Will & Rusty's Playdate - how we became the bad boys of podcasting

Episode Date: March 31, 2025

Will and Rusty talk about getting arrested for loitering, a cheese panic at the deli, Freaks and Geeks, and Omegle. Rusty also threw a temper tantrum over burgers last weekend, and Will pitches the Shampoo Splitter. Plus, the boys discuss buying Instagram followers, ostriches, and brainstorm April Fools’ pranks that don’t even exist. FOLLOW OUR SOCIALS: https://www.flowcode.com/page/playdatepod HEAD TO http://www.drinktriple.com/playdate TO GET 10% OFF THE ORIGINAL HIGH SELTZER USING CODE: PLAYDATE. 0% HANGOVER, 100% SOCIAL.  ACCELERATOR AVAILABLE ON AMAZON. UPGRADE YOUR ENERGY HERE https://www.amazon.com/stores/page/FB06B38E-F0C2-479F-9DA5-FD4A1C852B07?channel=Playdate TRY HUEL WITH 15% OFF + FREE GIFT FOR NEW CUSTOMERS TODAY USING CODE FRIDAY AT https://www.huel.com/PLAYDATE. FUEL YOUR BEST PERFORMANCE WITH HUEL TODAY! 00:00 Intro 04:30 Catfishing 06:31 Hamburger Frenzy 12:53 April Fools’ Planks 16:41 March Madness 23:45 Grocery Store Blowout 30:14 Roadmap 32:27 Pitch Submissions 40:47 Pitches 45:21 This Guy Rocks 49:48 Teach Me Something 55:25 April Fools’ Pranks that Don’t Exist 01:00:33 Ways to Say You’re Going to Bed 01:06:20 Whose Personality are you Stealing? #AlmostFriday #FridayBeers #PlaydatePod Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This family is on the brink of civil war. Mobland, the hit original series, is now streaming on Paramount+. We are the Hartigans. Don't know the net? Then Google us. From the underworld of Guy Ritchie. Do you want to step up the ladder? I want Comet dead. Starring Tom Hardy, Pierce Brosnan, and Helen Mirren. Do I have to do everything myself?

You want more? I'll give you more! Mobland, new season is now streaming on Paramount+. As always, Playdate is brought to you by Triple, the original high seltzer. Redefining the party landscape. Playdate. Playdate. Episode 92. Lauren's already up and about.

Lauren's moving around. Some live camera adjustments. Live camera op. We should get a floating camera for this. Do those exist? A drone. Should we get a drone? like a guy like a guy holding a camera not we should know we should have one circling a drone

yeah there's actually 80 foot ceiling it gets stuck in all the like holes yeah i saw a video i must have been like some i think it was like boca raton one of those south florida towns and these kids yes shout out boca raton mouth rat is that what that means what boca raton does that mean mouth rat it's got there's got to be a probably a looser translation but yeah what is yeah what does boca raton mean mouse mouth um that's crazy okay we'll come back to that they're the these kids stole a golf cart and it got picked up by like a drone like the cops were using a drone to like track them and then they get out and run they're just like kids it was like a harmless maybe not harmless they stole someone's thing you shouldn't do that but like

does not warrant like a drone and these guys were on comms being like all right they're on foot and then they could they'd heat maps so they can see where these kids go because they're like bodies are emitting heat okay yeah and they like went out and got the kids at gunpoint firing squad well i mean it's like a parent's worst nightmare like what you think's gonna happen it's like where's where's tim like i haven't seen him firing squad we call the police like yeah we executed him by firing squad at 8 a.m he stole a golf cart no trial martial law what it's a hypothetical kid getting killed by a firing squad it's not a real guy does that sorority girl who like can't stop getting arrested

oh this it's been like going like viral well last time you told a sorority story it was like all fake so what was it that's time he told the story period yeah true the one you told about the the sorority girl and the in the boyfriend's dad was like completely okay that wasn't true we don't know she obviously she's claiming it wasn't true i feel bad for the whole i was there it didn't it didn't happen it didn't go down like that but this girl got arrested for speeding she was going like way too fast we'll put her mugshot right here and it went viral because she's like a pretty girl nice and then she went on like tmz like i saw her like talking about it on like it went like a little like mini viral for a second and then last week she got arrested for loitering which

is way less cool getting arrested for loitering that means you're such a bad hag that you got arrested like if you look what does that mean what is loitering that's just like hanging out outside like a business so it said loitering and and like obstruction or whatever so maybe they told her to leave a place because like if you're doing something cool and you're loitering they're gonna be like all right that's fine yeah but you got to be doing like the worst you got to just be like the worst yeah calling in uh calling and loitering on like your friend who's over saying is welcome loitering we should loiter the cops come in like we're hanging out in your backyard the cops come in like firing yeah there's like a smoke grenade comes over think get out

which one of you is loitering i got sunburned yesterday oh nice how'd that go well it's i think i'm starting my base tan for summer for a little bt yeah summer 2k 25 wait i have a question yes we can both see you right now okay we can speak for yourself and i don't see okay well sunburned for me i don't really burn but like i i should have worn sunscreen and my nose was a little red but maybe my makeup's covering it up not not that it matters i just wanted to share will thoughts you're wearing makeup yeah thank you thank you someone finally said it but you don't you've like every morning you wake up and you like hate the way you look so you like covered in makeup to appease us yeah i'm a catfish cat have you guys ever been catfished oh yeah oh

i didn't tell you this story no this is a this is a very funny story you remember omegle yeah me and the boys on omegle uh on me and the boys on omegle me and the boys on omegle so i was on omegle i can't remember who i was with but i was on omegle and we thought we met a 14 another 14 year old girl we were also okay or like 13 i think maybe we lied and said we were 14 okay and uh gave the girl our number my number me and my buddy shared a phone we uh no we gave her my number and uh and then he sent a photo of himself and he was like 60 and he said i'm gonna come find you in maine obviously he just knew i was in maine because of my area code but i thought he had like my exact coordinates and i went and slept in my dad's bedroom because i was so scared he was

