Wolf and Owl - Bonus Email Episode #2

Episode Date: February 5, 2021

It’s another Friday bonus show - if you keep sending us questions, we’ll keep answering them! We tackle… round three of Tom’s celebrity endorsement beef, some advice on getting into acting, dealing with compliments and vegan insult comebacks. Thanks for all your emails - keep them coming at [e-mail] Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Yo, what you want? Beak or jaws? Feathers or fur? Sharp teeth or feet with claws? Whatever's preferred. They'll grant you all last requests to steady your nerves. Then podcast the body parts, get severed and served. Bring your weak shit, wear the wolf and owler. That ain't just a mistake, that's an awful howler. Outro Music sun to the moon you'll see nothing all you hear is a huff a puff and a expect killings red spilling

and flesh ripping impressive in it the death bringing his head spinning just kidding every word in this song's about two grown men dressed up as a bird and a dog welcome to the wolf and owl this is our second bonus episode wow two bonus episodes in the fortnight that is sweet sweet these people don't know what they're getting man i mean it's like yo happy friday yeah you're sitting there on a wednesday thinking i've got to wait another week for some of this goodness and then pow all i gotta say is keep those emails coming in because robin she's loving doing the clerical side of this oh do you know what there's nothing that i enjoy more than scrabbling through the emails and

printing the ones off that we're going to read out so that tom can rock up and criticize my selections oh what we need to do is probably look at getting someone who could do that for us yeah yeah because your clerical skills i mean you're hilarious what do you mean well you just got loads of really good skills but if you were working for me as a secretary i'd be a bit like sorry sorry ron now uh do please keep emailing at tom uh wolf owl pod at gmail.com very nice uh so please keep sending me now again same as before i'm just going to go for emails randomly and let's just see what we get here okay so now do you remember last week?

Yeah. Uh, we talked about George Clooney and espresso pods and, you talked about your outrage. Yeah. Um, about George Clooney promoting something that he didn't support. Right.

Yeah. So we've got an email here from Tom Tunstall and he says just seen a clip of owl on league of their own just so you know outside of the context of the podcast you can call me romesh i don't think you can i think i was great okay so just just seen a clip of owl on league of their own he becomes so angry at Mo Farah for not being vegetarian, yet endorsing corn. Seem the same dynamic Wolf may endure, should he ever visit one of George Clooney's espresso barren houses.

Wow. Tom Tunstall. So what Tom Tunstall is saying is that the owl is a hypocrite. I don't think he said that. I think what he said was... Hypocrisy is a rife in the owl. The owl is riddled. Riddled, I say.

Riddled with the disease. The disease known as hypocrisy. Did you really go in on Mo Farah? Yeah, I mean, listen, there's some context to sort of set in there. First of all, I was obviously sort of exaggerating my feelings on it for the benefits of the panel show, do you know what I mean, listen, there's some context to sort of set in there. First of all, I was obviously sort of exaggerating my feelings on it for the benefits of the panel show. Do you know what I mean? I do.

It grieves me. It grieves me massively. Yeah, but can I just say something? I think Mo Farah and Korn is different to George Clooney and Nespresso. No, I judge him in the same manner I judge George Clooney. If he's not a vegetarian, he shouldn't be. Because he's taking – you could have done that advert. I mean, you're like Captain Vegan.

You know what I mean? Everyone would have known that you are a vegan. Is Captain Vegan a name you'd like to stick? Guys, just so you know, I can tell when Tom has coined something sort of evil that he's hoping he's going to have some legs because he's almost an imperceptible pause and then i see a little smile play at the the corners of his mouth and that's what happened there he said captain vegan and he waited for me to bite there and i didn't and he almost looks sort of

um so guys if you can come in with designs of what captain vegan may look like that would be and he waited for me to buy it there and I didn't. And he almost looked sort of saddened by that. So guys, if you can come in with designs of what Captain Vegan may look like, that would be amazing. We've got some incredible people, by the way, emailing pictures and thus, and I find them very enjoyable. So thank you. They really brighten up my week.

Well, in the interest of balance, there is an email that takes the opposing view. Oh, wow. So first off, great podcast. Love both. You were merging. Successful is one of the best comedy shows in a long time. And Romesh does some stuff as well. Anyway, enough ass kissing. I'm interested to know why Tom gets so worked up and in such a rampant rage about adverts. I'd say adverts are predominantly done by actors, whether they be megastars or people trying to break through in the industry.

