WRFH/Radio Free Hillsdale 101.7 FM - Truman and Claire Like People: Nathan Bly

Episode Date: February 19, 2024

Today, we talk to one of Hillsdale’s distinguished alum, Nathan Bly. We cover the importance of getting a real job, how disgusting things can get in Simpson, and what not to do as an RA. 

I'm Truman and I'm clear and we like people today we like Nathan Bly who was a former resident assistant at the suites and Simpson now he has graduated and is teaching in Georgia so bligh uh as everyone knows your name actually isn't Nathan you're sort of like Obama where everyone just knows you as Bly and no one actually knows your real last name uh can't would you mind telling us what that is? All right. It actually comes from the Norwegian Bly Stone is originally what it was, which is actually Portuguese for toilet. So yeah, we decided to change that when we came to America. So Bly, we decided last week that whoever we had on this week was going to be our dumbest guest yet. How does it feel to be our dumb guest? I feel honored. It's truly a privilege

to be here and be dumb. I've been dumb for years. but I have never been on a podcast before. So this is a first for me. I have been dumb for a while, though. Well, we're so glad to have you the dumbest man to graduate Hillstales College. That's a fair thing. Yeah, I remember when the man who would later be Homecoming King was recording a... I've decided I have to sneak this into every episode.

It's good, it's good. Made a documentary on Fundies at Hillesale. Yeah. remember. I was there. Yep. For some of it. And you said that campus needs more dumb people. Campus does need more dumb people.

And you felt like Glass of Dime breed. So I felt like this would be an opportune visit. Yeah, I think so. I think bringing a little stupidity back to campus is a very good thing. Right after this podcast, you're going to go to the basketball game. I think you were hoping to do Simpson walkdown. Was that a big thing before you and your generation of Simpson residents were here? Yes.

I mean, of course it was. People go to games. People have fun. I didn't invent fun. Speaking of obvious Simpson traditions, if you could have changed one thing about Simpson in your time there, what would it be? I would add a second dog. Is there a dog?

The fact that you don't know that is shameful. You've never met Cody? No. Well, her name is Cody. with a C and an O and a D And what would the name

of the second dog be? I mean, you could go classic and say Zach based off the hit television show the sweet life on the sweet life on deck

Not the sweet like of Zach and Cody mind you could also name him Stalin after the famous or rather infamous dictator Truman's really eating this up

I can see why he wanted to have you. It's so easy with Truman. He laughs at everything. So you sort of touched on this with the Stalin Zaghton dog conundrum. But if you could have added... If you could have added one Simpson tradition, what would it be?

Anything I would add would not be good. So I would add nothing. Okay, that makes sense. Do you have any constructive criticism for the other male dorms? We're not trying to put them down necessarily, but obviously they probably have some flaws since they're not Simpson. So what do you think they could improve? I think they have too many washers and dryers.

And not enough Fortnite. That's me. That's what I believe in. Dirty clothes and Fortnite. What are some of your funniest Simpson or Simpsons? sweets, I suppose, shenanigans that we can mention on the radio. And if there are names of

people that you'd like to be bleeped out in these stories that are incriminating, we can. I think I'm going to censor myself a little bit. There was we spaghettied a kid's room. Not a kid, it was my buddy Dan. We spaghettied his room because

they, it was an odd, they had stolen something from okay, there's actually two things associated with it. So they had stolen something from another hallway, and then they did a raid, but they were like, the raid is going to be on your hallway. So not only do we steal your stuff, but now we're going to make a mess of your hallway. So one of that year, one of the things I did was I replaced their shampoo with ranch, and it took them two days to find out. That wasn't Dan.

That was someone else. and then they blamed someone else and poured ranch in someone else's room and then after that the next year when we did a raid it was on 1FN and it was on 1FS and then we had someone go and throw spaghetti all over

a kid's room and then it dried and you had like with spaghetti it like it peels you just have to peel it and it breaks apart and it was it was good Was there sauce with the spaghetti or was just no, there was just noodles. Just just noodles. No, okay. No sauce.

