Wolf and Owl - Episode 11

Episode Date: February 10, 2021

We’re talking… owning your own style, having a good bedside manner (or lack of), making up new words and hand shakes vs fist-bumps. Plus a dramatic revelation about someone’s age. Oh and just so you know, Tom’s still not oiled his chair. For any feedback, questions or comments please email us at [e-mail] - we’d love to hear from you. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Experience A&W's classic breakfast on now. Dine-in only until 11 a.m. Yeah. Yeah, what you want? Beak or jaws? Feathers or fur? Sharp teeth or feet with claws? Whatever's preferred.

They'll grant you all last requests to steady your nerves. Then podcast the body parts, get severed and served, bring your weak shit, wear the wolf and owler, that ain't just a mistake, that's an awful howler, both of them are known to pull up at your shows, have the crowd witnessing a murder like they rolled in with a gang of crows, fuck their censorship, let them see the whole thing, they stay dressed to kill, never sheep's clothing, dark enough to turn the sun to the moon you'll see nothing all your ears are huff a puff and expect killings red spilling and flesh ripping impressive in it the death bringing his head spinning just kidding every word in this song's about two grown men dressed up as a bird and a dog welcome to the wolf and our podcast um last last uh well not

last episode was it not last episode. Was it the last episode? Which one's the one we had the trailer on? I can't remember. I think it was the last main episode, but this is, no, the bonus episode we didn't.

Right. I mean, look, you know, I know, are you thinking I should do one every week? I mean, I could do like a,

like a rom-com. I mean, I didn't give you any hint that that's what I was thinking, but, but you've, you've run into that but but yes but the truth is the truth is i after you did that trailer thing when james our editor sent us he said i've done this thing with the trailer see what you think and so we i played it on i played it to to lisa and it's genuinely the first thing that I've been involved in.

And I say been involved in. You did it and James edited it. So not really. It's the first thing that she looked genuinely fucking impressed by. She was like, oh, that's great. That's so good. I mean, for me, the trouble is I sort of went in so big it's hard to

hard to ever recreate something like that now it's a bit like when you score like opening game of the World Cup three minutes in

you score an absolute fucking rocket of a shot yeah it's very hard to the rest of the tournament you're fucked absolutely yeah and you're saying that

as someone who's regularly competed in World Cups as well so it's definitely something that you can sort of comment on from experience. I'm saying that as someone who has played

at international level football-wise. Do you know what? It's so typical of you lot doing Soccer Aid. Step up there like you've fucking actually been selected. Because of our prowess. Not because someone in a fucking production meeting is turning around a gun. Wouldn't it be funny

to see Tom Davis play football? Who would be the most, who would be the funniest selection of... Yeah, and you know at some point around that table

someone said, well, we'll ask about Romesh, but no, he's pretty busy at the moment. So next stop would be that big fat guy that he does. Yeah, the idea

that you think you're the next step below me is almost an insult. Alan Carr's busy too? Yeah, Alan Carr. I'm joking, I'm joking. No, Alan. I'm joking, I'm joking.

How are you though, bro? Are you good? Well, I'm good. You know why I'm really good? It's because I saw you in the flesh yesterday. Mate. Which was... How good did that feel?

Well, no, I mean, this... Look, guys, I'm going to get this cleared up. There was a lot of social distancing which was tough for me we've both been tested we both wore masks um may I say by the way Romesh's mask was absolutely drippy it was unreal how cool that Romesh by the way turned up lit yesterday lit hoodie matched the the mask the coolest pair of trainers i've ever seen it they're like the cinder it's like a prince charming that slipped them up on your foot that morning do you know what do you know what it is when it part of the reason for that is whenever i turn up to king

gary for rehearsals i know also that i'm going to have to go into costume to see what nest of fucking shits you've got for me to slip on and so i almost feel like i've got to be extra drippy when i turn up there to sort of keep myself a steam up as i step myself into the next pair of sandals or flip-flops that you've arranged for stewart to wear yesterday yesterday in costume after you left i went in to say oh how was robber she did you have a chat with him about costume and she said um yeah yeah I was just actually looking on a website for him and I looked on the website she was looking at and it was Millets

oh my god I said oh you should try Mountain Warehouse they've got some sort of stuff there but it was nice seeing you man it was lovely to see you and it was very exciting to be doing um reading through the scripts for for the next series of gary um what i would say is part of me when you just said all of that that you just said

part of me thinks for a moment i'll be honest i fell into your trap of thinking that you're actually complimenting me there because i you know when you were sort of you went into it and I thought, God, Tom's really... Mate, I'm almost being really tricky. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. We know what this is about. So Tom's gone in big. Everything is... Now listen, I've got myself in a flat now because of everything that's going on there. So basically, as I've said to you before in this podcast,

Tom is somebody that when he knows there's something good about him, he will compliment that exact thing about you in order to pull the conversation onto himself. Now, that is a regular strategy by the wolf. He does it all the time, right? But like a dickhead, like a naive moron, I walked into...

You were like Oliver Twist at that moment. I walked into the volume... Oliver Twist Twist at that moment. I walked into... Oliver Twist when he first met Artful Dodger. He nicks that bread roll. I was charmed by Tom's compliments about my face mask and my hoodie and trainers. But the truth is, the reason that Tom has talked about that

is because avid listeners to The Wolf of Now... I don't mean that really. That's the sort of thing that people say, isn't it? Aid listeners to The Wolf of Now, I don't mean that really. That's the sort of thing that people say, isn't it? Avid listeners to The Wolf of Now will know that Tom unboxed the fedora on the podcast yesterday. Episode one. Episode one. Episode one.

Now, am I right in saying this is the first time this has happened? Mm-hmm. Let me just tell you how much Tom has drunk his own Kool-Aid here. He's combing his beard as I get into this reveal, right? He's actually started brushing his beard as if he's about to step up and win a fucking Emmy, right, for what I'm about to say. So basically, Tom wore the fedora.

Now, Tom. Yeah. I'm going to tell you this now, bro. I actually felt jealous of you. Really. Yeah. I'm going to tell you this now, bro. I actually felt jealous of you. Really? Yeah, because when you unveiled it on the podcast, I thought he looks really good. It's one thing to look very good in the context of, like,

you're showing it to a mate on a Zoom and, you know, you'd already admitted that you're feeling a bit nervous about it. That's one thing. I don't think i've seen some i don't think somebody in my friendship circle has turned up wearing a hat that that's that that out there you know in terms of headgear because you know we've also we've all got mates that wear caps snapbacks even a flat cap or whatever i like the way that you talk about flat caps like it's the real sort of like absolute flat caps on like you're edgy

like yeah yeah i mean look i know guys who wear snapbacks i also have a friend who i keep between me and you he wears a baker boy no but what i'm saying is what i'm saying is no i know i know but what i'm saying is a baker boy is like yeah that is on the edge of regular headgear i would say do you mean that what i'm talking about the litmus test of turning up to meet some mates with that on, right? If you turn up to meet some mates with a cap, they're not going to make any comments, right? You turn up with a snapback, they're not going to make any comments.

