With The Perrys - How to Tell the Truth

Episode Date: April 15, 2024

Preston operates in a number of roles: husband, father, evangelist, apologist, poet... and now, he's added "author" to the list. The Perrys discuss the spiritual opposition he experienced writing his first book and why they believe the enemy didn’t want this book to reach the world.  How to Tell the Truth isn't a book that teaches you how to evangelize "like Preston." It's a book that robs every believer of the excuses that keep them from sharing the Gospel. Here's the good news: you don't need seminary training to tell the world about Jesus.  How to Tell the Truth: The Story of How God Saved Me to Win Hearts, Not Just Arguments releases on May 21, 2024. Pre-order here: https://preston-perry.com/how-to-tell-the-truth This Episode Sponsored by: https://liberty.edu/WiththePerrys — Get your application fee WAIVED when you start your future with Liberty University today! https://www.covenanteyes.com — Try Victory by Covenant Eyes FREE for 30 days with promo code PERRYS! Subscribe to the Perrys' newsletter: https://withtheperrys.myflodesk.com/zhfus4jx1s Join Preston's discipleship community for men: https://www.patreon.com/PrestonPerry/membership To support the work of the Perrys, donate via PayPal: https://paypal.me/withtheperrys Shop BOLD Apparel: boldapparel.shop Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcomes, welcome. Whelcomes. Saints and Nates. They just say welcomes. Because I thought of Saints with an S and then it came, it came with the welcome. Welcomes, everyone's, everyone's. How are you? I'm doing good.

I like your little beard. My little beer. Like people always got to put the little. I mean, big beard sounds strange. I like a little beard. Thank you. I like your makeup. I'm trying.

You're getting really good at this. See, here's the thing. I realized this is a sermon. you ready for it? Everything's a sermon with Jackie Hill-Pair. Hey, in and out of season. So I started, we both, but I started working on my face, like exfoliating, niacinamide, hyaluronic acid, like all the things.

And working on my face and fixing my skin has then transformed my makeup. So I'm not really doing nothing different. It's just that my skin is better. And I think the sermon is, is sometimes we want to fix the outward appearance, hello. But we don't want to fix the thing that's underneath because when the thing that's underneath is healthy, when the thing that's underneath that's underneath

don't got no blemishes, when the thing that's underneath is whole and well and beautiful and pretty and shining and all the things. When you put some on top of it, it just glows better. Woo! That was a whole word, young lady. Yeah, makeup is like putting on cracks. But can I tell the people?

That was so good. That was actually really good. I don't think you liked it for real. No, no, for it was real good. Okay. I'm not capping. But let me just tell the people. So, you know, like,

last season I was like man I didn't brush my teeth you didn't brush your teeth no I don't smell nothing the cameras got better that we used or whatever and I just started seeing all kind of blemishes you know and discoloration in my face and I started the little light skin and dark skin I was like how you do that wow wow it's just called hyperpigmentation yeah I'm sorry you're playing a video oops and so Jackie gave me like this whole routine and people been like what you're doing with your skin and I can never tell them actually what I'm doing. I just do what you tell me to do. So cleanse your face. Okay. Treat your face. Protect your face. So cleanse. You wash it not, but you gave me like nine different things. You wash your face. Yes. Wash it off. And then you put some type of exfoliant on

there. So H-A-A-A-A-B-H-A, some type of peel, whatever. You shouldn't do that every day because that's a little harsh on your skin. But you put some type of exfoliant. Then you put some type of serum or cream on there, vitamin C serum, whatever that might be. And then you put a moisturizer on that, which will seal all of that in. And then sunscreen, because black people, we be thinking because we got melanin that somehow like we're like the sun won't hurt us. You understand what I'm saying? And so when I watched this lady talk about it, she was like when you do a skin regimen

or whatever and you go out into the sun, the sun attacks, which just did. And so you got to put the sunscreen on there so that it all works together. I'd be saying black people said it for years. A son like black people. You know what I'm saying? The sun affects us too. Right. And so it's a process.

My skin ain't where I wanted to be, but it's on the way. I ain't allowed. When you first gave me all those things, I was irritated. I was like, I don't want to do this every week. Well, I think some of it is age, too. I didn't have to do as much to my skin now as I did when I was in high school or early 20. Like, I think there's something about age that just makes you have to work harder to

maintain things that you didn't have to maintain before. Yeah, we're getting old out here. Well, you are. You're almost 40. And you're not getting old? I'm not getting as old as you. Oh, my gosh. 40 is next level.

That's like, that's... I'll be 40 in a couple years, but you're 35. I'm 34. Well, you're fin to be 35. Anyway, Preston wrote a book called How to Tell the Truth. Tell us, tell us about... I don't want to say, tell us about the book. I don't want to say, why do you write it?

because when I do interviews and people ask me that question, I think it's boring and uninteresting to say, what did you write the book? I think we can explore the motivations for why you wrote it through the questions that we ask. So I'll say this. How does it feel like to be a black boy from Chicago who used to get kicked out of class all the time,

who peed in a trash can because the teacher wouldn't let you go to the bathroom, who used to fight people who almost died, who almost got stabbed in all the things, who've seen people die in front of their eyes. Like, how does it feel? Just made my life sound like a beat. How does it feel to be a black boy from the streets of Chicago

who slept with all these people and all of these souls? And somehow God preserved you from having 17 baby moms. How does it feel for that person to be an author? That's the question people need to be asking. Mom, if you're watching this, I'm sorry.

she just laid it all out there. Hey, that's your story. Go ahead. It feels good. Wow. It really does feel good. It feels surreal. You know, it doesn't feel real that even like, even now that I'm looking at the book is like, wow, I'm an author.

