WTF with Marc Maron Podcast - Episode 1319 - Adam Ray

Episode Date: April 4, 2022

Comedian Adam Ray was a high school athlete, a musical theater performer, and an acting student with his eyes on Hollywood. But one thing he never could shake was the feeling of being an overweight kid when he was younger. Adam and Marc talk about how doing comedy helps keep feelings of insecurity at bay and why the two of them struggled to get over their fears of being on stage. Adam also talks about playing Jay Leno on Pam and Tommy, Vince McMahon on Young Rock, and Wolverine at the Universal Studios theme park. Sign up here for WTF+ to get the full show archives and weekly bonus material! https://plus.acast.com/s/wtf-with-marc-maron-podcast. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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what the fuck nicks what's happening i'm mark maron this is my podcast welcome to it i am. I recorded this yesterday. I was on a plane this morning, and I got up very early. I got up, and it was dark out. I'm driving the rental car. You know, it cuts both ways, this road business. Today on the show, I talked to Adam Ray. All right? He's a comic.

I see him at the store all the time he's an actor he's currently on nbc's young rock where he plays vince mcmahon and he played jay leno on hulu's pam and tommy miniseries also has a podcast called about last night i also used to have a podcast with uh brad williams and uh i i it was one of these weird things. I told them I'd do it, and I parked on the street, and I parked right in front of a driveway to an apartment building's parking lot. And my car was towed, and I had no idea how it happened. I don't know what the fuck I was thinking.

So anyways, it can cut both ways, my friends. This life, this life. What did I have? A couple of weeks in between the long sets. And I had some pretty great sets. I've had some pretty great sets. Sometimes you're really in the groove and my groove is very close to who I am. And I don't know when it's going to happen and for how long. It's an, it's an interesting thing. Sometimes it happens right away and it stays locked in all the way through. Other times it starts off a little rocky. Not bad. It's not like people don't like me who come to see me. They're there to see me, but it's fragmented because there's a little

chaos in the room. And I know I'm choosing to be my own opener because I think an evening with Marc Maron in that sense, where I'm seeing it as a performance a singular performance of a relatively structured theatrical event that is me and I'm doing like an hour and a half to two hours so why not just go do it I don't know who made these rules about opening acts or whatever I guess sometimes I think I don't know if made these rules about opening acts or whatever. I guess sometimes I think, I don't know if it's good for the show. I know it's good to get people settled in their seats. And it's probably good for that performer. But I'm just trying to forego it to try to create a different expectation around what I'm doing.

Because I feel at the end of a show, the shows I been doing like i've been through something i'm not doing an act i know there are bits but i do i'm trying to feel like there's an arc to this thing but all i'm saying is i got down there i got down there a night early i stay at kimpton's i stayed at the sylvan in atlanta it was okay but i'll tell you something honestly they should probably tell you if their fucking hotel is going to turn into a goddamn nightclub on the weekend. That shouldn't be a surprise. It should be there when you book it, like right at the top. Welcome to the Kempton Sylvan. By the way, on Saturday nights in our eight story hotel on the roof, we're going to be blasting hip-hop uh all day until midnight

so if you're on the eighth floor it's going to be right above you and if you had any you know sort of idea that maybe you get a full night's sleep in before you get up to go to the fucking airport in the morning that's not going to happen but uh here are the room selections and we have a nice restaurant it should it should just say that. By the way, our hotel turns into a shitty fucking club on weekend nights. So if you're looking for sleep, we're more concerned with selling drinks. Okay? Do we understand each other?

I don't know why. The reason they don't fucking do it, the reason they don't say that, is because they'd lose business from goddamn adults. mean i wasn't that upset about it you know 12 o'clock is not a horrendous time to go to bed and i was you know reading i've been deeply immersed in a book preparing for a guest i haven't really i love when i get locked into a book and i was just totally surprised by this book it's harvey firestein's memoir. I think it's called I Was Better Last Night. I knew nothing about him. I'm not a big theater person, but what a life. And New York at that time, it's just great. Tells a good story. He's a good writer.

He'll be on the show. I'll say that again later because I'm going to talk to him. But that whole nightclub element, because you can lock in. There's nothing you can do. There's nothing you can do to sleep. There's nothing you can do to stop it. It's not like someone in the room next door. That happens too.

That's the problem. No matter how nice the fucking hotel, if somebody's paying for the room, you could get fucked. If they decide to put you next to the elevator because that's the last room they got, you could get fucked. It's hard for me not to feel like I'm some sort of mark and I've been set up. But I handled it well, like a fucking adult.

I'm like, oh, OK. Didn't realize this was a fucking nightclub hotel. I'll suck it up for another hour or two. But they should tell you, you know? So yeah. So the hotel was what it was. And I stayed an extra day because my brother came up from Florida to see the show with his girlfriend, his partner. So, you know, I got to spend time with family, but the show, all right, granted, I had a quadruple shot macchiato like within hours before the show. And I don't think it kicked in until like five minutes when I got on stage.