They're playing a part, not trying to tell you this is how they live their life let me just jump in here let me just jump in here okay right who's this person so are they anonymous uh this person is glenn glenn so glenn mate completely agree with what you're saying and i have no axe to grind if it's an actor coming in to play a part right and they're playing a part within an advert so if someone comes in and their part is to play a guy who's enjoying an espresso i dig that right that's cool if however it's a multi-million pound superstar who comes into it and it's like hey i'm george clorny and i drink nespresso as soon as you put your name in that advert right that's when that's when the that's when the gloves are off, baby. That's when the whole dynamic changes,

the landscape changes. What if he's playing George Clooney? What if he's playing a version of himself? No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. He's put his name to it. If George Clooney went, hey, I'm Aaron Roberts and I love Nespresso, I'd go, oh, George Clooney's

playing a part. But in these things that we're talking about, he's not, is he? Okay, what if... Is there a loophole in this in which he turns up for this Nespresso advert and he's just referred to as George, but

he might be playing... He might be playing... He might be George Roberts. Might be George Andrews. No, no, no. No, no, no. I'll tell you who's got off very lightly, actually, and I didn't think I'd say this, of this, and it pays me to say it, but someone spoke to me

about this this week. It's Robert De Niro. I look at how young Robert De Niro is going to talk to old Robert De Niro. Like, if you went back in time, if you could get a time machine, one of the first things I'd do with a time machine is go back and say to,

like, I'd go to the set of Raging Bull, and I'd just walk up to Robert De Niro and go, mate, grab ahold of yourself, like, in 30 years' time, because you're doing fucking adverts for bread and Yara's scars. Have you seen that car advert? Yeah.

Yeah. I mean. It's Robert De Niro, arguably the greatest actor ever. And he's dressed up like a hoxton. So listen. I mean, come on, mate. Here's my question to you. Yeah.

Do you think Robert De Niro really believed that he had to dress as a youngster for that thing? It's Robert De Niro. Robert De Niro, I say, is one of the literally like, you know, some of the stuff where he comes out and he's talking about, he's literally the most bang on stuff you'd hear. Yeah, but what I'm saying to you is, in the advert, he turns up

and he's wearing like a hat and shorts and he's like trying to dress up really young and then and he says i'm here and i'm ready it says was it say cool deniro and he says no it's the cars it's the deniro not deniro and then he goes okay now what i'm asking you is do you think that robert deniro really thought that it was cool De Niro and that's why he dressed like that? He'd have to have done because he's put his name to it.

Oh, Tom. Now, I'll tell you what's happened here. Can I tell you what's happened here? You know that you're fucked here, right? And rather than admit that, you're pretending that you're a fucking moron in order to...

Right. Here's how i see that right that is his name right deniro right yeah but but that is his name but he's gonna be a generation of people who are gonna look at robert deniro and they're gonna go oh he's the guy from the war buttons ads he's the guy from that yeah but don't but don't listen don't change the subject when he turns up for that advert as robert den niro he's acting isn't it yeah he's acting yeah yeah he's acting nobody's going there fucking hell i think jesus christ he it looks like he's really the fucking all grasp of reality has completely deserted him we need to get we need to

organize some sort of intervention what people are doing is they're going oh he's acting he's acting and that's despite the fact by the way that he is clearly robert de niro in that because they talk about his name almost exclusively throughout the advert so that is robert de niro oh i'm actually annoyed now because this is what you see you've for once actually got a bit of an argument to this case it slightly frustrates me i've even brought his name into it it's like it frustrates me even more that he's doing that okay so robert de niro i agree with you on the fact that i don't know the thing is though tom i'm sort of loathe to go to go in on this too much because we you and i don't know what our futures hold no no don't get me wrong don't get me wrong like i have no problem with people doing adverts that That's fine, right?

But, like, if an advert, like Charlize Theron does the advert for the perfume, right? Okay. That is an ilk of Charlize Theron. Right. Right? I don't know what Robert De Niro's situation is. I just know that he's someone I respect massively and absolutely adore most of his work, right? Yeah.

So, and, you know, Keanu Reeves. adore most of his work, right? So, and, you know, Keanu Reeves. I guess what I'm saying is, I've probably got less of a problem with, because I like Warburton's bread, right? I enjoy that, so I've really got a problem with promoting it. So that Warburton's advert, you had

no problem with De Niro being in that Warburton's? No, I like that bread. And I can imagine that he actually probably had that bread, and he was like, oh, I like this bread, it's great. This is good bread. Do you think that a fucking, even a molecule of War Buttons has passed Robert De Niro's lips? This is what I don't understand about you.

Mate, I bet any money he was like, you know, on set, someone brings him over a sandwich and he's like, hey, what's in the fucking sandwich here? And they're like, oh, it's like ham and cucumber and a bit of tomato with some basil. And he's like, oh, let me try this and cucumber and a bit of tomato with some basil. And he's like, let me try this.

Has two bites. He's like, that's fucking good bread. That's fucking good bread. Okay. Well, what's become clear here is that when you're happy with the advert, you just engage in some sort of fantasy where the person uses the product. And then when you're not, you get enraged about it. You just pick and choose when it is. I said it.

If I went to George Clooney's house and he had an espresso machine, now I'd shake him by the hand and I'd fucking buy him a pint. In the same way that like Robert didn't, I find it so confusing because the Warburton's advert, I'm almost definite. I probably put five grand on the fact that I bet he tried Warburton's and he probably quite liked it. I mean, if that wasn't a fucking sign of somebody with a gambling problem.

