Wolf and Owl - Episode 45

Episode Date: October 13, 2021

We’re talking… morning hair, dangerous dentists, making movies and meeting film stars, takeaway splurges, charity marathons and the many parts of Tom’s heart. Then it’s email time with a few questions answered on veggie recipe inspiration and a flatmate quandary. For any feedback, questions or comments please email us at [e-mail] - we’d love to hear from you. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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ripping impressive in it the death bringing his head spinning Just kidding, every word in his song's about two grown men Dressed up as a bird and a dog Welcome once again to the Wolf and I podcast, up in your earpiece Yes, yes, yes, this is, well, to give you a bit of context It's twenty past seven in the morning, arguably too early To be recording a podcast, I would say You look good though boy I love that

side quiff you've got this is what my hair looks like in the morning you like it? man I'd love to have a situation where I could say

this is what my hair looked at any other time but it literally it looks the same no matter what there's no change you know like sometimes I just

enviably look at someone who just shakes their head like, you know, when you see them going for a walk and they've got a bit of length on their hair or it's raining

and someone just sort of like breezes their fucking dew and drops off their hair and I've just stood there with my baldness. Yeah, but do you know what? You look consistently sexy.

That's what's good about you. You know? I see you. It must be so nice to be your wife because you look as hot as you always do every single day. You're consistent. You bring the heat every day. That's what I like about you.

Until I open my mouth, my teeth are getting so bad. Your teeth? What's wrong with your teeth? By the way, just so you know, guys, Tom's eating a cookie. He made the maverick decision to start eating as we started recording. Literally pulled,

literally picked a cookie out of a jar as we started. Right. At 20 past seven, this is my breakfast. No, my teeth are at the bottom. They're getting more and more gappy.

I thought you were getting some Invisalign or something. Invisalign. Yeah, I need to get on that fucking flex. Massively. Have you had it done? I'm doing Invisalign at the moment, yeah. How. Yeah, I need to get on that fucking flex. Massively. Have you had it done? I'm doing Invisalign at the moment, yeah.

How are you finding it, boy? Because I've got this little tooth down here that's really crooked. I've got some crooked teeth. Yeah, mine are gappy. Well, I didn't think I had. It's one of these things where I didn't think I had until the dentist pointed out.

He got like, look at this. It's mad that they took you into that because obviously you're a fair dentist and teeth well i'm with a as you know i'm with a very a very caring dentist it was uh yeah it's sensual and friendly not sensual not sensual just caring and can you do me a favor what text your dentist and see if they can get me in as well. Wow. Wow. Okay. Okay. We've got ourselves an air fryer turnaround here, guys.

This is a guy that when I first announced I was going to a gentle dentist, mocked me, vilified me, encouraged listeners to email and tell me what a piece of shit I am because of it and now no listen look what we have here listen listen listen to me right when it comes to dentists mate i'm on the front line i don't care then i would if there was someone called the danger dentist i would go there why would you do that no that's insane yeah no but i would go there and go all right you're dangerous y'all yeah do you like i'm ready to lay back and just do your work and you come out and no worries that's insane yeah no but I would go there and go alright you're dangerous

yeah do you like I'm ready to lay back and just do your worst and you come out and you go didn't get me with like a gappy

little fucking smile half your teeth missing taught him a lesson no I'm like the Bear Grylls or the Ant Middleton of teeth right

I'm like what does that mean well you know like with dentists I'm like I literally am like you know like when you get these mavericks like foxy or whatever yeah who looks look at a mountain and me and you would be going oh fuck you know that's a big mountain and he foxy looks here and goes

fucking stupid mountain and then literally puts a blindfold have you met foxy because it isn't talked like that at all well all right yeah well we did we did really a league of their own road trip a lot most of what he said in fact i'd say all of what he said was kind of just made sense he wouldn't he wouldn't look at a man's stupid mountain like i can't imagine he's got that in his locker really okay maybe and would say that right so yeah and i mean and with 100 so much right he'd go he'd fucking, I'm about to go kick that man in the cock and then put it into a headlock and bring it to the Gret or something like that.

He'd say something like that. Yeah, exactly. Right. And that is what I'm like with dentists. Yeah, but what, that doesn't make any sense. What does that mean?

So what, you go to a dentist and beat him up or something? What does it mean? No, it means I go to a dentist, I look them in the eye and go,

I, I will trust you with my teeth, right? But let it be known that I bring fire as well. And, you know... And then they go, hurry up and bring out the sedative. I need this to go to sleep urgently. I don't have the fear that you... Yeah, just say that. Why can't you... This is the point I'm making just fucking say that

bro just say I'm not scared of dentists if I'm the bear grills of dentists I'm the ant midget of dentists so if somebody's looking at a mountain I'm not scared of dentists so you're not scared of dentists and you've decided to say that in a braggy way once again mocking my

issues with dentists no no because you're comparing yourself to bear to say that in a braggy way, once again mocking my issues with dentists, right? No, no, no. Because you're comparing yourself to Bear Grylls and fucking Ant Middleton because you're not scared of dentists. Implying that because I do have an issue with dentists, I'm the opposite of that.

You're putting yourself in a very bad position, let me just warn you, Mr. Wolf. You're in a lot of trouble there. Mr. Al, can I just say to you before you get upset, right? Hopefully, didn't let me listen more on you Mr Wolf you're in a lot of trouble there Mr Al can I just say to you before you get upset right right

hopefully right when is the moment you see like Bear Grylls and Ant Middleton shine right when it comes to

like walking no walking across like fucking ravines and stuff sure right

is when they fucking turn to like Anthea Turner or like Vicky Patterson and they say, you know, or Toby Anstis or whatever, and go, you can do this.

And they're terrified. And then they show them how to do it. And then Anthea Turner goes across the ravine and is like, I fucking did it. I did it. That metaphor only works if you go to the dentist with someone else and encourage them through the treatment

that's the only way that makes any sense we could do that together I'm just saying you could be my Anthea Turner and I'll be Anthea Turner absolutely not want to be your Anthea Turner but I will so why are you coming to this dentist then my special dentist

you've said nice things about it they're lovely and I do think you've said nice things about it. Very lovely. They'll look after you so well. And I do think, look, I'm 42 now, right? And it's like,

maybe I've just been fucking dancing with these dentists and fucking flying about. Maybe it's not, it'd be nice to go to a dentist and go, and relax and just smile and sort of like,

you know, lay there. Yeah. Can we tell people where you are right now? Because you're living that bougie life right now, aren't you? No, man. Listen, I'm fucking... I don't like to say the word second home

because it makes me sound a douchebag, but I'm in my second home. So far. And by the way, if second home so far and by the way if second home means somewhere that you visited about three times then yes

absolutely absolutely smashing it you're at your second home so high farmhouse no I've I've come down here a little couple of nights away some serious filming

happening this week and another a new project to throw into the mix with the other we're not allowed A little couple of nights away. Some serious filming happening this week. A new project to throw into the mix. We're not allowed to say what it is, are we? Yeah, I can say that I'm filming it. Actually, do you know what? This is a little thing I've got. So I'm filming a motion picture, a movie, a film.

Before you carry on, before you carry on, I want to tell you this now, because I forget to tell you this again, because I forget to tell you this again, and if I haven't told you this before, I am so fucking happy for you, man, that you're doing this. Thank you, brother. I'm proud of you. I know it's not down to me in any way, shape, or form. I'm so

buzzing for you, bro. I hope you absolutely smash it. Anyway, carry on. Go on. I love you, my man. I'm looking to you now, and I'm just like, you're not my Anthony Turner. You are my Foxy. If we were going to go into battle side by side, it would just make me feel so much better.