What do you think your worst abuse of power as an array was? The impromptu dance parties. I forced on my residence. I would sit in a chair and I would be like, dance for me, freshman boy. Was this, did this take place in their rooms or like in a common area? It was, it was always in public. It needed to be sheds. shameful.

So another thing you did while you're at campus was you were admissions tour guide. You also stayed over the summer at Hillsdale one year. What was your favorite experience to come from that? Just driving kids away from the college, walking them around campus, telling them blatant lies. There's nothing quite like it. Flying to 18-year-olds about their future. They really appreciate it. And so to their parents.

I was the number one most requested tour guide in America. Is that just another lie? I would never lie to you, Truman. Yeah, okay. Because you're not 18. I mean, I only lie. I only lie, which is why I'm so good at being a teacher. It's because I'm constantly lying to children.

What grade do you teach? Eighth and ninth grade. Oh, wow. What subject? Mostly algebra. Okay. So. Okay.

Do you feel like you're, you're good at teaching algebra? No. Do you feel like the children like you? I don't care. That makes sense. Do you want that to go, do you want that to go on air? Nathan Blyde does not care if the children like them or not. I have no idea if I would actually, I don't think they'll ever find it.

That's true. And I don't know if they did find it. I don't know. When I was in eighth grade, it's up to you Truman. We had one younger teacher in. our middle school and his name was Ian Handerhan and we looked him up every single day that we could and we found his Christian Mingle account. Yeah, no, that that is why I have a private Instagram. Yeah. And nothing else. You have a MySpace. I have a MySpace. Don't you have threads?

I have tens of all. Oh, yes, threads. The thing, the thing that Instagram sends me, they send me the ads for and they're like, oh, here's a little clip. And I'm like, oh, that's interesting. I want to read more. and then it's like, oh, do you want to download this app? No, I don't. I just wanted to read the next paragraph. That's it. Mark Zuckerberg. Yeah.

Mark Zucker, Buger. What a guy. I don't think we should be making fun of Mark here. That's true. He'll find out. He'll find out. What do you think more people should know before being an admissions council? Well, I'd just like to say that I've always thought highly of the Chinese state as well as Disney.

Not Google, though. And no, no, Google, Google is also great. And that's all, that's all I'll say about being an admissions counselor. So one difference between the two of us is that I won Homecoming King. And I'm a loser. Yeah. Were you on court? Yeah, somehow.

Yes, somehow they put me on court. Yeah, and you lost to Paul Traynor and you two notoriously had a beef already. So what would you say to Paul, if you saw him right now in his old house, maybe at a cocktail party. Yeah, uh, hey Paul, why don't you go play your dumb guitar some more? Playing it the wrong way, stupid. Paul Traynor did make me a coffee today at Checker Records. It was very good. He's a barista? At Checkrex, yeah. God is good. So I would just like Paul Traynor to know if he's listening. It was a terrible coffee.

That I love the coffee he makes and please don't spit in my lattes. I don't associate myself with what Gly's saying. You know, speaking of God, I heard that you recently decided to join the One True Church, by which I, of course, I'm referring to Pastor Jim's Bible Church. Of course. Yeah, could you tell us more about this decision? Because I've been exploring it. I think the evidence that Constantine martyred Pastor Jim right after he buried the correct golden tablets is very compelling. And I don't know, I see that you've made it farther on this journey than I have. So could you tell me more?

It's because I'm a strong man, Truman, and you're a weak man. And if you would like to know more about the church, you know what you have to do. Go to the gym. Go to the gym. And there's your answer. And that's my answer. That's all I'll give you. Speaking of answers, we interview people here at Hillsdale Free Radio 101.7.

Wow. It was very cool. Radio Free Hillsdale. Radio Free Hillsdale. Shameless blood. We're also very professional here. I'm sorry. We will not bow to any sponsor. No.

Also, speaking of answers, what's your favorite quiplash answer? Oh, I was actually, I actually was very proud of this answer. And it was, it was one of those like three, like, what are the three best words in the English language? And it was like zero down payment. It's truck month baby. I was very, I was so proud. I was there. I remember that.

