Wiretap - It's Time

Episode Date: July 6, 2020

Ever feel like life is passing you by? Matt Danzico shares the solution he's been experimenting with: The Time Hack.

My group chat thinks I'm the smart one, but I have a cheat code. I take 10 minutes each morning and listen to World Report. Knowing what's happening in the world helps me feel connected and make better informed decisions. But endless doom scrolling is not my idea of fun. So I just listen to World Report on my commute, get informed, and get on with my day. World Report, the day's top stories in 10 minutes, wherever you get your podcasts. is a CBC podcast. I'm Jonathan Goldstein, and you're listening to Wiretap on CBC Radio 1.

Today's episode, it's time. So, because I'm 28 years old, going to be turning 29 in this year and 30 in 2012, I figured I better make 2011 last for as long. long as humanly possible. And how do you intend to do this? Well, I read some research by a scientist named David Eagleman, who maintains that when you experience something new and unusual, your senses are heightened, and you record more

information onto your brain. So when you go back and replay that experience, it slows it down for you because your brain has to shuffle through so many more memories. And that explains why when your child, your adolescence seems to have lasted for so long. It's because every single activity that you participate in is new. It's so true, yeah. And so in an effort to really slow down my own perception of time, I've created a project in an experiment called The Time Hack.

And what I'm doing for the project is I'm having a new and dynamic experience every day for 365 days. for instance, riding a mechanical bowl, attempting a headspin, cooking dinner in a fireplace in my apartment. And a part of this is that you're documenting all these experiences at your website, thetimehack.com, right, through blog posts and video recordings. Yes, exactly. So what I should say, though, is on a technical level, how the project works is I take a timer, a small timer with me to each new experience, and I time that extent. experience, but I don't look at how long the experience is lasting for, meaning I don't look at the actual time when the experience is finished. And then I attempt to estimate how long I thought that experience lasted for. So, for instance, on day one of the time hack, I fought a boxer.

This is boxing. I'd never fought a boxer ever in my life. I know nothing about boxing, I know nothing about fighting at all. So here I am. for the first time, fighting a professional boxer, right? And the events being timed. And we went, I think, something like five rounds, right? And after five rounds, I was exhausted.

I was extremely bruised. And I really had lost sight of how much time I thought passed. But the whole idea of the project is I had to estimate how long I thought the boxing match lasted for. And then the time that it actually lasted for is post. posted under a secret link on the website also. That you do not get to see. That I do not get to see.

I see. I don't want that to influence how I'll perceive future activities. And now how long did you actually think you were fighting for? I think that probably lasted about an hour. Okay. Can I ask you to cover your ears and maybe create some noise so that I could share with the listeners at home, how long the experience actually lasted? All right, all right, right, right. Okay, and the actual time recorded, 43 minutes.

Are you done? Yes, I am done. I am done. I was afraid I was about to come in on the tail end of that one. So the idea is that you're constantly trying new things, but a part of that feels like you're also doing uncomfortable things, like reciting the alphabet in public. Yes, that's a very good example of an uncomfortable activity.

I was uncomfortable watching. it on your website so I went to Union Square in New York City and I I stood up on a fountain the edge of a fountain in front of what I would guess would be a hundred or 200 people walking by and scurrying past if you've ever been in Union Square you know that's a pretty big hub for pedestrians and I just started reciting or singing rather the alphabet in front of all of these people just spontaneously and they all sort of stopped and looked at me and it was really bizarre and uncomfortable.

And do you recall how long you thought the event lasted? Yeah, I think it lasted around 48 seconds. Okay, and I will ask you once again to assume the dignified position. Okay, here I go. And it was actually only 24 seconds, huh? Okay. Are you done?

Yep, safe. Okay, cool. When you are involved in the experience, are you counting in your head, or would that be like cheating? I wasn't at first, but as the project has sort of progressed, I've begun sort of making mental notes. And so my brain will sort of like click on when I believe I'm at minute one and minute two, minute three, and so on and so forth. And what's been one of the more memorable things that you've done? Having dinner with a homeless person was definitely one of my more memorable experiences in the whole project. So what I did is I made up some bag lunches and I walked downtown to DuPont Circle,

which is a neighborhood in Washington, D.C., and I found a man standing outside of McDonald's, and I asked him if he was hungry, and he said, yeah. I'm Raymond. Nice to meet you, Raymond. He took the bag lunch, and he went through his life. while we were talking and explained to me where he's been and what sort of has brought him to those circumstances. And what was unexpected was that he told me he had been in jail for murder. And he explained how he shot a person with a handgun at point-blank range.

