Will & Rusty's Playdate - we interviewed the first ever talking dog

Episode Date: February 26, 2025

This week, Will and Rusty discuss salami-maxing, why Impossible Burgers are so difficult, and how to revolutionize fajitas with a silencer. They also investigate the true purpose of saloon doors, Lauren breaks down her perfect Sunday, and Rusty debates trading his Jeep for a Smart car. Plus, the boys draft dance moves that don’t exist and come up with new names for jobs. FOLLOW OUR SOCIALS: https://www.flowcode.com/page/playdatepod BUY OUR BUILDING DEPARTMENT SHIRT: https://almostfriday.shop/collections/playdate-pod/products/building-dept-longsleeve HEAD TO http://www.drinktriple.com/playdate TO GET 10% OFF THE ORIGINAL HIGH SELTZER USING CODE: PLAYDATE. 0% HANGOVER, 100% SOCIAL.  PICK UP SOUTHERN COMFORT WHISKEY FOR YOUR NEXT PREGAME OR WATCH PARTY. SOCO IS EASY GOING AND DOWNRIGHT DELICIOUS. https://www.southerncomfort.com/  ACCELERATOR AVAILABLE ON AMAZON. UPGRADE YOUR ENERGY HERE https://www.amazon.com/stores/page/FB06B38E-F0C2-479F-9DA5-FD4A1C852B07?channel=Playdate 00:00 Intro 00:25 Birdie 08:05 Weekend Recap 13:25 Mimosa Time! 17:37 Rusty Gets Caught 23:33 Smart cars 32:01 Finspan 38:11 Wearing Band Tees 41:56 Roadmap 44:43 Pitch Submissions 59:51 Pitches 01:24:28 This Guy Rocks 01:08:34 Teach Me Something 01:13:08 Dance Moves that Don’t Exist 01:16:47 New Names for Jobs 01:18:25 Whose Personality are you Stealing? #AlmostFriday #FridayBeers #PlaydatePod Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

as always playdate is brought to you by triple the original high seltzer redefining the party landscape podcast episode 83 vincent jackson there we go i mean i i yeah we were locked and loaded we're locked and loaded for this episode and next week because we kept getting yeah we painting the corners yes oh we have a new guest oh yes birdie birdie say hi birdie um i'm gonna just say it yeah she sucks at podcasting she's not very good she's not good i've spent for our audio listeners she's a dog she's a dog uh she's good at a lot of things podcasting is not one of them i had a huge snafu when i went to go get her well tell us about where she came from so she birdie is a dog she came from what i think is like she's like a chihuahua

like retriever hybrid retriever i think so she's very docile and she's she whatever whatever dna yeah the chihuahua has that makes him like skittish and that she somehow did not get those genes well you've been giving her triples too i haven't she's tripled out of her gourd right now um that would be so fucked up getting getting a dog eye but so she's my sister's dog uh my sister is in chicago right now and so i went to go pick her up my sister lives in echo park which if you're familiar that's like where cool people live right he's very which we're very cool people live and for the sake of this story i need people to know that it is not south of here that is very important okay that is a very important thing to know if you are driving to echo park you should know that

it's not south of you go south i will tell you so i so i originally was going to drive to my sister's location on find my friends because i didn't have her address yeah then she texts me uh an address and she said like hey actually come to this this address because it'll take you to the back part where you can park you don't have to park on the busy street so i click on it uh i was dropping some people off at dinner in venice yeah venice is further away from echo park than where i am and my first clue that i was driving in the wrong direction should have been that i was like about 20 minutes closer wait you were starting where in venice got it got it which is not closer to echo yeah and i go oh they must have some like secret route

they're gonna like slingshot me around all this traffic gonna have the dog in no time we're driving and i get on the 405 towards long beach and it does not have me getting off for about 30 miles 20 miles however long it was and i got like this is odd but like it has me making great time i'm gonna get there in like 40 minutes this will be perfect and uh i get off the highway and it is not it's not a part of los angeles that i recognize i still don't know you went all 30 miles with just feeling well well gonna slingshot me eventually that's great and uh i kept being like out loud being like this is so much further south than i thought it was and then i get off the highway and there's no driving once you get off the highway it just says like three minutes

so i'm like oh i don't remember her living like right off the highway and i pull into this container parking lot like full of giant shipping containers like going like overseas like those types of ones long beach is like a huge port well you don't know that i'm in long beach yet neither do i no it just kept saying towards long beach which like if you're if you're not familiar with the california highway system like it says like toward like to get home i get on a thing that goes towards sacramento which is like eight hours away so in my head i'm like it's plausible that this is just the direction we're heading whatever yeah yeah and it goes like arrived and i'm just in a shipping container in a container i'm in a container and it was like

it was like where i had always envisioned what the where the mafia would drop off like dead bodies like i'm in the middle of fucking nowhere surrounded by shipping containers yeah my sister's a trendy girl i'm like okay may you know maybe because i haven't been to her new spot like maybe this is where it is and it's gonna like spit me out yeah nope and so i look where i am i'm fully in long beach which if you're not familiar with los angeles is not echo park could not be further away i don't even know if it's considered los angeles it's not so i'm in a different part of california with no dog and uh and so i called my sister she was supposed to end the address with like boulevard and she ended it with like avenue so it took me

to the same address in a different city got it which is not echo park yep and so she now it's like 9 30 she was like do i just get her tomorrow i was like nope like i sunk cost like i've already put so much time into this like i need to just get the dog yeah drove up got her brought her home we're good now how long did it take to get from long beach to echo park uh all in all i was in the car for a couple hours let's just put it that way yeah i listened to a lot of joe rogan oh yeah yes because i looked up i wanted to listen to a nate bargetzi podcast and i couldn't really i assumed he had his own i couldn't find it but he went on rogan and uh yeah so i listened to a joe rogan episode nice how was nate he's

i think he's the funniest man he's like timing is unbelievable i think what's so impressive about him is that he doesn't like swear or he doesn't like say anything vulgar and i think to be that funny just based off just like using kind of day-to-day like mundane stuff yep is really impressive because he's not like there's no shock factor you know what i mean he's just like i don't know i like his vibe yeah i mean that's kind of like all we do is just like drop fucking shit to get a laugh right tatas tata tutu tutu crumpo crumpo gets a big crumpo gets a big one but nate just wouldn't dip right he does not he does not meddle in the crumpo pot he wouldn't yeah but you know what they say about play date i'm smoking on that crumpo

pull up we're smoking that crumpo pack i had a dream last night oh let me know brother i dreamt it was a horror it was a nightmare i had a nightmare last night it was horrible i had a horror dream i had a horror dream and it was just i was trying to log into something and i couldn't like spell my password right yep and it was it felt like 10 hours and then i could and then i got the password but then i had typed in the email wrong and it was like i kept like waking up and be like oh my god this is fucking annoying and then going back to bed and just having the exact same dream it was the worst dream ever the worst ones are are like that where it's a real activity like i'd rather just be like a demon melting my face off at that point

because then i can wake up and be like all right well obviously that's not gonna happen but this time i was like god damn is this gonna happen to me is this like a premonition um so i'm getting my haircut tomorrow cool and i had a dream last night where because i've been like debating getting bangs again yeah and in my dream i like went to get my haircut and it didn't look different at all and then but i had to go to work in an hour so i was like freaking out over the fact that i needed to get back to the salon get my bangs and get to work in an hour so what is it what i think it what's the i think i feel like i don't i shouldn't get bangs yeah i like your hair as is right now thanks i would like huge bangs huge like down to your chin oh yeah yeah that'd

