WRFH/Radio Free Hillsdale 101.7 FM - On the Back Burner | Boys Only #21

Episode Date: November 8, 2025

Nate and Storm chat with Josh Underwood about Beowulf, inter-dorm culture, and the military industrial complex's intersection with facial hair.

Nate, I've been smoking since last week. I can tell. You have two? Yep. Okay. I've been smoking those good men for cigarettes. How was... Those good men's on cigarette?

North Vine. This is another episode. A boy's only. With me, Thor Drexler. Me, Nate Gallagher. And I'm going to repeat the title one time. It's boys only. Why do we do this?

I don't know, they're normally not that corny. I promise you, the episodes are not that bad. I come up with what we're going to do at the start seconds before I start speaking. Yeah, that was slightly terrifying. Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's okay. But as usual, we have a guest, and his name is... Speaking of terrifying. Joshua Underwood.

Oh, full legal name drop. Well, Joshua Robert. Oh, there you go. How distinguished. Do you want us to call you Joshua? No, no, no, no. Good, Josh. Can I call you Junder? Yeah, you can call me Junder, of course, yeah. That's nice. Who are you? What do you do? Why do I know you? I am a junior and are you from. I'm from Austin and one fun fact about me is, uh, I have a bobblehead of myself that my mom got for me. Well, that's sweet. Yeah. A bobblehead of yourself? That's so like, you, mine are the iconic face. Yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah. In the best way possible, seriously. Yeah, recently I've been working on like getting a, uh, full on art collection. I've been collecting. Um, I've been collecting. Bobbles, physical things.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Little bits and bobs is lovely. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Why would the average Hillsdale know you? Yeah, okay, so freshman year, I won a little pageant called Mr. Hillsdale. I kind of forgot about that. There's still people on this campus who only refer to me as Mr. Hillsdale. They don't actually use my name.

So I sang a fun little parody song of I love women, or excuse me, of whatever the band is. I like candy. I want candy. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. We don't love women here. This is boys only. We love them, but they distance. Of course, of course, of course.

Okay, okay. Yeah, but I won that. And then I also do theater. I'm in plays. Were you in the last play? No, I was not. Yeah, I'm in the upcoming play. Which is.

Opening on Wednesday, it's the Book of Will. Oh, my. This Wednesday. This Wednesday. Give us a little teaser. What's that all about? Yeah, no, it's good. It's going to be about compiling William Shakespeare's works after he died.

So, you know, at the time, they didn't have copyright or anything. And he never actually wrote down his work, like, in a book. Right. So, and at the time, again, no copyright, right? So whoever prints the stuff first kind of gets the rights to whatever the play is, even if it's like a bastardized horrible version, which is what was passing around at the time. So in the play, it opens with, like, one of the, like, the main actor for the king's men, Richard Burbage.

He gives a bunch of speeches. Burbage. Burbage. Yes. Burbage. He dies. And then all the rest of William Shakespeare's friends are like, oh my gosh,

he knew most of the speeches by memory, and we don't have any of that, right? So we've got to piece it back together and make sure that we can get the, you know, authoritative version of Shakespeare, which was, you know, their friend, right? So, like, beyond just being Shakespeare, they want to preserve their friend's work, so.

I've been told that it's a theory that he was multiple people, writing under an alias. What do you think of it? Purbidge or Shakespeare? Yeah, the guy on the stage is writing under multiple. No, Shakespeare. Because he's never spelled his name the same way. It was some, like, weird evidence.

Yeah, but, like, everybody at the time wasn't spelling their name the same way twice. So, like, I mean, I don't know what to tell you. Don't buy it? He has, no, I don't. He has baptismal records, which is more than most people have from the time. You know, and a lot of, like, you know, public reactions and reviews of his work, right? So, like, it's pretty clear that they had, like, someone who was, you know, operating, at least under that name, like, an individual who was well known. But, yeah, like, I don't buy that.

That's insane. Yeah. I get it. I like to think, because people are like, oh, he's the other one guy, or there's a bunch of people writing all this stuff. I like to think it was two guys. William and William and William Shakespeare. And William, and his friend Pierre. Yeah, William.

If you'd like to shake Spears, waggle my biography, as Julius Caesar once said. I don't think Caesar said, oh, yeah, yeah, come on, come on, you got to have these. This is, that is a deep pole. If anyone gets that, I don't actually, genuinely, completely surprised. Can you explain the joke name? Not in any way that is quick. One William Shaking Spears. Yeah.

One William. I'm sorry. Before we get into like questions and stuff, you set down some sort of strange object on the table in front of me. It's orange. And I've been trying to decipher what it is. Let me try to, before you say it is, for the audience, it's an orangeish yellow-cased thing.

It seems to have some sort of charging output. A camera. It almost appears like a, there's a button or a dial or a knob on the side. It appears like a small phone. Small phone or camera. Do-Hickey of some sort. A giz- An object. Oh, and there's a screen.

Oh, there's a screen. Is that an iPod? Is that your phone? Is a phone? Yes, exactly. I know. It's kind of surprising. This is a, uh, can I say the name on air?

Is that cool? As long as I'm not like, you know, advertising for it. It's a light phone. Okay, so it's a dumb phone. I recently switched back because, uh, I hate scrolling. Scrolling is like the bane of my existence. And I just automatically do it when I have my iPhone. So I decided to switch over.

I got this for, uh, actually last, Christmas. But they were so backed up on pre-orders that I only actually got it in October. But I just switched over, you know, to stop the clash, stop the reels. Wait, this is so huge for the business. I haven't looked back yet, so. It's fantastic. Is that why your text are now green? Yes, that's why. My text are green. Yeah, yeah. Because I'm texting Josh to set them up for the interview and their blue text on the way back. Why Apple knows exactly what they're doing. They make those green, that green color, the most ugly color on the planet. You know, this is really nice.

nerdy and a little fun fact. No, no, no, no, run it, run out. So, they did a study on literally the ugliest possible color. Mm-hmm. And Australia mandated that all cigarette packages be, like, made in that color. It's like a throw-upy green-brown mix. Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's so gross.

