Wolf and Owl - S2 Ep 15: Gym Jocks & Over-indulging

Episode Date: October 12, 2022

We’re talking… becoming ‘Locker Room Joes’, fitness app Top Trumps, deteriorating take-aways, homemade curries, over-indulging on free food, the false economy of a free bar limit and Tom’s charity push-up challenge. Then after a rather controversial follow-up email, we answer questions on excessive eating and drinking on holiday, the right time and place to approach a celebrity and how best to help a lonely family member. For questions or comments please email us at [e-mail] - we’d love to hear from you. Instagram - @wolfowlpod YouTube - www.youtube.com/WolfandOwlPodcast Merch - https://wolfandowlpod.com/ A Shiny Ranga Production For sales and sponsorship enquiries: [e-mail] Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Both of them are known to pull up at your shows Have the crowd witnessing a murder like they rolled in with a gang of crows Fuck the censorship, let them see the whole thing They stay dressed to kill, never sheep's clothing, dark enough to turn the sun to the moon You'll see nothing, all you hear is a huff, a puff and a... Expect killings, red spilling and flesh ripping, impressive in it, the death bringing, it's head spinning Just kidding, every word in this song's about two grown men dressed up as a bird and a dog Good morning, my people, and welcome Good afternoon, my people good evening good night or whenever you happen

to be listening to happy lunchtime welcome to the wolf and the owl uh how's it going how's it going how's it going hope you well hope you well we're well uh tom and i just before we like to have a little chat before we press record just to see get the old conversational juices flowing both had a workout feeling pretty good about it what did you do what did you do me i did chest and back today your chest a little push and a little pull feel good for that vibe feel good i had a pu i had a push day today bro all push all push yeah are we jim jocks now? I think we might be, yeah.

We're locker room Joes, yeah? Yeah. We're like, you know, I know I'm not a locker room Joe until I walk around the change rooms naked. Currently, I don't even set foot in the change rooms. I turn up, do my workout, and leave immediately. Yeah, but that's a kind of maverick look. That's a maverick look. That's still a pretty, yeah. you're still not doing bad with that the world i also think i've i've just transitioned to full gym wanker because uh i've bought lifting straps

In order to remind you I've known you and loved you, I never, ever thought... Did you buy them from a shop or did you buy them online? I bought them online. So basically, like, a couple of weeks ago, I was... Oh, I love you I was lifting so much fucking weight boy I was lifting so much weight yeah

I needed to get the strap now a couple of weeks ago I was at the gym and this guy I think I've talked about him before but this geezer that I used to go to school with who's absolutely hench was there and he goes do you want to jump in with me become gym and this guy I think I've talked about him before but this geezer that I used to go to school with who's absolutely hench

was there and he goes do you want to jump in with me I'm friends with this guy now well you know we used to hang out quite a lot at school

he's a genuine school mate so anyway we I jumped in with him he's absolutely ripped and he had these lifting straps it's like this glove

with like a it's like a wrap thing I don't wear lifting straps I'm rough okay fine fine fine i've written on that horse before so you know you wrap your you wrap it and then you lock it in or whatever so so he he was showing me how to use it and i was like oh this is much easier because my little hands get so tired gripping onto the bar and sometimes my back's still ready to do more but my hands are so weak so please tell me you said that yeah my back's ready to do more my back's my back doesn't feel like it's just my wrists bro

yeah i put a funny voice on as if that isn't what i said but it is what i said so then he goes well you should get this lifting when you leave me on his shoulder when you're saying like that yeah it's like my back can do more, but my hands just give way, you know? Yeah. That's why I was only able to do 10% of what you did, because of my grip strength. So then, like, so you go to get these lifting straps. So I ordered them off Amazon. And what they do is they cause me to take an extra 10 minutes every time I do an exercise,

because I can't fucking figure them out at all. Do you know what I mean? They're a complicated piece of kit they are they look they look really simple but the setup is really complicated and then i went with my brother and my brother was just like what sorry my brother's like what level do you think you're lifting at like i get this for an olympian right so somebody that's got to push that extra 10 you're picking weights up off the top shelf you know you're you're at the beginning 15 yeah and then you're getting the straps out just walking up so we're going you'll pass those uh 15 over yeah yeah and then they just chuck them over whoa whoa whoa whoa cowboy I've got to strap them up

hold on a sec but they are like the avenue into that when you've got those you are a full qualified gym you're a jock now you are a jock well I am a jock except for

how I actually look you know what I mean did you ever watch Pain and Game yeah well I watched the first half of it and then I tapped out, but. Oh,

I love that movie. Um, actually the second half is incredible. We should go back to it. But there's, you know, the guy that they're trying to con in it. Yeah.

That's how I can imagine you are when you first joined the team. Oh, what's that, Tom? What's that? What's your comedic theme? Uh,

naming a film and the character that's the biggest c*** would be me. No. Oh, that's, that's new. **** would be me. No. That's new. No, I'm just saying.

You know, insert name of film. Yeah. You know, insert name of fucking muggy character. Yeah. That's you, that is. I'm just saying. No, but... You know the biggest fucking embarrassing fucking neat prick in that yeah

much as I love you that reminds me of you oh does it does it is this another chapter in our abusive relationship no but why can't you ever

fucking name me as a hero no but he becomes a hero in the end he's very cool I've not seen the end yeah watch the end actually don't watch it just take my word for it because I actually can't really in the end he's very close in the end yeah watch the end actually don't watch it just just take my word for it because i actually can't really remember the end and actually

what i'm saying though is you are now on a thing of you've become that cat you've become a guy right who's gone from not knowing anything to actually having gym straps that's a big move bro yeah but i still don't know anything really do you mean well? Well, what's your progression of weights you've lifted? Where have you gone from? And what are you at now? That's how you know. I have made progression. You can see that.

You look sick. You look in amazing shape. I don't. So I got recommended these scales. I don't know how these scales do it, right? Scales are the worst thing, by the way. Yeah, sure. But these scales are like, you go on them barefoot and they've got some like weird

senses on them yeah and they can analyze your body fat percentage your medical yeah is it your your metabolic age or something i mean yeah yeah i'm well aware of that shit yeah yeah i know you're fully aware of that check him out on tour uh but i on tour sorry and then you said what you do for the app so it goes onto your phone yeah yeah it goes onto the app and it goes into your phone yeah so first of all my body fat percentage yeah what do you think my body fat percentage is let's just looking at me there i know you know no no no but looking at you at the moment and looking like when i've seen pictures i I'd say it's got to be quite low now. 29.6%. That's pretty good though, right? No, that's a third though, isn't it?

That can't be all right, can it? A third of your body is fat. Isn't that what bears do before they go to sleep for the winter? Mate, if I put mine in, I guarantee it's worse. What's the app called on that? Let me have a look. By the way, we're not by these guys we're just oh man what's it called it's so fucking annoying

let me just see where it's fitness on my fucking phone I've got a new handset do you know what it means yeah it means you're using terms from 1985 handset right here we go. So what am I looking for? Body fat. Yeah. How much is this? So you're better than me. I'm 39. I'm 30.9 body fat.

Yeah, but this is us in the best shape of our... Well, it's not the best shape of my life. What's your metabolic age at the moment? 44. I'm 49, bro. Why is that? We're working out all the time. What the fuck's going on?