I don't... Everything doesn't have to be a war metaphor. We could just go for lunch. Yeah, true. True. Right. So, I'm filming Wonka. I start filming Wonka this week.

Yeah, I've been reading about it. Sounds pretty sick. Yeah, but have you seen, so there's a thing in the paper yesterday. It was like Tom Davis and Matt Lucas start filming Wonka. There's a picture of Keegan-Michael Key on that. Who's in it, right? Yeah, yeah, but they said that I'm Keegan-Michael Key. that. Who's in it, right? Yeah, yeah, but they've said

that I'm Keegan-Michael Key. Oh, no. Oh, no. And do you know the most offensive thing about that whole thing is Keegan-Michael Key looks very overweight

in the picture, purposely. Oh, no. He's in a basin, like, yeah. So, they've assumed, because Keegan-Michael Key is a very thin guy.

He is very thin, yeah. When you meet him. By the way, shout out, because Key and Peele is one of the greatest shows. Key and Peele, do yourselves a favour right now. Just start watching some Key and Peele. Although, did you see Dave Chappelle? Did you see the Dave Chappelle accusation on his last special?

No, I haven't watched it yet. No, no, no, on his one before. I can't remember which one it is. Maybe Sticks and Stones. He basically accuses them of I don't know why I'm even mentioning this but I was really surprised by it

he basically sort of insinuates that they ripped him off but I've watched the Chappelle show and I've watched Key and Peele and I get

that they come from the same world but I wouldn't say rip off that's like what they've done is they've made a sketch show and he made a sketch show I but that's that's like what they've done is they've made a sketch show and he made a sketch show i know that's true it was just that of the time

uh his was very you know shot glossy and there's just shot glossy i mean i think kean pill for me is maybe out there with the fast shows the greatest sketch over oh my god it's so funny they nail they nail observations so well there's one where it's such a simple idea well first of all the big one that went massive is the what the supply teacher you know the substitute teacher and the liam neeson one yes the what the the other sketch that i love which is a really simple one it's like they were just basically taking the piss out of the fact that people keep the stickers on their hats oh yeah and then do you remember that and then like so one of them turns up and he's got like a label hanging off his hat then the next one tries to outdo him he wears the hat with the

packet on it's just so it carries on from there it's so bloody good man they're um anyway sorry no but there's such talent man yeah yeah so they've they've basically said that I'm him, which takes a gloss of my first day of filming if they do snap me filming because I look obviously completely different from him. We were doing League of Their Own in Ireland and Patrice Evra. Patrice Evra. Absolute G, by the way.

Absolute, straight up G. Love that bloke. There's a photo of him and it said, Jamie and Freddie Flintoff with Romesh Ranganathan. Right. And I've got to say to you, when I told Patrice and showed him the photo, he tried to hide his sort of reaction,

but I could tell he wasn't happy about it. For me, great news. For him, not so good news. I told you the other thing, didn't I? It was reported. I was wearing a flat cap. Oh, they said that Patrice Everett was you. Yeah.

Oh, my God. Right. I saw another picture. That was a similar reaction to him that he had, actually. Yeah. I saw another picture of, I think it was you, Jamie and Patrice, where they said that you were Idris Elba. I know, mate. So I saw another picture of you, I think it was you, Jamie and Patrice, where they said that you were Idris Elba. I know, mate.

So I saw... Literally, all joking aside, I love you to death. I love every little bit of you, right? And literally, you know, I fucking adore you, right? And I would have actually allowed you to fucking have a sip of Kool-Aid and have a gentle swag about you. Idris Elba, for me, is maybe the most handsome cool man who lives on planet Earth.

He's an incredible human being. And I know I've put that phrase about Idris is fucking a G. And he's a gentleman, right? Like, you're looking like... Before you carry on, I really don't know, I really don't like where you're going with this, OK? Because first of all, you've really heavily complimented me, which is you're earning yourself the right to fucking give me a massive kick in the dick here.

No, no, no. I'm not going to say that, man. What I'm saying to you, Mr. Wolf, tread carefully. Well, I'm not going to even say that. Right, listen to me. Let me finish, right? They have then seen a picture of you with jamie and patrice someone in that in that news department or that a journalist has looked at that picture of you

and gone oh that's idris elba that means right although me and you have talked a lot about you know our issues our problems and how we look at ourselves right that means romesh there's a certain angle a certain light right or whatever where you look like the coolest man on the planet and you have to enjoy this moment you have to because i actually generally think if there's someone to be likened to mate i've been likened to one of the best comedy actors in the world in a fucking fat suit with a fake mustache on right that's who the people think i look like oh and you know what that that's not you i've had more of those do you mean terrible listen that's

first of all let me just say i really did put the boot in on you there and you're about to say something nice so that's there's they've got my face uh but secondly i saw the photo that they got mistaken for i was wearing like a flat cap but you can't really see what you can't really see my face properly. So they've gone playing this down. Well, no, but, but,

but can I tell you what happened after that? So it got reported that Idris Elba was with the boys. So what would happen is, is people would be looking for Idris Elba and they'd see me. And, but I basically had to suffer the rest of my trip people looking at me double looking like doing a double take and then looking utterly disappointed that was that was the rest of my experience that's even better because that means in the flesh people were like fuck man

is that just oh no it's just one match but like that for a second i i wish i wish i could take some sort of uh some sort of joy from it were it not for the fact no but listen i told the swan the story now as you know the swan a massive fan of idris elba huge fan of idris elba maybe why she found you so sexy so much so that for her 40th i did her an idris elba cake that's how much she likes idris elba right and she loved it which version of idris elba well she got into him when he was in Luther. So, you know, she's... Arguably the coolest version of him.

Yeah. Slashy Stringer Bell's fucking amazing. Yeah, Stringer Bell's amazing, but Stringer Bell's not as sexy as Luther, is he? Do you know what I mean? I don't know, man. I think Idris Elba... That's the trouble, I think, with Idris Elba.

If there's one fault he has, I think it's sometimes he's so sexy and so cool. I think he finds it hard. Oh my God, you need to talk to, you need to talk to Lisa. She fucking adores him. Anyway.

Yeah, but he's like, as a writer and a casting person, and when me and you do like doing a show, and if Idris came in, I'd have to walk over and go, Idris,

mate, please just play the sexy down. Please. Yeah. Just part. I reckon, if you're go, Idris, mate, please just play the sexy down. Please, this part. I reckon if you're talking to Idris, you immediately lose sort of four sexy points. I think you lose 150. If you've got four to cling on to.

Well, I'm assuming a scale of 10 here. You know what? He's got that charm about him as well because he makes you feel good about yourself when you meet him. Yeah. Yeah, he does, actually. I met him on'm in the stairs you know people say that thing about people well i go they just make you feel like you're the only person in the room he's got that oh my god literally i met him on the stairs right the first time i met him right what is going on with you

and i put that joke i i was literally crying i'm thinking about it now, right? And he was walking down the stairs. I was walking up. I see him. I'm like, oh, my fucking God. I like this doesn't happen to me a lot. But I literally, my knees start, like, fucking feeling faint. I look at him. Your knees start feeling faint?

Yeah. They start losing. Like, I feel like I'm in a ring and I'm about to have a boxing match and I'm terrified. Because I just look at this guy that I absolutely think is incredible. I turn to him and I go, you all right, mate? And he goes, yes, bro, how you doing? You all right?

