Will & Rusty's Playdate - creating the most INSANE fantasy football rules

Episode Date: October 2, 2024

In this week’s wild Playdate, the duo takes you on a ride through everything from bees on a leash and mini golf shenanigans to the Menendez brothers Netflix series, and how Rusty nearly put a hole in his finger. They also dive into the awkwardness of forgetting birthdays and debate the true point of banana bread. Plus, they wrap up by drafting new hit game shows and sharing the very best fantasy football rules. Buckle up, Playmates—this episode is all over the place in the best way possible! FOLLOW OUR SOCIALS: https://www.flowcode.com/page/playdatepod GET 20% OFF @CHUBBIES WITH THE CODE PLAYDATE AT https://www.chubbiesshorts.com/PLAYDATE #chubbiespod TRY EVERY MAN JACK TODAY https://www.everymanjack.com/discount/PLAYDATE FOR 25% OFF YOUR FIRST ORDER. JOIN US IN DRINKING FIREBALL DURING OUR GAME DAYS THIS SEASON https://www.fireballwhisky.com/. MUST BE 21+. GO TO HTTPS://WWW.LUCY.CO/FRIDAY AND USE PROMO CODE FRIDAY FOR 20% OFF YOUR FIRST ORDER. WARNING: THIS PRODUCT CONTAINS NICOTINE. NICOTINE IS AN ADDICTIVE CHEMICAL. (00:00) Intro (01:43) Rusty Went Crowd Surfing! (08:40) Dating a Ghost (12:05) Menendez Brothers (15:04) Airplane Story (18:32) Eating as a Kid (29:05) Rusty’s Time as a Welder (38:27) Stories from our Parents (48:56) Forgetting Birthdays (56:05) Roadmap (58:14) Pitch Submissions (01:04:46) Pitches (01:16:06) This Guy Rocks (01:22:31) Teach Me Something (01:29:06) Game Shows that Don’t Exist (01:36:09) Fantasy Football Rules (01:42:51) Whose Personality are you Stealing? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In Toronto, every arrival is a statement, and nothing says it better than this. Cadillac Optic was the number one selling luxury EV in Canada for 2025. Find your rhythm across a seamless 33-inch display and an immersive 19-speaker AKG surround audio system. This city demands agility, and Optic delivers with precision to make every drive extraordinary. Let's take the Cadillac. Find out more at cadillaccanada.ca. Luxury sales claim based on S&P Global Mobility Canadian New Vehicle Total Registrations for calendar year 2025 for the cadillac definition of luxury all right guys we're in our new state of the art studio as you can see yep we're moving offices and so for the time being we're recording

in will's living room this is my living room uh excited to have you guys here this feels very bizarre yeah it feels strange i like what you've done with the place yeah okay so we had like i don't know how much of this is in frame but the uh yeah this place was like an airbnb before we got in here and the art very much reflects that i mean this i don't can you see this lauren is this in the frame there's like what is that like someone pissed on this and like it's like running i think they were going i mean they probably didn't piss on it but oh yeah i see it it's like running i think it was an artistic choice yeah it came like that uh something like that and you got a nice dock right above you yeah behind lauren it says the beach is my happy

place it was like a big surfboard were you doing quantum physics on the chalkboard no that's the um so that's a little fun tidbit so i moved in here we got a like a one of those walls that's all chalkboard and uh we put the i i verbatim copied the uh equation from goodwill hunting my i think i might i've already told you this but we had a chalkboard in our basement and my he has like serious undiagnosed something okay really good at math he's like an engineering okay kid and my other friend brendan is also kind of wired that way yeah they would get together they would leave like whatever family barbecue or whatever we're doing upstairs and we'd come downstairs and they'd be doing like what happens when ketchup leaves the bottle at the speed of

light and uh that that's a fucked up burger i'll tell you that yeah i can tell you that much um i've been i've been waiting to tell you guys about this uh until we recorded but i crowd surfed at a punk show oh yes yeah yeah uh how did that go so it was a really strange day but basically i went to have you seen that woman online who's like uh why do you keep like giggling when i look over at you no i don't know a new a weird new spot it's just funny um have you seen that woman who it's kind of become a meme but she's like my father used to work at the palm restaurant and like my mother was teasing hair with the vodka bottle yeah whatever yeah you guys both know what this is yeah it's like a big big thing so i met met up with her or him uh he owns a clothing store

she she like outfits jason derulo and guys like that so just picture kind of like what they're wearing oh is this is the queen of melrose the queen of melrose yeah got it got it got it yeah and so we met up and he got me all fitted out i got a 1200 leather jacket okay uh not on my dime obviously and when i was buying it she goes jason derulo's got the same one like okay this is gonna be a hit at this punk show i showed up and everyone is wearing completely normal clothes and i'm wearing a leather jacket and uh giant like parachute pants whatever and i'm hanging out the band getting a little nervous to crowd surf whatever and uh basically the process or the the goal was there's one song it's their new hit song and there's a very crucial moment where it's

like the perfect time to stage dive yes wait what is that there's a great lyric uh if you don't like the music go the fuck home and then you jump and then i jump yeah originally it was going to be from a stage like countertop high okay right so it wasn't if you fell it wasn't gonna be that big a deal yeah we get there and the bar owner is like yeah it's probably not gonna work from there you're just gonna have to get up on the bar and jump from the ball the bar is like four feet in the air and everyone's moshing so they're not looking at you yeah so you have to just kind of hope that right before you jump they look over yeah and uh this other guy kept stage diving and falling like no one was catching him and so i'm like this isn't gonna go well me and the lead

singer get up on the bar and we're singing the chorus together and then i'm supposed to jump at the end but his microphone cord is right at like chin height so i'm like and i can't tell you got to like high jump over it i can't tell him like hey man i know you're i know you're rocking out but like you're working this cord and uh a couple of the boys were like right there ready to catch and i just overshot them by like a foot and a half thankfully the strangers caught me and i was up there for like two and a half minutes if you've never stage dived you have to try it it was i felt it was the greatest i've felt in my entire life i felt like god that i i was worried it was gonna go horribly i was too because we practiced it at this at a local pool yep because

this is all for a video how cool video you're doing so we're we're doing like a practice thing and uh he kept diving in in a way that like jammed like one of his either like if he went forwards it was like his knee went in first and if he went backwards it was like his heel went in first and i was so confident that like you were gonna jump out there and just absolutely nail someone in the head i was also wearing giant combat boots yeah and rings oh so if if i landed on sounds like a killer outfit wait how is how is jumping or practicing in a pool how is that an effective strategy so that i could i could see how i was gonna land on like a flat surface flat which he didn't oh you know you should have done you should have gone to a gymnasium

and jumped into those foam pits nasium was a was a big addition there i think jim's picturing like a gymnastics style i did gymnastics in lauren's lauren's head i have access to a do a gymnasium i don't think i've ever said the nasium part of that word nasium oh you guys i was the best it was so fun you did gymnastics yes only till fourth grade and then i every time we practiced back handsprings i would go in the bathroom and cry i think that was the root of my anxiety i don't know i was just terrified of like doing them it was scary that's fair or we had to go on the the beams and like when we when we would do stuff on the beams i was so scared i'm thinking of final destination what have you seen that no girl that you know the movie final destination now oh when

they do all that that crazy shit it's like everyone dies in crazy ways yeah and there's like a gym routine one oh god it's horrible i don't she do you want me to spoil it i mean i'm not gonna watch it she land on her well there's like every scene is like there's a bunch of things that you you think are gonna happen and it's like this lady's like on the beam and like steps on attack and it's like ah and then like hits like powder into a fan and then it sprays the girls on the bars and she gets like blinded oh my god she flies off with like the whatever those like uneven bar she like flies off and lands and just crumples into a ball like snaps wait well have you seen the one where this guy or girl is working and what i don't know i don't know

i might be making this up i think they were they worked at like a radio station or something in music and then the the volume was too high like the db level and their ears started bleeding and like exploded do you remember that one no i mean there's like six of them i think oh why did i You haven't seen almost every movie, but you've seen all the final decisions. No, I've only seen one of them. The one where the gymnast gets her neck snapped. Were you like a really strong gymnast girl at a young age, Lauren? Like physically?

I was kind of ripped when I was a little kid. There was a girl in my middle school class. Did you guys do the Presidential Fitness Award or whatever? She did 56 pull-ups. And I couldn't do one. No, I wasn't like that. 56 is crazy. yeah but i remember i was so proud of this i remember in elementary school or maybe maybe

middle school the pacer test we did like you know you do with your class yeah i got down like the second like guys and girls i was like the second one next to a guy and i was there we go i felt kind of badass i felt really cool the only one i think i was in like the high percentile one was sitting reach for some reason what does that mean there's like a box that your feet go on and you like lean forward it's like how far you can bend forward you're a good sitter and reacher and an even better reacher yeah i'm an okay i could see that being in your wheelhouse um so i just got back from michigan where i was filming a uh video where the basically the premise is uh lauren's just move the camera some things never change wherever we are lauren wants to fidget

well i didn't i couldn't see your face this is better oh you couldn't see my face before i no no no like i i couldn't see your face i was like how did that no no no no um i basically the premise of the video was like i'm having trouble dating physical human women so i'm gonna try and i was trying to go on a date with a ghost okay yeah and so you get laid no no but we went to this like abandoned insane asylum with a tour guide and uh she put me in a escape room at first it was terrible and then we go on this like hunt to find a ghost to date right yeah and i started to get comfortable and i'm like those aren't fucking real like this is you know this is malarkey and then uh we set up this picnic blanket for me to have a date with and then the the medium

or whatever has headphones in and she's communicating with me uh through a ghost woman okay but like the ghost she was being like oddly honest she was like yeah there's just not one here you know what i mean like she wasn't faking it and uh what the lady with headphones on talking to ghosts wasn't faking it no no she like she wasn't pretending to talk to a ghost she kept just being like she was like there's no one here right now let me get a supernatural girl to talk And then Skyler, Skyler's sitting in front of me, setting something up. And he goes, ow, ow. Like my back started to burn.

