WRFH/Radio Free Hillsdale 101.7 FM - Here's My Buddy T-Rex | Boys Only #38

Episode Date: May 8, 2026

Nate and Storm chat with Dean of Men Aaron Petersen about loving who you lead, a Styrofoam airhorn, and prehistoric veggie burgers on the final episode of the semester.

Not being penultimate, you could say this is the ultimate episode of the podcast this semester. It is of the year, the semester. Of junior year, of all time, really. Not quite. Well, all time up until this point. Yes, of all time to now. I like the word ultimate. It describes this semester very well, this episode very well.

Everything's been building up to this. I'm Storm Drexler. I'm Nate Gallagher. And you're in for a very special episode of Boys Only. This week, our guest needs no introduction, but we will do it anyway because you're listening to a podcast. This week, we have on the Dean of Men of Hillsdale College, Dean Aaron Peterson. How's it going? Good afternoon.

For the ladies and gentlemen, mostly gentlemen, that don't know you for some bizarre reason on campus or perhaps off-campus listeners, who are you? And what do you do here at Hillsdale College? as dean of men I primarily oversee the men on campus their well-being so it's a it's like asking a dad what does a dad do right you know what I mean so there's lots of things but you know some basic fundamental things would be guys housing um at overseeing academic advising making sure they're doing all right in the classroom outside the classroom obviously disciplinary issues you know there's the dad hat right come on son we need to talk but yeah I think I look at my office as there's there's kind of that the dad part but you know there's a little bit of

deacon mixed in there you know we're we're involved in formation of our young men their growth and maturity, develop the minds and improve the hearts, I would say that professors really do a lot of both of those things. We tend to kind of focus on their hearts, the young men's hearts. And this is a season in life where boys, young men are kind of out on their own for the most part for the first time and start thinking about who they are. and who they want to be and what they want to do and kind of look back at their lives

and just kind of examine it. It's a transition period for their lives. And it's an important four years. It involves a lot of playfulness, a lot of seriousness. And we try to help in all those things. If it's too playful, we let them know. And not that either of you two have ever had to spend any time in my office. No, we're far from playful.

Yeah. Very serious. Yes. Yes. So yeah, yeah, for those listening, oversee the well-being of the men on campus, a little bit of disciplinarian, a little bit of counselor and coach and formator

and probably with me a little bit of a comedian, I like to think. Yeah, okay, there's mixed reviews on that for the audience from the people sitting here. My kids think I'm funny. That's probably not true. but I keep working at it. Lots of dad jokes.

Yeah, oh yeah. Dad tend to be the funnier of the two parents. No offense, mom. No offense, moms, but over here on boys, only we endorse dad. We do endorse the dad. So how did you, because you were a student here, correct? How did you find Hillsdale and get the job as the Dean of Men?

Like, give us a little background. How did I find Hillsdale as a student? Yes, sir. So I'm from the west side of Michigan, Grand Rapids area. and loved baseball. And my senior year, I always kind of thought I'd go somewhere and play baseball.

As a young man who liked sports, that was kind of my focus. I figured I'd want to be a good school and play baseball. Then my senior year, a new head football coach, and he came in and moved me to what they call a skilled position. I did not start my junior year in high school football. I was a backup on the line on both sides of the ball. And then this guy came in and moved me, sent me to quarterback camp because I was a baseball player.

And we lost what looked like our number one and two quarterbacks, transferring schools and one not wanting to play. And he kind of looked around. I was kind of the best of the rest, you know. So we thought sent me to camp. The one kid came out, did it end up coming out. And so he beat me out at that position. but then I moved to returning or being a receiver, a tight end,

you know, that sort of thing. So skilled position, sometimes in the backfield getting the ball. I never touched the ball. They wouldn't let me touch the ball, the last coach. But then I actually, this young man was probably going to go Division I in football in game two, running back,

playing in his, basically got his knee blown out. And he was kind of the offense. We revolved around. So what happened is they moved me to doing some of his stuff in the backfield. I started returning punts and kickoffs. I don't look at, in fact, I didn't look at that. I certainly don't look at it now. But I could move surprisingly fast.

And I started returning punts and kicks and catching balls and doing scoring touchdowns and all that sort of thing. And all of a sudden, Hillsdale College, who's in the state two hours away from me, they wanted me to come play football and baseball. and I'd never heard of the school. So I came for a visit with my best friend that I grew up with in John Loria, who you wouldn't know the name necessarily, except for he's our guy at Stryker Medical,

who is single-handedly recruited probably, I don't know, there's probably 35 Hillsdale College grads, but he came here, and I was kind of his sidekick because he was the good one, and went on the trip, and we met the got a walk of the campus, probably not too dissimilar from you guys, just got a feel for it, met the coaches,

and, you know, we're here to learn first, and you can play both sports here, and I got a good financial aid package, and I just felt at home when I got here, and I was able to afford coming. So that's how I got here. It was actually through sports that I heard of Hillsdale. And then once I, once people found out,

hey, where are you going to play sports or that sort of thing? I said Hillsdale college, and any time, and every time I said Hillsdale, they'd say, good school. Oh, they would, yeah. Yeah. For me, it's always, oh, good school or where? Huh? What's that? You know, that's probably true. Or you go to an evil. I've gotten that ones only. That doesn't, that wasn't happening in 1990 and 91. You know, the, uh, always, you know,

traditional conservative school, but it was always, some would, you know what, Storm, that's right. Some would say, where? But most people in Michigan had heard of it. I just, I hadn't. So it was good, good distance, two hours away, far enough from home, um, but not too far from home. Um, but not too far from So it was great. Did my years here, end up being a science major and biology major and chemistry. Actually, with an eye towards going into med school for psychiatry. Actually, I was going to be a major in Christian studies or religion. And I thought mind, body and soul, right?

You know, the theology and all those sorts of things. And then I got into the sports and that took a lot of time. and, you know, probably too much focus. But, and then I started looking around, like, all these guys going to med school, they're chemistry and biology majors. And one of my buddies said, yeah, dude, what are you doing? You better be a bio major.

So I switched to that. And then I decided I didn't, you know, towards the end, I met my wife. And I didn't want to go to med school. I kind of learned I don't love science as much as one should, maybe, to go to med school, if you're going to spend another five years doing it. So I knew,

Kathy's my wife's name. But I knew, okay, whatever my mission is, it's going to be with her. We're going to get married. So I knew he was getting married and then end up taking a sales job with a company that I worked in a factory for. And I knew the owners. And they said, all right, we'll put you in sales. So I did business.

