Wolf and Owl - S3 Ep 21: Marathon Rom & Marbella Tom

Episode Date: April 24, 2024

We’re talking… all about Rom’s London Marathon! A very achy yet triumphant Owl tells us about his amazing experience and the incredible support and encouragemnt that he and all the other runners received throughout the day. A massive shout out to everyone involved. Plus, Tom’s very different weekend on a boozy lads holiday, showing your age, toilet mirrors, risky restaurants, making friends with doormen and a surprise family visit. For questions or comments, please email us at [e-mail] - we’d love to hear from you. Instagram - @wolfowlpod TikTok - @wolfowlpodcast YouTube - www.youtube.com/WolfandOwlPodcast Merch & Mailing List - https://wolfandowlpod.com/ A Shiny Ranga Production For sales and sponsorship enquiries: [e-mail] Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Yo, what you want? Beak or jaws? Feathers or fur? Sharp teeth or feet with claws? Whatever's preferred They'll grant you all ass requests to steady your nerves Then podcast a body parts, get severed and served Bring your weak shit, wear the wolf and owler That ain't just a mistake, that's an awful howler Both of them are known to pull up at your shows Have the crowd witnessing the murder like they're rolling with a gang of crows Fuck their censorship, let em see the whole thing They stay dressed to kill, never sheep's clothing Dark enough to turn the sun to the moon, you'll see nothing All you hear's a huff and puff and a...

Expect killings, red spilling and flesh ripping Impressive innit, the death bringing its head spinning Just kidding, every word in this song's about you grown men dressed up as a bird and a dog Welcome welcome to the wolf and out of the wolf and our book outside inside inside Insight listen listen. This is how we do. Yeah, God bro, bro, bro, bro There's there's not less up fucking rest or let's not fuck about We need to fucking hail The king bro. I you know what? You You know you said you'd never run a marathon?

Yeah. I never thought I'd sit and watch a whole fucking marathon. Do you know what? Catherine was out. She had to, like we had some families, quite horrible family stuff that had happened. But so me and Grace were in together. We went shopping and we brought some snacks.

And then I sat down. I got quite excited. At the age of two and a half I was like, Uncle Ramesh is running the marathon. I was texting Flo for the whole thing. Yeah, she'd tell me. I was so fucking proud, man. Do you know what else really made me happy? It's the amount of people I got messaging and videos of you running around waving at people and just, you look like you're having the time of your life.

You're doing this incredible fucking endurance thing and also man, even now I get tingles bro. I'm so proud of you man. Thank you bro. You're so proud man. That's an incredible thing you've done right there. Thanks man. Well, I don't I don't want to I don't want to Go on about it too much, but I but just but that lot that weekend like doing the I Did the first radio to show thank you every month everyone that messes me about that

I mean like went and did Brighton that night. Yeah, I mean I got to got to the hotel I stand at a hotel next to the a2 and I got to be honest with you man I've never felt nerves like it. I woke up the next morning and obviously because I've not stayed at home I like being at home and like having least in the kids good luck or whatever So I obviously didn't have that they put a card in my bag, which is very very sweet And then I got I got up I got up in the morning. I felt sick, man. I felt so sick. I went down to the thing, Joel Dombit was there, like seeing all these people,

the nerves start to go up and up and up, to the point where people were commenting, like going, are you all right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. You get it? I saw it, as your pal, I saw it when you were all getting interviewed. Yeah.

I was like, bless him. I was feeling it, man. He doesn you were all getting interviewed. Yeah. I was like, bless him. I was feeling it. He doesn't need this right now. My anxiety was through the roof. So then we started and they all went off and I held back for a bit because I just thought I tried to find a mate of mine actually, Chrissie, who I did high rocks with, but we got separated. Anyway, I started doing it, and I was so nervous about going too fast early on and then hitting the wall or not being able to finish.

I really got in my head about it. So every time I- This is how geeky I'm going to be. This is how geeky, because your first two hits, you could see that, and then you had like, then you banged out like I think the next three stages your time like halved almost. You went from like 11 minutes, 12 minutes to 8.40. This is how geeky I was watching you. I watched you like an 8 bit

spectrum by the way. I watched the whole thing. I had it on like our iPad. I was just sitting there watching this. I saw like a couple of the updates that you put on. It was really touching. You put like a little screen grab or something on your Instagram. Yeah, I watched that. That was on the house.

It was on the house the whole time. But bizarrely, like, so I ended up, yeah, I ended up getting faster as the race went on. And then to the end, I was really like blowing a bit. But the people on the sides, by the road sides or whatever, it was unbelievable, man. Like, I look at them as well, by the way, and think, they're there for six, seven hours.

Yeah, and there were people, mate, with Ramesh signs. That like, it was like, and then as I was going past, it was just and then as I was going past like it was um it was just so wild like loads of people stopping for like selfies and shit like that but as I was running past like the noise and everything it was just it was one of those things where you go it felt like being in a film or something man it was incredible and like it just felt so good the issues I had were one, I was so scared of not finishing that I went so slowly in the first section. The other thing I did was I was so nervous about not hydrating properly. I drank so much that I ended up needing to take about four

pisses in the first 10 kilometers. I was talking to other people and they were going, you're only supposed to go once per half or something. Cuz every time you stop to go to the toilet It's like 10 15 minutes because it obviously is a cure whatever and it's ranked someone also I got about three or four messages with someone saying well Wish his time has been a lot longer because he was stopping and he was getting constantly stopped and have to do selfies and videos for People they're like no one else was doing it. Everyone else was like head down running I guess that's why people wear costumes right, but But they were like, yeah, Romesh was really kind with his time. He was literally getting stopped and mobbed all the way around.

