Wolf and Owl - Matching Tattoos, Conspiracy Theories and Kevin Hart Roast

Episode Date: June 15, 2026

Will Romesh retire from comedy at 50? Will ‘Heartbreak is the hardest thing’ become a chart-topping single? And will Tom wear a toupee?On this week’s episode we also reveal our matching Wolf & Owl tattoos - yes, we got it done! Plus, the Wolf & Owl club night IS happening! Make sure to sign up to our Instagram broadcast channel for Wolf & Owl updates and keep sending your questions, dilemmas and voice notes to us at [e-mail]. A Ranga Bee Production in partnership with Platform Media. 00:00 Intro00:36 Tattoo reveal4:37 Michael Jordan6:31 The big step back10:03 Romesh the movie star12:29 The Wolf & Owl club night15:46 AI and songs18:29 Wigs and types19:10 Event organisers21:54 The roast of Kevin Hart33:35 Love for Tom34:18 - Magnifying glasses36:29 - Shout outs38:01 - Itchy toilet paper Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hello. Hello. Hello. Hello. Hello, friends. Great to be here. Good to be here, my God. Really good to be a nice t-shirt.

Thank you very much. I've not worn just a t-shirt on this before. I get kind of nervous about... Why do you get nervous? I don't know. I like layers. You look nice. I like layers.

You don't need to have a layer. I do. Arms look good boy. Four-arms look hench. Thanks. Yeah. Yeah, what do you want? Beak or jaws, feathers or fur.

Sharp teeth or feet with claws. Whatever's prefer Just kidding Every word in his songs About two grown men Dressed up as a bird And a dog Now

This arm If you look here Looks like a bit scaly Yeah That's because I've got Second Skin on Yeah Because I've got some

Ink done New ink You're looking good Paul boxer But But Um The Boxmeister

We've got to And Carl And Carl And Carl Both excellent Both incredible Yeah Let's

Should we do our reveal? Yeah. I've got one slightly more sort of Burke Chrysner than yours. Look at that, baby. I don't know if I... Look at this. We have got matching Wolf and Al tattoos.

It's got like a titty out. What? Yeah. Like a tear. Good boob at. I sort of as soon as I realized we'd had to reveal that. That's right, baby. Wolf and Al tattoos. Yeah. You can get it out of the Paul Boxel's doing them for anybody who wants them. It's a, how we do you talk?

It was a caricature of Tom as a wolf. Yeah. And it was me as an owl sort of sat on your back. What I will say that he's done an incredible job is at the first illustration he'd done the sort of like sneery look. I had to have a word of Paul because he'd done sort of a sneery look and it looked like I'd had a stroke. So he sent it to me. He said, what do you think of this? I said, it is good.

Is it possible? No, you sent it to me and I went, I love it. And you were like, don't I look like a stroke? Yeah. And then I said to Paul, can we de-stroke it a little bit? And if that's for any people who get them all sorts of. Get in touch with your brothers and arts and say, I want a wolf and our tattoo. You can get it done.

By the way, that booking system goes up quick way. Quick. He's booked up until May of next year, I believe. And Carl's similar. Yeah. Good guys, by the way. Really good guys. Really good.

I found, by the way, cool alpha dogs. So lovely as well. When I first walked in, I was like, wow, these guys are proper, proper guys. And I was a little bit, not like nervous. Yeah. But there was two of the loveliest men I've ever met. They're very kind to the two baiters that were getting inks, weren't they? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Do you have you? I felt like my tattoo arrangement up against theirs. I was like, well, these guys really know what they're doing tattoo-wise. Do you have any regrets? No. And we've permanently marked ourselves with the podcast now. Yeah. It's what we needed to do.

Yeah. Is it? Yeah. I think I'm really considering getting the Ramesh face one on me somewhere. I don't think you should do that Why? I just don't think you should do that I know

Or just like Romish's face Yeah, I have actually Yeah, I have actually Yeah, I've got my face on you Yeah Maybe I'll get John somewhere on me Just written Again, I would say

That's a bigger mistake Than getting me on you Just like a little John there J-O-N No H Yeah, okay Why? I don't know

I just slightly another with John Anyway, we're very happy about that I'm very happy It's an incredible moment It was like You know like sort of in like in sitcoms or so it's when someone like gives each other like a kidney or something

it's like a brother it's like brothers yeah we're bonded permanently yeah yeah yeah wow it actually feels like for the first of my life I've got a brother it's it's a shame in a way what you're laughing at because I know what you're gonna say

because I don't know how long I'm gonna be doing this for well you're quitting at 50 right yeah 48 yeah yeah you got two years yeah so you've got two years left of the yeah less than two years now for the 1040 out a few months ago. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So we've got two years, gets to 50,

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So think of Twislers as a little pallet cleanser for whatever's queued up, which, by the way, should be coming very soon. Like any second now. Okay, Twizzlers, time to keep the fun going. I'm walking away from it all. the Hulk. No, I'm not really walking away.

