Wolf and Owl - Episode 48

Episode Date: November 3, 2021

We’re talking… shiny trench coats, wardrobe classics, body shame issues, different type of laughs and hanging out with TV people. Then a couple of email questions on the rights and wrongs of preferring a quiet night in and sleeping with separate duvets. For any feedback, questions or comments please email us at [e-mail] - we’d love to hear from you. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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We are all connected. Discover Echo from Cirque du Soleil. Opens May 8th under the Big Top at Toronto Lakeshore Boulevard West. Tickets at CirqueDuSoleil.com. Echo. Thanks for presenting partners Sun Life. With Questrade, you can open an FHSA online. No bank appointment needed. It's easy and only takes a few minutes. The sooner you get started, the more time your down payment has to grow. Open an account today at Questrade.com. Outro Music Fuck their censorship. Let them see the whole thing. They stay dressed to kill. Never sheep's clothing. Dark enough to turn the sun to the moon.

You'll see nothing. All you hear is a huff, a puff and a... Expect killings. Red spilling and flesh ripping. Impressive in it. The death bringing, it's head spinning. Just kidding. Every word in this song's about two grown men dressed up as a bird and a dog.

Oh my gosh. What time is it? Do you know what time it is, Tom? Yeah. What time is it? What time is it time it is, Tom? What time is it? Tell him what time it is. Look at your watch. Look at your watch. Look at your watch.

Our time, baby. Oh, shit, shit, shit. Oh my God, inside the place. Woof of the owl. Tell your friends. Margie. Tell your mum. Margie.

Hello, how you doing? Is that an aggression plate number you're wearing there? It is aggression plate. I believe you've got this same track. I've got it in red and blue. Have you? Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's nice.

Aggression's smashing some nice looks. Shout out to Aggression Blake. While we're talking about clothes, I've got something I have to ask you. So in the backdrop of your shot here, there's a trench behind you. Can I ask who that trench belongs to? That is my trench. Okay, thank you, Tom's a trench behind you. Yeah, yeah. Can I ask who that trench belongs to? That is my trench. Okay. Thank you, Tom.

Let me tell you why. Okay. I have been having an ongoing argument with this one. Yeah. Now, let me explain to you what happened. A while ago, I've always liked the idea of rocking a trench. Mate, if anyone I know could rock a trench, right, you could fucking kill a trench.

Right. Thank you. Thank you, bro. So, I ordered a trench a while. You could fucking kill a trench. Right. Thank you. Thank you, bro. So I ordered a trench a while ago. Where from? Cos. I think it is. Now, admittedly, what I would say to you,

slightly longer than I was anticipating. Okay, let's just get that out of the way. It's not like a wedding dress, is it? Has it got a train? Let's just say I can only wear it if Theo's with me. That would be such a sick look. Just walking around Soho like the emperor in his new clothes. Yeah.

Theo wearing an outfit that's the same colour as the trench, just so it all goes together. So that coordinates. No, so anyway, I bought this trench. Yeah. And Lisa said, what the fuck did you buy that for? Those are exact words.

What the fuck did you buy that for? Not in it. I said that more aggressively than she said. Yeah. You know, she said it in a kind of, you know, what's he done?

You know, like, you know, like a sitcom wife rolling her eyes. What's it? What have you done now? Did she do it in front of the kids or just the two of you? No,

she didn't do it in front of the kids, but then two of you? No, she didn't do it in front of the kids. But then we were moving a couple of weeks ago, as you know, and we're packing shit up and she goes, this is not coming with us. I said, well, I've not worn it yet. I said, I don't know how you're rolling, but I'm not rolling like I couldn't afford to give away clothes that I haven't even fucking worn yet. I understand having a bit of a clear out.

Anyway, she goes, just put it on. Mate, I put this coat on. I promise you. I'm not exaggerating. I don't think I've seen her laugh like that in about a year. Really? She had to sit down and wipe tears away from her. She lost her mind at me in this coat.

Now, as I'm talking to you i'm looking at your coat i can't really obviously it's on a zoom thing yours looks like a less kind of my the material on my coat i would describe as sort of there's a sheen to it do you mean that i don't yeah yeah i know so basically you brought mac mac like you brought one like if if it's gonna rain but also it's got a little jew about it yeah yeah it rain. But also, it's got a little jus about it, yeah? Yeah. It's got a little, yeah, it's got a little prominence about that shine. Mate, the thing about a Mac, yeah, let me just tell you, boy. Yeah.

Let me tell you. Go on. If there's one garment that you're ever going to have in your wardrobe that will absolutely, like, inspire you and push you to lose some weight, it's a mech. Because they're not forgiving. No, as soon as you put it on, like... So this week I got a...

I brought my winter coat. I brought a new winter coat. Adidas, nice little number. Like knee length. Fucking sick piece of garm. And I sort of put it on. Catherine was like, oh, my God, that's really, really nice. Then I did it up and she went, why do you do things up like that?

Oh, no. And it sort of like... Did she have that touch? It was like bump and bump. Do you know what I mean? Oh, no. At the front, I looked like a pregnant woman. At the back, I looked like Kim Kardashian.

And I haven't even got a bum, really. But everything was just... You could have gone for pregnant Kim Kardashian and saved a bit of time, doesn't that? You know, because Rio Ferdinand, shout out Rio Ferdinand, my G. No, Rio,

you know Rio always talks about one staple thing that always looks good and should look good on most men, right? It's a decent looking winter parka, right? A nice winter coat

and a white t-shirt underneath, right? Yeah. I can't pull that look off because it just, just looks like I've got a little white friend sticking out of the middle of my coat.

The trouble is when you see someone who looks fucking if you see Rio or David Beckham or someone kind of like swaggy in that look Idris Busset nice. Right?

Idris Busset nice. It looks like, yeah. But if it's like me, you, or like one of our compadres that we know, it's fucking hard,

brother. Yeah. It's hard to bust that off. You know, actually, this is just while we're on there, like, so when we're shooting The Curse,

right, you know, you'll get sort of paps doing a show or whatever. So we've got paps sort of shooting. And like, so I'm in a picture with um my boys uh stevie stamp uh seaper and hugo chedwin right and like those three like hugo looks double drip hugo looks like jason like a smaller version of jason

statham right he's got a cool like yeah seaper's peering out of the door looking so cool steve stamp was in character that day so he's looking Steve has always dressed immaculately right yeah Steve's Steve's got some oh my god Steve Steve like I look at Steve and think man absolutely like he can you know Steve's very very clever with his clothing right very neutral base colors he's literally black and white nearly everything he wears it's fucking incredible man and is that is that do you look at him as somebody that's got a completely different shape to you and think i'm going to model myself in the same way that you do kevin in the same way that you do kevin hart no kevin hart hasn't got that much dissimilar figure to me or you he's quite stocky right steve stamp Stamp. Steve Stamp looks like a Gucci model.

