Woman Evolve with Sarah Jakes Roberts - Placing Our Hope in God w/ Kirsten Bennett

Episode Date: May 10, 2023

God can't bless you for tend to be or who you compare yourself to. He can only bless you and the lane that was created for you. I feel that for somebody. You don't need no itch, it's a unique boundary. What? I don't need your lights, I don't need your elevation. All I need is a God fighting for me that's there for all things. All things, all things.

Child. Okay, so I don't know if you guys are Bible scholars, but just in case you aren't, I want to tell you a little bit of a story. I'm probably going to jack it up so you're going to need to become a Bible scholar to actually get it right. But there's a story in the Bible about two sisters Martha and Mary and Martha is serving Jesus. Jesus is in their home and she's doing all of these things around the house but Mary is seated on the floor by Jesus. She's worshipping. She's connecting because she's in the presence of

Jesus. Martha gets a big man. She walks over to Jesus. I aren't she gonna do something about this? She needs to be up. She needs to be helping. And Jesus is like, you know what? She has chosen the good thing which cannot be taken away from her. In that moment, we learn a lot about taking matters into our own hands and showing up in a way that we think we should versus trusting what's happening in the moment

may dictate a different version of who we are. It's no wonder that just moments later in the text, we see that Martha and Mary are dealing with the loss of their brother Lazarus. And in this moment, Martha again comes charging up to Jesus, letting him know that had you been here, their brother would not have died. She's again at a crossroads where she's having to choose between taking matters in her

own hand or just trusting God. Of course, many of us know that Jesus ultimately goes on to raise her brother from the dead. He comes back to life, not just resurrecting his life, but also resurrecting Martha's trust, that even though things may not look the way that she anticipated, even though her hands may be frozen and there's nothing left for her to do, that when she's not working, that God still has options. Staying open to trusting God when life is pivoting, twisting, and turning on us can be quite the challenge.

My husband and I were recently in a similar situation. I felt like our hands were tied, but we kept on trusting God, kept on moving, doing what we could with what was available to us and recognizing that when that thing we were praying for it came through, it had nothing to do with us and everything to do with what God was doing behind the scenes.

You're listening to this right now and maybe you feel that way. You're trying to stay open to trusting God, but you're also wondering, God, are you doing anything behind the scenes? How are you bringing things together? How are you making this work together for my good? Well, you are not alone. Did you hear that? You are not in it on your own.

So many of us know what it's like to have to trust God while also making some moves or no moves and being sensitive from day to day to which type of day it's going to be. Is it a no-moved day or a some-moved day? That only happens through deep prayer and meditation and also receiving a word from unexpected places. That's exactly what's going to happen today. I believe that there is a word from an unexpected place that you're going to receive on today's podcast.

Today joining me is Kirsten Bennett. She is a mother, she's a wife, she's an entrepreneur, she has an incredible story and her life has had some unexpected twists and turns as a matter of fact, there was an incredible story and her life has had some unexpected twists and turns. As a matter of fact, there was an unexpected twist and turn that almost convinced her to not do today's podcast, but she pushed through and she trusted God that she was going to be at the right space at the right time. For her to be who she's called to be, but also for you to receive this word. So open your ears, open your heart. I believe God's got a word for you. And I cannot delay any longer.

Let's get into it. You're gonna be blessed. Hey. Hi. How are you? I'm doing good. How are you? I'm doing great.

Thank you for taking the time to talk to me. Of course. I feel like I should call you little mismind your business. Cause like one thing you do is they off the radar. So I appreciate you. I try my best. What do you say? Oh, you try your best. Yep. I do. Sometimes that's how you protect your pieces. Just minding your business. I'm right there in that right now trusting God. Yes, in this very

That is what I'm doing. Yes, in this very moment. Okay, so Can you tell when You are at the intersection of like I'm gonna have to trust God versus I'm gonna have to do something. Like, I feel like for me, I find myself in these moments in life where I was like, I could take matters into my own hands or I could just see how things play out and trust God. Me and my husband actually just got out of a season where it's like, you know, we are trying to do everything that we know to do, but things are still like out of our control.

