WRONG! A Fucked Up Game Show - #22 – GOOD OL' SPORKFOOT (ft. Chris Espinoza, Joe Smith, Minnie El-Taeb)

Episode Date: October 5, 2024

Recorded live at Mic Drop Comedy Club in San Diego, CA, 9/21/24.OUR BRAVE CONTESTANTS: Chris Espinoza, Joe Smith, Minnie El-TaebSUBSCRIBE ON YOUTUBE to watch full shows in glorious HD!⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠���⁠⁠⁠⁠COME SEE US LIVE!⁠⁠⁠⁠ Upcoming Shows:LA: 10/5 @ The Comedy Store, 11:45 PMSUPPORT THE SHOW: https://ko-fi.com/wronggameshowcover photo by Van Corona Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hello everybody. Welcome to another episode of Wrong, a fucked-up game show podcast edition. I'm your host Jay Light, and on this episode, we are featuring our most recent show in San Diego. Our contestants this episode were Chris Espinoza, Joe Smith, and Minnie Al-Taibe. If you like the show, please consider telling a friend, leaving a review, but you definitely need to come see the show live. We are at the Comedy Store tomorrow, October 5th at 1145 p.m. And we've got some more show dates coming up in San Diego and New York City soon. We'll have dates and links for all those in the show notes coming up soon. Also, if you want to see video episodes of the show, please join our YouTube.

You can subscribe. I've got a link to that in the show notes as well. And if you want to support the show, I just set up a Kofi page. Coffee. I'm not sure how it's pronounced, but you can give one-off donations there and help fund the show and support us as we continue for our new endeavors in the world of digital online and life. Um, wrong. No wrong with this stuff. At all.

Because it's not further in here, everybody. Let's get wrong. Welcome to wrong, everybody. Who's based or is this your first time here? Thank you for honestly, we celebrate the rock there. What's your name? Aaron, make some noise for Aaron. He fucked up twice.

Down for some points. Alright, we've got to be here. Here's the good news, everybody. We are at a game show and you guys are an important part of that game show. Who likes game shows? We like it when people do things. That's good.

This is good. That's pretty good. I think they can do a little better. I think we know. Since you are, we're gonna make sure that you guys get some points. But we also have some of the best comics in the city. here to prove who is the most fucked up. That's what it's all about.

We're gonna have some fucked up things happen to them tonight, mostly. Because people think it's funny, we're gonna say some dark things, we're gonna say some dirty things, we're gonna go to some fucked up places. But really, you guys are here to help us commit psychological warfare against the comedians on our line of tonight. We have dug into their past. We have found things that they probably forgot that they had online.

We're gonna ask them, Weird questions, we're gonna get them to some weird places and we're all gonna celebrate it because we love it when things are... Are we called? You guys fucking get it. Make sure you guys for yourself and for us. You're sitting at your tables, we had some cards to fill out some things that asked why you would have fucked up week and that's because you as the audience are the first surprises on the show. Tyler is going to slitch over to our next slide. Worst week. That's when it's time we play. It sucks.

Yes. We are gonna find out who the most fucked up week out of the most fucked up week out of the show. audience members. We have two who we would really like to highlight. These are both, uh, these are both women, I'll say that. We got some people who have, have some issues with bodily fluids in different places. No shit, unfortunately. No shit. Well, maybe, maybe shit. Uh, Christine, where's Christine? It's her birthday? Makes some noise for Christine. Ooh, booed. Who, when we have, fucking points galore tonight. Oh wow. All right. Christine, uh, Christine said her week was fucked up because my boyfriend forgot to wash his balls.

Yeah, which one of these dipshits is your boyfriend? Christine, Christine. What is his reason? Why didn't you watch your balls? No. It's her birthday. It doesn't have to suck your salty, nasty dick. It is her birthday.

Here, Lord. Christine, come on down. Come on to take just a side. Make a laugh for Christine, everybody. The other person who determined was having a pretty fucked up week was Kim. Kim, where are you at? Kim, Kim, right there.

Kim, uh, Kim had a pretty fucked up week. Vomit on my tits. Oh, can you laugh for again, please? Stay a laugh. Most importantly, whose vomit? Oh, wait, he's a crazy story. What happened? Crazy story?

And I, next to me, because he wasn't well, and I heard, ble. So I swing him up, and I'm trying to run. He's 11, so he's not tiny. I'm trying to run to get him to the toilet in time, but I don't make it. And so, booh. And then I'm like, I don't want to clean this shit up, so I'm trying to make like a hole. Trying to make a tit pull to hold.

And dump him off in. So it's not just vomit on your teeth, it's vomit into your tip. as well. Honestly, that's just being a good mom. That's just a good mom. That's just a good mom. Now we have prizes for both of you all. Don't you worry, but our most important precedent is between these two ladies who had the worst week.

Was it Kim? Dude, people hate gross balls. It is gross balls. Son who vomited on my tits. But Tyler, we got prizes for both these wonderful women. Tyler, tell them what they want. Jay, I forgot what we decided to give them, but these are from your girls. These are from your garage.

We found these items. It's a travel. Travel Advil, everybody. Travel Advil for all your headaches. And not only that. He gets travel Advil because of how much of the fucking headache or boyfriend is being in Chris, or Kim, who Chris gets that.

Kim gets this nice humor master's pin. No, no, no, that's for you. You can take one of the advil. I'll allow it. You get that button to put on your vomiting tits. Make some noise. Here, folks, we got some of the best. Best comics here ready to compete now.