Five grand. Five grand on that. And how do you propose that we find proof? I don't know. No, someone could ask him. We'd have to just find his agent. You get in touch with his agent and go, listen, a bit of a situation. A mate of mine whose marriage sort of rests on on whether you've eaten war buttons or not could you give us an answer um okay how do you feel about this tom go snoop dog doing the

just eat advert amazing adverts because i guarantee i will guarantee i'll give you a tom davis guarantee right that snoop dog has used just Right? And not only is that... What the fuck are you talking about? What the fuck are you talking about? Not only that, Snoop Dogg is all over those adverts. He's literally made them a Snoop Dogg advert. You're not telling me that George Clooney

has written that Nespresso advert. Or in the same way, right? You've actually... No, I'll tell you what you've done, mate. What you've fucking done here... Ah, thank you very much. Because you've dumb no i'll tell you what you've done mate what you've fucking done here ah thank you very much because you've you've dumbfounded yourself because you had you had me on the ropes with this fucking argument and i was genuinely about to doth my cap to you walk away and just fucking cry into the bathroom right okay but what you've done now is you've

become trigger happy you got got too arrogant, right? Snoop Dogg clearly wrote that rap. So what? It's indicative. So what? No, just quick. It's indicative of everything that Snoop Dogg's career has been. It's a cool advert. It's well shot, right?

That advert will tell you that if you have got a grasp of what you're going to do, make it yourself. A lot more than Robert De Niro turning up dressed as a hipster, right? That's Robert De Niro. If you want me to advertise these cars, let me drive around in the car and let me have my own grasp of what it's going to be. I guarantee it wouldn't have been him dressed like that, making an absolute clown of himself.

Boom. I don't really get what point you're making there. I don't think Snoop Dogg regularly uses Just Eat. Of course he does. He's probably in the studio at least four times a week, and he's like, oh, yeah, he's probably got a card with him. He'll send one of his, like, lackeys out and just go, go tell them Snoop Dogg wants a pizza,

and then they'll just fucking go and get it for him. He's in Just Eat. No, no, no, no, no. I bet he's using Just Eat. He's probably got under a different name, like Kevin Watson or something. Well, you know what his real name is, don't you? What?

Calvin. Oh, yeah, I like the name calvin not bad um okay uh thanks for settling that you ready for your next email yeah uh okay this is from foxy wow okay this is a bit of a genuine advice one uh the the question is to both of you you both have a fairly illustrious acting record. I would say that's true for one of us. I've seen you both in many things. Based on this, I would presume you're well-versed to give me some advice in this area, given that you're also

both comedians, one with a background in construction and the other with teaching. I can't think of a single duo more capable of helping me here. That is something about desperate this is. So, my name's Chris, brackets Foxy. I'm a painter and decorator. I never wanted to be a painter, but I sort of fell into it.

I now run a small firm in the Cambridgeshire area. When I was younger, I always wanted to act or be a comedian. Life took control, children came along, and dreams of grandeur fell by the wayside. However, I married a teacher in the art industry. In the arts industry. She's head of drama at a secondary school and is now pushing me to pursue this avenue as she believes I have what it takes. I believe I've become a success in life and provided for my family by working hard and putting in the graft. My fear is that I will go down this road

and won't be able to turn back as I'll be seen as a failure. My most important things in life are my business and my girls and my pipe dreaming, or is this something I could turn into a profitable career and where would you recommend I start? For context, and I've got to be honest, this level of detail I would say is both unnecessary and unhelpful. For context, I'm 6'2", dark hair, 15 stone and a big character. How will I be received in the industry

any advice would be greatly appreciated all the best foxy two freshly cracked eggs any way you like them three strips of naturally smoked bacon and a side of toast only six dollars at at A&W's in Ontario. Experience A&W's classic breakfast on now. Dine-in only until 11 a.m. Today. Something is coming. Kong.

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Tickets at cirquetusoleil.com. The world is yours to create. Echo thanks its presenting partner Sun Life and its official partners Air Canada and Mastercard. So firstly, Foxy, you're a lot more successful than i certainly was when i started out i started this out and also i don't know if i should agree i'd say that i never started doing what i did we do i do now we do now as a financial thing it was never something that i did because uh i thought i earned a lot of money in it and i genuinely believe i think especially with comedy i think that's quite a negative way to come into the industry.

You sound like so successful. Like, genuinely, I would have a real think about it because, yeah, I literally had nothing. I was living on my parents' couch. I had no money and I was pretty unhappy with my life so i did it as a way of just having something else that was just i sort of thought would just bring me a bit of joy and uh i genuinely i don't know what you want i never it was never something that i thought about in five ten years when i had a lot of money from this it was more like that this is you know something i got a lot of pleasure from being on stage

and telling jokes and making people laugh. That was genuinely the only thing I went into it for. And, you know, just listening to your email, it seems like you kind of have got sort of life by the short of curlies anyway. So it is, and when you say about failure and people laughing at you i'd say even now like a lot you constantly failure is going to be literally at the door most days and moments of like like shit what what yeah but then again foxy you sound a lot more rounded and you seem like you've got a lot more self-belief than either myself or Rom is.