gonna come to the house did you tell your dad why yeah and he was just like what were you doing i don't know man i don't think i've ever been catfished i kind of want to i don't think do you want to catfish someone you should you should make well that wasn't the question what i know but now continue i should make a what you should you should set up your hinge to be all like really crazy crazily edited photos of you and then just like throw people for a loop that would be unreal be funny i yeah yeah like stretch your face out and like make yourself like a reverse catfish yeah oh so it's people who only show up to dates that have like a really good heart yeah and then you show up in your normal look so i weed out the ones with a really good

heart maybe i give myself like a huge like mustard stain on all my shirts i don't know i'm spitballing okay that would be funny if you were it's your normal hinge you have every photo i've mustard on my huge mustard or just a small one yeah how often is he eating how often is he eating mustard oh my god we had the best burger i was just thinking about i had two hot that was the best burger i've ever had that was pretty good i okay i don't even want to have i'm sorry for i'm sorry for throwing like a temper tantrum flan and i were ubering home and she was just like she was like you can't get that mad about burgers basically what happened was funny we were happy okay thank you was it not a was it did i make did i make you uncomfortable you kind of

dragged it on i know for context we had a bonfire at willie's on saturday and and rusty freaked out that he didn't get a burger for like an hour i i the best part was though when mia just like snapped at you it was so funny i don't even remember i freaked out she was like shut up about it no fucking care anymore well okay i think if i like if i just showed up to a barbecue and i didn't get one that's like one thing you need to get over that i bought all the burgers and the hot dogs and then i didn't get one yeah i i guess it my only was like and then I was more mad at, I was more mad at Flan because I was like, I'm getting up. Those are going to be ready when I get back or before I get back.

Can you grab me one? And then when I got back, everyone was eating their second round of burgers. No, no one had a second burger. And she was like, she was like, it just happened so fast. Like they came out and everyone grabbed one before I could say anything. I was just sitting there. I was like, are there any burgers? He's like, oh yeah, we got an extra one right here.

And like gave me one. I wasn't like scrounging. I might've taken the one you called, but I don't. I wasn't like, there wasn't like a frenzy. Yeah. It was a poorly timed bathroom trip. And then Scott texted me and was like, hey, man, I'm so sorry.

He texted you that? Yeah, he was like, let me Venmo you for the burgers. I was like, no, it's fine. Did he really text you that? Yeah, it was really nice, but I was just like, I don't know. I was just so excited to have one, and they looked so good. It was the best. And everyone was talking about how good they were,

and I was like, great, all right, cool. I'll get it on the next round. If you guys are going to keep talking about it, great. They're like, sure, I'll try one. and then we and then we're ubering home and and flan was like um oh my god those were so good i had a burger and two hot dogs like thanks dude but there were hot dogs there was one that was there was hot dog there was hot dog that got scorched to all get out i hated it was pretty good so me and ava didn't get there for so long i've and i still managed to snag two dogs i think

showed up right when i think you just didn't go for the burger until the end like there were lots of burgers being dished out okay this is true and what i will uh a mistake i will never make again is like let's let everyone else get one and then i'll get in on the second round apparently you just gotta be i didn't realize i was friends with a pack of hyenas that were gonna make it impossible to have lunch or dinner well i think we also had less burgers than people so it was like inevitably someone was i thought i ordered 16 so we keep talking about burt i think it was what do you guys talk about on your podcast burger burger burger mustard stain muntered stain muntered stain what did you guys do yesterday oh man fucking did your friends leave

well uh no my buddy jake's actually still here he flies out tonight dude your friends yeah rock oh thank you those two guys that were in town obviously i'd met them the one that was i'm for i don't think you had many who was uh the guy in the green uh henley who's sitting jake jake fucking rules yeah he's a man you know when you're talking to like you're talking to a new guy and it feels like they're just going through the motions asking you about yourself like because it's like what you have to do yeah he was like genuinely interested in like everyone's life yeah he's a good dude he was killer i'm very lucky my college friends are really good he was like he was asking me like what my favorite things were which sounds like a mail it in question but it was like thank

you finally i've been waiting for this no one asked me about my favorite things yeah we jake and i walked around all day yesterday um just walked around venice i always forget about like the canals they're kind of a cool thing to like show people yeah um i'm even i i've only been in in there a handful of times i've only swam in them a couple times oh the show grows you know they empty them every week yeah they gotta do it which that seems they should do that shit every day it seems like a waste yeah seems like a waste of like resources right i guess we have a lot of water but yeah and a lot of resources with these damn taxes i guess we have all sorts of resources now this podcast is brought to you by triple triple is the original high seltzer with three

milligrams of thc and just 15 to 20 calories better yet now introducing the triple drop a cherry lemon infused boost anytime anywhere this sleek single serve half ounce liquid enhancer delivers five milligrams of triples premium thc emulsion in a convenient grab and go format perfect for those seeking a delicious portable and discreet way to elevate any beverage the Triple Drop is a game changer for anyone looking for a tasty, versatile... How many Triple Drops do you have? Too many. Versatile and social-friendly THC experience.

It's easy to carry, simple to mix, and delivers a perfectly dosed, fast-acting effect, allowing consumers to customize their social experience without compromise. I brought one of these to the local kombucha bar, and I slipped it in my kombucha, and I made weed kombucha, and it was pretty awesome. And guess what? i'll say it i got high yeah man again i'm a guy i don't give a fuck triple is born from a desire to blend thc's social buzz with the social ritual of sipping on a seltzer triple seltzer and drop are currently available at grocery stores liquor stores bars and restaurants in

missouri kansas iowa louisiana georgia florida and south carolina looking at you thomas ravenel it will be available in illinois arizona and ohio by the end of the year nationally it is currently available online to get it now go to drink triple.com and use code playdate to get 10 off your order that's drink t-r-i-p-l-e.com and use code playdate for 10 off your order let's get back into the episode guess what's tomorrow when this comes out april fools day that's one of our drafts oh yeah oh yeah i got a notification on my calendar that was like it was a reminder that i i don't even remember setting it so someone must have brought up april fools and like over last summer and i was like i'm gonna nail it this year and i had

a notification like a couple days ago that was like plan the perfect april fools plank april fools plank you walk the plank and then no it's like one one piece of wood is loose and when you step on it, a cartoon comes up and slaps someone in the face. You got April Fool's Plank. Do you ever do a good one? No. I feel like we talked about this.

