who was my brother's friend. Yeah.

And he was house sitting. And the guy was squatting in their house while they were on vacation. Holy shit. And he killed this guy. What? Yeah. This is like in your neighborhood neighborhood? It's a small. Oswego's not tiny, but it's about 20,000 people.

That's pretty small. So, yeah, so everybody knows there's a escaped con from Auburn who's loose in our town. And this was over the summer vacation, right? And this was when I was young. I was probably 11 or 12. Oh, man. So, you know, the whole like ride your bikes all over town, you know, blah, blah, blah, like was not, everything was like on lockdown for like a couple weeks. in one point we were swimming in the pool and my friend's grandfather came running out with a shotgun and he was like he was just spotted

get in the house it was fucking crazy I love it Vigil anti-justice But like dude it was wild Like you know being 11, 12 years old And going to trying to go to sleep at night In the house with just my mom

Oh yeah And you know there's a murderer like walking the streets hiding out is pretty fucking gnarly Yeah that is pretty wild Dude I'm terrified if my foot dangles off over the side of the bed. We'll check, check this out. Kyle, pull up that picture.

Peter? Yes. I'm a doer. Did you know that? You are a doer. You're one of the biggest doers I know. I do things and I'll tell you something else. I love my doer jeans and I mean it.

And I know that was a ridiculous setup, but I just got back from Japan. I literally flew there in my black dewer jeans and my my reddish t-shirt. I wore it on the plane. I then wore it every night to dinner. and then wore it on the flight home. Didn't feel dirty, didn't feel gross, super comfy. You know, it's made from all natural fibers, so it's super stretchy and breathable. It's really like temperature regulating.

And it has antibacterial treatment, which for me, who's like a future Howard Hughes, who's like terrified of germs the human make, didn't even worry about it. It's unreal, man. Like, I'm not joking. It's literally the best bottom half clothing I've ever worn in my life. Bottom half's important. Dude, that's where all the good stuff. is.

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It is literally that easy. Do you guys know where that is? That's the creek by your house, no? That's the creek by my house. What happened here? Scroll up, Kyle. At the Daily News Hoc. Look at this.

Oh, wow. That's the creek that I cold plunge in. So the headline says detectives investigating suspicious death after body found in Dude, it was a whole, it was a whole to do. Yeah, I'm sure. I was trying to get home in time to actually to go see our buddy Gotti for his show. I was trying to get home in time. Yeah.

Road was closed off, yellow tape, the whole fucking thing. They wouldn't let me. And I was like, that's my house. You can't keep me out of my own house. Had to go and get like whoever the chief police officer was, tell him. Then I was like, I have to come back out in 20 minutes. Like I'm just showering, changing and leaving. He's like, no, no, no going in and out.

I'm like, bullshit no going in and out. Like this is my driveway. Yeah. That's my creek. What did they end up doing? They let you in and out? They did. But it was like a whole to do.

There's fire trucks, police trucks. Turns out they said, I think, the next day and the next article, that it wasn't foul play. It was the guy probably killed himself or something. But yeah. Just in Santa Barbara. where fucking nothing happened. On Valentine's Day, by the way, this happened. So maybe he was just depressed.

I've had some sad Valentine's Day, but I usually just go to a hooker. Now, see, that's interesting because I'm sure I've been single and not had a sweetie. On a Valentine's Day. No, you haven't. You're addicted to relationships. In my adult life.

I'm sure that I have. But it's not something I could see affecting me. Right. Would you be sad if you were alone? No. Like, do you care about Valentine's Day? I haven't celebrated Valentine's Day since I was 17, 18? Yeah.

Like, seriously, like this year, I didn't... Not a card, not a flower, not a nice meal. I mean, nothing. Like, there's nothing. I bought my son a chocolate bar that was in a heart shape. Yeah. That was it. I will say, I think it's even better than that.

If you're single on Valentine's Day, that it's like there's a whole crew of people who are also single, who are laughing at the couples and who just want to go out and bang. Yes, that's a fantastic point. Kyle, you're single. You've always been single since I've known you. This is true, actually. Yeah. Have you gone out, like, have you gone out on Valentine's Day being like, oh, tonight's the night? That'll be good. That'll be good. No, it's usually just me going out with my friends and hanging out. Have you never tried to chase tail on Valentine's Day? Of course. Chase tale. So, Kyle, what does it look like when you and your friends go out? Do you guys kind of just huddle in a circle and like chuckle?

Well, I mean, more. more or less yeah i mean we kind of just you know sit around at a table who's the guy in your group yeah for what you know who's your graber yeah who's your graber the guy who quite frankly we all have a guy yeah everybody's got one and it's very annoying if you don't know what we're talking about there's a guy in every group of friends when you go out you're like oh we're gonna go like watch a game and like eat some wings and you just want to have fun yeah there's always one guy who's like yo let's go talk to those girls the creeper he branches off he's usually really good at talking, probably the

second most handsome guy in the group, because the most handsome's a little bit shy. Yeah. Yeah. He's vagina motivated. Whereas, like, I wasn't, vagina motivated after I was like 24. I was like, 24. I was like, now I'm good. Like, I've had enough crazy relationships that I'm okay

to, to not deal with this shit for a little while. Who's your guy? Who's your guy? Yeah. I don't want to out him, but his... Say his first name. His name rhymes with Radham. Okay. So, Adam. So pull up a picture of Adam. What's his last name?

Pull up a picture of Adam. Come on, Kyle. It's good for him. It's good for him. I know our demographic of people that listen to this. They want to see what your guy looks like. I like how you're like, I'm not going to out of it. The next thing about it's out of past out. He's just. Just blur his face. Yeah. What's his at? Here we go. No, no, it's social security number. Oh, yeah. That's for us. That's for us. That's, that's, that's Kyle. He's like, this is our guy. Yeah, exactly. He's out there looking for tail. Oh, yeah. That's definitely.

Oh, my God. That is the most guy. Fucking pocket square. Clearly the guy. Fucking pocket square. Let me see another pick of this guy. Wow. This is like his Tinder fucking pro.

Oh, yeah. No question. Is that a big scar on his shoulder? Is that a tattoo that's faded? That's hair. This is brute. Oh, hair on his shoulders. No, that's definitely the guy.