I just sort of thought, as I said to you, I don't give a shit about the time. I just want to get round. Mate, you finished it. But mate, Catherine got home in time, right? And we were watching. This is like where we were at, right? We had your little figure, you hit the 40K mark, and then I'm like, it's a home straight. I was literally like, and I sat and you've got these three pictures, right, of you,

like the finishing line, and we're sitting there going, is that him? And like, in the distant one going, no, it's just someone last night. And loads of people wore orange, by the way, which is just the straight in. Yeah, I know, yeah, quite interesting. And loads of people wore orange by the way, which is frustrating. Yeah, quite interesting. And then you're like,

and then like the moment we saw you was fucking, yeah. You were very, very excited. Well, mate, thank you. And Beckett was doing the same. He said that his app didn't update and he thought I hadn't moved for like two hours. He said, he said- There was a lot of speculation on that.

He said at one point, he said he went for a nap and he got up and he said you hadn't progressed at all. And he goes, he texts Flow and goes said you hadn't progressed at all and he goes he texts flowing guys I think Romesh is collapse you need to go find him but um well that is me and Becky have the same sort of vibe on the basis that I was coming down off a fucking four-day bender in Malbaia yeah I text flow and she was like what you up to and I've had I've had like a McDonald's and a Domino's I was sat watching Ron on

Run a marathon feeling like an absolute fucking piece of shit No, man, it was It was uh, it was it was like you people talk about the atmosphere and stuff I mean again, I don't want to become one of these people that's like, you know One of these people that like they've come back from traveling and I start talking about it non-stop but the both that I would say both the support I got online and the support I got while I was running the thing it was pretty amazing. You mean you do it again? Well that's the other thing I was going to say to you I am in fucking pieces now man like my... Have you been in a cold plunge yet? No no okay

just hold on don't get angry. I'm cold plunging tomorrow morning first thing, okay? Yeah, you've got to do it, bro. I haven't had time to set up, but I did have a massage yesterday, and the masseur said to me, your legs feel very dead. We try and put some life back into them.

And she gave me a nice, but I'm in bits, and my toenails, I've never experienced anything like it. They feel, every time they make contact with a shoe or anything, they feel electrified. It's horrible. I think I might lose them all. I mean, they're pretty. Well, all of them, even the little ones.

They all feel pretty dinged up, to be honest with you. So somebody sent a photo in. Mate, I'll post a photo on Instagram. Somebody emailed in, one of the Wolf and Owl listeners, and they sent a photo on Instagram, somebody emailed in, a Wolf and Owl listener, and they sent a photo of me. And it looks like my trainers felt totally fine, but that photo makes it look like my trainers are three sizes too big. It's like my feet are in the front, there's like a massive gap between the back of my

foot and the shoe. You know, but that's why you're in shape now, so your feet will start looking massive. They'll start looking more more more like a big girl Do you know the person I just was fucking blown away by the way fucking either Graham should be like fucking Olympia Three and a half hours pushing some bro It's like like I to me was looking at the app and I Worked out how to watch you and I just thought I'll see how like the others get I'll see how I've I was getting on There's an either finished. I was like what the fuck?

Yeah, they showed a picture of him at one point and I was like he was sprinting We've got two and a half hours in and he was absolutely right. It's mental Yeah, and then I came home and had a big dinner with Lisa and the boys. And then one of the kids goes to me, oh, do you know what position you came? And I said, no, what position? And he goes, you came 64,000th. I said, well, there's only 50,000 people running this thing. And then thank God I realized that he was reading out my actual race number.

But it was a horrible horrible fucking moment Let's start you a different times. What a way. How's it work? well Basically because I was doing a bit of because I did that gabby interview you like they can't guarantee So you get waves right so you get waves and then within that wave they've got paces So I I got given a wave number and stuff, but then because I was doing press,

they said you can filter in whenever you want. But so I just, I waited around for a bit and then just, I just went whenever I felt like. I was trying to find my mate and when it became obvious I wasn't gonna find him, I just went. But I did see him halfway around. But I would say that when you hit Tower Bridge,

oh, there is somebody actually, I think his name's Sam. I was running with him for a bit and then I lost him. And I was like trying to encourage him the whole way round. And I basically lost him. If he happens to listen to it or any of his mates listen to it and he was saying that he was running with me for a bit, please get in touch because I just want to know that you made it round.

I couldn't get I couldn't didn't know his number or anything like his race number or anything, so I didn't find anything out about it. But anything I had, you know, I love that I never really because I've never if I'm honest with you guys, I'm not saying I've ever watched. Well, I love the battle. Obviously, the physical feat is incredible, but the actual like camaraderie of it is insane. Like, it's genuinely like actually like.

It's just like actually like it just like made like I was feeling a little bit hungover a bit down so I was watching it thinking this is just so fucking beautiful like how everyone's there for each other. Like I don't know if you saw the video of AJ. AJ was fucking hanging out with Lucas Aids and fucking sweet sweet soul that he is. I was like, you know what? This is just all about decency. And some of the people's stories that you hear on the way around, you just feel like fuck, man.

This is just, it's such a nice thing. And I, you know, man, I was very, yeah. So I just think, bro, fucking, I hope you're walking on clouds all this week, man. Love your broken toenails. Well, I would be, but if it wasn't so agonizing. But, and also, yeah. like right now I feel fine. When I go to get up, it'll be horrific.