I did a couple of different businesses, sales for two years, I guess. And then I thought, yeah, I don't know. I don't know if the business is the thing for me. You know, kind of my heart was stirring. And then I just, I don't know how I thought of teaching. It just made sense. And I called my folks and I said, yeah, we always kind of thought you'd be a teacher. So I went, switched to teach it.

I was going to find out, hey, what does it take to become a teacher? Here's, and I sent my transcripts to, my mom worked for the Catholic diocese in Grand Rapids. And she worked next to the superintendent. And as a courtesy, I said, hey, would you have him look at this and say, how much would it take for me to become like a real teacher, you know, certification, education class, whatever? Well, what that turned into is they needed a science teacher

at Grand Rapids Catholic Central, which was my other alma mater. And I got a call from the principal and said, would you be willing to come here? Now you're not certified. You'd have to enroll at Aquinas College in Grand Rapids. And because we're all part of the same diocese, you would be able to, half of it, tuition would be covered. Of course, I was married at that point with one kid, and so money mattered.

It always matters, but it particularly mattered then. And I ended up going there teaching science, chemistry, biology, physical science, and coaching. I was a head baseball coach and an offensive line coach for varsity football, and that's what I was going to do and move into high school administration. And then I met Dr. Arn. And there was the position open to my, the guy. who was my dean, John Coonrat, actually the dean before him too was on campus but he was

teaching, he was a professor and but anyway John called me and said hey I'm moving on I think you should throw your name in the hat here this I think you know you may be young but this may be a good fit for you and I said okay and so I did and like I said I met Dr. Arne and and and it was like I I want this job. I didn't want it. I did as a courtesy. Like I was like, I don't know. I kind of like where I'm at.

I kind of see a path. Right. And raise a bunch of kids around a dirt ball field or whatever, become an administrator, making a difference that way in the school system. And then I met him. And I could hear what he wanted to do. And then that's when it shifted. And I came in mid-year in January because I think that,

the one predecessor was teaching, did the fall first semester. But basically it turned out that I started when no one else that I went to school with was here. So I was 27 when I started as Dean of Men, which is pretty young. I'm staring down 53 here this weekend. Wow.

This weekend. Happy birthday. Yeah, May the 4th, it's a Star Wars birthday. That is amazing. That's amazing. Next year I will have been Dina Men. for half of my life. Wow.

That is crazy. Dude, that's a great wrong. You guys think I'm difficult now. Talk to the guys that came in 2001 and 2002 when I was 27. That's awesome. Well, I always like to ask alumni, especially alumni from more than like the last couple of years, when you got back and started as Dean of Men, what did you, what did you noticed that had changed in the college over the whatever five to seven years you were gone?

And then what since then have you noticed has changed? as the college has grown? Right away my mind goes to kind of physical structure and culture. So physical structure was, they look pretty much the same. With the exception of they, when they were knocking down the two buildings that were in the footprint of Moss and Delp. Moss and Delp were kind of like a retooling, a better retooling of two original buildings there. And when I came here for the one interview, they were knocking them down and that sort of thing. That was crazy.

That's where I had classes. Of course, you guys wouldn't know. But it'd be like for you guys coming back and like, they're knocking Lane and Kennell. And Moss and Delper gone. Wow. Wow. Right. And they're doing something different there.

And Lane and Kendall were parking lots even when I got here. Right. So that all looked the same. But those, that was the main different. There's a classroom building that ugly orange brick, you know, that we kind of laugh at here because we're architectural snobs and rightfully so. But that was behind Central Hall. It was just a different, it was a little bit different, but since then, when my buddies

come back and haven't been here for years, their chin hits the ground, right? Culturally. Yeah, admittedly, that's what I'm. more interested at the culture. Yeah. Listen, that didn't really start shifting until about three,

four years into it, right? You know, it was pretty much the same. My vice president for student affairs and my dean of women at the time, rest of her soul, Caroline Barker was here. She was my wife's Dean of Women and the VP of Student Affairs

when I was here. And so things are kind of the same. And we're trying to figure out, you know, Dr. Arne and we're trying to figure out that campus culture. I think Dr. Arnha always tells those stories about, you know, not everyone came here understanding what we're about, you know, some came like, hey, great football school, great sports school, great business school, great this school, great that, everyone kind of had their own, I don't know if this word's right, but kind of like different ideas of what it was. And then it would show itself and sometimes students would be upset in the lunchroom, right?

like when he would sit down, you know, he started right away talking. And like they're mad like, I was sold that I was told it was like this school, a party school. Someone said back in the 60s and that does be the same. That's just a funny example. Most liberal arts, small schools get that like, I heard there's a party school. I think that's a universal thing.

I don't know how true it is for, but anyway. So there is, so for all practical purposes, it was the same. Simpson still smelled the same. Like I will tell you when I walk in it. So mostly when I'm on.

this campus it's the place where I work and I've raised my family and my job and all that there are moments where all of a sudden I'm transported like those movie scenes where the vision gets kind of like like all of a sudden you're like you blue yeah that's right and all of a sudden you know I'm young again it's different walking in the back doors of Simpson that's the exact smell has been the same forever it doesn't matter how much paint or how much bleach has been used there is a Simpson smell, right? Because you were head array. Yeah.

Correct? Yep. And so I was on, when I was head R.A, I was on the north side. And it had like an expanded room. Like I heard about that. Yeah,

yeah, yeah. Yeah, that was awesome. That's not the room you're in now. That is the room I'm in. He's the roommate. I live with Jonathan Williams. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, that's right. We, I'm in that,

well, that room. It's the same room. Yeah. Wow. I was heard that Brock Lutz had lived in that room. I lived in that room. You're in the Dean Pete, Brock Lutz room.

That's awesome. Yeah. That is. You should be deeply honored by that. I want that little cubby. More so me, not Brock. I want that little cubby.