Are you guys ready to hear some fucked up jokes? We're going to baby shark it the entire winner. We have asked them to tell us tonight their most fucked up jokes. It might be dirty, it might be dark, but it will definitely be wrong. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Let's go ahead and meet our first contestant of the evening. She is a single mom who's double wide and a triple threat. Mexican.

Despite my physical circumstances. My country's bitch. That's my mom's favorite joke. I just had a baby. My baby daddy is white. I'm gonna be black. My baby daddy's white. I love white guys. I like guys that are so white. When you look at them, you go, yeah.

He stormed the capital. That's a good joke. I can tell that anywhere in the country to fucking chill. USA! U.S.A! U.S.S. My pregnancy was not great when I was about eight weeks along. My baby daddy was attacked by a hobo in Ocean Beach.

I assume you guys are locals. It's 100% sure I'm not right. And that was really scary. He suffered from a traumatic brain injury. But him having a brain injury, it really benefits me. Because now I'm not lying when I say my baby daddy's fucking retarded. I want you guys to imagine saying that joke in North Carolina. saying that joke in North Park.

What's moving? Yes. I was about six months pregnant when I said that joke, and the lady at North Park had a joke, she confronted me and she goes, You think you can say that word? What if your baby's special needs? So, whoa, whoa, whoa, LeBron, I'm not gonna award it.

I fuck them. I got to stop involved. Surprise, I was happy I wouldn't be up here. I don't think that's the worst thing that's ever happened to me. I think the worst thing that's ever happened to me was being cheated on by a frat guy and a wheel wheelchair. I get a red.

Do you want to add to add so much jokes? Just don't. Please don't. I shoot out by a fracket in a wheelchair, so I judge a handicapped very harshly. I'm when I see them. I park into their spots at the store so they can't get out. We'll feel bitch. You can't.

I judge a handicap very harshly. And when I look at them, I always think three things. three things. Do you pay your taxes? Do you treat your women right? And where do you stand morally? Because physically you don't. Okay, this is my impression of women everywhere and becoming the first female VP, okay? Just almost two and a half years and I like retards, I fuck them. I'm like... Oh my God. Someone's gotta do it, Jay. Someone's gotta do it. A thankless job.

Your next contest. Your next contestant, we've done it, folks. Your next contestant has the most generic name in the history of all the comics we booked on the show. Make some noise for Joe Smith, everybody. Welcome up here, host, Ron Dietberg. I don't know if it was dark, but it certainly was emotional for me as an American.

A couple months ago, the events had happened in western Pennsylvania. I don't think are a good look for our country. I don't think it's good. trying to assassinate a former president, potential future president. But I knew that we were going to be okay after that horrific day. I knew Donald Trump was going to pull through. I knew he was going to show his true character in that moment. When that bullet whizzed by his ear,

the secret service surrounded him, that one female agent pressed close, and he grabbed her by the pussy. just to lift himself up and you can hear in the recording he's like get my shoes and that chocha and that was it

let's get out of here I love telling that it's only been a couple months old but every crowd in the world loves it because right can laugh at it left can laugh at it the only person who wouldn't laugh at is Donald Trump he'd be like she was a dog she looked like a less camera

never fucking grab that Nasty, she never walked me, you know how he is. She looks like Ted Cruz's life. Oh yes, get it out. Dark, I'm supposed to have a dark joke. Last year, someone with a terminal illness threatened to end my comedy career. And they lived.

They made it out. I did a show in Nashville. Everyone in the club laughed except this one skinny dude in a wheelchair. You guys are on board of the retard shit. Kicking this poor gentleman. He just didn't understand what I said. Everybody in the room laughed except this skinny, balding dude in a wheelchair. Oh, thank you.

Hey, him. Oh. Sorry. Get around. He was furious. At the end of the show, he rolled all the way. He didn't get up and walk. He wasn't that good of a show.

He rolled his chair up to the stage, and he got right in my face, and he goes, I am dying of cancer, and if it's the last thing I do, I'm going to have you canceled. I'm like, well, then you better hurry up. It might be. Probably not the very last thing. That would be like a shallow...

Like a... And he did what... I said that to him and he did what all of you did. He started laughing and he was like, oh my gosh, I am so sorry. This has nothing do with you. I don't know what got into me. That fucking cancer.

It looks like a lot of it and made some radiation on the hair. In the end, though, it all worked out because he died. No, not from cancer. He was crossing the street when he was canceling Dr. Seuss. He got you by a car.

I live in normal heights, which you may be familiar with if you watch to catch a predator. I moved there, and then I looked at the child molester Mountain. It's like fucking chicken pox all over the place. It's like somebody's little crunch berries on my computer.

And on my street there is a creepy old dude who a lot of people think might be a pedophile. And I'm not. Dude with a young kid, so it looks strange and my daughter and I are in the park holding hands making out. Oh, thanks a lot. My name's Joe Spinn. Joe! Joe! Joe's about people in wheelchairs. He's a lot like Joe Camel.

He's a smoker with bad teeth who looks like he should live in the desert. desert makes some noise that one for a second here to sit by failure makes noise for the very funny Chris Espinosa everybody great playing a fatty and an old guy that's good

so we're supposed to do fucked up shit right okay fuck that shit I was not really good at dating I was seeing this girl for a while one night we were watching Netflix we're watching crime documentaries like a bunch of husbands

killing wives and boyfriends killing girlfriends and shit of cool stuff But it gets weird because she leans in, she's like, oh, I hope you don't kill me one day. Fucking white women, right? What a white woman statement? Holy shit. So you know what I did?