So your metabolic age is how old you've assumed I am for the last six months. What's your visceral fat? Visceral fat? Hold on. I'm actually quite nervous about reading all this out because my visceral fat is 7.7. Mate, mine's 15. What's your... I don't understand.

This feels like the saddest game of Top Trumps. Yeah. What's your body water? Body water is 49.9%. Yeah, you're beating me on that. I'm 48.3. What is your protein? Protein is 16.4%.

Oh, 15.7. Pretty close there, boy. Skeletal muscle? Skeletal muscle is 41%. 44.6. You fucking rat. Muscle mass? Muscle mass is 55.8.

I've got a different one. I've got 13 stone, 13.58 stone. How does this tell this from your bare feet? That's what I don't understand. Mate, fuck knows. Like, if I'm honest with you, like, so talking about this vibe,

right, you know what I'm going to do in November? Have you seen in November the, for cancer research? Hold on, before you get into this yeah we need to issue an apology to the listeners go on hit me hit me why well because people get annoyed with us talking about this don't they so we need to can we just say sorry no i'm sorry yeah i apologize if this isn't your vibe but this is what we're into at the moment and we're both we've both had quite

serious obsession if it makes you feel any better there's probably another two weeks of this. And then we're back off the wagon talking about our favorite takeaways. This episode is brought to you by Tresemme. Want silky smooth hair that's still full of natural movement? The Tresemme Keratin Smooth Weightless Collection is your simple solution. This new collection features a wide range of products from nourishing shampoo and conditioner to lightweight heat protectants and a silky smooth serum for a sleek finish. Wave goodbye to frizz and say hello to three days of smooth hair with the Tresemme

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Prices exclude delivery. Order up for Damien. Hey, how did your doctor's appointment go, by the way? Did you ask about Rebelsis? Actually, I'm seeing my doctor later today. Did you say Rebelsis? My dad's been talking about Rebelsis. Rebelsis? Really?

Yeah, he says it's a pill that... Well, I'll definitely be asking my doctor if Rebelsis is right for me. Rebelsis. Ask your doctor or visit Rebelsis.ca. Order up for Rebelsis. Speaking of which, by the way, okay. I got a takeaway. I got a takeaway the other night. Yeah. Mate, I know that this is like, I'm telling you, man,

chilli, salt and pepper tofu. I know people hate tofu, but if they do it well. I like tofu, but tofu doesn't like me. Oh, right. Yeah. I actually enjoy the taste of tofu. I think tofu could be banging if you get the right vibe to it. Yeah, yeah.

But if you get the wrong vibe, it's unacceptable. I tried to make a tofu scramble. i literally would have more enjoyed vomiting into the pan and heating that up we've changed up now we've gone to a new uh so we've been using the same curry house for the last three years and we've changed to change to a nepalese vibe you know when your favorite place slowly deteriorates yeah and everything just good, everything tastes the same. Yeah. There's some Indian, like, because when I used to go on tour with Sean Walsh, we used to go to Curry House after every show and then I carried on that tradition when I went

on to my first tour. And the variance in quality of Indian restaurants that we went to was staggering man I mean like people think curry house is a curry house yeah it just isn't the case it's not like mate Asif who drives me like he's a dear friend of mine family friend he literally Asif right is number one he blew my mind the other day he brought uh have you had like a pakora curry well you're a vegetarian but he brought chicken pakora curry around the other day never never tried that

I didn't even know that was a thing mate I'm going to tell you now chicken pakora in like the sauce was absolutely his mum made it for us it was banging

it was unreal anyway he was he's got a real thing right so when we go to like we went to Birmingham we'll always same thing we'll have a curry after

or we'll go for like a mixed grill it's a dangerous game that by the way but he goes into a place Birmingham not in a way. Same thing, we'll have a curry after or we'll go for a mixed grill fight. It's a dangerous game, that, by the way. But he goes into a place. I've never seen anything like it. He asks where the chef is from. And if the chef's like Bengali, he will just walk out.

And I'm like, that's fine. I'm starving. I'm not driving around Birmingham at fucking... Because that's if it's a racist. No, no, but that is the thing I don't get. Because he's like, no, we're not going there i'm not eating that i'm not why he's so like and here but why is he anti it because it's not because it's not authentic india i'm not sure he like if it's like if if he goes to places like if if the person's from like you know like pakistan is what he's trying to look for all the time if If he can find someone from Pakistan,

he's fine. But yeah, cause I guess he's from Pakistan. That's what his vibe is. But yeah, or Sri Lanka. But if it's Bengali, he's like, you know,

he gets so angry. Hmm. I think you might have outed him as a racist there. I'm not sure. I don't know how. Most Indian restaurants are Bengali owned. Have I just made that up? Look,

I'll openly say curry, like having a curry is literally my favorite thing in the world. I enjoy it a lot. But I do also know that I've traveled a lot from all the avenues of my life into different places, different towns, and I'll always look for a good curry house. And yeah, the levels are, and also the levels- Have you ever eaten in Monty's in Kingston? Yeah, yeah. I lived in Kingston for a time. That's of, and also the level. Have you ever eaten in Monty's in Kingston? Yeah. Yeah. Cause I lived in that's Nepalese.

That's good. The Nepalese know their shit. They're they know their stuff. Right. Yeah. I've got to say the levels that they do a paneer. Anything with paneer is just another level. With the Nepalese.

Have you tried making your own homemade paneer? I mean, I'm speaking as a vegan here, so I can't have it. No, no. It's quite easy to make paneer yourself. As in, as in the actual, own homemade paneer? I mean, I'm speaking as a vegan here, so I can't have it. No, no. It's quite easy to make paneer yourself. As in, as in the actual, the actual paneer. I mean, I don't mean the paneer curry. I cooked a cauliflower the other day and. Go on, talk me through it.

So what I did was I used yogurt, turmeric, little, um, a little cayenne pepper. Uh, were you freestyling this or were you following a recipe? I freestyle when I, I start with a recipe and then I get bored. My ADHD, ADHD kicks in and I just go renegade vibe.

What a delight, what a delight for Catherine. She knows, she knows if she gets in, it's like a haircut. If she gets in halfway through, it's actually going to be all right. But you'll always take it too far.

A little bit of honey. Start going through the cupboards tomorrow. Why have you, why have you, why are you adding porridge oats? Porridge can go with anything. Yeah, a bit of texture. A bit of texture.

So go on. So was it nice? And then I roasted it for like, I think I roasted it for about 45 minutes. Yeah, it was banging. It was very good. It was nice. What did you serve it with? I served it, I made some pita breads.

You made from scratch? Yeah. Yeah some pita breads you made from scratch yeah yeah yeah as in you made the dough yeah man uh equal yeah equal measures um uh yogurt greek yogurt or any sort of uh nice a decent sort of yogurt and equal measures yogurt and flour little bit of salt a little bit of um bacon powder yeah what that together made a sick old dough let it for half an hour to proof yeah and then what those bad boys in absolutely beautiful how do you get the little split so they turn into a pocket well they don't they puff up and then you just with a knife you score them oh wow were they good yeah they were good as in better than shot bought bitters yeah yeah they're really good and then catherine cooked a doll and that's what we have for that uh we could

we do as a team effort. It was a little trip around the world with you three, wasn't it? Yeah, it is. Grace turned her nose up at all of it. Just ended up having a McDonald's. Ten months. We just blended a Big Mac and fries for her. Yeah, just get that in as a little smoothie.