And I'm like, yeah, cool, really cool. Really cool. Just go out to the production, go out to pitch some ideas and stuff. That's bad. That sounds bad already. Go on. Then what happened? And then he was like, yeah, just started chatting to me a little bit,

a little bit and asking me some questions about me. Right. Yeah. Which was amazing. Right. I just, at this point I'm just lost. I'm lost in the ether.

Uh, and, uh, then, or lost in the elbow. Right. Oh, 736.

My guy's pulling that at his ass. And then he basically just was like, I was like, look, man, yeah, just going to do this, do that. And he was like, good man, keep cracking on, brother. You'll get there. You'll get there. And then he just sort of hit me on the shoulder, sort of smiled, nodded, and walked off.

I literally flew up those stairs. And I was like, I am pitching the shit out of this show. Because Idris El, it felt, you know what it felt like? You know that old adage of Jesus walking on the beach and like saying, oh yeah, my footsteps in the sand.

Oh, why was there only one footsteps when that felt like Idris Elba put me on his shoulders. Like a pig, hold on, on his shoulders? Yeah,

like I was on his shoulders. Like a piggyback? Yeah, no, yeah, yeah, yeah. And I could just fly.

Like when you, when you take your kid to the football or whatever. Yeah, yeah, yeah. At a theme park. Yeah, yeah. Likeback? Yeah. No, yeah, yeah, yeah. And I could just fly. Like when you take your kid to the football or something? Yeah, yeah, yeah. At a theme park? Yeah, yeah. Like that? Yeah. You've got your legs either side of his head?

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Best Western made booking our family beach vacation a breeze. And it felt a little like... Life's a trip. Make the most of it at Best Western. And it went from feeling like my knees wouldn't work, my legs were all wobbly, to literally going, wow, my legs have never felt stronger and I feel like I could fly. Yeah. And that show, listeners, that Tom pitched that day was Judge Romesh 2. Actually, the show didn't go anywhere because i was so nervous and so like blown away from idris it just kept on going through that the picture can we just talk about

the show no but honestly he put his hand on my shoulder and i felt like he looked into my eyes and we actually had a connection to my I like, remember like literally, I think even in the meeting, I was like, look, I also know Idris Elba and I could probably get him into this. I've been met him for like 45 seconds on some stairs.

Yeah, he's a deeply, deeply, sexual man, isn't he? No, I just think a decent human being. I think if,

yeah man, I think like, you know, I think everyone who's listening to this podcast at some point today. I want just for a minute, just close your eyes and think of Idris Elba, please. Yeah.

Yeah. Just think about what that man has done, what he means. Yeah. His new film. I was about to say to this country, but I mean to the world. Yeah.

He's a, he's a, he's an international superstar. Yeah. So, yeah. So if now someone's like fucking hell we need a lookalike

for Idris Elba you are somewhere on that list I'm on the list if he gets a part of James Bond you could be James Bond's cousin just yeah hey how's it going hello James

it's John here. Wayne. John Bond. No, it'll be Wayne Bond. Oh, Wayne Bond. Just wondering if you're going to get in touch with Mum, because I know you're busy and stuff with all your highfalutin spy stuff, but we still need to know if you're coming to the birthday party.

Wayne, you virgin. Just leave it out. James, I told you that in confidence when we're having a heart-to-heart. And I just want to wait until I'm ready, okay? That would be the greatest film ever. This year, James Bond is going duble with his cousin, Wayne Bond. Oh, no! We can't jump off this!

James, it's too high! This is so dangerous! I'm not going to the dentist, James. You can do it, mate. Tell your sister to look at yourself. Wow, wow, wow. Do you know what? We were having a nice little roleplay there, creating a sketch out of nothing.

Some of the classic magic that you can find on the wall for now. And you had to fucking put another dentist in. Do you know what I'm going to do? I think it's cute. I think it's cute. I've just got this idea like James Bond, like his Idris, brushing your hair as you're in a dentist.

And you just smile at him and go, this actually feels okay. Oh God. Why do you have to i i you know what happened there i tried to join in i even did the voice to try and take some of the sting out of it and you've managed to put a little bit of extra fucking prick into it oh god that would be i reckon that would be genuinely that would be the end of james but yeah that would be one way to bring the end of James Bond yeah that would be one way to bring the franchise to an end immediately

wouldn't it yeah but you know what I think you would be sick in James Bond genuinely I think you're a sick actor so I think something like that

would be fucking good for you not as James Bond neither of us hey you know what would be fucking cool we could talk to them about what me and you would be like

two bad guys I could be like yeah I'd love that that'd be so we could actually be the wolf for now oh yeah that could be the name of our yeah that could be the name of our organization we've got some business called the wolf wolf and our link or something and it's a front for what we're really up to which is like sort of like mega weapons yeah we'll have to disfigure our face we could be known as the mega weapons yeah and then and i'll go and i'll say, Wolf,

you are a hell of a mega weapon. And then you go, you're a mega weapon too, Thank you, my mega weapon, brother. Oh, is that what your accent would be?

My accent would be like this. Mine would be more like, I'll have mine like this. Why does he keep interfering with the operation? I have no idea but the one thing i can tell you somebody somebody just kill him i'm fed up with this my cousin the wolf and i are sick of our operations being interrupted by this man end it end it now or i end you go something like that that would be amazing hen at a henchman yeah

and we're both wearing board shorts and open toe sandals what is it with you and board shorts I think it's cute I love board shorts they're coming back

by the way next summer oh no thank god thank god reaches for his wardrobe have you watched James Bond yet

no no no I'm going to watch it. I might go and watch it next week or the week after. Once the film and the curse is done, I'm going to do some serious cinema in. I'm going to get some real cinema in. Do a James Bond. I want to see the film,

the St. Mini Saints in Newark. Yeah. It's a rock oven. I've got something. Can I ask you a question if you think this is bad? Go. I got takeaway on Sunday right

I got a Pizza Express nice this is not, I'm not being paid for this Pizza Express have done a whole load of new vegan pizzas Pizza Express for caring we got a load of pizzas we ate the pizzas

we tried to cheat Alex a bit because... Can I just tell you, that's where you've made the mistake. Out of all your children, he's the one who's most like me. He's the hardest to trick. Yeah, so he only likes margarita, right? Yeah. He only likes margarita. I respect that.

He's a traditionalist. When the pizza arrived, it had jackfruit pepperoni on it. They'd got the order wrong. So Alex, I didn't want him to have to wait for another pizza. So Lisa and I just very quickly, as we heard him coming down the stairs, ate all of the jackfruit pepperoni. Just picked it off the pizza and ate it. And then shut the box and didn't say anything.

Because Alex is very particular about what he eats. Yeah, he's a fucking genie kid. He's an absolute legend. So he came in and he started eating it he swaggered it i'd imagine he did he swaggered it he sat down he uh he started eating it and then he said oh i need a drink this is uh spicier than the normal margarita and i thought oh no he's on to us. And then he sat down and then he said, can I ask a question? I said, why? And he goes, why are there pepperoni-shaped sort of marks in my pizza?

And I said, I don't know. I don't know why they've done that. And then he just stopped. And you know what, Tom, you're absolutely right. He could not be fooled. He said, what's happened? And I said to him... He sounds like Luther. Yeah. He sounds like Idris. He said, what's happened? And I said to him... He sounds like Luther.

Yeah. He sounds like Idris. Yeah, I mean, he did have that kind of vibe about him. Anyway, Lisa and I, it was so pathetic. Lisa and I had to own up to our son about what had happened. Yeah. So we didn't want to have to wait for another pizza. So we took the pepperoni off that one.