I said that equally crazy statement back to her. I was like, hey, sweetie, you have nothing to worry about because I'm only going to kill somebody I love. Yeah, and some of you think it's fucked up. I think it's smart, you know? Because I didn't have to say I love you for like six months, you know? When I did, that shit was a threat. Now you get it, okay. I'm in therapy.

Yeah, anybody else in here? White? Capped a little too soon, doggy. Yeah, it's a white person thing. You guys invented it. Yeah, I know it's a white person thing because I told my Mexican mom I was in therapy and she was like,

Like, Weko, you don't need therapy, you're just not eating enough. I got anxiety. It's hard to get through the day. I got to talk to somebody. She's like, yeah, I got anxiety too. I think my son's gay. I got give her to her to her, too. It's like I'm forming arts, I'm in therapy.

That's two out of three, you know what I mean? Okay, you know? I didn't like that much. I have a daughter, you know? I spend time with her. I do simple shit with my daughter. Like on Sundays, we used to go to Walmart. Mark.

Fuck you guys, all right? I spend the time with my daughter. What are you doing? Yeah, dude. We would go on Sundays to check out the fish that they used to have. She really liked it. She liked checking out the fish. But one day, here's a problem, one day we actually showed up and the fish were gone.

And I'm, yeah, it was sad. And I talked to the cashier. I was like, hey, man, what happened to fish? fish he's like oh you're not gonna believe this somebody was coming in here getting the small fish and feeding him to the big fish He's fucked up That's so fucking you just need more fucked up? I had to look my daughter my crying daughter in the eye that's because we're not doing fishy Sundays But I was like hey, you know what on the bright side? We got away with that shit Quality time

Let's see I I attended like DM girls on Instagram. That's not like you know I Somebody really related to that shit. That's my move, I DM girls on Instagram right? And one time I was DMing this trans woman. Oh, yeah. I look, hey, well first of all, I had no idea she was trans, okay? I had no idea, not that I have a problem that you could be trans, you know, trans, I'm not transphobic, that's not who I am, but also at the same time, put something in your bio.

I feel like, yeah, seriously, I think that's fair, you know what I mean? Something that knows what I'm stepping into, like, you know, like a gay flag or something, you know? Simple, you know what I mean? Or like an eggplant with a present, surprise, bitch. Give me something, you know what I mean? That's only one. You know what she did put in her bio? She put crazy Latina and I was like, fucking sign me up, thug. She took that shit. She told me after two weeks of messaging back and forth, but she's like, look, I just want to be completely trained

transparent. Hey, fuck you, dog. That's good. She's like, hey, I used to be a man. I won't let you know. And I don't know how to respond, you know, because I don't want to offend her in any way. I take too long. She did messages back, hey, are you not saying anything

because you found out it was trans? Fuck. This is how you got canceled. I got to tread lightly, you know what I? So I texted her back. I was like, sweetie, I'm so sorry. It's not what it looks like. I'm actually racist. I mean Chris guys, thank you so much. Come to night.

Chris, that's my house. And Joe and Chris. What a wonderful person. Remini and Joe. Microphones for you guys. Tyler, why don't you go out and tell us how everybody's doing on the points? Wow, what a fucked up round. It was great. Joe, Fired points, Chris, Farner points, and for admitting that she picks on disabled people and fucks her retard.

Six hundred points for Minnie El-T-Eve. After the first round. Uh, I feel like I would. I feel like I wish I was retarded so I could fuck me. That's not it. I mean, my parents are watching my kids until midnight, so. Access van, the mini can fucking side. Well, I'll send my truck, please.

I'll hide away. You're disabled, but we could go with those too. The extra wide loads. Joe? These brown people talk a lot. I'm sitting next to the 20th Highjacker. Albers Khalifa. I didn't love this show.

Let's go ahead and move on to our next round. This is our first piano game. You guys might have heard of a game called Whose Line Is It Anyway? We're playing Whose Foot Is It Anyway? Foot people in the roof to check, Open Toad Shoes. Jeans, you're a real Sandy Ing. This is a show.

We love talking about feet, Jack. We love this. Let's set, we gotta screen cap that so we can put that in the next time. put that the next time he played this fucking game. She said it for she was size 16. We get it bitch, he got a big dick. I don't believe that. Yeah, yeah, I don't believe that.

Show us your dance. James flashing back. Oh shit, I broke when I did that. I can see when he lifted his leg up, I just saw a little teeny voice fucking out. And his arms are all crossed. He's got to hold the excess up under his belly. He's got to make sure. Here is a game where we went to our pals at WikiFete.

Wikifete is a website where you can look up celebrity feet. You two are nodding so vigorously. I love that so much. We have some celebrity feet who we're going to show off, and our comedians are going to try their best to guess whose feet they are based on the pictures and the comments. So we're going to show, just to show you how the game works, we've got an example set of feet here.

Now this is a little tricky. We got two sets of feet. This is somebody... This is an audible ooh. I heard Ben Affleck and... Those are Justin Bieber. This is... Justin Bieber.

That's McCauley was like. That's what that is. See, I think based on the skin tone, this is me and then Jesus carrying me across the sand. He was there when there was one set of footsteps in the sand. So we got one comment to show just to get you in the mood here. This comment is from somebody 21. No spam 21. No spam 21.

Surprisingly nice feed for coming from a dad he has. Question mark, question mark, question mark. Now, you guys don't have to worry about getting points on this one. This one does of course belong to Donald Trump Jr. These are Donald Trump Jr. Just shy of Two stars. Just so I have two stars. You're going to trade with you, actually.