You turn up with a baker boy, you're on the very edge of somebody making a comment, right? You turn up with a trilby, you will get fucking eviscerated, is the truth of it, right? What I'm saying to you is you wore a fedora yesterday and it just looked you owned it it looked like part of your your thing i was jealous the thing about it ron is if i can give you some advice because i can see that you're

you're quivering here but my baby right is when you wear something you've got to wear it up most like you're wearing a sick shirt. That was the first thing I said. And generally that was not to get a compliment back, but you look a dreamboat today, right? That shirt is so cool. Generally, it's the coolest football shirt I've ever seen in my life. Thank you. Thanks very much.

If you were to go out in the street wearing that, though, sometimes I've noticed what you do is you tug at the bottom hem of it a little bit. You're a little bit anxious about how it looks. I have seen you do that. But the thing about me is I just think, I guess it's like when they put a bow on a pig in a competition, you've got like a prettiest, rednecks and hillbillies will go, oh, you know, we'll have the prettiest pig competition. And that pig feels incredible because he's got a bow on.

I think in my head like anything just clothes in general you just gotta own them you know do you think that or i'll tell you what i think i think that when you're paid a compliment you become one of the most disgusting creatures i've ever witnessed let me tell you something right this is a bugbear i talked about it at gary yesterday with you right this thing of like that people are constantly when we get the emails and people are going oh you know lovable tom sometimes you're a bit horrible to some i want you to i want you guys to think about how this went down in the opening of this podcast, right?

First of all, Tom sucker-punched me with a bunch of fake compliments about what I was wearing. No, no, I meant them. You were really cool. Because he wanted me to talk about his fedora, which I duly did, right? Knowing that I was being manipulated, I went into it. And then, drunk on his own sort of praise tom then compares me to a pig

a prize pig wearing a bow and by the way i did the word prize he never said prize he just said pig right i said a pretty pig a pretty pig right so he's compared me to a pretty pig wearing a bow right you all saw you all heard that that's how that's how this guy behaves okay look i'm in that from the bottom of my heart with absolute earnestly right okay um well listen well listen while we're talking about that while we're talking about yesterday's rehearsals which were good which were good fun you did something which i would describe and i'd like to throw this open to the uh to the listeners right you did something um which I would say is on the edge of acceptable okay and that is I was sat back and now Tom you and I are both similar in terms of there are only of the of the I don't know how many positions if

we were if we were posable figures I don't know how many positions you could put us into, right? But I would say of the number of positions that you can put us into, I would say about 7% of those positions are kind of acceptable for human visuals, right? You know, to look at, right? There's only about, if the light's a certain way and you're being looked at from a certain angle, then you might look all right. Otherwise, you look horrendous. Now, that's part of the problem. When I get ready, you look at yourself front on in the mirror, right,

and you go, I sort of look all right. Today, I won't cry about how I look. And then you go out, right? What you don't know is what other people are seeing, and you're not aware until somebody, I don't know, grabs a photo of you. Now, the reason I'm talking about all this is yesterday, during rehearsals, we had a little break in rehearsals, and I went to look at my phone.

And I'm going to tell you this now. I've got an unfortunate seating position, right? And that is that I sort of move my butt forward on the chair and kind of lean back onto the chair. Onto the back of the chair. I would say a slouch, right? A slouch. Now, what that does is that has the the side effect of sort of presenting my gelatinous stomach as some kind of platter you

could i could eat a meal off my own stomach in the way that i sit right you know that kind of disgusting thing that's okay when you're amongst friends and colleagues as i was yesterday. What I don't expect is to be scrolling through Instagram, right, to see on my friend, the wolf's, Instagram story, that picture of me looking fucking disgusting. He was a boomerang,

by the way. Whatever, whatever. But worse. You didn't look disgusting. My thing was mainly, I didn't even see how you looked. I didn't look at it like that. No, no, no.

Okay, but first of all, I looked like that. Tom knew what he was doing. He was like, look at him even see how you looked. I didn't look at it like that. No, no, no. Okay, but first of all, I looked like that. Tom knew what he was doing. He was like, look at him, fucking little fat owl, right? He's taken a photo, and then to fucking volley it home, he's then said, watching old clips of him at the Apollo. Look, the punchline, I thought about, someone messaged me last night, right,

and said, and genuinely meant this, honestly said, does Rom only have three fingers? I was like, what? I looked at the boomerang and I was like, it doesn't look like he has three fingers. You can only see three fingers. Look, I feel a little bit bad about that. Let me just give you some context quickly on that.

All week, there's been a bit of a thing where people have been in rehearsals everyone's got a bit dizzy about the fact we've not seen anyone and it's been a bit like cray cray so people have been doing that laura did it to me laura checkley they're wonderful laura checkley um uh simon's done it you know so there's been a little bit of that going on i've done it to Laura. So that little snappy sort of, you know, which feels quite juvenile, but it almost feels like

sort of like we're teenagers again. We're out and about. So, yeah, I do feel quite mortified. I saw your face and I noticed probably for about an hour after,

I noticed like when our fish and chips and your chips arrived, you looked, you didn't look as happy as I thought you would when I brought you those chips. I was delighted with the chips.

Tom bought me chips. Is this another thing where you want me to tell people that you bought me lunch? I'm just saying. No, look, but what I was like, I was very conscious and I didn't want to say it, but then I thought if I say it in front of the whole room and say, hey, well, I'm sorry about that picture,

everyone might, you know, feel like, and I didn't want you to be painted as a victim there. I know how you can get about that picture. Everyone might, you know, feel like, yeah, and I didn't want you to be painted as a victim there. I know how you can get about that. It's unbelievable. You can't, you can't help yourself, can you?

