Will & Rusty's Playdate - making original songs w/ Kyle Gordon | Ep. 256

Episode Date: October 26, 2026

SEE KYLE ON TOUR: https://kylegordonisgreat.com/  FOLLOW KYLE: https://www.instagram.com/kylegordonisgreat https://www.tiktok.com/@kylegordonisgreat https://www.youtube.com/@kylegordonisgreat8611  SUBSCRIBE TO THE CHANNEL: https://www.youtube.com/@playdatepod https://www.instagram.com/playdate.pod https://www.tiktok.com/@playdatepod Willy: https://www.instagram.com/willdonnellon https://www.tiktok.com/@willydonnellon Rusty: https://www.instagram.com/featherstonerusty https://www.tiktok.com/@rustyfeatherstone Andrew: https://www.instagram.com/andrew_nelson_ https://www.tiktok.com/@drewnelly15  NEW MERCH: https://playdatepod.shop/  PAID PARTNERSHIPS: [e-mail]  GUESTS AND INQUIRIES ONLY: [e-mail] SUBMIT YOUR BUSINESS PITCH HERE: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSdPHd7Ps9TaX-TOozyLhDpr9Y7pFNMP9PX7cHuLxap1R78GWg/viewform?usp=header SUBMIT YOUR AITA STORY HERE: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSdQElfqdQutn3dzl5HcZfey6YWhbVd-n6XE7FkpfosWZyYhyA/viewform?usp=sf_link SUBMIT YOUR CONFESSIONS HERE: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSedx06Mo5EBt7WJAehTXwRoF3JzP0T7-kiDvYOphgxaPvtzKQ/viewform?usp=publish-editor  SUPPORT OUR SPONSORS: If you haven't tried Barebells yet, go to www.barebells.com to shop the full lineup and use code PLAYDATE for 15% off your order. Head to Talkiatry.com/PLAYDATE to complete the short assessment and get matched with an in‐network psychiatrist in just a few minutes. LUCY is the only pouch that delivers long lasting, on demand flavor. Get 20% off your first order when you buy online at lucy.co/PLAYDATE with code PLAYDATE 00:00 - intro 5:55 - introducing Kyle Gordon 15:30 - can of beans prank 25:39 - rube goldberg machine 47:29 - working with Daniel Radcliffe  57:23 - pitches 1:04:26 - this guy rocks 1:14:28 - country songs that don’t exist 1:21:56 - sayings that don’t exist #AlmostFriday #FridayBeers #PlaydatePod #RustyFeatherstone #WillDonnellon  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Unlock unlimited free grocery delivery with PC Express Pass. Shop online and get the same low No Frills prices delivered. Get your first year of PC Express Pass for just $2.50 a month. Learn more at no frills.ca. I have a good, I have like an okay excuse for I'm late. If that's okay. Okay, hit me. I went on a run before this and I had timed it out perfectly so I'd get home and be able to shower and get ready and get here.

Yep, with time to spare. What I didn't account for is what happened in my in my stomach at about mile seven. Oh, yeah, sure. I was in a public restroom in Playa Del Rey for like 30 minutes. What, uh, what was it like a like a restaurant Starbucks one or like a beach one of the ones on the beach? Yeah, yeah, which is grimy. They don't even like, you know, I feel like now the standard is you get like a thing to put on the toilet pole. Yeah, that does help in your favor of like sort of really painting the picture of your desperation.

Yes, exactly. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's a good excuse. That's a good excuse. It also kind of flips it where like you've gone from the guy who was late to now we like feel bad for you. Yeah, I made that up on the way here. It's kind of ideal excuse situation.

Yeah, yeah. Are they as bad as the Venice ones? Um, there's less people like... Overdosing. Yeah, there's less like riff-raff, maybe. But they're just, they're metal, you know? They're just like a... Oh, yeah.

No seat. I believe they're stainless steel, which is nice. Is it a hole in the ground or it? It's like a flush. It's a hole in the ground? No, no, no, no, it's a flush. It's a flush. Okay.

Well, I see what you mean, like a port of pot. Yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly. Yeah, we were just, I just, I just did one. We had one of those yesterday. There you go. The hole in the ground, yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, actually, I guess it was two days ago. We were driving from Phoenix to San Diego.

Oh, God. And we, it's like baking. Yeah, we stopped off by, well, literally, because, like, you know, there's like the sand dunes. Yeah, sure, yeah, yeah. So who went to the sand dunes. I was going to say that that does feel like peak hole in the ground. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

In the continental U.S. highest density of holes in the ground. Yeah, exactly. You got to watch for like gophers popping out. Literally, literally. Oh, man. It was like in the middle of like fucking, um, the gobi desert. Yeah. Playday is brought to you by Bearbells.

Shrusty. Show me your Bearbells. I still have a fear of I can't poop in, uh, porta potties because of hoot. You remember that owl movie? Yeah Wait, what happens in that? They put an alligator in the porta potty

They're like Bite the guy's nuts off or whatever I thought you were He's just trying to get rid of He's just trying to like build a development And these kids are like We should kill him with an alligator It's like animal abuse

Yeah I thought you were gonna say like Remember like that E coli outbreak And then the seats were like I'm afraid of crocodiles In the basin I mean also You ever see this videos

of people like pushing them over. Yeah. Oh, God. I saw one that that went the way you'd want it to go because the guy who's pushing it. That's a,

that's a, that's a super villain move. Oh, that's, nothing worse. I'd rather you like shoot me in the arm. Yeah, correct.

The guy who goes to push it, uh, the like structure, like the walls. Yeah, move, but the base that holds all the poop stays and he slips and falls into the,

oh, can you pull this up? Oh, the guy who pushes it? Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, like the Superville. Google, like, Port-a-Pottie disaster. I'm gonna be honest.

It feels so too good to be true that I'm wearing this is gonna be an AI. Yeah, yeah, I was just thinking that it was like. Port-a-potty, like, push-over guide trips. Yeah. Man, trapped in Port-a-Pon for eight hours. I just get a knife, right? Aren't those walls like paper thin?

Yeah. That's like, the plastic on the porta-potties are like, what they like wrap action figures in. Yeah, like, you can just get, like, Which you are deceptively It's like what they do like pencils in and you don't know how to Yeah, yeah, yeah Yeah, yeah

How we're supposed to open those? Bro got airlifted in a port-a- I mean any one of these would be like What just discovered like nine Impossible to imagine scenarios? What like porta-pottie related injury do you need to They need to airlift the whole port-a-happi To the hospital

We're not to be able to take about it. We don't want to take any, we don't want to take any chances It's like they tried the jaws of life but it was just like too risky. You see them loading the whole thing into an ambulance? Putting it on a stretcher. The guy inside's fine, the porta potty's hurt. Also, that one says epic toilet man spies on women.

I'm gonna go out on a limb here and say, he doesn't sound very epic. Yeah. He sounds... Or it's like, this is like late in the career of epic toilet man. Right. It used to be awesome. And then it's involved.

Like, that's, like, exactly, like late in his career, like, oh, what is epic toilet man? He took a bad turn. Oh, my God, he used to be my hero. Yeah, exactly. The money stopped coming in, when he was spending, like, you know, yeah. This might be, we might have found the greatest, like, Google sentence to Google, because it has given us, like, oh. A wealth of scroll up for a second. That one are there, Guy leaves toilet wearing portable tent.

I think we got it, we got to check that out. We'd be fools not to check that out. Of all of them, that's the one we're going on. He looks like fucking dark Vader. That's also the guy in a different scenario who had to get airlifted. That's the only way.

That's how it happens. Oh my God. What, uh... Oh, my God. Is that like a rain thing or a fashion? No, it's his home. That's his dad. Yeah, exactly.

That's epic toilet. Yeah, a big toilet man. This is back when he used to be fun. Yeah, that was like early in his career. And then he started spying on women. Now I can see how he done it, obviously too. Oh, my God. Oh, man.

Well, how are you, Kyle? It was really introduced. Oh, yeah, we have Kyle Gordon here. Kyle Gordon is here. And we're gonna be talking mostly, mostly portable tents. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You're on tour right now? Yes, I'm on tour all over.

And yeah, we're about halfway through the the tour so I've been on tour since like three weeks, four weeks. Where did you start? Minneapolis ran I have Philly, we had like a one-off but I'm I live in New York so it's like that's out and back but the real tour started in Minneapolis Is it? Okay, nice. Bus?

Van. But you start the same band that from Minneapolis? Yeah. Yeah. Do you ever fly and have the van meet you? Yeah, and it fucked me very badly because and this happened last tour I don't know why I fucking keep doing this but like my show is very like screaming and I do a lot of like crazy shit.

And then this is kind of a boring story, but like I flew, we went to, I had a show in like Tampa and then we went to Gulf Shores, went to Florida Bama. And then flew back for my cousin's wedding and then flew to Dallas. And then just like kind of like all in one big trip.

And that's when I was telling you before, but like, you know, to go from one climate to another to another and then you're in the plane. I did the show in Dallas. I got to the end in my life. like voice like exploded and like my vocal chords like it was like like like you felt it happened it like was like a moment yeah yeah yeah it's like the worst thing so uh yeah it was like a vocal cord

hemorrhage this was like a week ago that is horrible yeah so but you're back already how do you like how do you heal that is there like you don't speak and do podcasts yeah it's like the worst yeah it's like the worst yeah it was fine it was it was it was I wasn't as bad as I thought it was, but yeah, but most of the time, ideally, I'm just like driving and you just keep going and yeah, it's been fun. It's been good. I've been seeing clips of your tour and I was thinking about this. How long does it take to get into like the other, because you wear a different outfit for each one. Like how do you, are you doing like quick changes? Pretty much. I've got it down pretty smooth. And then sometimes we'll do like set up a bit and then I run off stage and do it.

