Will & Rusty's Playdate - rusty opens up about finding soldiers in his bedroom

Episode Date: August 28, 2024

Will hung out with Creed Bratton at a Mt. Joy concert, Rusty built a functional Lego lighthouse, and Lauren’s waitress ate her food. The boys talk bunk beds, a barefoot Jacob Elordi, Bailey’s in your coffee, and guys who think they’re vampires. They also draft a classic segment, slang words that don’t exist, as well as some folklore that doesn’t exist. Stay tuned until the end of the episode for a special surprise! FOLLOW OUR SOCIALS: https://www.flowcode.com/page/playdatepod SUPPORT LAURA DONNELLON FOR BEST BUDDIES MAINE: https://www.teambestbuddies.org/chicagomarathon/supporting/#laura SUPPORT PETE AND OLIVIA FOR BEST BUDDIES MAINE: https://www.bestbuddieschampion.org/maine/supporting/#olivia DOWNLOAD THE APP AND TAKE CONTROL OF YOUR FINANCES WITH CASH APP. IT PAYS TO GET PAID ON CASH APP! https://apps.apple.com/us/app/cash-app/id711923939 HEAD TO https://rikispirits.com/ TO FIND OUT WHERE TO GET RIKI NEAR YOU. FOLLOW @FRIDAY.BEERS AND @RIKISPIRITS TO STAY UP TO DATE WITH UPCOMING RIKI CONTESTS AND GIVEAWAYS. TRY EVERY MAN JACK TODAY https://www.everymanjack.com/discount/PLAYDATE FOR 25% OFF YOUR FIRST ORDER. USE BETMGM BONUS CODE PLAYDATE AND GET YOUR $1500 FIRST BET OFFER TODAY https://promo.nj.betmgm.com/en/promo/geolocator?orh=promo.betmgm.com&wm=7123555 (00:00) Intro    (02:12) Best Buddies    (05:11) Willy Kicked It With Creed Bratton    (10:08) Rusty’s Killer Flight Attendant    (16:09) Legos    (18:48) Childhood Bedrooms    (22:53) Fever Dreams    (27:02) Will Got New Shoes!    (30:38) Sexiest Men Alive    (36:23) Roadmap    (37:04) Pitch Submissions    (47:17) Pitches (Presented by Cash App)    (55:44) Prank Call    (58:42) AITA    (01:10:38) This Guy Rocks    (01:16:04) Teach Me Something    (01:22:28) Folklore that Doesn’t Exist    (01:29:42) Slang Words that Don’t Exist    (01:33:15) Whose Personality are you Stealing?    (01:35:08) Big Announcement! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Boy in the night It's just you and me, boy Two soldiers bonded for life 58 miles No one's coming for us When anyone else would quit They'll do the impossible I got you

And get home Heart of the Beast is an uplifting triumph You're the greatest dog ever Bread I'll get you home Heart of the Beast Don't you wish you could just hit skip on the worst parts of your life? You know, the same way you can skip an ad?

I get it. I'm Siaya, and I live in Ice Cove. I've made some questionable decisions that didn't end up the way I planned. And today, I'm still figuring it out. Somehow, things usually get worse before they get better. Apparently, that's how I roll. So bundle up and come along for the bumpy ride. Stream a new episode of North of North Tuesdays on CBC Gem.

Kurt Warner is 13. Damn, he looks horrible for 13. That was a first. All right, my guess for Ray Lewis is also 52, Lauren. Ray Lewis age? For age? He's like 41. 49.

That was close. All right, I'm going to go. You know he killed a guy? Yeah. Did you hear that, Lauren? He did. Why would I know who this is? Ray Lewis?

Oh, he's like one of the greatest linebackers of all time. He's like the black Brian Urlacher. i would i would argue i would kind of argue the inverse of that but yeah he was outside of a nightclub and he stabbed a guy or something and then like he had his boy like take the fall for it like there's a guy like yeah there's a guy like serving time he got a ring that guy got a ring right i i think ray lewis probably pays his family like yeah he killed two guys so we don't like this guy no he's awesome okay i he's a great football player so he sucks no i think there was more to the story i think i think all right give me brad

johnson wait one little bad one moment i just want to get i want to let lauren know i'm not i think it was like i think there was there was more to the story i don't think it was like i'm just a cold-blooded well they were determined they were in self-defense it says yeah so he Like, he killed, but there's another guy that's, whatever. We'll move on. Who'd you say? Brad Johnson. Who's Brad Johnson?

Age. He's a quarterback for the Buccaneers. Ooh, 62. Damn. He's older than my dad. Damn. He's my dad's exact age. Oh, speaking of the Dinellans, I'm in Maine.

I fly into Maine. i go to this charity event for this fundraiser for my buddy pete and you know we're chopping it up having a good time and you know when someone walks into the room and they kind of start making a beeline for you and you're like okay all right let's figure out who let's let's rack our brain let's figure out who this is because they clearly know who i am i obviously i know what your mom looks like it was just like given the context and like how random it was yeah i didn't immediately jumped to that's mrs denellan and she came over with uncle kevin and i recognized uncle kevin first and then put it together and was like oh my god how are you and we had a great night yeah i

got a bunch of pictures and phone calls and stuff i was at work and they yeah my mom and uncle and rusty were all vibing some of the guys there were the funniest the funniest people it was a it's for best buddies you know best buddies they i think they have it at like most colleges yeah yeah yeah If you're listening, they're doing a fundraiser right now and go donate to Best Buddies, but do it under the, go to Best Buddies main and donate specifically to Olivia and Peter because they're trying to win. And then, no, but actually, we'll put two links because if you also would like to donate to Mary Pat and Kevin, they're both competing for champion of the year right now.

Yeah. So we've got. It's kind of a win-win. Oh, you've got a friend and I have my literal blood on the line here. well for the record i'm okay with either of them winning i just i just okay so i think my mom won last year yeah i can i i think so but there was champion of the year there was this woman very nice woman i forget her name but she's like the her and will's mom kind of run it together right and she came up or her this other girl came up and was like uh yeah we're trying to win but this

girl her mom already donated 20 000 so we were just like we might be fucked you should you should wait until the end of the fundraiser to donate that so people feel like there's a chance they're gonna win and then you at the last moment like buzzer beater 20 grand yeah um but yeah great cause go uh go donate if you can yeah we'll put both the links in the description please please donate to either uh just not the woman who's winning by twenty thousand dollars but so there was this guy that came up that name i think his name was brad and he was like um you know we're talking he's like what do you do and i was like i was trying to explain to kind of our strange job i'm a creative visionary and he's like he's like do you live in los angeles i was like

yes he goes tell me all the famous people you've met and when you're under pressure i feel like we've met some cool people yeah but i panicked i couldn't think of one person so i was like uh do you know like diplo he was like no and um i was like well hey you know what i would say what sorry is this story going for a while because i want to completely reroute it go for it i i would have a great new addition to that yeah you had a killer night last night last night mount joy concert at the hollywood bowl uh my buddy jack is their manager hooked me up with a ticket uh boogie in my nose no okay so i i landed i was in charleston all weekend i flew back went like i stopped my house change and just went straight there uh get there like i don't know

where i'm sitting or whatever so i have to go to like will call and blah blah get my ticket go in you went to will call i went to will call it's just for me and uh i go in and they just keep sending me up further further close to the stage i was like oh shit this this seat's about to be awesome and then at the front there's like these private like booths have you seen this yeah at the book there's like tables right you can have like you bring your own food and it's like a table in, like, a little four-person booth. It's like you're at a restaurant. Yeah, and you can, like...

I mean, I obviously didn't bring any food because I didn't think you could bring food to a concert. You had, like, a picnic basket. People did, though. People had, like... The people next to us, like, had charcuterie and stuff. But, like, they're not, like, fully blocked off. It's just, like, a little enclosure

that four people are in. How about, like, at... What's the one I... What's the one that... In the Greek? You know, they have those tables at the Greek that are, like, booths. It's almost like club seating,

and there's, like, couches and stuff with, like, tables in the middle. like wait the one where you saw mac to marketing yeah i didn't yeah what did you learn i said like little cubicles yeah it's almost like it almost is like a little cubicle which presumably in a four-person cubicle those would be bought and like everyone in it would know each other yeah but i showed up i was just a solo and so i was put in a cubicle with three other people which when i walked up i was like oh this is kind of weird i was like and they had put all their chicken tenders and fries on my chair so i was like hey uh i'm so sorry i i think this is my seat and like there

were so many other open booths it was like are you kidding me yeah but they sit down on their chicken they were like what really and then the lady came over she's like yeah no this is him right here and i was like they're like okay oh yes they kind of scrambled the maid room and i come in and sit they were all friends yeah so it was an older man two two older guys and one of their daughters uh so the two people in front of me just those are the people i kind of saw the faces of before i sat down what's that she hot she was like in high school um so yeah uh and then i sit down in my seat and probably would have been better decide to say what's up to the guy next to me i was like oh yeah sorry to crash your little thing but uh it's really nice to meet

you and he goes oh no or you know great to meet you i'm creed it's fucking creed i'm going to creed on the 30th no no i'm the why would he say i don't know maybe i'm guns and roses who's creed bratton that's from the office oh yeah i was i was like i'm will wait why am i google creed bratton you're like uh okay yeah yeah that's it was creed that sounds like a creed he's 81 he looks great for 81 i'm like he was great too wow and uh it's so funny to be like to be like how was your night last night like yeah i mean creed bratton we're just tearing it up we like i played it like i i was like too far in at that point too well it would have been weird if i was like oh my god blah blah so i was just like oh i'm well great to meet you and then we

established that like we both knew we'd both gotten tickets through this guy jack so i think he had yeah put he knew we were texting later he's like yeah dude like are you at the show i put you next to cree yeah i was like yeah i noticed that is funny he said and jack was like yeah he would be great for the pod and i was like yeah but then at this point i was so it was like halfway through the show and i had already played dumb so then i couldn't be like you should come on my pod because then it would just be like i'm asking a random guy to come on you could have been like dude you're really killer you should ever want to come on my podcast um dude i'm going to create on the 31st the groundwork really yeah that's awesome uh what yeah dotry's opening that's gonna be great

Three Doors Down is opening. Where is this? San Bernardino. That's awesome. And, yeah. Oh, I made him laugh, too. Killer. At the end of the show, they were like...