You never heard of that show of America's Most Wanted? Yeah, right, yeah. I was on the land for 44 months. Four years. That is a long time to be on the run. And I'm sort of there chowing down the sandwich I made in my nice warm appointment. warm apartment, you know, it's freezing outside and I'm standing next to this

guy and this, like, really deserted street, really late at night, you know, listening to him explain how to get away with murder. And how long did you think the whole thing lasted? I think the experience probably

lasted for about 19 minutes. Okay. And I shall reveal the actual time to our listeners? Fingers and ears. Okay. It was actually 1706. That's pretty good. Okay.

You done? Yep. Okay. So today is day 48 of the project. You've got 317 days to go. And so far, what have you taken away from this? Have there been any surprises? I think what surprised me the most about the experiment is how I perceive time when I'm not engaging in something new.

I at first found time to slip by. extremely quickly. I mean, I would sit down to watch television and within an instant. I mean, literally it felt like I just blinked. One hour was up. But that's changed recently. Mundane experiences or repetitive tasks feel like they're moving by extremely slowly now. You know, we've come to this point as a society where we can manipulate so much of what's around us. We could change the temperature. or we could change the picture on the wall with our liquid crystal displays, you know. And yet we're still falling victim to this very basic thing that we all have to deal with, and that is time. So the idea is to just understand that you don't have to fall victim to time.

Everyone knows that you shouldn't sit around on the couch and just let life pass you by. Everybody knows that. I'm just trying to collect the data to prove it. It was really great talking to you, Matt. Thanks so much for coming in. No, thank you for having me here. Just for the fun of it, how long do you think we were speaking for? I think we were speaking for roughly 63 minutes.

It's actually been eight and a half, but I have that effect on people. Come in Howard? Hey, hey. What? How you doing? Am I bothering you? I'm just a little taken aback.

You never knock on the studio door. I saw you through the glass. You seemed like you were busy. I don't want to bother you. I'll come back later. I've never seen the sigh to you. No. You seem sort of blue.

Yeah, I'm feeling a little bit down. I was cleaning up my apartment. That's pretty odd I know I actually wasn't cleaning up I was looking for something What were you looking for? A pancake You get slipped between my papers and books

You know, it's so thin It's hard to find I don't I had it out of my bookshelf And I guess it slipped through somehow I had to start taking everything off Why would you have a pancake on your book? I always leave food surprises

For myself all over the house And I'll say well there's a little snack Like sometimes I put like jelly beans in my shoes You know you put them on and say Well what's this You've got a little jelly bean I put a nice you know It can all be frank

In the toilet paper roll You put a new toilet paper roll on there. It's like, whoa, for the little hot dog. It's nice. Why would you want a hot dog in the toilet? Not in the toilet, in the toilet paper roll. In a fresh package of toilet paper. Yeah, but...

I'm not disgusting. Right. Anyway, I was looking for the pancake, and I put my hand through, and it fell down back behind the bookshelf, and as I was reaching down for it, I saw this letter. I pull it out, and I see it's this letter that my dad gave me when he was sick, and then... Your dad died when... Well, he died, I guess he died when he was about 19. So it's...

Well, he was really sick at the time, and it's sealed. It says, on, look at this, look what it says here. Open when I am dead and gone. Wow. Yeah, and very serious guy. You never opened it? No. You know, my dad was really hard.

He was always so hard on me and stuff, and I guess I was always disappointing him. I just, at the time, he was sick, and I didn't feel like I can really, even deal with whatever he had to say. But then before you know, time, you know, time just slips by and here I am, you know. So, I have this letter and I just, I didn't really have the guts to open it by myself. So I figured I'd just come on by. Do you mind, like, keep me company as to open this letter? Is that ridiculous, or?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, of course, Howard. I mean, I didn't, I guess I didn't know your dad very well. He liked you, you know. He did? Yeah. You see, it didn't necessarily seem like it. He was a tough love kind of guy.

