Wild Times: Wildlife Education - TWT #96 - Return of the Kings of Pain: Gnarliest Bites, Stings & Strikes Yet

Episode Date: May 23, 2022

Forrest Galante and Retep chat once again with the Kings of Pain, just in time for Season 2! Wildlife nuts Adam Thorn and Rob Alleva reveal some of the most hilarious and horrifying experiences during the filming of KOP Season 2, including scorpion stings, moray eel bites, and “scorpion squirts”. This episode is full of crazy stories and gnarly creatures - get excited for Season 2, airing on May 26th on History Channel. We love you, brosteners! TWT #96 - The Breakdown 00:00 - INTRO: Where is the jingle?! 2:01 - Introducing KINGS OF PAIN SEASON 2 (with a trailer and everything) 3:48 - Adam Thorn & Rob Alleva, S&M fiends? 5:13 - Sting 1, Season 2 KOP: “scorpion squirts” story 9:30 - Rob Alleva describes giant desert hairy scorpion sting experience 12:56 - Talking Kings of Pain behind the scenes footage of Rob’s scorpion squirts 17:37 - How not to get stung, from the experts 20:25 - What happened after sting 1?  22:09 - Rob’s unfortunate lasting effects from toxic stings 22:27 - Bristle worms  23:25 - Are the Kings of Pain still scared of pain? 24:46 - How Kings of Pain season 2 hits harder than season 1 26:06 - The one bite Rob and Adam turned down 26:15 - Forrest Galante’s GNARLY as f***k moray eel story 29:37 - Venomous Moray eels?! 33:00 - Kings of Pain most feared animals 33:57 - Adam’s Orange Baboon Tarantula experience 38:05 - Rob’s Giant Desert Centipede sting  40:03 - What Kings of Pain and the pain index does for education and conservation 42:56 - Rob Alleva’s favourite show (besides Extinct or Alive, obviously) 44:45 - Kings of Pain do STINGING SHARKS?! 47:25 - The Wild Times crew causes problems for Kings of Pain producers 50:26 - Unboxing the KOP Pain Idex poster! 53:05 - Kings of Pain SEASON 2 launch info - May 26th 2022  54:06 - BATTLE ROYAAAAAAALE, Animal Superpower Edition Rules: Choose 3 animal abilities to take on - a sting, a bite, and a special ability (strike, punch, electrocution etc) - to battle each other in a stadium *Snake draft 56:06 - Retep’s first pick: bite of a paper-shredder mouth of a Moray eel  56:42 - Adam’s first pick: bite of a beaded lizard 57:27 - Robs first pick: electric abilities of an electric eel 57:52 - Forrest’s first & second pick: acid shooting abilities of a bombardier beetle, and sting of a scorpion fish 59:01 - Rob’s second pick: bite of the reticulated python 59:28 - Adam’s second pick: punching abilities of a mantis shrimp 1:00:24 - Retep’s second & third pick: malaria-infecting abilities of a mosquito and “sting” (pinch) of a desert hairy scorpion 1:02:16 - Adam’s third pick: sting of an irukandji jellyfish 1:03:05 - Rob’s third pick: sting of a Portuguese man-of-war 1:03:42 - Forrest’s third pick: bite of a komodo dragon 1:04:38 - BR Creature Recap 1:05:32 - OUTTRO & where to find MORE Kings of Pain @adam_thorn @cavemanrob Kings of Pain Season 2, airing 26th May on History Channel Brosteners, make sure you comment and vote who you think made the gnarliest creature - good luck with this mess, Dave Sunshine… Leave a review on iTunes Apple Podcast: https://thewildtimespodcast.com/itunes-review/  Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/wildtimespod/  Official Website: https://thewildtimespodcast.com/  Info: https://thewildtimespodcast.com/info  Merch: https://thewildtimespodcast.com/merch  Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/wildtimespod 

Are you okay? Where's the sound? I'm waiting for the jingle. Oh, God, I forgot about the jingle. It's the best intro we've ever done. Am I okay? I'm sitting there with this awkward look on my face. Like, where is the jingle?

Where is the jingle? I know, yeah. Oh, my goodness. All right, we are back. It's the Wild Times podcast, the greatest show on the air, the only show in the world that combines the fun and fancy

of the outdoors, with adventure, with entertainment and comedy, and all kinds of shenanigans. I'm your host, the broologist, Forrest Galante, and thank God the producer isn't here tonight. That's so great. I think he's diddling, diddling being the keyword. What's his name? Not Liam Neeson. Who's he working with?

Kyle? No. The famous guy that he's doing the TV show. Kevin Costner, man. Liam Neeson. What the hell is he? Whatever, like some older grumpy guy, I don't remember. I think it's busy with a

I blew that joke but joining me as always the one and only PhD in pondcasting the professor Mr. Peter Fitzer I know you didn't have the applause ready what's going on Peter? Yes I am indeed the professor

with a PhD in pond casting as Forrest said No no I'm a little disappointed It's just me and you It seems pretty boring Just to be me you. I mean... Right. Like, why would someone tune in to watch a podcast of just two guys who don't

have that much common ground? Don't really like each other at all. I mean... Very little. The fact that I came to your wedding, I came there as a joke and I had a good time, which was unfortunate because you wore like a clown costume. It was absurd. I did. Yeah, I was the only groomsman in a clown costume, but let's not dolly, diddle dolly, what is it, dolly dattle? We got things to talk about. We got things to do. Dilly Dally Dally. Dilly Dally, that's what I'm looking for. Joining us today, drumroll, because I know we don't have one. Very special guests who will get to talk about everything this time. Play the trailer. In 83, entomologist Dr. Justin Schmidt began ranking stinging insects on a scale from one to four. He put himself in harm's way for science. Now, Adam Thorne and Caveman.

man Rob Aleva are taking Schmidt's index further. Rob, do it. Adding venomous bite. Oh, it's a tarantula! And more deadly creatures. Yikes. They're a lot more potent. A lot more potent.

Their goal to create history's ultimate guide to pain. That was way worse than I thought. If you're going down, I'm going down with you. I like that. Yeah. There we go. Welcome back, Adam and Rob, joining us on The Wild Times. You guys are absolutely out of your fucking minds.

You know that? I know I said that last time we were on the show together, but just to see that trailer, like, I got like the goosebumps going on now. I feel like I need a shower after watching that to feel less creepy. Rob looked like he was getting down with himself in one of those shots, though. Did you have any choice over editorial here? Let's get serious for a minute.

Let me ask you guys a question. No. Oh, okay. Yeah. No, I'm serious. I want to know this. Are you both into S&M? Is that what this is about? Like, is there a sexual component to this?

Adam, you're nodding. There is. Tell us more. Oh, 100%. Well, I mean, I don't know if you know this, but Rob's a chronic masturbator. Yeah. Oh, God. No.

It's very sticky when he visits. I realized that in season one. And then the whole bite and steam thing mixed with that, I kind of clued on to it that, yeah, he's on this show for a sexual pleasure. Not only did he share a 10, but we pitched a 10, you know?

Yeah, no, it's a way to sell a show. You know, anything, anything, as they say in the TV world, and I know,

because we deal with this all the time, anything loud. That's loud, you know? If you're like, hey, I'm just going to get stung and beat off on TV. We're tuning in for that. No question. Oh, yeah.

