Will & Rusty's Playdate - bush on main

Episode Date: October 22, 2025

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Bring it with SAP Grow. AI Cloud ERP for any size business. i think we're supposed to be hang drying some stuff and we just don't i'm a guy i'm a fucking guy i'm not gonna hang dry i'm a guy i'm gonna play hang man not hang dry i'm guy all i do is play hang man are we going and we are going all right play date what episode is it andrew 151 oh i got one for next episode teddy bruski no he's 54 can we do it later in the episode i don't want to scare her one wait i gotta say something please it's good to be back it is great to be back yeah i really was uh yeah just sitting down here this feels like the longest i've gone i mean

it is i think the long since we started this show you've never been away that long longest i've gone without sitting here i think you were travel maxing i was travel maxing and it feels good to be back take us through the runner show what'd you do i hit ann arbor michigan for the mug root beer tour w minneapolis minnesota ramavar marathon chicago visited family we did that viral pod episode from there um new york city i went into a wedding epic cut cut a rug people were saying do you hear your move no i didn't hit my move it was like it was like the it was wait that's the super bowl for that move no but it was like house music you have to do way faster yeah like i couldn't well like the wedding was house music no the wedding wasn't but like the wedding

dance part it felt like wasn't that long and then it got and then it was like the after party and then gotcha like it wasn't like like i feel like sometimes maybe you just stay at the venue really late yeah like the after party this was like party kind of all right now it's with our families and stuff and then we they ran it out like a bar and then it was like a dj that's a good move it was great yeah anyway this episode is brought to you by cash app cash app write me a trick cash it i went nuts i like was like and then um i went to um orlando we drank around the world at mcot and then i went to they said it couldn't be done three times they said no one's ever done it three times we walked in there i would be shocked if someone has done it if more than like a hand i

bet we're positive that there are probably upwards of 10 000 people who have done it three times no actually i'm gonna say maybe close to a million who has the money for that no because we're in i refuse we are in an elite group now no dude three total how many do you Okay, literally, like, do you know how many people just, like, live there and go every day? Yeah, but there's no way they're drinking around the world every day. Oh, oh, oh, you're saying drinking around the world. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think you're saying going to Epcot three times.

I bet we're in, I bet we're, yeah, I bet there are people that have, there are millions of people that have gone. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, okay. I bet we are in a select, I bet there are more people that belong to Augusta National than have drank around the world three times. That is not what I thought you were going to say. We're in a morgue. I really don't have any frame of reference for that. they like give you a jacket yeah when you walk into epcot i bet there are more people in the

skull and bones society than what are these reference i'm trying to think of like what the hell is a skull and bone society they were a group at yale or they are a group at yale and a lot of a lot of presidents have been both the bushes were skull and bones guys a lot of supreme court justices i think it's like one of those fucking you don't know like secret societies is that the one that mark zuckerberg is trying to get into and that was at harvard that was the phoenix skull and bones is at is at yale but they're like equivalent it's like how hello shovelhead is at no the skit the skull and bones is like a proper like they don't admit that it exists i believe okay final clubs or finals clubs whatever it is

at harvard are like pub they're almost like a fraternity okay you ever seen gossip girl no chuck bass tries to join skull and bone society when he visits yale if that tells you anything does he get in is that doing anything who the hell is chuck he does not get in spoiler they want him in whoa dude i haven't seen gossip girl i you would like gossip girl i'm shocked you haven't seen it i'll watch gossip all right tonight i'll watch it oh you know what i watched that's great the chair company the newton robinson show on hbo i didn't even know he had a new show until i saw a billboard the other day i mean that feels like a logical dude i didn't even i didn't even know he had one until i heard about it

through the market yeah like it just came out this week so that feels like it checks out i felt like a fucking idiot there i was driving on the 405 not knowing about tim robinson's new show next thing bam i see a billboard i know about it a day later than everyone else well I was going to say, usually I feel like when Tim Robinson does anything, everybody talks about it for like three months before it actually comes out. Like the Friendship movie. True. I heard so much about that.

Is that good? I will say, I didn't know about this for months. You did? So you might have just been a little out of the loop. Did you see a billboard? No, no. I think I saw a reel. I'm actually really, I'm really into like reels.

I think I've talked about this. Like Instagram reels, you can just scroll forever and then you don't have to do anything else with your life. So much good shit on there. it is insane i was thinking about it yesterday i was like i had like a pretty busy day yesterday and so then every moment of downtime is just like reels i uh i had a moment this morning that kind of scared me yeah with reels i if you know anything about me you know i'm easily fooled and i do very little follow-up research so if i if i'm just gonna take your word for it sure if

you tell me if i learn something on the internet i'm there's a small chance i'm gonna google it i'm probably gonna spread it spread it very quickly yeah i saw a video this morning probably the first thing i saw when i woke up this guy pours he's a cup and he pours the water into a fish tank and like a tiny little otter the size of like a thumb comes out and i was like oh my god this is crazy i didn't know that that like existed and then i went to go about my day and then i was like what would will and andrew tell me to do investigate a little bit further so i scrolled back up and i opened all the comments and they were like the the hand has six fingers this is ai and i went back and i counted it was ai i would have i need to be you thought otters could be the

size of a finger i thought it was like a new thing i don't know but i'm gonna be this is the rusty guarantee i'm gonna start being more diligent because this is gonna get it's true with a lot of the way the world is moving is really bad for guys like you i just the problem is no matter how much work you put in now to fix it when you're gonna be the funniest old guy of all time when you start to lose your mind you're yeah you're gonna fall for everything the the like the ai jesus things that are the ai like military like no one wished me a happy birthday thing oh yeah those they're whatever the evolution of that is in 50 years will be right up my yes oh my god your facebook wall is gonna be somehow it's still facebook for old people you just like graduate to

it yo is is yeah yeah like around like 60 it's like yeah everyone's starting to move over to facebook is instagram gonna be like for unks in 20 years like will there be like i'm gonna be on gorbo gorbo gorbo do you guys want to do wouldn't be fun to like invent something and then just sell it and then never have to work i know i've been trying every day in my mind for you i have this i have this vision of myself and i don't know how it's gonna happen yes i actually am naked so you know we you know we got sora we make the first thing i took a lot of heat for that though i'm out on i'm i'm no longer uh gonna post ai on my social really i know what do people say i got so many dms being like i thought better of you well i didn't know how bad it was so i was just

having fun and then once i learned how bad it was i stopped well i don't understand whether people were more upset and maybe it's a combination of the two is it the the just like moral like thing or is it like how much water and energy i think there are two there are two different groups yeah and one care some people care about both but i think probably you were getting hit from both listen i'm gonna be honest i i saw a video and i said that's the funniest thing ever i have to make it and i didn't think about any repercussions so hand up cancel me you want to know honestly cancel me i'm a bad boy podcasting i don't give a fuck i posted two ai videos on my story take me down i think as long as you're just using ai for porn it's fine right but everything that's

what i thought but the the one that i posted didn't show hog so i think it then just became a recreational thing i think that's why everyone was that's how they get you yeah yeah they kind of get they get your foot in the door right by showing up by letting you make sexy boys but then next next thing you know you don't know the first video i created all right it was like what it was something like a nine-year-old it was me counting a billion dollars i saw that it was me going a billion one a billion two a billion three all right ladies let's jump in the pool and then we all jump off my balcony and fall like 50 feet well i'll never make another ai video but i'm glad i have that you know i'm glad i made two yeah i think everyone