Yeah, this is the book. How to Tell the Truth, the story of how God save me to win hearts, not just arguments. And so, yeah, I mean, it feels, it feels. it feels it feels dope you know to think about all the stuff that I've been through and I don't talk about my my story as much as I think a lot of people would like for me to talk about it I never wanted to have like the typical uh yeah I made it out the hood and I never wanted to have that that testimony but you know when I was writing this book I definitely felt late even though this book is is geared towards evangelism and apologetics I felt laid by the Lord to talk about my story and how I

got there to encourage just the everyday reader, regardless of where you come from, to know that God can do a lot with your life. And so if you say, if he gets your yes. And so it feels good. I think being your wife, I realize how the devil didn't want you to write this book. And I don't mean that, I don't know if the word is facetiously. I don't, I don't mean that in a, in a hyper spiritual way. I really do think that there was a lot of resistance. Yeah, it was. you writing this book. Why do you, because it's not primarily about you, right? Yeah.

But what is it about the content of a book where you're training and teaching people how to make disciples, how to evangelize, how to do apologetics? The fact that we have all these things on this carpet bothers me. Because it says that our kids are in here with jolly ranchers and jelly beans or something and it's just spilled all over the place. But like how, how, how, like, what is it about the content of this book that you think warranted spiritual opposition. Yeah, I had a lot of spiritual opposition

when it came to this book. And it was weird when, you know, the first post I made about it after I came back from my sabbatical on Instagram, I talked about that and I talked about like just how out of all the things that I've done in ministry, I received the most spiritual opposition writing this book.

And I think one of the reasons why is because I think that there is a different type of spirit spiritual warfare that you would experience once you start to venture outside of the church and to teach other people and to teach Christians how to venture outside of the church to reach the loss. Explain. Because I think this is just new territory. I think that there is like I think that there is a in-house spiritual opposition that

the enemy does to attack the church. But when we start going out there and dealing with different principalities and different, you know, religions and different. and just people who are lost, like the enemy does not want people who are lost to be found, nor does he want Christians to be equipped to know how to reach them, right?

And so, like, he wants us to go to church. He wants us to go to conferences, but he does not want us to talk. He doesn't want us to talk to our cousin who is a Hebrew Israel at the family reunion. He doesn't want us to talk to our sister who does New Age religions and praise the crystals and all this stuff.

He doesn't want us, he doesn't want us to have the tools to do so, And so, you know, I think the book is practically teaching the everyday believer. It's not even teaching the seminary student. It's teaching the everyday believer to go out there and to reach the loss. And I think that's one of the reasons why I had so much spiritual opposition writing this book. You are an everyday believer because you're a regular human being, you know, but your opposition now is particular to where you are now. what I mean is you not only had opposition

when it came to writing this book, you also had opposition when it came to Bowel TV and going out and doing street evangelism. I'm interested. What do you think opposition to evangelism and apologetics looks like to people who don't have books and don't have YouTube channels? Yeah, which is, that's a good question.

I think that's a lot of what I covered in the book. I think that the enemy tries to attack us with fear. You know, this idea that, if I go and have a conversation with somebody that I'm going to look stupid or I'm going to yeah I'm going to I'm going to look like I don't know what I'm talking about or I'm going to mishandle the gospel and I'm going to do a disservice to the gospel and it tries to attack us with shame and you know insecurity but also the fear of people just we don't we don't want to deal with the fact that if we say something that's true, we're afraid of how people may look at us,

how people may treat us. And so I think it's a lot of, I think it's a lot of fear there. And I think it's a lot of resistance when it comes to apologetics and evangelism. Because I think people have this idea that they have to know a whole lot, that they have to be seminary trained to give the gospel. But I don't, I don't think that's true. I think that you have to know the key foundational essentials. We just did a podcast with Eric Mason, and he talked about that, knowing the key foundational essentials, knowing what you believe and why you believe it. And I think that once you know why you believe in what you believe it,

what you believe in why you believe it, I think you have to know your context. You have to know what's around you. You have to know what beliefs are around you and you have to know what they believe in while they believe it. And then you have to figure out ways to give them the gospel. kind, gentle, respectful ways that that's effective. Hey, Saints. I recently spoke at Liberty University's Convocation. It's one of the world's largest gatherings of Christian students.

Convocation is an example of the university living out his mission to train champions for Christ. For me, my experience at Liberty was cute. It was beautiful. The people I met were humble. They were kind. They were thoughtful. The campus was all fancy and top of the notch and top tier. And I appreciate any institution who's,

focus is on equipping the next generation for Christ Center mission, evangelism, apologetics, all the thing. With more than 700 residential and online degrees to choose from, you're bound to find a field where you can turn your passions into a career. Plus, Liberty offers multiple scholarships and discounts to help you achieve your dreams at a price everybody can afford. Students at Liberty represent all 50 states in over 65 nations, their campus is more than 7,000 acres with state-of-the-art facilities, more than 120, student-led clubs and 20 NCAA Division I programs, there is something for everybody. And this is the good part because you are a podcast listener, you'll be able to get an application

fee waived when you apply at liberty.edu slash with the parries. Once again, that's liberty.com.edu slash with the parries. So go check out Liberty University and all that it has to offer at liberty.edu slash with the paris. Somewhere in the Bible. I should have Googled it before we came here, but, you know, I had added to. Ephesians 4, I found it. Verse 11. Talk about Jesus when you ascended how he gave gifts. And he gave the apostles, the prophets, the evangelists, the shepherds and teachers to

equip the saints for the work of ministry for building up the body of Christ. How does somebody... Okay, so Matthew 28, Great Commission, go therefore, make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father. of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, teaching them to obey all that I have commanded you, low, I'll be with you out of what. So there's a sense in which all Christians should be evangelists.

All Christians should be going out and telling people about Jesus, proclaiming his coming kingdom, all the things. Yet Paul in Ephesians 5 says that there are those who have received a gift or function in a kind of office of evangelism. What's the difference? like what's the difference between the the evangelist who got the gift and the evangelist just is out here being a Christian. Do you know what I'm saying? Yeah.