But it's good man, but genuinely, every single person that's like donated, every single person that's, I feel wanky saying this, but every single person that sent support, like it was amazing, it was incredible. Yeah, unbelievable. But listen, I'm not the only one that's completed a marathon this week

because Tom Davis, you had your own four day marathon, didn't you? It was Tom Davis on a sort of stag day, but for... It was a 40th birthday. It was a golf trip. What I'd say is it's insane. Like I haven't been on a trip like that for quite a time. And I forgot that as soon as essentially as everyone gets to the airport,

they essentially become fucking 16 year old boys who've never left the fucking house before. Everyone just became, it was like, yeah. And I had like, it was a kind of heavy days of drinking, which was quite full on. Yeah, which I sort of quite enjoyed the first one. The second one felt like a marathon. It felt like, the first one felt like

the first half of the marathon. I was like, I'm in this, this is enjoyable. The second half felt like, oh man. And then we had a couple days of just, what we're sort of trying, the thing is I realized is, my friend, a lot. And then we had a couple days of just what we're sort of trying, the thing is I realized is my friends, a lot of my friends are in a situation where it feels like drinking is like, like we need to finish this by boozing.

And if you haven't finished on the Friday with a drink in your hand, you've essentially not finished the marathon. And I wouldn't have finished the marathon. I was done. I was like, I was gigging in Leicester on a Saturday night. I was like, and it's Yeah, like insane just a level of you know, the banter that sort of But I forgot what it was like of Having to make sure you're not the sort of butt of the joke. Yeah. Yeah, that's the it's a horrible realization

isn't it when you when you sort of it sort of turns on someone else. And you know, this is horrible. But at the same time, I am going to join in so that isn't me. Because I have been that guy on numerous trips. I have been that that guy who becomes, you know, it was insane is it someone always right, who, like, necessarily isn't like you get other people who do things that are quite embarrassing, but can he'll still sort of hold themselves in sort of quite fucking, like, high brown manner that in sense that they're sort of still quite high status, and you get somebody who's actually quite genuinely nice person, but they somehow sort of like, and this happened to me on numerous lads holidays. I think one of the biggest one of the biggest mistakes on a lads holidays to be genuinely nice

You basically are like the slowest gazelle if you're You can't have a kind of a sort of bloke that goes Oh, do you reckon we should get some get him some food like because I'm just bit worried. He's had a bit too much Oh really? I'll look a fucking mother Teresa over here then that's it you're done. Yeah, you know and there was one guy and he's sort of he's a very sweet guy, but he had a thing where he was just very sweet and like understandably and if anyone said something like about him like he just his view on the world would change.

It's insane as a social thing. His view on the world would change automatically. Like literally someone would turn around and go, um, someone made a thing about him having quite yellow teeth. He didn't have yellow teeth, but someone said, oh, you've got a yellow teeth. And he went, oh, I've got yellow teeth. If I haven't got yellow teeth. And then someone, you know, teeth are a little bit yellow and then he turned Maddie went yeah fair enough. Yeah, what do you finish and white them and I was like bro You kill it out so quick. It's like you You take that you got good enough teeth and it's like then that became the thing of like

Every time someone sort of say something about him. He just go Well, no, oh, yeah, fair enough. Actually, you're pretty right. This is insane and we just go, well no, oh yeah, fair enough, actually, you're pretty right. I was like, this is insane. No, but do you know what's sad about that is that sounds like, the way he's behaving, it sounds like the sort of thing that people tell you how to deal with bullies.

Like if somebody goes out, you know, it's like your parents going to you, like if you're, if people at school say you've got a big nose, just go, yeah, I have, I probably need to sort that out. Oh, mate. I have, I probably need to sort of... Oh mate! The hilarious thing is he then started sort of, because I was trying to be quite nice, and I didn't really know him as well as everyone else and I'd sort of try and have a bit of a chat with him so what he tried to do I think is just

think that I was probably the sort of like closest sort of rock to him in the sense that he wasn't going to have to take other people but there's a good chance that he could overtake me so when the when the you know when I was I'm not gonna drink now I'm sort of done with the boozing that became his way in of like sort of trying to sort of Push me down into the place where he was Yeah, I can't blame him for that, I mean It was it was quite yeah, but yeah, it was very full on that I'm still if I'm honest

I still don't think I'm quite over it. Yeah Did you feel like It was something you want to do again? No not like that you know what it's it was a real eye-opener to me going like you know what that was probably the last dance I sort of just I didn't I had a laugh there was there was fun enough times but I just don't think I've got the minerals now. I don't really enjoy drinking like I used to. I like a beer, but I don't, that sort of like, started drinking at six in the morning and finishing at about 1 a.m. is like fucking, that's just so long, man. And it's just like, you get to a point

where if you try to have a conversation, like you look around and everyone else is in a place where they can't even, and I can handle my booze, I'm pretty good drinker, but I'm like like this is now feeling quite charming and I just think Yeah, is it you change? Yeah, I mean if I'm gonna be really I'm really missed home as I miss Grace and I miss Katherine quite a lot and I just saw for fun It was only four days, but you know, you sort of I think has been in the nature of our jobs We're on the road know, you sort of, I think has been in the nature of our jobs, we're on the road anyway. So sort of, yeah, I don't like man. It's, I thought like, well,

this is a sheriff's badge and I had this, had this along now. I'm done. I can't just that. But yeah, I don't even know. I don't even know if like, this, this pubs and bars now that are like quite like lively and I just feel like not only should I not be going to them now but I should not be going to them as a sense of duty to the other people who were like young who are still sort of enjoying that sort of thing. If you look if you think you're in quite a cool place I mean if you then look across and see a bloke in his mid 40s just sort of looking like yeah

Rekindle something you actually there's actually an argument that you're ruining it for other people You know the bit that really showed me I was like on the second night there I went to the toilet in this we're in it like a restaurant bar thing and there was two lads having a fight in the Toilet and I broke it up and I was sort of trying. What did you do? And they were like, when they were sort of going for each other and then I was like, whoa, whoa, whoa, yeah, I just sort of stood between them and then they were sort of, quite clearly mates had fallen out and then I started trying to reason with them, like, you know,

there's no point falling out and whatever. And I sort of, it was in the toilet as I'm sort of talking to them both and they're sort of like calling each other stuff and yeah I think it was, what I could ascertain is one of them lost some drugs that they brought, yeah. And I was sort of like, yeah. It's really not worth it. It's sort of stuff we argue about. Yeah, yeah, yeah, you know, you're carrying around a packet and you drop it in the toilet. Tom, where's the fucking Hugo? I've got an ear motion in my pocket. Oh, for fuck's sake, I need a stifter, mate.

