WRFH/Radio Free Hillsdale 101.7 FM - Truman and Claire Like People: Jillian Parks

Episode Date: April 23, 2024

This week on the podcast we have a musical guest with whom we discuss being on WHIP and falling in love, getting hit by a bus, and boys who pirouette. 

I'm Truman and I'm Claire and we like people today we like Jillian Parks who is studying in D.C. this semester. She was just named the next editor-in-chief of the Collegian and she loves to sing. Additionally, this is our first episode with sponsors. Puffs plus lotion to help me get over my cold and Big Bee coffee specifically their acid boba drink which is shockingly good. Everyone try the crystal Big Bee blast. It makes your mouth taste so... Everyone, wash your hands and don't get the coldest but going around campus. I might be coughing in this episode. I don't know. We'll see. Jillian, I randomly saw you over spring break at DC that one time.

How's DC been? How's WIP? Yeah, it was rather fortuitous seeing you, Truman. We actually, I drove by in a car and Truman walked by. It was an extremely strange moment. I was going to the Titanic exhibit with my father, who was coming to visit for spring break, and there was Truman from Hillsdale. Whip has been, what hasn't Whit been, I think is the real question that I need to be asking. I bet it hasn't been bad.

No, it's been awesome. I did a really funky little finesse thing where I said, I'm going to take one class only and three one credits. Because most people take two, three credits and a one credit. I said, I'll be full-time only and nothing more. So I'm taking continental lit and then I'm taking a one credit with Molly Hemingway. I'm taking an additional one credit with Molly Hemingway. And I'm taking the radio one credit all the way from D.C. So this means that my semester is far less stressful than the typical whip students.

I will throw that out into the ether so people know that. But I also really love the jobs that I'm doing. I do say jobs plural because I'm working for an outlet called Modern Age Journal. and I'm working for a theater review out there so that they can buy my tickets so I see shows because as Claire said, I love to sing. I love shows. I don't. This one's going to be Truman and Claire, colon, the musical. That's so awesome. I like that I bring the musical with me. Do you love Dr. Mian as much as I do?

Okay, you don't understand. You can't ask me that question on air because I love Dr. Mian and I would drop everything to marry him. I really hope he doesn't listen to this. Troutman and I have had the same conversation that we want to marry him and also marry his wife because she's also perfect. Don't tell me that. That's like the worst possible thing I could hear right now. I really love Dr. Mian. Okay, the only way I can describe him to people is that he's perfect. And he's the smartest, funniest man in the world.

He also, maybe I shouldn't, maybe this is creepy to point out, but he has the perfect little dimples. And when he grins, you're like, oh, cool, I'm going to melt into a puddle. I would like to go on record and say that I don't want to marry this man. Okay. That's only because you don't know him, Truman. Yeah, exactly. And that only makes one of us. And Claire's getting married to someone else.

I've never met a girl that went on whip that wasn't in love with Dr. Brown. Perfect. I'm glad I'm not the only one because it's literally all of us. It was instantaneous too. I was like, what flavor of Protestantism are you? I'm evangelical Protestant. Yeah. Sorry about that.

Are you a Calvinist like Elizabeth Trumpman? I'm pretty close to Calvinist. I'm on like the four point. I have some trouble with limited atonement, but other than that, I'm on there. You're a tuip. Yeah, I guess you could call me tuip. I don't know if that.

Is that important to people? I don't know what that means. You don't have to. You're Catholic and you don't like anyone. All right. This is Truman and Jillian explained Calvinism to Claire. The show no one wants.

Yeah, nobody wants to hear that. But it's funny because I hate Calvinism. You hate Calvinism? All of it? You hate all of it? Some of it is like just biblical. I admire Calvin

The I admire the spirit With which Calvinists defend their views And hold on to them Very It's like the worst part of Calvinists And very dogmatically And allow for no debate whatsoever

I'm not like that But like some of the other Some of the other stuff What's the other twoip It's total depravity Unconditional election We're not totally depressive We're not puppets.

That's not really what that means. I don't want to have this conversation on a podcast. Boo. I didn't, until I came to college, I didn't know that much about Calvinists. And I just assumed that no one liked Calvin Coulage this much. So it's been really interesting to see that everyone's so devoted to him.

Yeah, he's such a good prez. I love that we still get to have traces of him in our government. Yeah, if being a Calvinist means that you get to play with your stuff, Tiger and travel in time. Hey, Truman. I'm all for that.

