WRFH/Radio Free Hillsdale 101.7 FM - Jin Ramen: A Guy's Perspective

Episode Date: June 15, 2026

*Drumroll* for the guest speaker...Patrick (Scott)! Learn about life and dating from an actual guy's perspective, and find out what questions he has for the trio!

Hey guys, welcome to Real Rock of Hours. We talk about real things and real food with real people. And today we have a very special guest. Drumroll, who is not a double X chromosome. So, yes, we are welcoming my husband Patrick to the show today. Welcome. Thank you. Glad to be here.

And to start us off, we normally share. a recipe each episode. So we thought you might want to share one of your favorite recipes. And because Patrick does not have an Asian heritage, we are making an exception for this, for this recipe. So you can talk about any food, any cuisine that you would like to share. Okay. Out of cultural respect for the show, I'm going to go with an Asian recipe. And mostly just because it's top of mind, because I made it yesterday, but Korean beef bowls. I don't know if there's an official technical name for that in Korean, but I made it last night, thanks to Lily's instructions, which are always very detailed.

And yeah, but I made it yesterday, but basically it's, you know, white and brown rice in the rice maker, and then you throw some, you cook up, your heat up, your cast iron. throw some ground beef in there, cook that in soy sauce, and then you add, let's see, garlic powder, sugar, which I did not know previous to yesterday. Never would have thought about putting sugar in. Just a pinch. I know. Everyone always says that, oh, Americans, you know, they put sugar on everything, but we would never have put sugar on ground beef.

You would. For like sloppy joes. Or if you put barbecue sauce. People put sugar in spaghetti sauce. Yeah. Who is people? A lot of people. Like look of a recipe on the other.

Yeah. Okay. Like Alabama? No, just like recipes online. Okay. They put sugar in spaghetti sauce. Well, not for me. But anyways, I would highly recommend it for the Korean beef bowls.

So that worked pretty well. And then last night I threw some frozen little carrot. Carrot. What were they? Like I freeze grated up carrots. so that you don't have to chop it and you can just stick it in any like pasta sauce or beef

and it's basically just hidden vegetables that you can't taste. Grated, okay. Yeah. Yeah. So grated carrots and then some chopped onions as well

that we had in there. And so cook that all together and then I don't know if we have sesame oil at home. I was looking around for it but I couldn't find it. Oh no.

Do we have some of them? It's like above. I looked in the spice cat it's like in a spice cat. It's like in a jar. Kianam actually gave it to me. It's just in a like a little. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Well, next time I'll definitely add sesame oil because that's a pretty, I would say, underrated Asian condiment or something like that as far as American opinions go. So that sounds really good. So I would say

that is like just an abridged version of Bebimpop, which is like Korean mixed rice, where you can have like other vegetables like, I don't know, spinach. You can like chop up, finally chop up carrots and saute those mushrooms. You have the meat and the rice and then usually like top it with a fried egg and this like gochu chung sauce. So Patrick had just like the really easy version. Did you have it with gochujung? I did. Yep. Nice. Very cool. Thanks for sharing. That's actually a very doable recipe with American ingredients. So it's also so versatile because you can add like whatever veggie you have on hand or do yeah it's super tasty regardless of what you do even even saga can make it semi good right which is very rare for saga Asian inspired dishes so definitely a good one to try

all right well for today's episode we thought having a man on the show we could answer some questions that I guess us three have only been speculating about that's five like they spend times in our episodes where we're like, wait, do guys actually do that? Or what do you guys

think about that? And unfortunately, I can't answer those questions, even though I live with one. So yeah, this is an opportunity for us to pick your brain.

You're representing half of the world's population right now. And you can also ask us some questions if you would like. Sure. We'll have mixed opinions, I'm sure.

So maybe we would represent the other half of mankind more accurately. Maybe not. Can I go first? Yeah, I'll just say as a disclaimer, it is the end of the semester. I only have so many brain cells left, so go easy on me. Go for it. Go for it. Yeah, we're all kind of broken right now. My first question, just because is particularly related to you. And it is, what is your ethnicity? Because you look, kind of Mexican-ish. You basically look like Lily. You guys look like siblings. And Lily is half Korean, and she somehow looks kind of Mexican, too. But you're definitely not half-Korean. So that's my first question. Also, as background for everyone listening. Yeah. Yeah. Give a image of yourself.