What? That was like someone who's been tired of getting ass hit. You ever do any good ones? No, I haven't. Wait, I feel like, did we talk about this on the pod? Over the years, I've always been mad at it. April Fool's Plank? Well, we wanted to have our friends on and be us.

Oh, we wanted to prank the audience? well we still could uh i was no well i yeah alpha words i just remember one time i feel like i told this already but i like swapped my mouse with my dad's mouse oh yeah when he was working it was apparently we tell the same very funny all the time someone commented and was like it literally blows me because it's not just us it's a lot of podcasts it blows this guy away that people just forget podcasters forget that they've told the same stories he's like joe rogan has guys on and they have the same conversation 20 times i mean i think we already do that in real life and then yeah we have to

we do so many podcasts that that's okay though i think um maybe instead of sometimes people really like it when they're like like you're like comfort watching a tv show you've seen before yeah yes me and me have restarted freaks and geeks yesterday for like the fourth time i love that is a that is i've never seen it oh my god well i love freaks you would love freaks all of these stacked the cast it's a stack cast and it was all their like first show i thought that they were making you pick now freaks or geeks yeah no that is who's in it james franco nice jason seagull jason seagull um that's all by the way yeah betsy phillips oh linda cartolini no linda tortellini's in it

i don't even think i said her last name right there's one pasta centric tim ravioli they're all going through the trials and tribulations of high school and one girl's just like hot hot uh hot pasta what that was what i panicked i panicked uh hot pasta uh i was i was a vape god this weekend he started vaping i started vaping this weekend because we were in vegas and uh they just have such cool names so i got a mr fog max that's what it's called yeah and uh and i carried it through the weekend and then i was sitting in kate's office this morning talking to her and took it out of my pocket and she was like what what is that yeah it's like a vape she

was like i thought we weren't allowed to apparently at the last office they made a rule that you're not allowed to vape in the office i don't think that i feel like i saw jason ripping his yeah what are you talking about who made that rule i don't know kate just said she heard that that's funny she said no more vaping because of the smell um there was a point where everyone in office vaped and then maybe it was like in the edit Bay switched we um Lauren you're gonna say something nothing Lauren we went to uh we went to the Las Vegas Nevada mm-hmm I don't like that place I'm so ass it's so I've only been to the city of Las Vegas in the airport for 45 minute layover I act I like felt

ill i didn't like the energy was so it's a dark it's a very grim it's built on like haunted land yeah i did not like the vibes i will not be going back it was it was like it felt like severance like when you would go you'd go in this room and then with no windows for 12 hours 12 straight hours every day oh that watching the games yeah i mean it was fun watching the games i didn't get to watch like although here's my take ready so when this comes out we'll be through a lot more march madness but we're recording this after the first weekend asked march madness there's no cool guy there's no like doug eater jack gulkey you know like there's no like cool guy there's been there's one buzzer beater one buzzer beater yesterday but it was for a favorite to win

people are saying it's the worst it's the worst march about are people saying that yeah i was saying that too so people probably heard they probably heard i was thinking about it lauren just like i don't know lauren lauren asked right before we started recording she's like is there something wrong with my eyes yeah and i said i said no but some you know sometimes you look a little sleepy which i think is is a normal thing to say we all look sleepy sometimes i did i don't think so and will was like oh like i said cold i was like doing like a sucking a dick thing no i was just laughing because you said it and then lauren immediately was like and then you kind of looked over to me like right and i was just like

nope why would i buy into this take now i already know it's not a good one yeah i did just zone out while you guys were talking about march madness but i made a bracket and i haven't looked at it once i don't know like how to log in i don't know andrew nelson was in first a lot of playmates in this uh i think there's like a couple hundred which is nice yeah and if you're one of those couple hundred thank you love you so we're what are we we're giving the we should give the winner one of each shirt and a hat and in like a bonus like bag of four hundred dollar chips we'll give you a jar that will and i both farted we'll give you a big uh bottle of four hundred dollar chips would you call me cheese dick no she goes and a cheese stick and then

we both kind of like quickly looked over and then like went back to this and then she was like wait you have them yeah i've had a colby jack cheese sticks pull up i'm a cheese stick connoisseur you know uh lauren how was venice fest in marvisto um it's on venice boulevard that's why they call it that yeah but we didn't end up going we just went to rasselbach and got beers instead nice rasselbach we were the three of us were getting um getting drinks at venice beach bar and will kept bringing more tables over to like accommodate how many people were there and after like the third one do you hear what the waitress said no you like went to grab like a third or fourth one and she was like yeah fine just take all of them wait that definitely didn't

happen i'm friends with that lady oh then she was like i asked her oh then she was joking yeah i almost called her that i should have then i forgot yeah you almost called her michelle well like i just somehow remember her name from the last time i was there yeah she must have been joking that she was just like oh yeah just take all of them i mean we had like a hundred people do you guys want a triple drop today yeah dude should we get triple actually we kind of have stuff to do i have a lot of this shit to do sorry i'm so hungry i went to get a godmother at uh godmother's like the greatest sandwich in the world at base it is and usually they let me put whatever i want on it and what i don't know my vision's blurry oh jeez you always have like a you're having like a

stroke crazy like ailments happening no you expect us to like keep talking no don't worry my vision's just vibrating and i'm like a head my left arm hurts yeah left side of my body's numb i'm sorry talk about your godmother so usually i take i take the provolone off i take the provolone off and i put american cheese on and the guy was like and then what'd you do the guy was like you're fine you don't get to hear my sandwich story no i want to hear go go go i was like i want i want american cheese on it i don't want provolone And he was like, there's no, we don't do any adjustments. I was like, yeah, you do.

You do it all the time. And he was like, no, it's way better with provolone. I was like, yeah, but I like it with American. What are we doing? And he was like, all right, we can put any, we settled on a cheese that was like halfway between the two. And he was like, all right, I'll do that and provolone. I was like, I don't want, I don't want provolone.