I need a boob board. Hugo, I'm fucking straightening out here, mate. LAUGHTER I'm fully punched deep. I can't go on. I've shat myself. Um... Yeah, but they started... And then I was sort of going,

look, there's no point falling out and chatting to them as best as I can trying to ease them with them. And then I sort of caught a look at myself in the reflection of the toilet mirror and these two sort of lads in their early 20s and I sort of stood between them. You know when you just go, I look really old. I look really like, I look at a reflection of yourself like a fucking sad old bouncer. Look really old Fucking sad old bouncer Tom it's it's the it's the toilet mirrors man, right in a pub or a bar, right? And what I mean by this is that you you can convince yourself you're looking good sometimes

You know you get dressed up and I know we both like our clothes right so you get dressed up and you think I look quite dapper did it there right you go out and as long as you sort of don't see yourself in context you sort of all right right it's when you're stood at the sink in a toilet and there's like a bloke that's of the proper age to be in a place like that stood next to you and you just look across and you're wearing similar stuff, but your face looks like it's hanging off your skull a bit more than it does, do you know what I mean?

And you're just, this stuff's not sitting quite right on you like it is on me. And then you just sort of go, oh fuck. Like that is- Well that was very, mate, I stood there and I like, I thought I'm in pretty decent shape, right? Yeah. And I looked and like, I was wearing the quite, like I brought a nice top and I thought I was in pretty decent shape. I was wearing a nice top and I could see, I'd had a couple of drinks, I'd looked like

I had a big pair of tits and a fucking cut. I looked like a homo-zipser body. The shirt I'd had that I'd left with, I was going, oh this is hanging nice, it's now just hanging off bits of fucking fat flesh I just sort of like looked at myself I looked like yeah you know like Tony Soprano and this is Big Big like hi I'm breaking up a fight I was just like and I sort of was and they were both in white t-shirts put really nicely tanned fucking shorts you know and I sort of was standing you know come on lads you, it's not worth it. Oh fucking all right Pathetic no, listen, you did a great you did a good thing man Oh, you know, but you know, we just you know, I walked away and neither of it

I do know what I think that cheese it what I'd love to think that My wise sage words were the thing that like sort of called the situation down But actually I think it was like a sort of like bonded experience of like who the fuck's this dickhead? Who's this silly old prick? He's never had a friend let alone a fight. I was just like I'll see you both later. In a way they sort of made up in their united kind of feeling sad about you. It was quite sweet. And then basically went to the table and said you know when me and Brad left we were having a fight, you know we were having a fight right so in the toilet about to fucking kick the fuck out of each other there's fucking big stupid idiots coming. He's crying because

he's talking about his mate running the marathon right. Saying you shouldn't fall out of friends right. And we're like what the fuck then we're just laughing at him, like, you know, he's got all his shorts are stuffed up his bum. I'll tell you what we should do, right? Like, do these shots and let's kick the fucking granny out of him. This'll do another line, right? Let's do another line.

No, no, don't do that, mate. Don't do that, mate. No, no, no. No, no, fuck him, fuck him. Fuck him. Start hitting an old woman, Brad. Start hitting an, don't do that mate. Nah, nah, fuck him, fuck him, fuck him. Start hitting an old woman, brad. Start hitting her. Oh mate.

I think I might have, this is quite late for me to say this, but I think I might have moved onto my restaurant. Restaurants is my evening out phase of my life now. Yeah, a restaurant's a nice thing. Yeah. I think a vibe in a restaurant a sweet thing. I think cut the glasses of wine a bit of a laugh I think when you're trying so hard to like that I can tell you it's just nothing but it also like we

Don't when you go to a restaurant and it's sort of Went to a restaurant over there And it's it's owned by David Bentley and Stephen Carr, the ex-footballers. What type of food is that? It's a fusion cooking of stuff that's popular in the Zeitgeist at the time. But then you're in that other mix where it's a lot of people in sort of blazers and sort of work power. Can I just say, I cannot fucking believe you went to this restaurant. What made you go to that restaurant?

That was one of, two of the guys we were with are massive Tottenham fans. So they wanted to go just, yeah. Fine, I'm a massive Arsenal fan. I don't want any of them to cook for me. No, David Bentley's not out in the fucking kitchen. Stephen Coles is waiting tables. What do you know about fucking restaurants? Mate, I think they've invested, but I don't think... Yeah, and look, mate, do you know when we were out there by the way, someone told me, as I was sort of coming out and talking, someone shot this place up with a machine gun the other day.

Jesus Christ, I can't... That sort of covering that up. Someone shot this place up with a machine gun the other day. Jesus Christ, that's a story that's going to be an unexpected turn. Yeah, exactly, Ruff. I'm like, OK, let's just. And I live in a world of paranoid state, right? So we were sitting right at the front of this place, and then I'm just thinking, what if that person comes back? Yeah, fine.