So, yeah. Genuinely, Foxy, I might even get your email and start picking your emails for advice because you seem like you've got it all sussed. Yeah. Rom? Well, I do agree with that. I mean, what I would say is, Foxy,

is first of all, I think Tom's right in that you seem to have done very well for yourself. And so I don't think you should... The first thing I'd say is I fox is first of all i think tom's right in that you seem to be have done very well for yourself and so i don't think you should um the first thing i'd say is i don't think you should dismiss that what you've achieved in your life so far it sounds pretty impressive with regards to like but but i was in a slightly different situation to tom when i started getting into comedy because i was a teacher and i was doing all right as a teacher but um the truth is look man it i i don't want to the truth is we tom and i don't know whether you should do this or not what i can tell you is from my point of view when i started doing comedy and i didn't get into to do acting acting is something that came later on but when

i started doing comedy i really wanted to do comedy i hadn't thought of the the end result i haven't thought about the what i was going to get out of it i just thought i really want to do comedy. I hadn't thought of the end result. I hadn't thought about what I was going to get out of it. I just thought I really want to do stand-up comedy. Do you know what I mean? That's where I started. I want to do stand-up. And so I just started doing stand-up. And then eventually I got to a point where I thought,

well, I want to do this for a job. And it would be great if I could pay my bills from doing comedy. That was my only... I just thought this would be fucking amazing if i was able to pay for my electricity through doing this i would like that'd be amazing right and so but what i would say to you and i and i've got a couple of mates that started comedy since and stuff and i've said to them you've got to enjoy the struggle of like you've got to enjoy the hard

bit the shit bit which is trying to break in and trying to get better at what you're doing and practicing getting better at what you do. If you don't enjoy that bit, then I think if your result's orientated, then this probably isn't the thing to do. Do you know what I mean? Like, because it is so unrewarding for such a while. Like, you know, to give you an idea, like we were fucking, like when I went into comedy, I left teaching,

and obviously it was slightly to do with circumstance, but we were fucking like when i went into comedy i i left teaching and obviously it's slightly to do with circumstance but we were fucking broke man like i threw up my part my pipe dream for us into fucking poverty we got our car taken away we couldn't pay the bills and all that and like it wasn't even because i was going into a noble profession i just wanted to talk about my dick on stage you get paid for it do you know what i mean so it's like it's sort of wanted to talk about my dick on stage you get paid for it do you know what i mean so it's like it's sort of look i guess what i'm saying to you is is if um you think you really fucking enjoy it and you would do it you would want to do it even if it didn't make you half the amount of money that you're making now or even a quarter then i think you should do it but if you're thinking i'm gonna do this because i'll

make more money from it and i'll end up being famous or whatever if that's the reason to do it then i'm not saying that can't happen but i'm saying you won't enjoy the journey to trying to get to that place you'll just never be you'll never be satisfied i mean so i don't know i don't even know if that is good advice i kind of go for it if you want to foxy but sort of just um also the other thing is in i didn't realize this comedy is full of rejection nothing is as full of rejection as acting is i mean like also putting yourself putting yourself up for something and then seeing the announcement of that thing and your name's not there it's horrible also to put it into a weird one foxy is that and you're doing a certain you're working in a trade

and that's what I did for for many a year but also the sort of thing is you really only see the people that come through

who have sort of any you know who are on TV or success or a comedy club that you might have paid to go

there's a long long road of like, it took me 12 years to get to this point. And all that 12 years was mostly filled with fucking rejection. And like Rom says, having no money, being skint. You know, and like, you know, not, I mean, I didn't have my own business.

I wasn't in the situation you're in. And I also think, I don't know if you'd agree with this, Rom, that I think sometimes, well, I think if you're in and i also think i don't know if you'd agree with this rom that i think sometimes well i think if you're so financially secure that you can i don't know whether that gives you the same sort of hunger to go out and do what you're doing and and because it takes a lot to you know and i've known ramesh a long time and and myself i've seen a lot of acts but i think when you get the rejection sometimes the lows of this industry, which can be fucking cripplingly low, like horrible.

If you go back and you've got, you know that you're financially secure, you know, I'd question whether you'd even go, why am I putting myself through this? I'd made a decision and I sort of knew that I would just be a laborer for the rest of my life if I didn't make this work for me so it gave me an incentive to go right I haven't got the financial capabilities I haven't

got anything about me that it's either this or nothing now and that's why I sort of threw myself into it like once it became a job and I think I don't know if I'd have had the same sort of push behind me if I'd been able to go right well i've i'm sort of wealthy or i've got this and i've got that but yeah i'd never want to talk anyone out of it but um yeah i guess what we i guess what we're saying is it sounds like we're being a bit negative there but we're not what we i guess what i'm saying is if you want to do it foxy i don't think you've got any worse chance than anyone else and like if your wife, if your other half is, you know,

she's obviously a professional, she knows what she's doing. If she thinks you've got potential, then you have, mate. But I guess what we're saying is it's just hard. So if you're ready, if you're up for doing that, then go for it, man.