I know, right? So now we know how the game works. So Minnie, Joe, and Chris are going to have to guess some celebrity feat. We are going to start out showing a feet. Now, you can lock in your guess at any time. You just got to let us know you're locked in. If the audience has any

suggestions, once we get to a point, we'll let you guys know. Raise your hands. If you've got somebody thinking of who it is. Our first set of feet that they're going to on his right back here look at these feet look at these Elton John feet you got a good guess I like that call on the poker it looks like the pony we got many who does think maybe Elton John we don't no there'd be Tom if it was Elton John Joe the trousers suggest Colonel Sanders Chris what about you you got any guesses it's it's hard to guess on fucking

You know what I'm trying these are Bono's feet. I don't know why. No, we're gonna show, uh, let's show up our first comment here. First comment comes from, I love daddy feet. What? Five stars, beautiful feet. Honestly, they are really well taken care of. Nice toes, bet those soles are super soft. I think I kind of love his feet. Wish there were more picks. What is this?

It's whose foot is it anyway. Who is the comments or something? I love daddy feet. Anybody want to change their guess? We can see the next comment if you don't. Brandon Fraser is fat. Brandon Fraser fat phrase. Good guess.

Wow. Alright, let's go in to see your next comment then. Mac 37. Why do his feet look like they need a diaper and overnight care nurse? Let's see our third comment. I'm also destroyed. Don't you worry. You can't deny they are clean and beautiful.

Just because you don't like him as a person, you can't deny it. It's not Wiki personality. It's Wiki tweets. Can we pass? Donald Trump would never win. You ask him pass. Minnie and Joe and Chris do you have to guess. Who do you guys think this year?

Who's fear of these? I'm looking at Brendan Fraser when he was fat. We're going Brendan Fraser when he was fat. People love Brendan Fraser. And it's not because I voted for him, but I'm going to say Donald Trump. We got Donald Trump. Uh, you know, I want to go with another president. I think it might be RFK.

RFK. Not a president, but okay. Hey, shut up. I mean, I have never voted. We got Hulk Hogan. I like Hulk Hogan. We got pass. Let's go ahead and see.

It is Donald Trump. He's voting for him. He's voting for sure. 1.27 out of five starts. This poor man. It's the only time I've been. ever said this poor man about Donald drunk. I mean, if we're grading on this scale, all of anybody's crazy.

Let's go and show our next pair of celebrity feet. One foot. One blurry foot. Well, manicured, it looks like... Will Smith? Is somebody say Will Smith? Yeah. You see what color those... That's the skin are, right?

No, I don't see color. I just hear it. Let's show our first comment, guys. This one is coming from Jim H. He's most definitely not a very well-liked individual, but even I can't deny the fact that he is nice, smooth as silk feet, even willing to give him a foot massage if he wanted one.

He's asking consent. Harvey Weinstein, good guess. Hey! I like Harvey Weinstein. Why don't all the feet people have white pants on? Epstein. Epstein is me. All right, sweet fit, siver down.

We've got some good options. I told you, I don't see color. What color? Those are white feet. That's a white guy? That's a white guy. That's a white guy. That's why we wear white peat.

He could be tan, Eustine. I will say Epstein still on the forest. You know what? I trust that Epstein. She stole my job. You mean you can also say yes, if you what? Do I get points? Yeah.

Epstein. You guys, you saying is Epstein Joe? I've seen Epstein's feet up close. Is it not Jeffrey Epstein's feet? How about Joe Biden? Joe Biden? Let's show, uh, let's show the, the next comment. This is another one from I Love Daddy Feet, who rated these five stars.

He's getting around, dude. Let's be honest, this man is super cute and his feet are just as beautiful as I expected. I've been crushing on him since he used to wear that corny bow tie. Epstein. Tucker Carlson. Tucker Carlson, Bill Knight. I'm cutting up, I'm cutting off the audience, because I do think he's We have three valid options. We got Tucker Carlson, we got Bill Nye, we got Jeffrey Epstein.

We got Jeffrey Epstein. Wait, does Jeffrey Epstein wear a bowtide? I mean, not anymore. He had something else down there. Yeah, yeah. In the suicide game, they call that a Mettie. Because he definitely killed himself. Who's low-tides? Yeah, what do you guys think? Manny, Joe, Chris, locking some guesses.

All right. I'm going with Epstein. F-S. Woo! Epstein. I'm staying on brand and go with Tucker Carlson. Tucker Carlson, all right. Yeah, I'm gonna lean on F-C too.

Yeah, that seems good. Let's see if we're leaning on F-C or if we're going someone else. It's Tucker! That is, I love daddy feet right there. There he is. I'd like to point out, these are quite highly rated 3.66 out of 5 stars. Makes praise. That's good.

I see Joe up there pretending he doesn't know every foot. Is fucking Republican? He knows feet. This is bullshit. You can say, I'm just waiting for Nancy Pelosi's feet. We do have a woman as our final celebrity foot. We are going to show her feet right now. Take a look at those bad boys.

Jaila. Hoda! As in Hoda, fun to Germanic. Yerobit. That's right. You know, shit. We got Hoda. Melania.

Options. Fun. Jessica? Oh my god, the whole thing is crazy. Now let's go ahead and show off our first comment here. Let's see you can narrow it down. Good old sport foot. Does this narrow it down for any history?

I think it's a women's World Cup hero of 1994, Brandy Chastain. Brandy Chastain, nice. How old are you, dog? 97 years old. Chris, did you have any guesses? I think Melania. Melania? Okay. She's tall. She's model.