I feel like I've heard of people doing that because they don't, maybe it's like an insult to them that if you, if you mess up their perfect sandwich, American sounds kind of crazy on that. And so, but he was like, he was like, I'll do both. And I was like, I don't want that. Just put the other one on. And then he, when he handed me the sandwich, he goes, I put extra cheese on there for you. And I was like, I didn't want it that way.

But then it was delicious. He's a purist. Yeah, but it was like, he kept saying it like he was doing me a favor. He was like, I put extra cheese on there for you. I don't want that. It's the opposite of what I wanted. Stuck a few hot dogs in there, bud. Enjoy.

What was I going to say? I had something funny to say, I think, like I usually do, right? Something funny. Lauren, what are you doing on your phone right now? Well, you guys, we're continuing to talk. I'm trying to post about our new episode. You guys, we're continuing to talk. Yeah, it's a podcast.

No, I had something cool. I was going to, I think it was like some kind of home run story. Oh, I'm going to go to the beach later. All right. Wait, I want to hear this story. this sounds insane earlier lauren was like we gotta be done by noon i'm going to the beach yeah i have to be at the beach by noon no just for like high noon just for uh great so what else is going on

well do you have any um bread here today what bread yeah but oh we were really scraping the bottom of the barrel here did you bring any bread um you're out of stories lauren lauren don't worry i've got one in my back pocket will do you have any bread no that's this is an interactive story uh no i don't have any i i've i haven't bought groceries in a long time comment down below your favorite grocery to buy what comment down below your favorite grocery to buy oh my god i speaking of speaking of groceries i went to get uh i went to pick up some guinnesses from whole foods the other day there was a full i wish i wish we took a picture of it someone had like a blowout in the parking lot like oh no not shitting it looked like it was either that or someone or someone

spilled their like frozen coffee frozen uh but it was like a huge crazy liquid dump in the parking lot there's definitely coffee there was not a crazy liquid dope it had like it was either a coffee or a crazy liquid dump in the whole foods it wasn't like lick it was like it had made a mound of itself like a frappuccino or something but it wasn't frozen so maybe like a crappuccino we got a large crappuccino from oh did you guys know that starbucks is not doing frappuccinos and all those fancy drinks anymore no wait what no that's can't be true no it's true mia used to work there for four years and literally the week after she quit they took starbucks for four years she was a shift like supervisor wait what is what keep going you're

saying starbucks is done making drinks yeah no like the fancy only bagels now this is good is stuff i saw what did you i don't know yes yes starbucks is still making frappuccinos great thanks title of this episode yes yes starbucks is still making crap they're cutting a lot of them it says i saw brawny oh yeah oh yeah ronnie at a stoplight and um he was in a convertible but he had his hood up so you couldn't see who it was i think you should have to pick them wait you couldn't see who it was the only way i saw it is because he looked like if you if you pulled up next to him and he was looking this way got a deep enough hood on i wouldn't have been able to tell but he looked over or neighbors and what'd you say i said i said um

i said hey bronnie keep your head up he's been playing great actually yeah he had like uh he had a good game in a game where they got like smacked but he was the leading scorer well yeah but lebron and Luca and Hachimura were all out. So it was like they were going to get smacked. And he stepped up. And more importantly he played confident. He didn't look scared out there. He looked confident

in his decision making. I'm very excited. I want him to be good. We had a family, speaking of USC athletes, we had a family friend who I think she ran track or rode at USC and she would sit next to Juju Smith-Schuster in a class and

apparently one time he leaned over and just told told her that he loves thick white girls she was like oh cool but it was like it was like at the beginning of class is she a thick white girl uh yeah i mean like like was this just like a fun fact or no i think it was i think it was with the hopes that god i gotta go she would know that he was now interested but it was like at the beginning of class because i've leaned over and said similar things to you and you haven't better than i like me too man all right you've heard us say this before but you guys are missing out if you haven't upgraded your energy to accelerator this stuff is the real deal as you may have seen i polished off one of these

bad boys this ain't new i don't know if it's a new flavor or just a one a new one we got our hands on passion fruit delicious i had a cherry ice one this episode yeah so we've been uh putting them back like it's our job they make me feel great and look great and they taste great so that's about all you can ask for it's zero sugar it gets the metabolism going it's a 100 natural caffeine and there isn't an energy drink that tastes better if you need a sign to try it this is it my friends hit the link in our bio the bio to go get it on amazon whoa accelerator let's get back into the episode corvette corvette that's what i think of when i think of juju smith schuster why i don't know who is that um smith schuster yeah it's a wide receiver he's awesome

now google jeremy curly oh wait we didn't do number 92 oh yeah episode 92 i'm gonna go warren buffett chris pronger oh it's kind of close try chris pronger number yeah not even close you're 70 you're 70 i was only 70 points off uh now what who's 90 we gotta we gotta think about this who's 92 years old um i think i know angus 30 or 29 now 29 it's his birthday today yeah he's gonna have a huge meltdown when he turns 30 yeah are you scared to turn 30 lauren i don't think so i'm scared for you to turn 30 though i'm pretty far away from it you're gonna look so sleepy at 30 um no i know in 92 that's

gonna be freaking um i know exactly who this is zach allen zach allen umbaba do you see uh do you see that guy damn it gout gout just set the record for like fastest 200 meter no what an awful name for a runner gout gout yeah it sounds not yeah it's not a good one you know gout's the disease of kings gout gout because they used to sit they used to sit around all day so like it was like a like if you had gout it showed that you were just doing oh you were chilling yeah i like that i like that a lot we would have been we would have been fucking status symbols back in the day because it was you were supposed to be pale fat and have gout

i'd be i'd be like a supermodel i mean yeah you can't even see my feet you know yeah completely green they'd be like they'd be all obsessed with my milky white breasts milky white milky white roadmap all right uh we have a great episode for you guys today we're gonna hear your pitches followed by our pitches and then it's willie's turn to do the permitting division of the building department if he's okay with it not gonna force him to do it uh then we're gonna do fuck i don't have one lauren and someone from last week uh then we're gonna do everyone's favorite segment no that's

supposed to be our job now that's not lauren's job but she already she like went out of her way i texted a bunch in the group chat okay then we were gonna do this guy rocks this guy rocks this guy rocks today hey someone did clock it they and i didn't even realize i was doing it i think the theme song the reason we add today at the end is from the let's rock let's rock today i don't know what's that school of rock he's talking to one of the kids and he's like look at me let's rock let's rock today i don't think it's because of that because i think it would sound really weird if you're like this guy rocks this guy rocks this guy rocks yeah and then we are going to do everyone's favorite segment teach me something followed by uh april fool's pranks

that don't exist and ways to say you're going to bed. Yep. And we're back. We tried the permitting division of the building department but it did not. She didn't pick up. Boo. Send us your parents who will pick up.