Look at this. This has to be a swindler's trick. There was giant scratch marks on his back. Skyler's the biggest ghost skeptic of all time. Yeah. So they have like a, they have like a secret guy with like, I was, I was three feet away from him. Nothing touched him.

There's no, I just don't, I just refuse to, if ghosts are real, then I'm going to be so fucking scared that I refuse to believe this. it was it was the most super like okay that's terrifying but like i was kind of on your side where i thought maybe skylar you know subconsciously scratched his back and then i'm making fun of the ghost for not going on a date with me and a giant table crashes in the other room where there was no one there well that they just rigged it with a bomb what like a bomb on the table oh the old bomb on the table trick yeah of course it's a bro have you ever dude it's a haunt it's this is an attraction this place you're going to yes but so obviously they have time to set up all

sorts of gimmicks like this if you were there you would understand it wasn't like there was nothing set up here it was an abandoned like barren room there's nothing there was nothing there were no like triggers in there to set stuff up they want you to think i swear to god the loudest crash i've ever heard and there was no one in the other room there was nothing that could have knocked anything over it was nuts spooky i don't i don't buy it i don't buy the look of it i think you went to like a like a like a theme like haunted house i looked the place up it's like a i'm not tickets to it i know i'm not explaining it well i'm not explaining well if you were there you would understand there was there was nothing like there was nothing gimmicky about it it was they sell tickets to it

they sell tours they sell tours sell tickets to it there's something gimmicky about it it's you're trying to make it seem like it's like a theme park yeah they sell tours they sell tours you know what else okay no you go you know what else sells uh tours what theme parks no they don't i mean tickets i guess well i mean okay it's different they they this was real this was real i'm a big skeptic i was a big skeptic this was the biggest skeptic i'll make i'm a believer there we go did you guys watch that new menendez show no but jane was talking about that it's the it's the greatest show i've ever seen in my entire life what do you think they did it or not well they did they said they did it well no i mean do you think that they

uh it was warranted yeah do you think they were diddled or they wanted the money i think they were diddled for sure i mean i think they also wanted the money but they like yeah they killed their parents because they were bad people and then a perk of that is that their dad also had i think that what's tough about obviously i can't even imagine like the what they went through like to but it's like it was like a very like like yeah they shot that they blew their parents heads off like they were shot like 10 times or something so they they they shot them they unloaded their shotguns realized they weren't dead had to go back out to the car and reload yeah and like i feel like part of their defense was like we thought they were going to kill us yeah it's like after

you shot them once with a shotgun yeah so their their initial argument was uh they thought their parents were going to shoot them that night and so they went back and killed them yeah but uh i mean that wasn't if what they were if yeah i mean if their dad really did that shit like it's pretty hard to like i had never even heard of this story until yesterday their dad was this guy named jose menendez and he was like this giant business tycoon and allegedly was very abusive to them like physically verbally and sexually and uh and then they killed their parents uh and then they they basically like they think they grabbed the real will because their dad had also told them they were cut out of the will like recently and so they found this safe they think

lyle went in and grabbed the the will that said they were out so that it wasn't there and then there was like the old they found the old will that like they got everything and then they went on this giant spending spree because they weren't even suspects initially they had like an alibi oh so for like a while they were just bawling out they bought like they bawled out so much that they like when was this 89 oh but they were in jail for seven years until they were convicted oh my god uh yeah oh fun fact eric one of the brothers uh that was part of it when he was in jail and oj killed nicole oj was in the cell next to him uh in the la county jail oh my gosh that's crazy yeah so he like whispered across and was like oj is that you and he was like yeah he's

like it's eric menendez he's like oh shit you one of those i mean obviously this is a recreation of it but like no this is paraphrasing oh in the show they had this scene yeah yeah and then apparently when oj when they got oj the guards all loved the juice so they went around and made all the prisoners clean their cells like spick and span because oj was coming that's hysterical yeah yeah i'm uh i don't know i should watch the doc i've read a lot about the story but i'm i'm there's stuff that you just said that i don't even know so i should watch it um oh we were i got off of uh who wants the plane story oh god lauren does i was getting a classist bullshit i'm no it's not it's not it's not someone commented they were like actually i can't remember

cool that was an awesome story lauren thank you something about you and like comfort plus and how you would like freak out at it i don't know someone comment someone commented or dm'd me something that said they saw me boarding uh with zone five and that i'm a fraud but here's what happened i was i was not in zone five i showed up late to the gate and i got on i was not in zone five but i was i was getting god forbid you get a regular human i was getting off i was getting off the plane yesterday and i'm calling my uber i'm so excited to get home and you know the option where it goes like do you have bags like the it'll be like do you have bags when you're leaving the airport the uber yeah sure like in the uber app yeah it'll be like it'll be like do you have bags

and you click like no or yes i've never seen that in my life i've i might have is this an uber black uh it was because i was getting curbside but that's not that's not only reason you wanted to tell this no no i've actually seen it i think okay it does that in all this is crazy it does that in all ubers from the airport but i was leaving and i clicked like no i don't have bags because i'm walking with no bags i'm halfway to the uber and then i go wait i have a bag where is it i left it on the plane oh what and i sprinted back and called someone i called lucas who was on the plane i said can you grab my suitcase but that would have been a nightmare he was still on the airplane yeah it was yeah it was a couple couple rows back you were all the way uh oh you

weren't outside i was almost outside and i called him that's quite a big yeah difference yeah quite a big gap yeah interesting makes makes you wonder where he was sitting what's the best part about feeling comfortable how good it makes your body feel agreed agreed and that is why i love me some chubbies their original stretch short i mean this is it's the real deal you don't need underwear nope you don't worry about anything and you feel like air from dionysus himself is blessing you i can't say enough good things about these shorts also i will ride this horse till it hits the end of the earth their friday shirt is so comfortable no fire it's the perfect blend of like good looking comfy easy to wear i could go on and on and i'll spare you the details but i love chubbies

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playdate 20 support our show and tell them we sent you this fall make the most of every moment with chubbies shop now and fall into comfort one stylish piece at a time let's get back into the episode do you ever get like too excited to eat your dinner and you like eat it too fast all the time yeah we were when i was a kid sometimes i would uh i would just like ravage through my plate too fast and then i'd have to throw it all back up and my mom would be like furious because it would be like now he has to eat again and to make second dinner wait that's funny i did that what i had a question i did that uh i was just gonna say i did that before a celtics game one time katie and i were uh going and we ordered shake shack before we were gonna go to the game

and i got too excited and i ate it in like 30 seconds and then i didn't want to scare her and make her think that i was like bulimic but i was like i have to go in my head i'm like i have to go throw this up like oh you like pulled trig i was like so uncomfortable with how full i was that i was like i have to get this out or else i'm gonna like like i was on the verge of like throwing up and so i went into her bathroom and i tried to run all the faucets and do it and then i came out and she was like you just throw up your dinner this had to tell her yeah but there's no like cool way to tell someone that you just throw up your dinner i don't okay that part i can't relate to that that you ate so fast that you have to go pull like i thought you're saying

like it was an involuntary thing you're just like oh i ate that too fast i'm gonna go fucking poultry that's crazy my uh my sister like hated salmon when we were kids still hates salmon i don't i don't like salmon either but uh my parents like didn't believe her they thought she was just being a picky eater and she was like no like if you make me this like i'm gonna throw up and my mom was like no you're not and then she took one bite and threw up all over the table oh my god you think she didn't like to prove a point out of spite like one bite she it was like it was like instantaneous like i don't even think she got it down that's funny uh i was gonna ask like did y'all do like in my in my home growing up it was like

on your birthday you got to like there's you got to pick the meal of course that your mom would make yep and like everyone had their like go-to yeah you're like oh laura's gonna want big z again this year yeah i don't uh i would always get my brother would always get stuffed peppers just because so dang me and laura don't like them oh that's funny yeah it was a real fuck you yeah like kind of but it was more like this is my day yeah this is sam's day yeah i would get barbecue chicken and rice pilaf i feel like it could do better than that i agreed in retro that's not what i would get now right now i would get like um filet yeah i guess i would do a steak i would do like my dad i told you guys this and you're like oh that's not good chimichurri steak remember

you made fun of you were like your dad i wasn't saying it was just you it was preceded by you saying that you had never had indian food oh that is not have to do with indian food does it you've never had indian food lauren i can't believe you've never had i just thought of another time when my when my sister uh was saying she was gonna throw up and no one believed her and then my aunt sarah lovely woman uh was big on smoothies in the morning yeah you had to finish your smoothie and then what and then we can go have have our day that's not like a punishment at all no no it wasn't a punishment at all it was just like this is good for you everyone have their smoothie before we go to like universal or something yeah and my sister was like i don't

like bananas and she was like it's fine dude like there's not you're not gonna be able to even taste it she goes i will throw up if i drink this and my aunt sarah was like no you're not you're being a brat and uh she drank there's an insult at the time a brat yeah that was like that was like the worst on a 180 yeah and uh she took one sip and threw it up that it feels like she had like an involuntary like it was always what you had to like prove a point that i think she was just picky and yeah and yeah but the banana is a weird place to draw a line in the sand yeah bananas are pretty good unless they're too mushy yeah i like when you're you're there's like uh there's a bunch of bananas that could be like a science experiment and you go to throw them out and your mom's like

i'm making banana bread with those you're like no banana bread's gas though i know but i don't like that the bananas have to be like rotten before you have to be right i think it's a lot easier not rotten they have to be like mushy no but do they have like is that or is that just like a oh you can make no they should be they should they're green like that's not gonna taste good i always thought it was just like uh like an excuse it was your mom coming up with a way to not waste food that's what i'm saying like maybe like you could do with normal bananas but they were just like well it was like yeah it was like a resourceful like she wouldn't make banana bread and less correct those were there dude uh what what was up with pumpkins growing up gross wait

what like when you had to click when you got like a pumpkin for Halloween you'd like clean the inside out yeah it was like why are we making this chore for ourselves like you my mom used to fry the pumpkin seed yum delicious all that shit is so gross everything pumpkin related freaks me out it just it it always felt to me like why are we doing this yeah like that's not something like that's like a like a like a root or like something i don't want to like eat or like a yeah it's it was a weird it was a thing that i think our parents just did growing up where they were like we i guess we have to gut all these pumpkins guys it's to celebrate you like gutting a pumpkin you like touching that shit no i don't but the the it's like the reward after you get to eat the

pumpkin seeds because you bake them they're all salty they're so good they're really good you bake them yeah i don't like them well you probably weren't making them correctly i wasn't making them ever my sister probably was no we should do now that we have all this um freedom with our new podcast should we do it outside well that or we should do a baking show or a cooking show yeah i'm down dude i honestly i like this or we can go far we can go more than the studio yeah the vibes are good yeah except i don't want to be all the way over here well yeah we can work Or I could get a better chair. Yeah, we could get you a better chair.