How do you lean into those moments where literally trusting God is not the only option, but you know it's the best option? Well, I feel like the season that I'm in right now has really has called for me to do both. And I've been kind of acting on that, but I think that there's a point where you don't do anything and you just stand still. And that is, that's important too, but I think

when you're peace and your, you know, your environment just depends on what exactly is happening around you. I think it is hard to decide when you do something and when you don't, but I think staying in an indecisive point for too long can also be really dangerous. So I just think that you know, you have a knowing when God is telling you to move and you just have to act on that. And you can, that doesn't mean that, you know, you're losing hope. I think when I start to focus on myself too much and what my situation is, that's when I begin to despair. Feel like I don't know where to go from there. So my, when I look back at like even just previous seasons, like when I was pregnant with my first daughter or just moments where I really felt despair was always me focusing too

much on my situation versus God, and just trusting, even not knowing what the like, walking into the unknown and not knowing what that is. Not taking the focus off of myself always helps in some way, yeah. I love what you were saying about, sometimes you do have to do both. And I love that because especially as Christians sometimes

we're like, I'm just going to trust God. And we allow that to leave us like immobilized. We're now we're not moving at all. But sometimes trusting God is in the move. It's in us making the decision and trusting that whatever the consequences are, whatever the emotions are connected with that decision that God can see me through those moments.

I feel like trusting God is saying, I'm taking my hope out of this outcome that I've been praying for. I'm taking my hope away from the way I think things should be. And I'm placing my hope in God's ability to make all things work together. And so I'm gonna make a decision so I can give God to work with.

Sometimes God can't do anything because we haven't given God anything to work with because we've been in the same circumstance for so long. But it's like, God, I'm going to give you something to work with and it's going to make me vulnerable and it's going to be awkward and maybe it's going to be painful. But at the end of the day, God, I want to give you some material to help me move with. 100%. I agree with that.

And without saying too much on that topic, I just feel that God has me in that place. And listening for every word that I hear is always like, all right, what you gonna do, you gonna move. And even just, I'm in a transition space, even with my kids, I mean, you have kids constantly, your kids are transitioning. So I have a three year old who is in part-time preschool

and she's about to be going to school full time in the fall. And that is new for me because while I am a business owner, I also have been a stay at home on for almost seven years. And well, for seven years going on eight. And now it's a time where I feel the call from God to just do more and be able to be more available to what he's asking me to do. And so I'm gonna have more time.

And while I can pour that time into Bobby, which is my business or working out or whatever it is, I think idle time is the double-split ground. And so I really just, and like, okay, we don't get eight hours, five days a week. What are we gonna do at that time? So I'm really, that's what I've been leaning into and just my own identity because you can get lost

in motherhood in a bit. And I feel like right now I'm really being called out of just this identity of not playing small, but in a way like I feel called tomorrow. And so I'm trying to like lean into what, what does God want to use me for? And who does, what, what name does he call me, especially in this new season in my life?

So that has been something I've been interestingly working through in therapy. It's so funny because I feel like a, I mean, and everyone says this and it sounds cliche, but like it really is true. I think that the beginning of purpose starts with our, with pinpointing our pain, even some of our more initial pains.

And so I'm intrigued by like, what is your story outside of like, who you're connected to? Like I want to know like about who you are as a kid and like what it was like growing up. Like I want to know more about you as a person. Sure. Yeah, so I was born in Houston,

but raised in Chicago. My mom is from Houston, so we have a lot of roots there, but raised in Chicago on the north side, and just always was involved in sports, played sports my whole life, played every sport you can think of, really clung to basketball, and I did that up until high school.

And then I just had this moment, also just a backtrack. My parents were divorced, got divorced when I was seven. And so that was something that I'm addressing now, I think, but it caused a lot of just craziness and dysfunction in my life that I didn't really realize until later. But great parents saw both of them every other day. And then in high school, yeah, I really just had this moment where I was super tomboy and then I got my braces off and I was like, oh, like, hello.

I like, I like what I'm seeing here and I really just, I started modeling and I had this like other vision for my life. I didn't want to play basketball anymore. That was something that I felt not my dad was forcing on to me because I was good at it, but I just felt like I wanted to explore other gifts that I had. And I also started talking to boys and so I feel like, going into college, or I guess at the end of high school, I where I would say was more of my lost period. And I really just was like, I don't wanna play basketball anymore,

but that was something that really grounded me, and I ended up going to college for fashion merchandising and design. And I went to like a few different colleges. Really, I was following my boyfriend's if I think of back on it. Like I had a boyfriend and he used to my starting Houston, I went to DC.