There's no reason why you shouldn't. I would say, actually, you've got the main thing that you do need if you are getting into it is a supportive partner because that's the thing you need more than anything

because, yeah, without that, you're nothing. Hope we've helped you Foxy. Good luck. Right. This is sort of directed towards me, Tom, but I wanted to get your thoughts on it, all right? Because it's sort of, it slightly worried me, actually, from being on TV.

You know, it's like I was in a comb when we were doing the email one. Yeah, why is that? I don't know, it's therapeutic, isn't it? I think it's my thinking comb. I, um, so the other day, can I ask you a personal question, Tom? Yeah. What's the state of your pubic hair? I keep them quite low. I keep them quite short. Like a buzz cut, I am. So the other day, can I ask you a personal question? Yeah. What's the state of your pubic hair? I keep them quite low.

I can quite show you like a buzz cut, I guess. Okay. So I recently, um, felt like my pubic area was slightly out of control, right? Yeah.

So she said that they saw you in some pants and saw some pubic hair coming out the top. Yeah. And that's something that, you know, uh, sometimes i think that's quite that can be quite alluring sort of hinting at what lies beneath right but the other day i sort of i just thought this needs a bit of this needs a bit of controlling right so i started looking for possible solutions to this right like as in like i know now that you can get, like, specific trimmers.

Yeah, yeah. And I'm not shouting out, by the way, I know two or three different brands I would recommend, but I'm not shouting them out unless I'm… Okay, fine. Unless you're getting some cheddar for it, yeah. Yeah. So, anyway, so I ordered one. Right.

Okay. And then I said to… This is a… I said to Lisa, oh, do you know I've just ordered a little thing to trim downstairs or whatever. And she went, honestly, mate, her reaction, she just went, why have you done that? And I went, what do you mean?

She goes, well, what's made you do that? I said, I just sort of thought, you know, give myself a bit of trim there. She goes, why have you ordered a trimmer for that? Why is that suddenly bothering you? And then I sort of thought to myself i suppose this does look weird like if you were that way inclined sort of you know if you if you're yeah yeah she must she must be thinking well i've seen your fucking unkempt bush all these years and now suddenly you want to fucking tidy up why what's the inclinate what what is a sudden motivation to do that but i'm just trying to better myself anyway long story short i cancelled the order i don't really i can't yeah because it

was like so you've still got like horrible gangrenous old poop you no no no i've i've trimmed i've trimmed you trim them with scissors or with your beard trimmer and be honest i do not use my beard trimmer okay mate. Okay. I absolutely... Basically, the way you asked that, I know now that you do use your beard trimmer. Just trim your pubes. Listen, if anyone listened to the last podcast with Sockgate, yeah.

So what do you do? You obviously do your beard first and then you go down and you do your bush and then what do you do? You obviously do your beard first and then you go down and you do your bush and then what do you do? You probably use it on my head. But I mean, you've got to bleach that shit, right? Oh yeah, you clean it. You get a cleaner with it, don't you?

Just dust it off. Dust it off and get it to... Blow it off. Get it to go to work on the hairs around your mouth that does taste cheesy okay so this next email, I don't know how we got onto that, but anyway

so, this one's for Romesh I've noticed on various podcasts, interviews etc, that when someone mentions to Ramesh that they know someone who's a big fan his response is generally oh right or yeah now the average person will never know national fame or do anything worthwhile enough to generate a fan base so my awkward question is does fame and recognition get to a point where the novelty wears off and being a known individual with a large fan base is just your normal day-to-day situation and therefore someone being a big fan is just par for the course and slightly underwhelming

i know you're a down-to-earth guy and the question doesn't come from a place of bitterness or hate i've just never sought fame i just listen to podcasts when i'm painting houses but i'm curious to hear your thoughts on this could this be that's two painting decorators in a in a row yeah now here's my question for you, Tom. And there is no wrong or right answer to this. That's from Jerry, by the way. Thank you, Jerry, for your email. First of all, why do you think that when somebody says,

this guy's obviously heard me on, why do you think that when somebody goes, someone's a big fan or whatever, that I go, oh, right, oh, yeah. Do you have any idea why i might be like well i could do a piss-taky answer or i could do the real answer i know the real answer god um is because you have literally uh the worst case of imposter syndrome that i've ever met with anyone i've ever met and it makes you feel agonizingly awkward as soon as anyone gives you even that I was one of your best mates.

If I give you any kind of fucking compliment, you know, and I can say this wholeheartedly to anyone listening, I've been on set with him on many different jobs, jobs that I, and I've turned around and said, oh mate, that was amazing today. Like you blew me away with what you've done. He just, he'll just look so awkward

and either say quite a barbed remark about fucking something i'm wearing or uh sort of like literally i've given romesh a compliment and you'd think that i'd fucking like literally like that he's scurried to his car and just got in and driven off and text me two days later would not be able to even sort of like talk to me two days out and go yeah thanks for what you said that was actually quite sweet of you so it's not from a place of arrogance or the fact that romesh has any kind of thought that he's got like this fucking national acclaim or this national fan base it he finds it agonizing so much so that sometimes i compliment him for stuff just because i know how harsh it is if i want a break from romesh i don't say oh mate i

think we need to take a couple of days break i'll just go i was frankenation the other day brilliant i know that you won't contact me for two days now listen you're saying now first of all um i knew you'd know the answer i knew you'd know the answer but you're exactly the same right i mean yeah yeah yeah i mean you are like we'll be doing like uh you know bearing in mind and i don't want to just sort of i don't want to just say the exact same about you that you've just said to me but the truth is that you think about king gary or something like tom is tom is is has written and is the star of king gary right and then you you watch him after he's done a scene and it's like

he's just done a shit in the middle of the room and it's really ashamed of how he's been made. I feel awkward now as soon as you start talking about it.