I like him. I like him. He seems like a good friend. He's a very funny guy. He seems like it. I mean, I will say, comedy is a way to open a lot of doors. Yes. If you're funny, it's a way.

it can be more entertaining than just being handsome and dull. Yeah, of course. You know this how? Because he's funny. And not handsome. Yeah, meager. Wow. Yeah.

That's a good point, though, man. I was never that guy and I was the guy in the circle of friends who were just like, yeah. Dude, we used to play some pretty hilarious games to, so like, it was part of rugby culture. That's definitely died out a lot lately because I'm pretty sure it's sexist, but didn't used to be considered that. And so we used to have like these games. And one of the games that we'd play was like a one-liner game. So if you're in your little nerd huddle and then I'd go to Patrick and be like, see that girl at the bar? You have to pick a girl, single group, whatever.

It doesn't matter. Yeah. You have to go to her. And then the game was like opening line. So you have to. I would give Patrick the opening line. So I'd be like, all right, Patrick, opening line is check out my ibis. And would you have to come with me or I go solo?

No, but you'd be on our system. He's dying. So well, Forrest died. Yeah. Honor system, but within ear shot to make sure it's happening. I honestly don't think that that's sexist. Like the animal? Like the bird.

Yeah. I mean, that one's pretty dumb. We would say things much more vulgar. But you just have to sit down next to the girl. And it's, oh, the vulgar things might be sexist.

I honestly don't think. It's just all in the delivery. Yeah, exactly. I know, because I had to do it 150 times. And if you go in, you're like, huh,

it's all in my ibis. She's like, ugh. If you're like, hey, it's all in my ibis. She's like, what?

You're like, How are you? I'm watching 90 day. I'm watching 90 day, right? And they have this guy on there who's never had a kiss. And it's the single life version of it. So he's out trying to find a woman. How old is this guy?

Like a male or a woman. I think he's like 26, maybe 28. Never kissed a woman in his life. Never kissed a woman, no. I'll tell you what. I could see how that could happen. He's morbidly obese. But, I mean, the fact of the matter is, is he got real.

No, on the show, it is though. And he got screwed last season. And he ended up being led on by some guy that was posing to be a woman for four years that he fell in love with. He got catfished. Catfished. And then, so they put him on this season to find a new mate. A mate. A mate. A mate. The difference. A wildlife show. That's right. The difference between like... He's a big horn sheep. A guy who is morbidly obese and has never encountered a woman in the wild

trying to talk to a woman. And like anybody who's talked to a woman before in their life or like has gotten laid once or twice is like insane, insane creep level for somebody who's not talked to a woman for the same thing, same words that could come out of a guy who has done this in the past say the same thing and it doesn't come off creepy. It has to do with like body language

and just, dude, you're effed. I don't know how. Well, yeah. Body language inflection. These are all things that are incredibly important. Right, but we don't focus on them. Like, if you could tell me a story and if I go, really? Then you know I'm interested. She don't ever tell me the same story and I go,

really. Then you know I'm doubting it and disinterested. He did that really well, didn't he? Really well. All right. Yeah, anyways, I just thought that was interesting. How did we get here? I don't know. I honestly can't. My fucking brain is like firing. The magic mind? It's the magic mind, dude. It's not fire. I don't know what's... I know. It gets me too. Mix it with some fat tire and you got a good work day.

All right, what else we got in the news? see what else is popping off. I love shit like this story. Shit like this story. This is good. What do you got? What do you got? NASA and Google Earth Engine have teamed up with researchers to help save tigers. Oh, that's nice. We're using technology to our advantage.

So, I love it. With less than 4,500 tigers remaining in the wild globally. Right. The whole world. That's all that's left. It's so crazy because they're like one of the most popular animals. It's one of the coolest. More of them in Texas than there are in the wild.

So they teamed up and they unveiled this TCL 3.0, which is a program that utilizes satellite imagery and a really advanced computer processing to monitor tiger habitats in real time. That's awesome. So if you're monitoring the habitat, you know, you can monitor poaching, like all sorts of shit like that. We talked about something similar that they were doing with AI training the AI. In a bonus pod last time. It's awesome when they do stuff like this. Sorry, go ahead. Yeah, I just, it's, I think it's really.

cool. No, but when they, I was, we said on the bonus pod, we were talking about how when they you, like, AI is scary, right? Everybody's scared that AI is going to take over the world and be Terminator situation. So it's good when these stories come out and remind us that like, oh no, we can actually do some good with this AI and like help these animals. Bonjour, compadre. It's the price line negotiator. How do I negotiate so many great travel deals? My greatest gadget. The price line app. It's got hotel deals. flight deals, rental car deals, all of those deals in a bundle, deals, game day deals, concert trip deals.

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I think it's basically going to be used to, like, identify problems. Yeah, makes sense. Like habitat loss, poaching. Looking for patterns. And then someone, human beings then still need to go do an action. For now, give it 10 years. True. Then the AI will figure out how to do it.

The robots will be out there in full force. Just sends a drone out that just kills the poacher. This is also in the news, but not relevant to the story. Did you see Joe Exotic's text the other day? Kyle, or sorry, not text, tweet or X or whatever it's called now. How's he tweeting from prison? You got to see this. You can have an iPad.

Where is it? So Joe Exotic, we, dude, I remember one of our first podcast No, just, Kyle, like, it's a headline. We, we had on the show as a guest, one of the cameraman that filmed the Joe Exhaught, the, uh, that's right. Joe Exotic show. Oh, yeah, I forgot about that. Yeah, that was, that was wild. And then all that shit happened with him.

He's now in jail for trying to murder Carol Baskin. Is that, that's right? Is that right? Is this it for us? That's right. No, exodus says he was, no. Okay. Uh, there, so his tweet says, he like, looks at Donald Trump.

and then goes on Twitter and goes, with a little bit of meth and a tiger, I could make that boy gay or something like that. Beautiful. Fucking hilarious, dude. And imagine just like putting that on Twitter. I don't know. It was so funny.

I was like rolling over laughing. It's great. Oh, no, it was Machine Gun Kelly, not Donald Trump. Oh, even more funny. Here it is. Here it is. A tiger and a little bit of meth and I can make Machine Gun Kelly gay. That's so good because he,

he's essentially like a cooler version of, Joe Exotic. What? Paining himself black? I think I'd rather hang out with Joe Exotic. Oh, definitely. What a mess. He's a great storyteller.