And da-da-da-da-da. And then he ate it. He ate it all. And you know what? Lisa and I felt very ashamed. If only we just, you know, treated him with a bit of respect and owned up to him.

You know what would have been a really cool ending to that, right? Is if, like, you're putting him to bed that night and you're like, no, mate. And then he's just got his little bedside lamp on and he goes, Dad. And you're like, yeah. He's like, you know that business with the jackfruit on my pizza, yeah?

And you're like, yeah. Yeah, mate. I know what you mean. And he just says. Sorry, am I talking to him while at the edge of orgasm or something? No, you're at the edge. You're not. Why are you doing that?

Yeah. Yeah. Go on. No, because you're nervous, right? Right. And he literally, like, stares at you dead in the eye, right? He looks at you and he goes, you got away with it this time, yeah? Don't ever do that to me again.

And you do a big gulp and you went, I won't. I'm proud of you. And he says, I don't need your pride. I need your decent pizzas. And he turns off his little bedside lamp. And you walk out, close the door, and just sweep your brow and go, wow. Oh, God. Well, that's not actually a very nice little ending there.

That is not the problem. That's not the thing I'm embarrassed about. The thing I'm embarrassed about is the next day, yesterday, I'm talking to Jeff Norcott. We start talking about curry. Yeah, shout out to Jeff Norcott. Friend of the podcast,

Jeff Norcott. Friend of life. Yeah, absolutely right. And he mentions curry. Right. And then last night I ordered a curry. What? You had two for two? Yeah, on a Monday night.

Yeah, two for two. That's bad, isn't it? Nah. I think you have to do that every now and again. You shouldn't do that. I mean, how often? You should be doing that, what, twice a year at most? Two for two?

No, I think this year I've done a four for five. You've done a four for five? Yeah. What happened? I've hit the pizza. five. You've done a four for five? Yeah. What happened? I've hit the pizza, or Italian, so lasagna chips. What were you doing at this time? What was going on in your life? Me and Catherine were just going for a takeaway face.

Then Chinese, had a day off. Then an Indian. And then we had the Indian the next day as well. So four for five. That doesn't count, though. You're having leftovers from the Indian. Yeah, but I mean, it's still a takeaway. That's not a four for five. That's a three for five.

That's a three from four, then. That's a three for five. That's a three for four. Yeah. But that's still pretty. It's a three for four. Yeah. Yeah.

But I mean, yeah, get your facts right when you sort of do an announcement. Yeah, you're a leftover guy, by the way. Do you smash up? Yeah, you do, don't you? Yeah, we've talked about it. Yeah, I love it. You know, the best thing

with an Indian, mix all that shit together. Mix it all together. Just throw in a George Foreman. Wrap it up. Or if you've got a leftover naan. Oh, man.

Bombay potatoes. I would love to just, just like, yeah, Indian food, man. Vrindul Bhaji is fucking, I love it so much. I think that is the thing that just makes me

the most satisfied in the world Indian is that your favourite meal would you say Indian yeah by quite a long way as well by quite a long way

I think so for me as well I just think it's delightful I think it's so nobody else in this nobody else in this house is a fan

the swan's not a fan are you she's in the room don't mind it which but can you that's what on a Monday night The Swan's not a fan, are you? She's in the room, by the way. Don't mind it. Don't mind it. Which, but, can you, that's what the, that's the response. On a Monday night, though.

Pardon? Not on a Monday night. Well, not on any other night with you. I've already cooked. She'd already, she had already cooked, actually. What, you got, oh, hold up,

this is a whole fucking curveball. Why would you say this? So, hold up, Lisa had already cooked, right? No, no, no. No, no. And then you come in and demand a curry, even though she's cooked a delicious meal.

No, I didn't come in and demand a curry. Let me explain what happened. No, you did explain it's a curry. Lisa was out with the kids. This is literally spellbinding to see how this relationship works at times. The Swans are home, right? She's had a long day.

It's a Monday. The hardest day of the week. She's cooked a lovely dinner and then you text with an exclamation mark saying curry. I want to see what you said. No, no, that's not what happened. She's left the room now. Now she's thrown me into the fire. She's walked out.

So, no, I'll tell you what happened. I did actually feel quite bad about it what happened was lisa had said to me are you in for dinner right and i said yes and she said because i'm doing like sausage and jacket potato right it's like a little thing we have a lovely amazing meal anyway i forgot that you have baked beans for that by the way on occasion yeah it's lovely baked beans and a bit so i am long and the short of it is i forgot that she'd said that so then she was out and i texted her and i said do you fancy curry i'm ordering some she didn't see that text message and then she came back a little bit later

and i said i'm just ordering i ordered some curry do you want some and she goes no she goes i was doing sausage and jacket potato and then i remembered that we'd had that conversation and i felt really bad. And I did apologize. Wow. So she spent the whole day looking forward to a sausage and jacket potato. Well, she was actually, Tom,

unlike some men, I allow my wife to eat what she wants. So she could still have that dinner. No. I don't know what you're getting at there. No. You didn't make her cook her dinner while you had a delicious takeaway curry.

I offered her curry. That's what I'm saying to you. She doesn't really like curry. Wow. She certainly wouldn't have it on a Monday night. So what, you had curry on your own? Let me tell you how you get the swan to eat curry. Go on.

Okay? All right. You mention it a week before. Yeah. Okay, that you want to have it. And you start sort of talking. So I might go, God, do you know what I fancy next weekend?. Okay. That you want to have it. And you start sort of talking. So I might go, God,

do you not fancy next weekend? A curry. Do you fancy a curry? Yeah, maybe. Okay. That's the starting point. Yeah.

Then as the week goes on, just every night go, Oh, you're still up for that curry. So now I start talking like she's agreed to it. Right. You still up for that curry? Still up for that curry?

Just like a kid. Can't wait for that curry tomorrow. And then the curry arrives uh you eat the curry and she goes yeah i don't really enjoy curry as much as you do and then we we start the merry dance all over again because like i don't know why but the boys don't yeah yeah yeah sometimes it's very difficult to uh to convince lisa to have curry and actually it's so It's very difficult to convince Lisa to have curry. And actually, it's so difficult to convince her to have curry that when we're eating it, I feel like...

Do you know when you're a kid and you may have behaved a bit spoiled and then you get the thing that you want and then you actually feel a bit ashamed of yourself because of the way you behaved? That's how I feel when we're eating a curry sometimes. I feel like, you know... Yeah, but then she's got to enable your curry-ness

so you can have a curry every now and again. You can't have sausage and jacket potatoes every night. No, that's the problem. She's making it every night,

this woman. Every fucking night. It is an amazing meal. Tell Lisa that, put that in the top five things when I come to your house for tea to put in the mix.

To put in the mix? Well, you know, I like different, so she's got different ideas of what are my favourite foods. Sure,

sure. Yeah, I mean, that implies that you're going to be coming around five times. Which, let's just see how the first one goes, shall we? That'd be lovely, sausage and jacket potatoes. Oh, lovely. Actually, as well, just to say, if you wanted, I could probably have sausage and jacket potatoes and then eat a curry with you.

That's a good shout. Do you know what? Now that you've said that i think i mean you you being round could be quite the little quite the little coup in terms of me eating a bit more food like a lot you always have vegan sausages do the boys have vegan vegetarians do they have the vegetarian no the boys don't theo does theo's veggie the other two on but we have the linda mccartney sausages they're banging they're fucking banging. Yeah. They're good. They're bangers.