gets two what if we did a yeah yeah what was your prompt for the second one where you're getting kidnapped oh it was like uh i'm i'm being held hostage by the mob and i keep telling them i'm gonna figure out rice pilaf three i just rice pilaf three i just need a little bit more time it was insane how they just like yeah i didn't give them any context for like the setting or anything but it was like perfect yeah they have your it did scare me a little bit because they had my cadence the way i speak yeah oh i record you speaking i made no i know but i only read like three numbers yeah uh i actually you know what i lied i think i lied actually and i made a third one that i wasn't gonna for some reason two was better i did a i made it make me do a

beer review of a beer called poopy and poop shoots out of that can and covers me at poop you know what i actually think i did that on second on second yeah you know what on second thought i do think i made a third one i actually think i might have made a third one now that wait i feel like you might have made a third one though you know what now yep now that you ask wait do this is do guy guy gets called into the principal's office and clearly pooped in the urinal you know what actually yeah i now that i'm seeing the security footage i could see how it would look like that's what i do and i have my dna on it right yeah you can't test for that okay but the video is it's me and my butt uh-huh there is a i knew a kid yeah you know what i think about

it i actually think i shit it all over that oh you know what did that happen poop in your urinal you know many times nice there was a kid i have a video of it and uh what of the kid doing a video of a high schooler pooping in a urinal you want to see it no he was older than me when i took it he was a senior i still think it's a crime if i watch it uh he was a senior and i was a sophomore you can watch it but you have to be like picturing you have to be like thinking about when you were in high school right so what's up with the sunglasses um shades maxing where'd you get them uh i got them at a little vendor down on the boardwalk a lit really little vendor can we tell andrew the true the real story he bought them for 200 at epcot oh my god on the

company car no that's not what happened that's not what and then felt so bad about it the next day that he said i don't want them get them out of my sight and i and gave him no that's not what i said i said if i give them to will then it's not like i then it is like for it was part of the video it was not part of the video it's also like like yeah i was i'd had 13 drinks that's your That's your argument. Lucas should have been like, no, we can't have those. Yeah. Epcot got – this was the most dangerous one yet because there were extra countries.

Should we talk about it? Yeah. Yeah, they dropped new countries. They had Brazil, Belgium, Spain. So I asked Lucas about it. He said, I've never seen Rusty that drunk before in my life. Yeah, he had 15 drinks. I don't know how he does it because he can keep like a –

I don't know either, honestly. I can do that with beers. with liquor i can't i just like go nuts is he mad at me no no he wasn't mad but he was just saying like he thinks because you were doing sober october and you have been like sober for the first two weeks leading up that that like made you more susceptible the last couple countries i was like all right let me go order the drinks like i was like scared they were gonna like cut him off or kick him out i worry about that too yeah so in my video we made it i go all right bonus continent we have africa and one of the top comments is like africa is not a country

wait bonus con and i was like i know or i didn't respond because i didn't want to like fuel the fire but i was like you just watched me say bonus continent oh and so people are trying to they're trying to do like a gotcha moment like this stupid guy doesn't know what africa is i can name every country in africa chat andrew pull up a map of africa let's do it wait can i do this really quickly you could name every i could over last christmas you want me to do a blank map no go to like satara.com ready okay this is africa country this is africa countries oh man no i'm joking uh it is the can i point to them is that yeah why don't we switch you want to sit down this is Eritrea

he has no idea where Eritrea is I saw it in his eyes I will say also great shirt Andrew you guys should get I don't even know if we get money when the merch gets sold but these are so funny that I think you should buy them we do we get the merch bonus

that's how I was able to go to Disneyland this weekend did you get it paid? no but you know I'm counting my change before the hatch that's so funny yesterday Jack calls me into the office he's like did you see andrew's thing about like thanks for the playmates for like helping to send me to disneyland i was like yeah it's like did he like ask them to like memo him or something it sounded like you like crowdsourced the no wait hey pick eritrea he has no idea where eritrea is

yeah no i actually do i just i wish it started can i start with an easier one no no i just skipped it i'll come back to it you just said i actually do and then i'll come back to it you don't know where it is i mean this doesn't count all right i'm one for one no you are you're he's gonna wait for it to be the last one yeah he's like i act oh i said he doesn't know where it is he's like i actually do wait okay let me let me warm up with europe let me warm up with you what let me warm up with you oh my god let me warm up with you like rusty's video game hour yeah you made a claim i think you can do europe we're gonna have to cut all of this bro i mean what is this you just didn't even you got one country i need to warm up that doesn't make

any sense they're separate i think you already missed one he's at 80 percent did he already miss one no why are you at 83 percent then oh man he doesn't even know i know where slovenia is that's hungry no he got that wrong yeah everyone just calmed everyone just calmed down I'm panicking. Oh, my God. So, Slovakia. So, Austria. It's Hungary.

Slovenia. That's Slovakia. It's down here. I can't see where you're pointing. Go to the left. Go to the left. That one. See, I just...

It's one of these. I mean, this isn't... No, it isn't. Andorra is over here. It's between Spain and France. Fuck! It's the little tiny one in between Spain and France.

impressed oh i didn't knock my drink no i okay you know what catch me after christmas break that's when that's the last time i knew every country i'm a little rusty i'm a little rusty you're a little rusty you're a little dude i cannot wait to have a little rusty running around i can't wait to have a little rusty in me you i spilled my drink that is so embarrassing because this whole time i thought i retained that knowledge like i would have i would have bet my life on it that like well thank god you weren't in a situation where you had to bet your life oh my god i only knew nigeria the best is i go you don't know where eritrea is you yeah i do all right i'm gonna skip that one i i will say there there africa has the most countries i think it

is 54 so wouldn't like asia have um no i guess maybe not africa has the most what about north america they have 50 that's just america has 50 countries not north america oh north america only is canada and mexico oh okay sometimes i can't with it yeah so epcot we did it the i people were all like every time we went our way they were like you got to start in mexico like it's a crime to not start in mexico yep and then when we did it this way and we started in mexico one it stunk it was not as fun well it's just like you don't want to end in canada yeah but two i got all these comments being like no obviously you start in canada it's like where were you the first time yeah i mean i didn't have my backup class last year case of nobody can win if everyone wins

right why do you have to start in mexico what's so great about mexico i don't know it's just like the other i don't know i mean it's fun yeah i actually kind of don't like mexico because it's like indoors i think it's overripe yeah i think mexico might be overrate overrated um here's a question please do you think there will be i was talking about this with billy langdon yesterday love that guy you think there'll be some sort of like uh darwinian if you will consequence of how much like when i poop right now i spend so much longer pooping probably than people did in the past because i'm just like on my phone right and it's just kind of like no rush like sometimes i'll be done and i just like i'll throw in a few reels just before the wipe right let it dry let

the poop whatever you gotta yeah we were talking about like do you think like it'll evolve like people get so comfortable on the toilet that like our ancestors like in a thousand years will like pooping will be half their day you just like gets out of control i wasn't gonna say you don't have to wipe anymore but half your day oh we just get so good at it yeah go good at pooping that we don't have to wipe anymore yeah here's my prediction how good would you have to get a pooping and oh my imagine like a guy who's cracked at pooping pun intended nice i think i think we will evolve like our poop will start to become whoa what that would be disgusting our poop will will come out really slowly and in one uniform thing to adjust for how long we're

sitting there so it'll be like you know a 45 inch connected log instead of droplets interesting what's the longest poop you've ever taken 100 inches you ever have you ever have one that like uh it like goes down the drain like so you can see like half of it's under the thing so it's like as far as i know that could be like yeah yeah you would never know it's sort of like we had one that at school that was like we had one i'm not kidding how many people were involved in the creation of this thing one person It was one solid one, but I'm not exaggerating. It was the size of a baseball bat.

Like, it was huge. You have to be exaggerating. There's no way. I'm not. I'm not. Did the guy leave it there to be like, look what I've done for you? We don't know who it was. I mean, there's no way it was the size of a baseball bat.