Like, Steve Stamp, like, let me tell you, right? He can put on a beanie, a T-shirt that might not have been washed in about a month that's still a bit fucking knackered, a pair of fucking... No need to fucking weigh him in like that, mate. A pair of ankle swingers, right? And still looks fucking sick-ass. Steve can look like he's literally just put on clothes and look like he's just about put on some put on clothes and look like he's just about to go right we're gonna go for like a fry up and then i've just got to head

over to paris in the fashion week and i'm gonna do all of that in the same outfit steve is well i'll tell you this when i said steve dresses quite well i didn't expect to lose 10 minutes on that but well done i think you made your point anyway go on so it also in the picture is me right in character which isn't yeah but in character picture is me, right? In character, which isn't... Yeah, but in character. But your character looks... Yeah, yeah. You know, you've got a sort of...

You look like a sort of what? Recreational gnomes. But the worst bit of it is my stomach is the thing that... Like, you've got us four actors in it. My stomach takes centre stage. And I genuinely was thinking, I don't feel in bad shape

at the moment i feel like okay about myself i looked at that picture and someone put it in the group chat we've got and i swear i lost about four or five hours the other afternoon just feeling like absolute shit i got up the next morning did a fucking workout i lost nearly 50 i know i saw that yeah you posted you posted about it you posted yeah that's why I did it. I was like, literally, I can't go on like this. There can't be pictures of me still now where I think I'm losing weight and I think I'm looking better, where I still look at a picture

and actually genuinely just sit there thinking, what does that point? I might as well have fish and chips and a battered sausage chaser tonight. No, but that's what happens to me, bro. I think both of us have got the same issue. Yeah, yeah. We've got no problem with exercising, but what happens is me, bro. I think both of us have got the same issue. Yeah, yeah. We've got no problem with exercising.

But what happens is you exercise, right? Yeah. This is my opinion. For example, I've been out for a run today, right? Really, you know, feeling very virtuous about that, right? I guarantee this is what'll happen, right? Yeah. Later on today, I'll be wandering through the house in this tracksuit

that right now I feel like I'm looking stush in, right? I walk past the window, I'll see what I look like and I go, oh, so you're running every morning,

you're doing personal training and this is what it's come to and then I'll go and have a fucking massive sandwich and then later on tonight

I will decide, you know what, fuck it, I'm exercising and I look like shit so I might as well enjoy some aspect. I have this same conversation in my head every night.

You might as well... What the fuck are you going to enjoy? You're exercising. You're exercising your arse off. You look like this. You don't even look good off the back of it. What joy are you getting in your life? What joy are you pushing my wife and children to one side

as it goes to the fridge to fucking load up? Because I feel like that's the only joy I can get in my life. No, you deserve this actually. If you're not going to eat anything, if you're not going to eat something, if you're not going to eat something bad, what's the fucking point of doing any of this?

What's the point of working so on? What's the point of doing any of this? Just fucking eat, Romesh. Do you know what? You've, you've, you've, you've withheld your pleasure from your life for too long. Just fucking have a sandwich, mate.

Go on, stick it in a pan. Deep fry that shit. You deserve it, bro. I sometimes feel like I'm a Bedford van, right? Although it's had a couple of spray jobs and someone's made it look like the A-Team van, maybe, or someone's fucking put a fucking motif on the side of it,

I'm still a fucking shitty, big, fat, old Bedford van. It doesn't matter what I fucking do. I'm just always going to be a Bedford van. You't matter what i fucking do i'm just always gonna be a bedford van you got a fucking yeah and it mate do you know this weekend like yeah on the back of that i had fucking fish and chips i had fucking a child i mean i had a chinese takeaway we had people we had a lot of people over and everyone weird like people with all different dietary requirements and all different some people didn't like chinese some people didn't like indian some people just wanted pasta it was insane yeah i felt like i was running a restaurant i just did legal and christmas special yeah and uh obviously we're wearing christmas jumpers and

like that throughout the throughout the show and uh you know that thing where you go, I'm always a Bedford Van, that thing you just said. It sums up. I have actually feel like I've made a breakthrough, right? Mentally, in a way, right? Because what happened was, I saw Jamie and I saw Fred.

They put on a Christmas jumper and immediately like, it's like those, you know those shoes in Back to the Future? Yeah, yeah. Back to the Future where he presses a button and then they just shrink to size and they're perfect. That's what I feel every item of clothing does on Freddie

and David's bodies. It's incredible. They put on a jumper and it just accentuate abs, make your chest look incredible, look like you've got a Roman chest plate, shoulders look broad and sexy. All of that happens. And then I put it on and it's like, make him look like a bridge troll,

destroy any self-esteem he's got left, right? Right, so it used to aggravate me. But now, do you know what I've done? I just accepted it. I am not supposed to look... That is just not... It's not in my thing. In the list of things that people are going to say that Romesh is good at,

wearing clothes, looking good in clothes, it's just not one of them. And that is... No, but I just not one of them. And that is, you just accept that. Why don't you accept that? My friend, Danny, who's a very fucking fashion conscious dude, fucking very cool guy, he said to me, Romesh has got it fucking sussed with what he wears.

He said, I think, he was watching you on the Ranganation, and he was saying how, like, well turned out you are on that. I think, look, if I'm honest with you, you had Neil Ruddock on that, right? And I'm like, he's actually quite inspiring in the fact that he just doesn't give a fuck.

Totally. I'm actually like, as a big guy, I'm like... He's just shaking his arse and like fucking... Mate, he's like... Just going for it. He's just going for it. And he's just going for it. And I'm just thinking,

I don't think bad of him for it. I'm watching him go. Mate, I fucking salute Neil Ruddock. This man has got the body confidence of a fucking Adonis. He's just got the confidence of an absolute G. But do you know,

do you know the thing about it? It makes him an attractive bloke. Yeah, yeah. It makes him a more attractive bloke because, you know, just somebody going, you know, I do this. We'll be getting changed.

We'll be putting outfits on. I'm saying to the costume people, I'm sure you sorry about my body. That's my favourite voice you've ever done. I'm not even getting droopy. I'm so sorry about my body. I've got to get changed now to try and look away

because I don't look like Jamie and Freddie, I'm afraid. Mitch, you just got one woman from costume who's just stroking your hair the whole time. Oh, mate.