It just looks... Hey, you're kind of talking about my favorite color right now. Are you seriously? Yeah, yeah. You like that color? Yeah, when I was, like, five, I mean, like, look at my jacket right here. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. It's not green.

Your jacket is, like, vibrant, vibrant, verdid, verdity. little green. Let me just find it really quick. Here, you guys talk about something until I can find this on my phone. Yeah, yeah. So, it has all the same capacities but no Instagram. Yeah, so, I mean, Flash Royale. Let's look. I got an alarm. I've got

a camera, which they didn't have on the previous version. I did have a light phone too for a little bit. I think camera is one of the more important phone features. Oh, yeah. Camera and alarm. Alarm is close. You got to buy an alarm. I don't have to buy an alarm. If not. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Calculator. Calendar

Directions Directory Hot spot Cause you just turned in the episode Calc store for calculator Podcasts Just use this line Not my boys only

Podcasts Oh this is huge No I actually don't have that set up yet But maybe I will You need to I don't think whatever service that is Can you get Spotify? They're working on like Spotify stuff

Right now but no It's like an MP3 player I gotta like download it on So Okay This by the way guys Is the color that I'm talking about I don't know if I did a good job

describing it But like it's just very ugly And it's nothing like your lovely jacket And just picture it Picture the literally the most disgusting color Like brown, green, dark Like soupy Yeah

From the land down junder Think about a color that would make you not One of my cigarettes Yeah The land down gender Speaking of the land down gender Speaking of the land down junder People want to know a lot about you

Yeah People want to know Nick Good friend of the show Alumniists We actually have had multiple Nick Who are alumnus of the show Nick Rukowski That Nick

Are you flourishing? Yeah, no, I would say so. Today I am flourishing. I just finished a paper on Beowulf. It was pretty long. I'm in a play that I enjoy, you know. I've got a lot of things going for me. I've stopped scrolling, which is nice.

This is good. You know, only as of like three days ago, so like check back in with me later. But like... Which is your favorite Beowulf monster of the three? Oh, that's a good question. The first one's so, not Gretchen. Grendel? Grendel.

My mother-in-law. Beowell first his mother-in-law. We didn't read that in great books. We did the Greek stuff and then a confession. Yeah, grundle. Grundle. The dragon has so much hype building up to it, but I feel like in terms of actual battle,

Beowell first, the grundle is like. The grundle. Isn't it grondle? It is grindle. It is grindle. It is grindle. It is grindle. The grondle.

Man, I got to think about that. Probably Grindle. because there's like a lot of interesting stuff in the old English where it's like okay wait wait I'm gonna change my answer I'm gonna change my answer to something that's like subverts expectations my favorite monster is

Bayowulf oh okay how enlightened a election we have an English major here so you gotta elaborate elaborate I don't want to just like walk you through the paper I just wrote especially because it wasn't like that great but like the four sentence summary yeah okay okay so basically

you know Kane and Abel right yeah Kane kills Abel and then as part of his punishment God like makes monsters show up which is kind of weird in the poem but that's what happens um but cane is called an edge bonon which means a like sword killer sword yeah right yeah sword with a sword killer with a sword yeah okay and like in genesis swords don't show up like any sort of like forging or metallurgy until like four generations after cane so like the poet's doing something very specific there um so like beowulf over and over again is killing people and stuff with swords right

like over and over. And if you go look at like the descriptions of each sword, it kind of becomes clear that well, lo and behold, he becomes the monster by the end, the real monster. Oh my gosh.

In certain respects. I mean, some professors or other English majors who enjoyed that poem and maybe have paid more attention than he might, you know, counter that thesis, but I was trying to be a little,

a little provocative there. Yeah. What was the word you used for sword killer? Edge Benon, ECG-B-A-N-A-N. Isn't that vague? similar. I might be thinking of something else, too, the name of one of his swords. No, but...

No, no, no. I know what you're thinking of, though. I know what you're thinking of. What am I thinking of? So, his dad's name, this is another little detail that hopefully Dr. Jackson appreciates. But his dad's name is Edge Thayal, which means sword slave, literally like sword slave. Okay. He is the son of a sword slave and he uses swords for sword purposes, right? He's a slave to violence. Oh, my God. Which is interesting. Which is interesting. I don't think we learned so much about Beowulf on this. I want to write that down. Don't get that down for Beowel.

Fact check me on that. Fact check me on that. But yeah, that was interesting. And then also, you know, Unferth, do you know about this guy? I guess you didn't read it. Is he like the friend? He saves from drowning. I read this in maybe 10th grade.

Unferth is, so, you know, Bayowulf shows up at Hrothgar's, you know, he goes across the ocean, shows up at Hrothgar's hall. And then inside of Hrothgar's hall, there's this guy named Unfer. Oh, is he like the conniving guy? Yeah. killer who like makes fun at Beowulf and he gets totally shut up. Yeah.

Yeah. Minds said about three feet to my left. Yeah, yeah, I was going to say, let's all go around the circle and Sarah in Forth. Storm. That's not the left, that's not. The listeners don't know. Yes, they do. We take a picture every single episode. Please continue that.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Unferth, his name literally means like unpeace. But get this, okay. His dad's name is Edgeloff, which means sword legacy. I know, I know. Yeah, I know, yeah. That's the kind of the thing I was picking up on. But his name is Sword Legacy.

So literally the thing that is left by the sword is a guy named Unpeace or Un-Life. Yeah, I know. Wow. I know. You can't say, but I'm literally like my mouth is open. Like a gasp. I know.