I'm not kidding. Wait, pull up the- Did you play baseball? Huh? Have you seen a baseball? Yeah, I play baseball. Why did you come last night? I was taking my girl home from the airport.

Andrew, making out? Yeah. Pull up the poop. You're like giant bedpan poop and tell me if it's bigger or smaller. Dude, it's bigger. I don't believe you. Pull it up. I need to get my eyes on this thing again.

I actually don't want to do this. All right. Can you just all look at it for one second and then get rid of it? There's no way it was bigger than this. It was bigger. I swear. That was the length of this chair. You were telling me that someone's poop was this.

Was it like pencil thin? No, it was like the shape of a baseball. It had like a handle. That's thick. like a grip um but it was like worn down where they where the barrel was no it has pine tar a few hits yeah wait talk me through how you found this poop it was i didn't find it somebody else found it but they came back to history class and they were like you guys have to see this so this is in high school this is in high school so one by one we were asking the teacher if we could

go to the bathroom and we would all look at it and it was like one of those things where you're like can't be that big and then somebody comes back like eyes wide open like like they had just seen god and so the next person would be like okay i gotta see it and then they would go and you'd be like okay they're gonna be like reasonable they come back eyes wide open saw god you can you imagine like like a guy in the back of the room like sitting there real smug like like he's like yeah another person comes back like mesmerized by his his demon his log it sat there all day and even the girls wanted to go see it they're like take a picture take a picture we're like no was there toilet paper there nope no toilet paper i like i i like how he finished it and he's like

i can't cover this up so he just went to another stall to wipe he's like i'm leaving this here i have a theory i have a theory have you ever done the fake like toilet paper roll poop prank on your family this was real what's that like where you do like the toilet smoking you could get no no no it's better you're gonna like this you could take the cardboard middle part or if you're lucky there is maybe an empty uh paper towel roll and you get it super wet like the roll and then you tear it into shreds and you can form it into it looks exactly like a poop and then you'd like drop it on the toilet i think that you guys fell victim no i swear this is real you could smell it it was it was gross it felt like poop it tasted like poop it had a little

corn in it you know what they say if it feels it feels tastes and smells like poop it's probably poop probably poop here's a question yeah uh fuck i thought i need something the worst the worst part i have to get us off this at the end this is the last part i'll say about it at the end of the day i remember leaving school and seeing a janitor like walking putting on like big plastic gloves and just feeling he's wearing the like bomb diffuser thing exactly tell my wife i love her andrew when i was in college we would pull pranks on each other in the dorm bath if you knew your was pooping it was like he's a sitting duck and my buddy jack party was an epic name awesome name probably like the man last name was party best best name to be it was p-a-r-d-e party properties

kind of probably what is that it's like a thing on on abby kinney um okay but he that actually that's probably the best name to like go to college with jack party that sounds like a fake dude you are gonna love my buddy tim throw down jack party it's like kickback let's hit well yeah let's hit tommy kickbacks before we go to jack party so we can like warm up but he was i thought he was pooping michael pregame steve post game it's like a friday beaters character yeah dude jack party is gonna be there tommy heaters john fringe jesse smokes what was her what was her name jesse heaters jesse jesse heaters yeah so i thought um i got one wait i want to tell you oh oh oh oh i thought

you made you had another story no no no i was gonna um like francisco shots i i went to like um wait i'm about to do another one give me one second um michael beer bong no No, that doesn't work. Seamus Cocktail. Eric Motorboat. Yeah, that won't apply. All right, you're in. You got to meet...

Dude, you got to meet my buddy Tommy Grinding at the bar. Hmm. there's really sometimes there'll be like a christiano ketamine there's like a new skill that comes up that you're like really good at immediately and i like can't figure it out for a couple days yeah michael michael shotgun it's all michael um okay what were you gonna say rob jaeger bomb okay so i thought my friend jack party was pooping and because i saw his feet under the stall and we would sometimes we would like wet paper towels and then like stand in the other stall

and like throw them like up into his stall and they would like land he's like couldn't do anything about it harmless prank i really wanted to like beam him so i like stood up on the toilet and was gonna like throw it down at him i'm holding this like sopping wet uh paper towel and i'm looking down at who i thought was gonna be jack party different guy on my floor and he just looked up he was like what oh no and then i think did you have any relationship with the man i mean it was like a small school we knew each other there was also one i'm trying to remember if that was if that was the one that i was involved in or there was another one where someone dumped the trash can of paper towels on another kid and it was there were a lot of like freaky freaky friday in the

bathroom there was not much to do in winter park but someone like dumped a bunch of paper towels and it was another guy too like this happened on multiple occasions that it was the wrong i remember this is freshman year yeah it was the only i only lived in the dorms for one semester yeah i remember freshman year sharing a bathroom with the kids next door were these like football players and i just remember like being in there and looking at our bodies next to each other and being like this is just insane like i'm a boat i mean i still have a little boy's body but i really did did you tell them like how insane you know we'd be brushing our teeth next to each other like fuck dude what the fuck god your body's insane yeah i used to wear a hairspray

in like uh i think freshman year of high school and we used to have like the biggest scariest basketball players that shared the locker room with us right and my ass would just be like hairspraying yeah my hair everyone i was like they probably thought i was a fucking loser man good morning every morning doing like a pound of hair wait what uh what were you like shaping it into mohawk right yes mohawk yeah yeah i had like little horns that came up you had the like insane clown posse yes yeah exactly we should get some fago after this dude herb herb uh and i were driving back from gainesville and he i didn't know what fago what i'd heard it from the song but he said a woman in front of him was buying like a shit ton of fago but was paying with cash

and like nickels and stuff and we were like just trying to get on the road and he was like he was in there for 10 minutes and then when he came back i was like what happened because someone was just counting out nickels to buy like a 12 pack of fago what is fake what is like soda it's like a detroit thing and then it kind of became adopted by insane clown posse fans so it's sort of like oh that's oh really i thought it was um i thought it was a little mosey thing blueberry fago yeah no i mean maybe i don't know he could be from detroit maybe but it's a big like icp the juggalos is it good i've never had it you know where they sell it is at uh tavern on main because it's like a lion's bar it looks like it looks like it would send you into like orbit

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Will you answer? Head to the promotions tab at betmgm.com for full prizing and terms. Let's get back into the episode. Billy was saying yesterday that he, this is like a little flare-up I think he has with the tism, so I'm curious if anyone else deals with this. Every time he gets one of those codes

that's like to log into something, and it's like six digits and he gets he gets texted he's always like i've had that one before he's convinced every time he gets a code that he's had it before and he actually asked me to bring this up because he wants to know if he's alone because i told him that is not something i've ever experienced i've never had that but i've i often have the thought that it's a really easy one to guess because it'll be like oh my god it'll be like seven three three zero three three you're like you're kind of just mailing anyone could have guessed that we one time and oh fuck what was it this was a huge fight we got with my buddy declan uh in high school there was some code for

something and he was convinced that it was too easy to guess because it was a year like it was like the code was like 2008 or something but it was just like a random code yeah he's like that one's too easy it's a year we're like that doesn't matter like no one's gonna think like oh it's probably a year if it's a random year yeah yeah even why would they guess that year well the housing crisis was fresh on people's minds that's probably where you yeah you're right Declan how's he doing Declan Sykes I don't know I think I just beat him in fantasy but he's probably doing okay you're probably fine right Declan we know I knew a guy named Declan who is you man he was on my little league team and he had like a metal heart like you know they like when you're like

