Will & Rusty's Playdate - will got blocked by his hero

Episode Date: August 7, 2024

Will is back from the oil painting and the gang has their first beef as a podcast… with a high-profile celebrity. The boys struggle to understand what the deal is with Carl’s Jr., Rusty talks about stinking up a locker in high school and Willy almost gets upgraded on a flight. They also debut a brand new prank call segment, and it goes horribly! Finally, Will and Rusty draft YouTube pranks that don’t exist and share their favorite drinking games. FOLLOW OUR SOCIALS: https://www.flowcode.com/page/playdatepod DOWNLOAD THE APP AND TAKE CONTROL OF YOUR FINANCES WITH CASH APP. IT PAYS TO GET PAID ON CASH APP! https://apps.apple.com/us/app/cash-app/id711923939 YOUR SUMMER WARDROBE AWAITS! GET 20% OFF @CHUBBIES WITH THE CODE PLAYDATE20 AT https://www.chubbiesshorts.com/PLAYDATE #chubbiespod (00:00) Intro (03:15) Our Beef with Zach Bryan (08:29) Another Airplane Story (13:51) Blocking People (21:00) Carl’s Jr. (24:38) Willy Got Upgraded (27:33) Roadmap (29:06) Pitch Submissions (36:41) Rusty’s Stinky Locker (41:35) Pitches (Presented by Cash App) (54:12) Prank Calls (New Segment Alert!) (01:02:41) AITA (01:12:42) This Guy Rocks (01:17:31) Teach Me Something (01:21:06) YouTube Pranks that Don’t Exist (01:26:26) Our Favorite Drinking Games (01:31:55) Whose Personality are you Stealing? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

playdate episode 49 49 is it 49 yeah that's your guess will i you just because i was gone for a week doesn't mean you get to hijack the thing i'm gonna do an athlete oh this you were there when we did it the first time though yeah but like we didn't agree on it we did both we can both we can Do both. Okay. So now we have to guess a person that's 49? Yep. Jason Sudeikis.

49 would be Ashton Kutcher. Justin Timberlake. That's a good guess. Let's see it. All right. Jason Sudeikis. Show me 49. 48.

Oh. Did you Google it before? No, I don't, because I don't like this game. what was yours ashton kutcher ashton no mom it's 46 justin timberlake 43 oh a resounding win for me at your lame game uh now show me show me jason verrett who's that jason vr yep cornerback no not his age his number he wears two 22 wasn't even close uh damn it show me was tim wakefield 48 show me no oh show me show me show me uh yeah show me tim wakefield

Tim Wakefield, number... Oh, 49. Nice. All right. That's the first one we've gotten. Yeah, that was pretty good. Lauren, you got any guesses? Oh, Lauren's up and about.

She's up and about. She is on the go. It's good to be back in the studio. It's been a while. I took a hiatus. Yeah, how was that oil painting? The oil painting was thick. A lot of oil.

Can you, just for the people at home, tell us how you got trapped in it? Very, very, very big mistake. I thought I signed up for something on Eventbrite, and it was not what I thought it was going to be. I thought we were making the oil paintings. I didn't think we were going to be trapped. Yeah, it was a scam. But in all honesty, thank you guys for carrying the weight while I was gone, and shout out to Liam for stepping in. Some people missed you.

Yeah, it was unfortunate timing, but heaven gained a playmate. my my grandmother passed away uh in a less fun version of the oil painting thing yeah but uh her that was an abstract it was good to be yeah it was good to be home with family and stuff so it was so weird on the last episode people were commenting like who was they were seeing this random guy oh yeah did you see that i think it was my ghost i think it was the yeah it was your ghost i think it was my ghost being like it happened at four minutes then again at 46 i'm like what are you talking something was like the editing or something i don't know maybe or it was like a glitch and that was maybe like a glitch in the cameras yeah but anyway to pivot to another

one of my heroes that i won't be able to communicate with anymore uh we got our first beef as a podcast we have high profile beef breaking news to those grass fed grass fed uh zach brian blocked us on instagram you know they say they say you're not doing anything right until zach bryan blocks you they hate us because they aim us uh very confusing we don't really know uh what was going on well we know what happened which is that yeah i i was posting these like like parody songs or not even parodies just like joke songs on my instagram and it was about they were about like puberty like had nothing to do with zach bryan that being said the way i sing and play guitar does sound like zach bryan because he's like my hero yeah like i got a guitar because

of him i started learning music because of him first song i ever learned was leaving uh so yeah i sounded like zach bryan when i sing and so all the comments under the song where i was like talking about like my body looking weird were all like average zach bryan song yeah this is what zach bryan sounds like to me yeah and then i guess he found it stumbled across his fyp and took it very personally he went scorched earth in the comments he commented twice yeah what he commented very confusing comments yeah contradictory yep he got me oh here uh he commented can't play guitar but podcast w all the way yep and then he commented every white kid from the suburbs should podcast which first of all i'm from downtown lancaster pennsylvania

so keep the word suburb out of your white ass mouth second of all him calling me white in any context feels crazy yeah third of all his high profile girlfriend is a white kid from the suburbs who podcasts yeah that's true crazy insult i think what would probably happen was i think zach had probably had a couple drinks was was very mad that people were saying that your song sounded like you were making fun of him yeah and then the worst part is when he blocks you it blocks every account so like because he must have gone and then blocked playdate too yeah because he was also he was a follower of playdate followed playdate and he blocked it and he had engaged with our posts and stuff i know now all three of us are blocked on

all yeah that's what he probably he probably doesn't yeah like my like all of my accounts i feel like i was kind of staying out of it but uh i mean i i feel bad because now i dragged you guys in now you guys are all blocked by zach bryan too it is but it's just i was i i had not one part of me thought that it was would be interpreted as like a diss at him if in any way if anything i feel like you're so outspoken about being a big fan yeah it was crazy so will you go see him in person again you think i was thinking about so i've been on a um a boycott of his music which has been really hard because like all my playlists have music on it i mean he's been my number one artist for three years now uh so i've been on a boycott which has been fine uh that being said

the concerts thing is where i don't know where it would be it would be kind of like uh you know an eight mile when all you ever seen eight mile not really awesome of course learn you ever seen eight mile long time ago so eminem is uh he's coming up as like a battle rapper okay and during his battle raps the his rivals like are watching him in the crowd and i feel like if zach bryan looked down and he saw watching he would think that you're watching you're watching in like a malicious way yeah i mean i it's been such a like that's i think it's like been such a big part of my life for the last yeah i've seen him 10 11 times or something yeah we were thinking about what if we we got to scorch earth on him we become big luke bryan guys that's like our favorite yeah

we love luke we love luke bryan what's your favorite until we get an apology uh my favorite luke bryan country girl shake it for me girl i think it is is it didn't he on the bar that Morgan Wallen threw that chair off of? I think it was Eric Church's bar. Oh, buy dirt's good. Buy dirt. Wait, that's not him. Wait, click buy dirt. I don't think that's by him.

Oh, yeah. Yeah, first one. Country Girl. Country Girl. Loving every day. Yeah. I just can't believe it's just insane that he

You ever blocked anyone? No. I don't think I have either. I just can't believe he, like, can't, like... I've blocked a lot of people. To have someone that you've, like, revered suddenly, like, come into your orbit in that context is insane. What would my equivalent of that be? Like, my initial reaction was like, ooh, he knows me.

But then it's, like, crazy. Yeah, I can't even... That would be like Kobe posting a video. Nah, maybe you're not Kobe. That would be like... Yeah. probably like kobe i was thinking like it'd be like kobe was obsessed with michael jordan they'd beg if kobe posted his highlight tapes and everyone was like

like kind of looks like michael jordan yeah and michael jordan got fuck that guy yeah it was crazy also he told me i sucked the guitar so now i gotta prove him wrong i gotta learn it i gotta learn how to play an f i've learned how to bar my f's yeah all right who wants their weekly airplane story Oh, we got our WAP? Who wants their WAP? Ah, damn it. WOS.

Who wants their WOS? Oh, also, wait, wait, wait. I was thinking we could call our podcast WARP for short. Oh, yeah. It's the acronym, WARP. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Love it.

