Woman Evolve with Sarah Jakes Roberts - Longevity in Sisterhood w/ B. Simone and Megan Brooks

Episode Date: June 29, 2022

When it comes to sisterhood, just know—the Delegation ain’t new to this, W.E. true to this! So, when God slides a bestie in your life who’s ready to square up for the revolution…tag team & OVERTHROW with her! This week, SJR explores the long-standing friendship between comedienne, actress, and boss babe B. Simone and her business partner, Megan Brooks. Their relationship is proof that in our sameness W.E connect, but in our differences W.E. evolve! Sis, press PLAY & learn how to nurture another woman’s seed. Keep kickin’ it with our homegirls by subscribing to linktr.ee/KnowForSurePod + following @KnowForSurePod for weekly conversations on self-discovery! This episode is sponsored by ShipStation.com + BetterHelp.com/Evolve + Noom.com/Evolve.

God can't bless you for tend to be or who you can care yourself to. He can only bless you and the lane that was created for you. I feel that for somebody. You don't need no itch, it's a unique boundary. What? I don't need your lights, I don't need your elevation. All I need is a God fighting for me that's there for all things. All things, all things.

Child. Sisterhood is tricky. It's fun, all right, but it is tricky. I want to be honest for a minute, when we're kids, that thing is real tricky. But then we become adults, and maybe sometimes even when we're teenagers, we come across friendships that are blessings.

Blessings that we didn't know we needed, but ones we'd never want to live without. Today's co-host, Beesamone and Megan are besties with a dope podcast called No For Sure, and I can't wait to see what they're confident about knowing of sure and what they're honest about still learning. Okay, so I did not know that you were from Dallas. I saw that you posted that and you know that's where I am from as well. Fixes, plays and grow, girl, what part? What? Okay, so I grew up on my rock link.

And that white rock, yeah, yeah, yeah. I went to school and registered, I went to college and dropped out at Fort Worth TCU and Yeah, and then I've lived a few different places since I dropped out of college everything's fine We don't need to get into the podcast yet. No, right. Hi Megan. How are you? Good I've heard so many amazing things about you and I feel like I know you obviously since launching the podcast. How's that been? It's man. It's like the most incredible experience I've ever had. Amazing. It's mind blowing. It's almost like a dream. Like it doesn't even feel real real most. Really? Yeah. Okay, so why? What is it that it is fulfilling in you?

Oh, man, I think, um, finally, like knowing that your, your purpose is like obtainable. Like, if you can, oh, I've always felt like I've wanted to do this, but now actually having it and it's tangible and it's like, we're living it and the impact that it's having on people. It's been like literally like mind blowing. Yeah. There's nothing like discovering how impactful your life and testimony can be in helping other people. Yeah.

Yeah. I think that's intense. Yeah. It's intense. Go, no, what were you going to say, B? Oh, I just was piggybacking. I'm just saying it's intense. Hmm. Really intense. Go, no, what were you gonna say, B? Oh, I just was piggybacking. I was just saying, it's intense. Mm.

Really intense. I feel like I've always, she hasn't been in the limelight. And now that she's in the forefront with me, it feels so comfortable. But I told her I was like, this podcast feels like the most purposeful thing I've ever done in my career. So I've always felt like purposeful, always, always. I never felt like I wasn't walking in my purpose

or being myself or anything like that. But the podcast kind of like made it all make sense. So yeah. Okay, so I want to talk about more about that a little bit later. But first I want to know, how did you all meet and how did you become best friends? Because there's a difference between meeting someone and then being like this, being my girl forever.

Tell me how did it happen? Well, honestly, it was actually just that when we met. Wow. It was funny talking to my mom about it. My mom mentioned that this morning. She was like, I remember you came home from school. I started a new school in Gahanohio. That's crazy.

And she was like, you came home from school and I was like, yeah, this girl came up to me and said that we're gonna be best friends This girl brayland that I met at school I said to her. I don't even remember that but she always remembers. Yeah, how old were you all? 12 wow That's a Yeah, this year was like 20th year anniversary and we started our business on our 20th year anniversary So it was pretty cool. Yeah, so you all were able to maintain your friendship even be some on when you move to Dallas

How did that how did you keep the tie so tight? Well, we kind of stopped talking for a little bit. We went through a period I went into the industry. I was chasing music and I wanted to do music. I was in a girl group and then comedy fell in my lap and I always wanted to do entertainment. But she went and got married and had three boys and had the mom life. So our lives were totally different.