a baby like from is that a thing tin man I think that was like a pacemaker I think that was it was like how our parents i think it was just like the easiest way to explain like a boy with a metal heart declan he earned for love declan can't practice or whatever because if his heart rate gets too high or whatever and i think instead of probably explaining what a pacemaker was they were just like he has a metal heart yeah and that was like a thing that i just believed until i guess now but i thought i i was always picturing it like it was like the same shape as a heart can you google can you have a metal heart is that a thing can i have a metal heart can i have a metal heart oh yeah okay yeah he had that whoa that's interesting you know

metal heart ty ty's heart is backwards i'm being dead trail apparently there's like a there's like a uh i like that there's like the valve that's supposed to be like pushing out yeah is the one that is his in and the one that's supposed to be going in is the one that goes out my dad has a bicuspid aortic valve which i should probably get tested for because it might be genetic is that the thing from one tree hill yeah you can never play basketball again yeah can you never play basketball again that's the thing from one tree i can never play basketball and you have to work at the tow yard yeah and you can't and then you have to take all right never mind i'm not going to the doctor you have to take the

fall for your brother so that he can go to duke my brother's going to duke and then he's gonna get his girlfriend pregnant they're gonna get married at like 17 and he's gonna play for the charlotte bobcats i thought it was the hornets now and he has like a beach house and like at the beginning at the beginning are you guys just spoiling montree hill for me at the beat no this is this is what your life is yeah and then he's gonna be kind of mean at the beginning and because his dad taught him that he's supposed to not like you but then he realizes that his dad's actually the evil one and so he will slowly come around you two will become friends and he'll disown his dad and joey and then his mom's gonna sleep with his chandler will be there it was chandler there

joey chandis will be there joey phoebe brengers phoebe feel like i'm phoebe i got a good i got a good friends clip the other day that made me laugh you seen like the ross doing his tv bit thing oh where he's like i think ross is doing his tv bit because there he lives in the apartment that you could see next to him they're like no i think he's actually just watching tv and then it cuts to him and he's like and his tv his tv's off wait that's awesome it was it's like right up you that i think i think there are some friends stuff that's right up your alley okay yeah do you guys change with your windows open yeah and here and i'm actually glad you brought this up yeah i was uh in my bedroom a couple months ago and flan and i were looking

out the window and there was a woman walking around naked in the apartment building next to us and it was for some reason i didn't watch it for more than a handful of seconds but there was something really fascinating about it like you couldn't make out any of her features it wasn't like sexual at all but it was like are there people that are watching me do that like do they see me walk to my bed like naked with my headphones on and then like i like lay down for 45 seconds and i get up and go get in the shower do they see that yeah probably maybe i mean i was at a party recently and we were out on the balcony and we were like oh naked dude like it was like way across but you can like kind of see the outline of this guy like in his apartment and my friend

had like the new iphone and she was like oh and like zoomed it like honestly i didn't even in my mind there was like no way that you would ever have gotten it because we're like is that a naked dude like i think that's a naked dude and she was like let me see zooms in naked lady and you see everything and we were all like oh i might be like a crime yeah it's all but it was like well like is that a naked guy and then i was like oh man yeah like i saw like her you saw her breasts push you saw her push i saw her yeah i saw her brush what i'm saying is i saw her bush how did that make you feel that shit made me i said man what is this a skull and bone society with all that bush come on call back that's it what's your stance on bush um be serious

here don't do the don't do the word play joke what's your stance on bushes not a fan of the first one the second one i felt like just kind of rid the post 9-11 you know uh it was just useless and uh what is bush on main i keep getting the word bush on main yeah it was like you posted bush on main is that what it is yeah it's that simple yeah some of these trends i try and figure out and it's like it's right in front of me the whole time it's exactly what you think it would sorry what did you say people are saying like bush on main i think it's like you're posting your bush on your like main page i think it's a bar out here i i always think it's a little bit interesting when girls are like kind of perverted i don't know if this is like yeah i would have

phrased that but like um there was one time when i was doing hold the phone another show here where we were having guest collins and a guy showed his penis like on the show sorry a guy showed his like penis on the show and it was kind of like jarring and a little bit scarring i feel like for everyone involved um but then the next day after the fact when we were talking about it uh i was like yeah this guy showed his penis we have like the recording on youtube or whatever do you have a video of it i do yeah i still have the video of it and And there was, like, maybe a girl or two at the office that was like, ooh, I want to see it. And I was, like, kind of surprised by that.

Because I feel like all the time online, girls are always like, I don't want to. Guys send me dick pics. I don't want to see that. I don't want to see a guy naked or whatever. I got prank called. And I want to know who did it. I get a call. When did I text this?

You texted a call? No, I texted them. Like, who is this? I said, oh. so someone calls me and i go hello and they go hi and i go hi who's this and they go hayley and i go who sorry i don't have this number i think you have the wrong number and she goes it's cameron dallas and then hangs up and i texted them and i go i refuse to believe i just got cameron dallas who is this and they didn't they didn't they didn't tell me so it's been

driving me nuts you got cameron dallas something about wait that's like one of like my favorite mad con boys something about getting prankled and not being able to figure out who it is there's something that drives me crazy more than anything in the world wait what is what is he up to cameron dallas yeah pull him up he makes music really yeah i guess you would know you're from there expelled he's a dad his dad's name is dan dallas that's a great name 26 million followers holy shit that is insane yeah wait is this ai is that an ai dog you killed five trees to make this i hope you're happy see that's the kind of stuff we're subjecting ourselves to yeah wait is that raccoon is he

just posting a bunch of ai stuff i guess oh no that looks like a real that might be real yeah i don't see a sora i think that guy was actually in magcon too that's nash grier what are we doing right now here's a funny thing that happened i so like skims reached out and they're like hey we want to like send you guys stuff from our like fall collection i wore it last night as did i it sounds like we got inadvertently got the exact same pajamas yeah uh but it appears that our co-worker dan powers did as well and he posted this video the other day and he's like all right i need to know what you guys think about this fit and i'm like in my phone in my bed rotting in my new pajamas and i'm like i don't know my brain's like shut off my god what

fits it gonna be and then he i didn't know that everyone got the same pajamas at the time so it cuts him and he's wearing the exact outfit i'm in and he's like what do y'all think and i was like like i thought it was like like hallucinating for a second obviously i figured out like what happened that because there were only so many options and i guess yeah we all gravitated towards that one when they asked what we wanted but like can you imagine watching real like what do y'all think of my fit and then it cuts the guy wearing your exact outfit in that moment because then i go to the comments i'm like i hope they say they like it sorry i had a call with their ad scene and they said originally you guys were trying to get the bush panties yes and so

you could post bush on main but then they said no and then then you guys got i want i want the pajama here's a free bush on main here's like i missed here's a free idea for skims to take yeah change nothing about the pajamas but on the seam line the the waistband just have a little bit of bush hanging out of the top because here's the thing artificial bush yeah what's the sexiest thing a man can do in the morning andrew um he reaches for the cereal in the top drawer and his shirt comes up and you see that a little bush with the happy trail oh it's the it's a translucent shirt that has a happy trail down the middle and leads to your bush on main that's hanging out of your waistband or it could have like happy trail coming out the top what the hell a little bit is

happy trail sexy what the hell apparently yeah do you have a happy trail hell what can i still have body hair you know that no it's been coming in thank you is happy can i still have a happy trail if the rest of my body is covered in hair also yeah because it's just like the line line okay we're gonna blur this but i'm gonna show you guys my tummy you tell me if i if i have a happy trail okay blur it though blur it andrew is this happy trail yeah okay we're gonna make this hd when west jet first took flight in 1996 the vibes were a bit different people thought denim on denim was peak fashion inline skates were everywhere and two out of three women rocked the rachel while those things stayed in the 90s one thing that hasn't is that fuzzy feeling you get when