Here. I don't know, but I just saw this tweet and just thought it was so, like, imagine just waking up and me and like, yep, that's what I'm going to tweet. I mean, I think I know what he was saying, which is like, this is the kind of straight guy that I targeted. Yes, for sure. But he didn't say that. A little bit of meth.

He's had a little bit of meth and a tiger. Well, he's, you know, he's an expert storyteller Joe Exotic. He's an expert at getting into the limelight. He's an energetic. container, that's for sure. The funny part is that he has nothing to do with animals anymore. He's just now a guy in jail who does crazy shit. He's a mass. If that Netflix series had never come out, he would just be a guy in prison. I don't know if he would have been arrested. I mean, he might not have been arrested. I don't think he. Well, that's interesting. Weren't they in a legal battle in the, in the Netflix show? I think they were, but it had to do, it didn't have to do with like the murder of her. Actually, I, what did he get arrested for? Like, a murdering Carol Baskin.

No, no, because she's alive. He sent a hitman. He sent a hitman after her. He bought, he paid for a hitman. That's right. Which you can't do. Now you can't do. I swear to God, every time I hear about a hitman being hired, it's always like,

because that was an undercover cop and that person is now in jail. Did I ever tell you my hitman story? Of course not. Let's hear this. Forrest, I'm a stinky guy. My wife complains regularly that I don't shower enough. But guess what, dude? I'm 100% serious.

There is a new product called Mando. And this stuff lasts 72 hours, right? They sent me this starter pack with these wipes, this invisible cream, and this deodorant. I know you got it too because they sent us this stuff. Bro, it's amazing. I took it to Japan with me, and I think I told you I got really, really sick for a few days.

Yes. And I had this crazy fever where I was shivering and just pouring sweat out of every orifice of my body. And those wipes are the only thing that kept me from being like not completely and utterly repulsive. Like I'd literally shoot a scene, be like half dead and go like wipe down, face,

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That's 48 a year. That's right. Go to wild times. Dot club slash info. You can subscribe on Patreon. You can subscribe on Spotify. Do it on Spotify if that's where you listen to your podcast. Why would you do that?

What's the benefit? You could also listen to all of the podcasts ad free. Ad free. Huge. You know, that's how we got this cool studio. We love you guys. Thank you.

We love you. Just do it. Please. When we first moved to Santa Barbara, We rented this house. It was like a pretty small house from the neighbor, basically. Not where we are now. Not where I live. Not where Oprah lives. No, no, no. Just like up in the hills, whatever. Yeah. And the woman who, the landlord lived next door to us. Like if she owned two properties side by side and just fucking hated my mom. Like within six weeks was like sending like weird death threat notes and all of this really weird stuff. So we didn't live there very. long. We lived there for less, six months or something. Yeah. And then my mom was like, we got to move out. Like, this is really, really weird. And the woman refused to give back our security deposit. And so my mom, well, you didn't have much money at the time. So my mom went and got like a pro bono lawyer, like a pretty shitty pro bono lawyer.

Yeah. And won the security deposit thing, which was like 10 grand. It wasn't like a lot of, no, wasn't that. I was like, that was like, that's a lot. No, it was like five grand or something. I don't remember. This was like 15 years ago. Right. And, and then, you know, we won. She had to pay back the security deposit and blah, blah, we moved, never heard anything from her again. Like, oh, that was weird. I was a teenager this time. You know, like move, never heard anything from her again. One day the police show up. at our new house. This is over a year later. Yeah. Knock on the door. And they're like, hey, we wanted to check. Is everybody okay? And I'm like, yeah. What are you talking about? Yeah. And long story short, a man had turned himself in from Texas who had been hired by

our ex-neighbor to kill my mother. Holy shit. That's how much this woman fucking despised my mom. She offered some guy $30,000 to kill my mom. And the guy went straight to the police and was like, hey, this fucking crazy lady, just offered me money to kill this woman in California. And likely this happened after you guys had already left. This was over a year after, like probably two or three years after we moved out of that house.

So she hated your mom's nuts. Yeah. Nuts, nuts. That's what it was. Like so much so that the person she tried to hire was like a gardener or whatever and went straight to the police and was like, this is not right. So did she go to prison? No. Nothing happened to her.

Isn't that crazy? That is crazy. So, yeah, because it was all hearsay. There was no paperwork or whatever. So nothing happened to her. But I guess the police went there and like. you know, shook her up a little bit. It was like, what the fuck you're doing?

We know what you're doing, blah, blah, blah. Yeah. That was the end of it. Peter, what is our, when we talk about what a good night in a hotel room is, what, what is it? It's when we spent a night in the motel six. No, no. What is the thing that we talk about?

Oh, just like watching forensic files. Yes. You know, going to bed at seven, ordering a pizza, laying in bed, eating it. Not leaving the hotel room. Yeah, exactly. But there's been a million episodes of the show Forensic Files. Mm-hmm. And a lot of them are.

a husband or wife hiring a hitman to kill their spouse for insurance money. Absolutely. It's probably 80% of the episodes. Really? Yes. But it's often like 10 grand or less. Yeah. And these people all end up murdered because they're on a show about murders.

Right. But sometimes it's like five grand. Yeah. It's not a lot. And the other thing is, too, it's always, they do the show in such a way where it keeps you guessing as the audience. But in reality, the cost. Fops figured out right away that there was just a $150 life insurance policy taken out and that the spouse is the main suspect.

Yeah. The recently divorced been cheated on spouse sent somebody over. How could you think that you would get away with that? How? But it's so fucked up. It's like it's almost like the person who, like the murderer gets fucked, the hitman or hit woman. Yeah.

But then the person who hired them also gets the same. charge as they should. Yeah. Yeah. But I almost feel like they should get worse. They should. They should. No, they're not the hip man.

You know what's funny? The OG. And I'm not going to go into excruciating detail here. All you have to do is have a great understanding of biology. You don't have to fucking go hire a hip man. I can kill somebody. No, I'm serious. 25 different ways with natural plants,

venoms, things like that that I can find within a five mile radius of my house. Really? Good to know. Untraceable. Good to know. How much easier is that than hiring a hipman? hipman. Just learn biology. It's much easier.