be good i mean i feel like that could be good yeah well lauren and i hung out this weekend yeah that was fun yeah i know what you told me on friday you said i'm not gonna see you this weekend i know i'll see you monday that's why i was frustrated was like i was like ah because i do my thing is like i want i want to be invited but i did you literally no i literally i told i was like knock it like the last thing i said to him before he parted away i was like all right not gonna see you this weekend brothers catch you on monday i thought you because you had the dog and i know and i wouldn't have been able to come but then someone posted a story and it was like it was like lauren chester and jerry at a bar and i was like yeah i would have brought we'd

falbo found a way angus falbo egglamises he's egglamises you ever met him no he's like he's like falbo's like writing partner that he's doing this movie with egglamises yeah that's crazy i don't think i met this guy he was sitting right next to tyler or he like took tyler's i don't think i really spoke to him yeah he's a man mia was there he's not a real guy i'm so mad all weekend i was like i want to convince him there's a guy named egglamises you had me for a second you had me for a second you had me and i was there lauren was like wait what is that name egglamises is that an all-time thing like pull up me and egglamises are hitting the bar well it's also like i my my knee jerk was like fake name but

then i was like what if he listens to this and it's me being like what a stupid name it's an ice cream place in like ohio i think i uh i tell you i'm i think i'm switching banks i had we i think we're i think our podcast has gone too far we're doing too many episodes this is a real you'll actually like this story okay so we're getting we're getting ready to go to breakfast if you work at if you work at td bank yeah fucking count your numbers okay good or count your count your number i guess that's probably what you're doing count your days td bank because i am furious this was i thought i literally thought i was getting pranked so we're getting ready to go to breakfast i check my amex app my bill like i paid my bill and usually it

posts immediately it's been like three days it hasn't posted so wait for your credit card for my credit card i pay it from my checking account right and so you know however much i'd paid had gone through but it wasn't reflecting that on my balance so i call amex they're like no worries we just need to do a we need to set up a three-way call with your bank it'll take two seconds we'll get it going 45 minutes of waiting of the same theme song for 45 minutes i'm like theme song like just like jazz whatever the waiting holding music is and uh finally get a hold of the bank they're like they're like all right yep we just need to verify it to you like you know read your account number we're at the final stage the woman hangs up call drops i'm like oh

my god i'm panicking i call the number back they won't let me do it i set up a new call i went another 45 minutes uh the td person picks up the mx lady got bored and hung up so the now i'm trying to get the other mx lady on the phone i somehow patch in the original one she gets on she says it doesn't count if it comes from an outside line it needs to come from internally so we start again for the third time i i'm checking with her every 10 minutes to make sure she's still there she's still there the td person uh picks up after like an hour this time mx person hung up again so i'm now just complaining to the td woman like you gotta help me out i don't know what to do and then you hear the mx person sprint back to the phone and be like i'm here i'm here i'm here

and we it was a two second fix and they got it immediately got it it could it could have been it could have been two seconds and it was my whole morning so you're switching banks i do yeah or just like you've decided mentally that you're going to i'm checked out of this relationship yeah no pun intended yeah i just switched banks how'd that go good i'm i well i haven't officially closed my socko and bidford savings institution account but i have moved and put uh assets into an account at sofi which i picked because i think it lets you skip the line at chargers games and i didn't really have any other metric to go by when deciding a bank so well that's the most important feature of the bank well i was like waiting time at chargers yeah well

i was like yeah i don't know like i was like i don't know which one to do i was like well i know for a fact this one lets me skip the line at chargers games so right also i think they have good rates what does that mean like you you you're you have good interest rates on like your savings account uh this is good stuff this is good this is good good good because you're saying about so far there's no brick and mortar location so i guess all the money they save on bricks they put towards their interest rates um all right i i have a good story i have an actual i have an actual play date story but also notice that we're all wearing our burks and hats burks and hats burks and well we do this every day i know i wanted to just be like more like you guys burken hat

it's fifty thousand dollars um i met i show up to brunch the other day with birdie in hermosa and uh there's a table directly next to us and a woman has her chair pulled out like all the way into my empty chair okay and so i can't get there and i'm like oh excuse me excuse me okay it's like at an angle whatever like the way she's sitting the way she's sitting she's like kicking back in her chair and so i can't get into my seat so i finally get her attention whatever she kind of squares it away and it's clear everyone at the table dislikes this woman okay and so i was like maybe she's just this rude all the time and that's why her friends don't like her whatever kind of forget it go back we're having a nice brunch together me my mom her friend and the

dog and my girlfriend and then i'm not really paying attention to the people over there and then at some point uh this woman like we ordered mimosas jesus we ordered mimosas this table next to us like sees that it's a good idea they order mimosas only the three women get them and the annoying one doesn't get one like they don't bring a glass for her it wasn't like she wasn't drinking one and they brought four glasses like they didn't bring her a glass i forget about it when we get up the woman who was being annoying has her own table and is no longer with those people and i put it all together that woman was not part of their party she sat down at their table and was like crashing their brunch and was like an insane person she had gotten mimosas for

herself at a table for one and was yelling over to the girls that she was originally sitting with like look mimosa time we're all doing it and i'm looking no one with me is is seeing this happen but i can't be like i can't address it yeah you make a whole scene we're right there and so we didn't get to talk about it until we left but like how insane do you have to be to sit down at someone else's table and be like mimosa time yeah i i mean that is kind of awesome i guess that might be this guy rocks he was pulling up at a random table me like mimosa time well it's like it's like the single rider line that ryan pitched oh yeah yeah or wait what was i just thinking of that was like a pitch oh when you're talking about being on hold didn't someone

pitch or did i just like read this dm and we never actually pitched it but it puts all the people on hold yeah all the people on hold get on one call with each other that's good so it's like you can just chat with some randos instead of having to listen like a chat room i would have been trying to get every single one of them to hang out do you think there'd be guys jerking off on that too yeah like omegle no i'm not like being a perv i'm just saying that's what happens when you give you give people anonymous access to anything they will jerk off yeah it's kind of like a give a mouse a cookie situation give him not give a guy a chat room he's gonna want to he's gonna he's We just have to be real about what the stakes

are here. If that was a real thing, I would just blast heavy metal music into the thing so that everyone would have to hang up. Oh, and like you would clear out the queue? Yeah. That's a good point. Wait, what was I doing? What were we just talking about? Something viral. The mimosa time lady.

Mimosa time. Yeah, I don't know. Maybe it wasn't that. What did you guys do this weekend? I had a little Sunday Funday yesterday. Oh, that's what yeah go you go do you have a sunday fun day yeah i had a fun time yeah i just went to my friend sasha's uh she's a pool at her apartment it was so beautiful we just uh hung out in the sunshine drank aperol spritz and i didn't have any scaries because i was making good use of my day did you take my advice that's what i that's what i was talking about yesterday was that uh like people

use sunday as like not even part of the weekend like you're already getting prepared for the week and that's why you get stressed out if you just use Sunday as like another Saturday and then deal with it on Monday morning. That's the key. Yeah, but then Monday sucks. I don't know. I had a bunch of beers yesterday and I feel fine. Yeah. Because it was like I

had the whole weekend to process it. Yeah. Yeah. I didn't do that. What did you do? I got a burrito. I went to the window. I got a steak and egg burrito. It was awesome. And then I took a nap, which was great. And then I went and watched. Oh my god.

I played Wings fan. I keep getting calls. Should we pick this up? Yeah, pick it up. It's like a dual. It's like another three-way call. Yeah. Hello?