Oh, Jesus. That's where you step off the Edris Elba vibe. I know. You're so cool up to do that. He'd never say anything like that, would he? No. He doesn't need to try and be funny. Me and you have to try and be funny.

He doesn't need to be. Imagine an amazing day out. Me, you, Francis, the train guy, and Idris Elba. Yeah. Yeah, Francis has been in touch, actually. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's happening. We are transporting.

We are transporting. Waiting till our diaries are clear, and we're doing it. I can't wait. I love that kid. I love that kid, too. You know the other trouble is that Francis and Idris would get on, and me and you would be at school. We'd just be out, ostracised.

Do you know what would be so sad? We'd be trying to be friends with him, and then Francis, just by being himself and being comfortable in his own skin, Idris would sort of turn around and go, you know what? I actually respect that, because these two just keep telling me

they like the same sort of stuff as I like, whereas you, Francis, you're being yourself, and you know what? That's what life's all about. So you know what? I think you might be the guy I want to hang out with. How about we ditch these two chumps? God, if we do a podcast special, I mean you weren't even in it.

They became the new wolf and owl. Oh, no. And they're better, even when you think about them. Idris is a better wolf. Francis is a better owl. By the way, I will say that I respect the fact that you gave me Idris. Idris would be the wolf and you'd be the owl. Francis, I do respect respect the fact that you like that you gave me interest as a like interest would be the wolf and you'd be the owl like francis i do respect that why do you respect that

it's just a cool thing that you told me i feel good about that now what because francis isn't cool no francis is really cool i'm just saying i thought you were so happy we spent the last we spent the last 25 minutes saying that you're like interest well let me just rewind i spent about a minute talking about how cool he was, and then you started monologuing and practically fucking jizzing all over the fucking podcast about what you thought of him. I kept trying to move it on.

And he don't know any other thing that's so cool about him. Do you know what? There's been quite a few times I've tried to address that. Idris is, you know, like you have people you look at and then you try and, like, copy stuff. It's Idris Elba and Rio Ferdinand right

yeah yeah and Jason Statham a bit Statham was and also let's let us not forget

one of your style icons Kevin Hart oh Kevin Hart's sick man with some stuff he wears yeah I know ooh French lavender soy blend candle. I told you HomeSense has good gift options.

Hmm, well, I don't know. Mom's gonna love it. She'll take one sniff and be transported to that anniversary trip you took to San Tropez a few years ago. Forget it, she complained about her sunburn the whole trip. It's only $14. $14? Now that's a vacation I can get behind. Deal so good, everyone approves. Only at HomeSense. In today's economy, saving money is like an extreme sport.

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The Happy Stack. Only at Kudo. Conditions apply. So let's be clear. When it comes to shipping internationally, can I provide trade documents electronically? Mm-hmm. The answer is FedEx. Okay.

But what about estimating duties and taxes on my shipments? How do I find all the... Also FedEx. Impressive. Is there a regulatory specialist I can ask about? FedEx. Oh. But let's say that... FedEx. about? FedEx. Oh, but let's say that...

FedEx. What a... FedEx. Thanks. No more questions. Always your answer for international shipping. FedEx, where now meets next. We did, we hung out the other day and my love for Adidas got brought into the crossfires from someone. Oh yeah, we went and did a corporate, a Wolf and Al corporate. We never thought that would happen.

No. We did a Wolf and Al corporate. And I got brought into it. And Tom was, well, let's just give this a bit of context. You're wearing an Adidas tracksuit, which I loved. Yeah. You had Adidas trainers on, which obviously, if you've got an Adidas tracksuit, that makes perfect sense.

Adidas socks on. Yeah. Were you wearing an Adidas hat? Yeah, an Adidas cap, yeah. So you can understand why somebody might have thought, you've turned up like a fucking athlete. Yeah, but you know what? About to do some training.

I'm fiercely loyal. I love Adidas and what they stand for, as I've said before on this podcast. athlete. Yeah, but you know what? I'm about to do some training. I'm fiercely loyal. I love Adidas and what they stand for as I've said before on this podcast. Sure. Yeah. And,

and, you know, what do we reckon? £35 worth of free gear that buys you loyalty for life? Yeah. Yeah. Actually,

shout out, talking about Adidas, I want to shout out a friend of mine who works for Adidas, Dan, who did a marathon, Manchester marathon

this week smashed it my guy fan of the podcast absolute gentleman so shout out keep doing you my brother

keep doing you well done for doing something I will never ever ever ever do do you think you've got one marathon in you

no no whenever whenever I see the posts from people and they go it's always a story like I fell over I fell over No, no. Whenever I see the posts from people and they go,

it's always a story like, I fell over on mile 10 and hurt my wrist, but I carried on. Or my calf popped on mile 12 and it was absolute agony, but the cheers of the crowd kept me going. My story would be, it started to get sore on mile two. I'm sorry to everyone that sponsored me, but I decided that was enough What would you rather fight in a charity boxing match

or run a marathon? That's a great question You've got to do one, like Calm come to you shout out Calm doing some amazing stuff, right, Calm come to you and they're like Ron we need you to do one of these two things you've either got a fight, who would be someone

that you'd fight who'd be a good fight? Jamie Thixton, right? In a, in a, like, celebrity boxing match,

right? I don't even know what would happen if I got the shit kicked out of me by Jamie Thixton. Thixton's got some, I don't know,

I don't know what the fallout would be. On this podcast alone, I don't know what the fallout would be. Right podcast alone I don't know what the fallout would be so you've either got Thieker's or you've got to run a marathon I'd do the marathon would you really?

I just don't like the idea of being hit would you do the boxing? yeah me versus Thieker's then I'd fancy my chances sure but I just think there is a possibility that Thiexton will get you with a lucky one. And then forever, you're known as the guy that got sparked out by Jamie Thiexton.

You want that? I'd have to just, I'd take my risk. Mate, I respect people who do marathons. I respect boxers as well, but the marathon man is a, like, I'd sooner get sparked out by Thiexton and, like, after seven minutes and put a good account of myself. A marathon is, I think marathon runners Fexton and like, after seven minutes and put a good account of myself.

A marathon is, I think marathon runners are the, like, I have all the biggest respect for those guys, man. The biggest respect out of anyone you respect

is a marathon runner. Well, not the biggest. I've got a lot of respect in my heart. Obviously, your heart, right, let me just break it down for you so you understand,

right? Your heart is broken up into many different formulas, right, in many different compartments, okay? Right? So there's love, right? There heart is broken up into many different formulas, right? In many different compartments, okay? Right? So there's love,

right? There's adulation, da-da-da-da-da-da, right? One of the parts. These are sections, so is it split up in sections like the tongue,

is it? Yeah, kind of, yeah, yeah. But imagine, remember like penny pockets type vibes,

right? Yeah. Right? So you've got all those, they're like little, little doors that you've got in your heart, right?

And one of them's marked respect. And when you have when you have you open respect one there's loads of other little doors who are they so does it actually say it on there does it no no no but when your heart experts know the different parts of your heart so they don't okay they'll probably have like a graph and they'll go okay what have we got here oh that's a respect bit do you know what i mean right okay yeah carry on so go on so you So there's only so much respect you can have for people. So you have loads of different bits of respect. You have bigger draws for more respect and stuff. So like, and then you respect someone like Idris Elba for one thing. You respect someone else for like, respect, I don't know,

like someone amazing for saying else. And then like, you know, so it's all comparative, you know? And yeah, and some of the biggest respects I do have, like out of my respect vaults, is for marathon runners. for saying else and then like you know so it's all comparative you know and yeah and some of the biggest respects I do have like out of my respect vaults is for marathon runners I just

I don't know why you wouldn't have put all that bullshit in the brain everything you just described there because that would make sense

you've got a little part for respect for all that would make sense in the brain in the mind but you had to put it in the heart you're analytical

you think with your brain I think with my heart that's what makes you such a good the mind but you have to put it in the heart you're analytical you think with your brain I think with my heart that's what makes you such a good friend no but what I'm saying is at least what? what are you looking around for?