We're not even looking at the Old English right now. This is awesome. Mm-hmm. I have a, we have a friend who I can't tell you how long ago now, did a class in Middle English. Okay. Like all of the readings were in Middle English. Is that?

like yeah so is that what are you thinking about that because this is fascinating stuff isn't it so cool yeah um no but in english 310 there's a big stress on um going into the original languages like you're not going to learn and become fluent in old english because it's like basically a foreign language it's you know kind of like high old german so it's like you're not going to speak it like you'll pick up on some words that you recognize here and there but like um you're not going to speak it but you are expected you know get familiar with the syntax and be able to know how to translate and make those choices well because translators impose their own meaning

whenever they're presenting it to someone else because like, you know, your average high school kid who gets assigned, Beowulf isn't going to learn the Old English and go back and do it themselves, right? But like in college here, you're expected to do that. Shout out Hillsdale College. Yeah, exactly. I love languages so much.

Old English is so fascinating to me because it's so weirdly interesting. Yeah. Kind of Germany, French, own thing. It's so awesome You should read stuff in Norman Oh yeah

Norman Oh my Victor Is a big like old French Middle French guy Okay Talk to Victor about some of that stuff Yeah and that plays into old English a lot too Some old French stuff

So it's fascinating stuff That was such a great man Yeah I love that That was awesome Three word question Are you flourishing And we get all that

Awesome Thanks Nick Would you rather All right I guess you should say Who's asking this question Sorry Oh is it would you rather

Is it Wyatt? No No, no, no, this is from Aden. Oh, Aiden, okay. Bauer. Bauer. Yes, no, not the alumnus, Aden. Would you rather be the leader of Texas or the mascot?

Oh. So, like, are you the president of the Houston Texans, or are you, like, the bull? Oh. Wait, is he asking about the state or the team? No, it's the state. It's the state. I'm putting it in an allegorical form. The key or the jester.

Hmm. I mean, I think the Jack or the king. Yeah, there's actually just king. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Or the game. I got to think about that because I'm kind of already like the president of Texas

at least up here. Who is the governor? Yeah, it's Greg Abbott. Yeah. Okay. He's all right. Yeah, I like him. But I would probably prefer to be the jester

because I don't think that's a little above my pay grade. But you know, as long as I'm here in Hillsdale, like I'll be running the Texas club. You know, like that's my question. Yeah, talk about that. Talk about Texas. Yeah, yeah.

So, you know, coming up here to Michigan, I really had never, you know, spent more than a couple weeks in the snow. It gets depressing. It gets depressing. Because you're from New York. Yeah. We don't get a lot of snow. Georgia.

Georgia. Oh, my gosh. Right. In Atlanta. Oh, yeah. Uh-huh. So you know. You get this. Oh, it's the worst.

But it gets a little depressing. Like, it's a beautiful, beautiful place. Like, don't get me wrong. Like, I love Michigan. Like, today. Oh, yeah. But, you know, some of these. The fall colors going.

And then all the leaves are gone. And it's just scraggly. Like, gray death. Great death. But when that first snowfalls is really nice. It's like that nice blanket. It's true. Then it's just days.

Anyway, please continue, Josh. Mort's. Yeah, so my whole goal has been, since I got up here, was to, you know, import a little bit of that sunshine from Texas. It's not everybody's cup of tea, but I think, you know, taking pride in your state is something that's very important. You know, Texas kind of leads the way in that,

and we're a little obnoxious. Texas is, but like, probably top five states of the union. Yeah, yeah, for sure. They're like number four for me. Mm-hmm. That's high. Number four. High honor.

What was above that? New York and... Florida. Florida. I also like Cali. Respectfully, the politics are the worst thing ever, but it's quite literally paradise on Earth. That's true.

So, I've actually been there. But Texas is, the Texas fly, the Texan flag is the only one that can fly as high as the American flag. Oh yeah. It's so true. And that whole republic thing you guys tried, pretty awesome.

Fighting the Mexicans. Yep. I liked that. I thought that was awesome. Did you forget? Did you forget? I've never, I've never once forgot the Alamo. I actually have a mental stimulus reminder.

Every, Every 10 minutes of the alamo just hits me like, boom. Good, same, same. My eyes. I'm talking about adding a moment of silence at every Texas event for the alamo. Yeah, yeah. You know, we have our own state pledge too, right? State pledge.

Like flag pledge that we say at school every day. Oh, are you for real? Yeah, no, for real. Can you, can you, is that legal? Can you recite that? Yeah, it's a pledge. Can you let it read? I'm out of my, you know, out of my homeland.

Oh, guys, I'm going to embarrass myself. I shouldn't have brought this up because I don't know it. To-he-ha-hout-a-p-to-you-wood, dear. Down there, that Dix is there. All I know is that it starts, honor the Texas flag, and then I forget everything else past that. And then it's the entire Texas song by Big X the Ploss. That's right, yeah. Just lists every person from Texas ever, all like, probably millions.

We also have our own anthem, so. I think most states have a state. Well, okay, as the guy who did state fact for a year and a half, every single state has their own state song. Oh, okay. Some are worse than others, like, Some of them are just like some random country song. We got the number one state song. Which one is yours?

The song, Georgia. By Georgia. That one. Oh, that is a good one. It's elite, yeah. But Midnight Train to Georgia is so much better. It is a better song, but we still win. No one else has a song that fits their state as wonderfully as ours fits ours.

I mean, New York, New York by Frank Snottcher. It's pretty hard to beat. Yeah, it's pretty good. I don't think it's official. I don't think it's like official, but I mean, Texas, we're talking about three of the best state song like, gang. Yeah, really. We've not had a lot of Texans on.

We've had Henry. Henry last time. Yeah. It's good. We got to get back down south for these people, and I like you guys from the south. Dude, there's, uh, now I think we're the third most admitted state. So we're winning. We're taking over here.