Oh, I don't know if I can do that. Yeah, I can't give an image of myself over voice. But, okay. Also, I have a theory that no one really started to say that you looked to Mexican until you started dating me. Because I would tell people that I was, you know, 1-8 to Mexican or whatever. And they're like, you know, I see it in you too, Lily. So that's just my theory. That's funny. When she wears hoops, she looks like a hoop earring. Actually, yeah, I know in high school I did.

I was dressing up. I was trying to dress up as an Arabian because I was in a play Aladdin. And everyone just kept saying I looked Hispanic because I had the gold hoops in this very specific shawl that made me look very Mexican. But yeah, my ethnicity or heritage is that way you were looking for? Yeah, I guess so. So I'm basically a motley European mix with taco seasoning thrown in. So I am one-eighth Mexican. My maternal grandmother was born in Mexico, Mexico, Mexico, Mexico.

I don't have a Spanish Mexican accent whatsoever, sir. Sorry. Should we cut that part out? Up to you. Up to you. I'll leave it to the editors. And so, yeah, one-eighth to Mexican. And then I have some German, Scottish, and Irish on my dad's side.

And then... Is that why your last name is Scott? Yes. I think that's it. I was waiting for that. I think that is And then Patrick His first name?

Yes My first name Irish plus Scottish comes from my mom's maiden name Which is Patrick So actually the Irish Yeah the Irish was from my mom's side And then Scottish and German on my dad's side

Okay Yep Nice Sorry I just thought that was a good question To start it off Next time you see Patrick See if you can tell the Mexican

Scottish Irish layers identify his boy and be like are you that guy on the podcast you know if somebody comes up to me and asks me then I'll I don't know what I'll think about

well who would like to go next I'll go this is like a fun one for my own intrigue but probably for you guys too so when guy before they asked to grow out

and after they ask the girl out like what goes in their head and then like how do you prepare for a date that i think that's the question like how do guys prepare for a date okay well i'll tell you what things looked like as far as our our first date went on my side of things and then maybe i'll be able to maybe draw some principles from that i asked lily out for the first time after uh we met each other through student ministry and then it was basically cut and dry version it was my head array in Galloway our dorm who encouraged me to ask her out. And then he was really kind of my,

I would hate to say dating coach, but that's really what it was because I did not know a lot beforehand. And so, yeah, Will, my head, array, he gave me a lot of advice, kind of walked me through the whole process. And it was really helpful. And then maybe an hour or so before, or half an hour or so before we were actually supposed to go on the date. He invited me down to his room and we prayed about it together. And so that was a sweet memory. But as for like internally, how did I mentally prepare for the date? It was a lot of just thinking about what could go wrong and then making plans to make

sure that that didn't happen. And so I was pretty afraid that I would leave my wallet at home or something like that. You know, got to look like a provider. I was afraid of that too. Yeah. I brought my wallet. Thankfully, it was not needed. I set up a Google Calendar event on my Google Calendar, just saying,

first date, don't forget wallet. And so dinged my phone. Nope, don't forget my wallet. Okay, all right, got that. So things like that. And then let's see. Yeah, I mean, I would say that there was a lot of prayer involved in that. So that was a big part of it for me.

When you ask her out, what were you thinking? I was thinking, I better say this quick because we're about to get to Lane Hall. We were crossing from our great books class in Kendall to Lane. And I... Oh, wow, that's short. Yeah, it was very short. I strategically timed it. So I would like, okay, we're right around Civil War statue, like halfway through.

I waited to where you're halfway through so we could get a little bit of space from other people. I had to say it kind of quietly, but still kind of confidently. You know, don't go, will you please go out on the door with me? Yeah, I know. Wouldn't have said yes to that. Anyway, she didn't say yes. It wasn't a straight no, but it felt like a straight no. But, yeah, there was just a lot of tactics going through my mind at that moment.

I was thinking she was going to say yes. also definitely some nerves but it was just like okay now's the time so was there like a lot of because I know girls do this a lot we have big debrief sessions whenever someone like seems interested or like ask someone out or like they go on the first date or they say or like deciding whether say yes or no like was there a lot of that on y'all's side or in my deciding to ask her out or not um and also like after she didn't give a straight answer or Was it mostly just you by yourself, just thinking about it? I'm just curious how the dynamic is different.

Yeah. I didn't really have the type of friends where I was like, hey, guys, I'm asking this girl out. Can you give me some advice? None of my friends were dating or anything like that. None of them had even asked anyone out, I think. Maybe that might be a stretch. But so I was like, yeah, I don't know if I want to come to you guys for advice on this, to be quite honest. So I think I'd talk to my parents about it once or twice.

