Will & Rusty's Playdate - we fought our landlord

Episode Date: September 1, 2025

On yet another viral Playdate, Rusty explains how he fought his landlord, Willy talks middle school showers, and the boys share our fake ID stories. The gang also relives high school nightmares and decide if a flight attendant ITA for telling someone that their breath stinks. Plus, the boys draft fun facts you can use during ice breakers and easy to say someone died. As always, we wrap up with Rusty’s song of the day. FOLLOW OUR SOCIALS: https://www.flowcode.com/page/playdatepod SHOP OUR MERCH: https://playdatepod.shop/ RUSTY’S SONGS OF THE DAY: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/2e5sF4pBj2HBZDoMhymnNf?si=w38C4sjDT6i4OIXq9f_eSg SUPPORT OUR SPONSORS: Download Cash App Today: [https://click.cash.app/ui6m/ba1zl21n] #CashAppPartnerCash App is a financial services platform, not a bank. Banking services provided by Cash App’s bank partner(s). Prepaid debit cards issued by Sutton Bank, Member FDIC. Direct deposit, Round ups, Overdraft coverage and Discounts provided by Cash App, a Block, Inc. brand. Visit cash.app/legal/podcast for full disclosures. Upgrade your wardrobe and save on @trueclassic at trueclassic.com/PLAYDATE ! #trueclassicpod Thank you to our partner TickPick. Download Tickpick today and get $10 off your first order by following this link: https://tickpick.page.link/FridayBeers SUBMIT YOUR BUSINESS PITCH HERE: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSdPHd7Ps9TaX-TOozyLhDpr9Y7pFNMP9PX7cHuLxap1R78GWg/viewform?usp=header SUBMIT YOUR AITA STORY HERE: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSdQElfqdQutn3dzl5HcZfey6YWhbVd-n6XE7FkpfosWZyYhyA/viewform?usp=sf_link 00:00 - Intro 2:06 - Ripping my Landlord 16:31 - Big Dicks 26:03 - Drinking in High School 31:00 - Fake IDs 46:44 - Roadmap 50:09 - More High School Stories 55:00 - Pitches 1:05:48 - AITA 1:09:51 - This Guy Rocks 1:13:22 - Teach Me Something 1:17:24 - Fun Facts You Can Use in an Ice Breaker 1:18:50 - Ways To Say Someone Died 1:19:50 - RSOTD #AlmostFriday #FridayBeers #PlaydatePod Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

New from Nespresso. Blend wellness into your coffee routine with the Coffee Plus range. Infused with functional benefits. Choose the coffee you love with added B vitamins. Like Coffee Plus B12 to help support immune function. And Coffee Plus B6 to keep your day moving. Or go with the flow and choose Ginseng Delight. Our new double espresso with ginseng extract.

Whatever lies ahead, don't change your morning. Let your morning change you. Discover Coffee Plus on Nespresso.com. Guys, we are so excited to announce that Playdate is finally, we landed the white whale, is finally brought to you by our good friends over at Cash App. We're Cash App, we're the Cash App show. Maybe that could be like our intro. Cash App is our, is, it's not Playdate if it's not Cash App.

Cash App, pay me my money. Where my money at? Are we going, Andrew? We are. oh play date andrew look beer probably okay look it's a coffee mug but it says beer probably it's like it's like it's like guilty come on don't talk to me till i've had my morning beer yes amen enjoying a hot cup of joe uh nope frothy cold beer beer one time when our buddy was lashing out for attention he would drink a guinness every morning what you don't remember that you'd have

one guinness at the beginning of the day and be like really gets me going like no it isn't you just want people to be like what you're crazy okay in that instance was yes that does sound like something was doing for attention jackson and i went to jameson's during the middle of the day yesterday and both had a guinness a i'd turn my whole day around just just off the cuff no no i was filming a uh oh yeah yeah which one is andrew andrew andrew yes over you know it's funny uh like a corporate looking guy comes in here yesterday and i'm like hi yeah are you looking for someone he goes andrew and i go oh andrew nelson and start walking him towards your office and he goes no uh kenward that's true i didn't think about that yeah it's like obviously the

guy in the suit no offense it's like what meeting would this guy have i would be i'd love to talk to him i would be i would be a little concerned if andrew's hand handling like corporate business i love we just like walk by him and he's like screaming at someone give me those numbers by tomorrow morning yeah i uh speaking of speaking of screaming at people ripped my landlord a fucking new one oh yeah good for you i had enough i had enough so i called the i called the landlord's office and uh left i wish you could like hear voicemails that you've left it was two minutes of just berating their answering machine over they've just they've fucked up like a bunch of stuff i think i've talked about it over the last couple months and uh and i hang

up and my roommate z was like you're really good at that and i was like yeah i've heard my i've heard my dad like yelled enough people on the phone gets a call get a call back she's like we're gonna get this all sorted whatever i keep like berating her uh she's like well you know what we'll have someone there first thing tomorrow like they're gonna get to the bottom of this like i agree this is fucked up what is the issue the current issue amongst a million other things that have happened in the two months but the current thing is shower won't get hot oven won't get hot stove won't work so i called her and i was like i can take a cold shower every once in a while but where i draw the line is i need to be able to make myself a hot meal i've never never

cooked once but it was like i that's that is fucked up like we need my roommates need to be able to do it whatever and uh she's like you're right that is messed up and i was like it's illegal and she's like it is illegal we're gonna figure this out i'm gonna have a guy there at 8 a.m i'm like good hang up she texted me in the morning she was like yeah you guys haven't been paying your gas bill you don't have you don't even have an account set up this this is your fault and i just was like that can't be right that can't be right and like called my roommates and they were like oh yeah no we did forget to set that up and so i texted her i texted her back and i was like god i apologize for this she just read it and didn't didn't respond which good on her good

on her that one's on us that's the funniest i didn't see that that's so fucking funny i don't get how how do you have like electricity but no gas we all together they are separate there's like an electric i know but usually you pay them like all together through this where it got confusing is we had kind of spread it out so like ty has ty pays for the cleaners and the electric bill and zach plays for the wi-fi and the other thing and then our other roommate used to just handle the gas and then i kind of got off scot-free you don't pay for anything well i like venmo i'm saying like they like everyone has an account yeah whatever or when our other roommate moved out just no one i think everyone thought the other person was doing the gas yeah and so for the last

however many months we just have not been paying our gas bill not even not paying it we don't have an account that's hysterical and so now the like 10 previous complaints that were all valid they're just never going to pick up the phone again yeah yeah it was a boy cried wolf situation a bit it was it was i picked the wrong i picked the wrong time to like have enough yeah like i had enough at the wrong time that's a bummer if i had i should have had enough when they try to kill you with carbon monoxide yeah well that was what i was gonna ask and then yeah so that she i was like what we had a the gas company came over and fixed the leak and she was like yeah they'll still do that even if you don't have they they're legally required to do that and i was like okay i

don't i don't i'll call you later how did you have gas coming in for like carbon monoxide but no maybe there's like a buffer that was like around when your roommate yeah no he was still there so we did have an account when the gas leak happened and then like but like that doesn't change the fact like they still like there are cat burglars on the loose what is you always say cat burglars what does that mean i think it in my head because a burglar is like any like you and i could be like if i if i robbed andrew's house i'm a burglar but if i'm like if i have some sort of a plan and i'm like sneaky and i like cat yeah what's the difference between a cat burglar and a regular burglar also should we do play date play date play date episode 136 136 we'll do the