But, yeah, I'm going to, there'll be a big step back at 50. You said this at 45, I'm pretty sure if we go back. Yeah, yeah, I said, yeah, so I've been planning. I've been planning this. You've never, you stepped it up. Yeah, no. You certainly not. No, but I would say that most people wouldn't go,

God, Romish doesn't seem to be around as much. No, but what I'm saying is I'm doing the things I want to do because I'm, I'm building up to the big step back. No, you're not. Why don't you believe me? I know you're not. I just know you're not. I'm just going to do a couple of bits here and there,

but people are going to go, what happened to Ramesh? You will be like Jordan, you know, Michael Jordan finished, like any step back from the balls. Yeah, and then he tried to play baseball for a minute.

Yeah, well, there's some, there's sort of conspiracy talks about that. What do you mean? Well, some people say that he had to, because it was,

and this is a conspiracy theory. I don't believe it, or maybe I do, but I'm not going to get to, that there was a whole thing about gambling. And he was, he basically, he was the biggest name in NBA.

So he had to, he had to sort of step away from it but they made the baseball thing I think that was just a conspiracy thing I read I don't understand how that works because basically he couldn't play basketball because they were saying that there was some gambling betting right stuff I know I don't know if you think that's an explanation but it isn't you know I don't want to get too involved in getting okay but you said it's conspiracy theory so I don't believe it okay so here's what the theory is okay right and I don't believe it because I think Michael Jordan is a saint okay is that he there was some sort of

match rig and basketball sort of and he was involved and yeah he might have So you think Michael Jordan was... No, I don't think that. This is, you know, this is a court of law. I'm literally shaking like a shit and dog. Okay. I don't want to get on the wrong side of Michael Jordan. Sure.

I don't think he'll listen to this podcast, but if he is paying golf with someone who does listen to it. And they go, hey, Mike, you heard these two little pricks over the, these better males over in the UK talking about you a metricing? Yeah, I heard one of them was talking about a shit. Yeah, the other ones are dark, by the way. Do you think Michael Jordan says the word dork? that's not Michael Jordan Oh, that's his mate Yeah, Bobby.

Bobby Quinn. Bobby Quinn. Okay, fine. So Michael Jordan was rigging matches. That's what the conspiracy is. Okay. And that's why he went to baseball

and then he came back. Right, okay. But what I mean about what I was getting at is you, he couldn't step away for, he is the game. Yeah, but I'm not the game. You are the game.

Do you know what? I had a really interesting chat about you where you're away. Someone was saying that you've got like almost this godfather, father, like, feel, like, from some of the young acts, we're sort of saying how brilliant you are and how encouraging

and how helpful and nice you are. Old. No, no, yeah, but that's a nice thing. Well, look, enjoy it while you can, because you've only got two years left of it. I don't, yeah. Actually, I'll get, this is it. When's your birthday again? March. March. Right. Lacey, this is it. 50, girl.

50 in March. I'm sitting back. I'm taking it. Literally, by June. It's like, Lisa, I'm going to go down. Are you B.C. and run a color bit's about retirement. No, I might do gigs here and there, but it's a big step back. You gosh, I'm going to do, like, yeah, the big step back. I actually might call, I actually might call my tour, the big step back.

So, yeah, what, you're stepping back tour that will be an arena tour, it will be a step back. Yeah, but that'll be like, that'll be. I'll tell you what, yeah, I've seen his stepping back. He's got his new sitcom, Stepping Back, where he plays for a tired comedian, the reality show. By the way, that's a good idea, because you've got four performance in your house. Yeah, but it will be like the, you could be like the new Kardashians. be a mini tour and the last date will be on my 50th birthday.

Okay. And then I'll go, it's been fun. Oh, fuck off. I actually feel sick. It's been fun. It's been fun. Yeah, peace. Thanks for the memories. And then what? Like, Green Day time of your life plays. Yeah. Another than a boy, the boy, look in the ball.

Yeah. And then I'll come back out like this. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like literally people just sobbing like that. you know who you might end up like Ozzy Osbourne? What does that mean? Well he thought he was going to sit That's what his plan was

Yeah And obviously then everyone was like The kids were getting older They wanted to move into So they started making the Osbournes Right? And a bit like, We're not going to make anything like that

Mate at some, right So you're telling me now Theo, very cool guy He'd be brilliant in a reality show Alex has got some He's got some vibes Do I mean? He'd be great TV, right?