Like you said that there was like a little hideaway cubby. Like I want that back. You know, imagine when this thing was built in the 60s, right? Is this a 65 on the outside of the building? I think it's, or 65 or 66. It was dedicated in the 70s,

but it's from like the 60s. Yeah. So what that was was like you walk down that hallway, like you're going to your room instead of when you go to take a right into your door, you know, take a right now you can take three under four or five extra steps and then hit the wall well what was there was a glass like window with the metal like whatever the metal uh what do they call that rendals yeah well no just like a like a like a like a like your back window like for defrosting or so

i don't know why i had but just that kind of extra stability for the panes of glass and it looked like you know that was where i was supposed to and i used to do it as a joke i'd set up my desk open up the curtains from the inside and just sit there and stare at them. No, we didn't have these in 94. We didn't have little keypats, right? That's how long ago it was. You know, some of us had word processors, but it was just kind of there. Typewriters.

Yeah. And, you know, just mess with the guys as they're coming down and pound on the window. Like, what are you doing? And at that time, I was like 250, shaved head. I was the captain of both those sports, right? Like, guys were really scared of me. The younger kids, it was great. What are you doing?

here so anyway it was fun um yeah but that extra room is where you i put in my illegal love seat you know uh the small sofa and the television like it was like awesome and i watched but i was also my first year without my wife she did her fifth year doing nursing school and i was i came back into the dorm to be head of ray and um at simpson and uh um and so i what's really funny is they're so bored my wife would even say I think that was a mild depression for you but I watch and my teammates like all my friends

a lot of my friends were gone I loved the job but there's just times like you know like you with John you're all gone where are they? So I watched Groundhog Day came out it came out at that time and I literally watched it

maybe a hundred times a year it's so good so like I took the concept of Groundhog Day and I just And I lived it. Every day. It was my happy. Because we didn't have, what do you guys call them?

TikTok or really were reels or all those things. Like, so that was my, you know, my real. Small groundhog day. Yeah. So, I mean,

Simpson wasn't Simpson when you were in it. But do you, can you tell any stories of like some, like something funny prank? Maybe you pull on some unsuspecting freshmen. Yeah. I mean, I was involved.

So the way we did it. And so I learned. learned a lot as a student, like there's a lot of things that inform me as dean of maybe, maybe not the best way to do things at Simpson, you know. So for instance, I was part of a very big freshman football recruiting class, right? I don't know. At least it seemed like, you know, 35 plus of us. And maybe that's standard now, I guess.

But anyway, it was a big class. So you take the, you take the third floors, all right, on either side. and you take half the hall. So you go up to your side, third floor north, 3FN. We never called it that. Those were cool names later. We go up to 3FN and on the left side, so on the southern side of the,

we're all football players. And we got here, we got here two weeks earlier before anyone else. So we all bonded and we're great. On the right side, we're non-athletes. With the exception of a couple of track guys. Yeah, I don't know what we called them.

We didn't, you guys all have the, cool names now. What is it? Non-athlet, regular people. Narb. I know. Yeah.

So I don't, we didn't, we were just weren't clever enough back then, right? So anyway, all those guys came in the other side. And you could have, and what it did. So there was some great stuff from that because they came in and we already bonded and we drove up their energy. And we bonded across the hall with these guys and started laughing and joking and get to know them. But our floor, let's just say this, our was, our floor was, our floor was,

the only floor for years that they brought in a third RA to tame it. They were like, we got to, now that's like standard practice on 3FN. Well, back then it was just 2, 2, 2, 2, 2, 2, everywhere. And so we, you know, we've changed things a little bit. Even with the diffusement of the football players to kind of everyone else. Yeah, so just as a side note, you know, that the compares. So somewhere between my experience, and I'll get to a story, but somewhere between my experience of just putting them all together,

sweeten them up, take a whole side. You know, the upside of that is they're bonding with each other, right? That sort of thing. But, you know, the concern is they bonded so well with each other. They don't bond with anyone else. And there's just, you know, we learned when I got here as Dean, there's conversations at, you know, at Notre Dame, no varsity athlete, even rooms with another varsity athlete or tail.

I don't know if that's still true or the case. But we kind of said, well, let's do some of that. So we, for the most part, sweet. athletes with non-athletes or that sort of thing that's been going on for years that's kind of intentional but there is something to be said about i mean the bonding that went on on our third floor uh was exceptional was good across the hall and here's here's the story so one of the guys there's some mischievous guys on the other side and uh i'm cautious to do this because i i'm looking at simpson guys aren't you're simpson guy too right i just thought yeah okay panicked for a second

You weren't wearing the shirt. I'm wearing a Simpson shirt right. You know, I got to be careful of stories because I don't want to be inspirational in certain ways. We're both leaving, we're going off campus.

We're both leaving the door. And you promised this is just between us three. And you wouldn't share this with anyone else. I mean, all the three of us. And all of the listeners. And the entire audience. It's not that good of a one.

But there's one guy, so he had the air horn, right? Just a little thing, a small air horn thing, you know. And so. And one of the RAs struggled to get along with athletes. In fact, it's why it became an RA.

Like, this is not that complicated to get along. I mean, I was taking Latin with all, you know, the, there weren't any other football players in my Latin class. Actually, no, I take that back, Dr. Caspar, who's here. He and I were in it together. We're both tight ends and we spent all the time together. But there weren't a lot of us, right? And I was taking Christian studies and things like that.

So I just thought, how hard is this to, you know, people, it informs me as a dean like you don't you got to love them if you're going to lead them right you can't resent them because they're anyway so there was a struggle on the leadership side on that floor in hindsight but they're good guys but they just didn't know how to connect with with the they were non-athletes and the one was good and the other one was not but he was going to get madder and matter and so the guys across the hall actually the non-athletes could feel that pressure they're knocking on it oh remind me to come back to a culture thing there is one culture shift that it didn't change right away,

but it's really important. Okay, and we will. So anyway, he'd come down, knock on door, I'll give you a hint. They would in the beginning each school year do a tone setting all dorm room search. The RAs. Yeah, the whole RA team in every dorm.

At least in all the guy. That's the best way I can describe it is tone setting. Like the first weekend out, you know, people are going out to like different locations, some off campus, like in today's world, like wandering down to Manning Street or the other play, am I allowed to say Manning Street? It's just a street, it's just a street, guys. But you know, that kind of like, you know, just exploring the campus, right? And, you know, there's, you know, worldly vices available back in 91, fall 91 is when I started,

you know, that sort of thing. And so guys, you know, would not always follow the alcohol rules and that sort of thing, right? So, but anyway, to keep, you know, but one thing at Hillsdale College is always trying to maintain is that we do not want, this is not going to be like the other schools where there's partying and co-ed dorms and things like that. We got a serious goal and so we got to manage that. So they just kind of did it the tough way they set a dorm and they just go through and there's like drawers were left open. Things were moved around. They were looking for beers and things. So it set an adversarial tone immediately.