But like a lot of times I've got like a hat rack on stage with like my, my, stupid bullshit yeah yeah so yeah how many songs are you doing at each show like 15 nice 16 something like that is it all musical yeah i mean i do little bits in between but it's like really more like a concert now so it used to be like more like a comedy show seated you know at the chuckle hut and whatever but like it's so much better now because i have like a full band so it's like standing room yeah energy energy yeah that's so it's so funny going like through of the genres. I feel like that would be like confusing as an audience member to go for.

If somebody like didn't know what they were getting at me. You're like, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. I'm having a hard time pinning this guy down. I don't totally understand this. My favorite part is like by the end of the show, I do call out the like miserable, confused girlfriends that who have been dragged there. Yeah, yeah. Like, it was so clearly a birthday present.

Yeah. So excited. A lot of birthday presents. A lot of... It's actually mostly... Yeah, most of my... We sell cake at my shows now? Most of the attendance is genuinely birthday presents or condolences.

I think that was at door revenue is cake cutting fees. Yeah, yeah, exactly. I'm curious, like, the, like, obviously you care about music, like you're very talented at it music. Was that, like, did you want to be a musician and then comedy into... Like, what was the order of operations there, I guess? Yeah, it was definitely comedy first. Like, music was more like a... was more like a nerdy passion thing.

Yeah. And then I started developing this like character thing and like incorporating the music. And it kind of like from a comedy perspective, it was like I started doing improv in New York. And then I wanted to be able to have like a solo comedy act, but I didn't do stand up. And so that's kind of how it came about.

It was like, oh, I'll be able to do characters, just show up with me in a guitar and kind of do this whole thing. But yeah, it was definitely comedy first. What was the first song? Did you have like one that, that like, that I wrote or that like, that you wrote? Yeah, yeah, exactly. Let's just start from the beginning. What was the first one you heard and then we can kind of move to which one you wrote?

Yeah, yeah. Actually, the first song I heard was a song that I heard in my head. You know, I'm just kind of like a savant in that way. Yeah. I didn't even know other guys were making music. I came out of the womb harmonized. Yeah, no, but the first song I wrote is actually a song that I would end. Pretty much, it was like this character.

It was like a pop punk. Emo character. So I have this song like, Worst Life Ever, My Life is the Worst Life Ever. And that was the first one. And so, like, back in the day, I would do it like with a full band. And the whole show was like this pop punk emo parody.

Yeah. And then, yeah, that was the first one I did. You ever do any songs about like soda? Soda. Soda pop. Just like soda pop pop. Oh, pop punk. So yeah.

No, no. I thought what I meant. So to pop punk. I was talking about my thing. I did this like, oh, yeah. I made three songs about Mountain Dew earlier this year. Oh, fuck, yeah.

Hell yeah. Thank you Mountain Dew for allowing me to do that. But I just didn't know if you had, I'm just glad that you sit out of the soda space because I feel like that's sort of mind. It's like kind of yeah, yeah. It's a small corner. It's a very small corner. And it's like room for one guy. And it's extremely competitive and you're really trying to hustle people out.

I do like that pop. I should have called it pop punk would be good. Well, you've cornered the market. You don't have to stop. You're like, there's like when it comes to soda songs, there's probably no more than three. that anyone could possibly have. Obviously you can do bubbles, which is like no brainer. I mean, you can do something with the bubbles,

and then this, do sugary, and then, yeah. We could go diet, sugar-free. Oh, fuck. Dude. That's four or five. How about you might be coming in high-gloid? Open, like, next week, it's like a variety article, like, Kyle Gordon moving into the soda space.

Fuck. New song, Diet. I hate this guy. This guy. Oh my God. Andrew, I have a question for you. You are wearing a race suit today. I am.

Hit me. Whatever you are. Because he always wants, he always wants to make it about race. Yep. I misread the email. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I was under the impression that Jeff Gordon was coming in. Yeah, yeah.

So I was surprised when Kyle was. I was very, like, pleasantly surprised, obviously. Okay. But all the questions I have prepared are not for you. Sure. I would read that. Do you want to go through them anyways? Sure, yeah.

I mean, I may, you know, I'll do my best. Yeah, we can just, we can see how this goes. Okay. But, yeah. Because Jeff Gordon is a different guy than me. What was it like when you won the Daytona 500? When I won the Daytona 500? Yeah.

You want me to just give me my best shot? Yeah, sure, yeah. You know, just for the pot, you know, I just, I want you to be able to use this. Right, right. It was awesome. It was like, it was like, I, like, I knew it got off to a little slow start. I was going a little slower than everyone else. But after a while, I kept going and going and going and going, suddenly I'm like, I'm going faster than him.

I'm going faster than him. By the end of the race, I was going faster than everybody else. and when you do that, that's how you win the race. That's kind of the key, right? That's kind of the crux of the whole the whole sport. So once I knew I was doing that,

I was like, I'm faster than everyone else. If I can keep this up till the end, I'm home free. You got a good shot. And the guy who does that wins the day who's doing a fire. If I go faster than everyone, I had a bare minimum, I got a shot.

Yep, yeah, totally true. Yeah, so that was awesome. Perfect. And then I had, what, What was your favorite memory with Jimmy Johnson? Oh, favorite memory with Jimmy Johnson. I want to make, so you can use this on the pot. The thing about Jimmy is he loves to pull pranks.

And so literally, I was at the podium and we were, it was champagne, everyone's champagne. And then everyone's champagne. Everyone's champagne, champagne here, champagne there. I'm the winner of the Daytona 500, the race I won. It wasn't easy, but I did it. And then I go to sit down for an interview. I look down, whoopee cushion, and who's behind Jimmy Johnson? That's awesome.

And he was like, I'm Jimmy Johnson. I'm the one who did that. And then everyone carried him out on their shoulders. And so that was just, but that's like the kind of fun we get into. Yeah, that's like kind of classic Jimmy. Yeah, exactly. He loves to do that. Like, shake your hand, ow, it's a thing.

Point behind your ear. He's kind of like a novelty prank. Yeah, yeah, novelty prank. It's mostly like pranks that you can purchase. Gum that chocks you. Yeah, exactly. Oh, yeah. I had that bit with gum that chock.

It, like, it says like an horrible slur on it. Gum that chock's, oh. Jesus Christ. Did he ever do like a can of like maybe beans where there's a worm that pops out. Yeah, yeah, like, uh. But it doesn't look like any more of I've ever seen. No, it kind of just looks like, um, like, uh, a slinky with like, like a Chinese finger

trap material around it. Yeah. Uh, yeah, uh, yeah, he would love to do that. Oh, really. I, yeah, those are, I never understood why they didn't make them actually look like cans of beans, right, you know? Or any sort of snake. Or worm.

Yeah. Or just real worm. Any snake? Any snack that would be a normal one for your friend to, you know, Wanted. Yeah, yeah, that's a good point. Like, even if it was, honestly, the better prank would it be, just, it'd be being beans. Yeah, that would be more

shocking. You open it up and you're like, oh. And you want, we should eat these now. Yeah. Okay. Yep. Yep. Yeah, just getting your friend to open up a can of beans and then just look at it for a little bit. I think that that might be, we should do that prank. Can we, you remind us to do that?

I would like to, yeah, we can circle back on it? I wanted, can I share something with you guys? I wrote this down. if that's okay oh this is my idea cool and unusual punishment Tony Hawk kick flip on your nuts

metal band plays in your ears till they bleed cool and eat a teabone steak till you throw up yeah yeah that's awesome that rules I'm a big fan of that

you can have that I guess. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You could get at your show tonight. Cool, yeah. I'm going to be really, you know, mouth swirling around that cool and unusual punishment. Yeah. Yeah.

That feels good. One of the girlfriends that her boyfriend dragged there is like, I kind of understood all the songs, but when he did that, what was that whole thing about the cool and unusual punishment? The guy's like, yeah, I've been watching his stuff for like years. He's never, he's never done anything like that. Try something new tonight. I don't know.

Dude, honestly, it's terrible that you've put me that in my head. They're very may well me be a chance. I'll be like, I'm going to try a cool unusual punishment tonight. And it may just be five minutes of nonsense. Yeah, yeah. And maybe like, who's like the coolest guy? Who's the coolest guy? That's a good question.

Dead or alive? James Dean. James Dean was pretty cool. This is easy. He would be in the dead category, right? Correct. Yeah, yeah. Are we talking cool, like, suave or cool?

like sick. Ooh, yeah. Because I feel like, like, Travis Pastrana skydived without a parachute. Yeah, probably, yeah. That's insane that that's a thing that someone did. Yeah, but it's like, like, Alex Honnold is badass, but that guy's not cool.

No. No. Correct. Yeah. I think, but Travis Pastrana does kind of check all the boxes. I don't know who that is. He's a BMX, right? He was like, uh, kind of a, I think just like generally kind of a showman. Oh, just like, uh, yeah. He was like a bear devil. A red bull wet dream. Yeah, he did a little did a Red Bull commercial where he jumped out of a plane about a parachute

What does that mean? He jumped out of a plane without a plane he just landed He's sick He worked on his knees for a year and a half Click on this video what do they cat someone catches him or something? Oh like a guy on the ground Yeah, yeah He's like we did not think this through I've been a guy with another parachute coming he's coming way he's coming down way faster that I thought I mean How fucking crazy is that. That's crazy.