I did it on fucking when I did Holby City, bro. Like, I had to... Look at you dropping shit hard. Oh, mate. I did it on fucking when I did Holby City, bro. Like, I had to... They, um... Look at you dropping shit hard. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's right, yeah. Mate.

Yeah. Listen, you talk about... You talk about... You talk about Wonka and Paddington too and I'll fucking tell you about my stint in Holby. How many episodes did you do?

I only did one episode. Oh, I didn't know if you were... So, when I... When I had to go there, there's a bit where I... Where I had to, um... I had to have surgery. So, what they've got if you were... So when I had to go, there's a bit where I had to have surgery. So what they've got to do is

they've got to do like a freeze frame of my face. And then they put in like a prosthetic of my body so they can operate, obviously. I wasn't getting paid enough for them to actually fucking open up my chest cavity. But like, so I had to be measured up for a prosthetic. Wow. And so I go back there and then this girl comes,

like this prosthetics girl comes out she goes can you come in here please i go go into this little room and she goes right i just need you to take your top off and i took my top off and honestly like i said that as a joke to you just now i genuinely said to her i'm so sorry about my body right because because you've just because you've just met someone and then they take you into a room, and then I take my top off, right? Lisa didn't, like, Lisa, look, I've got to tell you something. This is fucking embarrassing.

This is what I'm about to tell you. It's fucking embarrassing. When Lisa and I, Lisa and I, Lisa and I first got together at, like, we were on a night out, and then I went back to her place right and we were talking about that first night that we like

hooked up or whatever like a long time later I said to her was there anything what did you think about me what was your first impressions at that all that time ago

she goes do you know one of the one of the weirdest the only thing that I thought was like I really liked you I thought you were like sounding and everything she goes you know the only thing that I thought was like a really large shirt, I thought you were like sounding and everything. She goes, you know, the only thing that I thought was really weird about you. I go, what?

She goes, the fact that you kept your shirt on. Jesus, bro. What, through the whole night? Mate, I had a fucking button-up shirt. Fucking waking up in a Fred Perry or a fucking Ben Sherman all done up to the fucking neck.

Top collar, all the way up to the top. Did you sleep all right? Yeah, I was all right. Quite hot, quite hot. Your shirt's kind of got sweat patches and stuff on it. It's so strange that you're wearing no underpants. Just a pair of fucking socks and a fucking Ben Sherman. Yeah, why are you in bed

like you're about to do a Zoom meeting? Like you've shat yourself and someone's just going to get you a pair of pants and new jeans for a lost property. And the reason for that is is because I just thought, I genuinely, in my head,

there's part of me that thought, if I take my shirt off, she's going to go, oh, hold on a second. I didn't realise that's what I was dealing with. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Could you please leave? so that was with lisa the love of the the woman that went on to be the love of my life right she she had to wait this woman i've met this woman 30 seconds ago and then i go into a room and she asked me to take my top off right that's why i was like in my head

it was just like so messed up and that's why I went, I'm sorry about my body. And what we don't realise is that is not attractive. Women, they don't suddenly go, oh, thanks, you've made me more comfortable about this. What they go is, oh, my God, you're actually thinking about what your body looks like to me in this scenario. That's weird. That's so fucking weird.

But you don't want to go the other way and just go that's what I'm dealing with, measure up silently, I reckon silently taking your top off and just sort of like if you were to take your top off and then chat about anything else that's like anything else in life apart from the fact don't say I'm sorry about my body

don't say apologies for this it's just a bit cold in here don't say anything like that about my body don't say apologies for this it's just a bit cold in here don't say anything like that it's you just talk about something else because this woman

I'm making it about me bro I'm like you know I've got to take my top off she's got to measure up she's got to fucking measure me up and then I go

sorry about my body and then she's suddenly nervous about what numbers she has to write down because she thinks if she writes down what my actual measurements are

I might start crying with my top off in this tiny room with her. Do you know what I mean? Horrible. Mate, when we had to do this when we did League of Their Own

and I'll tell you that's one of the moments of my life that I was like oh my god. You were in the middle and one side of you is Adam Peaty

arguably has one of the best bodies probably in the world, right? He's got one of the best bodies in the middle, and one side of you is Adam Peaty, arguably who has one of the best bodies probably in the world, right? He's got one of the best bodies in the universe. He's almost like He-Man, Adam Peaty. Michelangelo's David is jealous of Adam Peaty. Yeah, Adam Peaty's body is absolutely rocking, and I'm next to him, and we're about to go into a fucking cold drop fucking ice bath thing. I looked across at Adam Peaty, and I was like,

look, even when we were both getting changed and they tried to give me a pair of Speedos, I was like, as funny as I think this will be, I'm not wearing Speedos standing next to Adam Peaty. Like, that is just going to be... I'm going to be honest with you. I found it very difficult to film that with you. And I'll tell you why.

Because I knew that we were looking for the comedy in that situation. But at the same time, my heart was going out to you because I think to myself, I don't... Why not kick back with a cold, smooth

bush? Bush. Smooth taste. Great value. Bush Lager. Enjoy responsibly. Must be legal drinking age. Best Western made booking our family beach vacation a breeze. And it felt a little like... Good night, kids.

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it's not like it's not like you and I feel great when we're stood on our own let alone next to one of the fucking most chiseled feet I've ever seen in my life

a very humble lovely man as well shout out to Adam Peaty oh what a bloke what a bloke he was genuinely going to me because I was doing that thing I was standing next to Adam Peaty backstage going I what a bloke. He was genuinely going to me because I was doing that thing. I was standing next to Adam Peaty backstage going,

I feel like a piece of shit next to you. And he went, yeah, you're all right. You look quite, your shoulders are not, you know, got good push. And then he starts trying to go through a routine that I could do, like at home, that he could give me that would make my attributes look better. And I'm just staring at him thinking, you know how fucking long it would take even to look like a... Unless one of the steps of the

routine involves pulling out a fucking magic wand. I don't think it's going to have a thing. By the way, I will tell you this as well. When we were getting in that cold thing, someone just before we went and said, have you ever had any heart problems? And I went, well, no, I don't think so. You never know i mean fucking amazing like amazingly fit people have fucking had heart

problems in the recent times and didn't know about it and they went are you overweight i said look at me i'm standing in a pair of fucking pants in front of you are you over the reason the reason you designed this item was because you wanted to see me are you overweight you tell me is literally the most redundant pathetic question in this scenario i'm sad that we look like if you were to go to a fucking school and go like this is what happens if you take care of yourself and shows adam peaty this is what happens if you drink and eat all the wrong foods and don't exercise that's how we look if you ask me if i'm overweight and i say no does that mean i'm not allowed to do this because i've obviously got mental issues

right so i'm standing there and then they said well you need to be very careful with your heart because of the cold in there what are you supposed to do with that advice? Do you know the lowest part of this, right, would be standing next to your best friend who's already, I could see the sympathy in your eyes, right? Freddie, bless him, trying to tell me that I looked well and I looked in good shape. Jamie just absolutely fucking laughing like a hyena because that's his perfect kind of fucking angle of humour.