I could call Edge. I'm having fun. Yeah. Should I build my... I have a new Orient Express Lego. That's the one I'm most excited about. And I'm trying to decide if I should wait until Saturday so that I can truly feel like I don't have anything to do.

Or if I should just sneak it in today. Well, you couldn't do it today because we have work. Yeah, that's true. And we are booked up. We are booked up. i'm booked the f up right now uh survivor started okay and there's just there's this awesome scene in the first episode where like this one guy just starts having to break down and he's like when i cracked my coconut

nobody paid attention and when john cracked his coconut everyone cheered how old is it but also cracking your coconut sounds like a use yeah yeah yeah like uh yeah like you you got a new girlfriend like finally cracked the coconut yeah yeah oh or yeah i guess i i was thinking like a jerk like jerky oh no crack no i don't think that would be cracking your coconut i guess what happens when you crack coconut like milk comes out any saying that if you wanted to all right brothers i'm gonna go crack the coconut yeah well that's just in the context of that that scene is funny it was like i cracked my coconut and no one cared and everyone cheered um i'm not gonna not gonna name names but a mutual friend of

the three of ours did something similar to like cracking his coconut similar to like announcing that he's gonna go crack his coconut and i still haven't asked him if he was joking we were sitting around and his girlfriend was there and there was like we were all on his couch and he just goes all right I'm gonna go jerk off in the shower

and then got in the shower and took a shower and now I'm trying to figure out if he was trying to be funny or if he was just calling me shut I don't want to tell you

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what crandall sucks okay crandall sucks no oh i doubt he was probably trying to be funny i think he's probably trying to be funny he said it completely seriously oh is this keeping you sorry no i'm trying to picture it just give me him jerking off in the shower or him saying it picture us sitting on his couch and then him going all right i'm gonna go jerk off in the shower i got in the shower he's pranking he was pranking yeah he was pranking oh should we road map it up we went to you know we went to the best coffee shop in all of la today oh yeah i don't like this guy i haven't met him yet but i don't like how he's calling his shot number one barista you can't call yourself the number one barista in

California. No, someone else said that. Someone that worked there? Someone that was a patron told Jerry. He turned around and was like, this guy's the fucking best. No, Jerry was like, what's the deal with this place? And the guy's like, oh, this guy's the best barista in all of LA. Is there like a

max preps ranking? Yeah, he's a blue chip. He's committed to Duke. He tells you where your coffee's from. So mine's from Nicaragua today. And I said... is it i hope it's fair trade or you're gonna have some blood it's not on my hands if it's not if it's not from if it's not from here someone didn't get paid enough to make it not if it's

fair trade but who's that's what they're oh they're just like a handful of people there that are getting paid like living wages well i think there's like a there's like a certification process for like certain roasteries that like if they choose to meet then they are marked as fair trade i think that's what that means right i have no idea whenever i whenever i hear fair trade and it's from like rwanda or somewhere like that it's like i don't think fair trade over there just means they're like they're they're not facing death on like a daily basis fair trade i think it's like i think that's like a company but like a like a certification yeah of course but like they're not making like 15 an hour okay yeah well i mean people in the u.s don't even that's not

even minimum wage here in california i think it's 20 oh in california it is but like in south carolina it's 725 is that real yeah i think in maine it's 20 as well well yeah most a lot of like the southern states don't even have state ones and the federal one is 725 how do they live i mean a lot it's not that many places actually pay 725 but there are some people who just can't literally can't afford to live it's fucked up yeah you have to have two jobs my dad just hired one of my high school friends oh yeah and it was off of my like he called me he's like he's like what's uh what's this guy all about because he knew him from when we were like he's like a welder right yeah so he's like a he's a welder but he might add i think wants him to maybe move into

like like he thinks that he has the tools to in a couple years i guess move into the office or something which a lot of these guys like don't want to do they just want to weld yeah and uh and now i feel so much pressure because i was like oh he's the best he's the greatest guy ever he's like the hardest worker and i'm like what if he just did what if i mean because i've got i think you've got to put yourself out there for your boy 100 but uh the only time we've ever worked together we were like the two biggest fuck-ups at that place i worked at a you didn't well did you no i worked in that shop but they you need like a certificate uh certificate or something i could only punch holes so i worked a machine you were a professional hole punch i mean

i wasn't i wasn't pro but i didn't go i was an amateur basically they would hand me these giant bars of steel on like a crane and i would put it under this machine with a pedal and you put in like whatever peg they need and you line it up with the dot and then you press it and on my first day jeff who's the foreman was like all right there's only one thing you need to know about this do not get your finger caught in it because it the only way i can go back up is if it goes all the way down so if you get your finger cut you would have to go all the way down to go through your finger and then do it and on the first day me and my sister's boyfriend worked there at the same time and we were like joking around whatever and i'm wearing these big gloves

and thank god they're a couple sizes too big but i just got my glove stuck in it and uh but it missed my finger by like a lot and so i looked at cam and i was like all right i gotta go all the way down and it just punched a hole in the glove and then i'm asking jeff a question about like how to do something and there's like clearly like the exact size hole of the thing that i'm punching he's like did you punch through your glove and i was like yeah we got distracted scary oh my god that's terrifying they started letting us operate the crane too and like these like like steel beams like the length of this room like way too big and you're supposed to like have it high enough that like anyone can see it yeah but it was just easier if you kind of did it at like ankle height

because then it can't like sway that much whatever you can kind of keep your hand on it and i just took a guy's feet out from under him and uh yeah they stopped letting me use the well how did you get behind so much heavy machinery was this in high school this was uh between my senior year of high school and my freshman year of college oh man my dad uh didn't think that we were very hard-nosed so he's like you're doing a summer in the in the shop well it clearly worked yeah now yeah i'm i have a pretty blue collar job now but i i got out of it by my girlfriend at the time got mono and i made her give me mono so i couldn't work and my dad my dad knew exactly what happened why i'm surprised you weren't fired after that

debacle yeah yeah i think we were just they were like what are you gonna do kill someone yeah what's hey what's the worst that happened we the that summer like everyone did you guys have one where everyone got mono like at the same time no i've never had it i've never had mono um so my girlfriend got it and then my best friend got it at the same time and we were like sketchy there's no way there's no way they were hooking up but like because he it was that it was like oh i see yeah it was my friend who was terrified of women so it was like yeah okay it's clearly not it's clearly a coincidence but how did they were the only two people in town that got it and then i got it after and a lot of with your friend a lot of

questions well i got it from i got it from my girlfriend at the time i would go over how do you know you didn't get it from the guys scared of girls i could have we i mean all of us were sharing everything so it could have been anyone your bodies but i went to the hospital and i made the the guy was like yeah you probably shouldn't work for like two weeks and then i told my dad it was the rest of the summer you went to the hospital for it you have to go to like get the test whatever and uh because i think your appendix or something can like burst it's really bad it could turn into stereo if you don't go to the dock um yeah yeah i'm on fire well i the reason that the reason i knew i had it we were we were at uh sketchy phil's lake house and uh i fell

asleep on the dock and i woke up 24 hours later oh my god yeah i fully passed out and then i was like i'm sleepier than usual 24 hours nap sounds awesome nobody came and checked on there's like he's having a killer afternoon and then i slept they were like he's maybe dead i think hour 20 i'm like he might he might be dead i even if like i feel a pulse i'm like i 20 hours in you wake him up right that's insane we uh on it you're on like a wooden dock outdoors i was like in like one of the like chairs yeah i was on one of these guys yeah in a in a like kind of reclined beach chair got it like maybe like sort of in this well this one's got like a sort of a yeah tropical vibe the cabana vibe oh asian vibe yes yeah third time's the charm um yeah i would

always fall asleep in like the like we had if we were day drinking i would just like fall asleep in like a strange position my friend harper's mom took a picture of me one time fun uh it looks like you know when like peter like someone dies in family guy and they like their limbs are all out like yeah i was kind of in that position and i was getting really fried on one side like sunburned and she came out and put sunscreen on me and then rolled me to the other side so i got like an even tan that's funny yeah that's sweet of her yeah she's a lovely lady we should get her on the pot yeah we should start getting parents on here we should get more parents on this pod have we ever had a parent yeah we just had one creed was a parent oh wait true is a parent that

already came out yeah creed already came out from the office um the their dad sent me a really creed's dad no the the family we were just talking about um i ain't much of it dude i was playing among us last night oh i forgot about that yeah we all downloaded it and we're just like sitting on the couch playing among us we used to go and just an hour it was awesome uh going in a queue we'd find like the youngest kid in the among us lobby and just accuse him of being the imposter every time yeah they get so mad yeah we were we we when you have three of us in the same room in a game you have like a lot of power like the other people don't really know about so we were making some reckless decisions uh but i did win as the