Hey, my name is Derek Bond. I'm an attorney with the Fulton County Legal Affairs Division. Do you have a second to chat? Yes. So we received a formal complaint a couple weeks ago that an individual at this number falsely claimed to be with the Fulton County Building Department. I just wanted to, this is, just to be clear,

this is not a legal proceeding at this time. I'm in fact-finding mode. Do you have a second just to kind of elaborate on your participation in the sense of that? I am with the Fulton County Building Department. sir you you are not uh the uh fulton county legal affairs division has investigated this uh and if you kind of this is a prank call sir uh if you want you can verify my uh you can verify my id with the uh with the office of uh

legal affairs i can hand you my uh badge id fc-4178 um given that this is an active investigation i need you to i need you to confirm involvement before we proceed with the next steps i do not i do not confirm involvement this has to be a prank did you catch my badge id number uh like i don't have like a thing to test your badge id number um this is a good this is a good this is a good prank this is i like this this is this is not a prank i i can after this call i can pass you along for verification case id number 240078 you made that number up sir sir this doesn't classify the prank in my book misrepresenting yourself as an italian

official can lead to serious legal repercussions um i need to clarify if this was like we have phone records confirming that the call originated from this number and the uh affected party was fairly uh insistent that we follow up on this so i need i need before we kind of identify if we need to escalate this further i need confirmation from this number yeah no i do not confirm that you do not confirm it are you disagreeing with the phone records i don't know what you are referring to but i now i don't think i do confirm that okay i mean we have the the offensive part it had to do with a sauna uh in the back in the backyard um i i think the file that we have on on record is fairly detailed as it relates to the involvement of this number if you're saying

that somebody else used this number uh for that uh proceeding then i i'm i'm happy to take that on record and circle back with you but um i regardless of intent i need to confirm whether this is gone so it's a great it's a great prank unfortunately i have to go right now but if this is real i do not confirm involvement dude there was there was awesome there was part of shitting myself for a second there was part of me that was like there there's a chance will will and i are here it's a crime yeah we have been committing a crime i think it's a i think it's a misdemeanor at worst but dude you were my only thing was like this guy sounds too like how young is this department

wait how did you know we were recording right now yeah we actually are recording right now it's gonna be in the pod i didn't mean that um all right that was great i like that man all right that was great all right later man who was that you just dm'd me and was like i think it'd be funny to get you should give him his number yeah don't worry i said i said don't don't give his number to anyone yeah obviously i um that's awesome that's funny because i was like there's a chance

there's a chance it's real so it's like you can't like fully yeah it's also crazy that you were like let's answer this phone call right now we did it twice also why were there two numbers on there Oh, I don't know. That's weird. Maybe he's Google Voice. Fulton County, too. Was it in Fulton County? Yeah.

Well, he was trying to remember which was the one that had the mean dad. Yeah. It was somewhere in Georgia. He's right. So that was probably close, if not right. Wait, so are we committing a crime? Because it's not a real... Technically, I think impersonating a government official is a crime, but it's like such a

low stake. We're not saying... We're from a department that doesn't exist. Yeah. I mean, I don't even know. um all right should we do should we do the roadmap yeah yeah that was convincing you were right the hardest the thing that made it not believable was that the guy sounded like a guy yeah yeah otherwise you'd have it yeah you're doing roadmap already whoa be the shortest episode

of all time oh i think i'm gonna i think i'm gonna sell my car oh what yeah i want to get something cool in my car the jeep just breaks down what do you want i don't know i'm thinking like maybe like a bronco could be cool that would be sick that would be cool um i just am like constantly having trouble with the jeeps breakdown more than like yeah anything um i think like a smart car could be funny seriously i mean i think that would be a nightmare but like i actually fully support this i want you to get a smart car like a true i was thinking like bronco or a smart car is hysterical if you like if you picked if you picked a really normal like i could pick a really normal car and then spend the rest of the money on like tricking it the fuck out

yeah what would you do to a smart car put it on like 34 inch rims make it do that thing where it like bounces it'd be funny if you like you could drive and then it would like leapfrog the car in front of you it like shoots like it like shoots so much force down to the ground that like hops a car get one of those get a smart car that can hop cars it can grind it's like a metal plate so you're like driving you grind the median to like get around a car i think you could go on the boardwalk with a smart car really dude there there's this new or maybe it's not new but it didn't happen where i grew up maybe this is an la thing people just using the shoulder in traffic yeah that's i think that's la shit that is you have to be there's a special place in hell for

those people you ever see that you know like francis ellis yes okay it's exactly it's exactly that he just like what's your take on this lauren he would just like people were driving on the shoulder so he just went like in standstill traffic he just pulled fully into the shoulder and stopped oh i do that to block people yeah you do that not fully but i'll like kind of i'll sort of pull over you're like a like a like a vigilante yeah rogue civilian like why are you doing that that's crazy i don't have the balls to stand out yeah uh but then people let them in why are you letting them in they just cut you yeah no i will yeah i don't know i do this new move i guess i'm not really want to talk but i have a new move brian brian does it too there's a

new lord just dropped people think brian's like up there um there's huge line accumulates for one light one intersection one intersection that uh you have to turn left onto like the green the green arrow is only on for like seven seconds so like if you wait in this line you're just there for like 15 minutes but what i do is i just go through the light and then i just pull a u-turn just no one's on the other side of the intersection got it is that a dick move or it's like i'm almost making the line short yeah why doesn't ever yeah affect anyone i go up there and just banging you and you can see people that have been waiting there for like 10 minutes being like you motherfucker oh the the sorry i right after i pulled that move

you know the girl in the elevator with the dog yes the whole story whatever she is walking the dog and now we kind of like are somewhat friends you know what i mean we've talked enough and so i tried to like beep beep to be like hey like how's it going because the dog had its cast off whatever and she had her airpods in and so i went like beep beep and she didn't look up and the car in front of me thought that i was honking because i'm not having like if we were having a conversation he could turn around and figure out that the reason i was honking was because i was talking to my friend and so i honked she doesn't look up from her phone and the guy in front of me turns around was like what because it was no turn on red so i was honking at a guy who wasn't doing

anything wrong did you go like i i was like sorry i was like this she's right but you can't be like you can't explain like someone you kind of know is right there uh i was gonna i was talking about my sunday fun day when you got when that rude playmate interrupted us no but uh i watched i i i birded it up i played three games of wingspan this weekend i'm getting good uh but then we watched white lotus have you guys watched yeah i'm watching the new season i want to talk about are you out on it in general i'm not loving the new season i just have been told everyone in my life is like trying to shove it down my throat and i'm worried i am always wary of those things when someone's like you have to watch this you would love it yeah you don't know what i like

yeah that's fair uh well we had like a watch party it was fun so i think i got a new crew that i can do watch party with every sunday which i think that's a great like sunday thing because it's like in the evening too and it's like that's what me and mia do yeah yeah kind of like give some life to your sunday um i think i think it's good i am enjoying it really yeah i low i don't care about like the ladies the older ladies as much they're all bitches like they all care about the ladies and the family is insane i feel like there's some incest family i know i know what i kind of like that plot line weird because it's weird and and like their accents are weird you know the you know the british girl who's dating that would or whatever

yeah i love her from sex education yeah she's great she's great and then she is the most horrible boyfriend in the world i know he's was it fiction or real fiction fiction but the first season we after we started season three last week we were like so disappointed that we were like let's just restart season one and i love season one oh i think season two but i like two is definitely better i like two better yeah well anyway i thought it was fun it's i like having to show that like other people are watching yeah traders trying to catch up on severance traders could be cool i think survivor starts on wednesday wednesday i think my grandma says wednesday i think i kind of do say it like that eight people eight different people this weekend