Someone also made a point that it is the middle of the work day. Well, tell that person to go fuck themselves. Jesus, dude. I don't give a fuck. Dude, I'm turning on the playmates. I fucking I'm not turning on the playmates. I hate them all now. I hate all of them now. Oh my. i'm trying to be edgy yeah that sells now yeah it's like it's like one of those like love like

i want them like if i if they if i ever see one in the wild and like fuck you will yeah it's like how like uh like fred durst and like limp biscuit when they come out to like tell all the fans to go fuck themselves yeah that's kind of my new mom like i'm like the new for this the badass the bad boy of podcasting fuck you um i'm sorry guys i got excited all right are we ready ready barely pitches first pitch is from tanner garoppolo tanner says dear snakes of the ozarks what is the worst part about owning a dog in your 20s when living with your friends uh gotta like bring it everywhere uh yeah feed it feed it like leaving it with your roommates and then they have to like watch it can't jump that high there's like oh your roommates like

leave shit everywhere for them to like eat to remit uh eat their food okay um nobody wants to deal with the commitment of actual of actually adopting a dog well now there's the solution also will you kind of like pitch something like this in the past or just brought up the idea the introducing rover rent the revolutionary app that works with local shelters that will deliver you a dog all hours of the day the user interface is very similar to breeds and other food delivery apps just make a profile fill out an application and pass a background check and boom you're able to rent a dog for a few hours have you ever been hung over with your boys and need a morale boost rent a dog for a few hours the app will allow you to pick trained dogs

by breed or age puppies will cost more and like fostering a dog if you end up falling in love you will be able to adopt the team the developing or wait what i'm sorry i'm like so i was like mixing up the words you will be able to adopt them the development team is working on an update now to include cats and chimps no cats and chimps no but they're bundled you're you're hung over and you see like a knock at the door a chimp comes in just like wrecks all your who the fuck ordered the cat and chimp it's like when you order like taco bell and then you fall asleep they're bundled You, like, order... Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

You wake up after a night out, and you just talk, woo, woo, woo, woo! All right. All right, who ordered it? Who drunk ordered the chimp? Baby chimp. I like that.

It seems really unethical, but I like it. I agree. Yeah. I like it, too. I just think the dogs would get so confused. Yeah, but they don't...

They're freaking dogs, dude. They'd get sad. I love it. Everybody... Speaking of dogs, I am currently still house-sitting, and the Beagles, if you guys remember the story...

at your work like i'm fucking with you sorry go ahead a few episodes ago i told a story about having to rescue i had to save my old neighbor's dog from him escaping and i'm housing for them right now and they're just such sweet little babies and are you supposed to be there right now no i look i mean they have a yard so i when i leave in the morning they have a gate that works yeah well they fixed it do they have um do the dogs know any tricks or is it just normal no they're they're dumb they honestly are kind of dumb but they're really cute dog tricks that don't exist dog tricks that don't exist jumping through a hoop shit on command good all right thank you tanner this okay so this next thing is there's like he has a bunch of little little

ideas i'm just gonna read all them um steven t nimrod hi guys this might be different his name is steven t nimrod that can't be a last name no all right well that's like an insult right for a green day album oh steven steven nimrod that's his birth name it says on his thing we can look at him on up on linkedin i googled steven t nimrod i refuse to believe that yeah steven t i'm sorry that's so funny though all right chat steve nimrod all right well steve says steven t and the nimrods hi guys this might be different but i have a lot of ideas in other outlets so i'm just going to spray and pray with some ideas also these are good ideas so lauren

don't read them on monotone bang scratch and sniff menu dining room table with can i just rip all them off or do you want to talk about them no just rip yeah scratch and sniff menu dining room table with a water dispenser ripped dollar association the rda if you find a ripped dollar they put you in touch with the guy that's got the other half beer cappuccino apple what is it beer cappuccino your cappuccino apple pay hats for homeless guys i don't know what that means do i get sleep on the sidewalk oh yeah i actually like that my department store idea all this stuff flies around a conveyor belt you grab what you want the weighted zipper i know it's not a pitch just needed to get these off my

chest the weighted zipper like you just release it it says it says the weighted zipper in parentheses prank idea oh that's funny like every time it goes up it just goes back oh it just oh that's funny oh my god we were walking around weighted zippers oh wow that's like a steven t nimrod is red hot no all of those shout out nimrod i like the rip dollar association yeah you're walking through vegas and uh and i realized that my fly was down and my penis was out of my boxers oh but my penis wasn't out of my pants it was just like if it could have been really i thought you're doing that on purpose we got in we when we landed in vegas we like got in the uber that our boss had called and uh everyone was like yeah i think i'm just gonna like they're like what are you doing

everyone's like oh i think we're just gonna eat and go to bed and i just like as a joke i was like yeah i'm gonna get a hooker yeah can't wait to get my hands on a hooker do some blow and uh the driver just turns around and goes well uh i'm assuming you didn't mean to select quiet for this ride like it was like an uber comfort where i guess our boss had put yeah why i preferred and uh it was funny and then he tried to talk to us so i kind of fucked this yeah we got it i got an argument or not an argument we were talking to an uber driver one time and i was telling the other passengers like our friends like yeah dude i selected quiet because i need to do some work in like a previous uber and the guy was blasting music

