Will & Rusty's Playdate - men yearn to dig

Episode Date: July 9, 2025

Will talks about his idol, and Rusty gives pointers on how to get the ladies to talk to your friend. Plus, Lauren rehashes some sister beef, and Willy reveals what would actually land him on the Forbes 30 Under 30 list. The boys also get into jock itch, aura-farming boat racers, and the time they went buckwild at a bar in Amherst, MA. Finally, they draft more MrBeast videos and Curb Your Enthusiasm plots that don’t exist (yet). FOLLOW OUR SOCIALS: https://www.flowcode.com/page/playdatepod SHOP OUR MERCH: https://playdatepod.shop/ RUSTY’S SONGS OF THE DAY: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/2e5sF4pBj2HBZDoMhymnNf?si=w38C4sjDT6i4OIXq9f_eSg SUPPORT OUR SPONSORS: GRAB A REFRESHING TWISTED TEA TODAY https://www.twistedtea.com/ YOUR NEW WARDROBE AWAITS! GET 20% OFF @CHUBBIES WITH THE CODE PLAY AT https://www.chubbiesshorts.com/play #chubbiespod 00:00 Intro 04:56 Weekend Recap 09:16 The Coolest Bar in LA 14:38 Forbes 30 Under 30 20:55 Nostalgic Movies 24:49 Finders, keepers 41:29 International Travel 46:08 A little over-served 53:07 Crabs 01:00:16 Roadmap/Pitch Submissions 01:11:52 Pitches 01:20:16 AITA 01:22:58 This Guy Rocks 01:30:20 Teach Me Something 01:33:40 Drafts #AlmostFriday #FridayBeers #PlaydatePod Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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are we recording played it episode 121 ladanian tomlinson tomlinson tomlinson that's what that was this is my moment sorry you stole you know he's my goat i know he's your goat isn't your password to everything or not that it's another it's a different guy it actually is a different guy but oh i know it's a he's my hero growing up it's a hockey guy okay stop but i did love ladanian tomlinson growing up he was my hero what did you like about him i liked he would score a lot of touchdowns and he would jump i liked at the one yard line he would always like they would give him the ball and he would leap like do like ladanian tomlinson jump he would leap like crazy in the air okay well you told me your own twist on it you told me the right

leap i said no he did it's fine it's just fun i swear you said it's just gonna be like harder images look at images just look at images oh yeah yeah yeah look at that shit and that oh that's cool i had like i had his car his like card and it was that first film i had his car i had his car a car set and he would jump really high it was just cool he was a man

those old Chargers jerseys were the coolest and I remember there was like some like there was some like thing where he gave

like TVs to people during wildfires in California like recently? no no no like years and years ago when I wrote

I had to write an essay as part of my application like my high school you had to like get accepted to and so there was like an essay portion in person

and like you didn't know what the prompt was going to be and it was like who's your i get there and it's like who's your idol and why and i wrote it all about linday and donaldson and like half of it was about how he gave like tvs to people during wildfires i don't know man and my mom was i remember my mom being like how is that helping it was like so they could see the news yeah yeah yeah oh yeah so they can they can see where it's

coming from like i guess that was there's something about he gave tvs and i got into the school so you're helping you're you're doing something right yeah but it's your heart's in the right place but you're not doing it the right way yeah i don't know why i was house burnt down i was like he's a good guy too he's a great player and he's a good guy he gave people tvs when their houses were on fire all the other like kids are writing their essays about like you know physicists and no like their their dad i bet they were all like the chargers running back i bet it stood out in that sense i bet they were all fucking about like thomas jefferson or something yeah yeah like whoever was like hot back then was he hot back then charlie tj in 2015 2013 wait why did you

like him if he was on the chargers what's the i it's the worst story of all time it's actually i had i didn't become a jets fan until college because i was so sick of telling the story i was a mets fan more than more than anything and i loved mike piazza growing up and he got traded to the San Diego Padres or left in free agency or something I don't know he went to the Padres moved your whole fandom to San Diego so I started liking the Padres for like a season and then I asked my dad and I was like what's the San Diego is there a San Diego football team he's like yeah the Chargers I was like all right I like the Chargers and I very quickly went back to the Mets but that when that happened then I started watching the Chargers and it was when Dane

Tomlinson was like he was he has I think he still has the record for the most touchdowns in a season like he was jumping out he was the fucking man and so it was a good it was if there was ever a time to shift your focus towards san diego that was probably yeah it was like i tried i think i tried the padres was like no i'm also like the mets was like my dad really cared about the mets like the jets was never as big of a thing and uh they just got new jets tickets for christmas and you're like i'm a chargers fan now they're like what i had the lt i used to go to game like games anytime they're on these lt jersey at antonio camardi jersey i was super into the charges and then i was going to college i was like this is fucking embarrassing to be like i liked mike

piazza when i was four that's why i'm a chargers fan i like me i like mike piazza so much that when he got traded to the padres i became a chargers fan like yeah it's if you told mike piazza that he would he would be like what no don't you don't need to do that so yeah and then i my dad had given me like some cool like vintage jet stuff and i was like i just need to get my story i'm going to college i'm moving from south carolina to boston like i can rewrite my story yeah now was my chance and also the chargers and jets were both horrible so it was like i'm not no one's gonna accuse me of coming in like a bandwagon you know yeah so i switched and i um i've never looked back although now and then of course in cruel irony as they say i move here and i live

15 minutes from the chargers stadium now it's like now it would be pretty fucking fun to be a chargers fan yeah yep so i still have a soft spot how was everyone's long weekend honestly goaded yeah it was pretty good yeah it was pretty good what'd you guys do for the fourth i went to this like pool party in malibu it was so cool nice it was like one of the nicest it was might be the nicest home i've ever been whose house was it you scored an invite listen i'm not i'm not i ain't putting anyone on blast but i scored an invite i made new friends is he famous no no no i just feel like i thought you would be like yeah i don't want to be like googling this person yeah but i met scott and i made a friend we made randomly met a guy at a bar a few weeks ago that

a few months ago that we just hit it off with we've started hanging out with and he invited us to his girlfriend's house for the fourth and it was the it was it was baller it was baller beautiful beautiful house like cool like pool overlooking like the water pickleball court but it was also very uh which we we kind of knew this going in it was very intimate it was like a friend group and then us we were like the only people who were like new guys you guys show up like your face painted yeah red white and blue yeah yeah oh okay all right but it was fun clearly clearly if you got the invite like they were comfortable with having new guys there so i feel like that's a compliment yeah we knew that they kind of that was clear you know going

into it that was clarified and uh it was great it was really really fun it was beautiful and uh but it was a lot it was the then we came back here and there's like a thing it's Friday night it was the longest day of all time I saw Will for like a like five minutes oh yeah so I learned for five minutes where were you guys uh at this house they were at someone's like pre-game oh oh oh nice it was like after I'd yeah we I was with my sister Jane was Jane is actually still here right now she's at dog town right now she was i asked her if she wanted to come say hi but she was like or like pop it on the pod for five minutes but she didn't want to but nervous nervous that stings a little bit but uh sam got sam got a table at waterfront for the fourth of july okay sounds

i was kind of like that's not it feels like a crazy move a little it was i was not on board i didn't see the i didn't see the vision and then people were gonna stay back and grill at sam's and so i was kind of trying to figure out which one i was going to do we went to waterfront the back was like completely quiet which was nice it was just like yeah whatever but outside where the grass patio is and everything was an absolute fuck fest of like it was completely packed and the only way to get to the bathroom was to like go out there and so you'd go from this kind of like very nice peaceful hangout of like you know slightly crowded but whatever and then if you had to go to the bathroom you'd go out there i'm waiting in line and a girl came up to me and

it was the way someone approaches you when they're like i love the pod or like are you so and so she was like i love your videos and i was like thank you so much and she was like you're salt hank right and i was like no and then she just in my face goes bye and walked away and i was like what the fuck dude you should have cooked or something that is so bizarre really look if you want to if i had my mustache yeah or something but i was i saw no similarities just a white guy are you salt hank you're just a white boy with a dream i saw a playmate in the whole foods parking lot yesterday oh that's awesome i saw a playmate in the whole it's like yes doesn't that sound like a b song yeah that is a song it's a phoebe berger song right yeah um but he ran up and it's the way

he ran up and ran straight into you no i was already in the car with all the windows rolled up and so the way he was running up it looked like it was going to be like i thought it was gonna be like a prank or something and then he was like i'm a playmate and that was the first time someone had said that in person yeah that's very very exciting i don't remember but we took i don't know if we exchanged names we took a quick photo and left but his name was brandon she he couldn't have caught me at a better time i had a bag full a bag full of healthy food that was not mine it was flan's but uh yeah oh no you caught you caught me with a bunch of sugar snap peas i look awesome you caught me how they just you dude you should uh just snap peas probably

if it was healthy right oh my god i found the coolest bar shit's a snap peas i found the coolest bar in la where santa monica but on the other side like in that you know if you if you drove down ocean like almost to i want to say like uh i'm not gonna do a good job of explaining this but like you know you go if you if you were driving from the office to my house and you get to that part where now it's like a full neighborhood like it's the palace almost the palisades okay yeah kind of so we go like down this hill we're going to meet uh my friend julia's boyfriend and like his buddies i guess my friend too and we get there and uh it's like kind of this like bungalow type like old no not it's like this tavern type place and we go in