were raving about severance like no one will shut up about it i know well i tried to watch i started it this weekend and i immediately fell asleep but i was also really tired going into it so i can't really that's not an indictment of the show that was that's like uh lord of the rings for me yeah like i've never have made it out of the shire what's i've never seen it they start in the shire it's like a i wish the whole movie was in the shire and then they go and they get into kind all sorts of shenanigans but i only watch it on sundays i've only tried i've only attempted to watch it on sundays got it and everyone knows i get very sleepy on sundays so it doesn't fall asleep before they make it out of the shower and then when i wake up i'm lost i don't know where

it is yeah it's that's yeah i don't even know at all i actually had a i woke up at like i feel like in college i used to do this like every night where i would fall asleep watch something and wake up at like 3 a.m on the couch like stumble to my bed or don't and now i feel like I'm pretty good about going to my bed. But on Friday night, I passed out watching Severance and I woke up at 2 a.m. on my couch. I saw a tweet that was like, planning to be asleep in my office

so my boss has to carry me to the meeting. That's funny. This podcast is brought to you by Triple. Triple is the original high seltzer with three milligrams of THC and just 15 to 20 calories. triple offers a social buzz similar to that of your favorite hard seltzer light on calories high on life it's all natural gluten-free and again just 15 to 20 calories willie what do you love so much about triple man well i mean seriously the calories combined with the great flavors i

feel like i'm beating a dead horse here but every weekend i love these things even more friday night i had several triples was feeling great hanging out with my friends we had a great time and i got up the next day and i felt great and i went for a big long run and it didn't even stop me you know it's so it's just it makes you feel good and it tastes good triple is born from a desire to blend thc's social buzz with the social ritual of sipping on a seltzer triple is currently available at grocery stores liquor stores bars and restaurants in missouri kansas iowa louisiana georgia florida and south carolina it will be available in illinois arizona and ohio by the end of the year All right, here?

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Triple, redefining the party landscape. Let's get back into the episode. What else is going on in our lives? I did some other stuff, I think. Should we roadmap it up? I bought a... Wait. Wait.

I bought something. I think. No, I didn't buy anything. Worst podcast of all time. I think I bought something. No, I could have sworn

I bought something or did something. I either bought I think I bought or did something. Explain to me the scoring of Wingspan. Does it end in a number

or is it just... Yeah, I mean, it's pretty, it's kind of what you'd expect. It's a combination of eggs laid, tuck birds,

cash food, end of round goals, feathers, and bonus cards. Wait, Will, didn't you... That is exactly what I would expect. Yeah, exactly. So it's six categories,

and you just aggregate the score. Yes. Didn't you start Fins, man? Oh, that was my big day on Friday. They've been teasing this Fins fan. It's like a fish version. Teasing it how? On the subreddit, I've been seeing things.

And then I look on Friday, and it's like it came out, it dropped only in brick-and-mortar stores today. So on Friday, I called Barnes & Noble. They put it on hold behind the desk, and then I went right after work, and I got it. I thought in my mind it was going to be like when the new Harry Potter books dropped and I got there and the guy was like, yeah,

we have it on hold for you. And I look and there's like four on the shelf behind me. It's like, there's no reason. Did you, did you hear someone say brick and mortar this weekend and you decided you were going to say it more? No, I just had two things about brick and mortar stores. Well, we were talking about mortars last week.

Well, I think it's just, that's the big, that's the big perk of SoFi and that was the condition of the Wings, Fenceman release. what is a why is a i understand why it would be a brick store but why is it a mortar store i don't even know what mortar is i think it's like a cannon what i think it must mean like ford everything because it's also in your yeah it's the stuff that goes in between bricks that's what i was yeah oh fills the gaps but anyway so we get this fins man and we're thinking oh it's gonna be like a new skin on like the bird game so we can just play with fish now totally different

game we got really overwhelmed trying to learn it so we just played wingspan twice and then i'm gonna learn finspan this week but i couldn't really unpack it all at once do you have any friends coming into town i feel like you have this is your longest stretch i know i got a month no friends no travel i'm pretty excited i'm just gonna be straight vibing as i say i guess that's just like a thing i've been saying but i got cy and jake coming in march i think i need to get a dog like this weekend has made me be like i was wondering i definitely do it yeah but i will say she's way more calm than i like i don't think i could get a puppy yeah i'd have to go like um adopt a dog they found her apparently on the side of the road in a box

that's in like the desert like your sister did or like no like whoever they rescued it from got it her from was she a baby when they found her well that's the thing they don't like they still know how old she is you can't like carbon date a dog yeah she's she's chill as hell she doesn't does she want to talk at all or do you have anything to add stories or anything she doesn't really eat a lot either um which has been interesting she loves i've learned she loves salami though oh me too i salami max last night i had no you know those things that are like a little piece of cheese wrapped in salami of course i went to this white lotus watch party and i brought that as like a appetizer you know like a little where was this watch party it was at my friend's

house in venice and i brought and she had set out all a big stack of those exact things so we just had like 40 of the salami wrapped cheese things but it was great it was the best problem i've ever had and it was like we were grilling and it was like bring your own meat we're gonna fire up the grill you just toss shit on so scott and i went to get meat at davy jones liquor locker love davy jones liquor locker it's a great have you actually done yeah did i not tell you my davy jones liquor locker story no i'll tell you after okay it's like it's it's more than just a liquor store they got everything they got sandwiches they got so you're like oh they'll have like some burger meat or whatever they only have impossible burger meat so we bought two impossible burgers that's what i

had for dinner last night oh not great no impossible burger meat sounds like it would like the second you put it on the grill it like explodes it felt yeah it's like oh it's impossible to make a burger out of this meat it's meat but it's a challenge it's not even like it's it's not a health thing it's more just for guys that grilling has gotten too easy yeah it's so hard to grill but good luck i've had a few good impossible burgers it was fine it was just we bought it frozen too so like it hadn't thawed and then it was pink in the middle which i think is fine because it's not meat but what was it made out like what was the what is i have no idea impossible i don't it was people have tried to figure out it's literally impossible but we just

i put a nut cheese and ketchup on it that it was still good but last time i was at davy jones liquor locker yeah i walked in and there was a woman wearing uh an east booth bay hoodie which is like a very specific town in maine that we like live in it would be like if you like saw someone wearing like a lancaster yeah you know what i mean like the only person that would be wearing that is someone that like is from is from there right so i was just like oh i you know i live on and i said the street and she was like what are you talking about i was like yeah you know like in like east booth bay she's currently wearing an east booth bay sweatshirt probably like thrifted it or something and she was like i don't know what you're talking about and i was

like your sweatshirt and she was like oh yeah and it made me made me mad and all the la like thrift heads like you didn't even read it you didn't read what the sweatshirt says yeah hey here's a psa if you're wearing a sweatshirt with a town on it you better know every street there i agree i'm gonna want to talk about it at least know some of the streets yeah i saw a guy in new orleans i was walking down the street and he had a une hoodie on it's good stuff and i was like i had i went like oh you went you go to une and he was like oh my daughter goes there and i said oh my parents live in biddeford not true yep but i just panicked i walked i was like why they said my parents live yeah it's just one town over from the truth yeah he would have yeah that's

interesting you want so desperately to be connected to it yeah i just lied i uh i had a similar situation it's kind of like when a guy's wearing a band shirt yeah it's a band you like so you want to talk about it but like they clearly don't i basically i was at a bar one time this guy was wearing an allison chains shirt yeah and he was crying at the bar oh and uh i walked up to him and i was like oh nutshell which is like their most popular song he would be like stop calling me it would be like the fifth guy who's called me that today it would be like if like what's the most popular like taylor swift song uh i think now it might be cruel summer so you walk it'd be walking up to someone in a taylor swift shirt and just being like oh cruel summer like anyone