I like yeah it's a weird thing and I don't and don't get me wrong I think there are people who I can tell you now who absolutely adore

being being told that they're, you know, it's lovely to hear. Don't get me wrong. It's always a very sweet thing. I think one would agree, but I certainly never, I think as well,

I don't know if you, I never sought fame. I was never, I find fame quite perplexing. I find it quite a weird thing. Like I, like I, weird is, as we were just talking about, quite perplexing and I find it quite a weird thing. Like, I... Weird is, as we were just talking about,

I started this as an idea of trying to make people laugh, trying to be funny. And so the idea of fame is just... I know there's clearly people who love fame, that's their buzz. But I find at times

quite a daunting thing yeah it is difficult but i think like you know it's that thing of going well actually it's a weird thing because for us without you know the truth of it is is that if you've got a higher profile it makes it obviously makes it easier to get work and obviously makes it easier for you to create stuff and like from my point of view you know genuinely the reason i started doing telly is so that more people come and see me on tour you know i did i do panel shows because i wanted people to come and see me on the road and then eventually got to a point where i started making telly because i really enjoyed the shows i was doing and i was doing it for the not for the tour but for the sake of doing the show so

it's a difficult one but the truth is in answer to your question, the reason I said that email worried me is I thought, fuck, that means that's what people think. Do you know what I mean? It's like, is the truth is I find it a bit awkward. I find the word fan also is a bit of a, it's not,

you know, you like following, don't you? You prefer the word follower. I prefer sort of like, we call them the rangers. Do you know what I mean? The trooper people

that would be the end of me and you only because there's no fucking way that I can make my name work but the truth is that I find the whole it's really nice and I'm really glad

and it's great but I find it's just a bit embarrassing that's all there is to it. So, Gerry, thank you so much. Lovely email. Thank you so much for your email. Okay, next email. You ready? Yeah, hit me, boy.

Dear Wolf and Al, a.k.a. Tom Ash. What do you think? I quite like it. It was at one point what we were going to call the podcast. It's a bit embarrassing, actually, because up until maybe the day before the first episode went out, that's what this was called. Tomesh.

Just chatting. But no T in the just. Tomesh shooting the breeze. Tomesh with a sideways glance at the week's events. Reason, baby. Order up for Damien. Hey, how did your doctor's appointment go, by the way? Did you ask

about Rebelsis? Actually, I'm seeing my doctor later today. Did you say Rebelsis? My dad's been talking about Rebelsis. Rebelsis? Really? Yeah, he says it's a pill that... Well, I'll definitely be asking my doctor if Rebelsis is right for me. Rebelsis.

Ask your doctor or visit Rebelsis.ca. Order up for Rebelsis. In today's economy, saving money is like an extreme sport. Coupon clipping. Robo code searching. It takes skill, sweat unless we're talking kudos new phone internet and streaming bundle with the happy stack you can sit back and stack up the savings on kudo internet a sweet phone plan netflix disney plus and amazon prime all

starting at just 99 a month stack more Stack more, spend less. The Happy Stack, only at Coodle. Conditions apply. Go, hit me. Okay. Now, let me start off by saying, Tom, I'm going back through Murder is Successful, such a great show. And Romesh, the Misadventures of series

kept me sane over Christmas, so thank you very much for that. All these shows you're able to watch on BBC iPlayer. Correct. Well, you can still watch Murder is Successful on iPlayer. They're still keeping up there. Yeah, yeah. It's fucking amazing. They've still got the bandwidth. We signed a new deal with the BBC. Oh, you can still watch Modern Success film on iPlayer. They're still keeping up there. Amazing, they've still got the bandwidth.

We signed a new deal with the BBC. Things are going alright. Get that fucking sweet back end of that pocket, boy. Now that I think flattery will get this read out, however, if you're reading this on the podcast it's evident it works. Firstly, Romesh, coffee pods. It's very exciting, this. I use reusable coffee pods.

It's a combination... Reusable ones? Yeah. It's a combination of Tom's ground coffee into a pod, then you tamper down, put the lid on, and pop into the Nespresso machine, then wash and reuse. Therefore, no wastage.

That's exciting, isn't it? Secondly, Tom, I'm also hooked on Married at First Sight Australia. I would love your thoughts on this year's line-up. It seems to me they're going for a more Love Island feel this time around. All the women are very attractive and all the men are very muscly and equally attractive.