That Ribble is going to fucking hit someone. There was another guy who did it where he just landed in a net. That's like a cartoonish way to. Oh my fucking God. I think that's a hero. It looks like, or that might be San Diego. But like, so like this. And then he let some guy fuck him in the ass.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. The video gets really weird. This I can at least like, you understand the logic of like a, you know, strapping yourself to the other guy. Yeah. The net to me feels like... Wait, so it was like this?

It was that exact thing, but he doesn't have any buddies, and he just lands in a net. So the net must have been like... The net was the biggest... Think of the biggest net you've ever... You've ever thought of. Almost exactly that side. Sure, sure, sure.

That, to me... I don't know. I wouldn't do it. Yeah, call me crazy. I think I'd... Although, if I was ever going to do it, I'd probably want a better shoot. Well, I was going to say,

you could make the argument that's like less badass than Sky. Because he's like he's just jumping out of the plane true. Oh yeah like fully just like these guys are yeah yeah yeah I mean it's trusting someone with your life but you're not really doing anything yeah it's not badass it's cool in that it's just pure trust Yeah, it just means you have a really good friend yeah exactly yeah a talented friend I guess the guy yeah the guy yeah the guy who caught him is the bad yeah Yeah, yeah never hear about that guy but he didn't have like a board shorts and no shirt yeah yeah there's no yeah we would we don't know that guy's name so it probably wouldn't have gotten any views.

They're like Buzz Aldrin. It just says like Mike Johnson catches Travis Bistrona. I don't know who the first guy is, but were you going to ask us if we've skydived? Yeah. I have it. I was. I was going to do that. I saw it your eyes. Have you guys?

No. I would love you. You would love. I would love to do that. I had a buddy, uh, our golf plans fell through a couple weeks ago and he said, I'm thinking about going skydiving instead if you want to go. Same high. And I was like, what an odd, like, pivot?

Golfing in Moore Park versus skydiving feel like very different Saturdays. Makes me wonder what's going through his head when he's golfing. He's like, woo! This is awesome! Why does Andrews scream? It checks the exact same. box for him. Andrew screams,

hell yeah, every time he hits a chip. You miss a pot. He's like, this is fucking awesome. Holy Judeo guys! I feel like his bar for adrenaline

is kind of low. It's just out of whack. He needs to be either end of the spectrum or something. You look over at him reading. He's in like a full sweat. Oh, my January!

I was on a trip a few weeks ago with my buddy's new sister-in-law. That was a weird way to phrase that. She was also there. That's one of the ones where someone says and you're like, I'm not even figured out. Why did he even, why was that a detail he gave?

But she was like a very expressive reader. Like when I'm reading, I'm kind of, I would imagine I'm not making any like faces. Like when you were reading it, you were reading around me the other day. You weren't making any faces. She would like, and you're like, how, also like,

how could it shock you that? Like, you're the one reading it. Well, can I ask? Do you know what she was reading? I could ask. Did I bet? How old is she? She's like two years old than me.

She was, it was like, very born, maybe? It's porn. I mean, she's reading porn. Oh, you think it was like, 100%. She's reading pornography. Let me text her and ask her what she was reading. 100%. Have you read Red rising, Kyle?

Red rising, no. Oh, great. Look at the last, no, but it's just what I'm reading now. I opened up our text. It's an A, she AIed a photo of me and my buddy Oh, that's you. Oh, that's nice. Well, she's definitely reading porn.

Yeah, yeah. That's from her book. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. That she's writing. Yeah. You're texting her right now. That's what she's reading?

I said, what were you reading on the book? I don't know. Crime and punishment. She's like, I don't know what. Oh, yeah. Democracy in America. Yeah, yeah. Or it was like the paper.

Like current events. She said, listen for the lie. Google and Andrew? It's about a. podcaster. Oh, it's a thriller. Adult debut thriller. Come on. Oh, wait. Oh, adult as in, wow.

So this is this woman's first book for adult. Is it like, uh, what is adult? Does adult mean porn in this? Well, that's what I'm wondering. Is it like, she used to do like children's books and now. Oh, it's her adult debut. Yeah, yeah, exactly. Before it was like

the hungry. Or she used to be like, uh, like, uh, children's book. What? The hungry catapal... Yeah, yeah, yeah. The hungry couch. It like needs coins.

I don't know, I was thinking of like... I was trying to come up with the children's work. Oh, you didn't want to say caterpillar because I'd be like, coppers. It already exists. We can't take any risks here. It's now going to be the word adults. Like, our brains are... Adult video store that's porn.

Right. Adult section at the club. What would there be an adult section? It's guys in like smoking jackets and pipes. They're like talking about the world. Is there adult sections at anything? Adult section. Oh, like on the cruise.

Bookstore. I mean, well, I guess. But that's also like, yeah. Yeah. But we had, Willie and I were at an Airbnb a few weeks ago and in our like, don't brag. In the community, there was a teen zone. You're like, in this neighborhood, there was like a teen zone.

Yeah, but the door was locked. Yeah, it also said, teen zone, no wet bathing suits and I told I told Lily that and he goes there go my plans for the evening that's you know something you keep between us yeah well the club zone no wet bathing suits if I'm a teen that's like the only thing I want to be doing in there I feel like right and what because the pool is right yeah did you have any hunch of what was behind that door or maybe it's just like oh just a dark nothing room where they just keep them in there like yeah there's like a hundred in there when in here come on if I

had to guess what's in the teen zone. I bet there's like an Xbox. I was going to say like one Xbox. SSX tricky maybe. Did you have that like the dentist or like orthodontist growing up like video games in the lobby?

Yeah. Ours was the what do you call it like the Rube Goldberg machine? Oh wow. Your dentist had a Rube Goldberg machine. It's not what it's called for you. You drop a marble. It's like every time you go in and you hit a domino

and then you get to watch five minutes as the thing. Takes another guy's like cavity out. drills into your face. It was like, no, it was like the magnet Oh, I think where you'd like drop it. It would just like, there was no end goal. Okay. We also had the, um, it was like the wall where you could like put your hand in it

and like the impression would come in on the other side. You know that was the first viral video I ever made was a room. It was during COVID made my dad and brother made a real gold dirt machine. Didn't the, your local newspaper? The local news picked it up because there was fucking nothing going on during COVID. They were like, we, are the local news. who's in the town I'd grown up in. It was like, family with Lancaster ties goes viral. And in hindsight, the video, I kid you not, had 6,000 views.

That's crazy. Yeah, I don't know, just like got on the right guys. What a time to be alive. I had a cool thing I did, if I may brag about my rebutber machine that I felt like was pretty innovative. I had at one point, it clapped a book down on my laptop on the space bar and played a song. And then I had this subwifer set up with Jenga blocks so when the subwifers shook it knocked a Django block over and started so it was able to send it across the room because it was like

Bluetooth, yeah it was sick that's pretty cool right? Isn't the end result to like open a beer or like pour a beer or something? Yeah the end result was it hit the garage door and there's a beer tape to it and my brother was standing under it and so maybe I did see it

our joke our joke was that he was quarantined and that was how we got it your mom and Laura are like we got we need this pandemic to end Literally, I remember my mom was like, by the sixth take, my mom was like, all right, you get one more.

And then I said that in the newspaper, and she was so mad of me. She was like, now I look like the asshole mom who didn't want to support your dreams and like, your dreams of creating a room. I mean, I guess in hindsight, like, that is what I do for a living. Or not Rube Goldberg. This is how you find out I do Rube Goldberg for a living.

Let me get this right. You make pop punk and Well, sorry, I have a day job. I do Rube Goldberg stuff. I'm the Rube Goldberg things It's what pays the bill The soda wrap is kind of You know

That's for me I work in one of those Rube Goldberg places I'm stuck I have a team My team's in India But I run a team of The guy

It's the guys where They play like the longest obstacle course Of like popping balloons And stuff for like one chicken sandwich Oh oh Mr. Greedy Is that what isn't it?

I think so, yeah. Oh, Mr. Greedy. That sounds like a bad guy. Look up Mr. Greedy. I was watching one the other day that was, I'm not kidding, a 14-minute TikTok, and it was, no, no, no, no, this is different. The ones where it's like, it's literally like their version of Mr. Beast. Yeah, yeah. And it's like these giant balloons and then they run and run and run.

They pop this thing over and over. They're like, oh, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, dude, I want to do some shit like that. You want to be, you want to go on Mr. I want to go on a game? you want I going on like a, would you go on like Survivor? Oh, survive? Yes. Are you a Survivor fan?

No, but everyone in my life is. Yeah, it is one of those things you'd have to just based on the amount of people in your life that would kill you if they found out you. Said down. Oh my God, yeah. My uncle, like, was like a perpetual, um, submitter to a survivor in like the early days. To go on. Yeah. But he was like, he can write.

a unicycle and like his tapes would be like look at me I'm eating a sandwich with worms and I'm juggling like doing juggling bullying tins while unicycling they're like fundamentally misunderstand the concept of the show I don't know if he's seen it

I'm gonna go on the limb and say I don't think this guy's seen the show Probst is like I need to maybe we should sit down with him just to find out if he's seen the show right now it doesn't seem that way I think he's like confusing that with like Johnny Carson in 1968.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, I know what you're thinking of. Carson is 68. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We have a buddy who has applied a few times and has like told me

that he's done a different approach each time because I think he went funny the first time and then he ran into a person who was on Survivor in real life and like somehow got her to like stop and watch his thing and give like notes. So she like, well,

I'm pretty sure it was Parvety who is like, the goat of Survivor. As a non-survivor person, that is a name I recognize. Yeah, he ran in her and talked. Oh, but then there's, I think someone else maybe is the one who actually watched the video, but

he's got a lot of eyeballs on it. I believe Parvety watched his video and gave feedback, which is insane. Yeah. She won the, they did like, one that was all the best Australia versus all the best from the U.S., and she won that too.