And I kind of went into sort of a hyper kind of a paralysis as I do to caffeinated. But too many people were coming in, you know, 15 minutes. We held the show 15 minutes and there were still like so many people coming in. And I guess that's why the opener takes a hit. I it but i just felt personally and no one needs to know this i thought it was a good show i'm glad people came out i thought it was a real show but i think that's my problem is i can't fucking fake it so if i'm experiencing some sort of discomfort while i'm on stage or that you know i'm not connecting the way I want to connect. I, I, I don't know that it reads, but it makes me a little, it makes me work

differently. And I don't want to just, I do not want to autopilot things. And I guess that's on me. I don't know if it's a, like, it's a discipline thing. I don't know. Maybe I set myself up. I don't know. It was a fine show. It was a long show. It was a full show and people had a nice time. I was happy to see everybody. I got back to the hotel and I just was sort of paralyzed. And I was like, you know, a couple of weeks ago in Laconia, New Hampshire, you were like, why am I not sad? Why am I not sad? And this is what I'm doing, laying on a bed at a Best Western Plus and sort of owning my life and thinking like, nothing wrong with this.

This is what I worked for. like drifting into the darkness, into that weird road depression, into that weird kind of place where it's sort of like, what's the point of any of this? Look out there. People have lives. What are you doing? Just in a hotel room. Nothing to do that night. Go down to the restaurant, eat by myself, read my Harvey Fierstein book about a guy that had this huge life. Either I don't appreciate the hugeness of my life and my accomplishments, or I need to figure out what the fuck to do to feel like I'm living my life. I'm hitting a wall, people. That's sort of what's happening. I'm sort of like coming to, in a way, my age, where I'm at in terms of performing,

what is it that I want to do, what makes me happy. And I've talked about this before. But I better figure it the fuck out. I guess I'm starting to realize that maybe I have not processed thoroughly or deeply the events of the last couple years. The ones that we all experienced together and the ones I experienced alone. I feel like I'm landing back in my same goddamn sad bag of skin and not much has changed other than for the worse. So I have tools. I have tools. I have a hammer.

I have a wrench. I have several screwdrivers. I can hit myself in the head, stick one in my leg, wake the fuck up and be grateful. That's what I need to do. There's nothing like being at the edge, the existential edge of the abyss of just sort of, you know, what is the point of it all? What am I doing? Am I doing my best?

all what am i doing am i doing my best you can't explain that weird kind of road hotel room depression it's not permanent and it's very specific and i don't think i'm the only one that's experienced it there is that i think it should probably be in the dM, the mental, you know, it has all the ailments, all the psychological disorders. And maybe there's one in there called hotel room effective disorder, because it definitely is a thing. Like, you know, sometimes you get to a hotel room and you're like, it doesn't matter what your life is or how long you're going to be there. All of a sudden, you're like in space and it's not great. The ship's not working great, and you're in space. The best characterization of hotel room affective disorder is Anomalisa, the animated Charlie Kaufman thing.

That is it. There's alcohol involved in that one. For me, it was just bags of cashews. There's alcohol involved in that one. For me, it was just, you know, bags of cashews. But to be in that room, you know, being hard on myself about my performance and alone, it was just, it's a familiar place. I do know it's going to go away. And I just, you know, you just kind of want to, you just want to go to sleep and what really amplifies hotel room effective disorder is when you're staying in a

hotel that turns into a fucking nightclub on saturday night and you're on the eighth floor and the party is happening right above your head you're sitting there in bed thinking like maybe it's time to stop i don't know man last week why do I feel they everyone enjoyed it maybe I can't what in them I don't know what the music was several different ones it was shaking the room shaking the room maybe that was buoying my hotel affective disorder. Maybe it was making it worse. I will have to reflect on that. But I heard glasses clinking, people laughing, and then that bass and the songs, I heard a whole song. It was literally the ceiling of my room and

the window. And maybe it's like like I just don't understand life. Why am I not on that fucking roof? Why am I not on that roof jumping off? Because there's a party going on, man. Come on. So Adam Ray, his podcast is called About Last Night. And you can get that wherever you get podcasts. He's on tour right now. so Adam Ray, his podcast is called About Last Night, and you can get that wherever you get podcasts,

he's on tour right now, you can go to adamraycomedy.com for his tour dates, he does stand up with me over at the comedy store all the time, he's acting a lot, he was on Pam and Tommy, and he's also in Young Rock, and it was time, it was time to talk to adam ray and this is me do you can get anything you need with uber eats well almost almost anything so no you can't get an ice

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When I die here, you'll never leave Japan alive. FX's Shogun. A new original series streaming February 27th exclusively on Disney+. 18 plus subscription required. T's and C's apply. Bring it. Well, you got pretty much all the stuff a kid would have in his fanny pack if he was going to run away from home. Yeah. A hammer, dice.