But there's an argument that it's a lower probability that's gonna happen again, isn't it? I mean, it's incredibly unlikely, incredibly unlikely for a restaurant to get machine gunned. Yeah, yeah. I would say even more of the likelihood of it getting machine gunned twice. Also, by the way, could I say that-

While the star of King Gary's in there, and the director. Could I say? Really, really, really. Could I say, I forgot about bounces as well I forgot like the different like nice bounces bad bad like so the guy first told me it was being machine-gun was he worked there he was I was chatting to him and he was like when I fell her and then I sort of turned to all the other

doorman who's working here and I was sort of at this point yeah it's quite like ranchers sort of like conversation going on with my friends. And I sort of looked to this doorman as he went, I said, Oh, God, I suppose it was scary. You know, in this place, you know, with the machine gun attack, and he said, Who told you about machine gun attack? And then I was like, What? And he went, Who told you? And I was I looked around at the other guy, and I thought, I don't want to drop him in it. Yes. Yeah, because he might be like, yeah, he could be the low-growth common denominator So I was like, oh, no, no, I saw what I was just talking about and he said who said so

He was really and then he just said you don't talk about the machine gun attack And I was just like he was really and he just screwed me out for like my whole main course then I mean mistake He's just staring at me. Okay, was to tear my head. And he was like a Russian guy. He was like proper fucking terrified. Listen, that does sound bad, but what made you open with mad about what happened with the machine gun attack? What incredible thing to say. What do you mean? I was just trying to, I thought, no, I thought like I was actually giving him some credit.

For giving him some credit for what? Well, right, right. I'm going to tell you that I can't leave it. I wish I could. If you work at that restaurant. I have to make conversation at times. Yeah, sure. And it angers me that I do that. But he walked past and he sort of looked to me. I looked at him and I thought, like, the only thing I know about his life is he's probably here for the machine gun attack or he wasn't there for the machine gun

attack and he sort of like holds himself accountable. Just just just just answer this question. why is that better than saying nice places? Why is that better? Just if you give me any reason why that's better. Because I bet he hears that every night and also if I'm going to be honest with you, Rob, I was more interested in the Machine Gun attack and I didn't actually think it was. Sure, okay, so now we get to the bottom of it, right? Also, I didn't want, like, same here,

we become friends, right? Same, like, nice places. I'm not there now, because you might stop shutting up about fucking machine guns. Yeah, I'm not there now, he thinks I'm a piece of shit, but if I go, oh, nice place this,

and he's like, oh yeah, you know, cool, and we start chatting alone, and he said, oh yeah, you love the place so much, you should come back, like, wherever you're in my bay. And then I'm like, you know what, it's out of all the restaurants I went to it's a nice restaurant But I want to try the restaurants because I've read our fucking relationship started beat with me saying oh, this is a lovely place Is it then like do I get to a place where I have to go there all the time just to hang out with this guy? What the hell is it so what what the hell are you talking about?

What the hell is it so what what the hell are you talking about? I don't even know if you followed the You just said a lot of what just explains every conversation Yeah, the idea that this conversation could be the birth of a new friendship, right? Yeah, I look out for Stefano right whatever his name is right. Oh, yeah I'll say to Katherine right we're going my bio when we get out there, we'll be able to pause, like, oh, gonna meet up with Stefano a bit later. Who's Stefano? He's a doorman, I told you I had a laugh with. Who works?

Yeah, right? So, basically, if I turn around to him and say, oh nice place this is. So, Kat, so let me just get, let me get a sec. Kat's on holiday with you, and you said you've got to meet this guy Stefano that works at the door of this place? Yeah. Okay, alright, great. So that could happen.

We'll just go have a coffee and like some... Do you want to go to this place? What's so good about it? Nothing particularly about the place, just I know the doorman. Oh, okay. That feels like one of the best. If I know a doorman, can I say if I know anyone who works in a restaurant I'll go there and show off. Okay. Even to your own wife?

Mate, definitely to my own wife because then she goes, fucking hell, wow, like you know someone who works here and I'm like yeah, hello mate, you all right? That's, first of all, I know what Kat's like and if she's anything like Lisa, what'll happen is, this is what'll happen, I'd walk in, I'd go, all right Stefano, how's it going? And then I'd go, all right Romesh, how's it going? We'll go sit down and the lifts go to me. That was really fucking sad. I go all right Romesh, how's it going? We're gonna sit down and the lifts go to me. That was really fucking sad and then I know And then probably the starters would be quite quiet and then eventually by the time the mains arrived she got over her sort of

Embarrassment on how I just behaved So anyway just explain to me so you start off talking to Stefano Yeah, so so I don't want to start off with sort of a name chat about somebody that he is all the time. Oh, nice place, this. You know, I want to get into the meat quite quick. Right. So like, you know, going hey, hey, as he walks past, I go like, you know,

stopping him sort of slightly. You're raising your hand there, so you touching it, right? Oh yeah, like I touch it sort of, like gently touch it, it's not not confrontational because he's a dormant So he's had training probably been in the army. So it's a sort of like that as he's passing slowly like that. I go Yeah, that's horrible. That's horrible. I would never I would never ever touch anyone That is bananas and that is the way that you initiate fucking interaction with somebody no That is bananas, that is the way that you initiate fucking interaction with somebody. No, it's like that.

I'm sorry. No, I know that. I know it doesn't matter which way your head's tilted. You're still putting your hand on him before you say anything, right? Yeah, but otherwise he's just going to walk past. Yeah, good. Let him walk past. He's probably on his way somewhere.

Why don't you just naturally organically wait until you actually see each other and then you first... Yeah, but then I've got to say, what would be better? Me standing up and then he thinks I'm confrontational. So, so let me, hold on So let me just get this straight. So he's walking off to do something. You put your arm on him. He's walking past the table.

