Wild Times: Wildlife Education - TWT #65 - IN STUDIO PREMIERE!

Episode Date: July 6, 2021

In-person chemistry is back as The Wild Times crew make a home in their new studio! Still some work to do on lighting and cameras, but you're here for the banter anyways, right? 😂 Special thanks to our Patrons who make the studio possible. We love you! Patreon @ https://patreon.com/wildtimespod Merch @ https://shop.thewildtimespodcast.com Discord @ https://discord.com/invite/zzTxnrHnS8 All the link @ https://thewildtimespodcast.com/info

Wild Time. Said we were going to do it. Yes. We are doing it. Episode number 64. Look at the screen behind me. Look at the cameras over there. Welcome, Brosner's, ladies and gentlemen, old listeners.

This is the Wild Times in the studio, as we promised, coming at you with a live podcast. So excited. Yeah. No headphones. No headphones. Sitting in the same room. No delay. No bullshit software.

Just fucking white claws. clawing it up with two of my best spots. Oh, what's that? What is that? Oh, there's nothing in the gloves. Oh, all right. I'm switching the camera live, so if it's fucked up, hey, it's fucked up.

All right, bro,sters, listen now. We said we were going to do it. We're doing it, babe. We're doing it. We are here. We're in the studio. Welcome to the new home of the Wild Times podcast, the greatest show on air that talks about wildlife, adventure, sports,

in general whodunnitness and shenanery. A lot of boo. We talk about booze and drinks because we're usually doing that. Yeah, yeah, we do some drinking. A little funny. If this is your first time tuning in, good job. You probably shouldn't have watched the other 63 because they were just us sitting at our computers,

except for two of them. Yeah, two. We did two in person. We did two in person. Probably the two best ones. The whole plan. We're doing it for real. If you don't know me,

I am your host, the broologist, Forrest Galante from Animal Planet Extincter Alive. Amen. Joining me today is the one and only retep. Oh, I switched to me. You switch? Right here, yeah, baby. I'm doing it all. The Brofessor. How are you, Retepe?

I'm good, man. Long day. Fucking got in here. All the equipment together over the past week, got this studio set up, and we thought we would have to be set up at an hour. It's been seven hours. 6.02 p.m. starting the pod. All right. We're just beginning to get hammered and record several podcasts. Cheers, mates. Beautiful. That's the Brofesser. And the one, the only, the producer, extraordinary. Papa P.

What's going on, Patrick? How excited are you to be in the studio? Dude, just the difference is night and day. I mean, fucking hell. You know, it was a lot of fun doing it for the last 60 weeks during COVID quarantine and all that. It was social. Yeah. Oh, yeah.

This is so much better. So much better. So much better. You know what's interesting? Yeah. Everybody did what we were doing. Do you know what I mean? Everybody got on it.

I remember at the beginning of COVID, it was like, oh, we're going to do Zoom dates with our friends. Yeah. Oh, yeah. You'd go and do a Zoom day with your friend. I did two of those. Hated them. I love my friends. I love them.

They're great. But I don't want to sit on Zoom and hear about their week. And the problem is that everyone's talking over each other. Right. It's a nightmare. Listen, and like, I didn't even realize this.

But when you're doing a podcast, like, we have a mission to, like, kind of entertain. And it's hard to turn that off when you're with your friends. So you either just shut the fuck up. And, like, then if you start getting into, like, a story,

like, oh, it's too podcasty. I need to shut up. like my girlfriend literally my girlfriend literally goes like you're not on the fucking podcast like all the time whenever like i get excited about something i'm like i'm just excited that is how i am normally it's not a podcast voice that's how i get when i'm excited you're an excitable guy i have a huge boner right now you guys can't see it you get excited a lot yeah you know what give me one oh man you have two you have two cans in front of you sir drank They're drunk. They're supposed to be... Okay, calm down.

Calm down. All right, everybody. Cheers. First official podcast in the news studio. It's the real deal. Thank you to our patrons, who are the reason that we were able to get this studio. They're called patrons. Patrons.

Patrons. But nothing's changed. We're just in the same room. It's the same show. Same room. It'd be funny if we found out that none of the listeners gave a shit that were in the same room. They hate it. Yeah.

Also, we hate it. We're like, Dude, this sucks. Let's go back to video calls. Those are great. Yeah, yeah. Forrest, what have you got fucking loaded up in that show dock? Oh, by the way, let's address the elephant in the room. Will is not here, but he will be back.

He's still driving across the country. He made an amazing show dog. This is, by the way, the longest cross-country. Will's been driving across the country for a month. I've been to five countries in the time. I drove from California to New York with my dog in three and a half days. Right. Will's been driving from New York to Boulder.

He's very good looking. He has to stop and take pictures. with Asian tourists constantly. I imagine that's exactly what's going on. They think he's famous. All right, so. All right, guys. You know, this is a show where we come together in person.

CUM. Yeah. We talk about what's going on in the wildlife world, in the adventure space, all kinds of fun stuff. We get messages from you guys, the brosners, the listeners. But one of the things that I like to do is talk about what's in the news. What's in the news? So I had to dig right into this.

Yeah. It's too crazy. to not discuss it. Uh-huh. Yeah. I know where you're going with this. You do, you do for sure. Ever had a little Maccafee

computer antivirus? Yeah, like that was like the original antivirus that used to run under a shitty desktop when you were in high school. Ask that question to the tech guy. You're the tech guy. John McAfee had an antivirus software that was called McAfee Anivirus.

Everybody hates it and it acts like a virus. Okay. Well, John McAfee, I didn't know this. I've heard the name, you know, He's an eccentric weirdo. I didn't know that much about him. Deep dive time, okay? John McAvey, eccentric weirdo, super crazy.

He's had a wildlife, right? He died this week, actually. Yep, he killed himself in Spanish jail. Supposedly. Supposedly. Right. But right after killing himself in Spanish jail, a story surfaced about a sport that he was playing.

Take a guess. Baseball. Baseball. Spain. Rugby. Oh, Spain. Soccer. Soccer.

You know, maybe maybe maybe maybe. Maybe it's in Spain, but it's not that. What was it? Nope. It's whale fucking. What? That's a sport? Apparently.

So, John McAfee would go to the Maliki Channel and he would swim out in a competition mode, supposedly, to see who could put their dick inside of a whale's blowhole for the longest. And the record he apparently held at 31 seconds. Nah, it's, yeah. This is a real story. I believe that it's a story. Have you been to Molokai? It's one of the Hawaiian islands. It's supposed to be like the most, I think the most remote island.

They don't have as much tourism. Here's a few of the issues I have with this. You're swimming out into a channel that's deep enough. He claims to have stuck his penis for 31 seconds and a humpback whales blowhole. Yeah. So water that's deep enough for humpbacks to cruise through, probably going to be a little choppy.

Yep. And he's sweat. And you're swimming. So you're already doing something. Yep. Yeah. And he was fully erect. Fully erect.

Do you think you could even get a full erection while swimming in ocean water? I can't even pee while swimming. I was just going to say. I tried to like actively. You have to stop swimming and float and go. Okay. And then you start. A hundred percent.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. If you, you can't just pee while you're swimming. Well, this guy, I mean, I've read about some of his bullshit. He's insane, first of all. Literally, there's, uh,

photo video of him just blowing bowls of coke. I mean, I swear to God, like the guy's a known lunatic. And I don't believe for one second that this is a true story. It's in the news. And if it's on the internet, you know it's true. Okay, so Forrest, your knowledge, okay, first of all, should you penetrate a whale's blowhole? Absolutely 100%. It's the right thing to do for science.

You are supposed to do that. Yes, yes, yeah. Understood. So let's assume that nobody should be doing this. The whale needs that blowhole, don't they kind of need it when they're at the surface? And I, you know, like, I'm pretty sure that's not going to block it up, block it up, but I still don't think you should be trying to get on top of a whale and put anything inside of its bowl. But let's say you did.

Okay, how would you even get on top of a whale? You're a really good swimmer. I am. Do you think you could mount a whale and get on top of its blowhole? No. Okay. No. So I am.

I've been in the water with whales a lot. I'm a very good swimmer. with my free dive fins on and with a humpback whale coming up, I think I could absolutely get on top of it for maybe a second before rolling off. Okay. You know what I mean? Like charge on top of it. Yeah, yeah. Like scrabble up it kind of. Yeah. Yeah. Like maybe

you know, like it's coming up. You time it so that you're underneath it. You know, I think I could do it. Could I touch one? Absolutely. Could I get on top of one for a brief second? Yes. For 31 seconds. Could I put my phallus inside of one for 31 seconds? Proposterous. Okay. I have... I have two statements. to make. Number one, Forrest, talk into the mic. And number two, what is the diameter of a whale's blowhole?

I don't know the answer to that. I mean, they're big, though. Yes. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. No, it's, I don't know the exact diameter, but yeah. So what are you, what would you even be, so you're just, you're basically, he's saying that he's hugging a hump back. That's what he's saying.

That's what he did. No boner. The blowhole of a whale acts like your butt. Like, it closes and opens, or like your mouth or whatever. You know what I mean? It's not just an open hole. It shut. Okay.

Yeah, they shut it, and then they open it and breathe and shut it again. Yeah. So, again, to discredit the story even further, you would have to time it so that the whale was up on the surface, actively choosing to open its blowhole while you happen to be mounting it. Yeah. I don't think so. That would be like, that would be as if Pat was actively mounting me and I just allowed him to enter my anus. You just opened your mouth. You just like.

Yeah, my mouth. Oh, no. It's in my mouth. So they're saying a humpback whales blowhole could be anywhere from like three to ten inches in diameter. Okay. So it's quite large. We're calling bullshit on McAfee. Yeah.

And a penis, a human penis is about what? Two millimeter? I don't. I don't. Let's not make it all dick talk. That's so early. All right. What else is in the news then if we want to get away from the dick?

No, I mean, I think we can still discuss this. We just don't have to have nothing but dick talk is what I was just wondering what the diameter of a whale's blowhole is. I didn't say anything about it. A blue whale up to 20 inches in diameter. So we're talking. That's fucking massive. But think about how much oxygen a blue whale needs to take in. Oh, yeah.