I talk to Will about it sometimes. And then, yeah, obviously more prayer. So honestly, just prayer and then an individual mentor, not a group. Okay. Yeah. It's really funny because once a guy, like, you know, like something happened the next day, the guy literally walk in open air, all the friends of the girl will be like looking at him. Oh, no.

You know, like, that's him. That's the one who we've been talking about. Not obviously, but just so you know, we're talking about you. That's how I felt seeing any of your friends walking around. That was the case for like a solid year. Like the next year when I became an RA, my whole RA team was like, oh, I had a Latin class with him. Or, oh, yeah, no, I saw my friend is friends with him. And they all had some way of, like, clicking tabs on you.

It's like going to court and then you go on lunch break and then you see like the jury members out. and about you know, like you're looking. Better make a good impression. Stand tall, smile and wave. Yeah. But I would say for, I would say for guys who are like thinking about asking someone else, like don't stress too much about the friends. Like, be nice to them and as a nice person should, if you're a nice person.

But like, we're going to talk about, like, we love talking about these things. And we love, like, thinking about these things and whispering about them. which is kind of bad sometimes. But, like, often it's not bad things. No, it's just like, you know, like, oh, like, that's so cute. It's just something we want to talk about. So it's not necessarily a bad thing. And it's not like you're completely in the spotlight all the time.

Well, I think you make a good point because I think I was probably too concerned with what Lily's friends thought of me. You know, I was like, got to get the jury's approval or else they're going to sentence me of the electric chair in McIntyre. But yeah, I mean, ultimately it's, you know, a sign of probably good leadership if you're not as concerned with her friends' opinions as you're like, okay, it's between me, her,

and the Lord, and if I know that I'm doing this on a, you know, upstanding way, then I don't need to worry about our friends, you know, that'll come naturally. So, and if they don't like the way that I'm doing things, then that's too bad, you know. Yeah. Yeah, I think all of our friends, like Patrick,

I think that's how, you know. Good job. Yeah. You got the jury's approval. Because I know the jury didn't like you, but like, Lily, no. The 20-person jury. Lily, if your friends said, I don't think so, would you still have gone on a date or probably not? Probably not.

Okay. If I'm going to be honest, like, I will say we don't talk at the beginning stages. we didn't talk about much, but that was because we didn't know you at all. And we couldn't find your social media or anything, which that was actually a green flag. We couldn't track you down. We didn't know anyone who knew you. And so, yeah, the reason I didn't give you a clear answer and you asked was because I was so taken aback and I needed to run to Ashland to debrief. Like the debrief and the council with friends was what I wanted, I guess, in the moment.

I still have the text. All caps. Ashley, I don't know where I was at, but... I ran up to her in Saga because I happened to see her later that day. And so I think that there had been some signs that I was kind of like, oh, maybe he's a player. Like, I will just say, like, you had made a pretty good impression, but also I just didn't know you enough. So, but also I wouldn't, I don't think I would pick friends who would be that judgmental to say, don't even go on one day with him. So in that hypothetical situation, I would have.

of listen to your guys' advice, but I just don't think you would give that advice, unless you actually had, like, a super good reason why it's, like, you had some dirt on him or something. Yeah, no. The only reason we would ever tell a girl not to go on a date with a guy is, like, we have serious dirt, not even, like, some dirt, like, confirmed dirt. So, yeah. Confirm dirt. Confirm dirt.

It's like a thing. So my question is a little bit more broad. But, I mean, you can also answer it for yourself and then maybe specular. on whether your guy friends would agree. But just in terms of when a guy is looking at a girl and like not necessarily, might not necessarily be looking for a relationship, but just in the way you're living your life, like let's say you in high school or something or you in early college, what are the factors that maybe would really stand out to you according to Christian

standards in a girl that would? would make you say, yeah, that's the kind of girl I'd want to date. And more importantly, I'm curious to know, like, is there anything she could say or where or do? That would, like, especially kind of turn you away, like, like completely ruin her chances of, you know, appearing desirable. And I know first impressions shouldn't mean everything, but they do matter, especially when guys are looking at girls. Yeah. I think first impressions, first impressions especially matter for, you know, guys considering girls today because in all likelihood the girl is not going to come up and try to talk to him

and make a second impression. So that's pretty much all you're going to get. You said in high school. Well, I'm just trying to like... People who are not like... In a scenario where it's not like, I'm a guy, I'm looking for my wife, you know. But if you're just kind of like, yeah, around girls, what are things you would notice that would be like, hmm, I could date her.

or like, oh, no, you know, like, I would never consider that. Yeah. I would say, the first thing that comes to mind is, is language. Because if you have a woman or a young lady who curses, that is like somehow so much worse in our minds than a guy who curses. Obviously, both are bad. But that's just so, like, oh, wow, you're supposed to be a lady, right? You can almost see like, okay, he's a guy, just being a dumb guy.