Yeah, but do you find Just get that in his little smoothie. Yeah, but do you find on tour, eating-wise, that's the thing that I'm now, I'm really conscious of trying to eat well

because when you're gigging, it's so hard to eat well, isn't it? Well, it's very, the thing that I

find difficult is I don't really want to eat too close to the show. Yeah. Because, so then you go, I've made the mistake in the, well, the mistake to make is to go,

I'm going to save my big meal till after I get off stage. Yeah. Because then at 10.30, 11 o'clock at night, which is inevitably when you're sort of getting your food, choices, unless you're in like a city city, if you're in a small town, that's really tricky to get something decent. Do you know what I mean?

So what I end up, what I tend tend to do is this is really boring isn't it but what i tend to do is well i'll either eat way before the show and then just be starving or if i'm eating after the show i have to do a bit of research now grats my tour manager he'll do a little bit of grats is a g yeah he is a g he'll do a little bit of research and go let's hit up this spot after the show. But it's tough, man. I put on loads of weight. My first tour, I put on so much weight, because I was just like...

You just sort of go, okay, let's go find somewhere. And also being vegan, it's harder as well. I've turned up to the hotel, and everybody's been able to eat, except for me, because it happens loads of times. Turn up to a hotel, and they go, they've only got toasties which is fine i don't mind toasties but they've pre-made them and they're all buttered and then they just

go really sorry we can't do you on so then like it happens to be like it happens loads so then so now i've actually become conscious of the fact this story's got lost in less interesting the longer i've gone on but now basically i pre-research i research what they've got yeah i i would say now i'll apologize like i did a culture in colchester and i had like i went for massive curry beforehand it was the first time i've done that and it was literally it was a pile of dog that i was so fucked yeah i literally was in a worse food coma i've been in probably since 1998 what happened in 98 a big big pizza hut lunch oh yeah i remember you telling me about that yeah yeah yeah yeah that's where i got the tattoo um just a slice the pepperoni slice yeah and then never forget

underneath it's like across my stomach like tupac i've just got written just just remember your eyes aren't bigger than your belly um yeah but yeah man i was it's a killer like that that level of eating as well it just makes you so uncomfortable yeah and i realize now how greedy i am it's like we went to a thing on saturday right me katherine grace and my parents went to the thing and it was free food and free drink as soon as i hear that that, there was these amazing street food stalls, beautiful stuff. Honestly, Catherine had a salad with noodles. My mum's a vegetarian, so she went for a vegetarian route.

My dad followed me for a little bit, and then he looked in disgust when I had a bratwurst hot dog nice then i had um some pulled pork noodles right yeah right yeah then i thought the flatbreads looked nice so i tried one of those ate the whole thing and then i finished it off with a pizza right because that's these are the stores it had had four pints because it was free like yeah yeah washed down by four pints no because obviously you must you must have had a lot of empty space now you gotta you gotta get you gotta get some heavy pints down you know and then a woman was walking around with these trays of cheesecakes i literally i had two this

is disgusting i thought i had two cheesecakes from her right and then how big are these cheesecakes they're literally like like I say, probably just a little bit smaller than my hand open, right? Okay, fine. So she comes around with these cheesecakes. Then this happens to me a lot when this sort of thing, you know, towards the end of the day, like early evening,

when they're trying to get rid of the food now. She came past and she went, oh, you can have one more cheesecake, can't you? We don't want it to go to waste. Then I think that I'm fucking Superman stepping into the arena. I'll go, yeah, I'll take one. We don't want them coming. I end up with, say, three fucking cheesecakes, right?

Then they bring in a tap. There's an argument that a third cheesecake is actually better in the bin than in you. Yeah. No, no, no, no. At this point, Ron, I've become the bin. I am the rubbish bin now. Like, they're literally just thinking, they're looking over at me.

They're looking across at where they've got to take the dustbin bags and they're thinking, that's quite a walker. They're looking at you and they're just thinking, well, he's just over there. Shit, there's just two people discussing going, oh, fucking these bin bags are the shit ones. They split when you walk across them and You're going to get covered in bin juice. Why don't you just stuff them

into that fucking human bin over there? Right? So then, I've eaten all this, right? Then the guy who's making the fucking pizzas comes over and he says it really to me. I've made a load of pizzas that are extra, so they're going

to go to waste. Yeah. I convinced my family to take four pizzas home with us, right? Wow. Right. Wow. Bearing in mind that the rest of them aren't even hungry, right? We get home. Catherine makes herself a tuna salad, right?

That's her second salad for Catherine. Yeah, yeah. Catherine eats her salad. Yeah, but she's an amazing salad maker right my mom and dad have um some crackers um and some uh yeah something small because they've had a big they've had a big eating day i eat two of the pizzas i can tell how disgusting katherine is in me right i mean how much fucking dairy have you consumed at this point i'm literally 90 i'm like i'm literally just stuffing fucking dough in my like yeast in my

stomach like and like i'm at some point i'm conscious that i might even be allergic to yeast or the fact that i've eaten that much fucking cheese on the fucking it's disgusting we go to my sister's the next day what's my sister doing for a big lunch that we've got

as a family she's doing pizzas again I ate another pizza and I've literally this is no joke right over this weekend I've eaten

one two three four I've eaten five pizzas in two days I think what's more incredible eating five pizzas in two days. I think what's more incredible, eating five pizzas and the fact you had to top that up again. Do you know how bad that is, though?

It's bad. Do you know what? It's not bad. It's whatever. Do you know what I mean? It's not bad. You had a big weekend. But then I turned to Catherine and said,

I feel good for myself because I've not had a takeaway. She said, you had a McDonald's on Thursday when you got home from that gig. And you took four pizzas away from the fucking thing. Four pizzas that no one else wanted. Because I'm greedy. And you took away most of their waste as well. Genuinely, as I was walking out the place, people were slapping me on the back,

oh, nice one, get rid of those pizzas. So no one else is going to... I know myself that there's people who are going to have been there who are going to go, oh my God, did you see that big guy, how much he ate? Do you know the second pizza? The second pizza at the end of the day?

Yeah. When you're at home. Did that feel good? No. No. No. Also, Ron, let's not forget, right, these pizzas are fucking freezing cold by now. Did you warm up the pizza?

No, no, I just had it cold. So you ate two cold pizzas at home? Jesus fucking Christ. That's why I got up this morning at like fucking quarter to six to have a workout. And that's why I got up this morning at like fucking quarter to six to have a workout and that's why I genuinely now

I'm like you know what like I need to do something about fucking I need to like for me I have to be all or nothing when it comes to the diet as soon as I let a pizza into the door I'm having a fucking house party of junk food you know like when those people

put their Facebook they're in a Facebook party because their parents are waiting. It just goes out of control. That's what my diet's like. Yeah, yeah. I don't, I think you've been too hard on yourself. Look, you work hard. You work out a lot.