Per breath. What does it take in? It takes in like 300,000 krill every time it does like a swallow or something. Something like that. It's mental. It's discussed that. And the weight of the amount of krill that a blue whale eats in a year. Yeah.

We looked that up. Yeah, we already talked about it. We did a Pat's math. We did a Pat's math on it. That's exactly right. And he doesn't even remember the krill weight. So anyway, look. I love that that's the thing

that jumped out to you the most. Dude, I thought, so you just posted something on Instagram. You were the, I saw that other people posted it after you were the first one to post the thing of what's going on in the Gulf of Mexico. I don't know about the first ever, but yeah.

No, no, you were the first, I hadn't seen it. Yeah. It is fucking crazy, dude. Yeah, it's. Yeah, we got it here. There it is. People are nuts. So what happened was Pemex, right?

I think Pemex is the second. or third, the guy who runs Pemex's second or third largest, or sorry, wealthiest person in Mexico, one of the wealthiest people in the world. Okay. It's a huge oil corporation. It's like way bigger than, you know, ExxonMobil and the ones that we have are familiar with here in the States. Huge, huge, huge corporation. Okay.

One of their pipes burst. Yeah. Pipe was, it was a high pressure line, I believe, moving gasoline, not oil, if I'm not mistaken, from that platform that you can see to insure. Anyway, burst, caught on fire. you can see. I made a joke. I mean, you know,

Trist's still trying to be serious. And by caption, I'm like, oh, this is how, you know, Pacific Rim starts, a human fuck up and, you know, and the sea burning in biblical proportions.

Why can't we learn from our mistakes as humans? The amount of people fighting back on that is bananas. Yeah. Really? Oh, yeah. What do you mean?

What are they saying? In the comments. Yeah, in the comments. There's what? 300 comments on it? I don't know. I haven't read them all, but I read maybe 20 or 30 of them. And there's people like, oh, you know, they're like a very, very neutral post where I made

a joke about Pacific Rim and said, like, we as humans need to learn from our mistakes. Not political. Right. Not pointing left or right. Right. Very neutral. You hate oil. No, I don't hate oil.

Right. I mean, I think we need to find renewable energy sources, but I'm not anti-oil. Regardless, very neutral post. people go in bananas like there's Trump talk on there there is you know some guy

about 40 people wrote this is fake which I thought is really funny because it's it's everywhere right and then there was like a couple dozen comments that were like

oh and you sit there writing this from your petroleum based phone like you hypocrite and I'm like where was I supposed to write it from a piece of wood what other option was there it's just it's

crazy what people glob onto to get offended by. But also, what the fuck is going on? Like, right, how does water set on fire? Oil. Oil. Oil just lays on top of it. It's the oil that's on fire. It's floating to the top. And it's pluming up from the pipe? Correct. Yeah. So, oil floats on the surface of water, right? Like you pour oil into a pot of water, it sits on top. So the oil's shooting up to the surface. How it caught on fire, I don't know. As it breaks the surface, it's catching onto fire, or catching into flame. the heat is creating that bubbling effect that you're seeing. It's like a boiling point wood.

And what you're seeing there, I believe, is they are using spray to try and control it so that it doesn't spread. If that gets to that, Derek, that platform, it's bad. And they might be using a flame retardant, I'm not really sure. But regardless, that's what you see going on there. It is a pretty crazy situation. Apparently they had it under control in five hours. The thing that I was most surprised about, when the Exxon Valdez

had its leak, the whole world was like up in arms. Yeah. Yeah. This didn't even make like headlines. Yeah, really? Have you seen it anywhere? I mean, I saw you and Joe Rogan post it.

You know what I mean? Right, that's it's it. Yeah, it's not on CNN. It's not on the front of CNN. It's not on time. It's not on Forbes. Like, what's going on? Is it, like, a catastrophic spill?

Not really. No. Okay. But it's still, the visuals are insane. The visuals is insane on this. And regardless. Regardless, it's an oil spill that's on fire. You know, like, it's certainly not good.

Yeah. And yet, for some reason, it seems to have just kind of like, you know, okay, moving on. Dude, the fish that are seeing that must just be, like, so mind-blown. Is it weird that I saw this and I was like, hmm, I wonder if there's cooked lobster under there. Yeah. Maybe. Like, just pre-oil oil in the water down there. That could be kind of good.

Well, remember, so the BP oil spill happened more recently. And that was the biggest one ever, I think. Yeah. Yeah. the one in the Gulf of Mexico. The Exxon Valdez, part of why that, I mean, definitely, like, made news because it was a massive oil tanker that fucking fully leaked out. Right. But part of it was also that the captain was drunk.

Oh, I didn't remember that. And it was human error that fucked that up and caused the catastrophic spill. But, dude, I remember when the BP oil spill happened, I was like, fucking fuck BP, man. And then I found out that ARCO gas stations were BP. So I was like, I'm like, starts with one person, man. I'm boycotting ARCO. when I need gas, if ARCO is the closest, I'm going. Yeah, of course.

Which makes me an asshole. Debit only, though. I know, debit only 35 cents. 35 cents, yeah. It speaks to what you just said, man. I mean, like, we live in a world where, unfortunately, we're all addicted to convenience. So, I mean... Well, sorry, go ahead.

For sure. No, I mean, all I was going to say is, like, you know, you're getting these hate comments on just posting something simple, you know... It's not hate, it's ignorance, and that's what annoys me. Right. I mean, it's like, I don't, there really isn't any hate. There's not one person on there being like, you're an idiot, how dare you? It's just sort of like ignorance. It's like the people going, this is fake and, you know, oh, you're judging oil, which I never was.

Right. That stuff, you know, it's just like sort of ignorance. And it's like, I pose this question to people a lot. It's like, if your job was to save the world, but you had to get in a car that burn fuel every day to get there, wouldn't you still get in the car to go there? Yeah. You know what I mean? Like, it's like, you can judge. the oil industry or the gas industry and still use a car because you still have to do go about

your life you know what i mean yeah patrick's right you can boycott bp you can make small choices right that might help but at the end of the day like we still have to live a normal life and continue to make the decision to progress as a society over like sit there and be like ah fuck it it's all too late oil products are great let's not let's not progress let's not move forward like that's just crazy thinking well totally i mean like even even just like recycling. When it comes to recycling, I'm like a nut about it. I'm like, why wouldn't I recycle? Like, it's simple. It's easy. It's like a habit. And then I see people not recycling and not to like talk shit or anything, but I'm just like, well, why? Like if you have it right there, it's the bin next to the fucking dumpster. Like, who cares? It takes no more effort whatsoever. It takes no more effort. I've had one and a half white claws. I'm done. He turned into Elmer Fudd. Forest. Where did you shoot your, um,

That crocodile short film that you made? In Mexico. On the border between Mexico and Belief. Was that anywhere near Escondido? Puerto Escondido, Mexico? Yeah, Puerto Escondido, Mexico? Yeah. No.

Why is that, Pat? Well, because I saw something on the news, might. And this is fucked up, man. So a woman was swimming. They were on vacation in Puerto Escondido, Mexico, right? So when you're on vacation, you had a couple mitis. It's the first night, man. You're like, oh, my God, we got six more days of this.

Fucking vibes are. through the roof so it's on the Pacific side. Yeah. So they're swimming in a bay after dark. Yep. Okay? Not something I would do soberly. No, never. Although we did

do that one time. I know you did that in Santa Barbara one time. You and I. He also said soberly, though. Yeah, that's true. You're hammered. Yeah. So anyway, they're swimming and this woman's with her twin sister vacation. Suddenly the twin sister screams and gets dragged under the water.

What are you thinking? Well, you kind of gave it away with the setup. Yeah. Fuck. Crocodile! Yeah. All right. The other twin swims over.

Okay. Her sister's being attacked by a fucking crocodile. That's wild. It's not good. Awful. Yep. She started punching it in the face instinctively. It kept going and going.

Grab the other twin three separate times, kept fighting it off, fighting it off. Got the sister's lifeless body back to the boat. brought to a hospital and they think she's going to make a full recovery, been treated for the wounds. I don't know what full recovery means. Yeah, right. If a crock gets you.

But, fucking, I didn't... Were they in the ocean? Yeah, must have been. Saltwater crocodile, right? No. So, okay, where I made the film, in Mexico, all of the Central Americas, all the way up to Florida,

we have American crocodile. Okay. American crocodile, you can pull up a pick if you want, Retep. They are a crocodile species. that live in an esterine environment, meaning... Brackish water. Like the Florida Keys, right?

Or like the Everglades, where the Everglades dump into the ocean. In order to get into those esterine environments, they move through the ocean. They're not like other species of crocodile that'll like to crawl up on the land and sit in the sun and bake and cover big distances. They move from basically bay to bay by going out along the coast and back in.

So they are a salt water crocodile in the sense of they hang out in the ocean. ocean, but they are an American crocodile. Now, here's the thing. Fucking dinosaurs what they are. Oh, absolutely. They are, they're still a crocodile. They're scary. They're aggressive. They're not like an alligator. Alligators are pretty much puppies. Right. But this wouldn't have happened if they weren't swimming at night, period. Okay, why is that? The crocodiles are nocturnal hunters. They have excellent eyesight. We've been over this. They are very opportunistic, so they will feed when the opportunity presents itself. I'm guessing, and I don't know this, that that bay that they were swimming in

Puerto Escondido has hundreds of swimmers in it all the time. But because they were two girls by themselves swimming out at night, you know, full moon, crocodiles, they are nocturnal hunters. You know, this was a prey splashing around in the water. A couple drunk girls on vacay in Mexico, forget about it. Like that's bait. Dude, that sucks. So this crocodile was basically just moving. He was probably just like, I got to get back to this other. area. Exactly. You just think you're going

for a swim in the ocean. Yeah. And a fucking crocodile hits you. In Mexico. It's hunting because it's fucking hungry, right? It doesn't give a shit. It's just like, yeah, it doesn't just attack to attack because you're territory.