Is she Australian? No, the Australian Survivor did a season that was like the best Australian players versus all the best Americans, and she won. So it was like the Super Bowl That's kind of like when I was telling you I guess I spoiled that season for you

Sorry The celebrity all star game My favorite fact of all time is the celebrity Allstar game used to be Canada versus the US And they don't think this is crazy That makes no sense to me That makes no sense to me Like instead of like East West or like choosing

Basketball Oh yeah yeah The NBA Celebrity Allstar game was the US versus Canada Oh yeah It doesn't make any sense Is that how like all the era The like all the Justin Bieber era Was that like does he play every year?

It was like I don't know he still does, but yeah, I don't know. It was him, it was, um, is Jason Sadecas? That mayor that did cocaine. Really? No, no. Dude, that all-time quote from that guys, he goes, uh, a reporter who's like giving him shit for doing crack with, um, prostitutes. And he goes, it sounds like no one's ever asked you to do cool stuff like that.

What was it? He was like you, the bitch set me up. Yeah. Is that what he said? Yeah, yeah. The bitch set me up. That's insane. Oh, good.

Can you pull him up, Andrew? What was his name? Fuck, I'm totally blanking on his name. DC mayor. Rob Ford. Oh, oh, I'm thinking of a different one. I'm thinking one from the 90s,

but Rob Ford, yes, Rob Ford. He's sweaty like ovulating. No, there was another mayor of DC in the 90s. Yes, Marion Barry. He's the OG crack smoking mayor. He's awesome. He's the one who's, the bitch set me up.

Cracks smoking mayor sounds like a, like a, how does that happen twice? And then he got reelected many times after that. Really? He didn't even have a Rob Ford moment because they were just, just like we love Marion Barry.

I mean, was he like getting good results? I'm from the crack. Yeah, he felt awesome. I'm down to look the other way. Yeah. That's so funny. Yeah, what are the odds of two mares having like a crack? I mean, I guess like, yeah.

Yeah, we got confused which crackhead mayor are we talking about. Yeah. What? Yeah. And we didn't even get to Mom Donnie. Knock on wood. I can't wait for his crack. That will, he will, he will, He will be elected till the day he dies if he has a bitseye up moment. He's going to like, stop. Stop fucking writing me in.

I know, I know it looks cool. Nothing good for him for him. I know it looks cool when I smoked crack. Oh my God. I don't know if I've met anyone that smoked crack. You smell it in New York, but. Yeah. Well, I saw, I've seen someone doing it, but I didn't meet.

We didn't talk. Yeah, yeah, me neither. Dude, there was one night. I was, this was like, there's one day and I was doing so much crack. No, I was, it was like, it was like, three years ago and I I'd been out all night and I'd ordered Popeyes and I accidentally ordered

like glitch I don't know oh I told you this yeah I accidentally ordered like seven chicken sandwiches and it showed up to my apartment at like 2.30 in the morning and I was like oh fuck this is way too many and I live right by the boardwalk where all the homeless people are at at night and like you know they sleep out there and stuff and I'd say this is like probably not smart

or safe but I just went out with a bag of Popeye and I was like who wants a chicken sandwich And I like passed him out and these people were this lady was like offering me crack for it. And then she was like, you want me to suck your dick? And I was like, just take the rest of the sandwiches. This pop-a-a-s sandwich holds a lot more weight than I thought of you. Yeah. You like take over the boardwalk.

I could have done enough pop-is. Yeah. Also, really nice. And I could have, surely crack is worth more than the sandwich, right? Or was she just that hungry? Yeah, I just don't think there's a Popeye is very close to the sandwich. Yeah. It's really, that's, that's economics 101.

Yeah, that's like, right. Yeah, micro-economics, yeah. I, uh, the ones in the park that Bertie and I play fetch in have been going nuts lately. There was one guy yesterday who he was kind of in the, he was in the line of like where I was throwing the ball for her. And he had moved there like after I had started. Like, it wasn't like I just showed up and started like throwing it over him. Be honest, you didn't yell monkey in the middle.

did you? He would have played along. These are guys that like, they're there from when I get here and they're there when I leave. They have plenty of time on their hands. I think they'd be down. But they were, they were fun.

He started swatting at the ball when I was, he was kind of. Applied monkey in the picture. Yeah, you act like, like, he was directly and deliberately asking him to play. And then I walked down and there was this couple that I had seen the day before and they had a dog. And when I came down, I started throwing the ball for Bertie and they go, we don't have ours today. And I was like, what?

And they were like, our dog is, we don't have him today. So they're not going to be competing for the ball. Like, okay, thank you. And then I'm driving home and I'm like, wait, they're homeless. Where would the dog be? It's not like the dog is at home. Do they have a dog sitter? Maybe it'd work.

It worked. They got a rover. Oh. I mean, it's cheaper. You're gonna go to the house. Reverse rover where like the dog gets paid. The dog walks you. Okay.

Yeah. I like that. Okay. Kyle thoughts? Let's make it happen. Write that down. Someone write that down. That is.

That's probably, I mean, that's the crack mayor conversation. Like four in the morning being like, okay. The dogs walk you. The dog. The bitch set me up. Guys, this episode is brought to you by Bearbells. I love Bearbells. Sorry, I want to tell you something.

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And it's already, I've had this idea for a long time, and then I've started to see. it, but it has not, I don't think they've gotten it right. Right. You should be able to sell Hollandease sauce in the grocery store, like, I, okay, let's work, let's work backwards. Hollandease sauce should be a dipping sauce like ketchup, mustard, and Hollandease sauce. You should, it should be like, without question, you get Hollandeau sauce. Can I be asking what is Hollandeau?

Oh, it's... Have we never had Hollandeau? It's like Thousand Island, right? No, it's like the French. It's like lemon, butter, and egg. Oh, it's what's on Eggs Benedict? Yes. Oh, yes.

Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Exactly. You know, Gary Ollman? Yes, I do. He has a funny one about Hollandeau sauce where he's explaining this documentary he was watching, and one of them says that they want their Eggs Benedict with Holiday sauce, and he goes,

do you say Holiday sauce or Hollandeau? And it like derails their whole. Do you think that's a real, do you know that joke that I'm talking about? I do. Is that a real documentary where he's talking about like abbreviating all the states into like the two letter? No, no, no. He just made that up. Oh, oh, you're thinking of Gary Goldman.

Gary Goldman. What did I say? Gary Oldman. Who's that? The actor, look up Gary Oldman, you're going to be, this is gonna, I was very confused. The actor, Gary Oldman, he was like, Commissioner Gordon. Wait, did he get, is that the Big Lobowski? No, he's

God, they make him look so ugly He's in Harry Potter He plays Ascombeye. Yeah, Sirius Black. Yeah, serious A renowned British actor. He's a renowned British actor.

He's maybe one of my favorite movie characters of all time. I would not know that that's the guy that played him. He's, yeah, just a very renowned English actor. So I was fascinated by your story. I was like, that sounds very familiar.

And when were you talking to him? Gary Oldman. had a joke, had a bit about holiday, Holliday sauce. Let me get this right. You were talking to Snape about Eggs Benedict. Wait, so

I'm a question about Hollandae sauce. They don't sell that in the grocery? Wait, sorry. Sure, sure, sure. Let's bring it back. I mean, I'm happy to talk about Gary Oldman all day. Danger Taylor Soldier Spy Academy Award nominee, potentially Academy Award winner, not sure, but holiday sauce

it's because you have to it's a very delicate balance and you have to keep it moving keep it moving yeah it literally it it does congeal yeah exactly that's the answer then it's yeah it's sort of like tar fucking things on the

it's exactly right a mixer a mixer a mixer on the table that's why the concrete trucks have the spinning a little mixer on the table yeah on the very rarely very rarely do the

people who have one of America's great ideas get it on camera way. It's like, you package it. Holnays mixer. You package it in a couple double A's in there. And so it's just, you know what I mean? Easy. It's expensive, but sure. No, that doesn't have to be expensive.

It's like a little plastic thing. It's like a wind up car. You spin it. Like you could, you should get them in like a, you know, 50 cents in a, in a machine and it comes out. There's just like, they have to be perpetually spinning or like could, could it have settled and then you just spin it? I think also the dairy may also be initial. so we'll also have to cool it.

Cool. Yeah. Okay, so cooling and mixing. There's a track that goes through the refrigerator section and they're just rolling around. Oh. Moving constantly. You can grab it on its way by and you have to get home with it quickly because it's going to get hot. And yes, every restaurant should have that.

And grocery stores. This is a thing we should be allocating time and money towards. 100% Yeah, that'd take a second. Boom, done. So you said some people have tried to do it though. So you can buy it in the grocery store. Like, fuck.

I know. Great. I was very disappointed, but it doesn't taste the same as when it comes out fresh. It's non-dairy. They've got some preservatives to make it not die. Because they don't sell it in the dairy section. They sell it in the sauce section. Right.