You were there. You were there for that one. What was your weirdest Hillsdale interaction? I was in the drum room. in Howard in the basement and the door was locked because I just you know you can unlock it to always unlock it or just you know I'm going in the room and I was hammering away for about two and a half hours my freshman year and I opened the door or no no I didn't open the door I took on my headphones and I'm almost deaf because those two hours just loud and I just hear this like I hear something and I'm like I wonder if that's about me and then I play I play the drums a little bit more and then I hear you need to get out right now. I'm like, okay. And I go and I open the door and she's staying there. She's like, you've been in here for over two hours and you need to go. And I'm like, there's, I mean, there's not literally time limit to how long, sorry, there's not really time limit to how

long I can be in here. Are you like another student practicing? She's like, she's like, no, I'm the monitor. And I've been trying to do my homework and blah, blah, blah, blah. And I was back, I was a freshman and some of the things I said weren't funny. And I was like, I was like, oh, are you really supposed to be doing homework while you're working? Uh, Dean Pete said that's bad. hmm yeah or uh anyway it just it just kept going on and then like this again because i wasn't funny she goes uh she goes i'm like well you're not telling like a flute player to get out of here and she's like she's like well your instrument is loud and annoying and i'm like how could you

say that about them look at them they're sitting right there right in front of their face um and then it keeps going on and then she goes juries out you're an and i go can i appeal And then eventually she goes, you need to get the fuck out. And I was like, and I'm walking out the door and I'm like, is that language becoming of Hillsdale College? I don't care what's becoming of Hillsdale College. What if Dr. Arnard heard you say that? I don't even care. I've known him since I was a baby.

And it's like, okay, cool, very cool. And then as I was leaving, I was like, when do you work next? And she's like, Wednesday. I was like, I'll see you then. She goes, see you then. And when I showed up Wednesday, I was like, there was like, I talked to the, the, uh, Larry, the drum guy and he's amazing. Uh, and he's like, he's like, just go for an hour. Just like, if you're going to practice, just be there for an hour.

It's okay. I'll be like, that's fair. It's fair. I mean, she had, she had very valid points. It just was funny. But like at an hour on the dot, security comes in. And not only is it like actual security. This is back when they hired students.

So it was my RA. comes into the room to kick me out. And he goes, oh, hey, Bligh. And she's just, like, mortified that I've won, even though security is coming to kick me out as I was packing up. That's insane. It was funny. It was very funny.

That was incredible. Yeah, it was, like, three weeks into school. Bligh, what's an interest or hobby or, like, favorite movie or book or something? And people would be surprised to learn that. I like long walks on the beach. feeling my toes in the sand. You look like you do. I do.

You have that look about you. That's right. I don't like sand. It's coarse and rough. It gets everywhere. That's actually my favorite part. I love, I love showering and then feeling sand still be everywhere. It's so great.

Spring breaks coming up. People can feel this sensation for free. Aren't you going to Florida? I may go to Florida. But I guess we don't want to leak your... Yeah, I'm not going to tell you where I'm going to be. 3, 4, 7, Ocean Wash Drive. Do you have any advice for seniors about how to enter the real world now that you're there?

To actually do it? Sorry, Paul. What does actually doing it look like? Getting a job? Outside of Hill. Outside of Hillsdale. Well, maybe not. Okay, you can get a job with Hillsdale.

Like Brennan Knockleby. He has a real job. Yeah. He's a king. He's the homecoming king. Yeah. Now, imagine that. They went from him to you.

That just, just to give you a vision of how far campus has fallen, Truman. Look at yourself. Look at Brennan Knockleby. You know, maybe my election was actually rigged. And we've gone from a democracy to rule by ballot. The only, I think you were a right. You were like the Mickey Mouse vote and everyone thought there's no effing way this would happen When Arnold Schwarzenegger was governor of California

That's you being homecoming chair. This is me stealing another joke. Do you think he thought of that as a step down? I mean he used to be Mr. Universe. He used to be the Terminator. He controlled the universe and then he became a governor. What's the dumbest mistake you ever made at Hillsdale? Maybe we can mention this on air.