That's a, that's a Calvinist. Hobbs reference honey and it went right over your dumb little head. I don't know stuff guys. This is hard for me. I'm trying to keep up. You just like Calvin Coolidge and I went, is that a president in my brain? Yes. Thank you. Not as great as our first president. Calvin and Franklin. Yeah, where my Franklin is sat. No way. Turn up. Our greatest president is Gerald Ford who literally invented the automobile. Guys, I'm just dealing this from three of your lettermen on Twitter.

Going back to the show. You just became editor-in-chief of the Collegian. Yeah. That's awesome sauce. I never did. And you know, I never did either. Truman also didn't get it when he applied. Yeah, I wrote one article for the Collegian.

So what would you say to all the losers out there who didn't get to be edited? I knew you were going to ask you something insane like this. Wait, losers as in my awesome fellow senior team next year or all people who have applied through all of time. Okay. Or who have never applied. Yeah. Or who has to be. What do I have to say to everyone who hasn't been editor in chief? Yeah. Okay. Um, I'm so sorry for you. And I hope you, I hope you dream big and accomplish great stuff because I already did. So do you think this makes you, better than everyone else? Oh, I actually think it probably makes me worse. Because I feel like it will make me one of those people that goes out into the world and it's like, wow, I'm it. And then I go out to the real world and I get hit by a bus, literally. That'd be crazy?

Because here's the thing. Bus drivers don't care if you're editor-in-chief. If you're in the middle of the road, they will run you over. This is me, but as Homecoming King, where bus drivers... Oh, my gosh, yes. Yes. Bus drivers also don't care if you're homecoming king or not. Unfortunately, Claire has never had an accomplishment like this in her life.

and we'll never get hit by a boss. Last night I was, I imbibed. Isaac Green was at the pennies last night. Shout out weef. And I went up to him and I was like, hey man, I know you admire me and everything, but you don't have to lose all the same stuff I lost last year. Oh, you're not on the student board, whatever.

You're not a student government or editor-in-chief. You suck. Did he cry? I do too. No. Did he grin from ear to ear? He grinned from ear to ear. He would.

Isaac Green grinned from ear to ear. Such a grinner. I love him. He's the sweet summer child. I keep having to edit out almost like every three podcasts I talk about Isaac Green and I keep having to cut it out. I think it's kind of important to keep in in this one though, right? Yeah.

You're listening to Truman and Clearleg people on Radio Free Hillsdale 101.7 FM. Speaking of our podcast, we were talking about this a little bit before the show. maybe you can incite some hope for fans of the show. Do you think that Truman and I should continue this little ditty post grad? That is the easiest, fattest yes of my life. Because we were actually, I was talking about someone, somebody. Are you calling me fat, Julian? Yes.

I was talking to somebody earlier about this show. And they were like, it's just so fun because a lot of the shows are like really, they're like liberal artsy. Like, I love this topic, so I'm going to talk about it. I'm going to teach you things. And that's awesome. Like, I'm glad we have that. But I also think it's awesome that we have a show where people just sit behind a mic and are like, meow, what are you do in school?

Like, it's really awesome. And so if you guys can find a way to continue it, I will listen for the rest of my days. And I think we can talk about this later, but I think you could market this in a way that people all over the land would listen to it. Because you guys are fun and you like people, but not everybody. And someone, people want to be. We change it to Truman and Clear hate people. Truman and Clear like one person. Truman and Claire interview Bo Jiden.

We're like, what's the worst grade you ever got at Hillsdale? Mo. I graduated top of my class, yeah. Unnecessary. Maybe there is hope for us, especially now that Truman and I might be moving to the same beautiful city. I really think it would be awesome, guys. The swamp. The swamp.

Beautiful city, the swamp. Truman and I are swamping. I hope to. Okay, we've gone 13 minutes just talking crap. Let's get out to the real issue. We're really good. Are you sad that I'm graduating and so you can't be my boss at the Collegian? Okay, here's the deal.

Half of that is yes, half of that is no. I am really sad that you're graduating and I wish you could be here all day, every day for the rest of my life wherever I go. Because the Collegian Office, sometimes it's the Clare and Gillian show. And that is, those are the best days for sure. I wouldn't want to be in charge of you, though. I would feel funky about that. I've made Elizabeth Troutman's life a living hell because... Well, I kind of like that.

I think it's kind of fun. Every time she says that I can't do something, like I had the word buttholery in my column. No, you didn't. Yeah, I did. And she was like, awesome. You cannot do this. And I was like, oh, so you hate me.

