WRFH/Radio Free Hillsdale 101.7 FM - Thursday Lunch: The World is our Stage

Episode Date: October 21, 2024

This Thursday, Jillian and Bella invite you to join them for Thursday Lunch. This week the topic of performance is on the table, and they hope you’ll enjoy tales ranging from tyrannical theatre to Irish folk music. Oh and never let Jillian take your gummy bears “so we can all share."

You're listening to Radio Free Hillsone 1.1.7 FM. I'm Bella. And I'm Gillian. And you're listening to Thursday lunch where we only have one question. Do you want to stay with us? And we're British. And we're actually in primary school. Do you want to sit with us?

Would you like to sit with me? Would you like to... I've got to get lunch from the canteen. Isn't canteen like a bathroom? No, they say that for real. Like where they buy food. You would know, guys, one thing you don't know about Bella is she's a British expert. Today's stories are, the word that we gave ourselves was performance, which I think can mean a lot of things.

I mean, Bella, feel free to disagree, but I kind of feel like it can be anything in all of life when you are just performing for the people around you. That's all I am, a monkey in the circus. So my story, I'm going to start. Yeah, you start. My first story is I did musicals all growing up. So I had a little bit of an advantage over Bella for curating stories here because all I did growing up was perform. And one of my prime performances was at my elementary school. I was in fifth grade and we had a fifth grade send-off party, a big awesome party where all the fifth graders would gather in the gym and watch each other do talent.

And I had been in the musical and two musicals, fourth and fifth grade musicals with these two girls and we all could sing. So me and these three carefully curated girls, we met. We had rehearsals in my friend's basement. And we decided that we were going to sing royals by Lord. So if you know any of those words, you know that we were in fifth grade and that we shouldn't have been singing that. But we went through the audition process and they said, yeah, we literally sang, gold teeth, gray goose, sip in in the bathroom. Bloodstains, ball gowns, trashing the hotel room. We don't care.

Like, are you kidding me? I guess, I mean that. Like, did they not know? I don't know if any of us knew. Maybe it doesn't matter to me. We made it through. And so after we'd already made it through the audition process, a girl effectively asked to join. And both the other two girls were like, Jillian, can she join?

And I was like, what? Are you guys insane? No. Obviously she can't join. We're done. And so what happened as a default, this is a side tangent of this story. What happened as a default was she decided to hand out birthday invitations to every single person in the classic set for her. She went around and like deliberately put all the envelopes on people's desks.

And the teacher asked and was like, oh, why doesn't Jillian get an invitation? And she was like, oh, I'm bringing it to her house. We were like low-key neighbors. And so I'm thinking, oh, she's just going to like deliver it to my mailbox. Awesome. Eventually I found out that she just wasn't inviting me because I didn't let her be in our special group to sing Royalist by Lord, which was really formative for me as a child. and it helped me understand that not everyone's going to like you when you do the right thing.

Wow. And when you stand up for yourself and your friends, everybody sees that. Wait, was she not allowed in it because she didn't sing good? She was a terrible singer, yes. Well, okay, so there's the reason. Well, another reason is that the group had already been made. And you had already been practicing and putting the hours in and practicing. For many, many moons.

Anyway, so we went up and we sang Royals by Lord and our costumes were, I remember this, sparkly leggings, some sort of shirt I can't remember, and black fedoras. We were black fedoras. And our starting pose for the song was all of us sitting on the ground, one girl like knees in front of her sitting like that. And then us with like two girls on the side with each having their one knee out like this. Because that was like cool girl pose. And I know for a fact we tried to do harmonies. We couldn't do harmonies. Oh, I've looked.

Not true. I haven't looked. I'm too afraid of seeing it. But maybe after this I'll go look for a video because if it could never be. Royas. Royals. You know that we fought over like, who gets the main solo? And I think we all just ended up singing the whole.

song together because we couldn't figure out who got solos because we were like 11. But yeah, no, everybody watched that. I was pretty well liked in elementary school. So kind of, it kind of. Wait, so did you win? Or was it just like a showcase? There was no real winner. It was like showcase.