All right, who wants it? Hit me. I do. I do. I got Delta One on the way to New York, and the fun thing about Delta One is there is a special entrance. Okay. just for for delta one people got it you know we don't have to we don't have to rub elbows with

you know the middle class which i hate and uh i was you're the worst you're state and reincarnate okay keep going i was flying with my roommate ty and his little sister who uh unfortunately did not have delta one okay and so i was like you know what let's just go try can't can't can't hurt trying all three of us go through there and so i pulled up and i had my golf clubs and i had another bag that i was checking and i asked the guy like hey i don't really want to walk up there is there any chance i can just check my bags down here and he goes you're the man brother you're flying delta one you can do whatever you want and i go cool follow-up question i don't understand where did you check your bags i was like can you bring the can i just leave my bags here and he

where like at the special entrance because there wasn't a place to check this is just security and like a lounge okay and so he's like yeah man like you're the man you can do whatever you want i go it's awesome you say that uh can my two friends come with me through delta one and all the delta one people were like all the other delta people were kind of frustrated like the whole hierarchy thing was kind of crashing to the ground and they were gonna say no and then he stepped in he was like i just told you he was the man didn't i he's like can't make you look dumb in front of your friends now so we got to go in together went straight into the lounge wow had a couple glasses the champagne and they just got let in they got let in uh and then i sit down in my flight after

oh and ty ty was telling this guy like my friend is upset they when they were boarding he was telling his friend like my friend is obsessed with air airplane status and he gets to delta one today and they're walking by but i had my headphones on in my um in my hat down so i didn't see ty who was waving at me and pointing being like that's my buddy and i it looked like i was like big timing him big time he walked by that's awesome flash forward we take off it's a red eye everyone starts to recline to go to bed right and the lady's like who wants dinner and i don't get to fly it that often so i was like right here like well i'm gonna get the gonna get the full experience yeah i finished my dinner i go to recline seat is broken we'll not we'll not go

back so now it's all coming oh that is so beautiful that is beautifully poetic not even not even the slightest so it's like i am like as far up as possible people in like the main cabin are surely more comfortable than me and so to try and like keep me distracted while they fix the seat the lady's bringing me wine she's bringing me snacks and i'm getting wait they're fixing it on the airborne who's fixing just a guy they had a guy like a maintenance guy was on the flight it was like it was like flight attendants and then like just general like delta guy i don't know they were fixing it on the flight do you mean a male flight attendant in hindsight i think yeah i think that's might have might have been what he was and and uh so she's getting me like hammered while

they're fixing my seat and then they finally get it and i'm like all right like i'm feeling good now i'm gonna keep this party going uh and i'm watching movies i got my ipad on i look up to be like i should probably i should probably get a little bit of sleep before we land there's 45 minutes left in the flight i didn't get a wink of sleep on this red eye and now i have to drive to montauk oh jesus and you were drinking the whole time how long is the drive uh like three hours but we had to wait a little bit i had i had time waiting for the uh rental car to like kind of sober up and the oh this is another thing apparently if you're not 25 there's most of the cars you're not allowed to rent yeah and they charge you more no they just wouldn't let me they

wouldn't let me rent it and so i could only drive a minivan or a hyundai and why can't you say it like that hyundai hyundai hyundai no no that's a different company there's like there's like hyundai and there's like hyundai no dude bro has the worst sources yeah it was that one that's the only one what's the other h honda so it was a hyundai it's a hyundai hyundai and uh or hyundai I guess you're right. To get into a Hyundai, it was $1,600, and I couldn't get the car that I reserved. So I couldn't drive in style, and I was really sad about it. I'm sorry to hear that you went through that.

Yeah, play it. I guarantee it's Hyundai. It's Hyundai. It says it right there. Hyundai. I think it's broken or something. Wait, try Bing. Hyundai.

Wait, make it slower. Can you ask her to pronounce it right? Yeah, can you pronounce it? british hi and i okay so it's a little closer there's no british pronunciation no way the british say like that hi and i hi and i good i might i've got a high and i why would they say that wait can we go back really quick what would it require for you guys to block someone on instagram um maybe like they keep they keep like commenting something mean i'm just kind of surprise that you've ever girl maybe like my girlfriend like like slept with my dog i'd

probably like you'd have to be something like it would have to be you would block the girlfriend of the dog um no i i really don't i think it would be hard because i feel like i'm a big believer in like not that like i'm getting a lot of hate but like anytime there is like like it's if you engage with it that's just like playing into like what they yeah want i think if the guy who keeps commenting do slurs that don't exist keeps it up for another month i might block i was thinking i was thinking there could be like a tasteful way to approach that one if it's like a slur for someone who like never oh like like ties their shoes or something you know what i mean they never put the seat down yeah yeah yeah like you're a you're a cd yeah you're you're a seat head yeah

seat head seat face i don't know there could be something there but i i don't i don't think i would i don't i don't know what it would take to block i think it would be i think it would be it would have to be like affecting me day to day yeah like maybe i'm like scared for my own safety yeah i feel like yeah i don't know i had a i saw maybe one of the creepiest comments because you can mute people like if you just don't want to see them yeah you can do that i saw an in-person really creepy uh thing that someone said to me or said to another person i was driving in the uber and i had my window down and we were at a stoplight and there was this old man and his friend sitting on a park bench outside of an ice cream shop in montauk and uh this she max 17 years

old walked by and they wouldn't stop asking her about her tan lines who the old man yeah did you step in no but i said to my uber driver like that was pretty crazy right and he was like jesus uh what who are you blocked let's think i have blocked people in the past that are like like even if they didn't do something like personal it's like kind of in a personal way like if it's like triggering me or like an uncontrollable urge to like look them up even if i'm like muting them i'll block them like an ex-boyfriend um yeah maybe or like people that were like kind of related to like you're you're what you're doing it you're blocking them to for my to keep yourself from googling them that's strange because i had i found out recently that

i mean i just i feel like a lot of girls will i think it's more common for girls to like i will like hyper fixate on like things or like people if it's and if it's like triggering me or like just getting in the way of my every day then i'm like i might as well just make it but then aren't you worried that the boyfriend's like sister or whatever is like oh lauren's pretty crazy but i don't care because it's like just for me i'm like just doing it for my own sake like i don't really care what they think i had a recent thought where i was like one of my exes i was like wow she really like went off the grid huh and then no like i literally was like damn and i looked her up and it was like i don't know i guess she didn't block me because it showed up but it was like she like

removed me as a follower or whatever oh which i was a little like oh like we didn't end on bad terms i didn't really but yeah she's probably assuming that because it's like but that's what i was also thinking like in the line of work that we're in it's like like it's not like a normal like if you follow your ex and like once a year you see a dump from them it's like whatever but it's like i'm posting reels every week like that would be like annoying oh i see i could see in our particular context yeah like yeah i don't want to see them yeah i had i had a recent like my ex-girlfriend from last year blocked me on tiktok and but i would get you ever get emails and it's like see new post from like these people or whatever it she had followed like playdate or

something so like i was getting i was getting emails like check out this person's new tiktok so i was like oh i guess i haven't seen hers in a while god i went on i went to look her up on my personal and i was blocked that's what happened with me and jack bryan i could i could i actually can't well do you know how it happened was the a guy dm play date and was like damn zach bryan unfollowed yeah yeah yeah and i was like yeah we had like a pretty lengthy discussion about it we were all like why like lauren's like there's no way he blocked my photography well that's what i was like i was like guys i think because then i looked him up and i was like i dm the guy back and i was like uh no he just deleted his instagram because oh that's the other thing the day he

blocked us was the day that all the rumors came the dumois thing it was like a big in the news that they thought he had showed up drunk at Noah Khan's concert. Didn't he do that? No, it was all made up. He was like in Florida. But they like unfollowed each other. They never followed each other.

It was all made up. Oh, that's weird. Yeah, but... Why did they never follow each other? I don't know. They just hadn't... I guess Noah's really picky about who he follows, I guess.

He used to follow you. He still does. Let's go. That's got to hurt. It's got to sting. Got to sting for Zach a little bit. Guys, I actually... I had to block a previous playmate, I think,

because someone sent me a weird ass dm what'd they say i don't remember what it was there's something pervy so i blocked them what'd they say you got like pretty face no it was just like something weird pervy i don't weird dm well how weird was it it was like i'm like ew you're weird so i blocked him yeah that's fair but what did he say i don't remember i'm just like even if i remember i'm not gonna say it it was yeah so like those instances i'm like you don't deserve to look no that makes sense like get off my page yeah no no no no i wait what were we just saying though oh about um just the zach bryan like no oh oh there was the whole beef was like they blocked each other on instagram yeah and it was all false well then brie yeah posted a video about

but somehow like in the shut people up when they just follow each other maybe they do now i don't know they posted like a picture together like the next day so but why was noah being like we were supposed to have a special guest but that like i they they don't know for sure but i'm pretty sure it was hosier and that was the day that the microsoft stuff went down he would have had to fly from ireland oh because he brought up mount joy for northern attitude which means that was probably the they were the opener yeah my buddies were all there that was awesome that was sick uh but yeah i have a question for you guys we're hosier hosier which one is it i think it's hosier i thought it was hoser hosier it's hosier drives a

Hyonde. Hosea. Oh, Hosea. Hosea. Hosea? That says Hosea. That's British. Hosea.

Hosea. Yeah. Okay, that was British pronunciation that you can't pull up. Hosea. No, but the Google thing clearly can't be trusted if they can't get it right. No, that was the British one. Go back to American. Go back to American.