imposter which i was pretty proud of how do you target the youngest person yeah you forgot their voice like there's like proximity chat like voice it was like if you played on the xbox they could be like no no that's awesome like i saw ryan venting and he's like no you were you were the one doing it we used to make our names like charlie d'amelio just to like make people think we're charlie d'amelio there you go how'd that work out really good i made a lot of money off of it i'm rich from being what's she up to is she still like around yeah well her and dixie made a some brand together i feel like that's what they gotta do when they're falling off you just like make a clothing brand or something is it working i don't know oh are they new balance

no that that was one thing for them right they start new balance i don't know no what are they what is their company i don't know i want to buy some we can't this is the episode of like no research we got this we got the best book of all time as our coffee table book jerry brought this oh i love it body slams in your face insults from the world of pro wrestling if i read a couple i could read you a body slam or two let's hear it where'd he get it we have two things on our coffee table this and a playboy from 1950 i still haven't gotten rid of my nudie mags i need to figure out a place to dispose of those i could take them off your hands uh okay if brains were chocolate al snows wouldn't fit an m&m i mean that's pretty good oh you know we were talking

about jabroni last episode yeah that's a w the rock started jabroni it's like someone commented that right yeah uh what was that again there's a really good one uh we were talking about calling bill jabronis oh because someone wrote it and said that right he makes coffee nervous the only time vader sees 90210 is when he gets on the scale nice that guy eats off of satellite dishes he hits you so hard you wake up and your clothes are out of style that's something my dad would say this is awesome got hit so hard my clothes were out of style when i woke up were your were your parents ever like uh did ever tell you like fighting stories no no yeah neither wait why professional just like every dad if you like get a couple beers

in them wants to tell you about like how how tough their their crew was back in the day i don't think my dad had a tough crew or at least i don't know about this story my my dad used to him and his cousin bobby and tuami would go up to maine every summer and they used to do some of the most like they have these stories that just sound insane but they had a there was like a mini golf course right by their house have i told this story i know the mini golf course no but i haven't heard the store not pirates cove like this is like an old it's like now a convenience store it's like it doesn't exist how small was this yeah i don't know they always they always like the mini golf is where like moby dicks used to be or something which is just like a variety store anyway there

was a mini golf course and i guess there was a hole where like the ball would like go in you know those things were like go in some box and then like come out on the other side i guess they could fit in the box and so they would go in there and bring balls and then someone's ball would come and they would change it out with a different color so a ball would go in one color and come out a different color and they'd or they would just snatch the balls and then people would stick their clubs up there and start like whacking them and grab the club kind of sounded very fun that's hilarious and then i think there's just oh my god the the seagull that this one they decided they want to catch a i don't know if i i don't think i've told this but uh they decided they

wanted to catch a seagull and so they like put some like they created like a big thing out of string with like a like they ran it through like a loop at the end kind of thing and uh put some like bread in there and we're like the plan was like pull it tight when the seagull came down and try to grab by the leg and like my dad describes he's like like we had this whole plan but like obviously no one ever thought it was gonna work and then it immediately worked and so they have a seagull on a ball of string that's now trying to fly away and they have it like a kite yeah and uh they had to like reel it in as far as they could and cut it but it's kind of fucked up honestly we did that with a hornet once uh there was a like a big hornet that made

its way into the have you ever talked about the jack shack yeah in my backyard we used to hang out in this little shack called the jack shack yeah and there was a hornet that made its way into the loft what'd you say sounds like a place you'd crack your coconut yeah i was cracking my coconut left and right in there and uh we found there was this hornet so we put bigo one of my buddies in all this like swimming gear so that he couldn't get stung and we sent him up there with a mason jar to like cat catch it and he got it and then we were like what do we do with it now and my friend was like if you put them in the freezer they go to sleep no no you put in the freezer just for a little bit to they go to sleep forever they go to sleep for like five minutes and you have

five minutes to tie a string around its thorax and then you have a bee on a leash it's pardon it's what it's thorax what is that i think it's the yeah yeah it's in between the it's kind of like their abdomen right yep yeah yeah it's it's that little thin part between the the hump on the back and their body okay so you tie a string around it and then you have a bee on the leash and my dad walked in on us tying a string around a hornet in the kitchen he's like what are you guys doing we're like we're putting this bee on a leash and he was like okay all right so we went outside and what we didn't realize is that like the bee can't get away but it can just come right back at you yeah yeah and so the second it woke up we had to be on a leash

for like five seconds but then it realized who is its master and it just turned around and started stinging him and then we let it go and so now there's some bee out there with like a really long string on it maybe you'll meet up with the seagull with a string yeah they're in the same 15 minute area so what did the timing look like for when you woke back up like did you did you have to like quickly get the b yeah no you have that you have it on the strip we put it on a dominoes box and we had the string on it and then we just sat there as a waiting game and so you sat there and you wait for it to like kind of wake up and get its facilities back that's very strange that you can freeze it and it just puts it to sleep yep that's because i don't think that would

work for us uh no i mean it would yeah you could you could get a guy to go to sleep it brings its core temperature down enough to for it to go to sleep someone like wheeled your bed into like a walk-in freezer you wake up with a rope around your waist yeah there's some giant bee with you on a string giant bee yeah a regular size hornet with me on a string oh my god how are you holding on to me oh that should be a horror movie hornet well don't spoil that's one of my horror movies it doesn't exist are you doing that today no oh you don't even know what we're doing today i don't you guys don't tell me anything these days i know it's just we don't want to overwhelm you no i know thank you we don't want to overwhelm you what else is going on um well are you really comfortable

because we're in your house yeah i feel great right now i'm a little hungry so am i i didn't eat anything i didn't eat breakfast so that's i think i'm gonna try that water fast again you remember when i did that what was it just like you didn't eat for a day or something i didn't i made i think i made it two and a half days without eating yeah just water it sounds horrible yeah it was not fun who was it that guy that didn't eat that actor that didn't eat for like 60 days um christian bale no um oh david blaine some guy didn't eat for so long and he's a really skinny pete davidson no but he like gained all the way back i don't know um the the i don't know it's not even worth it no no no we're not gonna move on until we i've gotten over my

i've gotten over my uh having to snack when i'm high now i can get high without snacking it's a big development big for me all right should we road should we road map i don't know why we feel like awkward around each other right now no it's not awkward i feel like lauren's making me a little uncomfortable wait why yeah you're kind of you're your aura today yeah your vibe's off i'm kidding i'm joking i'm fucking with you bro today my family's flying in tonight and i'm going to santa barbara tomorrow for a wedding oh congratulations not mine oh okay i'm getting married that'd be fun though i was uh lauren was texting me the other day and uh i was pretty drunk and oh great on alcohol

yeah i was high on alcohol and lauren and troy were going to a wedding oh yeah and he had to go shopping and for some reason i felt like i felt like he needed to just go i was like mad he wouldn't just go to my closet and take my clothes wait yeah we didn't even acknowledge and i was just like kind of berating her to just take him to my house and go shopping what were you gonna give him i wanted him to wear these green linen she wanted him to in linen so i was like go to my closet i have a linen outfit that he could wear were you not at home no i was in detroit he's like just go to my house go to my house get my green my green linen pants there's a white linen shirt yeah because i sent him a photo of stuff he was trying on and he goes he's

way too he's way too attractive for the standard look okay he was going he was going dark he was going dark khakis in a blue shirt he didn't end up buying that shirt he bought a lighter shirt it looks good he had a good fit guys we want to take a quick moment to talk about a new sponsor of the pod lucy lucy is intelligent nicotine for adults designed by scientists to deliver the most satisfying nicotine experience and always tobacco free whether you use nicotine to enhance focus boost your energy or relax there is a lucy for you they offer products from hydrating breakers to pouches to lozenges to gum with individual servings ranging from four milligrams to 12 milligrams ensuring satisfaction for even the most demanding nicotine routines jack rusty if i may

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them and let me tell you as a potter fan it's it's making my shower routine a little bit more fun guys give everymanjack a shot today and go to everymanjack.com and use code playdate at checkout for 25 off your first order that's everymanjack.com code playdate at checkout for 25 off your first order let's get back into the episode i found this thing that my friend's dad sent me he missed my birthday yeah so he sent me like a an apology thing and you know you can like become a bitmoji or you can become an emoji became a poop emoji and he sent me this holy shit i missed someone's birthday who's a favorite of mine whoa hope i'm not in trouble happy birthday to jack that's it man that's all you get shit man i'm sorry

sorry i'm being such a shit happy birthday oh oh my god that is he just said that no no he said it like a couple days later but i was just it popped up on my record he sends it now yeah bro it's not even close months later i got in i got in some steamy hot water oh with uh no my friend carolina you know of course it was her birthday on friday i texted her i went to text her at 7 a.m saturday so admittedly i was late i missed her birthday i realized that i was like oh shit went to text her 7 a.m saturday she texted me at 12 15 on like 15 minutes after her birthday ended and said dead to me and so when i went to text her happy birthday seven hours late there was already texted dead to me so then it made it look like i was just responding because she had sent it

i got how's she doing and she's mad at me so i don't even know how old she turned 24 jesus i know they get so old so quick they do they grow up fast they grow up fast i love her lauren's almost 20 um seven seven 30 no i think you're 30 you look 30 that's why i thought no i don't say that sure not that that's bad 30 year olds are beautiful yeah whoa big shot at binder they're coming after 30 year olds how old is binder 30 no binders 26 she just turned 26 i saw binder last night oh no on main street she was out and about i was doing trivia yeah we got fourth place guess who gets a prize the top three fourth place have you ever won no uh what are the prizes i think you just get kombucha but i mean sounds like a punishment

i hate kombucha i like um the birthday thing reminds me my first week at friday beers it was edge's birthday yeah and uh liam texted me that edge was turning 50 and uh and i responded to him like damn that's crazy is he actually 50 like that's wild and Liam took a screenshot and sent it to Edge and then Edge just like ripped me in the company group chat for thinking he was 50

that's hysterical Edge and I had a fun weekend together in Michigan we got twisted off the the devil's reserve we were handing out devil's reserve shots and people don't trust you to take your shot

unless you take it with them And so I had to take a bunch back to back to back. And I was feeling good. I was feeling loose. Big BC win. Huge BC win. 3-1. We're in this weird schedule of pre-recording,

but hopefully we'll be 4-1 by the time you listen to this. Yeah. We just played Michigan State. Who do we have Saturday? Western Kentucky. WKU is going to be a bloodbath. Yeah. Not feeling good.