And I remember being like, man, all these boys are going to have crazy crushes on me. Gold teeth gray, go slipping in the bathroom. I'm like, I do drugs and you guys already know that. I am cool. I'm cool. And I'm wearing. in a black fedora right now. And I will hit you with a hat trick.

Hat trick. We did quite a bit of hatography. I know I want to talk about this. Like I'm actually horribly embarrassed talking about this. I'm very embarrassed at mine and I think like I don't remember. Is it worse than mine? Yeah, it's worse. Because there was no redeeming quality.

Are you done with yours? Oh. No, I'm just making sure I'm not interrupting you. Are you done? I want to go now. No, I'm just, I was like I could start now, but you should keep going. as though it's my turn. That's not what I...

Guys, for those of you who didn't just hear what Bella just said, this is Radio Free Hillsdale 101.1.1.7 FM. I'm Jillian. And I'm Bella. And you're listening to Thursday lunch. Go ahead, hit your story. Well, I didn't actually mean to end yours. I was just like it was a good segue.

No, I was done. Oh, actually? I was fully done. Oh, okay. What else did you want me to say? I don't know if there was more. I'm looking for a video right now, though. Okay, basically mine.

It's short and sweet. I guess it's not that short. But the funny... Okay, there's kind of a, whatever. Wow, you said a lot of words that didn't say anything. Yeah, I know. So they announced there's going to be a bit of a talent show. Wow, that's awesome.

And I can't remember exactly how this idea came about, but me or my friend and I, we were like, okay, we're going to have a bit of a comedy skit. This was fourth grade. Now, did he think you were funny? It was not funny at all. I'm going to tell you right now. I just think boys in elementary school did not think girls were fine. I honestly don't even know how I got roped into like we were casually like, I feel like at

that age, a girl and a boy are not casually hanging out. It's like he's a crush or something. Like, you know what I mean? But this was different. It was different. I don't know. We just were like, guys, comedy like surpasses this. Like, you know, I don't know. But I, okay, how do I explain this? I think at the heart of this idea was a ploy to eat ice cream sandwiches. And by this, I mean, I wasn't allowed to eat anything like that. Wait, oh my gosh. And I think, like, I was thinking back on it because I was trying to think of a story. I was like, oh, this makes me sick to my stomach when I think of it.

But we really thought, oh, this is so bad. We would go to my house and practice, eating the, basically the comedy scene was going to be, we sit on the stage and we eat the ice cream sandwich and then we'd be like, wait, is this supposed to be a comedy skin? And that was it. That's not real. there might have been a tiny bit more. I honestly need to ask my mom.

You really can't tell you the truth. But that was literally basically it. And thinking back, I remember practicing at my house and being like, no, I know, I know. I know. And being like, mom, like, we have to have another one. Like, you know, like to practice again. And I literally, looking back was like, this is awesome. Like, I just get to eat ice cream sandwiches.

And I, it was like, my mom was like, she was, I mean, she was giving me the ice cream sandwiches. I remember that that was the most awesome part. You played her. And genuinely. I think that I didn't care how embarrassed I would be. I didn't think I'd be embarrassed. I guess I did kind of think it would be funny, but I only cared.

Like, this is awesome. I get to you to eat ice cream sandwiches. I'm not even joking. Wait to you, too. I'm not understanding. You guys just sat on the stage. Oh, just wait. We're practicing right now, okay?