Pocket knife. What is it? Exacto knife? No, that's a regular pocket knife. Right. Yeah, and the dice. Yeah, of course. Any kid needs dice.

Every kid needs dice because you never know when you're going to come across some sort of... Gambling ring? Some sort of crap game? You don't want to be the because the pit master i mean i had a kid in elementary school one of my friends who had a candy club he would charge for he would the candy his mom would buy he would then charge you five bucks a month to eat the candy from his house and uh i'll say his name if that's what you're gonna ask well i mean i don't want to is there a statute of limitations on this information is the kid did he did he grow up to do some other

shady shady grifting i mean as shady as you can be he ended up uh marrying my high school girlfriend so i guess he knows who he is so were you one of the suckers who uh who paid him uh oh yeah candy was i was a classic kid, so I think if there was candy in a house Classic fat kid? Yeah. Like old school fat kid? There are layers and levels. Not only to the degrees in which you will go

for snacks, but today's fat kids I think are worse off. Why is that? Because they have more things to keep them inside and more access i was an active fat kid that's why i'm an active stoner you're an active fat kid and now you're an active stoner but wait that down there's a title for this episode well i think that's the title for your cd are you gonna put one out people still making cds i'd love cds but maybe i listen to

you got to do it on something put it on your put on your youtube thing whatever the fuck you do when i first was getting into stand-up and i would drive to see my dad in Laughlin, Nevada when he moved out there and was a doctor. Laughlin? At the VA clinic, yeah. Okay. Edgewater Casino, you ever perform there? No, but I know where it is.

I know you drive through it, I think, going across, don't you? Laughlin? Mostly you drive through it. Yeah. If you're driving to stop, it's not bad. It's a big Indian reservation. There's a few casinos yeah my dad lived out there while he was working at the va clinic and uh and he would just he worked something out

with the avi casino where he would just live in the casino so he's a degenerate gamble your father i wish i mean great with money you know debatable i always it's the only time you can use the word degenerate i know it's weird it's not a word, but it just always goes before gambler. Now, let me ask. The other stuff is just assume you're degenerate. But with gambling, it's like if you gamble, you're a degenerate gambler. Now, let me ask you this. Yeah, what?

Would you rather be called a degenerate or a bummer? Degenerate. Okay. I mean, degenerate was sort of a flag of honor or whatever you call it. A badge of honor. Yeah. Back in the day a badge of honor. Yeah. Back in the day. In your day.

Yeah. Well, yeah, I mean, I guess so. I just wrote a forward for an introduction for a book of underground comics. And underground comics were degenerate, but it was in a good way. In a good way. Yeah, degenerate was a label put on people

who were having a good time. There were positive connotations towards it. Yeah. Yeah. Degenerate was a lazier or more, I i guess artsy way of saying you're uh you like to have fun you like to like to have a fun party animal without saying or you just don't fit in you're you know you're an outsider you're a barnacle on on society an outsider a jew a jew i knew we were building to that degenerate jew so so you wait so the fat kid stoner thing. Here's why there's a difference.

My nephew, now who's seven, is super active. And he's a stoner? Who's seven? What are you doing? I can't wait. I can't wait, honestly, to smoke pot with this kid. Is that weird? Yeah.

I look at him now. A little. I don't know. He's just such a goofball. But he's real active, but he snacks like crazy. I was that way. But I didn't have as many game apparatuses. Or YouTube.

Indoor game. I'm just saying there's more. Video game. Gaming. Yes. More opportunities for them to all stay locked inside and go outside. Yeah, I don't even know if they have a social life. Do they?

Man, the outside, I mean, in person and in person social life. My nephew at seven, my nieces at 12 are on TikTok. God bless them. So it's like they they're and they're active at school but they're not doing what my nephew does at seven which is meeting kids in the cul-de-sac yeah and causing uh running amok going into the woods yeah to find trouble you know that's what we used to do go find the porn magazines in the woods oh yeah yeah who was the kid that had them in your neighborhood well someone's older brother you probably had one or two and then and then one would just appear somewhere and you'd be like oh i used to do a bit about it you go back to the same place where you found the one page you know maybe maybe the rest of the magazine showed up you never knew how they got there

yeah yeah one was going around i remember the first time real filth you know not playboy filth but real filth like porn filth where with that hyper glossy pages wow and just like jizz and cocks and pussies and it was like on every page huh yeah it must be like eighth or ninth grade it was just like what the fuck yeah what did you see first and what threw you into a just talking about that in this thing i'm writing and someone's forward yeah because underground because it's underground comics, about underground comics. Oh, gotcha. In my experience, my first experience, when I was like 12 years old,

at a B. Dalton bookseller at the Wenrock Mall. That's a shutout. In Albuquerque, New Mexico, that I'd taken the bus there to hang out at the mall. I just went to the bookstore to look at the comedy section, the humor section, and there was this book called The History of Underground Comics,

and they didn't know what was in there, what was in there, and it was just like fucking, it was all the art crumb stuff just dicks and cops and you know pirates and heads being cut off all the underground comics it was the history of underground comics and i swear to god i jerked off in the aisle right there in the bookstore wow yeah but i didn't take it out but i just over my pants yeah you was 12 just a no hands it up probably no hands but i try i've tried to do that i try to do that every once in a while when I was a kid, but I don't think I ever pulled off a no hander.