So we were chatting up the whole show. He used to be a rock star. He had, like, a number one single in the 60s. Isn't that crazy? We were, like, he was telling, like, stories about tour. Oh, they have a song called Bathroom Light, and Matt, the lead singer, who will get in here one day, was, like, he was like,

this song's about falling in love in the bathroom. Yeah. And then Creed goes, I've done that before. But it was with cocaine. Yeah. And I was like, oh. His daughter's like, dad. Yeah.

It was his buddy's daughter. But it was weird that he was like, it was with cocaine. Yeah. It was right there. That's funny. Yeah, I blowed down with Creed Bratton last night. Yeah. No, no, no.

But then at the end, they took a picture. And they were like, let's take a picture with the whole crowd in the background. And after they took it, I looked over and I went, shit, I blinked. And he loved it. He died laughing. I love that. And he was like, great to meet you, Will. You have a great night.

Aw. It was the coolest thing I've ever done, ever. I love it. It was the coolest night of my life. All right, guys. Who wants their airplane story of the week? Lauren does. Me.

I board a 5 a.m. flight from Portland yesterday and sit down. There's this, like, you know when you get, like, the really old flight attendant and they're so nice and, like, they're just, it seems like they're having a better time than the other ones. She is, she's handling, you know, first class, no big deal, sitting up there, 1A. and uh sit down people are boarding she comes up she goes can i get any coffee i go that sounds great and she goes you she like leaned in like it was like a secret it was like you want me to put some baileys in there and i was like no and then i was like you know what yeah i will actually that

sounds awesome i've never done that and she was like she's like i'll put two and you're gonna love it oh sit down hell at five and he's like i'm getting this kid it was it was dude she did it to everyone it was almost like i almost was like is she drinking because it was like it was the same thing as like when your buddy is like really trying to convince everyone to have beers yeah yeah like she like wanted it to happen and then uh she kept coming and topping me off and so it was like i wouldn't even get through the first one so now i'm losing track of like how much coffee is in here versus how much bailey's and like towards the end i think it was just mostly bailey's and then get to detroit board my second flight sit down first class again no big

go and uh the he's insufferable insufferable for free zero dollars to and from maine first class for free and uh the lady or the new flight attendant came around and was not as fun as the other one and i was like i do a coffee with two baileys and the guy was like okay like it was like you could tell it wasn't as uh fun for him that's a bummer yeah it's it's they should have you should have requested that she come with you on the next flight i started doing decaf and bailey's because i was like i've had enough i've had enough coffee yeah was it just black coffee was it yeah and it turns out i was like i'm not really i'm not really like feeling anything it's like a liqueur it's not like yeah it's not like a shot of yeah it's like yeah but we had a good

time then the guy next to me started drinking and then we got into the screwdrivers there you go we i i had when i was i went i was waiting to board my flight yesterday there was an announcement over the pa in charleston it went whoever left whoever left their magazines and fedora please return to tsa i repeat if someone's missing magazines and a fedora they are at the security checkpoint and i've tried to get my phone out and record it i couldn't but i was just picturing the guy like sitting down next to you on the plane with the fedora in this magazine oh god he's he someone in tsa made fun of it so he left it there on purpose and was like trying to leave that part of his life behind him dude the guy the guy at security in portland you know like if there's

something that gets flagged it'll just be like a square and it shows where on the body ding dong it was on my nose on my shoulder so he starts patting me down and then did a full body pat down made me take my belt off he goes and just now just expose your waistline and say like pulled it up and he's like running the backs of his hands on the inside of my shorts and it was like it wasn't it was awkward but it was like if it's just my shoulder why do you need to check down here yeah i don't know you just want maybe you get to the bottom for a feel no there was nothing down there what okay weird wait your story about your flight attendant reminded me i went to breakfast yesterday i was in salinas california which is like so i was up in i did my road trip

up to monterey and i went to this um felt very just like small towny like not much going on in this town but there's this great breakfast spot that was recommended to us and our waitress was this like 60 70 some year old not 70 she's probably in her 60s year old woman and she was so cute probably one of the best waitresses that i've ever had and after she dropped our food off she kept like walking by me like like that looks scrumptious i was like don't you see this shit it was so i mean hey i tipped her really well like she did great but it was so funny like when she dropped off she's like oh like looks delicious and then she's probably just hungry no it was so funny she really wanted a bite be a shame if someone left a little bit of it did i ever tell

you about the kid that spoiled the flagel for me on the flight what's that so i play like a bunch of like geography games every morning and one of them's flagel and like every time you guess it shows you like another sixth of the flag and you try and guess what it is whatever it's not first of all not geography well no it also shows you the distance so your first guess is a complete stab in the dark and then it'll be like you're 10 000 kilometers like west or whatever and so i'm like kind of honing in on it i'm like pretty close i'm like right on top of it and um i know it's one of the islands like in the caribbean and he or is that like the between like mexico and whatever yeah east of mexico yeah whatever i'd be in the the bahama like bahamas area

yeah yeah so i'm there i like i'm kind of right on top of it and this kid is looking at my screen and i didn't want to like preemptively be like don't tell me but you could tell he knew what it was and as i'm about to do my final guess he leans over he just goes uh it's granada and i was like thanks guy how old is this kid our age pussy all right i was like yeah i'm fucking pissed now yeah thanks man appreciate it that's a bummer just ruined my entire day i'm sorry that what i was thinking that he had done the flag already but i guess he just saw the flag no he was yeah no way he had done the fuck he was like i think initially intrigued what the game was yeah realized he knew what the flag was and then wanted to show me that he was smarter than me yeah he owned you

he fucking got me good it was really annoying my leg oh do you guys see my lego set that i built yeah put a picture of it right here i didn't really know what it what like what was it it's a lighthouse he told me this morning it's a fully functional light it is fully functioning wow it stops boats from crashing into his apartment there have been zero boat accidents in brentwood since i put it up no you flip a switch and it works wow it's battery powered it's six double a's okay and 12a how long did it take you six hours so i think it should have been a two-day project but i opened it and it was so overwhelming and ty walked by and goes there's no way you finish that today and i go no i think i could

he goes there's no chance and then he left at like two o'clock and i said by the time you get home it'll be it'll be done and it was it'll be ready it was it'll be ready it'll be hot and ready it was ready it was ready at like seven that's pretty good i don't know much about the lego building process but i'm still getting ass fucked by this sorry pardon my language af'd by this chewbacca i've been building it for like months clip that will's getting ass fucked by this Chewbacca um no that's fine it's if you just sat down and did it you could finish how many pieces is it I know I don't know like several thousand okay yeah this one was two thousand my next project is either uh the titanic which is like the size of that couch or um fun yeah but I need

to wait until I need to wait until I yeah pull the titanic up we'll put a picture of it right here titanic oh it's fucking ginormous and uh and i have to wait until i have i'm gonna put a desk in my room strictly for building legos because right now when i build them i have to just take over the kitchen or the living room yeah and i feel like that's kind of annoying i have that as well i don't have a good spot to do my new house i will which i'm excited yeah i'm moving on sunday there you go oh my gosh it's gonna be awesome this is 900 yeah retail what are you gonna get on the black no i think it's like sold out on the lego side so you have to like find someone on ebay who like hasn't opened theirs yet and they know that it's scarce so it's gonna be more

than 900 i think so and you're gonna do that wow uh crazy i think i would have to i think i would have to get no i'd have to get a check that justified me spending that much money on legos yeah so we need to um so if any big sponsors yeah we'll do like a dance we'll do literally anything i'll build the legos and i'll put your logo on we gotta get a lego sponsorship um wait will are you excited to move i'm really excited to move yeah um it's gonna i'm gonna have my own bedroom and bathroom for the first time in my life yeah um first time ever yeah damn so pretty excited what's the first thing you're gonna do with your own bathroom i mean i guess by the time when my brother went to college then i kind of had the room to ourselves so but were you guys