Oh, yeah. It's good for like a Disney Channel lifetime. Yeah, yeah, a real Disney crowd. No, okay, so look, Kings of Pain season two, we said when you guys could talk about it, we'd have you back on the show. Now you can talk about it. Season two is coming up. It's coming out.

It's super exciting. There is no masturbating on television as far as I know. And it's on the history channel. It's not on Disney. That would be shenanigans. There's stuff coming out of other orifices. I promise you that. Tell us about it.

Tell us, Robbis. Tell us everything. Well, tell us about, start with the bum orifice. The scorpion squirts. Oh, God. Now, Forrest. Yeah. He just spit his drink.

I was so close to losing my drink. Yeah, please continue. I don't know how much is going to make it on the show. But Adam's masterpiece. with the cell phone while I was in the porta potty. Oh, no. So before this, Forrest, you've been stung by a desert hairy scorpion, correct? Unfortunately, that's correct.

Not that bad, right? No, like a shitty bee sting. Exactly what I said the first time. I got a little home video with me with a black light and getting stung by one way before Kings of Bay. And I was like, oh, it's like a bad bee sting. Yeah. So I feel guilty now. I tell Adam, it's just like a bad bee sting.

This is easing back in the season two. we're going to start off with a big scorpion that looks scary but it just doesn't do crap sure well it does do crap apparently literally so fast forward so adam gets stung by this thing we'll get to the scorpion squirts i promise adam and and my my shrunken penis oh yes they said they're shifting off limits before so we're allowed to talk so we're getting canceled history is going to cancel our podcast but please continue so So we think we're easing back in. Adam goes first with this Desert Harry Scorpion.

And since it has like not a big reputation, this thing stings them. And Adam just like lets it sting them. And the thing is just leaving the stinger in Adam longer and longer. Just pumping in that venom. Pumping venom in him. Yep. And he kind of looks at me. He's like, man, that kind of hurt more than he's embarrassed.

He's not hurt more than it's supposed to. And I'm like, I'm thinking this was. Adam's got, you know, posified in the time we've been off. know? Yeah. And then so we're like sending up for my sting and Adam's like my jaw's shaking. Like not not like out loud like to me like my jaw's shaking like what do you mean, Adam? What do you mean? It was like like like it was no way. It was cold on set, right? But this was like not cold shivers. I was like my jaw's like but blah blah blah like uncontrollable. Like when you get that little like eyebrow twitch except in your jaw. Yeah, 100%. And I'm trying to hide it because I'm embarrassed.

I'm like, this, this ain't the scorpion doing this. Surely this is not the scorpion. I'm looking at Rob. I'm like, I'm like, man, this is uncontrollable. And we kind of like, oh, it's because I haven't slept in ages because, you know, I was still kind of jet lagged from like the week it took me to get to L.A. from Australia. Right. And maybe, you know, it's no sleep.

It's a mixture of things. But like, so we kind of like didn't play on it a lot. like didn't really go, you know, oh, this is a scorpion doing this because we weren't quite sure until Rob got stung. They started doing weird stuff. You guys both got like neurological conditions. Right. So, yes. Sorry, Peter. Go ahead. No, it's it. From, from this, you know, this animal you thought was going to be like a nice ease into the show. Yep. Scary looking. Adam and I aren't super competitive. We had too much go wrong.

and one with permanent damage. Like, we're like, pretty sympathetic for each other. Okay. But this one time, and I don't think I've told Adam this before, I was like, okay, this is the first thing. I'm going to just show him up a little bit. I'm going to let this thing. It came out.

I brought it out of me, and he's over here with this jaw shattering. Like, that's just jet lag, you know? By the way, there's no normal male that doesn't think that way. Do you know what I mean? Where you're like, you're like, look, I'm not competing. with the guy, but he's a wuss, and I'm going to show him I'm tougher. You know what I mean? Like you're not going to say it out loud, but you're like, yeah, whatever, bro.

Like, I'm just going to be tougher than you on TV. So everybody's thinking that way. Just the whole time I'm going to show Adam up, right? And so this thing stings me and it doesn't hurt immediately. But it's like the volume, basically, the pain starts getting turned up and turned up. And like, I'm like past like the four or five seconds that it was in Adam. I'm like, ha, I'm going to beat him. And I'm like, man, it's really starting to hurt.

And I'm like, I am not pulling my hand away. I'm waiting for this scorpion to let go of me. It never did. I wouldn't. He's like, this guy's into this, man. This is my new shit right here. I'm about to cry. Like, it hurts somebody.

I finally pulled away. And I'm like, well, that was just dumb. I just completely screwed myself. My hand hurt bad, but super low for pain. but it was extremely painful for something that wasn't supposed to hurt that bad. Something I've been stung by before. Something I discounted. So now I'm like, maybe I turned into a whistle over the break too.

Yeah, I'm soft now. Yeah. Right. And then so Adam's talking. I'm kind of sitting here. And then also I feel my lips tingling. And I'm like, oh, my shit. This is real.

Like something's happening. Something. And so it started like, you know, Adam's jaws like doing this. weird drugs. I'm gurney. He's gurney. Like, he's on ecstasy. It started getting weird.

Like, my right arm started tingling. I took the sting on the left arm. And I'm looking at it. I'm like, can you fill your teeth? And he's like, yeah, I can fill every single teeth. Like, every tooth was like, it was like asleep. Like, when you sit on your hand and it's asleep. Oh, wow.

And the tops of our head and the bottoms of our feet. Jesus. And we're like sweating and we have chills. It was weird. It was like we were on some really awful drugs. And it's weird, too, because you, like, you were under the impression that this was just going to be an easy bite. So it was probably, like, terrifying once you literally started losing feeling in all of your body parts. We got, like, another 30 or 20 years.

I don't know how many animals we did this season. We got all these animals we're about to do. And the easy ones already is destroyed. So long story. This is sting one, correct? This is sting one. 11 hours this went on without getting better. Oh my God.

The next day, we started having cramps, hand cramps. And I'm not sure how many days for Adam, but my hand cramped up for 16 days straight, every day. Oh, my God. We're, like, moved on to, like, other episodes, and we've got to take breaks because my hand's like, oh, my God. It got weird.

I was, Adam and I text. Wait, we haven't got to the squirts yet. Oh, I don't think I've laughed so hard in my life, man. We've got this Jeep wrangler that we're using in the show. And Rob's like, dude, I'm about to shit. Can you drive me down to the porta-potties? Now, what time frame, Adam, before you continue, is this after the sting? Are you talking days later, hours later?

Like an hour maybe? Okay. Oh, so this is definitely related to the sting, not the nasty Chipotle. It would be a hell of a coincidence if it wasn't. Gotcha. Okay, okay. Sorry, so it's an hour later. your hands cramping up, you're driving around

and your Wrangler looking like Ken dolls. Adam, Rob goes, Rob goes, I got to poop. What happened to next? Well, I like, you jump with a Jeep, drive down to the porta potty's. And I'm filming from my phone because a lot of this season, there's like a diary cam stuff

and sort of behind the scenes stuff. Yeah, I love that. That's cool way. That's like, I'm all about that. Yeah. Oh, well, you'll love this one. then he runs into the porta potty and starts just unloading right and i've got the camera up against the porta potty so you can hear it right oh no you can just the the noises that were coming from that port-a-potty and the stuff rob was saying was so you poor bastard like because you were

spraying shit and it was splashing all that blue stuff up into his uh up into my worst nightmare I swear to God. I've said this before. This was a used porta potty. So I was boosted up. And like, I was sharing feces with the crew. I'm out. I got to,

I got it. I got to, I'm out. Peter, do you remember this? Talk about worst fears on the podcast. And I was like, literally my worst fear is portopody splashback.