It feels like they want to encourage spouse swapping. At the end of the day, I want to see couples like Jules and Cam. Also, it feels like they neglect the rest of the human population. Older people like jewels and cam also it feels like they neglect the rest of the human population older people people of varying size want love too thoughts i completely agree i concur with that by the way the series before i was just literally saying this last night yeah series before had a lot it felt a lot more real this does feel a lot yeah i love jewels and cam big shout out to jewels and cam if either jewels or cam want to get in touch with the show

that would be amazing. I can't follow them on Instagram yet because I don't do it until the series is over, but I will say that I think they are absolutely lovely together. Can I also, so basically, for those of you who are not watching Manifest, Jules and Cam are very much loved up. Now, I don't know, Tom,

based on how you're saying the series is going, I imagine the episode you've got to, Cam has killed jules in her sleep or something but at the moment they look very much in love what i would say in response to this email uh mark in essex is that um it wouldn't the show be really boring if it was all jules and cam yeah yeah it would be yeah i think you know i agree with mark i think there was a better balance last year of people like this, especially where I'm at the moment. I'm guessing Mark is up to date like I am. This week has been like, wow, it just seems like,

is anyone going to make it? Is anyone going to make it? Do you want people to make it? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Do you want them all to make it? No, no. there's a couple of couples there that are just absolutely horrible people okay next quick next part of mark's email yeah i like romish i'm a vegan and i have been for about two years i still to this day get called

get absolute dogs abuse at work for my plant-based diet and often get called names like grass muncher lettuce boy and now just to give you an idea mark of of where tom is on this he's already started laughing as i'm reading out the insults that you're complaining about so so you know so just give me an idea whether whether this is the right place to ask for advice no no no no this is something very place to ask for advice. No, no, no, no. I just don't think they're very imaginative. I think they're quite childish insults. You laughed, though. Yeah, yeah. It wasn't an ironic laugh.

No, but lettuce boy. As a grown man, if someone called me lettuce boy, I wouldn't be like, oh, God. Like, if they called you cow, like the cow or sheep boy. Grass muncher, lettuce boy boy and rabbit tosser are the three sorry mark sorry so you actually enjoyed that and not in an ironic way you really did like rabbit toss is quite funny yeah uh i can usually hold my own these insults and have some but want some wicked comebacks in my arsehole so I can shut them up for good.

Now, I'm going to be honest with you, Mark. I have a lot of this as well, right? And not, you know, Tom is as bad as anyone for sort of insulting the lifestyle. You know, when we're on King Gary, they're kind enough, the production company, to provide vegan food. And when it does arrive, Tom will sort of tap me on the shoulder and go,

look, they've got the spicy carrots for you or whatever it is they've made for you. They've got you some... No, only because we have to pay extra. No, no, no. Every day you're on set, it costs us that little bit more because we've got to get your... And it's not like you're just like fucking any old vegan.

I mean, yeah. You're like, oh, I want the same as everyone else, but just without meat in it. That's not true. I've not made that demand. And then Tom will do stuff like, we'll be on set and it'll be the middle of like,

it's very busy. You know, you're trying to just get on with people and Tom will make an announcement. Just to let you know, guys, the hot snacks are here. There's all the regular stuff and we've got some tofu dogs

for Romesh and his little vegan posse or something like that. And it's just so fucking humiliating. are here. There's all the regular stuff and we've got some tofu dogs for Romesh and his little vegan posse or something like that. And it's just so fucking humiliating. Yeah, but also we hired like three other vegans to make you feel better about yourself on the Christmas special. And do you know one of them said, this is

the worst thing. We did actually get some vegan dogs and we got these nice little vegan pastry things yeah and uh everyone else ate them so we didn't get them i know it's incredible i do i do find that deeply fucking annoying because like what'll happen is it's most non-vegans think that vegan food is shit right and so then what'll happen is something will arrive and then they'll go, oh, I've heard that's, is that actually quite nice then, that one?

And people go, yeah. They go, oh, I'm going to try that. Then all these fucking people go and tuck in to your food and when you turn up and you go, oh, the vegan stuff's all gone. Can I take the sausage out this hot dog for you? And you can just,

maybe just have the bun or something. Let me say, by the way, I've had some vegan patties really, which recently, which are amazing. Incredible. Yeah, I need to give another shout out to Coughlin's Bakery, man. Their vegan game is off the chain. I think you're getting a bit

thirsty at the moment with Coughlin's. What do you mean? You've done it three or four times. Because they're good, mate. What can I say? Also, the other exciting thing that's happened to me, and I'm not getting paid for this this it's not an endorsement crispy cream has started doing vegan donuts man that's that good shit man this is the thing vegans will like you're getting all the good shit now it's like you've been through the tough times yeah you know by the way while

we are being boring and saying stuff um i've spent like three days this week researching steamer hoovers steamer hoovers yeah like hoovers that can also steam your floor as well so what have you found at the moment it looks like vax have got the best one on the market but i would like any advice so and by advice what tom means if there's any by any chance you know somebody that works at Vaxx, could you hook them up with a free one? That is basically what he's saying. Wait, did you get free Tango Blast, by the way? Did I get free Tango Ice Blast? No.