You're right. Hosea. Hosea. Hosea. Hosea. why is it carl's junior instead of carl jr i completely agree doesn't that make no sense yeah i i don't i don't know maybe the place is a junior maybe they're used like there used to be a carl's and they were like huge yeah and then they were like we need to make this way we need to make

this way more palatable okay i have a question this is a mandela effect thing for me um what's the fast food something in checkers like checkers and rallies is that one no one knows no one knows there's checkers and rally there's checkers and rallies they're identical brand also why is there a hardy's carl's jr and hardy's are the same thing but that doesn't make any sense well they just like they have all the same food it's the same restaurant it's just on the east coast it's called hardy's and on the west coast it's called carl's jr but why are there checkers and rallies it should be checkers or route if it's the same thing it's just that like the brands had already established themselves in their respective markets then they were bought by

parent company and so they like standardized like the menus and stuff but they didn't want to change the names to lose like the brand loyalty they developed i it should be checkers i'm pretty sure the last like three minutes like these conversations have you guys seen that tiktok where it's like how me my best friend like jump from a topic to topic like when we both have raging adhd and it's like the different like foods and like things like shape-shifting into other objects uh-uh do you know that sounds good couldn't know less about what you're talking someone's gonna know it's just i don't know i just think it's funny yeah you just talked about well we just be talking about things which is i'm i was with a lot i was

at this wedding on saturday which in it was a lot of it was a wedding from a childhood friend from lancaster pa yeah which i moved out of when i was 11 the hard streets yeah downtown that i grew up a city zach i'm looking at you that was that you don't know what that city was like the mean streets of lancaster yeah you don't know nothing about that uh no but it was like a lot of seeing people that i hadn't seen since i was like a really little kid like yeah a lot of whom i didn't even recognize but they were like oh i knew you when you were a little kid but then asking then then you have to do the whole charade of like i have a podcast yeah and then they're like what's it about and i'm like oh it's just i don't really know goofing goofing and hanging out and we do

stuffed it doesn't exist like that's the hardest one to like explain yeah yeah i had a uh speaking of people just talking oh what were you gonna say i'm sorry i just i just get crazy i've remembered a thing i want to talk about but it's kind of unrelated so if you want to go i just had a like it was probably how playmate playdate sounds to non-listeners was my uber driver talking to me on the way to the airport he didn't he spoke it was i couldn't tell if it was if it was english and a really thick French accent or if he was just speaking French to me. But you know when you can kind of tell

what they're talking about by like, you're like, okay, we're at this part in the story because his inflection is doing this and then like he would laugh and it would be like a killer joke, but I didn't get it. Yeah. And so we would be laughing about it,

but it was like, you're speaking French. Like in what, does he think that I speak French and I'm just responding? Are you sure it was French? It was damn near it. But you don't know at all what he was talking about. Like I got bits and pieces

Do you speak any French? A little bit Okay Huh No I don't speak it Then it wasn't No it was like I got bits and pieces

It was kind of like When you're like hearing A guy in Spanish And they're like They're telling a story But then random American words Show up in the middle Yeah

It was like Spanglish Franglish French I was like Okay I kind of get Where we're at Yeah yeah yeah I was going to say

That I forgot It's been so fucking long I've been like and try to remember stories for the pod for two and a half weeks now uh we were talking about the airplane shit i got my i i know everyone loves when we talk about airplanes uh i got my first ever first class up upgrade when i was i was in waco texas for my grandma's funeral and i was flying back and two days before my flight i got first class upgrade i was so stoked and i was gonna be on the plane with my mom dad brother sister uncle so i was seat 1a so i was gonna

be sitting there while they all walked by and i was gonna i was gonna look up and i was just gonna like shake my head you're like making out i was a flight attendant yeah i was gonna i was gonna order a glass of champagne immediately just so i had it anyway i ended up getting canceled then i get another upgrade for my flight yesterday back from philadelphia to first class it was to comfort plus but it was you don't which which i don't care about you don't care about and you don't think it's a real thing i think it's a real thing i think it's it wouldn't have mattered for this But it was just like I had never gotten an upgrade, and then I got two back-to-back.

Both flights got canceled. So I ended up never getting an upgrade. So I'm still... What you'll start to notice now that you're getting a little status, Will, is any city that's not one of the major five, you get first class. Yeah. There aren't a lot of big hitters in Waco. Yeah.

It was out of Dallas, but Dallas isn't big for Delta. I think it's an American hub. Okay. I think it's like LA, New York, Atlanta are the bad ones. Yeah. Billy got first class on the way back from Atlanta. Really? Yeah.

He has better status than you? No, I think he paid for it. That checks out. Should we RM it up? Yeah. I think I had like one other knockout story, but maybe I didn't. Griddent. Is there a guy named Griddent?

That's not anyone we know, right? guys this episode of playdate is brought to you by chubbies i've personally been wearing a lot of their original stretch shorts i just liked it as the built-in underwear sometimes i'll be like going to put on my shorts and i'm out of boxers and it's kind of a nightmare you're going no boxers with them with chubbies you don't have to worry about it they're built in so comfortable the linen uh swim trunks i was wearing i was at the beach all last week in maine yeah awesome guys we all know the saying look good feel good and that is exactly what i do and what you should do with chubbies i'm telling you these things they turn heads they make eyes pop out of like

eye sockets like a cartoonish thing when people see me wearing them i saw a guy's tongue roll out like a like a magic carpet yes yes i was there yes for a limited time our friends at chubbies are giving our listeners 20 off with the code playdate20 at checkout at chubbieshorts.com that's 20 off your order with the promo code playdate20 support our show and tell them we sent you embrace the freedom to move the confidence to shine and style to stand out with chubbies let's get back into the episode all right road map guys or do you want us to wait mobsters doing the hokey pokey oh yeah tell learn this is killing i was standing all right sorry that was rude boys here's the plan we get there i'll get make sure we're in the right spot i'm gonna put my right

foot in all right put your right foot out do the hokey pokey and then we're out of there all right gonna want any funny business that was my character and scene guys we have big news today i'm red hot we are announcing a new segment the podcast oh my god i forgot about the segment the podcast is getting longer uh we're gonna start today with pitches from you guys then we're gonna hear will and i's pitches presented by cash app it pays to get paid on cash app then lauren do we have some am i the assholes we do lovely how many dos any of them callers i don't think so because why don't we front load our new segment that's okay that's why i was saying like before am i the asshole drum roll please after pitches after pitches we are going to do our new segment you

guys may have submitted some of your friends phone numbers and a little bit about them and we are going to prank call two of them today we're very excited then we have am i the asshole followed by this guy rocks followed by teach me something and then will and i are gonna do youtube pranks that we think people should do and drinking games that do not exist it's gonna be epic it's gonna be a jam-packed episode lauren let's hear i love the road map okay here we go pinches dearest lauren rusty and sir william i have a pitch for y'all knighted why are you why are you knighted and i'm not because i know how british pronunciations work i have a pitch for y'all that i think could be game changing we've all been in the position where we have to help our dad fix something on

the car personally i just helped my dad replace the muffler on his car and i couldn't stop thinking about how badly i wish i had a little guy about a foot tall who could fit in the small cracks and crevices of the underside of the car it's always little guys this little guy has strength like no other and can unscrew bolts with no problem he can be hired from his website with ease and is always willing to help with your car fixing needs. Hope you guys like the pitch. Excited to see more representation for one-foot guys on the pod.

Yeah. I have a qualm. Where do you keep him? Where do you put him at night? Because he's so strong he can break out. He's so strong and also like, is he sentient? She just said he can unscrew bolts like no other. So it's like, you'd have to build some sort

of just welded cage for him. He's not evil. He's not gonna like what dude he's not gonna do something he's not evil he's not gonna do something insane yeah but like i we can't what wait how what how do you know he's not gonna do anything insane well on my wild card my guy wouldn't what if your guy's a wild card does he sleep he sleeps in your bed like he sleeps at the foot of your bed like a dog yeah i guess i mean what does he wear what do you get i'm worried i'd like kick him in the middle of the night instead of flying a hundred feet

how tall he's one inch tall one foot oh oh that's totally different than when i was Yeah, it's just big enough that we have to, like, acknowledge him, but not... Yeah, yeah. It's kind of a weird... I like it. Some babies are one foot tall, probably, right? Probably never, actually. I think they skip it.

All right. So do you want him or not? I'm scared of him. I just... We guys... It's always little guys with these people. It's all half the pictures are just a little guy that does X. Yeah, but...

I like it. I want bigger guys. She wanted to pitch the mechanic. Yeah, no. I want a regular guy who's good at fixing cars. Yeah, and he does, like, pistons. Also, do cars still have mufflers? In my head, that's, like, an old-timey thing.

I think it... I thought... Yeah. I think if they didn't have mufflers, they would be, like, incredibly loud. Can you look up when, like, new mufflers? Mufflers are what makes it not go like. That's strange.

In my head, that was only on, like, Model Ts. No, I think they're big. Remember we went to Muffler, Wisconsin? We went to a place called Muffler? No, Mifflin. Uh-oh. My little brother in my fraternity was named Muffler. Isn't there a guy named Muffler?

Yeah, that's who it was. No, like online? what probably somewhere guy named muffler google it guy named muffler there we go oh yeah yeah the muffler man long live the muffler man he hates it when you confuse him with the muffin man too they do very do you know the muffler man the muffler man the muffler man on the left looks like will and i me and me after one course banquet i mean that's us wait make that the thumbnail that's after taking like delta seven you turn into those guys i'm scared about which one i am um i know just don't say it i don't like his cheeks i think you know exactly which one you

are just because i can't grow facial hair yeah that is kind of a cheat code i get to always be the guy with the beard yeah all right let's see who is this guy this looks horrible i don't know Why are they detached from their... Wait, and look at their hands. Oh, what the fuck? All right. Angry video game nerd. All right, next.