You just enjoy, you had an enjoyable weekend. I just think sometimes that shit happens. If you're living your life like that, then I think we've got a bit of a you know then maybe we i do question how much i even enjoyed any of the stuff or the fact that i just get overly crazy as soon as i see stuff for free yeah well i know i mean i do think when i see that stuff's free it flicks a switch in me yeah where like for some reason when it says free food or all-inclusive my brain goes food's about to be made illegal and then also like i always think to myself do you ever have this where you know sometimes when you're full up yeah and you leave you're eating something really

delicious yeah but you cannot finish you know that you'll make yourself feel really uncomfortable and horrible and you feel i don't want to ruin my evening here so i'm going to leave that even though it's fucking amazing yeah i'm going to leave it and then what happens is hours later or the next morning you're hungry and you think back to that time when you left that delicious bit of food and you think i can't believe i did i cannot believe i did that that was so i think that's what happens when you go to these because what's happened to you is i totally relate to what you're saying you've looked at all these stalls and you've gone i could leave here and not have tried something from one of these stalls i mean i might not have tried one of the cheese admittedly you don't need to try six of the things but you

could have you could have left going i wonder what that flatbread was like i'll never know now because i'm never gonna that's never gonna happen arguably because it was free what I could have done is just had a small I didn't have to finish all of the stuff off

but then also yeah I mean yeah you make it yeah you make a good point that is true what are you like at a free bar are you still crazy I used to be

but um I've had a couple of experiences recently where like I went out on Friday night party room was out in full effect where did you go I went to frictions album launch nice and I had a thing where I drank quite quickly quite early on and then I think I've talked about this before I got nervous I'd had four mini beers. No, I'm joking. I'd had like, I was in that brew dog in Brixton.

Yeah, love it in there. Very good. So it's really nice beer, but you forget that it's stronger. So strong. Mate, it's insane, right? So you're drinking them like, I forgot, because they taste so nice. So you just drink it, and then suddenly I was just like, why am I so battered?

This is mad. I'm not normally this drunk. And then I drink it and then suddenly I was just like, why am I so bad? This is mad. I'm not normally this drunk. And then I looked at the board and I was like, oh right, it's because this stuff is basically spirits. I'm fucking kidding.

Mate, this time of year, I think BrewDog should come. I love it. By the way, shout out BrewDog. It should come with a health warning because as soon as the cold kicks in,

there's something of that feeling like weirdly the summer didn't hit me as much. You have like four or five pints from there at that level, and then you go out in the cold. Let me tell you, it's like a whole fucking... The level of drunk just goes through the roof for me. It's a vibe, isn't it?

Yeah. Proper vibe. You're literally stagging around. You've been drinking fucking wine since fucking 8 o'clock in the morning. Yeah. It's nuts. But anyway, the reason i told that story is because a free bar now i don't get crazy because i realized that i could do myself a

disservice i mean i've in the past i've like really gone overboard and made a tit of myself so i don't want to do that again so when it's a free bar i just think enjoy the fact it's a free bar there is a slight issue of a free bar only being free until the money runs out do you mean and so there's there's part of you that thinks i need to hit this up before i have to start paying for these drinks i mean even even though you could happily afford the drink it's not like you know you and i are not struggling to pay for drinks for an evening yeah but at the same time there's something about getting somebody even if it's somebody you know that's fucking footing the bill, you still want to get on there.

You know my pet hate, right? At my wedding, I had a free bar, right? And people were coming up to me going, oh, fucking hell, do you want a pint? It's a free bar. And I'm like, it's not a fucking free bar. Because at the end of the day, I'm paying. In this particular situation, I'm paying for it.

If I go to a wedding and it's like, you know, you go up and you go, oh, just a pint and a gin and tonic and go to pay and i go oh no the bar's free there's not i i'd say human law is you literally go back to caffeine go get that danny quick because there's a free bar and it was going to run out quick yeah i mean yeah and it's like literally leather and pints going back and going like yo is this bar still free well i'll tell you what just give us two pints two gin and tonics yeah um actually we'll get a bottle of rose there's an argument actually that it's cheaper to just have the free bar and not say there's a limit on it because then people will like just drink casually whereas if they know there's a limit and after that point you're going

to start paying they just hit it up you know whatever that limit is literally smash for it right 15 minutes into the fucking wedding or the event, the barman comes up and goes, oh, the free bar's gone. Yeah. We had a wrap party that we had. Me and James put money behind the bar. And I swear, every 10 minutes,

the guy's coming up going, the bar's looking like it's going. I was like, this is mental. How much of it... Everyone's drinking the most expensive cocktails. It becomes like everyone you know and love dearly

becomes an absolute ruffian essentially it's just like a galleon was that on King Gary because I don't remember ever coming to a wrap party you did get invited but you didn't come

were there cocktails and stuff yeah at this wrap party that I didn't go to you were invited I'll go back for that. I must have been sitting in a tiny hotel room or something at the time. I definitely was devastated you weren't there.

Put it that way. Your diary, I remember us trying to move it around you, but we couldn't. Yeah, sure. I think this one was actually for the curse. The curse was a bit of a, because it was in Liverpool, so we sort of looked after people. It was during COVID.

Yeah. No, I get it. I get it. Do you do wrap parties for your stuff? We... Oh, you had a big one, didn't you? You had a glitzy one for avoidance. No, we didn't do one for avoidance.

Oh, no, we did do one for avoidance. Yeah, it was... Where was it? Didn't you do a nice one? Yeah, there we go. Fucking hell, boy. Fucking hell, this guy. This guy.

Made an absolute, absolute cock. That's the problem. I made an absolute cock on myself for that. What did you do just got really drunk i mean like i just did that i just have this horrible habit when i'm drunk of thinking that i'm really entertaining do you know what i mean it just sort of like you are entertaining you are an insane guy yeah but i would say that my experiences of you being drunk are very much like myself is that we've been in situations where we are we'll end up thinking we'll be quite chatty and then all of a sudden we'll i can watch you like me sort of wither down into your shell yeah the paranoia sets in and then you just watch someone else being far more vocal

do you know what it's weird saying this as a comedian but it happened to me the other day i get nervous when i'm in a group of people and the conversation stops to listen to the anecdote that I'm telling. I find it unbearable. I've got to be honest. I know that sounds mad doing stand-up, but I really do hate it. And so often I will just be pretty quiet.

Do you know what I mean? Because I'm not really good in those situations. I find myself just yeah becoming quieter and yeah like where you're like sometimes

it depends on the group of people doesn't it but sometimes especially but it also relies on how drunk different people are yeah

around that you know because there's a level of drunk where you think that everything you're saying is absolutely incredible oh god it's awful

it's the worst place to be yeah and and then the uh the other thing is is that um the the thing that's happened to me that has happened to me more than once is where people are telling stories and then you tell a story and you sort of realize midway through this doesn't have the payoff that you hope you do and then you just sort of fade out at the end like a pop song awful but you hit a moment like a westlife you know like westlife yeah really like they come off the stools and you're like oh mate this is the this is they're gonna end it here and then they go on for another like minute and a half and it just sort of dwindles out it would be like westlife getting up like it's a key change but it's just an instrumental bridge that takes you out to the end of the song

um we were talking about fitness you know what I'm going to do in November oh sorry sorry sorry I've got to apologise to you you were about to talk about this thing you were doing

this you know what I'm going to throw down right I'm going to do in November I'm going to do 100 press ups a day for the whole of November

for cancer research it's amazing okay are you getting are you getting sponsored for that or is it just for the Instagram stories? See, this is where you're a prick.