It's like we're not friends anymore. You have notorious beef with Danny Malter. a former guest on the show. What? Yeah. There are really two divisions in the show. You've got like Michael Bachman, the Ben Hinrichs. Instigators.

Yep. You know, the Danny Moulter side of things. And he got like the Marianne Powers, the Juliana Unseths. Am I in there? The Chris Dick. Underdogs. Yeah. Yeah, the Gillian Parks.

So does he say that we have beef? Is that what's happening? Well, he just told us about what happened last year. Danny and I are acquaintances. And that's the word that I would use in that we see. each other and we wave sometimes and he's dating my friend Madison. As far as you know. Well then did you forget.

What? I hope they are still. Did you forget about the time that he threw lasagna in your face? Yeah. Did you forget about that and you had third degree burns? Oh, we're bringing that up. Oh, yeah, you forgot. Oh, I'm seeing, I'm seeing now what we're talking about.

Yeah, no, that was a misunderstanding. Oh, really? Wait, is there no beef? No, it was just an accident. He tripped and fell. the lasagna was piping hot in true saga fashion piping hot delicious food um and it got all over me and i said daniel don't do that again and he said oh jillian our will never that will never happen our will never happen he did say that our will never happen again and then we shook hands and we haven't spoken

since no beef what is this vegetarian lasagna perfect joke. Yeah, it was. I give that an 8.9. If that story is true, my middle name is Cassandra. And if that story is false,

it would not be inaccurate to say that my middle name is J. Wait, I can't follow that. Nor would it be inaccurate to not say that my name is not mhm. It's a cool thing called

Lightotes Lighten's. We talked about that Dr. Mian's class. Yes, yes. It's a you talk through contradiction.

It's great. I'm going to edit the joke that's proven made out, but it was the funniest joke that's ever been made on the podcast and everyone should ask us

about it. Because they will tell you we just can't put it on air. Last night was the pennies. The spring version of the Lairies. For those of you

who don't know, it's the showings of the the Hillsdale Underground Independent Film Festival. And if you don't know, then you're not cool enough to be invited. That's true. It's very exclusive. It's rather exclusive.

It's pretty exclusive. I've been a director thrice. True. You were in my film last night. What was that experience like? Being in your film? Yeah. It was awesome.

I got to talk about something that really hurts women. And I got to talk about the changing definition of femininity in light of, you know, periods and makeup and the creature. Did you enjoy the event? Oh, I did. I love a good event. I love seeing my friends and watching movies. I also love being squished together in a small living room on uncomfortable folding chairs, wearing a dress I bought at the Salvation Army. So all my favorite things were included in that event. Did you enjoy watching me play Wordle? Actually, yeah, that was like rather impressive. You're quite good. And it wasn't Wordle. It was Quirtle. It was the quad of wordle. Okay, the real impressive thing

was my Minesweeper skills, but no one was watching. I'm sorry. I actually do think Minesweeper is impressive, so I would have appreciated it. I solved expert Minesweeper in 203 seconds. That's quite good. Just so everyone knows. No, that's like quite good. Are you? No, mind. We'll talk about this later. Tremant has an IQ of

230. Is that actually really are you being dead? Like, are you being serious? I made that up. I don't know my IQ is. I could be right. I think you might be. You could be off. He could be homecoming. It would not be inaccurate to make the statement that I, Liam Giles did not pronounce my name correctly when naming me Homecoming King. What did he say?

Truman Kios. But also. Liam Gills. Yeah, get him. Get them back. When I joined the Catholic Church, the deacon said Truman Kojos. So that's my real name. Joaquin, what did you think of my movie?

I thought it was great. I thought it was fun. I thought it was fun. creative. I'm taking the documentary class next semester and maybe I'm going to steal the exact same one and do it again. He asked everybody how they felt about McDonald's and honestly, that's what I want and, like, I actually do want to know that about my friends because I think it says a lot about a person how they feel about McDonald's. There's, you know, like the worst type of person in the world is like, I would never eat there. Do you know that their chicken nuggets aren't real chicken?

Do you know that they use grease and that it tastes really bad? I'm like, oh, so one of those things is true and one of those is not. Speaking of truth, you're listening to Truth Man and Claire like people on Radio Free Hillsdale 101.1.7 FM. Truth man and clarity coming at you. Speaking some facts. That is the second best joke. The best one we can keep in this episode. Yeah, exactly.

Second best, though. You'll never know. All right. Did we actually get to know Julian at all? I feel like we got to know Jillian through, you know, just talking smack. Yeah. Yeah. You get to know my personality.