But with a lady, it's like something's wrong here. Modesty is big. Yeah, I mean, there's just, and, you know, you can maybe turn it around for guys as well. In some cases, you know, people want to, guys want to show off their muscles or whatever, which I think girls aren't really that impressed with. I wish I didn't know you guys. Wait, can you talk about the. wolves howling.

What? This is something he told me last year. I love it. It's so funny. Sure. So this started at a retreat for an unnamed ministry. And we were at a weekend retreat with myself and a bunch of other college students. And I was, I had a part in leading the retreat.

And so I was pretty tired from leading meetings and things like that. and so the summit team was going to go out and do a little missions outing and share the gospel, and then they were going to come back, and then we were going to resume our activities. I had a bit of a cold, so I decided to stay back and take a nap. I woke up for my nap, was feeling a little bit better, and I just decided to get the blood flowing a little bit, so I just did some push-ups in the room by myself. Right then, the other guys, they come back into the room, and one of them immediately walks back and like this this is a big room right and just once you get the picture of it it's a big room

it's not meant to be a bedroom they're just a bunch of uh kind of bunks in the back like 30 feet away from the door the guys come in the door and the first guy walks in brisk briskly all the way back 30 feet back and then he goes like five feet away from me drops and stops starts doing pushups and i basically stopped doing pushups as soon as i saw them come in i was like oh i don't want to be you know like just doing pushups in front of them that's kind of odd but he just comes in and just starts doing push-ups immediately. I'm like, oh, okay. And then another guy comes in, like, sees him start doing push-offs.

So he starts doing push-ups. All of a sudden, there's two, three people doing push-ups, and I'm just like, I don't know what the heck to do. And then that happened in the bathroom later on, too? Yeah, fast-forward to next year, same retreat, same people. This retreat and got some issue. No, I'm sorry. we're in this you know it's this retreat bathroom it's you know kind of gross nasty floor stuff like that

I didn't start it this time I was just brushing my teeth and then one of the guys just gets down and starts doing push-ups on the gross bathroom floor and I just I just kind of look at him and I keep brushing my teeth and another one does it and so I told that to lily and she's like wow it's just like you know wolves howling as soon as one one does it well it's a fascinating phenomenon and I've noticed it too like if one guy starts doing pull-ups you know they all start lining up and like one guy takes a shirt off the other ones follow and it's just like this instinct they have

and it's like really weird and I noticed this the other day at a bonfire too because one guy would add wood to the fire mind you it was like 70, 80 degrees that day we don't even need a fire and then like one of the girls is like hey like maybe let's not add more because like it's going to be hot and he's like okay another guy walks up

grabs the chunk of wood puts it in the fire and they're all trying to like It's just like somehow something they can't help. Anyways, sorry about the tangent. You're talking about guys showing up their muscles and modesty. So with women, it's the same thing. You know, wearing revealing clothing. You know, to some guys that's going to be attractive, unfortunately.

And to the guys that you kind of want to have them, you know, attracted to you, that's not the way to go. Kind of go the opposite route, in fact, almost not saying you need to wear a burqa and like not a single square inch of your... show, but yeah, just modesty is good. One of my high school teachers, who was a marketing teacher, his wife, his wife said, told me something that she recommended young girls to think about. She said that, don't advertise anything you're not willing to sell. So I thought that was pretty good, especially as a

marketer's wife. But yeah. So what, I guess those are, those could go either way. Like, you're attracted to modesty, kind of deterred away from immodesty. Are there, I guess, I guess maybe that's all you can get from first impressions, but are there any more like specific, maybe actions or like, are there other ways you can kind of get a first impression from a girl? Or is it really just kind of those appearance-based things? I mean, I would say just, uh, maybe this is just for me, but I would say probably most guys. I would say that we're attracted to, you know, a tender, graceful spirit. I think, you know, one of Paul's letters talks about that a lot.