Like total opposites ends of the spectrum. Total opposites. And we started, we would talk here and there on Facebook and social media, but we really like connected and got back into each other's life, what year were that? I think it was there. Fifth, 2015.

15, yeah. Okay, so 2015, I'm curious about this because there are women who grow up with like best friends similar to what you all experienced. And then I think friendship is about surviving those moments where life is twisting and turning, but they're not always twisting and turning in the same direction.

And maybe there is distance that you have with someone who you thought you'd be doing life with forever. In 2015, what brought you back together? And was it as instantaneous the click in 2015 as it was when you were 12. It really was. Like she hit me randomly on Instagram because I think this is around the time Instagram started to become more popular. Yeah.

And I think I was, I was just on Instagram one day and she messaged me and she's like, oh my god, FaceTime me. Like I miss you FaceTime me. And I'm sitting at home, you know, with my kids and we were just chilling hanging out at the house and I FaceTime there. And we like talked and we were catching up and then she was like, come to Atlanta,

I'm filming while I'm out. Yeah. Come to Atlanta, come hang out with me for a couple days. And it literally was just like. It was instinct. Like that. Like she came to Atlanta and she, her motherly, servant spirit, oh my gosh, she just helped me so much.

I was like, son. I was like, the you, what? Help me? The, like she came in, she started cleaning them out, had a meeting or something. No, you had to go film and I dropped her off at filming for a while now. And I could tell like she just needed help. Like, you know, and I was like, well,

I'm gonna drop you off and I'm gonna go back and clean your apartment and like organize for you so it's easier. And she was like, okay, like, and she came back and her apartment was spotless. And it was just a lot, it was just instant, instant. And she just came in like helping. But we didn't even know that was gonna lead to her working for me, which led to us having a 50-50 partnership which is our podcast, you know? Okay, so I'm curious because you all have different lives, at least from what I can see from the outside looking in, and that like Megan, you've gone, you know,

you did the family route, be Simone, you were building your career and pursuing your life as a creative. And I think that these are some of the nuances that make friendship and sisterhood challenging is when our lives feel different. Like we're not in the same industry, we're not in the same circle.

And sometimes this is where like jealousy is bred as well. Because somebody like maybe I want them airing the kids, I've got the career, but she's got this or vice versa. How do you survive the areas where jealousy is possible but overcome them in your friendship? You want to answer? Oh, I think just knowing yourself, I'm really, really big on self evolution and self love.

It's very easy to be jealous of somebody when you're not doing the self work. And anything, we talked about this on, I think on one of our podcast episodes recent, I was like, everything that she has that I, I want marriage, I want, I look to her and I'm like, that's inspiring to me. I love how she is as a mom. I love how she is as a wife. That is encouraging me to be that and do that. And it's teaching me in this, you know, single phase that I'm in.

So I think studying her instead of being jealous of her, which is kind of how, you know, I am in my career with other comedians. When I started stand up, I wasn't like, she's doing, I called all of the girls that were doing stand up. I was like, y'all are bomb, y'all are killing it, help me. Like, I need help, I'm not, I don't know everything,

I'm a student, so you kind of, you know, roll that over into your friendship. Like, she motivates me. Like, I'm like, I want to be that type of mom. I want to be that type of wife. And vice versa, like, I didn't know anything about like the entrepreneurial side. And like,, like I didn't know anything about like the entrepreneurial side. And like really like owning my own stuff and you know that type of thing and be it's so good at it

and like very intentional about her work and she works really hard and she never stops working. And so it you know the things that we were different and lacking in each other, we saw like, okay, I can learn from you. You can learn from me. And that's just how we go through our relationship. And we know our roles in our friendship. Like I know my role, she knows her role. I do me, she does her, we make space,

and allow space for us to do our own, you know, like walking our own purpose in our own lane. And we find how we can like merge those things together. It makes a big, great purpose. Yeah. And wherever you're lacking, it's not necessarily like necessarily a lack, but that is the opportunity for evolution for you. If you see something in her that you don't have, all right, then go, you need a boss up.

