Wolf and Owl - S3 Ep 8: Rainforests & Confusing Carbs

Episode Date: February 7, 2024

We’re talking… the Rainforest Cafe, questions for zoologists, existential bears, unfortunate infections, pumpkin carving, nightclub hassles, 90’s fashion, confusing TikTok carbs info , sleazy salesmen, stepping up the social media and awkward silences. Plus, an email question about celebrity sleepovers. For questions or comments, please email us at [e-mail] - we’d love to hear from you. Instagram - @wolfowlpod TikTok - @wolfowlpodcast YouTube - www.youtube.com/WolfandOwlPodcast Merch & Mailing List - https://wolfandowlpod.com/ A Shiny Ranga Production For sales and sponsorship enquiries: [e-mail] Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

See yourself buying a home one day? Do future you a favor. Open a Questrade First Home Savings Account and help that future come faster. The FHSA is a tax-free account where all your investment gains are yours to keep and put towards your first home. With Questrade, you can open an FHSA online. No bank appointment needed. It's easy and only takes a few minutes. The sooner you get started, the more time your down payment has to grow. Open an account today at questrade.com. What's better than getting a small premium roast coffee and your favorite McMuffin? Getting a small premium roast coffee and your favorite McMuffin for only $4 plus tax for a limited time only at McDonald's. Exclude Egg BLT McMuffin at participating McDonald's in Canada. Prices exclude delivery. That ain't just a mistake, that's an awful howler Both of them are known to pull up at your shows

Have the crowd witnessing a murder like they rolled in with a gang of crows Fuck the censorship, let em see the whole thing They stay dressed to kill, never sheep's clothing Dark enough to turn the sun to the moon, you'll see nothing All you hear is a huff, a puff and a Expect killings, red spilling and flesh ripping Impressive innit, the death bringing, it's head spinning Just kidding, every word in this song's about two grown men dressed up as a bird and a dog.

Pow! Oh no, I didn't have anything to follow up with. Welcome to the Wolf of the Owl podcast. That was like, you know, like going up to someone in a, back in the day and trying to sort of chat someone up and walk over and sort of think you've got a real cool opener and you're about to sort of like blow their mind and then literally

just sort of be like I don't see you in I just got reminded of like a horrible incident where I was like do you know Rainforest Cafe? Oh my god yeah

it used to be in London I think it still is in London isn't it but is it not there anymore is it closed down? Is it not closed I think it's closed down because I think it had dysentery in it or something I think it still is in London isn't it but is it not there anymore is it closed down is it not closed I think it's closed down because I think

it had dysentery in it or something I think like the water all got like contaminated and all the robots there stopped working

okay it's difficult to know how much of what you're saying is factually correct but no no it's true because remember when it first opened

it was like fucking mind blowing it was actually like being in a forest wasn't it like you bowled in like the line. Because remember when it first opened, it was like fucking mind-blowing. It was actually like being in a forest, wasn't it? Like you bowled in, like the lion would go, and all that and stuff, and it felt like really,

oh, wow, this is probably the highest edginess. That's very much not like being in a forest. There are no fucking lions in the rainforest. Well, no, there was, yeah. Yeah, but if you didn't know, you're probably a little bit like, you've travelled the world, so you know about forests and rainforests

and shit, right? Like, for people like me, I literally haven't been any further than Kos or fucking Feneraki. I go, like, if you told me, if I went to a rainforest and someone went, there's no lions here, I'd go, well, it's a fucking waste of time. You don't want to go to a forest and there be lions. Do you know that Lion King was going to be called King of the Jungle,

but then they realised that there are no lions in the jungle. Really? That's why they called it Lion King. Yeah. Is called King of the Jungle, but then they realised that there are no lions in the jungle. Really? That's why they called it Lion King, yeah. Is that true? Yeah, that is true, yeah. I mean, you're acting like it's the most unbelievable thing I've ever said to you. But in the Lion King, he does go and hang out in the jungle for a bit, doesn't he? Is it the jungle that you go?

Yeah, I think he does, yeah, but I don't think they normally knock about there, do they? Is that the jungle he goes to? It's strange, isn't it? I don't know. So what, they just hang out in the plains? Every time I think I'm certain of something, you ask me a question, I think, oh, no. It's like you need to talk to your kids,

and they go, so why is that? And you go, hmm, I don't actually know. In my mind, I thought lions just had loads of little, when it was really hot, they hung out in the jungle just to get a bit of shade. No, I mean, listen, I'd love to hear from a zoologist on this, but I think of shade no i mean listen i'd love to i'd love to hear from a zoologist on this but i think tigers you know what i'd love to actually i've got so many fucking questions about animals and stuff and habitats and shit like that and i know i take a

lot from you because you probably the most traveled person i know in my life but it would be really interesting to get a zoologist on here just to sort of throw the load of questions out it would be good i'll probably write like a hundred questions okay let's let's let's do it let's do it okay well let's not do a hundred questions okay but let's go yeah but some of them will be quite small i think they'll be like oh uh the bees surviving like the arctic like so okay well listen if there's any zoologists here or or anyone else anyone that sort of is able to breathe and read can you answer the question for tom would be surviving that was just like because then they go no or yes right right um you know the polar bears know that there's other bears like the polar bears have

any indication right that there's other bears out there yeah okay or do they no but it's true polar bears might think oh we're the only fucking bears but then if I don't think can I just tell you something I'm not a zoologist I am not of the belief that polar bears

have that kind of existential angst that you're talking about okay yeah but it'd be quite mate I would fucking love nothing more

that would be one of the moments I know I've had success if I could go to the Arctic with a big brown bear like walk up to a polar bear and go i've got something to show you mate and he'd be like he'd look at obviously would say anything because he's a bear and then i'd just point behind me and there'd be a fucking bear there and hopefully they'd get on people go to me um how come you're not doing the wolf and owl anymore? Oh, it's just, well, it's a long story. Tom went missing for a while.

And then eventually we found his body and that of a brown bear, absolutely savage to death by a polar bear he'd approached like he was a mate down the pub. My point being, it would blow his mind. He'd look and go, fuck, you're just like, we're both bears. I didn't even know that you were here.

That's what I mean about, you know, the world. Can I just ask you a question? Do you watch Winnie the Pooh and think it's a documentary? No, I don't. But my point is, right, it's like saber-toothed tigers, right? And normal tigers. Like, you know. Do you mean the extinct saber-toothed tigers?