It is funny when those books- Did you try to pull off a, did you pull off a no hander? You know, come on, it's hard. I remember I was on a trip with my parents in the station wagon, just in the back, trying to- In a station wagon too. Trying to come without touching my dick. Station wagon, the back of the station wagon is a great place to come by yourself when

no one's watching. Who said that? Mark Maron and Adam Ray today. I never did, though. I tried. You can't. You can't. It's impossible.

Your mom knows when you're jerking off. Oh, yeah. You know what I mean? It's like- Ever get caught? I don't think so. They used to stick their head in to say goodnight and stuff, but maybe the mounds of sticky Kleenex stuck in the edge beside my bed

like where do you think who who finds that yeah i don't know yeah and see what this is the one of the benefits of having a uh a single mom is i didn't have double dose of check-ins of nightly check-ins oh yeah like was the dad one coming yeah and also i think i mean you tell me i mean i didn't i don't know if the dad if that's the role of like, hey, are you jerking off? Is there a conversation that goes down? Because my mom didn't have it with me. She did buy me condoms way too early. Yeah.

I don't know. I knew about it. I don't think I ever got to talk. Yeah. But I definitely, there was- Well, you didn't need it. You were looking at jizz and titty and cock pages. Well, yeah, and there was-

The Bernstein Bears, tell the truth. You know, 14, 15 years old. I mean, there was porno tapes around that I got hold of. Was there somebody's cool dad that kind of sat everyone down and was like... No, no, no. We just were, we had to fend for ourselves,

but it was the 70s, so, you know, it was... Becoming cool. I guess, but it was around, you know, filth was around, and my parents were not very disciplinary, but, like, you imagine the kids today with all the my parents were not very disciplinary but like you imagine the kids today with all the porn well you think someone's got to give you a conversation what to do it's uh yeah i don't think so i well porn i think it's just ruining

so much for yeah it's ruined me broke my it broke everything broke my brain you know so funny i uh this pam and tommy show that i got to be on is now making people, I get all these messages from people that tell me I've gone back to find the tape. Isn't that crazy? Oh, you played Jay Leno in this? Yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And the Pam and Tommy sex tape that was like responsible more or less for- Isn't that good?

It was okay. I mean, I'm not here to dissect the ins and outs of it. It was fine. The ins and outs of it? Have you seen it? The ins and outs of it? That's all there is to dissect i mean yeah if you want to talk like aesthetics yeah like and and how it was but it was only because it was the first of its kind what a celebrity fuck tape yes well haven't been that

many have there publicly since paris hilton and what else kim kardashian kind of launched the true movement who gives a fuck about that guess what yeah who cares but guess what before Pam and Tommy I guarantee you there was probably

another thousand couples making tapes that have never seen the light of day so who are these couples celebrities or just

regular people what do you mean probably more regular people who are they don't you have you porn put it in

but I'm saying like the celebs that didn't that didn't ever let their tapes get stolen from to put it in but I'm saying like the celebs that didn't oh the celebs that didn't ever let their tapes get stolen from a disgruntled worker I guess

I mean I recorded myself fucking once when I was in college where's that tape with Betamax it's around it's around it's nothing great

you didn't destroy I mean what you know what I mean what is it really isn't that such a fucking move to like but I mean but it wasn't done well

it was just I just set up a camera on a tripod to see what it looked like. You know what? On a tripod. It looks like porn. Mark, you went as far to set up on a tripod. Well, I told my girlfriend. What do you think?

I was going to hide it? I'm like, let's try this. Let's see what it looks like. But you didn't just set it up on the edge of the desk? You got a tripod? I had a tripod. That's the filmmaker in you. That's right.

So? I really respect that, actually. There's a big old clunky camera that I stole from my dad. You you. That's right. So? I really respect that, actually. There's a big old clunky camera that I stole from my dad. You wanted to do it right. So wait, you grew up in where? Seattle? Seattle, Lake Forest Park, Washington. You're a Jew?