You know, he, you know, he didn't know, he didn't express pain. And, you know, if we were happy, what would be happy about? And if you're not feeling well, it's like, what do you know from suffering? So it was just very hard. There was just no way to please him. And there was no in between, you know, so you remember my dad? Yeah, no, of course. I mean, I didn't, he was a hard guy to get to know.

He was quite a young. He was usually at work. he was always at the butcher shop most of the time when I was over. Yeah, I mean, he was gone, five in the morning, he was at the market. Yeah. Because he was like he was like a butcher grocer, and he was gone all day, and he'd come back at midnight. We had a cousin or someone who wanted to get into the business, and he said, if you want to eat your supper at midnight, then this is the job for you, you know. My most, I have a couple of distinct memories of your dad.

I remember being at your house when I was a teenager and him forcing me to pull his hair. Do you remember that? Yeah, I mean, he was very proud of that, yeah. He really did have hair of iron. I'd pull as hard as I could, he just laughed, you know. We used to make jokes that we were going to tie his feet to the car, you know, and then tie his head to a post and we were, like, actually drive to see, you know. But, yeah, it's incredible.

Very, very, very tough hair. Tough hair, tough guy. I mean, he had a hard life. You know, he lost most of his family. And, I mean, he was born in a really small, you know, it was a dwarf, you know, never mind a stettel, it was a dwarf. Well, what is that? I mean, a dwarf, a dwarf is like, you know, that's a dwarf.

a suburb of a stettel. It's like a dwarf makes a stettel look like Manhattan. And this was in Poland and his family went through a lot and, you know, most of them went to the camps and he escaped through the underground and I mean he was in Canada by the age of 12

he became a butcher. That was his trade, never liked it also. He didn't? No, never liked being a butcher. Really? Yeah, my dad couldn't even watch medical shows on television. It just gave him like flashbacks to his job. He had a sense a humor. He was funny.

He had a cruel sense of humor. Well, I remember one of his favorite jokes was putting his hand on the stomach of anyone who was fat and asking them how many months. Yeah, no, he didn't make people laugh. I mean, he made himself laugh. He made people angry, you know? I don't even know if he thought this was a joke. I think he actually believed this, but I remember I was a little kid. I was in diapers still.

And I was sitting in the backyard and my dad was reading a newspaper. My dad was often just sitting there reading the paper when he wasn't working, especially on week or whatever. And I remember I must have said something like, I'm hungry. Daddy, I'm hungry. And he just looked at me, he put the paper down, he said, he gestured towards the grass. And he says, eat the grass. And I said, people don't eat grass. We don't eat grass. He said, cows eat grass. Sure you can eat grass. Eat grass. So I started grazing. At some point, my mom came home and she started screaming at my father and they started having

this huge argument. And meanwhile, you know, the man let me eat half of our backyard. I mean, the part of the story is, you know, that was kind of cruel. But the other thing I learned is that, yeah, you actually can't eat grass. If you're absolutely loving your summer read and don't want the book to be over, your experience doesn't actually have to end when you finish reading. I'm Matea Roach, and on my podcast bookends, I sit down with authors to get the inside scoop behind the books you love. Like, why Emma Donahue is so fascinated by trains, or how Taylor Jenkins Reed feels about being a celebrity author.

You can check out bookends with Mateo Roach wherever you get your podcasts. So here I got this letter and I don't know what to do. Well, I mean, you know what to do. You got to open it. Maybe, maybe another time. You know, want to get something to eat? Let's go to the cafeteria.

What are you talking about? You came over here. I know, but now I'm chickening out. Chicken. I'm in the move for chicken. Howard. You want to go into the cafeteria and get some chicken on a bun? Chicken on a bun.

Okay, Howard. He's changing poultry. Open the letter when we're done. Come on. Obviously you want, you know, you came here and... All right. Go back. See, it's stuck really well because of aging because he had a lot of saliva.

Oh, boy. All righty. Dear Enoch. Enoch. That's my Hebrew name. Enoch. Dear Anach, I passed this letter to you. Look how it's misspelled.