That is my worst fear in life. In life, my worst fear. It's awful. It's awful. We got to, every time we have these guys on now, I need to start making

clips of just Forrest's reactions. It's the most fantastic thing I've ever seen. I'm such a sissy. Like, I think people think that I'm tough because I do all these outdoor things. Like, you guys are, no, God, this is just, well. Anyway, okay, so yeah, you're getting these sounds. You're recording it on the iPhone.

Yeah, but some of the stuff he was saying, he was just like, oh, no, oh, no. It was like, oh, the humanity. But then he goes, like, I'm filming. And he doesn't know I'm filming, right? Right. Right. And he's like,

yeah, yeah. I doubt that I would use that bit in this in this show because he was like, man, my penis is so small right now. It's shrunk and so small. It hasn't been this shriveled up since my rattlesnake by. Oh, man. I am going to use that.

I am going to personally text David Carr, who if for anybody listening, is the producer of the show who also produced a show for me, I'm going to personally text and tell them if this doesn't make the show, you are sending me this and we are putting it on YouTube. Like I this needs to, the world needs to see this. I have it.

It's on my phone. Oh my God. Done. Oh my God. Email to me right now, exclusive. Yeah. Oh my God. That is wild.

Rob, you're sitting in there. You're getting all the splashback. Obviously, Adam's filming even though you don't realize it. How sheepishly are you leaving that port-a-potty? Oh, I had no idea what was waiting for me. Yeah. I'm thinking, this is a little embarrassing, but Adam knows me. But Adam has gathered a crowd.

Nice. Congratulations, Adam. The very nice play. The line producer, two ambulances full of paramedics. Oh, no. All gathered around. Oh, no, no. It's so good.

Are there any? Are there any? Are there in? Oh, no. Oh, no. this cat's, yeah, yeah. Dude, are there women on your crew? This is day one.

Are there women on your crew? See, I'm old school like that. You know what? Some of them left after that. I don't know. I would imagine so. Like, if I go out on my boat fishing or diving or whatever, I'll poop off the back of the boat with four dudes in the boat.

If there's like a woman on board, I, I won't poop. Like, it doesn't happen. I just, I can't do it. I'm like, I'm such a private shit. I remember I had a female housemate for a while. And I used to go out to the shopping center up the road to take. you don't because I didn't want to do it in the same house. It's not a pleasant experience.

I'm right there with you, Adam. So, uh, so, wow. So are you, standing ovation? That's hilarious. Go ahead, Peter.

Are you, are you, uh, traumatized after this? Like, are you said you lost all trust in Adam after this on day one of, of season two. So,

I can't trust Adam. I can't trust the animals. This little beast thing that just wrecked us. They're little cramps. They're like, you want to go on to the next scorpion? You're like, no, hell no. I want to quit the show immediately.

Well, the next scorpion was an Arizona bark scorpion. So it's like, it's a bad one to jump to. So how long after the first one was the second one? Hold on. Hold on. I'm sorry. Before we move on, I got to ask some questions here. Because I am fascinated by all of this and not just the fecal side of it.

But so what was the Desert Harry rated on the Schmidt Index? or was it not? He only does bees wasp and ants on his index. Say that again? He only does hymenopterus, so bees, wasp, and ants. That's the only thing. Okay, okay, okay. So I'm going to go out on a limb here, and you guys are the experts.

Tell me what you think. When I got stung by a desert hairy, it was like, ow, pull your hand away. It's over, right? You're sitting there, like, suffering it, letting it pump as much venom as it once into you. Was it repeat stinging or was it just leaving the stinger in? just in and just pumping. See, that's, it's got to be, man. And that's got to be

what the difference is, right? Because when you get stung by something, you pull away and, you know, you get a small amount of that venom and that toxin into your bloodstream or whatever. But you guys are sitting there, like, allowing as much as this animal's body can produce to enter into your system. 100%. He's just like, yep.

Yeah. But it's interesting because I think. That was a good lesson. If we had started off with the Arizona Bar Scorp, we probably would have done the same thing. And when we moved on to the Arizona Barks Scorpion, after that experience, we let it sting us for a good amount

that we thought would be a more natural time to get stuck. Yeah. We didn't let it stay in us a naturally pumping venom because, I mean, it has killed people. So that experience with the Arizona Barks, sorry, with the Giant Desert Harry Scorpion may have kept us from a medical emergency and gave us a more accurate average,

Invenomation with the Arizona Barks Cropian. I think that's important for our listeners, though. I mean, outside of the comedy and the poop nonsense, there is actual information that you need to digest here, which even as myself, as a wildlife biologist, I think of a snake bite, I think of a bee sting, whatever it is, as an absolute, right? It's like black or white. You're stung or you're not stung.

You're envenomated or you're not envenomated. But that's really not the case. And it's funny because I'm like having my own revelation right now just talking to you guys. it really is about like time under venom. You know what I mean? And it's like the amount of venom that's put into your system is going to affect how much you have that reaction. And like I said, I've never really thought about it that way.

You know, I've been tagged by a couple venomous snakes and it's been very quick. And I've, you know, and I've treated it and everything else. And had I let it chew on me for a while, it probably would have been a different outcome. And it's just, it's interesting for people to realize that. There are a lot of reptile keepers that listen to this podcast. There are a lot of insect keepers, so on and so forth. So it's just something, maybe I'm the only idiot who hadn't considered this. But really, there's something to be said there.

It's like, you know, get away from that venom. Like, don't let it continue in any means possible. Don't let it seep into a wound, whatever it is. No sane person is not trying to get away from this immediately. Well, that's why we have these two on. They're outliers for sure. I'll say that. So what happened next? I mean, we're not going to go through every single sting and bite, because that would be a 15-hour podcast. But you're talking about the next Scorpion. How's the compounding effect?

Not good. Yeah. Yeah, I believe it. It's such a great answer. I mean, what else could you say? It's, it's. Oh, man. Yeah, because we were under sort of a tight, very tight film schedule. We were doing back-to-back things like basically daily. It was crazy. And not only that, it was, we were doing way more toxic animals than we did in season one. So by the end of it, when we did the first podcast with, with, with, with, use, like, we'd just finish filming. Like, we just finished filming.

Like, that was like the last day or something. Right. And, um, I think it was literally your last day. I think you had filmed that day if I don't know. Yeah. And you guys looked a lot more weathered than you do now. They really did. I swear to God.

You felt good. Yeah. We were trashed. We were messed up. Yeah. Essentially. Yeah, sorry, go ahead. No, I mean, we were doing animals that have killed people.