So there's something weird, but like. I think if I was going for milk, I'm like, why is the Holliday sauce over here? There's the one yellow thing in the hole. I'm going to be honest, it never really occurred to me that there's dairy in that. Why is it by the cottage cheese? I was having a barbecue like a month or two ago,

and I ordered on Instacart. I ordered... You perked up at that? Instacart. Yeah, it's not a sponsor. I ordered burgers, cheese, buns, and I wanted to get like burger sauce, and I typed in burger sauce,

and something called Guide Fieri's Flavortown sauce came up, And I was like, yeah, no-brainer. So I put that in the cart. Then I'm getting all these messages from the Instacart guy, like, there's no Flavortown sauce. I can't find Favortown sauce. And I was like, just any burger sauce that he was like, do you want this other Flavortown sauce?

But it was like, no, you're missing the burger sauce. The important part is that it can go on burgers, not that it's Guy Fierre. All this back and forth. I'm like, this was a nightmare. I should have just fucking put ketchup in there. And then when it finally gets there, my buddy was like, oh, I can go grab it.

And he goes and grabs it. And when he comes back, he's like, he handed me the bag and he just said, I got Flavortown. And my buddy didn't know I had gone through all this. He's like, what is that? What is I got Flavortown? Excuse me? That's awesome. And he got the sauce.

And it was really good. I can vouch for that. That's a product I'll stand by. Have you guys ever been to his chicken restaurant, chicken guy? I don't think so. They don't think so. They're, you know how Chick-fil-A's closed on Sundays? Of course.

In the town that I went to college in, there were multiple chicken restaurants that were, like, right next to Chick-fil-A. And my theory was they get the business of kids who go there on Sundays. You're like, oh, fuck, it's Sunday. But I already want chicken, so I'm going to go to, like, chicken guy or whatever. So we went, and his whole thing was, like, sauces.

So there were, like, 20 different sauces. And we had gotten, like, just the tiniest bit high before going there. And all of them are named, like, crazy Guy Fierry things. And so we brought all of them home and tried all of them. And, like, two were good. It was like he's going for like a His whole thing is like to math

Yeah Yeah He only nailed like He hasn't even tried him There's like There's like 20 ingredients Fuck it put it out Put it out! Put it out now

I want it available Peanut Butter Zing It's like that fucking What's that sub place over by Hanano Fat Sal's Yeah Yeah It's the subs are just

It's like It's a soft fest Mozilla sticks, chicken tenders, and pizza. It is like you left a nine-year-old home alone, and you just learned how to use the air fryer. Yeah, I hate the air fryer. What were you saying? What's your favorite movie?

There's that one, the Gary Oldman Holliday sauce. That one's good. The documentary, right? And he says holiday sauce. Bate, yeah, he does that funny scene. I literally was thinking of a scene. I'm like, there's a Gary Oldman scene where he does a... The way, if you thought I was talking about him, I would...

Like, if you were saying that to me, I would think that you were saying you knew him personally. Because, like, when else would he be, like, joking around about... Are you name-dropping Gary Oldman right now? I didn't realize the Harry Potter's, like, all the actors, that's like the, like, dream team. of like English actors. Like I didn't realize that they were all cream of the crime. And you just worked

with Daniel Radcliffe. I did. I did that. Yeah, exactly. That was fucking crazy. Wait. He's like the head AR guy or what is it called?

Like the, the lead in the movie? No, no. Does he like run like a music studio now? Daniel Radcliffe? Yeah. No. You're thinking of Gary Oldman.

Yeah, yeah. You're thinking of Gary. He's got a lot of crazy. He's got a lot of crazy. Cliff or something. Wait, I have a question, what is, sorry, forgive my ignorance. What did you just do with the Han-R-R-A-Lac-Lef? So he, like, are you thinking,

so on my album, he, like, narrated the album. So, like, I kind of, like, tied it together. So he plays this character who's this, like, hyper-academic, like, musicologist character, like, over-explaining all my songs. So fake that. I totally felt, he was like, I'm Dan Radcliffe, I'm head.

Oh, yeah, yeah. You posted, I was like, am I losing my mind? Because I was born you post that. did a video saying that. Yes, yes. He's the music college musicologist in residence. I will say, dude.

He's like a fucking idiot. I was like, that makes sense that Dan Radcloth. He said Dan Radcloth has like a new job. He went back to school. For ethno-musicology. I mean, but that is, that would, you know, he

does have, I would say, the best for like being Harry Potter and being probably like one of the most, it's like, you know, fucking like Mickey Mouse Coca-Cola Harry Potter

like people you could go anywhere in the world he has done whatever the fuck he wants yeah yeah yeah yeah

so if he did go back and study musicology it's like me'd be like is he like a comedy music fan because he did

the weird album movie yeah yeah yeah I and so I like I didn't even think about that

yeah I met him and then he had knew my stuff and then I was like um my baby but then it clicked in my head I was like oh he's like

you know he likes weird out he obviously knows weird out likes comedy music blah blah blah I'm sure people ask you this but what is your relationship with weird out do you have any I did meet he came to my show last year wow wow he was very not a good guy yeah just like cruel you know what I get that vibe

yeah exactly yeah he's like I came off stage he's like actually it was during the set he was like stop stop he yelled from the back who the fuck do you think you are yes exactly you were there I was there Yeah, exactly. I told him to say it. Yeah. You were like, he was nervous to say it.

Your feet of lines all night. You were like, in the car, you're like, you guys say it. Say it. Say it. Yeah, yeah. Why were you in Weird Al riding together? I can't believe. Like, I grew up, like, did you grow up like was, yeah?

I loved him growing up. We had like a VHS tape. I would watch fucking all his music videos all the time. Yeah. But which there were totally DVDs at this point. I don't know. Yeah, I just, we had it on VHS. But was he still releasing?

them on VH? Like he was behind the curve? No, no, no, no. We were behind the curve. This was like in 2012. Yeah, like, I mean, this was legitimately, yeah, 2008 or something. But, uh, but what I can't believe is like he came to L.A. recently and he sold out the forum two nights in a row and the cheapest ticket was like $100,7. Dude, he sold multiple nights at Madison Square Garden. Unbelievable. Dude, he's the fucking man. Yeah, he's just, yeah, like I totally grew up. Yeah, he's the best. He's the best. He's sick. Yeah. I want to be. I, I, I, yeah, I want to go. Do you want to be him? I want to go to a show more realistically.

I prefer that to the, you wanting to be him. I was a, well, I'd like to be in a skin, too. I'd like to try that, you know, have those. I just want to smell him right a little bit. A whiff? Perhaps a whiff. Yeah. What do you think he smells like?

You probably know. What does he smell like? Mm. I have to cast my mind back to, it was all such a blur. Ask yourself. Yeah, it's like that. One of those movies where they're trying to like pull out of suppressed. Sorry, I have to have to go so with you guys.

And actually when this happens, it really hurts. Ah, piss. Yeah, yeah, exactly. B-O. He's one of those guys that I feel like I would be, I would be shocked if he smelled great. I feel like he probably, no, yeah. Like, no, I don't picture him with like a smell.

Like if you were like, you know, weird else, Weird hell's cologne is like really subtle. Weird hell smells great. Yeah. I, uh, yeah, he, um, he smelled very neutral. Neutral. Yeah. Which is, yeah.

That's what I go for. Yeah. What more could you ask? Do you wear a clone? A touch. Okay. Because he does it. I don't do any of that.

A touch. A whisper. He can't, can you sell? A whisper. I put some of this morning. I think I put too much on this morning. I'm wearing a lot of smells. You do, but you, so you do wear.

Corona virus. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I, uh, I, I, I got a, I, I got a, years worth of soap in the mail the other day. Pretty excited about that. That's wonderful. How big is that bar? I have to go down to the back.

You're rubbing yourself on it. Yeah, exactly. This was a horrible decision. You do not want to see how I get my ass. A long bar of soap. In the latter three months, it's great. Exactly. It gets down to a really reasonable size kind of around.

It's carved into like, yeah, like your, the shape of your body is what, yeah. It's really comfy, actually, about month six. Wait, what do you mean you got a years worth of soap? 12 bars. Oh, nice. You're a bars person? I am now. Ah.

So I bought this whole thing. I bought 12. That's like the whole deal. That's the reason you're here. Like, it's the bar's got. It's kind of, it ranks his all. Epic toilet man. Bar soap.

I'm glad I like it because I like I told you I bought a year's worth of it So you bought a year's worth of it I thought this was like a PR package Yeah I did too I would I'd be in a pretty sticky situation if I didn't like it Is it like nice? Yeah

And you were prompted by which element of it Appealed to you the soap itself or you were like I'm working backwards from I need a year's worth of it And what's the best vessel to deliver? I need a year's worth of something. Then I landed on soap. Then I landed on bar soap. Then I landed on this brand.

No, I had bought cologne from this company. And I was so excited about the cologne that I was like, I need something else from them. And their, my body wash game was kind of trash for a little bit. And it felt like, I didn't feel, I felt like not clean after the body wash. Like I feel like I'm dirty. Thank you. It took me 15 seconds to come up with you. Not clean.

There's got to be a word for this, right? But so I'm pretty stoked on it. I got like a new soap holder, like a dick. How much you paint him. Bringing a girl back and she's like, love your place. When I use the restroom, there's a guy in a tuxedo. Could the shower, soap holder, step out for a second?