Go to school for four years. Can you get rid of the body? What's that? Can you get rid of the body? Can you dispose of the body? Feed it to my pigs. All right. Well, we all know his plan. Yeah. There you go. Run Jess. Run, Jess.

What is the venom that you could collect within five miles of your house? There is no, well, I'd have to... The best thing right now, in fact, growing on my driveway are death caps, which is a... Mushroom up, a mushroom that I could put in anybody's food and they'd be dead in 48 hours. Jesus. Do these grow... And who's going to search for that? You know what I mean? The toxicology report's going to say poisoned.

Yeah. But it's not going to say what, you know what I mean? Like I, granted, I don't know that much about like how. Well, I like what you're doing here. You're making, I think this is a plea to your wife just to say like, hey, I just, I'm going to put this out there so that you know that I'm telling everybody. And if the kitchen isn't clean when I get home. Oh, my God.

I had, so I, I'm sure you guys are sick of hearing about it, but I've been going back and forth bunch between here in Colorado. had a lovely meal cooked for me a couple days ago. Oh, wow. With, it was elk. It was elk. Mm. Delicious.

Like, just like, in this, like, brown light sauce. And it was with these mushrooms. And the chef is German. And she has these mushrooms that grow in Germany imported. And she told me the name and I don't remember it. Oh, come on. Don't do that to me. I was like edge of my seat for the mushroom.

I feel like it began with an H. Kyle, Google, like. German mushroom delicacy. German mushroom delicacy. But dude, they were un. believable. Yeah. No, what, I don't understand what separates. I'd like to go into the nuance of the different, uh, those are just cremini. The different flavors or the different, maybe they have all the same mushrooms. What is it that differentiates these mushrooms to one another? I'm going to ask for us here because

oh, oh, flavor profiles are massive. Really? I feel like they all taste like dirt a little bit. Nah, dude. Kyle, when we, when we went mushroom hunting, I, I took Kyle mushroom hunting for the first time, I don't know, or early early in this winter. Okay. He'd never picked a mushroom in his life, correct? Correct. You picked, I don't know, you're mostly filming, but you picked, I don't know, what, two dozen Chantrells? Took home 10 pounds. Yep. How were those for you?

Delicious. Can you elaborate? Yeah, they're, I mean, they're mostly tastes like garlic and butter, but there's like, but, like, the texture is great. There's just like the undertones of the mushroom are just like there. And it tastes different than like the regular mushrooms. Kyle knows about the mushroom undertones. So, look, telling me. So look, he's got a tongue.

Every mushroom has a different flavor profile. Some are very bland. Porcini, those giant Mario-looking mushrooms, they don't do anything for me. They're fun to hunt because they're huge. When you find one, it's really exciting. But their flavor to me is very, very bland. You can cook them like a steak

so you get like a big old meaty thing. Right, like a portobello is kind of what that's for. But then you get chantrelles, which have this really like earthy flavor. You can get black trumpets that have that truffly-like flavor, like a really pungent thing. I mean, it's just, yeah, I think a kind of different flavor.

problem is that I haven't, I haven't eaten a diverse enough profile of mushrooms, to be honest with you. I've probably really only eaten like truffle and, and, and, what I just said, the big meaty ones that are at the store. Portabella. Portabella. And then the regular toadstool mushrooms or whatever they are. You've definitely not eaten those. But yeah, I hear you. I need to get some mushrooms from you, buddy. I'm happy, dude. My freezer's completely jam-packed. I'm coming over after this pod. Between our, uh, our friends giving trip and then Santa Barbara having just a bang in season, I have so many mushrooms. If you want mushrooms, I will bring you. You got any more, uh, any more, uh, four fun trips coming up, like to do adventure? No. You're like, no, I'm just working all year. I mean, even that,

like, we went foraging, but we sold all the mushrooms and stuff. I mean, which we didn't need to, but it was, you know, made some pocket money out of it. Nice. How much did you sell? 25 bucks a pound. Oh, wow. All right. I think we did, I don't know, 40 pounds or something. See, dude, let me have first dibs. I'll buy a pound for. No, just bring him to you. That's, I only started selling them because the freezer was so full. I'm in, baby. Bring him. Bring it. Bring them over. Yeah, I got you. No, my fun trips are usually, I didn't realize there's a pattern,

but I am realizing there's a pattern. I have a lot of fun from basically just before Thanksgiving until about. What's the difference between butter and butter made from real California dairy? It's the real California farm families behind it. Real people. Real care. Real intention. Why?

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from people who get beauty. Only at Sephora. Hi. Let's get you a basket. January 20th. Oh yeah. That's... Yeah. And then the rest of the year is completely slammed. That's literally like I feel like that is

what my life has been until I had kids. And now it's just like, they're still so young. It's a lot of work. But it was always like off work, like, doing doing fun things, maybe a trip, maybe go into a few parties at people's house for Christmas holiday parties. And then, boom, back into work.

Everybody's like, yeah, we've been off. Let's go. Let's tear it up. I think my mic sounds weird. You're weird. Maybe it's my ears. I also think we should play a game. Oh, yeah. I have a game.

I have one. You have one? You've stored it up. Bizarre animal of the week. Oh. An old school game. A favorite. That's right.

How bizarre? How bizarre. How does this game work? All right, this is Bizarre Animal the Week. By way, I don't know if I've ever heard that jingle before. No, I don't, I've ever heard it. You know what's kind of cool, too? Do you know what that first sound is? Sound effect?

No. We're definitely going to get copyright infringement. That is, uh, that is, uh, octanauts. Octanots? You don't know octonots? No. You don't know octonauts? It's a cartoon.

I know that. Dude, it's phenomenal. I've learned so much on octanauts. My son watches it on that. Wait, is this one? I think we talked about this one time. You were suggested it for the kids. They're a little underwater adventurers and they like solve problems like, oh, there's a seal can stuck in a cave.

Listen, I love it. I love any kind of kids show that teaches me things. It's great. It's really good. Anybody, like adults can watch it. It's pretty solid. I want to know about this bizarre animal. Tell me.

How does the game work? The game works like this. I am going to give you some clues as I give you those clues. You're going to narrow in and guess what the bizarre animal of the week is. I've never gotten one right. So the Browsoners have hit me up personally on Instagram and said, can you please bring this back? It's fun to play along.

