Wolf and Owl - S3 Ep 46: Grey Beards & Cool Dads

Episode Date: August 21, 2024

We’re talking… what to do about a greying beard, Snapchat filters, a big follow-up on last week’s breakdance debacle, the release of Tom’s Underdog tour special, a third instalment of the Tom ...Packman story and a cherished Nandos black card, lads-holidays, being a cool dad, first girlfriends and boyfriends, the Swan’s life-long dream to become a professional breakdancer, hanging out with Prince William and Rom’s lovely black nail varnish. Plus, a very exciting announcement about our first Wolf & Owl football team sponsorship and the kicking-off of our new season's FPL league. Underdog premieres on Sky Comedy tonight at 9pm (20/08/24). For questions or comments, please email us at wolfowlpod@gmail.com - we’d love to hear from you. Instagram - @wolfowlpod TikTok - @wolfowlpodcast YouTube - www.youtube.com/WolfandOwlPodcast Merch & Mailing List - https://wolfandowlpod.com A Shiny Ranga Production For sales and sponsorship enquiries: HELLO@KEEPITLIGHTMEDIA.COM Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Starting point is 00:00:00 This episode is brought to you by Vitamin Water. So much of what the world is obsessed with starts out in New York City. It's a place full of style and character that has something for everyone. With a range of flavors to meet any kind of taste, it's no wonder Vitamin Water was born there. Colorful, flavorful, anything but boring, Vitamin Water injects a daily dose of vibrancy into a watered-down life. Grab a Vitamin water today. Then podcast the body parts, get severed and served Bring your weak shit, wear the wolf and owler That ain't just a mistake, that's an awful howler Both of them are known to pull up at your shows
Starting point is 00:00:49 Have the crowd witnessing the murder Like they rode in with a gang of crows Fuck their censorship, let em see the whole thing They stay dressed to kill, never sheep's clothing Dark enough to turn the sun to the moon You'll see nothing, all you hear's a huff and puff and a... Expect killings, red spilling and flesh ripping impressive in it the death bringing his head spinning Just kidding every word in this songs about two grown men dressed up as a bird and a dog
Starting point is 00:01:15 Okay and welcome Thank you so much for joining us once again. It's the wolf for now. I'm still on holiday I'm trying to do that. I'm just trying to bring the holiday kind of the way that you're bringing the holiday vibe to all of us people on the holiday. It's very cool. But you your beard even looks like holiday like it's on holiday and it's chillin. I'm really seriously I've trimmed it and it's shown a lot more gray and it's starting to concern. What do we do about that? Because when you said yeah I know I know, does that mean,
Starting point is 00:01:46 were you saying, yeah, I know? No, no, no, because once we get you, I'm in front of you, man. I'm in front of you, gray wise, I think. This is the most gray I've seen yours look. Yeah. I've had the same. I've had mine chopped out a bit. But it is, I've had two barless.
Starting point is 00:01:58 But you've died yours, haven't you? No, no, no, no, no, no, no. Don't you dare, because I know, Dinesh just told me that you have died yours before. Yeah, I have. Yeah. And now I don't, I did, I did. Well, I'd wrote about it in my, listen about it, I'm not gonna plug my book here,
Starting point is 00:02:12 but I mean, it's not a secret. I did try it. You've got the Dris pepper look though. The white pepper Dris look. No, it looks shit, man. I don't know. I mean, yeah, it's round the sides of yours. I didn't realize that.
Starting point is 00:02:23 Yeah, exactly. See, I've overtaken you. Yeah, but at the moment, yeah, it's random size of yours. I didn't realize that. Yeah, exactly. So I've overtaken you Yeah, but at the moment I've got a guy doing my beard who's so incredible. He is really good. He's delicious They're doing beards Maybe the worst starts with any episode we've ever done. But anyway, the point is I'm getting gray and then it's sorted out How much are you telling me? How much longer you got a holiday? Well back end of this week Lisa keeps telling me it looks better, but I don't believe her.
Starting point is 00:02:48 Lisa likes that old sort of like, sort of like authoritarian sort of like cheeky teacher, old sort of cool teacher look to you. I'm thinking about shaving it off completely. Well don't do that, do not do that. Well that gets rid of the grace, right? Your face can't handle that. What do you mean?
Starting point is 00:03:06 Either can mine. We look awful beardless. We've both done this to ourselves. I went onto Snapchat. I downloaded Snapchat specifically for this. Don't start Snapchatting now you're on holiday and become a Snapchat guy. No, I'm not sending any Snapchats,
Starting point is 00:03:21 but they've got filters on there. So I tried to see what you look like without a beard filter I wonder if I can find it actually I did take a photo do you think I think snapchat's got such a creepy connotation isn't it what you mean I don't know it's not it's not for us no no no yeah I think it's got a vibe to it I just don't quite what how close you holding your phone to your face? It's because these sunglasses are so goddamn dark. Why wear them then?
Starting point is 00:03:48 I can't see shit. You're trying to look cool. Like, genuinely, Rom, this is not giving you the look that you think it is. This look, where you're trying to be really cool, you now look like a nanny reading a menu in a really cool bistro. I know, it's these sunglasses are so dark,
Starting point is 00:04:04 hold on a sec. Oh my menu in a really cool bistro. I know it's these sunglasses. So dark. Hold on a sec. Oh I can't find it. Anyway, I did take a photo of me without a beard, but I can't find it Tom Can I just tell you what just happened there just and I'm gonna um, I Just want to make reference to it. Basically. We put a clip out last week from the cast right? There's you having a go at me. I'm gonna talk about this a bit more in detail, right? Okay, okay, okay, okay. Okay, but it's about me talking about breaking or breakdancing and you going into one of me, right?