And all I could think of is like, well, if i have a fucking heart attack at this moment the cameras are going to be on me that's always going to be the fucking shit right that's going to be the thing yeah i will devoid my bow and i'll be lying here in a fucking ice bath with feces and piss floating in it i would fucking love it just you cried in the tank as a fucking floater just emerges. You're trying to pull me out of it. It's alright, no, I can't put it through this anymore.

He's a mate. You would have just leave it. You would have a defibrillator, like that. Adam Peaty giving me mouth to mouth. The team's still rolling on it because they think this is good. Jamie's still laughing. Now, leave him, Rob.

No, Rob, turn the defibrillator up. Turn it up to the mouth. Put it on his bonnet. Let's see what happens. Put the defibrillator on his bonnet. Try and burn his chest there. Frazzle his nipples. Try and frazzle his nipples.

Freddie just running up and pulling your trunks off. it up and pulling your trunks off. Oh my God. But I think you've got to find your, like you say, I think you've got to try and find your, you've got to try and like hit the fucking vibe of just going, this is what

it is. This is who I am. You know when Gok Wan used to do How To Look Good Naked, right? And I used to get so pissed off because well, you know when you know when Gok Wan used to do How To Look Good and I used to get so pissed off because well you know the principle of that show

is basically making the person feel comfortable with how they look and I always thought okay this is a fucking sham but actually

I just do think there's so much truth in that man it's like you know this whole my tendency is to be cynical about that right

and go it's just a load of shit you know blah blah but you know body image issues if you if you're not happy with your body you can't just suddenly change that and and think you look sexier and it's not about that but i think it's about just having confidence in yourself and i know i know that sounds like a fucking something i don't know but you're true can i just jump in on the Gok Wan thing? Right? When Gok Wan was making that fucking show, right?

He lived around the corner in Bermondsey from me, right? One night we were in the same pub and someone sort of, someone knew us both a bit. And they introduced me to Gok Wan. He looked me up and down and he had this sort of like, sort of smirk on his face. And then he went over to the people he was with and I saw them chatting for a bit and then i saw them all look over at me and they all started laughing fuck off did that really happen yeah and like maybe they did maybe you know what he could have walked over

and gone oh that guy was really funny tom said something i said i don't think i said anything that funny but then sometimes you know my uh you know things that i don't think are particularly funny i can say something quite earnest and then people think that it's a hilarious anecdote um but it was the way it happened it was very genuinely i spent the whole day like you know when you see see people and they're just pulling down their top or like like sort of making them sort of like pulling at their clothes just because they feel really uncomfortable that was me after that i was like this guy's job is to make people feel better about themselves and And I genuinely, I remember just thinking, I have to go to another pub, actually.

I don't know why. It's a weird one, isn't it? Because it's impossible to know. I mean, listen, that doesn't sound great, if I'm being honest with you. But to sort of play devil's advocate a little bit, I have been in situations where i've been walking with a mate or you or you're sitting in an office or something and someone comes in and says something and then seconds after they walk away you make a joke about something unrelated and

then you all start laughing and then you think and then it occurs to me that that person could very well think that we're laughing about them that happens a lot but they did all of me the whole group of about five of them stared over at me. Yeah, but it might have been like this. That bloke there, you see that Tom Davis? What a fucking legend.

And also, by the way, he just looks like he's got... The way he's dressed, the way he's carrying himself, I really like that, don't you? Yeah. And then he goes, hold on,

and then he goes, not like me. Look what I'm wearing. I look like a right piece of shit. Then everyone starts laughing. I mean, that could have happened, couldn't it? Romesh,

my job is to be laughed at. If there's one thing that i know is different laughs right i know the different laughs that you get i know a laugh of someone looking at me going he's amazing look at me i'm a piece of shit i know the laugh of that go no you're not that laugh i also know the laugh of oh my god i just met this guy at the bar look at he's over there look look what he's wearing orange trainers oh my god he's like 34 why is he dressed like that that i know that laugh i'm being very very just here by the way i'm being very because i could i could go in but i'm not i choose not to you could what you as in you're holding back here is that what yeah you know what me of about two years ago would go in two-footed here but yeah you know that isn't that i don't really particularly i just remember at the time feeling absolutely dog shit about that and thinking like

wow like that's a really that's a pretty harsh thing to have like you know to do but then also thinking i'd be i'd be lying if i hadn't said that. I've been in situations where sort of someone said something, you've looked over and sort of laughed at something, you know? Yeah. Every time, every time you, Laura and the others would look across at me on King Garry,

there'd be some sort of laughter off the back of it. And then you, and then you, and then you come over and sort of go, oh, we were just saying that you really were good in that scene. If it doesn't feel like that's what you were saying. No,

look, your whole character there was like fucking designed. So that was your, the. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But you don't treat that person like that every minute of the day.

I never did that. You're such a little liar. You love it so much. Look, all I'm saying is, yeah. And look, you know what?

I like Got One Show. And maybe, yeah, I don't know. We'll never get to the back, but unless he comes on this podcast and we discuss it, and I'm not doing that. We're not having one guest and it's not going I like Got One show. And maybe, I don't know. We'll never get to the back, but unless he comes on this podcast and we discuss it, and I'm not doing that.

We're not having one guest and it's not going to be Got One. No. And that feels like a weird move. After all the people that we talked about to get someone that you've got sort of

on the edges of beef with. Yeah, yeah. But look, I would, I can't comment on that. Rob and I filmed with Gok and he's very nice. But listen,

that sounds like, well, it sounds difficult to sort of interpret another way, doesn't it? Yeah, but also, maybe Gok was like, the thing about, and this is an interesting thing,

is the thing, maybe he's uncomfortable and he's with people he doesn't know and he's with company that he doesn't know and Gok's gone over and he's made a joke

to chill him in that circumstance. Because that's the other thing that I get. He could have. Had you done Merger in Success for him? No, no, no, no, no. I've done a few bits. I was sort of very much new to the industry.

Just off the back of that, by the way, that feels like, it feels like quite a cut and dried thing. But one of the things that i found is i constantly constantly in the situations where there are other people from television around like for example the most times it's come up is like an awards night and i would say the nta's is the absolute epitome of this for me right i have never repeatedly felt like i was talking to people that were while they were talking to me looking to someone else to talk to. I mean, it is fucking...