Is that what you're talking about? The saber-toothed tiger that hasn't been around? Are they extinct? Yes, they are. Have you seen ice age right yeah yeah so are

you wanting the impression that you might bump into a woolly mammoth no I

don't know what about snow leopards I don't know I think snow leopards this is why

it would be great I'd like to do a special of the wolf and it feels like

I'm sick of the wolf and it is you go so thanks for coming on I appreciate there's no fee but I'd like to do a special of the Wolfenau, and it feels like I'm sick of the Wolfenau. What I think would happen is you'd go, so, well, thanks for coming on. I appreciate there's no fee,

but listen, so Sabretooth Tigers and Tigers, do they ever knock about? And then this zoologist would go, well, this has clearly been a waste of my fucking time. Do you know what I mean? I'm being asked similar questions to what I was asked when I went to visit a reception at the local primary school. No, and it wouldn't be

like we'd give them a nice bit of lunch or something you know they might be vegan like you I suspect I suspect

they'll decline lunch would be my my instinct we can actually like have a bit of lunch speaking of instinct do tigers have an instinct to scratch themselves

down below because I often do and I wonder if that sort of originated from the animals and that's passed on do you think I scratch myself quite a lot

because we've had this chat about you well you made up a fallacy no I do not have a habit of scratching myself for some reason

you like to you like to perpetuate for the first two or three years for the first two or three years I thought you had fleas.

You're scratching yourself so much. Fleas or herpes, at least. What would you rather have? Fleas? I'm not going to get into this. Anyway, the Rainforest Cafe. No, no, no. That's quite a good question.

What? Would you rather have fleas or herpes? Fleas all day long. Have you ever had fleas? No, no, no, no. Have you ever had fleas no no no have you ever had you know what I had back in the day this is

have you ever had scabies no but I I was going out with a girl that had scabies I got scabies from a girl

years ago and what happened it's horrible can I ask is it like can you see them moving under your skin the scabies

no no it's just it's horrible and it's itchy and it's yeah yeah Can I ask, Bush, can you see them moving under your skin, the scabies? No, I'm not. It's just, yeah, it's horrible and it's itchy and it's, yeah. How did you treat it? I think you get, a fucking long time ago now, I think you get like a cream. Can I just double check? Because you did think that the cooties was herpes. You also thought that snogging was anything you didn't do to your mum. So what I'm slightly concerned about is that what you're calling scabies

is actually gonorrhoea. No, no, no, no, it was definitely scabies. I went to the doctor. Right, okay. And then also, like, I was seeing this girl who, like, had given it to me, and then I didn't want her to feel bad, so I sort of tried to pretend I didn't have it. And also then, like, when she dumped me,

which was sort of, you know, quite was quite soon after the scabies incident, it was very hard to then get back into the game as a scabies sufferer. Scabies, by the way, isn't like cooties or herpes of the mouth where it can come back. Once you got rid of it, you have to sort of realign with someone with scabies to get it back.

Yeah, okay. But how were you struggling to meet new people? Were you saying to them, I've just climbed it? Look, you know me, I'm quite a sort of tactile guy. I like a handshake, I like a fist bump. Like, they're out of the quick, you know, if you've got scabies, no one's shaking your hand, man. I know that, but what I'm saying is,

when you went out with another girl, you were cleared of scabies I once got rid of the scabies but then I'd sometimes make a joke about the scabies and then they

like scabies sounds horrible as well I know and also what I would say is this is what I think about scabies

is if you really know somebody if you're in love with somebody or you're going out with somebody and they get scabies you just sort of go

well that's a bit horrible if you first get to know somebody and they've got scabies or recently had scabies that that becomes imprinted on your impression that's a permanent belief that person is scabied in your mind's eye it's like living in a house that you really really love that's a bit old and it's kind of got a bit of character you've been there since you were a kid but it's got a bit of damp and the wallpaper's not great but you go i fucking love this place i've done a lot of growing here i've done a lot of learning but if you went to see it as a new house you go it's fucking damp everywhere and the wallpaper's peeling off yeah yeah it's

actually one of your that's it actually might be the best analogy you've ever done because normally sort of you know you'd sort of compare it to like a pumpkin or something. You carved it out of Halloween. One of your eyes is a bit gummy, but you sort of look at the eyes. You get to love this pumpkin. You say, this pumpkin's one of my own. If somebody else came along and saw the pumpkin, they'd be like, oh, fucking hell, you ruined Halloween, mate. And do you know what I'd do?

I'd put my arm around the pumpkin. I'd say, do you know what? You're a sweet, sweet soul. Keep doing you, pumpkin brother. You'd probably do a fist bump. Well, no, hold on a minute. Pumpkins don't have fists. I'll tell you what would be a good idea.

If you made some pumpkin fists to go either side of the... You get your large pumpkins. You could make it... Fucking hell. Make a whole body out of pumpkins would be fucking cool. Yeah, that'd be really cool.

You should do that this Halloween. I'm a big pumpkin man. For little James. I haven't got the patience. I've not got the patience. Catherine's a great pumpkin moulder. I'm not. Yeah. Are you on the impression... Have you done... Have I done pumpkin got the patience. Catherine's a great pumpkin moulder. I'm not. Yeah.

Have I done pumpkin carving? Yeah. Is that what you're about to ask me? Yeah, I have. Yeah. I can imagine you're quite... What have you got to say about it? Because you've asked...

It's a leading question. Do you know what sometimes I feel like when I'm talking to you on this podcast? I feel like fucking a Tory MP and you're Jeremy Paxman. To be fair. I'll take that. And you start off with a nice and innocent question

and then you just follow up with a fucking sucker punch. No, no, no. But I can imagine you being good at pumpkin. I can imagine you're quite tactile and sort of like effervescent, sort of pumpkin carver. For the first time, not only have you mispronounced the word,

you've mispronounced the wrong word for this sentence. So the word you were looking for is effervescent, and that doesn't even work in the context of what you're talking about. It's like fucking double-decker. What does effervescent mean then? Effervescent is like a bubbly personality. You can use it to describe drinks as well, effervescent. I can imagine you carving a pumpkin,

absolutely fucking buzzing off your t. It's been very bad. Oh, fucking hell, Dio. The pumpkins are here, mate. Quick, Charlie, Alex, to the kitchen. Come on, pumpkin time. That's you being... It's my ongoing battle that I have on this podcast that when you do that voice, it cuts me to my core.

But whenever it goes out out that's always everyone's fucking highlight a lot of people are loving your representation me seeing that now you've fucking got it into a massive motion picture i was not i was being a fucking big old audition for you look i was not doing you in chicken run okay like what what a lot of people have messaged me it's like oh it's really sweet because it's like the big thick rat dorky rat with your voice anyway listen i'm telling this story about rainforest cafe we're fucking 12 minutes in so we've got to the bottom okay okay rainforest cafe in the light in the evenings used to become a nightclub. Were you aware of that?