and then our current uber driver was like well that quiet preferred just means they they're not supposed to talk to you they're allowed to play music as loud as they want you're like well that was also my take during this whole incident i was like quiet doesn't mean i can't talk yeah i just don't want to talk to you yeah i'm not setting my own settings if i want to make my hooker joke i expect you to eat it in silence and it was awesome uh all right should we pitch each other yeah i would like that we're taking a quick break to talk about our newest sponsor huel huel is so much more than just a protein drink it's everything your body needs all huel meals and bars provide 27 essential

vitamins and minerals, plus a 100% nutritionally complete balance of protein, essential fats, carbohydrates, and fiber, and they now have a product for every occasion, whether it's a meal on the go, a nutrient-rich drink, or a protein-packed snack. Protein-packed snack. I said

packed. Forgive me. My favorite is this iced coffee, black edition, ready to drink. Crack one open right now. It's incredible. Tastes like a milkshake. There we go. when i drink it i am so much less tired because it has vitamin b12 to reduce tiredness and fatigue

it's got vitamin c to support the immune system contains so many other nutrients like the right amount of protein essential fats carbs fiber vitamins and minerals i like you all because it requires no prep or cooking so i can have it on my busy podcasting days when i don't have time to fully cook a meal and the best part is it affordable with high protein meals under five new customers visit huel.com slash playdate today and use my code playdate to get 15 off your first order plus a free gift that's huel.com slash playdate today let's get back into the episode should we prank learn oh yeah let's prank her and say how about i just slip in a word that is made up during my pitch yep it's like a flaunt

it's like a flange but it has like more of a curve right what's a flange what are you talking about like in this scenario what are you gonna say i'll just go let's just go with it yeah all right what is the worst part about wrinkly clothes wearing them wearing them they're wrinkled there you have to wear them you have to put them in the dryer to get the wrinkles out yep introducing the steam closet okay hang up your clothes in whatever condition close the door yep steams the fuck out of your closet everything is now perfectly yep uh wrinkle-less and it doubles as a sauna or a steam room if you want to get your sweat on i like that maybe you just put on the wrinkly clothes go sit in there and turn it

on yeah i like that a lot i feel like that maybe exists i don't know i worry about the mildew i think it would be a yeah yeah that's okay okay well i think google's broken just eggs out eggs out eggs out before we lose our jobs okay cool uh all right what's the worst part about two in one shampoo and conditioner uh it like it doesn't really do what it sets out to do because it's like it would be perfect if it shampooed and then conditioned but it's like trying to do the same thing so your hair still just feels like you only shampooed i was gonna say like what if you just want to condition what you just use conditioner but i only have two in one champion yeah to the shower at will's house and uh it's just there's no shelves in his thing so the the shower floor

is just covered in everyman jack bottles that are like not even on their side they're just like it's like you it's like you've got a box remember jack open the door just threw everything in and then three bottles yeah they're knocked over okay so he asked me a favor if he could come to my house and shower and then decided to try to drag me in public so that's the last time you ever use my shower again or my house or the last time you use my house that's the last time you use my house so this is the shampoo splitter it's a little machine that you pour your two-in-one shampoo and conditioner into and it perfectly siphons it into two unique bottles so that if you just want a shampoo or you just want to condition you have that option but you only have to buy the one

bottle i like that i also wonder if maybe the future is the two-in-one shampoo bottle is just split down the middle oh there's like two two faucets two hoses yeah i like that uh i got two what is the machine look hoses uh it's huge it weighs about a thousand pounds and uh it's pure metal it's iron it's like an iron alloy and uh it's um 400 uh degrees so you gotta be really careful it's a very heat intensive process okay and it looks sort of like a sawmill oh nice i like it are you just saying that because you're nervous no i love it what i guess i just don't understand how the how the opening would work high level why do you keep

yeah okay i feel like he hates my idea no i love it i guess okay you're saying like how would you physically pour it in or like how how the opening up it would be like it would be like the shape of a flunk and it just siphons it naturally into two does that make sense yes dude i haven't heard what a flunk yeah yeah that is not a word what a flunk a flunk like to like where it like hits it on a point okay here's funnel a flask no it's like a it's like an inverted funnel almost where like that is not a word i and i mean this in the nicest way possible sometimes you and i don't know if it's like the like playing like the the like clueless girl thing is like a bit sometimes you will say things you'll be like what what is that what is that and it's like an everyday thing

a flunk you don't know what a flunk is it's literally not a word you're trying to flunk me it's not a fucking word look it up it's literally not a word Get flunked Stop trying to flunk me I know exactly what you're doing I'm flunking with you We're flunking you Come on man

Alright should we do this guy rocks This guy rocks This guy rocks today Hey hey will this guy I feel like we're missing something No pitch this guy rocks Alright Lauren Pause this immediately and I mean

Immediately i forget what this is oh okay okay uh this is there's a group of guys and they are out on a mic mountain biking trip and um this guy's really going for it and uh i just thought you guys would like it long put on the sound so you can see this put on the sound so you can see this what was he trying to do That was my thought. Wait, pause it, Lorne. Pause it right here.

There's nowhere for him to go. Maybe he's trying to go left? Holy crap. He was going way, way, way too fast. That was kind of awesome. Can we just watch that front part again? I just want to see if there was anywhere for him to go. He panicked and he hit the front brake.

That's what happened. Yeah. Yeah, I guess he could have gone left, maybe. What the hell did they think was going to happen? that was awesome it's miraculous that nothing happened to him that was great it is i like whenever these guys uh whenever these guys you we live in a time now where when something like this happens you usually get to see their point of view which is like crazy when someone like thinks they're gonna die it is funny you're just like oh no oh no oh no like the only thing you

can get out he's like this cannot be happening yeah all right does her boyfriend only have one arm yeah see Wait, it gets better. It gets better. What? Yeah. It was sick. all right a lot to a lot to unpack that yeah so here so really i'd just like to hear from you

how do you think they have been dating this long without her noticing that he was just faking the one-armed thing why is he faking the one-armed thing i think uh i don't understand who this type of content is for and i think that there's a lot of people that make this kind of like i don't think this is satire no no it's not yeah it's uh it's like the same it's the same thing that like darman yeah like gold digger prank in the hood how many followers oh my god um i mean it's a tales old it's a it's shakespeare did this as well it's it's like the it's the old you thought i had one arm uh yeah went for a guy with abs now i break dance yeah the guy also like the hot guy was like didn't he was like kind of a normal body we also did he so now he's just with he's just

with that stranger yeah yeah he's with a stranger now yes yeah it is it's a it is a good question like who who's watching who's watching this us i guess i guess we did just watch it too loud too loud you're the remote yeah i don't like them i don't like them i think i love it all right teach me Something. Yeah. You guys ever heard of Sam Bartram? Yeah.