Starting point is 00:04:33 Yeah, and that clip seems to have been quite popular. And then what's happened now, and I can tell what's going on with you, right? You've decided, like fucking Bevo trying to latch onto what was popular in the past, right? You've decided to get extra spike is miss our hammering me. It's so obvious Right. It's so fucking crystal clear What you do there
Starting point is 00:05:01 Was basically be vote choking down a roast potato going, you know the rules, seven out of 10, dinner. That's basically what just happened. You think I wouldn't notice? Right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right. Number one, I very much enjoy always giving you shit. Number two, if I was to fucking look at my phone, right, and go, oh, wrong, the other day I took a picture
Starting point is 00:05:23 of me skiing, let me see if I can find it yeah where is it it's here somewhere what would you do? I wouldn't say anything I'd be concerned about my friends eyesight and I'd let it go on the podcast and then after as I say Tim him look man Can we have a quick word because I think you're going blind then in that that's how I'd hand then you're a better man Do you know what I think is? Thirsty little bitch for likes I think you've been away for three weeks. You're too chilled You're fucking by the pool every day you're taking your foot off the fucking bender gas and now you're just like Chilling out too much. Don't you worry, I know that it's coming back to me. I'm enjoying the moment. I'm going to tell you
Starting point is 00:06:12 now, this is Christmas, I'm playing your arsehole team and you've got a lot of injuries and I'm going to fucking try and get three points whenever I can because I know you're going to come back and you're going to be a very strong side.. Yeah I don't really know, I don't really have to come back to that, maybe this holiday is getting to me. We've got to talk about a couple of things. First of all this breaker break dancing thing, right? Yeah. I have been hammered from both sides here following this. Okay. So last week I referred to break dancing as breaking. Can I say by the way, I've also been hammered for this. I've not got a waistcoat free. I've got people in the breaking world who are breakdancers
Starting point is 00:06:52 getting in touch saying that my lack of knowledge of any of this is actually quite offensive to a culture. And I now, so I'll take my part in the fact that, you know, I jumped in on you. I didn't realize breaking was the name for it. No What I've learned from that is one You know if I'm being attacked to be a little less kind of ready to fold which I did fold pathetically. All right Yeah, go all embarrassed
Starting point is 00:07:18 Secondly, what's happened is I've been attacked by both factions right first of all the factions that I described as sort of on the wolf side of this, which is you send out such a knob saying breaking and breakers and all that. And then I've been contacted by the breaking community saying, why didn't you stick to your guns? You're supposed to be a hip hop fan, pathetic. The way that you started saying break dancing.
Starting point is 00:07:40 So I've basically managed to upset both factions here. There's not good, it's not been a good, you know, obviously I'm on holiday so it has been great but in terms of me looking at my phone, not good at all. Why have you bothered looking at your phone? You should just be off it. Well I tell you what, the main reason I've been looking at my phone, to look for updates of, look I don't want to overstate this but I don't think it can be overstated, the release of one of the most important pieces of art that I think't want to overstate this, but I think it can be overstated. The release of one of the most important pieces of art that I think is going to come out this
Starting point is 00:08:10 year, nay, this decade. I am of course talking about Underdog. Yeah, thank you very much. Which is out tonight, 9pm, on Sky Max, is it? Sky Comedy. Sky Max is a dream. Sky Comedy. Sky Max is a dream. Sky Max is a dream. That's Sky Max is the big hitters.
Starting point is 00:08:28 I'm on Sky Comedy. Very, very proud to be on there. Now TV and such. And also, by the way, I want to say this now, I might get in trouble for it. You can just download, you can get month three on Now TV. There's loads of great content on there. Watch my stand-up specials.
Starting point is 00:08:43 Also, some great other stand-ups on car or Beckett Just really can be doing month free watch this and then after a month, you know I'm actually to pay you can't keep paying this those are great stuff on there So if you have watched sopranos blah blah blah, but now TV is awesome. Can I commend you? Also for the clearness of your pronunciation with all that corporate dick in your mouth. Well done man. You really did. I understood everything you were saying clearly. Really well done. Thank you. I was all out the side of my mouth. All out of like a cowboy telling a secret. You've got a little dribble coming down here.
Starting point is 00:09:18 Thank you very much. I'm very proud of the show. I'm very excited for it to be out. I'm for the world to see. Or not the world, it's only in the UK. I'm getting a lot of people asking if it's going to be shown anywhere else. Well, it probably will do. I imagine it will do at some point. Once the heat goes out from sort of this UK release. Can I jump on something right away?
Starting point is 00:09:39 And this has become an odyssey of this very seldom do we get something that goes week into week into week. But I'm going gonna have to open the Tom Packman vault again so Tom Packman it turns out is Been a very very big part of my life From afar right? So I saw leachy this week being and that's just not good nickname for So I saw leechy this week being and that's just not good nickname fruit
Starting point is 00:10:12 It's just going man, they sweet Andy, so I did this week good guy character the one show for us to listen support Nice to see him there. Um, you were great on the one show by the way. Well done. Thank you very much Thank you. Did you tune in to watch it from Crete? Well, first of all, I'm not in Crete. So thank you for paying attention Second of all, what were you trouble? Second one I didn't shoot and I just saw some clips. Okay Thank you very much. So thank you I mean, it looks great as well I miss you to tell you you did and I was very very touched by your message is very beautiful and softly and seductive of you
Starting point is 00:10:44 So me and the are chatting pre-show. So he was there, we got into the Pacman chat. Andy's been across this as nearly everyone for a while. Yeah, because Tom's been, sorry to interrupt, but Tom has been, Tom Pacman has been very upset by this. I know he sort of sent us a lighthearted message. Yeah, yeah, and I feel, and this- It's not been good.hearted message yeah yeah so I'm
Starting point is 00:11:05 gonna say now this is where the the town kids why's your voice why's your voice because because Grace is asleep upstairs yes no no no no no no I'm slightly will when you hear the nature of this story is that so Andy sort of says oh I doubt you remember the first time then you ever met and I was like no I'm afraid so I don't remember. Yeah, I thought just off the curb at the office. He said, no, no, you did Lester Comedy Festival about 12 years ago. And you did a gig for Nando's.
Starting point is 00:11:34 And I was like, yeah, yeah, I did. Yeah, I compared a gig. Another well-known comedian had pulled out. I was called in last minute. And he, Tom Packman had basically gone into Off The Curve and said, oh we should get Tom Davis to do it, I think he's really really good, he's a new comedian, whatever, Tom Packman booked me for this gig. Jesus Christ.