Okay, I'm ready. We're in my condo and we're like, okay, we're going to sit like this. There must have been one or two other things we said, but it was literally 45 seconds, like the whole skit. And it was like us being like, this is really good. good. Wait, is this supposed to be a comedy skit? Like, I'm not kidding. I like can't even force a laugh for that. Oh, just, oh, just wait, just wait. So we're getting up on, we're like the next act up, like the week later, something, because we had to practice for a long time. And I remember,

this is one of the things I do remember is having a thought, like, wait a second, wait a second. You remember having a thought about it? About being like, I don't think this is going to be good. Yeah. But I had not thought of that before. All I thought about was. I guess this is awesome. And so we go up there, we sit down, we're eating the ice cream during the show. Yes, we're eating the ice cream sandwiches. It's our act. And then we're like, wait, is this supposed to be a comedy skit? Not a single laugh. Oh, you laugh now, but literally I can't like thinking back. And it was like the auditory or like the gym filled with parents and students at my private Catholic school, not a single laugh. No, not a single person left.

and we just walked off the stage. They might have clapped. Like when they realized it was the end, and we were like, it's so, it's honestly so embarrassing. Like, I can't. You're somebody else's family story.

Like, I'm 100% sure some family. No, right. Goes, is this supposed to be a comedy sketch? Like, every week. Because of how, like, they looked at each other and were like, what just happened? I need to text my mom and ask her if she remembers it because, like, looking back, it's one of the worst things I've actually ever done.

And I was very, very embarrassed coming off the stage. It was like, it was like an awakening moment for me of being like, wait, like, it wasn't worth eating the ice cream sandwiches to be embarrassed. Like, I remember being like, I thought I was winning the whole time because I got to eat the ice cream sandwiches, but the, and I didn't think I'd be embarrassed or that I'd care about being embarrassed. But I remember getting off the stage and like the tensions were high in the comedy skit group because it wasn't funny. Was Sebastian okay? I don't remember at all. Again, like a lot of this, I literally think is blocked out because I my brain is like don't remember that don't remember that there's no way but

wait I'm sad for you I'm like terrible the sad thing is I'm not even laughing because it was horrible I want to laugh with you but it's just like it was it was literally my most unfunny moment in the whole world and I just thought it would be worth it and it wasn't well now we know I can't like your mom fell for your tricks I don't know she she must have known I if that was my kid I'd be like this is hilarious and I'd be in the audience, camcorder out, dying, laughing and dying and crying, because that's so embarrassing. Wait, yes, you'd be laughing at them, though. I don't think you're supposed to laugh at your kids.

I don't know what I would do. That has to be bad for their development to be like, ha ha, you're so dumb and funny. Yeah, they definitely didn't. And I hope I wouldn't actually do that. But I would record it and then like with my husband later in the night be like, can you believe that? But also, like, I'd be like, I did that once too. Like, I feel like that is so...

I hope your parents understand, like, how cool that made you in a weird way. Not actually real cool. Okay. Are you done now? Yeah, I'm done. Jeez. My turn. This is kind of a non-story.

Kind of more of a set the scene, get to know Jillian a little bit. Whoa. So back in the day, this was actually probably the exact same era as the Fedora and the talent show era, to be honest with you. And, um, so... my activity of choice growing up was we had like rules about TV in my house. Did you have TV rules in your house? Yeah, we did. They were like, you, you don't watch 30 minutes if you do two chores. Yeah, it was weird. If you didn't want to do a chore, you had to go outside and play. And so I'd go outside and play. And we had this deck in our backyard that was perfect for choreographing. So I would mobilize the girls in the

neighborhood, the little neighborhood girls who were three, four years younger than me. And force them into hours of rehearsal in the summertime. I would make them dance and sing songs I had written and that I was making up on the spot. Wait, how old were you? I was about, I was like nine to 10. And so I would make up songs on the spot and be like, sing it, go. And they'd be like, uh, and I don't remember. But Liberty was always like able to remember what I had told them. And I was able to remember what I told them. So I'd be like, no, it's not that. It's this. And me and Liberty still have a joke because the well, I'm going to sing it for you. Okay, okay.