Oh, cool. All right, next. Please. No, I haven't. During a league tournament in 1937, legendary goalkeeper Sam Bartram played for nearly 10 minutes alone on the field, not realizing that the game had been abandoned due to severe fog. We'll put a picture of it right here.

Oh, that's terrible. Like a soccer goalie? Yeah, he assumed the game was still happening, so he was just like in his stance for like 10 minutes waiting for like the team to come back no one came over to tell him classic bart who's the american guy i don't think so nice um do you know ostriches can't they kick super hard and they can kick a lion and kill it with one kick i swear to god for real yeah it's like something like you're doing like free reading in like fourth grade yeah look powerful enough to deliver kicks they can kill predators like lions

one like a kid in your class just leans over like you know ostriches can kill lion in one kick yeah should we google ostriches can you pull a video of that one google ostrich kicking ostrich kick 4k should i do this no yes no no that's attacks man it's like yeah but we'll it's on youtube like i want to see something die ostrich kicking a line yeah yeah all right that's a 12 minute video perfect okay this one says how just google ostrich kicking man no i don't want kicking man but we can't find a lot click this first one we'll just skip to the peak

my god jesus you can skip skip all right just find the peak this is gonna be carnage peak peak someone had to have commented the peak oh how many views is this what did i think why did i think this video was gonna have like thousands the top comment is clickbait this is not oh my god oh man they're scary jesus yeah can you imagine one of those things fucking coming after you some of these camera angles i'm like holy shit they're big they can also run like 80 miles an hour also why is he like seeking out the hyena just leave it alone they're kind of bad i just want to sit yeah all right yeah i'm really enjoying this but i just want to watch

a nature documentary nature documentary wait can we go see the the man one now yeah shocking moment ostrich attacks me oh my god holy fuck that's the ostrich making that noise yeah it revs up god damn all right um guy's hammered slow-mo yeah jeez louise i'm confused by its body like what is that what is it i don't know what there's so many lumps he's just a little overweight yeah comments oh you mean the ostrich yeah um i started a new book last week and i read like 150 pages yesterday wow jesus very proud of myself what was it what book is it um it's called conversations with

friends yeah it's a pod it's like a transcript of a podcast it's by sally rooney it's the same author who did normal people i haven't read that book but i've watched the show and the show was incredible that's fun yeah she knows how to write a really uh exciting name for her books normal people and conversation with friends it feels like she's kind of mailing it in there all right should we do uh should we do april fool's pranks that don't exist the bad boy podcasting for the audio listeners i was flicking him off what's that flicking him off yeah flipping him off there's many i say either one flicking is like like flicking me off flicking me off no that's a thing i've said both flicking me off sounds like you're

you found my you found my sweet spot oh is it regional yeah i've never heard the first one flicking me off oh i've i've said this flicking off sounds like something you do in the privacy of your own home yeah i've never heard anything like that i agree with that guy it's just another way of saying the same thing the first time i heard this i thought it was wrong that i started hearing more i live in the midwest but i'm not crazy that sounds sexual right also your phone case like we grew up there's like a new piece missing i know we grew up saying flick off the middle finger raised in virginia by a new yorker and a california i would say that too

so maybe it's like a southern thing wait he was raised in virginia by a new yorker a californian and a north dakotan oh it's and a californian slash north dakotan how the hell is that i don't know um yeah i don't want to hear about you guys flicking off all right i'm gonna flick off uh all right should we do april fool's pranks that don't exist yeah these are april fool's pranks that don't exist cottage cheese milk swap you swap their milk with cottage cheese when they go to port in their coffee they think it went really bad oh that's funny oh the influencer you convince your friend to post on tiktok or trial reels and then when they go to bed you pay like a lot of money trial reels did i say trial reels yeah

sorry this is a good you you convince your you convince your friend to post on tiktok or reels and then you pay a bunch to like promote the video and buy them a bunch of followers so they wake up on april 1st with like a million instagram followers and their video went viral and then they think they can like quit their job is that something you can actually do um it's funny that you bring this up me and mia were joking about this the other day we met some guy a weekends ago who his friends for his birthday bought him like a fuck ton of instagram followers so me and me were joking saying that like we were gonna buy each other instagram followers like for our birthday like i can't believe people are actually out here doing that weird i want to

do that though for like scott you just be like what no it would like ruin their instagram weird because then it would people would think that they bought them for themselves yeah i guess but it'd be like funny i don't know it'd be embarrassing if you were like putting out content and then not getting likes but if you're just like a regular guy with instagram yeah scott has like a million followers yeah uh i wonder how much google like how much a million followers on instagram would cost it'd be like jesus it'd be ten thousand dollars i mean because if you get a brand that doesn't know what they're doing like you could sell an ad on that for more than that oh uh someone one of our ad you guys was telling us their podcasts out there they like do that

yeah wait what like they buy a bunch of views on youtube where you like pay to like and then they like sell ads on the thing so it's like no one's actually listening but they're like scamming these companies into thinking that people do oh which is all right willie what do you that's what almost friday does yeah that's why they have more listeners than us uh i've got oh which one are we okay oh the mail prank you go through all of their mail and you throw out all the bills so they forget about them and then they default on like payments love it uh the growth spurt uh you put like little stoppers at the front of all their shoes and then you hem you temporarily hem all their clothes by two inches so they wake up and they think they have like a huge growth