I'm a Jew, baby. A Jew, but you're like East Coast style Jew. What, do your parents from the East Coast? My mom is from Ada, Oklahoma. No, no, no, no. Yeah, and my dad is from Walla Walla, Washington. What the fuck? And you turned out a New York Jew? you gave birth to a new york i guess yeah i don't know i don't know where

i wait he's some of the oklahoma jews oh tons of oklahoman jews i know tim blake nelson tim tim blake nelson the actor is oklahoma jew wow and the reason he told me was that there was a time maybe after world war ii i think or maybe before okay where the idea was uh people the immigrants there was a organization that would you know assign them a state to spread everybody out so they wouldn't all be in one place when they come to kill us again i love that but i believe i think it's true wow like there was an agency a jewish agency that referred people to certain you know know, states or communities. They just, the idea was like, we got to spread out this time.

Right. We can't, it can't be in too, we can't all be in Poland. Yeah. We can't all be in. Yeah. Mix it up. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. There's tons in Seattle. Not tons, but are there, but they're like. Yeah. But, but are like, what kind of Jews are they? Like San Francisco Jews? They're not really Jews. Like these German aristocratic Jews who don't do, try to blend that you tell me there's a real Jewish community oh yeah I mean

I went to Temple Beth Am uh was there conservative no real very reformed see that but you've got but you've got different but you've got levels in it just like you've got uh judging you but like was there a guitar there during the services we had a cantor we had a full choir of this I was bar mitzvahed I worked there all through high school. Let's back up a minute. Full choir. Yeah. What the fuck is that? You never had a choir singing Shema Yisrael? In synagogue? Yeah.

No, choirs are for churches. Yeah, I'm sorry, buddy. I'm sorry. That's real reform. Did you believe in Jesus, too? No. I mean, you know. It depends what sort of snacks you got. I'm not religious.

I was bar mitzvahed. Friday, Saturday, just one day. Who's doing a full weekend? Me. Friday was the Friday night service. Saturday you did the Haftorah. That's how it worked. Friday night was just a Shabbat service. Saturday morning, that meant business.

You were up there with the old guys doing the Haftorah on Saturday morning. I crushed that. Worked with a tutor for probably five seconds. Did you work with the choir? I wish. I wish. I was in musical theater. I would have hopped right up there. Let me just ask you.

Was there a progressive female rabbi who played guitar? We had a little rabbi who looked like- A little rabbi. His name was Rabbi Hirsch. He almost looked and sounded like John Lovitz's character in The Critic. Remember that cartoon? Yeah.

He was a little weeble of a Jewish man, but had big presence. And he was the last. He did my bar mitzvah and then retired. You put him over the top. Yeah. He said, it's not going to get better than this. Or worse. Or worse. I butchered the via haft last. He did my bar mitzvah and then retired. You put him over the top. Yeah, he said it's not going to get better than this. Or worse. Or worse. I butchered the via hafta.

You did? I got through it. I was pretty nervous. I thought you just said he nailed it. Like moments ago. I crushed. Well, give me another one. You crushed a hafta?

Not the hafta. The via hafta. The via hafta. Yeah, hafta. I don't know. Yeah, yeah, yeah. My Torah portion I crushed. And then I had to.

That's what I mean. That leads into the Torah portion, doesn't it? Look, it's all a blur at this point. I was on a lot of pills. Yeah, then you go on the half Torah. All my mom's friends at Temple Beth-Om are going to love that part. It's the best. So you have siblings? I do.

I've got a sister. I've got two half-brothers. uh two uh half brothers uh from where two stepbrothers from your dad so folks split when i was what seven eight uh dad are you the oldest uh no sister's two years older okay so it's you two with the so it was us four mom dad sister growing up folks split seven eight uh sister uh and mom and i went to live together dad and new wife uh went with her kid and then had two kids okay and then mom remarried about 10 years later and uh brought in my stepdad george was crushing it with his two kids right so step brother and step sister from that family and then um all jews uh no my stepdad converted and that's how he met my mom huh yeah

okay classic pixar story yeah um he converted to oh really did she want that's how he met my mom. Huh. Yeah. Okay. Classic Pixar story. Yeah. He converted to, oh really? Did she want that? Yeah. And he was in the choir, I think. Of course. Of course, the choir.

She actually didn't want it. She told me that when they went out that she wasn't all that impressed, but Shania Twain style. But then he courted her and they, mean they're you know i just got back from arizona with them took them to arizona to go to spring training um uh before baseball gets going and and they're uh they're peas in a pod they just celebrate uh celebrated 20 years um your mom and stepdad yeah i mean they should have met you know years earlier but um but that's just how it goes all right so so you're a kid, a Jewish kid in Seattle. Yeah.

But I grew up in Lake Forest Park, which is about 25 minutes north of the city. Shoreline, I guess, if you really know the area. Yeah. I went to Shorecrest High School. In the 90s. In the 90s. So this is when Seattle's becoming rich. Starting to become the metropolis it is now.