Next pitch. Jesus, that was a nightmare for some reason. Yeah, that was a disaster. That last 45 seconds was an absolute shit show. Okay. Hey, Lauren, long time bitch, first time pitch. Hell yeah. Someone has already said this, but...

Oh. Yo, what's good, sea puppies? Y'all know what the worst part about general hygiene is? well having i'm hung up on sea puppies yeah we're sea dogs see okay what's the worst part about personal hygiene is you gotta like you have to do it every day like you can't keep keeping up with it you can't take a day off clipping your nails it's just straight up not fun plus they shoot halfway across the room and so hard to find the clippings i agree i present to you the nail nibbler this is a robot you put your hand in and it will perfectly cut all your

nails at once and we'll collect we'll collect all the droppings saving time and keeping the place cleaner i mean i i don't need it um i they called me the nail nibbler in high school yeah um i think it would be like my my worst part is sometimes i'm just not confident like i'll feel like i put it too deep and i'm worried that i'm gonna like i'm i'm skittish with nails but uh i think that would be funny you could do it while you're you could just have it on the side of your uh counter and like when you're pooping you just have your left hand in i like the idea that it's like a face yeah that wasn't a bit at all

oh my god I just shot a booger out as well booger oh you know I'm gonna really air out my sister's dirty laundry here Laura I'm sorry

I think she listens but when she was a kid at some point it was discovered that she had been collecting all of her toe cheese in

like you know what I'm talking about like like the dead skin on the bottom of your feet oh I love dude I had one the other day not to interrupt your story

I got home and I was scratching my foot and like it felt so good that like I like kind of like rolled over into a position and like if someone like watched it

I was like I was like oh oh but like you know like the skin that like comes off it's like when you're

cleaning your I feel like I don't really get it anymore I have it just between my pinky toe and my ring toe it could be athlete's foot maybe

wait that Oh, you mean the stuff on your skin or on your nails? Skin. What are you talking about? Do you have cheese on your nails? No, maybe I'm just thinking about when you get pedicures and they clean out your cuticles. No, I'm talking about dead skin on the bottom of your foot that you would peel off. How did she get caught?

I don't know. It sounds like the perfect crime. Yeah, I know. It was like a drawer. If someone opened it and found it, she'd been collecting it for years. What? What would she do? How old was she?

I don't know. I don't know. How old was she? I don't know. I mean, she's nine years older than me. Lauren, Lauren, Lauren, do not go to images of toe cheese. Okay, this looks like that isn't what it's actually called. Yeah, definitely not toe cheese.

She was picking out the dead skin on her foot. Look up dead skin on foot. Well, do we know what it is? Why can't I look up toe cheese? We don't need to Google it. Well, go to images. See what toe cheese looks like. Yeah, it's not that bad.

Oh, that's pretty bad. All right. They see the one with the sandals that looks like cheese? What was the punishment? I don't know. I actually have no idea I don't think I would punish my kid for doing that We'd have to have a serious talking

Yeah They also found out one time she had all her homework I think was just all under her bed It was like a very like classic Like crime Dude oh yeah that reminds me When I was in 5th grade My dad used to pack me a bagged lunch

Classic like Sandwich and some other snacks in there And one day I didn't eat my sandwich And I felt bad like throwing it out for some reason and so i put it in uh just the locker below mine and uh jones what wasn't davy jones the locker below you i put it in the locker below me and then it had gotten to the point where so much mold had grown on it that i was too scared to take it the five feet from the locker to the trash can like for fear of being seen with it but if you opened like my locker

or like any of the lockers around it like it had polluted all the air in there so everyone was just like oh my god like this egg it smells so bad over here and we'd have to like yeah did you use your locker we didn't really like we never ours were like a joke like we got assigned one and then you just never i would keep stuff in i would keep like textbooks in there that i knew i wasn't gonna bring home yeah but then this locker became my place where i would put things that i was ashamed of like it was like so like we were playing ruler stick hockey with the yard sticks they like fling tape around and i snapped one in half instead of just like throwing it out or like owning up to it i put it in the locker and so this locker became like it was like a contraband

yeah it was like it was like all the stuff that i in my head if i got caught with this thing i was doing like seven years in prison and on the last day we had to clean out uh all of our lockers and i like made a it literally felt like a heist like getting it from there to the trash can uh without anyone seeing me i never got oh it sounds so grody yeah one time i was in freshman year of college and i was hanging out and i were like in the hallway of my freshman dorm and like like hit one of that you know those like ceiling tiles that you can like punch out like squares of like hit one up and a fucking like a gallon of milk came down that was like could we had no time frame on how long i had been in there it was terrifying no no it was we just like freaked out

and put in the trash can and ran away but it reeked it was awesome oh college was awesome it's the the the thing of her getting caught or like her finding they're them finding all of her homework under her bed like getting caught with your tail between or uh what is it getting caught with your hand in a cookie jar a little bit like yeah when we were in uh elementary school there was like this thing called ala cart and you could get like snacks and like rice krispie treats and stuff like that and we would just grab them we'd walk in one way grab one and then just walk out the other way so like you didn't have to pay for it and then a teacher saw us one day and i think she had been like you know she's on to you she'd been sniffing it out for like weeks that we had

been doing this and uh she came to the um table that we were all at and everyone just put through it all under the ground so there was like cases of like various treats under the thing and i got sent to the assistant principal's office and uh he was like i'm not gonna tell your dad but like you got you guys gotta stop he's like you can't do that let's not and we had to go apologize to the lunch lady it was really awkward i didn't like it that's unfortunate i'm sorry you had to deal with that yeah i used to throw forks in the ceiling that's cool i would tell you about this in high school we had like a senior lounge it was just like a cool room that only seniors are going and i found out like if you took like a metal fork and just went like it would go and stick

right in the ceiling and i like started the biggest trend of the year there we go and no one knew about it and then once they found out about it they were like do you realize how much of a fucking issue this is you were like a bunch up there still the holes just the holes oh because they would stick in there for like eight hours then they drop which is also like super dangerous probably they're just forks we could fall but yeah i remember the assistant principal she was like you're graduating and i really don't want to like ruin anything but like i hope you know this is like thousands of dollars in damage you like ruin this whole ceiling and i was like our our middle school lunch there was a big rivalry between like the football team and then

like just the uh like other like generally the nerds no like it wasn't it wasn't like nerds and jocks it was just like generally pretty cool kids and then like this also cool kids but they were on the football team or whatever and uh we would pot we would shoot like you could once you finished your milk carton there was a way to like smash it and if you folded it in a certain way it would like pop really loud okay we would like do that to each other and like pop bags and stuff and someone did one to this kid named jack tower and he had a lisp and he walked over and he goes this means war that's intense oh all right should we hit another pitch i already did two playmates oh uh should we prank it up no we gotta do our pitches oh sponsored by cash app presented

by cash app it pays to get paid on cash app and will let's get into it if i like your pitch i'm gonna cash up you a dollar all right here it is ready the velcro towel hear me out yeah sometimes when you're the towel like you you dry down and then you wrap yourself and you walk out in your apartment and you don't want your ding dong to fall out because your roommate's there of course and you like do like the tuck thing yep but then like you're a tuck i'm a fold oh i think i'm a tuck i wrap i wrap wrap myself real tight and then you fold it all around like a waistband oh yeah no it locks itself sounds like a better strategy it's it's never come loose interesting i could run a marathon in it well maybe well that ruins my velcro towel idea

you can't fold them good um but sometimes it's i think the awkward part is like when i'm putting of like my underwear on sometimes it falls off yep and there's like a split second and like my room is very visible to the public too all my windows are walls are windows so the velcro towels got velcro on one side one side's a towel the other side's all velcro and so you can just stick it i picture you like you missed you missed your oh you get out of the shower to like floss between your balls or something it's the velcro side you like rip your balls off balls well why are you what you think there's like blood blood dripping out you're like oh do you guys see that new jake jill and all movie no or tv show what is it presumed innocent no on apple tv plus how about

the manchurian candidate have you ever seen that no as a movie i watched last are you just trying to start looking for things that we haven't seen so that it seems no these are just the last two things i saw and i was watching spirited away yesterday i can't do that i've never seen it before so scary really i used to be terrified as a kid when their parents turn into animals imagine show that to a six-year-old i didn't finish it yet that's the first scene yeah well it's the first like 20 minutes but i'm only like 45 minutes in so you have you've already seen that part yeah oh i passed that okay cool yeah so i'll cut towel you in or you out i'm in or maybe it's some proprietary technology where it's like both

sides are velcro to each other but they're still soft for drying why isn't there just a little tab of velcro on one corner because then you have to get the corner right every time i guess okay i don't know uh maybe glue maybe just get a bottle of elmer's glue next to you glue it every time i like that too uh will you almost got to sit first class yeah it was sick lauren do you like sitting first class first class will vacation first class we'll take you in your fall these days um and this is my pitch it's called seat trade once everyone's checked into their flight a stock mark stock stock stock mark a stock mart whoa a what am i thinking stock market stock market holy shit a stock market like wait what that was you were saying stock mark and you