Starting point is 00:11:55 Through this gig I then get a black card from Nando's, right? Oh wow. I haven't got anyone anymore because I did about two or three other gigs for them and because of that black card I went in to Nando's about a month after this and met Katherine, my wife. Now if if I hadn't done that gig I certainly would never have got the black card, I wouldn't have had some other gigs that came my way. Certainly wouldn't have had the sort of, you know, the free, frivolous nature that I could just pop into a Nando's and grab some food at lunchtime. So Tom Patman not only had sent me on a route to do some lovely gigs for Nando's, they're incredible, shout out Nando's, lovely people to be involved with. Also he
Starting point is 00:12:43 allowed me, yeah, without him I don't think I would have met Catherine. Tom Patman is essentially from afar my guardian angel. He's like Clarence in Wonderful Life. If my life didn't have Tom Patman in it, I don't know what it would be right now. Would it be remiss of me to say that, you know, little G wouldn't be sleeping upstairs in your house if it wasn't for Tom Patman? No, little G wouldn't. I don't think I'd still be alive if it wasn't for Tom
Starting point is 00:13:06 Patman. Me and Catherine straightened out my act. I started taking my life a bit more seriously, started stopping the person. So Tom Patman, sort of out of the Nando's gig, he basically brought you to the attention of Off the Curb, the agency with which... Well, he'd been doing that subsequently because then I spoke to Danny from Off the the curb and Danny had said Tom Packman was the guy who was coming into the office quite a lot of the time saying we should have a look at this guy. Yeah so Tom would come in and said have a look at this guy. Yeah. Got you the Nando's gig, you got a Nando's black card. Now I imagine, I hope you don't mind me sort of embellishing,
Starting point is 00:13:40 I wasn't there at the time, but imagine the sight of you in a Nando's, putting your order in and then tucking into, I imagine what would be three, three and a half whole chickens. You're getting your payback on you for the breaking stuff now aren't you? I can't imagine that would be something. You're putting it strapped in your fucking to steel toe caps and you're going to work. I've given you this, I have it. Yeah, it would be something that a woman would look at and go, that's my future husband necessarily, the sight of you tucking into Nando's. Is it fair to say that Catherine, upon seeing you in Nando's, when she saw you sort of brandishing the black
Starting point is 00:14:15 card that you got directly as a result of Tom Packman, there's an argument that that might have been the thing that made me think this guy's got something about him. He's a big hitter. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So Tom Packman is responsible not only for bringing you to the attention of Off The Curve, who now look after your tours and the aforementioned special that we talked about was probably Dirt Dancer. He sorted that out. He sorted you out of the Nando's gigs. He sorted you out with a gig that you and I first gig together at as well. Let's not forget that. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:14:48 Led to you eventually getting married. Yeah. And little G, right? So all of that, where you are today, very much thanks to Tom Packman. But I think all of that mixed together, Tom Packman, fuck you, you're not getting a shout out yeah number one you're Tom Batman this is this is a very mad thing for me because Tom Pacman has been almost like a puppeteer in my life without me knowing
Starting point is 00:15:14 he's an incredible human being he's wanted nothing from me Tom Pacman yeah he I never met such a selfish thank god He has wanted nothing cuz he's got fucking nothing He can't even get out from you on your podcast. No, you know what now is yeah, but the showers not enough now I'm deliberating what I can do to for Tom Patman right now. You're talking about a guy who? quietly, he's basically Morgan Freeman in that film where Jim Carrey thinks he's Noah from the Ark right that is Tom Packman. He's just quietly in the background, just fucking helping out, doing what he can.
Starting point is 00:15:51 If ever, do you know what? If I ever saw Tom Packman, I think I'd cry. Well, up until we did this podcast, if you'd have seen Tom Packman, you'd have gone, who the fuck are you? But now, now you've had- But Rom, this is the thing about modern society is, right? We all, and I'm terrible for this, we're all looking for a slap on the back.
Starting point is 00:16:10 We're all looking for a handshake. We're all looking for a well done power. Oh mate, thanks for helping me out there. Cheers for changing the world. And my car, the M25 and my car broke down. We're all after thanks and gratitude apart from Tom Patman. Tom Patman needs none of that. Tom Patman is just quietly going through like a lone guns gunslinger going into a town full of fucking baddies and marauding cowboys and just taking them all out And just saying all right. I've got you. Oh, do you want anything? Do you want some mead?
Starting point is 00:16:35 Or do you want some a bag of beans? No, no, no, i'm cool man. I'm quietly just i'm here to help out Yeah, I think we're in danger of going the other way here Okay, a couple of weeks ago. You didn't even know who the fuck this guy was. And now all of a sudden he's a deliverer of bean bags. Yeah, at the moment I'm looking at Tom Patman and yeah, it's hard for me to think of, you know, as many people have had such an impact on my life from a far as well, you know, he's just there. Yeah, I feel like I could throw a ball up as high as I could in the air, turn away and walk away
Starting point is 00:17:08 and Tom Patton would catch that ball. I don't think he would now. I think he might have done in the past. Yeah. What do you think you're gonna do for him? I mean, I'm seeing him in January. Well, I need to do something. I need to do something.
Starting point is 00:17:20 And it's gotta be big, it can't be just a small. I think it's gotta be massive. Yeah. I'm thinking about getting like an air balloon to sort of do one of those big signs across New York City. Like Tom Packman on Thinking Of You. Yeah. TD, or something like that. I think, do you know what I think?
Starting point is 00:17:35 That combines both being incredibly difficult to organize and being fucking worthless. Which I think is absolutely classic. I was talking to someone about whether I help him out with a little studio that he can live in while his flat gets rebuilt. He's moved in somewhere else now. I've kept across it because he didn't do anywhere near as much for me as he has done for you, but still I wouldn't ever let that go on. Thank you.
Starting point is 00:18:06 And it's just, I might look and see what's really cool in New York, like clothing wise and then just sort of send him something really nice and hip. Do you know what? Do you know what? Do you know what? I think that's a great shot because I think someone living in New York would love to get a gift selected by somebody who's done a brief Google called cool shit in NYC. I bought him something off the back of that. No, you don't like it.
Starting point is 00:18:28 I hope you enjoy the t-shirt. I went to New York. My friend went to New York and all I got was his lousy t-shirt. No, what about like a big sort of like pimp's coat or something like that? That's a great idea. That is a great idea.
Starting point is 00:18:45 He'd love that. Yeah, what I know about him, he'd love that. It's really difficult to analyse what's going on with you because I know you're talking about something that has real emotion, but you're also trying to be quiet because of Grace. And I can't figure out your tone. Because stupidly, when we did the layout of our house, my office is right beneath Grace's bedroom. Right.
Starting point is 00:19:07 Which means when we're doing this sort of stuff, I've got to be very, very quiet. Which I now realise... Have you woken up in the past? Well, I've just woken up. I think where I've laughed at some of your rather sort of gregarious gags, I've woken her up again. I was having a look now.
Starting point is 00:19:23 I think Catherine's trying to settle her. I've woken her up again. I was having a look now. I think Catherine's trying to settle her. Yeah, I think she's not really enjoying these lunchtime naps, if I'm honest with you. Catherine? Catherine and Grace. I love a lunchtime nap, however.
Starting point is 00:19:38 Oh, I love a lunchtime nap, man. Have you been napping on holiday? Yeah, I have been doing a bit of napping, yeah. Although, I don't know if you have this, obviously little G's much younger. Our boys, well Theo accepted, our boys don't seem to think you being asleep is a problem for them to talk to you. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:19:55 So what I mean is I'll often be in the middle of a nap and then I'll just feel a poke in my forehead, open my eyes and one of the kids has stood over me because he wants something. They don't give a shit about getting you out of sleep. Can I just say by the way, Lisa put a bitcher of Theo on her Instagram. Yeah, he is so cool. Yeah, no, it's it's it's it's a tragic thing to be thirsty around your son. But that I mean, I've talked to him.
Starting point is 00:20:32 Yeah, it's it's got a vibe where I'm just I'm just desperate to be his mate. You know, he's going to break some hearts. I'm going to tell you that now. Yeah, we'll tell you that. Yeah, I'm slightly nervous. This might be the last holiday we have with him. He's 12, how does he? 15. Oh god yeah. Oh fuck yeah. Zantia's calling my friend. Yeah I mean I've told you they've already planned their first lads holiday. Wow
Starting point is 00:20:59 yeah he's gonna be like the kingpin of that as well. Do you know sadly what is really tragic is Theo's gonna go on holiday and one of his friends will be like, sort of like goofy virgin, sort of like struggles with girls and that friend is me or you. Yeah. And Theo won't be that kid. No, he'll be 18 and if the friend's anything like me, 35. Just going, I just...