numbers in a second oh by climbing an upper story so it's how they get into their different word for that okay well then they're actually they're the they're like a groundhog burglar because they went down they went underground they got our underground parking garage why is there a separate word for a thief who enters the building by climbing because that's what i'm saying it's impressive stuff like it's like like anyone can any joe schmoke and rob someone on the first floor but if you if you're robbing like second story third story apartments like you are yeah stealth and agility cat burglars are done so like through upper story windows or rooftops okay a weasel burglar got us someone he burrowed into he burrowed negative floors and got got

people on floor negative one and floor negative two yeah and uh and that still is a problem but because i was so like so wrong about this thing i just don't i don't even i'm like yeah you put all your bolts in the wrong chamber i put all my bolts in the yes i put all my bolts in the wrong chamber bullets bullets well that is good that we have this conversation because jerry my roommate everyone shout out jerry shout out jerry is moving out in like a week and a half and he uh he's uh he handles the gas he lost he really lost some steam there halfway through the sentence yeah i got like we're gonna have no i started thinking about how the new guy moving in hasn't filled out the application yet and i'm like dude if there's a world in which this week he like

pulls out i'm so beyond hosed have you guys been are you already gonna pay double rent no oh why would i pay double rent i thought maybe that sounds horrible i know i thought there was like a do that i thought there was like a buffer maybe between when jerry moved in and when will no no he's supposed to move in september 1 how are you guys gonna handle this double will situation uh the what are you guys both gonna go by will i think i might go by will willie d around the around the house scott's like willie d willie d get in here willie willie maybe i could be willie i don't know how i don't know how to i feel like what age do you become bill it's a really good question my my cousin like how

many old guys named will do you know uh not many not nearly as many as bills yeah my cousin was billy and now i think he he's like 30 he's the oldest cousin so he's 31 and i think he is now officially bill around the office i still call him billy but his office oh my god full of no stuff kind of yes but called his office i don't even know if i should dox this his office was the office that that ceo got caught cheating on the top of the parking garage have you seen that video it was before the before the the concert one there was this there these people are filming and they're like oh my god those people are boning on the top of a parking garage and it was his boss yeah click on this i don't know if i should even be saying this beep beep yeah it's that first one

that was that first one in charlotte yeah don't do it it was a parking garage with this larger building oh i love this lady's content really yeah follow her no i don't okay you get it they were they were on a parking garage and honestly it just kind of looked i wouldn't have thought it was like cheating but the internet works fucking fast now dude have you seen that couple at the Coldplay concert. And they get on the Jimbo Tron. What?

The Jimbo Tron. All right. We got any Jimmies out there? Come on, guys. Wait, all right. 36. Who's 36? Marcus Falk.

Marshall Falk? Maybe. Marshall Falk? I think he was in the 20s. Or was he 45? No. He was the GOAT of NFL Street, bro. marshall falcon nfl street was unstoppable 36 wait i can pull i can pull one out oh marcus smart

maurice jones drew yeah is that true i don't know that's why i guessed it he might be like 28 or something oh frick what crap i was on the cusp of something special someone someone commented i don't think willie knows any of the numbers i think he just uses the obscure name as like a defense mechanism what like trent green google show me trent green show me haha clinton dicks no he he actually might be oh actually show me haha oh that's not who i was thinking of that's a quarterback uh who's that guy trent something google trent running back if trent running back works really fitting last name 34 that was pretty fucking close trump richardson though

i don't know amon green amon green give me that wait i think it's easier for us to try and come up with someone who's 36 years old wait wait oh it's 30 this is who's the year who was like aj dylan wait well he's look at me we can figure this out who is who is like around lebron's age but a little bit younger um i don't know oh steph curry steph curry might be 36 jacob degrom 37 okay kevin kevin durant well that was we already did him last episode double double kd 35 years that's fun that is fun he's that is what this place is all about one over his number i get one more guess i get one more guess i get one more big swing for the fences how about that use it wisely um danny green age

38 fuck fuck fuck i'm totally stumped you're toast i'm not toast they're gonna eat you a no no no no no it's no no no no i could think of i could think of it i could think of it it's um uh mc mend it rashad mendenhall rashad mendenhall rashad i can't believe that's a real player who's almost but don't do steelers i didn't mean obviously i didn't mean when he was on the steelers is he only on the Steelers I mean that was close that was close enough

Rashard Mendenhall would have been the pole of the year oh man I didn't think Jerome Bettis alright we have to be done

but that actually might be right Brandon Jacobs alright you can't just fire from the hip Jerome Bettis the fridge the fridge the boss

who's the fridge william perry william perry i got i got something to say all right i got something to say the south got something to say i cashapped you yesterday and you haven't even said anything i cashapped you 200 and i said love and you haven't commented on it or giving me a kiss hey willie thank you for the cash app i love the cash app me too i'm you know what my this is maybe a a silly reason a little bit because there's a lot of great things to love cash app i love like the the user interface clicking the buttons like they're big and they like light up in a way that's very satisfying to my brain guys if you weren't up to speed already cash app is way more than just a

safe way to send and receive money with the cash app card you can unlock a ton of perks without all the fees enjoy benefits like exclusive early access to nationwide concert pre-sales kendrick lamar the weekend and sabrina carpenter mj lenderman mj maybe mj lenderman i don't know if that's true just to name a couple recent examples plus discounts on everyday purchase and popular brands you've probably are you're probably already spending money on cash app also adds security to your money by declining suspicious card transactions and sending you a notification to make sure the payment is really you. If your card is ever lost or stolen,

you can lock it with just one tap right in the app. Spend with confidence with the Cash App card today. I love Cash App. I'm very excited to be working with them. I've been Cash Apping for a long time. Now I feel like I'm part of the Cash App family. Finally. You guys need to join our Cash App family.

We can be one big family of cash. For a limited time, only new Cash App customers can use our exclusive code to earn some additional cash for real. Just download Cash App and use our exclusive referral code FRIDAY10 in your profile and send $5 to a friend within 14 days and you'll get $10 dropped right into your account. Willie, that sounds to me like $5 free. Terms also apply. Cash App is a financial service platform, not a bank. Banking services provided by cash apps bank partners prepaid debit cards issued by sutton bank member fdic direct deposit overdraft coverage and discounts provided by cash app a block

inc brand visit cash.app slash legal slash podcast for full disclosures i love cat say it with me say andrew you gotta say too i love cash app cash app oh it sounds like a spell cash app let's get back of the episode my dad saw the fridge's penis my dad was in a steam room in chicago one time you know the william he was like a legendary bears lineman yeah but then he would they would give him the ball in like short yardage situations so he like would get touchdowns because he was so huge um and my dad went to a steam room in chicago and he walked in and it was just the fridge sitting there cock out how do you everyone else had towels on how do you know the how do you know the fridge is about to come into the sauna it gets room temp his penis comes in four minutes

before that's how big it is that's awesome i love that line from moneyball is that from oh is that from moneyball he's like his dick comes in a room he comes in like five minutes later you know what my favorite part from moneyball is um we gotta get on base when you're a mid-sized business you need every competitive advantage you can get like an ai solution that works for you not against you sap grow is built with ai embedded at its core working across every system and it's ready to go from day one so you can hit the ground running bring it with sap grow ai cloud erp for any size business that's why we don't do

three episodes in a row can you imagine if you're 24 years old and you shit yourself while quoting Moneyball you gotta get on base that one like that one sounded like

oh my god do you remember that old look up like like guy pooping his sweatpants couch video you know what I'm talking about that was the same noise

that that made where it was just the the poop fills his sweatpants yes I love that video that's the best video and he's like Spanish look up like guy guy

try the first one yeah it's this one you gotta get on base you gotta get on base you gotta get on base oh god alright stop it stop it Chris Pratt you gotta get on base