I was looking for a pillow because I've been sitting on a table for ages why don't you go get yourself a pillow because you're about to do emails oh my god

why did I have to say that you're shuffling backwards I've only in mind the pants as well yeah me too I've got a blanket Why did I have to say that? You're shuffling backwards. I've only in my underpants as well. Yeah, me too. I've got a blanket up around me like a nan. Have you? Well, give me a second.

Let me just go and get a pillow to sit on. It really hurts my butt. Oh, my God. Just, you know, like a little thing. You know how you're supposed to put the towels on the floor and stuff if you want them to launder them? I would just ask them for a post-it so you can write burn this on that. It's fucking two years' time someone laying on this pillow again.

It still smells. I smell... I smell the musk of a wolf. Is this... Can you just smell this? Does this smell like wolf gooch to you? Wolf gooch. you wolf gooch oh I love you, you rascal

right, should we do some emails my G yeah yeah yeah, go on boy alright fine, so first up this is from Alex yo Alex, you're a G we've spoken to Alex before apparently a few months ago you gave me advice regarding the resting bitch face issue.

Well, I didn't have the response I wanted. I definitely listened and heard the advice I needed, and I can see it has worked wonders, and no longer being on the defensive has eased off. So I'm coming back to you again for suggestions. My wife has been a vegetarian for all her life. I've been with her for eight years-ish. I decided to do the right thing.

I've successfully had no meat in three months and plan to go on strong i don't miss it which is surprising but i do find uh the fake meat better it now appears i'm lactose intolerant out of nowhere so while i can take tablets to ease the cheese i thought fuck it i might as well go vegan it's the midweek meals i need help with i'm getting bored of chipped beans and richmond vegan sausages they are good those so rom tom what would you cook in a time and tired state uh tom you've said you're 80 veggie vegan i'm keen to know what sort of changes or meals you would happily eat over and over again cheers my guys as always for improving my mental health alex yo alex you're g thank you and i'm glad that uh your the original email has been

helped i want to shout out uh if someone that does good vegan vegetarian meals uh the mindful chef have you ever used that one that does sound familiar maybe you can ping in the mic maybe you've talked about it no i haven't i've never talked about it here um mindful chef is yeah they do some amazing meals that you can just ping in the microwave if you're tired i've been using them a lot some nice vegan vegetarian vibes um but you know what one of the old classics mate vegetarian vegan wise i love you can't beat a good ratatouille lovely nice vegetable casserole quite easy to do. Ping it in, little vegetable stock, little menage of different veg,

put it in a big pot, whoop it in the oven, you know, go about your business, an hour later you've got a dinner fit for a king, a vegetarian king. If you want to add a bit of treatiness to that vegetable casserole, here's a little tip for you. Just late on,

throw in a little bit of veggie sausage. There you go, mother. Well, that's it. Also, if Roma should be so kind, one of the best vegetarian things I've ever eaten, vegan things, is his mother's brindle bargy.

Aubergine curry, yeah. That takes a little bit of time, but it's delicious. I would highly recommend it. Do you know that, how many meals do you reckon you cycle for? Apparently the average British family goes through four or five meals

that they just rotate for the whole of their lives. Yeah, me and Catherine, we're both pretty, we both love being in the kitchen. What we tend to do is go through vibes where, I'll tell you another good thing is vegan, vegetarian, chilli with a bit of corn, mince. I think it's better than beef. the kitchen what we tend to do is go through vibes where i'll tell you another good thing is uh like vegan vegetarian chili with a bit of corn mince i think it's better than beef uh if you get a good

veggie uh mince i think corn's a really good one wallop that in nice spicy stir fry yeah a little bit of a little bit some corn bits in there or a bit of tofu whatever you fancy that's nice for vegetarian eaters there's nothing that you get your spice right rocking really going fucking saving spices thank you tom great shout great shout you know it's more than just a salt ting do you mean just enjoy it i can live for the moment. Get yourself a little turmeric, cayenne pepper. Just really just... I'll tell you what, just stand there at the spice rack and let the spice rack... Like, in the supermarket,

and let the spice here speak to you. Just be fucking radical and crazy and just go for it. Go, fuck, I'm going to get some tarragon. I don't care what anyone says. And then just chuck it in like salt bae. Just, you know... Actually, I've got a problem with salt bae. Me too.

I think he's... I think he's an absolute helmet I'm sorry I don't get it I do too and I think everyone that eats in his restaurant is a helmet as well

it's bad isn't it I shouldn't feel like this but I do I find him one of the most irritating people on planet earth I've got to say

I find him more irritating than you do I've got to say I don't know I'd fight you for that I genuinely I look at those moments I'd run a marathon

against you for that I'd fight him in a boxing ring. I'd run against him in the Virgin London Marathon. Would you? No. I'm not offering salt by absolutely destroying me.

But I do, I do find, why do you find it so annoying? Why don't we give this a bit of, a bit of meat on these bones?

I just find that, number one, he's not, I don't get it at all. I think, yeah, he's an average barbecue chef,

right? Who's come up with a different way of putting a bit of it at all i think you know he's an average barbecue chef right who's come up with a different way of putting a bit of salt on a fucking you know uh it's a fad it's like it's a thing that people have jumped on and it's just become like everyone's like oh this this about and i don't know i this is a really bad thing to say and i might i might be completely found wrong on this and this might be a sweeping statement i just don't like his vibe oh i just like i find the whole thing a little bit uh now this is where i'm trying to find a word i think he ostracizes a lot of different people because you know the high the high point of like you know what he does is sort of surrounds himself everything's expensive everyone around him's like this celebrity vibe it's this sort of thing so i think straight away it's an elitist fucking form of him being like yeah but that's what but yes i

agree with what you're saying and that is why it's slightly annoying if i was sort of playing devil's advocate on this that is what you're paying for with salt bayonet you've what all those people that go to the restaurant, they want to enjoy... To be honest with you, mate, it's kind of... It's a similar experience consumer-wise

to buying designer clothes. Well, what you're trying to do is you're trying to buy something less accessible and part of that experience is the fact that you're paying to go somewhere that a lot of people can't that's what

that's yeah but also i mean with i don't know i just find it's like there's different there's a few places i've been where people talk about food and go like oh this is you know this and actually you go this isn't anywhere near as good as somewhere like what's what's the sri lanka restaurant in soho you're talking about hoppers? Yeah, Hoppers, right? Yeah. I went to Hoppers with friends, right? I've never really heard about it. I think it's got bigger now.

It's become more, right? Yeah. I will go as far as saying, like, I had a vegetarian meal there, right? It blew my fucking mind. Like, genuinely blew my mind. To the point where I probably talked about it for about a month after and how incredible it was, right? So I look at salt bae but I look at like the skill it takes

to make three or four different vegetarian curries like the breads in there are insane the potato bread thing that they do the skill it takes right don't get me wrong there's a world where like barbeque and meat there's a skill to it but I don't think it's anywhere near as

skillful as what they do. I just think the whole thing is, you know, I've been to great, like,

Turkish restaurants, Lebanese restaurants where the grilled meat's incredible. They haven't got some wanker who comes in and fucking

puts your salt on for you. Do you know what I mean? I just find the whole thing, it's... But that's what you're, but that's, that's part of the thing.