The tune of the song was, oh, actually, I'm just going to sing you the whole first line so that you know what kind of songs we're dealing with here. I'm Molly Anderson, queen of the world, star of the school. Wait, it's like Deardom Diary. It's exactly like that. We ate that up. Queen of the school. Queen of the school. And we had this one tone deaf friend.

She was completely tone deaf. And so I... Weren't you forcing all these people? Yes. Yes. So she's Molly Anderson. and she, Wait, why is she Molly Anderson?

I only had a pool of like four to pull from. Everyone, all the other roles were taken. So she was Molly Anderson. Oh, she also, Liberty had to be Tiffany Lenson. Because she could do gymnastics. What does that effort? Tiffany Lenson. So the tune is, I'm Molly Anderson.

And every single time Sandra would go, I'm Molly Anderson, queen of the world, star the school. And if you ask Liberty. punch her in the face. And we would just be like, me and Liberty together would be like, no! No! You did it wrong.

You did it wrong again. You think the wrong tune. And she's just like a kid. But I'm like yelling at her like, I'm a real director getting paid big bucks to make this production. One time. Only one time. Every other thing I ever created, we just like did it in the backyard and pretty much my mom or dad would see it. And that was the end.

Once we had like a dance recital on the deck that my extended family was forced to watch, in which I did the Harlem shake with my. newly born sister and shook her around. And the fact that she didn't get shaken baby syndrome, I pray, I thank God every day for that. You Harlem shook a newborn? Well, she was like one year, one year old. And I Harlem shook her. And there's a video of it. Wait, is this sailor? Yes. And her cranium is like moving all over. It's genuinely really troubling. Exactly. Like a rag doll. But I wasn't meaning to be malicious. I was just like, it's time to Harlem shake. Anyway, Those are the only performances we had.

The performance that I think culminated it all was we stole like a curtain from down the street. We asked somebody to borrow their curtain and we strung it up against two trees and like this ladder. We had a ladder and a tree and we hung it from those two. And we sang a collection of songs for people who came to the show and they had to pay a dime to be an audience member. and then we had an intermission where Liberty can sing a song in a tutu called Snacks for Sale and the theme of the song

was creepy and my my strategy my strategy for making money was to creep people out so much that they were just like okay here's a dollar cheese stop singing not joking not joking she had obviously choreography where she was doing like pirouettes and like

pleas and stuff I also promised my brother in the course of this same performance that if he sat up in the tree and ran sound for us, I would give him gummy bears because we had gone to a birthday party the weekend before and there was a pinata and I like literally was the oldest one there. So I was just scooping gummy bears into this bucket. You're the only one who has like fine motor skills. I literally hauled out and then I made every, oh, this is so bad. I mean, everyone gave me their gummy bears and said, I'm going to put them in a bucket so we can all just take from them. and then I ate every single one of them.

I ate every single one. So not only had I promised everyone else that I would give them their gummy bears back and we could all just eat from them, I had promised my brother, Micah, that if he ran sound, I would give him gummy bears. But I couldn't fulfill either of those promises because I had eaten every single one of the gummy bears that I had been given. Okay, hit it.

Basically, because I went to a Catholic school, we adopted that we were all Irish people. So we, any showcase that we had, we sang traditional Irish music, I mean, obviously. And like Molly Malone, like, do you know? But anyways, so one day, I think I was probably, again, in fourth or fifth grade, my music teacher's like, guys, like, there's going to be, we're going to hold auditions for the solo for like the end of the year show or whatever for Molly Malone. Yeah.

And in a moment of bravery, I'm like, I'll do it. First? Well, no, here's a thing. I didn't raise my hand. We had to sign up. But, or I guess we didn't have to sign up because I went, anyways, I told my teacher, I'm like, I will stay after school and I will audition. And so I think like, I forget when it was at a weird time because I remember I saw my mom like before. Maybe it was like the next day. And somehow I learned like on the way like walking into the school, someone must have said something to me. I was the only one who signed up. That cannot be true.

