Worlds Beyond Number - From the Fireside: Bag It or Tag It with GM Lou Wilson

Episode Date: March 26, 2024

Lou invented a game called Bag It or Tag it where he generates random characters and the other cast members decide to bag them or tag them. We play it on the Patreon feed from time to time. People like it very much. Here, in its public debut, is the narrative RPG storytelling masterpiece Bag It or Tag It. If you enjoy this (good! smart!) you'd be a fool to not join us by the fireside on our Patreon. This Bag it or Tag It  Public Extravaganza was  Edited and Designed by Kodiak Sandersand Produced by Taylor Moore at Fortunate HorseLudvig Moulin's Le Chasseur et les Fugitifs appears courtesy of Epidemic Sounds.Yasmine Mia Steele's Retro Funk Gameshow appears courtesy of Audio Jungle.Rimsky-Korsakov's Scheherazade appears courtesy of the Public Domain.and of courseThe Bag It or Tag it Theme (feat. Hans Zimmer) appears courtesy of the devil.

Hello, I'm your host Craig Sumgey. This is very untraditional, but a quick word before we start the show about our theme song. Now, many of you at home listening who are familiar with tonight's program, will think you know what's about to happen. I'm going to describe some elaborate way in which I paid our producer Taylor Moore an arm and a leg to create a theme, and that asshole is just going to play crazy frock. That, however, is not the case. Because today's theme song is actually a collaboration. That's right.

I have dedicated a lot of the show's budget to bring in the one, the only, Hans Zimmer to supervise Taylor in the creation of an actual theme song for our game show. So, with that said, it's time to play. Bag it or tag it! Generating characters. Making choices. Bagot or tag it! Hello to our lovely audience at home, and thank you for joining us on today's first ever

live taping of Bagot or Tag It. We're here in beautiful Burbank, California, to see if our PC, our passionate character, will choose to bag it and leave here with one of the MPCs they meet tonight for a romantic trist, or instead tag it, and go home with a fabulous, uncommon, magical item provided by our sponsor,

Temperpetic mattresses. Temperpetic mattresses. Take your next long rest on a temperedic mattress. God damn, it's good sleep. But enough of me. Let's meet today's PC, Abria Iyengar. Hi.

Oh, wow. It's so nice to be here. Oh, Briya, it's so lovely to have you here. What did you tell the audience a little bit about yourself? Who are you? What are you looking for in a romantic partner? Yeah, wow, there's a big audience. I am a sort of long-time dungeon master,

a longtime player, frequent bachelor's. And I'm just looking to, you know, just have a person I can go on adventures with. That's all I want. Oh, audience, your heart goes out to her. I mean, we've all been there, all right? Who's that person you're crawling through the deep, dark with? You know what I'm saying?

Exactly. Well, Abria, lucky for you on the other side of this divider are our potentials MPCs in your quest for romance. I'm going to introduce those NPCs, and once I introduce you, MPCs, if you could just say hello so that our PC can hear your voice. Our first NPC is Bory Metalbreaker. She is a 100-year-old female Hill Dwarf sorcerer. She has short, straight black hair and brown eyes.

She has rugged gray skin. She stands four feet tall with a beefy build. She has an oval, incredibly beautiful face. And she has a beautiful, abstract tattoo on her left hand and a shocking tattoo of an elephant on her left hand. It's shocking, folks. She discreetly worships Moradin, God of Dwarves, creation, smithing protection, metalcraft, and stonework.

She is prone to violence. She can't keep a secret. She always wears a veil, and she collects handkerchiefs. And one more fun fact about her, she's actually a blue dragon. Bori, would you just say hello to O'Brien? Hello. Hello. Next up, we have Thomas Miss Splitter.

He is a 75-year-old male half-orke fighter. He is extremely long, straight, blonde hair and black eyes. He has rugged brown skin. He stands 6'2 and has a regular build. He has a round, unremarkable face with short sideburns. He's severely allergic to cold bolts. Now, he doesn't worship any God.