Strider told me yesterday one of the craziest um what not not his real name yeah michael oh all right no i'm kidding i'm kidding i was pranking i was pranking strider and i were talking about like you know like if you could pick how the conversation started with like if you could pick how big your penis would be what would you pick whatever and we kind of broke that down and then he was like i went to high school with this guy who uh who his penis was so big that the basketball team would have him like

he would shower with the basketball team to like a helicopter his penis for guys who hadn't seen it wasn't on the basketball team they would have him come in and shower with the basketball team but he wasn't there he wasn't on the team when i played football i mean that's yeah more proud when i played basketball in spain we all would shower together and uh i was 14 15 early 15 anybody here like virtually none i was a very late bloomer so this would have been sophomore year of high school but i i had like no pretty much no pubic hair tiny wiener i would shower with my underwear on because i just was like i would rather than be like that guy's a scared of us seeing his wiener than seeing it and i remember the first time going in there and there was one

kid on the team who just had a hog like a huge cock and i i was like oh my god this is worse than i was already like so nervous about yeah i mean it's such an awkward time in your life and i'm in a new country and i don't speak their language and like they also have like a second language in valencia so like they can talk about me without me even being able to understand the spanish oh that's fucked they they weren't they ended up being all like my best friends but i just remember that first time this year i'm like oh my god yeah i can never let them see mine because usually you like you're afraid of it and then you do it and you're like oh we all have yeah we all have tiny beans we're all like pretty pubescent guys this was the age where everyone was pubescent i was

the i was the last guy and one of them had just a a military grade rocket on him when i was on the tennis team we had to shower with the basketball team yeah and there was one dude who was like huge d1 and when he would come into the shower he would just like pick someone to come out he'd go like you with the dowel shampoo out and that kid it was usually like a tennis kid would just have to take his shampoo and like leave like the shower soaking wet yeah yeah like still half his hair is like shampooed he just like walk out we also had to do it like during after pe class did you do that too no yeah i mean like you're sweaty and gross i know but in a big communal shower yeah i always thought like the basketball team thing was like all right i can get passes we're

like a sports team yeah and i didn't in america ever have to shower with guys but in that same year in spain i had to yeah do it with my whole pe class and i got it was horrible are they are the spaniards dreaded pe oh we never showered after p.e also p.e in spain is like they take it like like it's like who's the best athlete like i feel like in america we've dumbed it down to like everyone's just like having fun and like yeah it's just like play play some obscure game we're like um cup stacking yeah we would do like it would be like push-up competition day and like the a if you got the if you did the most push-ups you got an a kind of thing oh and i like you know what i mean like your grade was literally determined by like how physically fit you were don't they

but they don't like don't grades like not matter as much over there like they don't they're not all going to college as much as americans right uh that's probably true yeah but they i mean they're still like you have a great oh oh you mean like like like that wouldn't that wouldn't like like if you failed maybe i had like a weird percent maybe i didn't even really get it yeah because it like if you failed gym here like that might like you might not be able to get into like college yeah i mean it's their scores all out of 10 and i remember the first my first like semester or whatever the time units were literally my only eight i think or seven was pe like the worst grade i got there was pe because i i think also i mean the teachers definitely like pitied me everything

was in spanish and i didn't speak spanish so it was definitely a lot of pity grades but pe was just like nah this guy's out of shape our gym class was a lot of like tests yeah yeah there'd be like written tests about like how to play soccer or something yeah this shit was yeah we'd go we'd like go play golf like on the track we'd like hit like fake golf balls and then you'd have to like come in and do like a written test on like the rules of golf it was so unfair because there were like some of us that yeah i'd known the rules of golf since we were like five and there were like girls who that's never going to be applicable to their lives and they've never played golf before and uh would get like a 50 because they're like hard some of these games

are like really hard rules yeah i mean there's definitely like if it was like a cricket test i'd get a zero so like that gives me sympathy for anyone that would have yeah i also remember i was in a theater there i was in this play i played a donkey and a burro a burro if you will um and one time my theater this is just a random story i just thought of but like my theater our theater we went on like a field trip with like the theater class to like see something i forget and then he was like take took us to mcdonald's after and then a bunch of the kids were like yo come over here come over here and i didn't know what the fuck was going on so i just followed this like group of like the cool kids like i want to be a cool kid and they just go out in the

mcdonald's parking lot and like hide behind a car and start like smoking weed i was like oh my fucking god i'm gonna get because like if i get caught smoking weed i literally get sent back home to america like you'd get deported like that literally yeah like it would be game over and i'm like oh my fucking god oh my fucking god i was like cool guys i'm gonna go to the bathroom or something i'll just like go back into the rest of the crew and hang out with them thinking like i got away with it and then i find out the theater teacher was like related to my host family and my host mom was like hey will like that day she's like we want to say we're like really proud of you i was like what he's like yeah rafa saw you walk over to or with a bunch of kids who

started smoking weed and then you got scared and went back to the crew i was like he saw all of that so like the teacher saw it happen and i guess he didn't say anything in the moment so like i think he was just like i'm not gonna deal with this this is like yeah above my pay grade but then he revealed behind closed doors that he totally knew it was happening is that legal over there to smoke weed no to the teachers certainly not during school yeah i don't i never understood the urge to be high at school no it sounds like a nightmare i'd buddies that would be high every day at school and we're like good students and it was like you could like like really excel if you just didn't do that totally the foreign exchange students were always like the craziest i remember

one time two of them they were like brothers showed up hammered to our football game and like they were the only two people that had like really like drank that much before the game yeah and they were so rowdy that they got like kicked out and everyone like booed the security guard and then like in like the third quarter they came back like they like were like revived and everyone was like yeah it's like this huge uproar no one was paying attention to the game at all we had uh some kids like years before i was even in high school i'd built this pretty elaborate like fort in the woods the kids would use to like pre-game and then go to the game oh that's sick and uh and i don't think i started like really drinking before games until i was like a junior sophomore

junior and uh and got away with it every time would like talk to the vice principal and he would be like like just because he was like our buddy's dad yeah so he like didn't want to get anyone in trouble but he's like you can't be like if you're talking to me and it's clear that you're drunk like whatever like i'm gonna have to say something got away with it until first away football game senior year i got suspended for two days for uh for i got caught drinking at that game a bunch of us did and the cop lined everyone up and was like uh all right everyone on that wall like oh my god we're so fucked is he gonna like breathalyze us or something and he was like all right blow on my fingers we were like what he's like blow on my fingers i'll smell i can smell

if he was drinking we're like okay and he did it he got like it was like 50 accurate like he like it was like clear he couldn't do it so he got me and one of our other buddies and then every other kid that was drinking just like got away with it because it's one by the time even if that did work yeah it's contaminated the second the first kid does it yeah you're right so the first kid got caught i got caught and then everyone else got off scot-free because i think after me he realized like oh it just smells the same it just smells like it's all yeah i remember the viral prank we did what me and caroline at wisconsin that yeah caroline kennedy yeah what is like sucking on each other's fingers what was it yeah yeah she would be she would be like blowing my fingers

and then stick it over and i go yeah he's drunk or was the op maybe the opposite i forget oh some of this the prank stuff was funny but it's it is so excruciating to film they will yeah them sending us them sending us to colleges is like uh torture not this time though my group your tour is gonna be awesome well because they fixed it it's we just have to like go to tailgate before it was like we'd have to do you'd have to do like 11 shots because every kid wants to do a shot of whatever the alcohol was and then they would make i got out of doing any like man on the street stuff every time but watching willie after that made me made my skin crawl yeah and you are effing me in a couple weeks because you're like wedding thing now we have to

go to i have to go to fort worth we we have to go to fort worth my hometown that's why i'm saying he's effing me because i have to spend a week there wait why do you have to go oh because you I have to go early for him, and then I have to stay throughout the weekend. So I'm going to be there Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday. What happens? Wait, are you from Fort Worth? Not Dallas? Like, Dallas-Fort Worth is, like, the same area, essentially.