Yeah. Right. and we're so far away from it. I mean, there's still that when you're in leadership, right? Like, I'm in a loving, great guy, right? You guys would agree. Yeah, of course. But there's guys, because of my position that, you know,

guys are like, you know, and I'll say maybe times, most times maybe I deserve that. I don't know. But it comes with the office, right? And it comes with the office RA too. You got to, my RA's got to be aware of that. But anyway, they'd, so tone setting room searches, one of our rAs was really kind of clumsy with the you know the guys who came here for sports who many of them are brilliant you know but they they didn't anyway you get it so he took the air horn one of the guys across the hall and like 12 o'clock on a Wednesday night you know

in the hallway I wasn't expecting like the front hallway you want me do it again you know whatever that was actually exactly what it said And the rest was like, what's going that? And then even it was a secret on our floor a little bit. Like, we're going to have fun with the whole dorm, but we're going to have fun with you guys on the floor. We're not going to tell you who it is. But we all kind of knew who it was, right? And so, and man, just the, all right, like, we will find the whole floor.

We will do this. We will do that, you know, all these sorts of things. And it became a thing. So that was. that was a lot of hours and months of torture. I mean, that lasted for months and they can never figure it out. And then one time they'd come up and then I would admit that I was getting a little irritated

with the tenor at the time of some of the leadership and the R. guys and some guy from across the hall. We just call him Sherlock Holmes. Sherlock Holmes because he's always wore that hat in the pipe. He's a great guy, right? But clearly not wanting to make a connection with some of the RAs. He actually was a great guy. But they came out there mad one time,

and I was a mischievous. And so the horn went off, and they all came up in full force. I knew they were. So I grabbed a Tylenol bottle in one of these, like the water, thank you for the water, by the way, but one of these,

what are these called? Styrphone, little coffee cups, the cheap ones, you know, I mean, I don't mean to insult you. It was very good for today's.

Yes, of course. Of course. So imagine this. like taking that and going like this and holding it. Yeah, and I was baiting, what we call rage baiting, right? Oh,

yeah, yeah, so I stepped out in the hallway when I knew they're up there and I kind of looked around like, I wonder if they're here. And he saw me holding it and from afar totally thought.

He came, Peterson, Pete, get out here. And I ran in the room and slammed the door intentionally. Because it looks like an air horn. Yeah,

absolutely looks like an air horn. And he was pounding, let me in. Not by the hair of my chinny. No, I didn't. say that but chin chin you got it actually i think i did since i'm you know i don't know in the my timing of this but you got to ask me nicely you know it's that tone and finally i let in and he comes in and i'm like obviously holding something behind my back and like what like let me see it let me

have it and i go what i know you're holding it behind your back and i was like all right and i held it out and the look of anger on his face you know That was perfect. That's a great idea. Simpson freshmen, write that down. The other thing I can tell you that I did, I actually kind of led this as an R.A. You know, sometimes maybe the playfulness. You know, we got a balance of playfulness and seriousness, right?

And living with guys and that sort of thing. But I won't give particulars. But I was really good in the fall of 92 of grabbing a local Hillsdale County phone book and keeping random people. on the phone calling like it was basically prank calling and try to keep them on the phone and we would circle up have 15 guys in a room one guy was in charge of the phone like hang up when it went south but that was our entertainment yeah crank calls yeah crank calls which is is that a thing anymore you can't really it's harder because of call ID when I was a little kid it was a thing we used to do that

we were really little at a back home yeah because there were still home phones and you couldn't see you know who was calling necessarily there you go but now caller ID ruined that likely spam like that It's all really nice. And I remember you could do star something, something. They couldn't see your number or whatever. So we could do that. That was just coming in on landline. We still had pay phones at the end of the hallways, right?

With calling cards to call home long distance. I mean, it was a different era. And we each suite would own one of the dudes would get, say, all right, I'll put the phone of my name, but you guys better pay me. And they get like AT&T phone and we had a phone line. And we waited a month when all, everyone on campus had their phone line. So if we were three roommates, we got a phone line. we'd probably make him do it, right?

Pay for the phone. And then we may or may not pay him, hold it over. I'm not going to pay him. But then, and then you would say, all right, here's the new directory. And here's their local 437-22-5-8. You know, everyone had one of those numbers, a 4-37 or a 4-39 number and their pitcher in a little directory. And so it was a different day.

But I'd say I laugh about that first-year freshman year, torturing the RAs. And that's why my buddies would say, You're the dean of men? Like you're, they made you the dean of men? It wasn't in the tone. The guys always, like, you know, it wasn't because I was particularly super naughty, but I was just, I was, I would poke the bear.

It feels like a compliment though. You wouldn't want people to be like, yeah, it makes sense. Because it's where you ended up. Because it's kind of nice to be like, it's you, really? Like the stereotype is that the, like, the nun with the sick kind of personality for like the dean.

But, I mean, you brought it up. There's a natural. mischievousness and playfulness that I think young men have and I think just trying to beat that out of them is really really destructive yeah I mean the beating's fun the beat each other up is a lot of fun it's a like the most fun you can have with another guy beats a tar out of them yeah each other up yeah and see who cries last you know he loses yeah how many fingers can we break before

I'm shocked we haven't done that yet how many are who are Who can break the most fingers before weeping? Why is it with boys, you know, like the paper, scissors, rocks. And if you lose, you got to expose your, for it. I mean, get the, you know, the licked finger smack, you know, all that stuff. It's brutal. Like girls, women don't make that stuff up, right? They don't think of those things.

We do. Women find devise much scarier ways to torture each other. Yeah. Like gossip. Like gossip and like mental psychological warfare. I've heard. I don't know. I don't know.

We don't talk to women. I've heard things, but I'm not, I'm not sure. Yeah. Well, you said you had another important culture shift you wanted to talk about. Well, I think I, I was, I was just thinking about that. I think I basically spoke to it with the tone setting. I said, come back to it. And then I went into it, right?