You need to fix this part of you. You need to grow this part of you. You need to evolve this part of you. So if there's something that you're lacking, you can really learn from your friend. Yeah. You know what? One of the things that makes social media so challenging

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Just go to shipstation.com, click on the microphone at the top of the page and type Evolve. Okay, so you use the word studying and I feel like Megan you spoke to that as well just being exposed to be some owns mindset and her mentality as it relates to entrepreneurship. I feel like both of you have to possess a certain level of wholeness in order to not see your friends successes as a reflection of an area where you are deficient and to not be jealous. Can you tell me, how do you discover wholeness in friendship and has there ever been a moment where you did feel jealous and like how did you bring that back inwards as opposed to becoming like the passive aggressive, nice, nasty friends, which I think a lot of us have,

like some of us have friends for 20 years, but we not like friends friends. We just like have known each other for a long time. What type of self work have you done to become whole enough to say her win doesn't mean I failed. And I can study her without feeling like I'm behind the ball. Yeah, I don't think the word is jealous, but I've definitely seen things in Megan where I'm like,

I'm gonna say damn, I don't know what it is. Excuse me, I don't say damn like I'm forward. It will be okay. I want one thing I say sure is like, I don't think this is gonna be the first time they ever heard the cuss word. So, like, you know, be yourself. I am doing so good. I'm professional. But it's like, dang, I want to be like that.

Like I've seen stuff in her, it makes you look inward to be like, I need to work on that. You're either going to choose to work on it or you're constantly going to be like, I need to work on that. You're either gonna choose to work on it or you're constantly gonna be like, that not upsets me, but it's like, you're gonna feel like, dang, like, I suck. You know what I mean? If you see something so beautiful in somebody from her depth to her relationship with God,

she has drawn me so close to God. I've always had a relationship with him, but it's gotten stronger because of her. I see things in her that I'm like, okay, if I need to fix that, I have to do the self-work and become better in that area. So is he gonna push you to be jealous or is gonna push you to be a better person?

You have that choice. Yeah, I think it's important to know that, I'm really big on everything being connected, and your win is my win. And if I love you, your win is my win. And me pouring into you is also me pouring into myself because it all comes back around. You know what I mean? I truly believe that.

I believe like your like be success is what got us to our podcast like her being able to do what she did and that time of separation was she was chasing her career. And I was being a mom and a wife. It put us both in positions to gain the things that God needed us to gain in order to be where we are right now doing this podcast. What she has and what she, like the light that she walks in and the light that I walk in, when you bring that in,

those two things together, the impact is so much great. And we don't resent each other for how we maneuver or the things that we're better at or stronger at. We really use those things to produce something bigger, and bigger impact. And building your confidence in your strengths, like focus on your strengths.

We don't have to be great at the same thing. Yes, things that she is great at motivates me to, you know, be better in that area, but I focus on my strengths. I know there's things that I, Megan needs to do that, you know, and being confident in your strengths and focusing on those will just help your confidence. Yeah.

That's so good. I could have chills when just hearing you all speak because I feel like this is where friendships get fractured. I've had so many friendships and I've got some valuable friendships that I've had for 20 years. I don't think that we are, maybe we're not as close as you all are

because you guys are giving strong sisterhood vibes. I'm not very sure. We do the work, not as close as you are because you guys are giving strong sisterhood vibes. We do the work, but literally, this is really random. But last night I was listening to what? No, I was listening to an audio and it's supposed to be for you to like manifest your soulmate. And literally I fell into a deep sleep. It's like this soulmate manifestation. And the whole time I'm like, Megan is my so-made.

Like, you were like, you believe it? So-makes don't have to be just like a romantic thing. Like, I really do believe that God, like, and when he made, Braille, and he had Megan in mind. But he made Megan, he had Braille in mind. And he knew what was gonna happen. Like he knew that all that time went past that we didn't speak, and then at the right moment,

for whatever reason, God laid it on her heart to take, send me a message, and then all these moments, all these divine moments that God has orchestrated for us to be right to this point. To this point, where now we're getting messages like, thank you for your podcast. If you guys didn't say this, I don't know if I would have made it another day,

or I forgave somebody, or I'm in a relationship. And it's like all of the things that have occurred in 20 years of friendship led to that. You know what I mean? And so it's like, well that's why we laugh around. We always joke around, we're like, she's my soul mate. Because we really do believe that like, it's purposeful. Yeah.

Okay, so that, I think that is how we define friendship. Is when friendship has been brought together by God, there's purpose connected to it. You don't have to dim your light. As a matter of fact, my light can help you in the areas where your light may be dim to help you continue to just cultivate that light and make it brighter. I think friendship at the end of the day when it is pure, when it is about honoring the other person who was connected to that friendship, that it's about honor and growth and it seems

like you all have figured that out. So I have to ask, be you said that Megan brought you closer to God. And I want to talk about faith and friendship and really seeing your friends go through challenging seasons, heart breaks, depressions, devastations, the twist and turns that often isolate us and yet in friendship has an opportunity to allow us to invite someone into that season. How has the faith that you all possess helped you to support your sister in dark seasons? That's just the foundation. Like, even we have our first live show next week, Megan put in the group chat. She's like, it's on my heart, you guys, we need to fast.