Which one are you from, though? More so, like, Fort Worth. I'm, like, between the two. Waxahachie? Waxahachie? Yeah. Why do they group? Why does the airport?

Certain cities, like, group, so that's in between them, right? Yeah. I mean, it's, like, right by my house, yeah. Oh, nice. But I'm from Keller. I hate that area. Are you going to TCU? yeah we're going to tcu game tcu smu the big the red river rivalry okay i thought red river's

dallas river or sorry austin versus oklahoma the blue river rivalry anyway the yeah i gotta spend a week in fort worth so what are we doing it's gonna be hot as fucking balls yeah yeah wait when are you going uh september 17th through 21st okay so we go we got to do our play date we do our thing on wednesday and then you fly out and then i'm just there but what happens the other days well we'll have something like friday evening and saturday morning i think so like the sketch thing and then yeah then like a tailgate but like thursday and friday all day i'm just gonna be there so i don't know what i'm gonna do yeah maybe i'll maybe i'll find like a uh uh andy dalton museum that one that one is on me but in my defense i told them almost a year in advance

that i had this wedding and they were like we should plan we should plan the first thing that he has to do on the wedding day yeah that is yeah the first time i ever tried to use a fake id was in fort worth stockyards yeah the stockyards tell me about stockyards yeah my friend and i we went to the rodeo and um i like it worked there actually they didn't even id me at the rodeo what's the first thing you bought with your fake idea or was it a bar i think it was like um i think it was like a bud light lime yeah which was like because that's what my parents from a gas station or from a no at the rodeo because that's what my parents drank like growing up and now i realize that's like a really shitty i don't know man i like bud light lime really

i haven't had one when i was in college i haven't had one in forever either but when i was in college i was a big uh prickly pear cactus lime uh mickelob ultra guy i feel like i have had that before yeah yeah i feel like you were just like ai generating no no that was my that was my jam yeah i do remember that the green mickelob yeah the first thing i ever bought with my spaghetti because we were worried to buy alcohol with it at first because we didn't know like how good it was so we went we're like all right what's let's buy like tobacco products just to make sure this works because you can't get like a ton of trouble for trying to buy that so we went to a cigar shop and i got like a case of cigars i don't like cigars but it was and uh and it worked and

then we were off to the races got up got up why would you buy like cigarettes or something less expensive i don't know we was like we panicked it was like okay like tobacco because even like gas station to me was like yeah more risky and then first thing i ever bought was a pack 18 pack of rolling rocks oh nice we were just talking about we were just talking about rolling rocks yeah underrated were you guys at the brig i have a bunch of uh i have a bunch of videos of like every you know like like getting beer for the first like year and a half felt like like a bank heist yeah it was like i can't we would film it like every time and the first the first video of me walking out with the pack of rolling rock whoever my buddy duncan geike was filming it

and he's losing his fucking mind behind the camera it's like you're a legend you're a legend i think we had like two each i remember when i finally turned 21 nobody id'd me like on my 21st birthday like every restaurant i went to i was like can i get this drink they're like yeah cool and i'm like don't you want to check my id and they're like no i'm good and i'm like no you should you should check it tell me happy birthday maybe my 21st birthday i went to new york city to like see my brother and we're gonna go all out uh and i know i've told a bunch of stories about that weekend with but when i i don't even remember well like the mets yankees game all right the margaritas yep the subway series i tell you this no i'll give you the great spark notes version is

we go to the mets yankees game sneak into really good seats uh it's for my 21st birthday and we got big margaritas and we snuck down to these big seats in the good season the outfield my 21st birthday is the 20th anniversary of 9-11 so they that's why the mets and yankees were playing which you didn't even realize and then they did a thing like the fifth thing they're like we now honor the families of those who lost their lives at 9-11 who are here with us today we had snuck into the section where everyone's parents had died at 9-11 so everyone stands up and we're just standing there with these huge margaritas and we're like what do we do we're like just stand up just stand up just stand up because it was like it's worse to stand out yeah like everyone

in the section will literally kill us if so yeah so we just brutal stolen valor yeah and then that night we go to a nightclub in the city or like a rooftop club thing that my buddy was like the manager at and like hooked us up with the table it's like outdoor on a rooftop in like financial district and uh they project like the world trade centers into the sky so it's just like right like they do like huge holograms yeah just like right behind us is like the twin towers oh man bizarre anyway the beginning of that day though i go from boston to new york first bar we go to i realize i don't or i think i guess when i get to new york like the night before i realized i forgot my id i'm going over my 21st birthday and i forgot my id so i had to get my roommate to overnight it

so then me and my brother had to go to bars and i had to use a fake id like twice that day until the package arrived and then i got to go no i swear i'm 21 yeah but it was like i'm using a fake id when i'm 20 as a 21 year old exactly yeah yeah when mine got stolen the lady just like laughed at my face like i handed it over and she was like no there's like absolutely no way this is like real we had just gone to the rodeo at the stockyards and then we were going to a bar next door i didn't order a fake id my buddy just had like a binder full of fake ids that he was like bringing to his buddies at college and he was like you kind of look like my one friend so just use this one so the lady took it and i remember that it was from south

carolina and i couldn't remember if it was columbia or charleston because i remembered it started with the sea and so she was asking my address and i said columbia and it was charleston and she was like yep not not gonna happen and she was like she was like i'm gonna bring this cop over right now if you don't leave and so i was like okay so i left but my buddy stayed and he was like can i at least have the id back because it's my buddies i gotta bring back to college like next week like it's not even for him and she was like absolutely not you're an idiot get the fuck out of dude the gas stage we would buy from this place called the rusty lantern and it was it shared you just call that the lantern yeah for me that's just the lantern

it shared a parking lot with the south portland police department so it was like it was the only place that believed our ids were real but it it was like the closest proximity to danger maybe that's why yeah they were like no one would be dumb enough to do this the amount of times that you would be like sitting there with a 30 rack and then like cops would come in to get like a slice and you're like oh no be cool be cool yeah i was the same in college it was like a walsh lickers we'd go to and it was next door to the yeah and police department and we'd be like i guess that's honestly i feel like it's like if a cop saw you like there's no way he would dude the when i was a kid uh there was a or i guess it's still there but there was this

restaurant called the bag which was at in carabasso valley was on sugarloaf mountain which is where we all skied and my dad had this big uh f-250 with like a long bed because he used to like deliver shit in it and uh it had a covered top and like we wanted to go like 15 of us to the bag and uh the bear couldn't couldn't fit everyone in the in the seats who were like all right just get in get in the bed it's like a five minute drive we'll be there in two seconds and they brought like a speaker they're having like a grand old time in the back there's like 10 kids in the in the back of this bed and we pull into the bag parking lot also shares a parking lot with the police station and there's like three spots it's like unbelievably tight to like get in and out

and so it takes me like five minutes to get in we go in have dinner or whatever come back out load everyone back into the bed and i realized like oh my god with the way this new car parked while we were in there like i'm knocking it's a boat of a car like it's ginormous we're not gonna be able to get this thing out and so we're like kind of like inching like 20 point turning our way out cop comes out flashlight taps on my window and i'm like oh my god i'm so fucked they're playing music on their speaker like in the back you can hear them like giggling and stuff they have no idea what's happening because they're under like a cover wait wait i'm confused about what kind of car is this f-250 is like a ford truck but they're covered that you can put a bed