yeah if you've heard of the band you know that or whatever and he was just like thank you so much i was like what and he was just like i love alice in chains so much oh my god and i was like yeah they're pretty yeah they're pretty good and he was just like this saved my night and i was like oh okay and then he stayed with us the whole night it was like such a bummer like it was it was like it was like a it's like feeding a stray cat and then they like now they like come to your door every day we were like oh i should have just held my tongue or i like that you're like oh nutshell and he's like no my name's andy just start sobbing that was like what his high school bullies called him yeah don't call me that my name's fucking andy he used to eat he used to

eat the pistachios whole everyone called them nutshell oh my god on uh last friday night last friday night having a menage a trois um i was eating sunflower seeds and i swallowed a whole one it's gonna grow on your tummy now and i it could not stop thinking about it it hurt and then it hurt like going down a little and then the whole night i was like oh guys i think i fucked up i was totally fine ruining everyone's night i was ruining everyone's heart so bad on the way oh god you know it's gonna burn me it's gonna shred me like a paper shredder with comes out sideways yeah it comes out grabs like all your or just the middle part comes out oh it spits out the shell my butt spitting on the shell of my butt

when i was a boy this is the shit guys like spitting out that shell with your butt this is it that's awesome lightning in a bottle this is what we capture on this podcast you're literally watching this clip this spin the sunflower seed out with shell with your butt like your whole body did the whole spitting and like a sunflower seed out of your butt is insane that sky stuff 101 when i was a kid i didn't know how to eat sunflower seeds but i thought it like looked really cool it's sick i still don't know i don't even like it that much oh i love them but i remember i would just put a bunch in my mouth and suck all the seasoning off and spit them out whole that's what i do yeah and my mom walked in and there was a just a huge jar because when you

like if you're spitting them out but they're you've taken the seed out yeah they can kind of compress more but if you're just putting wet sunflower seeds back in the jar it was it's essentially just pouring them in yep and she walked in there was a whole like mason jar full of untouched sunflower seeds i was like what are you doing my cheek was shredded and you're just like i don't know oh my cheek you're shredded i'm gonna shred those cheeks girl oh yeah oh when's the last time you shredded cheek when i was pooping out that sunflower seed dude i think turned me into a how's your hashed horse potato wedge uh all right should we road map it up birdie roadmap orion micho just texted me just doing my monday morning check-in did he say that

yeah that's kind of nice we have a oh guys if you're listening to this our mafia episode or mafia video has just come out oh yes lauren will me binder liam and angus did a mafia video in this We played Mafia Studio And we got to the bottom of it Towards the end Yep It's a very interesting video

Go watch it on the Friday Beers YouTube Yeah look up We'll put the link In the description to it Right now Yep But it's a great video

You're gonna love it I'm excited We have a lovely episode For you guys today We're gonna hear We're gonna do the Permitting division Of the building department

Do you have one? I don't have one Permitting? Well I I'm down to skip this episode I don't have one I think it's Will's turn That's why he's down

I don't have one. Oh, that's cool. We'll do it next week. All right. We're going to hear your pitches followed by our pitches. Then we're going to do, this guy rocks, this guy rocks, this guy rocks today. Hey, hey, well. And then we're going to do everyone's favorite segment, teach me something.

Followed by new names for jobs. And then dance moves that don't exist. It's going to be a great episode. I'm very excited. Lauren play that theme music because daddy's got to go pee don't you wish you could just hit skip on the worst parts of your life

you know the same way you can skip an ad I get it I'm Siaya and I live in Ice Cove I've made some questionable decisions that didn't end up the way I planned and today I'm still figuring it out somehow things usually get worse before they get better

Apparently, that's how I roll. So bundle up and come along for the bumpy ride. Stream a new episode of North of North Tuesdays on CBC Gem. All right, we are back. Lauren accidentally kept Will's real phone number. I'm not paying attention to that now. I guess if I take it out. We're going to take it out, but I just got a phone call

while we stopped using the bathroom for a second from evidently a playmate that said, Hey, so I think you left your real phone number in Monday's episode. it'll be fixed by the time you hear this though so no funny business no funny business dude i also birdie got scared and went under the chair and now i can't get her out oh but there's a fake birdie there's a fake birdie but i oh kevin king too i put some bird crumb bird crumbs i put some bread crumbs on the ground so i'm hoping to coax her out but she feels a little scared right now what i thought she doesn't get scared i feel like she always liked that though they like to be like

under things she does she did that whenever she felt neglected this weekend she would go under the bed and then i had to like coax her out she's coaxed out oh what about some peanut butter she didn't like peanut butter first dog ever that doesn't like peanut butter i tried to give her peanut butter i said she didn't like it she's also allergic to chicken oh how do you even find that out that's what i my sister was like her intestines get swollen we were like you don't know that i'm not a doctor what about almond butter you show that i think she loves almond butter yeah have you ever had barney butter it's insane is it really yes that's awesome i highly recommend all right you hear some pitches lauren pitches pitches pitches pitches this is from

christian bernard he says hey lauren and the rugrats on no i like it on accelerator yeah yeah true true oh wait i'm gonna bleep that and replace it with now say it start over okay hey lauren and the rugrats on oh fuck hey lauren and the rugrats on accelerator what is the worst part about eating cheese poop makes your tummy hurt okay uh i can't stop i literally can't i'm addicted it's so good there's too many good kinds oh i cheese max last night and i'm feeling it christian says you never have the perfect amount of crackers to match the quantity that's true of cheese and the crackers these days are too fragile to spread a hunk of cheese on them

without breaking the answer to this age-old dilemma is chi rackers imagine your cheese of choice enclosed in layer of your favorite cracker no excess crackers or cheese no mess simply the slice and in simply what simply slice and enjoy and every bite has the perfect ratio of cracker to cheese that's so good i imagine like the you know those pretzels that are filled with peanut butter yep like cracker filled with like gouda that sounds awesome well wait but how would you you just line it i think and they would have to be refrigerated yeah i think that sounds great you know what i was i had a few of yesterday that i was really remarking on how delightful they are club crackers like the underrated but that's like the best shit in the world

you don't like them they're so butter they don't go with the types of cheeses that i like you're eating cheeses i haven't even thought of i mean cheeses that no one's even no one's even churned up yeah i'm a triscuit and sharp cheddar girl yeah no i go i go a cracker and like a mozzarella i got that really thin american like that really thin brown cracker with gouda on top and then an apple on top thin brown cracker which one crackers i guess but it's like a you recognize it almost looks like a pita thing they're good they're really yummy like a from checks mix no i'm not describing well but just it's a i go crack cracker goo to apple cracker goo to salami where's cracker wheat thin where's cracker wheat thins are ass angus

uh wheat thins wait you don't like wheat then hate oh i love triscuits are way better i like wheat thins better than triscuits triscuits are like eating a brillo pad uh yeah yeah what like sometimes i like i sometimes i scrub my pans with triscuits sometimes i'll be eating triscuits and go what are we even doing here no i do like the ones where you get like the cracked pop pepper and sea salt also just nostalgic for me because my dad whenever i feel like whenever i'd come home from work or just on a on a sunday afternoon he would be in the kitchen like slicing cheddar there would always be triscuits and cheese on the counter like that was his thing so then it became your dad did that every day like a lot of days that's really cool he was cheese mac my dad used

to my dad used to we would get triscuits and um cheese whiz like the can yep and just i don't think i've ever had cheese my grandpa loved it i guess it's genetic i've i've strayed away hereditary it's hereditary yeah my jeans i can't stop it cheese with you had jeans one time i cheese is coming out what is she coming out no it's pointing out his jeans oh when when will's family had a had a christmas party a couple years ago two christmases ago their spread was insane you guys know how to snack right my mom cheese maxed yeah me and kevin were were were cheese maxing she uh yeah my mom she balled out kevin cheese mac bro my uncle kevin literally survives he just eats cheese and crackers and drinks mountains

gallons of Mountain Dew and watches play to it and like pop tarts and stuff I think too yeah I think he's he might be listening to us right now

and we it could be there could be a secret because like he's in his mid to late 50s now and he has not one gray hair

yep Kevin's 50 he's like 55 or something now I'm not blowing smoke up his ass right now I literally thought