All these crazy Y-O-O. He has a nice penmanship, though. Yeah, his spelling wasn't so good. Dear Anach, I pass this letter to you because, as you know, I am not long for this world. The doctors say it may be a week, it may be a month. Only God knows. You are now 18 years old When I was your age

I had already fought in the war Married your mother Open my first butcher shop And had your sister Ruchee You are 18 And you do nothing You sit You look at squirrels

You eat How will you be Self-sufficient When I'm gone you don't go to school you don't work you talk about your crazy dreams but you sound like a dummy

wasn't that that was sort of like your dad's nickname for you I remember yeah yeah it's kind of sweet he would always call yeah it was like a dummy what are you doing dummy he once called me dummy I think really well that's nice see I told you he liked you

uh none of your dreams will come true believe me i say this as a father i am afraid that in death you will shame me yourself your family and most of all yourself i know that you have a head on your shoulders remember when you came to the butcher shop with me when you were seven and you cut meat good you had talent I told you you could have a career as a butcher

but you said you wanted to be a kung fu master and I said you were a dummy what will be your future I won't be around to know This is what is hardest I love you And I'm sorry I won't be there to help you

Please think about what I say Your father who loves you Nathan That's funny I remember that I remember that day When I was cutting meat Yeah he was encouraging

it's that's so nice he never really said anything like that before like that he actually uh i mean my dad never said he loved me you know and so how do you so how do you feel reading this now i know well thanks for you know being with me here you know that was kind of difficult you know but uh i guess the thing that's the most uh difficult for me is you know that you know i wish she was around you know to see me today to see that i did good that I'm, you know, I'm, you know, I'm success, you know, I mean, I don't mean in a bad way, but I mean, I guess, you know, I proved him wrong. You know, I, I'm a happy person and, you know, I've had many careers and...

That's true. You know, he was afraid that I wouldn't be self-sufficient and, you know, you know, got cash in my pocket. Yeah, usually my cash. Yeah, I mean, had he known, you know, he would have been nicer to you. Maybe he would have called you like a stupid dummy. You know, he's when he was really, really in a good booty, he called me stupid dummy. Anyway, I'm going to

I'm happy I opened it I wish I'd opened it 20 years ago But anyway, yeah I mean You know, getting emotional Always kind of makes me A bit hungry Do you want to go get something to eat?

Sure, how Let's go to the cafeteria and get some chicken You know, it would be nice actually Personally what I wouldn't mind You know, is maybe we could make a little Lahayam to my dad Maybe raise a glass to Nathan You know, would you want to

That sounds like a really nice idea How sure I'll have some chicken And a little schnaps kind of thing Absolutely They serve wine in the cafeteria, so we'll have some... Well, I was thinking more... You was more of a vodka kind of guy.

I mean, you must... Come on, just pull up one of your flask there. We'll have, like, a shot of something hard. I don't carry a fun. You know, my dad really like Chinese food. Maybe after we can just go for some Chinese food. After eating chicken? Just in the spirit of, you know, my dad's letter.

Okay, Howard, I think it's a little... You know what I'd like if you took me to that nice Chinese place because they have egg rolls. He loved egg rolls, and he loved pineapple chicken. I knew what he loved. He loved when people treated him. You know, and I'm very much my father's son. He raises something.

Clearly. So maybe you'd get me a nice... I'm not getting you a Chinese meal. Yeah, we'll get some peaking duck or something. After eating chicken. The poor guy never had peaking duck. You didn't honor my dad. Let's have some peaking duck just to honor him.

All right. Something nice and expensive. You know what? Now you're pushing it. For my dad. You don't want to disgrace my dad's memory. I don't want to disgrace his memory. You're a good buddy.

You're just get some chicken. Hello, Goldstein Talent Management Enterprises, manager to the stars. You do not answer the telephone that way every single time someone calls. How's my favorite client? I'm your only client. That's not true. Oh? I just signed Buzz Goldstein. Ever heard of him?

My father. Why, I guess he is your father. That's right. I hadn't thought of that. Yeah, I signed him to some speaking engagements, or he talks about your bedwetting problems as a kid. I had no... How you ever came it with prayer. He's going to be talking about Raisin Goldstein.