And then you got Charlie Who's Farsi becoming a West End superstar right? You've got three kids in the game, right? Lisa, we already know, has been in one of your other shows. She was great on camera. He said, they all come together and go, Ron, what if we do like a reality

show? Hulk Hogan, if you watch a Hulk Hogan, that's why happened to Hulk Hogan? Hogan knows, that's how that came about. Okay. I'm stepping out. And it could start with you, like, just as I thought I was at, they'd like me back in. It's like, that could be the vibe.

You know what? You and John's over the way chuckling, right? You two, going to be so fucking sorry when it happens. No, what? And then I'm going to block both your numbers. Oh shit. So you're not going to have any friends either? You're never going to... By the way, you two are not my only friends? No, no, you've got other friends.

Of course you have. But what? You're just going to literally walk away. By the way, I just don't see it happening. If it happens, I will say, do you know what? Mark me wrong. I don't see it. I might still do this podcast. We do this podcast and you're still going to do a massive tour.

And I'll still do my other podcast. Yeah, and your studio have a podcast, which I'd say is an amazing podcast. I probably still do the radio show. You do the radio show. Probably, probably I'd imagine still do the odd series of weakest link. Yeah, I think that's. Rob and Ron would be ashamed to see let that go because I enjoy spending time with Rob. And then, of course, all my other endeavours.

By the way, me and you at the moment, I've literally spent while you're away. I've spent some time getting something. I know, I know, I know. But that's going to happen before I'm 50, isn't it? Well, hopefully, yeah, but it's a runner. It's not saying I'm going on. I do, I've solemnly believed that there's a movie part from Romish Wank and Nathan that literally blows the world away. I see it in the stars.

And I'm telling you that now. You will get a role in the next two years, which puts your name on the map as a bona fide Hollywood star. And I'm saying it. No, I'm saying it. No, that is, I'm not, that isn't bullshit or blowing smoke. I'm telling you now. And if that doesn't happen, I will, I will walk away yourself. You'll walk away.

Sorry, okay, can we clip this up? If I don't get off. I won't walk away because I'm not financially stable. If I don't become a... I can't put my wife and daughter in that situation. I couldn't financially... Look, I do believe that will happen. Well, it's very sweet of you to say.

I think that is the bit... It was already happening for you. But anyway, enjoy it while you can because in less than two years... Viewers, this is Tom Davis, okay, the wolf. Do you believe in two years, Romash will be hanging up his spurs? Or do you think like I do? this cowboy's got a couple of more rodeos left in his gut. No, I'm not going to completely, it's a step back.

It's not a step away. It's like a, you know, like a rolling contraction. I don't see it. Yeah. Okay. So are you telling me now? I mean, the other thing is the industry might decide that for me. And then suddenly I, you know.

Yeah, I think, you know what I think it is? I think it's psychologically more that for you. You're making your piece. It's like when you think someone's going to dump you. And I don't even know I form that into her. Knowing that the shit's, you know, that's what you're, I don't think the industry does think that, but I think that's what you're doing.

You're going to farm of it, because I said it was going to step away after two years anyway, didn't I, go? But that's what you're making peace with it. But don't make peace of it. You're a juggernaut. Anyway, you heard it here first. If I am not a major Hollywood star within the next two years,

Tom Davis will walk away from the industry. Financially, I can't do that. I can't afford to, I'm not in a place where I can go, I'm just going to fucking take a step back. Well, that's not, listen, it's not our fault that you've fucking indebted yourself up to the eyeballs because you bought a house on the most affluent street in the country. You bought that fucking castle. I'm not a notoriously bad with me.

And I wonder you don't want to do traitors. You're already fucking living one. It's been every day where I'm not going to be voted out of it. Mate, fucking, that is, that is good shit. Some of us are just warming up into this game. You should invite 20 of your mates around and just do it at your house. What are you going to do for your 50th birthday, by the way? Nothing.

What? We can have a joint one. Oh, by the way, the club night has got, well, you've been away, the club night has got a lot of heat. Okay, I want to talk about the club night. Because it has to have, there's, like, Martin Too Smooth, very much getting involved. He's into it. Rob Percy's into it. Rob Percy, by the way.

That guy is like a hound. We also had messages from various... Some brands have got in touch and said they're willing to support it. So, we are doing it. But the question is when? Autumn. Autumn. Yeah.

Okay. We're going to do it in the autumn. It's going to be small initially. I think we just do a dry run of it. Not dry run. It might be dry with the amount of fucking WKD in that venue. Or other similar brands. Well, whatever.

You know what I mean? I'll give an example. Yeah, I know, yeah. So it's going to be what are we going to call it? I think it's a war for now club night. Yeah, but we need to get across the idea that. Yeah. So what are we saying?