It's just typically like me. The tone setting all dorm rooms. Yeah. And it was. It was just kind of. So when I got here, there was still that, that kind of sense. But, you know, as a head array, I, probably as a first year RA,

I probably let too many things go. The relationship was important to me. That was my wiring. I actually took the job. I said one time to the house mom, I go, if that's what it takes to be an RA, if that's what you're looking for,

Lord have mercy, but I can be an RA. And it was funny, like I end up eating my words. I was just making a point to insult the RA in front of the house. Who's coming up here? because he was overreacting to something.

And I had lost my patient. I was probably studying for Latin exam or something like that. And so probably not my best moment. And I had apologized for my tone with her and came back later. She goes, well, I appreciate that. But actually, would you ever consider being an RA? I was like, okay. So I did two years as an RA software and junior year.

And I would say I just wanted everyone to get along. And I didn't really follow up with, you know, I probably, what do they say, look the other way, way or just didn't I just didn't want to be super cop I the pendulum swung too far the other way anyway come back head R a I did a better job I mean I felt for the age I was at or whatever perspective like I'm gonna uphold these rules the principles what we're going for but I don't need to send everyone up to the dean's office so like if I thought there was some energy in a room and maybe they're getting something wrong I'd use those landlines and they go hey what's up Pete yeah I'm just

I'm on duty to I was just and come out and hang out with you guys about 10 minutes or so and they're like you could hear people whispering in the background and you know again as dean i don't know if i still had that perfect but but what i was the goal i was trying to achieve is honor the rules and what we're after and and protect my guys in the way i best knew how at that time and i would say when i came back as dean that you know coaching and teaching that that kind of just got deeper and deeper is that, you know, I don't want to be at odds with the kids. I don't, you got to love them if you're going to lead them. I don't want to resent them because, you know, I've said there's 100 times and I still

keep doing, you know, that I didn't want that culture. And so I started kind of moving away. Like when I came in, there were three ring binders, three inch three ring binders for one academic year, like 1999 to 2000. The binder was like that. And it was just our copy of disciplinary letters. So let's say one of you guys, pick a vice. Vice?

Yeah, like so a rule. You had a beer in your room. Yeah, yeah, sure. So a beer gets in the, you had a beer can in your room. You had a beer, a bottled beer cap in your room. We wouldn't, the way things worked officially is you wouldn't go like, hey, can I talk to you. You can't have that. It was just kind of like, hey, we went in here, we searched in your room and we found,

you guys ever seen the life of Brian? Yeah. Yeah. We found a spoon, sir. If you know what I'm talking about, it was like that. We found this bottle cap, sir. You know, hey, we found this bottle cap, and it sent up the dean's office. And then there's like this template letter saying, you, you've committed, you violated whatever, the alcohol rule.

And that's a $25 fine. Second time, if it happens again, a copy of the letter goes home to your parents. And the fine will go up a little bit. And the third time, you'll be placed on social probation. There was no conversation. It was just from up on high. It was kind of the, and so I didn't want to do that anymore.

And so I started working at that. And then Dr. Arn came in, and he was very much in that vein of, you know, you know, the relationship, we got to get, you know, the honor code came and started kind of a conversation in three, four, five, and I think it finalized in 2005. But it was moving away from that,

us versus them, police kind of got you to hey love you man we're all in this together help each other out and relationship and also instead of focusing on rules focusing on goals why we're here and so you wanted it when they walked in the door that we're here about goals this is the great thing we're after and we wanted to reinforce that in the residence halls with uh here's what here's what we're after and rAs i don't need any super cops here i didn't have a lot of patience for that the other thing is I need guys with backbone. I don't need a super cop, but I need backbone.

Someone who's willing to confront someone lovingly, pull them aside. Say, hey, we need to talk, which I think we do a pretty good job at that. Right. So that's the difference. It's a good difference. Yeah. Do you think, so this shows a lot of it is about elevating and pointing out like how we as men, I think, learn best from other men a lot of the time.

Do you think that other than just your own experience, there's any men in your life that you modeled some of those leadership traits after some of those ideas of love them to lead them? Yeah. So that was a, when I was in college in maybe the early years of marriage and family, I, uh, my relationship, my, my folks split

and divorce was final in, uh, I think my freshman song. from here in high school, the junior high. So it wasn't until later that my dad and I reconnected and really was, you know, as a younger married man with, you know, or, you know, I think we have eight kids totals, right? So I think at the five kid mark, there was this really strong, powerful reconnection. But there was a gap there where I felt like, you know,

and that informs me too because I think I was probably taking too much advice from guys my own age. You want that. You need friends, you know, in this rocky kind of terrain that we try to work through growing spiritually and morally that it's you need to lock arms with somebody to help balance each other and help each other out right you need you need people you need friends your own age you need to develop that but also having an older mentor so yes I think as dean I got here and pretty quickly I went to the local catheter church saint

anthony's and I met this father Tom there and and we just hit it off and, you know, he had a lot of different life. He passed away in 18, but he was an adult child of an alcoholic of divorce. There was some abuse that went on in the family, that sort of things. I don't know the, but it was just tough stuff, right? And he had gone to a place where it was a second career to be a Catholic priest. But early in his priesthood, he got assigned to, let's say, be a... associate vicar, if you will, of an alcoholic priest.

Who's long gone, by the way, rest his soul. A good man other than that. It stirred up old issues and he was going to throw in the towel, not only a priesthood, but his life, it was gotten, he'd gotten that bad, right? But anyway, when I met him, he had gone and gotten help, transforming help and came back and just had all this wisdom. He could see things that, he just gave me.

great spiritual and practical wisdom, just like spiritual coaching. It wasn't spiritual direction in the formal sense, but it was amazing. The amount of hours I sat in the rectory and the other chair across from his, but he was a big boy. He was a big Texan, right? And, but, and then, so, and then I pieced it together with, and of course, Dr. Arn is just a tremendous teacher. And so he, when he got here, he knew he had to spend a lot of time teaching those at the first levels of the administration, you know, kind of making sure all the horses were pulling on the same direction.