Yeah, to go and do something. So you put your high end on him. He turns around and then you go, what about that machine gun attack? I mean, what the fuck do you think you expect him to do? Well, I thought he'd probably just go, come on, that was crazy. Yeah.

Right. It was was crazy. Yeah. Right. It was insane crazy. Yeah. I was terrified. And then he'd pull up a chair. And I'd sort of go, oh, yeah, pass him a little bit of water because he can't drink his own duty. Yeah.

Do you want one of these chili prawns? Yeah. And we'd certainly just go, yeah, dinner day. He's like, oh, you know, I haven't seen you here before. I was like, oh, yeah, it's my first time here. And we sort of start having a bit of a bit of a laugh. So how do you get to be an adorman? Or you used to be in the army or something? Christ. The thing is, I don't even think this is the stuff of fantasy. I think this is genuinely

what you think. I genuinely think this is you envisioning it happening. Yeah, no, that's what I thought could happen. And then literally, like, I probably will go back to my bay, I've been there before, and then I'd sort of walk past the bar and he'd slap me on the back and go, hey, hey, big guy, you know, how are you, man? And I'd be like, oh, fucking hell, I forgot about you, you know.

Yeah. You say forgot, Tom, you walked past him eight times. When he said to you, who told you that, were the others at the thing listening? Were they in on the conversation? What, my pals? No, no, no, they were at the time. They were quite... Yeah, they were sort of chatting about stuff. They're quite out of it. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I would have loved to have just been sat there and see you like, just talk to each other and shit.

It was quite embarrassing. I was flying with it quite a lot. Also well out there, I've got a new TikTok addiction. Go on, tell me. Mate, number one, my new favourite person on social media is Angry Ginge. Why is your favourite? Theo's going on about him. I watched, so him, Young Philly, shout out out Young Filly, absolute guy, H, and they've got this, they've got a FIFA teams, like pro club, what's it called? Girth and Turf.

Yeah, so Theo's talking about Girth and Turf, did um, did Luke Lytner play? Yeah, Luke Lytner, and Wayne Rooney, he's playing for them now. Right. Like, this is an insane thing. So I, like, yesterday was like, I watched quite a bit of it. I was, cause I just find it quite funny, the band that they have, I find it quite, yeah, I was in the midst of that sort of band myself.

Your mom jokes and stuff like that. Not got a lot on at the moment, have you? You sort of track the marathon out on Sunday, spent all day doing that, and then yesterday you were on Gir Gurfin Turf all day. Well, if you want to talk about how bleak and pathetic my life is, I sat eating takeaways. On my iPad I had you running a marathon,

which is probably one of the most fucking incredible things that human feats of fucking physical prowess you could do. Right? So I had the marathon on television, you on a fucking app running around right on my fucking phone I was looking at tiktoks all the time my daughter's looking at me going what the fuck is this guy who is this what a lesson for young G just just laying on a in a 1994 Roy King island shirt and a pair of grotty old shorts. Hmm. I was like, yeah.

Yeah, well it's good for us to know. I'm going to say, after you finished with the marathon, by the way, and I had like this sort of retrospective look at myself, I said to Catherine, I need to fucking get back in the gym again. I literally feel myself slipping back into a world where. Tom, Tom, Tom, let me just stop you, okay? Right, for the last God knows how long,

you've been eating carefully, going to the gym, right? You have one week in marbs and then like a couple of days of intake. I suddenly think you've fallen off the wagon This is the If I let myself fall into a trap of that becoming my life. And like that sort of, you know, lounging about, I would be like, oh man. I mean, I will say, yeah, just in sort of like, I took Grace, we had a nice time at the park. We chilled at the park.

I still had you on the app as we went to the park. Grace is quite fearless as well. She's quite like, she's trying to go on rides that are far too big for her. She's got her new thing. She used to sort of kick off if you said like, she wanted a lolly or something, or like something, you're like, no they can't do that. And she used to just have a massive tantrum. She's got a new thing she's doing. I don't know if your kids do this. She just goes, please, please, dad, please. And you're like, it's literally, it's adorable thing. She stares right at you. And it's so cute and so funny that you end up just going all right. Yeah, cool

And now the caffeine so she's doing a policing all the time. I think cuz now I've relented There's no there's that you're not poor I for working out you've basically shown her that that works Yeah, yeah, it's so cute and adorable that yeah, I just yeah But it is manipulation you realize that yeah, yeah, yeah, I fall for that shit. Yeah, it's cute and adorable, but it is manipulation, you realise that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And also I'm proud of her that she's got that in her mix. Yeah, yeah. Oh, actually, I forgot to tell you this. So imagine this, right? So Saturday I do the radio show, then Saturday night... Shout out the radio show.

Yeah, thank you for everyone that got in touch, it's pretty mad. Then Saturday night I do the show in Brighton. All right, so yeah And then I'm and then after bright and I'm getting driven straight to London to start the hotel to do the marathon the next day So I am I'm sitting in the dressing room I Get a knock at this about quarter past seven. No five past seven. I get a knock on the door grats tour manager It goes wrong. Is she decent I go. Yeah, and he steps to one side least this about quarter past seven, no, five past seven, I get a knock on the door, Graz, tour manager, he goes, Romesh, you decent?

I go, yeah, and he steps to one side, leashes from the kids. He asks about decent, by the way. I know, well it's because I'm naked, I'm always naked. So he has to double check. He never knocks. Oh, at least when the kids come. So he knocks on the door, he goes, are you decent?