bunk beds yeah it was a bunk bed were you a top or bottom guy uh bunk wise i was a top with kubaka i'm a bottom dude i would yeah no i would yeah i was a top bunk and i stayed in the top bunk after he left because that's kind of cute but then also i had this uh i had this alarm clock on my phone there's an app for it actually it's actually just built into most iphones the alarm app on my iphone and i would like as a way of getting myself out of bed in the mornings i was really i used to be in high school so bad at like getting up in the mornings yeah so i'd put my phone like way down on like the nightstand by his bed and but then i'd be up on the bunk wait you live in a bunk no but like i have to put my phone across the room for me okay yeah yeah so this was

like presumably if my alarm goes off i would have to get up climb down and by that time it's like all right i'm up yeah i started like in my i would wake up and i had somehow in my sleep like i must have been like hanging by my knees and like full like it was an i would wake up and have slept through my alarm and i was like how did i get there it was insane i don't know it was crazy i had a red i think a red bunk bed when i was a kid but i yeah i had the room to myself so it was like i think it was more i think my parents were just like children have bunk beds so i like had one yeah and uh there was no like no second bunk to it no there was but like you didn't have a no one slept in the other one yeah and uh brother but like people would come sleep in it like

friends would sleep over in it but the railing on the top was like not very high yeah and there were like multiple times where i would like fall off an incident and wake up like as i like smacked the ground and be like so unbelievably confused because you're like you're like you're like it's the one time where like you're falling in your dreams and like you I actually fell like six feet like onto my back yeah that's horrifying there was there was one time where I literally thought I died I woke up I would sleep I would rarely sleep on the top bug I would sleep on the bottom bug and I'd rolled out of bed in my sleep and not woken up when I hit the ground but then I like rolled back over into when I woke up I was under my bed new from Nespresso blend wellness into

your coffee routine with the coffee plus range infused with functional benefits choose the coffee you love with added b vitamins like coffee plus b12 to help support immune function and coffee plus b6 to keep your day moving or go with the flow and choose ginseng delight our new double espresso with ginseng extract whatever lies ahead don't change your morning let your morning change you discover coffee plus on espresso.com i remember just being like oh oh waking up under your bed that's been all time scary it was like and you're like not old enough to like it's like a new meaning to waking up on the wrong side it's like wilbur woke up under his bed this morning but i remember like not being able to like explain what happened and like my mom was like how did

you get under i don't have the faintest idea i would i'll never forget i had these bunk beds and then my brother went to college and so i just had bunk beds in my room for the rest of high school and i think at one point we separated them but still it was like a little twin bed and uh when i left and went to college that year my parents got an exchange student from uh slovenia yeah and immediately got him a queen bed and a new mattress and like decked out the room and i came back from college and fucking renee had like the coolest room of all time i couldn't believe it she's like an xbox and you're like yeah it was all this but she's a guy so oh you can't you can't knock me for renee renee for a guy i've never heard that it's slovenian he's from

ljubljana oh pardon me i'm not i'm not well right it's kind of a girl name i never teased it yeah but i didn't really think about good i would have hoped i would have hoped that even if you made that connection you wouldn't be making but he was buddies with luca donchich oh nice got his tickets to a mavs game it was sick i uh do you guys ever get did you guys ever have like super strong fever dreams when you're a little kid i don't know what that means like literal fever yeah like you're like so sick that you're like dreams are crazy i never really got sick i had like pneumonia or something like bad and uh i and terry was having like like i think like borderline like hallucinations like in my sleep and i walked in my mom said it's the creepiest thing she's ever

seen i like walked into their bedroom and was like in my like footie pajamas like at the foot of their bed and they like footie pajamas yeah they like cover your feet oh wait like when you were a little baby yeah i was like five that's cute i just i've never heard that word before oh really what do you call them i never had pajamas like a one i've never i've never owned pajamas we couldn't afford them no i'm not i just have always just slept in like my underwear and like a t-shirt or yeah yeah the uh but they said they i like the i like the visual that it was like you just that was a luxury that the denoans yeah that was like the one thing no no i yeah um but i was at the foot of their bed and she said she could like feel someone's like presence in the

room so they like woke up and i'm like staring at them at the foot of their bed and they were like hey buddy like what's up and i was like there's soldiers in my room and she was like what and i was like there's a bunch of soldiers in my room and so they went into my bedroom being like surely there's not but like maybe there's like an intruder or something bad so they like went in there was nothing but i had like i was so sick that i like hallucinated like army guys that's in my could you imagine like your kid wakes you up like that and you go in and there's soldiers in his room i'm m lieutenant jacob oh i uh i used to i don't think i knew what the klu klux klan was like as a kid but i remember like i remember like what this goes somewhere my i was

terrified of like things in my closet but they were never like monsters i would always be like there are like these hooded men oh you were you were ahead of your time yeah i was scared of racism yeah and respect but i remember like deep into my like 12s was like it was too old to be like there are hooded guys in there yeah and uh my mom just having to sit me down and be like there's not there's no like just be afraid of like monsters one yes it was like i guess that's if you're a parent and your kids like there are monsters in my room you can be like well i'm not afraid of that because i'm an adult and i know monsters aren't real yeah but if your kid's like there are hooded guys in there you'd be like that's scary that is kind of yeah have you ever

seen i i'll know when i went did my year in spain my sophomore year high school no there was what well you said did you ever see well no have you ever seen what they dress up like for easter in spain no google like spain i think it's easter yeah like spain spain outfits oh okay not loving that isn't that crazy yeah so i was like out out and about with my host family and those motherfuckers start marching down the street and i was like holy you're like it's happening yeah i was like oh my god death eaters yeah that's terrifying um can you google why they do that one it's literal just clan outfits um who do you think stole it from who probably the clan got it from them because they're yeah i don't really one uh one like super racist guy

from the south took a vacation to spain he's like i have a brilliant idea or yeah i don't know all right let's just okay um yes let's just guess yeah it's hot i don't think this they're afraid of the article is gonna answer well i'm trying to figure out like what this is like called oh it's called crazy hat week it's spirit week well people are gonna be really excited about your new shoes i know i'm stoked i got two so i i flew to charleston got in thursday night on friday i woke up went to go for a run realized i forgot my running shoes so then i was like all right i'm just gonna go to the shoe store so i went to the shoe store and they're like a general shoe store in charleston uh general

shoe store that's the guy in your room uh no if it's uh rack room shoes on king street lower king uh went to rack room shoes found some brooks running shoes oh so we get we we don't have we we're done with the old brooks ones yeah are they the same color as mine no i got new ones cool i got they didn't have the ghosts so it's not they're not actually ghosts it's a different model of brooks runny shoe i got them and then i also saw these and i got these and then i left my tevas in charleston so i i ended up net one shoe positive for my trip but a little bummed about the tip take tevas tevas tevas tevas tevas i think it's tevas i've always called the lady at toad and co told me it was tell us toad and do you know that toad and co used to be called

the horny toad i had a bunch of i had a bunch of shirts the way you said that was like like i'm the only one who knows what yeah it's a small boutique store in portland maine uh yeah the the the one in freeport i think is still called the horny toad but uh i think that's cool i know i went into orvis in uh freeport a couple weeks ago a couple days ago and uh some more of my dad loves that shit these are these shorts are Orvis Orvis is great

um but you know when you're in a store and the it feels like the sales people don't want you there and you're like isn't your

isn't your yeah like they're frustrated a new guy walked in huh new guy what was it like right about to close

nope middle of the day yeah that I don't uh Aviator Nation I have the same I've voiced this before the one on

uh Abbot Kinney it feels like uh it feels like they don't want you in there especially on sundays i get that vibe yeah after it's really rude on sundays yeah um why is that funny i didn't say it was funny at all he's laughing all right we have a we know someone that works there on sundays but i told her that i was like what did he say i was mouthing who it was oh cool yeah um

i told her that and i was like do you know i was like do you know like the only time i went in there i left so quickly it felt like you guys like hated me like my mom and i went in there and it was like it literally felt like you were walking like the cool girls room and they were like pissed that you were there that's funny our mutual friend that works there uh uh was in there and jacob alordi walked in mutual friend what really walked in there with no shoes on and she said they were all like freaking out because they're like that's fucking jacob lord and no one had the balls to like help him because they were usually walking they're like can i help you like find anything but like everyone was scared to talk to him oh i would be

freaking out the hottest man alive yeah well and so she was she was like he's walking or he's walking around like looking for someone to be like yeah whatever and they're all like cowering in the corner and then he walked out barefoot onto abby kinney oh that's i feel like if you're that hot you can do it though but why would you want to be it's kind of gross like what did you stuff on like a needle around here i don't know oh who do you guys think is like the hottest he's up there he's one of the best fucking people um you're looking at him are you taking guys yeah uh he's up there i think uh i think like efron back in the day was one of the hottest guys i've ever seen yeah i feel like um matt healy he's hot i have a crush on him is he really i have a crush

on him i see i some i feel like i understand because he's british i feel like yeah yeah i mean it's definitely not like he's definitely not like the most hot guy of all time but like when he's on stage like yeah i understand it fires me i think i have a good understanding of traditionally attractive guys but then there will be people that girls will be like oh that guy's really hot i'm like i wouldn't have guessed that yeah i wouldn't have known that let's see oh uh uh who's the hemsworth on the the fifth one top row right there over from michael b jordan that guy in rush what's his is that is that liam or chris this is chris so chris hemsworth in look up chris hemsworth in rush chris hemsworth in rush is one of the hottest guys one of the hottest