He is a pacifist. He judges people by their actions and not their words. And he has a pet ferret companion named Mooshy. Also a fun fact about him. he's the head of a local drug dealing circle. Thomas, will you say hello to Abria? Oh, hello, love. Ooh.

Next up, we have Thomas Darkdraft. He is a 53-year-old male half-elk beggar. He has long, straight golden hair and golden eyes. He has silky green skin. He stands 5'3 and has a massive big, He has a diamond-shaped, ordinary-faced, and he has a very small scar on his left arm. He discreetly worships garl glitter-gold, god of gnomes, protection, humor, trickery, and gem-cutting. He's very impatient.

He doesn't care about risks or odds. He shares everything he owns, and he doesn't like change. Also, he's followed day and night by an animated rocking chair. Thomas, if you could say hello. Hi, I actually asked that the girl glitter gold thing not be mentioned in my introduction. Oh, right, Thomas. It was great nice to meet all three of these MPCs. Abrea, you take it away.

You ask these lovely MPCs whatever you'd like, and they will answer you, and I'll only step in when it's time. Great. Well, let's start off with a question for the group. What are all of you looking for in a partner? Bori, why don't we start with you? Well, I have been married before, and so I don't know that that's, for me or not. So that's, that's negotiable, though. I actually want someone to hoard gold with and roll around on that gold and go

and go flying to find virgins to eat. That's a perfect date to me. Oh, wow. That's great. Very nice. I realize now that we have two Thomas's. So we're going to have Thomas one and Thomas two. Which is actually kind of difficult because your bachelor's two and three.

But it's fine. We'll figure it up. Abria, shut up. This is my show. Now, Thomas One. Can you answer Abria's question? Yeah, of course. Sorry to interrupt. I actually would like to go next. I'm very impatient.

Oh, so you think you're Thomas One? I'm Thomas One. I really, look, I only have as much time until this rocking chair gets here, so we better speed it up. We better speed it up. When that chair gets here, nobody's going to like what happens next. All right. Well, then why don't you just go then? Thank you. I'm Thomas One. I'm the new Thomas One. Very impatient. Thank you. But Bachelor number two.

You can call me Thomas One. Okay. Well, let's be clear. He's Bachelor number three and now Thomas number one. Yeah. But now he's since he's going second, is he Bachelor number two? No, because that would involve switching the chairs around as they are on the set. And we're kind of locked in. Bachelor number three is Thomas number one who goes second. I can't be any clearer than that.

Everything you just said is true. I'm keeping up. I think we're doing great. What's your question for me? I want to date you? Oh, yeah. What are you looking for in a partner? Looking for someone who has a thrill for life and a zest for fun.

If they have the ability to dispel animated objects, and destroy them, that would be a big plus. And also, if they, you know, worship, I'm sorry, what was that? Worship Krakow? I must be a little, just one more time. Look, I'm a very giving person. I actually, you know, I share everything that I own,

and I just want to give my life. You know, it's the last thing I haven't given to somebody is my life. so I'm looking for a wonderful life partner and someone to share romance with. And I think that I bring a lot of straight golden hair and silky green skin to any relationship that I'm in. And my face might be ordinary, but my scar is small. Oh. You really got me back there in the end. You will now throw it over to Thomas to Bachelor.

Bachelor to. So that actually, that seeks up nicely. Yeah. Yeah, I'm happy to answer. I mean, truthfully, as a pacifist kind of drug lord, the thing I'm looking for most is a partner, you know, a business partner, someone who's willing to be the violence that I can't, whether it's disemboweling my enemies or, you know, sending threatening letters to Congress people. I'm just looking for someone who can be the kind of the strong fist to my open palm.