Is it over 30s? yeah over 30s even over 30s yeah over 30s we do it over 30s so how we're gonna lay this out I think first of all it's daytime has to be daytime so I think three till 10 yeah four till 10

something like that yeah finishes at 10 though finishes at 10 and then all of the sort of stuff you get at the old you know that you'd get the like blue hawker god but got guys at the guy and the guy's toilet go with the perfumes and aftershade lollipops yeah lollipops all that all the drinks that you'd expect

Yeah. Everyone's got to dress up as well. Yeah, everyone's got to dress shoes from that era. No trainers. Yeah, no trainers. Yeah, no sports tops. Shirt. Sheets.

Jeans. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Any other bands or musicians who want to come along? Yeah. PA from... Live PA.

PA from Mbeat. Wait, this is going to be, I think this is good. Ace of bass. Yeah. And DJing wise, what? We're going to have Percy. We're going to have. It's too smooth.

Yeah. I mean, Tucemovie will have to step out of his normal comfort zone, but he'll play anything for anyone. Yeah, Percy, by the way, this is May for Rob Percy. Oh, mate. Rob Percy, he will absolutely eat this. Both of them will. Martin and Rob are going to absolutely.

And what me and you are just like hosts with the most. We just walk around, schmoozy. Actually, you could be the freshen up guy in the men's toilets. I'd do that. I always used to look at those guys and think, well, that's it. What I would say from my experience of organizing these sort of nights, what I don't want you to do is just wander around like a fucking Donnie. You're going to get mock.

It's not going to be a fun night for you or for anyone else around you. So just... You know what you should. You should dress like. I watched American gangster with Denzo Washington again. Great film. And that moment when he comes out in a fur coat, we should get you a fur coat. What's that got to do with the theme of the night?

Because he goes to a party and he's got a fur coat. Yeah, I know, but he's not in the blue awkward, is he? Do you really like it? What are you going to wear, by the way? I don't know. We've got to have some garage there. It's all right. Yeah.

A garage, bit of house. Then we got power ballads. Yeah. Like the old days. Yeah, sing along. You could, you. Yeah, I'll do a single. Why don't you lead to sing along?

All day long. This is going to be great. The two things that have really blown up for us where you've been away. That and, of course, that single. A lot of cries at crying out for us to do a football World Cup. Well, the, the slight issue with that is. Vern's taken some shit of things that we did and used AI to turn into a thing, right? Yeah. We can't use AI.

No, we can't use AI, but I'm saying actually... Actually do a song? Yeah, actually do a song. By the way, I was like, that AI is just a base of going, oh, actually, there's a tune here. Yeah, yeah. And actually there's some. The AI generated it.

We weren't singing to a tune. No, no, but the words were as. I think you might be underestimating what the AI actually did in terms of an answer. No, no, can I say the words were as? And that's the thing that we struck a lot of people. Yeah, okay, his body turned to ash. Yeah. By the way, I think that's the darkest bit.

The funniest line is the, the game boy to play with his dog that is the line of them yeah actually my favorite line is I never tried it Bill that's gonna

wow who's Bill what's he about yeah yeah yeah but I think yeah there's a song there so I think we could actually do our own song at the night

have you heard that have you seen this thing where people are turning text messages into songs yeah I think they've seen that have we talked about this the pick up

do you know a pickup do you know a pick up song no no this girl called Amber yeah she said I put on my ex's text into a tune and it's like

I don't want to sing it but anyway it's so catchy and it sounds like a tune by notes the singer and so then he recorded it and has put it out

with that like notes and amber have now got it's like pick the fuck up now I can't do I can't sing it but anyway it's amazing song so but this is what we can do

that I always done a version of that and we just then take that song and we record it with us yeah okay the problem is is that notes could sit that song was done in the style of notes and he was able to sing it

like that. Can you sing it like the AI generated? Okay. The AI Um, heart break is the hardest thing. It's a hardest thing, old friend. Yeah. Yeah. It's more American, isn't it?

Heart break is the hardest thing. Okay, you're getting a bit closer. It's the hardest thing. Oh friend. Heart break is the hardest thing. It'll kill you in the end. I mean, I'll get some lessons. Yeah, okay.

I think we're still quite far away. I think the club night's probably easier. But anyway, the club night's happening. What I don't want to do is perform that song at the club night. We can't perform that. That's kind of what you were suggested. No, no, I think we write another song. No, it's another song.

Okay, fine. And we can do one in the autumn in London. Yeah, and then we do one. Up north, yeah. Okay. Later in the year. Yeah, all right, fine. Oh, mate, this is so cool.

It's exciting, isn't that? Yeah. We'll go out together and get like 501s, Wyself shirts. Yeah, we can buy that. You don't have to buy that ticket. You know how to get. Patrick Cox's.