Yeah, yeah. Can I just say just as well, it used to be linked to Trocadero, which was pretty cool. Yeah, that was cool. I used to like the little arcades in Trocadero. Oh, mate. That's right. I spent days there.

My first dalliance with VR was in Trocadero. Do you remember that? Oh, wow. VR spaceships. Anyway, I was in Rainforest Cafe once and it was like

they did an R&B and hip hop it was like a really good R&B and hip hop night and I went with a few mates and they it's a bit sad they went to the bar

and for some reason I stood on my own by the table maybe trying to save the table or something what oh my god sorry

what is that bag attendant you got some shots to fire am I sorry no but I'd sooner

the bag attendant thing at least I'm fucking going in like how many people I need to go to the bar

how many mates were you with I think maybe there's maybe seven or eight of us I think seven yeah I don't

know why so six of them all had to go to the, what's it called? Right, yeah, you five better come give me a hand

with a drink to carry your own and one other person can carry Robert's shit. Yeah, I don't know, I don't know why I was on my,

anyway, I was on my own, right? I was on my own and these two guys walked past and one of them like, like really shoved me

as he walked past. There used to be a bit of attitude at these places, do you know what I mean? Yeah, yeah, yeah. And this guy shoved past, and then he stared at me like a proper screw face. And then he started typing something on his phone. And then he showed me the phone, and it said, just so you know, I'm deaf, but that doesn't mean that you can fuck with me. Understand? Wow. Understand?

Wow. Right? And then I finished reading the text and I looked up at him and he just screamed in my face, like at the top of his voice. It was fucking bananas, man. That's insane. Yeah.

That's a good thing for a movie, actually. Yeah, I mean, I had done, genuinely, you know sometimes people say I didn't do anything. I genuinely just stood there minding my own business.

Honestly, I didn't even think I made eye contact. Heing my own business like honestly he was looking for a fight he was looking for a fight yeah but I mean there's part you know it's part of me that thinks that maybe he felt a bit vulnerable

because of course he felt vulnerable like very paranoid yeah but you know what he's you're in the rainforest cafe right

which is very animalistic of that time there'd been like fucking all the different animals unless they they'd still be there I wouldn't be able to get rid of them so there'd'd been like fucking all the different animals that honestly, they'd still be there, wouldn't be able to get rid of them.

So, there'd have been almost like quite a sort of big sort of jungly feel. I mean, quite sort of like full on with that music playing as well, right?

Yeah. Which is fucking quite intense and quite aggressive at times. What music? The beat is running through. Oh, right. R&B. Yeah,

a bit of hip hop. He can, all he, yeah, obviously he's deaf, so he can just feel the sort of, like, you know, the beat of it. And then he's looked round,

I'm guessing, for someone to pick on because he feels vulnerable and he's probably clocked your table, seeing the rest of your group just leave you on the table. I was like the gazelle. Actually, I was like the gazelle

at the back of the back. I know, I think he probably thought you were quite hard you'd be given a fucking that's like massive mate in a war film if you're fucking

like you're leaving your the troops got to go and take a castle or whatever and you've got to leave someone

back at base you're not leaving you're going to leave one of the toughest guys there who can fucking hold your base on his own

even with a big machine gun and so that's what he's seen he said oh this guy's probably quite hard yeah well I didn't hold my base actually I own even with a big machine gun that's what he said this is probably quite hard I didn't hold my

base actually my base was quivering my base was terrified a fresh voice can speak to you and open your

ears and your mind to new views and new perspectives. The call of the wild, a crescendo of culture. Listen as a chorus of fresh voices moves you, taking you to greater heights. Add your voice to the mix and let fresh answer back with perfect harmony in pure Michigan. Keep it fresh at Michigan.org. Ooh, French lavender soy blend candle. I told you HomeSense has good gift options. Hmm, well, I don't know.

Mom's going to love it. She'll take one sniff and be transported to that anniversary trip you took to San Tropez a few years ago. Forget it. She complained about her sunburn the whole trip. It's only $14. $14? Now that's a vacation I can get behind. Deal so good, everyone approves. Only at HomeSense. Hello, darlings. This is Lisa Vanderpump. Will you join me in France for a new reality show? Meet my hand-selected staff as they work, live and play at Chateau Roosevelt. Their job is to provide once-in-a-lifetime experiences for our guests. And of course they'll have to meet my standards, and not everybody has what it takes. Vanderpump Villa has first-class luxury and world-class drama.

I'll be there will you? Vanderpump Villa premieres April the 1st streaming on Disney Plus. That would have been awful if your friends had all come back and left you at the table. Well they did the classic thing of like they came back and I just told them

the story and they went right let's just fuck this guy up what the fuck man you don't fuck around I don't know if you've had this

I had a couple of mates I used to knock about with I still do know a couple of them they were just as soon as anything like that happened they're ready to go

this is it I always noticed it was like they were those friends of mine were always like sort of like intimidated by having a good time or dance. Yeah.

And actually aggression was their go-to. Yeah. I used to have horrible times at nightclub. Do you know, this is a bleak thing. I don't know if I've told this story before. This is like, so your situation there happened with an outsider of your clique. I remember being in Tiger Tiger in Croydon, right, with a group of friends. And I had, like, a new jacket on that I thought looked really, really cool.

It had, like, a hoodie jacket type thing. I really do think we could have been in Tiger Tiger at the same time. I used to go to Tiger Tiger in Croydon all the time. Yeah, well, if you were here this night, you'd remember. Anyway, one of my mates was going, mate, that's a fucking sick jacket, bruv. That's such a fucking nice jacket. It's really, really really really like sort of making me feel like a million bucks telling me how amazing my jacket is and he went i'll do me a favour mate let me see just pull the hood up see

what it's like and i pulled the hood up and he'd emptied an ashtray in the hood oh yeah he did tell me this yeah yeah where did the ask did he find it funny he did i find it funny did he find it awful oh he found everyone at the table yeah the group all found it hilarious but then about a week later they're all sort of like start going oh you know what that was really out of order because this is i didn't want to come out for a while after that i sort of like and it was really like there was a group of girls on another table he was very like yeah he's a charismatic guy and i'm fucking brilliant but yeah he made uh he made a lot of people uh but then i you know it's not like i sort of held a grudge i still

wanted to be his friend it's so yeah well i mean weirdly some you want to be there's part of you that wants to be the person watching him empty the astro in someone else's hoodie that's a sad thing isn't it yeah yeah and you know the thing, yeah. But like in your case, I would never have been trusted to hold a table of my own. My place in the group was like, get up to the bar, mate, you're the biggest. So you can just stand there and just give us a nod and a few of us will come and help you with drinks.