couldn't think of stock market yeah that was weird stock market's down today by the way i know we checked will goes you know the stock market's down i checked my thing i've lost twelve hundred today oh yeah so what what the stock market's down the stock market's down unfortunate it's probably because of the episode with liam the episode i wasn't in tank the market how does that work like why don't they some guy had a good bit where he was like you know they turn the stock market off every night and then they turn it back on in the morning it's like we're in a bubble it's about a crash yeah leave it off like well they can't leave it off if it's about to crash why wouldn't they just turn it off i wish i knew enough about this that that's that there's no

way that well people wouldn't be able to keep trading but like if if that was something that could exist then people wouldn't participate in it i feel like yeah agreed agreed um so a stock market like interface shows up uh everyone's seats are like their own individual thing and you can list yours for sale and like trade yours so you're like you can get a fair deal on a first class seat depending on how bad that guy wants to stay up there i was thinking about that today i almost today like i got on my flight this morning i had an aisle seat and i guess i know a lot of people like like an aisle more than a window i was in the mindset of like i would love to just pass out on this flight yeah so i i was sitting in the aisle first the lady came down and

almost was like hey have to ask any chance you'd want to swap no pressure would that be weird no that wouldn't be weird i think it's more like i'd be like any shot you'd want you'd prefer the aisle because i'd be happy i don't think it's weird to ask but then you some people are awkward and would feel pressured into saying yes even though that's what i and also then if i had to pee at any point i would feel horrible yeah did i ever tell you about the guy that fucking uh showed up to the plane late and took the window so i'm sitting i'm sitting in the aisle there's a guy around our edge sitting in the middle okay and boarding is like ending so we're giving each other that look like oh my god we might pull this off we might pull this off like you might be able to

sit in the window the guy shows up he's the last guy on the plane like sprinted here takes the window obviously that's his seat whatever and he goes hey uh is there any chance is there any chance we could swap but it's like a six hour flight and i hate being the guy that because i get up like multiple times and so i was like nope sorry like i you know i like the aisle whatever yeah he goes oh it's real shame because like i'm gonna be going to the bathroom like six or seven times on this flight and me and the guy in the middle are looking at each other like if it's that if you have like crones or something like i feel like that's on you to like book the aisle like you book the window whatever and so i'm like okay that's weird but kind of

forget about it and then the snack lady comes around he buys three chicken salad sandwiches in two bistro boxes and eats all of them and then gets up like multiple times to go to the bathroom and so me and the guy in the middle were looking at each other like we obviously couldn't talk about it but i would assume we were both thinking like he brought three sandwiches and two bistro boxes and ate them all in like an hour and we were like you have to go to the bathroom because you just ate for six like that's not you don't have like a medical condition wait that's crazy i didn't tell you the story yeah insanity it was like also like a crazy thing to be like all right well i'm gonna go bathroom a hundred times so fuck you asshole i think the conclusion i came to is

like there must be some medical condition where like he if he doesn't eat he's gonna have like diarrhea and so he's trying to like front load it with like food that will make it like you should have you should have been like well just as a heads up i'm gonna be looking out the window a hundred times there's a bunch of stuff i want to see isn't that strange yeah that is true why would is have you guys ever heard of the condition where you would need he wasn't a big guy where you need a sandwich you need you need three chicken salad sandwiches and two bistro bucks no not pretty i mean the chicken salad sandwich is pretty healthy but the bistro boxes are like candy and like cheat cheese and yeah there's no way that i mean i guess it would clog you up yeah i got free

breakfast on my flight today really in seat row 20 it was american though yeah sometimes they do i the they sometimes they have too much food in first class and they will give it to people okay all right no this happened to me this wasn't residual food this was for me did everyone get it yeah that's so strange they came through it was a jfk to lax this morning they came through and they gave you like a proper guy like woke me up and he was like these are the three options what would you like one was like mine was like the one i ended up getting was like a bagel with granola and yogurt and oh that's awesome cream cheese and i well but initially i was like oh no i'm good and he was like it's free and i was like oh okay i want it then yeah i had one where they

they were out of sandwiches when i asked and so i went up and got like a bunch of croissants and gave them to me like from first class like oh like you wanted to buy one no he like felt bad they didn't have what i wanted but you were gonna buy it i was gonna buy it yeah he was like he was like i'll you know i'll figure it out i'll hook you up that's nice um wait i have a pitch oh let's go so this kind of came into fruition in boston with my siblings i was boston by the way it was very fun happy birthday thank you i haven't seen you since you turned 25 25 i'm joking what are you fucking with you bro i'm fucking with you she's the only first one she's the oldest i can't wait for my birthday yeah you're like a month away i'm just really excited to move kind of

insensitive to be excited for your birthday i know will's born on 9 11 all right okay all right well at least i wasn't born in fucking maine asshole i love maine okay so here's here's my pitch ready planes do you ever wish you had a napkin to wipe your grimy hands after a big juicy burger or barbecue wings but you don't you don't yeah have one like you just saw one on you and the moment you don't have one those are all crumbled not allowed to maybe already yeah so i introduced you the pocket dispenser it's like a wet wipe style attachment that you can like slide into your pockets okay so if you're eating what was i eating something i was eating tacos my hands are getting all crazy messy yeah and i wanted to just like have continuous napkins coming out of

my pocket but i don't have that so you can just put the little insert in and then replace it every time it runs out but it just slides right into your pockets and you never run out i love it now correct me if i'm wrong was you the only other pitch you've done also about eating chicken wings no no no no my other pitch was about um wasn't it like two little things you have on your fingers oh okay okay okay no mine was oh did you have finger napkins yeah they were like for eating chicken wings it was like gloves yeah little gloves for you but i do like what if the pocket itself is like that's kind of what i was also thinking because griffin jane's boyfriend griffin yeah was oh you hate him he he took it made me think of it because he was taking napkins out

of his pocket and he like pulled his pocket out and i thought that here's the here's the where were you eating also why is that you go to dorchester yeah cisco cisco are you into cisco brewing yeah did you go to dorchester no that was the greatest prank of all time uh yeah it was killer the uh was he not just getting sauce all over his pants no he had napkins in them no yeah yeah i know but i'm saying how did he get into his pockets he had sauce over his no they were for me he was giving them to me because i had the messy finger why is this freak carrying around so many napkins no he put them in his pocket from the napkin store well it's at cisco it makes sense because it's like there's a station you grab it all at oh yeah yeah i get it i get it so that's

the pocket dispenser all right should we do our first prank call yeah what was your favorite thing in boston oh sorry um loved walking around beacon hill it's very cute and just like fenway bars were fun loretta's is that the one on the way right it's one on the corner it's country yeah they do like live music yeah yes that's fine that's home so much fun okay guys let's take a minute to talk about cash app you probably know cash app as the place to send people money like when you need to settle up with your buddies after a night out on the town well we are here to tell you that cash app actually has a lot more to offer don't overlook cash app like you were overlooked back in high school cash app is the place for a faster simpler way to manage your money you can start saving with

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New segment. so we put a thing on our instagram story that was like send us your friend's phone number and like a story about them um so we can prank call them we got a bunch so thank you all this was my personal favorite that i'm very excited about it's so good nell cummings sent us a message said my mom built a big fence in her yard to block neighbors from seeing her in the pool slash hot tub she is so worried the fence breaks county law on fence height and is paranoid she's gonna get a call saying she has to take it down or pay a fine which by the way all of these were like like i don't know like

my buddy did like something crazy while drunk and this to me was like oh this is so fucking funny wait do we know what county it is because we have to madison county i asked i got all the details okay two five six there you go madison county alabama i believe five six well yeah is that real yeah god damn um all right god damn what there was like a you google it in the first picture is a rocket ship it's uh yeah that's where the rocket ships are made so i have i got the google voice app we see use this in my campaign days to do uh it's actually fucked up but like when we would call people to get them to vote we would make it look like we were like from there that's what i was like i'd be like in south carolina calling georgia voters but i would make it look

like i was okay so do you want to take the reins on this one really oh what oh yeah yeah i do i'll do this one and then you'll do the next one perfect i'm so excited about this i think this i think the fence one is the funniest thing okay i'm like nervous i don't know when was last pc eat it the last prank call i did it's been a minute remember when you were trying to do one here yeah what we did one on this thing right we ended up cutting it or rusty called a chinese restaurant you were trying to call girls oh yeah no one picked nobody no of our girlfriends picked up do you want to practice at all hi there susan hi is this susan hi susan uh my name is crunt okay i gotta pick a better name than crunt uh my name is michael i'm with the

madison county public works department just make one up residential inspection department well i'm with the residential inspection department that sounds insane residential inspection wait what wait can you google oh no you can just say it from the city planner's office the city planners but i don't think that's it either i'm with the with the county can i just say i'm with the county no because you need to call you need to throw you google madison also am i keeping this in as part parts of it i don't know yeah permitting division of the building department yeah that sounds like i would be shaking i'll be shitting my pants if i gotta call from them i'm with the permitting division of the building department uh

okay all right the permitting division of just just just highlight the the place that he's from oh it literally has the heights that's so funny yeah wait so will how high how high can it be how high can the fence be no fence that will obstruct vision between a height of two and six feet above so it's too tall it's too damn tall your neighbors are calling and they say they want to see you swimming and you made the defense so call wait what do i say though what's like the End game. What's the end game? It's like, I'm going to...