You know, as you saw with Thomas, if he wants to be Thomas one, I won't fight him. And you know what? It would be nice if you liked animals, because my pet parrot, Mooshy, needs a mommy. Can you tell me more about the parrot? Yeah, I know we're supposed to be doing a thing with all the group, but please, Thomas, too, please tell me more about your ferret. Oh, so I met Mushi at a ferret rescue that I was dealing drugs to one of the, one of the people who worked there. They had an addiction to heroin, and so I would go there and deliver the heroin and play with the ferrets. And one day, I just made eyes with Mushi.

And, you know, for a while, I thought that maybe there was a human trapped in her that I had a romantic. connection with. But that was the case. She's just a normal ferret. So. Oh. I've gotten a lot of heroines. Oh.

Well, you know, if you need more, you just let me know. But, yeah. I'm sorry. I think Bachelor number one is saying she's eaten a lot of heroines, like female heroes. Yeah. Oh. Yeah. I've eaten a lot of heroin, the drug, but that's.

It's a story for another day, maybe. You know, if we go on the date, I'll tell you all about it. I like that. You kind of leaving me wanting more. Okay, well, let's move back to Bachelorette number one. Bory, you are, I believe, a blue dragon that devours heroines. I don't really understand the, like, lip situation on there, But can you make the sound of your sexiest kiss for me?

Would you like me to do that in my dwarf form or in dragon form? You know, I'll take an A and a B. Okay, all right. So in dwarf form, he'll dwarf form. It sounds like this. Oh, yeah, baby, that's it. All right. Yeah.

That's what you're kissing sounds like. Yeah, there's a lot of tongue in there, too, I guess. But, like, considering that my face is hidden by a veil right now, it's kind of hard to, you know, it acts as kind of a pop filter for all of the macing noises. And as a dragon, it sounds a lot like, Yeah, I like that. All that could be yours. Noted.

Ooh. Okay. You know what? No, let's make that for the group, too. Thomas No. 1, Bachelor 3. Yeah, what's the sound of your sexiest kiss? Thank you for the question.

It's an honor to be able to answer. Well, the sound of my sexiest kiss would go a little bit something like. this. Hey there. Oh, God. Close the door. Close the door. The chairs get it.

Ah! You fucking, give me that rope. Give me that rope. Give me the rope. You motherfucker. Fuck you. Fuck you.

You stupid piece of furniture. His eyes are somewhere. Get it? Yeah. I can give away everything but this stupid curse. I tell you, don't punch someone in the face if you're at a,

sort of like retirement community for evil wizards. Because their furniture, long after they've rehabilitated, their furniture still hasn't forgiven you. Oh, to answer your question. Yeah, great. The kiss, great. I do want to circle back on the rocking chair. Now, you are behind a curtain.

So I really, what happened back there? And where is the chair? Um, the chair. Oh my God. Chair's gone. Did anyone see where it went? Shit. Oh, no.

It'll come back soon. It always comes back. Hey, live studio audience, if you can, do us a favor. Keep an eye out for that chair. Uh, please, if everyone could just shout, chair if they see it come back. Thank you. I think I'm pretty sure it uses echo location. I know it has eyes, but they're not very powerful.

They might be looking straight down. They might be in the bottom of the. chair. So it's just sort of listening for you and then just rocks gently towards you? Yeah, normally I have to be very, very silent. But what can I say? I wanted a chance for love. Also, I'm very tall. Do you consider five three incredibly tall? No, I don't consider five. I would. Oh, you would consider five three incredibly tall? Yes, at standing at four foot, nothing, I would consider 5.3 incredibly tall. Actually, yes.

Sorry, I would consider 5.3 incredibly tall. I assumed because something funny about me is my build is absolutely massive at an impressively tall 5.3. Yes. I mean,

Abria, Tom 2 here, I mean, you can't see it, but this guy's elbows go out for days. I mean, we are getting rocked over here. Wait, so you can all see each other, back there? Oh, yeah, we're all just standing. Yeah, we watch this chair really lay into this guy. I used to actually be quite a slender fellow, but then I wrestled a chair multiple times a day every day for five years. That'll do it. That's good. I mean, it does feel like CrossFit.