Yeah. Starbucks was not yet a thing. It still had a very blue collar vibe. It was kind of- Sure. You know, brushed to the side. And then the, I mean, it was the grunge the sports the um 90s that's right it was just coming up i'd say when i was like sixth seventh grade right uh so i was just you know and my um eating you were eating i was eating my feelings for sure dude i was just listening to can you feel the love tonight by elton john

what was so like So like how fat? Let's just say that when I went on a diet in sixth grade, because my grandpa very passively was like, you know, you can't wear sweatpants at your bar mitzvah, which is the name of a Judy Blume book. Should be. Should be. So says that to me very passively.

Your memoir. You got to think in terms of yourself. You're right. I'm like mid-bite and he says that. And I'm just like, it's just like a classic drop the fork or actually finish the bite. Is this your grandpa? Grandpa. Your mom's dad.

Mom's dad. Sweetheart of a gentleman. But he fucking was like, hey man, like you gotta, you know, you gotta stop. You gotta just stop.

You gotta get it together. You're about to enter seventh grade. Seventh grade. This is where girls come into play hopefully. You know, you are.

But I just really, I was, again, I was an active fat kid. So it was just about stopping the eating. But I mean, like when I started to try to go on a diet, the teachers, that's how I know it was like a big deal because I remember at the sixth grade party, they had all the snacks because everyone else had crazy metabolisms. So there's like, you know, from pizzas to pies and cookies. And I'm going for veggies in front of some moms that are chaperoning and some of the teachers yeah and one of the teachers has the audacity to go hey ray she goes whoa she goes carrots she goes so

there's pizza right there ray yeah there's pizza right there hey you fat another great title how could what for your memoir she just literally points at it almost like gawking at me like, are you sure you don't want this delicious sweaty meat pie? And you're fat. Yeah, and I was like, I didn't have the chutzpah and the social

awareness to fire back at her and be like, maybe you should join me on this carrot escapade, Mrs. Greenland. Oh yeah, chubby. Chubby. If I wish I were in hindsight, but I just kind of should join me on this carrot escapade yeah mrs greenland you know oh yeah um chubby chubby you know i if i wish i were in hindsight but i just kind of cowered and was like oh no carrots actually take carrots you know some sort of you did the fat kid thing yeah the carrots actually taste good it's actually better you know they're actually better for you but i don't know i just i just

i love carrots you know just something that didn't you're just trying not to eat pizza yeah it's all you're taking took everything you got. A fat kid going on a diet spreads like wildfire. What do you mean it spreads like wildfire? Well, people are just like, can't believe, because you're the fat kid. But were you sent to a therapist? No, just, I mean, that statement from my grandpa. That was it?

Carried a lot of weight. And what about your sister? How'd she turn out? The older sister? Great now, she went away to a girl's school, because she was kind of just hanging out with the- Wrong crowd? Yeah, the kids that would like- There was a kid named, I think, Jason Potts.

He would smoke cigarettes in our house and tell me my mom had big tits. Just those types of kids. That guy? Yeah, that guy. Where'd he end up? Dude. You don't know? Hopefully, listen to this podcast.

Jason Potts. Hopefully, run him for Senate. Smoking cigarettes in Adam Ray's house. Talking about his mom. Is that me? Is that my phone? I think so. Oh, shit. Is that Jason Potts? Hopefully running for Senate. Smoking cigarettes in Adam Ray's house. Talking about his mom. Is that me? Is that my phone? I think so. Oh, shit. Is that Jason Potts? Please tell me you got him on the line. What the fuck is that number? It's like, yo, Ray Ray.

How's Mama Ray? Yeah, so I... I have her tits holding up. So, sister goes to a girl's school. It's just mom and I from eighth grade and through high school. So we become best friends and enemies. It's like, I'm going through that time where I'm becoming a man, so it's I mean, i from eighth grade and through high school so we become best friends and enemies it's like i'm going through a time where it's i'm becoming a man so it's i mean you know more or less at 16 17 18 where i'm like give me some space but like can you wash my basketball jersey for the game tonight you're such a jock yeah i was a jock that

did musical theater you know quit football to play danny zucco in greece you did and then that started football yeah so wait what year is that sophomore year in high school you're were you good at football? Yeah, basketball and football were my sports. See, you're a sports Jew. That's the primary difference between us. Yeah. See, I know who Hank Greenberg is.

Right. I know. You do, because he's a Jew. Right. Sandy Koufax is the other one. Great. But that's it. That's all we got.

See, you know that stuff, and I know everything else. Yeah. Baruch atah. That's all we got. So you know that stuff, and I know everything else. Yeah. Baruch atah. That's right. There is something about the Jew that plays sports that is also almost like the fat kid going on a diet. It's like people, that didn't come up a lot, but I remember one of my friend's dads once making a comment to me about losing the weight and how I would rummage through his cupboards and how he didn't have to like how he was going to save money on snacks basically right which i

appreciate that he was making the joke i'd got you know i was in a better place yeah but then he also might not bully the kid but then he did he did make a weird comment one time about me being a jew and being good at basketball uh-huh and i just it was my first taste of like wow you truly are a product of your environment. Like, I guess if he doesn't- Mild anti-Semitism? Yeah. Well, it was, you know, Eastern Washington again.