You know, young women are, you know, to be, I don't even know the passage, but it's something along those lines. You mean like the outward adornment versus the gentle and quiet spirit? Yes, gentle and quiet spirit. There you go. Yeah, so I think that that's something that can stand out, even though, you know, it's not flashy. But I think because so much the world is trying to be flashy to stand out, and that's an identity issue. all of a sudden the thing that stands out is a thing that's different and the thing that's different as someone with a woman with a gentle and quiet spirit.

I liked the point, because I never thought of it before, the point about not cursing. Because I think nowadays in this culture, it's kind of a cool thing to curse almost. And a lot of girls pick up on it just because everyone around them is doing it. And I think that also comes from a semi-southern standpoint. Like, as a lady, you should not be cursing. But, yeah, I like it, though. It's like, it's something I hadn't really thought about. Because that also ties in with the gentle and quiet spirit in a way.

So, yeah. And I suppose that's something you can tell regardless of what they're talking about. Yeah. Because people who swear, kind of like, it just mixes in all their language. So whether they're, you know, in a personal conversation with you or you overhear them talking with someone else, I think that's an easy way to kind of get that impression of them. Yeah, I mean, you act in. dress and look the way that you want your, you know, boyfriend or future boyfriend or future husband

to treat you. Like if you're, you know, a sorority girl who parties all the time and just drinks a ton or something, all that stuff, nothing against sorority girls, just using it as an example. And that, you know, the signal you're sending is that that's maybe how you feel like you should be treated in the future is like someone who just, you know, parties and gets drunk all the time and stuff like that. And I don't think you really actually want that. You know, I think you want to be treated like a dignified, you know, a dignified woman with a gentle and quiet spirit. I do have some questions for you guys. Oh, okay. First question and take time to think about it. What is a distinctly female thing to daydream about? And I'll give you a guy's example because guys, for men, we want to be the

heroes. So it's a lot of times we're daydreaming about being in a dangerous situation or something like that and coming in and saving the day, you know, really dramatic stuff may or may don't involve a damsel in distress. What is what is the equivalent for for women? Can I can I say? Okay. It didn't take me much to me. Just as you guys daydream about being the hero to the damsel and distress, We often daydream about being the damsel and having a hero come save us. So I think that's a distinctly female thing to daydream about. When you picture your knight in shining armor, what are the characteristics? Not in shining armor, definitely not.

Just like a normal handsome tall guy. Those listen up. Yeah. And like, it's like, oh, something happened. or whatever and we're in entire need and then they like come in and save us at the last minute so okay yeah how dramatic is this situation

not that dramatic is it like it can be dramatic really I was gonna say because like I know you daydream about like the school shooter incident or whatever and like what you would do oh yeah we would daydream like I would daydream about that too but more about how I would hide not how I would hide

and then this guy takes the bullet for us yeah then he's dead you can't date him No, no, it's a bullet that doesn't kill him. Yeah, just like in the eye or something. And then you have to, like, go in the ambulance with him. And then he's like in a cone. No. No, we're more like, like you help him with the first aid part of the thing before he got into.

Like, you know, like wrap him up in Band-Aid, I don't know. CPR, not to the CPR. Yeah. Yeah. Did you guys have any others? I literally daydream about, well, this is really funny. But, like, sometimes it'll be like, there. is like a certain situation ship and I'm like I wonder you know like thinking like you play a lot of

scenarios out in your own head of how this like this could play out I guess that's what I daydream about wow all the possibility like I think because we're overthinkers yes we're overthinkers I like you know something happened and I okay I literally this happened recently it was like in convocation okay and I was just thinking about something and I was like oh I wonder oh I wonder and then you know and then Dr. Arnd said something about um we're gonna get um what's I call compensation for Alzheimer's and then I said she's like money money I do yeah I do think for every like one day dream a guy has like we have like 10 million thoughts that may be included a daydream but we also have like you know thinking a million possible scenarios

I feel like we rerun conversations a lot in our house and think about what we could say differently or like how that would change the course of events. Thinking about our schedule, you know, what we're doing for the day. Food. Yeah. Or like you've seen an Instagram real and you're like, oh, that would have tasted so good right now and then you think about it. Actually, the food thing might be just kind of specific. Yeah.

Yeah. Okay. Good answers. Good question. Do you want to ask another one or I have one for you too? Oh, yeah, fire away. But mine's a little bit more deep, I guess. Okay.