Yeah. And then someone would sort of like thrust the sort of like crumpled up old 20 pound note into my hand. Sort of like, you know. Yeah. I'll buy them, you go and get them yeah so tragic oh god so bleak i mean some like genuinely like because i mean this sounds quite sad now because i don't know what it is it's because of the way i carried myself because of my eye or whatever i don't't know what it is, just generally not being that good-looking a guy.

Like, nightlife would be brutal, do you know what I mean? Like, your mates would go talking to a group of girls or something like that, and then one of the... The number of times I had, like, saw a girl talking to my better-looking friends and then one would look across at me and what she would say with her face was, please do not approach me to talk to me.

See? Just sort of, like, the number of times I'd see her face look across at me and just screw itself up as if to say, I hope that animal's not going to come over and hurt you. I was very much of the world where I was sent over quite a lot of the time for ice-breaking and entertainment. I was essentially like a bird just to make sure the tree wasn't going to fall

down and then the worst thing that my friends used to do like because a couple of my friends like the force is really strong in them they would they would fucking say stuff about you to try and big you up it's so embarrassing i know but like trust me he's proper fun like get to chat to him he's proper fun like look beyond this horrific visage and you will find somebody that once you crack that ugly why all his clothes he'll fit in we're six foot seven your big shirts will even reach his beltline it's so funny when you sort of see all your mates getting excited to go out, and you think this is another night

where we parade the free. You know what's really fun is, like the bit before, like going to a pub and having a chat, but you know what? I'm going to tap out at this point. Oh, my God. Yeah. I know i used to overly i used to be quite loud and silly and fun and mess around yeah and genuinely that thing of like oh yeah he was just like but that would just be to cover up

my shyness and inadequacies and it was just when i look back now it was just so fucking embarrassing that's just that feeling of like oh my god he oh it's such a laugh just hanging out with you but anyway yeah

now the sort of serious thing of sort of actually finding someone I might want to settle down with so yeah it's been nice keep on doing that wacky dance

yeah it's been nice chatting to you and you're a really funny guy but it's getting to about midnight now so I really do need to lock on to somebody that I actually am attracted to if that's okay you've been a nice diversion it's funny that you've been able to mouth all the words of an ice ice baby and you did your mc hammer dance

on the stage honestly the running man was funny but it's not sexually attractive just so you know i had a thing like it's so it's so like like it's such a weird thing as a tall guy because no clothes were made for someone

of my height when I was younger so I used to like constantly just have like a battle with like and no jeans

were long enough so all my shirts were just just about if I was lucky they'd meet my trouser line right so I'd either have to

constantly be pulling the shirt down throughout the night or pulling the trousers up so I had ankle swingers and it wasn't like now it's like it's fashionable

to have those fucking ankle swingers back then it was like you'd have the shit kicked out of you but there's nothing worse I'd say arguably the worst look on a man

and this is like the 90s is a fucking ankle swinging boot cut yeah there's nothing good i had because i had that sort of toffee apple physique like where like my i've still got it now where the the top half of my body is just like so ready to get big and bulky and my legs are just fucking skinny it doesn't matter you know i could they could literally inject pure protein into my quads. And they're not going to get any bigger. That's just how I am.

And then what happened is I'd spend money on, like, a really expensive shirt, wear some jeans. And then, like, when the jeans were, like, slim fit, you just basically look like a... Honestly, mate, it's like a fucking smock on a pole. Do you know what I mean? Just like... It's so fucking

indignified and also for some reason you look in the mirror at home and you think okay this looks good and in any photo I look like the fucking

there's a Moschino shirt being raised as a flag do you know what I mean like so horrible when skinny jeans came in like that was it

I was done I couldn't you couldn't like literally my arse would just be like spilling out the top like a really bad cleavage

and because my shirts weren't long enough it would almost be like my the top of my bum cheeks were like eyes just peering over a pair of jeans

yeah do you know that do you know that that poster that everyone used to have with the graffiti and it was like a wall and some guy I thought you meant the tennis. I thought you meant the tennis girl. No, no, no. I thought you meant the tennis girl.

No, no, no. The wall would be like a big cartoon of a bloke looking over the top. That's what my arse is always like on a night out. Just peeking over the top. Hold on, Rom. I want to have a look at what's going on here. You're an icon diva. Let's check it out.

What's hilarious is that's one look that's never been sexy. It never was. Oh, fuck it. You should see his arse cave. It's just fucking badly. Oh, my God. He's got three solid inches of crack out there, fucking sexy bastard.

And back in those days as well, wearing those really loose fittings, sort of like fucking boxer shorts, like the fucking cotton sort of like, they weren't like now where you wear like a sort of jockey sort of like fucking boxer shorts, like the fucking cotton, sort of like, they weren't like now where you wear like a sort of jockey, sort of whatever, tighter one.

It was like the loose ones, wasn't it? I mean, honestly, my mates would treat me like, genuinely, when I watched 40-Year-Old Virgin, I've never related to a film more in my life.

This group of guys sort of clubbing together to try and get this fucking loser some sort of clubbing together to try and get this fucking loser some sort of fucking interaction with a woman it was so bad man

oh my god oh my god I've really darkened myself out can you remember when you like like if you if you would like

sort of this is so tragic I remember on the nights that I I would like meet someone get on with them and like, you know,

maybe like, yeah, you'd have a kiss and a bit of a snog or whatever and you'd exchange numbers. Like, my mates would be like,

really like, you know, hold up mate, just play it cool. Like, I'd literally, I'd have, like by the time

mobile's coming, like I would have been trying to call someone by the time, like at three in the morning just to make sure it was the right number and about sort of

7.30, 8 o'clock next morning call and go hello yeah oh yeah is Sammy there please yeah no no it's Tom I met her

she's not up yet yeah just so I called yeah so she lives here does she oh that's great no that's cool that's good if it was socially acceptable I would have walked around

the club with a t-shirt with my phone number on it in the desperate hope that I'd get some sort of contact you know what would have happened there though you'd just have like those are the days of the dirty phone call t-shirt with my phone number on it in the desperate hope that I'd get some sort of contact. You know what would have happened there, though? Those are the days of the dirty phone call. Oh, yeah.

You'd have had, oh, did anyone get the number of that case? Yeah, with his number. With a t-shirt with his phone number on it. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I've got it. Yeah, yeah. Let's do some phone calls. It's four in the morning, your mum answering the phone. Wanker! Oh, God.