And then I just kind of had a moment where I was like, what am I doing? I need to come back home and like, re-ground myself. And that's when I went to school. And I finished with a bachelor's in psychology. And that has been a passion of mine ever since college. I think I really, I'm still a psych nerd.

I'm really fascinated by human behavior and how it connects to what we do when Artrauma and all of that. And so I graduated with that. And then I ended up after college still kind of lost, like I said, still just like not really grounded in the church. I grew up in church, liturgical dance choir, like you name it at church twice a week my whole life.

And then when I had the option not to do that, I definitely acted on it. And I think it wasn't until I got pregnant with my first that I really come back to Christ in a substantial way and gave my life back to Christ, joined the church, and that came with ups and downs along the way, having a child at 24. And I remember your book, Don't Settle for Safe, was one of my like, that book just means a lot to me. And yeah, and so after that time, I think,

now I'm still like rediscovering who I am. And I think after I had Kenzie, Now, I'm still like rediscovering who I am. And I think after I had Kenzli, I definitely had a period where I, I mean, the person who I was with at the time we separated. And I kind of had this single season that I think really helped me, catapult me to my faith and ground me in where I am now. And so from there, I like was celebrated and I had this whole vision for my life where I was just like, these are my standards and I'm not going to take anything less than that. And so from there, you know, we were found each other again, got married and that has taken us on a journey. And that has taken us on a journey. But I think even now, like, I feel the most hopeful now

than I've been, and it's funny because when they first reached out to me about this, I wasn't in this place, and I was like, why are they asking me to do an episode about hope? And so, it was funny, they were saying that I was gonna be about parenting, and then when she sent me the message again, she's like, oh no, we're still gonna talk about hope. And I was like, okay, God really just wants

to keep me to talk on how I feel right now and what and what, you know, what he's doing in my life. And so I just think right now I'm in a place where I'm peeling back the layers of my effects of my childhood and how that's affected me, my brokenness and who I am rooted in God, but also who I am besides being a wife, besides being a mother, like who is Kirsten? And how can I use my gifts to serve God? And so that's really like the firm place I am right now in my life. And I'm just really optimistic for the future. I don't know who this is for, but stay off Beyonce's internet self-diagnosing your symptoms

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Go to ZockDock.com slash Wamen Evolve and download the ZockDock app for free. Then find and book a top rated doctor today. Now most people refuse to peel back the layers of what's happened to them. They don't want to go back to the pain. They don't want to address the trauma because they think it will make them feel that opposite of hopeful. And yet, you're telling me that you feel hopeful, even though you're undergoing this process. So what is it about going through this process, revisiting probably some painful memories, some complicated or buried experiences.

How did that lead you to a place of hope? Truthfully, I can't take responsibility for the hope that I have. I think in, like, when I first started to be like, okay, I don't want to spend my therapy talking about things that other people are doing to me. And when she would ask me questions about myself, I would deflect. And she would, she pointed that out to me. And she's like, why do you keep deflecting?

Well, whenever I ask you something about you, specifically, you tell stories about other people. And I just really sat with that. And I was like, I'm obsessed with it now. I'm like, why am I like this? What, what's wrong? Like, I need to like address that. And so that has been painful, honestly.

But I think the reason that I have hope is because I've been able to say, or I've been able to be obedient. I feel like I'm doing what God has asked me to do in that, and that comes in a lot of different forms. But, you know, leaning into him, being in a community with believers, praying weekly with, you know leaning into him being in a community with believers praying weekly with with you know sisters that I truly trust and like adore and and encourage me um not letting sin grieve or like distance my relationship with God like of course i'm i'm 30 at one i like to go out and have fun but i think in a season this, I was really numbing and like running from my pain.

And so now I've just been sitting right in it. And that was very hard for a while, but I think right now I'm like, I think I'm starting to see the effects of when you actually just trust God instead of trusting your own circumstance. And that's not saying every day is easy and I don't cry and I don't have hard moments. But like I said, it's not my, I'm not responsible for the hope that I have. I feel like it's just God's promise to me that if I do what he's asking of me, I will give you hope.