Most admitted? Yeah, yeah. As, as a, no, no, yeah, at Hillsdale, as of a proportion of like the previous freshman class, we're number three. It goes Michigan, Ohio, and then us, I think. Wow. Cool. That's, I would not, I would not say that as the third.

I'd probably give you, like, an Illinois or a Wisconsin. You'd expect you. You guys beat Wisconsin? Yeah, we have now, yeah. We got a lot of cheese heads. A lot of cheese heads. You know we got, don't got a lot of New Yorkers. Who else?

Angel. Yeah. Well, we have more upstaters. We have a couple upstaters. Jackson Casey. Yeah, yeah. Brian Curtin, you know who? I don't think I'm from Yonkers, I think.

Yonkers? That counts is downstate. Yonkers? That gets hotly debated, is Yonkers downstead or upstate? I claim yongers, I think that's their us. Because they have the accent. They talk like us. So they count.

That was a good question again. We're having some great ones, man. I'm so happy. This is from Olivia and Violet. Okay. What can you tell about your quote, in air quotes, little pet project that's been on the back burner and quotes. Your little pet project is put on the back burner?

I feel like I remember this as some kind of like joke. It is a joke. It's an archetypal joke. Did I, do you, so you're familiar-ish, Kind of, did I ever tell this to you, Storm, at all? No. Your back project, your secret. Tell it to us.

On the back, we're totally fresh. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So I'll start from a 10,000 foot view. 10,000 BC. So, you know, actually in 10,000 BC, you know, some Chinese emperors search for, like, the elixir of life or how to turn, like, lead into gold, you know, and, like, to give you a Western example, people search for the Holy Grail, right? Yeah.

For me, I've been searching for, like, the perfect joke to adapt to any circumstance. dance. Oh. So my little pet project kind of runs like this. On the back burner. On the back burner. You know, just something I've been working on a little bit. Um, on the back burner. Sorry. Essentially, you know, we've got, um, uh, I've got this character that I'm working on. Okay. His name's Joseph. He journals every day. Sort of sort of takes, you know, like, stock of his life, what's going on, daily events. He, uh, goes to this little college called, um, Hillside University. Hillside. Yeah. Hillside University. So, Just before we proceed any further, I want to let you know, there's going to be a big twist at the end.

Okay, big twist at the end that you won't see coming. I'm ready. Once the pet project has been explained, you know, again, still in the back burner, in progress. But this guy, you know, he was writing another day about how he's going to go on this little radio show. Okay. It's called Guys Alone. Okay. That's it.

Guys alone. Where is this guy? And it's with Rain, Rain, and his buddy, Naty G. As they like to call him. Lady Gia. How on this body you're right now? And, you know, they just kind of, they kind of just, you know, asking him some questions. They kind of asking him some questions, right, about his life.

And see, the thing is, Joseph, he's got his own little pet project. All right. He's working on this character named Josiah. All right. And Josiah. Josiah goes to, he goes to, you know, Mountain Academy. And, you know, he's also, you know, he's involved in theater he does some shows things like that you know might be involved uh in the

english major as well likes to write stories you know stuff like that so okay you know how i told you there's a big twist to this joke okay joseph all right get ready his name has all four letters of my name okay j o s and h right all right so you might not get this on a first read of the joke like once i publish this thing and you know start getting it out but He's actually supposed to be me. Oh. He's like an allegory. Very deeply veiled allegory for me.

Yeah. So, you know, letting you in a little secret, letting your viewers in on a little secret too before this masterpiece gets out there. But essentially in principle, it's just a joke that you say the things that are going on, but you could just give synonyms for what's happening. And these people love that,

Olivia and Violet. So thank you for the question. I think Mara also told me she was asked about that. So it comes back up. It's just infinitely recycling down the list. It's like a chain. And then Josiah, now Josiah is writing about a guy. His name is Josephus.

Josephus, yeah. Jacoicus. Josephus, he's also working on a little pet project. He's right. That he's got on the backburn. It's on the backburn. It'll come out at some point. He's got a lot going on right now.

He comes back. That's his safe place. Yeah, he's a busy guy. He goes there when he needs a retreat. Yeah. And he's writing about fake doors. Real fake doors Real fake doors

Please tell me you go I just don't understand What you just said at all You've been laughing at the real fake doors thing From Rick and Morty For the last Oh Rick and Morty They had us come down

And do a bunch of promos Here at the radio At WRFH Radio Free Hillsdale 101.1.1.7 FM The thing that you're on right now I guess I'm on right now Sleep rage at GERP

Technically we're on the podcast network We are on the podcast network Of said radio station But they had us do some promos and we rift like commercials basically for an hour and it was only like

60 seconds of usable material Emily Shuddy almost skinned us a lot She was so mad at us But we had a good time Us and Lewis Us and Lewis then Shout out

Next question Next meme Jaden Jelso Will you take an English class with me Oh yeah I was actually talking to Jaden about this the other day I love Jaden

You all know Jaden right Yeah of a great guy Critically acclaimed author Is he English? I know he's an author, but I mean, I didn't know if he was, like, also an English. He's published a book. I'm well aware. He's got his little pet project.

Yeah, he's got it on Backburn. On the Backburn. Well, actually, it's more on, like, the front burner. It's actually the whole burner. Maybe the sequel is on the back burner. The whole burner running the book. Tire, murder. No, I love this guy.

I love this guy. I would totally take a class with you, Jaden. Just call me, dude. You got my number. We'll talk. We'll organize something. Yeah, we're not. You don't have to drop the number on the podcast.

Oh, okay. Okay. No, no, no need, no need, no, no. Full legal name, phone number. Jay Gelsa, 7-58. Social Security number. 7-582. Nope.

Do y'all even have y'all as memorized? Do you all even know? My own social security number? My own social security number? My own number, yes, social security number. My social number is nine. I got one of the, I got the ninth one. Old.