west jet welcomes you on board here's to west jetting since 96 travel back in time with us and actually travel with us at westjet.com slash 30 years yeah i mean it's definitely thicker in the middle right is this bush on main am i doing yeah am i doing bush is this doing anything for you is this or is anyone hard am i is my bush on you gotta go some go deep is my bush on main what are we doing so you talk about poop penis bush oh you know what we should talk about there were there was a playmate that drove five fucking hours to come say hi to willie and i oh we do it we gotta talk about the mug that yes would you like to do the mug recap yeah mug recap this is um nice

no uh we had an awesome weekend yeah in gainesville florida uh the most playmates that have ever come to one of these events there was a ton of people everyone was so nice there were these girls drove five hours from the from the club or something yeah they couldn't really follow from miami they came from a club they drove they said that they dm'd you a picture of the them at the club and we're like we're coming and you it was called space and you left it on reddit they were at club space you read it you left it on reddit i've always wanted to go to that uh if you're gonna open message you gotta like them edrics they can tell when they read them i um don't remember that i didn't open the account like once this whole weekend i think it was like last week or something

oh it was last week oh oh okay i do know who you're talking about then i think her name's like kp or something kb i don't know to be fair i've liked every one of her messages except but she put us on a group chat so i think you guys i don't think this is her i think it is i think i know you're talking about so her and her friend drove up yeah and they got a car crash on the way they got a car crash oh and they came just on the way there just to tailgate with us and then drove back to fort lauderdale it was one of the it was one of the most viral playmate moments it blew my mind i felt bad we should reach out and send her uh merch i feel bad that anyone wants to go out of their way to meet us sometimes i would go out of my way to not be around me so i was it was me was

it bella ponikowski i think so yeah yeah uh she was not at club space but that's all right oh no then she looks like she's in a waffle house i think yeah i think she said after club space oh okay um but we had we had we had a viral viral mug tailgate yeah honestly i was off that mug i'm gonna tell you this i had that dog in me no it was fun florida's cool it was beautiful the root beer was flowing the vibes were high the vibes were through the roof i had a chicken sandwich i watched a little football yeah it was that chicken sandwich busting that's awesome i met a couple playmates we met we met one of the nicest guys i've ever met in my life oh philip yeah yeah like that guy that guy was goaded dude we uh they were like for an instagram story can

you like make a root beer float and it's just like and i was like sure so i like i'm making a root beer float but it's just like for this like old guy who like definitely didn't realize he was going to be in the instagram story so he's like he started getting like nervous what do you guys think of gainesville i actually i didn't love it from like a city perspective i think it was kind of mid but i liked like the the like nature was kind i mean kind of reminded me of like charleston a little bit but like i went on a run the first day like they had this like trail just like through the woods and it was like just like beautiful like the swamp it's like a swamp but it's like pretty and they were like deer i almost hit a deer on my run i was running

himself with myself not in a car or anything i'm running down this trail head down i'm like i'm going for a while at this point getting kind of tired and uh i look up and there's a deer two feet in front of me like just not even looking and i looked i was like oh and he kind of looked up at me and then he like went to one way and i went the other way yeah but then when i came back there were like two deer on the side it was like there were a lot of deer it was it was really cool how far did you run i did 10 miles on friday or yeah and then five on saturday so on saturday i got up uh a playmate brian was his name comment on my strava he's like because he saw i'd run the one day he's like you want to go run tomorrow and i was like kind of drunk and i was like yeah

let's do it so then i got up and uh you ran with a playmate yeah and he showed me all around the like florida campus and it's awesome kind of the athletic facility and stuff i saw the house that pete alonzo built that's what they're calling it i guess and uh he was the nicest guy yeah and it was great it was fun i want to like maybe do that more or not it was it was fun to like because we got to meet use the playdate run club strut prc baby yeah my parents met at university florida oh really yeah so they uh so they had the idea of making you yes i was kind of like was conceived i was a kind of a brain thought um there you should get oh guys we want to take a quick moment to talk about a new sponsor of the pod not so new anymore

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there are to charge all my stuff it should be illegal the way they're like making up new cords don't even get me started uh yeah like we have ai robots that deliver our groceries but we have to travel with like 15 cords when i go on a vacation it's honestly bs can i say bs fire away thankfully i've got the five in one ridge travel power bank this thing has everything you could ever need it's got all the cords built in so you don't have to bring the cords see right in the end there look at that come on lightning apple watch charger usbc wireless charging usbc lightning no more juggling adapters and wall outlets at the airport just to get to 20 uh it's magsafe compatible too so you can attach it to the back of your phone if you got that new

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talking about the power bank but i just want to say while we're here the ridge wallet go to best wallet last wall you ever need to get can't recommend it enough guys one thing to pack five ways to power you can find ridge's power bank at best buy or our listeners can get 10 off at ridge.com by using code playdate at checkout just head to ridge.com and use code play date and you're all set after your purchase they will ask you where you heard about them please support our show and tell them that our show sent you let's get back into the episode i'm gonna be honest i peed and then i saw skylar and then i was just like chatting it up with skylar and i was like oh fuck i guess uh so i'm sorry all right should we roadmap it up yeah guys we

have a beautiful episode for you guys today we're gonna hear your pitches followed by our pitches and then we're gonna do uh am i the asshole and then we'll do this guy rocks followed by teach me something we met a playmate out there that was like why do you guys not do the theme song anymore we're like where where were you defending us this guy rocks this guy rocks this guy rocks today hey hey instead of this guy rocks then he rocks so hard he rocks in your house and he rocks in your yard there's rocks in my yard thank you he nails it every time andrew nelson and then after teach me something we're gonna do horror movies that don't exist it is feeling spooky around here and let me tell you we are excited about it uh and then and then we're gonna do ways to scare

your friends you can use you can use these you can use them on your friends on your uncle on your grandmother on top of a grape on top of a grape you can use them in the dark the light the you can use them at dusk you can get naked you can do them naked you can do them to ex-girlfriends that you haven't talked to in forever and you're looking for kind of a way to spark the conversation again you can do them to try to just take one minute to make it stop make the thoughts stop because when you're scaring you're not thinking about like everything you've done and all no you're just scaring just that's the beauty of of of scaring right is in that split second while you're scaring someone makes the voices stop you're not hearing anything in in your head

because you're putting it out on it right do you remember our the first time we hung out no i'm so sorry i am so sorry i burped no we were in austin texas at the house of internet yep and i think we talked about the first time we ever met i think we talked about a company where you could hire us to haunt your house do you remember this no oh what was the we had an idea would haunt your house to bring the property value down or to like freak someone out or like get them the move or something i like it like if you want to i mean maybe it's like focus on or maybe it's like you want to buy a house and there's someone that lives there so you hire us and we will over the course of a few weeks meticulously haunt the house okay how would we do it

rig the doors so they creak i mean that's just step one that's like baseline creaky doors is like all right that's just the entry point yeah oh uh uh rig the floorboard so when you step in it pops up and hits you in the face like a cartoon that's actually a really good idea yeah uh all right should we do the pitches andrew let's hear a pitch what was that segment again that was hot that was first time oh wait can we guess at 51 yes uh uh angelina jolie oh carloftis kar yeah i met him actually well you met him yeah at the espies You met George Karloftis? Yeah.

Damn it. I really thought it was going to be Karloftis. Terrell Suggs. Huh. 55. Sean Merriman? No, I already did that. Maybe try Sean Merriman.

Ooh, that reminds me. That reminds me. I got you a present, but I'm saving it for Christmas. It was originally going to be for me, and then I was driving home after buying it, and I was like, if he saw that I had this, he would be mad, so I'm going to give it to you for Christmas. But now that means I have to get...