So we were like, it wasn't just that. It was just like, we don't know what the build up of all this venom in such a short period of time. does to your organs and things like that. So we'll pretty much just sit and going, when's our kidney is going to shut down, you know? Yep. Dude, that's scary, too. I mean, we're joking about it, but that's fucking, I'd be terrified of that.

Yeah, but you're terrified of everything. You're scared of toilet water. You just told us. That's true. What, have you had any lasting effects that you guys have noticed? Any, like, brain fogginess, any achy joints, you know, I'm trying to think what things seem like a blingered. Rob's penis never came back.

Right. It's just always like that. I was just like a little. Yeah. Cold out, nope, just really small. This is not a big,

but if you can see right there, there's like a raised bump on my finger. It wasn't three months since, it was from the bristle worms. And we did a bunch of bristle worms. We did, we probably had a hundred or more. I don't know how many we had in the smaller thing.

And we just, it's hard to tell fireworms from other species. So we just got to. a bunch of them and dumped them in there. And it looked like our hands have been dunked in fiberglass. And most of it came out, but one of them hurt kind of going in. And I have taken this little extra skin off with fingernail clippers, try to pull out any bristles from these bristle worms that might be left,

thought I've gotten it, and then it'll come back. Comes back, like a big callousy lump. I've had that from my cactus hairs. Yeah. Very similar. I'm just happy. it's just one because we had hundreds, if not thousands of those bristles in us.

Do you get desensitized? Like, are you scared of pain any longer? Does it still, is it still scary each time? Or are you like, yeah, whatever? It goes both ways. Sometimes I know Adam and I both seem to accept, okay, we're getting bitten by this today. And we don't get nervous until the animal comes out.

We're like, oh, crap, I forgot we're doing this today. You know? Because, but we are probably the opposite. Picture, like, you come out of a haunted house and someone says, hey, you might jump. Right. Yeah. Like, we have that haunted house effect where we just, like, we just went through pain.

We've had permanent damage season one. A scorpion that wasn't supposed to do anything like, you know, had toilet water splashing up our butts and messed us up for two weeks. Diary cam. So we are jumpy. I think I can speak for both of us. We got really jumpy season two because we didn't know what was coming next. We couldn't take anything for granted.

There's a lot. This is, there's a lot of, it's similar to Jackass. You guys ever watch Jackass, the movie? It's like everybody is on edge, on set, and also now you're using the diary cams and pranking each other. So what shows evolve, right? Like my show, Extincter Alive, season one, the plan was never to have a bunch of crew in it. And then because they were all became like my closest friends, by season two, like the team

was strongly featured in almost every episode, right? what's what can the viewers of kings of pain season two expect as far as like a change from season one well it's all in the same location it was all done in uh in the u.s so we're not traveling which sucked for a for rob and i because we loved the travel aspect of it but at the end of the day it allowed us to get basically all the animals we wanted bar a few um and do more dangerous animals because we're in one location we're you know we're close to we're 40 minutes out of LA you know we've got dr. Ben may's got all his medical stuff there we're not in the middle of the jungle so we could do more dangerous animals which was kind of like bitter

sweet but we'll get the animal bought to us some of the animals we could hunt for locally but most of them we got bought to us. So there's like these cool unboxing scenes where we walk up because we don't know what the animal looks like. We've only asked for, we want this animal and this size, but we don't know. We're unboxing them and we're bringing them out. Sometimes it's a lot bigger than we would have liked.

Oh, God. How many times did you just say no? Did that ever happen? Did you ever unbox something and just go, no. It's just absolutely. not the more a eel i we we went not we ain't doing that yeah we so i've been bitten by a morayil um and it actually i shouldn't say that i got remotely scratched by a more a eel and my dad i'll tell the whole story fuck it this is a place a podcast about getting bitten so when i was a kid uh my family

i grew up in zimbabwe my family used to go on vacation to moseambique okay that was like our go to the lake version, right? Because it's like the country next door. It's, you know, it's like going to Mexico from the U.S. Like, you go to Mozambi for the beach. And so when I was a kid, we were on this vacation. We were on Benguera Islands, a little island there. And my dad would always like snorkel around and pick up shells and sea urchin spines and, you know, stuff like that to bring and show my sister and I. And we're sitting on the beach. I remember it vividly. And my dad's snorkeling. And sorry, my sister and mom are sitting on the beach. I'm snorkeling with my dad. And he reaches down into a hole.

And all I see is just this massive like twisting and blood and sand and this crazy thing. Well, what's happened is he's reached down to pick up like a cowrie shell. I don't remember it's a cowrie. We reached down to pick up a shell. And this moray sees these little piggly wiggly fingers coming down, lashes out, and grabs onto my dad's finger. But not like here at the tip, like all the way up by his knuckle. And if you don't know, for our viewers that are watching this and not just listening, Moray eels have interlocking, recurved, backwards-facing teeth, and several rows of them.

So, you know, it's one thing to get bitten by something with, you know, a couple knives in their mouth or some needle points. These things are like a paper shredder. And my dad sticks his hand in, and now you guys probably know this, but it's for our viewers. The worst thing you can do and the most instinctual thing to do is pull your finger out, pull your hand out. Right? if he had pushed it forward, the more he likely would have released. But instead, like a normal person feeling pain, he ripped his finger backwards, pulling the eel and his finger out at the same time.

And I remember seeing the eel swim out. And as a little kid, it was like, it was like a horror scene, right? There was just blood in the water. And we were like 10 feet from the beach. So he came on the beach. But his finger, we had to go get it. He had to go get tendons stitched up, everything else. It looked like bits of shredded paper from going through this Moray eel's mouth.

And I remember this to this day. My mom, my dad's name was Ted. My mom was just like, Ted, you idiot. And like, he's sitting there with this like shredded finger. And my mom's like, Ted, you idiot. And she's like calling him an idiot. My dad's like basically in tears with this like bone dangling finger. Oh my goodness.

Yeah. As a kid, it was like a horror scene to witness. So anyway, long story short, I got nicked by a moray, nothing like that. I wouldn't fucking take a moray bite. Not after seeing that as a kid. No, no way. And seeing those teeth, yeah, that was a white. That's an animal you look at and you're like, no, I'm not going to do it.

Like, you can look at a scorpion thing with stingers and a normal mouth, but you look at that thing and you may as well stick your hand into a wood chipper. I mean, ultimately, ultimately we did get people. No way. Jesus. We did. So you said no, and then David Carr came along and David Carr came along and David Carred you guys, right? And then you guys were like, yes, I'll do it. He is.

Let's do branch. I mean, no, we originally got a far bigger green moray. We were like, we aren't doing that. That's too big. That will do some probably, very real chance of doing permanent damage. Yeah. So we went for a small yellowhead moray, which are purportedly venomous to a certain degree. They have toxins that are on there.

Well, apparently, yeah, I mean, what is it, all mores? Most morays have some sort of toxin. Some species have been confirmed to have what's called club cells in their skin, which produces toxins, and that gets in the mucus, and the mucus gets on their skin. Got it, got it, got it. It is very debated, but I'll tell you what, the reason Adam and I picked this challenge is I was just scratched by Morial in Hawaii one time,

and it hurt like hell for two or three hours. And you hear that story from fishermen and everybody. It hurts way more than it should. Yeah. And fishermen know what getting bitten by fish feels like. So we wanted to test that. Now, if there's, if we ever, Adam and I ever whisked out, this was the one. I mean, we wrapped our hand and like some stuff to keep the loray from, from tearing us.