There is a guy in, there's an impeccably dressed guy in your shower, and he told me that you're paying him to be there. And he is soaking wet. So I have good news and I have bad news. The good news is the soap holder is still there. Bad news is you forgot to turn the shower off. He's freezing. It's so great.

He's freezing. I told you about when I used to work at the barbecue restaurant, And I had a co-worker that got fired because he got his dick caught in the pickle slicer. Yeah. The pickle slicer got fired too. Yeah. That's good. That's something.

That's awesome. That's what my dad always tells. That rule. So that was sort of the bones behind the soap holder joke. Right. A little peek behind the curtain. Yeah, exactly. It's all...

Comedy's all derivative. Comedy stuff. It's really just, you know. A few moves you do and yeah. I do that type of thing. I was upset at that because I was like, we have had a podcast for like two years. That is a phenomenal story.

You're just telling me this now. Great. Oh my God. All right. Should we do our like drafts and stuff? Well, I feel like we could hear a pitch submission if you're down. Yeah. We have our listeners submit business.

So we do business pitches, which we hadn't briefed you on, but you had a good one. So now we can hear one from them. Beautiful. Yeah. And we will be like sort of the sharks, if you will. So they, so they hooked, Andrew hooked it up. So like, we're playing on the TV outside. And I didn't realize that.

So I was in the kitchen. And I heard Andrew like on a hot mic out there. And he just goes, every confession is about pooping yourself or peeing yourself. Just like walking around the studio, like very upset. Yeah. We're kind of known as a poop. Yeah, aren't we like fucking under surveillance now? We are yeah, yeah, we put like a flock cameras In our office yeah, and there's a big LED wall outside the yeah, yeah, that's just out on the street

Yeah, I'm recording our conversations. It's unbelievable. Yeah, I mean I guess I guess this is fine yeah, are you okay being on camera right now? Is this but you're this is being filmed as well? Yeah, yeah, oh my god Well, I'll talk to my publicist. Yeah, I thought we I think I think I think I'm gonna I thought you guys just wanted to get to know me. What's the worst part about drinking with a big group, especially one with people you aren't super close with? Oh, man. They don't want to, they're not drinking at the same pace as you and your friends.

Yes. And so you have to now slow down because your, your friend's friends are not really looking to party. And now you're like, this is a boring group. Or it's like, let's get a pitcher. And then it's like something you don't want to drink. Oh, yes. Oh.

The pitcher is... I hate a pitcher. The pitcher only works if it's like you and your two buddies and you're all aligned. Yes. And we're all going to drink the same thing and we're going to drink at the same pace. And if it's a night where you're feeling good, something good happened and you're like, hey, I'm, you know, maybe later in the night I might be buying people's shots. It's like one of those kind of nights where I'm like, free, loose.

If that, if anything less than that vibe is happening and there's pitchers even being discussed, I'm like, just let me get what I want to get. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I agree. Because then you feel like weird, like, I know I have... He hasn't finished his, but I want more. And if everyone else is doing the picture, and then you're the one who's like, actually,

I'm going to get three shots to myself and go cry to sleep. A cosmo. Yeah. The hell is that? What the hell even is that? I've only had one in my life, and it was pre-made in a hotel room.

It was on the rocks bottles. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, God. Was that when you cleared out the mini bar in Louisiana? I showed up to a business, meeting. It was the one week after I'd

graduated college, was alone in a hotel room, got really bored, drank the entire mini bar, showed up to a business meeting at a dinner, was holding it together. The client

ordered espresso martinis and that set me over the edge and like a borderline almost fell asleep to my dinner. Correct me from our I believe we lost the brand deal. We lost the, yeah.

We did not, we did not, we did not. We did not earn their business. The problem was we had already signed the deal. It was that bad that we were like, they were like, you know what, never mind. Well, you were under the table.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. It was one of those under the table deals. I thought it was an underdistance. All right, go ahead. All right, that's right. You're worried you're going to get way more drunk than the rest of the group and embarrass yourself. You have a few bruise while watching football.

And bam, you were eight deep when that indeed was not. the plan. Well, here's the solution. A digital attachment that goes on your case of beer that locks and unlocks your access according to the vibe of the room. Its vibe sensing technology is one of a kind and will be patented. It is face ID so no one can see if you are locked out or not, nor do they see how many beers are gone. It gives you a one beer warning so you know not to drink the one in your hand too fast and be drinkless like a fool. The screen may even have fun and encoring catchphrases like wham or pow or wow or like way to crush that beer champ run wild with it i'm very skeptical of this idea yeah very very very very skeptical of the like technology or of the

premise general idea here's why because you are not giving yourself or those in the room i don't want to be a slave to the vibe of the room give have confidence in yourself that you You can be the one to, you can, one choice, one joke, one silly, you know, like, oh, I have my shirt off now, vibe is completely different. Yeah. And well-timed, well-placed, there's no possible, if that, it needs to also sense your own vibe and then calibrate and really do some moneyball shit and just really be calibrating what you're capable of that evening and then also what the room is capable of. is one fatal flaw with this in that the vibe is going to be pretty bad if you locked me out of my case of

it. No one's getting any more beer. If I'm locked out and we're in a sticky situation. Fuck off. Fuck off. That made me think that like a sketch about like it's money ball but it's like a guy like he's like ducking in and he's like I've had like five

and I'm worried and he's like all right well here's what you do. Like talk to this guy, get this drink. Like it's like with the fucking whiteboard. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, we've just been going off like, you know, old, you know, you're like, whatever the equivalent of, like, the old scout, like, yeah, yeah, don't listen to the bar fly. You got, you need a short autistic man to tell you how to.

He only had two chicken tenders today. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I haven't figured out, like, the nitty gritty of it because I just thought of it. Right. But when he get there. I like, do you like that he gets on bass scene, but with, like, like, like a local, it's like the local drunk. Like a guy in like a cable mitt sweater and they're like,

oh maybe it's like organizing a crew for the night out. Yeah, yeah, yeah. This is Will De Nellenlin. They're like, do you know why everyone at this bar loves him? He gets on base. Yeah, yeah. He's not gonna, bring the house down, but he's not gonna pass out

or throw up. Yeah, this on base. He's gonna have eight beers, drive himself home. Yeah, it's like, this is your older brothers, this is your friends older brothers like an unemployed guy like who like yes he like

is an alcoholic and then like may like you know he may be up for three days before the night but like the league has counted him out but actually if deployed on the well like a specific evening we plug him Jeremy Gioca he will call every Uber

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Let's get back into the episode. Should we do This Guy Rocks? I have a guy. Yeah. Okay, yeah. So, Kyle, this guy rocks is an opportunity for us to show each other, maybe a guy or a girl that we've seen on the internet who rocks. Oh, okay, sweet.

And it, uh, and it's, okay. Would you guys prefer, I'll give you two options. Yeah. Would you prefer bouncy castle or a band drummer? Marching band drummer. Bouncy Castle or, uh, orching band? I want a hybrid. Is that crazy?

Like all the tubas are bouncing and shit? I just, you know, I feel like my instinct says bouncy castle, but I'm, I'm curious about marching band drummer. Okay. You're going to like marching band drummer. Let's, let's try this one on for size. This is a high school band. I believe it is half time. And their drummer has a unique approach to the position.

I already fucking love it. Yes. What the hell? Imagine the guy who's spinning, explaining to his parents' friends what he does in the marching band. I'm so chimp. spin the drum. Timmy, you're in the marching band, right? Yeah, yeah, what instrument? Well, kind of instrument adjacent.

You ever see one of those wheels that spins the drummer? I love that. I love that. Oh, I would die laughing when he started throwing up. This makes my show look like fucking open mic night. This is fucking great. You should have your drummer. Oh, my God. I mean, it's not even a question.

It's just like, I'm slacking. Don't show that to your drummer. You won't be able to leave the house. You can't be like the athletic director and pitch that. It has to come from the drummer. They were like, just let Brian set up his lights. He like slowly, he like slowly kind of like convinces the drummer to, he leads the drummer to this place on his own.

But remember, you said you wanted to enhance the production value. You remember Brian? You were saying you want to bring a little bit more showmanship. You're a big Motley crew fit. You know, Motley Cruz drummer used to go in a steel cage and spin upside down. It's just something to think about. I said I wanted a turn at being the drummer. I didn't want to turn while being the drummer. Yeah, you don't get the full audio. They don't have the like live audio. He's like, help

He has to do it. He's keeping perfect time But he's like stop I know He goes down and does some like great fills He's just so perfectly straight Do my my sisters in the marching band in high school and played the flute and later admitted that like she would get so focused on the marching part that she just wasn't playing the flute at all but like who cares but she would also like wear pajamas under her band outfit because apparently it was really they're really uncomfortable

and one game the her pajama leg like popped out so she had this like pink thing and she got reamed out it was like it was like quite honestly bigger a bigger deal in my household than like september 11th she was not by your parents no no by like the band director but like She was devastated. That is like, that goes against everything I've learned about your parents. She's like, turn the TV off. I don't care what's going on.

We need to talk. It was on 9-11. Yeah, yeah, exactly. Can I actually, can you pull up, speaking of drummers and this guy rocks? So Iggy Pop, have you heard of the pop? Yeah, yeah.

So in his first band, this was like when they were teenagers in the 60s band, they were like trying to come out with a way to stand out, and he was the drummer. and so their idea was just to have the tallest drum set and just look up like tallest drum set. Yeah, there it is on the left. That's kind of sick.