there are no it's pitch black except for candles on the tables and some candles on the bar like it was my type of bar yeah and everyone was just kind of doing like some good old-fashioned drinking and then at like an hour the hour mark of us being there i'll send you this video it turned into the complete opposite vibe so it was before it was a picture like a medieval tavern like they're handing you like big mugs of beer like they're not in glass i will send you this video people on bowling tables on the fucking what's it called i don't remember i'll get the i'll get the name of it but lauren this is somewhere over there i'm picturing this is a video of what is what why is oh sorry just the first thing i saw was sex therapy and i was like what did you google

lauren will you or i'll slack this to you and brian this in the fucking blink of an eye it went from like medieval tavern vibes to this pull this video up what oh oh my god just wait this guy everyone took their shirts off and he kept putting his ass in my friend jack's face i don't think he knew what the hell it was a blast it was fucking awesome where was it i'll ask flan but it was like deep in the bowels of santa monica like like yeah like i feel like it had to be there because it was surrounded by trees it was the coolest bar we have to go it was we gotta find out what it's called was it muse no golden it was the golden bowl that's what it is the golden bowl yeah so pull this up it's like a cool but picture that pitch black okay oh wow meat dude there was a

oh so they got like cuts of meat and shit you're getting distracted you're gonna keep drawing the ball this is cute a big cut it was fucking yeah there's like a fireplace in the background this place that was the back area it's on a boat i don't know something about that picture looks like it's on a boat totally it felt like we were on a boat there's something really cozy about carpeted restaurants there was there was a former usc quarterback there i forget his name i've seen him on tiktok he's like a podcast now matt liner no not matt liner matt liner and i follow each other no no big deal but try to get me to go to strip club wasn't once that liner yeah he was with his wife oh nice what after the super bowl party in scottsdale a couple years ago oh he was like

let's hit it i was somehow rolling with a ragtag group of former nfl players there's like some guy that used to be on the jets and matt leinert and someone i don't know how i got they probably were like what no i think they liked me and they were like strip club strip club and i was like i can't do that i left matt leinert's wife is in 17 again and i had the biggest crush on her she's an actress wait which she's an actress she's the girl that she has a hilarious line where uh sterling knight uh that's a dude that's the actor's name oh is it this girl he goes no it's uh yeah it's josie laura i remember her so she his pants are on fire and he's hitting on her and she goes you're on fire and he goes really and she goes no you're literally on fire that's funny so this guy i

wish i remembered the quarterback's name there was a usc quarterback there and uh him and one one of jack's buddies from usc who was help all caleb williams not like a re like he was like married he is like he's like 35 to 40 now sam donald no he's not in the nfl you'd wreck you might recognize him but he uh one of jack's friends also played football at sc and i guess recognize this guy and they started doing uh snap counts okay at the bar which you think would be kind of annoying yeah but given the vibe it was it was getting a big laugh out of me we i got him to get into victory formation and kneel it wait is that the thing that i see on tv where they go behind a guy at the bar yeah but do a hard count yes but this was two just two guys reliving their

glory days god i got it i don't think either of them had seen the trend got it that's very fun um i there was another guy there named cole who's very cool cole and cole that could be his nickname we were trying to get him we're trying to get him a lady to talk to and i discovered something you guys can try this out at home if you want to get a girl to talk to your buddy you have to walk up you have to leave the table and then walk back and very loudly recognize them from forbes 30 under 30 and then the girl is interested and she asked like what is he on there for i blanked and i said he's uh he his company is launching cars into space and she was so confused and intrigued that she had to sit down to figure out what his company did i like the idea that like they don't do

anything once they're up there they're just seeing if they can get them there i think like that's what he i don't know where he took it from there but i think what we landed on was uh yeah i don't know why i don't know why he was company be honest would that work on you the forbes 30 under 30 thing yeah uh no no well i'd be i'd be intrigued but that's not gonna she was in i don't know she was also keep in mind you know i said it was pitch black in there you did say that yeah you couldn't really see anyone's face you could just tell like that's a woman okay and she sat down and we're all around the same age and she told him she was 38 kind of hot so i think maybe she was intrigued more by the under 30 part than the than the 30 under 30 part but um if i ever made the forbes 30

under 30 it would be for just being a good hanging out with my friends it's like hedge fund youngest hedge fund owner cured is on the way to curing cancer and then it's just like wielding on unbelievably good hang home run hang like the the home run hang kid home run the home run the forbes person came to interview like your buddy call me like your buddy's very successful and the forbes person who came to interview them and you're like so like you're on such a good vibe in the corner that they just like pivot the interview and they're like i think that's our guy i think yeah i think that probably will be what happens they'll come for scott and then i'll just steal the show what would scott be on there for see he's making an app what does it do i can't wait

nice try i'm not gonna fucking i probably can't tell you can we bleep it uh i'll just tell you later are you lying no oh you're making two apps i feel like i mean now now he's getting carried away oh i'm i'm making an app he's too really what's your app do i'm not gonna tell you guys oh well that's fun for podcasting well it's like a secret i think she's making fun of me no i am and i'm also making fun of you i'm not gonna tell you his idea for an app just tell it and bleep it i don't trust lauren what would she get she doesn't know how to code yeah but she's gonna make it she's gonna ai can make it now probably ai can do a lot of things ai can make pictures of things i have thought about that i never thought were possible i tried to use ai to make uh an emoji

emoji right here i did it with a boob emoji i did it with a boob so kind of along those lines i tried to get myself with washboard abs and huge muscles and we'll put it right here and it puts you in a sports bra which i originally i was like that's annoying but then i thought about it it kind of makes sense because apple probably doesn't want you to be able to just take any one of your friends and see what their emoji would look like topless. I think they have a hard no nips policy. Or sorry, not hard nips. Not a hard no nips, but a no hard nips.

No hard nips policy. What the hell else is going on? Y'all see that guy on the boat, Aura Farming? What? Come on, that guy on the boat. It's like... Unreal. How have we not talked about this yet, man?

That shit is unreal. What do they do? Is it a tempo thing? another aura farm what are you talking about what do i look you never seen the guy on the boat it's like the number one thing online right indonesian kid we're pop culture podcast we gotta talk about this shit boat race yeah that's actually it got videos this you never seen the guy aura farming what what do i want is it the second was the second one first one try the first one fuck it it's got a lot of views it's gotta be that one yeah click it god damn it

yeah the individual road races taking off online for their ability to just look damn cool is exactly what makes the internet so incredible sometimes you're blessed with that's enough i don't that's it they or a farm basically they or a farm on the boats right i'm confused as lauren is right now you've seen this i know but now i don't even know where to start indonesia oh i watched a good movie this weekend oh sinners sinners sinners with michael be jordan and hayley steinfeld it took did you see it no but it's on streaming now it's very good i highly recommend um it did not head in the direction i was expecting but i if you don't know anything about it just don't even watch the trailer it's better to go into it blind

in my opinion i thought it was really good okay it's i know vampires are in it yeah and i didn't know that okay i didn't is that a spoiler it's not a spoiler i just i yes how much did you know about like how did you nothing i do nothing how did you know you wanted to watch the movie because i like highly wait it's a huge movie i like hayley side no i know but i'm saying like going in i've never gone into a movie knowing i feel like if there are vampires in a movie i typically know that going in well i just knew that i like her i didn't know i didn't know anything about that shit the saddest day of my life is when i watched the avatar for the first time

you know when the uh sometimes like the light outside is blue and it's like very like it's just like a sad vibe like you're you're like you're watching to your your your house you have none of the lights on and the outside light is like uh uh lighting the room and then it slowly gets dark without you turning the lights on now the whole house is blue and it feels sad I don't know it happens look up like like natural blue like summer nights

yeah yeah it gets the house gets like blue for some reason it happens every once in a while like blue lighting normal that's not natural blue lighting bluest guy to ever walk bluest yeah yeah it like makes your house like kind of that color

I mean okay that's not it I don't I believe you I don't know what you're talking about. No, no, that one with the pool. Go, like, there. No, no, no, down. Keep going down. There you go.

Like, yeah, out the sky. It's just his pool. Don't look at the pool. The sky, yeah. The sky is that color, and the whole house is sad. And I just remember being, my whole family wanted to watch it, and I didn't have, like, a phone yet. Right.

And the movie's just three hours long, so you're just sitting there watching, and I did not enjoy it. And it was so weird. I didn't enjoy it either. I mean, I was like way too young to be into it. Yeah, I was a kid too. I remember being long. Yeah, that vibe.

What else happened? I watched, I tried to watch Slumdog Millionaire. Did not go well. Way harder to watch than you think. Immediately fell asleep. Wait, what is it about? Kind of bummed out. It's an all-time movie.