No, it was because they were under 21. Yeah, okay. It was fucking pissed up. It makes sense. That's what I was thinking, yeah. But dude, that's way worse than getting bitten by a shark, in my opinion. Not because of like chance of survival,

but just like, why did that have to happen to me? Yeah. Like, that's like you're walking. Like, that's like dying because a gargoyle fell off a building. Totally. Totally. Yeah. Strike a lightning when nobody else.

Right. Even, I feel like even more rare would be to get fucking attacked by crocodile than getting struck by lightning. Oh, absolutely. The odds of it being there and you being in the fucking bay with it, just at night, just no way. Did you know that once you've been, I just found this out recently, once you've been struck by lightning, you're infinitely more likely to be struck by lightning.

Really? Yeah. I forget what the increased rate is. And not only that, but there's a guy. Did we talk about this on the pod before? Who's been struck by lightning like 17 times or something like that? I think you might have mentioned it, but... Yeah, some guy got the world's worst luck.

He's like a game warden in the Midwest. He's been struck by lightning. It's like 12 times. And it's a crazy amount, yeah. That's fucking wild. Like, do you think that's because they're like now, they're charged electrically and the lightning is attracted to them? I don't know.

But all I'm saying is you live in the Midwest, right? Big Thunder and Lightning storms. You get struck by lightning once. Bummer. You get struck by lightning twice. Okay, that's really unlucky. Struck by lightning three times. Get the fuck out of the Midwest.

Go to Arizona. Come to Southern California where we haven't seen a cloud in four years. Like, just get out of the Midwest. By the way, you're just living your life in absolute fucking terror at all times. You hear, you see a raindrop.

You hear a thunderstorm. I am burying myself underground. Oh, my God. Anytime you hear a loud noise. There's just no way. It's coming again. It's coming. Here it comes.

They're going to get me. But honestly, yeah, like move. Move to fucking California. It's one of only the only two good things we have going for us out here in L.A. No lightning. Good weather. Well, I'll tell you, the third good thing we had in Southern California for I moved here in 2003. No mosquitoes.

Yeah, not anymore. I grew up, man. Fucking Northeast. They ruin every summer night. I've talked about it. Yep. There are, there's fucking more mosquitoes here than there are in fucking Greenland. What happened?

Where are you seeing mosquitoes? Everywhere. Bro, it's like a known thing. It's bonkers. Fucking bugs are out of control. No way. I don't have them at my house. Bro.

My doors are open all night. My girlfriend gets these fucking welts. Like, I'm talking, she got one on her knee. I think yours too, but like fucking just huge, fucking giant swollen welt. I'm like, I. They're generally in the like genital region? Yeah. No.

She also will never hang out here or with you. Thanks for that. No. Yeah, man. It's crazy. I got a mosquito situation. One of the Brosner sent this in. Ooh, love this shit.

Teratup Trent. Territ up Trent. Sent his in. Tear it up, Trent. Yeah. So, I think this is an interesting story. So there's a place called Maria Island. Okay.

It is off the coast of Tasmania. Okay. Little Island, not a big one. They have penguins there. Okay. I think I know about Maria Island. Okay. So, yeah, they got a bunch of penguins.

They have 3,000 mating pairs. of penguins, they wanted to reintroduce Tasmanian devils, which had gone extinct there. Yep. You know, they were all dead. They did that on a bunch of islands because they're like safe colonies. Oh, okay. For the devils. So they reintroduced an initial population of 28 Tasmanian devils, which within three years had grown to 100, which is great.

That's good. Good numbers. Yeah. They ate all 6,000 penguins. No way. What? Yeah. Wait, 108, 6, 6,000 penguins?

Yeah. They are voracious, man. They are crazy little animals. Yeah. We're such assholes for laughing, but it's just ridiculous. It's not good. It's not good. A hundred.

Dude, that means each fucking devil ate six hundred, no, 60 penguins. Yeah, if they were evenly distributed you. But you know, you had like the alpha out there. It was like just steel. Like the seagull. I've eaten 4,000. I saw a seagull the other day in a bag of Doritos. Like, there's a one massive seagull.

There's 20 around. Yeah. And he's literally just like, fuck off. Zero fucksgiving. Well, so let me ask you this for us. Let's say that was a project you were working on, right? Let's reintroduced Tasmanian Devils. They've got all these problems.

They've gone extinct on this little island. We're going to put 28 out there. And then someone calls you and goes, hey, just so you know, they ate 6,000 penguins and they're now no more penguins. Like, what's your sort of general take on, like, did they fuck up? Is this a mistake? Like, how the fuck does something like this? happen? How bad would you feel?

So first of all, I would definitely feel bad. So let me explain the situation for those that don't fully understand it. So Tasmanian Devils, their populations, they have been edging very, very close to extinction because they get a disease, much like Retef's girlfriend.

Bro, I'm kidding. I'm kidding. I'm kidding. I love you, baby. These guys are fucking dicks. They get a disease, which is a type of herpes called facial tumor disease. I'm sorry. It's okay.

I mean, you're an asshole. I am. You should actually pull this up because we don't have Will, a picture of Tasmanian devil with facial tumor disease. And they get this version of herpes that they mate, so they are fight and they go in with each other and it's just like herpes, contact spreads it, right? So their population just plummeted down to, I don't know the numbers. It's apparently down to under 20,000.

At one time or now? They're saying now it's down to under 20,000. I think it was worse like six years ago, but I could be wrong. Anyway, their population just went way down. And when I was in Tasmania, you see it. Yeah, it's brutal. You see it because there's roadkill everywhere. Because there's no predators left.

The thylacine's gone. Tasmanian devils are dwindling. Anyway, with all this going on, what the Tasmanian government did, and very cleverly and rightfully so, is they rounded up a bunch of devils, tested them. They're like, nobody has herps. Let's put them in a safe place, right? a place where they could get no contact with other devils, other mammals, etc.

So they cannot pass on this facial disease. So they put them on little islands. And they're like, we'll put 10 here, we'll put 20 here, we'll put 30 here, and they'll be totally cut off from the others. So no matter what happens, if all facial tumor disease runs through all the Tasmanian devils in mainland Tasmania, we'll still have these little colonies that we can repopulate from that are totally clear of the disease. Right.

And it's a brilliant idea, right? Because you're not destroying the habitat. you're not fencing them off, you're not doing, you're putting them in places that they theoretically should be. And sure enough, this happened. The little penguin, as it's called, her Tasmanian penguin, which I just looked up their species, their population numbers, because I was like, I wonder how devastating that is. It says their estimates are between 110,000, 190,000 breeding pairs. So there's quite a lot of them. So don't get me wrong, that's not a billion of them, but, you know, if, what did you say, 6,000 got eaten? Yeah. Don't get me wrong, I wouldn't

be stoked if I'd worked on that project. I probably wouldn't be advertising that I was a part of that project. But it's also not the end of the world for that species of penguin. I think, and I don't, I haven't read about any of this yet, but I'm guessing they're going to have to come up with a middle ground where they put up a fence so that the devil's kind, because the penguins just go on the rocks, right? They don't go far inland. Yeah. So they're going to have to do something where those penguins can recolonize that island because it's probably very important nesting ground for them. Sure. Sure. So the moral of the story here, as soon as as we start fucking with things, we always fuck it up worse.

Yeah. We're like, okay, we're going to move these devils to this island. Oh, devil's wiped out the penguins. Now we have to figure out how to fix the penguins. In doing that, it's going to fuck something else up. Yeah. Chain reaction, it never ends. It doesn't matter.

We all think we're smart, biologists. We're all idiots. We fuck everything up. They've been talking about introducing sterile mosquitoes into the population to control the mosquito population. Do you think, like, I mean, you think of something similar? Like, something catastrophic could happen from that, or do you think, like... Something catastrophic can always.

happen. I mean, we're always, we're constantly learning from our mistakes and progressing. They have done that, I think with the fruit flies, the sterile fruit flies, they've done it with mosquitoes in certain parts of the world. The thing is, we don't know what the ramifications are yet. Right. So it's like, oh, this sounds good on theory. It checks all the boxes. You know, I'm sure there are species of bat that their entire diet depends on those mosquitoes. And if all the mosquitoes go away, all humans are happy, maybe the bat dies out. Maybe that's where it ends. And we're like, who cares? You know, there's now only 10 of those bats that there used to be a million of, right? Right, right. But what eats those bats? What relies on those bats guano? What relies on

those bats to pollinate or fertilize things? So it's like those little things. And people do attempt to think of that, but there's always ramifications that you don't consider. Because it's all connected. Every single thing. Like this animal here in Africa is completely connected to this animal here in North America. We just don't see it or we don't know how they're connected. So when something happens here, trickle down effect, cascade effect, whatever it is, everything shifts. Yeah. So, immortality. Immortality?

Would you take it? No. I would not. I would take it. You'd take it? Yeah. What if it was in the form of a clone army? So they're going to clone an army of me? Basically. So if you... Yeah, go ahead.

I don't care so much about my DNA. I care about my consciousness. So if my consciousness isn't part of that army, then I'll pass. Well, it wouldn't be, but the perfect clone of you would have the same consciousness, but it wouldn't be yours. Don't care. Don't care. Yeah, I want my brain to continue. Do you really think you would take immortality, though? If someone said you just stop aging right now and you could live until the sun implodes, yeah.

But what about after the sun implodes, mate? Yes, absolutely. Just an eternity of fucking nothingness? I'm going to face an eternity one way or the other. It's true. One is I'm conscious, one is I'm gone. I'll pick that I'm going. That I'm still around.

Either way. This is baffling to me. Eternity scares you. That's what scares both of you. Yes. Correct. You can't get rid of that. That's happening.

But do you need to be there for it? Yes, please. Interesting. Forrest? Would I take it? Yeah. I don't think so. I don't even think I'd extend my life.

You know, if I was like I could live to 150, I'd be like, for sure. Immortality, no way. You got to watch all your loved ones come and go every single time. Oh, that too. Can you imagine? You're just like, you're happy, you're married. You outlive your kids, your grandkids, like, you don't age. They're all getting old and crusty.