You don't know my lore. Yeah. Yeah. It's deep. It's deep, deep. That's love to the listener's imagination. Or they can follow me on Instagram. It's all there.

We might learn more about your lore in these next two segments. Gillian, please perform 10 seconds of ASMR. Or a song. Oh, sad. That was my Fergie impression. That's going to be so terrible for me to edit. Thank you for doing that.

Julian, what's your favorite musical? It is a tie between Little Shop of Horrors and Newsies. They both make me cry. Two good ones. They're very good and they're very feel good. They're not like, I don't cry because they're, I don't cry because they're sad. I cry because it's like, wow, theater's really beautiful. Little Shop of Horrors, believe it or not, I know everybody gets eaten.

I get it. It's still very feel good. The music is so campy and so awesome. And then Newsies, obviously. Who doesn't feel good watching a bunch of boys pirouette? I feel very good watching boys pirouette. I don't want to say that again. But it is how I feel.

Rapid fire. Rapid fire. You're going to rapid my fire? Yep. Let's rapid you. Gillian, what is the worst final grade you've gotten in a class at Hillsdale? I got a B plus in great books. You suck.

Okay. Jillian. What's up? Who's your favorite couple? Oh. I actually forgot about this. It's Bella and Gavin. They're my friends.

I'm sorry, Claire. don't be mad at me, but it's Bella and Gavin, because I met them as a couple. I met them, and they were, they came in, they dated in high school, and then came to college as in tandem, and it's really awesome. So they have to be my favorite. Gillian, what two dorms would you make co-ed? Sorry, sorry. I'd probably go with Sone and Whitley.

That's my favorite answer we've gotten so far. Because, that's creative. I think those are the two groups that need. the most co-ed help. And I think most people would probably agree with me. Although maybe there's some sick sown residents out there that I just don't know. Breakoselli. Yeah, she's awesome, but she's not a son resident at her core.

At her core. Jillian, who's your favorite fundy? Okay, I would say all of the confident Mewalfas who walk around sing in and jamming and wearing their clothes. So you don't like the not confident ones? Yeah, no. If you're going to be a mulephousas, me offa, you better be confident about it.

Like, don't go in and be like, ah, like, that ruins the entire point. If you're going to be a mu alpha, be a mu alpha. And I appreciate the vibes that come with that. That makes sense. Thank you. I appreciate it. Beautiful answer. Oh, wow. Jillian. As a Calvinist, you know

about Jesus. Wait, I'm not a Calvinist. I just like, like, I do subscribe. As a two whip. Not even all the other points. Anyway, continue. As an evangelical little girl, you know about Jesus. I love that guy.

We don't. Us Catholics, we do not. What? Don't say stuff like that. We know drink wine and... Mary? Mary. That's the thing. Do people actually characterize you that way?

I don't know. I don't care. Yes. I don't... The timid yes from Truman is awesome. I'm not saying this is a true characterization. Yeah. Not endorsed.

I'm an Irish cradle Catholic, so I don't listen, nor do I care. No, and you just drink the drink, am I right? I don't listen to the haters. I do listen to the mass. That's what I meant. But, Jillian. Yeah, what's up? Jesus calls us to love everyone.

Yeah, yeah. Who do you love the least on Hillsdale's campus? We love everyone, even the haters and the losers at Hillsdale campus. Thank you for that. It's such a weird episode. It's so weird. I could think. Wait, my least favorite person on campus is...

Yeah. Claire on a scam. scale of one to negative 62. Wait. Negative 62 being the lowest? Yes. Okay.

How would you rate this episode? Jillian Parks is one of my dearest friends. Oh no, you already know it's going to be bad then. Has been on a whip and I have missed her. So it's nice to talk with her. It's always nice to sit next to you, Truman. so I would give this podcast a 0.7.

Oh my gosh, wow. I'm just going to give it a straight zero, straight nothing. This is awesome. I did way, this is way higher than I thought. I think it's going to be like negative 32. Julian, who do you think we should have on the show next? I actually think that Ali Hall would fare well on this show. I think, I don't know Truman, I don't know if you like her, but I know that Claire's kind of a fan.

I like Ali. Okay, I really think. an alley hall moment could be a solid moment for you guys if you were in dc my genuine like if you were to continue this post grader Hannah rowan is one of is my supervisor on whip and she's truly one of the coolest hillsdale grads ever to grace the planet and you guys would like her she's cool and normal so should we sing out this episode? I'm Truman and I'm Claire and we like people