Not feeling... Not... I think we're going to win. Yeah. so i heard i heard the our plan of turning venice beach bar into the key bar was working oh my god operation turned venice beach bar into the bc bar is firing on all the flags flag is still up is it held up by the tape or did they put masking tape we gotta we gotta we gotta reinforce it but we have we hung this flag up a month ago now and they just

let it up there it's like a very focal point of the bar it makes it seem like the owner went there yeah and then yesterday we had like or on saturday we had like 10 people that were like bc people and that what i realized is like 10 people at a bar all rooting for one kind of obscure team that no one really has a reason to dislike kind of turns the whole crowd so everyone there just was kind of in on it and everyone was like doing the chants with us it was rocking i posted a picture of liam and i in michigan jerseys at the game fucked up and uh i've never received more hate yeah i didn't realize people hated michigan well they're cheaters they cheated to a national championship they haven't they are caught cheating and won a national championship that year

yeah i mean honestly i just feel bad for them like they have such a big asterisk next to their biggest achievement in the last at the at the bar will and i were at in ann arbor jj mccarthy who was the quarterback last year gave them a jersey to hang up and he wrote uh like stay electric or something or something that like hinted at that he came there and like partied and i had never thought about that those guys were able to in my head they weren't able to go to the bars because they were too big i saw aj dylan at the bars a few times in college there we go what was b what was the bc bar scene like isn't boston like ridiculously strict with fakes yeah yeah i mean yeah but like once you're 21 the bc bar scene is horrible it's two bars and one like yeah it's just

not good and one like the the main bar is this bar the circle which i bartended at and i have a lot of love for the people who own that place but the basement smells like farts and like and it's like everyone knows it but they have us in such a chokehold because it's like the only bar right by campus that you can like walk to so it's just they're just like yeah the basement smells like farts and guess what you're still gonna come here like they they have like you know what i mean which is like that's when you're in a bad spot is when they know that they're gonna get you no matter what yeah so they have no incentive to like keep up any standards everyone uh everyone on my plane yesterday was farting everyone uh it was i might take a plane down and they were

they were yeah changes the pressure air pressure uh there was there was constantly new smelling farts so that's why i'm saying everyone because it wasn't like one guy yeah unless he'd eaten a bunch of different meals yeah the woman next to me was wearing this like very flowy long sundress yeah and we hadn't talked the entire flight and then when the plane landed she tapped me on the shoulder and said like uh hey before i get up can you just make sure there's nothing on the back of my dress and i was like okay and she stood up and did like a fashion show like twirl and was like spreading the dress and i felt like i was just looking at her butt and then i was like it's looking good and she said awesome would you like a piece of gum and i said yes and she put one in

her hand and then when she went to there were the icebreaker like cube things yeah like 30 of them flew out but they were already in my hand and so i just kept it there being like maybe she'll grab some of them back and she didn't and so i just took one and put the rest in my pocket all right should we road map it up oh it's 11 11 everyone make a wish everyone make a wish i'm wish something like a hot a hot trick appears in the room i know it's clear what you wish for yeah scott's pants fly off i wish there already is a hot chick in the room bang well done all right we have a fantastic oh wait what episode is it 58 you were trying to get us fired yeah is it 57 uh i wish for a good harvest by the way so that's for you middle america you can't share

oh fuck i wish for bad harvest oh maybe that's a loophole yeah you can tell them that you wish for the opposite and then say it out loud because then it won't come true right yeah because then that what they say is it won't come yeah who's a famous 57 year old oh episode 57 no number 57 that's how we do it actually athlete 57 i'm about to pull one out that is going to send you guys into orbit chris pronger what sport is that why does that matter i don't know i looked up athletes that were in 50 no no just chris pronger number oh he's not gonna show up under athletes he is chris pronger doesn't even like have a number what he's one of those guys that have a number No, he's 44.

It's like an Egyptian symbol. 44? Bullshit. You gotta get him on now. Louis Dacus on JV football. From Boy Genius? No, from my high school. All right.

What? From your high school? That's cheating. Fantastic episode for you guys today. We are going to do your pitches followed by our pitches. And then we are going to do, are we going to do This Guy Rocks? If you guys want to. I mean, we can still show them and then I can put them up on the screen after.

we're gonna do this guy rocks followed by teach me something and then will and i are gonna do game shows that don't exist and rules in our fantasy football leagues yep lauren let's hear some pitches that was a great roadmap wasn't it boys all right oh my roommate jerry just walked in jerry jerry's back from the gym jerry's back from the gym and he's looking like he just went to the gym too all right first bird moment first pitch is from maggie kuiper maggie kuiper says what's up lauren and the troublemakers what's the worst part about having a movie night with your friend slash love interest uh you can't decide what you want to watch you can't uh oh the if it's the love

interest the trying to figure out when in the movie is an acceptable time to make a move you're great you're you're you are so hard you can't move the blanket okay uh sure and then wait wait i want to do one for the love interest too for the love interest you're so you're so hard the blanket snacks you're so hard the blanket's not covering any of your body anymore yeah you have to put two pillows you have to stack two pillows like jack and the beanstalk oh that reminds me the first the first time i ever went on a uh when i was in like eighth grade i was going to hang out with this girl and i was scared i was going to get a boner so i wore two pairs of spandex it's kind of awesome that's funny wait no they're not jacking what's the one with the p

princess and the p princess and the p like she stacks all the beds and you can still feel the p or something yeah yeah yeah okay well maggie says she like peed the bed no no like a p e a oh wait no i want to break this down what is that so what's the story of that she's oh put a hundred bed mattresses on top of a pea and then she could still feel the pea why didn't she just take out what's the lesson i'm looking it up it's about a princess who is tested to become the wife of a lonely prince in the story the prince travels the okay this is fake oh oh oh here we go the p symbolizes a sensitivity fanfic the p symbolizes a sensitivity to the needs of others it represents the work that we have to do yeah boring so yeah for me it was like yeah like you stack a bunch

of pills but it's like it's still my like yeah yep okay still hard maggie you the first thing you said um she says that's right picking a movie that all parties actually want to watch yes introducing tinder for movies each member at the movie night logs onto the app and then swipes right or left on movies until everyone matches on an agreed upon film it's anonymous so everyone can be honest without feeling shame about which movies they like or dislike you can pre-select preferred genres streaming platforms etc this app will work on everyone except will who has apparently never seen a movie in his life p.s i'm hey can you tell maggie kuiper to chill out yeah that i have a i have a fucking life and feelings okay wait i'm sorry she says p.s i met

you guys last year at the university of wisconsin when i was in the cheese curd eating contest with rusty i love the pod oh i remember that that's great uh i hate to burst maggie's old eating contest with rusty were you there we were both there yeah but i'm i'm like i'm more memorable it's not well that guy hercules at the trees care reading contest the hercules guy the guy won yeah tim yeah yeah we're still butts that guy rules uh what was his name tim tom timmy tim shea yeah i think i still follow him on instagram but uh he did junk removal all summer oh no he's posting about it yeah but uh i'd let him this app already exists unfortunately you'd let him what remove my junk okay this app

already exists unfortunately oh it's us yeah there's a thing where you and another person log on you swipe until you both agree upon a movie and then it says that's the movie you're watching oh i didn't know that was the thing but maggie we love you yeah and i have seen some movies so i've seen um final destination three so now i want to go watch one of those yeah they're kind of fun i remember them being really cheesy though super like but it's kind of like that's like why yeah yeah it's like a fun it's like fun to watch with like a group where everyone's like yeah yeah yeah all right thank you margaret thanks margaret all right next pitch is from parker gonit paca says hi lolo wilco and rusty toothbrush i like wilco i'm just don't cry you

know what the worst part of calling literally any company is uh walking having to talk they a lot of times they aren't accurate in english he says it is being put on hold they're trying to get better by putting a callback option in but it never works well so my pitch is an app or something that connects with the phone call or maybe the company uses it for their hold but the app connects to your spotify if you use apple music that's too bad and you can play your own playlist music or playdate pods while on hold when they actually connect you to a person the music stops just like regular hold music that's a great idea i love that i like it that is a great idea because it's like no one wants to listen to like and sometimes i'll just hang up because i'm

like oh i'm sick of this yes agreed right agreed that's genius i like it like when it's clear they're just playing music like through the phone like it's like static like yeah that's the other thing it never it's like good audio my buddy jackson has a voicemail he went into garage man and made a beat and it goes bong kong kong kong kong kong kong kong kong i'll call you back that's awesome i feel like it should be good quality i mean like yeah it's good quality when we call people why does it sound like shit i think it's a way of like keeping us docile like for the government to like keep us like hopefully it doesn't pick up yeah i'm gonna be pissed if he answers i should make my own voicemail don't pick up jackson don't pick up i think nobody answers

these days I'll call you back he's like 12 wait I love that yeah I was just calling you to show someone your voicemail thank you for not picking up oh yeah I got you

alright later brother that's gotta feel good he does sound so young that's cute but also I'll call you back even the music sounds like super distorted yeah because he was holding his like iphone 4 up to okay we made this when we were in like fourth or fifth grade i think or sixth grade um all right