So I had never studied much of Aristotle, you know, check the box, but, you know, that sort of thing. So I had a formal spiritual director of my pastor, I had Dr. Arne, I had a handful of the professors, you know, David Whalen at the time, who was our principal. provost back and then before for he was provost was bob blackstock some of my colleagues here who are you know when you get older the friend the equal footing is is is you know it's not as uh you know anyway just a ton of the faculty here right and kind of going through the same season in life with young kids and just their wisdom from their what they studied and in english history right da da science you know, whatever. And they, it's just kind of this absorption. It's almost like God sent me back here because, listen, you know, you were too focused on sports and, you know, we need a second

chance that you do, you know, get you absorb the things where Hillstone College was trying to do. But yeah, I think, I think all of it I piece together. But that, that father Tom was the one who's, who I remember coined, you got to love them if you're going to lead them. You can't be their cop, because I'd probably go to the rectory around these guys and, um, um, um, um, you. Um, you, some guy went through all Simpson dorm one night and punched out all those lights and I was out of town and then my uh punched out that's super ridiculous I mean we've there've been stuff down to the ceiling but never the lights yeah it was just he was angry and and uh I got to know that I I didn't ever 100% figure it out but I kind of knew after he laughed he had to go and he just

but later in life he end up being like a minister and things like that so I I remind that reminds me But anyway, I was coming home from something like that, and the whole dorm got fined or something like that or that. And it wasn't, I was not at the decision. I was back in Grand Rapids because my third child was coming, right? And so a decision was made. And Dr. Arn't thought, man, that's not a good decision, right? And I agreed, and we went in there, and he ended up,

I'll pay the fine. He, like, forgave the fine. He goes, I'll pay the justice that's needed there. But it was situations like that where I was like, man these guys um that was getting and i think the priest could see that i was father tom could see i was my heart was hardening towards us and he said listen man you need to change your expectations right because you're going to get more and more resentful unmet expectations leads to resentment which leads to a hardened heart then you take that hardened heart into every decision

and every relationship it's the filter through which you live your lives right and you started planting that seed with me there. And he also said, you got to love them if you're going to lead them. If you resent them, you can't lead them. They're going to know. You're not there. You're not a cop. And that was, I just remember being that.

He actually had a, it's a sofa, you know, that you always had the, you know, people coming over and sit there. My wife and I would sit there if I brought the kids or whatever, but that was kind of the, that was the hot seat, you know, closest to them. And, but that's what changed for me, right? And that was about the time I was early into my diaconal formation, you know, that sort of thing. So, but I would say Dr. Arn, all the provosts that we've had here, a lot of my faculty brethren and sisterin. I thought there was a boy's talk.

So I didn't know if I. And yeah. So I kind of pieced it together. I was just getting a lot of it's like. Being a student now, you're grabbing a lot from all of them, taking their one-liners that really resonate in your heart and your mind said, that's good advice. So long answer, short question.

Yeah. Good stuff. That's phenomenal. I mean, to kind of make it a little bit more silly again, so there's a legendary story of you going on burger runs with some of the guys. I did not, I think you did one when I was a freshman. Yeah. In Simpson.

I don't think I got to. go where did that come from well you know you know the simpson culture you know the sort of guys that live there right don't you just pity them i love them we actually are them we are them so not yet to the point of pity is it we are them or we are they we are they i believe no well we are i just want to mess with those just took my grammar final yeah yeah i think it was definitely did um yeah i think it was You know, listen, man, I would drive out. It was around commencement weekend.

And once we change the exams where, you know, reading day, I don't know what percentage of guys use the reading day, but I'm not, I don't, I'm, I'm, I've mixed feelings about it. Oh, you mean that little mini weekend we get? Yes, yes, for studying. Zero. So, anyway, we expanded that, that time. And I'm total dad in this opinion. Like, who cares?

You know, I want all their exams in one day and get them home, right? It'll make them tougher. But, you know, they're actually very good reasons to spread it out. There's GPA considerations, focus, and just kind of bring down the crucible a little bit, right? And whether or not 18 to 22-year-olds take advantage of that opportunity and wisdom, well, more work to be done there. But anyway, there was just, I remember all the Simpson guys were hanging out like the night before commencement. I think and they were just like, I don't know if they shot fireworks and I had to go talk to them. Like, what are you guys doing?

Can't shoot fireworks in the city. Thorndon, Thorndon drove around. And I came back and I was like, you guys hungry? It was like one in the morning, right? And they go, yeah? It seems like always. You're always 100%. Whatever time it was, it was still when McDonald's would stay up kind of late.

It might have been their 24-hour season. So I, because I do think it was like one or two in the morning and I'm out and I'm trying not to be cranky because Father Tom said, you got to love them if you're going to lead them, right? You got to lower your expectations. You know, stop beating them up for who they're not. They're 18 to 20, two-year-olds, right? Anyway, so I drove around the block, wore off the cranky, came back around like, you guys hungry. And they're looking to me like, yeah, like what, like he's going to throw food at us or like, yeah, where is it going? You could see.

I go, if I go to McDonald's and buy all you guys like a ton of cheeseburgers, you think you'll behave for the rest of the night? Yeah. Yeah, free food. It was literally like I had a snack behind my back. I'm going, sit, sit, sit, lay down, sit, roll over. Will you do that? You get a treat.

Good boy, get a treat. Don't tell those guys that. But anyway, that's how it started. This goes now where, don't know. And so it's just between us, right? Okay. So I went there and those, those, those, those, the people working there, the young ladies, you know, high school kids and, you know, probably like, oh my gosh, it's two in the morning, whatever it is. One of 50 cheese burgers.

And you can hear them going, 50 cheese, you know, I go, well, what's the most you can do? And I don't know. They didn't quite do 50. but 35, 40, something like that. And anyway, I brought him back. And they were like, are you the same Dean Peterson? You know, like, who is that man?

Did you sit with him and like, have a few? I think I stayed in my car. I didn't want to. We've been wanting you to come in because you did another one when we were here. I didn't get to go though. And he came by and you handed the burgers at the window

and we were all like ready for you, we had a tunnel for you to come into the lobby. We were too busy that day or something. Yeah. Next time should come in. that I did not hang out with them. I gave him the cheats. I think I ate one with them or something like I was in the car.

One of the head arrays coming, dude, this is great. I can't believe you did this, you know. Very heteret thing to say from the ones that I've known. It's awesome. Oh, man. Yeah, well, that's the one big thing you're known for. The burger runs. The burger runs.