Kevin was like 39 exactly he looks great there's something something to it no one's ever tried it before no one's ever tried the cheese and cracker mountain dew diet right it's it's like a cousin of keto yeah it's like

some sort of scientific anomaly that results in de-aging yeah um should we do the other pitch yeah speaking of de-aging you see that fucking guy that's like i've reversed my age by 50 years and he's like i'm gonna live to a thousand years old he like he just looks like a boy he looks like a boy that grew up to be a man it's like he doesn't look healthy like i think on paper where he's the healthiest man alive but like i don't see the vision he moved his office into a into like a cryo chamber he's like a gas mask on while he's working it's like that's not there's absolutely no way that's the healthiest thing you can be doing this is just a random guy i mean he's made a career off like i'm the healthiest man alive got it but i think i

from what i gather i think he made some absurd amount of money in like tech or something and it's just like i'm gonna live forever now try some weird shit yeah so dana white talking about he's a friend uh that he claims has like a trillion dollars and uh has a lab of scientists that live in his house and their only job is to make him live to as long as he can that seems sad yeah i would just be like i don't want to live i don't want to live past like the second i start declining i'd say the moment i hit 150 i'm done yeah i don't want to live past 150 my mom used to say if she gets like dementia or something i should take her on a walk and forget to forget to put the brake on her wheelchair let her go off a cliff she gets the

mentors okay that'd be the worst way to go out thank you we need to get birdie out i feel bad why she's chilling i think she's okay but that's very sweet for you to be concerned okay thank you christian this is why i think i i don't think i should get a dog because i don't think you give a shit i don't give a shit well i mean i do give it like i would give a shit if it was like something more serious but i feel like she's chilling down there yeah i guess i just i know her a little bit better now after a couple days there and like if the only time she's gone under the bed is when she felt like neglect well she has her head down now like she's not like like she she's chilling her head's on the floor um next pitch we were birdie and i were turkey

maxing yesterday really oh my god she loves turkey that's awesome yeah i feel like because she lives with my vegan sister so i feel like i'm like showing her a new world ever tell you about our uh one second did you just eat a lucy why did he went sorry um when my dad was a senior in college he got a golden retriever okay and i think when you get one of those you're not like thinking about how long it's gonna live yep and it just lived in it saw like both of my sisters get born like it was just like that's awesome it was around for a while and he was saying like one day like i think this is specific to golden's like when it's their time to go it happens like very quickly you know as other dogs there's like kind of a gradual decline and he was like her leg

or like back legs stopped working or something he was like all right we'll like give it a week whatever and she was like it seemed like she was in pain so he like took her to put her down but he was like we're gonna have like the greatest day ever before so he took her to mcdonald's was like giving her like cheeseburgers and fries and stuff and it was like she could like couldn't even keep her head up and they pulled into the vet and he was like i think she knew what was about to happen and got out of the car and was like running around like miraculously was like clean bill of health and lived another like eight years oh my god something like he was like he was like i still to this day it was like it's the only it's one of the only things in life where i'm like i have no

idea that happened yeah my that's awesome my golden pat he was 14 when he died which is like pretty good life but he passed away in his sleep which was like so sad for my family yeah you don't get yeah although that i mean it was peaceful for him i just how long very traumatizing for my mom yeah this is messed up but how long how long of a nap before you're like i don't i think kevin's not around i don't know but like how long was he how long was he dead before they were like i didn't ask for the details they just called me in the morning and i was like oh no i remember my mom they were clearly gonna put down addy and she was like you guys should you guys should say goodbye daddy and we didn't know what that meant so we were just like no i'll see her later like walked

past and like went and watched tv and i was like that's well that i think i told you guys but when we had to put down cookie my brother it was like his first time drinking the night before and so he was like hungover but like couldn't show it and something they were like all right we're gonna go take cookie to get put down he's like i don't care he stayed in bed yeah oh all right what the hell sam we have another pitch oh sorry i was just doing like a fourth wall breaking thing to my brother in case he's listening he's not oh he's got big tech deals and dates to go on and your brother's awesome tech he's doing like crunching numbers and making your family proud making my mom proud because he has a real job that makes sense to her and like it's something she understands

she doesn't just have to take his word for it that it's a real job yeah i've always thought about like what if we were just lying to our parents this whole time like taking out loans to make it look like we were making money i mean like i came here and like showed her the office she's like okay all right i maybe believe it's real now i saw uh i saw a bunch of comments we post like a wheel you know the wheel video we do every friday yeah all the comments were like this isn't real work or whatever which definitely isn't one of the comments was like what do you want everyone to be like bricklayers like so like like someone has to the world needs ditch diggers too yeah um when i went to pick up birdie they have another dog named rosie

apparently when she gets so excited she barks so hard that she like she farts because like all the muscles been there she's just like and it's like like she can't keep the farts in in the room it smelled like something died in the room and my sister was like yeah this just happens when she gets excited and i was like that feels like we gotta get that checked out yeah the dog get excited multiple times a day that can't just be something we've accepted all right can i do the other pitch yes please all right thank you christian next one is from brian vicente he says what's up billy dusty and lauren a big fan of the show what is the worst part about being able to or about not being able to watch a big game new episode of your favorite show or any other

significant event live like everyone else knows about it except for you so you have to like keep your head in the sand until you watch it yeah trying to not look at get a notification or text or something okay the fact that everyone's talking about it and you either get spoiled or can't feel the same excitement when something notable happens my business is the world revolves around you is looking to change that tell us what you can't watch and our ai integrated platform will identify and cache every pertinent notification you get relating to the event they will be silenced on receipts you can live your life spoiler free the best part is that once you start watching the app will feed you notifications as events happen in the game slash episode so you can

properly react with your friends less than friends and randoms on social media you can even link your cable account and will automatically record what you're trying to watch if you can't watch the game don't take a step back with our app the world revolves around you i love that my grandpa used to record giants games because they were on too late and you'd watch them in the morning on monday yep i remember just being like what is the what is the point of that yeah i'm a big believer like i know some people yeah they'll do that like even if they know who won they'll still watch the game like i could not care less the the only reason i'm watching it is because it's happening in real time i have no interest in watching a game after i'll watch maybe some highlights yeah sports

center i'm excited for baseball to be back huh home runs triples doubles singles a bunch of hot Singles. I like baseball. Swinging for the fences. This episode is brought to you by Southern Comfort with one-of-a-kind blend of fruit and spices. SoCo Whiskey is the original ready-for-anything spirit, satisfying on its own and ideal in any mixed drink.