So you'll come around later today. We're going to send a prospector out with a file to file her... We're going to have to come measure it. Maybe we just have to say we have to come measure it. No, no, wait. We have to come... Shave it down. We have to come grind it down a couple inches.

Oh, we're going to have to cut a few inches off the top. Yeah. Hi, Susan. This is Mark Depot. Hi there. No, I'm not going to say a last name. I'm going to say, hi, Susan. My name is Michael.

I'm with the building permit. You have to have last names. I'm with the permitting. No, I don't. Come on. They would not say. If you're cold calling someone like that, you would just say, hey, I'm Michael. Okay.

Hi, Susan. I'm Michael. I'm with the permitting division of the building department here in Madison County. I'm so excited. Oh, my God. I'm so nervous. I don't know if she answers. Okay.

This family is on the brink of civil war. Mobland, the hit original series, is now streaming on Paramount+. We are the Honeigans. Don't know the net? Then Google us. From the underworld of Guy Ritchie. Do you want to step up the ladder? I want Cormac dead.

Starring Tom Hardy, Pierce Brosnan, and Helen Mirren. Do I have to do everything myself? You want more? I'll give you more! Mobland. New season is now streaming on Paramount+. No. thank you for calling please leave a message please speak clearly your voicemail is being transcribed by email hi there uh i'm calling for susan my name is michael uh i'm with the permitting division of the building department here in madison county uh i'm calling because

we had some reports uh that you installed a fence recently that doesn't meet uh county standards in terms of height uh so we're gonna have to send someone out in the next couple of weeks and uh oh yeah it is i'm gonna call back call from to accept press one hi there is this susan hi susan uh my name is michael i'm calling with the permitting division of the building department here in madison county uh we had received some calls about did you recently uh install a fence

in your yard uh-huh so we've we've had some uh complaints about the height of the fence so we might need to send someone out there just to just to check on that um do you know if it if it was built uh up to county standards in terms of height i don't know okay all right well we're gonna have to send someone out we might have to take a few inches off the top if it's too tall okay all right okay all right uh we'll send someone by this week i appreciate it ma'am okay bye-bye take care wait she barely like said anything we're gonna have to take a few inches off the top oh she sounds so sweet she's like okay all right oh that sounds fair oh my god we're gonna have to take i didn't know what else to say she was just so like okay yeah not even questioning it because she

probably like knows that it's no that was someone who who is genuinely gonna go outside with a mallet and try and shorten it a couple inches oh my god so she's gonna tell her daughter i don't know what else to say now or what else like i didn't know what else like i was like yeah okay all right well that was that was the dumbest prank of all time you got her ass i got her the worst part is like now she's probably canceling the rest of her day i think someone's gonna come to her uh that was great you tell her that we were calling her yeah i want her like daughter to yeah tell her soon yeah okay what's the next prank call that one was funny you just let her go she responded oh my god what did she say she said i'm just gonna call her and say

what's up and see what she says yeah i asked if there's a way she could record it oh my god all right oh sweet woman unfortunately that that is the end of our new segment we got a good one though we got a good one uh we didn't tell her it was a prank my parents car this is a crazy last last september was my mom's 60th birthday we had a big blowout we had like lobsters and clams and all sorts of seafoods and stuff and uh afterwards they loaded all like the seafood bits that were left over like into like a big trash can or whatever and didn't end up taking it out until the next day and when they loaded in my trunk we're driving to the dump and when they got to the dump we're taking it out it my dad knocked it over and it

spilled seafood day old like rotting seafood guts all over the trunk of their bmw and so they tried to clean it out scrubbed it just reeked reeked reeked they ended up taking the place they had to get the whole back seat like replaced like all the upholstery and the and the literal seats and stuff and it still smells like seafood when you get in the car they replaced everything on the interior it was it's like you total it it like would have been total now they've just like it smells like seafood for the first few seconds you roll the windows down start driving and then you're fine yeah but yeah isn't that insane they almost totaled their car with seafood like i didn't even i didn't know that you could total your car that way

all right should we do some am i the assholes oh yeah yeah this is from mickey he says hey lauren and the swashbucklers this really isn't an am i the asshole but i need advice i got blackout drunk a few weeks ago called the girl i've had a crush on for six years and i'm pretty sure i told her i loved her i passed out in somebody's lawn and was woken up by the cops who then took me home wait sorry can you start over i got distracted yeah i got blackout drunk a few weeks ago called the girl i've had a crush on for six years and i'm pretty sure i told her i loved her yep i passed out in somebody's lawn and was woken up by the cops who then took me home i texted her and said sorry for calling at 3 a.m last night she

said it's no problem but things haven't felt the same between us since is there anything i can do to fix this love you guys to pluto and back yeah that's a bummer we've all done it unfortunately um by her strudel is she that could that could be taken a whole different way if you buy her strudel if you give a girl a strudel she's gonna want some milk and then that yeah you just have all sorts of problems you're right i think uh so i'm assuming they were probably pretty good friends because like if they've known her for six years yeah um what what would you do will pretend like it didn't happen no i think you uh i think that you you address it and you say listen uh i'm sorry for making uh putting us in an uncomfortable position that wasn't my intention

uh and then maybe you know maybe maybe you can turn maybe things don't feel the same because she feels this maybe maybe she feels the same way and she's nervous about how she feels and uh yeah maybe now that she knows that that's on the table it's hard to act like you guys are just friends i agree so maybe so i would you know you do you talk to one of her friends and find out what you said yeah you have to get to the bottom of what you said you almost surely like what if you didn't because i think i think the big thing to remember is that whatever you're perceiving is like a shift in the way she's acting 95 of that is just your own anxiety about what you do yeah she's probably acting pretty much normal and you're just like i know i'm i'm i've i'm really

bad about doing that sometimes i'm like ever since i did that thing that i find out later they actually didn't care about or think about they've been doing x and it turns out it was just like my own brain like inventing yeah what if he's worried that like the worst case scenario was that he said he loved her but he actually said like he came out as like a like you know nazi sympathizer or something like he he said something way worse yeah i mean that would be the worst case scenario yeah definitely want to find that out i would i would text one of her friends and be like hey do you have any clue what i got up to the other night yeah and then uh and then if it's that you love her do you love her does he love her yeah does he love her i i mean if he said it yeah you know

you should you should this has had a crush on her for six years oh okay yeah you should start start dating one of her friends and then that'll make it not weird yeah yeah or maybe buy her a strudel all right next lauren okay lauren the pastry uh pirate what the why bet you did bet you rolled out of bed not thinking you were going to get called a pastry pirate pastry pirate you didn't like my strudel no it's fine if someone got you strudel wouldn't that be nice yeah what even what is i don't know you just let's move on so oh i would be happy i'd be like oh that's sweet they thought of me okay next am i the asshole what what is that face i just didn't know we the confectionery cops over here he's like a one-two punch from you two the uh

the delight dea okay should i do the next one sure i don't give a fuck anymore all right this is from jayden jayden jayden hello lauren and the regulators nice what does that mean it's good it's a compliment is it really yeah we're the regular let's go i have an am i the submission when i was a junior in college i had a friend let's call him terry who was graduating college and getting married within a couple months time span i was slated to be in this wedding as a groomsman and was also going to attend the graduation because this was one of my best friends for all of college but then because of misunderstanding me and the other

friends i mean my other friends were under the impression that we couldn't attend graduation because we weren't invited by this friend so we made other plans for graduation night when terry found out about this he was pretty pissed because he expected us to be at his graduation he got all angry and started cussing me out as we exchanged some words over text honestly it was pretty messy i went to a group chat with our other friends to tell them that terry was pretty upset with us the next thing you know we're getting or we're joking about me getting kicked out of the wedding party i then made a pretty rude in retrospect comment about two things one the groomsman attire and to the catering i want to preface in the group chat or did wait wait i i feel like

maybe sorry wait is it was graduation and a wedding at the same time no it was like they're like they're just in a couple times yeah so the graduation and then the wedding was in like a couple months after got it so this is this person's getting married yeah it's like yeah um i want to preface that these were met as jokes and were set in the heat of the moment as i was very frustrated with terry for not understanding what we thought was it to terry though i don't know i think it's probably in the group chat that he's in yeah damn no no no to the group chat that terry's not in okay but well they were just talking shit oh yeah yeah because then it says well someone in this group chat was friends with terry's fiancee she goes to the fiancee and

tells her what i said i'm assuming without the context that i was frustrated and didn't really mean what i said terry and his fiancee get upset over the jokes i made and i get kicked out of the wedding party in addition my other two friends who were going to be groomsmen in the wedding got kicked out as well oh my god one of them only reacted with the laughing emoji to what i said and the other was just present in the group chat basically am i the asshole for reacting how i did and therefore getting my other friends kicked out of the wedding party as well what did he say he said that he said he didn't like that he said the groomsman attire was like probably stupid yeah then the catering was it like clever at all it doesn't say the jokes just about the tire and

the catering okay i think you you know you got caught up in the heat of the moment and you let a couple jokes fly that maybe you should have kept to yourself but it feels like this is an overreaction if they're kicking out the guy who was just there and everyone and my question is like if he's if he's willing to part with that friendship so quickly you know maybe what could be pressure from the from the it's probably the i was gonna say the the bride the fiance she's probably the one that picked out the attire and the catering so it's offending her deeply i'm sure the friend well what i think is like it sounds like the graduation thing was a miscommunication yeah so how did it escalate to this point i think terry was probably pretty stressed out

But I'm not letting Jaden off the hook. Oh, you think Jaden... I think he should have been like, oh, my God, I'm so sorry we didn't realize that we were invited to the graduation. Yeah. We'll make it happen. You know what I mean? Kind of thing. It sounds like he immediately escalated it into a fight, though.