Yeah, I'm willing to do that again. And I have less kids at home. I mean, part of the reason is like I always had something with my kids. I'm down to a. a junior in high school. And so I might be able to do, there might be more burger runs in the future. In the future, you heard it here first.

We're going to be gone. Oh, we'll be long gone. We'll be gone. I'm hungry. I'm already, yeah. I know, I'm going to burger run after the podcast. Well, we think we have a few questions.

Only if we don't. No. We have one from Wyatt. You want to ask why. Wyatt did hang out to me. We have audience, at least one audience question that I did think was important to We have a fan of the show.

Important to ask and or appropriate? It is appropriate. Appropriate and important that I think was important. We should explain who Wyatt is. Wyatt Peters, son of Dr. Jason Peters. Yes. Dr. Jason Peters, alumni of the show.

Wyatt Peters is not alumni of the show. No. asks, would you rather questions once a week on our show that are just bizarre, hilarious. We never know what to expect. So this week, you got to help us decipher this one, dude Pete. He says, would you rather get sent back to the Mesozoic period for five hours every time you hear someone talk about the Roman Empire or have to eat a whole

bar of soap twice a year. Ooh, so I'm a history major. I hear a lot of people talk about the Roman Empire a lot. So you would get thrust back into the dinosaur times for five hours daily. Daily. That's bad. Like, I would just be then. Are you going to accept the two bars of soap a year instead? I think you can like... I could get down that bar because you can eat it throughout the year. You can, you can... I mean, I'm Italian in origin, so I mean, I've gotten... soap in the mouth a number of times. What do you think? It's not tasty. Well, I mean,

I was raised on land of the lost, the original claymation and a slea stack and scary stuff. I always love dinosaurs. I would go back. Let me ask you a question. When I go, do I get zapped back and like whatever I'm holding or whomever I'm holding? Go with me.

Can I take one of my kids like one of my own children? If they're holding your hand. Yeah. And they go back and then like when I come back, I don't necessarily have to bring them back. Like, you know. Drop up. Yeah, you can leave stuff in the Mesozoic time.

Or, you know, and someone says Roman Empire, I'm back there again. I'm like, I wonder how he did. You know what I mean? Kind of go looking for him. Is that an experiment? He's a judge of the times. He's a whole caveman get up. Yeah, well, I'm thinking like Jurassic Park 3, right?

When the kid goes parasailing, he gets stuck there and he survived. I just want to know if my kids have any instinct, survive or instincts. There's a good way to, like, test him. Like, all right, you're 13 now, son. All right. Honey? Mention Rome. Mention Roe.

I was a hand to Pchoo! He gets you for five hours so you can teach him a thing or two about Mesozoic survival. But I'll tell you, you know, I think if I had to choose,

it's a 5149 game. You know, or we're in NBA basketball. I'd say it's 106 to 104. 106 going back to Mesozoic time frame. By the way, could I take Wyatt Peters with me and leave him there?

Assuming if you, you would have to be like if he holds my head grab him someone mentions yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah you could take why I mean it's why it's question

I love that guy by the way stranded in the Mesozoic because of the set of shit Wyatt wouldn't notice Wyatt's got his dad's dry sense of humor like he's very dry oh I'm sorry he's so dry

he's one of our good friends yeah yeah he's a good one so um um um oh yeah I was thinking of, although one of my favorite Christmas movies is the one of Messy Marvin and Red Rider BB Gun.

Come on, we did the thing. Christmas story. Yeah, Christmas story. And that Palmol. You should dry out, kid. Yeah, had a soothing, cool palm olive after Tate or whatever. Like, if it's that soap, I might, I don't know, depends. I get down to the line.

You know, it's just, like I said, 106 to 104. It's really close, but I probably want to go see dinosaurs. Yeah. I'm such an inconvenience. I wonder if you're sent back for five hours. your day or you're sent back, you experience five hours of Mesozoic time? No, I think it's, it's you just skip five hours of a day. Oh, that's terrible. Dude, imagine like someone rips that in the library before like a final. And you're just like, ugh. I'm now,

you miss the next five hours of stuff. I'm now in the Mesozoic. How do you email a professor about that? If you got an email and you were supposed to meet with someone, maybe an R.A. interview and they emailed you say, I was, uh, I was in the Mesozoic era. You logged into your email way back in the day. You create your email and an email is already there. Hey, I'm in the Mesozoic. I'm going to, to miss my final on January 5th, whatever. No, what I do is, I've already figured this out. Okay.

You take your smartphone with you. It won't have service, but it can take a picture. Yeah. And you take a picture like, here's my buddy, T-Rex. And, you know, and, uh, you know, that sort of thing. You just snapping shots everywhere. And you have to say this is not AI.

This is real. But they won't know that. No one will believe you. No one will believe you. Then I'll bring some poisonous plant back from there. But what if it poisons you before you can get back? Well, I wouldn't eat that. I'll say, well, you, I'll ask them.

You eat this. You can believe this is AI or not. You eat this. You know, we'll see, take a bite out of this. You got to try to get that. And you tell me if this is AI or real. Let's put a hold of those burger on the future. Think about it as a historic poison plant burger.

Yeah. These don't do that. Prehistoric veggie burgers. Oh. Dude, I would... I love... I'm a meat eater, like, just all the way. Like, I'm almost carnivore diet levels of eating meat.

We know. I would love to eat... Dinosaur? Like a dinosaur. Fully. Oh, yeah. You're a big dinosaur buff. Which one do you think is the tastiest?

That's hard to say. He knows a lot of... Wouldn't it be, like, alligator meat, quite honestly? I mean, depends. Because, I mean, if you eat a carnivore, it's going to taste like a bear or a coyote or any carnivore. It's going to taste bad. Carnivores don't taste good.

But if you eat one of the plant eaters... That could taste. Sticosaurus. Triceratops or stegosaurus could reasonably taste pretty good. Yeah. Although they're lizards. So what meat, like, are they, is that, that's not red meat? What is that?

Green? Green meat. Green meat. I learned that in biology major. Sam, I am. Green meat. Dude, you like green dinosaur egg meat. Green eggs and ham in real life.

There's some dinosaur meat. That's fantastic. I also think dinosaur would probably taste good. I feel like gator could taste okay. I've never had turkey. It's pretty good. No, I've had gator meat and I didn't know it, and that's the only way I would have eaten it.