Yeah. There's a picture of you that circulated and quite a few people sent me it saying I was rubbish, got a deal with Tango. No, I went and got a Tango Ice Blast. You know, if you live in Luton, you can get them delivered to your house. I know. I looked it up. You you can get them delivered to your house i know i looked i looked it up you can't get them delivered to my house so i don't live that far away from luton i didn't sort of think if i go but then what would you give for

extra postage and also would the ice blast still be icy by the time it got i don't i don't i don't think when they deliver it tom it's not that it's not posted why are you talking about posted? I know they don't put it in a letter. It's just gone everywhere. No, I got my own ice blast. Nobody from Tango Ice Blast has got in touch to hook us up. So at the moment, if you know anyone at Vax or Tango, obviously Romesh has got a hookup at Coughlin's Bakery

because you've been sucking them off for the last couple of weeks. I've not got a hookup. I've not got a hookup. Okay, cool. This is probably going to be our last one. Yeah. This is from Theo Kerrigan. Wow.

Okay. Hi, Wolf and Al. What are you saying? Episode nine was sick. Just listen. Great crack. Nice one. My name is Theo, and I've always thought it was Episode 9 was sick, just listen Great crack, nice one My name is Theo, and I've always thought it was a bit of a dweeby name No way, no way

Theo No way But listening to Mr Cool Cat Wolf Tom Davis Gas it up so much Has made me back it, you've brightened my life Romesh, did you name your son Just Theo or Theodore? I'm 18 and I spent my life having to

deny being called Theodore because nobody believes it's just Theo. It is. So heads up, your son's going to have to deal with that. Oh yeah, and Alvin and the Chipmunks get that a lot too. Now, this is a thing that I just sort of want to take up with Theo. Now, first of all, Theo, I would say to you that Theo is a really cool name.

So don't worry about that. The other thing I would say, I do slightly take umbrage at the idea that you've been given new belief in the name Theo by the fact that Tom gassed it up on one episode of the podcast. My fucking son's called Theo. I've named one of my kids Theo. And that hasn't given you any extra self-belief at all. But Tom

just going, oh, yow, yow. Listen, my friend. Theo is a great name. It's a name with lineage. It's a name with class. It's a name with power. Love it. Respect it. Cherish it. One love. Because he said that kind of shit.

That's what's giving you the self-release, Theo. Come on, bro. Theo, listen, man. Do not let Romesh fucking quell that spirit that's going inside you right now. That's what I'm talking about. You're fucking fired up, man. Let me tell you something, Theo. Fucking go for it, brother. Go for it.

I don't know what it is to you, mate, but you can accomplish anything with your name and with your new desire you can do it mate, you can do it in answer to your thank you for that Tom in answer to your question Theo, my son's name is not Theodore, it's just Theo

yeah, the true way the true way, what do you mean the true way well Theo is better than Theodore are you Thomas? yeah okay, so when you're bursting it says Thomas Davis you've got another name true way. Well, Theo's better than Theodore. Are you Thomas? Yeah. Okay. So when you're bursted, it says Thomas Davis. You've got another name, haven't you? Do you know why I started laughing?

It's because you're like a pig that's found a truffle. You're sort of sniffing around the root base of the tree. You've got names, but isn't your name like Wayne or Douglas Or something like that I can't remember Something like that

Jonathan Douglas My dad's name's John. He's not Jonathan. You'd never have been able to be a John. You'd have had to be a Jonathan. Why? Your boy Theo can hold Theo.

Very few of us can cut our names down. Yeah. He's not. It's just Theo. Theo, enjoy your name. Enjoy life, Theo, because you fucking deserve it brother yeah you can do anything you want mate yeah uh i'm jealous of you mate you're 18 years old your name's theo all your best days are ahead of you congratulations just fucking go and own it brother and get a t-shirt with theo written across the front of it i wouldn't

do absolutely don't do that. You know what? I'll tell you what. I'm definitely getting you a shirt with Jonathan written across. Jonathan Douglas. I'm just now so annoyed that I didn't call your character Douglas in King Gary. It's the only chance I'll probably ever get to name you again. By the way you were so prissy because we were working on a new project at the moment you're so how was i prissy you were so prissy about your name in that so what do you mean how was i prissy you were prissy

we'll talk about another time when the project gets announced but you i've never done anything like it i must i don't care about script. I want first choice on my name. Okay. Well, look forward to that on a new episode, a future episode of Wolf for now. Tom, what did you think of that bonus set? I loved it, man. I loved it.

There's some sweet, sweet swag in there. Guys, listen, keep emailing in to wolfhowpod at gmail.com. We'll keep doing two episodes a week. Keep it real. And keep it real, guys. And keep it real. That's what I'm saying. Sure, sure. Keep it real. And keep it real, guys. And keep it real. That's what I'm saying.

Sure. Sure. Keep it real. And anything else you can think of from the nineties that you want to use as a life motto, uh, pick your own, uh, take care.

See you later guys. Bye.