No, he's getting sponsored. But I need to know how you verify it, so that you're doing that. Oh, yeah. How many press-ups can you do in a set? many where are you where are you at i don't know actually i've never i've never tested my max press-up capacity i don't think do you know before lockdown i couldn't do one press-up i've never done a press-up in my life no i i was the same way i had to do it i had to do it on my well i i did do press-ups but i had my knees down yeah

and then yeah and then now i can do a press-up. And I would shout out anyone who feels they can't do press-ups. Like, number one, doing them on your knees, right? That's how I started. Like, I was doing, I got up. That's how I started, too. Like, literally started doing, like, having to do 10 on my knees, which is quite embarrassing with, you know.

Yeah. Like, your personal training. But then, and now I feel like you go like, oh shit, actually, well, from there to there, it just shows that you can, you can do these things. But there's something really like when you're watching,

and look, there's a part of me that thinks that the stigma of a gym is that actually no one really gives a shit about what you're doing for the most part. Yeah, that is true. If I could give somebody advice,

it's gone to, nobody really knows what they're doing and nobody gives a shit what you're doing. So just remember that. Anyway, go on. But yeah, I constantly had in my head that everyone was looking at me laughing behind my back that I was doing press-ups on my knees.

And quite a lot of the time, I'd do like three or four press-ups on my knees and just sort of get up and then just hope no one had seen me. And then actually committing to it. So I think think now i'm gonna try and do that you know when you just think actually i need something like this yeah i need to push myself through something like that i just don't know how you verify it but yeah i'm gonna do that so well i think you know if you're doing it for charity you we can trust you can't we i mean you're not gonna lie about it are you i'm a trustworthy kind of g yeah how are you thinking about doing it um are you going to do 10 sets of 10 or five sets of 20

i'll probably do you're doing it on no not all of them go probably i'd hope to do four sets of 25 or like two sets of 25 and then cut three two sets of 25 two sets of 15 a set of 10 yeah yeah that feels like a way of losing track midway through. Well done. Try and make the numbers more complicated if you can. That way you'll never have a fucking clue. Also, that doesn't add up to 50, does it? Two 15s. Two 10s. No, it doesn't. That adds up to 40. You're doing 90 there.

So what I probably need to do is, I'll do the press-ups and I will need someone who can count sitting next to me. I'll sit there with Grace good luck Catherine yeah no I know I

know you're trying to be a mum but I've got some press-ups here and I can't get to 100 so can you get on it please do you mind holding my phone getting this

on the stories as well is that alright looking forward to the day on day fucking 17 18 you can buff off in a vest and a little muscle top

getting that getting that pump on around 95. I'm just looking forward to the day that I can wear a Lakers or a Bulls fucking basketball jersey and not feel like a fucking, not feel like any... Hold on, with nothing underneath? That would be my dream. Yeah. Oh, that would be my dream too, because then we can

finally bring this podcast to an end, because I'm not fucking, I'm not doing a podcast with somebody who just wears a fucking basketball vest uh okay a pair of jeans oh jesus fucking christ skinny jeans the basket the lakers jersey look no disrespect to anybody that does that. You know, it's fine for you. Yeah, shout out if you do that. That's a vibe you need.

Right, should we distribute emails? Okay. This email is from, it's a follow-up email. And it says, hi, Rob and Tom. I decided to take your advice. So this is a follow-up to last email, it says here. Right. I decided to take your advice and antagonize my 6'7", 19 stone son.

This is the guy that, you know, the guy that his son was like hitting the TV with the balloon or whatever. And then he made him piss himself. Yeah. So I decided to take your advice and antagonize my 6'7", 19 stone son at a family gathering to ensure that I could piss myself to gain clarity. As Tom suggested, I indeed have family gathering. I've got no idea. I've got no idea. He's made it much higher stakes than he needs to.

I indeed antagonize my son instead of chasing me under a dining room to dining with over to piss myself. He got me in a horrendously tight headlock in front of the family and humiliated me rendering me almost unconscious as i was losing consciousness he decided he would squeeze tight as he felt i yet again embarrassed him by sending in my first email when i came around is this true this can't be true this guy was throttled to the point of unconsciousness by his son when i came around we hugged it out and through the tears of father and son love we parted with him punching me in my frail kidneys. I was thinking about Rom and his lazy eye and how I could repay the favour,

and I came up with this gem. Instead of Rom being a negative Nelly and focusing on the negative of his lazy eye, he should instead consider calling his good eye an athletic eye, making his shit eye instead a normal eye. I'm going to say you'd undermine this favour by calling it a shit eye. This seems a more positive outlook

and one of my better ideas. Based on your parenting, yes, I would say it's one of your better ideas, yeah. I'm more than happy to take credit for it if you want to use it in the future. Yours sincerely, Steve. I mean, Steve sounds insane. Is any of this fucking true?

I've been at a barbecue. This is fucking insane. I have been at a barbecue where people who were friends, I can't remember if I've talked about this before barbecue where people who were friends i can't remember i've talked about this before but people who were friends of us of ours um the stepdad antagonized the son into a wrestle and the son basically you know it went on for for an hour or so with a stepdad saying about being stronger and kept on ribbing the kid and in the end the kid's fucking throwing the son

to the floor it's one of Geoff Norcott's favourite stories and he basically it was one of the most indignifying things but the son's a really

sweet natured boy the dad's a bit of a prick threw him on the floor and then held him in a wrestle hold for like until the dad basically gave up

and the dad was like I'm not giving up I'm not giving up I won't fucking give and then in the end the son was like I'm not letting up I'm not giving up I won't fucking give and then in the end like the son was like I'm not letting you like you know

and then basically like he had to tap out because he was essentially like like Steve going to fucking KO it was fucking like genuinely

like at first everyone's laughing a bit and then it went on for say three or four minutes like this wrestle and like the actual fucking this whole

like and that's amazing if you're watching MMA or watching UFC and you're watching Paddy like and that's amazing if you're watching MMA or watching UFC and you're watching Paddy the Baddy smash someone if you're a fucking

quite a meek family barbecue and you're sort of standing there eating some fucking like half done wool sausages out of a fucking

naff old bun and you're looking down thinking this what happens after this and honestly it was so fucking embarrassing for everyone involved

like actually the embarrassment of the guy who's been choked out and the son was paled into nothing compared to the rest of us who had to watch it and feel like, what is he at? What's going on? Because this isn't over now. Like, one way or another, this is, you know. So in the fact of Steve, number one, you have to argue the fact that,

like, Steve, right, and my friend in question i won't name right both well done for showing some discretion for both of them it's not actually about the son it's about them yeah it's about them getting a way of feeling that actually this is going to be like so he's indignified his son in front of people to the point where his son felt the best course of attack is to choke him until he needs to lose if this is true right that means the things he said and done to his son during that barbecue far outweigh the thing that he's been choked out because at the end of it you you know it's just a whole thing like i've got to say steve like you know i don't know what you're like as a guy it was really stink to the kind of awful toxic masculinity and then to sort of put a cherry on the top of the cake you think oh i know what i do