Oh, yeah, for sure. Part of the reason that you may have heard me referred to as a beggar, that's actually because I gave away all of my belongings, because if I kept them, the chair would destroy them. So there's no point in me owning anything. That's fair and sad. Thank you. Yeah. I'm going to move.

Thomas, too. Quick question. There was a mention of a cobald allergy. Oh, yes. Is that sort of a general dragon and dragon kin allergy? or is it very specifically Colbolts? Because I do know you are

behind the scenes with a dragon. So how are you doing? Yes, no. It's just, I mean, I've got a little sniffle. I've got just the littlest one. But that's,

that's, I think I'm just kind of getting over something. He's got a runny nose, actually. Sorry, I wasn't supposed to say that. Okay. Hey, don't throw me under the bus, all right? We all want to date, we all want to have sex with a Brea, all right?

We're all open and we get bagged, all right? So, you know, relax, boring. But no, it's, no, it's just genetic. My father, my father, my father's father, my father's father, father. We're all allergic to cobalts. It's just a thing I'm living with, doing the best I can with what I've got. You know, if they do come around, though, I mean, they need to,

I mean, again, it's been tough as a pacifist because they need to die. If they get too close to me, it's full and, ophalaxic. So, yeah. Well, I've always wanted to be an enforcer. Okay, another question for the group, and we'll just go in numerical order. So you're stranded on an island. What three things do you wish you had? So do we go in numerical order of our bachelor number or of Thomas's? Because then I am not a Thomas, so that would mean that Thomas 1 goes first, Thomas 2 goes first, and as the least Thomas, then I would go last. So am I going last or first?

Bori, I appreciate your attention to detail. I would love it. If you were to suddenly be a Thomas, do you think you would be sort of a Thomas negative one? Point five. Yeah. I would be Thomas. Point five.

Judging by the heights in this group. I think that makes you first, so you can go ahead and kick it off. Dang. Excellent. What was the question again? You're stranded on a desert island. What three things?

things do you wish you had? I wouldn't be stranded on the desert island, seeing as how I can fly to places. Oh. Do you want to go to a stranded, a desert island, and be stranded there with me? If I say yes, will you eat me? Um, uh, um, you? No, I, I told you what kind of, of women that I'm into eating, but, you know. A heroin. Uh.

The other one, too. Oh, okay. Well, that was actually a bit of a deal breaker. No, go ahead. Okay, to answer your question, if I was stranded on an island, I would want, of course, you know, something for betting,

maybe like some coins or cash would be all right. And then I would also like probably a display case for all my handkerchiefs that I collect. I've got all kinds of hankies. And I would probably have a knife. Knives are always very useful on a desert island. That's pretty good. I'm going to pivot this question because now you mentioned golden cash.

How do you feel about crypto? Question to all the Thomas is. How do we feel about cryptocurrency? Starting with the dragon. Oh, well, it doesn't make very good betting. Fair. But there are a lot of virgins that have it. So, you know.

My feelings about cryptocurrency, I would say that anything that cannot be carried in the hands or pockets is not going to be optimal for me to sort of sit down and actually unpack a digital wallet is not something the chair gives me enough time for. So I sort of need to exist in a, you know, having physical specie on my hand, right? I need to have actual cash dollars. Because again, when I go to sleep, I can't have anything on me. You know, I can only get a cat nap before the chair finds me. So I'm not a huge fan of cryptocurrency for those reasons, also for its environmental impact and also just being a Ponzi scheme in general. So this is a rare example of a beggar being a cheeser.

And I like that for you. Hey, thank you so much. Wow. If you're as cute as your puns, then you can help hide me from this chair. And Thomas number two Oh, I mean, as a drug deal alone I love it Who had it?