Like, we were, we were super cautious with this one. Because what happened to your dad? He had to get tendons. Yeah, yeah. Oh, he was, his vacation was over. It was all stitched up and blah, blah, blah, blah. Ted. I mean, come on, dad.

Come on, dad. But yeah, no, from memory, he was fine, you know, like, but it was just, I remember as a kid, it looked terrible. But it was mostly, you know, it wasn't a huge bore. And his bone wasn't sticking out. I'm exaggerating for the sake of storytelling. But, you know, it looked bad. And, yeah, he was okay. But his vacation was over.

Like, that was it. He was just miserable for the remainder of the holiday. I mean, it was like, it was the hard. animal we had to get beaten by just handling the bloody thing. It was almost basically impossible to get bitten by. Because we couldn't grab it. It was just flipping everywhere. So basically, we just had to do the thing we didn't want to do. And that was let the moray bite us. Because when it can bite us, it can bite anywhere it wants to. And we didn't, we didn't want to get to that. But that's ultimately what we had to do. You put your hand in a tank? How did that? Yeah. Okay.

Yeah, pretty much. Just put your hand in there and... Will it go to town or does it just latch on one bite or does it do multiple bites or... It can do whatever the hell it wants to do. That is scary as fun. It was luckily, it didn't want to buy us. Nothing to do it. It was like, yeah, we had to pretty much make it feel threatened and it got defensive and bit us. But hey, it could have latched on.

it could have bit multiple times. It could have, we were at the mercy of the eel. I mean, we were at the mercy of all these animals. Mercy of the eel. That should be the name of the episode. Was that the creature that you were most terrified of, like going into? No. No.

No. It was okay. The big dream or a was. That was just like a hard no. Yeah. So what was? What thing were you just like? It was scariest for me because it reminded me of the python.

We don't want to get it might wherever it can. And we had to go with that. Yep. Okay. So what animal were you just like, oh, man, tomorrow taking a honey badger to the nut sack like I'm in trouble, whatever it was. Like what was your thing that you were just sitting there like sweating bullets over? Well, that was probably 50% of them were alive.

Well, I, yeah, sorry, go ahead. We had a little special this season where Adam and I got to surprise each other with nice, with our own episode. that's amazing I don't think it was much of a surprise because we know each other's phobias Oh God Adam had a really bad reaction to the tarantula

We did in season one His arm swelled up Oh yeah He had a broken bone We talked about that last time Uh huh So being in his best friend I decided to put two tarantulas on

Oh God You are terrible human being That's like what It wasn't just It wasn't just any two tarantulas He fucking chucked the orange baboon tarantula in there. Yeah.

Tell us about it. Well, it's a, it's an old world tarantula, and old world tarantula is a pretty nasty venom. I mean, we're not talking deadly to humans per se, but, uh, really, like the venom's horrible. And orange baboon tarantula is a notorious for, I mean, I don't like calling animals aggressive ever. I mean, I would say they're defensive. but OBTs, as a lot of people call them, orange babooned tarantile or orange bitey thing,

they will leave their enclosure and to bite you. Like they will launch. They teleport people say because you see them and then they disappear and they reappear on your head and they're biting the shit out of you. So big, big boy too. Okay. Yeah. So what was it like?

huge, but their bite and everything about their attitude is enormous. Take a look at these fangs, dude. Crazy. Crazy. So you, you gave, or Rob gave those to you, correct, Adam? Yes. Yes. And how is that? Oh, boy, show and tell.

He kept it. I kept it. Is that one of the tarantulas that bit Adam? This is the one that bit me. Oh, no way. What a terrible pet. No, it's a fantastic thing. Is that all his, like, nest is webbing?

That's awesome. Is that his webbing in there that I see? Yes, yes. Wow, he's got a whole little house in there. Nice. He has up the whole thing, and I'm terrified of it, but I like it. So, Adam, how was taking that bite, knowing, you know, having that reaction going into it? How was it all?

I lost sleep knowing that that bite was coming up. Like, no joke. I would message Rob like almost daily talking about the OBT. How are we going to handle this thing? Because they are so fast, even just getting a hand on it to get the other person bitten is like I couldn't gauge how the hell we're going to do it because they are so quick. And I was,

he picks up this thing like a pro like boop like it was nothing. After all his fear, I was like, dang, it was like, Here you go. It was pretty good. I must say it was that moment. I mean, yeah, in the moment, what were you thinking? You were just like, like, it sounds like you were well prepared after all the anxiety to just dive in.

Pretty much, I, like I said, you know, I'm a wildlife biologist, but I am a mammal guy, mammals, primates. My, caveman's reptile guy. Right. These things, they're not. we're so out of that element Rob's probably got more experience than I do I know he does

handling spiders and stuff me no I don't hate spiders but I don't like them right so for me the first time I've ever handled a tarantula

was in season one with the one in Bolivia and then that was it and then jumping into the bloody orange baboon tarangela yeah I mean we did another new World Tarantula. We did the Brazilian Black and White tarantula.

And I mean, even that, New World Tarantulas Venom isn't that bad, but I had a bad reaction to it in Bolivia. So I didn't know how I was going to react to the Brazilian black and white, let alone the bloody OBT, which is so much damn worse. Yeah. Yeah, it was

just fucked. I mean, they kick hair, urticating hairs as well. Yeah. Which can really mess you up. Well, I think you guys are absolutely nuts. But let's, let's shift gears here. Wait, wait, wait. Hold on. Don't, don't shift gears yet. No, please. I definitely want to hear what, uh, what, uh, Adam picked for, for Rob. Oh, good point. Yeah, sorry, good point. So my

kryptonite is tarantulas and cavemen's is, uh, centipedes. Mm-hmm. Oh, yeah. What the giant Asian centipede ranked number two on the pain index for season one. Yeah. So I chucked on the giant desert centipede, Scolopendra Hiros, which is the most

venomous centipede in the United States. It's also, that was a good one. It's also incredibly, incredibly creepy looking like a legit monster out of a movie. So. Yeah. It's just all those legs.

Oh. And how how was taking that, Rob? It's like, like Adam, like he doesn't hate, I don't hate centipedes. I like when I see them in the wild. I just don't like them on me. And years ago, I caught a giant desert centipede in Arizona. And I was like, let's shoot a video of me letting it crawl up my arm. And when I do that, it's going to cure my phobia.

It did not. This thing went up my arm and where it walked, it irritated my skin just from walking. Oh, wow. So, like, that didn't help. But the worst, the thing comes up and then goes down my shirt. Oh. And the shirt came off and I went screaming and did not cure my phobia. Wow.