Like that's how Megan moves. Like, me and God are tight. Like I can call them with feet on, but me and God be kicking me. Like you're not gonna be kicking me. You're like God, you know me and God tight, but it's like, dang, you like know him, know him. You know, like he really brings me close to him.

And I told her that the other day, we after one of my shows, we just sat in the car, we wiped our farm makeup, we don't go nowhere, we don't go out, we literally sit in the car and talk, we talked about God for three hours. And, you know, that's just the foundation of, it should be the foundation of any relationship, not just a friendship, whether it's a parent, a friend, a child, a mom, a dad, that is the foundation to our relationship. So when we are lost or we were confused or we lose a little bit of faith or hope, we know, go back to the basics, go back to the book, go back to what God said, you know. And we both, like, we both went through really hard time.

Well, she went through a really rough time in 2020, like the darkest season of her life. I went through, like, the darkest season of my life last year in 2021 and we were just able to speak into each other and speak life into each other and be like, remember, like the biggest thing I've always tell her is like, what is the truth? And remember what the truth is. Remember what God says.

Don't worry about how you feel. How you feel is it's temporary. It's not, you cannot, that your feelings should be considered, but they should never be the final decision maker. Your feelings are your feelings, right? And they will come and go. And they should be considered. But what is the truth?

What's the truth is? The truth is that God has called you. The truth is that you have a purpose. The truth is that you're the head and not the tail. Like we start speaking that into each other. And I was able to do that for her in 2020. And then she was able to do that right back for me. Right after.

And 2021. And that's how you know, like your friendship is like solid. And it only could be solid. Like that if God was, if, you know, if God could be the foundation, that's the only way. The only way, it's the only way. Okay, so I hate to interrupt all of this good conversation, but I wanted you to know that I want to talk to you too.

I want to hear your story. I want to hear your thoughts and opinions. You can send me your application, your video, to be a co-host to podcastatwomenevolved.com. Let me know what it is you want to talk about. Why it's important to you that you be on the podcast. Maybe you like, girl, I am not gonna be on anybody's podcast. I don't do talking to people.

First of all, this is a sign, overcome yourself. But if not, you can send me an advice question. Podcast at womanevolved.com. Okay, let's get back to the podcast. So like, how do you practice this level of vulnerability and friendship? Because there's one thing to know someone for a long time. There's another thing to be like, this is my branch girl.

We can kick it. We can pee pee. But when I'm depressed, my back is against the wall. How do you open up your mouth to another woman to say, I need you to pray for me or I'm hurting. I know it's cultivated over time, but maybe you can take us back to the first time you ever had to trust her with your vulnerability. What was that like?

I'm trying to be a no. The first time you trusted me with your vulnerability. Well, I'll say... I'll say... It was in our childhood. Yeah, I mean, I think when you're a child and like, when you're younger, you have friends, but then like you always had that one friend that like came over the most, or you could say the night

at their house or they could say the night at your house. So we were able to see each other's lives in that way. And I think because we've known each other for so long, I know her parents, she knows my parents, we know each other's family, it's easier to be vulnerable, but I will say, that was rough for us last year with me being vulnerable because I'm more of the friend that's like, I like to take care of everybody.

She's gonna take care of everyone else before I say it. I always put myself last. And she, it was a challenge in our relationship for me not to say, hey, I'm struggling, I need you. And she, you know, it was a challenge in our relationship for me not to say, hey, I'm struggling, I need you, I need something or whatever, it was really hard for me to do that. And I think when she showed up for me, it was my birthday.

And she was like, I don't care, because I was really like really bad, I was like really depressed. And she was like, I'm out care, because I was really like really bad. I was like really depressed and she was like, I'm out here, like I'm not gonna leave. I'm out in the driveway. If you wanna talk, you know, we can talk but I'm just not gonna leave, like I'm here. Like whenever you wanna come outside, we can walk,

we can, whatever, but I'm just not gonna leave. I'll stay out here until you're ready. And like that level of like, I love you enough to invade your space and do whatever it takes. So that you to be okay. And when I love you and that you're going to be okay and that we're going to get this together, it really helped unlock and kind of shed a lot of that pride.