Easy answer. Love it. Big into it. NFTs, the whole fucking bag. Wow, the last guy who's into NFTs, amazing. Hey, I'm fighting for it. You know, I judge people by their actions.

Not their words. I mean, I would never, No, I'm just kind of like. Yes, consciously objecting to letting it go. I'm holding on. tight, tight. You have to let go. You have to be willing to let go.

So I don't know. I also want to say real briefly that if I were stranded on Desert Island, I would be so happy. I would be so, so happy because I don't think the chair can swim. But it's just hard to get to an island when you don't have any money.

And if we're jumping on that bandwagon, I would say probably of course, Mooshy, probably the Beatles White album that's kind of a big one for me and I don't go anywhere without cheese it

so those are my kind of three now this is going to be a deal breaker which kind of cheese it oh extra toasty correct answer oh thank God I was real scared there for a moment

because if you if you were the kind of person who likes regular cheese it's I was about to un-passify myself and pacify you Don't you threaten me with a good time. Okay. Hmm.

Well, let's see. Bachelor number three. Oh, right. Well, that alarm, that alarm means, you know, I don't actually know what that alarm means. Is it the fucking chair? Is it the fucking chair? I know, because it's going off in the whole building. Oh, God.

Do you hear that? Do you hear the tip-tac? caps on the metal. Ah, shit. I think the spiders from the Joe Roken Fear Factor reboot one studio over fucking in the vents. Oh, everybody, everybody fucking run. Everybody's fucking

save yourself. Holy shit. Oh, fuck, they're here. Oh, God. Oh, there's spiders in the studio. Shit, uh, everybody. Roll initiative so that we can decide in one order, we're going to do things. Oh my God, dude.

I absolutely suck. I absolutely I didn't even look at this. My highest stat is 10, and it's in strength. Everything else is eights and sevens. I don't even have a class. I'm a beggar. I'm fucking dead, dude. I am straight up fucking dead, man.

Hey, hey, dude, we got a show to do. All that you need to survive, so that one of you can get bad and or tagged, all right? Now, rule initiative. In an order, if we were to go in an order for violence, I would be a 13 fast. I rolled a straight up one I rolled a straight up one I fucking suck I'm dead

I'm so fucking dead God I'm so impatient I can't believe I have to go last weirdly enough I also rolled a one so hey bud uh we've hit damsel territory protect my god please protect me can I go first I'll protect you I promise yeah what's your decks um um um blubley well how are we feeling about a hot seven. It's only a minus two. No,

I'm going to go and then you can go after me, but... I'm so impatient. I'm very impatient. Thomas, too. Well, all right. No, I'm just looking over. I have a three in dexterity. So, uh...

Wait, a three modifier or just a three modifier. So I I have, I got a... no, no, no, no. I have a three total. I got a minus, I have a minus four. So while I rolled at eight, it is knocked down to a four. Okay, the pacifist really coming through.

Don't worry. All three bachelors are going to equally contribute to this fight. We have an unarmed, incredibly slow beggar, and we have a pacifist with a ferret and a blue dragon. We're all going to contribute equally to the fight. I promise. All right. So as Craig, I only have two eyes. So I can only look at one person at a time and describe for our audience at home what they are in the, what they are in, what they are doing at any given moment.

So I'm just going to go in this order based on kind of people's ability to actually move and do something. So I'm going to be looking over at Bori and describing that for you then, Thomas II. then a Bria and then Thomas number one. Hey spiders, take a look at this. I hold up my left hand. Oh, my God. A bunch of spiders are looking at Bori's head, seeing this shocking elephant.

Oh, my God, I'm going to throw up. Holy fuck. Oh, God, that's nasty. They are all going to make, it seems like some kind of check is being asked of their constitution, um, which only one of the

spider seems to have succeeded as the rest vomit up enough bile that they seem to be incapacitated. Wow. Is Bori doing it? I'm looking at Bori. I can't tell if Borey's doing anything else. What's Bory doing? That tattoo move

was super effective, but my God, Bori, I'm not going to do shit on my turn. I follow the sound of... Does anybody else hear that... That creaking wood? Oh, God. This is the fucking chair.