It's a gift from the Holy Spirit. And so I feel like I'm just experiencing that and I'm really grateful for that. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. I believe that journaling is a safe place for authentic self discovery. No wonder years ago when I created a blog, I began to learn new things about myself, writing and connecting with women was life changing for me. The experience was heavy, yet

liberating. It opened me up The experience was heavy yet, liberating. It opened me up to a world of opportunity. Getting to know our true selves takes time as we're constantly evolving. I've personally found therapy to be an effective tool for deepening the relationship I have with myself. Therapy can benefit anyone. It unlocks authenticity and empowers individuals to be the best version of themselves.

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Since support is just a click away, discover your potential with better health. Visit betterhelp.com slash evolve today to get 10% off your first month. That's betterhelp. H-E-L-P dot com slash evolve. When you said that about numbing, I totally resonated with that. And I think part of the reason why, no matter how painful it is to peel back, you know, the layers of our past and the layers of our identity that's made us who we are, the reason

why we do it is because it allows us to feel again. And it only takes the undoing to really recognize how much we have become like almost robots or machines or disconnected from what it means to like really live from our soul and to live fully and vibrantly alive. And so yes, it is painful. But then joy is that much more joyful because you allowed yourself to experience that pain.

And I think that's part of the hope that we receive when we begin to go to therapy, when we begin to lay our lives out before the Lord is like, God, I wanna come fully alive so that I can bring all of my strength, creativity, and innovation into whatever it is that you have for me. Absolutely, absolutely. And I think also I just, I'm so, what's the word?

I must be anointed, I don't know, but I get so convicted. Like when I do things that, and I'm not gonna talk in hyperburelism, just like if I go out and get drunk and I black out, the next day I'm literally depressed. You know what I mean? Like I think I feel that so deeply because I know that God has a higher calling for me.

And so it's just like not to say that those aren't things that end up happening sometimes. I feel like if when I'm too focused on the fun part or the pleasures part of life and not to say that you can't have fun and enjoy life That's not what I'm saying, but I think you understand what I mean of just like certain things Greed the Holy Spirit and you feel that deep inside of you if you're you know if your convictions are just strong And I have really strong convictions and so I Think it's a blessing in a curse You know for a good then you can't do nothing

It's like, you're like, hey, like, y'all, they're doing this. Having a good old job, it's time. And then, yeah, so, I mean, it's really a good thing, but I do still like to go out and dance every now and then. Have you noticed how your own healing journey has affected how you're parenting and how you view your children's story?

Yeah, it's it's almost obsessive because I'm constantly in therapy like oh my goodness, like I just my my daughters they're four years apart but they're both girls and they're in a very unique period where there's just a lot of Like just they just fight a lot sometimes and it's really the older one remembering when it was just her and she's just a lot of, like, just, they just fight a lot sometimes. And it's really the older one remembering when it was just her. And she's just, she's a little, they're both fur goes, I know, like we're not talking about astrology here, but I'm saying like, she's very meticulous. And she wants things done a certain way. And so sometimes when things don't go the way that she wants, it gets, she gets really upset. And so I just parenting her is different than parenting my three-year-old, but also if

my three-year-old is slapping her in the face, that's also what three-year-olds do, but she feels so deeply that it's like a combustion constantly. And I will talk to my therapist about it just how I'm really hard on myself when it comes to my parenting, because I'm like, I don't know my children have to heal for me. I don't want them to be, you know, I don't wanna cause them harm, but I also am human and I get irritated

and I yell sometimes or I, you know, might not say all the right things and that, like, it's something that I always come back and apologize, but I feel like I am a little bit obsessive about it and she's always telling me like you need to have more grace with yourself because you are a great mom and I'm like I know that I think I can be better. So yeah, I think my feeling for sure is I pray going to affect them in a positive way and I think that just both of my parents have abandonment and she's they never

knew their dads and just deep rooted stuff that they've never really addressed. And I think I do feel a weight to break generational cycles in my family. And I know I'm going to. And so I think that that is like, it's only a positive thing. My healing will affect them in a positive way. And they're definitely my wife, because they're two little girls.

They're going to grow up and go through the world a lot similarly than me and they are growing up way different than I grew up. You know, so yeah. When we talk about breaking. Around the way. That's your question. No, it was the perfect way because I think that everyone in for honest recognize areas of our lives where there are generational, cursses generational patterns that we want to break And I think our hope is like we want to break it instantly like we want to snap it in half like a chopstick

But I think sometimes like breaking in generational curses like solving a tree down and it's like action by action decision by decision So much so that you don't realize when it's about to break because you're so busy trying to just keep sawing at it. And so when you think about generational patterns that you want to see stop in your lifetime and never show up in your daughter's lifetime, what are some of those things that you're trusting got to break?