What? So you've been, you've been doing rehearsals all week basically, right? Yeah. So you're buzzing your tits up. You're buzzing your tits up,

I take it. Yeah. So I mean, I'm very happy, very happy with how how it's going it's nice just to be out and about like you know not out and about because you're sort of just in an office and you're not allowed to leave and uh you know you're under strict strict how do you find the tests by the way that woman's very do you have the tests with that the woman we had the test yeah the swabs yeah i have i've had quite a few of them um i don't i've sort of got used to them now but i think i really do think there's a big there seems to be with these covid tests so for

those of you that don't know i can't imagine there's many people that don't but how it works is swab in the back of the throat and then that same swab goes up either one or both nostrils depending it seems to depend on the testers, whoever they do that, right? Now, when you look, it says you've got a, there's instructions,

like apparently it's got to be 10 seconds flapping around the back of your throat, right? And then you've got to push it up a certain way. It seems to be completely dependent on the medic who's administering it. Yeah. As to,

I swear some of them, they love fucking absolutely, they love getting like, they love pushing it until they get a reaction. Do you know what I mean? So you start gagging or some shit, man. The woman yesterday

came at me with a wooden thing to hold. She went, your tongue's quite, we had trouble with your tongue last time. So she levered down

on my tongue with this wooden sort of spatula thing and then went at my throat until I gagged. And she went, until you gag. So I gagged and she went you've got it until you gag sort of like gagged and it was horrible in front and in front of everyone as well

no like it wasn't personal and the truth is is that i don't know whether that's good bedside you know bedside matter there you know saying we had a problem with your tongue last time i don't think you needed to know that i think i think you think they just pull out the wooden thing and they go, this is what we're doing now. You don't have to say, listen, your tongue's too big for your mouth. That's why we've got to, you know, you don't have to tell the person that, do you? Are these guys like normal nurses where they're trained in bedside manner?

As nurses, do you get trained in bedside manner? I mean, I imagine, and this is, by the way. My mum was a nurse, but i've never i should probably ask her rather than you yeah i would say of the two of us uh the ex-teacher turned comedian or your mother the nurse yeah i think it's a safe bet that she's probably the one to go to but i imagine i imagine they've got some sort of yeah training that but mate we had a mad one right so when lisa is pregnant with our with our with theo our first son right obviously you're sort of you're probably you're much more nervous about

anything during the first pregnancy right so we were like freaking out all the time yeah and you're constantly googling shit and stuff like that so you're on high alert at all times right i just started doing stand-up then i think and I'd entered some local comedy contest or whatever. And Lisa had come with me to the gig. She was heavily pregnant at the time. And then my brother proposed to his now wife, right? So we went... At the gig?

No, no, no. This was like that same evening. That would... I mean, what a... Can you imagine? Now that we're here at my brother's quarterfinal of Brighton Chuckles, I think it's a great time for me to sort of say I love you. And it really would...

What if you get him up on stage to do it? Yeah, thanks a lot. So that's been my time. Thank you, judges. And just while I'm here, Dinesh, get your ass up here. No, so we went back to celebrate, you know, just say congratulations or whatever at my mum and dad's house. And then when we got home, Lisa said,

oh, I haven't felt the baby kick for a little bit. And I said, well, exactly how long? And she said, I'm not sure, but I'm a bit worried about it. So we call the hospital the next morning. Because I said, let's leave it a bit and see and then in the early in the morning she goes to me i'm still i'm just not sure so we phoned up the hospital and said look this is situation i said come in right so we come in and um we go into the go in and then the the midwife at the at the reception goes well when's the last time you remember feeling the baby kick and lisa goes i'm not sure actually i think at some point last night she just went last night

and you're only here now oh god right so already can i just say by the way as you're telling this story yeah i know the end of this story because i've seen theo i genuinely feel sick i feel so anxious right it was so mad so like so when we go in and then they put the um whatever the the heartbeat these like pads so they can you can hear the baby's heartbeat right so they sit lisa down they put the pads on straight away we hear theo's heartbeat okay so a massive relief we're all we're all calm right and then she goes imagine if you hadn't heard the heartbeat and you'd left it this long she said that yeah she goes how would you feel she goes you know you've

got to be careful and then she walked out and lisa broke down into tears man and i just thought this that like i just was like what the fuck man like like i don't understand that i do i'm sort of trying to think to myself what is the logic behind doing that, right? And from one point... There's no logic behind doing that. Yeah, but possibly, you know, if you're giving her the benefit of the doubt here, possibly she's thinking,

I think she's not reacting quick enough to... They're not reacting quick enough to when something comes up. So this is a way of giving her a short, sharp scare. Or tough love. Tough love is the worst love. Yeah, I know. It's the worst love.

I don't know,'m i'm trying to think to myself she cut there's no way she'd be an arsehole i just don't think you work in the nhs sorry man that is look you don't do that and like don't make it like that that's like fucking feels like a like how you deal with shit like that is go look guys seriously like don't feel bad about it because we know this is your first kid but Next time. Basically, you'd always be prepared. Is it precautious? Is that a word? No.

Always be cautious. Take precautions. That's right. But caution, yeah. Air on the side of caution is what I was looking at. Yeah. Right?

Yeah. You know what I'm saying. Air on the side of caution. I know what you're saying. Right? She could have been sweet with that. I get it. Even the first reaction of like, oh, what, last saying? I know what you're saying. She could have been sweet with that. I get it.

Even the first reaction of like, oh, what, last night? That's shock. Today. Something is coming. Kong. Godzilla. They can feel it. Fight together.

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she's back again old old sloppy bollocks here. Doesn't seem to know what she's doing. Can you have a word with her because she just won't listen to me. Anyway, look, very quickly. We're not going into

emails yet, right? But I just want to just off the back of what you just said. Somebody sent an email in about me picking you up on stuff, right? Yeah. And I just sort of want to address this, okay?

So this is from Owen, who, well, first of all, he sort of said that I was right about the percentage thing. Okay. I like the way that you're still... No, no, no, no, but that's not the reason. You know, by the way, just quickly, everyone, yesterday in rehearsals, I did turn around and say, oh, well done, everyone.

You've given it 120%. And Romesh just did this really little like eyebrow move in, sort of like, I thought we'd done this face. Okay. Do you know what I find genuinely sort of impressive, actually, in you? It's your ability to condense so much stank even into like a five-second sentence.

It's like fucking just unadulterated, just pure. Do you know what I mean? You put so much fucking distaste for me, just fucking distaste. It's like a little fucking hardcore shot of Romesh fucking shade

uncut listen I know there's Romesh shade going about have you ever tried Tom's Romesh shade you only did a little bit of it and it will fuck him up mate it's like Bolivian anyway he says in fact mathematically it's impossible, blah, blah, blah.

I personally, this is where he sort of flips on it, right? I personally find it quite persnickety, to be honest. Persnickety is a great word. Well, I'm glad you picked up on that because persnickety is not a word. Oh, really? Yeah, so it doesn't surprise me that this guy's used it in attack on me and you've chipped in to say that you love a word. Oh, really? Yeah. So it doesn't surprise me that this guy's used it in Attack On Me and you've chipped in

to say that you love that word. I think it's just an outstanding word and I will definitely use it at some point. I've literally, first of all, you've only just heard it

and then I reckon, what, two seconds after, not even that, a second after you've heard it, I've told you it's not a word. Yeah, but it sounds cool. It does sound cool.

It is a word because it's a fucking word because it's in an email. That makes it a word. Yeah, but it sounds cool. It does sound cool. It is a word because it's a fucking word because it's in an email. That makes it a word. Okay. Okay. So, is

is is everything in an email a word? Is that what you're saying? Wait, if someone writes something down, it becomes a thing. Right?