But you're one of these. I'm trying to think, I used to be like a I might actually get a wig for it. Why sell shirt jeans? Have you seen those really, those wig things that proper toupees? A guy contacted me about two pays

and he's like, let if you want to come in and try one of these, I might get a toupee for it. Have you seen the guys, like the hair systems where they glue them on and they wear them for like weeks at a time? Yeah, yeah.

I might get one of those for this. Tom, Tom, please, like for the weeks around it, get a hair system. I'll go hair system for this. I would fucking love to see you. It depends if I'm working, but yeah.

For the night I'll get a hair system. to stuff. Yeah, yeah. I mean, like, knowing you, you might pull out of the night because something's come in. No, no, no, no. This is, I'm so looking forward to this. I can't tell you. I might have... It's going to take a bit of organisation though, isn't it? Yeah, I mean, but yeah, that's what, lucky enough, we're surrounded by a really, really good team of organisers. You know he'll be great for organising, Ben Green. He'll love a club night. He'll love a club night. Yeah, he will love it, but I don't think he should be organised. Who did? John, Jean. Well, I just think when we say these things,

Flo and the team off the curb starts to get nervous. John's looking nervous. Because what they know is that we spout off a load of shit on the podcast. And then we say, we're really doing forward to it. We're going to put it on.

By the way, I think we need this. We need this. What are you, okay, tell me what are you, what, we've arranged to do this. Well,

you know who it would be like? Avon and string a bell. Okay, but tell me what you're going to do when this podcast finishes to make this happen. What, today? I'll probably sit with John and go, right, what were you looking at venue-wise?

What, you'd give me one job to do this and I'll fucking, I'll get on it. Okay, sort of ticketing. Okay, cool. Would, like, draw the tickets? Draw the tickets. What, make a cool looking ticket? No. What have you been ticketing?

There's not going to be physical tickets. Oh, okay. Well, there would have been back in the day, right? Yeah. You'd have got a physical ticket. Oh, yeah, but we can't be asked to fuck around with that, can we? Getting a physical ticket. Okay, so you just have it on your phone?

Yeah, although physical, actually, it's not a very, I think we're going to go back to the nighties. Hold on, did you have physical tickets to nightclubs? Didn't you just pay on your way in? No, you paid on your way in. But we can't do that. Yeah. Oh, you know, we could have wolf and hour bucks.

What does they get you? Like drinks and stuff. You buy your wolf and hourb... It's like, you know, if you go to Lapland, UK and you buy the... Yeah, yeah, I get it, I get it. Yeah. You get Wolf and Albux. Yeah.

I don't know, like a wolf buck is worth five pounds, and our buck is worth ten. It's like, yeah, wow, look at this. Fucking, how my wolf and our bucks. And some people will keep them, make them into chains, pendants. Yeah, okay. I don't know about the bucks. I think you're adding a lot of needless logistics and then cut to you speaking to John going,

where the fuck of the bucks? When it's fucking wolf and our bucks, mate. I've had the idea you make it happen. What are you doing, John? What are you doing, well? I suppose to see the fucking buck prototype today. This is exciting. I'm very excited about it.

Lisa coming? I mean, we've thought about it now. Yeah, I'm going to invite, I'm close with Lisa. Theo, is Theo coming? The Thieman, the Thesaurus. It's probably over 30s, isn't it? Oh, yeah, straight, yeah. You can't break the rule.

He's going to struggle. Lisa's only 23, of course. I think if we do it year after next, Lisa might be out of come. But, okay, we'll do it. This is exciting. Spotify, it's Jay Shetty. Are you one of those media strategy people? Scrolling through spreadsheets, searching for an audience

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Visit Wayfair.ca. Wayfair, every style, every home. Did you watch the Kevin Hart Roast? Yes. Yeah. Okay, first of all, what's your opinion on Roast comedy? I don't think, when we tried it on here and I was awful at it. I don't think it's something I'd be particular.

particularly good at. Do I enjoy it? Yeah, I enjoy someone's really good at it. I think if someone's exceptional, I think Nicky Glazier, I loved her on the Tom Brady one.

I think if you're really, really good at it, I think, yeah, it's a good thing to see. Tom Brady was actually good on the Kevin Harlow's. He was, yeah. I think he was one of the people. No, but I think,

I thought, um, Cheryl, Cheryl Underwood. Cheryl Underwood, yeah. It was outstanding. I thought she was really. Probably player of the match. By a long way, yes. and the rock did what the rock would do at a race.

Can we talk about one particular aspect of that with regards to the rock? Now, obviously, everybody got excited. Late on in the evening, the rock comes on. I'd say after Cheryl would underwood, it needed something. Yeah. So the rock comes on, looking immaculate. Yeah. Everyone's buzzing their tits off.