people i've ever seen yeah wait really yes that hair looks horrible well he's playing a guy who that's his hair kind of looks like chris powers hair yeah i mean chris powers is pretty great then yeah yeah chris powers might be up he's playing he's playing uh who does he play click the oh that's a side by side of him with the real guy go down no over so yeah so james hunt was this f1 guy and he's like notoriously like the biggest playboy in like f1 history like yeah just every woman in the world like loved him at the time in the 70s and uh there's a funny line where nikki lauda who's like him and nikki lauda had a rivalry like in real life and when they're both coming up he nikki lauda gets signed to like some f1 team whatever and

he's at the track and he likes the receptionist that works there and one of the other racers came up to him and goes like yeah i would steer clear of her if you can and he was like why and he's like well she used to date james hunt and apparently uh he's the best lay of all time and that's not an act i would want to follow if i were you like he was like apparently like one of the coolest guys he had it all yeah i have a question what do you think of my glasses i don't like them um maybe put them back on but like push them down a little bit nope no not like like a sexy teacher i want to pull your underwear over your head oh do you no not uh so you have a up a little bit i think i like you in glasses

those ones i do they were too high up before those ones i do not like not like that no how is this too high up I don't know I just found them you can you can pull off glasses those are not the ones so you let me do that

for like half the episode mine I feel like you look good in my blue light ones thank you yeah I wore them recently when you were gone

I was wearing them really yeah oh I have I have one more thing that I want to say before we get into the segments

that I thought was one of the craziest moves I've ever seen anyone do i'm in a family group chat with my family fgc my mom will send texts like funny texts like we would like we will i once i get to it i will react with haha she sends it and then reacts to her own message with haha yeah that's tough that's tough that is um i one time my dad posted on instagram and then immediately was the first comment with the crying laughing emoji and i screenshot it and I sent it to Bobby I was like could be the move

setting the tone in your own comment section well that's like some like Instagram comedians do that really well that they'll like the caption will be whatever the regular caption is and then a bunch of like crying laughing emojis so you like think it's yeah think that it's already like hysterical

funny yeah that's like me commenting on playdates yeah you're always one of the first that's funny guys we've officially partnered with Ricky to bring you the best canned alcoholic beverage on the market Ricky was created to finally give the world a premium spirit-based drink. Ricky is made with award-winning vodka or tequila and just a touch of thirst-quenching fruit.

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It's Labor Day, and that means one thing. I'm going to get Rickied out of my gourd. I'm going to put a couple of those puppies on ice, kick back go to the beach maybe pop them in a cooler and you know just have a killer weekend i'm gonna get like i cannot stress enough i'm gonna get ricky'd out of my freaking mind head to rickyspirits.com to find out where you can get ricky near you follow at friday.beers and at ricky spirits to stay up to date with upcoming ricky contests and giveaways let's get back into the episode we have a fantastic episode for you guys today we're gonna do your pitches then our

pitches lauren do we have someone to prank call yeah i screenshotted one cool i think could be good is it uh housing related sort of okay cool i'll take i don't know what that means uh then we have am i the asshole followed by everyone's favorite segment this guy rocks then we have teach me something and then will and i are gonna do in no particular order folklore that doesn't exist and more slang words that don't exist. Yes, we are. All right, Lauren, let's hear some pitches. What were you going to say, Willie?

Sorry. I said, and your ass ain't ready for what I got. First pitch is from Christian. Atta boy, see? Christian says, hey, Lauren and the baby bears. Nice. Pitch idea. My idea is called the Dreamcast.

We'll have to somehow steal that name from Sega. Sega? Sega. I don't know what that is. They make Sonic. Right? wait like the gas station that's sick go sonic where you get the fast burgers not a gas station they do not have gas at sonic that's a restaurant yeah he just took he just called it a gas station

this is news to me but are you joking now you thought sonic was a gas station yes you thought sonic had gas my entire food my entire life that looks that's the sonic i was talking about the hedgehog the yeah i thought it was like uh i thought it was like cumberland farms nope weird they do have driving you know you can pull in and then they roller skate the food out to you maybe that's where i got i knew cars were involved some there is a car out okay i'll give you that i'll give you that okay so he says um so dreamcast works like this you and your homies plug into a console that sits on your nightstand and allows you guys to access each other's dreams with full control you can pre-pick the dream or randomize to someone's dream and play

like a video game it would probably lead into weird sex stuff we can flush that out with a few patches and updates love the pod keep it up i like it i think that it would be weaponized within the first week of it launching yeah i don't so you can actually control someone else's dream or you can go experience a dream they had i think like i'm a character in your dream and i'm playing like as like a first person shooter shooter minus the shooter first person like gta it's like gta so you're dreaming you're doing whatever you're doing in your dream but now i'm a character in it and i can roam but what if i went into yours what if we both use it on each other you wouldn't be asleep oh oh one of them has to be awake i think so i think so lauren does one of them have

to be awake no does that change your mind then yeah so i guess we're both in the same realm yeah like i think it's just like we're in the same server in our dream i like it yeah this reminds me of that black mirror episode um a lot of these do i haven't seen it have you watched much of black mirror there was one where they watched it they would like plug into a video game and they would like oh yeah yeah uh it's where he like keeps those people in in that world he keeps them like trapped in that world no jesse plummins jesse plemmons god jesse plemmons like makes them be part of his like weird sci-fi fantasy i love jesse plemmons he's fantastic who is that i would let him let he looks like matt damon that's just not

true what that's totally true oh this guy he played young no this is a different when his like first role as a kid was young matt damon he looked yeah see how he's like a they're all in this weird like star trek thing i don't i don't actually don't think i've seen this one no this one's crazy he looks like uh um jet like the pookie pookie jet yeah yeah oh that's funny wait put jesse plumbin's young matt damon it's i guess i'm not arguing what child just no i know but i just think it's i think it's cool if they have the oh where is it oh he kind of does look like oh yeah that i think that's the um why are they making the exact same face yeah look at that okay yeah i'll that's not even a young one no that's like matt damon's irish cousin yeah yeah well

i think matt damon's irish okay well like extra irish yeah yeah like ginger whoa lauren just used the g word hey i'm only they can use that word all right next pitch what up ginger you guys are you guys aren't gonna like this one but i like it oh great what is it like shopping or something hey lauren and her girl bosses oh this is from frank and carnado oh crazy i like how sometimes you like you'll be like we need to use an alias then you just use that guy's full name no the am i the asshole oh i thought these were all fake names no pitches it's oh yeah okay but also i'm stevens i have a pitch that's gonna blow you away what's the worst part about investing in lots of little guy that does a thing style products oh god what's

the worst part about it i don't care that it's too little of a guy that it's a derivative it's yeah it's it happens a lot and you have to like house them like they're a guy that you have now have to take they have to poop pee do they have to pay for their college he says that's right it's having two the problem is having too many little guys running around your life well introducing lieutenant little guy a little guy that keeps the rest of the little guys on task and well-behaved you no longer have to worry about your little guys breaking things around the house not completing their assigned tasks or generally causing chaos who's getting a bit of this frank caliendo frank incarnado okay frank i love you i will i want to stress that this is

getting out of hand it's uh this is more lauren's fault today i agree this is we talked about how enough enough little guys we get them i like and lauren literally why lauren introduces lieutenant little guy. It's the little guy of all little guys. It's the littlest guy I can imagine. I'm furious right now, Lauren. But Frank, I like it. Okay. Well, that's why...

Look at how mad I am. Well, I did pick a third pitch because I knew you guys were going to freak out about that one. Called it. We did. I just wanted to read it because I thought it was funny. Thanks, Frank. Agree to disagree. Thank you, Frank. All right.

This is from Jack Wetzel. What, Wetzel? Hi, Rusty, Will, and Lauren. I've got a life-changing pitch here that I think... I have an idea. I already know what it is. It's a pretzel restaurant. Wetzel's Pretzels.

That would be great. I hope he pitches that. That's a real thing, right? I think so. Nice. There was a kid, Nick Wetzel or something Wetzel, that was the mascot in... At BC? No, at Academic Magnet High School.