And, but yeah, basketball was the main sport. Football, I was good at. I was going to start varsity my sophomore year. But you're a sports fan. Oh, huge. Well, what's that? Your dad did that? Dad played sports, but mom was a tennis doubles champ and ate Oklahoma.

Oh, yeah? But probably both of them, but also just my friends. Sports was a thing. I didn't grow up with it at all. Again, Seattle in the 90s had this movement of baseball and basketball that really got me into it. And then I think it was truly, and how I became a funny kid was when the fat kid thing was going on, it was like, all right, start to make people laugh, and now you're looked at as the funny kid and not the fat kid. Right.

And so the more I could do that. So honestly, I liked sports, but I think I made a point to be more active in that stuff. Sure. Because it was like more rooms to play in a way. Does that make sense? How fat were you, dude? I think, I remember looking down at the scale in fifth grade, and I think it was 170 or 175. Uh-huh.

That's big. Uh-huh. Yeah. If the viewers could see Mark's face, he's looking at me like I'm a pint of ice cream. 175 is a good weight. 175 is a good weight. As a grown-up.

If you're 39. I'm 58, but yeah. Look at you, dude, crushing the game. Noxzema? No, it's Cetaphil lotion. I don't know what that is. It's a facial lotion. You don't put lotion on your face?

I don't. See, a little sunscreen. When's that going to happen? I'm just a little sunscreen. I guess so. Yeah. You're doing all right. Yeah.

You got to take care of your skin. I know you do. All right. I don't want to- What? I don't want to be- I don't know. You see, though, some of these older, grizzled, chiseled character actors, and you're like,

that seems like a cool life. Well, maybe that's what you're headed for. Yeah. Because you're doing those parts. I'll be the Jewish Gary Oldman. I am doing those parts. I haven't played any. I mean.

You're not a leading man. There's that guy. The day is over. There's that guy. Oh, my God. I just saw the next 30 years of my hopeful career. There's that guy. Who is that God. I just saw the next 30 years of my hopeful career. There's that guy. Who is that guy that's always in the things?

You know what, though? I'll take it. At least you're that. Sure. But wait. So because when I thought I was fat, no one was calling me fat. I just thought it, except my mother. There were nicknames.

Jello Jiggler. No, come on. Penis and Tits Kid. Come on. That one I made up. But the first one for real. Just fatty, chub. Penis and tits kid?

I just wanted to get you to laugh. Yeah, right. Kids don't know how cruel they're being at that age. Yeah, they do. You know it more than anything. But you don't know the impacts days later. You have no conscience about it. Yeah.

The only difference is you know when you're older because you know you're doing a bad thing and you feel bad about when you're a kid you're like who gives a fuck who gives a what up what's up fatty yeah where you going fatty yeah and in a way i almost thank some of those kids for throwing so much shade because it did break me down yeah where you get forced to look at yourself home and cry and eat oh yeah a lot saved by the Bell was my best friend, the Disney afternoon, and snacks. Really? The candy we would buy for baseball to sell to get- Oh, yeah.

I remember one day I went out- The chocolate bars? The chocolate bars. I remember one day I went out in the neighborhood to sell them, and a dog, classic, like out of the sandlot, a dog got off his leash. One of these wild boar fucking woolly mammoth pit bull machines just chased me. Yeah. Down the hill, I dropped all the candy and sprinted as fast as I've ever ran.

Got up, tripped onto the front lawn, lost a shoe and crawled into our front door. Went back, picked up all the candy, didn't continue selling, went home and ate it. Good, good. Well, you know, I guess there's some justice to that story. If that dog ate any of those it would have killed it yeah i saved the dog thank you for picking up the message i guess so but i i ate all that stuff because i go i uh yeah eating the feelings is a real thing but then you just get to a point where you go all right i gotta flip it around too much tea when my friends that i were

making laugh that i thought my friends got to uh got in the game of the uh poking fun then that's when it was like all right i, I got to make a switch. But then I was funny kid. Funny kid and sports kid? Yes. And in both. I was being funny with the theater kids and funny with the sports kids

and just kind of in both worlds. So you were a theater jock, but when it came down to choose, you went with the theater. Yeah. Well, that's good. That's evolved. Well, yeah, because I mean, hey, man, Danny Zuko, Greece, sophomore year of high school.

Getting a lot more attention than what position were you playing? Offensive line. Yeah. Yeah. Also, how many 6'1 offensive line Jews have you ever heard of in the NFL? And also, how long is that going to last? You weren't going to the NFL. Bro.