spurt overnight because now their clothes fit anymore i like that a lot uh the trash fire you put a small pilot light in their trash can so when they go to throw out a piece of paper it immediately goes and they think their trash is on fire well it is your trash is on literally it is on fire prank uh the spelling b this one this one requires a lot of prep you change the spelling of like a bunch of stuff they see every day so they think that they're going crazy so like mcdonald's is now like mcdonald's you're gonna go to mcdonald's and change the sign yeah nike has like a y at the end i like that oh that'd be fun yeah the fruit drill uh you take a running fruit drills no uh you get a drill and you drill a hole into all their fruit

so they think worms are eating all their fruit oh my god it's a prank it's not supposed to be fun it's supposed to be badass yeah yeah exactly uh the deja vu okay uh you tell all of their you give all of their friends one line each to just say to them multiple times throughout the day and then insist that they didn't say it so i think that they're constantly having deja vu i like that uh the roof bang you climb up on their roof and every room that they go into you bang on the roof uh so that they think that there's like a animal but then it's following them i like it you're banging on the roof and then you bang each other banging also you i think no more banking on the roof these are the hottest april fools pranks of 2025 uh the sleepwalker yep you offer to get

your friend coffee you bring them back decaf with a bunch of melatonin in it so that they fall asleep at work or school that's horrible all right you wanna do that other intro these are the hottest april fools pranks this year this year of 2025 planks planks these are the hottest april fool's okay these are the hottest april fool's pranks of 2025 that i was just thinking about some meme where it's like when your friend like mispronounces a word and it's like the funniest thing stupid poochie poochie poochie poochie poochie who's poochie uh all right oh these are ways to say that you're going to bed you just stole his thunder what oh

you were gonna do it he was like it was on the tip of his tongue these are ways to tell your friends you're going to bed if your friend jesus if you're flan if you're flan if your friend's name is matt he can say i'm going to play do you want to play with your can more no i want you to put up my can if your name is matt you can say i'm going to the mattress for my matt rest that's pretty good uh i'm clocking out i'm gonna go dance with the lady in black like that uh i'm gonna head to the severed floor dr pillow is operating jesus are you good man no dr pillow is operating on me in 15 minutes i like that uh i'm gonna go see how my sheets taste

i'm going where they can't hurt me z's yeah all right z's all right z's i feel like that one's gonna catch on uh z's yeah i got dinner with the sandman and he's buying powering down i'm gonna go see what's on my mind i'm gonna go put some gas in the tank i'm gonna go hang out with the sleepy time bear i'm gonna go flick off oh all right that was another wonderful episode of play date we gotta crack the number we still haven't gotten to 92 nicholas backstrom try it nicholas not even close i think we i think it's gonna be like a d end hassan reddick hassan yeah

uh wait what did he wear oh god he's a single digit is that bad what does that mean T.J. Watt T.J. Watt it could be something like that yeah 90 I don't know anyone that wears 92 Calais

Campbell Calais no C-A-L-A-I-S C-A-L-A-I-S yeah 93 uh we just google it what no we got i mean we have nothing else to do uh if you're over this

you can leave we're gonna sit here until we fucking get this or a 92 year old 92 year old uh al pacino i feel like we've no no he's that old right he's in his 80s i think yeah uh steven hawking trey hendrickson steven hawking's dead how old was he 76 trey hendrickson oh 91 i got 91 and 93 come on there's gotta be a hockey player that wears 92 i think my dn strategy i'm getting so close so i'm sticking with that um um all right if you made it this far comment um who's like a good pass rusher for like uh aiden hutchinson oh maybe 97 i there literally might there might not be like a commonly known

92 there has to be comment your favorite berry strawberry what it's max crosby max crosby with two oh two x's it's the same thing as you wanting droopy what's wrong with barry barry's fun um i i give up on the number thing i'm not giving okay let's let's von miller what number is he um try it the lady from try von miller try von no von miller try von miller oh he's like 58 um who's the lady from i've guessed her so many times princess diaries cast what's her name julie andrews 89 oh uh dick van dyke oh that's a good one i met him once he was already really old then 99 holy shit right um martin scorsese i don't think he's that old

82 who all right lauren now who's two ten years older than martin scorsese i'm so hungry well we have to get this so i just google it no no no we actually i've invested enough time here we're not leaving until we think of a 92 um guys i'm googling it no no don't don't don't don't don't why you're not gonna get it i'm trying i've literally got 91 and 93 okay 92 michael strahan michael strahan we're 92 i thought that's what it just said james harrison oh is that who that is yeah who's this i don't know damn i wouldn't have thought about that all right guys comment down below your favorite berry for lauren and um text lauren at 405-265-3349

whose personality are you stealing oh this new guy new guy that i he's not new but he's new to me uh masayoshi takanaka cool he he's made a lot of songs that i had heard but i didn't know his name and I love his vibe. I'll give you a little taste right now. It's going to get copyrighted. All right. Sounds nice. Will, whose personality are you going to steal?

Personality... I'm going to... We're going on... I know I'm going to Charleston, so I'm feeling... Charleston girl. Mark Sanford's. Who dat?

He was the governor of South Carolina that uh while he was still governor ran away to argentina with his mistress oh nice yeah and then came back and ran for congress and got elected again really yeah that's awesome you're republican yeah uh wait so what are you gonna steal from him just i'm just gonna ball out in charleston what's up with like south carolina officials having like drama i guess the only two i know are that guy and thomas ravenel but same vibe um i don't know there's a lot of corruption it's all republican nice i'm he was elected to statewide office in south carolina so you kind of have to be he got a uh 22 year old pregnant on on uh reality television twice two seasons in a row

he's a guy yeah dude the crazy part mark sanford said he was hiking the appalachian trail to explain why he was gone while he was governor and then it turns out he was just in argentina with his mistress oh that's awesome he's a man how long was he in argentina like months because he was the hanging apple and trail takes like six months which is also a crazy thing to do while you're governor yeah that is crazy uh lauren uh i feel like i've already stolen her personality but i'm taking doji's personality because i think she's awesome you might have done that last week no it had to have been like a month ago not last week all right all right we love you guys have a great rest of your monday have a great tuesday and we will see you guys

bright and early on wednesday peace lauren play that theme music