Yeah, normally people, they take it one step at a time, like a little non-dangerous centipede that you find in the house and then move up. You just threw this, like, deadly. Chet. So I'm going to shift gears here because, like, love, look, I can sit here and listen to you guys talk about all the different bites and stings you've taken literally all night, but I'm just going to tune into Kings of Pain season two. That seems like a much easier way to get all this information and laugh at you guys. May 26th. Yeah, May 26th, which is great. But my point here, you guys didn't just do this for fun, right? You guys know me well enough,

Adam and Rob, maybe Peter at this point too. You know that I hate fear mongering, right? Like I hate demonizing, villainizing creatures. It doesn't matter if they're icky scorpions or disgusting centipedes or whatever. You get my point. Let's talk about why this is significant, you know, for a minute. Let's shift gears here and talk about,

like, why is this something worth doing? You know, it's not just that you guys wanted to be subjected to terrible bullshit pain for months at a time. Like, let's talk about why this is actually interesting and what we're learning from it. Take it away. well I mean

people there's countless YouTube videos people get bitten and stung by animals and things like that but we wanted to make as detailed pain index as you can when it comes to being bitten and stung by animals

and that's the intensity of the pain so the acute pain of it basically as soon as it bites and stings then the duration so how long does that bite or sting or electrocution, punched, etc. last ball and then ultimately what damage you're left with.

And you know, we love animals 100%. That's we, that's our life is animals. So we don't want to make people scared of them, but ultimately when people see what these animals are capable of

there's that respect. You know, when you respect something you ultimately you know, if something can deal with that much pain to a human being. People want to learn about them. People respect them. They love them. They want to learn more than when you learn about something, you grow to love it. You know, me with tarantulas, I'm starting to like them now because I know what they can do. I've handled

them now and I want to learn more and I actually really like them. So it will help people because if they have been and stung by one of these animals, they know kind of what to expect because they'll see what Caveman and I rated it. Right. And panic in a situation like that is a big killer. If you panic, you do stupid things. You make mistakes and you can ultimately lose your life. So if that can cause people to panic a little bit less, then, you know, it could save life. And also the Adam is, right?

Rob, how do you see this sort of promoting conservation? Do you know what I mean? Yeah. How do you see this helping conservation? Adam and I were super concerned that this is going to demonize animals. This is going to take something that people are already scared about and push them over the edge. This is on another network I'm going to talk about it. My favorite show ever, besides Extincter Live.

I was going to say, Extincter Live, of course, or mysterious creatures. Now, please continue. I once told Forrest that he will never have a show as good as Extincter Live. And he's right, by the way. That show was freaking awesome. Yeah, please continue. Another big favorite of mine is River Monsters with Jeremy. I'll be back in two seconds. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So if you watch River Monsters and just listen to what he's saying, like they probably put him in this position, but like, now I'm going to go

on this river, and this thing could happen to me, and that lightning could strike me, and I could fall in the water and drown, and then the fish could eat me, and it seems like so much fear-mongering. But when you take the show as a whole, people have really responded to that show and become very interested in freshwater fish conservation and mega fish projects and things like that. I think what that is is instead of trying to downplay in animals danger, it's putting it all in your face and then you realize, you know what, it's probably going to be okay. And not only that, but these animals are freaking cool.

and you look forward to see him on TV. You want to see that giant catfish that may be scavenged on dead bodies in India, but you're like, that's a freaking cool catfish, you know? I think Kings of Pain is done the same thing. It puts it out there for someone that kind of hooks someone in, kind of tricks someone to watch, and then they get some exposure.

And there's always something in our show that's an interesting fact that people sort of get triggered by in a way to like, I want to learn more. I want to know. Yeah. And a big one for us this season that we almost didn't do was sharks. The sharks are probably demonized more. So you did do sharks this season?

We did do sharks this season. And after a lot of debate, a lot of debate, as to whether, is this going to make things worse for sharks or not? But we didn't do a shark bite. Everyone knows those sharks can bite. We don't need to do that. We did stinging sharks. Oh, interesting. Four sharks.

We did the California horn shark, and we did the, uh, uh, poor Jackson shark from Australia. Yep. And we figured that it's an interesting thing that most people don't know about sharks, rumored to be venomous, not sure or not. They sting. That's how they can defend themselves. They're so cute.

No one's going to look at that, be scared. And you see a couple of grown men, they're scared to death about these cute little animals. And then the sting wasn't, you know, didn't kill us. We thought it would actually be a very different take on, how interesting sharks are that some can actually sting to defend themselves. Yeah, that's cool. Yeah. That's a great answer, Rob, because you know, right, like, there are going to be those people

that are like, fuck these guys. Like, I can't believe they're doing this. I can't believe they're showing this. They're making us scared of animals. I get it, right? Like, I get fucking hate. And look at what I do. All I do is preach conservation and I somehow still get hate.

Like, everybody gets it. If you're in the public light, you get it. So it's nice to hear from you guys. And by the way, I agree. I want to be very transparent about that. I agree with what you're saying. If you put it all on the line and you don't, there's a big, you don't have to go, oh, it's scary, stay away, it's deadly. And you don't have to go, oh, it's your buddy, because it's fucking not, you know.

But if you go, here's what it is, it sucks. But here's a fact about it. Here's where they're found. Here's how to avoid them. If you see one, just leave it the fuck alone. And if you don't, this is what happens. People go, oh, yeah, that makes sense. You know, like you kind of look at it and go, yeah, that.

that really adds up. Like you don't, you know, the next time I see a desert hairy scorpion, maybe I won't try and pick it up by the tail for amusement. You know, maybe now that I've seen this, I'll go, that looks like it sucks. I'm glad I saw it, but I'm going to stay six feet away from it. Right. And then also, also that prevents more bites from happening and animals from getting a worse reputation.

You know, you hear this animal kills 50 humans a year in the U.S. or something. And like you're more likely to try and either if you can't run away from the animal, you kill it instead of potentially not panicking and be like, okay, I know to slowly step away and it's not going to bug me, go around it type thing, you know? So, so. So, Peter, let's make fun of Justin and just tell the whole story. It's so funny. So you guys know Justin Christensen, right?

Have you met him? I think he's in post on your show. Has he been in the field with you guys? I don't think so You'd know him He's about nine feet tall And sounds like Eeyore from Winnie to Poo You're such a terrible

I am I am But I love Justin I worked with Justin a lot And he's a super smart guy And so the last time We're just gonna We're gonna lay it all on the line here That's why people like listening to the show

So the last time you guys were on the show Right you came on I think I texted you I was like hey guys you want to come on the show You couldn't talk a lot about Kings of Pain because you were filming season two. And I didn't even know that at the time. I just wanted you guys to come talk about what you had done. And you come on the show and TV's a small world, right?

It's a tiny little world. And you guys come on the show and we had fun. The show comes out two weeks later. Well, like three days after the show comes out, I get a text message from Justin that's like, fuck you, dude, dot, dot, dot. And I'm like, huh? Question mark.

And he's like, do you know how much work you just created for me? and I'm literally like drawing a complete blank and I'm like, what are you talking about? And so what happened was the show came out, some of the executives at History Channel listened to it. They liked some of our nonsense and our jibber jabber and our ideas told David Carr, hey, David, you got to start thinking about this, this and this, who then went to Justin and said, hey, Justin, I need you to do this laundry list of work. I had no idea about this. Oh, you didn't do it.

he was, oh, well, you were busy getting married when we were discussing it. But we're at your wedding. And Justin's like, dude, he's talking to me and Patrick. He's like, fuck you guys, man. Fuck you guys. Like, you don't know how much work you created for me. Like, I was, I was chilling. Life was easy.