He's a giant textbook. He's Remy the Raptor. we were the raptors there we go all right he says what is the worst part of having a primo case of ice cold crispy beers in the fridge let's think about it well what's the word a primo case of ice cold crisp i can't think of one bad uh it takes up a lot of space in the fridge and then like your fridge is now a beer fridge uh oh oh oh uh everyone takes them that's right running out with my new invention bluetooth play on bluetooth you'll never have an empty case of beer in your fridge again with our patent pending smart cardboard bluetooth beer cases bluetooth will

sense when your case is running low and order your or in order you in a replacement pack of your preferred brew of choice it works with grubhub uber eats instacart and we'll send you a text when it orders a new case looking for 1.2 mil to get off the ground yeah yeah that's good well i believe i like that a lot i believe amazon has the buttons is that what it is yeah but that that is the same as me just opening my phone this is like because you kind of think you have more beer than you actually yeah yeah so when you get down to like five yeah you think you have like 10 but in reality you just have a couple yeah it'll order a new one automatically yeah i mean i think that's great yeah i love it i mean that should that would be good technology for like fridges

like it has that's why i feel like shit like this exists like doesn't have amazon doesn't do anything that's like completely automated i don't you might have it on like a schedule it's not bluetooth well yeah we know bluetooth fridges exist is that a thing did you ever see that guy his girl is he blocked his girlfriend his ex-girlfriend and everything and she was texting his fridge that's the only way she could get in touch with him that's great um we should get a fridge in here i know with like tuna oh yeah oh oh we have um we're getting a new studio can we talk about this yeah we're getting a new studio we're moving offices and we're getting a new studio in like a month month and a half probably like a month yeah uh but we've been

solicited to like if we had any like ideas for the new studio so let us know yeah do you guys have any ideas of like like we could totally rethink we could be like sitting at a table I hate the table idea I think this chair vibe is good I don't want chairs that sink me so much I don't want I don't want to read comments about my gooch every week I think we should get you longer shorts

These are Longer than your shorts right now Not true Stand up Mine are down to my knees His are much longer Much longer? Yeah

They're the same length What do you, like, are you, do you have... Do I have what? No, his are... They're right above his knees. What does she have? What does she have, Will? That's much longer.

You're pulling mine up. You were like, look, they're much longer. No, I'm not. No, I wasn't. They both go to our knees. What are you talking about? I... Are you having...

Is this like a cognitive dissonance thing? I don't know what that means, but... Will wanted to use cognitive dissonance. But they were... We just stood up next to each other. His are touching his kneecaps. Same. No, they're not.

We don't need to... Nobody... I don't... It doesn't really... Oh, yeah, they kind of are the same. Oh, why does it matter this much? Because I'm dying on this hill because I get all these gooch comments every week and it's starting to get to my head. You know what's crazy is I flash just as much, I feel like, but I don't get any heat.

They were touching my knees. Oh, whatever. Why are you not? I just don't like, you're not wearing headphones right now. Do you know how frustrated that would be from your perspective? It's just my opinion. It's not an opinion thing, though. That's why it's annoying.

I guess they are objectively touching his knees, but they do it in a different way. Yeah. Like, yours are, like, kind of floating down. Mine are there. Mine are concrete there. I agree. Yours are kind of, like, trickle-down banging.

Banging. All right. Should we hear some... Oh, we got to pitch each other. Presented by Cash App. It pays to get paid on Cash App. I've got a killer one today. Okay.

We all know about the Sneaky Link, right? we're all familiar with it kind of that yeah yeah i'm familiar i've never had one but what does that mean i actually don't is that i think it's like i think it's like no no no it's like you're you're like kind of seeing someone but it's like discreet and maybe they just come over at night and you like don't really tell your friends about it whatever and this you like tiptoe around with them yeah yeah you're always like you're solving clues okay this is the honest link it's social media for your exes okay so you can go on their page and there's a box that you can check if you would get back together with them but it doesn't notify them unless it's both both of you have it

checked wasn't this also didn't you have a very similar idea i had one that was like it was like hooking up with your friends yeah um but that was months ago yeah that was great yeah uh and so it kind of takes all the awkwardness out of like putting yourself out there and being like i want to get back together uh and them not feeling the same way yeah i love it thank you the honest link the honest link sneaky link is what i call when i eat a uh a bratwurst at night or something i had a sneaky i had a bratwurst yesterday i bet you did did you you didn't do my idea then have i not told you this this would have been so perfect because you take a picture of it and posted it for the caption

Brought Summer. I've been wanting to do that all summer. You've never told me that. We can make that happen today. It's a pretty easy thing to do. I just haven't remembered it well. I'm at a place that has Brought Worst. I went to the ultimate Brought Worst place.

Worst Coochie? What does that mean? I was in Solvang. I went to Solvang. It's definitely Worst Cooch. Worst Coochie would be the worst. coochie no no worst coochie would be i swear to god because i went to worst coochie and everybody knew you i went to worst coochie and you they said you were the mayor i was

wait that place is not worst coochie definitely worst cooch worst coochie would be literally Worst Coochie Let's see Worst Coochie Worst Coochie So I'm closer to mine than yours You're right, you're correct I was wrong, I was wrong

But that's insane that they call it that So there's a place, yeah They used to call Will Worst Coochie in high school Because that's all he hooked up with was the Worst Coochie I felt gross about that one No, it's fine Yeah, I was hooking up with a ton of girls Anyway

so what was your pitch on the honest oh no we have yours what's yours oh okay yeah yeah this is it's a new concert venue it's called Castle on a Hill

or something like that Ed Sheeran has a song called Castle on a Hill yeah he's the biggest investor he's got his face everywhere okay no I don't know I mean yeah

I also don't think that that's like he doesn't like have like the IP to that isn't that like it's from like a fairy tale no it's just a side comment oh okay

sorry Castle on the Cloud maybe cool okay Les Mis There is a castle on a cloud I didn't see it. I haven't either.

Okay. Scorch, one of the 15 things you've seen is It's a play. That doesn't count. Or musical. Okay, anyway. It's a concert venue. Here's my thing.

Think about every concert venue right now. And I understand that most of them are just repurposed sports venues. so they're stadiums with a stage at the bottom and then it kind of goes up and you're like up looking down but i think at a concert it's cooler to be looking up than down figuring it so my idea is it's like a reverse stadium where the band is on a stage in the middle yeah and then all the seats are like tiered but up so that you're looking up at the band up on a stage above you that's cool kind of like you remember like kanye on his like saint pablo tour he had like the floating stage so but what are the like nosebleeds there what do they call the nosebleeds the the

bunkers yeah or something or like the wormholes yeah i don't understand the logistics of this imagine imagine a hill yeah but i don't know i don't think this would work i can't what do you what do you mean well if you're way at the bottom like there's going to be all those people and yeah but all the seats are reclined i mean you would say the same thing about a normal stadium no because it is visible everywhere if you are truly at the bottom you might know but it's at an are they on a translucent stage no no no point they're hanging over the edges they're all in ropes and they're hanging off this no they're like leaning over the edge okay face melting someone all right i guess i have it i guess if you think

if it's like a 20 000 person thing that might be an issue but it's like a smaller event yeah no i like it like i think for like a thousand people you could do it in a way where like everyone would still have a good view and it'd be kind of a fun thing where they're like the focal point in the middle and you can sit all around it maybe this sucks no it's it sounds great i could i think lauren's just picturing too steep of a hill yeah yeah yeah but now i'm picturing that because she was picturing it and now i'm seeing a lot of issues with my oh oh willie what if uh what if the people are on a are on like a roller coaster track it's just like a totally different idea go around seeing them from all different angles okay yeah maybe that could be yours for next week

okay two years and that was pitches presented by cash it pays to get paid on cash app and i always say that i've literally been i had that i have that tattooed on my chest yep he does okay guys let's take a minute to talk about cash app you probably know cash app is the place to send people money like when you just settle up with your friends after a night out on the town we're here to tell you that cash app actually has a lot more to offer don't overlook cash app like will was overlooked every year of his life cash app is the place for a faster simpler way to manage your money you can start saving with as little as one dollar as there are no minimum balance requirements with cash app savings you can get the most of your money with no hidden fees and no account fees

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Should we hear some prank calls? We field prank calls. Do you want to do prank calls before AITA? What? Do you want to do a prank call before? Sure. All right. Well, I sent you guys one if you want to look at it.

Okay. It is, this person said, can you prank call my girlfriend Alessia? She has a roommate who apparently cooks a bunch of food that smells like shit. act like you're the leasing office and say there have been multiple complaints about her apartment smelling like rotten or bad smelling food yeah and the neighbors have been complained multiple times that's so good okay lauren put all the stats on a google doc on the tv please all the stats those are the only stats i have the stats yeah all right we're gonna prank call this girl named alessia apparently she cooks no no her roommate oh but that doesn't matter okay because you don't

know that because you're just the lead you don't know okay cooking it so apparently apparently alessia's roommate cooks really like stinky food and so we're gonna call pretend to be from the leasing office and say that numerous tenants have complained about the smell of the food that she needs to get better at cooking yeah or like yeah yeah let me just start with like saying the complaints about the smell of the food because if you say she needs to get better at cooking She's going to immediately know it's a prank. Also, the boyfriend, Liam, said that she might not answer because she doesn't answer spam calls that much,

but we can try a couple times. Okay. Wait, who am I? I'm Mark from the... Mark. Mark from the leasing department of the building. Department. The building department of the...

This is scary. From the leasing office. Hey, this is Mark from the leasing office. Or the build... Yeah, something. Wait, now it's calling a different number. That's not her number. Why is he doing this?

I know, that's how it does it. Okay. We do this less. In Toronto, every arrival is a statement, and nothing says it better than this. Cadillac Optic was the number one selling luxury EV in Canada for 2025. Find your rhythm across a seamless 33-inch display and an immersive 19-speaker AKG surround audio system.

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Damn it. Call her back? Yeah. How do I... Okay. It might come from a different number. I don't know how this service works. I think it might be...