Oh, okay. Old like dirt. That's awesome. As Victor told me, Victor looked to me in the eyes and with such conviction yet, like two days ago, said, dude, you're 26. under what context what does that mean almost no context I was looking at the house I was like what

for the first time in my life as when we went to a Catholic school very structured very great like each grade kind of only talks their own grade when I got here it's the first time of my life I have friends who are like older than me or younger than me by more than a year and so you know getting to know this 26 year old who's been 26 years old really fun and Interesting.

Yeah. Because it's like, wait, not, I have to think, like, wait, not everyone who I talk to is the same exact age. Yeah. And I have, and now I have freshmen. I'm a junior and it's like, these are just infants. These are just minuscule beings that are just easily crushable, except I'm very small. Right. And the way you looked up to Storm, they're looking up to you.

I didn't look up to Storm is my class. No, no, no. You physically tilt your head upwards to see me. Very few of them tilt upwards to me. I think maybe one is shorter than me. I'm not that they're all taller than me, which is not. uncommon. How are you a freshman, Josh? You still are in Gallo? Yeah, I am. I am in Galloway. That's so goaded. No, it's really fun. Yeah, I love it. I'm liking a lot more this year. I appreciate

it a lot more this year. But my freshmen are great. Like, oh my gosh. I don't know. Do you know any Galloway freshmen? Maybe if you, like, uh, is isish. Ish. I know that guy. I think we know a couple others randomly. I'm not sure. I don't know. I feel like I do not know as many as I did last year, which is interesting. No, I don't know as many freshmen in general as I did last year. But we're unks now, dude. I don't know if this happened to you, and we've talked about it a little bit storm. People will just know who I am. Yeah.

Like friends, I get this too. Like, we'll run into, and like, oh, sorry, Nate. Who are you? Who? Yeah. Hello? Dude, that happens to me, too. Like, sometimes it's like, you know, you know, there's a difference between when you know you've met the person and you're just like, oh, I forgot their name.

But there's something entirely different when you're like, I thought it was a one-off thing. I've never met this man before. Apparently, I've met Prospeys that listen to this show. I thought it was a one off thing but happened to me three times It's never happened to me My name's not new you can I was like Oh Storm and I was like

Yeah you're from that like random podcast on campus I was like what random Sorry you mean the number one for the premiere The main event He Hillsdale podcast Except for a collegian we can review The Larry on podcast Most the other podcasts we host on the stuff

But I mean we're like the best We're pretty much almost the best Yeah close Close this well this podcast We had gate guy on This podcast is really only A little pet project on the back burner. On the back burner. I mean, we're not. But you're moving up. You're going to get to the front burner soon. We're getting good guests on here like Josh. You know, the schmuckos that we had on last week, dude.

Oh, God. Who did we have on last week? I just said that fully not remembering. Last week was, oh my God, was that, no, Owen was two weeks ago. No, it was Owen. It was Owen. Or was Dr. Peter. Either way we were in. That episode. That guy, found. Oh, no, it was Dom. It was Dom. It was Dom, Toronto. No, we love Dom. Actually, I do love Dom so much. That schmuck. Please listen to all of other episodes also, not just jobs. We are funny and we were funny last year. Yes. We've gotten, we've fallen off a little, but, you know. Yeah, we're unks. Nah, it's not worth it anymore, though.

Can I ask you guys a question? Yeah. This is the first time. No, this is the first. What's y'all's impression of Galloway as Simpsonman? Because, like, I feel, I feel like there's some animosity. I'm just wondering if y'all, you know, what's your, yeah, just what's your general feeling? So, like, I think it's, we, you.

You know, we are kind of the boisterous, the loud ones. We really enjoy it when you guys prank us and then we can prank you and then kind of becomes like an exchange and a thing because in a weird sort of way, the pranking interaction between the dorms makes, I think, at least in the Simpson opinion, makes the relationship actually a lot stronger. Yeah. Like we like Needfeld so much because they will like, they'll kind of go blow for. blow with us like they'll kind of hit us back and we'll have like a relationship there and so

upper classmen kind of can talk to the other upper class and be like what's going on here make sure the freshman don't go too which is how i feel like it was our freshman year yeah we had a lot more parody there and i feel like we want you guys to like this year i think it hasn't been as much like that yeah yeah which is why it's i think there's a slightly current negative connotation there i love you guys i think you guys are hilarious but i just wish you would like poke us back okay yeah that's helpful that's helpful as an r a that's good to know it's good to know because i don't I have no ill feelings about you guys. I love you guys.

You know, the pranks are not because we're like, go kill gal. It's like, let's go and like wrestle some guys. Like, let's go wrestle or let's go like just be a little annoying. A big thing in Simpson is like the boy man mindset of like, these are the last four years that we're still going to get to be like boys in a way. Right. Also turning into men and learning what that means in flux with itself.

And so like going out and wrestling you guys or like pranking you guys or pranking each other. Yeah, that's a big one. is something that's like important to like hang on to in this last like people come here and they're like oh I'm in Hillsdale and I'm a whole adult now I don't live with my parents anymore and I think there's a transist a transistor a transistor a transistor there's a transitionary phase that people will miss out on if they don't participate in stuff like that right right and if you do the cold changeover of just like kid to adult then you're going to lose the yep kid that you want to have forever and you're not and you're also not able to do like you're not

you're not going to be able to just snap your fingers and wake up you don't wake up up and you're a man, at least in my opinion. Maybe this is erroneous. No, you're right. But like, you don't wake up and you're a man. You, you day by day, week by week, month by month, learn what it means to be a man by being a boy still, but picking up little things along the way of manhood. And, you know, because we're old now like dirt, we're more men than boy. But these freshmen that we have, that you have that we have, they're boys. Like, they've been here for what? Three months? Three months? You know, that's not long. Some of them are still probably 17.