Starting point is 00:21:25 I just don't know how to approach them. What, should I just ask a question that shows some interest in what they might be about? Is it okay if I brush your hair? Yeah. So good for me to finally be on a lads holiday. I thought it would be too late in my mid-30s, but here we are. Do you think he will...
Starting point is 00:21:54 So do you think what next year? No, 16, he'll be 17, 18 when he's first lads holiday. No, they're talking about 18. But basically what they've planned is the day after his 18th birthday, they're going to fly out. Because he's quite late on. Yeah, you know what, he'll probably want to go to Newquay, not next year, the year after. As a dip in his toe in the water. Do you reckon?
Starting point is 00:22:19 Yeah, that's the call more is the one that he'll do after his GCSEA levels, that's what they'll do. Yeah. I wonder, sometimes you read about, you know, like, tragic men, which I would describe myself as one. Yeah. I wonder, like, sometimes you read about, sort of, you know, like, sort of tragic men, which I would describe myself as one. Yeah. Sort of seeing their sons grow up and be jealous of the fact that, you know, they've got this whole, like, bit ahead of them, do you know what I mean? And, like, I'm going to see him sort of partying and just, you know, having the time of his life, and then I'm going to go, it'll go to me dad like was this is it weird seeing me go through what you went through and I'm going I never really had it like that see how I'm afraid. You know I was very much playing golden eye on my own. You don't think I
Starting point is 00:22:58 can't wait to see he's when he brings his first girlfriend home and you're sort of trying to be cool in front of her or boyfriend. Well actually they were they were talking about you'll love this by the way because I don't know if they've picked this up from you because they do look up to you and they love the fact that I'm friends with you by the way. Their respect for you is far higher than it is for me. Yeah, that's a surprise that literally I have three people who respect me more than you, that's nice to hear. Even if they're your sons, most people it's the other way around. I had some old cracker joke the other day where they
Starting point is 00:23:28 said, I'm doing a podcast with Ramesh. Are you giving him a leg up because he hasn't got enough going on? And I said, no. I said, yeah. And they were, they literally really forbidden went, yeah, to be fair, we all know it's the other way around. Jesus. I was like, okay, cool. That's nice. I'm not gonna unpack all of that now, but fuck them. Yeah. But they said to me, basically we're discussing,
Starting point is 00:23:52 and bearing in mind, right, their dad is a professional comedian. Yeah. Right? They're discussing about whether they would bring prospective partners back to the house because I'd be embarrassing. Wow. Wow.
Starting point is 00:24:08 Do you know what I mean? All three of them were saying this. No, the youngest one wasn't. The oldest two were. Yeah. They were discussing. I mean, it's not... Do you know what I mean?
Starting point is 00:24:20 I think you must be quite cool in front of the kids, like their friends and stuff. There's got to be a coolness to you, right? I don't think it's a bonus. And basically what I mean by that is, their mates sort of think it's cool, I guess, that their dad's a comedian. But they seem as their dad. So it doesn't matter how cool your dad is.
Starting point is 00:24:40 I'd love to know if Lenny Kravitz's kids always thought he was cool. He's like one of the coolest guy in the world. Yeah, right. So you sort of His kids are gonna think he's cool. What are they? Because that's a question I've got is and by the way I'm not putting myself in the same bracket, but my kids find me embarrassing Right, they don't think I'm cool. So it's not like they're proud of introducing me to people They don't think I'm cool. So it's not like they're proud of introducing me to people. But so their mates are sort of like, oh, your dad's Romesh the comedian.
Starting point is 00:25:09 And they sort of, it's almost to the point where they don't like it being mentioned. Yeah, but that's also because they're trying to make their own way in the world. They're trying to become little rascals in their own right. That's the thing that you've got to remember. Yeah. You know how some people really look up to their dads and they go if I got to be half the man
Starting point is 00:25:28 You are I'll be delighted my kids are looking at me going if I got to be double the man You are it'll still be a massive fucker Anyway, sorry, you're saying about Grace. No, Grace is at the time of the moment, she will point me out as being her dad. She's very nice. She'll walk up and go, that's my dad. Yeah, but she's two and a half. I know the other side of it's coming. Everyone I meet says when you've got daughters, daughters are very, you know, that she'll
Starting point is 00:26:01 get to like eight, nine, and then it will be like this own time. So you sort of enjoy these moments because how conservative do you think you're going to be about, um, about sort of grace going out and stuff like that? Have you allowed yourself to project forward to like when she's like 15, 16 and stuff like that, which starts, yeah, my big worry is I'll be 65 at that point. Or 60. Yeah. I'll be 60. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:26:27 Do you know what I mean? So that's one reason I kind of have to say, I wanna be in that sliced alone shape for that. So when they come around and go, you know, that's 60, come around and go, fuck, he's a big guy. Not like, oh my God. Yeah, you'll still be a unit, won't you?
Starting point is 00:26:39 Yeah, it's either that or I've got to literally hire some sort of like bodyguards or something that sort of, they go, oh oh god he's in the mafia. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. There's a terrible sort of... You know in Bad Boys where they greet the prospective, I'd love to come around to your house and be, hopefully I'll have been invited round by then, but I'd love to be the one that answers the door to a prospective boyfriend who just does a bit of nothing for it.
Starting point is 00:27:02 Like Will Smith. You think you could be the Will Smith to my Lawrence. Yeah. I just open the door, I just open the door and I go, who the fuck are you? Ooh. So what, you're here to see Grace?
Starting point is 00:27:14 My Grace, little G? Tom, you didn't tell me a piece of shit was coming to the door to take Grace out today. Do you know what I mean, something like that. What do you think? Do you think, like, I think as well, like, I want a sweet boy that she goes out with. Yeah, I hope she isn't like bad boys. That's the thing you got to worry about,
Starting point is 00:27:29 like a sort of like, you know, a cool kid. Then, you know, that's the worry that a boyfriend comes around who's cooler than you used to be. And he can sort of, he's gone, I've listened to all the old wolf and owls, you know, sounds like you're a right douchebag when you're a kid. No disrespect to you, but if you're ruling out any kids that are potentially cooler than you were as a kid, there's a good chance that Grace is going to die a virgin, mate. What sort of girls have you seen the boys being with, do you think? Or boys?
Starting point is 00:28:03 Girls or boys? Well, I don't know. It's difficult to, I mean, like, they've had girlfriends and I've met some of them, but it's very difficult to say at that age, isn't it, what they're actually like, do you know what I mean? And they also, they don't talk to you. You know what, they just come up and go, hello.