Like at some point, right? In the past. Yeah. If I i'd have said oh um and you actually get a labradoodle from what i remember right if i'd said oh yeah um labradoodles and you've gone there's no such thing as a labradoodle there's no such thing as a labradoodle uh and i'd go well no there is because john um hill down the road has like combined a labrador and a poodle and he's made a Labradoodle. Like now it's a thing.

That's what that thing is named, Tom, right? It wasn't a thing. When Charlie, our youngest son, was younger, right? And he didn't know how to write properly.

He wrote, right, instead of his name, F-R-Z-K-L or some shit, right? Because that's the only letters. So are we now supposed to recognise Frisuluk as a word? Because he's the only letters. So are we now supposed to recognise Frazilic as a word? Because he's written it down somewhere. That's now a thing.

Because Charlie invented it. Are you telling me, right? Oh, look, your name's Frazilic now, because that's what you think it is. We're all going to pander to your belief that this is a word now. Oh, look at Frazilic. Frazilic doesn't make any sense.

Persnickety does. If I was to turn around, right? Listen, let me tell you something. Oh, God. And someone said, oh, I love Romesh. She's great. I said, I love Romesh. She's a sense persnickety does if I was to turn around listen let me tell you something oh god and someone said oh I love Romesh she's great I said I love Romesh

she's a bit persnickety they'd turn around to me and go oh yeah I get what you mean yeah they do get you what you mean because it's so close to the correct word

which is pernickety I don't understand why you would insist on just fucking adding pernickety is the word that's the reason you like it you've heard people say pernickety alright you're aware of... Pernickety is the word. That's the reason you like it. You've heard people say Pernickety, all right? You're aware of what Pernickety means,

so you like Pernickety. He said Pernickety, right? Which I arguably think is a better word. Why is it a better word? I think the S really emphasises the Pernickety. Pernickety is like sneaky, right? Pernickety is a little bit like being sneaky. I think it's like the added S

really embodies the word. Okay, fine. But what I'm saying is in a world where you're trying to use language where people, other people understand, you can't just fucking, what is that?

It's a rhino. I think it should be called a runo. That sounds more like what it is. It's a runo. I'm going to call it a runo from now on. You sound like a fucking idiot. Genuinely, what you think you sound like an idiot, if I was out somewhere and someone said that about,

you've just said that. Without lying, mate, and I'm not at all putting this on for effect, I think a rhino actually looks more like a Runo. Please. I genuinely mean that. I genuinely mean that. I've never thought about it before, but at the zoo, I've always just taken it as like,

God basically did all this or whoever did, and they were called rhinos. Someone had to name them. They might have got it wrong. What do you mean get it wrong? You're fucking naming something. You're not trying to... Someone named it.

You can get it. We all just went, oh, okay, we'll just call it that. Correct. Correct. That's how naming things works. Yeah, but why have they got the luxury of doing it? Like thousands of years ago.

It's like we should be able to just go, actually, you know what. Tom, first of all, let me just say something. The first time somebody saw a rhino, the name wasn't rhino. Okay? It was something else. I don't even know who the first person was, right? So now in our language, in English, it's evolved to be rhino, right? Now, the reason you think it's okay that I said runo, right, it's evolved to be rhino right now the reason you

think it's okay that i said runo right because it sounds like rhino what if you suddenly decided that it sounds like it looks like a scratch oh that looks more like a scratch to me and then from then on that doesn't make any sense at all runo doesn't make any sense you've been they feel like runo the reason The reason that people know what you're talking about is because it sounds like Rhino. Do you understand?

Yeah, but then that's not true. Because if I went, oh, that's a lovely field of nows. I don't know what you're

talking about. Exactly. What do you mean exactly? You can't say something. It's like, we know how two

plus two is four. Yeah, well, exactly. It's my point proven. You've got to say, how is that

relevant to the argument? Because if it was a room full of, like a field full of cows, right? And I called them now, as you go, I don't know what you're talking about. But if I went off, look at all those rhinos running towards us.

You'd know what I meant, right? Yeah, I think you mean rhinos, but we're talking about a field of cows, aren't we? I just think that, like, things should evolve. It's a whole percentage thing again okay no but hold on before you carry on i actually do agree with you to a to a point okay i do actually agree with you to a point because the truth is what you're saying is

is a genuine phenomenon because language changes we are constantly getting new words being added into the i totally agree with that and the idea that language gets frozen you know somebody decided at this point that this is what the word these are all the words and you keep using those words and that's where it is and it's never going to move i totally agree with you on that the movement of language i'm totally in favor of what what i'm not in favor of is taking a word that does a job perfectly fine i mean just sticking a fucking letter in it just for the hell of it. Right. So if you've had a business, right, making, I don't know, oat bars, right?

Now, are you talking about oat bars now? Because I don't know. You might be talking about muffins, but you think that oat bars are a better name. Right. Okay. We could say muffins or oat bars. You've got a factory, right? All right.

Okay. And you're doing okay. You're cracking on with it, yeah? Your business is working well enough, but you're not top end. You're not up there with the best of the best, muffin-wise. Sure. Right? You want to hit up the biggest muffin franchise in the world. Okay.

Right? And someone tells you, oh, there's this guy, Peter Clark, who's amazing at doing, like, making muffins. He's got some great flavors and stuff if you add him to your already brilliant like you know business you can have the best muffin business in the world right so you go and get peter clark even though you had a business that worked better and then peter clark comes in then you do have the best muffin business in the world right so when in the case of pernickety if you add the s for me that's an infinitely better word the idea that you would use

in order to explain adding s to pernickety you would use the example of peter clark joining a muffin business for it to become the number one company in the world fucking blows my mind that you would take me knowing that life is finite that you would take me on that longer journey to make that point but the point is made and now you can't really argue with it now i'm gonna be straight up with you tom i actually do think that i do think there's logic to what you're saying i'm gonna tell you that thank you straight off the bat okay so if we can carry on but believe it or not i still haven't read this fucking email right so i personally find it quite persnickety to be honest

and people that feel the need to correct you on things such as this no offense from and more often than not i find intensely trying to wind you up what pisses me off the most is when i'm messaging someone or put a post up somewhere and some random persnickety prick feels the need to tell me you need to put your apostrophe re not your do i though because Do I, though? Because they know what the fuck I mean. I imagine you have two different opinions on this, and we'd love to hear them. Now, basically, this is my take on what, this is from Owen, right?

This is what my take on Owen's saying. I am not the guy to correct you on whether you've put your or your. I couldn't give a shit about that, right? And that is not what I'm trying to do with Tom. Secondly, I'm going to tell you this, right? I am not trying to upset Tom. I'm not trying to have a go at Tom.