Yeah. His entrance, by the way. Can I just say, I will say this, right? When you're doing it, because as you're aware, I sometimes go so big when I'm about to start a tour show that I think I can't actually follow it that the act itself is this the entrance is so big and grand yeah it's kind of fucking mad

you're always very funny if I introduce you to stage you always come off and give me a look to say why the fuck have you done that why are you literally like your introed a boxer there's not a fight happening some jokes so when I watched the rock I was like okay now what was his entrance he did can you snap oh yeah yeah that's right so he comes out

he looks unbelievable that's incredible could I say but I wear the weight loss on him amazing. Yeah, yeah, really good. Because he was looking like a fat fuck with all, wasn't he? No, but it's good for him to lose some fucking timber, you fucking flabby so anyway, so he comes out, it looks great. Starts doing the jokes, I thought this stuff was great.

You know, delivered it beautifully. He's a funny, the rock is funny. He's charismatic is what he is. The bit that I thought was weird. Yeah. It's really interesting bit because, okay, so earlier in the night, I think probably one of the most exciting moments of the evening is when Kat Williams comes out. That was incredible.

who actually hates Kevin Hart, right? Yeah. You don't believe that? I think if you really hated someone. But I don't think he likes him. And he does think he's an industry plant and he does think he's a sellout. Yeah, I agree then.

But I will say that, yeah, go on. So he comes out and he says something about Kevin Hart engaging in cunery, basically, right? Which is kind of like just undermining your culture and race for the benefit of the white audience, right? Yes, sort of. that's kind of a rough explanation. So anyway, the rock says to Kevin Hart,

they're about to have a drink. And the rock says to Kevin Hart, come and sit on my knee, right? And the audience start getting excited. And Kevin Hart is thinking about it. And Shane Gillis, I don't even remember this, he says, don't do it because then Cat Williams will be right. Oh, shit.

I heard him say, I think he's caught. So basically what he's saying is, do not make a mug of yourself here by sitting on the rock's knee and because it's in back so then you got this awkward thing where the rock I mean if you watch your back this is my

recollection of it is the rock thinks that this is going to be a moment Kevin Hart is now in a quandary because basically it's a bit of a weird move and then so then he sort of refused because I'm fucking doing it and it's a bit of an awkward moment right the whole suck your titty thing but that's so that's the other thing

the rock is saying to him suckle at my suckle on my teeth or whatever. Yeah, yeah. What the fuck was that? But that's, you know what this is, right? I believe in it. I think he's got, and you see this happen, right?

You see when, like, I need to be very careful. I don't ever want to be horrible. About the rock? No, not about the rock, but because there's someone else. So I did a charity night recently. Great lineup, brilliant lineup. Some of our really good friends on the lineup. Yeah.

And there was a person on there who wasn't a comedian. Nice guy, good guy. Yeah. goes up to do a bit for the charity. So he's talking about the charity. And he goes into a bit when he's doing a bit of spiel and he's doing a bit. And he gets a couple of laughs, right?

And he's a funny, charismatic person. He gets a couple of laughs. And we're all up there and we're told 10 minutes no longer. All of a sudden, this guy's doing 15 minutes, right? And it's going on. Because he's got those laughs. And all of a sudden. Yeah.

And you see it happen. Like that happens with comedians as well. Yeah, it does. Yeah, it does. But most of us go, I'm here for 10 minutes. Even if I'm crushing it or whatever, you go, I'm here for 10. and I'll go. And he,

I could see, you can see someone going, this is fucking great. Because even when they, he comes off, he's like, you know, I could do stand up.

And you're like, you know, a charity care, by its very nature, great, but they're always very lovely and giving, do I mean?

It's a very different thing. You know, and I think that's what happened to the rock. But also I think, like everyone now, as you say, he's after the moment.

Yeah. And so all that stuff. I was able to, I thought Kevin Hart was incredible when he, came back. His race at the end.

His race at the end. I think the talking point of that Hinchcliff's joke. So Hinchcliff's joke was George Floyd would be looking up at you and not able to breathe. There's something like that, wasn't it? He'd be laughing so much that he'd be looking up at you and unable to breathe.

I just didn't think, like I look at it and think, why? Like, why have that joke? Like, that is not even a joke. Well, so it's, it's, look, he is a very controversial figure. He says some, stuff, outlandish stuff. I will say that I think I've seen him on Roast and think he's brilliant. I think he's done Roast where he's been

very good. He's a roast comic. Yeah, like, you know, he doesn't, he's good at that. But I'm like, why, that, that roast wasn't about. So, so that roast and it's the joke of itself is like, when you're looking across the Diaz, is it called? The Dias?