i'll say something horrible about uh someone else who who's literally lived their life with with with the situation so how do i how do i potentially turn this positive like you're talking shit pal you're an absolute it's one of my pet hates man it's one of my pet hates i've said this before i think on this podcast i don't find it funny when people take the mckay out of your eye i don't think i don't i don't like it when you have to feel that you have to do it i find it's not nice it's essentially bullying right and if you can't think of any anything else to say about yeah don't say fucking anything because it's not fucking cool i don't i don't agree with it i've sat on fucking panel shows and listen people do it it pisses me off it really annoys me because it's a fucking

it's essentially bullying and it's not cool and like so for steve to do that i think you're a bit of a prick steve and if we lose a listener, then fuck you. Steve, thank you so much for your follow-up email. In all seriousness, Steve, I don't know whether anything you've said is true. I just find it really hard to believe. He must be making this up. I've sat and watched something like this tape up place.

So he might not be. I mean, he might not be. For me, I look at the situation I was in and I sit there and think, yeah, that wasn't just... It wasn't a cool thing to watch. It's a weird vibe well thank you for the email that I read with my athletic eye laughter music

music music music music music hello darlings this is Lisa Vanderpump will you join me in France for a new reality show meet my hand selected staff

as they work live and play at Chateau Roosevelt. Their job is to provide once-in-a-lifetime experiences for our guests. And of course, they'll have to meet my standards, and not everybody has what it takes. Vanderpump Villa has first-class luxury and world-class drama. I'll be there, will you? Vanderpump Villa premieres April 1st, streaming on Disney+. Discover the extraordinary with Echo, the spectacular new show by Cirque du Soleil. Opens May 8th under the Big Top at Toronto Lakeshore Boulevard West.

Tickets at CirqueDuSoleil.com. The world is yours to create. Echo, thanks its presenting partners Sun Life and its official partners Air Canada and MasterCard. This episode is brought to you by Secret. Secret deodorant gives you 72 hours of clinically proven odor protection free of aluminum, parabens, dyes, talc, and baking soda. It's made with pH-balancing minerals and crafted with skin-conditioning oils. So whether you're going for a run or just running late,

do what life throws your way and smell like you didn't. Find Secret at your nearest Walmart or Shoppers Drug Mart today. Okay, let's move on to the next email, which is from the Disgusting Pig. Fucking hell. I want it to be quite a good name for steve i think we might have uh i think we might have found an emailer with lower self-esteem than us which is uh a hard find uh thank you for the excellent podcast the highlight of my week and i will find myself chuckling like a madman when i'm out walking the dog listening to you sorry for the length of this

email but i feel like some context is needed to understand the advice i'm after i'm currently on my honeymoon on a lovely tropical island, something my new wife and I have spent a lot of money on, and at times look forward to it more than the wedding. That's totally understandable by the way. You shouldn't feel bad about that. Now, the resort we're staying in is an all-inclusive. I, like most men out there, see that as an opportunity.

Oh, my God, you're not going to believe this. See, this is an opportunity to eat and drink as much as I can possibly squeeze in my stomach at every mealtime. Wow, we really are pertinent. Last night, we went to the Alucard restaurant and had a sit-down three-course meal i was so scared of being hungry later that evening ended up eating four pieces of bread arancini pizza with sausage and peppers on garlic bread a chocolate dessert with ice cream three beers and a glass of red wine safe to say i was completely stuffed uh or what tom davis would call a starter not even a

single crisp or not not even a single crisp would have found room inside of me shortly after finishing my meal we sat down for some drinks i've got another beer at this point my body decided enough was enough my stomach started doing back flips i swiftly power walked out of the bar hesitantly followed by my wife violently heat oh my god violently heaving in front of punters and people having their late evening dinner i burst into a short sprint outside of everyone and proceeded to projectile vomit all over the lovely white sandy beach of the resort upon returning to my room i instantly felt better and it slowly dawned on me that within a week of being married i'd eaten myself to the point of violently throwing up in front of my now truly ashamed wife this of course

then triggered an anxiety okay this is not funny now this of course then triggered an anxiety attack because i convinced myself that my wife and i'll not be able to show my face in the hotel again through sheer embarrassment and shame anyway the advice i'm after is how do you stop yourself from eating until you're full full to the point of feeling ill and just enjoy your meal two how to deal with the overwhelming anxiety that follows an embarrassing situation like this any help would be greatly appreciated much love the disgusting pig number one i'm not gonna call you the disgusting pig i think i don't think that's needed my g i think um i think i should call you the wholesome pick uh listen number one having when you go back and listen to this podcast um there's literally no

advice i can give you to your first part of the problem because I still have a very gluttonous nature and it would be, uh, insincere of me to, to sit here and try and give you like, try and tell you to do something. I, I, I have a real problem in doing myself. Um, I guess my thing would be number one, I would say that you've made making yourself that sick might not even mean that it could have actually been something you've eaten not being quite right if i'm honest with you because yeah that feels like that feels like a mad that's quite an extreme thing to be that

violently sick would either be yes and because usually you just sit there with a stomachache and then just need a massive shit if you've um you know much so to be actually violently sick i don't know if that would be you know that would be down to how much you've um you know much so to be actually violently sick i don't know if that would be you know that would be down to how much you've eaten anyway look uh so i can't give you any advice for that because it was just yeah it wouldn't be uh wouldn't be white but what i can do is when it comes to living with any kind of shame or anything like that that's happened uh where you feel what you'll feel you'll feel like the magnifying glass of that whole room was upon you. And you'll feel that everyone was looking.

You'll feel like that's all that anyone's going to be talking about. And, you know, again, I've mentioned that earlier in how I felt about the event I went to this weekend. The fact of the matter is, no one's fucking even thinking about it.

Most people will probably think that you have, you genuinely, they're probably eating something that's made you quite ill and you've had to go and throw up more than anything people are probably questioning what they've eaten themselves there's a bit of a paranoia thinking what did he have to eat because fuck like if there's a little bit of wrong like bad bad seafood or whatever i wouldn't let it ruin your your time i'd try if you can to sort of you know again it just feels

interesting but i try not to eat as much but also it's worth remembering that you know your honeymoon and you know being like in an all-inclusive place with good food and good drink that's what honeymoon's for is to enjoy yourselves to eat well to drink well and enjoy you know don't let the anxiety of what's happened ruin what should be a really really special occasion it sounds like you're in an amazing place enjoy it don't let that cloud and also don't let it just become a thing don't let it become something that stays with you you know what it's like genuinely the best thing like the one of the reasons i've got into stand up is that i had like constantly things like this like embarrassing situations

kept on happening like through my life from being as long as I can remember like something you know I'd always be like

that self-deprecation or something would happen and that was one of the reasons to get on stage actually is quite cathartic you can actually sit tell a story make people laugh

I was doing that long before I was doing stand-up it turns into a funny story don't let it be something that defines how you are as a person in a negative let it be the time that you ate and so much that you threw up at a beach and then yeah and let find the humor in it and find the humor of your wife in it yeah she'll be embarrassed you know she might be a little bit pissed off that you ate that much but actually to be fair she was probably quite kind and probably sort of at the time put a general arm around you let it yeah don't let it don't let it bear you down would you uh great advice once again from tommy davis the wolf uh how do you stop yourself from eating until you're full to the point of feeling ill and just

enjoy your meal question one if we just look at what he's eaten there right i had four pieces of bread pizza with sausage arancini garlic bread chocolate dessert and ice cream three beers and a glass of wine i mean it's a lot but it's not like do you know what the trouble is one it's half of what I ate on Saturday. I think you're being too hard on yourself, man. I don't think you need to worry about this. Do you know what I mean? It was like a one-off thing. And I think Tom's right.