I've never seen it either. I've never seen it. It won like every Oscar. I only saw the trailers. It was always when you would like rent a movie. Yeah. they would be that and then what was the movie about the kid who uh played soccer and he had to tangerine no that's the book i read and you know that okay uh there's a there's a there was a

trailer that was for every i think it was called go for goal can you look up go for go go for goal movie movie yeah yeah i think nothing came up you said yeah oh goal goal goal that's what the movie was called this trailer was on every vhs and the kid like goal the dream begins yeah and this kid like he used cardboard for his shin guards because he was so poor he couldn't afford shin guards oh and he i never saw it but the trailer was on every movie i don't remember that i remember i love kicking and screaming that's it that's it i love that movie dude how about our margaritaville moment yeah our margaritaville moment is our margaritaville i didn't realize how much

kissing there was in it it's awesome we kissed each other a bunch we are the margaritaville 200 000 views holy shit all the kids all the people think we're gay now i don't there was like a few comments i know wait they're on to us this is the most viewed friday it's in like a week in like a couple days yeah yeah yeah what's the most viewed video on that channel dungeons and dragons yeah 500 000 views but we're number two we're number two we're number two nothing wrong with silver nothing wrong it's a it's a dangerous uh success story because it was not it was a pretty brutal on our bodies yeah sell uh lawler sent me a slack this morning that shanghai just opened a lego land and he's like sells there's gonna send your ass to china get ready to learn

chinese buddy um what else what else i went through what else did you do thrifting oh me and jane like loki started beefing at the vintage store beef what happened if she listens so she's gonna get mad uh tell me what you guys think about this so actually this is kind of an am I the asshole me okay so we're at the vintage store she tried on this skirt you told her she looked no she looked chunky no no it was it was a cool skirt but like yeah I don't know I would have been fine if she bought it but then when she was like and I don't really want this anymore do you want to try it on I was stoked because I loved it so I was like yes so I immediately went tried and on i was very excited and then i come out and she's like we actually the griffin

griffin's her boyfriend she was like wait griffin said he likes it so i think i want to get it and i was like well you already handed it to me and i so that i bought it and now i'm wondering if i'm the asshole for keeping it because she already gave it to me that's a good question that is a good question i think that and she was like making me feel so bad about it and it's like if you still want to like let me buy it i'm like dude wait so what do you mean didn't like it until her boyfriend liked it exactly she was like she goes i'm not griffin's the asshole have we considered for saying he liked it yeah no i think he's always right he's always flapping those share it well she lives in boston send it to her cut it now i'm going to boston friday you can have it this week

okay i got it i got a good proposition no seriously cut it in half you get the top half we hem the bottom half into another skirt and then instead of one long skirt you guys have too medium size maybe i think you just am i an asshole though for that i don't think you're an asshole but she was making me feel so bad about it and then we started fighting and i went and shopped by myself for an hour yeah i mean if you if it was gonna if it's gonna come to blows like that you guys should have just neither of you should have bought it you should have given she should have bought it or you should she goes i don't want this anymore i think one of you should have just given up but it's a really cute skirt she's gonna listen to this and we're gonna fight

about it there was one time i bought this really cool washington wizard sweater oh god at martin's i should have bought it when i saw it at martin's it was a good find you can get you can strike gold there martin's martin's got some it's like someone found uh someone found like travis scott jordan's at martin's for like five dollars because the people that work there don't know what anything's worth i mean this washington wizard sweater was special and i i gave it to my brother i sold it to my brother for ten dollars so i thought i was like this is a steal and it was too big on me and then i grew up and i was like that thing is fucking sick and i found this at martin's can i i want it back and he like let me wear it one time and then i was like can i just have this until christmas

i'll take it to school and then i'll give it back to you at christmas or whatever he said no and he was like okay fine and then we went on the it was i guess it wouldn't have been christmas it was i'll give it to you this summer then we went on the natty light college tour and i got hammered in grand rapids michigan and took it off and threw it into a crowd of people nice and did he get mad yeah rightfully so but i found it yeah but you gave it to him but i found it at martin that doesn't matter you gave it how much was it at martin's like a dollar yeah the that reminds me we had a lost and found in our middle school see and casey my sister uh took this you're crying no i'm your sister because of sister no i keep yawning hey jane it's okay if you're listening

it is okay it's not okay all right you go the there was a day where they announced something like hey we are bringing everything to goodwill go nuts in the lost and found and my sister grabbed this gray sweatshirt and my buddy nicky was like oh my god i didn't even know that was in there that's mine and my sister was like no it's mine now and we were like what are you talking about that's his sweatshirt she was like yeah but they were gonna give it away she was like yeah but you found it before they did so now it should just go back to its owner and she was like no that's pretty funny those are the rules so she never gave back to him no it was insanity see that happened one time with joan i knew a guy named joan and okay uh well i didn't know it was joan's

i was in spanish class and there was this cool j cole hoodie yep in the back of the room it was on the back of joan's chair no it was just in the back of the room and i asked miss shields i was like wear this don't they don't they can l sweater and uh she was like ah that is literally been back there for the entire school year and it was like almost the end of the school year and she was like i don't care about that or she was like you can take it like that's literally been there for like a year and no one's taking it i was like all right sweet so i take it then i start wearing it to local high school parties and yeah it's a hit and then i'm wearing it to walmart one time and joan comes up and he's like yo that's my hoodie no and i was like miss shield

said it was in the back of a room for a year and i'm currently wearing it i'm not gonna give it to off my back right now and he was like no that's my hoodie and then he started like yelling at me and you're wearing his clothes oh no i forgot no this is what had happened sorry i missed an important step actually that makes this different i had sold it to my buddy daniel so i was at walmart with daniel and he was wearing it and daniel was like i paid will thirty dollars for this yeah and joan wanted it back but it was like he had paid for it and i had already spent the that's joan's fault so it was like dude i think at that point it does become i don't know i think i think that you know daniel daniel knew the risks of buying a sweater that had no owner

i guess and you knew the risks of selling it yeah i think that we i don't think we like i think that legitimately like we were kind of friends from soccer and joan and i hate like i he kind of had like freaked out on me and walmart and we never really i would be i'm i i am i try and always be on your side i'm kind of on you can't sell it'd be one thing to be like i'm gonna wear it around and like if the other person comes back and wants it then they can have it you sold something that wasn't yours you have miss shields no i'm on your side will if it was there all year and nobody claimed it okay let me let me put it this way i think you should have to buy back yeah 30 bucks we have encountered this a bunch where i notoriously leave things behind yeah in

hotel rooms and i left uh my broke never cheap shirt it's a sick shirt bnc in a hotel room lucas brought it home and uh started wearing it and didn't tell me that he had it and then he wore it i saw him like out one time like he clearly didn't wear it to the office because he knew if if i saw him in the shirt i would just be like what and i saw him out wearing it and i was like is that my shirt he was like yeah you left it in the hotel room uh and they were gonna take it anyway that's a very different so no no totally i'm like now i was kind of conflicted like i don't even know what the rules are here yeah but i he didn't take that it's gone i know but i'm saying like he was a good friend and grabbed it and instead of being like i have your shirt just

started wearing it and so to get it back i traded him one of the god is a playmate misprints for it okay that's a good deal and uh but like it's a dog is a play date or something yeah we were like we were hammered when we told the merch company what we wanted and we got it back this doesn't make

any sense fuck wait I was gonna say something a moment that felt like Hozier's yell ew I hate that

those trends oh I was gonna say something I literally have tears streaming down my face because of the thing with Jane

yeah man because of sister crying where is she by the way at Dogtown why not why not why not um i think she's nervous what if we brought the whole part of us wait is she scared of us no well no she uh no oh you guys we went to laguna on saturday

oh my god what the waves were so big i normally i normally submerge in the water especially if I'm going to drive an hour down south to go to the beautiful Laguna Beaches. Laguna Beaches is gorgeous. The waves. First time I ever had Taco Bell was in Laguna Beach. Oh, wow. That's very interesting. The waves were huge.

They were making saves. I feel like I was watching Baywatch. Like, it was kind of entertaining. They were making saves? Like, people were dying? No, they had to go in and just pull people out. Wait, someone told me they got saved. The current was really strong.

I think on Saturday. Someone I know got, and they were like, oh, no, we were just kind of dicking around. But, yeah. We used to go in the... It was a bummer. Yeah, I think Saturday was a big day for saving. Big saves. We used to go in the ocean and yell shark.

Well, ironically, it's a lot of saving. The Lord's birthday. Sorry, what? We used to go in the ocean and swim out into the cove. There was this one beach called Casino Beach. Lauren, pull it up. Casino Beach. And it's like in this cove, and we would swim out to the middle part

and then start thrashing around and yell shark, and then all the kids would leave. That is really funny. That was actually really fucked up, I think. Well, why do you say that's the day of Lauren's birthday? The Lord's birthday. The Lord's birthday? Fourth of July.

Yeah, look at this. Go to that fourth photo. So it's like this beautiful little. Yeah, that's where John and O'Connor and I thought there was a shark. We've looked at this exact photo before. That's my friend Archie's house on the right. That's Google potato with a hat. But not Mr. Potato Head.