I mean, like, we've got to get them to kind of go at each other or a little, like, make those relationships, learn those lessons, have those random moments. And some of these guys are in a safe way, too. Of course, that's what we're here for, is for the safe way. And some of these guys come from backgrounds where they've never, ever had physical activity

in their life. Or like a sibling. Or a sibling to rough house with, like, you need dudes to, like, mess around with. Yeah. Like, yeah. Well, they have all sisters. Girls, girls, boo.

Yeah, girls, but we don't like girls. They're gross. Yeah. But, bu, bo, bo, bo, boo. But yeah, so I hope we see a little more of that. Okay. I was just thinking about it in the terms of Beowulf. You know, I hate to bring it back to that, but just, you know, the blood feud.

The blood feud, bro. No, there's no blood feud. Okay. That's ridiculous. That's what I wanted to clear out. And, like, it brings us in Simpson together to rally behind, let's go prank you guys. And I want to see that for you as well. Yes. To bring your galilee together.

I'm getting it. Yeah. Let me do it. Because, I mean, I assure you, we have that community. It's just a little more like. It's a little more niche. Yeah, it's a little more niche. And that's a sadesical.

That's a respect The worst I don't know about that I'm kidding I mean no It's And that is a very respectful Like form of community as well

But I think that Because it's Their freshman year For these freshmen Most it's not for us Like obviously We're past that now Well let me speak for my dorm

We love you guys Oh we love you guys Yeah we love you guys too You know you're our Hillsdale brothers I mean you know Sendish over to attack us Have you guys heard the Dr. Jennings speech

when they swear in, it's not the right word, the Marines. You should go this year. It's the morning of graduation. You should go. Every year he gives this speech

and it's fantastic and it's how Hillsdale men during the Civil War came together and said we need to fight, we need to rally behind our country. And it's a beautiful talk

about how, and the quote, I always remember is they put down their books and they picked up their rifles and they went to war. These men, same age as us. And I think that in the smallest way, obviously, we are still brothers in that way where we pick up our book or put down our books and pick up our rifles of spiritual warfare. Because really we're all the same people here. Like, you know, we like to be like, no, you're a Galilee or whatever. I'm Lutheran, whatever. Who cares? Doesn't matter. We are all essentially the same kind of people. And so we need to be.

to be able to work together and kind of sharpen each other. And that's, I think, one of the biggest things that a little bit of headbutting between the dorms does. Well said. That's why we want you guys. Please prank us.

Not tonight, because I'm really tired. But some other time. I'm here on tonight. I'm here on tonight, man. All right. I'm going to deploy-ish, dude. Deploying. You just send him, bro.

He's sending him. He's an army on his own. That guy, he'll take out a couple people himself. I love that kid. What a good kid. Oh, man. Ava Ask a couple questions.

Okay. How does it feel to be literally so cool? Wow. You're pretty cool. I like the sweater you got on, the goatee. The goatee's working.

It's working and it still works. Yeah, I was just doing, you know, the classic junior guy thing, the obligatory thing where you got to, like, try out the facial hair. Oh, yeah.

And I've capped it. So, and I think it's okay. I'm getting mostly... You're getting close to Tony Stark. Maybe round out right here. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Thought about selling weapons to people? Selling weapons?

No. You thought about that? No, dude, Tony Box. Getting into the military industrial. If one thing I dislike, it's the military industrial complex, yeah. Go off, twin. Josh Stark, I just think it's... Philb us in a scrap.

Am I allowed to talk about this? Can I talk about this? Wait, on what? Facial hair? No, no, the military industrial complex. Oh, yeah, rip it. You know, and it's intersection with facial hair. Of course, of course.

Intersection by individual hair. Unbelievable name for a podcast. Please, no, rip it. Yeah, I was just, I was just, you know, something simple to say. I don't have a lot, because I don't want to, you know, ran about it or whatever, but it's just a little silly to me sometimes when we think about, like, companies that are worth billions of dollars, and, like, literally their only

source of income often is, you know, like, selling weapons. Like, that's a little... Yeah, the privatization of war is a little strange. War is not what it used to be. It's true. It's true. Tony Stark did say that he successfully privatized World Peace in Iron Man, too. That might be me soon.

In Superman 4, The Quest for Mom 2. Tony Stark said that. In Superman 4. Ava also asked, and I know the context behind this, but I don't think very many other people will. Okay. What was your reaction when you first noticed your face had appeared on a Sequin pillow?

Now, I know what this is talking about. Your face is on a pillow with Sequin. But I don't think that many other people do. You say Sequin? Is it not? It's Sequin. It's sequin? Sequin.

I took a shot in the dark. I can't read. So you counts as a vowel and EQU, so it's a hard E phonetically. Oh, there we go. I would blow raspberry at you, but I don't want to do that to the sound equipment. Dude, someone remembers second grade. That's good. Phonetics, bro.

That was the only thing I paid attention to you. That's two years of my life. Second grade, that's two years of my life. So please explain this. Oh, yeah. So a friend of mine, Maris Seeley, she, I don't know. I don't know why she did this. I'm not complaining, but she ordered a

Sequin pillow of me So it's got my face And the reverse side of the sequins is blue, I believe And she unveiled it at a theater event In public in front of everybody And actually Aiden Christian Believe it or not, he had it under his shirt Friend of the show

And what? Friend of the show? Alumnistian. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. Let the man tell the story of the show. My fault, my fault. No, no, you're good. Yeah, yeah, no, it's true.

It's true. So she unveiled it. She unveiled it. But the way she did it was via Aiden Christian's womb. So he had it under his shirt. At a random moment during the event, he was like, oh, no, I'm giving birth. It's coming. And then out pops my face on a pillow.