So tragic. I'm trying to cut down carbs at the moment. Have you done that yet? I mean, you obviously have because you're such a fat boy. No, I haven't cut down carbs. Well, actually, it's something... I was talking about it on stage the other night, but I haven't really figured out what my point is but this contradictory advice that we're constantly

getting given about what to eat i i just find it unbelievable like so if you scroll through tiktok now my algorithm keeps giving me yeah but this is by the way can i say yeah fuck it any helmet with a six-pack is turning around now saying they're a nutritionist i know and it's like something insane like 10 of people in the world can actually get it for most of us it's unobtainable yeah but the thing is it's really a dangerous thing yeah but like that so i i saw i was listening to i i not well i i happen to be listening to uh the high performance podcast have you heard that that podcast right the jake humphrey one right about like yeah i like it it's good yeah yeah so they did an advert for tiktok it was a tiktok it was an advert for tiktok right now listen full disclosure oh god here we go again

full disclosure i'm a tiktok fan like i don't know if i'm an advocate for tiktok but i'm on it i would say disproportionate amount of time for a 45-year-old man, right? Yeah. And then the algorithm, and on the podcast, they did an advert and they said, you can get loads of information from TikTok. TikTok is basically like visual Wikipedia. Anybody can sort of deliver, vomit out their information,

and they deliver it with a level of authority. And just because of the way they, and the way they do it is so certain as well. Are you doing bicep curls like this? You might as well wank. Because what you're actually doing is damaging your arm muscles and leading to some mobility problems in the future. And you say, what? I feel like I say, what's your fucking qualification?

They need to have some sort of fucking certificate in the description or something so I know that you know what you're talking about. That's one thing, but nutrition is a whole fucking other one. Mate, you scroll through TikTok, right? There'll be one video going, I haven't eaten carbs for 20 years. And look at me.

Look, that's the physique you get. People seem to think it's about fat. It's about calories. It's about cutting carbs. I've not seen a carb for 22 years. And this is what I'm repping. And then you scroll to the next thing and go, are you cutting out carbs?

You're probably going to die in the next six months. You need carbs to survive. Carbs equals muscle equals dick length. I can't. But are you somebody who's cutting out carbs? You're a fucking idiot. You're a fucking idiot. Moron.

And you just go, what the fuck is going on? Just today, mate, before I logged into this podcast, there was a woman talking about how fucking spinach is the biggest fucking health myth in the food industry okay if you are eating spinach you are fallen victim to one of the biggest hoodwinks in the food industry so what the fuck is going on here do you know i mean i'm just waiting for them to cry i'm waiting for them to decry water mate that's that's that's when i know we finally fucking hit tipping point you know the one that I don't like? So when I say giving up carb, I'm not giving up, giving up carb. I'm just trying to cut down.

I eat a fuck ton of bread, potatoes, chips. So what I'm trying to do is just hold back on eating too many of those carbs. I'm still eating a load of vegetable, a load of fruit, whatever, bits of rice, whatever. I'm just trying to cut back on having too much heavy carbs day to day. But then that stands up.

You're trying to get nutrient-dense foods is what you're trying to get. rather than just having, like, if I'd sit and eat like fucking five, fucking six slices of bread with some soup and that's just like so fucking bad yeah right um but I like Stephen Bartlett I've it's one of my

favorite podcasts I think he's fucking brilliant but he's he's got this one at the moment every time I go on TikTok they're pushing this the greens that he does right this is the advert yeah just try it just yeah try it i like to get my my fruits and vegetables in every day what's the chance of me doing that i'm going to be honest with you sometimes i don't do that but with this the probability has been increased to close to 100 just try it that yeah i see that all the time. No, no. You've missed the best line. It's always like, I've tried a load of these.

I've tried a load of these. But these ones are the best. These ones are the best. Because you're fucking... You own the company. Of course they're the best to you. It's a great advert, but you've...

Of course these... It'd be insane if you were fucking representing another one. So, any earnestly... And also, it's not impossible to go right I'll have fucking

some raspberries some strawberries some apple you're fucking half your fucking stuff's done then do you know what I mean but I'm interested in

that as a thing right my job exactly where you are and also like I mean we don't know what we're talking about

TikTok I find that like Instagram I tend to look at everyone I like. TikTok, I go into a rabbit hole of watching people that I never ever talked to in a bar, like really quite toxic people or sort of like, but I'm sort of like led to them.

It's actually a little bit like the friends I used to hang out with that I've got rid of or sort of like moved away from in my life because they were quite fucking negative. But then I end up sitting watching that shit on TikTok and sort of thinking, why? I've just spent an hour. The biggest thing... I should have just watched Spots getting squeezed.

Yeah, I mean, that's what you tend to do according to Grats. But I... No, I do watch that a lot. One of the biggest inventions that's a nightmare for me on TikTok is auto-scroll. So now you don't even have to swipe. You just set it to auto scroll. It just runs, runs, runs, runs.

Really? Yeah. I don't think I want to do that. You don't want to do it. Trust me, you don't want to do it. Do you know what? I can't get my head around it. Have you seen the TikTok live battle games?

No. What's that? Oh, my God. They're insane. So essentially, it's like you have four different people from, you know, we cut people from maths or Love Island or something, and they'll have like a TikTok game where they're playing against another couple of people, and it's like who can get the most likes

and who can get the most strawberry fucking crowns and shit like that. But then it's like sales pitches. It's like, you know, and then it's like sales pitches it's like and then they're like come on team we're doing well we need to get Amber to 10,000 likes

let's get Amber to 10,000 likes oh mate she's on 9,800 likes let's get her to 10,000 guys and then I'm like

what is this but I watched one last night with that Luke guy from Maths and I watched him and three other people on their foot and I'm just sitting there just thinking what am I like Man City versus Brentford which was a fucking banging game was on and I'm more got my head in my phone watching three people

I never meet I never have anything to do with trying to get more people to like what they're saying and there are and I'm like if you could if you surely you've got to say something Marvin because it is that salesmanship bullshit what's the salesmanship bullshit well just that fucking come on man follow yeah you're gonna get oh yeah yeah i'm just i'm really conscious by the way of being too negative about things but fuck it so we're uh we've our car lease has come up so we're just looking at the moment for a new family car you know just just

decided what to change it to so we went to a garage the other day and just to look at some some cars and started chatting to a young lady

who worked there me, Catherine and Grace were there she was lovely and we were sort of like very like we're not we're not deciding

what we want at the moment we don't really we're just looking it's just like sort of very informal like sort of like very like, we're not deciding what we want at the moment. We don't really, we're just looking. It's just like sort of very informal, like sort of like searching. Yeah. And which meant that someone came down and really tried to put the hard sale on us.