You're watching fucking grandkid number four die of heart disease at age 90. Over and over for three billion years. You would get used to it. Well, Pat's like, I love you, but you don't really have a heart. I would just choose to continue on. That's fair. It is fair. It's a fair.

It's a fair. It's a fair. Well, the reason I ask this question, and I do think this is very interesting, is scientists have actually found that in Africa, the African bee can create immortal clone armies, okay, to take over their rivals nests and kill their queen from the inside. Okay. This is fascinating. It is. So the South African Cape Honeybee can create a perfect copy of themselves with one individual bee found to have done so millions of times in the past three decades. How? Well, I'm not a bee scientist, but basically it's perpetual cloning. Okay. So it's not reproduction.

It's cloning. Correct, because there's no queen required. So they are doing actual, is it parthenogenesis? I think that's the term. Yeah, parthenogenesis, where they can divide cells and continue to reproduce without intercourse. So, yeah, they're literally churning out copy after copy, no need for a queen between, you know, working bees. And, yeah, no need for a queen at all. And they're making millions of copies of the same.

individual be in order to go in and take over a rival nest. Interesting. That's pretty amazing. It's brilliant. Nature, man. Nature is definitely metal. I mean, that's insane. Well, I was just looking at the write-up, and then there's this detail.

They go in, they create thousands of themselves inside this other colony, and then the clones don't do any work. So the cloned offspring do no work for the colony. They just free load. They just roll in their takeover and then kick back. Yeah. There's like a few other examples of this in nature, right? Forests, like there's ants that do this too, don't that?

I watch like a video, I feel like where they... In the takeover space or the cloning space? Yeah, you're right. It's different. I think what they do is they like, they get them to take their eggs or something and, like, take care of the young and they take them back and then the eggs. Yeah, so there's that that is parasitic reproduction where, like, there's even birds that'll come in and drop their eggs and another bird's neck. and have to take over. There's all kinds of stuff.

Dick move. Teads, which is a group of lizards, I believe it's teeds. I'd have to double check that. Have this process called parthenogenesis, where every single lizard born is born hermaphroditic. So both male and sexual, male and female sexual organs. Right.

And then they just clone themselves. They don't reproduce. They don't have sex. They just pop out another one after a certain amount of time and so on and so forth. So there is, yeah. So there has to be some limiting factor that prevents those particular hermaphroditic animals from taking over the world, right?

Because how would they ever, they would just keep reproducing? Well, yeah, but it's not like a science fiction movie where they're just like, bloop, bloop, bloop. They're still limited by predation and by environmental factors. Right, right. It takes a certain amount of time.

Yeah, energy, energy as well. They need food and they need everything. You know, the conditions have to be right. And I believe with, I think it's Tiaz, I believe with Tiaz, you know, they can, choose to actually mate if they want to, and then they use parthenogenesis when they cannot find a mate, and it's because it's basically like an environmental defense. They're like,

find a mate, need to pass on my genetics. Bloop. Right. So yeah, anyway, I don't know. Animals are crazy, man. Like, the fact that you can just be like, yeah, kind of fuck today, baby. Right. Oh, fuck myself today, is what I'm really doing. Do you think that like, so, you know, pretty much every, the entire cycle of life is this idea of passing on DNA, right? There's all sorts of examples of animals.

That is the meaning of life. We always ask what it is, that's it's to reproduce. Right. We talked about, uh, what was the animal we talked about that has the huge that basically has sex nonstop and then it just drops dead. That just like when they go into mating. Was it naked mallrats? Was it naked mallrats?

No, it was like that. It was like a weird little mouse with huge nuts. Oh yeah. I kind of remember that. But it's like, I mean, dude, we're gonna, I bet a thousand years. years from now, our understanding of, it almost seems like the DNA is in complete control of us. Oh, yeah.

Like, it's its own thing almost. We're hardwired. Like, it's a little weird little virus in us that controls us. Well, fucking, I mean, dude, we were just talking about that whole would you be immortal thing. And it's, I mean, it's, it's kind of ethereal like that. This whole DNA and consciousness stuff is all related. Ethereal or ethereal? Yeah, which word were you thinking?

Listen, I have millions of things going on in this brain right here. In this. Head and brain. You haven't switched it on one. Dude, so one of, you know, with all the alien shit that's been coming out, right? Yeah, baby. Have you seen the meme real quick? Have you seen the meme floating around that's like shot on an iPhone, shot on a $63 million

camera? Oh, it's like this hilarious meme. I almost re-shared it, but I didn't want the crazies to come at me. And it, uh, it's like this meme and it says shot on an iPhone. It's like this fantastic, beautiful image, like landscape, colors are immaculate. And it says shot on $63.8 million. military camera and it's just that like smudge in the sky. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah, that adds up. Yeah. But so, you know, obviously all the, the big report I thought was a bit of a dud, the Congress disclosure. Oh, it was terrible. It was a total dought. Did you actually read it?

Did you look at it closely? I have the PDF. I read like the first 10 pages. Okay. And it was just basically like, we don't know what these are. Nothing. To consider that they're an enemy or extraterrestrial need to look into further. Like, it wasn't anything better.

Legitimately, it was exactly what they hyped in the news, but that wasn't what it was supposed to be. I thought it was going to be way more, man. Like more. Like inside Area 51, we've got aircraft. None of that shit. So anyway, but one of the theories is pretty interesting. That is like, okay, if this is extraterrestrial, what could they be doing here?

And one of the theories is mining or they want elements. element, which is phosphorus. Why phosphorus? To the DNA point, phosphorus, not every planet even in our solar system has phosphorus. I think we know that somehow. I think that's accurate. I think it has

something to do with having oxygen in the atmosphere. Maybe, okay. But so phosphorus is a required element for DNA. Sure. So DNA is largely made of phosphate, which is one phosphorus and four oxygen. And without phosphorus,

you can't have DNA. Right. So that was like one of the theories that I found kind of appealing is like this idea that they're here for phosphorus. Yeah, yeah. So that they can like

create more DNA to colonize other planets or whatever they want. We don't know what they want to do with it. Well, dude, I mean a lot of the theories out there about aliens from when I first started getting into the alien stuff was, you know, they back in the day,

they had humans basically mining gold for them and whatnot. So, you know, another theory of that nature. But then also, you know, I was just reading one on Reddit the other day, man. It was so, so great, man. Some crazy guy was claiming that he's been being abducted for like 20 years every certain time frame. It could be a year, it could be two, but that they take him up and like he's spoken with them and he's asked him what they wanted, blah, blah, blah, all this stuff. Super fascinating. Bullshit, obviously. But he's chosen. He was definitely like, you know, he's like, wonderful. of the things that they told me, you know, they do experiments with our DNA. They, they interbreed with us, you know, like, with humans. They like to, like, mix our DNA together and shit and do these, and create, like, basically their offspring for them, too, because there's something about humans that is, like, fascinating to the aliens, like, that that's different than all the other ones.

This is just a psychopath. Here's the thing. Anyone who says that they communicate, like, it's just, Yeah, we all want to be special. Of course. What's a good way to be special? I'll tell people that you have talked to the alien. It's a good attention grabber. The fact of the matter is, is that even the phosphorus, though it's like more scientific and smarter and logical,

it's all just fucking speculation. Nobody's ever encountered these aliens if they have, they're either dead or like highly classified in the military. And so these stories, I mean, it's all, that's what I love about it. Like any of these stories can be fucking true from that one to that one. I mean, think about it this way, too, though. If you, if you're, stay.

If you're, if you're, if you're, if you're, look, we have, we have four billionaires on Earth right now racing to Mars. Yep. We got four of them. Branson's going to be the first. Wait, no, they're trying to get into space. Are they trying to go to Mars? Well, yeah, well, I think they just want to take a joy run. I don't know.

Okay. They're trying to get to space. The point is we have four billionaires racing to space. Yeah. Okay. What's to say that on another planet in an alternate world, there isn't eight billionaires trying to race into space and get to Earth. Sure.

I mean, they keep crashing and burning or missing or whatever. You know, you don't think one of our... Or they just get here and they're like, ah, it sucks. This place sucks. It's terribly. You guys are blowing each other up. I also don't think that, you know, I don't think it's little green men in flying spaceships.

I think it's life like we have on Earth so far away that we couldn't possibly contact it at this point in time. Now, all that being said, I was just thinking what you were saying, Patrick, it's like this guy, right? Or sorry, Rete. This guy who says he's the... chosen one or whatever and he's chatting with him. If you're an alien...

If you're a space traveler, and you land on a planet, say you're an alien and you land on our planet, you land and there's a foreman at Sam's Club. And he's standing up on the box and he's talking to 40 employees at Sam's Club. That's the chosen one. Like here he is talking to all of these people. That is the leader of this area. Oh, yeah. Yeah.

He's the chosen one. Dude, that's like Seinfeld's joke where he's like, if he's a... The aliens are looking at us. He's like, they undeniably think the dogs are the leaders. He's like, yeah, the dogs, and then they have these slaves that follow them around and pick up their shit. Totally, totally. Rub their belly. Yeah, totally.

Yeah, man. I mean, all the fucking alien shit, though, is wild. And that report was a big letdown. There was some banter in the discord. Dude, can you pull up a picture of Skylink? Have you guys seen Skylink? I don't know what Skylink is. Bro, I didn't even know this was Starlink?

Starlink, sorry. Sky. I think I think it's from Terminator, too, or something. I don't know what this is. Dude, so the other night, a couple weekends ago, I went to see some friends, and my buddy was like, dude, Starlink's gonna, like, be really visible tonight.

Okay. I'm like, what are you talking about? I didn't even know what this was. That's what it, it was wicked clear that night. Is it satellite? It's 64, I believe. 64, I'm making that number of. It's a lot.

It's like over 40 and under 70. Okay. Satellites that Elon Musk, SpaceX launched, right? And they travel in a line like that. And you can see when it's coming over you. Yeah. So on really, really clear nights, there's an app that'll, like, tell you when you can see Starlink.