Like, in terms of going to a thing that you're supposed to be part of, but feeling like a huge outsider, I would say the NTAs is up there for that, right? There's other things that are like that, but that's peak for me. Also, the NTAs is a weird one, because your stock is

completely wrapped around how many followers, how famous, how many followers you have, what you look like in a tuxedo. It's completely that five. I've been to NTAs, never been nominated or anything.

I've been to a couple of them. One of the most weird situations I have had there, I was in a box from, I think it was ITV box and with some good people and then sort of you know that thing of like uh the show comes to an end and everyone starts drifting in and out of different boxes and I end up pretty much in a whole box on my own with Ross Kemp and like next door there was like people from TOWIE and whatever and whatever it's called Cheshire Wives or whatever like really you think when people walked in and opened the door they thought this room must be themed people walked in i'm not joking

they looked at this deep conversation which wasn't really deep of me and ross kemp standing on this balcony and just walked out again it was like the most intense conversation i've ever had in my life one of the most intense i like like let me shout out ross kemp by the way because i genuinely nice guy right i mean i i like i think he's like quite eccentric and and he's he's a bit of a character but in a way he's everything that i think actors and people in the public eye should be you know what i stood there for a while he at one point often you know he wanted me to write my sitcom and like you know for a while. At one point,

he wanted me to write him a sitcom. It's all went about in a real way. He's like, what do you do? You write sitcoms, yeah? That's great. Maybe you should write me something. I was like, oh, I'm just doing my own work. He went, yeah, yeah, but something with me would be really good

because actually probably some of the parts you're playing, I could play. And he was very like, yeah, quite... And conversely, if you follow that train of logic, some of the parts that I'm writing that I could play. And he was very like, yeah, quite... And conversely, Ross, if you follow that train of logic, some of the parts that I'm writing that I could play, that you're thinking about for you, I could play. So why the fuck would I involve you?

But you know that, when you're standing there talking to someone who's so masculine, I was constantly thinking at some point an arm wrestle might be on there, and that would be the worst thing. But I remember distinctly like Arj and Joe Swash walking into the room and sort of like looking at me and Ross Kemp and sort of like rolling their eyes and sort of

running into the next room and sort of then I heard like another roar of laughter and then you sort of look on Twitter and it says Tom Davis and Ross Kemp is the couple that we didn't know we needed it literally looks like a man looking into a mirror. Find someone that looks at you the way that Tom Davis

looks at Ross Kemp in the ITV box. It's a weird world, isn't it, when you get into this? I find it really tricky. Not tricky. Tricky is not the right thing. I feel like an outsider in it. But I do also think that it's probably wrong to assume not tricky tricky is not the right thing i think i find it i feel like an outsider in it but i i do but i do also think that it's probably wrong to assume that not loads of people aren't feeling

like that you know you can walk through a thing and think oh my god i feel like such an outsider it's probably most people feel like that a lot of people feel like that people there are people that aren't there are people that you just look and they look completely comfortable in that scenario and a fucking buzzing off of it i'm'm just not that type. But I do think people that are like you and I gravitate towards each other. That's why you and me are such good mates. That's why I'm such good mates with Beckett.

That one where me and you were genuinely just stood in the sort of light. She was like oh, if someone was to get a time machine and take me and you back to the ages of anywhere between probably about seven and fucking 21 right there would be we could we could have gone through any of the parties of that situation i mean you

pretty much would have just been standing while the party happens around us watching the people have a good time the weird thing of that is like i remember me and you go like you know let's just go because whatever and then like the next day sort of a couple of people would text me that mean you were chatting to and they were like i wasn't really feeling it either and i was like but you were like a dancing on a table when i left yeah i know it's so weird doesn't it but some people are just able to sort of well no two things i think there's two things one some people are able to hide it two some people like saying that they don't like doing something but you know like people go oh my god it's an absolute nightmare wasn't it and you go all right because you stayed till three and you and you and then afterwards you went on like you went and carried

on at another venue so that when i first when i first got into the this i used to just get absolutely fucking like the idea of like a free bar was just just something that was so alien to me. I don't remember I'd ever been in a situation, probably maybe two weddings in my life, where there'd been an absolute free bar, where anything you wanted was free. That was just so fucking... At the time, I was probably drinking more,

and I used to just literally just make that my thing. And that probably then, if I went back, I probably looked like I was having a lot better time than I actually was because I was fucking absolutely leathered that's a cautionary tale I mean you've partied a bit this weekend though

so we did Hip Hop Saved My Halloween and I was quite tired we'd just finished we rapped on a league of their own and then I got home

had a couple of hours at home watched Man United Spurs, and then got ready to go out. I bet you enjoyed that. That was absolutely delicious. But then on the way to the night, I was like, I'm so fucking tired.

And it starts at 11, finished at four. I was like, how am I going to do this? But mate, what a night. It was so much fun. You were there till 4am? Yeah, I was, yeah. Wowzers.

I don't know if I've got that came in said to Lisa said to Lisa looks like the party animal still lives and she said to me I'm trying to sleep

do you want to go downstairs you shat yourself yeah do you want to take your shirt off your costume looked amazing oh the Jaffee Jaffa yeah it was so fucking hot though, man.

So hot. And then Martin, too smooth. Love Martin. Hip hop saved my life DJ, my tour DJ. He said, I think we should play Lion King. And when you come on. Doesn't make, like, because already, there's quite a few young people in there

that don't really, I'm 100% sure what my costume was. Feels very confusing. They're just sort of watching, going, is there a fat Asian guy in Lion King? I don't fucking remember that. Simba! So let's be clear. When it comes to shipping internationally,

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on now. Dine-in only until 11am. Right, should we do some emails, my G? Let's do it, my baby. Okay. Bear with me. I just want to choose the correct first one. The swan's still busting.

He's hard. She is, yeah. You know what the swan's like. She don't fuck about, mate. Actually, this sort of thematically links in with what we've been talking about. I can't believe I said thematically there. What a cock. Hello to the wolf and owl.

This is from Anonymous. First, I just want to say big love to you. Do you mind if I sort of want to put some stank on you? Yeah, put some stank, man. You look like you've got some stank in you. Yeah. Hello to the Wolf and Owl. First of all, just want to say big love to you guys for the pod.