Right. And he was like, you know, do you want to buy the car or PCP this thing? I was like, probably lease it if I'm honest with you. And he was like, yeah, leasing's like shit for everyone. It's really bad, man. Leasing's not great for you. I was like, well, like well yeah i mean i quite like the fact that you pay monthly what you're going to have it's not an extortionate money and then at the end of it he said yeah at the end of it you've got to give the car back i was like yeah and you change it for another car and you lease again like cars just lose their value and he was like let me

just say something because you're a nice guy you're a nice guy but you don't know what you're talking about when it comes to cars i have an i have an old adage there's no such thing as a free lunch unless you're a mouse and when a mouse gets a free lunch it gets trapped what i don't understand what that means like surely if i'm in pcp with you it's the same as like like a car's trapped me anyway like i'm gonna lose money and i tried to get but he had about 10 of these and everything he talked in that sort of it's annoying when somebody does nothing like he does like a weird analogy that doesn't make any fucking sense it's so irritating isn't it yeah yeah he had to just you can't but must have been

the salesman of it but he was just yeah in the end I was like you know what this is the car that I was 80%

sure I was going to get and now I'm looking elsewhere for any other model or any other car or any other brand. At Enterprise, we know you're constantly on the move. Getting this.

Thanks, Mom. Fixing that. You reach a destination. And then it's on to the next. And when life is moving at the speed of, well, life, Enterprise is right there with you, around the corner and around the globe.

We'll keep you moving forward. Enterprise. For lives and drive. In today's economy, saving money is like an extreme sport. Coupon clipping. Promo code searching. It takes skill. Speed. Sweat.

Unless we're talking Kudo's new phone, internet, and streaming bundle. With the Happy Stack, you can sit back and stack up the savings on Kudo Internet, a sweet phone plan, Netflix, Disney Plus, and Amazon Prime. All starting at just $99 a month. Stack more, spend less.

The Happy Stack. Only at CUDO. Conditions apply. The all-new Hyundai Kona all-electric SUV isn't inspired by the future. It's obsessed with it. Because we look forward and see more. More beauty. More technology. And more possibilities.

Welcome to the future of urban suvs the all-new hyundai kona we made it more one speaking of being negative you you um fired some shots at me about my social media recently on text, didn't you? Mate, I quite enjoyed it. I enjoyed what you did. You didn't say that. I enjoyed the fact that I said, I enjoyed the fact that I said about a month ago,

oh, you've got to start doing these talking to camera-esque videos. And you were very much like, oh, do we? Is that what life is now? And now you're Mr fucking no I did a couple of them because things occurred to me and then I got a text okay what's the deal what is the deal

with below deck what am I doing here I enjoyed them I thought they were great you sent me a text saying, stepping up with the socials, bro. Laughing face emojis. What happened?

No, no, no, no. But look, mate, look. Let's be very candid here. You've been very, very open in your... I put what I thought was a really informative video up on TikTok of behind the scenes of my tour. Yeah, I said loving this content. Yeah, mate. Let this content. Yeah.

Mate, let me just tell you, right, I know what loving this content means when it comes from you and you've typed it. You've watched that. I've got on that video, I think, probably, if I'm lucky, 800 views. 650 will be you. Oh, I can't believe this. That great big, that great big wally look at him yeah that's the

problem with that's the problem with doing things on socials is you do it and even if it's good in my head i just think oh god tom's gonna fucking love this man i'm gonna get it's not just me i'll meet you to me're fine, because that'll be an indication of what literally everyone else in our industry is saying. But then you kind of got to take the stabilisers off and go, well, other people don't give a fuck, right? Yeah. Some of my favourite people,

like Bert Chrysler, right, is one of my favourite comedians. I love Bert. I think he's brilliant, right? He couldn't give a fuck what he's saying on social media. That's true. I think we should be more like that. There's no shit's given.

Yeah. Yeah, I think we should. Loads that there's no shit's given yeah yeah I think we should loads of Americans are like that they just don't care they just say what's in their head yeah like the amount of times I've recorded something

put it out God's put it out and thought oh no this is just who cares yeah like who cares and that's why

I did respect the fact you put out what you did because I thought you know what he's fucking actually doing it. No, but you always get a comment that says something like, what was the point of you saying this, right? And to those people, I'd like to say,

there is no point to any of this, okay? None of it has a point, okay? If you're going onto Instagram for something that has a point, you've come to the wrong fucking place, all right? All of it's pointless. Most of what we do in our day to day is pointless, actually. So, just get some fucking perspective. All of the

shit that we're talking about, the things that we've made important to give us a sense of purpose, most of them are pointless. Because otherwise, we'd just be sat here shitting and eating. So, we're trying to give ourselves some sort of purpose. Do you ever find yourself just saying pointless things just to break silences?

You're quite a good silent guy, actually. You're a silent guy. I'm comfortable with silence. But you are so bad. Not bad at it. There's nothing wrong with it. Oh, no, I'm awful at silence but any moments of silence

you immediately indicate as a sign that the other person doesn't like you anymore is what look and that goes even now to my wife to my best friend

it's even started to sort of like come into me and my daughter's relationship to me like you know unconditionally, you're one of my favourite people on the entire planet. But yet, if I go for a period of not talking to you very much, it's just like, you're okay, bro.

Just, yeah, what's going on with these crisps then? Fucking hell. Crispy, isn't it? Fucking crispy. These bad boys. Wrong? Mate, I had it with my daughter yesterday. What happened? She was just playing on her own. And we were just sitting in the quiet. She was playing on her own. fucking crispy these bad boys wrong mate I had it with my daughter yesterday what happened

she was just playing on her own and we were just sitting in the choir she was playing on her own I was just sort of sitting there just wanting like I think to have some dad and daughter

like time together and she was sort of quite happy playing on her own I went you alright Chris you okay and she's like okay yeah

and I'm like you wanna play and I sort of started bringing cars over and she went no no and then walked off and just sort of played on her own on the other side of the room.

One of the only examples I've heard of a child thinking the parent's being too thirsty with their attention. You thought I was thirsty? Mate, I know that's in my remit. I sometimes want to go back and examine why that's there. Well, I'll tell you know it's like i i sometimes want to go back and examine why that's there well i tell you why it's nice because it's because and i i have a similar thing where like you you have this constant you know i'm all right with silences but i would say my ongoing fear that somebody doesn't like i mean it's the analysis i put into text message replies the analysis i put into even

that would happen even with you there'll be times times when, like, so, for example, I was chatting to Jamie Redknapp on the phone the other day and we were actually singing your praises. We were talking about, started talking about Wonka and how talented you are

and stuff like that. I mean, in the middle of that conversation, even though I know that you and I are, like, best mates, I thought, God, Tom really is talented.

I wonder if he's wondering why he's friends with me now. I was having that thought as I'm talking to Redknapp. I know, but this is the thing. It's like, there's a whole thing of like,

since Wonka's been out, I think people seem to think that for some reason that will completely, ultimately change who I am, all my DNA and all my, like, look, me and you were talking before we came on here about stand up and about everything.