I wonder if it's a LaDainian Tomlinson thing. Did I just snipe it? Damn. Is it a cameo? He was driving home from buying a cameo. how the fuck did you just do that well i mean it was like a old charger well i wonder what it is it's fucking awesome i can't wait do you want to just know yeah i went to this jersey shop yesterday because i wanted to get a vintage randy moss jersey yeah and i saw junior seau jersey and

i was like oh can i have a junior seau jersey too and he got up on the ladder and then when he was picking through that i was like is that lt and he was like yeah and i was like let me get one of those vintage lt jersey wait what how about like i'll buy it from you no it's your christmas present it's navy but i have to wait till christmas yeah because it's like the season right now i'd like where you just want it now yeah okay you can have it now let's go it's a vintage navy lt jersey dude i used to have when i was a little i had a it's an it's it's nfl certified wait that's the coolest thing of all time so i was so mad about it because i was just like i should if i had the junior say i want i could totally wear that but if i was just like walking

around in an lt jersey you would like fall to your knees i mean that yeah oh that is sick though it's really cool that's really nice you're welcome uh i got the vintage randy boss one because i'm going to the vikings game on saturday oh fun oh it's a vikings thursday vikings chargers because flan and her brother are vikings fans uh and so i'm gonna be that's not like messed up right if i'm not a vikings fan but i'm wearing a vikings jersey you are talking to the right guy i'm just there to support right yeah of course yeah yeah there's no problem with that but i'm all is it what okay i left a key detail i'm also gonna be wearing a vikings hat that's fine that's that's what i would do i was thinking about also wearing my jj mccarthy

michigan jersey but then i was like florida oh that'd be fun too yeah but i got already got the rainy moss one yeah okay andrew what do you want for christmas i was thinking i already have an idea oh but can i know what the idea is yeah well i was gonna try to sell should i just who why do we keep secrets why do you want i mean this man the christmas shopping i've never met anyone who starts earlier here's the thing so you know how everyone's giving me shit for getting too drunk and ordered all my family's Christmas presents. Two of them got backordered, won't be delivered until early December now.

So if I had waited, they wouldn't have got there on time. That's genius. I was thinking about finding some like Minions artist and like getting you somehow involved in the Minions, but I don't know how. Somehow involved in the Minions. I love that.

Like a painting of like you as Groob and then all the Minions. What is the connection? Did you grow up as Groob? Did I grow up with Gru? Did I grow up with Gru? What is your connection? Vector is loosely based on Andrew.

My first time was with a minion and I just haven't forgotten. I'm actually thinking... You see those tweets that are like, you could not trust my horny ass with a minion. You could not trust my horny ass with a football. The one with Spongebob where he's like, dude, I could not work with Spongebob.

He's like, yeah, man, he's way too positive. He's like, all them holes he got? he goes nah never mind he's way too porous what about i was everything i was thinking about halloween costumes and i wish it could have done this on our draft but i think another good one would be peeping grew where it's like a minion with like it's like little wiener out or something and then like grew with like binoculars did i ever tell you about he's like sorry i don't know I just went to immediately hijack

no no it's like peeping Gru I don't get it what's the play on that like a peeping Tom but like oh oh oh the minion has his

little schmeckle out yeah or like now I get it or maybe a skirt and it's like an upskirt I just feel like Gru has a selfie stick that's going up

it would be a fun way to take Gru but kind of make it like an adult theme okay so Gru so there's a minion there's a minion wearing like a sexy

miniskirt and then Gru has like a mirror on his shoe that he can like look put under the skirt a mirror on his shoe peeping did you just come up with that no unfortunately no i've never really fast never done that i saw wait do you guys actually not see the vision though peeping i don't see the vision it's not a play on i usually try and go along with it you know what no i'm putting my foot down i don't get it i don't i don't see peeping grew well when it's everywhere at every halloween party i think you're crawling back to me hottest halloween costume between you and i've been grew

peeping grew imagine walking into a halloween party and there's just a million like peeping a million it's like everyone did it yeah minion with like a huge dog it's just a million perverts it's like a couple's costume what are you maybe it doesn't babe get over here it doesn't make sense without you exactly see that's what y'all missing right it's a couple's costume right peeping grew i'm it do you want to do it oh and then like vector could have like a huge boner yeah i mean whatever i mean you're like no i would ruin it yeah yeah well if the girl's doing the upskirt thing and there's a million peeping grooves does that mean a million dudes are gonna peep on your girl no i think the girl is grew oh yeah you put the grew slides his mirror shoe under it's just

straight grundle sounds like a villain in district will me did i tell you last night was a grundle did i tell you about my our we went to visit our family friend one time and he had binoculars and i looked through them and they were shooting straight into the pilates studio down the street wait don't you aim binoculars yourself no that's like what i was saying it's like he had it like fixed usually they're like fixed up at like a telescope you had like a telescope yeah yeah Sorry, sorry. Okay. Sounds like you were, like, his binoculars.

His binoculars went straight to the Pilates. No, he moved into a new apartment in New York, and I looked through his telescope, and it was pointed directly at, like, a Pilates or a Zumba. That's a bummer. All right, let's hear a pitch. What the hell are we doing? How'd you get us to strike with Peep and Groot? Peep and Groot!

It's the hottest costume of the year. I actually don't see why y'all don't see the vision. It's gonna be every party. Every day. okay um it's everywhere hello dwight creed and stanley what's the worst part about having to wake up before a big event screed uh um you get anxious and then you can't sleep you're still yeah you're still taught you're trying to squeeze a nap in but you're still tired the worry that you'll oversleep introducing mr wake me up mr wake me up is a service where you hire a man of

any ethnicity or stature to stay in your home for the night and wake you up pause good yeah they're being inclusive but mentioning it obviously we weren't thinking you now i'm worried now i'm worried that i'm crazy for thinking that was a weird detail to include do you think it would be wrong if you could like pick what ethnicity yeah dude that would be wrong it's like a menu there was a guy from like belarus or something who he finished my desk and then he was like waiting for his friend to pick him up and instead of like just waiting outside or something he was just like standing it would have been normal if he was like can i sit on the couch or something until my friend gets here but he just like stood by my trash can for

like 30 minutes oh geez yeah i've had great experiences with those guys i've never gotten at task rabbit i guess i'm just so handsy myself handy handy i wasn't even doing a bit but a handsy brother like me could not be around a task rabbit let me tell you he's your big muscles bald head why do you why are you always building like your own furniture i am way too handsy to have a task rabbit around i did dude i moved a couch yes i got a new couch yesterday how was that fine i don't really want to talk about it it's cool um no my my guy was great he mounted my tv and he goes yo watch this as soon as he put them out in the wall he just hangs on it he like grabbed it it was like swinging on it like watch watch this yeah and i was like i was like no no no no and he

was just like swinging back forth he goes no it's fine it's fine dude look he's like do you want to try it i was like no i'm good just because you can't just because you can hang from my tv doesn't mean i want you to exactly you can play anything on this it won't fall off yeah exactly all right sorry so any a person of any ethnicity or stature and stature comes in so you can get like a skinny asian guy you could get like a huge fat white guy you could get like a jacked why does the white guy have to be fat i think are we the fattest we gotta be the fattest right come on said i'm the biggest the largest okay okay are you a horror fan mr wake me up will enter your room with a chainsaw to rise you from your slumber you're a fan of comedy mr wake me up will surprise you with some

casual feet tickling and storytelling what was this what was the rest of the that that one felt um personal yeah like a like a personal attack that one was funnier that one was good are you proud of that oh my god do you realize your butthole is angled like directly at my andrew's 30 feet away it smells like grue have you been hanging out with grue you broke your camera bro's farts i broke the camera you broke your camera is that real yeah my fart broke a camera yeah how long has it been broken when i farted since will will's farts were banned by the geneva convention oh the geneva convention sounds kind of fun yeah it's like all about fashion switzerland i guess

yeah banking wait i can't do anything because my camera's broken he'll come in and wake you up with comedy and then and then what happened what else happened wait i think i do something no stop what happens i want to i'm being rude to this okay so if you want to wake up with style be ready uh to go to all your important events don't be afraid to give us a call okay here's how here's the one i would hire from i would hire guys to dress like secret service and every time they wake me up they'll say that i have to solve some international con it's urgent it's yeah yeah and they get me dressed and then they kind of do that whole role play with me and then i can go to my important event yeah i mean i like this what i would prefer though some sort

of wallace and gromit type operation have you are you familiar with wallace's wake up method no can you look up wallace waking up from bed my guess is it shoots him out of bed it's my turn for breakfast this morning gromit i like a three-minute day i was pretty damn lips him out i was pretty damn right to his trousers I like that a lot. Oh, man. Look at that. I'm sold.