Yeah. I think every I think it's a difference between being evangelistic. And I don't know if evangelism is office, so don't come from me. Yeah, not an office, but I do think it's a gift, right? Okay. Thank you. So I think it's the difference between being evangelistic and being an evangelist, right? Because I think evangelist would tell you, I have a lot of evangelist friends.

I think they just have a burden for the loss. Okay. You know, I think they just have a burden that they think about the outst, the people on the outside of the church a lot, right? And so when you become a Christian and you have a deep, deep desire, not to just read books, but to read books and go out and tell everybody about what you read and why you read it and why they need to read it and why they need to read it and when they come here. It's probably because you have to gift of evangelism. Okay. Right. And so I think a lot of times people have a gift of evangelism, but they just don't know it.

Right, because the church has done not a good job of cultivating the gift of evangelists, right? And even creating an environment where evangelists can thrive in the church. But I do think that every Christian should be evangelistic in some way because Matthew 28 is given to all people. When it says go there, make disciples of all people, which means nations, which, you know, it's talking to the everyday believer. Right. It is saying that we should in some way, shape, shape, or form. you know, be producing others like ourselves. And I think how that looks like is different.

And so I just want to encourage the people, the Christians out there who have a burning desire in their heart for the laws. And I also think, I want to say this, I also think that there's different levels of burden, right? Because I think people like me, I get in the Uber-Roy and, you know, I was in D.C. the other day. and I could tell that God was a Buddhist. And I was like, I couldn't, I didn't have peace until I started a conversation with this man.

You know, that's just the way I'm built. But I think a lot of times people have, you know, a heart for the people in their family. You know, I want to reach their sister. I want to reach. And so I wanted to, I wanted to target both audiences. I wanted to empower the evangelist. But I also wanted to teach the everyday believer, man. They're going to be conversations.

And you cannot escape this. They're going to be family members. They're going to be friends. They're going to be coworkers. They're going to be classmates who need the gospel. And so how can we use practical tools and empower the church to be able to reach the loss in this way? It's interesting because people that follow meet us probably recall last year when we were in San Francisco and how we went to some little market or whatever.

And I went in there to get a coffee. Preston out here talking to these Jehovah's witnesses. And I sat there on the corner without joining them. And I made a little story about it because I got to wait for you to finish. Talk about the Watchtower organization and what's his name? Jay's Taze Russell and Charles Taze Russell and all these people. And it started this conversation around people knowing their role and knowing their gifts. And I think somebody, if people didn't know me, somebody could like let's say I, I

didn't have a public ministry, it could look like a cop out for me to say, I'm going to let my husband go do evangelism while I sit here on the sidelines, right? Yeah. But I do think that it's been interesting in our marriage to explore the distinctions between our gifts because I do evangelism. I just don't do it like you. Yes. And so that's really good. So one of the things to that, I wanted to do a lot of things with this book, but one of the things that I wanted to do in this book is I wanted to destroy this idea that evangelism has to look one way. Because I want to give people the freedom to know that God will use you how he has uniquely made you.

Like, period. Like, I think a lot of times we see people do evangelism and we think we have to do it that way. And so what I want people to know is that I'm not teaching you how to do evangelism like Preston. Come on here. I don't want to create. I opt out.

Yeah. I don't want to create more me. I want God to use you how he has uniquely made you. And one of the stories that I wrote in the book was when we were in the airport, leaving Virginia for your brother's retirement ceremony, I saw some Jehovah's Witnesses in the airport. And I felt compelled to go talk to them. And there are people who feel compelled to talk to people from different religions

or the loss in that way. And I was like, yo, Jackie, you want to, you know, I'm out of the first. go talk to these Jehovah's Witnesses and you was like Okay, I'm gonna go get some breakfast. Peace. We better catch this flight. I will pray for them on the way back to Atlanta.

And you and you left and got something to eat. I think I told this before. I think we tell a lot of different, a lot of the same stories on our podcast. But what encouraged me is was after I got done having the conversation with the Jehovah's Witnesses, I came and I saw you with your head down praying with the waitress.

And I'm like, okay, if my introverted wife is praying with somebody. It's for a reason, right? Because like I said, you don't have conversations often like me. And afterwards, she was like, yeah, she was like, where your husband is, where's your husband? I say he's over there talking to Jehovah's Witnesses. You was like, yeah. She was like, yeah, I used to be a Jehovah's Witness, but they disown me, yada, yada, yada, and you were able to give her the gospel through that. And I use that story to encourage people to know that it's not about being like the evangelist that you see, but it's about being ready.

Like God will use those who are ready. And so you don't have to be like me. But the question is, are you ready? I tell people all the time, the moment you tell somebody that you are a Christian, you are an evangelist, the moment they start asking questions, you become an apologist.

And the moment they're willing to follow you, you become a discipleship maker. And so I think that if we are going to show, our faith, it looks different. But when we share our faith, know that we might have questions and then, you know, apologetic conversations might have. And then when people are willing to follow us, I think that's how we can start making disciples. And so I want to just let people know, like, no, God is going to use you, how he uniquely made you. I think some of the content, like apologetic content that we see online, whether that was from Rabbi Zacharias or Jeff

Durbin or the McDowell's, like it can seem really intellectual, which might add to the intimidation because it feels like evangelism and apologetics is just argumentation around certain doctrinal ideas and disagreements. Would you say that that is a misconception of what evangelism and apologetics is? Yeah, I do. I do. I think that there is different levels of, evangelism and apologetics. I think depending on who you talk to, the conversation might lean more intellectual. I think the average person is not scholars.

Right? And so I think when we see Jehovah's Witnesses, I want people to know those aren't scholars. They're just normal people who are misinformed respectfully, but who are faithful with what they have. even though what they have is not the truth. Right? And so you don't have to be a scholar.