Because I feel like a lot of it could be pride, like not wanting to be vulnerable. It's like a prideful thing. And so I think I've been, I think I've been better. 100%. That was going to be a great job. I'm like, yeah, yeah. Did that restructure their friendship? Like now are you more comfortable saying that? And I wonder if that's the key to as invading our strong friends bubble.

Yeah. That's always different to be like, you know what? No, this time I'm gonna be here for you. Instead of saying things like, let me know if you need something. Like, I'm here. What's up? Yeah, it's pull up. It's I'm here.

It's because your strong friend is never gonna say, I need you or I'm struggling. They're never gonna say that because there's a pride aspect to it, but there's also this thing of like, I don't wanna be a victim to anything. And I know that's how I am. I'm like, I have the, like my mom always taught me to be self-aware and you're in control of your own emotions.

And I just felt like I can take care of it myself. I can do this, whatever. But God didn't create us to be alone. You know what I'm saying? He created us to commune and be with each other. And I need her. And just like she needs me in ways, you know. And so yeah, with you have a strong friend, go.

Like pull up on this. Pull up. Hey, I'm here. I'm here. I'm here. I love you. Whatever is happening, just know that I love you. Whatever you're going through, I love you.

I'm coming over tonight. Let's do lunch. I already got the reservations. I'm coming over tonight. Let's do lunch. I already got the reservations and kicking you up. I sent the Uber. Whatever. Just do it. Just whatever you would do for a romantic partner. Like, yeah.

I like if I had a boyfriend, I would do that for him. Like, why are we not doing that for our platonic relationships, you know? So. Okay, so I have a question. So we talked about seeing each other when we were like in difficult seasons and staying connected. Has there ever been something that you have gone through that you could not share

with your best friend? Like this one's got to stay between me and God and did it feel like a betrayal to the friendship or like this one is for Megan. Maybe it's like, I got to keep this between me and my husband. Like has there ever been something that you could not share with your best friend and how did you navigate that? Or maybe something you shouldn't have shared with your best friend

cause then they was rolling their eyes at your boyfriend. So, that gets pretty good at that. Like even if she thinks I shouldn't be dating somebody, she'd be like, okay, you like them today, we gon' see. And you know, she lets her work fast. Go to my own demise, but not yet. But I wouldn't be surprised if that ever came up in life.

I don't think it's like a secret. I mean, there are certain things that you're allowed to go through with just you and God. You know, I feel like that is allowed, but I haven't personally experienced that yet. Yeah, I think, I don't think there's, it's been anything that I couldn't, or that I haven't sold her

I think that it was about when would God allowed me to open up about certain things I think sometimes he'll take us through seasons where it does just need to be you and hand where he has locked my tongue Yeah, I'm in like you need to shut up. Yeah, this is between me and you and so he's able to work out some things And then I've been like girl, let me tell you what I was feeling two years ago. Jesus, let me tell you what was really going on there. But I do believe that like you do there are everything isn't supposed to be shared off like rip you know what I mean I feel like some things need to be between you and God and allow him to develop and process that before you share.

Well actually now that you say that there was something that um... I should look at you. That's a good one. That's a high mood. We're all in the same relationship. See, like, oh, mute it. I hate when she does that. She always leaves me feel like there's a surprise coming.

No, I told you there was something I've been going through internally recently. Oh, okay. But I haven't, I expressed to her that I'm going to tell her one day, but I'm trying to figure out, you know, what's going on. And I've been journaling about it, I've been self-aware about it, I've been talking about it, I've got a new therapist, a life coach, I've talked about it with her, but it's something that I'm already planning to share with her.

I'm just going through process first. Now a word from our sponsor, BetterHelp. BetterHelp is customized online therapy that offers video, phone, and even live chat sessions with your therapist, so you don't have to see anyone on camera if you don't want to. It's much more affordable than in-person therapy, and you can be matched with a therapist in hours. Our listeners get 10% off their first month at BetterHelp.com slash Evolve.