cover over it so like they're like sealed in the bed under like a black like tarp whatever but are they like laying down yeah they're like all like laying down on the thing like cracking up and like they have no idea like i'm a cop has come up and uh he taps on the window and i'm like oh my god we're so fucked because i can hear their music the cop can definitely hear the music i was just like all right fuck it and like rolled down the window i was like hi officer he was like how you doing tonight been better like how are you doing and he was like yeah it looks like you need some help getting out he was like i'll direct you so he just like kind of like air traffic controlled me out and then he goes you can drive right through the village which is like you're not

normally supposed to drive through there but it was late at night we were like oh my god how the fuck did we get away with that and he like waved on the way out that's awesome wow that's really nice and then he he waved and then he pulled out his gun and started shooting shot out all four tires in your dreams pal you thought i was gonna fucking let you get away with that oh that's funny i've noticed now gas stations will just ask me how old i am instead of checking my id and i forget probably half the time i go 24 i mean 23 i mean 25 i think wait how old are you i'm 25 okay yeah when's your birthday october 18th oh 1999 coming up libra not to brag not to brag but my uh my friend emily we all had connecticut fake ids yeah like i think connecticut and south

carolina were like the two best ones you guys use id god is that where you guys uh no you'd like you thought it was like old ironside ah i know all that you'd like western union like three hundred to like china and then just like 10 weeks later a like package of like forks would come and you'd like oh i got ripped off and then the ids would be like inside so it could get through custom and uh she had a connecticut one and i think she put like darian or new canaan or something as her hometown and the lady was like darian that's coastal right and like i've been there like i honestly don't even really like i guess you could you could make an argument either way and uh and she had never like googled it so she didn't know she was like uh uh kind of i guess or whatever

and the lady was just like oh i got you now and she was the only kid i ever knew that like got in trouble with their fake idea at this gas station because she didn't know she couldn't she couldn't tell you if it was on the code you gotta just you gotta pick one like there's no way this gas station attendant actually knows she was just gauging your i put my actual home address on it's in south carolina it's such like a common like yeah it's like a fake that i just did my literal exact home address but then if you get caught with it they can go back to your house like my friend cam yeah but i was like if i get caught with a fake id who the bouncer is gonna go to my house no like if the cops get it oh so like my friend my friend cam had a texas one but he put his

main address i think okay and so they were like oh trundy road that's like right down the street and they like went and got him oh yeah that reminds me of uh that episode of community where annie gets a fake id she's like i'm from south carolina should i have a southern accent at the bar and they're like no it doesn't matter they don't care and she's like no no so the whole night she does like a southern accent and they're like uh the other girl britta is like it doesn't matter like they're gonna let like hot girls in no matter what and she's like okay i'm just so nervous and they go to the bar and the bouncer doesn't even check annie's id and then britta goes up and he like scans it like 10 times and like bends it and he's like can never be too

careful and like hands it back to her and you can just see britta's face like she's like fuck that'd be funny like she drops the accent and they immediately are like wait a minute the guys at true classic started with a simple mission to bring premium comfortable clothing to the masses because looking and feeling great shouldn't come with a designer price tag honestly i think it's pretty clear that people agree i agree true classic has 25 million shirts that they've sold not they don't have 25 million different shirts but they've sold over 25 million shirts uh 5 million customers they've got over 200 000 five-star reviews and it's not just about like the fabric or the fit which are obviously fantastic but it helps guys show up with confidence

and purpose okay they fit the right way they make you feel like you can be comfortable and you can be classy and you can show up like you ever go to the dmv and you're like what do i wear to the dmv true classic true class all right here's the question guess what what do i wear on a hot first date true class what do i wear to my own wedding true classic what do i wear on top of a grape true classic exactly willie and i've been wearing them for a while now and let me tell you we felt the difference the moment we threw them on yeah uh it's tailored where you want it there's no bunching no stiff fabric none of that bs just a clean effortless fit um that actually works for real life it's built for comfort it's built to last and they do a bunch of great stuff for the

community and they are built to give back so you can find them on amazon target costco sam's club or head to trueclassic.com slash playdate to try them out for yourself true classic it's the truth i just came up with that that's not a you can have you guys can have that's not an approved saying from the brand i just came up with it taking a minute to talk about one of today's sponsors tick pick tick pick is the leader in transparent pricing and always shows you your prices up front tick pick has the best prices on tickets to any live event sports concerts you name it tick pick hooked me and lauren up with tickets to the gracie abrams concert a couple weeks ago and let me tell you it was awesome we were able to get awesome seats right on the floor

we lauren touched gracie's hand that's okay that should be that should be the selling point tick pick literally let lauren or i guess gracie let her too yeah but put her in a position to touch her idol and i was super close too uh which is also really cool right yep tick pick hooked me up and my took me and my sisters up with uh dodgers tickets nice some great family bonding at Dodger Stadium, it was a blast. We got literally the best seats you could possibly get at Dodger Stadium that aren't, you know, the umpire. That's what I like to say.

TickPick can get you just as close as the umpire. TickPick got me so close I was calling balls and strikes. Yeah. TickPick, I caught it. I had a home run. TickPick literally put me in a position to hit a triple. I hit a triple at the Dodgers game. Here's what we appreciated most about TickPick.

some of these other apps it'll say one price and then it's by the time you check out it's a whole new price i couldn't believe this transparent it is exactly what the price is the app is easy to use download tick pick today and get ten dollars off your first purchase by clicking the link in our bio and making an account experience the leader in transparent ticket pricing click the link in our bio to download tick pick today and get ten dollars off your first purchase let's get back into the episode i'm feeling pain y'all getting y'all getting brain i'm i'm feeling pain i feel a lot better yeah oh i'm spitting on his chat oh nope absolutely not absolutely not apologize andrew for that apologize andrew for that well i'm sorry andrew that i was doing that

you're producing the podcast and you're wearing our hat we're sitting on the desk talking the mics roadmap roadmap we got a beautiful episode for you guys today we're gonna hear your pitches followed by our pitches then we're gonna do everyone's favorite am i the asshole followed by teach me something and right before that we're actually gonna do this guy rocks and then we will and i are going to do ways to say someone someone died i think ways to say someone died and fun facts you can use during an icebreaker guys it you know college is is right around the corner new jobs are starting and people are going to be wanting to uh have you do an

icebreaker and icebreakers are always fucking boring so we're going to give you good ones i have a question yeah for this one so yours are also just made up yeah you're gonna be lying unless it happens to apply to your life but every these are just good fun ones that you can use uh to maybe break the ice a little bit and not that's a good not be so boring have y'all seen uh damn y'all seen severance y'all seen seven worst guy ever helly r got guy you guy you didn't invite to your house y'all seen severance what was that guy you were talking about that used to hang out in the corner of your parties colin colin sitting in the corner waiting for a girl to get drunk enough to drive her home he goes y'all seen severance leave colin dude i got no one fucking

invited you colin chicken schnitzel sandwich what what about it i got a chicken schnitzel sandwich for dinner yes i know from augie's no they had a pop-up at dudley market walked over sat right down which is like never happens there yeah i've still never eaten there because i you know how much i hate lines yeah and waiting you call me i'll put your name in then you don't have to wait i know there's something also walking if you're going to vbb and you get dropped off by like a waymo or an uber outside of dudley market walking through there is the most embarrassing thing in the world for some reason imagine being a sweaty shirtless guy with like not a body of a sweaty shirtless guy right that's how i feel after all my long runs when you walk through it's like