Okay. She's Sporkfoot? Let's see. Let's see it. You got anything else, Chris? I want another comment. Let's see another comment. Let's do another comment.

Below average, but maybe okay, when in a pinch. Did this do it? In a pinch for what? When you're running low on feet? Yeah, when you're running low on feet picks. Wait, Jay. To come. Tylo.

Jay, it's quarterback out. This guy's been a member since 2010. So he's been around. He commented this in 2021. He's been around for 11 years on WikiPhee. This guy knows this. This guy has been in a pitch before. He has known.

He's been back to the corner. Back in the time before Instagram feedpitch. Let's see our final comment. Let's see our final comment. Got ourselves a Harvey Dent here. Sometimes fit and attractive. Other times she looks like she got mulled by a gremlin, man. It rubbed off on her.

Brittany. Yeah. Is it Britney bitch? No, Britney's calves are bigger than that. I've studied them. I don't think Britney has big feet. I think Britney's all cute and fatigue. All right?

It's, uh, no, her- Jessica, Susan, Bruce Jenner. Bruce Jenner. All right, let's simmer down. Let's simmer down. We gotta get some guesses. Someone said Bruce Jenner.

Hey, we're not dead naming here. Thank you. Also, Caitlin's feet are definitely good. I would almost guarantee you. You know what Amanda Binds? I don't know why. I like that. Very excited about the brand Amanda Byn's speech. She feels like a sport-foot-ass.

Sport-foot-ass bitch. I feel like I need to, the first two right, and I feel like I need to get this one wrong. Who do you think it is? It's Michelle Obama. Obama. Minnie, who do you think it is? I'm going with Melania.

Well, she's stick with Melania. The correct answer is Marjorie Taylor Green. Hey, send me that slide. I would like to point out she has a worst foot score than fucking Tucker Carlson. So good job Tucker Carlson, and that was who's put is in anyway, everybody. It makes some fun. I sat through that and you fucking played along. Thank you for turning around on not being grown.

You know what? We're going to give you a prize for turning around and not being grossed out by this. game. This is what we like. Tyler, what do we give her? What are we giving her? This is also from Jay's Garage. I don't know. I think you tried to sell this as MERS and it didn't work out. It's sober enabler, Cozies. Coesies? Yeah, Coesies.

Yeah, no one even clapped for that. Everyone's like, is that the prize? We're out. That's the price. All right, folks. We're going to go on to our next game. This is a game where we, like I said, are going to do some psychological work. Thank you for thank you for turning around and not being grossed out. gross data. Something you've probably said before.

I mean, you were very weird. You can play hard. I just imagine you saying that to your wife. She started at a champ for Epstein. I mean, honestly, yeah, Beck doesn't deserve points. I don't see what the fuck we're even sitting in here for.

Let's go and move on to our next game. This is a game called the Discomfort Zone, everybody. Let's fucking go. That's right. We have dug deep into these comedians' pasts. We have found some things that we have some questions about, some uncomfortable questions. We're going to ask them these questions right now, and their job is to answer in the funniest

way possible. We're going to start off with Minnie, I'll tell you. Minnie coming up here to the hot Mike Stan. Make choice for Minnie, everybody. Guys, you guys, if you have any questions, if you like to chime in, don't forget, you do have Mike's hot, Tyler is keeping score based on how funny and how fucked up you're being. Minnie. You referenced it during your set. We do have a clip that we can skip past, I think, Tyler.

You talked about your Vadi daddy being white. Your exact wording was you like guys that are so white. They look like they could have stormed the Capitol. Yes, something like that? Yes, that's what I said. Okay. The guy's sitting right there. Blood sugar is low.

Our question for you, We gotta know. Are you, you're currently single, single mom? Yes. I'm currently pregnant. You guys were all thinking it, relax. I am very excited then for this game because we've got some love matches for you.

Oh, okay. Some potential love matches. But our question that we're gonna need you to answer, we have some eligible bachelors who we found from the people who are wrestling stormed together. We're going to show you some pictures. of some of the white guys who were arrested while storming the Capitol.

And you're gonna have to tell us if they are too white for you, if they're just your type. All right? I'm ready. I love the USA. Keep saying that. Your first option, your first knowledgeable bachelor, is a gentleman named Nathan Bear. Nathan Bear was actually just finally arrested.

Bro. Nathan, actually Nathan is from Asheville, North Carolina. He is 43 years old and he is an opera singer. No, he is a picture of Ben taken doing opera at the Brooklyn Academy of Music in New York City. He was also arrested up very recently for his role in January 6th. Is he too white or is he good? What do you think? No, I like him looking like cream cheese. A bitch is hungry.

I mean it looks like that bitch is also hungry. That guy's fucking skinny. I feel like he likes big animals. Let's go show what you got what you guys have to say? Oh, you've done shows in Asheville. He looks like every dude in Asheville where you can't tell if they're homeless or not. It's like the world's most interesting unhoused man. You can't tell if he like knows the violin because he's a person. the violence because he's a broad jury if you picked it up in rehab. You know, that's the kind of vibe I get with it. It looks like when he gets sick, they give him lemons to rub on his skin.

They give him leeches. Yeah, like he looked at it. It's very bad. Very bad. Let's go and show up our next eligible bachelor. This is a gentleman named Isaac Samuel Yoder. Give it up for a white Isaac. Look at a white Isaac. Isaac has the distinction of being one of the first people arrested after January 6 because everybody recognized his George Washington costume that he's excited to wear. He is a 32-year-old virgin.