This is the fucking chair. Hey. Oh, God, there it is. I speak chair. What? What? Wait, the chair. Wait, did you tell the chair to attack?

Yes, I did. Fuck! Don't tell it to do that. Wait, I'm watching Bori make some kind of persuasive check with regard to if the chair is going to act on her. desires. Can I provide the help action, Craig? Sure, I can't see you right now, but I'll assume that is happening in my periphery. Yeah. 23. The chair is swing it down. It's carina through spiders left and right. You really do speak chair. They have a language. All right, I feel like I've looked at

boring enough. I think I'm going to turn my head to look over at Thomas number two. Uh, well, as a pacifist, I can't I can only judge the actions of these spiders as they murder this live in studio audience and make way for my fellow bachelors and a brea.

And I also have a minus four dexterity so it takes me a lot. I'm not great at walking or kind of just any sort of movement. I'm just going to I'm going to sit here and think on this.

Bachelor number two, you're thinking? Well, I'm going to take in the actions that people are choosing to do, consider them. I'm not going to listen. I'm just going to watch. Jesus. Jesus. Thomas 2.

Thomas 2 is just getting totally pensive and meditative. Looks like it's up to Thomas 1. Well, actually, I'm sorry, Thomas 1. I have to look over in a Brea first. What?

Excuse me. Oh, I'm so impatient. Fuck. I'm sorry, I'm going to go, I'm going to look over at the spiders to see what they are doing. Oh, God. They're making a series of attacks on the audience. Oh, God, they're critiquing. Oh, God, the spiders.

Oh, shit. They're bringing up our studio audience. No, put down that old lady. Oh, God. They're ripping them in half. Oh, shit. Shit, I think by the time we get around, kind of me being able to look around again, the studios and the in-house defenses will kick on.

Oh, shit. Oh, God. Oh, they're going to tear me apart. I'm going to look over at Abria now. Abria, what are you doing? I'm trying to maintain my position in front of, uh, Craig, are we supposed to continue? People are dying and there's a curtain. You can't look on this side of the screen.

You can't look at the side of the screen. Don't look over there. We have to keep rolling. We have to keep, we have the studio until 6 p.m. All right? And then we're into overtime, and I can't afford that. So we're just going to make this part of the show. You pay for this out of pocket, Mr. Sumgey?

Yeah. Yeah. There's nothing wrong with bootstrapping it. I just need to make a pilot, and then I'll show it to Lou and Abria and the other people, and then they'll all invest in it. We'll do like a bunch of these. But for the first one, I just took money out of my own pocket. Oh, God.

You know. Yeah. Then you know what? The show must go on. I am stepping over corpses and sundry limbs of dead and main studio members and perching gently on my stool and waiting for my cue to continue the game. Okay, great. So, yeah, when we get back around to it, you'll be ready to think about all the things you've been hearing and who you want to bag or who you want to tag. All right, I'm going to look over at you, Thomas I.

It does seem like you have to save the dead. I knew this day would come. I knew this day would come. Carl, Carl, Clarkeld. I don't, I don't, I don't, I'm going to talk very quietly because I don't like people. Who, who are you talking to? Nobody, nobody. Carl, you are my, are my perfect gnomish god of protection, humor,

trickery and gem cutting. Right now, I'm mostly interested in the protection. Though to what degree you add trickery, humor, or gem cutting, I leave up to your discretion. Thomas, aren't you a half-elph? What? Aren't you a half-elph?

I am a squat, broad half-elf with green skin and golden hair. And I'm very impatient, and I don't like to talk about my faith. And the chair has been hunting me for as long as I can remember. But I do know one thing.