I always get it before you. They say that? Yeah, of course, because they know more. They're cocky. They know how to get your attention. We've got the smartest audience of any podcast. That's a fact. That's a fact.

All right, here we go. Clue number one. This animal is a master of camouflage blending seamlessly with its surroundings. So we know it's a good thinking. So I'm just telling you what I'm thinking. This is like you're showing your work in chemistry. That's how this works. I'm thinking cephalopod, but I don't have enough information to know which one yet.

I'm thinking either cephalopod or chameleon. Good. These are big words that you didn't know four years ago. It's pronounced chamelon. Oh, yes. Don't like Kyle read it out loud. All right. Dinosaur muscle.

All right. So we've got a good camouflaging animal. Clue number two. This is where it starts to get fun. Okay. It possesses a long and segmented body. Oh, this has got to be in the lizard world. I'm going still chamele.

in, uh... Oh, actually, no, it doesn't have yet. Okay, I think he's not done with his clue. Oh, shit. But its true nature is often hidden. It possesses a long and segmented body, but its true nature is often. Okay, I'm now thinking something in the centipede millipede world. Ooh, see, you're thinking.

I don't have enough information. Lots of segments. You know what it is? What is it? I know what it is. Say it. It's the leaf bug. Also a good guess.

But you're both wrong. Let's keep going. So our master of camouflage. with a long segmented body. Yeah. Oh, sorry, I was just pausing for suspense. Our master of camouflage with a long segmented body

is a skilled predator. A skilled predator using its sharp hidden appendages for hunting. Hidden appendages. Uh-huh. Hidden appendages.

That makes me feel like it's in the water. I'm going kind of back to water also, yeah. All right, keep going. Keep going. What else does it do? Give us bullet point number four. Bullet point number four is it remains largely concealed in substrate, waiting patiently for prey to approach.

Ambush predator. Because Forest said substrate. Yeah, yeah, I agree. It doesn't mean it's... The bottom of the ocean. Just a dirt, huck out. Yeah. Bottom of the ocean. Don't, don't you fucking try to. So this is, you know, right now in my head, you can picture all those animals that come and snap up. Yeah, they go. You see the water go, yeah, dad. What's that fish that literally goes, yeah dead after it eats down? Oh, that's the you dead fish. Obviously you're dead. Yeah. Okay.

All right. Nope. Nothing yet. All right. So long segmented, very well camouflaged ambush predator. Mm-hmm. That is also swift and powerful when striking. Oh.

Yeah. Is it a mantis shrimp? Good guess. Really good guess. But it's not. I legit. Because it's not really camouflaged, right? It's very colorful.

Yeah, that's true. Okay. Well, I'm legit going back to Cephala pot. I'm going to some kind of octopus right here because I know I've seen. Which kind, though. I don't know. But it's an octopalized. a push of some type.

Well, I could rule that out by telling you it's got extremely sharp jaws. Son of a bitch! That's your next clue. It's got... It's got... It's got... It's got... It's not a shrimp.

Oh! Go ahead. A trapdoor spider. Good guess. Really good guess, but no. That was a really good guess. I was positive. I'm sure...

It's not segmented, though. A spider? I don't know. I guess it has three segments, doesn't it? Can I do one more guess? Yes, of course. Piston? Pistol shrimp? Pistol shrimp? No, it's really good guesses. You guys are narrowing in, by the way.

Okay. You are narrowing in. It's some kind of crissue. You should have never said substrate, boy. I know, that was a mistake. All right. What if I told you that this creature lived in the tropical and the tropical and all? Does that help narrow it in all? Nah, I'm bad at geography. Okay. Well, what if I had one more clue? Go ahead. It's a marine organism. I already knew that tropical marine. Well, he was still saying leaf bug and stuff. Oh, and trapdoor spider. Trapdoor spider. Those are really good guesses, but it's not right. This has got to be an octopus. I'm going to go with a blue-ringed octopus. I'm going to go with the...

It's called Stellars. He defaults to Stellars anytime he's out of ideas. Stellars. Tropical cuttlefish. Yeah. That's a good guess. It's not a real creature. Especially because Stellar was an Arctic explorer.

I'm well aware. Is the sea cow named after him? Yeah. As is the sea ape. Okay. Well, I've got one more clue for you. It's a big, drum roll. Big clue here.

Here we go. It's a worm. That's not the answer because there's lots of kinds of worm. Okay. This marine creature. Sharp jaws. It's a worm. It's a worm.

I don't know a whole lot of types of worms. No, it sounds terrifying too. Okay, how about this? Can I give you one more clue or for the broosters? Yes. Movie Dune. You've been seeing it? Yep.

Yeah, seeing all the trailers for Dune 2. very inspired by that. Yeah, yeah. Tremor, the tremor creature? Pretty much. What is it called? What is it called? It's a sea worm.

Ladies and gentlemen, what is it? You haven't guessed it by now. Here we go. Our large, segmented deep sea or sea substrate dwelling ambush predator with incredibly sharp jaws that is a master of camouflage found in tropical regions is the bobbet worm. Ah, the bobbet worm. Look at that thing, dude.

where Lorena Bobbitt got her last name? Exactly. That's a fact. She was named. She named the Bobbit worm. They knew that she was going to cut someone's Hogan off. Yeah. So these things are, how big is a Bobbit worm? They're big, right? I have no idea. Big as the beer bottle? No, because it's not saying you ever see reference to it. I think they get pretty big.

I think they do get like 12. That's terrifying. If it gets that big, that is terrifying. But can I have to do it with the girth part? You could have just done the leg. You didn't have to add the dildoey girth part. Well, listen, I, I'd like to, I'd like to. I'm gonna, you know, this is probably gonna be a little off topic, but I tried to, I've been trying to find a new book to listen to. Okay. And I've listened to two really great books and, uh, sci-fi books.