Oh, the drum set is just up high. So they're playing at, like, oh, the drums were really big. No, they would just, like, play at, like, their high school, and then he would just be up there for no reason. That actually seems like, don't you, like, kind of look to the drummer a lot of times for, like, the pacing of the show? Yeah, you're like... Yeah, the acoustics were crazy.

That's awesome. Yeah. I sent you on me. Can you imagine being the fucking, like, janitor at his high school and being like, he needs scaffolding for, exactly. No, you know what?

No, he doesn't get fucking scaffolding. At my school for like a spirit week thing one time, we would have like a theme and we'd like decorate our part of the, whatever. And I was really into it. And we built a like six or seven foot tall Trojan horse out of wood. Like my buddy's like, uncle helped us build it. And we like, because we were like doing a Spartan theme or whatever.

And I could fit inside of it. it was pretty sick. That's awesome. But then after the thing, when we were breaking down and like cleaning everything up, the janitor came by and he was like, what are you going to do with that horse? And I was like, I guess I don't really know. Like you want it? And he was like, yeah, I'd like it for my birds.

I was like, you have birds? He's like, yeah, yeah, can I have that for my birds? It was like, by all means. So he took, the janitor took it for his birds. But I'm just like, I guess like a bird cage. After, yeah, after he's leaving, you're like, you're walking home. You're like, I mean, what is it? What are the birds going to do with it?

I probably should have followed up and asked, before I gave it to him, what is he going to do to the birds? It was maybe like eight feet tall and eight feet long or something? Maybe he has like... Like, I could, as a full human fit in the like belly of it and had legs and like a neck and stuff. Maybe he had like an ostrich. I was pretty... It was just a costume. I want to dress my...

My bird would love this. I was thinking like he's putting everyone in the bed. How big is the bird? It keeps them all in the belly or something? Yeah. I don't know. Anyway, Mr. Paisley was his name. I hope he's doing well

The neighbors We'll call the police on me again I've So I've gotten We have possums In our yard And I've gotten in this rabbit hole And TikTok of people

Domesticating them Wow Apparently they don't really carry rabies Very often at all These look That seems like That the way you said that was a guy Who's about to get into it

And he's kind of planting seeds What you've heard about What you may have heard about them leading up to this point? Or it could be wrong. You know, most of the time they're not carrying that much rape. I've read it's like,

legitimately, I went down a rabbit hole and I was on the Reddit thread for opossums this morning. And, uh... Do you say opossum? Yeah, I think it's interchangeable. It can be opossum or possum. Like with an O.

It's almost like the plural coes at the front. It's like, opossum is multiple. I thought you don't say the O. Oh, right there you go. Different animals. Oh. Both are

but they refer to two completely different animals. Both can be used interchangeably, but one is right and one is wrong. Right. What I'm dealing with is an O possum then. Yeah. Okay. I'm going to be honest, the possum kind of looks like not a possum. The possum kind of looks like a chinchilla.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I was going to say, I went down the rabbit hole on Reddit, and there's very much a sense in the possum community that there's sort of an unfair stigma around them and that they would have rape. Right. I think also the fact... Is that why people don't like them? Well, they go...

Yeah. I was more... Yeah. But I'm kind of more... Also, their tails are gross. Yeah. I hate... And they...

So they click at night? I've told you about this. But they do this thing that's like a maiden call or something. They go like... But it's at an irregular pattern. And I keep my window open at night because I don't have air conditioning. And so every night I was waking up and I didn't know that possums did that. And I was like, I thought like a homeless guy was like, fucking...

I thought a homeless guy was like... clicking around. I went to the yard with pepper spray and it was a possumizer. My flashed on and the guy stayed right out of me like, fuck. Damn it. So pretty much these are just like hideous nightmare creatures who do like Chinese water torture and barely have rabies.

Yeah, they barely. It's actually they're pretty, yeah. People are like, I get into it. It's not a fair reputation. But I don't know. It could be fun. They're already around. So I figured maybe like if I wore like long sleeves and gloves,

I might try to like pet one. Yeah. Yeah, if you go to someone's a house and they're like, oh, yeah, here's my opossum, he's a rescue. He's a rescue. Yeah, I figured. We're trying to adopt, not shop. Where would you shop? We were walking to the bar when I was like a sophomore in college and there's like this kind of long like brick road that goes from campus to like the main Irish pub and there were like all these bushes on the side.

and my buddy was kind of like 50 yards ahead of us and kind of like fucking around in this one bush and we're like, what is he doing up there? And when we got there, he was holding up possum by the same. Jesus, what was his vibe as a guy that would prompt him to do that? Uh, shit. Shout out Seamus Gavin. Shameless Gavin.

Shameless Gavin. He, this was kind of a, this was on par. Sure. This was like a, I didn't know what he was going to have when we got up there, but possum was like in the top. Possum was like a leader in the clubhouse option. I hope he's doing, he actually, I know he's doing well, talk to him the other day, but I hope you're,

I hope you're still doing one. Hunting possums. Did you get briefed on these like drafts we do? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, sweet. Are you down to give it a go? Yeah, I, I'm, we'll see how I did, yeah. Well, if you did bad, um, yeah.

You did bad, though, none of the episode comes out. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We scrap all that. we'll replace you with Jeff Gordon. Yeah. We'll get the, we'll get Jeff Gordon. I don't, is. He's waiting.

He's outside. Like, yeah, if I don't do well, yeah, yeah, yeah. We actually got boat. Yeah, yeah, yeah. All right, should we start off with the country songs? Let's do it, buddy. Do you want, do you want your guitar?

You want to play the guitar? Oh, fun. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah. Let's give it to go. Yeah, yeah. All right, these are more country songs that don't exist. Wine shaft.

It's about a bunch of coal miners who, after their shift at the mine shaft is done, they have a wine tasting club, and they go down there and they turn it into a wine shaft. Oh, that's really nice. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, do you want to sing that one or no? He's not usually as eager? Actually, maybe let's not do the country songs one this time. Can I pitch you on?

Yeah. I should have tracked her. This is about a guy who let a girl get away. Ooh, yeah. And he wishes that he had pursued her. Oh, yeah. Sort of like, um... On foot.

Sorry, on foot. Yeah, yeah. Nope, on foot. On his tractor. All right. Yeah. Should have pursued her on foot. There we go.

Sorry, he should have pursued her on his tractor, I think was the whole point. All right. I should attract her. Yeah, yeah. All right. All right. She was heading down the road. Saw her from behind.

I knew that she wasn't one. I had to have her. I had to know that she was coming home with me. But I never. need to know what she's doing after. I shouldn't have let her go. What was this song? I should have tractor.

I should have tractor. I should have tractor. In my tractor. I should have tractor in my tractor. I should have tractor. I should have tracked her down. I'm going to keep on driving my tractor till I find her again again I should have tracked that woman down track tractor in my tractor

that's got a beautiful all right there we go all right we've been working on that for like six seven months uh yeah yeah yeah well it started actually during COVID yeah exactly right it was like well that's when you were like I can't I can't keep doing this room Goldberg nine to five I'm Goldberg down yeah I got to get out of this mess all right you got one all right yeah Mine are, uh... All right, let's see. All right. This one was just called Namibian woman.

Okay, yes. Yeah, yeah. Like the country? Yeah, like the country. Country songs. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's fun. Exactly.

That took me a second. All right. Same chords. Namibian woman. That's the country you're from. Namibian woman Have my son That's great

I got We go one Boot in my boots It's about having a guy goes out And he hits the town a little too hard He wakes up in the morning He's dealing with all the stuff he did And he threw up in his cowboy boots

Oh that's fun So there's boot in your boots You want to try it? All right I think so All right We'll get it That sounds like Yeah

yakin in my socks Pukin in my hand Throwing up every day Just like I planned I know I'm country Down to my roots Motherfucker I'm booting in my boots

That's awesome There we go That was good That was my Alright now we're cooking Now I'm cooking Now I'm cooking Yeah we're going

This one is called Corn for a cot This is a guy who can't find his way home So he decides to sleep in the cornfield. Corn for a cot? Yeah, like I'll make, like I'm using corn for a cot, like a bed. We don't, yeah, yeah, yeah, I'll spare you on this.

Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah, that's all, yeah. I mean, it's, there's a masterpiece there. Well, you know, I thought it was like a guy was going to trade corn for somewhere to sleep. Yeah. Oh, like, that could work. Sure. Fuck, that's so much better. Fuck.

Here's just a rant. This is just a country, you said country songs that don't exist. And this definitely doesn't exist. This one's called the 1995 Tokyo Subway Saran Gas Attack Yeah

Oh my God, yeah Yeah That's totally, yeah 1999 Tokyo Tokyo subway Saran gas attack Some Japanese men

lost their lives that day In the taring gas attack Om Shinrikio was the cult Their leader he was brave But he had to put those businessmen in their graves Is that a real thing Yeah, it's the 1995 Tokyo subway serengass attack Oh my god

That sounds awful I would never go to that Yeah yeah do not It's way overhiked Yeah Grasshopper It's a guy's dating a girl who likes to smoke weed and every time he runs out of weed,

she just moves on to the next guy that has weed. Like, how immediate? Like, the second it's empty. She doesn't even let him buy more. Got it, got it, yeah. She's a grasshopper. I like that. Oh, yeah, that's good.

Yeah, yeah. Whoever has weed. Oh, that's good. That's good. That's good. I actually don't have any more. Well, I had one, good, because I had one more. I don't know if we, just for,

I don't want to get this video, uh, copyright, but I, I want to do a cover. Can I do a cover? Yeah, I don't. We make no money. Okay, great. All right, here we go. This is a country cover. Okay. All right.