all the hottest dude it's the coolest it's the coolest guys in town and when you and your me and my fucking motley crew were there are some hot guys in my crew but i'm definitely the least hot guy walking through dudley market and it's like trendy people waiting and they're drinking fucking orange orange so foot contact wine and they're about to have a great meal and i'm walking to binge drink at venice beach bar and they all they all i can hear him fucking whispering they go there he goes that guy's a fucking loser he could never hang with our crew the last time i had i it was when i peed myself so i had to like take like tuck my shirt in around my waist so that people can see that i had a big piss stain they're like hey that's will denell and he just

pissed himself yeah that that uh that is the closest feeling in adulthood to being like a walking through dudley market it's like to get to venice yeah is is you're at a new school yeah you know no one and it's the and all the cool kids are like who have just started having sex and they do like they like smoke weed before school and stuff while having sex while having yeah they're like they're like smoking bowls out of each other's belly buttons while they like are in some japanese sex position you've never heard of walking through the cafeteria on the first day of school trying to find your table and not pick the wrong one for the rest of the year yeah oh what you guys like so stressful you were there i mean it was just kind of like you didn't

have to like pick it but it was like once you had committed to one table it was kind of oh then if you like you want to hang with a different crew the next day your your boys from day one are like what yeah what the fuck i got like so overwhelmed by the cafeteria and the dynamics and everything that i just never went all of high school i just had this teacher i liked and i would just go eat in her room i would either go home or miss shout out miss novenger yeah she was chills one of my one of my best friends to this day uh i met him first day we everyone in my high school usually we went to like kindergarten together and then there were a handful of kids that would like transfer in my friend brendan who i didn't know at the time uh i think he thought our school was

like a lot preppier than it was like there was like the kids from other towns i think thought thought we were very very preppy and so he showed up everyone's wearing completely normal clothes but he was wearing like a vineyard vines button down tucked into nantucket reds and he had like loafers on sweet kind of a fit it was a he was throwing a fucking fit and he came up and he was like hello gentlemen um would you guys mind if i sat with you and we were like that why are you being weird and then now he's one of my good buddies he's still very he's still a very odd guy but it's awesome nice guy what through one of my friends first day of senior year he was like hey man um we have the same english class like will you save me a seat i was like for sure man

totally forgot oh didn't save him a seat oh there was one seat left at another table and he sat down there and he was like fuck dude i gotta sit here for the rest of the year ends up talking to this girl next to him they've been dating for seven years now you did that so i did that i did that by forgetting so shout out shout out to vj and hannah you're gonna be as bad i hope so yeah i should be vj yeah yeah before we knew his name this one kid on um he was on the tennis team with me and uh before we like could remember his name this one kid just called him the vagina kid nice he's like who's a who's a vagina kid i'll go vj okay that explains why you looked over me and went let me tell you andrew if you didn't if you saved him that seat he would be getting no vj

dude i love i love the memories we make together now they're gonna last a lifetime too you know they're gonna be on the internet for do you ever think oh is this what you were about to say no but that our kids are gonna be able to know exactly what we were like our kids are gonna be able to watch this son daughter if you're watching this i'm sorry i'm not sorry i think that i think that it's very the only bad part about it is we're gonna have very little like negotiating power when it comes to like don't do stuff or like be a good kid yeah yeah because we've said everything yeah my dad got uh my dad streaked through the cafeteria when he was in high school like hanging brain hanging brain like full like a felony yeah well he was like a minor but

he yeah he flashed otherwise he still vehemently denies that he did this like he's like that wasn't me it was because he was wearing either like pantyhose or like a ski mask over his face but everyone knew it was him he's still like there's like a little twinkle in his eye that like you can tell like he's a little bit proud of it but he like will not why did he do it i don't know he was like just like a he's just like a madman but uh my sister met either i don't remember who she met she met someone uh and their parent was there and went to high school with my dad i was like oh your dad streaked through the cafeteria and she was like no that wasn't him she was like it was him it was him we know it was him the cool kids in my fraternity when i was or

the fraternity i was gonna rush before because we couldn't rush until second semester but like you already kind of knew like what crew you were running with the older guys were obsessed with fire like all like pyromaniacs they would build they would like set certain things on fire and and jump it with their uh with their moped and so it would be like pallets of whatever like one time they like took their own couch outside and like set it on fire like truly like looking back into like pyromaniacs and uh and i was like these are the cool these are the guys i want to run with i need to i need to be i need to be in this crew yeah pyro they used to call me pyro willie because no they didn't

yeah there was a rush event where they just like smashed the car there's just a car and you can just like get a hammer so like someone else's car uh yeah it was like a junk car okay all right junk car all right pitch me hello bev biv and devoe bev devoe what is that i'll be and um i don't know should i look it up no it's gonna be something bad long time listener first time pitcher what's the worst part about picking out a new board game oh my god the rules you takes a few games to get it no one there's like one guy that's really excited about how complicated the rules are and the rest of us don't want to do it uh close uh deciding which one to choose and spending a decent chunk of change every time you want to play the game

way too many options in the game aisle and once you buy a game it's yours forever you might not even enjoy the game um that much or play it once those murder mystery games so fun yet once you solve the murder that game is done and never to be played for again oh i know where this is going introducing game buster it's blockbuster but for board games you can either sign up for a membership for a fee or you can just rent a game at a time want to try wingspan out but not sure if you like birds that much rent it out for a weekend and see if you should join the flock want to solve a few murder mysteries over the weekend okay sherlock go for it need a drinking game for a darty now you can with game buster pricing tiers are in the works and if there's damage there's an additional

fee of course but that's for the higher ups to deal with so sharks who's in right with love from the bay area darcy dude that is that is awesome that is fucking fantastic i i think maybe it would be more like old school netflix they sent to your house they sent it to your house because i think the brick and mortar thing kind of yeah it doesn't work anymore but the dude the thought of going in renting a nice little board game bringing it home with your lady and just playing that sounds like this can you google board game rental like this almost feels like it should exist yeah it almost feels like you shouldn't have told us that and just done it they have it at the library yeah but that's like it's all like bullshit ones it's like chutes and ladders and shit yeah you should

do that darcy you should do that and i i actually would invest yeah i love that idea actually that would be really fun because sometimes you get a game and you're like ah yeah i don't know swinging a mess you guys ever played jackbox in college i loved jackbox like wait like quiplash yeah yeah my cousin chris was over one time and i hadn't heard of jackbox before and so he put it we were playing quiplash and we were like oh my god this is an awesome game we all kind of were like it was before you realized like oh just it's whatever the dirtiest answer is is funny yeah we were playing it the way i think they had intended it so it was like we were just trying to be silly or whatever but chris already knew like that just the most shocking answer is probably gonna win yeah and

so the first round every single one his were like the dirtiest thing you'd ever keep in mind all cousins were all related and we were trying to be like kind of tame and silly and chris wiped it it was like it was like when the first guy dunked in basketball and you're like i didn't even know you could do that i'll never revolution i'll never forget when i that first summer we were out in la will angus we played one time at the old office and he deployed a strategy that i it was a game breaking at the time i think people have caught up but he just right before we started playing just goes and i was i had just moved out and i was new and they all had been there for like a little bit so i was kind of assuming i was like late to the party on like they played before

or something and he goes guys and please seriously this time nothing about bees seriously like no bee jokes like it's just old let's just nothing about bees and then of course all his answers are about bees so every time it comes up he goes oh come on and it would be like yeah it would be like you know to be like something or like god something about like honey or like buzz and uh he's he just he ran the whole game it became and then the second round then everyone's trying to do b jokes but it's all it's stale at that point yeah exactly it was it was a master he's the funny he's truly he's true he's probably the funniest person i've ever met in my life second for andrews about it uh we played quiplash one time and it was like my friend group but we