Southern Comfort is easy to enjoy however you drink it and whoever you drink it with. We think SoCo can go with everything, but you be the judge find your comfort zone and try out a cocktail today i created a new drink called the neil armstrong it is the lance armstrong it's interchangeable it's soco and root beer it is delicious lots and lots of ice soco sour shots add a little sour mix and enjoy keep it simple with soco with lemonade soco with orange juice soco cola there's all sorts of stuff willie i personally think the best place to enjoy soco is on the porch but what do you think i would like it

in uh the backyard and you're in a beach chair that's a little too low to the grass so you feel the grass on the backs of your legs as they extend out i like that no matter the moment southern comfort is ready for anything packed with flavor mixes with anything and it's easy to drink we challenge you all out there to find your comfort zone try some southern comfort mixed drinks and send us your favorites we'll shout out the best ones on a future pod pick up some southern comfort today well you know it's a play date because we're sipping on our accelerator oh come on that's a great sound that was a great time uh i gotta tell you i've been having this a bit of a a culture shift in my mind away from the orange ice pop to the cherry ice pop been slept on i'm ready to wake

up cherry ice pop is goaded you can't go wrong but i think uh i think i'm just having a little bit of a change in my flavor profile we don't have any with us right now but this morning i had a berry lemonade one very good as well get out of town here's the thing about me i'll say it i used to drink coffee every morning i drink accelerator in the morning now it's like starting your day with like a little treat but it's like 10 calories if somehow for the amount of caffeine that's in it i don't feel anxious at all yeah like i have one and i'm definitely like jacked up but i am not anxious at all that's i use it when i write my novels how's that going good um i'm almost through the first i almost have a good title and idea for it accelerator is great for

creating new characters too because i can imagine new worlds yeah look at this ready tom chikonsky what is he's the mayor of crimpville wow and he's never wrong he's never wrong never told never wrong he's never told a lie upgrade your energy with accelerator go to amazon grab some today folks you won't regret it let's get back into the episode all right what is the worst part about ordering fajitas at a restaurant it's a scene it's a it's a fucking it's a very look at me thing it's like when they might as well be bringing out a cake with like sparklers on it because now the whole restaurant's looking at you it's so loud on the way out silent fajitas a silencer it uh is like a dome that goes over the um cast iron and it's soundproof

so they bring it out people are still aware you're having fetus but uh it kind of softens the blow a little bit yep keeps the food hot and then because usually the fetus come out first and they're sizzling for like five minutes while everyone else's food are coming out yeah now it keeps it hot while you're waiting for everyone else's food when you take it off it's silent and we've well when you take it off how is it silent because it's not they're done sizzling okay it'd be funny if this was like an extra charge like it was like five extra dollars so for a silencer yes some some people in the restaurant have like really loud ones and then they like see the guy walk by like they take all the noise cool as a cucumber they take all the

noise from your fajitas and make the other people's loud. Twice as loud? Fajitas that are deafening. Oh, yeah. Well, that is awkward. That was my pitch. It's fajitas that are twice as loud. I think it's like an intentional thing that they make them really loud because they want people to look and then order them.

That's what they say about... That's the only reason I've never gotten fajitas. I was like a kid with my dad. I remember one time with my dad being like, can we get fajitas? And he was like, we were in Buckhead. georgia and we got we do i don't know why i'm drawing more attention to ourselves no we were like hell yeah it was like cool it was like this is shit guys do you know what i mean yeah is the burrito i i heard that the burrito is not like we like that's not real mexican food

like we made it up and then like they maybe adopted it yeah because of the popularity but like we it wasn't a thing for them i had so much mexican food on saturday tell me about it i got we went to venice beach bar watched sunset and i got tacos then we went to el chucho and then i ran across the street and got tacos oh yeah and then like two hours later i was like saw someone with a quesadilla i was like i want more so i went back and got a quesadilla so i had three mexican meals in like an eight hour span on saturday it was amazing you were tex maxing i was yeah yeah i was mex maxing uh all right pitch me willie all right what's the worst part about a uh two-way door you're like slamming into people um too many options yeah

i was more lawrence is where it's like if you go one way then you're swinging into one people yeah like our kitchen doors this is the three-way door so you can also just put your hands in the middle and they slide into the walls so if there's someone in the kitchen i don't want to barge in right so i can just slide them in and walk in if there isn't someone in there and i want or there's enough space and i want to do sort of a grand entrance then i kick them but i want to have the option to not make a scene you know as opposed to the traditional saloon doors in which you're sort of captivating everyone's attention you know just by walking in what was the point of saloon doors i think that's just how they because they didn't like it's not like they kept any like heat

in or out well they don't you don't have to like remember to close them behind you no but they were just like it's just belt to nipple oh yeah maybe to keep like make it feel a little more private hmm hmm i would love to have a grand entrance or yeah i guess what else can you kick open like if you killed all seven jenkins brothers with one bullet you can come in and go why was it why was it why were you allowed to do that in the wild west what you just kill guys murder i mean it had to be justified but like it was you were you were in charge of policing yourselves it felt like yeah because they didn't have law enforcement so they had but there was still a sheriff there that like if yeah or a marshal but i think they had like yeah they

didn't have like a whole police force they couldn't keep tabs on everyone right right all right unless you have a guy like rango right all right should we do um this guy rocks this guy rocks this guy rocks this guy rocks today pause this immediately and i mean immediately how can we not talk about family when family's okay are you guys familiar with a person by the name of sticks youngblood uh i don't think so this is a guy who or this is a person who um sticks young bone sticks young bone yes is obsessed with like i think he gets they get a lot of um inspiration from like motley crew like 80s bands okay and what they like to do is role play what it would have been like to be a rock star

named tix youngblood so let's give it a shot this sounds awful and the guitar solo here what yeah who that is cool down tommy jesus how many fans have we had backstage here Yeah. What have they ever done? Yeah. Exactly. Cool. Jesus. Can you just sound like you're something?

Hi. Hi. Madison, right? Yeah. We had a little intruder in here. Hi. Sticks. It's a pleasure. Have a seat. Have a seat. Yeah. It's your thing. Been a fan for a long time? Yeah.

Four years, huh? where you're strong i'd like to hear that that's what i'd like to hear yeah great sign your record to madison right yeah great oh my god i want to be madison so fucking bad all right oh yeah yeah really huh okay we can pause it here yeah i think that's great what's so interesting about sticks is a lot of people like to glorify what it was like to be a rocker yeah he shows the mundane he also shows a little turmoil within the band well tommy's letting too many people in the green room tommy no tommy tommy tommy the top comment is bro put himself in

imaginary danger tommy is upset that he's letting fans in and he's going you know what tommy how many fans have you had back here exactly and what happened oh oh i see the i got you yeah tommy doesn't want madison back there he's creating jealous he's creating beef with a band member that's not there band members that don't exist tommy tom yeah i like this guy a lot i would if i was tommy and my name was just tom and my um and my band name my band mate was named sticks youngblood i'd be a little upset as well i didn't i didn't get the memo that we had cool name sticks young blood young bone yeah is that not one of the strangest things you've ever seen yeah i don't some people and there are there are hundreds of those videos so first thing there yeah yeah i

don't get that at all but i kind of like do you think he does music well i've i've been i've been doing a deep dive it's mostly those horribly confusing okay what do we got here these are southern elephant seals and uh they let out sneezes that are pretty funny so this guy definitely rocks wait how cute wait play it again the last someone talks about how the fuck the last dude end up in a meadow yeah i've always i've always wondered how'd he get there it's extremely odd should we do teach me something teach me something did you know that there is a planet where it rains molten glass sideways at 5400 miles an hour earth not here okay this oh i wasn't to guess the planet no this exoplanet hd 189733b is located about 64 light years from earth

think about how far that is that's so many its atmosphere is made of silicate silicate particles and due to its extreme heat over 1700 degrees fahrenheit these particles condense into glass which then gets blown sideways by violent winds essentially if you stood there not that you could you'd be shredded by high-speed glass storms. Oh my gosh. That sounds horrible. Also, how do we know that? How do these guys know? Sometimes I feel like scientists

are just like, there's no way for them to call our bluff. Let's just, that would be cool. Maybe they sent one guy and he got shredded by high-speed glass storms. He came back, there's like holes in him and he's like, you do not want to go to HD 189733B. There's like satellites and stuff. I know, but like

that doesn't make any sense. I don't know. Dude, I still can't believe I can't get Birdie out here. Birdie! She probably got stage fright. Yeah, she got stage fright. She got embarrassed that she didn't have anything to say, and she would rather just... Wait, can we put the video right here of Will Will's finding his of Birdie getting off her chair and going under?