I love Tom. He's one of my favorite people on the planet, right? I love that man. And it doesn't matter how many times he makes a mistake. My opinion of him will never change. He's one of my favorite people, right? The reason I'm picking him up is because I don't want him fucking going around

saying persnickety to people, right? I'm just sort of having this discussion with him. Now, there is an argument to suggest that, Rom, maybe if you were really a mate of Tom's and you were trying to help him out, you wouldn't discuss it openly on a podcast. And that is a valid argument, right?

But what I'm saying is I'm not coming at it. We wouldn't have a podcast. No, exactly. But what I'm saying is, what I'm saying is I'm not doing it because I'm trying to have a go. It's just that I sometimes cannot fucking believe the words that Tom uses. And if I can jump in here,

sometimes I'd say like 30 percent of the time romesh has got a point when it comes to stuff and i'm like oh actually maybe that isn't the right thing i said or that word was wrong sometimes you know i and this is what i'm going to say right if you're a maverick owen right a true maverick yeah and you walk between the raindrops like moi don't worry about what other people think straight away brother like i'm gonna tell you now like romesh again i throw that back at him he's one of my favorite people in the world i love a debate with him about things because the way you see the world and different people see the world that's fine like you know we just had a

five minute interlude about rhinos and ronos, right? Okay? Or runos. Was it runos or rhinos? It was runos. Yeah, runos, right? In that argument, we're debating. Let it be a debate.

And also, I'm with Rom, by the way. I will say this about Romesh. My texting to Romesh is foul on the basis of, like, I don't, you know, I've written scripts and I do all this stuff, right? There's a thing called spell check, blah, blah,

blah. But Romesh has never once picked me up on any text that I've ever sent him. Yeah. But we have this debate. That's what friendship is. So, um, Owen,

fight your corner, brother. If you don't want someone to pick you up on it, just say, don't fucking pick me up on it. Or say, it's actually easier to write your than your, you are or whatever with the dash. I sort of agree with a lot of what you've you've said that i would take slight issue with the sort of way that this sort of walking between the

raindrops and making it out like because you use words incorrectly that makes you like some kind of martin luther king figure I find incredible um but okay look look some people right some people just sit so far on the edge that's the edge right and they are sitting on the edge right and some people are happy in the middle conforming and going oh we've been told to talk like this and say these things I'm like mate like let's just fucking think outside the box yes no I know you're absolutely. Me using words correctly in their proper context makes me a real square. I'm really embarrassed. what else have you been up to this week my g well i did uh i did the first episode of the

ranga nation um yeah i recorded that and uh it's so weird man so i'm doing it in the studio on my own right i say on my own there's like there are there are people from the team there but none of the producers are in or or the writers or anything like that right and um the cap there's two camera there's a few camera operators and they're all like they've all got to be locked off and sort of keep maintain social distance so basically i walk in and everybody wants to everybody has to stay away from me because oh really we've got to be safe and so i basically just walk around like uh an outcast wow do you mean like as soon as as soon as i as soon as i walk through a corridor just people just fucking scatter do you mean because i've

got to stay away from me it's mad how do you find that sort of vibe though i'd still find myself getting a bit conscious from it are you but then i mean you're different in a way because you're not that tactile as a person are you i'm tactile i'm not me i'm on someone a little handshake a little fist bump you know i love handshaking man it's one of my favorite things i really miss it i've got to be honest with you i'm happy for handshaking to not come back what this is the thing i don't get with you i just don't get it you're fucking this classicist when it comes to all these different things you sort of like handshake has been around it's like some of the biggest moments in history have been settled with a handshake and now we've you know we i'll tell you what that first handshake which i hope is a really like noble and sort of excellent

one is that will be on tv of like oh you know this is the handshake, which I hope is a really noble and sort of excellent one, that will be on TV of like, oh, you know, this is the handshake that we're coming back to civilization with. I think it's important, man. I just think, like, do you think, why do you think a handshake's better than a fist bump? Well, I just, I don't know.

I just think a handshake, I like fist bumping. Like, let me even push it even further. Yesterday, you had some chips left. We couldn't, I couldn't finish your chips. What kind of society is this now? I mean, I know why we're doing it, but I can't wait to get back to normal. So I could literally,

my dream scenario there was, and I can't wait for that day when you're like, oh, Tom, I can't finish these chips. I'm like, may I, sir? And then you just give me the chips and I shake your hand for it and then just go over

and finish your chips um yeah i mean yes uh that is that too is we share the same dream in that regard i like hugs by the way i'm a fan of hugs i mean i've had the hugs with you one of my issues with handshakes is is that they are they are disease spreading? My other issue with handshakes is I always feel slightly nervous about what type of handshake the person you're meeting wants. Do you know what I mean? Because sometimes there's loads of different things.

There's just a regular handshake. There's a handshake where you bring them in for a hug. There's a handshake where you swoop the hand up and do a little thing. There's a handshake and then a lean in for a kiss on the cheek there's you know there's all sorts of shit and i've just find i find that i actually find it slightly anxiety inducing if i'm being honest really look man the way i see it is like doing

up your trainers isn't it it's like some people do different things with the trainers in the end the best way is to do it classically you know crisscross tiny little little bow yeah that's the but that's the best way. So when it comes to handshake, firm, look the person dead in the eye, little handshake, and then walk away. Right there, there's always going to be differences. There's always going to be changes. Yeah, and this is the thing, you know, I guess the nerves that you have,

you know, you've just got to basically sometimes just get on that surfboard and just fucking waddle it home, boy. Yeah, I will do that. Are you the same level of tactility, I don't even know if that's a word, as Catherine? No, I'm probably more tactile in some ways. Yeah, I'm more tactile than they are. And it's an unpleasant dynamic.

I just made that sound like I'm being predatory to my wife, but what I mean is I like hugs more than she does. Yeah. And if you looked at us, you'd probably say, well, that's massively unsurprising. I don't find that shocking that you want to touch your wife more than she wants to touch you. But it's a weird one, isn't it? Trying to negotiate that difference.

There's nothing, I think, like, sort of like earth-shattering as asking for a cuddle, which in itself, there's no name of it, like cuddle or hug is sort of emasculated and then being rejected for it. I actually get a lot of people message me saying, I bet you're great at hugs, which I don't know if it's to take as a compliment. You are great at hugs.

You're one of the world's great huggers. But you're right, that sense of rejection. And also, the other thing is, is that when Lisa and I were first going out together, we would hug a lot, right? And now I know that all that time that she was hugging me, in her head, she was thinking i can't wait till we get to a point where i could just tell him this ain't this ain't the thing for me

when did she have that conversation with you and she was like i don't really like hugging anymore she didn't she didn't she just started saying things like i'm hot i'm quite hot oh i just i'd hate if a fat asian man tried to cuddle me. You should say it sort of as if she's talking about it generally. Is that why you had the kids? That's why you had three kids so the cuddles could come back. Are your sons cuddlers? Yeah, they are. That's good.