My boyfriend introduced it to me a couple of months back. I can honestly say, listen, you both really have to feel a little less anxious about life. So can I thank you enough for that? And of course, thank you to The Swan for picking my email and taking the time to read it. I am currently 20 years old and studying at university, but I've really been struggling to enjoy a night out. I'd be very much loving going to bed at 11pm and casual

drinking to 4am doesn't really do it for me. Doesn't mean I don't enjoy it on occasion, but it often just leaves me wishing I stayed at home. The issue is all my friends are big party people. So I do just feel like I'm missing out and being a massive party pooper how do I get my mojo back or do I just learn to accept it's not who I am at the moment big love, anonymous, Tom Davis yo, anonymous number one, I love your vibe if there's one superpower that I have within my brain

is the fact that I can listen to Ramesh, do an email and decide automatically that you are an incredible human being. And you know what? Let that incredible, incredibleization just, Oh mate.

Oh mate. Let that incredibleization just fucking flow through you. Right. Listen, I'm going to be fucking real here. Break it down. Some real talk. Yeah.

JT, hit some like, just sort of like really sort of dramatic tones. You ain't got to do anything you don't want to do, sister. Preach! Preach to me! You ain't got to go anywhere you don't want to go, yo! Ladder for the people at the back! You just need to do you, yo!

Listen, the truth of the matter is, I spend a lot of time and a lot of shit nights out with people doing things fucking out till four or five in the morning. Then I had to be there because maybe I'll miss out on saying that there'll be an incredible moment of this night that everyone would talk about and we'd go down and folklore. And the truth of the matter is, the only nights that ever seemed to happen was maybe the nights I wasn't there because everyone there fucking talks about stuff and sort of throws stuff up in this fucking acclaim that just seems more crazy than it ever was. I've never been in my fucking life really, I don't think, to a party that's gone on after midnight. There's anything but a load of fucking people talking about how amazing they are. Or talking about fucking really stuff that should be talked about.

There's mental health issues it should be discussed over a coffee and a croissant at 10 a.m on a saturday morning when you're not fucking hanging and you're not fucking oh that's truth you're hearing oh break this down break this down snap another little bit off y'all because there's another bit coming at you girl yeah there's gonna be times in your life that the party sir is gonna be there and you're ready for the fucking waves y'all and you just want to be fucking riding those to the beach and that's to be times in your life that the party surf is going to be there and you're ready for the fucking wave, y'all. And you just want to be fucking riding those to the beach. And that's going to be times that you need that little person that's part of your personality.

That might come back. That might be something that you're 20 years old, 25, 26, 27. That might be you. That might even be you at 30. I don't know. For me, it came, it fluctuated at times. Like I say, I spent most of my 20s like in pubs searching for something that i never ever ever found i spent a long time like like going to the

pub every night of the week because i was scared i was going to miss something i was every night every night y'all and if i didn't go i remember missing one i genuinely can remember not going to this pub one night and coming back and saying, everyone's, oh, you should have been there last night. You should have been there last night. And, like, no one could really put their finger on why I should have been there. But for the rest of the fucking, about five years after that, I made God sure that I was there every night

just in case the thing that I'd missed, that no one really knew what it was, ever happened again. Like, genuinely, don't fucking feel you you have to be anyone that you're not enjoy fucking early nights you know because there'll be times and and you know what pick those those nights you go out and you get shit out of it pick them pick them you know because you got you've got something about you you've realized this at a very young age and at 20 yo i was still digging on fucking beaches looking for a treasure that I thought was

under the sand but was in the sky yo keep it real and yo I've never said this more honestly than I'm gonna say it

right now just do you I tried to do like a supportive kind of I feel like

it was I feel like it was distracting it was nice you know what you felt like you felt like my mate Egg feel like it was distracting it was nice you know what you felt like oh god you felt like uh my mate eggy steve who was like no no I mean it's the nicest possible way but he was what he was one of the guys who'd always be out at like that time yeah oh really like he'd be the kind of guy you'd find with no top on just a pair of jeans and no shoes on. Well, that sounds exactly like me, as you know.

Yeah, but Rob, Rob, Rob. I just literally told you I had to be seeing my wife for three months before I allowed her to see the top half of my body. Yeah, right. Yeah, Rob. Drop a little bit of knowledge on this. Yeah, okay. So listen, first of all, Anonymous, let me tell you this. There is absolutely nothing you have to do.

Let me tell you that, all right? If you like going to bed at 11, you like relaxing with a box set or whatever, just having a nice quiet night, that's absolutely fine. There is nothing wrong with you. The pressure, the social pressure of when you go to university, you've got to be fucking on it all the time. That's fine for people that want to do that, but you don't have to do that. You don't have to, that's not how you have to enjoy your life. And if your friends are like

big party people, you know, if they're proper friends of yours, you know, they can have a night in with you. You can do something a bit different, mix it up. They'll actually probably be grateful for that, to be honest with you. It is nice when you have quiet nights, it makes you appreciate the big nights a bit more. So actually, you're providing a very decent service for your friends. So what I would say to you, Anonymous, you do not have

to change at all. If that's what you want to do, you do that. I want you to not spend a single second more judging yourself. I've got a feeling that Big Night Rom's coming out of the shadows there. Okay. That sounded

horrible. That is a horrible nickname. Big Night Rom. Four-headed Rom. Yo! Guys, who wants to come

back to mine? Theo. Listen, honestly, no, no, no, I'll put some chips in the oven and we'll put some tunes on.

Theo, what's your dad doing now? Oh, my dad's a big night rum. The only thing I'd say to you

anonymous, in all seriousness, which is kind of, Tom's made it slightly difficult for me to segue into this sort of bit of advice,

is sometimes you can psychologically get yourself into a situation where you feel like you don't want to go out and I've had this where I've sort of thought I don't want to go out and then i've gone out and it's been great and i'm a i'm a real bad flake in terms of like cancelling on people i am one of the worst

people in the game for sort of as the night arrives as the night gets closer just going i can't do it guys because when it comes to i just think oh fuck you know it feels like a big effort and stuff and on the occasions where I've just gone, oh, I've got to do this, this is bad, I've had a good time. So if the reason that you're wanting to go to bed early is because you want to go to bed early, that's absolutely fine. But is it possible that there's a psychological barrier you're putting up to going out and, you know,

just go and give it a go and see if you like it. But if you don't, you don't. You don't need to judge yourself. Yeah. I think basically that's the same advice as just a year, yeah? Sure, yeah. If that's... I mean, should we do 100 emails

and you can just say just a year at the end of each one? We could get through these much quicker. I'm doing this thing where I'm trying to cater the advice to each individual problem. Mate, I cater, yo. But also, I always fucking just like people to know that they're already amazing they've already got the ingredients

all they need is the seasoning but seasoning is ingredients you know that you prick late man oh big night rum big night rum's coming out again I'd love to go on a snag I didn't know you who's going Oh, Big Night Rom. Big Night Rom's coming out again.