Actually, that gives me another idea for an animated show for kids about Raisin Goldstein, where every other kid is a succulent grape, and you'd be little Raisin Goldstein, a little shriveled up nobody of a raisin. Okay, the reason I'm calling is because of this watch that you sent me. Oh, yes, you're welcome. You got my watch. Gregor, this thing's a nightmare. I think a simple thank you will do. Oh, do you hear that?

That's your watch. And it makes different sounds like that practically every 20 seconds. It's a watch alarm. I pre-programmed it to remind you of how you can work to help yourself and help your career. And what is this supposed to be a reminder for? That's to update your Facebook status. You know, like, status update. I got some ice cream and now it melted and I'm sad.

Five minutes later. Status update. I'm still sad. Okay. Status update. I am a sad man with no ice cream. I get the idea. Okay, and what is this one supposed to be reminding me to do?

That's the alarm that reminds you to check for halitosis and underarm odors. I have to do this at a prescribed time during the day. Subtally, not so people notice. Yeah, they're not going to notice. They're going to hear turkey and the straw playing on a loop at top volume. Yeah, it's how polite society functions. No, no, it isn't. You know that. You don't know that. You know why?

Because you don't understand the first thing about polite society. You are like a cur that I found wild in the wilderness, and I'm training you to be a... a house dog. A house dog that has a very helpful watch, strained to its paw, that tells them what to do. Oh, okay, here's another alarm. And what's, what's this? Let's see, what's 1135? That would be...

It sounds like my car's being stolen. That's the one that reminds you how to tie a winds or not. Remember you said to me, you can never remember how to tie a winds or not? So every single day at 1135 a.m. I have to endure this alarm to remember to... Only until you learned to tie a winds or not. This is just like training a dog, Johnny. Listen, Gregor, this thing kept me out.

all night last night. Well, that's good. Quit trying to sleep so much. You're never going to get anything done if you lay in bed all day long. And what is this dignified sound? That's just a fart sound effect. Farts are funny.

Come on, Johnny. Don't be such a stick in the mud. Look, the point is, life is short. Time slips away before we get to do the things we really want it to do. We dream of this cruise to Africa, and then we're on our deathbed and we say, geez, I never got to take that cruise I wanted.

Soon you're going to be dead. Stone cold dead. Thank you. And the ground rotting. Oh, that's nice. Worm food, my friend. You're a real pick-me-up. What this watch is going to do for you

is going to make you aware of the passage of time in a way that you were never aware before. Every time you hear a chime, it's like the chime of the Buddha. It's bringing you right back to the present moment. Does the present moment have to be so loud? What do you think? If I turn down the volume on every one of these arms, you know what you would do?

Get some sleep? You would sleep all night. And you know what's going to happen in the morning? You're going to have terrible morning breath. Wait a second. I have an idea. Keep Johnny from sleeping so he never wakes up with morning breath. Where was I?

If you paid attention to every one of the alarms that I worked out for you, in six months' time, you'd be 50 pounds lighter, and you'd be about two inches taller, and you live in a much bigger house. Okay, Gregor, I am putting this watch in the trash disposal. I don't want it, okay? Go ahead, put it in the trash disposal. That's fine, but I don't give up on you so easy, Johnny. So if you don't want the watch, I have my plan be all in place.

What is that? I'm downstairs, ringing your buzzer. What are you doing? Sending your messages. We don't need the watch. This is going to work out much better. I'll do five buzzes like this. Squat thrusts.

Trimms your buns. Oh, God. One long and three shorts like this. That means I want to come upstairs. I have to pee. One short buzz like this? Get away from my door. That either means it's push-ups time,

or maybe you're getting a delivery because someone showed up and they buzzed your door. Stop. Hey, maybe it's a special guest. I'll get your dad buzz. I think he's got the perfect name to buzz your door 24 hours a day. On Wiretap today, you heard Howard Chackwit, Gregor Ehrlich, and Matt Danzico, whose time hacking experiment can be followed at thetimehack.com.

Wiretap is produced by Mirabert Wintonic, Crystal Duhame, and me, Jonathan Goldstein. For more CBC podcasts, go to cbc.ca.ca.com slash podcasts.