I think it's like a different random number. Oh, no, no, it isn't. It's probably so bad. all right all right that was our prank call segment um aita yeah so is that is that just what it's gonna be if they don't answer we're just i mean we unless we have yeah i think that's fine all right every once in a while we'll connect yeah That was the prank of... Guys, if you have...

Please submit homeowner-style ones to us. We're trying to get a hold of people, but sometimes it's... We got off to a hot start. It was easy. I know. The first two were so good. They're not all going to be hits. It's okay.

Am I the asshole? Am I the asshole? Am I the asshole? All right. This is from Stephanie. She says, hello laura and the spice meisters nice long time playmate and big fan of the pod spice meisters i love that am i the asshole for not warning a lady that i nibbled her pizza before she paid for it

and took it home i nibbled her pizza yeah all right yeah sorry yes i can't wait to hear on my way home from a final exam i got my boyfriend to order a pizza so i could grab it on the way home i was starving so i picked it up and got into the car where i snuck a few nibbles i brought the pizza home and realized it was the wrong order the ticket said sarah which is not me i drove back to the pizza place with sarah's order and asked to grab my correct order as i'm about to walk away with my pizza sarah walks in with her three kids and starts paying for their order i was about to say something but i truly didn't want to deal with it so i walked out and got back in my car as i drove away seconds later i saw sarah and the chillins walking to

her car with the pizza but had a hole in it the size of my mouth should i have warned them or is this on one of the employees that's on one of the employees why would they or maybe why'd you give them the pizza back she probably it was probably one of those like uh racks where you just like grab your order yeah probably just put it back up that's what i'm picturing yeah you shouldn't have put it back up why'd you put it back up you ate it that's great i mean at that point i would have just been like okay i'm eat this is what i'm eating same like once you've taken a bite out of it yeah especially if it was your fault that you grabbed the wrong one if they gave you the wrong one then you could go back and be like i took a bite but rose it's the wrong i think it's wild

that she drove all the way back i would have just eaten it i know i wonder what the types of pizza were also yeah that's crazy you're i think you're a bad person for that those poor kids well they're gonna get home they're gonna open the pizza they're gonna see there's a bite in it they're gonna call the pizza place they're gonna ream some high school kid out who's working there for who doesn't deserve it um someone's probably gonna get fired bills aren't gonna get paid the place will probably then the person who gets fired will come back with a vengeance and burn the place down yeah the night yeah you you really fucked this pizza place geez um that's actually really i mean i just don't understand why you put it back yeah i can't believe you even went back

um yeah i don't think you're the asshole i think you it was just like gross negligence no i think you're the asshole well i don't think she thought about it she was there when sarah walked in i think that's where you go okay all right hand up yeah i took a bite out of the pizza yep yeah tell the employees but how did the employees not have looked at it yeah they let they let a stranger walk in and put a pizza box on their thing yeah that's like i don't think once you leave the restaurant with it they shouldn't then serve that to anyone you're not even allowed to if i put the food on the wrong table and no one touches it i'm not allowed to bring it to another table if i'm a waiter yeah that's crazy um okay like are you i love you i love you you're

the asshole you might be the asshole and i love you too and then she's coming from a place of love we want you to get better we want you to grow we want to be a bigger how did you not notice you were eating the wrong flavored pizza well that's the other question is like how well i i can't picture what the types of pizza were they were similar enough to where you ate some of it yeah But different enough to where you were like, I have to go back. Yeah. Maybe it was like a gluten-free situation where she couldn't tell. Oh, my God.

Yeah, you just killed some kid with celiac, too. Wow, this is interesting. Well, no, they still got the right pizza. Yeah, that's true. She died from celiac. She's writing this on her deathbed. Yeah, Will and I love you, and Lauren loves you. Lauren looks iffy.

I think you might be the asshole but more I don't I think what's her name again Lauren? Stephanie Stephanie it doesn't sound like

you did this maliciously it sounds like you just weren't thinking it's just eco-terrorism you gotta be you gotta be more aware of your

like actions yeah how did you if you were unaware enough that you were eating a pizza that is not

the correct flavor well yeah that's what I'm and then you put it back Not to beat a dead horse here, but I can't, I wish I kind of knew what kind of pizzas we were talking about. Yeah. Give her, can we call her?

Pizza girl? Yeah. Pizza party at your house. I went just to check it out. Is this a song? 19 extra large is what a shame. No one came. Just us eating all alone.

You said take the pizza home. No sense letting all this go to waste. so then i face pizza all day and every day there's cheese around the clock it's getting me blocked but i sure don't care for irregularity so tell me why'd you have to go and get me so constipated oh nice really been a major inconvenience on my bladder and i really hate it my bowels and i really In the bathroom I scream and I grunt and I groan And I twist and I pull

I pull I twist and I pull That's Weird Al Yankovic for you I'm so tired What's new? I had a busy, busy weekend Working for the weekend like usual I don't think she's going to answer

Working on the weekend Stephanie, text us You're the asshole yeah text us what kind of pizza I'm so confused but yeah that might be our first time I think of playmate as an asshole generally pretty forgiving on this

I don't think that's true alright next one is from Bradley alright Brad Bradley says hey Lauren and the rat gang I live in a house where most of the people don't know each other when they first get here so I try to

get to know the guys when they move I know, wait, I'm not. So the possibilities are... It's like a halfway house. I was going to say the same thing. Halfway house, hostile, uncool frat house. Like, everyone else is coming in and out, but he's not. He's the...

He's just described... He's like Jerry's house. He doesn't think we know what dorms are. He says, there's a new guy that moved in recently. We will call him Antonio. Antonio is a pretty chill guy, so i invited him out with some friends the day after i met him so we could get more acquainted with the area however now that we've become more friendly he's always asking what i'm doing when i

leave the house and when i'm going out with my friends again also if i ever get into a seemingly small conversation with him it ends up turning into something that lasts over an hour am i the asshole if i stop telling him when i'm going out with my buddies whenever he asks also side note the first time we went out together he started talking to a girl my buddy was on a date with for an extended period of time because he found out they went to the same college yeah uh no you're not the asshole and i actually think that anyone who's like what's his name antonio yeah people like antonio make me so uncomfortable where like you have to avoid running into them because it's like oh great now i gotta now i got an hour and a half conversation

with antonio yeah i mean i will say like to antonio's in antonio's defense like the fact that you extended the olive branch and like invited him out like it's reasonable that he would assume that agree that would be a recurring thing so you're gonna have to phase him out and it's not gonna be easy but i think it's totally valid so but here's the problem will is like he was trying to do a nice thing and like if he didn't i think sometimes it's it's it's known like i'm doing this because you're new and whatever yeah like it clue didn't go that great the first time but i think antonio probably woke up like that was a killer night like i don't think he's aware yeah so i'm just saying you gotta like yeah operate under the assumption that he doesn't know

that he's annoying yeah you phase him out and you yeah just avoid him a little bit i think and then like or you you you could those guys know pretty quickly once you start treating them like we're not best buddies like he'll get the hint after a little bit or you could do the super glue in his bed so he can't get out yeah you're not an asshole just like be friendly like so what are some solutions that he could use really um gorilla glue super glue duct tape duct tape something that keeps him physically stuck in his bed handcuffed yes yes you uh you should handcuff him to his bed i think he'll get the hint he might get a different hint yeah um okay well the thing he said at the end about oh we started talking to my like buddy's girl i

feel like maybe don't read into that too much yeah they went to the same college like i feel like that if depending on what the college is like that would be a reason to like especially if it's a small school yeah i don't know that does that in and of itself without context doesn't strike me as anything bad yeah i agree yeah i just know i have a guy like that and i understand the annoyance the guy that went to college no a guy that like antonio one constantly wants to do stuff and we're not buddies like that yeah and uh i i have not gotten him to get the hint yet so i don't know yeah no you're not dazzled but just uh yeah just phase him out nta but just treat him with dignity because he probably isn't aware

yeah yeah i also wonder what it must be a halfway house right no i don't think it's probably some sort of like you know like where like drew and jerry and those guys live it's like a big house with a bunch of rooms and there's just like tenants coming in and out oh okay interesting you know what I mean like a shared living yeah or it's like if it's like

at a college maybe too um alright should we do this guy rocks like a halfway house means he got out of prison right

no halfway house sometimes is like it could be prison it could be like addiction so it's like a lot of like sober living

yeah it's not it doesn't mean they're like it's not like it's not like a crazy we said out for drinks too so

no you just said out that's why I was like waiting to hear I don't know Guys, Will and I want to take a second to let you guys know about our new sponsor, Everyman Jack. All right, here's a true story. Before we knew Everyman Jack was sponsoring Playdate, Rusty and I found a box of their product on our co-worker's desk last week. We stole a bunch of stuff out of it and made a pact to not tell anyone.