You just have to know the key foundational essentials of the gospel. Who is Jesus and how he has revealed himself to his creation? Is the Trinity true? And if it is, how can I explain it using scripture, not analogies that really doesn't explain how God exists? Yeah. Right? What is the gospel? Are we saved by grace through faith in Jesus?

and not about works, and how to properly explain the gospel story and the gospel narrative. Because when you talk to other people in different religions or different backgrounds and different worldviews, you will see that those are the three main things that pop up.

Most religions believe that they can obtain salvation through works. The Bible teaches us differently. Most people, most religions and different worlds, views actually believe that Jesus exists. They just deny his deity. So how can we use scripture to explain that? Most people, not even just religions, just people, they don't know the gospel story. And so if we can explain those things, right, and be ready to explain those things, I don't think that it has to always lean intellectual. Now, if you run into Jehovah's Witness scholar one day, go get another scholar, right?

A Christian scholar or go, you know what I mean? But I think that people have to understand that they're, that, that everyday Christian can actually do this because around you are just everyday people who are just misinformed. And if you know the gospel and why you believe what you believe, you can impact them in crazy ways. I think a strap.

The devil don't want us to know that. Okay, go ahead. The devil don't want us to know that. Go ahead. That's all. No, you look like you getting stirred up. No, no. That's all I want to know.

You pointed on my knee. Okay, I'm just saying. Yeah. Okay. They went back in. All right. So I fully believe that in any ministry, the sermon, aka wisdom, is necessary.

Right. Because sometimes you can read a book and be like, okay, I'm going to go evangelize to people. They don't believe this. So every single person, it's like you create a script where you just applied that script to every. I think Ray Comfort was a lot like that where he's like every single person I meet, have you lied before, have you did this? You were broken to the laws, blah, blah, blah, blah.

By the, by you on the mission, you are a sinner? Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I'm not saying that's bad, but I do think that some people need a different strategy. So I bring that up because if people watch you on Boat TV, one thing they'll see is when you were talking to the lady who was an atheist, it was more around, science more around, you know, it was more reasoning and intellectual. But when you talk to the girl

who worshipped her ancestors, it was much more intimate and dealing with her pain and her hurt. It wasn't all mind. It was a lot of heart. How have you learned how to discern what people need in those moments? So I told that's such a good question. That is a good question. And so it's such a good question. Pornography isn't an easy topic to hear about, but it is a topic worth talking about. That's why we've talked about it more than several times on this podcast because porn is damaging. It's damaging to marriages.

It's damaging to our bodies. It's damaging to our friendships and our intimacy. It's damaging primarily, though, with our relationship with the Lord. As some of you may know, I've had my struggle with porn. And I think Covenant Oz is a dope app and a dope ministry to help us not to do just fight porn in our lives, but to help encourage other people to fight porn in theirs. Did you know that 56% of divorcees state pornography as a leading cause of their divorce? 47% of Christians say that porn is a problem in their family right now.

So as Preston just talked about, Covenant Eyes for 23 years, has been the number one trusted software program for helping people have a porn-free life. Victory by Covenant Eyes is a powerful tool that helps Christians who are serious and want to quit porn for good. And Victory combines industry-leading technology. with decades of experience and leadership and recovery content, accountability, and behavior change.

The Victory app has powerful accountability features built in and the optional blocking technology makes it an unparalleled tool in the fight to live a porn-free life. Living a porn-free life will bring you new freedom to live honestly. Remember accountability is not just others calling you out on your sin, but also others calling you up

to the person that you are in Christ. Anyone can get started on their path to recovery for free by visiting coveted eyes.com and using the promo code Perry's. That is P-E-R-R-Y-S for 30 days free by clicking on the link in the show notes today. That's covetedeyes.com and be sure to use the promo code Perrys. And I talk about that a lot in this book because I think I tell, I say this all the time. If you ever went to a workshop from me, I say that if we find our information, if he find our identity and the information we know and not the God we know that we will treat people like

projects and not image bears. And so I do think that there is, that there is helpful methods, right? But if we try to use the same method with every single person, it stops to be, it's not as effective, I'll say. And so one of the things that I want to teach people is, man, when we go out, we really do have to be sensitive to the Holy Spirit. and how we should approach each person. But also, too, you still have to have a general understanding of the different type of people that you talk to. For example, when I talk to an atheist,

because an atheist has a high emphasis on intellect and reason, I have to drive another vehicle to get to the same destination. Right? But when I talk to somebody who worshipped her ancestors, there's especially a lot of black women in Atlanta and a lot of our inner cities or whatever, the main component that drove them to their, their worldview is hurt and pain and rejection and this, and feeling like they're being stripped of power.

And so they're trying to gain some type of dignity. And so me just, so quick example, like when I talk to the lady who worshipped her ancestor or whatever, the first thing that I thought about was all the scriptures that dealt with ancestry or worship, she told me she worship her. But as I was talking to her, I felt like the Lord was saying, Preston, she knows all this. She just hate what she knows.

Yeah. She just hate what she knows. Right. And so now I have to find a different vehicle to get to the gospel. Right. And so I started to ask her, what happened, you know, did you come from the Christian church?

And so asking good questions will allow you to get to that destination, you know. And so I think, you have to discern, but I don't believe in you using the same methods with every single person, right? Because I think that every person that you talk to has a cry. Yeah. You just have to ask the right questions to hear it. Yeah. Right. Jude actually kind of recommends that in the book of Jude, which I have a Bible study on, by the way, I'd be forgetting I did that. But he begins his letter telling people to contend for the faith. Right. Right. The faith, meaning the essential fundamental

doctrines that make up Christianity, contend for it, fight for it, wrestle about it, right? But then he shows us towards the end one of the ways we apply that, which is we apply these truths in different ways depending on the need of the person. So Jew one chapter, or it's only one chapter, verse 22 and 23 says, and have mercy on those who doubt. Yeah. Save others by snatching them out of the fire. To others show mercy with fear, hating even the garment, staying by the flesh. So he gives you three different strategies for contending, which is to say that, like, you do need to have, I think you should know the basic things that people need, but be flexible

and how you apply that depending on what the person, where they are. That's good. That's good. And I think a lot of people might be surprised when they opened the first chapter of this book. And I think this is the reason why. because I think when you hear, I think in the past, we've had a lot of evangelist books, a lot of apologetics books that are, that is very like one, two, three, step one, do this, step two, do this.