That's a good question. I guess I feel like it's like it's more of a, this is something that I learned about myself. When I was going to pre-marital counseling, I learned that my family was extremely disconnected versus my spouse. And so what that means was growing up when I was in high school and just before that, I

think just because of our relationship with our stepdad or our proximity to our dad at the time, we, me and my sister were always a constant and we weren't always with our parents. And so at dinner time, throughout high school, middle school, when I think about it, we did it and my mom also worked a lot. So like we didn't eat dinner every day together. We didn't spend a lot of time together. And so during those pivotal years of our lives, we kind of were disconnected from our parents

in the way that you want to kind of feel like, I didn't feel like I can go to my mom about sex or about any of the topics that I probably would save me a lot of years of like my own trauma. I felt like I was either gonna try to hide it and do something wrong or I just couldn't talk to about it or, you know, the people I was getting advice from were probably my age and not someone who could really, and so I think I definitely want to break, and that is a sense of abandonment, not that they did it on purpose, but I definitely want my kids to feel connected

to me and feel like they can come to me with anything and without judgment, without shame. And that is really, I think, difficult to navigate, because you just, you know so many things that could happen. You want the best for your kids, but I'm really leaning into like, how do you keep a bond with your kids and stay connected to them so that they feel open to talk to you about things even if you might not agree with everything that they do or want to do? So pray for me in that realm, because I think the world that we live in, and just high school, the word high school just terrifies me,

because I know what I was doing in high school that my parents had no idea of, and I'm just like, that for me, I think I definitely wanna break the abandonment that has gone in my family. And whether it was knowingly or unknowingly, I just, I don't want my kids to ever feel abandoned. So that's one big one that I'll say.

All about that high school word being scary. My 13 year old starts high school next year. And I am gonna be praying for you because I'm gonna be praying for me. So I'm gonna just grab you and bring you into their per closet. Yeah. Like anything that you have, I will receive because I can relate to the dollar. Right. I mean, we do have multiple kids. I have, we do have multiples of where a blended family, we've got four girls and two boys. And I kind of came in at the latter part of our oldest

daughter's teen years. And so my 13-year-old has got me starting from scratch. And it's been very interesting. And definitely me trusting God, definitely like you, trying to keep lines of communication open. How do we stay bonded, especially with such like a busy schedule and trying to make sure that I'm present. Because I want to make sure that my kids feel supported

and that they have an opportunity to really lean in whenever they need something for me, but it is something that makes me nervous but I try not to project my fears onto them. And so far, she shares a lot of things with me that I would have never shared with my mother like ever. So I think we're doing okay there. You're doing something right. Yeah.

I think so. That's what I told someone I'm either really messing it up or we're doing really good. We don't know. We're just ready to try it. We'll give it 10 years and see. I think part of reversing my own abandonment issues though has come with like me being present for myself and like advocating for myself and using my words. And I think in many ways that has required me to trust God because I have feared that in showing up for myself

that it would change the way that I've shown up for other people. I don't know if you're like me. If you've had abandonment issues and you work super hard to make sure you're there for other people but not as hard to make sure you're there for yourself. And so in trying to reverse that, I've recognized it.

I have to show up for myself first. And that show comes with me saying what has affected me, that comes with me, making space for my own dreams and my own thoughts in the midst of the world that I live in. And so I'm curious, Kirsten, what are some ways that you're showing up for yourself right now? Or need to show up for yourself? Well, let me say, start off by saying, I'm actually the opposite.

Like, I'm not a people-pleaser at all. I really love for the word, no. Like, if it's something that I feel like is just going to be over my capacity, and that's probably a fault of mine because I'm like, nope, no, I'm not going to do that. And so I don't know how that helps my abandonment issues, but I just think for me, boundaries was one of the books that I read, and I think this is also how I've been my whole life.

Boundaries is just like a thing that I cherish, and I know that it helps me to be a better version of myself. So, I think in this season of life, I definitely find time to pour into myself. I think in this season of life, I definitely find time to pour into myself. A lot of that comes with spending time with people who I admire and I feel like add value to my life. Exercising is something that gives me really great joy just because I have an athletic background.