Yes. From Nevada, Missouri, confusing. And he owns a locksmith business. Of course he does. Is Isaac. What do you think about Isaac? Oh, but he owns a locksmith business? He does own a locksmith business.

Maybe let me open your key. Couldn't even get that out. That fucking sucked. I don't think he's too white. I love cosplay. Dad loves history, so I think they get along. I love it. I want to do it right now. Let's make a baby. What do you think? He's gonna cross the Delaware for that pussy. You're gonna do some Thomas Jefferson role play? Is that your plan? All right, thank you for the two people. That was a good job.

For a time for Jay. That's a good joke. I don't understand why people were critical of the DC police letting those guys. I think you're good. Charles Jeff's a fucking slaves. Oh, are they part of the photo? Is he texting in that photo? He is texting in that photo.

Oh, you're not gonna believe where I'm at. He's dressed like a retunge. That's probably why many ones to fuck this story. Ding, dig. That's the weird. Our next, our final guy, our final eligible bachelor, this is a gentleman named Kyle Fitzs from Maine. There's a patriot. That is a patriot. He's willing to bleed for his car.

He did, yeah, he did attack some cops. He got hit by a police baton, but he did try and shoot cops with a crossbow. Okay, this guy rocks. This guy, Lopi, rocks. And I will say, before he was serving time, he did have a great job at a grocery store. He'll keep you fed. Sounds like, many. Minnie. I think out of the three, I want him the most. I plead every month too. So we have a lot of...

Nice work, Minnie. Very well done. All right, Joe, it's time for you. Joe, get on up to the hot stand. You take, or you keep you, you know what? Whatever, you guys trade it off. I can do that. I don't wear rubbers.

I don't wear rubbers. Just in case anybody wants to know. All right. So we, uh, we, I was surprised you didn't talk. I was surprised you didn't talk about this. The last time we were working here together, you told a story that you've since talked about it on your podcast, you posted about it on your Instagram.

This post, in fact, is something you turned into merch. This is a photo. What a whore I am. That's the one tonight. Escatito. Yeah, it's $20 to get a shirt of Joe being soft canceled at a, what was it, a brewery, right? That is Carnegie Hall where that's happening.

Give us the scoop. Just give us the bullet points of what happened here. I got attacked by a Mexican woman because I said something very hateful to her. She said... Nice to my Thea. I said she was acting like a white woman. I apologize to the crowd and I said, hey, I just want to apologize for this white lady who didn't get enough attention growing up. up. And she stood up and goes, Soi Mexican. And I said, Como did he say Karen. And there's a lot more that could go.

There's a lot more, but that's all we need to know, right? That's funny. Now you did describe yourself on your podcast as soft cancelled after this. Yeah. Which as you defined it was being canceled when you have nothing to lose. That's exactly right. You can't take my skin from me. That's part of what makes this show so fun. None of us have anything to lose, and I love this show, because we have a question for you about being soft canceled.

Joe Smith. Would you rather be completely unknown forever and be able to say whatever you want, or be the most famous comedian in the world, but have to personally apologize to every single person that you offend? There's a lot to take in there. Billions of dollars. Billions of dollars. Millions of dollars. Not completely unknown. You got a manager back here in the back row.

You ask me to be on the show after all. You would admit you get demoted to completely unknown. Be the famous comedian in the world would I have to personally apologize. Oh god, I'd much rather be a former. Ah, woo! Yes! Why is that? Give us the why. We're repulsed by talking to, first of all, every person in the world that.

that I've offended. And you know, white people these days can't get away with saying enough. No, fuck, no. I mean, because you're not a comic if you do the second one. That's a fucking spirit. That's what I have to say.

Fuck that, I'll sell out, take a second one. I don't give a fun. Easy, good stuff. Let's go ahead and move on to our final. Chris Espinosa. Uh, uh, Chris. Chris is, uh, Chris is a famous actor. Oh wow. Yeah yeah yeah. Yeah look where I'm at. Chris's, Chris has been on a few things. Chris was on an episode of criminal minds.

You're close. You were really close. Chris tells about this in-page. Like one of them. Say they booked me to look like, they wanted somebody that looks like they ate all of their victims, you know? Just so bad. How did you get into character for this, by the way? What did you get into character for this, by the way? What Don't you imagine that this nameless... Whoa, whoa, whoa. Uh, well, first of all, I was Cedra Torre's motherfucker. All right. I had a name and everything, and, uh, I just channeled my uncle.

You know what uncle I'm talking about. The uncle. The uncle. You're the uncle, aren't you? All right. Now, this is not the only role you play. This is not the only action role, Chris. I can't wait to see the next. Yeah, yeah, I work.

Chris works. I fucking work, right? Okay, we believe you. Not all of it's on, not all of it's on IMDB. Some of it he does just post on his Instagram, like this picture of him as a terrorist. It means ballistic missiles, specifically. Okay, directors know their type, Jay.

Yeah, fattest terrorist. That's what... Did you... Everybody else on set was an emic, dude. It was crazy. Yeah, this one, this is a hashtag, Hashtag blessed. Hashtag, you didn't put hashtag terrorist in the end.

Also next to that, hashtag just got on a watch list, hashtag with this picture. The guy in the last looks like hashtag fuck Ramadan. We also found you have a recent role, you were in a feature film very recently, called Psychic Visions. You played a role that I think the person who wrote the script didn't know how to spell correctly. Psychopath Kidnapper. I can still... Legitimately. I'm not legitimately.