One was still alive as authored by and read by Forrest Glythe. No, no, no. Hyperion series and then I read the three-body problem, which is coming out on Netflix, was amazing, sci-fi stuff. Okay. I tried to read Dune because that was like what good reads recommended to me and everybody said it was good. And I listened to this book for like six hours and I've been, I was born, I was, bored out of my mind the whole fucking time. Oh, that's interesting. What is wrong with me? People say that this is one of the best

sci-fi books in existence. I've heard from two different people. It's the greatest sci-fi book ever written. I gotta give it another try. Yeah, I mean, let us know, weigh in in the comments. With an audiobook, I imagine if you don't like the narrator, that could easily do you in. Dude, it's so huge. The narrator is so big. I kind of thinking about this. Kyle, can you please look up a big of Bobbitt Warmer. It's only, it's like, I can't stop thinking of it. I'm like having a bit of an anxiety that I don't know the answer. The forest isn't typically fidgety, and I see him over. over there like,

Yeah, it was driving me nuts because I just, I've never really considered how big this is. So, that is absolutely where they got. He's on Google images instead of just Googling it. Yeah.

But this is absolutely where they got the insane. The monster. Ten feet. Gets up to 10 feet long. Get out of here. What's the girth? Four inches.

Four inches. A couple inches wide. This is absolutely. Up to 10 feet long. That's huge. Bro, this is absolutely where they got the monster from tremors from. I told you.

Yeah, it is. Yeah, I mean, dude, think about how much that thing will need to eat. Oh, I know where I saw these. There was a saga on Reddit in like the aquarium subreddit where these things will invade your aquarium and they're like impossible to get out. Oh, that's interesting. Yeah, you have to like, basically, and they kill all your fish. Look at how this guy is like capturing this one. So he put a clamp on its head. They're really hard to get out. Yeah. Look at that though. Did you see that's a backup, Kyle? This guy puts a clamp on a. its head and then just puts, so see that, he clamps onto it. Yeah. And then he puts a water bottle filled with air so that there's constant up pressure on a string.

Yeah. And it's just slowly, basically every time the worm wiggles at all, it comes looser a little bit. These are borrowing, you know, they're like in and out of the reef and the sand and whatnot. Dude, I'm telling you, it's a very famous saga on Reddit about some guy. I just don't believe it because a bobbot worm didn't come. in through the fucking foundation of the house. No, I'm telling you it's a common thing. It could be in the rock that was gotten from the ocean

or just a baby one was in there. Because their larvae are probably tiny. And it's either in like fish poop or in a piece of coral that you buy. The amount of controversy on this post because people who have aquariums are so averse to these bobbet worms because they're so fucking difficult

to get out of your aquarium. And they kill your fish. They literally kill your fish. Yeah, yeah. Well, couldn't you just quickly relocate your fish that you like and then just get rid of that other aquarium. So I had a saltwater aquarium. I'm sure Forest has. The thing that is really annoying with them is that the rocks that are in them and the water that is in them, the ecosystem is built up

in these rocks. It's a lot of live rocks and the water. And so it's like, say you have, you've been building up an aquarium for two years. You have great rocks, keeps the whole environment filtered and great and the water. And then a bobbit. worm somehow gets introduced or grows up in there. Now, like, you have to take all the fish out and transfer it, you lose all the fucking the shit you've built up over two years. Or the organic material that makes the ecosystem healthy. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Saltwater aquariums are a nightmare. And when they're in like a nice space of homeostasis where everything works, it's like such a pain in the ass to touch anything at all. Oh, right. Well, dude, I remember I had a...

It's so cool to look at though. Oh, my God. I remember I had a saltwater aquarium back in Chicago before I only had a few simple fish. You heard that, right? I had a salt water aquarium back in Chicago. I was about to ask you if you heard the way he said Chicago. Yeah. Only in a few. So, but I guess now I forgot I was going to say.

No, but. You went deep Chicago when you said that. I had a salt water aquarium. You're a monster. And I only had a few simple fish in there. Like a clown fish. I had a, uh, the, the, the, the, damn and I can't remember the name of it. But it's like the most common aggressive saltwater fish to get,

a tank started. They're like Petra? No, no, they're black striped, black and silver. Anyways, I had one of those and then like a clownfish and like a tang in there, right? And dude, I would just get stoned and I would sit in front of

that tank at nighttime and I would just look at this thing, man, and I was like, I'd sit there for like an hour and a half just sitting there smoking every once in a while. Yeah, glowing water is fascinating. I'm going to send you a video of my baby who you put in the

high chair in front of the turtle tank in my living room. Two hours. He won't say anything. That's amazing. What a life It's like TV. You just turn it on and it's good TV. He's just watching turtles swim back. It's real life. We're having a pool put in. Oh, are you moving forward with that? Yeah. A $200,000

pool. That's not how much it costs. Well, no, I'm not saying you're rich. I'm just saying that it's absurd how much shit costs. We're having a pool built. And so, my, my, the designer was like Do you want just white lights under the water? Yeah. Or do you want colored lights?

Like where you can change the colors of each light from your phone. It's a no-brainer. Yeah. It's a no-brainer. I was like obviously color because it's an extra $1,000. It ends up being $4,000 more. Gotcha. Wow.

For the colored lights? A thousand each. Wow. Okay. But I'm like, yeah, we have to put colored lights in. My wife's like, no, no, let's just say that money. No, she's crazy. I'm like, I just want to sit in a chair and stare at glowing water.

Yeah, purple, blue, green. Maybe I'm in a purple mood today. Maybe I'm in a fucking red mood. You angry, you go red. If you feel mellow, turn the blue on. Exactly. That was a non-star. Plus, I like the idea of me sitting there alone.

Blu-toothing your pool. Sneaking booze. Yeah, of course. And just changing the color from my phone. I want to do it. But also, guys, I think it's time. What do you got? What's going on?

I think I know what time it is. That's forest cool. I don't know right there. time. What? I hope you got one. I do. Okay, thank God.

It was submitted by someone, but Edwin cut off the name of who submitted it. But I like this near and dear to my heart. Okay, let's have it. Florida, do you have a problem with invasive species? Oh, no. Florida? Yeah, just a little one. A little one.

Chat GPT for help. So, we're each tasked with salt. We're the new czar of invasive herpes in the Florida Everglades. All herpes are invasive. Describe the Evergives. Because Peter doesn't know what it is for us. No, no, no. Let me, he's coughing.