But I'm a poet and I'm a storyteller. And so I wanted to teach a lot through narrative and stories. And I wanted to teach for that different reason because I think God has given me a plethora of experiences dealing with different worldviews. And I do think that I wanted people to see themselves. in these interactions because we have so many opportunities to give the gospel every single day but because we don't know how to practically give the gospel

and have the tools to do so. I think that we just stray away from it, we just ignore it. But I wanted to teach through narrative to show people know like you can actually do this. And I also wanted to teach through failure. Uh-huh. Right?

Because I think a lot of times when people see people sharing the gospel, they think every single mess up is just detrimental. And it's like, no, God actually can use your messups, right? And so as you're trying to learn, right, God can even use your insufficiencies. Right. And so I have a lot of failures in disappointing times or whatever that I wanted people to learn from as well. You talk about your grandmother.

And it seems as if she might have been one of the first evangelists you've seen. which is unorthodox because when we think of evangelists we think of men some of us think of white men who are real smart articulate all the things but you you set her up as a model of apologetics explain that story yeah that's a i didn't know you's going to ask that question that's that's a good question so like i said i want to make evangelist evangelism and apologetics normal for the everyday believer. And the reason why I use my grandmother as an example

a lot in the book is because she was the first person who displayed these gifts to me. My grandmother was a short, not educated woman at all.

And I remember I tell this story in my book. I'm telling all the stories. But there was a time when my uncle Stan. He was murder. Sam's. It's like what? Sam,

because some people, when they talk about their book, they want to hold it all in. It's like people sign up for Costco because they're giving out samples. Yeah. That's a marketing tip.

Yeah. Go ahead. Whoa. Yeah, I tell his story in my book about when my Uncle Stan was murdered. My Uncle Stan was a guy who really helped raise me. He was like a father to figure in my life.

And somebody set him up one day, killed him. And my family was distraught. He was like the, one of the pillars of my family, very popular man in Chicago, was on a radio, very famous in Chicago. And I remember this time where we all descended over my grandmother's house to be there for one another. And I remember going over my, my grandmother's house, telling myself, I'm going to cling to my uncles because I was so broken at the time as a 13-year-old young

boy. I remember saying, I'm going to cling to my uncles because, yeah, they were strong. They were the strong people and I knew I was going to gain strength from them. And I remember arriving there and being so surprised that they all looked like little boys, that they all looked hopeless, that they all looked. And I just remember feeling deflated. Like, man, there's absolutely no hope. If my uncle Ray and my uncle standing and my uncle Ronnie is walking around looking like this, there's no hope.

And I remember the next day my grandmother came out of the room and she walked up to my mom. and she said Preston And she said Pam My mom's name is Pam She said I want to go in the room And I don't want anybody to bother me I want to just stay in there all day And my mom was like

You don't want no food or nothing She was like no I don't want to eat I don't want to drink I don't want nothing And she went in the room And she stayed in that room all day I can hear a singing praying

shouting and all that And then like around 6 p.m It just went quiet Long story short The next day my grandmother came out of the room And she just looked different I really can't explain it. She looked different.

A face looked lighter. She came out with a bottle of oil in her hands. And she started to anoint all of our heads with oil. She started to pray for everybody. And she started to sing songs. And I remember the song she was singing. She kept saying, if I suffer, I'll gain eternal life. And I was like, where is this woman getting this strength from?

Like, like, she's just so strong. And fast forward, like five years later. later, I'm thinking about coming to the faith. The nation of Islam was very appealing to me at this time because I felt like they were just strong black men. And I went in my grandmother's room and I said, Grandma, remember when I Stan died and you went in the room and you said nobody to, you know,

you don't want nobody to bother you. And I said, the next day you came out and you just looked very strong. I was like, what was that? What did you get that strength from? And she said something I'll never forget. She said, Preston, when Stan was murdered, I didn't know I was going.

I didn't think I was going to make it. She said it was a time where I felt so broken and so deflated that I couldn't be strong for my family for the first time of my life. And I prayed to pray and I said, Lord, either give me the strength to be strong for my family or take me right now. And she said at that moment, I entered into God's rest and I've been there ever since. And I wrote that story in the book to let people know that my grandmother, she couldn't tell you what presuppositional apologetics was.

she couldn't break down propitiation. She couldn't explain a limited at home in like you can. But at that moment, she was an apologist. At that moment, she was ready to give a defense for why she believed what she believed. Right. And I think that when we think about apologetics, we think about deep intellectual arguments and confrontation. And we have to know the Bible front and back. But she knew the gospel.

And she knew why she believed. So when 1st Peter 315 tells us to always be prepared to make a defense for anyone who ask you for the hope that is in you, get to do it with gentleness and respect, he wasn't talking to the seminary student. He wasn't talking to the person who reads systematic theology books every single day. He was talking to people like my grandmother. And so the question is, are you ready? Are you ready to answer like why you believe in this great Lord and Savior?

year. And so that's the overall vision that I want, wanted people to get through that story and other stories like it in the book. In the book of Acts, there's this situation when I think Peter and somebody else, they were, you know, getting persecuting all things. And they told them, hey, y'all can't speak in this name no more, BTW. So they go back to the house church or whatever, and it says that the believers pray for boldness. And they say, and they, receive it, right? I guess what does boldness actually look like? Is boldness, and we've talked about this before, we have a whole episode on it, but what are

some misconceptions about boldness and what does it look like for you even to, like, what is, you're already a bold person, but is there a certain supernatural kind of boldness that shows up and what does it look like when it happens? For sure. Think about Peter and John. when they were arrested. That's who it was. Okay.