It looks surreal, dude. That's crazy. So basically that was a thing. I've never seen it. Did you see it? Yeah, it didn't look that good. But it was, you could still see it. And it was fucking nuts.

Yeah. But the friends that I was visiting, they were, they had seen it, I guess, a couple weeks before. And they were just drinking in their hot tub. Yeah. And they just saw it and they were like, what in the fuck is that? And they literally thought it was like an alien invasion. Why wouldn't you think that? So what it's doing is those satellites, they're testing it with this first group of like 60 some odd satellites are beaming down Wi-Fi.

Yeah. And so the plan is to eventually have over a thousand. Cover the whole globe. So that there's just internet anywhere you go in the world. So friend of the pod, Ricardo, Dina, my buddy, we remember we sat together and got really wasted on our mom. mushroom trip doing the podcast. That's what he does. So he is a very smart guy

and he does logistics coordination for planes of satellites in space because there are tens of thousands of satellites up there and if two of them are on the same plane they just smash into each other. Of course. And so you have to buy and I couldn't explain it like Ricardo could of course, but you have

to buy basically your trajectory in space. So you rent or buy space in space that your satellite can go. Yeah, so that doesn't just ram into others. You just throw a satellite in the air. There are so many now, and there's so much space junk that it's likely that you're just going to smash into one,

and, you know, there are hundreds of millions of dollars, all of them. Yeah. So it's like what Ricardo does is... They're all going to start crashing, man. Sorry. They're all going to start crashing. They have to. And how are they coordinating this internationally?

Like, I'm sure China doesn't give a fuck about the U.S.'s satellite. No, but they do. Well, right, because they don't want theirs to crash. Well, yeah, nobody does because they put so much money. Ricardo could explain it much better, and I could. Sure. But what he does is he facilitates with this company based in San Francisco that space, that airspace. Like, oh, it's not airspace.

It's space space, I guess. But anyway, and they put together like, all right, you can put up this many satellites here over this much space at this exact distance from Earth, moving at this trajectory, this miles per hour, blah, blah, blah. And it's like crazy. It's air traffic control for satellites. Correct. Yeah. It would have been a great job for you because you. because you love math so much.

Well, you know, it's funny is I asked my fucking junior year in high school trigonometry teacher because you have to take a full fucking year of trigonometry. I remember trigonometry. It sucks. Full year of triangle math. And I literally said, I was like, I'm not shitting on it is my best subject. What might I use this for? And she said air traffic control.

Right. And I was like, anything else? No. And you're like, well, I don't want to work in that field. Yeah, way too stressful. A lot of that bullshit, though, I mean, you know, you know, you know, You're not going to fucking use it, but it grows your brain. Like, you know.

Sure, but that in particular, I, like, calculus, whatever. I was like, I don't need to know about parabolas. But it didn't feel as wasteful as figuring out the hypotenuse. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Just for air traffic control. But, dude, imagine just doing fast trigonometry for eight-hour shifts, where if you mess up,

hundreds of people die the worst death possible. Bro, it's got to be one of the most. fucking stressful jobs. I was talking about this the other day with somebody. Like, you have that job. I mean, aren't you highly prone to, like, do meth or something? Like, what, like, what, you want, you got to be up, just alert for fucking 10 hours or whatever.

I know they have, like, requirements now where you can only work, like, two hours or whatever, man, but I also feel like they probably drug test the fuck out of those guys. That job has got to be just killer on your fucking stress levels, man. Yeah. a mess. So speaking of space, there was something in the news. This was actually a couple weeks ago, but I found it pretty interesting. This is the only show I know in

the world that you can speak openly about these kind of things. This show, right here? The wild times. Okay. Can I just say one quick thing? Air traffic controller is supposedly ranked the most stressful job according to like big survey that was done by production. Oh, interesting. More so than

line producing. Yeah, go Sorry. The first successful test of animals being born in space has taken place. Wow. Yeah. What animal? Does that seem controversial? Maybe not.

Not yet. No. Wait. What? We literally slaughter and eat animals. No, no, no. I know. But I said that you can't just talk about these things openly because there's more.

Okay. Okay. Where are we going with this? Okay. I like it. All right. So we had the first successful test of animals being born in space. Yeah.

That's huge. It's rats. All right. This is the future of life on Mars. This is the future of life on the moon. moon, we can do it. Mm-hmm. And here's how.

Yeah. We shipped rat jizzed rat jizzed into space. Okay. For six months. And then turned them into a healthy litter of space rats. Okay. That's how we did it. Freezed dry.

Controversial, I kind of like this. You know the old little little rat jizz jar. Are they jerking off rats? Is that what you're insinuated? That's how you're getting it. That's how you're getting it. Let me ask you this. So, do you know why the fuck they did?

Like, so did they think that maybe if they inseminated the rat in space that it wouldn't go through pregnancy? You're saying why not just send a very healthy male and female rat into space? No, just why it matters at all. I couldn't tell you. Oh, I know why. Why? They're figuring out what's going to happen when we need.

You know what this means? Yeah. This means there's an asteroid imminently coming. The Earth's coming to an end. Yeah, because they're trying to make sure that you can reproduce. There's four different billionaires racing to space. Yeah. They're sending freeze-dried jizz into space to see if we can recolonize.

Starlink, obviously. Starlinked for some moon base there's space. You don't think Bezos Musk fucking, what's his name? No, they're a third guy. Branson. Branson and whoever else are getting in a circle on an island and just kind of jail into a petri dish. Oh, yeah. Yeah, definitely

are, man. I mean, I'd be in on that too if I was a billionaire. It don't get me wrong. Was this a NASA study? I just says scientists here. I can answer you that. By the way, the tone of this article it starts, it's like billionaires are racing to space. Right. Yeah, it's a

big thing now. Branson's going on July 11th, which is very soon. This looks like it was a Japanese university. Yeah, yeah. Okay. So an asteroid's coming in the next 30 years. Fine. Yep. Like, why else are we doing this?

Dude. Literally no other reason. There's no other reason. No. Yeah. Why wouldn't we just take a couple rats up there and be like, breed? Right. What they want to do is colonize it and then send a bunch of sperm.

Yep. From us lowlies who don't get invited. Yep. Yeah. Yeah. Well, by the way, I mean, we're fine. This podcast is. Spend your money.

Take your all your saving down. Sign up for the Wild Times Patreon. Go on. You can do it. It's low light, dude. The vibe in here is very ethereal. Aetheral. What is it?

Aetheral. But no, like, we can get off the aliens and shit in a minute, but you know I love it. This isn't about aliens. This is about the imminent destruction of Earth. It's right. It's about ratchez. Space, space, just in general. The final frontier.

But they're talking about building a fucking moon base legitimately on the moon. a lot of the speculation about all this slow rolling the disclosure, which we obviously know is bullshit now because that had nothing in it. Yeah, it was trash. But they were saying, you know, because all these guys are racing to space, like these billionaires, private industries are doing this now. Like the theory was that they have to start releasing this information because they're not going to be able to keep a lid on whatever the private corporations

that start going up there see. They've been able to do it because it's always been governments. So, I mean, that's just to add an element, you know, fucking Neil Armstrong or Buzz Aldrin saw a moon base on the moon when he went. He didn't say that, did he? I mean, he alluded. He alludes to it. Okay, question for you. Question for you.

I love it. Probably punch me in the face if he heard me say that about him. Hypothetical, all right? He's known to do that. It's coming up. Six years from now. Yep, it's coming up. Very close.

Jesus Christ. We found Terra 2, right? Okay. Terra 2? As in Earth, it's three years away by space travel. Okay. We've cracked the code. We can do it.

We can get there. Yeah, yeah. You are asked to be one of the first among 10,000 to go there. Colonize it. Set it up. Yeah. Go help. One way ticket.

Yeah. Are you going? I mean, I'm not going. No, they would never select me. I have many weaknesses. You have been requested. You've been randomly selected. You've been randomly selected.

You've been randomly selected. Fuck, no. I'm declining. I can't, there's nothing I can do. Is Earth about to be destroyed? Nope. Earth's destroyed. No, no, yeah.

You're just going to start a civilization? 110%. Well, yeah, he would go. He's nuts, dude. Dude, I would be like Charles Darwin. I'd be going to all of the new creatures, all of the new animals. Everything would be a discovery. He wants to play with moon lizards.

Listen, the second I stepped on the earth, I'd be like new species, new species. The cataloging, the categorizing. You're like a child. God, are you kidding me? Here's what happened. Forrest literally catalogs the entire planet. It takes him three years. He gets back to the base. He's got a whole encyclopedia of new stuff. And then BTG just steps out and just bongs him on the head and takes the book. It goes. Here you go. Let me tell you what happens if I go there.

First of all, after the whole three years getting there, I'm already like, oh, my back is sore. I'm getting off the spaceship. I'm just like. Everybody's all excited to get their... Peter's going on. Is there a ticket back? He's like, get me back. Now. Is there a chiropractor on this planet yet?

They better, God damn, well, have a chiropractor. I'll make your fucking lives miserable unless you send me back. I think the Brosner should weigh in on this question because it's super interesting. Would you go and why? Yeah. In the comments. It's new life. It's new life.

The discoveries, would I give up my whole life and live in a tent on a new planet while we build civilization 100%. Yeah. Would I contribute? not even a little bit. I would just go... Solo? I would just... No, no, no.

I would contribute to the knowledge of the wild animals there. But I, like, if you're asking me to go build a, build a tree stand or something, forget about it. Go to cooperate with people?

No, I'll be cooperative. I'm just not the guy to build the infrastructure. You're gonna be a fucking warlord, dude. I would be. I think I would be. Did you know how there's blue tongue skinks? Yeah.

There's a skink. There's a skink here with a green tongue. Oh, could you imagine? A green tongue skink? Yeah. Mind blown. Dude, I'd be interested to see what you think of this for us, because I'm torn on how interesting this is.

Okay. So this is about animals. But so one of the things when people talk about how advanced the Maya were, right? The society that lived in Central American, Mexico, very advanced. We think of them as these badass warriors. They eventually died out. Build Tikal and Toul and Tulum. and all those great ruins.