I want to see it. Wait, yeah. Well, I'm implicated. Oh, you were there? I was standing over there, and then she walked over, and then I knelt down, and I was like, hey birdie and then she went like oh and ran over so she hates you you get you spooked her i mean i didn't do anything but i spooked i just was myself sounds like you did something to her i didn't do anything on purpose to her okay do you know about timothy dexter no he called himself lord timothy

dexter he was a self uh he was an american businessman noted for his eccentric behavior and writings what year was this uh he died in 1806 okay so he was like in the like founding of america type vibes uh he was barely educated or literate and considered him the greatest considered himself the greatest philosopher in the known world and uh authored a book a pickle for the knowing ones which espouses his views and became notorious for its misspellings and grammatical errors so i just thought that guy's he was uh from newburyport massachusetts wait haven't you didn't wasn't he like the luckiest man alive too is this the same guy that like he he like i wish i remember this we talked about it like on like one of our first episodes

he i think this was the same guy oh fuck he like invented something and it was horrible but then it ended up like be i'm not doing it justice he invented something it failed but then it could be used for something else and like made a fucking killing he's yeah at the end of the american revolution he purchased largest large amounts of the depreciated continental currency that were worthless at the time and then at the end of the war the u.s government made good on its notes at one percent of face value but massachusetts paid it on at par so he made a ton of money off of this worthless currency and then built two ships and an export business yeah i keep reading about that i'm pretty sure that's where he made like another it has been census peculiar he was advised to send

bed warmers for resale yeah they pranked him willie so they he oh yeah they were this is crazy you know more about this guy some rival guy told him to send bed warmers to like a warm place like where it would be like a horrible business decision that ended up like also paying off somehow that's crazy i just like the idea that he was like couldn't read or write but he was this genius and he wrote this like book of philosophy that people like couldn't get through because of the ground he could still be right that's true we just couldn't put to words what he was saying all right willie would you rather do did you like it or it's a big dumb up or dumb down dumb up okay for that willie oh i know why she might be skittish when we were at brunch the

waiter stepped on her tail oh really and she like yelped and today no this is on sunday she's been very skittish about people should we do new names for jobs or dance moves that don't exist let's do uh dance moves that don't exist are we gonna see a performance there'll be some interactive elements for sure these are dance moves that don't exist the now you see me okay it requires you to be at a restaurant or a club that has like tablecloths and people are eating so you grab the tablecloth you rip it off without spilling anyone's food or drink you then take it you floss between your legs you hold it up like this and when you drop it you're nowhere to be found i mean that would be unreal if i ever saw that executed i've got making soup goes a little like this you

go yeah pretty good right you have like some sort of assembly line like one guy's doing yeah he couldn't even add to it but i think it's you know you chop it up you sprinkle it in and then this move is kind of what brings it together yep pretty excited about this move on its own but i think adding a little spice to it uh to the end the proposal you get down in the middle of a crowded club on one knee and you propose to your girlfriend the dj has to be in on it the d the music stops everyone a hush falls over the crowd because like this guy's proposing your girlfriend then runs at your hands and uses them as like a thing to do a backflip off of music cuts back in crowd goes like a stepping yeah you're holding it like this everyone thinks you're proposing she steps on your

hand and does a backflip that's amazing bananas that's sick i love that uh i've got the front front tonk tonk no uh bird watching this is a group dance that you do so one guy goes over and then he starts going like and then all of the people come by and they go and they flap their wings and run through the party and the guy goes i got one sort of like a live reenactment type thing but it brings the house down trust me right when the beat drops if you spot the bird yep uh i got the all right i got the wipe out okay all your friends get on the ground like those red balls from they curl up in balls like those red balls from wipeout and then you run across them and

then everyone gets up and starts dancing oh my god that sounds like it would hurt it would kill it would kill at this party uh shampoo this one's pretty pretty simple but all ladies love this one it's just a little and then and then you can follow it up with the conditioner stop you're turning lauren on can't help it can't help it she's rock hard over there i can't uh the weed whacker hit me everyone lines up like weeds your friend grabs you by your ankles spins you around you knock all the weeds over yahtzee you go this is the yahtzee

sort of a setup to a larger dance move i picture it like uh in that song that goes like fireball yeah do you do it yeah fireball love it uh my last one's the duel you stand back to back with your buddy take a step forward bang miss bang miss interlock arms spin each other around that would that's a hit yeah i've got the small straight it's a lot like the yahtzee just a little less exciting so it's like oh i love it all right we do new names for jobs yes these are new names for jobs mailman is now a letterhead like that uh the construction worker

that's tasked with uh the sign that directs cars stop smith i like that a lot barista's now a grinder like that uh a computer an it guy computer repairman is a click fixer uh cashier little banker love it podcaster just a potty drug dealer is now a street doctor uh an eight av uh an apiarist or beekeeper for the less educated just a beer he's a beer i like that it's it's fun because it sounds sort of like the drink right firefighters are not poseidon's boys i like that p boys maybe for sure yep po boys uh heard oh i know what this one is uh okay shepherd is now a blanket term for people who heard everything not just sheep just call him a herd why why take two syllables when you could do it with one a guy

who heard stuff is a herd oh i like that uh a gas station employee he's now pumpy pumpy i like that a fucking bitch fuck fuck loser fucker bitch a loser fucker that's a guy who plays for the yankees that's what they used to call me in high school zinger what they used to call me the loser fucker a loser because i had a horrible taste uh all right lauren who's per stout are you gonna steal this week oh man you start um i gotta think about it what's going on this weekend i had a moment this weekend where i decided i was gonna go to denver next weekend but i don't think i'm gonna do that what was that about this weekend i had like a buddy text me from denver that i haven't seen in a while and there's a show that i want to see in denver so i was like what

if i just went to denver but then i had had a few cores lights at that point i woke up the next day i'm definitely not going to denver mj lenderman was that one of your favorite concerts you've been to yeah it was the best one i've seen in a long time yeah um i'm gonna steal the dog whispers personality he's not a guy that like wrangles good dogs no makes bad dogs good dogs because i have to get birdie from out under this yeah i was gonna say you got you got your work cut out for you yeah i got it cut out um i'm gonna we've our lauren and i have i don't know i'm gonna do a personality for the week but we have our first softball game that i've been able to attend at least our second of the season tonight and i'm gonna steal juan soto's personality because he

went yard in his first mets at bat i'm gonna go yard tonight love it lauren why does my mind always go blank when we get to this segment i'll i'll take a i'll take a baseball players so i'm really good at softball who jose siri um mookie bets mookie bets wait no he's on the dodgers yeah i don't want what team you want the cubs i can't think of one guy just in general Pete Alonzo sure Pete Alonzo alright

we love you guys have a great rest of your Monday have a great Tuesday and we'll see you guys on Wednesday for our Wednesday episode we're getting naked

no oh have a great rest of your week a great weekend we'll see you guys he's never had a break not once we'll see you guys

on Monday we love you so so much comment comment Birdie Come at Birdie, good dog Or come at Birdie, come out from under there So we can get her out

Yeah, everyone coax Birdie out Love you, bye Drive safe This family is on the brink of civil war Mobland, the hit original series Is now streaming on Paramount Plus we are the harrigans don't know the net and google us from the underworld of guy ritchie do you want to step up the ladder i won't call my dead starring tom hardy pierce brosnan and

helen mirren do i have to do everything myself mobland new season is now streaming on paramount plus