Potato with a hat. nice don't you think it's awesome that now with AI we can google anything we want alright

that's not AI uh Ryan kid named Ryan the size of a house dude there's no way that'll work

holy shit oh my god wow fucking fucking man that's a huge kid named Ryan

actually can't there's nothing for scale so I can't really tell oh wow oh oh oh holy shit he's like the size

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half willie's got the raspberry i'm a raspberry guy always have been always will be i like the party pack because here's the thing you get all you get all of them and there's not nothing wrong with keeping it consistent yep but a little you ever played twee roulette can't say that i have you're not allowed to look in the case you just drink whatever you get but here here's the twist no pun intended yep they're all good so it's it's a everyone wins a lot of people they go what's what's your favorite place to drink a twee yeah tell me beach beach here's beach is good the key is to store them properly yep i like the most imagine the most amount of ice you can fit in a cooler that still has six tweeze in it can you picture it that's how cold i'm thinking about

oh yeah yeah and then i like to put them in the i like to put them in the sand like a koozie delicious guys go to your local liquor store grocery store wherever you get your tweeze and grab a refreshing twisted tea today keep it twisted brother all right we're back lauren said the saddest thing in the world and it's fine just move on okay what else is new okay there's enough guys do you think there's enough guys in venice to how often you think a guy gets killed in venice we were trying to figure this out dude why would you bring that up when i wasn't allowed to say what i just said i will say this is hypothetical yours was really said i would say on average a guy gets killed in venice are we taking murder killed why do you want

to talk about this i would say on average less than one a week yeah we think it's about once once a month maybe all i know is the first night that i slept in venice when we were at clubhouse i opened my window up to get a nice breeze going and i heard a scream that can only be described as someone who's who was currently getting murdered i i think yeah i think i heard someone get murdered i don't know dude as a guy who lives in that area i think there's just a lot of people who do those kind of screams do you remember that guy that was breaking breaking up with his girlfriend on the phone yeah that was we were on the patio he was like stop fucking looking at we were on the patio of our house on clubhouse avenue we don't live there anymore and there was

a guy on the phone whose girlfriend was breaking up with him and he was yelling at her about how she couldn't do this to him and he was making a very public stink about it and so we were just sitting there watching it because it was the most entertaining thing that could be happening and then he looked up and saw that we were looking at him and fucking lost his marbles and the only thing in between we were one story above street level and then there was there was about a six foot like hedge and that was the only thing in between him and us and uh and i think he like thought about it and then his buddy was like dude you cannot be doing this but it seemed like he was on oh my god maybe on some things i think he loved us oh i think he loved us i think i'm in love with

him what else happened this weekend my brain is like dude i gotta stop like crying right now oh we got pulled over our waymo pulled itself over we me sam zoe joe and flan we're in a waymo Which is one too many people To be Zoe Sam's girlfriend Sam's girlfriend Oh Wait that brunette girl

I was wondering who that was New girlfriend Where'd she come from I don't know where she came from But How'd they know each other Oh I saw Sam and Joe On Saturday

What'd you say I saw Sam and Joe on Saturday Nice But they I don't know where she came from But I think as of What I heard As of Wednesday

They're They've been together Oh wow we broke it on the pot breaking news but they the guy came over the intercom

and said that there are way too many people in this Waymo we gotta pull it over we were like how many people wait what one too many people

oh I had that happen once yeah and we were like dude we're two minutes away from the thing and so we were like Zoe whispered to my ear and was like just keep him on the phone

as long as you can because the thing kept driving got it while he was trying to figure out what was going on so we we almost stalled him

all the way to our destination but at one point he just ended the conversation was like i'm pulling it over right now and so he pulled over in the middle of the like a busy street and was like everyone has to get out that's really fucked yeah i hated it i tried to the one time i went in a way my buddy had called it and i tried to get in the driver's seat i didn't i thought maybe that was allowed and the guy came over the intercom was like get out of the driver's seat so i was like oh yep and then i went and got in the back seat and it's like too many people

that sounded like that sounded dicey at the end there i was just trying to do like a wait that's a new voice you've never done that are you kidding he does that every time he's hammered i'm not doing this when i'm hammered not that one you do the other no that was what i was going for i think you started out swedish and you ended like asian jesus christ man you're gonna get me you're gonna get my whole fucking family brought wait that's like uh yeah i got this that's uh started out swedish and ended asian is tiger or tiger woods's kids they're half swedish oh yeah there you go or yeah quarter asian i guess um i want to go to sweden or norway or something i agree there's a girl that's been showing up on my

on my reels oh god and she is from finland and she just posts about her cleaning the sauna and uh it makes me want to move there it looks very very very tranquil but they do it they're a family and they do it they all do it naked together which that seems uh no wonder why you're following this girl i'm not following her i'm not following her i saw a couple reels i was thinking about going because you're leaving for like two weeks at the end of august yeah so we're gonna have to like do a bunch of pre-recording and stuff yeah you might as well i was like i might as well go somewhere so i was but i was like i don't want to go anywhere fucking hot i'm not going i'm not going to voluntarily go somewhere hot yeah and uh go to

the go to the netherlands that was so fun i was thinking about going to like norway that could be fun too i think here's what we should do going forward when one of us books a vacation yeah that's when the other two should just go on because if one of us is gone we're all we can't do anything anyways yeah so it should be all of this yeah yeah yeah but all of our vacations should just be lined up so let's let's sit down maybe we all pick a different continent so there's no chance of bumping into each other god forbid god forbid i don't know yeah maybe we'll go to the same continent maine maine is a continent do you guys have any interest in going to antarctica no yeah oh yes definitely before i die my aunt and uncle just went there really they said it was

chilly did you know that there's a there's a part of uh whatever the what's the capital of austria vienna i think in the vienna airport there's apparently there is a desk this happens so often people think they're going to australia and they end up in austria or vice versa that uh there is like a help desk that is strictly just to get people to the place that they were supposed to be that's funny because people will just like dumb people will be like austria yeah one time my brother and i were trying we were we were in the airport and our flight was staying forever and then right across the way they were like they're now boarding for iceland and we're like should we just fucking like imagine we just fucking went to iceland and then we walked over there's the

joke and realized it was ice slip new york which is like a long island we're like i wonder if anyone's ever i tell you i hang out if i have a long layover i'll hang out in the coolest destination i can find yeah you have to make people think i like that sit in the i'll sit in the like key west one and try and catch that vibe for a little bit i like that move i want to live in the that could be that's a good could be the move yeah that is a good move i uh i want to eventually live in the keys do you know that about me i don't ever want to live in the south again but that's florida's not even really the south i just mean because like the humidity and stuff oh i thought you meant from like a beliefs standpoint no no i love charleston i just

i wouldn't want to spend my summers there ever i started watching vanderpump rules pump rules ever heard of it it is so there's this restaurant i don't know if it still exists i'm on season one yeah it's like on san michael boulevard sir yeah okay there's this restaurant called sir and all the people all the workers there are fucking nuts and uh they all i just watched an episode stassi who's the fiery one she had a birthday party in vegas she was dating this guy named jacks who is a bartender there they break up she starts banging uh keith no someone else starts banging another bartender he goes to vegas jacks goes to vegas secretly to break up the birthday party and there are those guys there are those types of guys where

every time a fight breaks out even the ones that aren't involved like take their shirts off yeah like that and uh it was i want to start doing that more there's never there's never been a point where i've been so mad i want someone that i need to get my shirt off i've seen you take your shirt off not out of frustration you're right it's always a good a good move out of humping willie and i were talking tell horn about the that bar in amherst that uh we thought we willie and i willie and i got a little over served at this bar in amherst we were at this bar in fucking amherst massachusetts going like we just over served going absolutely nuts like there was pictures of me on top of the drink coolers behind the bar and then like i was djing shirtless djing

shirtless i was like serving people from behind the bar and climbing all over the drink coolers and woke up at any at any other bar you would you would be like banned for life yes and we woke up with like the most anxiety anyone's ever had drop my phone in my own diarrhea earlier that day actually unrelated kind of but i woke up my phone was dead i was like the worst oh my god i finally got my new phone long story short we get a text from the owner of the bar like last night was unreal god gotta get you guys back sometime i was like i i was like literally speechless i was like there is absolutely no way that's so fun wait who else was it just you guys or um it was that you know yeah yeah why were you there we had a party bus to the party back to boston after at midnight

oh my god um we were there for like a college tour okay we were trying to get our beer just our beer had just gotten to amherst oh that's so we were trying to sell some beer i can't i can't well maybe that helped they gave us it really works they gave us the uh they gave us the full amherst treatment we sat courtside at a at a like umass basketball umass basketball game where there was it was just it was the big city it was the big city i'll tell you man something special in the air there yeah but lauren i don't know how to dj obviously and so the real dj was crouched below me actually hitting the buttons oh and then i was shirtless pretending to dj which in the moment i thought looked very cool and then i saw a video of it the next morning and it made me want

to start eating better yeah most um most things it seems i've noticed this with drinking it seems like things seem cooler in the moment yes and then sometimes that too yeah i don't know i wouldn't read too much into it that's what you get for waking up in vegas yeah flan's roommate's cat almost let me touch it the other day really yes does he mean uh she she is not mean she's just very skittish and uh usually she runs away but when i come out of in the morning but uh now she hangs around and so i've started kind of putting my hand out and this morning she sniffed it and went and then scurried into the bathroom so i don't know if i had been petting dogs or something but she did not like the smell of my hand oh i think i'm gonna run the long beach marathon

oh wow yeah how's that october 5th what's the longest you've run that half yeah but i have three months so i plan time my sister's running the new york marathon and from what i've heard has done almost no training so i think that's she's still got time november yeah yeah she's playing but i think you should have started you should start training now yeah but when's the chicago one i just was feeling like i don't know uh chicago one is like october 11th or something 11th or 12th it's like that weekend whatever i was like yeah i the half is really fun and then like i've been having fun but i've been lacking like i'm like i need some sort of like goal or like something that's cool so i kind of had an epiphany yesterday are you still doing that

like the mount everest of mexico hopefully in november yeah we haven't booked anything yet but it looks it's very different than mount everest but it looks but what's it called again pico de orizaba sounds like it pulled up well we're our buddy that was supposed to do it with us bailed so it would probably just be mean scott so we're do you need like oxygen uh no you just have to You spend a few nights on the mountain as you go up, so you acclimate. I mean, that looks... That's still insanity. Is there snow on it year-round?