That's better, H-E-L-P.com slash Evolve. I love that we're becoming more and more open to giving therapy a shot. Not only is it a form of self-care for me, the tools that I gained from therapy also show up in my relationships with others. For instance, instead of allowing myself to get burned out for my parenting responsibilities, through therapy I'm able to better communicate with my children and my husband about what I need in any given moment so that I'm not running on fumes or becoming irritable and taking

my frustrations out on others. Therapy is worth it and better help is a great place to start. Okay, so I'm blown because like this friendship, you don't feel entitled to one another because that's the other thing with these besties relationships. Sometimes we feel entitled to know every single thing. Like why you didn't tell me that was happening instead of giving that person space and you all have found a way to communicate that there is something there right because

in a friendship you can feel when your girl is off balance but to acknowledge like there is something taking place within me and when I'm ready I'm going to share without that feeling like rejection on the other side that takes a lot of maturity. Yeah, it takes a lot of growth and it takes a lot of communication. Yeah. I think, and I said this in the last, I don't remember what episode it was, but I'm like, relationships fall apart because people stop talking. You have to keep that line of communication open.

If you're feeling something, maybe you can't articulate it. Maybe God hasn't allowed you to speak on it yet, but being like, be said, hey, I'm going through something and I'm actually excited to share it with you. I just am not through process. And there's trust there. I trust her. I trust that she's not ever going to keep something from me with ill intent.

Okay, so I want to know what do you all, what inspires you the most about your friend? Like what about her life and personality brings you the most inspiration? Don't. If she licks me, I'm good. She's, we'll have it on camera and we'll make a clip out of it.

It'll be great. It'll be great for YouTube. May not be great for you, Megan, but it'll be great for us on YouTube. Ever great for you, Megan, but it'll be great for us on YouTube. Ever great for me, but she does it all the time. I think the way she articulates herself, Megan is the most deep person I have ever met in my life and the way she explains things and brings things

so that people can understand her mindset, what she's thinking, just the way she articulates herself from her analogies to her stories. Or I'm like, no, like my answer will be like, yeah, her answer will be like, yes, but when you see that, you know, it's very like, it helps you understand.

And I really, really love that about her, like her articulation and her expression. Yeah, you're really deep. Okay. I say it all the time, I love how B is like, she lives her life unabashedly. Like she's very just like, I am who I am. I'm not, she's not afraid to embarrass herself. She's not afraid of what people think about her. Like she truly walks in her truth, truly. Like the most authentic person that I feel like I've ever met and especially with social media with her job,

starting off in that way, she's just always been herself. Like I tell people all the time, I'm like, this is the same girl personality and bubbly and all that stuff that she was when we were 12 years old. And I just love how free she is. Like to just be yourself. Yeah. That is a freedom. There's a lot of people that can't do that that are very like worried about what people think and worry about what they say. And I love that you just like do you like you are free. You are who you are. You're honest. You're truthful.

Like and you present yourself that way. And it's just very, very refreshing and admirable. Like I really love that about her. It's funny because as you guys were talking, I'm like, I wonder if part of what makes friendship have longevity is being connected to someone who represents a light that you're still learning to discover within yourself or to honor within yourself. So maybe her articulation is a reflection of an area where you feel like you're developing and growing and the same thing for you, Megan, with her freedom

and just being open. Like you represent who I wanna become or what God is doing as he's cultivated in my life. That's what it seems like. That's exactly like a piece of what I've been going through. And I can't wait to share it, but that's exactly it. Yeah. My therapist talks about shadows and she's always saying that like there's one thing to make an observation about someone and there's another thing to have a reaction to someone's presence and your reaction to their presence is an indication of something that's

taken place inside of you and it seems like you guys are one another shadows in many ways. Yeah literally literally we literally balance each other in such a good way. And it's a God thing for sure. Yeah. Man, that's, I mean, I'm just processing out loud. But I think that that is what makes like womanhood and sisterhood so special is when God assigns a woman to your life, she has access to the seed of what God is developing inside of you. And because she has access to that seed,

she can either kill it or nurture it. And I feel like so many of us have been wounded by our friendships with women because they saw the seed and exploited it. They uprooted it. They didn't take care of it. But a woman who can nurture another woman's seed is one not intimidated by the seed,

but also sees it as an opportunity for her to grow as well. And yeah, you guys have something very special. In any women that are listening to this, I have been hurt by women. Yeah. I have been, you know, backstabbed by women, I've been lied to by women, I've been played by, you know, my friend, female friends, but that did not change my character. Do not let that situation change your character

and become a horrible woman. You know, you keep growing, evolving, and finding women that you can trust, that you can love, that you can pour into, that will pour back into you, that will be honest with you, that will love you back, because they are out there.

I'm not gonna sell, all my friendships haven't been great. You know, especially in my younger years, now I have like four friends, but when I was trying, not trying friendships haven't been great, you know, especially in my younger years, now I have like four friends. But when I was trying to, not trying to be friends with everybody, but that's just my personality. Like I was, I had, oh yeah, everybody's my friend, everybody's not your friend, and that's okay.