They're big cuddlers. Yeah. Although the eldest one's starting to, they're starting to find, he's starting to find us a bit embarrassing. Really? Yeah. It's a difficult one when your kids start to find you embarrassing

because I consider myself to be cool as fuck. No, I'm with you on this. I remember the moment I was at secondary school, I realised that anyone I'd been friends with at juniors had got cooler than me and i think they dropped me like a fucking bag of old shitty potatoes like that was literally you like even as a kid that rejection of sort of like looking and going oh wow like i'm gonna have to find out a whole new group of friends because i'm not like that coolness has got did you have that or were you,

how were you like at school? Were you like the cool guy? I can remember the feeling and it actually makes me feel sad now of the first day of secondary school, like arranging to meet some people in the playground and them just being all, no, we've got these people in our class now

and da, da, da. And it was a whole new friend group that I wasn't a part of had started and I was just sort of like oh wow I felt like I felt like Don Corleone when he first comes to America in Godfather 2 and he's on his own, that's how I felt

for about the first two weeks of school Mate, I do relate to that a lot I honestly I try and talk to my kids about what it's like what their school life is like now and it sounds like i think the values are different but it's still hard to be a kid trying to find your way in school do you mean but i i i was like when i was very young i was just massive like fat so fat right yeah so fat with a lazy eye i just don't think you can be one of the cool kids when you look like that it's impossible do you mean you can't because other kids are looking at you going why would i i know this

sounds horrible but other kids are like they think like this they're just like why would i why how could he be one of the cool kids how could he be someone that he'd want to hang out with do you mean and so then and then i got then i lost a bit of weight and got a bit slimmer as i went into secondary school but i do think it still got better a bit later on because i think lost a bit of weight and got a bit slimmer as I went into secondary school. But I do think it still got better a bit later on because I think being fat, having a lazy eye or whatever, it then means that you compensate with like chat and stuff. Do you know what I mean? So that's sort of, it's sort of almost like training.

Do you know what I mean? You start kind of being able to be in conversations. But being one of the cool kids no i wasn't i wasn't ever one of the cool i remember at school being uh i think it was like when we first started secondary school and uh ninja turtles were still sort of i mean we're a similar age right ninja turtles are younger but ninja turtles are still a thing and uh i remember sort of saying to a guy that i've been friends with at junior school about like uh oh, yeah. Before we carry on this, because you throw little things like this, unchallenged, and people believe them. So how old are you? 41.

Right, so I'm 42. Okay. I thought you were like 46 I swear someone told me you were 46 are you shitting me now I swear I've thought all this time that's why I've made the jokes about it

I've always thought you were 46 obviously not always 46 I thought when we first met you were like 38 but now I think you are so hold on all this time you've been talking to a man that you think is 46 years old for this last yeah i didn't know you were only a year old hold on hold on do you know this changes the fucking whole dynamic of our relationship yeah but for me a little bit more

because i've looked at you as a senior fucking figure who would have been leaving secondary school when I joined. Like now I look at you and think well actually all this stuff he's saying he's only one year more experience in life than I am. Tom, Tom, Tom this is fucking this is blowing my mind there.

Did you really think I was 46 years old? I swear I thought you were 46. I've even told people you're 46. Are you genuinely fucking with me? Are you only 42? What? First of all, 42 is old, right? Secondly,

I just can't, honestly, mate, I don't know how to fucking deal with this. So all this time you're talking to me, all this time we've been mates, I've been under the impression that you see me as like a mate on your level but now you see me

as some sort of what fucking uncle or something no I'm not an uncle I've got other friends who are sort of your old age you're 46

it's not my age you've got to get that out of your fucking head it's not my age I can't believe this I think this will make us closer the fact that there's only a year in between us

because I've been sort of like yeah so references that I've been talking about, like, you know, that you talk about. So sometimes you've been referencing stuff and you're going, this old fart won't understand what I'm talking about. Mate, if I'm honest with you,

I've genuinely thought, fucking hell, it's mad that in four years it'll be one of my shit 50th. It's so, how mad? Mate, I'm just, I'm fucking spinning out here. I'm spinning out. This has put a different complexion on every single interaction

we've ever had. It's more worse for me than you. How is it worse for you? How are you the victim in fucking assuming that I'm four years older than I actually am and fucking telling people? For all I know, you might still be saying that to me because you go, actually, do you know what?

Rom says he's 42, but I think he's better as a 46-year-old. So that's what I'm sticking with. No, I would, look, if I'm honest with you, sometimes I've told people, say, oh, Rom says he's 46, but I think he handles himself more than the 35-year-old. But, like, I genuinely, now I'm like, oh, fuck it, there's a year between us. I genuinely now I'm like oh fuck it there's a year between us

I don't want to drop the person here I'll tell you off air who told me you're 46 wow I don't know if I can continue doing this record oh my god

you feel that not sideways by it yeah like you like you like I just I think when somebody's a bit older than you

you think about them in a different way I've thought of us like like I can see you like a, you know, like you're a brother. We're on a level. We're the same age. And now it actually turns out.

I just thought of you like an older brother. Yeah, I don't want you to think of me like an older brother. I don't like that. But you'd be my brother. Like, when I started school, you were just about leaving and sort of taught me the ropes. Look, I just, I can't, I can't, I can't, I don't know what, I don't know how to feel now

listen don't worry about it don't think about it too much you actually you've come out it's better than i am i've got to get my head around so much stuff we all have the power to shape the world we're connected to the world we share to each other i am. I wait in the world of Echo. Discover the extraordinary with Echo, the spectacular new show by Cirque du Soleil. Opens May 8th under the big top at Toronto Lakeshore Boulevard West. Tickets at cirquesdusoleil.com. The world is yours to create. Echo thanks its presenting partners Sun Life

and its official partners Air Canada and MasterCard. In today's economy, saving money is like an extreme sport. Coupon clipping. Romo code searching. It takes skill, speed, sweat. Unless we're talking Kudo's new phone, internet, and streaming bundle. With the HappyStack, you can sit back and stack up the savings on Kudo Internet, a sweet phone plan, Netflix, Disney Plus, and Amazon Prime.