So I have been using their body wash and deodorant for like a week now. We thought it was a heist. Then we found out today they're sponsoring the podcast. We were allowed to take it. so we have perhaps the best personal endorsement that it was so good we stole it uh which we don't recommend yeah you should buy it you should buy it but i'm currently wearing the sandalwood deodorant i'm wearing i don't know is that the red one no mine's like green okay i wear the red one and then i use the uh brown body wash i have been using everyman jack since i was a kid i love

everyman jack it has my name in it for those of you that don't know that my real name is jack but it's legitimately the best smelling thing on the market everymanjack we love it you're gonna love it guys please give everymanjack a shot today and go to everymanjack.com and use code playdate at checkout for 20 off your first order that's everymanjack.com code playdate at checkout for 20 off your first order again it's so good that will and i stole it let's get back in the episode so my this guy rocks is special this week because most of them are because it's us oh it's so lauren before you click this don't we rock uh someone sent a video of will and i on an airplane and i it just came across my desk they took without us knowing uh i i mean i can't

imagine either of us knew it but this is a live look there's a live look at will and i on a flight recently together are you serious for the audio listeners it's a douchebag in first class treating a regular economy passenger like a piece of shit pinky up it says walking past someone in business class and they're doing that thing that we've all experienced when you walk through first class where they're just like the people in first class are for some reason like glaring at you yep yep and like acting like they're better but uh so you think those guys rock i just thought i don't i thought it was like i thought it was funny and i thought it was like an inaccurate uh because i you're so out of touch i'm the guy i'm 99 of the time i'm i'm back with you oh yeah you're you

always talk about how you're sitting in the back of planes that's like a big topic you bring up a lot is how you're not sitting right at the front i was thinking about this i've created a real hole for myself where you just dug two more trenches today no i mean if a if a playmate sees me at the airport and i'm sitting anything but i'm gonna get flamed yeah they're gonna think the podcast is going downhill yeah all right i slacked mine to brian lauren what are you doing over there she's like texting what do you know i'm not have you never been a part of this podcast lauren lauren well it's just like this is the one segment we like need her to be i am all right i'm i'm on top of it i know i was just your name i was just freaking out i'm sorry i know it's okay all right

ready this is anton drake the vampire anton drake the vampire this is just gonna be great it's very quick i all right well do you want to just describe to the audio which is really dripped out guy turning around and doing a kung fu kick and his name's Anton Drake the vampire he's son of the dragon now and forever he's living his best unlife so guys like this

will rock they rock but do you think that Antoine Antoine would be a crazy name for this oh Antoine would be crazier than Antoine Drake the vampire yeah well like Antoine is like an old white guy's name Antoine is like

a young black guy's name Oh, I didn't know that. Antoine Randall-El? I'm kind of scared of this guy. Do you think that this guy believes that he's a vampire? I think there's a strong, strong possibility. He's at least semi-convinced he's of vampiric origin. Did this man just pop up on your Explorer?

Yeah, my Explorer page is getting pretty good. Mine's only stuff like this. Yeah, I'm pretty excited. What's that new guy, like Van Trund? Van Trund? would you guys rather be a vampire or a werewolf vampire werewolf well a vampire i have some sort of control over it uh werewolf is just every time it's dark i'm a different i know but i think running around as a wolf would be so fun you can't go out anymore though as a wolf you can

i could go play in the forest i'd rather run around as a wolf than go out yeah oh oh you mean like go out to bars yeah i would way rather oh yeah run around as a wolf any day of the week i can't find this guy you can get on like the highest mountains yeah yeah and eat bunnies yeah okay wait kill little critters lauren i have a new one i'm gonna slack it to brian this guy that guy kind of reminded you would starve to death i'd be a vegetarian you couldn't they're carnivores i'm pretty sure well i'd be different this guy kind of reminds me of uh of the guy you just showed me this is this is along the same lines okay so this this guy this is a character introduction of a new character this guy's doing he's wearing a you'll

just you'll see character introduction versalord versalord can we take the wheel thank you I am Versalord. As I look similar to him, to Versalord, I am Existence Incarnate, but you may call me Versa if you want to. my real name is vincent godinson or really godonison versatile son of verse i have all the superpowers that are possible so we can't watch all this four minutes long we're not watching it does seem overpowered that's enough but like what is he even yapping about i can't even understand a word that's kind what i'm talking about is like these guys truly believe yeah that they are something else well that was versalord right that is versalord okay he goes versalord you can take the win he goes i

may look similar to um we don't know who that is um all right do you guys want to do teach me something yeah yes all right i have a will themed one today it's me themed it's about slugs oh nice okay did you guys know that slugs are attracted to beer so if you put like if you put like a bowl of beer out on your like lawn yeah like you like i do for you sometimes yeah yeah exactly at the end of the day it'll be like filled with slugs they can smell the like yeasty they're like attracted to the yeasty aroma and they can smell from like 200 yards away and they all come but the why is everyone dropping their phone and uh and and but the problem is once they get in they get like alcohol poisoning or they like drown oh and so it's like this guy

my phone went off this is fucking pandemonium it's kind of a powerful metaphor this guy yeah exactly this guy posted a video of it and then he just has this bowl of dead slugs now and all the comments were like okay but now what like what yeah like what's the point like yeah interesting science experiment but like where do we go from here i wonder like if you did like na beer yeah that would be an interesting sign would they still be attracted they're all they all have man buns yeah they're all yeah they're all wearing flannels they all moved to la um all right will you teach me something la is we interrupting lauren no i heard that whole thing what was the last thing i said

la yeah she was dialed in okay i've got something there's a book written in 18 it was published in 19 1898 okay uh it was called the wreck of the titan i've heard about this this is crazy yeah it was about a fictional british ocean liner called the titan that sinks in the north atlantic ocean after striking an iceberg and this was 14 years before the titanic happened wait what was it called the titan the titan well it was originally called futility but the book in the or the boat in the book was called the titan in it they just they called it they just like called the titanic weird and then they uh reissued it after the titanic sunk and changed some of the stuff about it because it was like too close to home it like wasn't funny anymore oh it was

supposed to be a comedy no no just like it wasn't i don't know yeah it's like it was too too real that's so it's not insane like imagine being the author's like immediately yeah he was a suspect probably yeah yeah were there suspects in the titanic they thought it was an insurance thing because there was also there was this like other boat called like the olympia oh yeah something and they were basically like identical and the guy who owned the guy had taken out like a huge insurance policy on the titanic or something and then like they think they swift switched the ships and that the they the boat that actually went down wasn't the titanic it was the other one because so that he would get all the insurance money why wouldn't he have just taken one out

on the olympia because it was all it was like an old boat that like like presumably was like like going to sink if they kept running it and then they were like the amount of people the amount of like wealth that died with that boat is like insane because a lot of people didn't have like heirs and so they just went down they didn't know when to give all their like stuff to so they're all these like abandoned like trusts and like mansions and stuff like that government got or something no i think they're just like they fell into like disrepair oh i thought that would be but what would be like no that wasn't like a conspiracy that was just like a thing that happened yeah yeah um that's interesting yeah really crazy stuff did i tell you that that i

think i might have said this last week the iceberg that the titanic hit was uh has been around since a thousand bc that's crazy it's that still around i think so oh wow um all right should we do willie do you want to do slang words and that and that is just the tip of the iceberg on our titanic there we go there we go it always fascinated me how the titanic ship like wasn't actually that big like that always what is it was giant at the time at the yeah now now it's like tiny it's like really not a very like cruise ships it like looks it's like a small yacht size comparison or versus cruise liner yeah it was like literally tiny compared wow yeah in my head it was yeah like massive yeah i don't know okay anyway interesting i still cannot wrap my mind around how a cruise

ship floats yeah i don't know it's like it's just like buoyancy i'm not there's no changing my mind on this it's crazy oh yeah i know i'm with you like i it is it is insane but there's so much of that boat that's under the water yes yes uh it is crazy it is crazy oh did you see that fucking yacht that went down no no what you haven't heard about this where uh i don't i don't know but it was like somewhere in europe and it was the the co-chair the co-chairman of vice chairman of jp morgan was on it like a bunch of billionaires were on it they were celebrating uh him like winning this giant lawsuit he basically sold his company it was a horrible deal for the company that bought it and they were suing him over it he won and then the

him the lawyer a bunch of other people were on this ship that like it got hit by a water spout which like sounds scary like from a whale there's like a water tornado you've never seen that uh uh it's like there's no way

it should have been able to sink this giant yacht and uh it went down in like two minutes oh my god like 15 minutes

they all died a handful of them died a mom got off with her like one year old or one month old baby like a handful of them got off wow

um but uh it was at like four in the morning so like no one was awake to do anything by the time they realized the shit they were all sleeping on it yeah and uh yeah horrible story but like they think something

they think people are getting investigated for like criminal negligence because it was like there's no way this ship could have gone down um jesus yeah all right do you want to do slang words that don't exist or folklore that doesn't exist first will let's do folklore all right start us off buddy all right this is folklore that doesn't exist uh do you know about the man who taught birds to fly no a long long time ago birds couldn't fly there were no such thing as birds and there was a there was a very old wise old man who lived on top of a a big mountain with a big cliff yep and he one night had this crazy dream of birds and kind of this premonition that these things were destined to exist and that they would squawk and

fly and flap their wings for generations to come but he didn't see you know them happening so every morning he would wake up he'd pour himself a tea and he would walk up to the cliff and throw squirrels off and after years one of the squirrels flew right away yeah and that was the first bird yeah wow people thought he was nuts for the first couple years oh my god yeah there were like a million like animal abuse lawsuits yep um this was like the 60s for the record yeah have you ever heard about jack and the lean stock no so jack his mom sends him into town to sell their cow and he comes back with these magic beans and she's like what the hell like that i sent you to get money for him so he plants it and he climbs this giant beanstalk grows out

of the ground he climbs the top there's a bunch of soundcloud rappers up there drinking lean oh yes yeah and then he became uh young lean yes that's the origin story yes that makes sense jack and the lean stock yeah um do you know about how evergreen trees came to be oh no so every tree used to be seasonal back in the day but there's an old man in italy in the countryside who didn't like how the how the trees would turn gray in the winter and so he went out one winter and every day He went out with a bucket of green paint And he painted the trees every single day And the next winter