The show was cruising. Then you guys did the show and this trickle down effect. So, all that being said, do either of you remember or you, Peter, because you're important too. You're special. Thanks. Do you remember the one thing I said, I was like, how cool would it? be if you created blank that I would love to put in my office if you guys did of the show.

Do you remember what it was? Yeah. Yeah. It was of the paint index, right? You want to post it. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, Justin.

I haven't seen it. It's not open. This is going to be a live unboxing like a nine-year-old on YouTube. Have you seen it? Have you guys seen it, Adam and Rob? We've seen the painting. I haven't seen a poster of it. Well, I got one.

And it's going up in my one. The poster. I've got it right here. So Justin text me and he's like, hey, I heard you're having Adam and Rob on the show again. And I'm like, yeah, hope it makes more work for you. Ha, ha, ha. You know, like, fucking around. He's like, no, but all seriousness, can I overnight you the poster?

And I'm like, no way, you made the poster. And so he sent this to me yesterday. And I haven't opened it yet. I'm just literally pulling the sticky table up right now. So should we do it? Should we check it out? All right, here we go. All right.

Here we go. It's like seriously wrapped up. I haven't even got to it yet. Hold on. I probably should have like cut the tape or something before all that hype. Wait, so you guys haven't seen this either? What if he's going to? Oh, God.

Justin would do that, to be honest. I actually didn't even think of that. Let me. It's very well packaged. So you guys haven't seen this yet, Robin Adam? Or you have? No? No.

This is, this is fucking exclusive groundbreaking right now. Groundbreaking. We are going to unveil the Kings of Pain, Pain Index poster. Here it comes, ladies and gentlemen. Peter, can I get a drum roll or something fun? Do you have something lined up? That's it. Boy, we are a high-production quality show.

Here it comes. All right, let's see. I'm going to see it on the computer for the first time. I hope it's the right side up. Look at that. Kings of Pain, the Pain Index poster. That looks really nice. Too much reflection going on.

It's mirrored the wrong way, but it still looks very cool. That makes sense. Well, this is bad. Look at that. It's got the History Channel logo in the bottom corner there. It's got season one in white, season two, and yellow. Got all the animals ranked from zero to 30. It's literally everything we discussed, and it's absolutely bad ass.

I am framing this and putting it up on my wall in the office. I'm going to text Justin now and tell him, make sure that it. Adam and Rob never get copies. Only Peter. That's sick, man. I want one of them. I can't believe we did that many animals. It is a lot of animals. That's a lot of fuckers. There's some things in here that I didn't realize. Like, oh, my God, I can't believe you took a scorpion fish.

I'm terrified of scorpion fish. Oh, yeah. You guys are nuts. I need you guys to sign this for me. So the next time, Adam, you're state side. And Rob, I see you relatively frequently. I'm going to have to get a little signature. on here. Sure, man.

Yeah. That's huge. That's awesome. Congratulations, guys. Last time I was, uh, we caught up with you was in that, in that cool, cool bar. The nugget. Man, I had like nine pints in an hour. Yeah.

I, I, I was confident that you were an alcoholic at that point. I mean, you, you would have to be to do this job. Then look, we got wrong to pull in and I grabbed a six pack on the way, huh? We just drink. I didn't drink in the car. Excellent. Well, I'm stoked for you guys. Congratulations.

We're going to play a game. We're going to play our famous game in a minute. But before we do, for the Browsners that have been paying attention all along, when's the show air, where does it air? Tell us a little bit where. Tell us some of that good stuff before we get into our game. So it's going to be May 26th, I think at 1030 Eastern Pacific, right after the season nine premiere of a lone.

Okay. You guys are put survival stuff, watch that. And then we'll be right on after that. That's exciting. On history. On history channel. See, the thing is, I won't even be able to get to watch it because it doesn't air for a few months later in Australia. Oh, they'll send it to you.

Come on. Come on, David Carr. Justin Christensen, you're listening to this. Send Adam the goddamn show. It's a matter with you guys. We'll just pirate it for you. They're just pirated. Whatever they have.

Yeah, we'll rip it off. Peter knows how to do all those things. We'll put it off. on YouTube. Stay tuned here. The whole show is coming out for free. No, I'm kidding. All right. So, can I get the jingle this time, Peter? Or are you going to do some stupid do you know what time is? Shut your big mouth. For what?

Battle Royale. So Adam and Rob, you know how the game works. You played it before. We are going to do the Battle Royale. Now, the last time we were here, we made our battle royale about basically stinging each other's taints, if I remember. remember correctly, thanks to Peter's good ideas. So we're going to mix it up. Okay, this time, we are going to give ourselves superpowers that you guys have faced, okay? And then we're going to all compete in combat.

So Peter's going to give himself three powers. Adam's going to give himself three powers and Caveman Robb's going to give himself three powers. Can you put the poster up, please, so that we can have that as reference. I know you need this. And then we are going to all battle in a state. and the one standing victorious as dictated by the Browsoners votes, we will let you know.

And we have Dave Sunshine, our resident graphic artist, who will probably draw this up. Good luck with this, Dave. It's going to be a nightmare. Here's the kick. Here's the kicker. We're going to snake draft. Peter's going to start, sucker.

And it's got to be one sting, one bite, and one strike special power. you know, think of electrocution, punch, slash, whatever. And you're going to give yourselves these superpowers. We're all going to have a traditional battle in a stadium. Peter, take it away. All right. So it has nothing, just to be clear, nothing to do with body size or anything like that. This is pure.

We're going bite, sting. You are taking on these abilities. So if you say, hey, I'm taking on the ability. Sorry, I was Googling furiously. Of course you were. Yeah, you need to know. Googling what is animal. All right.

So I am going to, I mean, obviously take the moray that both of these gentlemen were so afraid of as my bite. It has the mouth of a paper shredder slash wood chipper. It is terrifying to look at. And I would love for my head and face to look just like the mouth of moray eel. Love it. Yeah, I like how you say more a as well, moray. It's sorry. Adam, why don't you go next

because you're next in my screen squares? Well, I've got to go with the only animal that completely shattered the reticulated python on the pain index and that's the beaded lizard. Oh, wow. Yeah.

Wow. Okay. Bad, bad bite. Got to go with that. Very venomous lizard. That sounds awful. I've looked for Mexican beatids, never found them. I've found, what do you call them? What are the Arizona ones, Rob?

Heal monsters and been very scared to take a bite from them, obviously not trying to. That's the hell of the call. All right, Rob, what do you got? All right, I fell asleep for a second. We were doing bites first, right? Doesn't matter. Any order you like. Sting, bite, strike, and once you pick it, you take it off the table.

Oh, okay. Well, then I've got to take the, the election. electric eel. I have a forceful around me. Oh, that's smart. That is, that is a good one. It's going stride into the special ability. Are you taking the electric abilities of an eel?

Very nice. I like that. Okay, I'm up for two as it's a snake draft. So I'm going to go first. Hmm. I'm going to go with this, I'm going to go with the special ability first. Okay. I think I've picked this multiple times on multiple different podcasts, but I don't care.