Yeah. Peter and John, right, in the book of Acts. I wrote about that story in the eighth chapter, in the eighth chapter of the book because, because I think when people think about boldness, they think about doing what men are afraid to do. But I don't think that's what boldness is. I think boldness is not doing what men are afraid to do. Boldness is doing what God empowers you to do. Boldness is about obedience more than it is about fearlessness to men.

And so when we think about boldness, we have to think about supernatural strength and supernatural power, right? Because people look at Peter and John, right? When they was outside, what happened in the book of Acts, they just healed a man that was crippled. Right. And this was after Jesus was killed. And the thing is, Jesus, being a follower of Jesus was dangerous when he was alive, but it was more dangerous after he had been killed because he was officially labeled a criminal and a thief, right? And your association with him and your public proclamation of him can give you the same destiny that Jesus had, which was supposed to be killed, which is the reason why the disciples went and hid after Jesus died because they were scared.

But after they healed this crippled man, they were thrown in jail. And I could just think about how they must have felt when they were in jail. right they were in jail all night right and not even knowing if they were going to be headed or be hung or be crucified and for them to um for the for the officers to come the next morning and say what what name do you speak in speak of and for them to have the power the bible says that they were empowered to be bold in front of them right that god gave them a supernatural strength that he did they did not have when they were hiding and they lie and and and jesus have to walk through a door and say like, I told y'all this was going to happen.

Like, why y'all in here hiding, right? Right? And so I think that's what God wants to do with the church. I think God wants to give the church supernatural boldness, a boldness that isn't, that isn't contingent on our personality trait. Because I don't think that's what boldness is. I don't think boldness is a personality trait. Boldness, because a lot of people can be bold, but they can be a bold fool. Yes.

That's not effective. Yes. And so if you're not afraid to speak, but you don't know what to speak, you're not effective anyways. And boldness also doesn't mean harsh. Yes. Or like boldness is not always a rebuke. Yeah. Boldness, right, right?

Because boldness is about standing up for Jesus. I think I said this on the podcast before, but Joseph of Arimathea, who stood up to acts for the body of Jesus to bury Jesus in his own tomb. He was bold. He didn't come to, he didn't come to Caiaphas and curse him out. But he just said, you know what? I need that body. Mm-hmm. I know like y'all might be mad at me about, you know, trying to give somebody a dignifying burial when he's considered a curse.

And I know he need to be thrown. I know y'all think he should be thrown in the power of all the other cursed bodies or whatever. But no, I need that body. You know, it was prophesied in the Old Testament that Jesus would be buried in a rich man's tomb. And guess what I'm that rich man. I need that. Right. And so I think that's what boldness is.

Are you willing to stand up for Jesus when the time calls for it? Are you willing to stand up for your faith even when it's not popular? Are you willing to say the true thing when everybody on social media will be like, man, she's doing too much, he's doing too much? Or do you just want to fit in with people on TikTok and be culturally relevant? You know what's real bold right now is pollen. It is just... Your allergies is messing with you. No, it's getting insane out here because it's like pollen really want to fight me.

That's what, you know, like I'm on two Zyrtex and a Benadryl and a half. my gosh, I'm sorry. And I'm still out here, you know, with a left eye watering, but we're going to make it through. Yeah, yeah. You can be bold and be loving. And I think that love actually is the root of boldness. I don't think boldness is the source of going out and making disciples or evangelizing it apologetics. I really do think it's love. Primarily love for God and love for neighbor because I think love makes you selfless. You know what I'm saying?

Because if I'm out in about teaching or whatever the case may be, if I'm like turned in on myself, that means I want security. I want safety. I want to relax. I want to chill. Like ministry is everything other than that. You know what I'm saying?

Like ministry, you got to die of yourself. You got to care about people. You got to ask questions. You got to think about them. You got to discern. You got to pray. You got to do all the stuff.

And so like what does it look like for somebody to love people in their evangelism. Does it make sense what I'm saying? Because let me share it this way. We watched this clip one time of somebody giving the gospel at, I don't know if it was planned parenthood, but it was some type of abortion situation. Yeah. And you say how the woman said that she was raped.

And what did the evangelist do? The evangelist was like, so she should baby die? just because you were raped. And I was like, oh, man, did he really just drop that ball? He did. And I think he thought that was boldness, though. Yeah, yeah.

Because I think, I think boldness without the spirit just makes us fools. And I think boldness without the spirit makes us insensitive. And I do think that there's a possibility to do more damage with speaking if it isn't done with Christ like love, which is the reason why the Bible tells us, because even when we think about First Peter, can we go back there real quick? It says, always be prepared to make a defense. And, you know, which that's what the Greek word apologetics comes from, you know, Apologya means to make a defense. And I think a lot of people park there. I need to be prepared to give a defense. And so they only focus on argumentations. That's good.

Right. And so they only park at the argumentation part. But then they ignore the rest of the sentence when it said, but do it with gentleness and respect. That part. Having a good conscience so when those reval your good behavior in Christ maybe put the shame. Right. Because because what people have to understand is if you give somebody the gospel or if you give somebody the truth in a garbage bag and not on a dignifying platter, they didn't reject the truth. They just rejected the way you gave it to them. And so. when she rejected him, you know, he called her out for rejecting the gospel. I pray you repent, repent, and my heart for you, whatever. But it's like, no, like she just literally gave you her story on a platter. And then you wrapped up the truth. You gave her the truth, but you put it in a garbage bag full of trash and you said, take it. And it's like, no. And so First Peter 315 lets us know that we always have to be prepared to give a defense.

but the way we give it to it, the way we give it to people matters. Yeah. It matters to God. And so this is the reason why I named the book, to be honest with you, how to tell the truth with the assistance of my beautiful wife as, you know.