Totally. Yep. So the Maya were, apparently the first recorded human civilization that had a concept of zero. Okay. Right. And as part of their math. Even before, like, the ancient Greeks or anything like that, they were very advanced with their math. Okay.

They understand zero, and that's this heady concept. Sure. Intigers of, you know, one, there's something. Correct. You know, it's a little hard to get as an adult human because we just understand it so clearly. Right. Yeah. Yeah, but so...

But to explain it, if I'm understanding where you're going with this, the concept of zero, it's like the concept of nothingness. It doesn't make sense. It's okay to have less of something. It's okay to have more of something. It's comprehensible. But the nothingness doesn't... It means nothing.

It's like what is in this space. Right. There's nothing there. Right. Yeah. So this is a big deal, I guess, for these scientists that published a study. So they found that they did a... Very elaborate study, which I can explain a little bit of.

Okay. Crows were found to understand the concept of zero, right? And so basically what they did was the scientists at the University of Tübingen in Germany basically did this thing where they would put these dots. Basically, it looks like an egg with a number of dots on it on a screen. Okay. And then they basically rewarded the crows. They would do two successive images.

and if they matched and the crow pecked the screen, they would reward them. Okay. If they matched only. Got it. I don't know if they punished them if they didn't match. But basically they would do like four dots. You want a bad call.

Right. Four dots, four dots. If they pecked it, they get a reward. Sure. And then there would be like a blank screen followed by another blank screen. Yep. And they understood that zero was the same. Yeah.

And so they're like, crows get the concept of zero. This is a huge deal. They must have like much more interesting. complex brains than we thought. Yeah, I mean, I've been preaching. Crows are fucking smart, man. I read a study, yeah.

I mean, I've mentioned it before on the podcast, but where they recognize human faces and communicate that to their offspring and friends and hold grudges. Like, they did a study on it. Right. And pros are smart. They're very smart.

Is that interesting was Patrick's question? No. No. Fuck. Why to talk about our podcast? Very uninteresting. To me, from the methodology that you would explained, what they are doing is conditioning the crows to get a treat based on nothing or based on something.

Zero, mate. So basically, it doesn't necessarily, to me, mean that they understand the concept of zero. Rather, they understand the concept of, if I tap something that isn't zero, I get a treat. Hmm. Okay. Do you know what I mean? Does that add up? No.

Okay. Let's chat through it. Because it had to match. The two screens had to match. So they knew that nothing and nothing. Oh, so they were side-by-side screens? Yeah, they would, like, change it out. One after the next.

Yeah, one after the next. So you're saying that they put four dots, they'd tap and get a treat. Right. And then if they put nothing and they didn't tap, they didn't get a treat. But if they put nothing a second time and didn't tap, then they got a treat? No. No, this is fucked up. Forrest would have failed this test, for sure.

Basically, it would be, like, image with four dots. Yep. Then an image with three dots. Yep. Better not peck. Oh, I see. they pecked, they get a tree. I understand.

And so they understood that nothing and nothing was the same thing. I understand. Okay, yes, I did not fully understand when you were explaining it. Wow, that is, yeah, that is interesting. I just had the... I'm changing. Now that I understand the study was done. Hey, switch to my camera.

I'm going back to interesting. It's interesting. I'm glad I brought it up. Good job, Pat. Dude, I mean, the fucking crows, though, man. Like, wait, is that a real thing? They can understand human faces and then communicate a phone. face?

Yes. What are you? They'd tell another crow like that guy's a fucking piece of shit. Generations.

And they patch it down. Yeah. Dude, so they did a study. How do they do that? This is what happened. They did a study. I only know this because Peter told me

about the aliens are going to be involved here. No, they were catching the crows or whatever and fucking tagging them or what, and just like doing some some random experiment. I forget what it was exactly.

But the crows learned to fucking avoid these researchers and then told all their crow friends. And then all the crows And they would and they like I think a researcher came back like years later or something and was just attacked by a bunch of fucking crows on campus. And then they realized that it wasn't the same crows. It was like different generation of crows and other crows that weren't involved in the experiment. Oh, that's fucking weird.

Yeah. It's cool. So they're able to communicate the face like hey, look at that guy. Remember his face? Yeah. A not pad? Yeah, that guy's bad. So they literally just like they obviously

They have a ton of different sounds Yep So they like just go like Brah! And then they go towards you with the beak And they go brah And then they go I get it I'm gonna go tell everyone

Yeah totally I mean I love crows But I wish they didn't have Such a fucking annoying ass sound man I got so many crows in my neighborhood Oh dude force I gotta ask you about this I have to indulge I think people will be interested

Let's Huge milestone in my house My household Listening A cat named Lemley You're familiar? Yeah. First kill.

Oh, ever? Ever? Wow, a mouse. She's never been an outdoor cat. Right. Yeah. But now we have this fully enclosed jungle-y backyard.

Right, with the bamboo. Yeah. And there's lots of trees and everything. So she's out there and she can't get out. Yeah. So she's even like spent a couple nights out where she just doesn't want to come in. I'm like, all right, you're fine, you know. She likes to be out there.

Brought a mouse, dead mouse, put it on the fucking doorstep. A little gift for you? Yeah. And like, say. Since, I don't think I'm anthropomorphizing here, since the mouse kill, which was last weekend, she's acting more rough around the edges across the board. Oh, she's gone feral. She's out. She's got, like, tufted hair.

She's, like, acting wild tufted hair. And, like, she'll do this thing where she weighs on her belly, and, like, I'll just give her a little scratch with my toes, just real quick. Like, when she's on the floor, because I'm too old and crotchety to bend down. And, uh, 12-year-old cat, bit me on the toe. way first time. Yep. Looks like a little. I've never even felt her teeth before.

She's going wild. She's literally going feral. Is this a thing? Like, do you think she got a kid? And by the way, I did inspect the mouse because I was like, maybe Lemley didn't do it. Maybe an owl dropped it. Literal cat puncture wounds in the throat. Wow.

Is this a thing? Animals obviously do go feral, right? Like if you let a dog out, it will go feral. It will become street dog and go wild and fend for itself. I think, and I don't know that there's any science behind this. be very curious, actually. I think what happens is, cat goes outside, kills a mouse,

it invokes an instinctual behavior that it has never had access to before. So it's always been capable of killing a mouse. Lemley's always had that capability, right? But never had access. Yeah. So all of a sudden, she has the ability to act on this instinctual impulse

that she never could before. It, like, jazzes her up. It's like you getting in a bar fight, you know, you throw that punch, you go, yeah, I'm going to fight everybody. or you break down crying go, why do I do that or whatever? It's like this thing that comes over you

that you can't really control after that intense experience. And I think that's the same thing for a domestic animal. It's like it's going back to its instinctual roots and I think Lemley's totally feeling a little more wild

than she ever has. She's like, you know, cats out of the bag, lions out of the cage, however you want to call it. Yeah. Yeah. When she bit my toe,

I was like, oh yeah, this is real. Your toe's very mousy looking. It's true. Oh, that's funny. There's a great DJ named Dead Mouse. Is it Dead Mouse or is it like Deadmouse? I think it's spelled differently. Yeah.

I think it's like D-E-D-M-A-U-S or something, but you pronounce it. Dead mouse. Dead mouse. Well, speaking of Dead Ma'am, let's just, it's a hybrid of Dead Ma. He's got to let your tongue flobbering. Ethel. This time, can I get a little jingle? Yeah.

Uh, yeah. He's managing lots of things. Reteb's still figuring out how to use the new studio. Yeah, that's great. Top three in DFL. It's time. Okay, I thought we're going into BR. Gotcha.

No, top three in DFL, we're going to get it in. First one on the new studio, we're doing both games. Oh, sweet. Top three. And dead fucking last worst concerts you've ever been to. Concerts. Oh, it rolls right into it from my dead mouse. Nice segue, mate.

Yeah, thank you. Oh, I see what you did there. Yeah, that adds up. Okay. What did he got for us? Why don't you go first? I'll go first. Sorry.

All right. Top three in third place. No, that actually... Yeah. Third place, went to a red-out chili peppers concert. Nice. Super fun. Loved it.

Good. Good. Sounds great. Second and first place, and I'll explain, was I went to at the Santa Barbara Ball, I went to Offspring and Blink 182. Together. That is some real 90s shit.

Together. Yeah, it's nice. I literally offspring came on and I was, sorry, Blinkwini 2 came on and I was like, this is the greatest concert ever. I love Blinquent 82. That was all I listened to in high school and college. Yeah. Basically every drive I've ever been on.

And then offspring came on after that, making it number two and then number one. And the offspring was insane. I mean, it was so cool. People were going nuts. How old were you saying? 20-ish. Okay. 20-21.

It's just real amped up on testosterone. Oh, there was an offspring like 90-style mosh pit where like people just threw. throw each other around. Oh, yeah. But to offspring music, which is not that hard, you know? Okay. So it's like, yeah, you're listening to Americana and, like, jumping around and just having a, just having a good old time. That's definitely number three and two, loved it.

DFL, which it's like a mixed emotion. Oh, boy, this is a funny story. Do I tell this on air? I guess I have to at this point. Seems like you have to at this point, yeah. So I had a very serious. DFL, right? DFL, right?

DFL. Okay. Very serious girlfriend all through college. A girlfriend was out of town. Hadn't done much in a while. Cascade. No, Cascada. Is that how you say it?

I just thought it was Cascade. Whatever. You know what I'm talking about. It's like electronic music. Yeah, but like that female vocalist, electronic-y. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's every time we touch, I get this feeling. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

That means nothing to me, but go ahead. What? You know the song, I guarantee you. Girlfriend goes out of town. It's ASVT, all sorority volleyball tournament weekend. Okay. Okay. I'm, my buddy calls me up, it's Friday night. He's like, hey man, ASVT tomorrow. You want to go out? Yeah, let's go out. Let's be fun. Get absolutely obliterated on Friday night. Go to ASVT Saturday morning, like, barely remember it.