When the winter time started They just stayed green I think we took different approaches to this Maybe Wait anything good Yeah how's Instagram Lauren I'm not on Instagram What are you on then

LinkedIn No I'm sorry I was responding to a text I'm paying attention It's just like I just need someone to look at sometimes yeah yeah and i'm right here all right fine it's like when you're on like a date you guys are on a date you've never been on a date i'm the waitress yeah imagine me like at the waitress like hey hey you're leaving us alone over here

on a date yeah that's almost worse the waitress is on her fucking phone the entire time oh where's our food lauren time uh have you heard have you heard of ryan cashew wait what did you you say so the entire time not the entire time you ever heard of ryan cashew tree no johnny appleseed's uh significantly less famous brother and he was convinced that the cashew was going to be the next big nut uh when america started and so he went around he planted a bunch of cashew trees and uh it didn't work out it didn't work out that is a bummer to hear yeah i'm sorry he went to that um okay i've got do you know about the strongest fish that ever lived okay so you know a lot of people say that the tides come from the moon but the ancient crimpoleans didn't believe

that they believed that uh the the tide didn't used to change and then one day there was a very very buff strong fish that spent his whole life working out in the ocean floor gym and got very strong and all he wanted to do was go and live like the people lived so every day every 12th hour he would take the biggest swim he could and he'd move the whole ocean as far up as he could and he never made it to land but his continued efforts can created this pendulum of the tides that now is nice why the tides happen yours are a lot better than mine today um i don't know about that do you guys know about the boy who cried at everything no so he's similar to the boy that cried wolf but he just cried he would cry at everything he would cry at like minor inconveniences

do you think the boy who cried wolf cried no yes yes no uh he didn't it was it was like cry yeah yep that's okay this sounds like me before i got on my lexapro literally i haven't cried what's lexapro anti like anxiety oh nice um wait why do you why are you on lexapro do you have anxiety wait um yeah you do not want to hang out with the boy who cried did everything wait that okay yeah sorry i didn't know i didn't know if i hijacked it no you definitely don't want to hang out with him okay do you know about the you know about why bears hibernate no there was one bear many many years ago who went who was um

being such a menace to the village and attacking the villagers and the villagers were like we got to get this bear to chill the fuck out and so instead of you know shooting it because that would be inhumane they got those like dog cbd gummies and they gave them like a ton yeah but one of them accidentally had a bunch of thc in it too bear got baked went to bed woke up eight months later and was like that was fucking awesome told all the other bears about it and uh yeah now they all take a bunch of cbd yeah the bears are just baked yeah uh do you know about the swear wolf yep the swear wolf uh he roams like suburban neighborhoods and he teaches all the kids how to swear oh and that's why kids think swearing is cool it's because there's a swear wolf walking

around telling him that it's cool i wonder if like it's a it's a money thing where then because then he robs the swear jars yes so he teaches him how to swear exactly cash in later when they do it that's great yeah um do you know about the first rat to infest a building lauren cover your ears um the first rat to ever infest a house and or office place um just really really wanted a job he was like broke his rat community was broke and so he kept showing up to work every day trying to get a job yeah and people just started gluing him to stuff and uh so no one ever reported back he never reported back because he got caught in a glue trap so then all the other rats were like holy shit he got a job yeah then they started going and so every time we kill a rat it's just

another rat who's looking for a job that doesn't know what happened to the last rat he tried that's crazy yeah that's folklore that doesn't exist i got one more oh sorry yeah uh do you know about the sat bridge troll uh he similar to the bridge troll that you have to answer his riddles three this one uh to pass his bridge you have to take the sat for him so that he can get into college and he doesn't have to keep being a bridge troll yeah that's kind of big that'd be a big development i know he'd be the first uh be the first troll to ever get to a nest uh okay those were fun those are fun i like them now we've got slang words that don't exist these are slang words that don't exist i got glass yep something goes very smoothly like how was the ride over here oh

it's glass we hit every single every single green light so glass was one of my slang words from our last language segment really yep what did it got you can see right through oh shit it's cool it is cool i'm going to make some calls and it's my bad okay maybe we will um at volvo safety is not a feature it's our purpose rigorous crash testing decades of learning from real accidents innovations that help prevent accidents before they happen and help protect you when they occur going above and beyond industry standards a vision of zero collisions volvo's legacy revolves around you because safety is about helping to keep you and everyone around you safe for life learn more at volvocars.ca slash safety we'll talk about it later uh all right i've got wreck like some it's

like it's like short for like wreck league like if something's like like kind of childish and like not yeah very high level high stakes like yeah it's wreck i like that puzzle uh when you wake up and you don't really know what happened last night yep last night was a puzzle like you're trying to put the pieces back together and then kind of missing some spots start with the edges yes yep uh lofted is is like like some sort of like something that would be really high like it's not uh it's not something that you're gonna achieve right now but it's it's kind of like a goal i like it like yeah i want you know i would love to own a coffee shop someday that's lofted but i'll get there i like that yeah um oppenheimer it's a guy who comes in and blows up the

conversation and makes it whatever he wants to talk about yep uh i hate talking that guy he's he's an oppenheimer he's an op yeah yeah even though he he meant well he didn't know they were going to drop the bomb yeah uh cream and sugar cream and sugar is something that is kind of superfluous like it's not you don't need it but it can be a nice little touch oh yeah that's cream and sugar yeah it's cream and sugar or you know you can also use it the other way around if someone is like like it's not like it's not necessary someone's like what if on the way to the amusement park we stop at the big donut store yeah like that's cream and sugar let's just go to the amusement park i like i mean i like that a lot uh boulder someone who's solid

you know they're gonna be there you can count on them yep guy's a boulder he's boulder yeah yeah uh pitch uh something that's like right uh uh exactly what you needed in that moment like it's like like on pitch like vocally so it's like oh that's pitch love like um yeah wearing those shoes like those are pitch they fit in they're perfect with your outfit kind of you know what i mean nice uh this one's bad i'm sorry don't apologize i would like an apology helen of troy it's like that girl that like your buddy is willing to get back with no matter what like even if she like would compromise the whole situation like it might not be great and it's gonna have like dire consequences but that's just hell but he just keeps going back yeah yeah yeah

uh my last one is rub and and you remember what it means and i don't remember what it means now i'm just thinking of like a rubbing tug maybe like you meant like dry rub like on a steak no no i think it's a guy he's like he's a bit of a rub yeah he's uh he can be fun but he has the ability to irk people and kind of rub you the wrong way. I like that. He's a bit of a rub. He's not a bad guy. He just can be a bit of a rub. Beautiful.

Slang words that don't exist? Slang words that don't exist. I think our drafts were the best we've ever had. That was tough for Jackson to that and for William. Alrighty, should we do our personality segment? Yep. And then we have an announcement. Yep.

Whose personality are you stealing this weekend? Rusty. i oh i'm gonna steal frank lloyd wright's personality because i'm getting really into legos and i think that i'm gonna get either the hogwarts express or the globe or the titanic this weekend and just go to town on it so that's whose personality i'm gonna steal you know they make frank lloyd wright lego sets you can get like falling water and shit they call like his famous what yeah wait what is from falling water it's like the most famous oh i feel like it's all one word insane what i said it's all one word you just immediately did it too hard wait oh i didn't

hear that oh i have zoned you out house is i i used to have this lego set damn that's fresh um okay i'm gonna steal um i'm gonna steal my my old boss patrick he was a very blue collar union guy when i used to mow lawns and it's labor day weekend so i want to honor the most blue collar guy i know he's to just is that what labor day is about like just like the workers yeah oh nice oh yeah we have friday and monday off yeah lauren i don't have a specific person but i think i'm gonna be drinking a lot this weekend so i need to like rally you'll be john daly this weekend sure john daly i just i i don't i'm not particularly excited i'm excited but where are you going somewhere going to parker arizona twilight it's like it's a bunch i don't know they that was my

last game yeah they do there's like the colorado river runs through there and people have like houses on the rig along the river and like the bars are apparently really fun oh fun that'll be cool yeah all right well you want to tell the playmates our big announcement yeah we have a super special guest coming on we're doing like a special uh hour long something like that interview uh later today when we're recording but it'll come out um in like a week when you're listening to this can't tell you what it is right because we're building hype special surprise special surprise but we have a very exciting guest that i'm thrilled about it will be a bonus episode in addition it'll be yeah it's not going to affect the normal in addition to our regular wednesday

cadence sometime next week it's going to be like an hour an hour long chat 45 minute long chat yeah but um i haven't met him yet take a guess or her who you think it is or her yeah and comment who you think it is all right i love you guys have a great rest of your week Thanks for watching!