These spiders have to leave this game show because I love a Brea Aigar. There goes my hero. I'm body slamming the spiders. This has to work. I don't have an adventuring class. Oh, gosh. Make some kind of rinders.

Roll. I rolled a five. Five minus two is three. I don't have any class features. Let's get these spiders. Wait, hold on. It seems like there might be some sort of divine presence in the space. Can you make some kind of religion check to see, like, if maybe you can touch it or connect with it?

Garl. Garl, is this you? Please be discreet. Don't intervene in a way that would. tip my hand that I'm faithful to you. Girl, that's another five. That's straight up another five.

Girl, please. Maybe it's just five. Oh, no, he's falling onto the rocking chair. Oh, God. Oh, God. I know this is how it would happen. Rocking chair. Kill me.

Kill me so hard that my blood and bones splatters out and kills the spiders. That's finally ended after all these years. Oh, wait, look. The defenses are coming on. Studio defenses, initiate. Oh, okay. The spiders are being mowed down.

They have homing. They won't hit any of us. Oh, oh, God. Oh, oh, shit. Oh, the spiders, they've been killed. All right. If everyone can just sit the fuck back down, we're going to finish the show.

All right. It doesn't seem like the rocking chair is tearing you apart or anything, Thomas. Are you okay? Do you feel all right? I think, I think when I jumped on those spiders, I think something burst inside my body. I think. Like a spleen or a kidney? I think so. You know, one of the things, one of the things about me is that I share everything I own.

up to it including my own life. I'm so glad that I died defending Abria. By the way, my, I'm not, my real name's not Bachelor number three. My real name is Thomas number one. And that's not even my real name. My real name is Thomas Darkdraft. I've always loved you. Stop, you're not going to die on this show.

You're not going to die on this show. Bramria, you need to pick one of these people now, and then I'm going to throw his body out on the street so that he didn't die during the show. If he died outside of the show, I think it's totally cool. Disneyland rolls. I get it, I get it. If someone called an empty, I might be able to make it.

No, no. All right, let's wrap this up. Okay, here we are. We're at the end. Oh, I'm sorry. Bory, did you want to repeat that question? Oh, I was just asking if Thomas No one has had sex before. You're smelling real good right now.

What's that? I've only had sex if you count the times that the chair attacked me while I was in a state of arousal. All right. Basketler number one. I will choose you if you eat bachelor number three. What? I don't know if that counts as sex, but it's some of the only time I've ever been touched in a pleasurable way. Oh, yeah.

Oh, shit. You like that? Mmm, delicious. Oh, I do like it. This is good for me. This is good for me. The chair can't get me in here.

Well, Bria, it's the time of the game show where you decide if you want to back it or tag it. A Bachelor number one is still available.

Bachelor number two is, it seems to be deep in a meditative space. And Bachelor number three is within Bachelor number one. So I guess the question... So technically, if you choose me, that means that you're also choosing Bachelor number three. Why didn't I think to get the magic items that are part of the game show when the fight happened? I... So, what do you want to do? Yeah, I'm going to go with the...

It was a hard decision. And at the end of the day, I'm going to pick the devil's polycule. Bachelor's number 0.5. 1.5. I pick 1.5. Yay. Wow. Well, Bachelor number two, thanks for being here.

And you can see your way out. Oh, that's all right. You know, I guess I'll have to find a mommy for mushy somewhere else. Okay. Well, you could have, I guess this is the part where I revealed that you could have tagged it and had a plus one temperedic mattress. But that's okay. You and Bachelor number 1.5, you get to go and bag it. Everyone, thank you so much.

Sorry. Thank you all for listening. and apologies to the families of those in our live studio audience who gave their lives so that a brieic could have consensual sex with a blue dragon with another man being chased by a chair inside of it. I've been Craig Sungie. It's warm in here. The chair can't get me. I'm happy.

And I will likely be sued for the events that have transpired here. I hope you enjoy it. This has been back. Take it over! Tag it! Da-da!