It's possible that just... Because the thing is, I'm assuming that you're somewhere hot. I mean, that has an effect. I mean, you have a day out in the sun and all that. And then you might be dehydrated. You might have a bit of sunstroke or whatever. I think just you're being too hard on yourself uh i would say in terms of dealing with it uh the overwhelming anxiety you need to just front it out i mean the truth is you don't know what

people are assuming like you've told us that story nobody else knows that you overate or whatever and we and i'll be honest with you i'm not even sure it is because of overeating that you ended up throwing up i think people thought you're ill do you mean that like yeah that's what i think yeah so um you know if i saw somebody being sick i'd either think they've been drinking or depending on when it was i think they've just feeling unwell do you mean i've eaten over going i won't be having the prawns or the scallops yeah i will not be having the four pieces of bread arancini pizza sausage and peppers garlic bread and a chocolate dessert with ice cream as well as three beers and a glass of wine okay that doesn't even sound a lot to me that's

not quite normal no that's what i mean that's what i mean i don't know i don't know whether that says that this isn't really a problem or it says that we have got a massive problem really a problem or it says that we have got a massive problem. It's always one of those things. So listen, uh, you're not a disgusting pig. Uh, you're a normal person that had a little bit of an overindulgent, possibly was ill. Don't worry about it. Uh, you were in a great place.

Enjoy the rest of your holiday. Just let, let this, let us dealing with this email, be you drawing a line under it and moving on to enjoy the rest of your honeymoon. Okay. Don't just absolve yourself of any concerns please yeah thank you this is from the bald eagle hi wolf owl and swan huge fan of the pod and of both your work big fan of avoidance and king gary the owl and i go to the same gym in the mornings oh nuts oh wow after not seeing the owl for a few weeks seeing him flutter in with a fresh looking fade in great shape all i could hear was a wolf's voice big in the owl with a wowzers looking fresh boy yes i often think about mentioning i'm a fan

of the pod and of both your work but i don't want to be that guy that interrupts your time uh as time in the gym is limited especially in the morning and appreciate a dangerous precedent will be set so just as a top tip just so just as a tip of the hat uh you're both a huge inspiration i love all your work it got me thinking what is the most inappropriate inconvenient place that someone has stopped you keep up the great work cheers to bald eagle thank you bald eagle next time you see me at the gym come over and say hi i'd love to chat to you not for a long time not for a long time just just a handshake i i like those ones when someone comes over and uh you know what i i find number one i now having a child i find uh we talked about this very early on in the pod i find it's always lovely if people come as

number one i think i i i'm not why i genuinely if someone comes over and says they've enjoyed the podcast or whatever and says some crime words and you have a little chat, I'm fine with that. My problem is, number one, when it's alcohol-induced, I find myself getting quite anxious. If he's anxious or angry... No, the reason you get anxious, and I relate to this, you don't know what... They might say something that ruins your day. That's the problem, do you know what I mean? Because I had this the other day.

Some guy goes, he wasn't drunk. I was at the cinema. I was just walking to get the kids from a kid's birthday party. And this guy goes, oh, you're Romesh, aren't you? And I went, yeah. And he goes, you're quite funny sometimes. Just wanted to let you know that. That's not right.

Yeah. Yeah. Anyway, go on. It's that wise guy attitude, right? It's going back to Steve's email and maybe I was a bit harsh but what Steve's done there is he's deflected a situation but he's tried to

by mentioning your eye he's tried to make that into a joke that he thinks you're funny but I don't think it's cool what people tend to do and I had it the other week with Grace when we were out for Sunday lunch a guy was drunk you know sort of three o'clock in the afternoon he'd been on the hours and then you're like I was with my daughter and he overly stepped the mark. That's where you're like, oh man, come on. I'm with a 10 month old baby here. And what you're talking about and how

you're being is aggressive. So then you end up sometimes swerving those places with my family. So, but for the most part, I'd say that people are pretty much decent i i think like yeah mine was pretty much like you know you finish a gig and someone's insisting you stay uh like in the bar and get pissed with them and then trying to sit like you go to the toilet and they're coming and trying off your drugs yeah yeah stuff like that is uh yeah. It's great. I mean, it's annoying. Or insist that you go and see their ill wife. That was, I reckon, the maddest one I've ever had in my life. If I'm honest with you, that was insane.

But yeah, I think that was... Did we tell this story in the book? We did tell this story in the book. Yeah, yeah, I think you did, yeah. Bald Eagle, first of all, do come over and say hello the next time we're at the gym together. Yeah, but what Tom said is right. It's not necessarily inappropriate, inconvenient places. It's when people are drunk.

I had one thing where I was walking past a kebab shop late one night. It's like midnight or something. Party Rom was in full effect. Gotcha. And this guy goes, genuinely, this is how the conversation went. The guy goes, oi, Romesh, my mate says you're not funny. And I just went, well, I don't think your mate's funny. And then he goes, it's such a shit don't think your mate's funny and then he goes

it's such a shit comeback but i was drunk and then he goes what you been like that for i said what i said i'm not being like anything he goes we've been like that what you like fucking getting leery for i did and i was like it escalated into a fucking confrontation i literally said back to the guy what he said to me it was crazy and then the other thing is i've had like guys come up and ask for a photo so many people by the way i i get nervous answering these questions because most people are unbelievable and that's like 95 percent are yeah and i love it i feel really grateful to be in a job where people come up to you and go i just wanted to let you know that i really love what you do because most people don't have that in their lives do

i mean and like i don't take it for granted occasionally you get people like normally when they're drunk i'd like a group of lads come up to like proper fucking like you know those hench like hench boys are absolutely ripped yeah yeah come on so he asked for some photos so i did the photos with him and then they sort of went um they just carried on chatting to me and i was sort of waiting for the conversation to an end not because they weren't nice l to me and i was sort of waiting for the conversation to an end not because they weren't nice lads but like i was with like friends and they went drinking it'd be all right if we um if we joined you for the evening and then i i had to just say tonight we we are still strangers like i mean we are like this is like being a nice chat but we are still

strangers and then like the other thing is you get people come up to you in the toilet and stuff like people start chatting to you in the toilet or uh okay i'll tell you what happened to like the other thing is you get people come up to you in the toilet and stuff like people start chatting to you in the toilet or, uh, I tell you what happened to me the other week. Um, I went to the toilet in a pub, I came out and then I got tagged in a message going, uh, just seen Romesh Rang and Athan's dick. Yeah. And I've had that three or four times. I've had someone take a picture in that scenario.