Oh, the, uh, the, uh, the, the Deas. So you're looking across that, why, like, all the people there is the point. That's meant to be the aim of what you're doing. The aim is, supposed to be Kevin Hart, right? Why do you need to make a joke about a guy who's been killed in police custody? That's the thing where I'm sitting there.

It feels pointless as to like, so your joke about Kevin isn't that strong. You haven't got enough stuff, so you're having to them drag in something else to pull. Well, I think he's looking for a shock. If you mentioned George Floyd, it is going to be shocking. And so what people are reacting to is the very mention of George Floyd. and then he's looking up, some people have said, like,

either it means he's looking up because there's a police officer stood over him, or he's in hell, right? I think, I think it's, he's in hell

because he's saying George Floyd would be looking up, so he's suggesting that's where he is now. But the thing is, right, that's not, it's not a joke. No.

Like, I'm pretty unoffendable, as I think you are as well. I think with comedy, I think, like, yeah, it's a roast, right?

And you can go nearly anywhere. But that, but that is not a joke. And it, brings into question the thing of like, you know, people talking about white writers being on that show and making jokes about, you know, I think Shane Gillis, there was some attention brought to his, what did he say? We'd have to lynch him from a bonsai tree, right? Yeah. So there's all this stuff that's like, it's a bit, you know, there's been a bit of upro about it.

And I understand, I sort of understand both sides of the argument. do you know what I mean it's like all bets are off but the thing is is if you're coming into that I think it's one thing if you're coming into that not having regularly made those jokes before and then you decide to push the pushing like be a bit edgy or I think sometimes the problem is where it's coming from right so if you if you I'm not saying you have a word

but if you made a racist joke a roast right yeah people would go I know Tom doesn't mean that because I've never heard Can I just say my big thing with all this above anything else is that through the whole thing is that when you go back and watch the Tom Brady one and Charlie Sheen roast or Justin Beaver's roast or numerous other roasts and if you actually break those down, they're about a person's character. So I think it's the same thing I've said for the last 15 years about your eye. I think if I'm ever at a point where if someone says it starts me in a street and makes a joke of it, I'm like, I'd be embarrassed if that's the thing that I'd be going at. Right. So I found that when they're making jokes about Kevin Hart, they're not actually about his character and not about Kevin Hart.

They're about race and about life. They're the two things. They're the two easiest things. So it's not any cunning and it's not any cleverness to write those two things because they're actually not going at Kevin. The only person he actually did was Tom Brady, where I'm going out of to Vegas to deal with my affairs. Yeah.

It's the only person really who's gone and think Shera Underwood did. Show Underwood, by the way, out of everyone at that, is almost like the race to Cheryl Underwood or Chelsea Handler. I think both those two have taken more of a kicking on a personal level than Kevin did. Yeah. I don't think anyone. So then you go into a place and going, is this whole thing. And cats, obviously when cats come on, cats had a go.

But actually, for a lot of it, they're not really going in at Kevin for that. No. So then are you looking at a place where it's like, yeah, we'll have a roast, but you're not going to, you're not allowed to mention this, this, this. Which very much for the nature of what a roast is, is completely, you lose any sort of weight of what it actually means. So you're drawn into a place where you're like any of this is, just it could that could just be about any person from from that world like do it mean it could be about any short person or any bad person it doesn't need to be

about Kevin Hart so I think when I when I talk about Nikki Glazer or whose people are really really good at it you know I think like Jeffrey Jeff Ross from wherever you think of you know he takes a kick on on those things yeah yeah but it's about Jeff Ross about his appearance about Jeff Ross is you know whatever is his sex life is he's whatever but it's about Jeff Ross and that's where I sat there and watched. She was like, you know, I love Kevin. I like, I like, I like, nothing seems to be about you.

It's about. Well, I mean, the stuff they said about the women was horrible, like Chelsea Handlers. I thought she was incredible. I think she handled it with. Well, she was obviously pissed off about it and then kick back it against it. And I thought Shane Gillis, when Shane Gillis wasn't, I think, I mean, he's one of my favorite comedies. I love Shane Gillis.

I think he's very funny. But I was like, he also, you know, gave it to, Chelsea, Chelsea gave it to him. I think that's also carried on after. What's insane is everyone's kind of had that. Oh, yeah, well, we're at. And the aftermath of it has almost been like a boxing or a football match where people have walked away and there's clearly a bone of contention about all of it. Yeah.

I watched it thinking, this is not the big dummy D. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, look, I mean, you came down to the last two, didn't you for the last spot on it? Could you imagine? The one thing I know. You know who was brilliant on it was the guy who's come up with Kevin. Oh, my, the writer. Who turned around at the end and say, they promised us to land and a mule.