Can I ask a fun one before you do that? Yeah, go for you. Do you think about the Roman Empire? No. Okay. What is your Roman Empire? I don't even know what that means. Seriously?

Like, oh, what is the thing I think about all the time? Yeah, what's that thing? Well, you of course. Oh, good answer. Yeah. So my question is, I guess this can be just your opinion, but there's a lot of, we as girls have a lot of expectations on like how a guy should pursue us or how we should let a guy pursue us and what pursuing even means.

Like basically how much the girl is involved in that process of like whether she's the first to start the conversation or whether she should just like, stand in a corner and wait for a guy to come and do all the work. So do you have thoughts on that of kind of like how much? I remember when we were dating, reciprocality was kind of a thing you brought up between us. So do you have thoughts on that of like, what's the ratio of like a guy still taking responsibility and doing the work to pursue a girl,

but then also where what's the girl's role in that? Good question. and I think I would probably say something different than I would have when I was first dating you. I would say that what guys need to hear is that they should be 100% responsible for going out there and, you know, pursuing the lady. And then guys close your ears. What ladies need to hear is that maybe you need to help out with that. And maybe you need to be 20% responsible on your end for something. things, at least just make it easy.

I think it was, you know, one of our pastors' wives who said that, you know, as in marriage, the woman, the wife should be the helper. And, you know, you can start working on that now if you're not dating. You know, like, okay, you have someone you want to, you know, think, oh, they might be good husband material. Help him out. You know, make yourself available. And all the girls who complain coming home from, you know, swing club night, like,

oh, why didn't you ask me to dance? Well, it was because you're hanging out with 20 of your friends and you were in a closed circle. Like, there aren't many guys that are going to have the guts to take on 20, 20 ladies just to get one of them. But, um, so I would say that's a big one is, uh, yeah, watch the amount of time that you spend with your friends and, and kind of the group body language or just your individual body language is important,

um, showing that you're, you know, available and interested and curious and, you know, open to, open to things. You're not closed off. You're not just like facing a corner with two of your girlfriends. Getty. Yeah. And just, you know, every now and then, you know, like, you're at an event, just kind of move around. Don't just stay in one place all the time, you know, move around, you know, that gives the guy opportunity to make some kind of a move.

That's kind of more general advice than specific, but, or meant to be general. But yeah. Okay, fun question. Do you like, when people are dating, do they, like, showcasing some of the chat wife traditional thing before you get into everyone. Yes, I get that. I like your accent right now. The sentiment of like, like acts of service.

You got the nails salon down. Yeah. No, I was just like curious because like Patrick's at like 80%. So like he's paying all the meals. He's taking like, you know, you on dates and stuff like that. the 20% like to me that would be like you know i would say probably like cooking or if they're sick like bringing them medicine which also like the guys would do to the girls too and things like that those are small things yeah yeah and lily would do stuff for that like that when you know if i had a

if i had some sickness which is very frequent living in the guys dorm with community bathrooms um that was pretty frequent so she would you know bring me food and and vice versa and stuff like that so that was always helpful. And that was after we were dating, just to add that. This is all post-dating. You would never. Yeah. All right, I'll ask you another one if we have time. So maybe this is just coming from a guy's perspective, but I've heard a lot about, you know, guys needing, husbands needing to love their wives and what all that means and how we should do that. But I haven't heard a lot about, you know, training for young women to learn to respect their husbands. I've been wondering if you guys grew up learning anything from that, from your parents or your churches, and just kind of what

that looks like to you. I think for me when I was little, even when like my dad's say something, not like completely correct, we don't ever correct him in public. I guess that's like one of the biggest things. Like my mom don't really have a lot of like big rules for me, but I guess like don't ever like disagree with your dads or your brothers in public like all of it can be dealt at home so like show that kind of respect i i'm assuming just like you know my dad often would not say something it's just more of like dad you know you shouldn't say that like don't say that i'm single and you know stuff like that you know like not that it matters but um he's like yeah no like she's not dating anyone like you know that kind of thing i'm like oversharing kind of and you're like no dad but then you wouldn't

You just smile really pretty and just, you know, carry on with your day. So I guess that's what I would do. But yeah, I guess both my mom and dad are very opinionated people. And that's good because they really stand for what they think it was right and, you know, what they think the Bible says. But they disagree a lot sometimes because they both have very strong opinions about specific issues. But even though we knew as kids that my mom, like, didn't agree with. something to the same extent my dad did, she would always defer to him at the end. Like, he had the final say.