All starting at just $99 a month. Stack more, spend less. The Happy Stack, only at Kudo. Conditions apply. Whoa, what are you listening to this for? Wait, who's talking? You know you're driving a 2024 Ford Escape with available Alexa built in, so you can change the music. Oh yeah, Alexa, change station to 99.2

see purchase a 2024 escape st line all-wheel drive with tech pack at 3.49 apr for 72 months with down payment that's just 267 bi-weekly cash value of 40 294 plus eligible ford owners get a thousand dollar bonus for details visit your local ford store or ford.ca how you've all this time when i've gone when i said benjamin batten you've got five years back okay first of all it's four all right secondly your perception of how old i am isn't the general barometer that unless you've told everyone right okay thirdly all these times i've said stuff to you like you know like how self-conscious you are about appearance do i look all right do you know what you're looking quite young for your age actually the truth is you could mean i'm looking two years older than i actually am

do you get how fucking huge this is it's mad yeah man it's met mate all these things that we've talked about i didn't realize that it was just like literally, I mean, when's your birthday? 27th of March. So you're literally like, so you're 42 this, you're 43 this year? Yeah. Yeah. I'm 42 on April the 27th. Oh, fucking hell. Like, nearly exactly a year older. A year and a month older than me. It's insane.

I just can't. You've just been sitting here every, all of these, why has this never come up before how do we not know how come i know how old you are you don't know how old i am i don't literally i don't know i i took it that also like guys of your like fake age right sort of don't like talking about the fact they're over 45 it's a massive thing yeah but it but I wouldn't know. I'm not over 45, Tom. Yeah, but that's what I mean. I didn't want to mention that I was over 45. Right, listen. Tell me the name now.

We'll bleep it out. Who is it? What a piece of shit. I swear. That's because that's how he is. Yeah, I know. It's mad, isn't it? I swear he said at some point he was the same age as you. Oh, God. I feel sick. No wonder you're right with me being called the owl the whole of the whole of the cast of king gary think that you're 46 why

first of all if you find out my age why would you what why would you go around and tell everyone well you know you have that conversation about how old everyone is we just haven't had that conversation together how dry has the chat got on on the King Gary set that you'll start discussing how old everyone is? I think, no, I was like, da-da-da-da-da-da, and someone was like, oh, how old's Romesh? I'm like, 46. 47, sort of, this year. At one point,

when we were talking about having COVID vaccines, they were like, when's Romesh going to get his? Like one of the oldest statesmen on the show. It's... No, it's like... I do feel bad now. I feel like we've gained something special though. I feel like we've really lost something there today. Yeah, but look, this is the difference.

You are half empty, I'm half full. I look at it and I think, wow, like, you know, I've been looking at this guy in such a different way. And it is, age is so important. You've been put a few years back in school now. But you were the older kids and now you're in my year again. That's pretty cool. Yeah, yeah, because all kids love to be the kids that are held back.

So what happens, I've been held back four years and then I rock up to class. And you're like, aren't you four years old enough? Shouldn't you be, like, leaving now? And I go, no, I'm in your year now. Oh man. Look mate, we've been,

that has thrown us off here, right? So do you want a few emails? Yeah, let's do a couple of sweet emails. Okay. This is from Big Tony. All right. Now Big Tony, uh uh is asking us a genuine thing but he does also take time to throw in a little

uh bit of abuse at me okay so here we go uh hi rob and tom um after a bit of advice lads i was with my ex for seven years and we've been split up for the past three but we keep meeting up now and again seems like we're never out of each other's minds the relationship wasn't the best towards the end but the bedroom was always exciting i mean i had boundaries but she was like chris gale in a t20 match do you know what that do you know what he means by that no i've got no idea what it means chris gale was like very excited very exciting batsman okay just smashing it over the boundary all the time like the ultimate warrior in wrestling yeah yeah she, she pegged him now and again. Anyway, I've been thinking I need to move on,

lose a bit of weight and get myself a fresh start. Or do I just bite the bullet and try things out with the X? I was going to try going vegan for a while, but that hasn't worked out the best for Rom. So, Tom, you've been working out... That's a real two-fitted challenge. I know. It's incredible.

As I was reading it, I was really as I was reading it I was really surprised by it it's sort of like this is quite he's after a bit of advice and then he just puts in this absolute

fucking smash I've not been so insulted since one of my very best friends thought I was four years older than I actually am also tried my hardest

with the grammar in this because I know ron would rip it apart anyway love the show lads never stop laughing keep them coming stay safe and all the best big tony so i guess i guess what he's asking is his request for advice is twofold here tom yeah um first of all he wants to know about your weight loss tips secondly um should he get on with should he get should he uh should he try things with the ex now before you get into this tom because uh you you will i'm sure you will have some good tips it it sort of implies here that he's either good he's either going to try and lose some weight and go and find someone new or he's going to get together with his ex and then just not bother with any of that,

which is like a weird set of decisions. I think, if I'm honest with you, you can deal with both bits of advice with one really good bit of advice, which is do you. You just genuinely, whether it's you get back with your ex or you are going to... Your face, Ron, by the way, the way is this is going to be the best

advice this big tony ever has okay right do you don't even think about uh whether you get back with her or not number one my uh weight loss thing has nothing to do with anyone about apart from myself and my constant worry that i'm about to have a heart attack or drop dead in the street with heart disease because it's run through my family so that should be your main concern not whether you're gonna sort of like go on the prowl and pick up more ladies it should be the fact that you want to do it for yourself to be more healthy and let me also by the way say um i have on romesh's behalf and romesh having talked to me a lot about vegetarian and vegan cuisine uh i've uh i do have like i'm have, I'll have a curry tonight and there'll be no meat in it.

I won't have anything with meat. I'll like, it will actually pretty much be a vegan curry. I won't even have any paneer or anything. So what you're saying is, is that as a result

of your friendship with me, you're having a curry. No, no, no. As a result of your friendship with me, I've inspired you to have a curry tonight is that what you're saying no no no no don't start getting all this mate because i'm not getting anything i'm saying that's what you're saying you inspired me to have a vegan curry tonight i've been having curries a lot longer than i've been friends with you my old 46 year old friend

right but what my point was and also may i quickly say as well i saw romesh yesterday and the picture that i put up is very deceiving because he looks in incredible shape he does look good he looks yeah and i'm not this is not me saying it for any other motive but i do know that he struggles as i do with people saying stuff about your weight and stuff and i think it is very harsh to say that and you know none of us are bulletproof and Big Tony I think you probably you know listening to your email I'm going probably you've been called Big Tony for the same reason

I was called Big Tom apart from being tall I was a massive yeti of a man with a massive gut which a lot of people find hilariously funny but is a constant bugbear of mine because I worry that that is going to be very much the thing that kills me so I think Tony this would be my advice uh lose weight whatever do that for you though and do it for your own mental health and your own well-being but also if you keep on going back to this woman

and you think that there is something there that's more than a sexual fricassee then I can't even I'm not even going to go on you're not going to unpack that no I think I think try and try and just get just like

having watched a lot of Married at First Sight and taking on that advice and I think it's a good program for you to watch Tony is try and get it out just out of the bedroom a bit try and make it a little bit

just different from that and if you still haven't got any basis then walk away my brother you know bid her farewell and go and find out of the bedroom a bit. Try and make it a little bit just different from that. And if you still haven't got any basis, then walk away, my brother. You know, bid her farewell and go and find another dame. I'm going to tell you now, I thought that was exceptional advice.