Nothing legitimate on this. That's not how it's fun. Okay. The path is one word. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, no, no, no, no. The kid that were gonna be hiking if you want, but... There's a thing, I typed that in to high a d'ee myself. There's just a couple, like, there was a hiking path here yesterday, right there they go.

Anyway, check out my film on Tooby, if you guys gonna check it. If you want to see, here's some of this best part from this movie. Hey, pretty lady. You ever have sex with a lot of pain? A lot of blood? What you're doing, huh? I'm going to come up with us. My daughter was kicking?

So we did watch parts of the real movie to prep for the show. I did. I watched you find a blockbuster video. I drove all the way up to Eugene Oregon and back to prep for this. It is on Jimmy. The scene plays out basically as it did in the trailer, but there's a line in the trailer where you say, Hey, pretty lady. Do you like to have sex that gets violent?

Maybe a little bloody. Yeah, yeah. I improv that. I improv bit. This is the guy who said, I love to go to people's DMs. Method acting. We're going in. No, hey, I'm researching a role.

Joe, how many rolls have you had in Hollywood? Oh! That's why I'm unscathed by this. I wasn't touched. I have Hollywood. Chris. Yeah. We have a question for you.

Based on these three parts, these three iconic Princess Minosa roles. Yeah. Fuck Mary Gill. Let's go! Terrorist or Psychopath Kidnapper. Oh, my God. Oh, okay.

All right, for sure. I'm gonna fuck the MA. You don't have a choice, dude. Don't feel... It's what they do. I think I'd kill the terrorists because I'd kill the terrorists because that feels just, right? Yeah, yeah. America!

So pandering. Stop pandering. Stop pandering. And then, um, I'm sorry, fucks. Uh, and then, yeah, I marry the psychopath. Yeah, yeah. Path. Whatever.

Whatever. I have a girlfriend. It's the same shit. I don't give a fuck. I have a girlfriend. I'm not kidding. I get it. That's your final answer? Yeah, those are, I lock those in, yeah, yeah. Fuck the inmates, kill the terrorists, marry the psycho. Good answers. Thanks for Chris. What else, everybody. I say that.

Tyler, how's everybody doing on the points? This is a fucking fun time. This is a very close game. Right now, tied in third place, Chris and Minnie with 1,500 points. And Joe, just all over the place with 1,700 points. 1700 points in the first place. Wow, no one agrees with me.

But he is. Fuck you guys also. He also got all the feet right. He's getting a lot of horses. You did get all the feet right. Aaron, we're gonna give you one of these two, by the way. Good job. Thanks for Aaron, everyone. Fee, Fee, Fee, Fee, Fee.

We have one more game, our comics are going to play to try and win this fucked up game. It is a game where we're gonna do a favorite thing that comedians have seen. You guys have been on social media lately. You know the art of crowd work has never been bigger than it is before right now. The arts.

Comics asking questions of the audience, try and connect with them a little bit. But we thought, hey, how do we fuck things up make the comics ask deliberately bad questions to trying to alienate the audience with a game called CrowdWork Comicasi. So what we have done, my producers and I, we have come up with some questions. Our comics are going to do a little bit of crowdwork to talk to you guys a little bit, but at some point during their question asking, they are going to hear the following sound.

They are going to hear the following sound. There we go. When that sound plays, they're going to get a question. that I'm going to bring to them that they have to ask right then and there to whoever they are talking to in the crowds. Make it natural, weave it in, seem like you just came up with it yourself. And when you hear this sound, we can crash and burn officially, we can clap them off and then we can move on to the nice contestant. I'm going to show you guys a little bit of how it's done. Don't you worry.

Hello, sir. What is your name? Rob. Rob. Rob. Do you always look like you have aides? This is a guy. you have AIDS this bad? Welcome, Rob. Thank you. What's your diet? Fucking celery forever.

Hi, Rob. It is celery? Forever? Yeah, we're vegan. You're vegan? I'm surprised you haven't mentioned it to us yet the entire rest of the show. Oh, you do CrossFit, too?

I feel like, that's true. Yeah, vegans ain't CrossFit. They do you tell you. I feel like you could not even lift a cross to get fit with. I feel like... Like he couldn't get up the steps in the Capitol. If he's like trying to flip one of the tires, you'd have to flip a fucking bike tire.

Now here's a question. Dami the elf. It's not just what you look like. It's a question I have for you. Dhabi the elf, how many beers would it take? So, Dhabi the sober, I like that, I like that a fucking freak. Dobby the elf. Dobby to Elf.

Oh, Dobby. Dobby. From Harry Potter. Yes, Dobby loves beer, so... Three. You're giving him three beers to fuck you? That is the most vegan shit I've ever heard. You poppy.

He said it takes about a six-pack. I love this. Make some noise, everybody. Makes some noise. Kassie works, everybody. We are going to start off... I'm going to be back to Ports of Facility Day questions. We are going to start off...

He's in the lead right now, Joe. Joe's in the league. Now you're going to start off with Joe Smith. Joe, you're going to go first. Come on up, take your stance, pick your poison. Make so nice for Joe Smith, everybody. All right, fire away. What's happened?

Did you expect to be seated right here tonight? Do you speak? Do you speak English? She said that. She said that. I thought it. I thought it, I've been sitting there the whole time. You got Google Translate on your phone.

Do you have reading glasses on top of your head? Okay. What did you order to drink or eat? Anyway, the Jews, you're eating glasses, please. Can you do that thing with your tongue that my sister does? Oh, she can. You do speak English? All of a sudden, let me see your papers.

What was the end? answer? Yes. Yes. And what do you think my sister does to me? An English, por favor. What's the total amount of fingers that have ever been inside you? Two.