Yeah. That's a good point. And I'm also, there's two people, there's a lot of people at fault here. Who's the snitch? the friend of the fiancee which which is presumably also one of the oh because he's a groomsman because yeah yeah the wedding i went to yesterday or two days ago was actually cool where they did like oh sorry it was just like they're like uh i forget how they worded it but it was like guys and girls for each but each one was like specific to like

that person's like crew like it wasn't like all the guys on one side all the girls on one side oh so it was like his boys and girls on one side yeah and well they were both girls so i guess that also factored into it yeah i mean that makes a lot easier for them but i still think that would be a cool way in general like i always think it's weird it's like my sister will be over yeah with all of my fiance's friends like that you know what i mean i kind of would rather like have my brother and sister right with me your people and then yeah yeah like i kind of yeah did you see that tiktok of that wedding that did the groom had a best woman and the bride had the best man and it was like that's weird it feels like i mean not if they're like a sibling yeah no it was like

his girl best friend was like up there in like black like a black dress it was it felt like off it felt like yeah i guess you gotta be sleeping with that person for sure you'd probably be yeah i'd probably what tell them to shave their armpits oh did we have this argument on the podcast oh wasn't that on the podcast yes this that was an am i the asshole yeah oh you you and you were the asshole i'd stand by it i think if it's my special day and i'm a bride i'm gonna make you wear a funny hat at my wedding sounds awesome use your logic against you like a humiliatingly funny hat my day you have to wear the dunce cap um all right should we do some this guy rocks yeah hundo p this guy rocks

candidly i've already showed this to will and i regretted i regret doing it but i these guys rock so much that i have to okay lauren return the airdrop on please um well i like that hat yeah it is pretty killer okay well it sounds like we made this lady cry oh no wait she cried no no that's so bad the prank call oh no wait what what would the girl say is she mad at us no she told us she literally told us to do it what happened will read what she said bro she just sobbed on the phone i took a video but honestly it's just sad oh mom mom i'm sorry i mean she sounded like a perfect angel on the phone like just

did the woman tell her it was a joke okay well it's the daughter's fault not ours you were too real you made it too real oh this is my fault i'm saying you're too good of an actor oh god these are my guys that rock uh for the audio listeners it lauren if you turn the sound on oh man uh it is the video is two very tan italian men and they're just showcasing Jesus fuck Their Their friendship To

Tracy Morgan's Fast car Tracy Chapman Tracy Chapman Tracy Morgan is the guy You did this last time What You've done that exact

Faux pas on this podcast before Tracy Morgan You're called Tracy Chapman Tracy Morgan Wait what is What is that called Faux pas What does that mean

It's like French Like a slip up Like a mistake F-A-U-X-P-A-S That's us It's literally me and Will Walking through the streets of Italy Us going to get

Sweet green I just like to picture These two gentlemen I like that Walking into a bar And making it Everyone else's problem I kind of like them though

No no no In a good I'm saying like Like If I was an Italian woman And these two guys Walked in Yeah

There would be a Panty sized hole In the floor Between my legs because they would drop so hard these eyes holding the floor is crazy but yeah good watch again they have great hair the guy in the back the face he makes when they make physical contact it's like he's not happy when this man is not touching him it does look like someone's chasing them yeah they just they just like wait i want to keep like looking back and running a little faster

It's like These are the guys that just stole your camera In Italy on a trip Yeah I gotta send you I need to see this movie Brokeback Mountain I made a woman cry today

I wish we kept her on the phone for a little longer So she cried more? She sobbed on the phone She must love this fence yeah we're gonna have to come shave a couple she's probably look what lauren lauren except it's just sad she's probably a zach bryan fan so she hates us all right who's this i don't know no but what are we looking at a guy a guy let's just play just play it's seven seconds wearing a fuzzy black sweater and and white leopard the tightest

leopard pants you've ever seen he's really tall and he has glasses on i want to talk freaky but then again you might screenshot me. Wait, turn it up. Do it again. Wait, what? What did he say? Start it over.

Let's go to 100. Turn it up. I want to talk freaky but then again you might screenshot me. What is he saying? He said, I want to talk freaky

but then again you might screenshot me. That guy did not rock. What? He wanted to talk freaky. Go to his page. Go to his page. I didn't think that guy rocked.

I like his photo. It's kind of sick. Oh, he's a dancer. Yeah, I don't like this guy at all. This guy does not rock. Never mind, he rocks. This guy rolls. I...

I... That guy rocks. Yeah, he rocks. You're right. I spoke too soon. He does rock. Oh, and lots of Barnes & Noble. How many videos did he film?

There's one Barnes & Noble today. Oh, my God. He's viral. All right, Will, do you have any teach me some things? Yeah. Mine's actually a pretty short and sweet one. Okay. Which is I was recently reading online.

I found out Gavin Newsom was married to Kimberly Guilfoyle, who... I don't know who either of these people are. Gavin Newsom is your governor. Yeah. Why don't you put some fucking respect on his name? Who do you think keeps our streets so clean? He's the one who keeps our lights on. He manually cranks a thing out back.

Gavin Newsom is the governor of California. And when he was mayor of San Francisco in the early 2000s, he was married to Kimberly Guilfoyle, who is now the fiance of Donald Trump Jr. Isn't that kind of crazy? That is pretty crazy. And he's like, Gavin Newsom's likely running in 2028. and plausibly

Donald Trump Jr. could end up running would he run that'd be scary I don't know I mean there's such like a cult of like personality around Trump

that I feel like it would be like a logical like way to keep that going but like that's interesting but there's a chance that yeah

they'd both be running that would be yeah but also I'm just like wondering what her like she has horrible taste or yeah or just like

she's just like all over the place like I yeah they couldn't be more they're like it's very Dia well did you know

that all polar bears are left-handed? Are you making this up? Oh, God. You're just setting yourself up to be embarrassed again. What does that mean? All polar bears are left-handed. Yeah, polar bears are... Dude, where are you reading this?

Rusty, get one fact challenge level impossible. What are you talking... I just want to know where... Where do you get your information? I have the craziest facts of all time. We Googled it, and it immediately said it was false. I didn't look into it. That's the craziest fact of all time, even if it was true.

It's like a borderline. You saw this one, Cora. No, no, wait. Will, I got another one for you. Do you know that snails have four noses and teeth? Or slugs? Four noses? Polar bears have four noses.

No, slugs have four noses and teeth. Yeah, okay. I might have exaggerated. Four tentacles. I like slugs. I think they're cute. can you go if they have teeth why was there an article saying they're not like that's clearly a big enough rumor that like oh my god you have horrible you have horrible sources it literally

it i read it on reddit no i read it on the internet it said all polar bears are left-handed then we googled it in the first it just says polar bears are it didn't even say like they're not like they're sometimes left-handed just said polar bears are not left-handed it was just the moment you said i was like there's no way furious right now i even can't get anything right these days i know you well if you did even the smallest amount of research um like cross fact checking cross reference oh oh okay i got a better one do you know australia is wider than the moon that google it now i mean the bar this one's not real Google Australia wider than the moon.

Let's go. By 6,000 kilometers. That's pretty big. 600. 600 kilometers. Let me have this. That's pretty crazy. Quit biting my moment.

Oh, wow. Yeah, I mean, I guess it kind of makes sense, but that is kind of nuts. All right, Will, you get to decide. Do you want to do YouTube pranks that we think someone should do first, or should we do drinking games that don't exist first? I think the YouTube pranks one. Okay. all right these are youtube pranks that don't exist i got the i'm gonna grab your gum prank on

cops it's where pranksters go up and they say i'm gonna grab your gum and then the cop reacts and the guy there's a guy behind him holding the big like trident okay i like that um convincing my roommate he's the only one who's circumcised frank so we talk about like foreskin enough that he is like he brings up circumcisions and then we just have uh gone on his laptop and like made sure that he can't google it and we make him think that no one has ever been circumcised i like it uh i've got air horn during wedding vows prank this is uh pretty self-explanatory it's just a classic air horn prank but it's during people's wedding vows nice they love it usually usually get a hoot out of it um wedgie prank in the hood prank so anyone who's sagging you go and

give them like a big wedgie that's fun yeah i like that a lot kidnapping someone's child at gunpoint and then giving them airpods it's the final boss of like you know the ones that are like cutting people's headphones and then giving them it'll be like that's kind of like the mr beast one where he's like, I filled my friend's house with slime. Yeah. Give him a new one. Convincing my roommate he has superpowers prank. So I take things that would ordinarily be really heavy around the house

and we replace them with like a very light version. Okay. And then when we go outside to walk to breakfast, there's a man trapped under a car. But it's like a prop car and so he lifts the car off and then we walk around for the rest of the day with him thinking that he has super strength. I love that.