Very cool. I don't know. If there's snow on it year-round, it's too high. Wow, that's scary. God, that's fucking crazy. Yeah, we'll see. I don't know. That seems more up in the air now, but I think...

You know Sean White snowboarded down Mount Everest? Mm-mm. Pull that up, Lauren. It's fucking crazy. Nice, Sean. New ball. Oh, is it wrong? I thought it would be W.

I did, too. Yeah. He seems like a guy that would spell it that way. Did he really? Go to videos. Or all, yeah. There's no credible information or evidence that Sean White is snowboarding down Mount Everest.

also i really think i was that thing he told us about like eagles like not clawing their own claws off i saw one of those like andrew tate videos of him talking about that i should have googled it i just didn't oh wait but willie was finally wrong about something on monday's or on one of the most recent episodes when i was like confused about the timeline of what stadium the lakers played in you had it wrong what are you talking about you i was right about when they were at the staples center when they were at the whatever and the comments were saying that you were wrong i didn't look into it what are you talking about what did i say you said you were talking about like when they played at the forum and when they played at the staples center the

lakers yeah and apparently you had the it was like the first time you've been wrong about wait i disagree when did okay lauren can what wait well i said they were at the kia forum and then they went to the staples center downtown and then that became crypto yeah i guess that that was wrong that is not wrong that is a fact a bunch of comments were saying it what are you talking you gotta send me this shit there's no way a bunch of comments but um this morning oh okay this is off topic but do you want to keep talking about that uh my lane was my lane was closing closing off they had the when i was driving to work they had the cones so like obviously i have to merge into this lane and i'm trying to get in front of this lady she's about to like it's like

clearly bro you just gotta slow down and like let me in like i have nowhere else to go and then i end up getting in front of her she goes what is this i have no idea she was just like she's like talk your shit queen talk and maybe she was gassing you up no she looked pissed talk your shit queen come on you driving come on or she was doing like crab hands crab hands come on could be oh i saw little crabs in laguna is that what these are called hermit crabs yeah these little guys oh no not hermits the regular looking ones crabs yeah lauren google google how many people what percentage of people have crabs

it's got to go down since the bush went out of style right two only two wait that means like one person we are the two percent one person that we work with has crabs it's me no completely the idea it's me i have crabs i'm clipping that do you think you've ever had crabs i thought i did one time oh yeah you had you had a jock but for jock it's ruined my life for a little bit there i ever talked about this no it was during our live tour run in april oh and i i was i had uh been very dormant sexually for a very long time and then had to indulge myself oh and then you say jerked off we don't need to hear about no i didn't jerk off okay anyway i had not hooked up with someone in like a very long time and then

i had hooked up with someone and then i had developed what i thought was an std and it was right when what is lauren pull up jock itch symptoms no don't don't don't don't why it's disgusting oh we don't need to do that it's like bumps around your crotch like red bumps around your crotch what did you think it was gonna be i don't know like like you were like and it was from i found it was it was because i i had it i was i was at the peak of my like half marathon i was running a bunch and i wasn't uh i wasn't wearing the right shorts and i think a lot of times i would get home and like make dinner instead of like just showering right after and so i had getting but it was during our live show and i was we were doing these cool shows and i was like on

the stages thinking about it and every every every live tour stop that you guys have like there's like a spike in jock itch no it i don't think it's like girl girls in minneapolis are getting jock itch whenever will comes to town no girls that's a sign jock itch you know like certain uh certain graphs that like don't make sense like mirror each other like housing prices match like the amount of nickelodeon shows coming out or whatever it's like uh girls between the ages of 25 and 30 are getting jock itch when willie d comes i did not give anyone jock itch but everyone in the crowd everyone in the crowd is very worried for it was very a very stressful time i also think stress like makes it worse sometimes and i was very stressed and anxious inflammation it would

like flare up and i'd be really itchy google has anyone ever died from jock itch no one's dying from junket i just started putting the cream on it went away it was fine and i went to the doctor and i felt bad for the poor doctor no a simple case of jock itch also known as tinea curlis i really didn't like having to show the doctor my wiener it was like a should i click on images yeah pull it up oh that's not that bad what the heck no that's that's what jockage is that's what i had willie you're you're on stage and a tentacle comes out of your pants you're like get the fuck in there it was well i was like pinning me backstage and i was like i have to go on the

stage and the jock and jock to put the jock jock it's not always on your cross that guy has it on his tummy is that a man's penis yeah oh where the third image no not mine was mine was not nearly as bad as all it was very mild in retrospect it was just like the anything red bump wise around my crotch freaked me out i was freaked out i thought i had jock itch i mean i thought i had i thought i was dying of an std when i got when i had strep throat they asked me if i wanted to also get an std test while i was in there and i was like why not because like when when's the next time you're gonna go on everything came back negative obviously but it was uh on flan and i's second date i she was like how was your day and i was like it was good i uh and then i told her that

i went to the doctors and i thought it was weird that they asked if i wanted an std test because of my throat and she thought that i was getting one because i needed one because i didn't tell the story very well and so i had to tell her that i'd i got one hey no shame in that yeah i had to get chester out of the car so i had to ask chester to take me chester was like can we go to carl's jr to i need help filming this carl's jr ad and i was like yeah but if that is the case i need you to take me to urgent care to get tested for stds he was like okay square deal so we went to carl's jr filmed an ad and then he came and he sat in the waiting room with me while i got there for him like while i was getting yeah it's kind of sweet actually beautiful yeah should we can i pee and

then we'll do the road map yeah guys fourth of july just happened oh baby guess what i was wearing on fourth of july chubby's chubby's original stretch short they were hit because i i you know what it's basically it can be a swimsuit if you want yeah and i got a little nervous and i jumped in the pool and guess what you got so nervous you jumped in the pool sometimes i get nervous i jump in the pool and uh chubbies has their their swim trunks and their shorts are everything is just comfy as all get out i don't know what the ones that i have are but they're the seersucker i think they're the original stretch short but they're a little a little more formal i could wear them golfing i could wear them to the beach anywhere in between on top of a

grape on top of a grape you could literally wear them anywhere they're so stylish they're comfy they look like they would be like khaki material shorts like nice yeah stiff shorts but they they got they stretch as much as as long as the day is wide you know what i'm saying yeah guys summer's here and if you're not letting those dogs breathe a little bit with your chubbies i'm talking five inch shorts i'm talking classic lined swim trunks get some chest hair popping with that chubbies performance polo amen this is the time to do it for a limited time use our exclusive code play for 20 off at chubbies shorts.com let the thighs out let the good times roll they're built for living and they're built for dying probably not dying i probably shouldn't have

said that sorry chubbies they're not built for dying they're built for living they're built for living they're built for living whether you're suiting up for cannonballs cookouts or casual fridays chubbies has you covered for a limited time chubbies is giving our listeners 20 off your order with our code play at chubby shorts.com that's code play at chubby shorts.com support our show and let them know we sent you summer's here dress like it in chubbies let's get back into the episode hear that it's your money calling it wants a promotion elevate your savings with the scotia high interest savings account always earn high regular interest rates that grow the more you save and invest conditions apply visit scotiabank.com slash hisa to learn more scotiabank

you're richer than you think all right we have a beautiful episode for you guys today we're going to hear your pitches followed by our pitches then we are going to do am i the asshole lord do we have some bang we'll do one or two i have one we'll do one then we're going to do everyone's favorite segment that we no longer sing the theme song for because you guys don't want us to sing it this guy rocks rocks and

then we're gonna do teach me something don't worry I double-checked that mine mine seemed too crazy to be true so I googled it and it's true all right and then we're gonna do curb your enthusiasm more

curb your enthusiasm plots that don't exist and then we'll do some mr. beast videos that don't exist and then we will end with rusty's song of the day we got 3400 of you bad boys i believe subscribed there so uh guys again if you go follow that playlist when we hit 10000 two of you are getting 101 dollars bang i realize that you're not a lot you can't send screenshots unless i approve it so i apologize for that but

i'll just have to well pick two of you and uh we'll take your word for it respect all right lauren let's hear some pitches okay oh no this person didn't even put their name um this is from sabrina sabrina sabrina wait how did they not put their name did they dm it to you oh no do you have the google forms um so their email it doesn't show that so it's sabrina what's your social um i don't know i'll ask okay hello linny tuck and ming ming don't you feel like ming ming's a little dicey i'll be ming ming i'll be linny i want to be i'll be tuck of those people you google it oh the wonder pets oh nice love these guys love them okay which one's ming ming i don't know i'm nervous whatever

you're not a hot one okay um sabrina says or whatever your name is okay hear me out what's the one thing that would make tv instantly better oh louder no uh stupid having a say in what happens next sometimes i'm like this isn't going in the direction i wanted it to oh yeah or uh hotter no bigger bigger bigger okay um longer no me bigger and longer all right shorter shorter ads longer screen shorter ads bigger wider screen shorter ads bigger ass bigger light bigger tell us louder volume bigger guys watching it okay okay yes there we got it back on track so they say live comments built right into your show yes oh my god wait fuck that wasn't even close to what i was i i have gotten so used to when something happens because i think tiktok's