You're doing it so you can put that on the gram. Yeah, but that's what I mean. But that's where it becomes elitist and just going, oh, put that on the gram. Yeah, but that's what I mean. But that's where it becomes elitist and just going, oh, we've got this. And also, if I'm honest with you,

I want to put my own fucking salt on. And that thing annoys me now. That annoys me. Look, can I tell you what annoys me more than the salt about Salt Bae? It's the squeeze in the burgers. Yeah. Like, he comes up and he squeezes the burgers to sort of show the juice in the

burger patty and it just looks rank it looks i don't like it no i don't like it and also let's be honest he's not you know there's probably going to be no veggie options i don't think but my main issue i think we have the same issue with it i just think that the the thing that we have an issue with is the reason that people like the restaurant so you just have to accept that yeah but also let me just tell you it's like von dutch in what way everyone like there was a time when everyone von dutch because everyone had von dutch caps everyone dutch went mad everyone you know everyone just literally ate this like smashed the shit out of von dutch right and then all of a sudden yeah it was like

nothing it was like you know It was like, you know, it's become uncool. What would you think if I came to meet up with you and I had a Von Dutch hat on? Now I think it was epically cool. Would you think, oh shit, this is kind of, this is quite a cool

anti-move that he's making. Would you think, oh no, this poor bastard doesn't know how to buy a new hat. Section A. I saw my friend Maya Jammer smashing a fucking Von Dutch anti-move that he's making would he fit on this poor bastard that doesn't know how to buy a new hat section A I saw my friend Maya Jammer smashing a fucking Von Dutch cap the other day I thought epically cool

you're bringing it back you don't care you're still repping like you know what if that happens to Salt Bae and no one went to his restaurant because everyone had like

fucking sucked the call out of it right I'd probably go in and he'd be all fucking I'd love that his beard would grow and he wasn't even wearing his hair

and a ponytail anymore like his hands you sort of don't want him to do the salt because his elbow looks so filthy yeah and I'd just go in

and he'd go a customer and I'd go hello mate and he'd go what can I get you I was like get us one of your burgers mate

don't squeeze it just I want to save you the meat and he'd go why did you come and I'd go because you need me now more than you did then. Yeah.

When you were at your peak, I slagged you off on a podcast and hoped for your downfall. And now I've come to rescue you so that you can give me some credit. Despite the fact I've wished ill on you since the moment you started. Is that what you do? You fucking hypocrite. Not since the moment he started. There's a time time turn up like a

fucking like you're the Messiah he I'd love to see that just Instagram of you on your own in Salt Bay's restaurant couldn't even convince anyone

to come with you I do some of my best eating on my own me too Alex I hope to our next I hope that answers your question.

Yeah, Alex, hope that helps. Good luck. And also maybe me and Ron, maybe in like a couple of years, we'll do like a sort of cookbook together. Yeah,

I can't imagine what recipes that would consist of, but yeah, sure. Okay. This is from Anonymous. Hi, Wolf, Owl and Swan.

I've been listening to the podcast since it started absolutely love it just wonder if we get some advice as my boyfriend and i feeling very stressed at home so i live with my boyfriend and his best mate i set my best i set my boyfriend's best mate up about eight months ago since this time his girlfriend has been staying at our house six to seven days a week i've been more than welcoming and excited to have another gal in the house looking for the whole house helping her out whenever she needs it helping her write cvs and apply for jobs but it's got to the point that to ask for money towards bills in the house which i made sure i did in a calm and friendly way her reaction is to send 35 pounds a month and contribute nothing else to the house

i also asked whether it'd be okay if we had a few days without anybody coming around as i'm feeling overwhelmed with the constant traffic of my housemates, friends and girlfriend, again, in a friendly and non-confrontational way. This led to the girlfriend saying she doesn't want to come around because she thinks I don't like her. She hasn't messaged and doesn't want to confront me. It's left me feeling anxious. I don't know what to do. I fear it's going to come between my boyfriend

and his best friend's long-term friendship. It's going to make it impossible to celebrate birthdays and events without feeling awkward. What the fuck do I do? Thank you and sorry this is so long-term friendship it's going to make it impossible to celebrate birthdays and events without feeling awkward what the fuck do i do thank you and sorry this is so long-winded this is this is such a common yo can you just do me one favor on that did did she say she messaged the woman about not having friends coming around or did she speak to her about it got to the point uh i asked would it be okay if we had a few days without anybody coming round as I was feeling overwhelmed by the constant traffic of my housemates, friends and girlfriend.

Again, in a friendly and non-confrontational way. But she's not said if this is face-to-face or... No, I'm assuming it's face-to-face. By the way she says that, that would be my guess. Just looking at the way she said it. Personally, I think you've handled this in a very adult and mature way. So my thing was having these conversations face-to-face is better rather than carrying any sort of angst.

I think text messages and emails, when it comes to anything like this, are the worst fucking thing in the world. That is one bit of modern fucking technology that's an absolute dog shit thing so i think if you've got a problem with someone the only way of dealing with that is a face-to-face sit down conversation which you've done in a adult way but the trouble is i think in this situation what you're dealing with is sort of dealing with someone clearly who's a little bit more juvenile than you are and someone who's like not to, you know, to respect boundaries. I think, like, you know, I think the first point is that this is your flat,

your living, your accommodation, and I think that if someone can't respect that, then the problem sort of lies with her. So what the trouble is, I think, that you have in society and you have in these sort of situations is you're dealing with a very sort of adult manner but then you've got almost sort of dumbed down to deal with someone in a more juvenile sort of way and you've got to work out and navigate the best way to sort of speak to them that they're going to understand so i think it's it's seeing if she's up for going i think number one speaking to uh sort of over half and seeing how he feels about it and saying that you know

i wasn't being confrontational. I think, you know, it's worth mentioning that to him. And then I think, you know, getting in touch with her and saying that, you know, I wasn't being aggressive, wasn't being disrespectful. This is where I'm coming at. I'm under a lot of stress, you know, work wise, you know, life wise. And sometimes I just want a little bit of me space. wise um and sometimes i just want a little bit of me space i want a bit of space it's i i've lived in a situation where i lived with a couple and it was fucking you know sure on the other foot sort of vibe it was very it's a difficult thing to live with two people who are together at times it's sort of you know so looking at your flatmate situation it could that can be quite hard

and i think if he's now with this other girl it's sort of you know he cares but I think it's I suppose it's a sort of an argument that maybe they should probably look at if they're getting that serious if they should look at getting their own place and having their own space together but it's then keeping that friendship going and making sure that you sort of yeah you hold on to that so I mean yes it is a difficult one. I think just a sat-down conversation, but working out the best way of dealing with this person, which I think is probably making sure you make them feel sort of good about themselves and making sure that they realise that they're not 100% the problem.

They're just a sort of element to how you're feeling. Really great. Once again, Tom, beautiful, beautiful advice, eloquently put. Thank you. You're a credit to podcasting. I'm going to say that. I know that sounded sarcastic, but I mean it. I think with these situations, Anonymous, it's very, very difficult,

but I think a lot of these problems can be solved when it comes to arguments like this by putting yourself completely and utterly in the other person's position and trying to understand why they might be feeling how they're feeling. So looking at what you've talked about here, this girl has started seeing this guy, and she obviously likes him because she's coming around six or seven days a week. She's excited about a new relationship.