Starting point is 00:28:17 They go, yeah, hi, nice to meet you. That's it, you can't make an analysis. Do they ever say that on my mom and dad watch the weakest link or anything like that? No, they very, I very rarely have conversations with the boys' girlfriends. Is Lisa across that kind of vibe? Yeah, she is.
Starting point is 00:28:31 The boys talk to Lisa about that stuff more than they talk to me. So you're sort of like just on the outskirts of it, you're not sort of- Listen, I think they've heard enough. They don't need to listen to the podcast. They just sort of know the general demeanor I have. I'm not somebody that you go to with relationship advice.
Starting point is 00:28:45 Yeah, okay. That is not, if anything. What was Lisa like at school? Was she sort of like, boyfriend-wise? She was much better than I was. Like she was sort of had the normal kind of, the normal kind of upbringing, I guess. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:29:02 You know, she had boyfriends and she was normal. She's able to interact with them without them thinking she's a weirdo. And she also, from what I've heard of her, she sort of was very much her own person. She wasn't the sort of person who, and I hope I don't mind you banding you into this, what I would describe as I'll be whatever you want me to be type of partner. She wasn't quite as durable as myself and you maybe. No, no, not quite as malleable. Not quite as, what music do you like?
Starting point is 00:29:26 Me too. What's your favorite film? Me too. What, a coinkydink? Please don't walk away. What a coinkydink? Can I do you a mix tape? Well, first of all, tell me what songs you like
Starting point is 00:29:37 because I'd like it to be something you enjoy. What's a coinkydink? Is that a coincidence? Is this like a geeky way to say a coincidence. Oh my god, I'm obsessed with that. A cuinkadink. By the way, bro, we need to talk about, so, football-wise, football sponsor-wise,
Starting point is 00:29:59 we need to sort of shout out the fact that we are going to look at more clubs. We have invested our first bit of sponsorship money. Yeah, so basically we are going to do more than one club, we've decided, because we had so many requests in. So we're going to sort of do a few, aren't we? We haven't decided how many yet, but we're going through them at the moment and sort of figuring out. But we have agreed our first one. Our first sponsorship of an amazing team, shout and Bobby Watson, who runs this. Good guy. So it's Croygas Youth Panned Disability Team, or Teams. So it's a number of teams we've
Starting point is 00:30:33 sponsored, brought the kits for these kids. Basically it's kids between six and 16, basically making them more accessible for them to play football. So there's a whole range of disabilities, autism, cerebral palsy, Down syndrome, anxiety, asthma, epilepsy, Williams syndrome. So it's amazing the work these guys do. It's genuinely incredible the stuff they do. So that's our first team that we sponsored. Very, very proud to be a part of it. The first of a few. So please do not worry. That's not the end of our... No, this is our first ever into the world of football yeah uh the wolf and our will be a blazing on their kits which is exciting to see very exciting yeah um and also while we're talking about football so i was slightly distracted bringing this up
Starting point is 00:31:15 tec mom t e g m u m that's the code for our wolf and our fantasy premier league could i say by the way you um you were brilliant by the way you set set up the league and you've come out of the code, but you haven't shared it on your page. I'm sharing it on my page, no one wants to look at it. You've got a far bigger reach than me. So I'm getting a lot of people messaging me going, are you doing a league this year? And I'm like, yeah, it's on my main page,
Starting point is 00:31:38 it's on my grid. You put it on the grid? Yeah, because JT did it. Shout out to Royce for the way he did all the work on that. i'm hoping to see that you your team is going to be fired this year maybe how's it how's it looking uh is the sexy ballers back by the way has he should be done the sexy ballers is back but by the way so the other night we're at dinner yeah um just before the first game it's just before the deadline i was slightly distracted at dinner because i was because Theo informed me that half had half an hour left
Starting point is 00:32:05 to make any final kind of changes to my team. Yeah. We're then looking through the Wolf and Our League, which has got loads of teams. So thank you so much if you've signed up. And thank you if you haven't signed up. It's all about signing up to the Fanis Premier League. You're still a welcome member of the Animal Pack.
Starting point is 00:32:21 But somebody else has got a team based on the same idea as the swans sexy boys I think they're called. Oh wow. So it's a theory. I like the fact there's a few people objectifying these footballers. Yeah I think it's really nice that not only can one sort of middle-aged woman behave inappropriately but she can sort of start a trend so. A number of them can and we're enabling that behavior so that's cool isn't it? That's a cool thing. We sponsor the football team, feel good about that enabled a load of dodgy middle-aged women feel great about that as well. Is there anyone who's Lisa got in the team? Any sort of like, Hal Marries, any sort of differentials, any sort of players that you go, I don't think that'd be your thing?
Starting point is 00:33:06 No, no, not really. She's got Grealish in there, obviously. Of course she is, even though you weren't playing much this year. No, but that doesn't matter. That doesn't matter to her. I'd actually weirdly thought Matty Cash would probably be Leeds' type as well. I might have a word with her. She might transfer him in. I'll shout that out there. Get your eyes on this girl. Here we go, what do you think of this? He's nice looking isn't he?
Starting point is 00:33:28 Yeah, fancy a bit of this, do you want to transfer him? No, no, I'm not insecure at all. I'm showing you other men to say that I can't. Yeah, go on. One of my favourite bits of your stand-up ever is the bit about one of your sons, someone at school, said that your mum's having an affair with the Premier League footballer.
Starting point is 00:33:44 I genuinely thought it was one of his, It's a great bit of stand-up. Oh, thanks, bro. Thanks, Brad. Speaking of great bits of stand-up, 9pm tonight, Underdog on Sky Comedy makes you give it a spin. Lock it, load it, let us know your thoughts. What made you choose that? I quite, while we're talking about it, I quite like the photo you chose, by the way. I didn't choose that photo. I didn't. Yeah choose that photo. Yeah, it was a very good photo but I can't take credit for that. The girls in the office sort of went very much behind that.
Starting point is 00:34:12 They chose well. They chose really really well. They've got a good eye my friend. They've got a great eye. Yeah, they've got a great eye. Can we talk about Ray Gun please? By the way, the whole Ray Gun thing is insane, right? There's a lot to unpack here. Well, minutes after we finished recording the podcast, and apologies, because by the time the podcast came out, what we said about Ray Gun was kind of out of date. So Ray Gun is Rachel Gun, the Olympic breaker representing Australia. Yeah, I think we call her a breaker. And anyway, it turns out, and by the way,
Starting point is 00:34:46 this all allegedly, it's all allegedly that her and her husband set up a break dancing federation in Australia, set up one audition. This is what I'm basically, this is what I've gleaned from my internet research. From TikTok. Set up one audition.