ruined my brain where i like the comments just as much as the video yeah or when i click it i want to see what other people are thinking right there are times where i'm watching a tv show and i wish like netflix had comments where i'm like surely someone else would be like this is fucking crazy we gotta talk right well so listen um they say i know will has had a similar idea before but please trust me when i say i've thought this for years and when will said his version i just had to share mine i'm not really my version i don't know we pitched too much stuff you're on netflix disney plus whatever you flick on playdate commentary mode and boom you're basically at a watch party with a million strangers no switching to twitter no doom scrolling hashtags no hunting

for what people thought it's all right they're perfectly synced exactly when you want it sure live tweeting is fun but you can't always catch a show live this way you get the same chaos and instant reactions synced to the exact moment you're watching anytime i love that this could exist maybe yeah i think that we have rotted our brains to the point where i can't i cannot form an opinion without thinking what other people without finding out what other people agreed i do think that's important to i love it i think i think we are i think that there that will be on streaming services within the next three years yeah yeah although it'd be like overwhelming well no you would you just i think it would be the same way as when you're watching a youtube

video there's a sidebar where you can go see what other people are saying but it's not like on the tv yeah i think it would definitely depend on what you're watching like i'm sure reality tv that kind of thing it would be more fun to have it on for but getting getting really also like people would definitely be like dicks and would like spoil it yeah oh yeah just type out like he's about to die well i think it's like it could be the way soundcloud is where when you're on a song yeah it will show what part of the song they were listening to when they commented but i mean like people would comment go like a few seconds before it and spoil it i would hate those people yeah yeah this is fun though all right i love it i'm in okay um as well next one says howdy

anakin obi-wan and padme i will be padme i'll be obi-wan anakin this is charlie do you know what you know he's like hot right yeah okay cool do you know who he turns into darth vader yes no no he's from anakin star trek no yes you're pranking are you a trekkie lauren no how do you know anakin because i know like the names i just don't know the bach that's star trek yes so is anakin they're brothers oh so they're star trek and star wars are in the same universe kind of but not really anakin is anakin is in star trek but he's not he's not in star wars yeah but that is like somewhat connected okay you're pranking you got fucking i'm so i got tracked i know that's so dogged on okay or is that weird i don't you got dogged on normal not like in a

weird way okay we don't want to hear anything about lauren getting dogged on dog piled on ew good lord okay this is charlie charlie checking in from boston charlie your boxton accent your boxton accent i don't know this is charlie this is charlie from boston night i don't know i just wanted to do that come on charlie bit me that's what it sounded like okay what's the worst part about studying out of a textbook uh read any of the words i will when i haven't cracked open a textbook in a while but what i would notice when i was trying to read out of that is after i would read a paragraph and then realize i was thinking about something else and i have to start over yes okay um charlie says way too many words for our dopamine addicted minuscule attention spans to

handle i present study tube trademark pending it's an app for your phone or computer that allows you to scan physical or digital textbook chapters sections etc and it will turn them into short animated in informative videos similar to crash course with john green surely loved crash course crash i love crash course with john green surely we will be leveraging ai on this but that will be for the engineers we are high level a premium version will be available for a mayor mayor for americans for mayor for a mirror for all the mayors premium is only for a mayor or perhaps a governor for a mirror 4.99 a month in which you won't even need to scan the textbooks you can just search which book and chapters you need and the app will make the video

for you subscription price goes toward purchasing the online textbooks copies tell willie d go eegs new bc alum and fellow circle tavern employee here oh wow what's her name charlie charlie go eagles shout out to circle glad you made it out you made it out the circle i have a question who are the green brothers and why are they so smart because they both know a ton about everything it seems like and then one of them is also one of them wrote the fault in our stars they're brothers they're brothers john and hank green are brothers and they're both brothers brothers and both of them are so smart and i don't know what they do and i don't know how they they're i don't know what i don't know how they got that way are they twins i don't think so no which one do you like

better i think one of them is now in remission for cancer oh yeah oh they're really cute and wholesome they were the coolest yeah i mean i think they just started they were vlog brothers yeah but they just know they're just were they like academics they must be i think yeah just really smart guys god i wish i was smart wow that's cool oh they were literally called the vlog brothers yeah they started like youtube they're like early on youtube huh one of the autocorrects was is hank green lgbtq yeah i think he is oh nice yeah one of them was born in alabama the other one was born in indiana god being that smart would be so cool yeah that's cool um yeah i think it'd be more of a do you think i would be happier or sadder if i was really smart

sadder yeah i think so too really yeah i think it's uh you're not supposed to know that much because aren't like all the smartest guys in the world like depressed i think so yeah because they know everything like for me like i learn like a new thing every day and i'm stoked about it but if you knew everything already and then also i get to i get to think a lot of things that aren't true and live in that live in that world that's very fun for me um i love it charlie this is awesome thank you guys well done circle gang runs runs deep yeah i do like that the circle all my all my brothers from the circle man that was you can make it out if you can make it out you can make it anywhere man if you can make it there you can make it anywhere you can make it if you can

make it working at this bar i used to work at this bar and when once all the customers left are you talking about the circle yeah okay well yeah or sorry a different bar uh like after all the customers left like the one of the like old guys who was like part of the family that owned it would just start like smoking cigarettes at the bar and he would just he would offer them to me so i like i could i would do my closing work sometimes just while smoking a cigarette inside the bar it was it was there was no rules it was lawlessness yeah man that's all my shifts i was just pouring myself drinks with my friends yeah we it was dangerous i'm not gonna say what what bar this was but i worked at a restaurant bar a restaurant a

restaurant and they uh they i think we're a little whoever told me the rules on shifty's i think was like not the right guy to ask i think you were supposed to get one after you were done yeah but I think everyone did one an hour, or that was the rule, but then that turned into when is an hour technically. Wait, one an hour is absurd when you're on the clock. That is what people said, and then there were just a bunch of kids just doing the job, kind of buzzed. One an hour, in theory, if you stuck to it,

you would never be more than one drink drunk because it takes your body an hour to metabolize a drink. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Even if you're working. if you're working and you're also doing it every like 45 minutes then you're just kind of drunk at work you're okay yeah yeah uh all right what's the worst part about this is a two-fold question what's the worst part about one the beach in general but two maybe going uh this is for my girlfriends my girlfriends out there okay when you bring your boyfriend to the beach what's the

worst part about being there with him he wants to they want to sit on your towel he wants to dig he wants to dig oh introducing and they're restless and like they just we don't i get i get very bored at the beach yeah wish there was something to do and to will's point we we yearn to dig i do yearn uh introducing treasure hunt our company will go to the beach beforehand plant a bunch of treasure that's fun provide your boyfriend with a map or girls can do it too but it's mostly for boys boys um and it provides you with a map and a story to go along with you know what today's treasure is and then you have to go around and try and navigate where the treasure is dig it up it's kind of a clue based thing each treasure leads you to the next one

yep next thing you know your girlfriend has had five hours to tan and you're you're just finishing now you can go to dinner i like that a lot wouldn't that be fun i like digging i like treasure i like maps like everything that you said it check checks all the boxes my boxes have been checked yeah catch me buddy that's great uh mine is i think a bird with no wings one second well i love how your uh hat matches your phone it's nice do you like it yeah it's good oh speaking of bird with no wings and i will i will i will preface this by saying again i learned it from a tiktok so i reserve the right to be wrong about this one okay apparently the japanese in world war ii had uh piloted uh missiles from their submarines where it would shoot a guy out and he was in there

steering it into another thing it was like a kamikaze missile do you google that lauren i reserve the right for this to not be true but google japanese manned torpedoes yeah okay it auto corrected let's see yeah guys would get in these torpedoes and steer them into other isn't that fucking terrifying

yeah that's insane that is fucking insane yeah oh what a fucking nightmare I would hate to die so spooky if my commanding officer told me I was going to be the guy that was in the manned

torpedo i would just drive that shit to somewhere else yep yep i'll hit the boat they're like radioing in they're like hey have you gotten it can't find it one second oh gosh like that they hear you like they hear you like beach on a on a boat and the hatch pop and like a party starts are you guys partying nope no no probably not doesn't that sound like a fucking nightmare lorne so creepy yeah that's ass all right here's my pitch a baby carrot silencer i like nibbling on my baby carrots when i watch tv with my friends but it feels like i'm it's like a ruckus yeah it's a so loud there's a loudest snack so they call them nature's dynamite yeah nature's not indeed yeah i think there should be a way that

they can make baby carrots where maybe they're just like a like a little softer or they just have like an attachment on them that just neutralizes the sound maybe you put a helmet on yeah yeah soundproof helmet yeah yeah and it feeds them through a tube yes and there's like a button that like shoots one in which i think arguably would be more distracting if i'm trying to watch watch tv with my buddy next to me an f1 helmet with a tube full of baby carrots i don't know that could be kind of sick yeah or oh i got an idea we take the the baby carrot seed yeah and we pop it like popcorn okay so you get the same flavor but it's just as silent as popcorn baby carrot seed

what lauren pull baby carrot seed well they're they're not there's no seeds yes there is what you mean there's no seeds what do they grow from kind of see at some point how do babies how do babies grow yeah what we're on how do how are babies made oh what no no no it doesn't even carrots grow from seeds bang well i mean i am on fucking fire today not baby carrots well aren't baby carrots oh my gosh i think baby carrots are just big carrots grown into do you guys know this or cut into the shape of baby carrots i don't think baby carrots grow small yeah they just they're like man-made oh really i'm pretty sure that's really cool so yeah it's probably really wasteful though like what happens to the rest of the carrot