should we hear another one of those last pitch yeah two pitches i have a pitch yeah yeah what is it i forget i'm really good sometimes i think of great pitches and i need to write them down because they slip my brain like 10 seconds after i think of them yeah you should write them i should so i can participate you're gonna have to run the gauntlet if bc keeps this up oh yeah that's true bc hasn't lost a game in acc play yet so what was that other game that they lost is that just like a regular that was an sec they lost to mizzou who was number six i mean they've only won one game in acc play too so it's pretty up in the air is wku sec no they're western kentucky they're not atlantic atlantic 10 it was not a power five i thought they were like the shittiest

team in the sec western kentucky like the red wku yeah i thought they were in the sec i thought they were like the worst team in this or they like a10 atlantic something they're like like mountain conference nice what okay uh oh here's an idea i call it the side view mirror uh it lets you see it lets you know when you can merge into traffic yeah no when if you want to merge into traffic no no like you ever pull up at the light and you like go to look over at the person next to you and then they're also looking at you and then it's just like you know what i mean i feel like that always happens especially like if i'm like you know playing music or feeling good i'm like you know i think i look cool i'm like maybe this is like you know the love of my

life like i'm gonna go see if she's like wow that guy looks cool and then i make i kind of like an old lady and it's just weird yeah so this side view mirror is a little mirror you know bottom corner of your window thing it's pointing out and it just shows you what the person next to you looks like so if they look really chill you can start doing like chill stuff nice but if they look like lame then you can just let your freak out yeah you know i've always wondered why because you feel cool when your windows are down you're playing music yeah but when someone else is doing it's clear it's not cool why do you think that we think it's cool i think music just makes the soul feel cool and wind music and wind are both things that make you feel cool it's like sometimes i get

embarrassed like when i pull up to a light and i have music playing really loud i always turn it down i want it yeah and then back up once i start driving yeah i was like if you're going on abbott kinney yeah and it's like oh i'm stuck in traffic yeah yeah yeah i was at a stoplight and i was playing my music feeling good and i looked over and the guy was laughing at me really yeah well he's a loser no i looked i probably look like a douchebag i was listening to future oh yeah from pakistan what up i'm gonna go uh on a road trip in a few weeks i'm pretty excited where are you going flying to charlotte and i'm renting a car and i'm driving to cincinnati why i'm gonna go see some friends along the way make a little event what's in cincinnati my grandmother's burial

you fucking asshole it's every week dude it's every week yeah no we have to we have to do like or like yeah like are you gonna give a speech uh no i'm not planning to or i i think there might i think afterwards we're doing like a luncheon thing where everyone's gonna like share stories yeah but this might uh be a horrible thing to say but do you guys ever uh think about like how killer your speech is going to be at like someone you love's funeral you're like i'm gonna knock this out no i think i think about that it's not sad i think about that i've already got yours lined up but it feels like narcissistic to be like i'm gonna make this moment about how absolutely but i think that's normal like everyone has had those thoughts i think if you if you died

in like a fiery explosion or something i could give an awesome what is that you wrote something down oh yeah one time i was really drunk and i kept telling will at his funeral i'm gonna say most people uh most people run away from life will denellan runs at it and he was like i i was like dude i'm gonna say this at your funeral i guess i know i know that's funny i uh i gave a or we already watched this i think but i i gave a in my public speaking class i gave a fake funeral for a dog did i ever show you that no it was a fake dog or it was a fake dog that i made up you guys want to watch it who's that scott no yeah oh nice should we have them come say hi yeah you want some come say hi actually i don't want to show this video but i knocked it out of the park he's

acting weird he ran oh there he is hey hey oh that's my roommate scott i love scott now but i was i was nervous oh yeah you were kind of talking shit last week yes i don't like i don't like how much of my will time he's taking that's will clue he's very excited that he's around and now will is another guy in house and i can't compete with a guy who's in house yeah he's in house i got him main house what was your tie he's tied for the lead yeah i almost called him ty actually when i got here i was like really him up in my brains don't call him have you met tyler yeah lovely i was a little drunk but he was nice on alcohol well what is up with you guys all right who wants to hear my pitch me i do um i feel like i feel like the hardest part about trying to eat healthier

is like you should frame this as it's a pitch you gotta say what's the hardest part okay what's what guys what's the what's the hardest part about trying to eat healthier uh that it tastes worse you don't want to cook it like there's that's actually the best answer that's the cooking thing yeah produce goes bad quicker uh i just don't know what i don't know we even know where to start like i don't know what to make don't know what to do yeah like i don't have a lot of time so i'm thinking this app you plug in like okay here are the activities that i'm doing today here's where i'm gonna be and it's like okay go to this place order this order this at this place make this at home and it just like tells you what to do so you don't have to like think about it

why are you making that this is your exact pitch from last episode really yeah that you put in all the things you have to do for a day no no no that was different that was it that was for activities yeah yeah this is this is it's just that but healthy meals it's the exact picture of last episode i thought about it on the way here i did it kind of mailed it in but um i would like that though it would it knows where you're gonna be it says here are things that you can order also like if you're trying to eat healthier but all your friends want to go somewhere now you're looking at the menu and you're like trying to figure out what's healthy it'll just be like these things on the menu will keep you on your diet or whatever yeah i've been honestly i do relate and that's

i've been like no free ads but i've been using like a meal service yeah well don't you have a deal with them now no i'm trying to get one oh word we went to this place called zingerman's uh yesterday you went have you been i went on friday okay i went to zingerman's it takes an hour and a half to get your freaking sandwich it's insane because every every or i don't want to speak for all of them our waitress you know when the waitress is trying to be like cool and funny and it's like a conversation every time they come to the table that's all good and fun but if you keep making mistakes it becomes a lot less funny each time yeah so like she she just forgot to put in our orders which seems like rule number one as a waitress she forgot a

bunch of drinks uh and then in between each fuck up is telling us like her life story and we were like this would be fun if you were like knocking it out of the park service wise yeah but it was like a whole thing each time she wanted to have like a full conversation every time she came over and it was yeah did skylar like the sides he didn't go uh it was like it was good i had i had a knocked out of the park sandwich there fried chicken no i got a um it was like a grilled chicken pesto sun-dried tomato mozzarella type place it's in michigan ann arbor it's like a legendary but when i went on it was on a friday and it i ordered a sandwich and they said it was gonna take 95 minutes and it did so i just left and like went explored for an hour and a half

oh my god i was ready that's bizarre yeah i've never had anything so is it like a walk-up and you order you know it's sit down oh i think i think it's probably different were you the one in ann arbor i don't think so i don't think i could oh you were in in detroit yeah okay like the original one i think is in ann arbor and that's like you walk in you order at a counter and then she kept bringing us samples too of sandwiches of food and it was like this is great but i would love to just eat we can't we had to go to the airport after it was like yeah we're not we don't want to do the whole shebang st costco right yeah right yep that costco jake i saw a video of uh of big aj that one of the costco guys in a chick-fil-a

i hate that guy i mean it hadn't occurred to me that like you know they're yelling in every video yeah they're just disturbing everyone else's lunch these people were just eating at chick-fil-a and he's in the background being like the grilled chicken sandwich gets a big boom yeah do you see him is this the son is this the kid no that was the dad i hate i haven't watched the video but the risler's cool the other two gave me the weird vibes i saw a tweet about them that was like me and my wife it was the it was big aj big justice and the risler yeah and the risers holding a chicken bake and like going to town on it and it said me and my wife after giving our uh our dog a new treat all right guys quick shout out to our partner fireball fireball is the perfect shot for

game day whether you're grabbing some of those sneaky little shooters before going into the stadium or going big with the fireball keg for your party whether it's a pre-game shot in the tailgate lot or a celebratory touchdown shot at the bar no matter the method fireball is guaranteed to ignite your game day while so many things make football great we can all agree that nothing beats crushing your rival there's absolutely no better feeling as an athlete or a fan this season fireball whiskey wants to provide an extra spark to ignite football rivalries all season long there is nothing i love more than taking a little fireball shot after a lewis bond 50 yard dot to beat michigan state lauren i would be sweating because if you guys remember correctly we made a bet with

lauren at the beginning of the season that if bc wins the acc lauren has to run the full playdate gauntlet and if bc does not win the acc we have to buy her a cake with her face on it and boston college football just keeps looking better every week beat michigan state by the time you listen to this we'll have just beaten western kentucky and we're going to cruise through the acc so i'd be sweating if i were you and i will be taking a little fireball shot every time we win one of these big games fireballs iconic cinnamon flavor tastes fire and goes down easy making it the ultimate crowd pleaser go pick up some from your local liquor store and join us in drinking fireball during our game days this season let's get back into the episode all right should we do this guy

rocks yeah i'll just show it to you okay so there's this restaurant in maine well you might have gone there it's called day's hearts or dies hearts or something it's like a famous okay diner whatever we would stop there on the way to like golf tournaments and stuff it was awesome and they're trying to film a commercial for it with their like regulars so there's this elderly couple that comes in all the time and they were like who better to who better to do the commercial than people that like genuinely love the food and they're in here all the time and what they didn't realize is like people from northern maine probably not the greatest actors right this might be their first time in showbiz and the line that the guy is supposed to say he's describing a

chicken pot pie he's supposed to say baked in a buttery flaky crust okay seems oh yeah seems simple enough let's let's uh let's watch him try and fit an uber yeah that's veteran let's watch him try and figure it out bacon a buttery crust it's close hey bacon a buttery flavored crusher i love this one baked in a buttery flavored crusher uh crust yeah baked in a buttery flaky crust. Baked in a buttery, flaky crust. Here we go. Baked in a buttery, crispy

crust. Flaky. I like flaky all again. See, it's true they have that cookout up there. Baked in a buttery, baked in a buttery, crispy crust. Oh my God.