You know, that's okay. You have your going out, friends, your house, friends, whatever. But don't let, you know, a horrible encounter with a woman make you not ever trust another woman because there are women out there that will be great friends to you. That's so good because some of us like listen, I'll never, I'll never be friends again and we miss out on an opportunity to grow. Okay, so one more friendship question. What?

Be Simone, Megan. question. What be Simone Megan? Like what is your job as it relates to protecting your friend from a part of her personality that the world is trying to take advantage of or people have a tendency to take advantage of? Because I feel like that's also what sisters do. It was like you too nice. Let me talk to them or you give too much like what are you protecting her from? That's definitely me. What are you protecting her from? That's definitely me. Yeah, that's hard for me. I think me for you is more like now

that you're in the not a limelight. I'm like, don't bully her on the internet. Like, he comments, Jesus. I'm trying to get to the comments for she doesn't delete him in blood. She's very cute on it. Yeah, I'm on it. Because Megan will get in her head and I'm like,

no, there's no delete delete delete. They don't know us. They don't know us. You know, so I'm on it because Megan will get in her head and I'm like no, there's no delete delete delete They don't know us. They don't know it. You know, so I'm just now protecting you from like that Yeah, she right now what the industry is like and so But she's already been through it. She knows like and she knows me so she knows how to navigate me through this Without losing my marbles But for me, I'm just naturally, I'm a very protective person. And it was challenging. Like when I first moved here, I wanted to protect her from something, and it was really hard because she wasn't open, I guess, to be protected from that. And I just had to trust God. And when the timing was right, like it happened.

But I am very like, you're too nice before I see you. Yeah, like you need to, you're being a little bit too, you know, giving or whatever. I try to be like, you know, the reasonable, I try to give her options. Like, okay, let's think this through. What do you think about that? What do you think about my-

When the hands start going, is that when you know you're in trouble? Hi! Hi! If I see this, I know. She is the she-a-mess on that. I'm not having about that. But, yeah, we protect each other in different ways. And I think as we evolve, we find new ways to protect each other,

as we grow. Yeah. Yeah. Becoming healthy and understanding the why behind certain food choices is an approach that I think we all need. Thanks to Noom, Wade's cognitive approach, myself and many others are regaining our confidence and our ability to be more mindful of our habits while aiming to build long-term patterns

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I think you'll love how easy it is to use their app to track your progress and the flexibility of the no new weight program. Stop waiting and sign up today that's in oom.com slash evolve to start your free trial today. Okay, we have an advice question, so we're going to get in somebody else's business. It says, hello Sarah, let me start by saying that I've been listening to woman evolve and I'm so grateful for you and all of your insight. You're getting me through a transitional period in my life to thank you. I need advice on a subject and I'm really hoping you can help.

So I met a guy in 2019 and to make a long story short, we broke it off and rekindled things last year. He's a wonderful man with a lot to offer, a reflection of my ideal husband, honestly. However, he suffers from severe anxiety and depression. I believe he may be bipolar and only communicated the anxiety and depression to me. I was willing to stay to help him through this, but he stated that he needs a lot of solitude, too much for me to bear at times seeing that I crave closeness. He also said that at this point, he cannot learn to love himself and love me simultaneously, and that I don't deserve

the ups and downs that come with his mental illness. Every time I've spoken to God about this man, it ended in a breakup. How do I know if God is removing someone temporarily so that we can both take time to heal ourselves and come together better than ever or if this is something I need to release permanently? How can mental health affect how someone displays love? Based on our feelings for each other, should I remain open to the possibility of this man returning to me after he heals?

Or is God telling me to run? I really need clarity dissecting what's going on. What's up with my name? She didn't give her name. She didn't give her name. We can call up and pronounce. And I'm not sure if she did. name. She didn't give her name. Call up and press.

And then we'll see it. Man, that was such a loaded, there are many parts to that. I will say, as a person who struggles with bipolar depression, I think it is very hard to be in a relationship. It can be very hard to be in a relationship. It can be very hard to be in a relationship with somebody who battles with their mental health, especially if you're still trying, if that person is still trying to find their way through that. I think it's very difficult. I would say for her, she was like, what should I break up with him is this God telling me to run.