I'd love to go on a snag deal where I didn't know you. Who's going? Yeah, Cheesy Steve's going. Eggie. Big Dog. Big Night Rom. No, listen. Look, look, look.

I know all those people are coming, but you've got to tell me what I want to hear. Tell me he's coming. Who are you talking about you know who I'm talking about is he coming Big Night Rom yeah

you bet your fucking arse Big Night Rom's coming you know when you hear about someone like that as well it always turns out to be like a real kind of vanilla to them

do you know what I mean yeah I know they did one crazy thing in like 1999 and it's like yeah like shat in someone's shoe or something

after a party in 1997 and then forever forever they know it's fucking honestly there's no telling what he's gonna do i'll tell you what he will do for definite tell that story about shitting in that shoe from 20 years ago he'll just stare over when he knows someone else is telling it um actually but the thing is though tom i was out i was out till four but my energy was very similar to this i didn't suddenly i don't become different mate i i saw a couple of videos you on it that you you re-put out on instagram you dancing around and looking very i i it made me happy man watching you watching you look you looked at one with yourself you know you in a way

you know what you look like like okay here we go here we go. This is a fucking nice thing. Yeah. I said, here we go. The truth of the matter is we never saw the after party to Cinderella's marriage. You look like, that's how I could imagine Cinderella was. What does that mean?

She'd have really enjoyed it. Cause you're fucking just, this is the thing she'd been waiting for. She'd been like fucking working for her three sisters and the fucking, Oh, do you mean after the wedding? After the wedding? Yeah. Oh, right. Yeah. Yeah. No. Yeah. Yeah. So Prince Charming was like, do you mean after the wedding after the wedding yeah oh right yeah yeah

yeah so Prince Charming was like do you want to go to bed now and she's like nah I've got one more thing to do and then she fucking basically put on a club night for people that listen to her podcast yeah okay I thought it was I thought the explanation was going to be slightly less literal than that, but all right.

Oh, my God. oh my god alright so this next email is from is from the goose yo the goose big up yourself goose big up yourself for goose so the wonderful

sweet sweet souls are the swan wolf for now thank you so much for the time and effort that goes into this amazing podcast I firmly believe

it's the best podcast out there so thank you thank you uh thank you guys for listening my point for discussion is this happily married couples or otherwise having separate duvets my wife and i transitioned to the separate duvet life a couple of years ago and haven't looked back the warmer of the couple can easily cool down and the cooler the couple can easily warm up different togs can be bought and also

different sizes bed covers the lot there's no more waking up with the duvet taken away from you unintentionally you can still get both under you can still both get under one duvet for tv movie nights etc etc i see what he means yeah i think i'm gonna grind it uh overall we see no negatives at all as you can probably tell we're advocates we're interested in hearing your opinions Tom first of all before we get into this you and the cat are you a single diva

we're a single diva but you know what I'm saying that we've got the one thing I don't want to come across like fucking some kind of Puff Daddy vibes here, or P. Diddy or whatever he calls himself these days. I have an emperor bed.

So it's seven foot by seven foot. It's a lovely big bed. Wow. Yeah, it's a nice bit of kit. And on that bed I have the accompanying duvet, which is seven foot by seven foot. So seldom is there a time where we have the struggle of one of us pulling the duvet off.

There's enough duvet to go around for two people, you know. If you like, if we were a pasty, I'd be the big meat filling and the cat would be, you know, the potatoes or the onions. Like, yeah. What the fuck? That's horrible. What does that mean? No, because the meat brings out the bulk of the fucking pasty.

And then you have a smothering. Oh, I see. Right. But they're all mixed in together. Yeah, yeah, yeah. What's going on there? Yeah. Yeah.

It was the first thing that came to my mind when I thought about our sleeping situation. So I guess, is the advice, advice some that you're asking the advice get yourself a tv crew that's lucrative enough for you to buy an emperor bed is that what you're suggesting no no what i'm going to say to you is there has been times however that i actually think like your own duvet where you can you can either you know you can do your tortilla burrito wrap on yourself so you can wrap yourself completely in a duvet which is quite nice and quite like uh snuggly or there's a time where you know you you might just fucking like have it just halfway down your body and like leave your

top half you know my favorite do you know what my favorite thing yeah i can imagine you like doing the cornetto no i don't know you know what i like doing one leg in one leg out beautiful thing oh my god I love it I love it so nice what's this one like is she

with a duvet she if I'm going to be honest I can imagine she's probably an absolute saint when it comes to the duvet

yeah why do you what are you basing that on because I just think as a person she's such a decent human being like yeah

I can imagine if there was one piece of toilet paper left in your whole house What are you basing that on? Because I just think as a person, she's such a decent human being. Like, yeah. I can imagine if there was one piece of toilet paper left in your whole house, that you would get that piece of toilet paper and there wouldn't be any argument about it. I'd be honest with you. To answer that question honestly, I think if that was the situation, we would...

So explain to me the details of the scenario. There's one square of toilet tissue in the whole house and she and I need a shit simultaneously. Well, yeah, maybe like you've both, it's the morning after, you've both had a big, big dinner the night before. Obviously, you've had a vegan dinner, so your tummy's a little bit more erratic maybe

because you've had a lot of root vegetables. And then you wake up and Lisa shouts up the stairs, Rom, Rom! And you're like, what the bloody hell is it? And she's like, there's only one square of toilet paper left in the whole house. The kids are like, staying at your mum's. Right? So then you just come leathering

it out of your bedroom and you're like, for fuck's sake, I need this shit as well. Right? There's one square. I guarantee the swan would go, you take it. You take it. It's interesting.

I would say one square is as useful as no squares, wouldn't you? I mean, are you just one square in it? No, no. I'm about 12 square in it. Well, I'm trying to cut down now because of the ozone. Oh, yeah? Yeah, because of the ozone.

Yeah, because of the environment. Yeah, so what are you trying to do then? Well, you've got to twist and double Oh yeah? Yeah, because of the environment. So what are you trying to do then? Well, you've got a twist and double, right? Yeah, you do. And sometimes I sort of create different shapes to really get something purchased and really get up in there. In the 90s and early part of this century

when we didn't know about the ozone layer and we just thought it was a bit of a whatever. It was just something that fucking hippies talked about. Letting dogs fucking run free with toilet rolls and shit like that. Mate, as i'm looking at you out my window now my neighbors uh tied a whole toilet roll to their um well i hope there's been a storm here last night so it's either halloween dressing or basically my neighbor's got a whole big shitty toilet roll in a fucking country um but yeah i'm just looking at thinking man like yeah i mean there was a time, yeah, that was gold for us, toilet paper.