Is that cool? Flaky. I thought I said flaky. I'm okay. baked in a buttery flaky crust you should have had me do that oh yeah she does that good baked in a buttery crispy

crust he's going back to crispy crispy okay damn flaky baked in a buttery flaky flaky

crust did I screw up again? Yes, she did. I did? Baked in a buttery flaky crust. Baked in a baked... You can't even do that. Baked in a buttery crispy flake.

I love that video. That's been a nightmare to shoot. She goes, Dan, flaky. It's great that when it finally gets to her she fucks up Thank you Baked in a buttery crispy flake This is I believe on 60 Minutes 60 Minutes Australia

Oh they always have the best stuff Because there's like horrible things happening Have you heard about foreign accent syndrome No This is all pog Is that like what that musician had Where he was pretending to be us Battery charger

Sarah Colwell from Plymouth In England, it's a dead-set Pom, who now sounds like she's from Shanghai. It wasn't until I was in the ambulance on the way to the hospital, she actually said, are you aware of the way you're speaking? And I said, oh, I sound like I have a slur. And she said, no, you sound like you can work at a Chinese restaurant. Cindy Hastings is fourth-generation Australian. She's never been to Europe, but you'd swear she was born there,

such is her thick Eastern European accent. an accent where do you think she is from i would say probably um croatia or okay it's interesting that you you perceive it that way because i'm actually australian oh okay i'm born in sydney and australia all my life oh wow another english woman kay russell sounds like she's just flown in from parrot okay to the locals here in your village except you as anyway as so she's just faking all these accents no up and they just have it no those are all different people that have all been they like got in traumatic accidents and when they woke up they talk like they're from there was that guy that first lady was english that was talking with an asian accent oh my gosh

yeah there was that guy that got hit like by like a bus or something and he was in a coma and when he woke up he spoke fluent russian really well but like i don't believe yeah i don't buy that at all it doesn't make any sense like that at least makes sense like you knew the accent yeah yep this guy claims that he woke up maybe he was in a russian hospital or something but there there are guys that there's the guy that got hit uh he got hit in like a mugging and he woke up he understood like triangularity like he like started seeing patterns in the universe and he was like not good at math until he got hit in the head with this and he understood it i read about a guy who got hit by a bus and then everyone didn't know about the beatles oh i just watched

that yesterday how did you know about that you watched that one i watched yesterday yesterday really yeah that's crazy i hate that movie oh it's not it's like it's a great story they just they the ed sheeran part makes me so infuriated wait why i like it's like like it's a fun premise and then it's like the way he gets famous is that ed sheeran is just driving and hears him on the radio and is like i'm gonna make that like there's no way like the beatles are great but like you hearing one your plot hole is ed sheeran wouldn't be listening to the radio and not everyone would forget about the beatles well no but obviously that's like an out there thing but then the rest of it should be normal like that's like you got one big out there thing and then the rest of it's

like like that that movie would be interesting in the context of like how people would actually react if this one crazy thing happened but then the way that he gets famous just being ed sheeran's driving along we're listening to the radio and he's like oh this guy's amazing i'm gonna sign him and make him famous is like he's never done that with anyone what happened to the beebs with no he was like posting videos on youtube and like putting and they were blowing up to like a big audience that's fair like they didn't even make it like plausible also here's a question like the beatles songs as a obviously the beatles were like you know one of the best bands of all time but like i don't even know if i would buy that like hearing one of those

songs on the radio today i'd be like holy shit yeah i think it's a context thing you would need yeah yep oh yesterday all right should we do teach me something ladies and gentlemen teach me something you know it you love it it did teach me something did you know that in medieval times uh there was a guy who it was it was not uncommon to use like random things for currency yeah they were like you know barter in different ways and one of the weirdest things that they would use were eels like if you could catch a bunch of eels for this guy a record survives showing someone once rented land for 26 275 eels oh my did they have that many at the disposal or was that like a futures contract he must have he must have had some sort of tank with all of those to be named

later yeah and uh what do you even do with those why would you want those uh play with them yeah you could play with them you could eat them you could i can't give them to local kids you could uh use them for shock therapy start a band oh here's a horrible thing uh when i was at the asylum they were showing it's like all the different like therapy things they would do on these people and uh they had pretty much no understanding of like what anything was so when someone was having seizures they thought they were like possessed or whatever yeah or just like insane and they would put them in this bathtub with like stuff holding them down so they couldn't get out and they would either make it ice cold or like scalding hot and they thought that would fix

them which one would you rather uh ice cold ice cold right it's like that's like hot these days yeah it was like pre pre joe rogan though it was pretty scary yeah yeah that doesn't sound fun that doesn't sound fun all right teach me something willie dude i was just reading about the amazon river you know sometimes of the year there are parts of the amazon river that are 25 miles in width oh my gosh no that's crazy yeah i didn't know that that's insanity that's like from here to downtown further yeah that's further than downtown probably as the crow flies probably further than downtown i'm curious um that's insane yeah and it used to flow the opposite direction oh and like the tectonic plates shifted and like the andes mountains formed and it like

was like and just like started going the other way that's bizarre is that crazy and there's fucking do you know there's dolphins that live in the amazon river i didn't yeah and sharks i don't believe that last one it's true there are freshwater sharks there are yeah or does the amazon connect to the ocean it connects to the ocean so there's solar well that doesn't make it saltwater it's a hybrid every river cross connects to the ocean for the most part like the mississippi river what about the anderskagen you've you ever done the anderskagen yet i don't know what that who that was in maine and uh my dad had this friend named snowboard and rick and uh all right and we were supposed to go on a canoeing trip with him the day doesn't sound like his area of expertise

yeah snowboard and rick was like this local at this place called mount abrams and we met him and he was like i think he's kind of like a stoner guy whatever and uh my dad was like yeah you want to come on this canoe trip with me and my kids tomorrow he's like yeah for sure and uh we i guess him and his buddies were shooting beer bottles off the canoe the night before with shotguns so they were just like a lot like hundreds of tiny little holes in it and he had tried to duct tape them up but him and my sister were in it and every like 45 feet they would have to beach it and dump all the water out and then get back in christ and then my mom and i saw snowboarding rick like 10 years later he's like he was skiing he was skiing and he was like

a completely like he had he had gotten his act together oh good for him i think also maybe back in the day my perception was like anyone who drinks and smokes he's automatically like a bum like i don't think he i think he was probably just like a normal like 30 year old guy yeah and uh i remember finding out one of my teachers in middle school smoked cigarettes and i uh it was a big deal and we were all gossiping about it yeah in your head you're like how do they have a job and then yeah and then like huge one of the other teachers like overheard us gossiping and she like pulls me aside and was like what he does is none of your fucking business and i was like that's actually true like it was kind of like a it was yeah knowing you're knowing your teachers

have lives outside of school terrifying terrifying we were at a bar we were at uh amigos you know amigos and uh in uh the old port it's like it's like kind of like a reunion of like oh is that place we went in portland surely i always go there shortly surely and uh yeah that was where i got i have been there that was where i got my lip split open that thing i was telling you oh yeah um but it's like a reunion of like everyone in the kind of portland area during the holidays you see people you haven't seen in like forever and i saw one of our favorite substitute teachers in there and uh we were all like pretty drunk and when we saw him for some reason it got like really sad you know when it was like because last time we saw him we were like children yeah and now it's like we're

all drinking together and it was kind of strange and it like looked like he maybe wasn't the happiest and we were like oh that's like a real bummer that these guys are like they have like real lives and now we're like kind of doing like i remember thinking like that guy's the man and now it's like we're just doing the same thing together yeah it is weird to conceptualize but yeah i feel like i like moved away from my childhood so i haven't like seen anyone as an adults so they can still like do you guys go out with your parents friends over the holidays no or sorry sorry your friends parents no uh not really one of my friends one of my like girlfriends dads would come out with us every once in a while and i was like this is fun for the first like

15 minutes and then i was like what are you doing yeah i'm not the biggest christmas eve yeah yeah like you got don't you have like presents to okay sorry i shouldn't spoil nothing forget i said anything yeah um all right lauren you get to pick would you like to do would you like will and i to do game shows that don't exist first or rules our fantasy football leagues have let's do game shows all right these are game shows that don't exist damn right they are all right this one is called fair shot okay contestants will compete in a variety of high stakes carnival games all right i'm talking about this is like the super bowl of pop a balloon win a prize toss a ring on the milk carton and you're thinking like whatever i've been to fairs people

suck at them this isn't like anyone can get in the fair shot these are people that are really good at them I want to see the best of the best at the basketball hoop that's rigged I want to see the best of the best at the guy shooting a little gun at a little target you know what I mean I want to see the go to skee ball yep I want to see the guy who can you know what I want to see a guy who can stop that light right on the thing you know the light that spings yeah things around I want to see the guy who can guess people's weight down to the ounce down to the ounce I want to see the guy that can ride a roller coaster without screaming or pissing I mean I these mythical people yeah yeah mythical people yeah i've never seen it it's true my life i haven't either have you guys seen

who's high no 10 contestants five of them are high and uh they go through a series of challenges right so they they're around a table snacks come out and then we you got to watch like a funny video yeah and each round they have to figure out they have to vote out one person who they think is high and the goal is to just act like you're not high and if a high person wins uh they all the high people split a million dollars holy shit yeah it's a high budget show big yeah i want to play uh crosswalk this is like a real like version of like uh like everybody like crossy road or something yep like you know kind of like frogger evolution uh so it's like a huge street but but it's combined with like a wipe out type stuff so it's like you have to make your way across six

lanes of traffic but there's like these like big balls and cushions come and flying and stuff and you got to know when to stop or go forward or they'll hit you into a pool and uh first one to make it across the street gets hot dogs for a year oh that's fun yeah like it uh i really like wheel of misfortune so similar to wheel of fortune there are dollar amounts on certain tiles but half of them are really bad punishments right so you could get a thousand dollars or you could land on the atomic wedgie uh tile you could and did pat say jack give it to you what sorry what or just who does the atomic wedgie mr t oh shit and uh there's a wet willy tile there's a shave your head tile there but like the dollar amounts are way higher so there's an incentive to actually