It really, really was good. I would sort of, I mean, what I'm saying now is I'm fully aware that I'm sort of just repeating what Tom says, but I couldn't have agreed with him more, really. The the truth is is that your weight loss and your relationship status should be uh completely independent of each other you know

if you want to if you want to lose weight and you want to get in shape you do that for you when whenever i'm talking to lisa about because occasionally i have a thing where i look in the mirror i'm wearing a certain top and i'll go um I'll go, should I, you know, am I starting to put on weight? Do I look awful? You know, should I try and lose some weight? Lisa's answer to me, and I'm sure Catherine's answer to you is, if you want to, you know, if that's going to make you feel more confident, do it. And the other thing is, the reason I'm losing weight, same as Tom, is like health reasons, man. I mean, I think that this, my days of trying to get in shape of vanity, I've accepted that that is not in my future.

So like, so listen, the truth is Tom's absolutely right. I'm echoing what he said. If you want to lose weight or whatever, then do that. But that is, that should have no connection with whether you get back with your ex or not, man. See what you think. Good luck to you, Big Tony. Yeah, Big Tony. From one big guy to another.

Go easy. Go fly. Okay. This is from Steve Cummins. All right. And he says, Hi, chaps. I've been enjoying your podcast over the past few weeks while walking the hound.

At a few points, I've had to stop and take a breath and stop as I've been laughing so much. Thank you very much. Cheers, thank you. There have definitely been some highs and lows along the way, but the question I have is this. If you guys are such good friends, and by the way, this is very pertinent, this email. I picked it out beforehand,

but with regards to what the fuck has gone down today, this really is a good one. If you guys are such good friends, then why have you never visited each other's gaffes? I understand has a shit phobia but by the sounds of things the big man is well up for it and it has more than one shitter could be a cracking podcast for the future regards steve now it's a good question though isn't it this is what i think all right is that i think because of the jobs we do and just how we end up seeing each other and all that shit. And also how times we're on. I don't think going to each other's houses is a thing that friend that happens

as much in friendship as it did before. I mean, I like, I just think, I don't know if it's like partly because of the, the, the industry that we're in. Well,

I see you, obviously I see your work. I chat to you all the time. And whenever we see each other, it'd be like, we're out. Do you know what I mean? We're out at a party or a wedding or whatever. Not a wedding, makes it sound like we only meet once every 15 years. But do you know what I mean?

Like, do you know what I mean? It doesn't feel like a house thing is a thing. We don't live that close to each other. So I think if I lived in the, you know, next village down or even a county away, there would be more chance that you and Lisa would have popped over for a bite to eat

or whatever or me and Catherine would have come to yours. I think the fact is that we live, it's a big, big move. On the basis, me and Rom get on

really, really well, right? Very well. Our wives, I'm sure our wives would love to sit together and bitch and moan about how it irritated me and Romesh are and they believe they have got a lot in common it would literally probably be actually like a therapy session for them both because they both had the same

problem of dealing with two very anxious men who are constantly worried about what other people think of them but it's a big move for either of us. If Romesh said to me and Catherine, oh, yeah, come and stay with me and Lisa, we'd have to stay over for the night. There's no, you know, and likewise for Romesh and Lisa. So that's a big move for us to do. It's not just a little pop round.

I mean, I'm genuinely thinking about moving house just so I can pop round to Romesh's a bit more. Okay. Not something we've discussed. Yeah, no, I'm just saying to you. I mean, look, guys, I'm going to be honest with you. Sort of everything has changed a bit in this this this podcast you've been privy to sort of actually

genuinely like a sliding doors moment of our relationship like the guy that i knew like you know the guy that i knew going into this podcast was this sort of worldly man who sort of like had sort of five to six years on the planet longer than I did. And, you know, I come out of this knowing that I've got almost a twin. It's four years. It's four years in your head. It's actually one year. Yeah, yeah. And now I have to question everything of like how, you know,

is he just more learned than me then? Is he just, you know, did he pay attention more in school than I did? So all this time, like you've been thinking things like, oh, the reason he knows that a rhino is called a rhino is because he's four years older than me. I always respect my elders. That's one of the two fucking moral compasses. Just fucking fuck you.

But on what you're saying, and I do think it would be an amazing podcast that we could do from each of our houses. Listen, I'll tell you what. Should we do it? Yeah. Lockdown's over. We'll do a podcast from Rom's and we'll do from one of each of our houses. Listen, I'll tell you what. Should we do it? Yeah. Lockdown's over. We'll do a podcast.

We'll do a podcast from Rom's and we'll do a podcast from mine. Here's what I'm suggesting, right? Now, we might not do it exactly like this, but this is how I think it could go down, right? You and Catherine come to mine, right? Yeah. Stay over.

You and I do it. Wow. Yeah. Wow. Yeah. Do you know what? Wow, man. That is the biggest invite of that's like

me being invited to the royal wedding no but this is what i'm saying right we do we do we do you come over right yeah have dinner at the beginning of the evening or maybe midway through we you and i step out and and do the podcast do do the first half of the podcast and then before you hit the road the next day we do like a reportage of how it went down like the the next one i think that's how we do it amazing i think let's do that and then we could do like a month down the line we do it where you come to mind yeah perfect or maybe two months or something let's just see how it goes uh right tom my g do you want to uh do you want to do the thing that many people are describing as the highlight of the podcast for them which is both really complimentary to the podcast and

deeply also deeply insulting to me but tom take us out brother yo how you built how do you frame goal look at yourself right are you you because of you what makes you you is it the fabric of your personality that has been welted and molded over the years through schooling and bad relationships or are you you because of a physical thing maybe you just because you're big and you're big boned and you're carrying a little bit of timber but you've made that your identity maybe it's your age that can make you feel the way you do make you more senior there's nothing like like peeking through the curtain and pulling back the blinds and saying once upon a time i I used to be 46, but I'm actually 41. I used to be Big Tony, but now I'm Little Tony.

The you that we will love and we will always cherish is the you that circuses around in your veins and in your core. And that is the truth of life. You'd just been schooled, babe. That really was. I think even you were surprised by the way that you opened that. I think that was. I think even you were surprised by the way that you opened that I think that was I just know that was my that might have been

I don't know where that came from it came out so much different in my voice than it was in my head you are the you that's circusing

in your veins that's beautiful beautiful chat man yeah Tom D thank you so much brother Romy Rowe love you baby

and let me just say I love you at 42 like I loved you at 46 darling thank you so much really couldn't mean less this has been the Wolf and the Owl peace out

if you have a problem opinion feedback or anything at all please email us at wolf al pod at gmail.com that's wolf al pod at gmail.com we'd love to hear from you mainly because we don't have any content ideas thank you