And so it was interesting to see that because it shows that there's enough respect that even though you have a really strong opinion, otherwise, you're still willing to let him have the final say. I guess, like, in front of the kids, you need to clear boundaries of who is, like, setting the rules and, like, you know, like, don't overstep each other boundaries. That's my family, like, you know, like, somebody have a clear, like, my dad is obviously, you know, like the head of the household. so you let him have the final say.

Yeah, I mean, I don't have a ton to add to that. I mean, I saw the same thing growing up of, you know, it's easy for you to respect your dad and for your mom to respect her husband when he makes like a really wise, rational, just kind of good decision that like anyone would agree with. But then, you know, one day my dad came to me and he's like, you know Lily I think now that you're in high school I think you're old enough to not wear shorts anymore

and I was like what like I was in sports I was like you know like I mean at this point in this day and age a girl is will wear shorts like I thought he was condemning me to wear pants for the rest of my life um and my mom like that just seemed really crazy to me and I just wanted to lash out and like just kind of like almost you know question his absurdity kind of what Kienom was talking about, just calling them out right then and there. And in those kinds of instances, my mom wouldn't be like, Eric, that's like preposterous, that's crazy.

But she would support him and like, obviously that will change. Like, I don't have to wear pants all the time or I didn't have to in high school. But, like, it wasn't just like something really hasty, I think. Maybe that's what you guys are getting at. Like, there's not, like, an immediate,

response of opposition and like I think your default should be to support the head of the household and always like try to see the wisdom that he has and the authority that he has. So yeah, that's kind of an extreme example, but like I think it was those extreme cases where I really saw the respect my mom had for my dad. Like obviously she didn't agree with that. And like we all talked about it. And so like with dating rules and things like that, like he would say some things. And I would want to just like, yeah, immediately disagree. But seeing my mom's response.

And my mom and dad are also very opinionated. So seeing her be able to sit in kind of just like have that default of love towards him was, I think, very impactful growing up. Good answers. Yeah, and also like she gave me a lot of advice before getting married of just like, I guess more concrete, which I realized I had seen her living out. Like, um, I can't remember all of it, but like the general gist of like, you know, the wife is the helper. So she's there to support her husband. And like he needs support usually when people are disagreeing or not backing him up, which is probably an instance where you wouldn't be doing that either. So it's the times when the least amount of people disagree with him.

As long as it's not like a sin issue, like that you, this is where you step in. And like, this is your role of being a support to him. Yeah. Yeah, I definitely agree with that. And especially thinking about, you know, having kids in the future. If I were to say something like, oh, no, you. Kids, you can't do this. And then my wife were to come up, like you were to come up.

me and be like oh no yes they can that would be like boom like all of a sudden we've got a major authority issue here in the home and that's yeah could be pretty catastrophic for the family and the kids so yeah kids are way too smart they would they would work that machine out yeah yeah yeah but mom's yeah i mean we've all done that even with even with parents even when parents were like strict about they are good about it yeah yeah there's always like who do you think will be most likely to allow me to do this thing and thus who do i ask so true you test out the water outside of the hearing of the other one you test out the water kind of feed it to them a little bit and then you pick like oh this person seemed very open to this idea let's pitch it you know right yeah can i go on a picnic this

weekend with my you know that kind of thing and like no go and then you're like please and then you know it never works but usually my parents are like what do the other one things you know before they say anything and then I'm like oh man I have to go to that the other one it never works well thank you Patrick for being our guest today thanks for coming yeah it's always interesting to talk to a Mexican man what was it European flavor with taco seasoning yes the taco seasoning as a little bit of spice to the conversation. Not too spicy. Yeah.

Yeah. At least I don't think you gave any hauntakes. Did he? He probably, we kept it pretty. Yeah. Pretty solid. Pretty good. Pretty solid advice.

Yeah. Well, thanks for joining us today. Yeah, it's fun. Now go home with your wife and enjoy a delicious meal. We're having taco bowls tonight, guys. Who's cooking? I will probably have to cook together because we're going to be short on time tonight. Okay.

Like he'll do the meat. I'll do the rice, whatever, you know. Because we don't do well when we're actually working on the same thing together. Anyways, sorry, I'm getting sidetracked. Enjoy that delicious meal with a loved one with a friend tonight. And we'll see you next time. See you next time. Bye.