Bombadier beetle. I'm going to shoot, you know, after Adams, or sorry, after Rob's poop story, I'm going to be the guy that's just poop and diarrhea acid all over you guys in the stadium. So I'm going to take acid shooting of a bombardier beetle as my special strike. Good choice. I have to write it down or I'll forget. And then I am going to take the sting.

Hmm. Yes, I'm going to take the sting of a scorpion fish. So I'm going to have big spine rays that stick out side of my neck, out my back, stone scorpion fish. You know, if you come at me, I curl into a ball. Good luck getting through those spines. It's not going to be nice. Okay. Nice.

That's a formidable defense you got there. It's shaping up. Where, Rob, you're next. All right. So it has to be a sting, right? You got one, you got your special, so you got a bite and a sting. but you pick whichever one you want. Yeah, I got you.

Well, I'm going to go for the bite, and I'm going to do the reticulated Python because that they can reach out at the distance as well. Wow. You can squeeze. Okay. How's that going to face off when you and Peter with his Moree eel head just start trying to bite each other?

How's that good shake out? You should get that close because I'm going to electrocute them. Smart. I'm doing all long-distance attacks. Smart. Yeah, you're going to go unscathed if you keep this up. Adam, what do you got? Nice.

So for special ability, don't have to go mantis shrimp. Wow. You did I see a mantis shrimp in the trailer? Yeah. Oh my God. You got that fucking insane. I mean, they are,

they punch that fast. It is mind-blank. I mean, they bloody, they create light. Yeah. Because they punch so quick. Sound barrier. You can keep in mind, these things are all scaled up to our body sizes for this, for this combat. I don't like it.

Well, if a human, if a Manton Street was the size of a human, it would be able to punch a basketball into orbit. Okay. So we just lost. Unless Rob can electrocute him from across the – this is – Peter, we suck at this, but they've also experienced it. Well, I've always sucked at this game. It's true. All right, Peter, you're up for dose. Let's go.

Okay. Well, let me pull up my Google real quick. again. So embarrassing. So I'm going with, I need what, a bite and a special ability or a sting in a special ability, right?

Correct. Okay. For the special ability, I will take a, I will take on the malaria infected mosquito ability.

Therefore, it doesn't really matter what happens to my animal at the end of the day you will all die due to the blood spatter everywhere. Yeah. So just the ability to give somebody malaria. Correct.

That's your special ability. But hey, that's two and one man. Like, it's either the mosquito or the area disease. Like, that's a two-fo. Hey, how about this? So I'll take the special ability of malaria. But the sting, I still, my sting left of the mosquito. The malaria-infected mosquito.

You're forgiven for being a dumb-dum, so you get to pick a different sting. Okay. A different sting? Well, I mean, I'm obviously going to go with, does this giant desert centipede? Does it sting or bite? It's a pinch.

Because it's not their jaws, they're like modified legs technically, but you can say bite, but actually, yeah, I mean, well, you know, we'll put it on your backside and call it a sting, Peter. We'll give you a sentiment.

Thank you. Or else the show will never end. Exactly. Very good, Peter. Good, good, good effort. Thank you. Adam, how are you going to round out your beaded lizard-headed mantis shrimp

punching creature? Okay, so sting-wise, got to go to Irokanji. Wow. Okay, just a deadly jellyfish. All right, I like it. Yeah, multiple tangicles. That's pretty awful.

So I was just in PNG, by the way. I was just in Papua New Guinea. And at night, in one of the bays that we spent, we anchored the boat, hundreds of them around the boat. And I was five seconds away from jumping in the ocean. And my editor buddy comes out, who's with us and looks down and goes, Forest, check out this jellyfish.

And I'm like, nope, not jumping in the water now. Yeah. Yeah. Good idea. You have the force field of an electric eel, the bite of a retic, and... Well, Adam took my box jellies too close, but I am going to go with Portuguese man-of-war. Long tentacles, another distance thing. You're not getting out of the sunsgates unless Adam can somehow get a punch in.

Well, he's definitely going to get malaria, so... That's true. That's true. We all lose eventually because we are all contracting malaria, even though Peter will undeniably die. My sclerc. My super power is sickle cell. He'll die in 50 years.

So let's see. So I have the very menacing Bombadier Beetles acid coming out of my backside. I've got the sting of a scorpion fish, big spines all over, very impenetrable. What do I need? I need a bite. I'm going to give myself the bite. Now, now keep in mind. mind we're not going like typan because you just

die. That's not how the game works. I'm going to give myself the bite of a Komoto dragon. Terrible. It's terrible. It's awful, but you're not dying on impact. It's a slow, disgusting you guys didn't fuck with that, did you? That would be insanity?

Would you? Would you? A little one? You know, when they're small, memorial ones, would you do it? Yeah. Yeah. A little one. This is what the diary cam footage is like, isn't it? You guys are nuts.

All right, Browsoners, weigh in. Let us know who wins once you get us into an arena. Is it Peter with his moray eel bite, his centipede sting, even though they don't sting, and malaria. No explanation. Just malaria.

Malaria. Is it Adams? To me, this one is very menacing. The bite of a beaded lizard, the punch of a mantis shrimp, and the sting and regenerative abilities of a irokanji jellyfish awful all around rob whose best offense is a very strong defense here electric eel bite of a reticulated python and the long stinging tentacles of a portuguese man of war or is it me with diarrhea acid from a bombardier beetle the sting of a scorpion fish and the bite of a

comodo dragon uh dave sunshine good luck drawing these what a mess like this is quite something very curious to hear who wins tonight's Battle Royale. Oh, yeah. Let us know in the comments. Your Instagram handles are on the screen for those watching on YouTube. Tell us the people where they can find you and where they can tune in and watch this insane show. Well, you can find us.

I think both of us basically mainly use for Instagram. What we mainly use. And yeah, it's Kings of Pain season two is airing. Thursday, 26th of May, you've got to watch it. Like, the animals are going to blow your mind. If you think season one was bad, fucking season two was shocking.

I see the pain on his face. Yeah. We will put a little bit of behind-the-scenes stuff up on our Instagrams as those episodes unfold. Adam is Adam underscore Thorn and I am caveman Rob. And anyone wants to know

lab called Caveman. It's my mental abilities. Kings of Pain, Season 2, coming out to the History Channel. I'm excited. You can watch it on history. It's going to be all over the internet. You can check out these guys' Instagram. And, of course, you can listen in right here to the Wild Times podcast where we get some in-depth behind the scenes. We're obviously going to have Rob and Adam back on the show, probably around season 12 when they're completely crippled and decrepid. But guys, thank you very much for joining us. Peter, thank you.

Let's do the thing. Thanks for having us. Thanks, guys. Always a pleasure. And as always, check out the Wild Times Podcast.com to find all the links to this and all of our other content. Patreon is patreon.com forward slash wild times pod at Wild Timespod on all social medias. And don't forget to check out Kings of Payne, May 26th, Thursday, 10 p.m. Eastern on History Channel. Love you all.

Get a poster. Get a poster. Go and do it. Go get a Kings of Pain poster. Put on your wall. Do it. Would you, would you, Peter, would you let any of these animals sting you? Only you, baby. Hmm, that's nice. I'm going to, I want to borrow that spider from Rob and put it in your bed. That's great. I love that. And that thing. I'll do it. I don't care.