The Everglades is this very, very, it's like the utmost survivalist place in America. It's a jungle and it is full of marshes and dangerous animals. I don't think he said one thing correctly. Marshes was close. It's the largest wetland in North America. That's all you need to say. From the sawgrass to the seagrass, baby. Let's go.

All right. So you're the news are. you're the invasive Herpsar. You've got to get rid of the invasive pythons, the Tagu. They're fucking things up, man. Python. So to do this, you're going to unleash an army that we have created in our labs here at the Battle Royal headquarters. Nice.

BR HQ. You got to take the head, the body. So what we're going to do is head, body and legs together. Yep. And a special power from the animal kingdom. Okay. To create the ultimate invasive herp. Hunter.

Love it. To get rid of them all. It's just one. We're just one. We're each going to make one. We're each making one. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Right.

Okay, got it. But you're going to, whichever one you make, you're going to have an army of them. Love it. Several hundred. Got it. Understood. Okay. Yeah.

Peter, put your phone down. No, no, no, no. I need help with this. I don't know any of these animals. People who watch this on YouTube love seeing people on their phones. Yeah. St. It's basically watching the Cardacians.

All right. You go first for us. Sure. All right. I'm going to take a real nice one off the table. Early, I'm going to start with my superpower. Okay. Sniffer of a bloodhound.

Great. Yep. Now, why did you take that? Absolutely unbelievable scent receptors. You can train them to have a smell of a Burmese Python, have a smell of a tegou, have a smell of a chameleon, and go, go find them, boy. Yes, so you want that superpower. That's superpower. I need that power of scent.

So I am also going to start with superpower. and it's also going to be the smelling ability, the sniffer. But I'm going to take the sniffer of a brown bear because a brown bear has 10 times better smell than a bloodhound. Does it really? Yeah. Oh, that's annoying. You can still win.

I mean, it doesn't mean that you're next to. You just like you just used $1.00. Dup me on prices, right? I sure did. So what I like here about the fact that I'm using chat cheap to help me. Chachee. People understand that it's not me, but I think they want to hear the, uh, the, uh, the, AI's answer.

They do. I actually think you should do this every time. I agree, especially when I, you know, I'm just, I have no expertise when you're hammered. So do I have two as a snake draft right now? Same as the other 200. Yep.

This is the first time that that hasn't been the case. We're going to go with the head of an American alligator because they possess a keen sense of smell and night vision crucial for detecting prey in the dark murky waters of the airways. Are they known for their sense of smell? Nope.

Okay. Sure aren't. Well, then. And its powerful jaws and sharp teeth can crush turtle shells, making it adept at capturing a wide range of prey. Which if there were any invasive turtles there would be useful. That would be huge. Okay. So what would be next?

Shut your fucking butt. Head of an American alligator. And then the body. Now, this is actually a good one. This is what got me excited about this. Because even I know this is a good one. Scales up to the size of the body. This is the body of a Florida panther.

Right. You realize that whatever prompt you use, you're just using native Florida animals. Shut your butt. The body of a Florida. Florida Panther offers agility, stealth, and strength. This predator is well adapted to the Everglades. That's right, because it already lives there. Capable of moving silently through various terrains.

Good job, Peter. So you've got the Panthers' body and legs and size and an alligator's head on it. That's right. Chomp, chomp, chomp, chomp. Yeah. That's amazing. Shut your butt. No, that's really great.

Thank you, AI. Okay. Ah, watch your feet. Sorry, my knee. I thought my knee just fell out. Christ. All right. All right.

So I've got the smelling ability of a brown bear. Then I'm going to give it. I'm going to go ahead. I don't want a big ferocious head. I'm going to give it the head of a white shark. Ooh. Yeah. Just capable of finding a nesting ball of pythons and just scooping up the whole ball at once.

I want the big fucking jaws in the teeth. Okay. Nice. I keep trying to say better special ability to chat BT. I'm sorry. And it keeps auto correcting to... better scrotum ability. That's how much you type scrotum in your dog.

It's really weird. All right. Well, I'm up next for two, and I am going to start with the body, and everything scales up to the body, of the harpy eagle. Oh, wow. I want the ability of flight.

Smart. I want to be able to cruise long distances. Very smart. Have those giant talons that are so intimidating. Okay. And then I have the scent of a bloodhound. Mm-hmm. And so I just,

I need some. then I need something devilish. Oh, those talons are going to be nice, too. Yeah, they're real nice. Think here. Let's just think for a second. We're going to go with the head of a mamba. Wow.

Highly venomous mamba. So it just comes in, quick bite moves on. Doesn't matter if it's biting. Just leaves the carcass. It's dead. Yep. And moving on. It doesn't matter.

It's quick. It's aggressive. The head's small, so it flies nicely with the body. It doesn't matter if it doesn't have to spend a lot of time dealing with fighting something comes in either hits them with the talem nails them with the bite moves on so i mean this thing is gonna fuck things up i mean it can smell everything flying around great vision yep oh boy and venom yep that's it's pretty good that's a cool creature all right i don't

think i've won a battle royale two years so it's been a while is it your turn yeah so okay i've got my white shark head i need i don't want to sacrifice the joss that i don't want to sacrifice the joss that I'm really picturing it scooping up a whole, yeah, you know. So I need a big body that's capable of moving through this terrain. Okay. And I'm not going to copy Forest here. I don't do that. And I can't take your panther body.

That's right. So this is, this is a- Just take a jaguar. It's basically the same thing. Do whatever you do. No, I know what you do. You're both going to lose after. I'm going to take the body.

Give my next pick. I'm taking the body and the size and the ability to swim and traverse land. of a polar bear. Get the fuck out of here. Clause. He's going to be to be toasty in the glades. I didn't. We'll shave them.

We'll shave them down. Yeah, I was going to shave them down. Oh, yeah, that's good. That actually messes up my final pick, which I thought was the nail in the coffin for you too. I had to go through various rounds of explaining what I want to the Jet GPT, but after the third try for special ability. Oh for three.

On saying chat GPT. After the third, after the third try, it finally gave me, and this was so I actually might have used this myself. the special ability of an electric eel. When you motherfuckers bite my leopard size... We're not fighting. Trying to bite you. Yeah.

What are you trying to do? Eradicate invasive species. Maybe this is why this happened. Oh, it is. If I would have added that tagline to the... Oh, he built... What did you think we were doing this whole time? I thought we were fighting all, as usual.