were all in the same like college organization yeah and uh for the final question i put like who's most likely to cry during sex and it was just like 20 garrisons all there don't cry and it just like nuked our friend group like we didn't hang out ever again after that like it like so many people were divided they were like that's fucked up he's not even here to defend himself he wasn't even there no he wasn't there he was just like a guy on our org he wasn't really like our friend but there were some people that were the best the best feeling in the world was coming home from the bars with like a couple of your buddies and like their girlfriends who like not that not that i they didn't have funny girlfriends but i just remember

one night we're like they they weren't the funniest women in the world so i'd throw like a medium one or whatever and it was like i felt like the man every everything was like they'd never heard anything funny before yeah you feel like the funniest man i remember playing when i lived in greenville and all my friends there were like very very nice people like loved everyone but everyone was like very like christian yeah conservative and i was like i had to like toe a line for sure but i think i think i've i think i've it was like a weird like you there's always like a pulse check the first time you play with a new crew and then i also remember going to a party in i think it was when i lived in washington dc or something and my cousin like

someone had invited me to this thing anyway and i get there and i'm like all right i'm gonna play cool uh feel out the crew and right off the bat like the most vile shit i've ever seen out of like respectable people that i was like oh my god like it was like worse i was like oh oh i can't even hang like i can't do that i can't type these things damn so i feel like there's always like the first round of the new quick flash cruise yeah i was talking to a girl one time and she invited me to play clip flash with her friend group and it was the imposter one and it was like where like everyone knows the prompt except for you and you're supposed to hold up like a number on your hands and you're just supposed to go with everybody else and it was penis length and i was the

imposter so i didn't know so like it went and i just put up one and everyone was like uh and i was like i'm the imposter i'm the imposter i'm the imposter like pull me out like i can't have this girl i'm talking to you think i have a one-inch dick i was like wait that's hysterical vote me out vote me out vote me out um all right willie and andrew what's the worst part about owning clothes it hurts things you're learning you're learning what he likes you're getting a feel for what it really likes um you you slowly over time lose a bunch of your like favorite clothes you're like where the fuck did that go there should i want i'm inventing a hanger hangers with like weight sensors that are like corresponding to each thing so when you pull one

out it automatically checks it out on a list so it's like this one is out and it will notify you like if it doesn't make it back into the hamper if it never gets hung back up so you can notice that you've lost something before it's been like months and you're like oh i don't even remember i love that and it keeps inventory of like all your clothes so you're like see i'm convinced my cleaning people are stealing my favorite t-shirts and so i've but i have no proof but if at the if i saw the sensor go off in the middle of the day i would know either my roommate is trying on my clothes again or the cleaning people are taking that could there be a modification for uh the floor too oh because you just throw your shit on the floor yeah i just i don't know maybe

maybe the floor is like weighted i don't know yeah i don't always have shit hung up i'm not like fucking jesus christ you don't hang your clothes up i don't have enough room to hang i have a tiny closet it's like i mean i i fold most of them put them in the dresser okay your dresser could do that too okay and then some of them i pile in a big pile in my the floor of my closet big pile i pitch me i don't physically have enough space to contain and everything so i have to have a big pile of shit at all times my closet um bitchy bitch oh what's the worst part about skateboarding you don't know how to do it that is so rude but you're right side you can't go side to side what do you mean oh you want to be like skateboarding

four-way skateboard oh you're just you're bombing a hill like facing down the hill you can go any way you want oh i like started making that my fate my new fart noise like when i do a fake fart and now my farts somehow all sound like that yeah your cycle oh my skateboard you can you're skateboarding and then you go that way and then you go that way and then if you want to do a kickflip what'd you do you shouldn't no it just smelled so bad i'm shocked you can't smell this no i lost my did you you just fart yeah i lost my smell during covid oh i love it willie should we do am i the asshole yes who do you think's gonna shit themselves next me or you okay fair enough actually i did because i just shit myself like i shit myself before the gracie abrams concert

i think i don't know but statistically i would be next no you didn't tell us this actually yeah he did it was just like one quick like poot right before i was leaving and uh i just changed i changed it's the he called me it was the exact same thing that happened to me we were going to a dodgers game like years ago and right as the uber got there i shit myself yeah the uber was way it was like uber is here and i go all right and no fuck but i i was just thanking god that it didn't happen because at that point yeah i mean if i shit myself at the kia forum you just going to the bathroom throw your boxers out and clean your butt up wouldn't you you're not leaving i mean it wasn't all my boxers i guess yeah yeah he was like it was confined to his cheeks which is

it was confined to my cheeks a guy we know was home during covid and he was uh playing xbox with his feet up on the on the dresser and uh farted and shit himself and he was like i don't have a job i'm living at my parents house and i just shit myself that was angus right yeah i think but bleep that i think he talked about on the pod though i don't i don't want to be the one but yeah 26 years old don't have a job live with your parents you just shit yourself while playing call of duty that's awesome all right am i the asshole for telling my co-worker her breath stinks i'm a flight attendant and almost every time i start a trip i'm working with people i've never met before i'd known this person for about four hours but her breath was absolutely rancid

we're sitting on the jump seat together and in very close quarters i literally have to face the opposite way when she speaks due to the aroma on an airplane it's very difficult to escape these kinds of situations because you're kind of stuck where you are i tried pushing through it for the rest of the day and subtly offered her gum and did a million trash runs through the aisle just to get her away finally i ended up telling her that i really think she should take a piece of gum or mint because her breath is a little stinky she took the gum and seemed embarrassed understandable especially when an almost stranger tells you that but barely talked to me for the rest of the three-day trip oh oh my god i want i would want someone to tell me but am i the asshole

p.s we can tell when you're vaping in the lav rusty and that's from carmen no you can't wait how do they know when you're vaping in the loft he goes like oh they can't hear that oh oh in the in the like lavatory yeah i thought she was saying this they actually know how do they know have you seen the video the guy getting like i hit it one time damn that stinks but here's the thing that stinks but two things i think she probably knows i think people with like she probably has like halitosis or something and probably knows i sometimes i feel like my breath stinks and i would want someone to tell me so i could go fix it i guess yeah it's like i had a i had a one of my best friends at a roommate in college that had like stinky feet yeah and it was

always a tough thing because it was like it was a problem it was hard to deal with but it was he would also see that the guy had like stinky foot spray right stinky foot cream so it was like okay well clearly he's aware yeah oh where do you so now here's the question should she have if you're gonna be on a three-day trip with this person yeah you should be like dude like if this is something you're dealing with you should have a piece of gum in 24 7 three-day trip how does that work i guess you they go with the same crew they're just gonna go back and forth back and forth for on that whatever leg they're doing oh man yeah no you're not the asshole i don't think i think you did it the right way like it wasn't like the most embarrassing thing you could have

done is just the first time you noticed it been like oh my god your breath stinks you you tried to help her she wasn't doing it also flight attendants like are talking to a million people a day like you need she can't be yeah because it does affect yeah the maybe you put gum in your nose oh have you tried putting gum in your nose no i agree i think i think you probably did the right thing i think it sucks there's no world in which it's like fun but you did the right thing i used to talk with a girl who had just perpetually bad breath oh my god and it was like you always kind of had to like brace yourself before you kissed her and i brought it up to my roommate at the time and uh the day after a party that she had been at my roommate tiger was like yeah that

shit do stink he was like you got to cut that off and i was like yeah i think i do because it's a deal breaker like it really is one of my best buddies the first time we met it like hit me like a wall and i was like oh my god that's so odd he's such a like normal nice clean guy had never happened since i think i just caught him on a like caught him on a bad day or whatever but i think if mine like perpetually stinked i would want stunk i would want someone to tell me yeah does my breath ever stink willie mine no yeah does mine ever stink should we tell them you guys submitted this you're not the asshole i wonder how they can tell do you think like a light goes off and most flight attendants just don't care i don't know i don't think you

can tell i think i think i'm sneaky enough yeah but i i guess noted i will stop all right trudy this guy rocks yeah all right andrew pause this immediately and i mean immediately bang okay this is this is uh this is a girl or guy that is out with their dad it looks like either on a cruise ship or maybe like a vegas nightclub i can't really tell and the dad is feeling himself and the snapchat text on the screen says never bringing my dad out again this is definitely a cruise ship For 50 years, Canadians have wondered what the names of IKEA furniture mean. Like Natopa, the guardrail for children's beds. Natopa means giving your favourite person room to grow.