Get back to the house, pass out. It was all kind of a blur. Wake up and I'm in these super short shorts. Of course you are. Super short orange shorts. No shirt, matching neon orange headband. By the way, I don't smoke cigarettes. have cigarette in like four cigarette behind each year and like four cigarettes piled into the headband I'm like all right this is my look for oh and big aviators I'm like this is my look for the night yeah cascade cascada whatever she's coming they're coming to UCSB that night playing at the the bell tower I'm like yeah you know we've been partying all weekend let's go to you're basically dressed like lieutenant dingle from fucking uh reno nine reno nine oh yeah dude it's a mess like there's pictures of it it's a mess there's cigarettes in the head

band. I don't smoke, but they look cool. I've got the aviators on. Cigarettes are all broken, like, you know, there's tobacco in my hair. It's a mess. Anyway, so go to the Cascada concert, and there's this girl there who I shall not name on air, who I had a crush on since like freshman year. I'm like a junior at this point, right?

She's in like all my biology classes. I see her all the time. Big crush on her the whole time. Girlfriend's out of town. Didn't act on it, but she's there. She comes over to me. I'm dressed like a fucking nitwit. I'm with like nine of my buddies. And she comes over to me, she's like, oh my God, forest, I didn't know you're going to be here, blah, blah, blah, blah.

I'm obliterated, like, the most drunk I've ever been. And, like, but still somehow holding it together and remembering it. We start dancing to this concert. Like, it's like, every time, you know, everybody's just jumping and dancing. The picture you are painting is incredible right now. Well, I'll tell you why, because I was having such a good time and went to DFL real quick. So this girl and I are dancing, like, nothing's happening, but it's like, oh, my God, yes, she's actually into me. This is so cool, blah, blah, blah, like dancing with her.

these guys are, everybody's around. They're like, yeah, for us. Everybody knows that I've had a crush on this girl forever, including my girlfriend who was out of town. And anyway, this is just chicks dancing with me. Everybody's getting hyped up. I grabbed this chick. I'll just say her first name.

Her name was Kristen. Not the one that you're thinking of. Yeah. And I grab this chick named Kristen and literally throw her into the air because everybody's just hyped up and dancing and, like, jumping. And apparently I was a lot stronger or a lot more drunk or she was a lot lighter than I anticipated. I threw her like seven feet in the air. She came down, landed on her feet, twisted her ankle to the point of like, we all thought it was broken. She's crying. The sea of

people part. The medic has to come into the concert, lift her out. This is a girl I've had a crush on for three years. I'm like, you almost killed her. I basically almost killed her. I'm like hanging my head in shame. She's like yelling at me. She's like, why did you throw me in the air? Like, I don't know. Roll someone. Yeah. Meanwhile, you have the two cigarettes in, the short shorts. Oh, there's just cigarettes everywhere. The short shorts.

And literally like IVFP, the Isla Vista Foot Patrol, the cops come up. They're like, who did this? And I'm like, I did. It was just like, it just went from being like the coolest most fun night weekend ever to like you hurt this cute girl for no reason. You're a terrible person. Three years of your secret silent crush just down the tubes. Yep, exactly. Yeah, you had a girlfriend anyways.

By the way, as soon as they like took her out, he's just like eating his cigarette. and dancing. I know that mood, mate. I'll go quickly. One one, I know. Top three. First, 1999 Fish played a festival at the Oswego County Airport. Wow. Wow. It was the biggest fish show ever at that time. Airport concert. Yeah. I was fucking... Those are big. No, it was like three days. So you camped.

I had, I was working for the Anheiser Bush distributor, so I had this like, I had access to this backstage area. Okay. It was fucking fantastic, man. Everyone was just doing nitrous. Is that whipets? Is that what nitrists? Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. So you're sucking in whipped cream cans. Yeah. And it was great because all my friends from my hometown were there, but also like a ton of my college friends came up. It was fucking just a great experience. Number two, I will say just for the music, I saw St.

Germain, which is, I don't know if you guys know, it's like an electronic artist. Yeah. But dude, I saw. me before. Yeah, it's fucking great. And I saw him, but it was all live. So it's like this DJ who makes this music, but he brings in musicians that actually play the music. He's like an older guy.

Cool. Oh, that's awesome, yeah. So we had like a 20 piece band and it was just hypnotic. Like literally like to where you're like floating and like nobody fucked up. You weren't stoned? A little bit. Drinking? I was hitting a hash pen with my buddy.

Yeah, dude. I mean, when you get high at a concert, it's a whole different world. And my girlfriend at the time was at the show and kept talking to me. And, like, kept, like, breaking me out of it. And I was just like, like, stop. Please stop talking. Third was I went to see Black Rebel Motorcycle Club at, like, this festival with, like, 10 other bands. But they were headlining.

They're a fucking great, like, rock band. Yeah. And so the ninth band comes up. They go on. The 10th band, they go to announce it was supposed to be the band I was there to see. it's not them. What? They announced this other band.

I'm like, what the fuck is going on? Literally take out my phone, Google it. The drummer for BRMC had just been diagnosed with brain tumors that morning. Oh, my God. So they pulled out, obviously, and brought in this other band called The Black Angels. Yeah. Ooh, it was like by far my favorite band now. Oh, no way.

I had never heard of them. You introduced me to those guys. They played, like, the best set I've ever seen. Oh, wow. And they have like seven albums. Every song's amazing. Yeah. Yeah, I highly recommend Black.

It's a good vibe. You played on, like, his record player at his place. Oh, yeah. Yeah. That was before we smashed all my records. Oh, yeah, I've heard that story. Yeah. Worst, 1997, I was in high school.

The band Goldfinger, the band was playing. I met her Sunday that was yesterday. One of my favorite bands of all the time. They're great, yeah. Love Goldfinger. Bad concert? Here's what happened. It was at a place called Lemoyne Manor in Syracuse.

Tons of vans full of people from my high school, because we all had driver's licenses then. where people were just packing in their mom's minivan, so like 50 of us went up. Yeah. We get there. It's basically a basement. And in this basement, there's five or six structural metal poles that just go up through the crowd. And it's a massive mosh pit.

Right. And we had like 50 dudes from like my football team there. Sure. Just hitting things. Brutal. Everyone was at the end of the thing just caked in just so many different people's blood. Yeah. People like bonking heads off these poles.

It was a disaster. Yeah. No, that's no good. That's my worst. That's worse in my story. I mean, yours is worse. Yours is funny. Mine's more embarrassing, for sure.

Yours is definitely embarrassing, but Pat's introduced probably a lot of people to some good bands, so that's good. Okay. I highly recommend. What do you got, Reteb? My third pick, I was actually at a concert with our buddy Joe and Pat. We saw the luminaires at the Hollywood Bowl. I like luminaires a lot. Drink a bottle of wine.

took two hits of weed, literally ended up at a diner at 9 a.m. I don't remember much. I remember a few of the songs. They were really good. I remember the feeling, the vibe, and the energy, and then I just kind of came to later in the morning and the concert started at 9 or something.

Well, dude, here's the cool thing about this show. Oh, you were at the Luminary's concert? Yeah, he was with me, Pat. Hollywood Bulls is this huge venue, so you can be like a mile away from the stage. Yeah. Where you have to look at the screen, right? Gotcha.

But we're like, so, the first half saw the really expensive seats. Okay. Then there's a big landing area, and then we were the first row in the second half. Okay. So, but we were still real far from the stage. Sure. Yeah. They do a little set break, and I see

a bunch of action going on. I'm like, wait, they're setting up like a thing up here. Yeah. They came up to the halfway point, and no further from me to Retep played three songs. No, what? For the back half. Wow. And it was like two of the three were like their biggest hits. No way. It was amazing. So action?

Yeah, yeah, they did a little ho-haired right there. Wow. That's big time. So that's my number three. My number two, Tom Petty, seen him twice, man. He's so fucking good. I mean, like, even I saw him basically a few months before he passed and so fucking on point every song.

Like, I mean, I couldn't believe he looked frail, but like his voice, just like fucking perfect booming. Loving. Totally on point. And then my number one, man, I saw fucking Jack Woll. white and he is fucking ridiculous. Nice. I mean, like, the white stripes.

What size was that venue? White stripes. I saw the white stripes that they did this thing called a Royal Seco outside of the Rose Bowl here in L.A. So it's a big venue. It was a big stage. It was the main show. And, dude, like, I mean, fucking, the guy is like an incredible musician. The fucking drums is that it was so good.

I mean, he's singing, playing the drums. Anybody can sing perfectly and fucking play the drums, man? That is like two separate sides of the brain. Yeah, it really is. You know the band, the band? Yeah, yeah. The main singer is the drummer. And he's fucking, he's so goddamn good.

Oh, cool, I didn't know that. And then my dad fucking last, this is going to sound awful. But I was again at the Hollywood Bowl. I went with the girlfriend at the time and her family, and it was like a thing for breast cancer awareness. A bunch of, it was like fucking Ariana Grande was there and a bunch of like female singers. Uh-huh.

And, dude, it was just a shit show. We got there late. My fault, so I was being frowned upon the entire night. But nothing better than being frowned upon by your girlfriend's family. Yeah, that was terrible. That feels good. Or nothing worse than going to an Ariana Grande concert. Ariana Grande was so fucking bad that she legitimately apologized and said she had a cold to the crowd.

Oh, no way. Yeah. Oh, wow. And so that was my DFL experience. Yeah, that's bad. Nothing groundbreaking. No, I like those stories. Forrest DFL definitely wins.

It was so much fun until that moment, too, though. For whatever reason, it's the cigarettes and the headbands. Yeah, that's what does it. It's bad. It's the picture you painted for sure. Yeah, no showering, went to the volleyball tournament all day. It was a mess. Yeah.

Is it? It is. It's time. Let's get it. Let's go. Sound effect. Do we have a sound effect for this? Yeah.

How about, uh... Okay. All right. All right. Listen, I don't have the same media board I had on Riverside. I got to set it up. You got to set up, battle! Yeah.

It's as high as like, you go. Whoa. There you go. Yeah, let's get that media board set up. Patrick, you said you had a good one. I think Anna Katanis? Atta. Or Anika tennis.