Starting point is 00:35:04 Yeah. Which, I don't know if this bit is true, but there's sort of bits flying about that her husband was one of the judges or something. I don't know about that. Anyway, so one audition that was the only audition to decide who was going to represent Australia got through. Her husband was the coach for the Australian team. I think that's pretty think that's almost certainly true. Yeah, yeah, I think that's right. And essentially the allegations are that she put herself up so that she could go to the Olympics
Starting point is 00:35:32 at the expense of potentially more talented breakers that could have represented the country. Is that what you gleaned? Yeah, I mean, once sort of the podcast went out, there was that, and I got quite a few people mentioning May saying that she'd sort of she was being toasted as sort of Eddie the Eagle type character that was sort of that only lasted a short amount of time before it sort of came out that yeah, there was a sort of there was actually a group that a lot of people have been referencing can't remember their names terrible. I remember
Starting point is 00:36:01 Reagan obviously, because she did go to the Olympics, but there was a group that everyone's saying that should have got in, but didn't, which is pretty damning. I mean, again, it's that TikTok thing, and this is the other side of TikTok, is that what I've noticed is there's a raft of people who just go, right, this is the actual news, but I'm gonna add a little something, I'd be terrible if I was at that age now,
Starting point is 00:36:23 because I'd be doing that. Let me add some sass to this story. You know, so it would be like, it would be exactly what you said, which sounds like the truth, then it would be like, Ray Gunn and her husband, like let down all the tires on these people's cars
Starting point is 00:36:37 so they couldn't make the audition. And then someone else goes, oh, I heard they petrol-bond the cars, and it just seems to spiral out of control, the stories. But either way, it seems that Ray Gunn isn't the hero. No, we wanted no we needed That is not a hero at all But look what all I would say you see me is try to recreate the dance and actually did it better when she did It in when she got back home. Yeah, I did say that
Starting point is 00:37:01 And look all I would say is you know if you are going to the new, like direct news sources to get your news, why do that when you can come to this podcast and hear stuff like a week after everyone else has been talking about it, with also an added lack of understanding from both of us. So there you go. You're welcome. If Lisa turns you now, Lisa, if Lisa turns you now and said to you, if Lisa turns you now and said, I've always dreamt of going to the Olympics and being like doing dressage or I don't know, like BMXing, how would you get a job as a BMX coach? Like do everything you could to get
Starting point is 00:37:37 onto the Olympic coaching team to then sort of fraudulently get an exam? Because I think, although that is like horrible what's happened. It's also quite a nice source Yeah, it's actually quite romantic what they've done. He's like no no no you you wouldn't do that No, because you're putting you're putting Your look don't get me wrong. I want the best for laser. Okay, what if Lisa turn around with Romesh? I'm gonna break up with you if you don't become the head coach of the dressage team. Well I'd say listen let's just hope the settlement's okay. You wouldn't go let me see what I could do Leif, please! No but if Leif said, say for example Leif said I want to become a break dancer.
Starting point is 00:38:16 Right yeah, Leif's got a way of being, I can imagine Leif's a break dancer. Yeah but say I would decide, I didn't like the blasé way which she threw that out by the way. No, I just looked out the window because my neighbour walked past. No, but you went like this, oh yeah she could be a break, she's got some rhythm. It's horrible. No, she has got rhythm. No. I didn't want to be told, she's got rhythm. How do you know, what are you basing that on, that she's got rhythm? Number one, she used to be a drama teacher, right? So she definitely she's figured out she'd be doing drama and dance, right?
Starting point is 00:38:50 The way she carries herself is distinguished and she carries herself in a very like I'd say that Lisa when she comes into a room almost floats into her room. She's stomping like you do Right, so I'd say that she's got a very sort of like yeah, she's got a nice way about it It wouldn't shock me if I was out and I was you and Lisa somewhere and Lisa was dancing and she could dance. I'd go, yeah, that's what I thought. So based on the fact that Lisa used to be a drama teacher and when she walks into a room she's got some sort of grace, you think she could bust out a head spin? Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa,
Starting point is 00:39:24 whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa,
Starting point is 00:39:32 whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa the genre that you adore and love. Yeah, without a doubt. I think fucking hell, she could go some. OK, let's do this. So you're Lisa. Yeah, OK. All right. I'm me. And you've decided that you're like Ray Gunn,
Starting point is 00:40:04 you want to try and become an Olympic breaker, okay? Okay. And action. Hi, you okay? How's your day at work? Yeah, it's fine thanks. It's just, well I did the podcast in the morning. Yeah. fine thanks it's just well I did the podcast in the morning yeah Tom is doing his usual thing of sort of trying to go in two-foot on me because he thinks that's what gets traction online and then it does seem to have done well
Starting point is 00:40:33 in the last clip you put out it seems to have got people's attention well I'm surprised that you'd know Barry don't want to spend so much time listening to the parents in hell people don't even know that you two do a podcast because neither of you ever talked about it in any of the press that you do. Oh, actually, sorry, can we just break character for a minute? Did you mention it on the One Show? Yeah. No, no, Romy Kemp actually mentioned it without me saying. Romy Kemp brought it up. He's a keen listener.
Starting point is 00:40:55 Okay. Romy Kemp said about it on the One Show, I thought it was really, really cool that he said, I forgot that you knew him. Yeah, yeah, nice. Yeah, he's a nice guy, isn say I forgot that you knew him. Yeah Yeah, he's a nice guy's name Yeah, he seems like something seems to be something you seem to have something on your mind darling What's I'm just sitting here just thinking you know Theo's getting older. He's got a new girlfriend He's already panicked 18th You know Charlie's obviously you know dreams have been a foot blow and Alex's dreams of the stage and further afield.
Starting point is 00:41:26 I'm just thinking, what am I gonna do? What's my next steps in life? I know that you just think I don't need any more steps because you like it the way it is with coming home and me being here to cook your dinners and such. Well, I love you, darling. I know you do. By the way, you've got some spinach in your teeth.
Starting point is 00:41:48 You said you like that, you thought it was cute. But no, I've got a dream Ramesh that I never talked to you about. I never had any, I thought that you'd just pour scorn on it in one of your cocky sort of cheeky ways that you do and I love that about you, but this is more than a dream. I want to be a break dancer, Ramesh. Do you? Yeah, I want to be a break dancer. I want to break. I want to be able to just go out there and roll on my head and just flip to my side and just let my body take control.