It means their safety and your piece of... No. In Swedish, Nattopa means night monkey. Mom! He's back! IKEA. 50 years of Swedishness at home. Look, he's wearing little pajamas. So cute. He's like, no, no, no, get off. Oh, my God.

That's got to be a cruise ship, right? Yeah. Dude, you're his wife. Just don't give him coke and y'all should be good. his wife his wife uh tries to stop him and he confidently chews her way yeah that's hysterical has anyone ever done that move yeah successfully oh that's the first time i've seen it not work oh wow high risk high reward yeah sorry all right let me see willie what do you got i got a really good one turn the volume up i'm gonna fucking kill you enough

jesus is in danger press all buttons to help jesus escape play it again please do not swipe away from this video jesus is in danger press all buttons to help jesus escape i thought that was not so are you saying jesus rocks or satan rock or who even is that that's not what that's the guy on the menace boardwalk that's the that's the last the last thing you see after a guy gives you a drink at the bar i want to go to heaven that's that's you that's you trying to stop me from so did you like comment share and save yeah so that's so the guy in the back is uh uh where do i know that guy my mom and the guy in the front is me trying to eat gushers

under our stairs until i get cavities in my teeth god what do you think the prompt was like what was the ai prompt that they put in i mean i think it's it's i think it has a mind of its own oh my god um dude if if we if i go to hell and that's what it looks like i'm gonna be so bummed well you're gonna go to hell if you don't reshare this so you're welcome that i share this with as many people as i did i fucking wait but this says nothing about how this is just we just for some reason if this gets enough likes comments shares and saves lucifer will let yeah can we watch it one more time actually from the start i actually really kind of like this jesus is in danger press all buttons to help jesus escape okay

that could be something one more time no not one more time now okay one more time that's it Please do not swipe away from this video. Jesus is in danger. Press all buttons to help Jesus escape. I hate it so much, dude. That guy rocks. Shout out Jesus. I really, really, truly, truly, truly despise it.

I hate it with every fiber of my being. But I'm glad that you... Teach me something. Teach me something, Willie. All right. Do you know about... Okay, I'm going to give you a choice for this one. Okay.

I got two things, and you guys get to pick. Land, one if by land, two if by sea. Sea, obviously. Sea. Okay, do you know about the vaquita? No. Yeah. What is it?

It's a tiny porpoise, and it's endangered. And there's like 20 left in the world. Look up vaquita with a V. You just got family, guys. No, I'm just kidding. Oh, that's adorable. I'm so mad. What the hell is it?

it's like five feet long so it's like it's like fun size yeah where does it live uh gulf of california off of mexico really yeah there's 20 of them i think the estimate is that there's like 20 left oh okay that looks like ai yeah no that one's really yeah really what are we doing to save them i don't know i'm not doing much i this is the first i've heard of them so i haven't done nothing yeah all right wait can i show you the land option please it's similar google saula s-a-o-l-a also a highly highly ola highly endangered land mammal in like vietnam whoa i call it the asian unicorn there's like a hundred left nice what are we doing to save them i think we're teaming them

up with the vaquita i love it i love it a lot i thought you would like all these endangered animals i do did you google like animals that are in danger no that's not real that was a unicorn how do you know all right do you guys know about the greenland shark yeah okay no i don't okay the greenland shark is fascinating it is oh is this one that's like a million years old it like it there are ones that were alive during like the civil war like they're like hundreds and hundreds of years old they lived like 400 they move they're like not like like i don't think it would be a problem if you were in the water with one they move like one mile an hour and just wait for like they're in almost like complete darkness they're like

super low down off of greenland and like in the arctic and uh they'll just like wait for like a dead fish to like float past them and if they miss it they might not eat for another like handful of months isn't that insane they're just like these like kind of bottom feeder esque damn sharks they live to like 400 they are born in complete darkness with like you know eight of their siblings and then they might never see another greenland shark their mom immediately ditches them but like not on purpose they all just kind of like float like what i gathered is they're all just kind of like floating around don't they have to find another one to bang yeah i guess like they'll like run into one and and mate once in their like 500 years that they're

alive and google this guy yeah and they uh they can go months on end without eating are they covered in like barnacles no but they're covered in like scars they're like really like sad looking like they look old it looks like what a shark would look like in like the 1400s isn't that fucking crazy yeah so like they've they literally have to wait for something like something a fish that's so rotten that like other shit wouldn't have gotten it wow and uh it'll just like float into their mouth they're like the sloths of the sea uh all right that's awesome willie do you want to do fun facts you can use during an icebreaker or ways to say someone died you pick let's do fun facts you can use during an icebreaker okay

these are fun facts you can use in an icebreaker i've slept with someone in this room and then everyone has to look around and try and figure out who is like on your level and would let you have sex with them i like that every time i see an animal in captivity i try to free it and i have a 50 success rate yeah that makes him wonder like has he done it a hundred times and he's freed 50 animals or has he tried twice and only it's like i've been to a zoo once because that's like an insane success rate in the context of a zoo uh my grandfather invented the wedgie and then they have to try and figure out was your grandfather a bully or was he a poor kid who was on the on the uh receiving end of like a new tactic i like that i spent six years training for the olympics just

to find out that jumping rope is not an event i love it uh i'm the second dumbest person in this room and then everyone around you is starting to think am i dumber than that guy i like that like that my name spelled backwards is a flavor of jelly people will be racking their brains they're like what's marmalade backwards marmalade's not a flavor eparg eparg would be great backwards i think sorry but did i make it my name my name backwards is a flavor of jelly eparg nice to meet you these are ways to say someone died he's sucking soil they moved south his heart has taking pto he has a meeting with the man he got called into the other room he beat the game that's awesome and then i had he is the wind i want some when i die every time there's a gust

of wind they're like that's jack will i want people to say well and i didn't what was the thing you said that one time we were drunk oh yeah i said when will dies i'm at his funeral i'm gonna say most people run away from life will denon runs at it oh you're like blacked out at a bar and i kept being like i'm gonna say that at your funeral he's like all right dude and then i'm gonna write a memoir too cool to crash the wild and ellen does that already exist yeah me and scott it's a joke we've had for like a long time there's gonna be a book about me called too cool to crash the wild and ellen story but hopefully not hopefully but like it kind of implies that i died in a car crash right yeah but like that

would sell more copies yeah yeah all right time for rusty's song of the day uh i got keys in the conch shell by kenny chesney i it's about this guy he lives i think it's like he's in the keys or he's in florida or something and this woman calls him maybe an old lover she's like hey what's up hello she says something like that and uh he's like that's so funny that like right when you were calling i was just i was just hoping i'd see you again he's like come on over uh and then he talks about how he's probably he's probably out fishing or like windboarding or something but if if he's not there when she gets back the keys in the conch shell come on in make make yourself at home and i always my favorite friends are the ones that feel comfortable just coming over and like

letting themselves in and so i really liked the visual of that i like that a lot yeah all right we love you guys have a great rest of your Monday have a great Tuesday and we will see you bright and early for our Wednesday episode love ya happy Wednesday