And I really had no clue what to say, because what do you even say to that? Thank you. But it exists now. And Ava's interested in it. And hopefully that was helpful, Ava, just to give you my reaction. but I was dumbfounded but also like flattered oddly

but I'm not sure what to feel I'm still not set in my feelings on that I just can't get over just every single aspect

of that that story is just so awesome we have another question that and I wish I don't proofread your questions guys I'm sorry I don't look at them

before I like this is good news the message that says who asked the question so these this question is a little bit related to a previous question about being

the king of Texas or the jester of Texas this is would you rather be the president of Texas or the president of Hillsdale so would you oust Larry or oust Greg? And this is from Aaron dude no way I'm ousting Dr. Ron okay and I'm not just saying that because

we're on a he you know how many more years does he have? Whoa infinite bro no no as president you think it might be like a infinity years Charlie and the chocolate factory kind of thing where like he might hand it down to me he's going to take you up in a glass elevator into space. He's going to kill four other children.

He's going to murder other children. Josh, look down across my kingdom. Yeah, everything. My whole empire of dirt. Everything that I am. That's my favorite single artist ever. Like, I love Johnny Cash. He was married, I think.

He was what? Baddum-ch, come on, guys. That was my favorite single artist of all time. Oh, that's good. That's good. Yeah, several times. It's a little messy. But dumb.

Several. yeah i feel like i would rather be president of texas i think president of texas also implies that we'd be independent at that point there is a presidential position yeah now this is a question from a strange source but he really wants me to ask his questions these days so i'm going to grant blatner grant blattner grant blattner this is their this is their younger brother they're young blatner he's not even here no he's a huge fan of the show okay he his older brother was on the show right he says would you have an unlimited stash of white monsters or have unlimited sleep, which sounds like death.

Which sounds like death. I don't know. This is blowing my mind. Hold on. Can you guys interpret the unlimited sleep thing? Because that, to me, again, sounds like you're dead. Like, no, no, no, brother. Think about this way. This way.

Would you rather have unlimited, never ending sleep, sleep without end? But no games. But no games. But no games. Have you heard that? Yes, yeah. Or endless bacon.

Unlimited bacon. Unlimited bacon. but no bacon, but no bacon, excuse me. There's so many very... Oral tradition. I... Oral tradition. That's gold. This is like how degeneration of Homer happened.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's how the Odyssey was crafted. Someone said... Would you rather have unlimited Odyssey, but no Odyssey. But no CLAO. Go home and no CLAWs. We're fight and die, but still no playoffs. That's good

But no So would you rather have Like I think unlimited sleep Means like whenever you go to sleep It like fully charges you up Or unlimited white monster White Monster is a garthin in character Yeah

Are you familiar with a Garthas Yeah Jackson Casey and I have discussed this White Monster is a Garthon It's also ambrosial It's correct Yeah It's the ambrosia of Agartha

Oh yes Have you all been there A Gartha Dude I'm Italian Just check out Oh Storm might make it I might get there

Yeah Get out Okay hold on If I could go to sleep right now And And I'd die And never wake up I'd probably do it

That's horrific You only know that you Sleep is every day that I wake up I look forward Most to going to sleep at night That's a problem That's really sad That's really sad

Do we need to have you talk to Brock No I just think I get such joy When I lie down at the end of the day I'm like Back to bed Bed is the place That we live our lives

dreaming to return to. Okay, hold on, hold on. Watch this. I'm, hold on. I'm gonna hit you right back. Okay, okay. Do you yearn for the sleeping or for the peace of knowing that the day is concluded? I think you yearn for the peace of knowing that the day is concluded. But I go through my whole day in peace. No, you don't. You have to deal with me, at least usually in Elmer. But you don't, you don't stress me out. That's not true. I stress everybody out. You don't stress me out. Okay. I'm stress free since Oh, 3. And Josh here. He's just cooling, bro.

He's just chill. Josh, I don't care. With his oral traditions. Yeah. I have a cigarette and a monster. All right, we're on the way. So, like, is the infinite monster, like, monster cans?

Or is it just like, I can... Let's reframe it. Can I, like, conjure it out of my fingers or something? You have unlimited monster, so you can sell it or whatever. You can do whatever you want with that. You can also put people to sleep instantly. You're the sandman. Unlimited sleep power.

I'm still taking the monster. I'm taking the monster. I'm taking it. I'm taking the sleep. Oh. actually I think that you would

end up crashing the energy drink market with unlimited monsters way before you crashed the sleep

market no way before it's always going to be demand for sleep quite literally but I'm saying you're in

demand you don't become like a superhero or super villain you just be like I can literally no matter

what make you go to sleep wow and so you just sell that yeah pay 100 a thousand

you can really least. You know how much people pay for insomnia medication? Like, you're like... A lot. Yeah, I assume at least some. More than one. They pay more than one. More than one. More than one. But also less than one. Units. You could have a...

You could have a catchphrase, Josh. I'd be like, I'm going to send you down under. And then they go to sleep. Under, yeah. Nope. Junder. Let's stay with Junders. I'm going to send you down Junder. Caught myself. Good, good, good. There's some of all traditions that should not be practiced.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. We have one final question. Oh. And it has, as always, from Wyatt. Wyatt has a great question. You always have to set this up. Have you listened to the show? If no, I will be sad, but I will be like, okay.

I listened to the Dr. Peters episode, most of it, and all of the Nick episode, because I love Nick. Fantastic. So then you know that Wyatt's thing is he always asks an absolutely absurd but hilarious, would you rather question? And here it is. Okay. Would you rather kick a toddler in front of it all. audience and be seen by thousands or get punched by prime mike tyson so which bullet are you are you basically eating a literal bullet to the face or a real social bullet by kicking a toddler in front of

thousands am i just randomly selected how how i'm going to phrase this is you can't be like guys i had to kick like there's no no you have to like smile and giggle as you whoop this like is the toddler annoying is the toddler hitler so close no That's just the, you know, the vibe. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Would you go back in time? Because I feel like there's no way you answer yes to killing the toddler. You'll kill.