But it's a thing. Someone tricked you? I've had it at a graduation party. Who's a graduation was this? Don't actually say the name, but this is a great, like, for a child? Like, what was his graduation party? I can, can I say a last name?

Because he'd be proud of it. Yeah, sure. Because it's not disparaging, right? It's just, it's complimentary. It's complimentary. So yes. You forced gator meat. It may or may not have been

My memory escapes me But it might have been the Cody family Oh wow So a more recent graduation party For one of the high school Yeah yeah yeah Within five six years or something like that We gotta ask back how did they

How did they get a gator in Hillsdale Michigan We don't have those I thought They're in the sewers Oh my They're in the alleged tunnel They're everywhere They're in the tunnels That don't exist

That do not exist The tunnels, yeah. They don't exist, guys. Gator ridden it. And they're at the top of the central hall. Dangerous gators down there and they'll eat you. And there's a gator out there. It's a gator.

That's fantastic. Well, sir, we're coming to the close of our show here. But as juniors who are now rising seniors, we have one year left of Hillsdale College undergraduate time with us. What's something, what's a word you would impart to us? Something you would say, make sure you do or don't do this with one year left go. Something you wish you

done that you want to give us the chance to know about any more prank ideas so one word or like a or just a thought in the big sense

I was thinking of a German word which is my new favorite word Schadenfreude We do a lot of that Yeah Yeah Are you familiar with

Shadenfreude? Laughing at other people's misfortune Taking pleasure in other people's pain or misfortune And I didn't realize I didn't realize

how much of that was in my parenting You know I mean Yes And I would Tell my kids, like, listen, listen, I know this is hard. I know you're suffering, but I want you to know it brings dad joy. Joy.

And not just like a surfacy, fleeting kind of joy, a deep, deep abiding joy. No, I was describing that to, I think, Professor Yanoga, you know, and he was like, and he said, Schadenfreude, or whatever I was describing that was taking place. He goes, I go, what's that? He goes, that's the word to describe it. It's a very specific German word. I go, really? So did you know Freud means Freud is joy?

Oh, I didn't know. Ouster Freuda, right, is Easter joy. Wow. Yeah, I was Latin. I probably should have picked up German too. All right. So the question is what? I'll make it twofold.

A word to us as rising seniors and then a word to perhaps freshmen who just finished their first year or coming in maybe as freshmen. A word to the old and award to the young of the undergraduate community. I would say for seniors. actually it's for everyone but I think discernment is hard and you shouldn't do it alone and I don't know who I want this for freshman or seniors or rising sophomores I guess for seniors um man I you know savor it um and uh but you know I'm watching I'm thinking of pendulum swings right like I don't want early senioritis but just perspective and and you know do your best but you know

make sure if you haven't get an adult mentor guy mentor right you know and I think guys talking to guys like you said at the beginning of the show was pretty helpful you know and I that's I find myself doing that more now just kind of helping guys kind of coaching guys to think through help them discern a little bit, slow down some of their, if they're thinking through something and I catch something that they hear, or that they say, I hear it and kind of like they're something that they say verbatim, I stop and go, you just said this and see how your body language changed? Like dig into that a little bit more.

You know, something like this, someone in your corner, enjoy your friends. Yeah, I'm struggling with the freshman, or the senior thing. I think because the friendships last you a long time. I guess you want to, okay, finish strong, but I guess I think of St. Francis DeSales, who said the greatest, there's no greater evil that can befall a soul apart from sin than anxiety.

Wow. So, and no greater evil than to worry. So I would say finish strong, try not to worry. And that requires humility, right? That you know that you're in God's hands the whole time. Do your best. Invite Jesus into it and do the best you can. And savor the moments, a day at a time, that sort of thing, that sort of stuff, right?

Yeah. And including friendships and, you know, those divine moments where someone enters into your life. If you're so rigid and worried about after graduation, you're going to miss it. If you're so wanting to savor it so much that you're not doing the work, that's a problem. Right. So anyway, and then for the sophomores, get some advice on where you're headed. I mean, you've been here for one year. You got a sense of the place.

For those of you who did well, don't get cocky, don't get complacent. you know, what's your next, what's your goal for sophomore year, right? Because there's a sophomore slump. It's a thing where the honeymoon's over. They don't know where they're headed and they just get lost. Sometimes they get down. So, but I would say, you know, get some help mentoring there. It's probably, I think I want to move the mentoring piece down to the sophomores and, you know,

help think through who they want to be, what they want to do because they've probably got a lot of different thoughts and on what that, what that is. So anyway. Yeah. That's great. Yeah, it's good stuff. Well, this has been a fantastic semester of boys only. I do want to take a moment as we are ending the semester and ending really the year with this episode to thank the audience as well.

You guys have been with us throughout a year and a half now. Some of you have boys only. 38 is only. Yeah, episode 38. Do you know his name? His? Mine? The audience member.

Oh, the single audience member? The only one? Just a few. James Jawski. No, I don't know. No, I actually did hear this. you reached out to me, I was like, what is this? And then as you talked to me, I was like, oh, I've heard the guys talk about this. Yeah. Yeah. It's something of it to do now.

Yeah. It's, it's spread. It's spread in like, it's an under kind of a current, though. I don't think it's spreading in this, like, high way where it's like everyone's talking about it, but it's just, it's this thing on the consciousness of the people, which is how I'd wanted, really. That's how I wanted to. We, the people. We the people. Do desire this. And we got one more year of Boys Only to share with you all, the audience. We're very excited. We will be back in August. So you will not hear from us for the next, what, 10 weeks? Unless you know us, then, then come say, hey. I have one piece of advice. Yeah. Bring someone else in. So for this year, they get used to a new voice with you guys and you keep this and going. A junior member to pass the

show on to? That is something to consider. Well, that is something to consider. Well, talk about that over the summer. Yeah, but do stay tuned. We love you all very much. much. Thank you for coming on this journey with us. And thank you, sir. Yeah, thank you for being on the show. It was great. Hope you had a great time. I did. Thank you. Everyone have a great summer. Thank you for this year of Hillsdale and this year of boys only. Yeah, just thank you guys. Take care. Be well. Love God. And do it up. Amen to that. Yuck, yuck, peace out.