It was probably the biggest fucking commodity on earth. So you need to respect it now, don't you? I think, you know what, actually, if there's one thing that we should have all learned is that, you know, the humble shit ticket, you know, went from something we all took for fucking granted to something that people would get a knife fight outside a supermarket for. There's one thing, and that shows you actually that, you know, sometimes the things that we should respect are the sort of like the most humble.

I don't think there's anything more humble in the world on earth at the moment, more humble and less arrogant than toilet paper. Yeah, you've got to stop doing this, where you sort of give something as the most prominent example, and then you say it's this thing because it happens to be the thing we've been talking about. No, I'm just saying.

No, you always do this. I want you to think about what you've said. And all I want you to do is, an hour after we finish doing this podcast, I want you to think about what you've said. And all I want you to do is, an hour after we finish doing this podcast, I want you to think, do you still believe that toilet tissue is the most humble thing in the world? Right?

I can tell you that. Do you believe it's the most humble thing in the world? If toilet paper... I guarantee you, later on today, you're going to head on out or something. You're going to be wearing one of your Baker Boy hats. And someone's going to go, I love you in that hat.

And you're going to go, you know what? First of all, let me tell you this. One of the things that people don't know about me is I can wear any hat. I look good in any hat. Yeah, we do know this about you, Tom, because you say it. You open almost every conversation with it. And let me tell you something else.

The most absolutely humble thing in the world, there is nothing more humble and self-effacing than the Baker Boy hat. You go, really? It's like this morning, Ron was saying that you said it was a toilet chair. Oh, no, no, no, no. That was, I mean, in that context. No, the Baker Boy, trust me. Nothing more humble.

Let me throw this out there. Let me throw this out there. I'm going to double down because that's the only way I fucking know. I think if toilet paper was a person, it would be Jesus. Like, genuinely. Like, if you break it down and think about it logically, like, Jesus was very humble, like, when he was starting out and he was a little baby.

He was like, his dad was a carpenter, his mum was a virgin, right? He didn't know about fucking, like, he was very poor, right? Completely overlooked. How is any of this like toilet tissue? Because for centuries... Absolutely none of this is like toilet tissue. For centuries, we've overlooked toilet paper. The only similarity is they both come from wood.

Right, yeah, right. And we haven't even mentioned that. We overlooked toilet paper for so long, right? What do you mean we overlooked toilet paper for so long? It was invented. It was created to solve a problem. was everyone everyone he didn't know how much he was needed until the fucking shit hit the well yeah shit hit the fan literally right and then all of a sudden when fucking we needed fucking like all the miracles that he performed and all the fucking

amazing shit he did when he was going out and pronouncing his sermons, right? And doing his fucking thing. All of a sudden you go, well, fucking there's a guy we needed. Hey, who is this guy? Oh, he's the son of God, but he was brought up as a carpenter, okay? Think about toilet paper.

When the pandemic kicked off and it was the one thing we all wanted, it became the biggest selling thing globally. Like everyone wanted it. It didn't matter if you're Richard Branson or you were like Carl and Lisa who live up the street. Everybody needed that sweet, sweet toilet paper.

It was fucking... How is that like Jesus? Because everyone needed religion back in the olden days. And that's what Jesus gave everyone. I don't think Jesus gave everyone religion. He gave everyone hope. And that's what toilet paper did in a way

I feel like it's offensive but I can't quite figure out why I've got all the time in the world for Jesus and toilet paper I love in equal measures I wouldn't do that either in church services,

you would like Body of the Christ to be toilet tissue? No, no. Keep it what it is, which actually weirdly is a little bit like toilet tissue, right? But like, I just think that, I just think that people need to put

a little bit of fucking respect on toilet tissues now. There was a time where fucking, we're all fucking shouting it from the rooftops. Do not forget our fallen hero. Okay. Thank you so much. Tom?

Yeah? My G? Yeah. I have to tell you, it was about that time, my brother. Okay. We've had a great time here today, haven't we? It's been amazing. It's amazing.

It's been really amazing. Tom, can you do us the honour of taking us out of this peace? Yeah. I have so many things fluctuating in my mind right now. Sometimes at the end of this podcast I can think earnestly. I'll tell you

an ode of a man or a woman who has broken boundaries. Sometimes I'll look up to the sun or look into the sky and I'll find some words of peace and some words of reassurance. But today I'm going to look inside of all of you. I'm going to go through into your ears and into your brain. I'm going to then look out into the world through your eyes

and I'm going to pick something. Look, Martin or Shirley or Sally, there's a tree. Hold your attention on that tree and think, wowzers, that's been here for ages. Or look at some tarmac beneath you and think, wowzers, that was only just created. Look at a fire hydrant, a phone box. Take it all it all in just remember it wasn't so long ago that the only thing you could see was the four wars in which contained your spirit and your head and your brain all right and now you're out again yeah i want you to look at the clouds and think what the fucking hell's going on up there you know what is what are they all about they're all in

different shapes there's a cloud up in the sky right now and i want you to look you're the only person who sees that cloud the way that you see it no one else is going to do that that's amazing that's being a human being yo look next to someone look at across at someone you're near and just say fuck me this is amazing man what a world we live in and be happy we might not last for an hour or even two or even a minute or even 30 seconds but just for a second smile and know you are a fucking g-dog that was lovely it's really lovely i actually think there was some uh really good literal advice there yeah you know looking up at the clouds so i i do like the idea of somebody looking up at the clouds I do like the idea of somebody looking up at the clouds

and going what the fucking hell is going on out there that might be my favourite I just think let's just fucking know whether it's toilet paper or Jesus believe in something absolutely right, great, let's call back to that right guys

this has been the Wolf and Al podcast you know what to play this one out, and I know I don't want to get into a place Right, guys, this has been the Wolf and Al podcast. You know what to play this one out? And I know I don't want to get into a place where we're always playing out songs. No, because you know we're not, technically we're not allowed to play any commercial music. You know that, don't you?

Yeah, yeah, but we'll have two, three weeks off. But JT, can we end with What If God Was One Of Us? What an incredible, bearing in mind we've got two, we're not going to do this for a while now. The music, I mean. That's what we're doing. Yeah, man.

Let's go with that. Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, thanks for listening. And guys, What If... Put it in now, JT. Christ. Just a slob like one of us

Just a stranger on the bus Trying to make his way home If you have a problem, opinion, feedback or anything at all, please email us at wolfowlpod at gmail.com. That's wolfowlpod at gmail.com. We'd love to hear from you, mainly because we don't have any content ideas. Thank you.