I mean like seriously, man, what the fuck? You know, actually weirdly, like I think actually the most awkward, man, what the fuck? You know, actually, weirdly, like, I think actually the most awkward, not awkward, the time that I actually hated the most was when me and you went to the England-Scotland game. Mate. And those guys were, like, they, like, because so on the way to the game, like, you were a little bit on edge, I'd say, like, and, like, you...

Well, it's because it's like you're at Wembley in, like, a highly charged game. Yeah. People like us don't come out of that well, do you know what I mean, in terms of interactions with people. And I was kind of trying to put a positive spin on it. We literally got out of the car, and the first thing we were confronted with is that fucking helmet who was coked up, angry.

But the level of aggression from him that came from nowhere. Just sort of shouting at me that I think I'm funny or whatever. Yeah, but again, his mates were lovely as well they all wanted a picture yeah chat about the football and he stood there just being really aggressive so so i guess you know it's that vibe man but yeah for the most part i love people i'm a people person i love a chat i like to i love it when people come over it's a vibe we're very blessed proper vibe uh okay should we do one more let's do one more uh this is from the wandering wombat uh wandering one back here i hope my email finds you well i've been loving the podcast since i was introduced a few months back and i thought

it was about time to send my question my My question is regarding my mum. Just before Covid hit in 2020, my mum found out her husband was six years old and had been cheating on her. The relationship fell apart from then onwards, resulting in her living by herself throughout the interseeing lockdown. Since then, she's been reluctant to put herself out there, not necessarily on the dating scene, but with friends. She would spend weeks at a time without seeing anyone and has relied heavily on me and my siblings for company and engagement. She seems to have forgotten how to interact with people and your normal social cues have gone out the window. During this time, my mum has begun relaying anything we say to her back to my other siblings as gossip. It's got to the point where

you can have a conversation with her but I don't actually immediately message her about anything we've said. I will caveat that by saying generally what she's relaying from our conversations can be as inconsequential as I've bought some new pants, found a new recipe on our fridge or stopped working. However, at times there can be personal thoughts and feelings on particular matters. It's gone from trusting your mum and telling her everything to not wanting to talk to her about anything through fear it will just become gossip. She seems to be seeking drama where there isn't any and stirring things up between my siblings.

It's been coming to a head as I'm getting married to my lovely fiancé, one bat in a week, and the incessant drama, mongering, gossip has continued. She now goes speaking about my soon-to-be in-laws. My fear is that she'll soon repeat something said by one of us that may cause a rift in our relationship as siblings and as we're all very close this would be devastating my question is how should i approach this topic with my mum i've spoken about it with my brother and sister and we agree something has to be said kindest regards wandering one bat tommy day uh i kind of get this as well because i i my mum is i love my mum with all my heart i love her dearly and uh

but she will be like a lot openly if you if you chat about something within seconds i know that she's on the phone to my sister or one of my aunts or sort of one of her friends and she's sort of and and not in a i don't think it's a negative thing i think it's just a term of comfort conversation i look my mum worked hard all her life. She, she, you know, she's retired now.

So I think there's, there's a situation sometimes where retirement and not like we all had this a bit during lockdown, right? Like you're me and you certainly talked about it. It was like, you, you go from having a really busy life to having not much going on.

So the smallest thing becomes like, you know, you still want to have the conversations, you still want to chat to people, but actually your topics of conversation sometimes are dwindling. So what you do is you go, oh yeah, did you hear about this?

I don't think it's a negative from your mom. I think if it's causing a negative situation, the best thing is to converse, have a chat. I think it's also probably worth saying that your mom's probably dealing with sort of a little bit of like a PTSD or a bit of depression if she's been through the situation she's been in.

It's a really difficult thing. Like, you know, we're just, you know, it was World Mental Health Day this week and, you know, me and Rom are big advocates of talking about our problems and both me and Romesh have done therapy and whatever. I think our generation are more open minded with that we're quite that's a that's the thing that we do there's times where I look at

both my parents and think like what could help is them chatting to someone and chatting to an expert and sort of you know especially sort of my mum has sort of lost two or three people in the last year and like I worry about the consequences of that like you know i know how what impact some had on me but for her i worry about her and how that's affected her mental health so i think i think it's probably just chatting to her and seeing if instead of going guns blazing and sort of you know try to do it in a sensitive manner and see if if that if she would want to talk to someone like you know if she would want to go through therapy because you know just sort of chat through what's happened to her but listen man sending your love sending congratulations good luck with

the wedding it's going to be the most amazing thing in the world and everything in life sorts itself out my g congratulations wandering wombat uh i would agree with tom uh your mom's been for a lot and she's not socializing so any of these chats that she's having become her news and drama and so while i'm not saying it's all right i do understand it so i i'm sure that you are but it's just a matter of sort of being sympathetic with the situation your mom finds herself in and sort of being forgiving of the way that she's behaving uh however it needs addressing and i think it's just kind of in the short term my advice to you would be by the way i'm speaking as completely unqualified in these situations but in the short term i think that you need to have a word with your mom about

not doing that and you can do that in a gentle and nice way and i'm sure she'll be completely understanding but in the long term i think you need to look at getting us some support and it might either be getting us some somebody to talk to or even getting her back out in the social circle getting back in the mix i mean and probably a combination of those things i think that's the long-term solution but it needs addressing immediately um so that that would be my short-term advice for you. But, you know, be sympathetic with your mum. Obviously, you know this better than we do,

but she's gone through it. And so this is kind of quite a natural reaction to that. She's not got a lot going on socially, and so you guys talking to her is essentially all that she's got going on. Do you know what I mean? So she's latched onto that, and I understand that, but it needs addressing.

Congratulations, man, and good luck with it all. Godspeed. Thank you so much. Guys, that is about all we've got time for here on the World Finale. Of course, I'm making that up because we could go on for longer, but we've just decided to make them about this length. So, Tom, could you please do us the the honors of taking us out yo what is a champion what's a champ is it a man who stands in a ring after a fight who's won and sits holding a belt

or is it a footballer who has navigated through 12 months of league action to put a medal around his neck or her neck? Is it a skier who wears a gold medal? A champion is someone who gets through every day with a smile on their face, who might win the smallest of battles, might win the smallest of things, to make them feel like the biggest winner. Don't put yourself up against others. Know that the wins in your life will add up. And at the end of it, when you sit down and you go to meet your maker and you look upon the league table of wins, they're the moments you can cherish.

They're the invisible medals you wear around your neck that say, here, we have a champ. Godspeed. I love you guys. Really? Yeah. Love it. Love it.

Guys, thank you so much for listening to The Wolf for now. We would like to be played out, JT, with a little bit of Kano garage skank freestyle oh please drop that particularly the lyric where he says you girls pum pum stinks like the a13 Becton exit guys we will see you next time take care of yourselves we love you all peace out from both the wolf and his feathery friendly out Boom, take care If you have a problem, opinion, feedback or anything at all, please email us at wolfalpod at gmail.com. That's wolfalpod at gmail.com. That's wolfalpod at gmail.com.

We'd love to hear from you, mainly because we don't have any content ideas. Thank you.