play the show i like that a lot thank you i would like the atomic wedgie one but i would like it to be that whatever that lady's name is pat's ajax wife i want her to do who is that um vanna vanna white vanna white right anyone yep is it yes are you sure yes all right uh like a surgeon okay there's in b-52 flying above us right now we're doing this from pearl harbor i'm surprised that's the first noise that we've had i feel like it's been very quiet now we have a dog scott made a big ruckus earlier oh yeah okay this is like a surgeon like a surgeon is a game where someone has there's five surgeons that come in to operate on a contestant one of them is not medically qualified at all and they begin conducting uh invasive surgery and they have to try to figure

out who the fake surgeon is before it goes horribly wrong i love that um i don't have a name for this one but it's blind dating right so there is a player on one side of the wall and then there are three lovely ladies or men on the other side of the wall okay here's the catch one of them is a immediate family member of the person on the other side of the wall but they're using a voice distorter so they can't tell and you have to try and avoid dating your sister

oh god that sounds kind of horrible that sounds fucking horrible can you ask are you my sister super entertaining that is a good show though don't blow it

a bunch of people who have never ever blown glass compete head to head for a million dollars to see who can glass blow the best and they're given all the materials

so this is like thousand degree furnaces I mean it is dangerous but it's fun I love it key to my heart a significant other

of the contestant is locked in an escape room and they have 60 seconds to get out of the escape room and save their significant other and if they don't they uh have a video recording of the contestant saying like a bunch of like horrible things so that the person who they're not saving will have no choice but to break up

with them oh man it's high stakes i like that i like that jack of all trades bunch of handymen compete in a variety of handy competitions talking lumber uh working woodworking i heard you're really good at handy competitions dog do you mean like hand i'm saying i'm saying you like jack guys off once you jerk a guy off one time suddenly you're the handyman fuck one goat you heard that what is that from i don't know what it's like you build a house they don't call you the house builder oh yeah you turn on the light they don't call you the light turner on but you fuck one gold the gold fucker for the rest of your life um sorry what did you have that's it i fucking i don't care anymore um i've got family fight oh uh steve harvey still hosts

okay uh but in that's just what they call it in the rest or uh always sunny shit okay i think that's the name they do like a rip off of family feud and always sunny sorry okay then i'm gonna do a different one this one's called assistant uh you are high contestants are hired as like high profile assistants and they go through a series of obstacle courses while doing things that an assistant would do so you're holding a tray of like scalding hot coffee while going through like a wipeout style thing you have to open a bunch of letters without getting paper cuts uh and you try not to get fired is that just the celebrity apprentice okay um we're gonna switch to i don't know i've actually never seen the show okay we're gonna

switch to rookies the punishment being you get fired though feels derivative play players players uh who are professional athletes swap sports with another professional athlete and we watch them compete at each other's sports that i would love to see i would love to see lebron in the nfl me too i would love to see are you sure that one doesn't already exist i need to do another one i'm sorry they sorry i'm sorry i'm in my own house i'm a little too comfortable for my own britches now we've got all right i got a question for you yep we're both doing fantasy football what are some i know we both like to do like fun rules in our leagues what are some of the fun rules your league is doing this year uh well in my league if the announcer calls a white player

scrappy that player gets five points i like that uh we do double points if you're watching the game really rewards attentiveness so also rewards having like an octobox going but if you see the play happen involving your player double the points we always do the team who scores the least amount of points that week has to take the winner out to a dinner worth the amount of points that their team scored so if your team only puts up 85 points you're taking the winner out to an $85 dinner that's nice i like that we do the thing where um oh well on our rosters we have one spot for referees so you pick one referee crew each week and you start them and the more the more flags that they call the more points you get and you get points for the yards too and so the

teams that are playing against the chiefs yeah that's a ref crew to keep your eye on in my league if one of your players makes another player smile that's five points that's five points so it we it gives incentive to draft nice players yeah it's all about camaraderie i like that uh kneeling is worth 10 points in my league you got you want guys that win yeah i like that a lot yeah um we do the the player the player who someone started that scores the least amount of points that week that team owner has to run a mile for every point that that player scored so if your player only scores three points and he's the lowest scoring player you have to run three miles okay i like that a lot so it rewards having like maybe just starting one guy who's gonna get zero

like start a guy who's inactive no then you oh so then to get out of the way yeah if you don't think you're having a good week um yeah we do that each doink on a field goal multiplies the worth of the field goal so if you know you're gonna get five points for whatever you know field goal was double doink that's 15 20 actually because yeah yeah uh we just do this one's kind of simple we just do whoever has the handsomest player that week gets five points yeah i will be drafting jimmy g to say the least nice uh we also do the thing where we do a full cfl season of fantasy cfl football to determine the draft order love it so it's like a whole it's like double fantasy football yeah you're actually unironically we do uh or do you have another one

no uh we do in my league we do march madness to determine draft order which is kind of that true yeah nice that's fun yeah all right those were tweeting or something even take her out of the office she's still tweeting during our podcast i'm tweeting no i did like this i just don't know anything about whatever you're what is your what's your favorite part about football season um probably all the guys in those like tight pants yeah you see everyone's joke bro yeah no who's your who's your celebrity crush who's my celebrity crush crunch i feel like i have so many um maybe okay first guy i can think of is the guy from one day i don't know what's yahoo wait we we were just talking about matas yahoo someone we were talking about the israeli

palestinian conflict and someone said what's the who was me and ty oh what's the uh what's the terrorist group call or not the terrorist group what's the thing that sounds like matas yahoo and like israel or there's a guy named something like that and then yahoo yeah someone said then yahoo and ty ty goes the guy that's saying just like a waving flag like no it's matas yahoo um all right wait that he no he doesn't do like a waving flag someone said one of the actuals but they like they yeah they nailed the joke but it wasn't yeah yeah matisyahu does uh you know that song one day sometimes i lay under the moon i thank god i am breathe one day one day yeah yeah that was that was the song all right i think that's it guys um whose personality are you

oh right no she never gave us a who were you actually saying what the guy from one day i'm not gonna be like it's just this guy he's all he's british i think i don't know his name the guy that plays lyle in the menendez show everyone's that's everyone's new crush he's hot as balls you gotta watch this man there's been so many like new white boys this year i know i think he's his fan let's talk about it white boy of the year for 2020 oh yeah i wish scott was scott's not here is he he left yeah who's scott scott scott is the he keeps the tallies for white boy oh that's funny i don't know he sent me one recently i'll pull it up but who let me know what you're thinking white boy the year is actually blank i can't think of sam bankman freud

that's a crazy one uh white boy of the year ah fuck i feel like there was we had such a good list going there were a few that were just no brainers um i think like cody co mcafree it's always up there yeah but he's not playing right now yeah that's a good point uh i feel like austin reeves yeah he's always kind of up there what about like uh post malone with the who's the guy at barry keoghan barry keegan keoghan could be up there who are the i'm trying like what's the big i can't pop culture moments oh the rizzler yeah the rizzler's white boy of the year well it's not over yet it's not over yet you know a lot he no he's white boy of the year there's a white man of the year

okay we had what else is going on this year oh um oh a lot of people have been talking about drew starkey oh the guy from outer outer banks i know but he's just been all over tiktok he's a hottie all right all right i'll take it whose personality is still will um this weekend i am chilling like a villain and I'm gonna play some of my new goat simulator game so I am thinking LaDainian Tomlinson

the goat you've inspired me to get back into flight simulator so I'm gonna channel my Captain Sully trying to land up 747 on the Hudson oh yeah also the Mets are gonna make the playoffs this week so i might steal uh luis angel acuna's personality felt racist somehow sorry my accent's on point

lauren i'm gonna take the princess from the princess and the peas personality why i mean she had a really tall bed when i was in college my friend dobbin uh moved it back to the dorms and needed to store her mattress somewhere and i told her she could put it under my bed but when i got to my new apartment that there was not enough room under the bed so i just stacked them on top of each other the whole year oh that's funny it was like four and a half feet tall if you brought someone over you had to like lift them up onto your bed oh my god and she hadn't really been to my house for a couple months and she came over and realized what i had done and uh that's pretty funny oh bad wait why did she need to store that because she lived in the house

then the school made her move back on campus and uh so she had this mattress didn't know where to put it and so i slept on a mega bed for myself and was there a p at the bottom now you felt it that's a good halloween costume this year princess and the p i will i will tell you there's nothing there's nothing that kills the mood like telling the girl that you brought home that she has to get a running start to get into your bed yeah i don't know dude i feel like i was like did you of those like freshman year dorm beds that were like up high yeah that was like literally like you had to like leap you could adjust i remember like with yeah it was like my freshman year girlfriend like like you know like hoist we did this we might have to cut this out but i just

want to tell you guys this story before i forget it uh i was hooking up with this girl my freshman year and we were in the lifted beds yeah and she fell off the bed and like landed on her butt and uh tried to play it off like it didn't hurt but then like i'm like after like two minutes was just like i'm in so much pain i have to go home she felt like six feet directly under her tailbone and then i had to walk oh no we saw each other walking onto campus and uh had a good laugh because she was like limping but it had we hadn't done anything so it like looked like i'd put in great work oh but like but it was just because she fell out of my six foot bed crazy oh no hey i found by the way i found the text from scott with the ap leaderboard for the white boy of the

year okay let's hear this was as of august 6 17th glenn powell yep oh peyton pritchard okay uh shabuzy oh dude role model role models having a killer role model is tucker high school oh okay I feel like you've said that. I got J.D. Vance on here and Mando Duplantis. Sneaky. Remember that guy? Paul Skeens could be on there.

All right. Well, we've had a great episode. It's been real. We love you guys. We will see you next Wednesday. Have a fantastic rest of your week and a great weekend. Drive safe.