Pretty good, right? Yeah. All right. Are you impressed? I could be in the writer's room for Wallace and Gromit. Yeah. Well, now they're making you pick, but whatever. Wallace or Gromit?

Yeah, Wallace or Gromit. What's the worst part about wearing jeans and having to get your phone out of your pocket? It's like, it's fucking impossible. Yeah. Jean pockets that snap from the front. So all your stuff is in your pockets. You tear them away like basketball pants. All your contents are perfectly laid out on your thighs.

You grab what you need. Wait, they're just like pasted onto your thighs? No, they're held together by like buttons. Oh, okay. No, not the, the items are just to happen to be balancing there. So I rip it open, everything falls out and then I can just snap them and pick what I want. i don't think i understand this at all i can't get into my jean pockets when i'm sitting down so i want them to open like basketball pants so that the contents fall and then i can pick what i

want oh okay when i want to put things back in you should have said it like that if i want to i was just picturing if you're standing up and do it everything would fall on the ground yeah well when you're standing up you can just put them in got it got it got it yeah or you could just maybe snap them once a little bit easier yeah that makes sense willie what do i do if i want to put stuff back in i snap them open snap them balance everything on my thighs snap them back in i remember getting tearaway pants one time and they were really fun but it is so meticulous to like put them back on it's like not worth unless you have a trainer yeah to like do them once you rip them off it's kind of annoying we got uh at saturday morning basketball the high

school kids would like be our coaches and if you won like a drill you got to like pick a thing from their like gear selection and i got the tearaway pants one day and i wore them to one of our middle school games and went to rip them off and they were like clearly like from the 80s because all the buttons had like rusted shut and so i like could not get them off i just had to take them off like regular pants that's funny all right you want to hear my pitch of course oh i think oh what's the worst part about a plant in your house it i'm so worried that i'm gonna fall off of my watering schedule and kill it i have like eight plants in my room and i have to set reminders of when each thing needs to be watered so i was gonna say it's like it's growing

but like you can never like tell when it's growing like it just like happens slowly over time but like it'd be fun if you could like see it growing right it's a plant that only grows when you look at it okay it senses your eyes and when you're looking at it it grows a little so you can be like oh like you know like you ever see like a video of like a time lapse of a plant where it's like horse it's so cool so it's a plant that just grows when you look at it i like that i like that and then you get it to wait where you want and they just can't look at it that money tree that angus got me yeah one's so money has engulfed my let my orient express lego oh nice and uh and i think you're supposed to like prune it or trim it but yeah i've never seen it grow just one day it

was like 12 inches longer than imagine if you were looking at it how fun would that be it'd be a fucking blast uh let me know if this makes me a bad person but i bought uh flowers for my girlfriend while she was visiting this weekend yeah bad guy move wait you don't have to applaud you bought flowers for your girlfriend when she was visiting for your own birthday for my own birthday yeah but that's not the part did you let her play with them for a little bit and then you said it's actually my birthday let me play with them yeah well she was actually saying all weekend that was her birthday so we were kind of celebrating her the whole weekend um but no but uh she left and last night i was like my apartment smells really really weird and i realized it's the smell

coming from the flowers and i don't like the smell does that make me a bad person if i don't like the smell wait you got her the flowers she's gone you can chuck them yeah and she left some no some flowers smell i mean they're probably going bad you think so dying yeah they smell like fine it just like makes my apartment kind of smell like bacon weirdly enough bacon yeah or bacon bacon you get like a you get like a bacon flower what what you want bro that's weird rods with bacon on them what kind of flowers are they sunflowers and lilies oh flame likes lilies too lily could you be my she wants she wants calla lilies next and i can never find them they're from traded joes i don't know if that you should get you should always get

your lady flowers because they get really excited they do i should try that i haven't done that dude just go to whole foods pick out three different types of flowers bring them to the lady they'll wrap them into a perfect bouquet for you and we'll just be like i got you flowers yeah and then they like freak the fuck out really oh my god w especially if you get the brown wrap with the uh the string well you want to take them out a lot of people think that that's fancy you're supposed to take them out of the wrapping before you give them to them oh you just give them loose no they're held together by by rubber bands and then you give them to them they put them in all their pretty bases but you give it to them like raw all right

like no wrapping i don't want to tell you how i give it to my lady actually that's really inappropriate he's good he's in here all right do you want to hear my this guy rocks this is a some sort of tantric yoga class and they are awakening the hand trick i don't know man they're some like hippie stuff and they're awakening the first chakra so this is funny as is but the screenshots i want you to wait until the very end and there's a guy in the back that really makes me laugh but just that the general video is still good new from nespresso blend wellness into your coffee routine with a coffee plus range infused with functional benefits choose the coffee you love with added b vitamins like coffee plus b12 to help support immune function

and coffee plus b6 to keep your day moving or go with the flow and choose ginseng delight our new double espresso with ginseng extract whatever lies ahead don't change your morning Let your morning change you. Discover Coffee Plus on Nespresso.com. The guy in the back. Look at the guy in the back. Wait, I didn't see it. Like, wait, there's like one.

So it's all like women doing it to their partners. And then I think one guy is confused and he's doing it to his wife. wait i'm like so confused about this whole operation people know each other surely they're couples okay if they're not there's something very wrong i mean there's something weird regardless but i think to each their own as long as it's like a consensual couple but like if i just went to yoga this is like uh would you go to would you go to school if this was gym class and tony hawk was the principal yeah i would go to yoga if this was what it was all right let's see willies

so far i wish there was i was kind of hoping there'd be like one guy that was like rock hard but yeah you checked everyone yeah beggars can't be choosers are you seeing this guy no i'm excited this is like insanely impressive i know i just also think it's so funny that there's like people just like living life in the background like all right yeah i don't get that comment what the bottom comment average bisexual chair sitting do you think he's a climber and this is like i mean his last name is climberoo so even the baby's like wow

i mean that's some like sometimes you see anything it's like that is so impressive but oh my god why did you spend so much time figuring out how to do that yeah that's crazy i could do that okay have you guys ever heard about the time hitler was almost assassinated i learned this last night on by a time traveler no i learned this last night called on a documentary called hitler and the nazis evil on trial okay and this blew my mind there was this like rich i wish i wrote down more i was watching the documentary half sleep and i just jotted down what i quickly gathered there's this like super rich aristocrat guy who like joined the nazis and they sent him to north africa he gets horribly injured like loses an eye loses one hand and then loses like

a bunch of fingers on the other end so he's like whatever the nazi party i guess was starting to be like hitler clearly is gonna fight to the end and like destroy germany so they were a lot of nazis like we're turning on him basically and there was a small group that was like we have to assassinate him because he's just gonna destroy germany so they send this one guy who was like trusted by hitler that aristocrat guy with the eye and the arms and uh and they put a bomb in his briefcase two bombs in his briefcase he gets to this place he thought they were going to be doing this meeting in like a fortified like concrete room but they're just doing it in like a wooden cabin so he's like oh my god maybe the the blast isn't going to be as uh severe he has to use the bathroom so he can