Well, let me get in that to-to-be. Let me get in that beep-to-be. Running her hands through my fro. Bouncing on them 24 singing, let me get in that tut-to-to-le. Let me get in that beep-to-be. I forget the rest. It's the remix to ignition. Hot and fresh out the kitchen.

Mama rolling that body, got every man in here wishing. She's sipping on coke and rum. I'm like so what I'm drunk. It's the freaking weekend. Baby, I'm about to have me some fun. Well, let me give him that to do. That is beautiful. That's amazing.

I've never really thought about the lyrics. What does that mean? I was like, wait, what is this? I was like, oh, I know this song? There's a, you know, catfish and the bottlement? Sounds familiar. They're like an Australian band. And they have, you know, like, Triple J, you know, like, it's like a radio station

Australia and like artists will go do covers on there. Oh, yeah. And they do, uh, read my mind. That's a guy who does like, pooh. Right? Like he does the sound. That's Dumbledore. That's Baltimore.

Oh, maybe, yeah, I don't know. But they, uh, anyway, the catfish and bobbing on, they went on. did read my mind by the killers. And then at the end, they do like, they like sing a verse of that. Oh, the Archelope song? Oh, yeah, yeah. You should check it out. That's cool. That is, that is a banger.

Yeah. I think we crushed that. Beautiful. All right, you got some sayings that don't exist as well? Yep, yep. All right, let's do it. You want to introduce it, Jack? These are more sayings that don't exist.

All right. Singing with the shower off. It's like, your buddy. who won't put himself out there even though he's really talented, it's like, dude, you gotta start singing with the shower off. Got it.

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. He only sings in the showers. That's great. Start singing with the shower off. I like that. Yeah. I did these in a very, this is the way I write,

really, this is just how I write music in the sense that I went for, really went for mouth feel. Yeah, yeah. Let's find out what they mean afterwards. Right, because there's, you know, we're gonna work backwards. I'll be honest, that's usually how

I was in the shower and I came up with that. All right. And they're all very southern, I feel like. Couldn't lick a beef steak with a heap of dipping sauce. That's good. That's good. Which of course. Of course.

Yeah. A guy. He's about to crack how to get Hollandeau sauce into the grocery sauce. You know, it's like, yeah, that classic feeling. No, it's like you should be there, but you're not. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Right?

Like should be. at a place? Yeah, or like with someone or at someone's side. Yeah, yeah. Why isn't he with her when she's in the hospital? It's like, yeah, man, couldn't like a beefsteak with a heap of dipping sauce. Yeah, that's pretty good, yeah, yeah. Nice. Okay, great. Thank you.

Thank you. Of course. At the buffet without an appetite. It's a guy who has so much available to him, but he's not taking advantage of it. So he maybe has advantages in life that he's just not really interested. I like that a lot. That's very good. That's very good.

playing the wrong piano. This is when you are, you know, kind of tickling the incorrect ivory, the proverbial keys. Yeah. Nice. Yeah, it's like, sorry, I'm better. Playing the wrong piano is playing the wrong piano. It's when you are using someone else's work to create something, an output that gets. gives you a claim.

Plagerism? Plagiarism. Okay, sweet. All right. Play your own piano. Play your own piano. Play your own piano. Okay.

You use your own... Play your own piano. That's good. Okay, ready? That's good. We're gonna probably, because we're just for the clip. Play your own piano.

Use your own skill set to create things. Don't rely on other people. Come on, dude. Play you on piano. Don't be derivative. Yeah. Yep. Bingo.

Boom. We got there. All right. are getting increasingly demented. All right. Couldn't nick a hen hatch with a rotary blade. What is a rotary blade? It's like a propeller.

Or like a, it's like a rotary blade on like a table saw. Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's your friend. Yeah. Oh, but that's kind of like couldn't hit the broad sign of a barn. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But it's like a funner way to say that. Yep.

And it's like, you're trying to do real damage. It's like couldn't hit the broadside of a barn made you can't throw, but like couldn't nick a hen hatch with a rotary blade. Of course. Is like you're trying to like really get someone and you're just not even close. Yeah. The pick scab never heals. If you don't give yourself time to move on and you keep rehashing these things, you're never going to get over something that happened. That's a banger.

Thank you. You guys are good at this. Well, trust me, it gets worse. Blaming a muffin for murder. Okay. If you're going to try to get out of something, at least come up with a good excuse. That's fantastic. I like that.

That's really good. Like the alliteration. All right. Yeah. I mean, all right. Couldn't sell a sneeze. Okay. Couldn't sell a sea snake to a sand maiden.

That's pretty good. Yeah, it's like you can't sell your best. Yeah. Bad salesman. How would she ever want that? Yeah, yeah, exactly. Yeah. Or no, she does want that.

Because she's a sand made. It's like, yeah. Right. It's like, yeah, you know what I mean? Like she, that's her, like, that's her bread and water. That's her world. Sandmaidens, of course. Yeah, there's like, they're just like living with sea snakes and see anemone and, you know, that's kind of their whole world.

See an enemy is like their whole world. Exactly. Exactly. Right. Like, Nino. Right. Nino. Finding Nino.

I don't know what the fuck you wake up in like a parallel universe everything's the same but for some reason it's finding Neino now you're like yeah yeah yeah yeah movie but I'm not crazy it was it was definitely Nemo everything about the movie is exactly

exactly it's just finding Neino Dornie okay can't put until you're on the green. Some things you need to just do it. You need to do it the right way.

You can't skip the steps. Don't get ahead of yourself. Gotta wait for some things to come to you. That's a skydiving reference. Of course. Of course. I'm tapped. Yeah, I'm pretty much tapped too. It sounds like you got something. You got something. Well, no, I mean, there's one, I realize

in one of my songs, it's I have like a British rap song and I was like, oh, I kind of have one. And I'm using the word Nick in the British sense now, meaning to steal. So couldn't nick a hot pot pie off me nan. That's a good one. So like you're weak, you can't. Yeah, yeah, yeah, you're like so weak.

Yeah, yeah. Right. I like, you're bad thief. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, you're clumsy. You're like a bad, like a weak gangster. Yeah, you know what I mean? Oh, exactly. Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, and gangs and gangland shootings. Gangland, gang affiliated murders and crimes. Have you ever done or been in any? Not gang affiliated. Any gang or? No, nothing, yeah. Nothing gang affiliated. New York.

Nice. The city. Yeah, the part, the part with all the gangs, but I've managed to stay out of all that. That's great. That's great. That's awesome. Yeah. Lucky, lucky.

Yeah. Well, I think that's all we got. Yeah. But thank you so much, Kyle. This has been awesome having you here. Thank you for having you here. Thank you for having me. We've had a blast.

What a joy. Where can people find you on the road? I am on tour and just put out a new album and Kyle Gordon is great.com or Kyle Gordon is great on all socials so yeah oh yeah thank you so much playing at the roxy tonight tonight yeah this comes out in 45 minutes right yeah yeah comes out monday so where are you on monday really comes out monday yeah oh great uh monday you'll almost be in portland oregon yeah so actually um yeah i've got a lot more tour left so the east coast uh run is almost sold out so get

those tickets if you can uh and then um yeah Portland Seattle Vancouver Boise Kansas city Missouri, but I'm going to be driving through Kansas. That'll be my 50th state I've visited. So I will have visited all 50 states. Thank you. That's very cool. Thank you. And that's what I'm here to promote actually. Yeah. The 50 state. The 50 state. Yeah, exactly. Yeah.

It's like the lifetime 50 state achievement. Oh, and you're going to Warringdale. Yes, I am. Warringdale, PA. Dreams come true. Well, are you from Pennsylvania? Lancaster. Yeah, yeah. I actually don't know where Warringdale is. It's pretty much Pittsburgh. It's pretty much Pittsburgh. Okay. I think, I hate, I hate, like, when you book shows. they'll like label it as like

Pittsburgh yeah well like it's like it's Pittsburgh but like technically it's in Warringdale I did a show in Orlando they're like uh where was it it was um we were just there yeah uh winter park winter park exactly that's where he went to college really yeah where'd you go to school

Rollins college oh he went there I didn't go there I couldn't get it we went to the Rollins of Massachusetts which of course is UMass Amherst Clause. Boston College. Are you actually from New York, though?

Yeah, Westchester. Oh, nice. Okay, very cool. Yeah, so like our 15 minutes north of the city. Nice. I've been there once. Westchester? Yeah, my buddy Alex Golden.

Where's he from? Well, I think he's actually maybe from, I want to say from Rye. Oh, yeah, yeah, right there, but. Yeah. Westchester's the county. Oh, got it. Sort of a square is a rectangle or rectangle. I have a pair of his shorts that I wear sometimes,

and they say Westchester Warriors on it. Lacrosse shorts. Oh, that was probably, he was probably good then. Yeah, I mean, I don't know. He didn't play in college, but I guess. Okay. Sorry, I didn't play for the Warriors. I was just a regular kid with regular dreams.

Warriors. That holds like so much. Like, Kyle completely changes his to be at first. I'm so sorry for being so silly earlier. It's been, it's, I'm really, you guys did not have to have me on. I mean, really, I mean, if there's anything I can do for you guys, seriously, just let me know. If your friend needs anything. Anything.

Anything. You know Alex Golden? He had eight goals our senior. That's fantastic. All right, Kyle, thank you so much. Guys, we'll see you on Wednesday. Love you. Bye, guys.

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