uh they probably put it in like dog food or something yeah wow see this is what i'm talking about if i was super smart yeah this just made my whole day i just learned that baby carrots are not that's not how they grow how to cut carrots oh wait it's definitely wasteful well lauren google what do they do with the excess carrot after making baby carrots yeah what do they do with the rest of the carrot after they make a baby carrot what do they do with the rest of the carrot the first one was what do they do with amputated limbs that's another question i got i'd say probably the answer is still dog food okay animal feed carrot juice okay wait i was kind of right too they do they put them in dog food or animal food wait is that what you said

earlier yeah okay the more you know wow all right should we do am i the asshole or yeah carrot juice vegetable stock cubes and powder oh so they wait they only put use messed up carrots oh messed up that would actually make sense like there's like a defective carrot wow or a misshaped one that they could sell the way it is so they just make it into okay it's not pretty dude you do not want to see how they make baby carrots everybody looks not pretty everybody likes baby carrots no one wants to know how they're made yeah it is gross it hurts um yes let's let's wear my mug socks today mug socks it's just a certified mug all

right um so oh my god wait i was watching i've been watching love island yeah and i've talked about this this is the first season i ever watched apparently this season is much hornier than other seasons okay but it is fucking mayhem like they're like basically they're like challenges there's no incentive to win it it's literally just always ends in them like twerking on each other's faces whatever binder was i was uh auditioning for love island i don't think if she got on that show i would be able to look her in the eyes after they're literally like it is mayhem there was one where they had to run through a slime pit jump in a ball pit

and then they picked a girl and that girl had to come make out with them in the ball pit. W. Sounds kind of fun. Can you imagine if your co-worker was on it?

How do they go back to their... If Edge was on it? If Andrew Nelson was on it... I said Edge. Oh, if Edge was on it? Oh my God. If Edge was on it, I would watch it.

There would not be a ton of edging happening in my house if Edge went on it. Ain't that the truth? I'd be... going all the way. Bursting.

Who's worried about COVID? Raise your hand. Come on, right here. Lauren, do you ever have COVID? I didn't like January, actually. I think I was one of the first guys in Florida to ever have COVID. No, I was. Fucking going to my trap.

The second it was leaving my mouth, I was like, he was never in Florida. Am I the asshole? hey hi guys i'm janna and i recently moved out of my apartment into another city quite far away some of my friends were eager to throw me a going away party which i thought was very sweet the only problem i had was that my move was super spontaneous and i was deep in the moving stress i was in the middle of packing cleaning and kind of just getting my life together because i'm not very good with change which my friends are very much aware of one of my closer friends was super

hyped about the party and wanted to throw it at my place which at this point looked like a literal war zone half packed boxes all over the place most of my furniture not being there anymore just literal chaos so i told her look i like the idea but unless you can help me with the move i honestly don't have time to spend a whole day partying i still have so much to do and i'm already really overwhelmed she didn't take that very well she got kind of distant and didn't really respond after that and now it's been like radio silence we used to be kind of close and now she feels not only physically far away but also emotionally also i just feel really bad about how i left the city i spent the last four years in because all i did was go out for breakfast with

some of my friends but she wasn't there so now i'm wondering am i the asshole for basically ruining her party plans or was she overreacting also i have no idea how to fix the problem p.s greetings from germany i love your podcast i'm sure the german playmate community grows every day guten tag jane uh william i will say no you're not the asshole i think they the fact that the fact that one she was that excited about the going away party red flag and then also i don't think wait this is her roommate no her friend wanted to do the going away party at her house yeah the friend should have done it at her house yeah i agree and also should have helped you move and also why are they so stoked or why is she so stoked that you're leaving why does she want to

party so bad because you're leaving i think that i think that if i had to guess what's her name again janna i would say that janna was probably above her in the pecking order in their friend group and she was stoked to move up a spot and take there's a power vacuum after janna left and so she was going to throw this party as her as her coming out party as the new group leader i don't think it's ever your fault it's about like that's like if someone wants to like do something for your birthday like that's it's like no like yeah if it's your thing you get to dictate what how you choose to yeah yeah don't let someone like guilt trip i feel like she's guilt tripping you into being like i'm trying to do a nice thing for you it's like yeah it's like no she's trying to set

boundaries she's very you're very stressed about moving you don't want to do that then you don't you shouldn't do yeah yeah nta not the not the nta not the asshole uh nine the asshole nine um yeah i know should we do this guy rocks this guy rocks this guy rocks today hey hey i said this guy rocks and he rocks so hard he rocks in your house and he rocks in your yard there's rocks in my yard uh let's start with willies hit me oh right right right you're like it fourth of july theme yeah that video fucking crazy yeah sitting on his arm from what i gathered the guy wasn't doing it to make my friend mad he just was not aware that there was oh that's fine i kind of i wouldn't be mad oh all right this is a guy celebrating a fourth of july

in style and he is in what is he wearing tap shoes yep he's tap dancing tap shoes is that an old folks home it looks like it might be yeah This is awesome It's not super on beat Few things have filled me With as much patriotism I love that Than that video right there

Yeah that was That was good Did you just go to follow him? Follow him I don't think I'm logged in that was fantastic i will say for you know i'm not it's i'm not gonna uh throw stones from from a glass house here because i understand that i couldn't do this yeah but it feels like maybe he was kind of mailing to them a little bit it seems like he had not practiced that song

feeling it out it didn't seem like a very tap conducive to yeah but man that is just that is what the country's about but there are guys there are guys in yeah and hatred and and fighting and and just bad energy in this country sometimes and i think at its core what america is about where it's happening is a kid going ham on his shoes at an old folks home i mean that where would you is that ever happen in england probably not probably not probably be shot by a freaking musketeer i'd like to see i'd like to see you redcoats fucking try that yeah i would like to try try that can we like can we watch this one i want to watch wait one more thing lauren oh lord the same guy oh wait it's probably gonna get like copyrighted i guess yeah uh i guess the other

imagine fighting fighting in world war ii and you you save the world from the nazis yeah and you know your family puts you in an old folks home and the celebration you get is a kid who probably put that routine together this morning i mean that is special that is really what it's all about let's give it a shot see what he's got this one yeah be humble yeah he has the ability to oh yeah okay that was pretty also the red shoes i like that one i have faith in i have faith in him that if he if he had one more day to to put together a routine he could have fucking nailed this one but also the energy yankee doodle too should we watch out

The middle one? Yeah. He just feels like he doesn't really want to be there. Get rid of that. I can't watch this one. This one's ruining my love for my country. His grandma made him come and show this to all of her friends at the old folks' home. He's a grandma.

I like him. He has a grandma, by the way. He seems great and probably happy vibes. Prongly. All right. This? Yeah. All right.

So this is a woman who is attempting her first base jump. Okay. It looks like they're either at, like, the Grand Canyon or Moab. They're somewhere in the desert, and they're about to jump off a cliff. And let's give it a shot. Moab. What? Moab.

Yeah. Philly Eagles Super Bowl Oh that's how I knew that Okay yeah so this is Moab Are you ready to base jump Fuck yes Oh I believe that What's going through your head right now

I feel like I should be more scared But I feel completely safe with you I'm plenty scared for both of us I feel brave and confident Grit and grace Let's do this motherfucker I like it join me in counting at three jump after you say one five four three two one

oh my god look at this you did it you made it look easy i did it you said people didn't think you'd do this i did it look where you are right now oh my god who's having more fun No one right now. There you go, Tanya. I'm the queen of the world. Hell yeah, you are. That looks so fun. Isn't that sick?

Oh, man. I don't want to do that. It's so bad. And just like that, we are on the ground. And they stick the landing. Whoa. What a badass. She's the queen of the world.

She's the queen of the world. Could not be me. I couldn't fucking. I don't know if I could do that. I could not get myself. I thought that was so sick. Yeah, that's really sick. I think I, I'm sure I would shit myself, but I would love to do that.

Yeah. Isn't she awesome? Yeah, that's really cool. I like that a lot. Yeah, that guy is awesome. Great energy. Dude, he did it. He made it.

Yeah, yeah. Sometimes those guys are, I feel like they kind of get off on making the people scared. This guy seemed like just a solid. He like matched her energy too. Yeah, yeah. That made me so happy the other day when I saw that. That's really cool. Legend.

oh yeah i don't know dude base base jumping's no fucking no joke that made me that i i i could never do that me neither or maybe i could but i that scared that would scare the i would only do it if that guy was with me yeah that this was like probably the best marketing they could ever do right yeah yeah i'm like if i was to go do this that is the guy i would want to do with i think i could do skydiving but this yeah skydiving the base jumping i feel like is way because if the thing doesn't come out your host your host because you have no time to react uh all right should we do teach me something have you guys ever heard of how this lava this wall of lava lamps keeps our internet secure no so uh to like prevent people from hacking into the internet we

like encrypt it obviously and people there's pretty good hackers out there so one of the ways that this one security company in san francisco like keeps the code random is there's this wall of lava lamps that uh cameras track it and the movement of the lava and it is like random and like if you come and look at like it's open for the public to come see so if you go and like move in front of it it like puts spits out random code or whatever so these like hundred lava lamps or however many they are keep like 10 of our internet encrypted and like impossible to hack because it's like random code constantly just following where the lava would go oh that's kind of bizarre yeah lava it's not real lava though right we have a lava lamp in our office do you know uh daniel

camarena i was reading about this guy this is a he was a baseball player relief pitcher uh uh did not have a very illustrious career played like a couple of games for the padres in 2021 but in one of his first games he ended up having to bat in the fourth inning as reliever against prime max scherzer with the basis loaded and he hit in his first ever mlb at bat hit a grand slam and they won by one run that's crazy and then ended up like his career era is like nine something like he did not pan out at all but he hit a grand slam off max scherzer and they won that game This is a regular season game. Regular season game in 2021.