Anika tennis. I thought this was good. I don't have my pad and paper in the new studio where I write down when everybody's... You have a laptop. You'll be clicking pens in no time. What else do you do with two fingers? My mom and I love the podcast, says Annika. Okay.

Tennis. I came up with a pretty cool new game segment or Battle Rail idea. It's called Animals Run the World. Basically, humans, I'm going to skip a couple things. Okay, here's the thing. You have to, humans go extinct. Animals are taking over humans, jobs. You must build a team.

Assign an animal to each of the three jobs I've chosen and explain why they would do it. She chooses the jobs? She's chosen the job. So I'm going to list them, and then you have to fit a job. animals into these boxes. Okay. Okay. A handyman. Okay. An accountant. Oh, wow. And a fashion model. This could be every battle royal just with different jobs. Just with different jobs. This is a really clever one. Good call, Anika Teneas. Yeah. Fashion model. Wait, God damn it. Someone's going to take my pick. Who goes first? You pick. Are we doing a snake draft? We sure are. Okay. Fuck it. I'm going

first. I'm going first. I'm going to go last then because I want two at once. Look, this as topical. We just talked about it. I'm going to pick my accountant. Okay. You son of a bitch, I'm picking a crow. Crow.

We've just proven that crows are geniuses at math, second only to the ancient Aztecs and Mayans. Okay. They understand the concept of zero, which is very important.

That is. You know what I mean? You have to know zero if you're going to be an accountant. So I've taken, right now, I have, as my accountant, the only animal

that we know understands the concept of zero, I've already won. Peter, you're up for one pick. Why? I thought I was going to go third. I can go second. Yeah, go second. I want two picks at once. All right, you know what, in the spirit of what Patrick is doing, I'll pick my accountant first to match his. All right.

Mine, look, if you're going to an accountant and they have a southern accent, are you hiring them? I sure would. No, you wouldn't. You wouldn't do it. You're going to hire someone. Stomble to the camera. It's so weird. He's hoping people from the south are related to him right now. Yeah.

In fact, I would only hire them in that case. Oh, my God. He's literally talking to the camera. Yeah. All right. I'm not. Okay. I'm not hiring an Australian.

They're too silly. Canadian. Not hiring a German, they're too comical. Okay. I'm going to hire a nice Brit. A nice dry Brit. A dry Brit animal. Yep.

So I'm going for an English badger. Don't know if you've ever seen an English badger. There's a lot of images where they're They have like a monocle on their face. Yeah. Ah, they're very proper. Very proper. Okay.

Seems like a, it seems like an upright accountant. So I'm going for an English badger. Okay. I understand your logic. I don't, but that sounds like an answer I would come up with somehow. But you're going to take herpes as your account. I'm not. It's not herpes.

I'm going with my fashion model first. Or European badger is what I meant. Sorry. Anyway, go ahead. Okay. So not a dry Brit. A dry European. Yeah.

Okay. Same thing. Offending so many people. I'm okay with it. So my fashion model is going to be, I'll give you a hint. It's got a big hump on its back. The camel. That was also mine.

Yeah, of course it was. Oh, because the Botox. The Botox, and they're already in beauty contests. They win millions for people. Interesting. Good luck getting to fit garments over that hump. Hey, listen. That's a good, smart call on both you.

I hadn't even crossed my mind. I'm going to pin my garments. Dude, it's going to wear multiple garments. Oh, I see. It's going to have those big eyelashes. Just like, you're going to put like at least two mil and bococs into it. Yeah. I mean, look at camel cigarettes.

It worked for them. Sure. All right. Don't smoke, kids. My second one is going to be the handyman. And this is just, I mean, it's super obvious. I'm going to pick, because they can use tools. I'm picking a fucking chimpanzee to be my handyman.

Yeah, yeah. That adds up. They're good picks. This is the most logical. two picks you've made in 64 podcasts. Yeah, how you haven't just said octopus and herpes three times. It's different. It's different more not on a Zoom call, mate.

Yeah, you panic on Zoom. Yeah, you do. Okay, I'm up next for one. See, I know how a snake giraffe works. Fashion model. When I think of a fashion model, I think of a beautiful woman with long legs, very elegant, very tall, I think giraffe.

Yeah. Yep, they're stunning. A tall giraffe. Yeah, they're lovely. They're very feminine. Even a male giraffe to me is very feminine. Well, yeah, and partly I think because it looks like they're wearing eyeliner. Yep, yep. Okay.

That's it for me. Oh, right. Okay, so I'm up for two. Yep. So I've got accountants. I've already won't have. The crow, undeniably. Yeah, it's pretty good.

Handyman. Now, does Retepe own all primates? Nope. Nope. I think you can branch just no chimps. You know what? No. No, I am going to take the octopus. I have seen octopus using tools.

I've seen videos of them taking rocks and bashing open. I don't know what the fuck it was. Like, like, shielding themselves between. They're very clever. We know they're brilliant. Obviously, they come from space.

So they can use tools. And not to mention, hey, I need you to fix my garbage disposal. And also at the same time, change that light bulb. They have eight arms. Yeah, that's true. They can do a lot at the same time.

If they handgun who has eight arms, that's very quick. So that's going to be... Now, this next one's a bit controversial, but I think it's going to win this for me. Oh, interesting. Fashion model. Fashion model? The fashion industry, high fashion, takes a lot of heat

for the fact that they tend to use these rail-thin models. Victoria's Secret just killed the Angels campaign. Really? No. Yeah. Really? Yeah, the whole Victoria's Secret Angel every year,

the thing that every 14-year-old boy used to look forward to. Right. She gone. It's done. It's so sad. Yeah, but high fashion, most of my clients as a fashion, you know, when I lease out my fashion model, are going to be these European companies, Gucci product. They use rail-thin, wayfish type of models.

Sure. I need my model to book a lot of work. That's fair. That's fair. I am going to take the animal that has the closest physique to a human fashion model. A praying mantis. They're very slender. They have thin legs. You won't have to redesign anything.

Obviously, the outfits will have to be smaller. Very small. I'm not sure that you wouldn't have to redesign anything. I think they'll just fit right in. They might, you know, just kind of... Well, maybe one set of legs could just kind of be pinned down. Maybe not redesign it, but I mean, you're going to have to shrink it down to honey-ishroft the kids size. It's going to look good on those slender physiques, man.

That's true. They are, they're very nimbly built. Yeah. You guys, you guys ever seen the tiny cooking channels on YouTube? I imagine to make a sure fashion model make a good shit. Exactly. One of those channels. Would they make the little food?

Yeah, tiny food, tiny silverware. So as a fashion model, I don't know if we've ever mentioned this or not, but the female praying mantis always kills and eats their male after mating. Yeah, they like bite the head off, right? And eat them, yeah. So that's fun. You'll be the male, so your head's going, May. Sorry, who went next?

You're up, you're up. Don't you know how to do a snake? I do. I just didn't remember who went next. Okay. I'm next. I'm next. I'm next.

My handyman is an obvious choice. It is nature's hands. Handyman? It's the beaver. I'm going to cut down the beans. Build some dams. That's a damaging pick to us. Fuck off. I mean, think about it. It's nature's handyman. Yeah. It's the lumberjack to the animal

world. I can build a dam. I can build a burrow. I can cut down a tree. You name it. It says Handyman, not carpenter. Okay. Okay, praying mantis model. All right. Finish it off. How are you going to ruin your otherwise logical team? I'm definitely not going to ruin it.

I've got a camel as my fashion model, a chimpanzee as my handyman. And as my accountant, I'm going to have a very well-trained horse who can tap count beans. You've seen this, right? Oh, boy. Horses can do math. Horse, is it horses or horse? It's hearse. Please continue. Yes, there's a very famous study or something where a guy taught a horse to do math. He could tap his foot as many times as necessary to receive the reward. So therefore, horses, my accountant will be able to do our math where we make $4 a month. By four taps.

Man, it's a pity because you were stacking up strong. No, he's his own worst enemy. No, you guys have never seen the fucking foot-tapping horse. Everybody else has. Where am I looking? Yes, horse tap their feet each time they walk. Shut your mouth. They count.

They count. All right. Let me recap, Brosters. Why don't you go weigh in. Let us know. Comment right here on this YouTube video, comment on the iTunes download. If you're not watching us, which if you're not, you should be. Because this is lovely.

We have a new studio. It's great. This is the Battle Royale. Forrest picked the beaver as his handyman. The European Badger as his accountant. And the lovely slender giraffe is his model. Patrick picked the crow as his accountant. Very Good's pick.

The octopus is his handyman. and the delightful praying mantis as his fashion model. Peter came in strong with the camel as his fashion model. And it's strong. Had the handyman as a chimp, one of the only creatures to use tools, adds up. Unlike his accountant, the horse, which apparently can count to three. So that's something. Yeah, I didn't know that, but I still don't.

It's interesting. I still don't know it, yeah. But weigh in, let us know. Guys, we have this beautiful new studio. Yeah. It's world-class. People are tuning in, I hope, I hope more than ever. Make this, make sure, guys, if you're watching this at home, make sure that you give this the most views.

I don't know how that works, but just do it. Tell us a friend, too. Tell a friend, tell a family member. A lot of people have, go to the Wild Timespodcast.com. Tell your mom, tell your dad. Butkin, find the video on YouTube. Find the Patreon. Find the merch.

Find everything there. Merch. Check it out. We got it. It's awesome. What's the show? Where do you go to the shop? Shop. The Wild Times Podcast.

for all the merch, baby. The good stuff. The goods. This one right here, too. Yep. That one's selling like hotcakes. Thank you to all the patrons. You are a big part of the reason why we have the studio.

For those who don't know, you'll still get this one every week. But if you want a bonus podcast for a month, check out. We love you. It's spicy. Love you guys. Good night.

Hold on. I got to find the outro. Oh, my God. Oh, yeah. Yeah, baby. This feels good. I'm looking at my camera even though it's not selected. Don't do it, don't do it. It's so awkward.

I'm just going to keep looking at it. First one in the stew. Let's see you. You make sure everything worked? Yes.