How many fingers have been in me? Have they been in the same place? So she can do that thing. Shout out to this couple who sports you. Thank you too. All right, let's go and move on. Trying to chime in, let's get Minnie I'll tell you up there. Makes noise for Minnie everybody. A bitch loves to talk.

Bitch loves to chop. This motherfucker, he laughed so hard on my jokes. Hell yeah. So what do you, who are you here with? Who's his girlfriend Ash? Baby, baby, I'm talking to them, but we can talk about it. I wish I was as drunk as you. I have a kid to go home too. Fug!

My brothers text me, how do you put her to sleep? Figured! Alright, so you're here with the lovely girl? How long you guys been together? Like almost a year. When you got to pop the question? Oh, yeah. The question is, how many fingers?

Oh, I'll ask you a question. All right. Motherfuck. If coming was an Olympic sport, what medal would you win? How would what? Like a doughnut? Okay. Um, if you woke up with your dick and inch in your home,

an inch in you, would you go forward or backwards to get out? Pussy. So, dis-respective. Um, I think he'll be able to We gotta do one, folks? Okay. I love the Q. Please.

We're up here. All right. You ask this guy questions. All right. Cream crew or squirt squad, bestie. Minosa. Sexual questioning tonight. Yeah, thank you.

Will we keep it horny or will we change it up? Only one way to find out who you got? Who you talking to? Uh, this big, tall idiot. Yeah. What? You have an insane amount of confidence for not being that good looking, you know? It's like he's tall and it's like I can treat people like shit.

Fuck you, dogs, you know? You're gonna feed her out, you're disgusting. Uh... On a scale of 1 to 10, how clean is your asshole right now? Negative 2, shut up. No, seriously, how's your asshole, dog? That's clean as his feet. Who the fuck?

Who's that? Was that you? Christine, what's that? Are you trying to have a weird birthday? I don't know what's... That's your wife? Well, your wife is trying to fuck a tall white kid. Bring him in.

You're like, your question. You're like, god damn it. No, it's this long. I can't read. I'm not good. I'm reading. actor. Not much of that.

Yeah. At least pretending I can read. I faked it. All right. Half-kidnapper. Being John Malkovich is cool. It's a cool move.

Cool. Chris, this one's in English. Whoa, whoa, wait on. Reset. Reset. Sounded out. Okay, it's a one. Being in John Malkovich is a cool movie.

If you, shut up. If you had your turn, fucking eat a Twinkie, relax. I think it's talking to you. If you could put your whole hand inside a person and control them, who you pick and why, yes, I mean your hand inside somebody's ass. Jay, you should book that table next time. Let's bring this guy on, man. This guy's want to do this shit. shit. So, I answer the question now. Well, Smith.

Nope, nope. That's not, that's not what I have here. That's the correct answer is Alex Jones. The correct answer is our wonderful crowd. Yeah, you guys have crushed it. That was crowdwork kamikaze, everybody. And Tyler's going to tally up the scores, but while we do that, we want to make sure you get out of here. We're done with the show, practically. We got Tyler's going to tally the scores. I know. sad. But the good news is it is wrong. But the good news you can come back here. We'll be back here next month. We got more shows. We got stuff all the time. Our comics, if you like them, they're about to tell you one more joke to make sure you get out of here on a nice note. I see some sour faces in the audience tonight. We're going to make sure we're clean and wholesome and nice to that. So we're going to end with a pallet cleanser joke from all of our comedians. They're each going to tell you one clean, wholesome joke. And then we're going to find out who wins, who loses, and who gets the big fucking

prize. Let's go ahead and stir up. That's not going to fucking turn. Let's stir up with Minnie, I'll tell you. My grandma had breast cancer. So they had to chop off one of her boobs. She's cured now. So she's an amputeeatty. Thank you. All right, let's keep it on for Joe Smith, everybody. Joe Smith. Thanks. Y'all have been great. I want to just close here with

a personal sort of experience. I don't know if it's ever happened to you where you sort of meet someone, you feel like you knew them from a different life, a different existence. You look very familiar, that sort of thing. I met a guy a few weeks ago whose name was Pete Baca.

And I was like, Pete Baca? By any chance, do you have a brother named Chew? Long brown hair kind of Downsy? And he goes, no. I know, I know it's dumb, but it's happened a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away. Getcha! Kill them all to eat! One more thing else from Joe from Chris Espinosa, everybody.

Make some of Chris. I'm going to, hey, um... I'm gay! Guys, guys, you gotta leave on a good note. I just finished reading a book about ADHD. It took me three years. years. It was great. It was the only book that did have an ending. It was just blank pages. Thank you.

Come on down. Make some noise for Tyler Mesford. What prizes everybody got? Let's roll through. Let's see what we got for our prize. One more time for all the committee and you saw it. It's with 2,000 points. It's the actor. It's Chris. This is Fuluzza, everybody. Chris. Again, all prizes are from Jay's Garage. It's a lifetime supply of hairplug.

Here, Plus. Love it. Thank you. Very close game in second place. What a 2100 points. It's Joe Smith, Joe Smith. You're supposed to use these at our wedding. Elaine Maxwell. One more said, you guys were great for you being at 1-1.

...free card just for playing. This show happened is bad for you. Now, I feel like so much better, but we'll see it better next time. You guys have been a great audience. This wrong makes me for a contestant. Thank you so much for doing back next month. back next month if we want to get the rent-up balls down around the answer we will see you next time and have a great rest of your night and weekend bye bye