Obviously, that's eight months ago so it started to get more and more serious from her point of view i'm just reading this from her point of view you asked for money towards bills in the house okay and you did it in a calm and friendly way i don't know if you specified an amount because what you've said then is that she sent 35 pounds a month and she contributes nothing else to the house did you ask for more money than that and she said all i want to send is 35 pounds a month or did she make up that figure and you said it was all right like you know i'm just trying to establish this because from her point of view you've asked for money to contribute towards

bills in the house because she's visiting so much she's responded to that by sending 35 pounds a month and then you've asked if you could come around a bit less i'm not i'm not saying that this is a bad thing from your point of view i'm just trying to put i'm trying to encourage you to put yourself in her her shoes so that you can try and have a conversation with her that leads to a resolution to this and so like often what you need to do is i find this with like whenever i'm having disagreements with anyone whenever i'm having whenever on the rare occasion having a disagreement with the swan i always put myself completely and utterly in her point of view and 99 of the time i realize that i've been in the wrong um where like i just and

i'm not saying you were in the wrong here at all all i'm saying is it will help you when you have a chat with her you need to have a clear the air conversation you need to have a chat with her about to sort this all out because the the truth of it is is that if you let this stay as it is now it is going to create a problem so you've got to deal with this and dealing with that means having a conversation with this girl and sorting this out and coming to a compromise that you're all happy with. Because currently I don't think you are all happy with this compromise. Because at the moment she's not coming around, which is kind of what you wanted to a degree,

but now you're feeling really upset about it. So what you want is to arrive at sort of an equilibrium where she's coming around the amount you want her to come around. You feel like she's contributing the amount she wants to, and also your housemate and his girlfriend are also happy with the situation as well, that's what you need to arrive at, the only way you arrive at that is by having an open conversation, where you detach yourself from any of the things that are talked about, you sort of depersonalize it, and you go, what do you want from the situation, this is what I want from the situation, how do we arrive at a compromise here and it's as easy or as difficult as that you know

you've got to try and like tom said it's it's very easy to be personally invested in this you have to try and extract that so you can have the conversation freely that would be my advice and let me just say wow well, if we were playing poker, I've just gone, I had an amazing hand. Your hand was even more creamy and delicious. Okay, it's not a competition. No, I'm just saying, it was lovely advice. We're doing this, you and I are doing this together.

Yeah, I'm just saying, it was lovely advice. There's so much for her to devour here. Yeah. Do you mean I went on a bit? Is that what you're saying? No, no, I genuinely think that's brilliant advice. I actually listened to that advice you just gave and thought,

wow, I'm going to use that in situations I'm in. Well, thank you so much. Anonymous, I hope that helps. Good luck.

Keep it real. Keep it flavoursome. Keep it so flavoursome. Tom. Yeah. It's about that time, RG. It's about that time. Yeah. It's about that time, RG. Okay. It's about that time.

Yo. Could you do us the honour? You got it. Oh, you sort of sound a little bit like Jay-Z about to spit some bars. Oh, yo. Yeah. Another one. Here we go.

Go on. And the world turns. And the days that were once so sunny. and you bathed in the rays of the sun turn a little bit colder and the skies become grayer and the clouds pull in put on the handbrake and sit there the days become shorter your psyche can then be transformed into a way where negativity is attached to the grey into the dark and the little chinks of sunlight which would a positivity dwindle. But that's not the key.

The key is to remember the weather is just something out in the ether. It's just something there that can limit you but it can also excel you own the dark own own the gray if it's raining don't think about oh shit it's raining think yes it's raining you know the best thing to do when it's raining number one the water the earth is getting the water it needs to make it nourished and fine but But also, I'm going to stick on a film. I'm going to kick back, get the heating on all nice, put a duvet on with yourself and a loved one or a family, get the dog licking up on your feet, and enjoy those moments.

When it's cold and it's breezy and autumnal, get out, take a walk. Look at your breath in the air and remember, wow, it's incredible, I can breathe. Smell the bonfires. Get ready for Christmas. It's easy to get down this time of year. I got you. I realise that. It's also a time to enjoy, for me, the most fabulous time of year.

Weather ain't nothing but a ting. Your mind is stronger than the earth and what surrounds it. You got this wow that was yeah so lovely and motivational i really enjoyed you know what i really just you know what i felt jay-z inside me for a moment then did you yeah no it felt it sounded like one of his sounded like something off the black album actually you know the greatest thing i've ever seen one of them anyway is that glastononbury when Jay-Z played Glastonbury. Really?

There are a lot of people that weren't really that keen on him playing Glastonbury. Then fuck them. They're idiots. And oafs. What I was going to say to you, we've had a few emails asking, basically saying that they really love your closes

to the podcast. Yeah. And asking if I switch my microphone off because they can't hear me and whenever they're listening to you do your thing they're laughing i mean obviously they're taking in the advice and the metaphor the knowledge yeah but just to give you an idea i spend most of my i think tom can verify this i spend most of the time when tom does his endings with my face in my hands trying not to laugh for what he's saying i mean it's uh it's a beautiful thing one of the time when Tom does his endings with my face in my hands, trying not to laugh at what he's saying.

I mean, it's a, it's a beautiful thing. One of the things when I, when I'm on my deathbed and my time on this, I'm shuffling off this mortal coil. One of the things I look at, look back at most fondly is me sitting on the scene,

watching you doing those. You know, what I think at the moment, so I'm doing those. You know, what I think at the moment that I'm doing those, who I think of, is me and you are like Rose and Jack from the Titanic

when their eyes meet across the ballroom. What, and you're kicking me off a No, no, no, that's the end. That'll be the moment you pass away

and I'm Rose or one of us does and one of us is Jack and one of us is Rose but for the most part Don't bother throwing that in at the end. I can see what you think

this dynamic is. You go on to live a merry old life and throw a massive jewel into the water for the most part don't bother throwing that in at the end I can see what you think this dynamic is you go on to live a merry old life and throw a massive jewel into the water and I freeze to death very early on well

listen I'm not going to get into that now I'm just going to end this with the words of the king and the wind blows and a poor no no how does it go and a poor little boy with a runny nose

plays in the wind streamers a cold wind blows to the ghetto. I've just got to have my head in the ghetto. I want to listen to that. Great tune. Great man. Elvis Presley. JT, can you drop in in the ghetto for us?

As we say, from the wolf and the owl, thank you for joining us once again. Take care of yourselves. One last thing. I'm holding out my hand right now for a handshake. Why do these endings always take so long?

I'm holding out my hand for a handshake. Don't worry about where you are, okay? I want you to feel enlightened. Hold out your hand like you're grasping mine. Just shake it gently

and smile and go, thanks for the memories. You got this. It's just, it's, none of it makes any sense why why are we taking

we all we've got to figure out how to end these podcasts well we'll end it with that JT just end it yeah we'll end it with this bit no but before

no but before we do go let me just say from me to you brother to mother brother to brother brother to sister brother to father brother to mother brother to brother brother to sister brother to father brother to son from me life is a roller coaster you know what you got to do you just got to ride it gorgeous

it's just like we just keep we can just keep doing the handshake bit it was really cool right see you next time, guys. Bye-bye. Bye-bye. If you have a problem, opinion, feedback, or anything at all, please email us at wolfowlpod at gmail.com. That's wolfowlpod at gmail.com. We'd love to hear from you, mainly because we don't have any content ideas. Thank you.