And yeah, and it is very nice and i'm i feel very blessed in our industry and outside of our industry people complimenting me on wonko and saying lovely things it's it literally means the world because i have very little you know it's not like i was in my head go that's amazing i have so many fucking questions about myself yeah so i do find that really fucking incredible. Okay. But what I would say is before you carry on,

imagine being in that mindset, but you haven't done Wonka. Okay. That's, that's where I'm at. You've done enough. You've hosted the fucking bastard. It's not like I'm fucking talking to someone who's on an open mic. He's waiting for his first TV gig

you've just taken over Claudia Wickleman's show on Radio 2 you're fucking the face of Radio 2 on a weekend now oh fucking fucking guy turning up in the soup kitchen in a fucking Armani suit fucking it was tough out there wasn't it

is that you pulling up in a Range Rover was it Rob? yeah yeah yeah there wasn't it so you put it up in a Range Rover was it Rob yeah yeah yeah what soup is it oh it's ham hock oh for fuck's sake I'm a vegan aren't I you got any peas

knocking about love no but anyway sorry I interrupted you with that it was bad no no no but I yeah

I know you're the same but it's a weird thing of like I don't it's very nice but I constantly am full of just yeah that is just who I am as a person and it's a weird thing of like, I don't, it's very nice, but I constantly am full of just, yeah,

that is just who I am as a person. And it's probably never going to go away. Self-doubt, I need verification. Like even you telling me that you and Jamie spoke, I'm like, I called Jamie the other day and he's not phoning back. That's all I took away from that conversation.

I thought you were really in the room. It's very nice, you've both been complimentary, but I did call Jamie about a week ago and left quite a nice voice note for him as well, just in case he didn't see I had a missed call and I've had nothing back. So I had Jamie, who's one of my close mates,

absolutely was like, oh, God, fuck's sake. Yeah. All right, listen listen we've got like a couple of minutes left do you want to do an email like a quick one should we do one

yeah it feels like we should really push this week when we do a bonus to actually do an email episode okay

this is from thanks once again to the swan I say once again I've not thanked her for a long time because I've not done any fucking emails. But thanks once again to the... How is the Swan?

Is she good? She's really good, actually. She's really good, yeah. How's the training for the half marathon going? Not good, I would say. For both of you or just you? Well, we've been going to the gym, but we haven't been doing running training together, really.

I'll tell you why... You used to have weighted vests. The tour is making... Yeah yeah i saw you post that on instagram about a weighted vest but um i uh i went basically because i've been on tour when i then come home my inclination is to hang out with lisa and the kids and do fun stuff because i've been away for a bit and then the idea of like going we're going to pop out for an hour than an hour and a half to run has over the last week anyway it's felt a little bit not felt the right thing to do but now i'm slightly nervous but anyway look uh thank you to this one uh this is from the clumsy emu

uh hi all my girlfriend the black cat was asked as part of a sales pitch for a new card game if she could have a sleepover with any celebrity, who would it be? After a good 30 seconds of pondering, she replied, mine's going to sound weird, but Romesh Ranganathan. Her colleagues promptly followed with their favourite pop stars,

Harry Styles and Taylor Swift. I would like to ask you both the same question. How old is she? How old is... Doesn't say. Doesn't say. But, I mean, Harry Styles you both the same question. How old is he? How old is... Doesn't say. Doesn't say. But, I mean, Harry Styles and Taylor Swift suggest young. Roma, Schrodinger and Nathan suggest middle age, I would say.

I'd like to ask you both the same question. Yeah, but she might just be older than them. That's true. Also, you know, you can never have Roma, Schrodinger and Nathan without this is going to sound weird or this is a bit embarrassing. Yeah, no, but also, just quickly, like, age demographic age demographic wise it's like you kind of have to know that with this because it's interesting right because if they're like 21 22 and that would be I'd say the age that I'd say that you'd be asking for Taley Swift or Harry Styles you know maybe up to 25 where it's socially

acceptable to say them it's kind of weird if she 21, 22 and saying Romesh Ranganathan coming round. I feel like I'm being accused of something here. It's just a hypothetical thing. I'm not accusing you of anything. You haven't done anything. It's all hypothetical, but I'm just saying. If I don't think Lisa would be called if you went, I'm off out tonight, Leislav,

and she'd be like, oh, where are you going? And you'd be like, oh, I'm off out tonight, Leigh Slough, and she'd be like, oh, where are you going? And you'd be like, oh, just heading out. I'm going to go round Kelly's house for a sleepover. It'd be like, what? Pardon? Who's Kelly? You know, the 22-year-old girl, she listens to the Whoopin' Hour. She's half free to go round there.

Leigh's just not letting you do that, is she? Well, I mean, you know, it's innocent. Do you know what I mean like yeah it's innocent but she's happily in a relationship as am I do you know what I mean yeah but you can't hang out it'd be fucking a bit weird I suppose you could both sit there and watch

TikTok together yeah I can tell you what I honestly think and I have this whenever I like a few of the tour shows it's been very nice and people have this, whenever I, like, a few of the tour shows, it's been very nice and people have waited outside the stage door to have a chat. But whenever I do have a chat with them, I'm conscious of the fact that I need to keep this quick because the longer I talk, the longer they realise what I'm really like.

Do you know what I mean? See, I think that's a misconception of you. I think you carry that with you, and I don't think that's true. Well, I certainly don't think I could survive a sleepover in terms of respect. No, no, but, mate, I would say that I love a sleepover. I'd say I'm in the top ten people in the world to have a sleepover with. Right?

Fucking always got fucking funny ideas of things to do. Well, there I'd love to stop you. Because that's exactly why you'd be in the bottom ten list of people that I'd want to have a sleepover with okay what's your sleepover

going to be like my sleepover is being nudged awake at 3am because you've got a new theory about beetroots mate

if I'm at a sleepover you ain't getting nudged you're getting tickled awake at 3am mate you'll be fucking out let me tell you sleepover wise with me there's no fucking sleeping it's just all fucking nuts that's what i'm talking about you fucking giggling in

your nighty my snack i'd be fucking turning up i'd turn up with about eight bags of different snacks and different fucking foods like uh well the the the clumsy emu has asked uh who our favorite celebrity sleepover would be with. I'm guessing yours would be Matthew McConaughey, but surprise me. Well, yeah, he'd be up there, Matthew McConaughey. I think the only thing about Matthew McConaughey is I think it would get a bit too deep. How do you mean? I think it would be a real laugh up to about one o'clock in the morning,

and then he'd probably just be like, you know what? I want to talk to you actually about your life, man. And then you'd end up all sort of sitting around and he'd do like a sermon. It would be quite a deep sort of like, you know, what are you doing with yourself? Why are you so keen for everybody to like you? I think it would be just sort of a bit like, yeah.