Starting point is 00:42:17 That's all I can dream of. It's all I think of when I lay in bed at night. Can I ask you just a question, darling, and I believe whatever you say to me. Yeah. Has this idea been put in your head after that that party we went to that Tom was out and he said that he came up to you really creepily and said that you look like you've got a lot of rhythm and he said he had pickled onion breath
Starting point is 00:42:36 yeah Tom had eaten a whole jar of pickled onions that night and I don't think that a disillusioned him the fact of the matter is the truth is I need to let my body do the talking I'm sick of just sitting around this is someone like you Lisa I'm sick of just sitting around here hanging on your coat tails so I need you to do me a favour with your context with the royal family is there any way that you could speak to Prince William and see if he can let you be the head coach of the Great Britain breakdance team so I could get on it? Darling, I hope you don't mind me saying that your approach to this very much demonstrates a sort of blunt lack of intelligence of Tom Davis. No, but you have so many contacts in the world. Why do you think Prince William is going to let me become the head coach of the Great
Starting point is 00:43:35 Bunch breakdancing team? Because he's a leader of the country. He's a leader of the free world. If you ask him, he owes you... Sorry, Lisa, can I just ask it? And I love you, and obviously it doesn't change my judgement of you. Are you of the belief that Prince William is the leader of the free world? Yes! Prince William is as powerful a man as there is, and he's one of your friends. You went to a barbecue at his house to watch the Arsenal Cup final. We all remember that. You were there with Tony Adams.
Starting point is 00:44:02 And even Tony Adams might know someone in the Great British Breakdancing. My point is this, I do so many different things for you. I'm there for you when you cry. I'm there to pick you up when you fall down. I need you to do one thing for me in return. Get to be the head coach of the British or Great British Break Your Steam and I want to be on it. Would you do that for me my darling? Listen, I am happy if you talk to somebody about this, be it me getting you into touch with Prince William or you know maybe just a dance teacher in the first instance if you've got anything about you maybe that should be our first step. Yeah but this is the thing I haven't got time to learn how to dance. I need to get out of this. You've got four years. Yeah but four years will fly by. I need to know that I've got something to aim towards otherwise I'll just text Rob Beckett and see if he can do it for me.
Starting point is 00:44:55 He knows people as well. Okay Lisa, first of all Tom what I would say to you is up until this point I don't think it was a very convincing laser impression but throwing Rob Beckett in my face now I feel like you might be living in our house. Anyway, end scene. That was great. That was I think with that highlighted a lot of stuff. Yeah. The point is, in all seriousness, no I wouldn't. Really? Well, I mean, I know you've been silly, but I'm not going to, first of all, I definitely wouldn't try and get in touch with Prince William to ask him to work with the head coach. But also, in reality- How would you know Prince William? Do you know Prince William well enough that you could just, or like, text one of his aides
Starting point is 00:45:38 or- No. That's a mad thing. I always think that when I watched games of football, you watched a game of football with him. It was insane. I was thinking that when I watched that games of football that you watched a game of football with him Oh It was insane. It was weird. It was what was weird is it was it? Very quickly. You're just chatting to a bloke Yeah, he's just chatting about the foot. We just sort of chat him out the football. It's a bit weird. It's sort of weird
Starting point is 00:45:59 Yeah, I think actually Tony Adams is a more rogue sort of choice for him because Tony's quite a big character, isn't he? He's a very big character. it's got a lovely guy. Yeah Into this trap of slugging off Tony I'm just saying that the two of you if I was gonna fight either of you around my house at the moment Prince Williams Definitely you and Tony Adams and sort of I Be like, yeah, I think you'll be I think Tony's I think Tony's of guy could come in and make a joke about your house. Yeah. And then you'd sort of spend the rest of the time.
Starting point is 00:46:29 I think Tony's got that bawdy sort of humour. I like that about him. I think he's a cool guy. He's got a fight. Great captain. Listed loads of trophies for you. But he's got a nice handshake, right? Lovely handshake.
Starting point is 00:46:40 And just a lovely bloke. Lovely bloke. Have you ever heard from him again afterwards? Yeah, we've text every now and again. Wow. Well, we did for a bit after that. We don't know. Let me just have a look at it. It's so funny.
Starting point is 00:46:55 Can I tell you genuinely what it is, right? But, OK, I've got sunglasses on. The reason I've got sunglasses on is to show this is a holiday episode, right? Yeah. I just thought it'd be a funny little prop. But also I've got a privacy screen on my phone. Yeah, your brother's got one of them. Can you see that?
Starting point is 00:47:10 Yeah, yeah, your brother's got one of them. So it's sort of double dark. Your brother's got one of them and you can't see a thing on it when you're sitting next to him. He starts showing you stuff on his phone, you can't see a thing. He, by the way, is, do you know he's now a a viral, like he's become a proper viral star now, your brother. Mmm I know, it's exciting. He's like, yeah he's really exciting but I'm getting a lot of people message me saying oh does Dinesh get a mention on your special? I was like well no, he warmed it up, he was brilliant at doing that. I haven't got any material
Starting point is 00:47:42 about him. Do I get a mention in your special? I don't think you made the cut of the special. There was a joke about you, but I didn't make it into the. Okay. Well, it was the trouble, the joke was linked to one of your, it was a joke about one of your friends, and then it linked in, sort of, and yeah. You know, you know,
Starting point is 00:48:01 you know, do you remember when I did three shows at the Horth, and you opened for me? Yeah. Yeah, yeah. And do you remember like I did three shows at the Horth and you opened for me? Yeah. And do you remember like you feeling really nervous and I sat down with you and I said to you look man, you're like one of the most naturally funny people I know. You need to get back into stand-up and I think great things will happen. And then you went on this tour, amazing tour, you've now got a special. I guess that I'm in a roundabout way of what I'm saying is I find myself having a lot in common with Tom Packman no no no no listen we are both people can I just say but look I've overly stated quite how amazing you've been in my my
Starting point is 00:48:43 comeback to this game I will say this so wrong you'd have absolutely number one you'd have ripped me it to shreds if I at the end of every tour show Gone look ladies gentlemen, thank you so much for coming by the way I won't be here tonight if it wasn't for one man and one man only one miss recognize was it you just Slaughtered me you saw me when I thought your brother back on stage for a standing, like, crawling, cause I was like, it was an incredible crowd. I wanted your brother, cause it was his hometown. You went, why did he get back on stage?
Starting point is 00:49:13 I didn't say it like that. I didn't say it like, come on, man. Look, I know you wouldn't do anything like that. You're not the sort of guy to go to fucking throw his top into the crowd or whatever. You know, that kind of twat. Oh, I am. I am, my friend not that kind of twat. Oh I am, I am my friend that's all.
Starting point is 00:49:30 We've got to wrap up very shortly but I just want to ask you your opinion on something. Go on. Because you've not commented on it but I don't know if you noticed it. Do you know that last week when we did the podcast that I had black nail varnish on? I didn't notice it but I didn't say anything, I just thought it was you playing around with the kids and I thought actually it's a very sweet sign of holiday you. Well, I just decided to get my nails done in black, right? And just-
Starting point is 00:49:50 Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. What? Well, I just went to get my nails done and then- Did you have them done? That wasn't like Charlie playing around with a marker. No, that was genuinely my look that I was rocking for the last, I don't know, I've had it taken off now.
Starting point is 00:50:03 So basically you saw Youngblood at the Eminem Snoop Dogg thing and since then you've basically tried to morph into Young Blood. Like Tommy Lee. I know and then Lisa posted a photo of me on holiday with her. Can I say Lisa's really up to her Instagram game out of this? Right because the boys have said to her she's got to start posting some photos. Yeah, it's nice. Anyway, in one of the photos, I've got my fingers like this. And you can see the nail file. I got a lot of shit.