I go, yeah, he steps to one side, leashes from the kids, surprise visit. are you decent? I go, yeah, he steps to one side, Lisa and the kids, surprise visit. I mean, I was buzzing, man. It was so fucking lovely. You know, like, it was just incredible. It was so nice to see him. And then, but the problem here, well, not the problem, Lisa said it was absolutely hideous

to walk around the venue because they've got no idea that that's my wife and kids, most people. So it looks like a woman has brought three young children to watch my stand-up show. Apparently one of the venue staff went up to her and went, you're not supposed to bring kids to this. And then Lisa just went, if they're his kids, I think it'll be all right.

Wow. I mean, I don't think she said it in that, I made it sound like she said it quite aggressively. I think she felt quite... Yeah, I was going to say it really passively aggressively. Yeah, yeah, no, no. She said it was quite... I don't know Lisa. Lisa's not that vibe.

She has some... I'm going to be honest with you. My respect and admiration for Lisa, if she had said it like that, we'd have gone up the roof. Because basically Lisa almost told them that if we made a film of our lives Lisa was going to be played by Junior Roberts because that's the sort of vibe that Junior Roberts would deliver that. No she didn't.

They're his kids. They're his fucking kids. I tell you, have I told you this story about her **** when she did actually get a bit like that? Oh really? I shouldn't really tell you. Anyway, well I'll tell the story anyway. I was doing a quarter final. It was Lisa's birthday, right? Can I say by the way, I found a

an intolerable bunch of fucking breasts. Okay, well that's much worse than anything I'm gonna say, so let's get into it. So. I think if it's who I'm thinking, maybe I'm wrong actually. I don't know, my brain is. Well let's not name them.

Let's just... I will just say, like, so I was in the quarterfinal, right? I take a heavily pregnant Lisa with me to the gig, right? On her birthday, on my head. It's a terrible... It's a terrible, terrible birthday. Anyway, so she comes with me. The organizers of the competition say that she can't sit with me because I've

got to be in an axe area. So I get taken on. So she goes and sits in the venue, like we arrive together because axe have got to get there early. So she goes and sits in the venue. So she gets moved right from the front. So she sits at the front and they go, you can't sit, or nearest the front or whatever. Oh no, sorry, that's a lie. she sits at the front and they go you can't sit or nearish the front or whatever no oh no sorry that's a lie she sits at the back she would never sit there but she sits at the back and they go can you

move nearer the front right she's like I don't really I mean I'm real I'm the wife of one of the contest I don't want to put him off by sitting in the front and they go well can you need to move a bit more to the front she said it was quite firm how they spoke to her yeah so bearing in mind she also didn't get a free ticket, she paid for a ticket right. So they're quite firm with that. She moves a bit further forward and the organisers then again come over to her and say you can't sit in those seats, those are industry seats. And she says look I'm not being funny, I'm heavily pregnant, I was sat over there, you've moved me, I've moved over here,

you've moved me again. And then they said to her, bearing in mind that you've got a connection with one of the contestants, it doesn't reflect very well on them. To which Lisa said, well, I'm not that bothered how it reflects on him. She was obviously fronting up, do you know what I mean, because she was a bit like a barbie.

Yeah, good for Lisa, fucking Lisa's been pushed into a corner. If I know Lisa, you don't push Lisa into a corner. Absolutely, nobody puts Lisa into a corner, particularly not... So then Lisa said, well I'm not that bothered about how it reflects on him, it's just I've been moved. And then they said, you wouldn't do this if this was a comedy store, which Lisa said. They said that. That's pathetic.

And then Lisa said. That's the worst fucking thing. You wouldn't do this if it was a better corner club. That's so tragic. And then Lisa said. Wait, that's almost like a fucking, that's exactly what my fucking mate on the fucking Holland Stagley would do. And then Lisa goes, well, it isn't a fucking, that's exactly what my fucking mate on the fucking Holland Stagley would do.

And then Lisa goes, well it isn't the fucking comedy story is it? Wow! I know! Don't gaslight me, don't make me like I'm the fucking aggressor in this. But anyway, as soon as Lisa said that, so they left her there, as soon as she said that, she felt horribly guilty. But she was defending herself, you know what I mean, it's not, you know, she said that, she felt horribly guilty. But she was defending herself, you know what I mean? She was like, and I don't blame her at all,

but she still felt guilty regardless. So I walked over to her. Who did she, if I was her, I'd have just like looked through the other acts and just gone, well I'll tell you what, and then said, I don't know, like fucking, yeah. Yeah. Barry Dodds is fucking, like, I'm here with Barry Dodds.

Yeah. Do you know what I mean? Yeah, yeah. It's that kind of quickness of thought that could have saved her at the moment. Anyway, she goes, I go over to her and I said, are you okay? And she said, she told me what happened. And then in fairness to, well I say in fairness to Lisa, this doesn't reflect great on me,

I said, are you all right? And she said, yeah, she said, I just don't think you're going to get through because I'm really sorry, I don't think you're going to get through because of what's just happened. And I said, it doesn't matter. And then I said to Lisa,

should we just go? Let's just go. I don't mind, you know, because if your wife's been spanking to you like that, who gives a fuck about comedy competitions? So I just go, let's just go. And she goes, Rom, if you go, I'll feel too terrible. Just do the thing. I mean, let's just go straight afters, which is what we did. But that's one of the only times I've ever known Lisa to kind of, uh, did you, how did you do it? Did you, did you

go out in that round or? No, I went. Obviously I'm on my fucking ranganation. Whoa, wow. Swanky fucking artist ran the marathon. Self deprecation's gone, baby. Love jokin' at it. I mean, I did go through, but it was... Yeah, yeah. But I did go through. Yeah, that's banging, boy. That's banging. I think it's because Lisa did chase you with someone else. Just talking about heartwarming moments. Sorry, man, sir