Spending time in the nature, walking outside, getting massages if I need to. I'm a very wellness gal for sure. But I think doing also hard work of therapy is sometimes I don't feel like doing it. I'm an isolator and I can be a very avoidant sometimes. And so I just don't feel like talking about things that are hard sometimes.

And so showing up for myself does look like talking through a lot of my issues in therapy. And yeah, all of those things combined and going to church, like just doing things that I know are going to are going to bring me joy. I feel like podcasting. I listen to your podcast. I listen to one online all the time. I come there whenever I'm in LA. Like I just, I have a lot of things that I enjoy doing that I take time to do when my kids aren't with me or even if they are.

So yeah, I've been, I've been definitely pouring into self-care a lot this season. Okay, well we need your boundary spirit to just like leap over on this, but I was gonna ask you, like if you are really good at boundaries, does that mean like part of your work is like not being so regimented with your boundaries?

Like does that mean vulnerability and opening up and letting people in, it's like, that's part. That cause you, I mean, you don't, I don't, I haven't seen you do a lot of interviews. So is this even part of you being like girl, let me go ahead and be open, get on this podcast. You know, and even just here today, out of all days, that I could do a podcast, I'm just like, lower, if you are so funny, you really are. And it is scary. It's scary to open up. And, but it's also necessary.

Like, I know that my story and a lot of things that I didn't even get to mention today that I feel like just our better left unsaid right now. Like, I feel like that is something that will bless people and God is bringing me through a lot of my experiences so that I can have a testimony. And so I do need to be more open in that space. And I'm working on that and shout out to China

because this is not the first time that she's emailed me. She taught me every time. She does, I'm like, not right now. And so yeah, I'm really proud of myself for following through with this. And just doing it, doing just just do it. Like that's what I'm trying to do. Like fear has paralyzed me a lot.

And my younger life and like when I was kind of not my younger life, I think that's still something that is but trying to like do it scared is like what I've been working on lately. So I guess you're spot on with that. For sure. We didn't know whether or not today was gonna go down. And so I was like, you know, whatever space, whatever you need to process. I was like, I am doing this podcast, don't care. Okay, so I have to, like what made you say, like no,

I'm gonna continue down this path. Because I feel like this is an active resistance against fear, against anxiety, but you buckle down and decided that I'm going to do it. What are you proving to yourself? What are you proving to your doubt or insecurity by showing up anyway? I think that life is just full of like storms and ups and downs and that doesn't

mean like that doesn't change where my foundation is and where it comes from and I feel like that's what I'm here to ultimately. I'm here to give dot glory. And if that's not what I'm doing with this, then I don't there's nothing for me to talk about. Like I just feel like that was really what I'm doing with this, then I don't, there's nothing for me to talk about. Like, I just feel like that was really what I was grounding myself in before I decided to do this. And it was never even something that crossed my mind. Like, I just thought it was like, God, it's funny. Like, even before this, there are things that are happening that nobody knows about. And so I feel like the fact that it happened to be this way, like, I was like, yeah, I'm still going to do it. And I'm'm gonna do it because he's my foundation and he's my grounding point.

And I'm just unmovable in that place right now. And so I think that's really what gave me the courage to just follow through with it. And I can't keep telling China, I'm not gonna be on fire. I was like, I've done that too much time. So I'm trying to be the shot of at the door. Like wait a minute, wait a minute. I was like, nope, I'm too much time. So I've been trying to be the showt of Alive. I've been waiting a minute, waiting a minute. That's right.

I was like, nope, I'm doing it. I'm doing it. Didn't you say you wanted to read more this year? Listen, I'm not minding your business just holding you accountable, but since I get it, adulting is raggedy and life barely gives us enough time to pick a book, let alone read it.

But since y'all are my homegirls, I've done the prep work. Now all you have to do is pull up on the Woman Evolved Book Club. There are two ways to join. With the Woman Evolved Book Club membership, you'll receive a monthly book box that includes your book and a special gift. With the digital content membership, it's giving, bring your own book in any format, audio, digital, hard copy, and come kick it with this. Both memberships include digital reading guides, reflection prompts, a custom playlist, and access to an exclusive Facebook group.