And, you know, I think you've got to sort of like energy-wise just think who would be. You know who I'd probably go with? Seth Rogen. I think Seth Rogen would be incredible. Oh, mate, that's mine. Seth Rogen would be amazing. Great shout.

Seth Rogen would be great. You know, you'd have a great laugh. He'd just be funny. He'd be able to tag on to the back of jokes, banter. Yeah, feels like he's someone as well,

like would love the snacks. Yeah, he'd probably sort of yeah everyone would have a little smoke even casual smokers would go out and have a little smoke outside

a couple of drinks yeah yeah I think he'd be an asset to any sleepover yeah I agree with you mine would be

actually I'd love to have a sleepover I know I sort of joke about it I'd love to have a sleepover with you Tom oh wow oh mate you know what would be fucking amazing go on if a TikTok long form Actually, I'd love to have a sleepover. I know I sort of joked about it. I'd love to have a sleepover with you, Tom. Oh, wow. Oh, mate, you know what would be fucking amazing? Go on.

If a TikTok long form, we film me and you having a sleepover. We get a hotel room together. What, an eight-hour TikTok? No, no, we cut it down to the highlights. Like when you drift off at about 3am. Yeah, I could imagine the lights would be off and it'd be just you with a torch on the phone going, okay, Rob's fallen asleep.

I've got like a bucket of water and I'm going to throw it over his dick. Just wait. No, no, no, no, no, no. You know what I'd do if I've got a bucket of water, mate? A glass of water, putting your fingers in it. So I wet myself. Yeah.

And I assume that that would backfire on you because I'm assuming you'd have booked a double. There's no twin beds, you know. It's a sleepover. We you'd have booked a double no twin beds in it it's a sleepover we don't have a sleepover with separate beds we top and tail or we big spoon little spoon

that's how we do it that's how I've always done it mate there's a there's a part of me that actually one of my fantasies and dreams now is just doing a fucking sleepover me you

fucking get a really nice hotel room like just like you know loads of nice snacks get some vegan bits some normal bits get a balcony so we can. Like, just like, you know, loads of nice snacks. Get some vegan bits, some normal bits. Get a balcony so we can just sit and look over the world. Just chat a bit. Probably chat about life a bit, like we do on here. Yeah.

Then obviously we'll watch some TV, have a right laugh. Like, watch a film and both comment on it. Do you know what this sounds like? It sounds like... We sound like two TikTokers. You know these TikTokers that think that everything they do is fucking interesting? We book a hotel room.

This is going to be absolute gold. Spend loads on a hotel room, loads of money on snacks. We're fucking busting money on champagne and shit like that. Goes out, eight views. We post the first video on TikTok that makes them introduce dislikes.

We could sit and watch Oppenheimer together. Yeah, that'd be great. That'd be great. I'll tell you what would be quite funny. I'll let my toenails grow, and then I could cut them during the sleepover and paint them. Yeah. I mean, the only thing that I would queer about that

is that you'd have to let your toenails grow. I imagine you're rocking some claws right now as I speak to you. I can't imagine you're regularly making that journey down there to sort those out. It's quite a long way to go. Yeah. It's quite a long way to go. I'm getting a pedicure, actually.

When? Next week. Whereabouts? I'm slightly nervous about it. It's somewhere in Crawley. Lisa sorted it out for me. I asked for a pedicure. I can't wait till Thursday.

Hi, Ash, have you ever asked for a pedicure. I can't wait till Thursday. Hi, so have you ever been for a pedicure before? No, I've just been for my first one. Here's one for you. Can't you start a conversation with someone who's making your feet look nice and pretty? Lisa? Lisa, where's my nice Adidas jacket? don't know i haven't seen it i'm doing one of my tiktoks you know when i talk to the camera about the pedicure what i've just done yeah okay yeah

yeah okay very good very very good also when i got some petrol, and it was one of those ones where you couldn't pay at the pump. I'm going to do one about that. Catherine, do me a favour. Can you get my Stoney jacket, please? Because I'm going to do the dump, the sequel. My Stoney jacket.

right Tom it's about that time my guy do you want to take us out literally you've just done me there no I haven't you've absolutely turned me over no no no that was very good

that was very good that was very good how to make life more simple how to make it more easy you know sometimes in life it's easy to trip up and fall when you make stuff too complicated looking for big moments big answers to questions that actually have very very simple answers see life can be a complex of puzzles and twirls and snakes that turn into ladders, and vice versa, ladders that turn up and turn into snakes.

Truth of the matter is, people say you can't climb up the back of a snake. But you know what? If the snake's strong enough, you can pull yourself up like a rope in gym class. And that's what life's all about. It's not always taking a conventional work route. It's not always taking the hardest route,

but it's not always taking the easiest. It's about taking a route that maybe gives you a story, maybe gives you a fun ending, maybe gives you something you can say in a pub to people when everyone else is lost for conversation. Hey Bobby, guess what? The other day I climbed up the back of a snake. What? You didn't take the ladder? No, because the ladder was easy and the snake felt strong and I guess that's the way i try and live my life it's taking the different route taking another place hey we're all going to end up in the same one so while you're out here and you're batting every now and again go i might put down the bat and see if i can hit this ball with my cap just for a story really really good tom well done thank you yeah i feel like

you're proud of that one um yeah no i felt good i literally had no idea where i was going because i was still getting over the stony thing yeah um can we play us out with a song that's been well the remix of this been played on tick tock a lot but i really love this song it's ocean alley this is so bleak it's a really good it's a really good song though It's a really good song, though. Confidence, Ocean Alec. You'll love it, Tom. Boom.

All right. See you later, guys. We promise it's going to be a TikTok-free episode next week. We're not going to be talking about TikTok. Well, no. The bonus will have no TikTok references. Oh, yeah. Unless someone has a question about TikTok. Well, or somebody does a film pitch that involves us being on TikTok

or something like that. Yeah. Are we doing emails or film? We're going to do a bit of both Tom I thought I thought we could mix it up a little

yeah yeah good good I mean everything could happen couldn't it yeah I mean it depends if yeah and hopefully you've

got some of your new content out so we can discuss that as well okay alright guys take care of yourselves speak to you soon

bye bye big love bye bye bye It's all about confidence, baby She was a confident lady And I know she's driving me crazy Now to run this I know she'll probably hate me If you have a problem, opinion, feedback or anything at all, please email us at wolfowlpod at gmail.com. That's wolfowlpod at gmail.com. That's wolfalpod at gmail.com.

We'd love to hear from you, mainly because we don't have any content ideas. Thank you.