Starting point is 00:50:32 What, from friends, family, and such? And members of the public. How many members of the public are following Lisa? Not that many, but somebody, in fact, somebody specifically said, can't wait for Tom D to go in too fit on you for this. Yeah, but I actually thought it was quite, I genuinely thought it was Charlie probably
Starting point is 00:50:49 painting in your nails and- No, it's my new look. Is Lisa looking at becoming a sort of Grammy then? She sort of like looking at- No, fuck no. In fact, if anything, every day she starts looking at photos going, why the fuck did I agree to do this? Sometimes you're posting without a caption.
Starting point is 00:51:10 She's very, she's not very social. I quite like that. I quite like that about her. I quite like the fact that she's not into it in the slightest. Anyway, what I was thinking, we could, you and I could go for like a matching manicure or something. By the way, I love a pedicure. My toes are disgusting. What are we? Like why don't we both fight for the Christmas show just get like wolf and yeah I like to get matching tell you somewhere as well. I'd be cool. Okay, it feels like more of a commitment, but okay What do you get why don't we get wolf and owl on each of our butt cheeks that would be pretty good
Starting point is 00:51:41 I'm genuinely I want a new towel to tattoos, but I don't know what to do. I can't think of what I want. How can you know that you want two tattoos, but not know what you want? Because I keep on, I'm really like indecisive when it comes to stuff like this. Okay. I want one of my cut off and I want one on my shoulder.
Starting point is 00:51:58 Oh, right, so you know the locations, but not where. I know the locations, I keep on changing up what I want. I keep thinking of Jarrah Bowen when he scored the winning goal and he's on his knees for West Ham. Somewhere on me. Okay, listen, I don't know if JT's going to edit all this out, but basically every what, seven minutes my internet is just cutting out. I think it's been every seven minutes.
Starting point is 00:52:22 I'd say between your internet cutting out and the fact that I'm speaking in whispers I'd say that this is probably more a more sedate episode I think in by the way to the gentleman who stopped me in the street today and asked about a bonus I'm very sorry for everyone. We did do a bonus this week felt promises on holiday We couldn't kind of make Darie's a line But I think we owe everyone a bonus after this rather quiet, sort of almost quite sedate episode. I think so, I think so. Also, while we're wrapping up, can I,
Starting point is 00:52:49 well first of all, I need some advice on what to do about my beard. Okay, there are three options. One, just accept it's going grey. I quite like the greyness. Two, shave it off completely. Don't, don't do that. Three, dye it completely black.
Starting point is 00:53:04 Can I just say this, whenever I think about you shaved, this is you shaved. So hopefully this comes up. So that's you shaved, right? That's you there shaved. Oh God. Okay. So I don't think that's so yeah, so I think when we look at that right that is yeah Are we are we gonna go that as a look for you? Just a matter of getting used to it Initially why not but then after all boobies guy that's you've got hair So for you, it's you've got more avenues than I've got I've got no hair. So it's very difficult for me. I Look like a snooker. Oh, It's yeah, but I see you were distinguished. I think you should say what would dr. Dre do he said it was clean shaven. Yeah
Starting point is 00:53:57 Right Tomo, okay, can you do us the honor of taking us out? Market pair of shoes. His favourite shoes in the world. He wore them out every day wherever he'd go. Say for example, if he had to take the bins out, he'd sit these shoes on, they were comfort. There was an air of relaxation in their comfort. Then he'd go to work and he'd wear the same shoes. And if he was going to go to a nightclub, nay, a restaurant for a meal of the evening, he'd wear the same shoes and if he was going to go to a nightclub or a restaurant for a meal of the evening he'd wear the same shoes. So much so that people started joshing
Starting point is 00:54:28 and taking a mick out of Mark about his shoes. If you noticed Mark he always wears the same shoes. Mark's always in the same shoes. All of a sudden Mark started staring at the shoes in a new way. His shoes had brought him so much scorn and so much ridicule he didn't enjoy them quite as much as he used to. So one day Mark took them off and put them in a cupboard with the intention of never putting them on again. Brought himself some new shoes. He brought some slippers or sliders to take the bins out and do direct jobs around the house. A pair of shoes that he could wear to work and a pair of smart shoes so if he'd ever go to the restaurant, or even if he'd go to a nightclub. Three different pairs of shoes but none of them felt the same as his old pair and people would turn around to him and say, yo Mark, nice shoes,
Starting point is 00:55:18 cool shoes Mark, hey Mark you going out tonight? They're some sick shoes. Although their words felt nice for a little while, quite a lot of the time that she didn't mean a thing because all mark could think of is quite comfortable his old shoes were and every now and again he bought parts of company which they sat they think about opening it putting them on but then they think about the ridicule things that people say anyway fast forward a couple of months and Mark's new shoes and started giving blisters. As he was running out to take the bins out, lately, to try and get to the bin man in time, his sliders had slipped off his feet and he'd fallen over
Starting point is 00:55:56 and scratched his knee quite bad and all the bin men laughed at him. At work one day he was chatting to someone and his foot popped through the bottom of his new work shoes. They weren't quite the quality he had dreamed that they'd be. And his nighttime shoes that he went to nightclubs and restaurants in had started to give him blisters. These new shoes were nothing like his old shoes. So one day he opened up his cupboard and put on his
Starting point is 00:56:25 old shoes. He started walking down the street with them. They felt good. He started smiling and someone said, hey Mark, I haven't seen you smile for ages. Mark, what's going on man? You look cool. You look chilled, Mark. You look relaxed. Truth is this, right, those old shoes, well, that's what the story could be about. The story's about this. Mark's comfortable in his shoes, he was happy in his shoes. And that in itself is like a lot of things. If you're happy, you're chilled in your surroundings
Starting point is 00:56:55 and who you are, that's important. But sometimes if you let other people in, let them come out to judgement, let them make you go against the grain, it changes a little bit who you are. If you're happy in your shoes, stick in your shoes and don't let anybody tell you you need a new pair. Cheers guys. Okay, that was great. Thank you so much.
Starting point is 00:57:23 Post Malone has made a country album top. Oh this is sick. No no no no no I'm very much on this. This is amazing. So JT could you play us featuring Tim McGraw, Wrong Ones by Post Malone. The whole album's pretty good if you like that country vibe. Post Malone's good at a catchy number. Thank you guys, take care, see you next time. Much love. Bless bless bless. Bye. Thank you guys, take care, see you next time, much love. Bless bless bless. Bye! If If you have a problem, opinion, feedback or anything at all, please email us at wolfalpod.gmail.com. That's wolfalpod.gmail.com. We'd love to hear from you, mainly because we don't have any
Starting point is 00:58:41 content ideas. Thank you.

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