So I should have sent, I, is my first time taking notes in an RA meeting. I made it a whole year without doing it. But it was like I, it was a great meeting. But I sent, I thought we just sent them to the deans. And the deans were like, oh, ha ha ha, funny. No, no, no. I was supposed to send them to the head a's for them to then edit out everything terrible about the meeting notes. So the dean's got the unfiltered one.

and it was right after the Kentucky Wesleyan game where they like got into the stands and almost tried to fight us and I was like future Waffle House managers yell at us angrily during the football game and I was like send

it's pretty bad Who's your favorite couple on campus I would have to say he just graduated but Michael Eller and Rachel Kukagi who also just graduated but I mean have you seen Michael what a guy yeah he wrote a guy you live with him

I do it's amazing he's great I'm so jealous so Jesus calls us to love everyone we'll believe this answer whatever you say who do you love the least on Hillsdale's campus it could be someone from your grid Truman Cajas

you love me so little that you can't even pronounce my name Right. Truman, I don't even love you. It's not that I love you so little. I just despise you. So it's more of a hatred thing than apathy even. If there was a step below apathy, I feel like hatred emphasizes too much care. I care so little about you that I'm not even apathetic towards you. That's my life. Crazy that you came on our podcast. I know, I know. It's amazing he invited me. I was just totally oblivious and unaware of this whole time. I know. And now I'm on your podcast. And now I can tell you I would truly feel. Yeah.

You're talking about what? Truman, I'd like to ask you a few questions. What are you doing right now? What's happening? What is this? You're pretending to run a show. You're going to graduate Mr. Big Shot over here. Homecoming King.

People. Yeah. Mr. Homecoming King. More like, homecoming little turd boy. I don't know. Sorry, that just came out. That was wrong. That's okay.

I've always loved Truman. this is his podcast Truman has friends Fair So you're You're our dumb guest We've decided this already I agree

What's the worst grade You've gotten at Hillsdale Oh okay So it's not Okay So my actual worst grade Was a homework grade For Dr. Hayes class

And he put I was very I didn't want to do it And he failed me And he said Is this the quality of work That satisfies you And I wrote yes

and I had found that like going through all my old notebooks I found that paper and it was so funny it's no fun going back and seeing like good grades but it's fun going back and seeing the failing grades I can also say that during Dr. Smith's Jacksonian America class you could see the average

grades and coincidentally the lowest grade on every paper was the grade that I had gotten so I did the worst on every essay what about like for an entire class for an entire class I think I got a B minus and Cole

and and and a B minus maybe in linear algebra we really need to get someone on the podcast who's gotten worse grades than Sherman and I I mean it was it was kind of help

that it was COVID year okay so it was like you have five days to complete this test and it's like thank you yeah well I think we might just actually be dumb Claire we might be the dumbest people

on Hillsdale's campus, but we have a podcast. The world needs, yeah, exactly. The world needs dumb people in a microphone. The world needs dumb podcasters. Who's your favorite fundee? My favorite fundies will always and forever be probably Paul Traynor. He is the king for a reason.

Someone who's also been just run through the mud on this podcast. Yes, well, I mean, he needs a little ego shot. Yeah. You know, he's like, oh, I play. Would you say those fundies tend to win Homecoming King? No, not at all. Okay. Do you know who won it before?

You two? Jonathan Burton and Burton Ackleby. Brennan Ackleby. Reagan, Dugan. Other people. I mean, they're all fine. They're all very good people. I just wouldn't call him Fundy.

All right. Well, this has been Truman and Claire like people. Today, we liked Nathan Bly. How much would you say that you liked him? On what scale? On a scale of 1 to 18, which is, of course, the ages that he will lie to you. Yes.

I'm going to say. 16 years and 10 months. Okay. I will say this is my first time meeting you. Okay. And it went really well. And you made Truman laugh the most out of I think any guess that we've had. It's so easy.

Also, yeah. It's so easy. You and Troutman. I will say I give you 17 years old. I would give this podcast a one. Makes sense. You hate Truman. The new name of the podcast is everyone.

Everyone hates Truman. All right. Well, thanks for tuning in everyone. Yes, I have a basketball game to go to. You do, yeah. I'm Truman. And I'm Claire. And we like people.

And everyone hates Truman. Everyone hates us. But no one likes to.