Oh yeah. My God, we got that am you. I thought that was one of the best. That's what I mean. That's a joke here. That was really good. One of the things I don't understand about that is why the fuck, and I know they're mates of Kevin Hartz or whatever, why the fuck you'd want to sit on that day if you're not part of the roast? No. Oh, you know who's also brilliant? Who? Who's the woman who read out? It's like it was his dead nan. Oh. Was it Regina Hall? Oh, mate, she was fucking. That's the sort of stuff. If I was going to do it, I like, this is surreal and it's a bit fucking.

mad. Yeah. It's very funny. Yeah. I do want to address this before we go to Tom's big closer. But obviously Tom and I have been talking about, you and I have been talking about kissing each other. Yeah, it's been a run of this. And it turns out that there are a lot of men who want to smash or be smashed by you.

Yeah. And you, I do think you didn't, you didn't think it would be quite as big as it is. And then I started to play. Well, you played me some voice notes. And there were a lot. Yeah. So, yeah, it turns out you've got a big following. You know what?

I appreciate each and everyone. You very much. Thank you for being a part of the journey. Maybe not so many graphic pictures. The graphic pictures I don't need, but you know what? Your support and love is all good here, baby. Right, Tom, can you take us out this, please? Yeah.

Huh, a magnifying glass, friend. What's it to do? Magnify things, Tom. Yeah, I guess so. But do we need a magnifying glass for that? How do we look inside ourselves without a magnifying glass? How do we look at the small feelings that become big feelings or the big feelings that should become small feelings?

I guess what I'm saying is how do we look deep down? How do we examine ourselves? The moods we're in, the moves we make. How do we think about those things? See, exteriorly, it's always good. You can look. I feel upset because it's raining or I feel happy because it's sunny. But the weather isn't really that deep.

The truth is, you are. What I want you to do today is I want you to look inside yourself and say, how do I really feel today? Am I happy? Could I be happier? Am I sad? Could I be sad? Could I be happy? Am I sad?

Why? Why am I feeling sad? Sit with the feelings for a little bit. Sit with them and think. Why do I feel this way? See, it's always easy to blame other things, whether people, other stuff. examining the real reason, get into the root of it. That can be the most beneficial thing of all.

So imagine you've got a little magnifying glass. And imagine that you look in a mirror and very much it's like an x-ray that you can look inside yourself. And when you're looking inside yourself, you won't just see bones and organs and blood and stuff. You might just catch a glimpse of what's really going on deep down. and when you see that thing, go, huh, wow, that's a feeling.

I'm alive. Sit with it, enjoy it, and remember, you're the best. Am I happy? Could I be happy? Oh my God. Thank you so much. They're getting hard of those. Do you know, but actually, I need to do a shout out.

There was a guy who came to the Chatham show. He loved a young man, and afterwards he waited, and I had a long chat of him and I won't name him because I don't think it's fair and he'd be chatted about it. But he gave me a book and in the book it was loads of my stupid He's not until...

He put it together? He's a beautiful book and he put it together He's an incredible young man He's been through a lot And I found a book very touching I also went through the book with Gratz and was like, oh my God I've said a load of fucking stupid moronic things

But it meant a lot It was a really, really sweet gift And I cherish that And I thank you so much giving that to Tom and I really enjoyed my gift as well. Oh no he he loves you. He actually, he's got a picture of you as well. Can I say he, yeah.

Also, by the way, someone showed me a picture of you with them. You look so fit. It was like it was you in peak running one. So I look worse now? No, actually, really think you're actually filling out quite a nice and muscular. You're doing some weights, right? Yeah. Yeah. You're good. You're nice.

You got some nice about it, I think. Okay, this is... Also shout out of original source. Oh my God. Original Source. What's happened with Original Source? Original Source sent me a load of, have they sent us?

Oh, they have been in touch. Yeah, apparently going to send it to me. Yeah. So anyway, Original Source, thank you. Thank you. We mentioned your shower gels and they've sent a care package to each of us. Cool. Thank you very much.

So thank you so much for that. Our Bulls and Goochers, thank you. Actually, I don't want to make this go on even longer. This is the last bit. Can I just say there should be, there's a sort of toilet paper that you have. have that makes your butthole so itchy and it literally goes all the way to your gooch into your ball bag with itchiness it's like it's had itching powder i want to find out what toilet

paper it is but i used it the other day in a pub after a dump and it absolutely destroyed me i mean who's taking a shit at a pub ladies a gentleman friends if you take a shit at a pub and it's not an emergency it's just a normal night out you deserve to have a fucking allergic reaction to a toilet tissue. Like a subscribe. Email into the Wolfoutepot at GMR.com. Peace! Yo!

Love it.