Not killing. Where does Tyson punch me? Your face. Pere headshot. That could destroy the moneymaker long term. That could kill you. That's the moneymaker too. It is the money maker.

Yeah, your face. Especially for you, dude. Yeah, handsome devil over here. An actor, handsome. Yeah, you're a... Think about that pet project that you got on the back to. It's on the back burner. on a 37% chance of

death. Irreversive death. 2% chance of death, 37% chance of unalterable facial damage. And the other one you're completely fine. I'm probably getting punched. I'm probably getting punched. I think I'm doing that. For the toddler. I know that might be a lame answer. I don't know, man.

I might kick the toddler. Think about it this way. How hard do you have to kick the toddler? You got to kick him. Does he have a 37% chance of death? Or is he like, is he good? Well, he has a 37% chance of crying. Of crying. No, no. The toddler as an 84% chance of crying, but a 3% chance of death. Okay.

Okay. No way me kicking a toddler. No way me kicking a toddler has a higher chance of death of me getting punched by Mike Tyson. I'm very frail. Can I reason with Mike Tyson? That's your first mistake. Can I reason with Mike Tyson was his last words?

Can I reason with Mike? I'll kick the toddler. I think it's also funny. It is the coward's way out, but I think that I'm doing it for the laughs. I think I could do it in a way that would get the 1,000-person audience to chuckle. Oh, no, no, no, no.

That has, because you have to stipulate that. I can, like, wind up. Is that they're, like, pure, ultra-left liberal, like, oh, my gosh. They're breathless. Why is Wyatt asking these sorts of questions? Is he just, like, outsourcing his, like, dark thoughts to you guys?

No, because they're not always dark. Like, I'll give you one that's just, like, I'm still thinking about the one where you spontaneously go to the bathroom when you come within 50 feet of a cheese steak, cassidia from two weeks ago. Or read 0.9% slower. Yeah. Or a 0.9 times slower. Dude, this is getting me thinking. That's what I'm saying. That's what we do here on the world zone. Nine times slower? Or does it mean at 0.9 times speed? You read 10% slower. 10% slow. But as in the most roundabout way possible. Here's thing, they're not always like bad.

Like the last one was, would you rather be able to resurrect fish or be able to dry yourself without a towel instantly after you shower. These are good questions. That's not bad, and it's also the towel. It's also the towel. You don't want to resurrect a fish. Why? Although, yeah.

Why? These are the kind of questions we need to be asking at this college. You know, like, what is a human? You know, what are the liberal arts? Why? Fish resurrection. And fish resurrection. Kicking toddlers.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Fish resurrection and kicking toddlers. That's actually the name is storming on his new band that you should check out this Saturday. No. Disclaimer, boys only is not endorsed kicking of toddlers or any other violent acts. We're getting punched in the face by my text. Please do not hit the person. Yeah.

Or the thing. Don't hit anything. Hands to yourself. Please keep your hands and feet inside the ride at all times. Well, speaking of rides, this has been a wild one. Yeah, we're about to crash. We're about to crash. We're about to go down in flames.

Thanks, Josh, for coming on the show. You have any final words? You're looking inquisitively in your jacket pockets right now. I am. He's receiving a phone. I just wanted to show you guys. Oh, my gosh, he had it the entire time. Is that the bobblehead of you?

That is the bobblehead of you? That respectfully looks nothing like you. Okay, I'm sorry. That was me when I had long hair and a bowl cut. Wait, this is incredible. It says Junder the Great on it. It's the nose. Okay.

So thank you to my mom. Shout out to my mom. No, I mean, it's awesome that your mother made. Can I have it? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Every time I make a public appearance, I do have to, you know, shout out mom. Shout out mom. Shout out.

Shout out. Shut out. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Isn't that good? That is fantastic. Do you guys want one? Oh, no. I have a bobblehead of Ronald Reagan.

My head's already pretty big. Yep. Yeah. My ego. Is that too much? Is that like, no, no, no. Is that too much? I'm just curious.

I think that it's actually less self-indulgent than you probably think it is. Okay. I think it's actually iconic. Because I didn't think of it. No, that's slaying. That's flourish right there. That's flourish. I'm flourishing.

We have little idols of yourself, you know. Literally golden calf in my own room. Yeah, I don't worship this thing, just by the way. Great clarifications. I do not quite literally worship myself. Self-bobblehead worship. You could not be more narcissistic if you tried. Actually, but we're literally.

worshiping yourself. Anyway, Josh, do you have any final words ever? Ever? Is this like it for me? Am I like done after this? Like I'm getting removed? Horse out back. Have you ever seen one of our guests out in the wild after their appearance in the show? No, they're gone. Besides like Nick? Well, Nick managed to serve. He struck a deal.

Is he still on the run or is he like? No, he's that he did a deal with us. Safe. Okay. What do you give you? What do I have to give you? I'm, shh. Silence. By your silence. No, thank you for having me on. This is awesome. I feel like. Like, I don't know, I've been thinking about this forever, and then just out of the blue, I get the invitation. Yeah. That's usually how weird people are like, that'd be fun to be on. And then I usually'm like, hey, you want to be on my show?

And they're like, ugh. That's all anymore, actually. I'm kidding. Thank you so much for coming. Yeah, of course. Thanks for having. And thank you all for the questions. These were like nine awesome questions.

I didn't have to disregard a single one, except the one from Liam, which I never asked anyone. Thanks, because I don't like Liam. I love you, Liam. He's asking more questions, but that's better ones. I've been Storm Drexler. I've been Ed Gallagher. He's been Joshua Robert Underwood. And this has been Boys Only.

Yippee.