Like when I came back by the way Heathrow, I didn't get this guy's name I was a very bad state But I was waiting for my baggage and a guy came up to me and he'd flown over from Australia I believe and said he'd listens to this podcast But he came up to me and he said like you know he's fine over and he's got a family member who's been unwell and he'd flown back to see them it's quite sad story and then he just said can I have a hug yeah and he looked quite down and so I gave him a

cuddle and I gave him a hug and I just wanted to just say like you know yeah just I hope everything turned out okay and I hope everything's alright because when you meet someone and it was I was a bit under the weather myself but he was like I could see that I just hope that everything was alright he was very worried and I could see that he was he was feeling quite down and yeah it was it was quite I sort of yeah you know he just sort of as he walked off I just sort of wish I'd probably had more of a chat but like he was just um yeah I gave him the colour and then he just

walked off and he was quite a sweet sweet guy and I just hope that uh the person he was going to see I don't want to talk too much just because like you know but I just hope that everything was all right. Well hopefully this will make you feel a bit better Hi guys. I met Tom and James briefly at the airport on Friday I just wanted to say thanks for saying hello I've loved all of your stuff from the Morgana show to success will Gary and the curse and of course the institution is the podcast today with you in a split second when I saw you I thought I'll just sweep past drop a Clooney s K man. I love your work Maybe a cheeky wink and we'll both be on our way.

Well that plan went into shit didn't it? I came banding over uninvited, panting like a nervously excited Labrador, making a beeline for a cat on the wrong side of a motorway. Then chewed you right off what was probably felt like a longer than the three minutes or so it was. I'd been on a flight back from Sydney via the States, which turned out to be a 40 hour journey, and you guys were the last people I expected to see. I'm sorry if it was a bit weird, but honestly, it made my day.

I think I said the reason for the trip is to see my dad. What I didn't mention is that he's terminally ill with a few days left. I managed to get there and make contact. While it's going to get harder over the next couple of weeks, saying hello to you lads was a really nice surprise. It made my day after a bloody long journey. I know I was probably not making much sense and sorry for forcing a hug on you, Tom.

It really was an absolute pleasure that I won't forget. Thanks again so much. Keep on doing you. Well, I felt quite emotional. Yeah. I didn't want to say it, but yeah, it's dad because I didn't realize, I didn't want to, yeah. But he was, he was a very sweet guy.

And so it's, yeah, fair thing, man. He's a nice, yeah. And actually, you know what? I needed some of that as well because I was coming off the back of that and it was a very sweet guy and so it's yeah fair thing he's a nice and actually you know what I needed some of that as well because I was coming off the back of that and it was a very sweet moment so you know what I read the email we were gonna do that email as part like if we got to him as much you sometimes do sometimes don't and then as soon as you said I thought I know exactly who's talking about Listen, I know JT always edits this out because he's worried that we're not gonna do it We have to do we have to do a bonus like have to do a bonus

Yeah, I know you so I'm committing I say JT leave this in the edit So Tom and I are doing we are doing it has been email bonus because I'm worried that we're sleeping on the emails a bit Yeah, we are and I actually spent a long time going through the emails last night because Lisa was a bit hectic. So There's like theme tune emails. Anybody's got theme tune ones, you can get them into us in the next day or so that you've got a chance of getting them on the pod because we're going to do theme tunes and we're going to do film pictures. We've got loads of both. So why am I going to this level? But anyway, Tommy Day, can you do the two? Yo, friends, people.

What is friendship? It's a weird thing, friendship. See, the other day, me and my wife brought some flowers for our house and the flowers were beautiful. Blooming and galleon and they smelled delicious. After a few days away, however, we came back to the house and as we opened the front door, we're like, oh, what's that horrible smell?

Something stinks. As we walked through the house, we realized it was the flowers. They'd gone past itself by day, and the moment of them blooming and feeling incredible had gone. And they were now quite brown and disgusting and their leaves had fallen off and it got me thinking flowers vegetables fruits can be a

little bit like a friendship you don't tend the garden if you don't look towards it they can quite quickly just turn and they can go a little bit stale and then they go past the point where you can ever save them the truth of the matter is to keep something going, flowers and such, you've probably got to dry them out and then they've got a far longer lifespan. Papery and such, let's not get back there. And that's like friendship.

Sometimes you've got to see it bloom like a flower, enjoy the moments it sits in the sun, and it shines brighter than ever. And then you've got to go, wow, I want this thing to last for eternity. I'm going to dry this shit out. I'm going to put it in a bowl and it will be there forever and ever more.

And that's what I'm saying about life, people. Find the flowers in your life that you want to keep. Dry them in an airing cupboard and keep them around forever. Because they're the flowers that when you need them most you can sniff, smell, and remember, life is all about good flowers, people, fruits, vegetables, and such.

Love you, man. Keep doing you. What a lovely vegetation-based final thought that was. Thank you so much. I was probably saying about a compost heap in there, but I lost my train of thought. Yeah, yeah, I mean, let's not get back into it, but really good I've been getting into of old-school sound in soul and stuff

So there's a great song called see gets hot by Durant Jones in the indications JT, could you give us a bit of that? Thank you once again for all your support regards the marathon and the radio show and everything Thank you so much to you Tom Davis for getting in touch with Flo. It was so sweet, you didn't know I'd find out about it but she told me that you were checking in on me the whole way around. You're a wonderful, wonderful person. Love you guys, take care of yourselves. Peace. Peace, one love. Bye. If you have a problem, opinion, feedback or anything at all, please email us at wolfalpod.gmail.com. That's wolfalpod.gmail.com. We'd love to hear from you, mainly because we don't have any content ideas. Thank you.