That's fantastic. It was sick, yeah. I saw a video of Clayton Kershaw pitching in high school. Yep. He pitched a true perfect game, which is when you strike out every batter. Oh, wow. And then he also hit a home run. And all the comments were like, can you, like, there's some guys that just should not even play high school baseball.

Where they're like. Just skip it. Normal kids had to go play this guy. There was a 0% chance that anyone was going to get a hit off him. And then he also hit a home run. Yeah, that is insane. Ridiculous. Mike Trout hit a nuke off my cousin Timmy.

He's a pitcher. But also, couldn't curse on me the All-Star game as, like, a Legends pick? Fucking bullshit. You're mad about Juan Soto? Well, that one's ridiculous. I mean, that's just, like, ridiculous. I don't know what they're... Like, if you look at the stats, like, Tatis made it and Soto didn't, but...

You're, like, looking at me like I would know. It's just embarrassing. Will's favorite guy didn't make the All-Star game. but it's like literally they just drafted that yeah it's it's so it's one of the it's just like does he normally get on it or yeah but also like he deserves to be on it this year like he's he's better than the guy in his position that got it by every statistical category they just want to mix up they want more teams represented i think and they want like young guys like tatis is like fate you know i don't know whatever it doesn't matter but also kodai sanga got snubbed

and they gave Clayton Kershaw a fucking all-star spot when he has been not that good. But I digress. I digress. Do you guys want to do Curb plots that don't exist or MrBeast videos that don't exist? Let's do... You pick.

Let's start with MrBeast and then finish with Curb. Done. These are MrBeast videos that don't exist. Okay. one dollar family versus one million dollar family uh mr b spends a day with a family that only has one dollar to their name and then works his way up to a family with a million dollars nice yeah which one does he like the best he he uh doesn't like any of them right i guess they're all dicks okay uh one dollar trolley problem versus one million dollar trolley problem uh

he puts together a kind of rinky dink contraption where someone has to choose if they're going to kill one person or five people with the trolley yeah and then he does the same thing with a really high tech high speed train where they have a lot less time to think about their decision i like that uh 5 000 homeless people compete for one house how does it what is the competition it's 5 000 homeless people battle to the death yeah it's just a fight to the death for a house and he gets off on it okay and he doesn't pay any of them uh get addicted to something get a house for every vice that someone gets addicted to he will give them a new house so if you get addicted to cigarettes house

heroin house drink you develop a drinking problem you're gonna get a house i like that a lot uh i survived 100 hours in a guy's house and he didn't know i was there this is one where he breaks into someone's house and he's to survive 100 hours he makes a guy do it to win a million dollars i freaky friday'd my wife and her mother and it's clear why he wants to do it but he never admits it uh yeah impressively got the tech uh ten thousand dollars for every day you spend watching mr beast videos guys in a closed room only mr beast video pays for its playing yeah exactly it's a win it pays for itself exactly thirty five dollar haircut he just goes and gets a normal haircut and it's not versus anything nope just thirty five dollar haircut pretty good

deal these days yeah uh fuck me win five hundred thousand dollars one dollar employee versus one billion dollar employee and it's just mr beast fighting his lowest paid worker there we go uh oh and then i also had one dollar for every cigarette you smoke for life that's no so he someone could make you know a pretty good year's salary if they just spent the whole day chain smoking yeah that's that's shout out mr beast man we have mr big inspo for us all right should we do curb plots that don't exist yeah these are more curb your enthusiasm plots that don't exist larry goes to the doctor to get a mole removed from the bottom of his foot the doctor said it will be slightly uncomfortable to walk on for about a

week so he gives him a handicap parking hanger and instead of putting 2025 he accidentally puts 2026 so it's valid for a whole year uh uh when he uses it to park outside the dodger stadium a worker there says the team is honoring honoring handicapped people tonight and they want him to sit in the best seats in the whole stadium an enemy of larry's sees this all go down and leaks it to the news that larry is pretending to be handicapped to get free stuff love it that's funny uh the guy in front of larry at the atm covers his pin number very dramatically larry tries to overcorrect and look behind him where a woman happens to be breastfeeding she scowls so he turns back to the atm the guy at the atm then accuses larry of looking at his pin to which larry

insists he was not and says something like what would i even do with that number to make it up to him larry get let sorry to make it up to him larry lets the guy watch him type his pin number not thinking much of it larry then gets his bank account drained before he gets home larry suspects that the barista at his coffee shop is putting regular milk in his coffee when he asks for oat milk because his stomach is killing him every time he drinks this coffee he goes to confront the barista and when he's yelling about the milk he collapses when he goes to the hospital the doctor tells him that the milk was oat milk the whole time and that he had an ulcer from the stress of thinking that it was oat milk the whole time at a dinner party larry meets a white guy who

tells him he's a writer for blackish larry can't wrap his mind around that and continues to ask questions while cheryl tries to get him to stop another guy at the table turns out to be a reporter for a tabloid and publishes an article claiming that larry is against diversity quotas in writers rooms i love it larry's cleaning lady tells him that he needs to start doing some basic cleaning around the house before she gets there so that she can really deep clean and not spend her time picking up little bits of trash every week she keeps asking him to clean more and it gets to the point where he doesn't know what cleaning she's doing when she gets to the house because he's basically doing it all for her and he confronts her and asks her what he's paying her

for relate relate respect larry goes to a restaurant during restaurant week and finds out they have a preset five course meal but he only wants one of the courses so to prove a point he's with four other people and so they order one five course meal and dish out one course to each person trying to make a statement i love that uh what else do i got larry's new girlfriend chews so loud that he has to start wearing earplugs when they're out at dinner uh they're out at his favorite restaurant that he's trying to become a regular at and because he has them in when the food gets there he doesn't hear the owner trying to thank him for his business so the owner thinks he's rude and won't let him make any more reservations

love that uh i have some more that i'm gonna read and you just tell me if we we can sub we can sub them out sub sandwich larry's friend is an uber driver and tells him how waymos are hurting their ability to make money larry promises he would never take a waymo out of solidarity but after a horrible conversation with an uber driver larry takes a waymo on the way home and gets hooked by the silence and ability to play his own music at a stoplight he has all the windows down and is blasting his music and talking on the phone about how much better the waymo is when his uber friend pulls up next to him and hears the whole thing uh i also had an idea that um larry thinks his girlfriend is taking the stuffing out of his pillow and putting it into hers to make it more

fluffy when he confronts her when he confronts her about it she adamantly denies it but he doesn't believe her they break up and then he comes back into his room and sees that because he's been leaving his window open to get a nice breeze a bird has been coming in and taking the stuffing for its nest that's funny i also this is my last one larry gets asked to do the obituary at an old classmate's funeral that he was never really that close with he's confused but he does it out of respect he learns that the classmate has been telling everyone that they were lovers in college and instead of breaking it to the instead of breaking the family's heart he changes the speech to make it seem like they were star-crossed lovers who couldn't be together because of social

pressures okay that was all i had good uh okay should we finish with rusty's song of the day hey yo uh rusty's song of the day today is what was it called hard to live in the city by albert hammond jr uh i heard it in gossip girl a couple weeks ago and it made me happy so i can't you know sometimes we can't tell if you like a song because it reminds you of like a moment or like a part of a show or something or if it's just actually a good song yeah that's where i'm at so you guys you guys tell me i like it a lot uh again go follow when we hit go follow rusty songs of the day on spotify uh when we hit 10 000 followers two of you are getting 101 come on so go follow and let me know when you did and yes lauren what's your

the comment today oh no oh spam pringle pringle and your favorite flavor favorite flavor what's your guys's favorite flavor of pringle salt and vinegar i don't really think i like sour cream and onion oh i think those are probably the best but i don't really like pringles oh my gosh i They're just not a crack. I have to be in the mood specifically for Pringles. Like if I'm in the mood for chips, Pringles wouldn't do it for me. Because they're not. Why are they a little different?

What are they? It's like how In-N-Out fries are technically fries, but they're like such a different texture. Like no other fries. Yeah. I think they're just like, yeah, they're their own kind of chip. Why do Pringles? Why are they like that, though? Is it because they're like not?

Are they real potatoes? I think so. They must be. Google why Pringles like that. Gluten free. Only 42% of Pringles are actually potato. What percentage of waste? They're made from a dough.

The FDA's definition of potato chips requires a certain percentage of real potatoes, which Pringles doesn't meet. Oh, that's funny. So they're not technically potato chips. They can't even call themselves potato chips. That's so sorry. Alrighty. we love you guys have a great rest of your Wednesday have a great rest of your week have a lovely weekend and then we will see you bright and early for our Monday episode

it's gonna be a big one