The only one. And I remember, like, for some reason, like, I was in my gym clothes or something. It was after just going with my mom, I can't. Don't make me. How old were you? Don't make me. Like, I don't know, 11. Oh, so you were little.

You were little. Yeah, I was little. Yeah, 11 at the oldest. And I'm like, please, don't make me. Please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please. Begging my mom starting to cry. She's like, no, we're here. Like, you're auditioning. And plus, I had never, I don't know where that came from because I wasn't a singer.

I wasn't any of that. Oh my gosh. We get into this room. I'm like, dry tears. My mom's like, I'm waiting out here. And I'm like, okay. And we get in.

And it's just, and it's just Mrs. Dittis, my lovely music teacher. And she's like, okay, well, you're the only one. So I'm like, I know. And I never even sang in front of everyone. So she, so she like gives me this piece of music, I don't know, to sing, something I must have known. And the people who.

who are listening will be able to see this, but I was so, I like had to disassociate because I was so embarrassed and freaked out. So I sang the whole song like this. Looking into the corner. Looking like, like right in front of me is Mrs. Didis, like on the other end of the room. If she's north, you're looking southwest. Yes. I'm literally like looking in the corner of the room like, he died of a fever and no one. So, and I cried afterwards too. I was like, I can't believe he made me go to that to my mom. She was like, you wanted to and sometimes you just need to do stuff. Like, you know, I was like, I hate you, I hate you, hate you.

But so of course, let's see, who's in the running? It's me. So I went immediately. You got the solo? I got the solo. And I remember for a little bit being like, like I wasn't sure if anyone knew that I was the only one who auditioned. So I remember someone like, I remember like bragging a little bit, being like, I got the solo guys. Except I started to get angry.

because when we were setting up for the showcase, one of the teachers was like, who's doing the solo? I was like, raise my hand. And she's like, you come down here. Oh, why do I have to stand amidst the second graders? Because they're in the front. So I had to be in the front so I could have a microphone. And so immediately, I'm like, oh, my gosh. Are you serious?

Like, I'm not standing with the second. Like, I remember being very angry. Like, and I'm in fourth grade. And I'm like, guys, I have to go stand with the stupid second graders. I got the solo. So it's just part of the. Yeah. Part of the deal.

Yeah, I mean, you just got to do what you got to do for stardom, you know? I know, when you're a big star like me, you guys wouldn't get it. Sorry, I have to go stand with the second graders, but I was peeved. You actually sang the solo. Oh, I did. And I kind of just like... Was it beautiful? No, it wasn't.

I went like this. And it was exactly like this. So, we all, the whole school, well, the whole like first through sixth grade sings. And then there's this, it's Molly Malone. There's this one part. And I go, I ruined it. I go, she died of a fever and... Like, I start so low and then I jump right up.

She died of a fever and no one could save her. And everyone was like, wait, did ever say you did a great job? Yeah, people said that. But I remember immediately when I started singing, I was like, no. No, no, no. I didn't even think I had the worst voice. I just the way that I went, she died of a fever and no one could save her. and I got right of the face.

Like I'm 100% sure. And then I had to stand with the second graders for like the whole rest of the song. And it was terrible. Wow, that sounds horrible. So I guess both my performance stories are really not good. I was 100% a tyrant. And I think I've kind of outgrown it a little bit, but I have tyrant tendencies. No, I get that.

Okay. Well, you're supposed to say, no, you don't. No, I mean, like, I feel that. No, it's fine. I don't care. No, you know what's awesome. No, you really mean. To me all the time.

Okay. I don't want to talk about this anymore. Wait. What? Wait. I have to go. Me too. But thanks to everybody who sat down with us for our Thursday lunch today.

I hope you ate a delicious meal. I hope you laughed a little. I hope you grinned. I hope you had a fun time. Smiled from ear to ear. Yeah, on Radio Free Hillsdale, 1.1.7 FM. I'm Jillian. And I'm Bella.

I'm back you next week. Bye.