That's what a battle royale is. It's very... It's very ridiculous. I'm so annoyed. Every battle royale should be a fight to the death. By the way, agree or not? If you could just reframe that as... of an idiot and just be like, and then I can electrocute giant portions of snakes and

taggues and everything else. It's actually a pretty good animal. I think you just did it for me. That's why I'm a, that's why you're the host of the podcast. There we go. Nicely done. All right, guys, so, uh, wait, we need people to vote. Yeah. Brosner's way and let us know who won. Was it my harpy eagle with a black mamba head and the scent of a bloodhound? Patrick's scent abilities of an Alaskan brown bear on the body of a polar bear with the head of a great white shark. I don't like whatever's going on over there. Let's just keep going. Or Peter's Gator-headed

Panther that had electric eel abilities. Way in, let us know whose army of critters you think would eradicate the most invasive species or what you're a perfect animal. I think I came in last because even though I came right out of the gates and won up to you, big time. I used two bears. That's bullshit. You did choose two bears. That was questionable. Speaking of bears. I didn't realize it until I set it back.

Why? Speaking of bears, I've got the world. The world's hottest gummy bear right here. Our friend Andy, lovable, lovable. I'm going to give you. Oh, from AnimalCon? Yeah, that's right. Andy Gabbard.

I don't want your fingers on mine. Just pass me one over here. We're going to each put this in our mouths. No, I'm not. Yes, you are. He said that you would be the only one that doesn't do it. So don't let him be right. This is the world's hottest gummy bear called Lil Nitro.

He sent this to us months ago. Can't we make Kyle do this? Isn't that what we pay Kyle for? your mouth. No, I don't. I don't do these. Yes, you do. I don't do what I'm told. Just put it in there, chew on it a little bit. You can spit it out if you want. I'm going to see your reaction. I'm trying it. What a pussy. Kyle, get over here. Let's go. No, no, get over here. I'm busy. Not, I'm busy. Are you going to pop the whole bear in? Yeah, we're going to eat. Kyle, come over. I'm busy. No, no, you got to come over here. Stop it. Peter's got a thing. Peter's got a thing. Meager little creepola. What a meathead jerk you are.

Go sit down at the producer station where you belong. Just because someone that we met. at AnimalCon sends an item and goes, chew on this, it'll be torturous. Andy Gabarn. No, thanks. So I think all the brocers should learn a lesson from me. Get over here. Get over here. Kyle's running away. Are you eating it?

I'm gonna eat it. Are you chewing it? No, I'm sucking hot. Holy shit, it's not good. That are broke. How hot is it? It's pretty hot. It has warnings on it.

It's not that bad. It's just cayenne. You can kind of tell it's just cayenne. I think if you chew it it would be a lot worse. It's extremely spicy. He has potential to cause. Did you spit it out? Yeah.

It has potential to cause skin irritation if touched. Shut up. Let's do the outro because I can't give it to my mouth that too much longer. I got to get a drink. Wildimes. Dot club for slash info. Go get all the bonus pods. Spit it out, boy.

Now, keep it in there. All the bonus pods. No ads. Add free. All the pods are ad free. Go to Wild Times. com. Forward slash info.

And you know what? If you've listened this far. He's hiccuping. If you've listened this far. This is ridiculous. write in, Pat is meager. If I were you, I would write in Wild Timeshoc Club forward slash you

Patrick's the only one with half a fucking brain in his nut. Good night. Jesus. Oh my God. How hot is it? It's the hottest thing I've ever eaten, actually. Oh, God. Seriously?

Yeah. And I didn't bite into it. I just sucked on it. There's a warning that says, don't let children touch it. It's going to be bad for a long time. A rash. It's going to be bad for hours. It's not, it's weird because it's not like, You know when you eat something, you start crying and sweating?

It's not like that. Just my fucking mouth hurts. Dude, my tongue hurts. Well, keep in mind, it says this may cause skin irritation in your mouth. It's doing that right now. It literally says consume at your own risk. We need a milk around. Oh, dude.

This is bad. Are you still eating it? You're still rolling, right, Kyle? This is bad. I'm sorry that this happened to you. This hurts really bad. Are you still eating it? This hurts really bad.

He's still eating it. No, I went to go to La Croy. Did I get a boba tea earlier? Can I have that please? Can I have my coffee? It's got cream in it. Yeah. You are the only smart one.

I always given it peer pressure so quickly. See, like something like when you brought the smelling salts, like I'm like, okay, this isn't going to 15 seconds, right, 20 seconds. But like, I don't like that shit. You know, I'd like to defend the position. It was really he just said he knew Pat wouldn't do it. And I just wanted to prove him wrong. Who looks smart right now? Kyle looks smart.

And Pat. Pop a pee. Big win. There's no way I was doing that. I don't do these things. If you know you don't like something, why are you doing it? Look at him. Look at Peter.

He's in agony. I'm actually, I'm not even happy that I touch the box. It's pretty unpleasant. One to ten, how much did it make your mouth hurt? It was a seven for a shorter period of time than when I've tried to eat like really spicy in the inner Thai food. Okay. I mean, I can still hear that your throat's a bit irritated. Yeah.

No, it's an awful, awful feeling. Look at Peter. You should have to do a bonus pie. Peter's still eating it, by the way. Why are you doing this? It's better than a sigh. Check your pulse. You might be having a heart attack.

It's 210 right now. Yeah, I'm good. We can, I already did the outro. I hope you're still filming. We're leaving all this in. Can you zoom in? Do you have zoom power on them? Zoom in on his face.

What are you drinking? Coffee with cream. Can you sing the national anthem? Oh, sick. Can you see? It's pretty good. It's actually nice. Yeah, it's nice.

Thanks for doing much. By the dawn's early light. It's like Chris Stapleton. Is the, is the, coming in your mouth? No. What's so prolly? Did you try chewing it? I did.

I took a couple of shoes. Why? Look at the tears forming on his eyelid. I don't know, man. Say no to peer pressure, folks. Try to kill suicides instead. Good night. Yeah.

Good night, everybody. Stop. Oh, shit. Sorry. All right. You're bawling. You're literally bawling. Not easy.

Holy shit. As great as I am. It looked like you just found out someone died. Yeah.