Reverse gold digger prank on super down to earth people. so initially you present yourself as very you pull up in a lambo you're flaunting all your money and you try to flirt with them and they're like no thank you and then you come back and you're really like down to earth and you're wearing like levi's levi's and like these shoes probably and then they want you and then when your car pulls up it's the rich car again and they're like oh and there's like an edit on it um tricking my mom into thinking my middle sister never existed prank love it we photoshop her out of every photo and we put it in with a an actor that looks almost exactly like your sister and

then uh you tell your mom that that's always been the sister and we see how long she goes before she loses her marbles i love that i've got moaning prank at funeral home we took different approaches to this it's like oh but like during like a funeral yeah my my approach is purely based on like all these are like some nugget based in things that actually do you know what's been crazy lately is these videos going around of like doing horrible things to like child predators yeah they shave their head they make them eat like a hot chip and like that is fucked up to me like obviously it's bad that he's a child predator but like it feels like a weird outlet for these freaks to like take out their like desire to like torture people it's insanity with that with to have like

an excuse where they can get away with it wait i don't i don't get it there's like these these like streamers now that they'll do like like catching child predator thing where they'll like go on the apps and like bait and find like guys who are trying to meet up with like 15 year olds and then they'll like be like we're gonna call the cops unless you come back to our house and then they will like shave their head and make them eat like insanely spicy food or like beat them up and like wild and it's like because they're child predators they like can get away with it yeah why is that because the guys wouldn't call the cops because they don't want to get caught oh and but it's like it's so fucked up too yeah i know little pump was doing yeah it's like shaving

a guy's head it's just like it's like these people have like some weird like really deranged people who want to like torture humans yeah and it also makes it like making it like content is gross to me it's weird like i don't think that's there's any yeah yeah i think it's like they'll like they think that they're like doing something yeah they think they're like good people but because they're humiliating these people yeah but strange two wrongs never makes a right it's true my last one yeah oh i'm sorry no worries i'm sorry my last one uh convincing my friend he's a world-renowned artist prank oh that sounds fun we go to a painting class the teacher is like you were showing some serious prowess like can i auction

your painting off we take it as sotheby's it goes millions of dollars that we we get them living like the high life for a little bit and then we see how they would react to now being like this genius and like super rich and famous person and see if they treat everyone different or if they actually like believe that they're a genius i i like that i also feel like there's a chance we're like in doing the bit like people start to be like yeah oh i get it and then like you're like oh it was a prank but then they're already actually successful yeah yeah ah cracking my knees all right good one willie hit me we like to play drinking games yeah what are some of your favorites oh man we had some classics in college uh did you ever play natural treasure no uh you

get a case of natty light and you watch national treasure and you drink every time there's a clue uh really subjective but yeah there's a lot turns out a lot of clues i like that uh we just played jailbreak okay yeah so you line up uh it's it's whiskey tequila and vodka shots and they're lined up in like a board game style kind of trail and you roll a dice and you get to move that many steps forward whatever you land on you take that shot here's the twist the whiskey are like jail wardens and you get sent back um to the start if you land on whiskey two rolls in a row you have to go into solitary confinement and shotgun a beer uh tequila are uh people that will help you get out of jail so you keep moving and vodka you stay exactly where you are wow yeah that was that

was well thought out i'm pretty excited i think i'm gonna play it okay i've got natural treasure two book of twee crits it's where you watch national treasure two book of secrets with a case of twee and you drink every time there's a clue guess what there's a lot of clues yep have you ever played x roulette no it's a way to test who has the best relationship with their exes while getting fucked up so uh you call your ex if they pick up if your ex picks up you're safe uh if you're blocked you take three shots and if they don't pick up you take a shot if that if they yell at you though you get to give a shot to another person okay i like that so there's like a weird like you want to you just don't want to be in the

middle yeah you need to yeah yeah yeah okay duck duck booze uh it's like duck duck goose but then when when you say booze then you both have to finish your drinks yeah instead of them chasing you no and then they you have to finish your drink and you have to stop down your tracks both finish your drinks and then they chase you what if it's what if well everyone's running around while you're running everyone has to chug until the guy catches the other guy that could happen too well maybe that's your version because i fucking yo come over to my house we're all playing duck duck booze duck duck booze i well i was just thinking about like duck duck goose would be a funny game like if everyone was like drinking because then it's like harder to like get up and run and like

yeah uh my next one's so bad have you ever played who am i no each person picks a celebrity to impersonate okay you then ask questions to the other players to try and figure out who their celebrity is if the answer is yes they drink and if the answer is no you add a shot to the communal cup if you guess someone else's person you are done playing and you're safe players keep drinking until there is one remaining and that person has to drink the communal cup wait i got confused in the middle so if if i ask you a question like is your celebrity an athlete And you say, no, I add a shot to the communal cup. Oh, I get it.

And then at the end, the loser has to drink the communal cup. Oh, that's fun. Yeah. But the person that's answering the questions never would have to drink it. No. Okay. This is Stink Cup. Stink Cup is a game where you lay out 50 cups on the table,

and one of them reeks. I don't care what you put in there, but that thing better smell the high heavens. Okay? You throw a ball. you all stand like five feet away from the table so like you wouldn't be able to smell which one it is you throw a ball whatever one it lands in you have to drink whoever drinks the stink cup throws up and that's not even a rule that's just a consequence it's literally impossible to not can't uh you ever played airplane roulette no you and your buddies you get a case of beer and you

head to the airport baby and you you sit right under where the planes go each person is assigned an airline and when your airline uh when your airline flies out you have to finish your drink okay I like that so if like I'm Delta and you're Southwest and Lauren's Spirit and a Spirit plane goes Lauren's drinking baby

that's fun that reminds me we used to play the car game growing up where me and my dad would sit out on the porch and we'd pick a color and then you got a point

every time your color went by and you could change color at any point oh nice but that made it like you'd be like red and the reds were cold so then you'd switch to silver

and then a red car would come back and you'd be like oh ah what else you got with it oh more yes

um yes jester's gamble you all sit in a circle and you deal cards one by one any card that isn't a joker you're fine if a joker is dealt you must go outside with a a big big like trash barrel full of all sorts of mixed liquids and and you have to get in it and then drink a beer nice it feels like you kind of winged it at the end what did i only write four maybe my last one is therapy uh there is a deck of cards with uh prompts that will tell get you to tell stories about your life and uh every time you cry you have to finish your drink i love that all right uh lauren whose personality you're gonna steal this weekend you go first um i'm to steal corduroy the bears i think overall forgot about that homie yeah overalls are sick and i

haven't had a pair in forever and i thought they were cool do you get some no i might though i could if i wanted and i like the hats that he wore and just like he's kind of general vibe i'm stealing luke bryan's personality i just think that guy's a hell of an artist and really top of his game country wise and brian wise so is he the best brian i just spilled so much water probably yeah why okay because i'm in the middle of watching spirited away i'm gonna take chihiro's personality okay because she just seems like a little adventure gal agreed and i like her vibe and i it's the first anime i've ever watched actually beautiful and i'm enjoying it i like your cut g my dad used to show it to me a lot growing up and uh i hated it because their

parents were monsters wait you tried he showed it to you a lot but yeah well he was very like he used to go to japan a lot for work growing up so he was very much like he would always bring back it's like that was when we like we only had like yeah eight vhs tapes that we would kind of like cycle through and that was one of them my sister with totoro and that and i remember my walking in on my sister watching that and i had the same kind of uneasy feeling yes it's like kind of creepy for it is and it's only pg i was kind of shocked that's what i mean like it's a good movie now but it's like i can't yeah it's weird kids yeah 100 because it's yeah all right what should they comment this week comment comment the last person you blocked and why you blocked them perfect

all right and your favorite luke bryan song yeah favorite luke bryan song oh oh and go go comment your favorite luke bryan song on zach bryan no no no we can't we can't okay yeah but you can't say we sent you yeah just comment you just feel like i loved i loved this song and put and put a luke bryans say i loved you i loved you and shake it for me girl yeah country girls zach if you want if we want to duke it out you can come on and we can settle the beef all right we love you guys have a great rest of your week and a good weekend and we'll see you on wednesday bye-bye bye-bye For 50 years, Canadians have wondered what the names of IKEA furniture mean.

Like Natopa, the guardrail for children's beds. Natopa means giving your favourite person room to grow. It means their safety and your piece of... No. In Swedish, Natopa means night monkey. Mom! He's back! IKEA. 50 years of Swedishness at home. Look, he's wearing little pyjamas. So cute.