Who came up with that name? You did. You did. Because like literally, Jackie came up with the name because that's what the heart, that's like, that's what the book is about. That's the heart of the book.

It's like, how can we learn how to give people the truth, but in a dignifying way, that's palable so they can receive it. Because if we have the truth and if we know the truth, how can we give it to in a way that people can accept it? I kind of want you to explain this verse a little bit more. I'm going to read it and I'm going to ask you a question. 1st Peter 315 says,

but in your heart, honor Christ the Lord is holy, always being prepared to make a defense to anyone who asks you for a reason for the hope that is in you, yet do it with gentleness and respect. What would it look like for an evangelist to honor Christ the Lord as holy. Like, what does that actually mean?

Yeah, that's good. That's good. Well, one, I think context matters. Okay. Peter is talking to the persecuted church. Okay. He's talking to people who have been persecuted, right? And so, one, he's talking to people who might be confused about why you're even still a Christian, right? Be prepared. People are going to ask you questions, right? And so I think, you know, when you, when people ask you questions, sometimes they might disagree. And so then there will be kind of an argument, you know, confrontation there, right? But it's really about just being prepared, right?

And so I think what it would, to answer your question, in your hearts, right? I think it's very important for us to understand that that scripture first starts off with a heart issue, not an intellectual issue. It doesn't start, it doesn't say in your mind. It doesn't say with your thought process.

It says in your heart. And so apologetics is a heart issue, not a mind issue. So that's the first thing that we have to understand that Peter is addressing the heart in your hearts. Honor Christ the Lord, right? And so one, if you believe like, it's a reason why he said honor Christ, right? So if you believe that Jesus is the Christ, the Messiah, right? You should be prepared to give a defense of why he is that, right? Which brings me back to what I said earlier is that people will acknowledge that Jesus existed.

but they will deny his deity. My God. Right? And so if our hearts want to honor the Lord, we then have to defend the fact that he is the Christ, that he is Lord over all our bodies, the way we show up, how we treat people, how we use our money. He's Lord of all.

We have to be able to defend that and to tell the world why he's Lord of all and not just Lord over me, but Lord over you too. right? And then we have to honor him as holy, sacred, right? And so he then starts all, then he ends, um, uh, uh,

was saying, but do it with gentleness from respect. He goes back to conduct. So look, this defense part is literally sandwiched with a heart that honors the Lord. And it's, and then, then it goes to the defense.

That's the meat. Uh-huh. And then it, it goes back to conduct. Uh-huh. That's the other part of the bun. But yeah, but do it with gentleness from

respect. And so I think when an evangelist and an apologist goes out there, it's like, man, how can I honor this Lord, how can I honor God as Christ as Lord, as holy in a way that gives him, that gives him honor while dignifying the people that he created? And so I don't think that we, a lot of times I think we drop the ball. I think that we want to honor the Lord at the expense of boo-boing on people. And God is saying, that's actually not honoring me. Uh-huh. because you're actually making the gospel look like a liar with the way you give it. And so if you give people the truth,

but on a garbage bag, right? They can still walk away, not believe in your message because the way you gave it to them. And so that's, I think that's what First Peter is letting us know. Like you, you, you, you,

you gave them a reason to reject truth because you were a jerk. And so we have to figure out, how to tell the truth in a way that gives people not an excuse to reject it at all. Right. And so I think that's what I'm trying to teach people in the book. That's one of the things I'm trying to teach people in the book. I have so many questions.

I said a lot. I'm sorry. I mean, you should. We got, you know, an hour. Because what's in my mind is really also me giving you space to answer. pushback that we've talked about on Boat TV. Okay. So some of these questions are that.

One is you were having a conversation with somebody and somebody was like, this is why we need profits to engage with these conversations to go straight to the heart. I can understand advocating for some kind of supernatural presentation on the mission field, right? Like, oh, that's just a spirit. I don't know why y'all doing all this intellectual type of stuff. Like, what do you think is the tension or the interplay between certain, like, spiritual gifts in conversation versus re, do you get what I'm saying? Because you have times where you're talking to somebody who clearly has a spirit. Yeah.

Right. So what made you choose to actually just have a conversation versus deliverance? Because I could see somebody like, no, they just need deliverance. There don't need to be no conversation. Yeah, yeah. I think I can understand. Does it make sense? Yeah.

So basically what your accent is, because I think the girl who said that was like, man, you're doing too much reasoning with them, Preston. You need to just say repent. Yes. And turn from your sin. No, she was talking about you need, she needs prophecy. Like you need prophecy that speaks straight to the heart. But I think, let me be clearer.

I can, I think there are times in ministry where. reasoning isn't the first thing. Right. Where it might be a spiritual thing. For example, you have Jesus delivering people of demons and then telling them something, right? You have Paul in Acts with a girl with the spirit of divination. He did not reason with her. He just called out the spirit, right?