arm the bomb they're like banging on the door like what are you fucking doing in there and so he can only arm one of them he then goes into the room puts the briefcase right down next to hitler using the uh excuse that his hearing was damaged from his injuries or whatever so he had to be right next to hitler he puts the briefcase as close as he can to him and then he excuses himself he says he has to go make a phone call and then he's walking away to get back to his car so he can escape and when he's gone unbeknownst to him one of the other nazis moves it but moves the briefcase like behind this big wooden table and like away from hitler totally would have killed him and it detonates the guy is like awesome i just killed hitler and then finds out when he gets back to

like whatever uh coup he was in their like headquarters that like through some miracle he was like he came out like pretty much unharmed but then he went after that he was so mad and so like paranoid that he went like ballistic jesus how did i know that that's insane not that he had not already been going ballistic but he like took it took it up a notch he was like cracked out by the end of his like he was on meth life yeah that's like one of a handful of of times where it like doesn't make any sense that he survived it happened in like world war one happened a handful of other times yeah you got like mustard gassed yeah uh all right should we do our drafts yep willie do you want to start with horror movies that don't exist or ways to

scare your friends uh what do you think ways to scare your friends yeah let's do it all right You want to tee it up? Yep. These are ways to scare your friends. Okay, this is, you're going to hide places, but you don't jump or yell at them. Okay? You just, hiding. What?

What? You go to, I, sorry. So, like, you know how normally when you scare someone, you hide somewhere and then you jump or yell at them? Right. Don't, get rid of the jumping and yelling at them. i want people in the corners of their friends bedrooms completely silent right they're getting ready for bed they turn that's scarier yeah right that is much scarier silently just waiting places yes we gotta we gotta get this going yep uh okay have a fake amber alert sent out to their phone

that someone with their exact description and car is uh is in trouble for a kidnapping and then have actors dressed as swat team running to your apartment he thinks he kidnapped like a kid or something love that uh make a new bug and release it in their apartment right so if they see a new bug they're gonna be scared because they've never seen that kind of bug before right it could be poisonous or lethal or venements venements venements uh install a pump on their toilet that can put like small objects into the bowl when they're pooping so when they stand up they think they pooped out like hot wheels and stuff i like that uh every time every night when they are sleeping go into the room and put everything on their shelves on the floor so every morning

they wake up and everything's on the floor and they think what the heck i'm scared just cut the brake lines on their car so they like totally ram a pedestrian when they're trying to brake at a crosswalk yep beat the living shit out of them senseless until they pass out very scary um just get a burner phone and text him pictures of squirrels eating all his bed sheets while he's at work that's good that's like a score there's like a squirrel king with that phone squirrel king squirrel yeah squirrel king have everyone say hey we're thinking about you when they leave for like weeks like can you imagine it for weeks everyone is like all right see you man thinking about you wouldn't you start to think maybe something's wrong with you yes what is this

draft you want you like insisted on doing this i like it um having fun i am yeah you like us i do put melatonin in their coffee ground so they think there's something like really wrong with them damn i'm on my willy shit i'm really hard damn i'm on my willy shit shouldn't have said that all right should we do uh horror movies that don't exist i'd like that yeah all right teed up these are horror movies that don't exist all right a sheep farmer has one sheep that like runs away into the woods and he doesn't see it for a couple days and then it like mysteriously comes back and he's like oh awesome but late at night he'll come downstairs and the sheep's like in the kitchen and so he'll bring it back out to the other sheep or whatever but like the eyes are

off they look really human and it feels like it's aware of what he's saying and then one night he comes down and the sheep is standing fully upright like a human and he realizes that when that sheep escaped a human killed it and had been wearing its body and then it starts attacking him and his family oh wouldn't that be creepy that would be creepy stiff drinks a couple on a first date starts noticing weird behavior from other patrons at the bar the guy then begins to act strange as well talking about satan and death and things like that while his eyes start to turn red as people begin to kill each other in the bar the woman realizes that everyone there is being possessed but that she isn't because she hasn't touched her cocktail whoa so she has to try to

get her date to stop drinking and save everyone before they all kill each other because like the drinks make you evil possessed i like that a lot stiff drinks is like dead oh oh all right sweethearts hey can you cut me doing that yeah replace it with this replace replace it with pow yeah uh sweethearts years after their breakup a girl runs into her high school ex-boyfriend at a bar he's like just as charming and handsome as she remembers him and it looks like he's been really successful after college uh he invites her back to his apartment for a drink and she agrees when they get there he says he's gonna go slip into something more comfortable he comes out wearing his old letterman jacket and like old jeans and he's holding her cheerleader

uniform she's like really creeped out so she goes to leave she hears the door lock like through some remote system he's like you live here now he shows her a room that's like an old classroom that like looks like their high school and he says every day when he gets home from work they after role play and she has to pretend to be his high school girlfriend and we watch her try and escape this psychopath the axe man returns so the axe man of new orleans has come back and if you remember the the original story was they would play jazz to like avoid make him not come and kill them well guess what he now loves jazz so the axe man is back and it followed the movie follows a band who's trying to figure out what kind of music he doesn't like so they go through

short sort of iterations of different genres and apparently he's got like a really wide taste um and they have to figure out the one genre that will stop the axe man lift a string of gym attacks happens to bodybuilders leading up to the mr universe competition uh when they're like bench pressing a masked person will come in and like push the bar down on them he'll like hold them down on the treadmill and like burn their skin and they're like what is this uh and then they all arrive at the mr universe thing and wait one second this sounds like a psych episode what's your watch psych no oh so it was just well go ahead okay uh no one can catch them and then at the competition the music cuts and a man's face is projected and he says that he was bullied as a

kid for being scrawny so he's gonna torture all these people and they lock the auditorium doors and they block the signal so no one can call for help and he just like plays all these sick and twisted games on the bodybuilders that's like not like a specific psych episode but like psych is like they're detectives yeah and every episode it's like a different like kind of like i feel like they pick like a category so you're like weightlifting and then it's like all these weightlifters are dying and then it culminates at like the big weightlifting event where they have to solve it i like that it sounds like a good show it's a great show psych is awesome i mean it's like now it's it might be it might be old but dry cleaned after a series of unexplained

manic episodes that resulted in murders a group of detectives is on the case and soon starts to tie it all back to a nefarious high-end dry cleaner who is putting something in the clothes that is driving people mad whoa and the only way to stop them is to take the clothes to a different dry cleaner i love that all right should we do rusty's song of the day i'd love that um today i am gonna do bro google music okay no i'm scrolling through my like songs google music that people that's not true all right today's song is last mango in paris by jimmy buffett you did that two weeks ago no i didn't i'm just kidding uh i like it i like it a lot it is it's about a guy talking about all the uh cool things that he's done in his life and you're like oh well

he's probably ready to wrap up and he's like but there's still so much more to be done so he said he had the last mango in paris he took the uh last flight out of saigon it's a lot of he like he either does the first thing ever or the last thing ever if you ain't first you're last you ain't first bobby come on oh wait will you pass me that shirt sure we made a new shirt where andrew's got one new shirt on oh yeah i wish this text was lower and then we got cosmic uprising it's an inter intergalactic reggae band and this is their tour tee for the total collapse of the sun tour so go go buy those you guys have been buying the hell out of our shirts and it has our birthdays on there it has our birthdays on there secretly in our hometown come on it's my birthday

all right scott love you guys hey what's my birthday what's the headroom so tomorrow's sketch love you players bye i love you