I think that you need to be a whole person. I think that you need to take time and become a whole person. You shouldn't like, can crave closeness and all that and that's fine. And I think if that's what you need, then God will bring somebody that will, you know will compliment that or somebody that will be okay with that. I think now that they're broken up, in my opinion, I'm like, be broken up and heal and have a, you know, your relationship with God. And if it comes back, then it comes back and you'll know it because it'd be the right timing because you've taken that time to submit your life to God and like take that time and build your relationship with God.

And for that, for that guy, her ex, I feel like that's very admirable that he's like, I can't love you and try to figure out how to love me right now. And I don't want you to wait for, you know, wait for me or whatever. I think if he's acknowledging that, that is what you need to, that is the truth. And you need to take that and you need to, you know, kind of just do your own thing. And I will say on the opposite end, you know, I'm her best friend. This is not a romantic relationship, but even a platonic relationship, being best friends with somebody who has bipolar depression and goes through anxiety and All of those mental battles having grace and I'm choosing to be in this relationship I this is a lifetime thing. We're never gonna be like we're not friends no more

We're life partners. We know we're gonna be friends forever Choosing to learn about it. I've had times where I've Google did and I've looked it up And I've tried to understand from her point of view. I don't know everything that she is battling mentally and internally and trying to have grace and understanding and loving her through it and not taking everything personal. She doesn't want to talk, it has nothing to do with me. She doesn't, she doesn't want to be, okay, cool, giving her, all right, like we said, okay, give me two days, give me three days, on that fourth day, I'm pulling up though.

It's a balance between letting that person have their space and having grace and learning about, you know, I'm not sure if you have, but learn about what he's telling you he has. Research it. If he can't articulate it, look it up. It is not something that is easy to deal with. And when you love somebody, you try to, you know, work through it and love them through it. Yeah. That's so good. I was just thinking because I think one, I think in our society and culture that mental health has become more prominent in which we're assessing

our mental health and also receiving more diagnosis than we have in the past, which means to meet someone who suffers with anxiety, depression, bipolar, is probably going to be more easy than it was years ago. It doesn't mean that it wasn't prevalent. It's just as we pursue mental health that we're going to be more and more exposed to it. And I think for someone who is struggling with mental health illness, that we have to be honest about really needing a revelation about the illness for ourselves. And that's what I feel like if he's saying to you and this letter is that he doesn't have a revelation

about the illness that will allow him to engage in a relationship. Because if he gets a revelation about his mental health illness, what he will know is that he is still worthy of love, that he can still have intimacy, that he can still create connection, that it doesn't devalue him

or make him less valuable in any way. So he can receive the love that you have to offer him. But until he has a revelation about who he is, apart from this mental health illness, about the love that he is deserving of, apart from the mental health illness, then you're going to continue to try and pour love into someone who doesn't have a bucket for you

to pour that love into. I'm going to go on. And so I do think, to be's point, to take some time to really understand it so that as you're coming to a place of closure, you're able to stay within yourself. Okay, so that's why things were strained or that's why things were like this and that's why I triggered him. But also to study it with the knowledge of like, now I'm moving forward with my life with a better understanding of what it's like to be a person who has this

illness while they're walking in the world and engaging with others. And I think that's the best gift you can give yourself and to him as well. Absolutely. I love that. I 100% agree with that. I love that. Megan, thank you for sharing your story with us because I think that vulnerability is what at the end of the day allows us to feel safe in our relationships. And so thank you for creating this opportunity to speak with both of you all about friendship and sisterhood. It's an honor. Because it's an honor.

Such an honor. Thank you so much. You told me that. And I was like, no way. We were like, we were super excited. We're excited that you're going to be in Atlanta. So excited. Yeah.

I'll come. Thank you. And I think we're trying to see. Atlanta. So excited. Yeah. Oh, thank you. And I think we're trying to see. I'm taking a red eye ticket there, so I don't know if we all on podcast. But I was going to see if maybe I could come and see you while in September to do it in person. If it has to be in person, I'll be in Atlanta in September.

So I'd love to do it then. Every night, take your time. There's no rush. We have forever. I love that. Thank you. Well, thank you, you guys take care. Thank you.

Bye. Bye. Thank you, B. Simone and Megan, for the giggles and gems on today's podcast. You too have a gift that I hope continues to manifest and inspire us all. What a time to be a gift that I hope continues to manifest and inspire us all. What a time to be a co-host. You need to get in on this time. You get to help another woman with the lessons you've learned and expose a little bit of your

ease. It's really an offer you can't refuse. If you're down with the get down, hit my inbox at podcastatwomanevolve.com with a one to two minute video about why you should be my next co-host or you can send me an advice question that you'd like for me to answer. you