Need I say more? Sign up at womanevolvebookclub.com by May 10th to receive June's book. As a loyal listener, you can save $5 off your first monthly subscription by using promo code Read, that's R-E-A-D. I'm excited to have you join us on this journey and we'll be looking for you in our Facebook community. What woman has been most influential in your life is it relates to you living out your faith in a way that feels authentic to who you are. You are definitely high up there on the list. No, don't pick me. I don't know you.

I'm not going to just, I'm just gonna say, like, you know, you're someone who's like, I'm just meaning you for the first time. So, you're definitely wasn't influenced in my life. I would say my stepmom, she's definitely the closest person to me who I can come to about anything, and she's in my family and

She's always grounded me in my faith and told me God has an anointing on your life And I'm like okay, like let listen to what I'm talking about this and I'm going through you know, and she's just always pulling me to go deeper at like so I would say for sure She's someone who Is just a faith-filled woman who I really looked up to. And yeah, I have two friends right now. I want to say, and Yala and Jessica, who have just been pouring into me, and we've been

just, we have a group track called Pran and Sweat, because we'll be pran and we're sweating. And that is just like what we've been doing for the past, I don't even know, two months. And I look up to them. So shout out to them. They're amazing women, daughters, wives, mothers. Yeah. How long has your stepmom been in your life?

Since I was like 11? Wow. Or 12, and it wasn't always like this. Like I gave her a good old time back then. And I think it definitely was me coming into my own faith for myself and you know navigating life and becoming a mom and a wife that really liked. I could always come to her and feel like she was going to counsel me in the way of God, which is all I need at this point.

And so not all I need, but you know, that's the only type of advice I'm willing to accept at this point. And so, yeah, she's been in my life for a long time. I don't know, how old am I, 31? So maybe 20 years. Wow. Yeah. I have bonus kids.

I'm always intrigued by how the step-parent relationship blossoms and becomes a part of someone's core identity. Yeah, it does. And it both of my step parents, I gave them a hard time. Let's just say when I was younger. So I definitely have compassion for that role and it is not easy, but I think that it can be fruitful if healthy, yeah. What is one thing that you hope that your stepmother knows about the impact that she's had on your life? That it's been positive that she's been a light. She's been someone who I can, you know, see God in just very clearly.

And more than that, she's like a boss. She's like a super-exac. And she just, she makes, she does a lot of things. And she's very like, what's the word? She's very hospitable. That is something that I would love to be more of, because I love to be able to come over, but I also love people to go home.

And so I'm like, she's a very hospitable person. I guess that's not the thing that I want her to know. But I just think that even if I didn't, even if I denied it, I've always seen her as a light. And I've always seen God shining through her. And so I appreciate her obedience Yeah, and finding my dad of course, right? For him finding her I should say

That's good. That's that's it. That's the whole podcast right there. I love what you said about yourself You did it you did it. I'm proud of you. Thank you I appreciate your time and your vulnerability and transparency. Thank you. I'm honestly so honored to be here and it's nice to finally meet you in this very very your day and space. So thank you for having me. Hopefully we get to meet in person soon but just so you know that there are some people when they see things and read things that they leave comments and then other people pray things through and so we just want you know that there are some people when they see things and read things that they leave comments and then other people pray things through and so we just want you know

we're lifting you guys up constantly. For the things we see and don't see, we got you covered. Thank you so much, that means a lot. Okay, take care. Okay, bye. Kirsten, I so enjoyed getting to know more about you and your journey. Thank you so much for sharing space with us, for allowing us to see what is happening behind

your beautiful smile and your beautiful face. There's also a beautiful soul there that I cannot wait for the world to get to know more and more about. Your passion for youth and mental wellness and community is going to resonate with so many women. But I think what will resonate the most is right now the passion that you have for really showing up as all of who God has called you to be. So we're sending you much prayer, much love and much grace for you on this journey. One thing I know for sure is that not only has God entrusted you with it all, but his

hand is in it all. I hope that this podcast blessed you the way that it blessed me. We've got so many incredible stories, so many incredible women who have inspiration to help you continue to evolve. They're going to meet you right where you are, maybe even show you where you once were, and then inspire you to keep growing, keep evolving, and to keep becoming all of who got head in mind when he formed you in your mother's room. I can't wait to see how we grow together next week. Chats soon. Yeah. you