Right. And so I guess, like, do you think that there is room in evangelism for deliverance and addressing demons? That's basically what I'm dressed. Oh, absolutely. Absolutely. I definitely think that there's room for addressing, like, demonic oppression, possession and all of that. I think that, and this is the reason why I think that you have to be sensitive to the Holy Spirit, especially when you're going out there, you're going into different environments, different worlds,

you're dealing with different principalities, that there is, that there should be a level of sensitivity. to the spirit to say, man, like, you know, I think you're dealing with some stuff. Can I pray for you? So you would say that those times, it's like, oh, let's just pray. Yeah, let's just pray. Yeah. And I've had those moments. Yeah. I've had those moments. They haven't been caught on camera, but I've had those moments. But I do think that a lot of times comments can be made by people like that in the church who doesn't have a lot of experience with giving the gospel in the outside world. And so they don't even understand, like a lot of times questions like that are raised because they don't even understand what reason looks like and how God can use reason because

Paul reason with people outside of the synagogue. It literally said he reasoned with them for hours, right? And so that there is a spiritual component, but we have to know that God can also move with intellectual conversations that if you give people questions that they've never even heard before, right? That they can, like, we have to understand that it's still spiritual. Like, because I think sometimes

really church people can look at people who reason with people and say, man, they need to just be more spiritual. And it's just like, no, like, it's still all spiritual. Because Jesus said my word is spirit. Yeah, my, the, the, the, the word that I'm giving is spirit. And also that if you know how to construct a question

that will get them to think about things in a way that they've never thought about it before, you can't underestimate what the Holy Spirit is doing with them when they leave. And this is the reason why I don't care about seeing conversion in front of me. Explain that. Because I think the church has conditioned people

to want right now results. We praise alter calls. We count the heads that come up on the stage, but I think God wants to raise up a generation of evangelists who are okay with not seeing the fruit of their labor until we get to glory. I think God wants to raise up a generation of evangelist who are okay with being seed planters.

Because I heard the gospel when I was 16 years old in a house church, and I didn't give my life to the Lord until four years later. But the first time I heard the gospel, nobody prophesied to me. Nobody came and gave me a prophetic word. Nobody came and even told me to repent. I heard the gospel and I became keenly aware of my sin and God started to pursue me from that day.

Right. And that's because a seed was planted. That's good. And so I do think that there is different methods. It doesn't all have to look the same. Yeah. Right. I do think that God wants to use people who are dedicated to reading scripture.

Yeah. Who are dedicated to understanding different arguments in the culture and society and having those hard conversations because I do think that he can do a lot. He can do a lot without reason. But I do think that sometimes we need to just tell people, yeah, about your head. I'm going to play the theme and now you real quick. I remember you telling me about when you first came to faith, how when it came to sharing the gospel, it was hardest for you to do that with your family. Oh, absolutely. I imagine that sometimes it's hard for people because your family, they know you. they know where you came from

they even know what you still struggle with how would you encourage people who they ain't got no issue giving the gospel to people at school or at work but when it comes to their parents when it comes to their siblings when it comes to their cousins it actually is just more

difficult. Yeah, quick story. That's a good question babe. Quick story. When I came to the Lord, I was led to Christ by an evangelist and so I got out there and I started sharing the gospel fast. When I first became a Christian, people thought I was the boldest little thing that you ever seen. Like I was telling everybody about Jesus. But the first time I went to my first family

reunion, I was a coward. I grew up with 16 boy cousins. And God quickly showed me that, that, no, you still want to fit in in this space. You don't want to create this awkward environment. You don't want your cousins to think that you think that you're better than them. And I knew they all heard I had changed. And I still wanted to fit in. I didn't know how to give the gospel to them. And God quickly showed me that it's nothing wrong with having cowardly moments at times.

Just don't die that way. Just don't die, coward. That's terrible, the way to die. Yeah, yeah. Because the Bible says that coward won't inherit the kingdom of God, right? Because a coward, when a coward is who you are, it's impossible for the Lord to use you. And it's impossible for the Lord. It's impossible for you to see the Lord when you're a coward because you only,

you're only thinking about yourself. You're only thinking about your own comfort. And it's hard for you to even think about the will of the Lord, let alone people. Right. And so God had to quickly correct me, you know. And I think God free me when it came to giving the gospel to my family members when he showed me that everything doesn't have to look the same. I don't have to go in the first time I see my cousin say, man, let me sit down. I'm going to show you how to repent.

I didn't have to do that, right? Because sometimes we see Jesus doing both. We see Jesus giving the gospel and revealing himself to the woman at the well. That was evangelism. Yes. Right? But we see people, we see Jesus walking with this disciples. having a relationship with people.

That's also in some ways evangelism, right? And so we see that it looks different, right? And so with the family members, a lot of times it's a slow cook. Like I think a lot of times we want to try to fry fish before we catch it. And this is like, no, like if you're like, if you're around your family members and you live a life that's worthy of the gospel, natural conversations will pop up. Right. And so I had this pressure when I first became a Christian to go on.

around my family members and to and to always think like how can I give them the gospel what if they do this what if they do that and it's just like no god was like no just go amongst them and live just go amongst them and live and be ready when they have questions and so that free me um and i i saw that that i was a coward because i was overthinking interesting i was i was i was just overthinking a lot right but but I do think that there is a natural fear of losing friends and family members because of what you believe yeah that's just a natural fear yeah

but at the same time one thing I'll say this and I'll end this little rant what God has shown me through the years is people might people might have a problem with what you believe but when life start lifing if you are consistent, they'll double back and come back around.

And so one of my close cousins hated the fact that I was a Christian. Would ask me questions like, man, like you feel like the Christian Christian people, more of your family than we is.

I saved your life multiple times. Like I wrote about it in the book. Like he was upset, right? And I told him, I was like, man, I love you. but I can't ride with you like I used to ride. I don't believe what you believe. I don't believe that, you know, Christianity is the white man's religion, yada, yada, yada.

And when life started life in, when he went through relationships problems, when he got arrested, that's who he came to. You? He came to me. And so I think that should encourage people to know that it might be rocking in the beginning. But if you live a life worthy of the gospel, you ain't got to, you ain't got to force the gospel down people's throat. they'll come back to you. So when does the book come out? So the book comes out May 21st.

Okay. And pre-order is available now? Pre-orders are available now. Okay. Yeah. All right. Well, thank you for teaching us how to tell the truth.

Cool. Bye. Love y'all. With the Parys is produced by the Parrys with support from Amanda Reed and Channing McBride, video recording and audio production by Kim Powell, Abashai Perez, and Xavier Fairly,

edited by the team at trade lively, artwork by hop and music by swoop. Thank you for listening. Now go with God.