Yeah. You sound like my mom. She was very, yeah, she was like, I mean, she told me though, because I had to quit. My coach was a stereotypical football coach, like out of Friday Night Lights, what have you. And I had to walk down the long hallway to his office and tell him I'm not going to play football this year. After he told me I'm starting varsity as a sophomore.

I'm a song and dance man, coach. Mark, I tried to make a joke out of it. I go, I can't memorize the playbook this year because I got to memorize the lyrics to Grease Lightning. He paused, took a beat, said, get the fuck out of my office. No. Then he brought his kids to the Sunday matinee where I'm in full leather jacket and makeup and just goes, you weren't bad. Oh, good. Yeah.

How do you like that? Yeah. You made the right choice. And we've since reconnected and he's like, you know, now he came out and saw me and I was in Hawaii with Adam Devine. And he goes, I guess it worked out. And he was like a different now he came out and saw me and i was in hawaii with adam divine and and he goes uh he goes oh i guess it worked out and he was like a different person yeah it's so funny like time goes by you're like wow you is this guy and then we got to talking and and he came on my podcast and we got on the podcast he came on my podcast about last night which you bet on when your car got towed and uh did that remember that every every time i turn on laurel

which is all I- You think of it. Yeah, because I'm like, what was I thinking? You parked in the space. It still baffles me to this day. I parked in front of a driveway to a fucking apartment building. Yeah, dude. That should have been the moment that you were put into a home.

Yeah. I mean, it's amazing you're still here. What time was it? Early or something? I'm up early. I don't know how it happened. It was not even time for the five o'clock news, dude. I know.

It was still daylight. No, I don't even know what the fuck happened. I thought it was during the day. Yeah. I cannot figure it out still. I think the excitement of being on the podcast was just- Yeah, that was it. Yeah, it was probably me going, where the fuck is this?

All right, I got to- I'm doing the guy who's on that thing. I looked, there's a thing right across the street. That was cool, though. People don't know this. That was a very big deal because when I met you at the Just for Laughs Festival through our mutual friend, Ryan Singer, and then you popped around to do other spots in Montreal. Yeah.

And I remember your manager was going to bail. So you looked at me and were like, you want to bounce around in these spots with me? And I was like, yeah. And then we walked around. And Montreal, it was out of a Tom Hanks, Meg Ryan movie. We just walked around, talk shop. You treated me like you'd known me for 20 years. I think I brought up my podcast prematurely.

And then at the end, like a fucking amateur. But not too early, like eight minutes into the chat yeah after i made we had a couple i'd said something goofy and you thought it wasn't terrible and then we kept walking the streets but it's like we're walking through beautiful montreal nice you're doing your spots also you were crushing in your spots had one of the sets not gone well i don't think we'd be here right now no you you would have been you know i would have been like, I gotta go. Yeah, dude, you wouldn't have finished. So then we get back to the big Just for Laughs bar where everyone hangs out.

Right. And we walk back and it was like a fun thing. And you looked at me and you go, well, that was a good time. And you go, I'll do your podcast. Like, bug me when we get back. And I was like, wow. I was like, this is what this festival is about. That's right.

It's booking Mark Maron on my podcast so he gets his car towed. How long before i went on and then we got back and i think and i've told this story just to a handful of buddies i think maybe two weeks later i see at the store and i go mark and you go hey and i was like okay i go right back to it right back as if montreal was just a fart in the wind it was a night dream that never happened. Didn't want to walk around alone. That's all it was to you. I respect that, though. Look at this large Jewish guy. Pretty funny.

Seems excited. Yeah, exactly. If that's one thing I am excited about. How long did it take me to do the podcast? A year? Three years. No, dude, you know what? It was the right time. Things happen.

Everything happens in this world for a reason doesn't it though sure and I got punished for icing you my car got towed yeah I didn't look at it like that

but for sure that was karma it was podcast karma but you know what it was it was like I think I mentioned a few things here and there and then you know

that's one thing as you know I mean I don't know how long it took you to book Clooney and Obama. Like, are you just shooting them text messages? All the time. The follow-up.

George won't leave me alone. What are you talking about? That's who it's called. Yeah. You know, there's a balance between, like, when you're trying to get somebody on, right, to being proactive and being a little bit of a nudnik, right? Nudnik. Good one.

Yeah. I don't know if it's the right definition of nudnik, but I like it. Nudge. That's like a nudge. Nudge. Yeah. And so, with that, with you, it was trying to find that balance. And then I remember I saw you.

And then also we started to become chummier at the store. Right. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then once that started to happen, I go, oh, that was a necessary element. I think I just started to watch you. And I'm like, oh, this guy's fucking hammering this shit. He's doing the job. Okay, cool.

So I'm like, oh, he knows how to do this. So at some point in the interim there, I'm like, no, he's like doing the job okay so like you know i'm like yeah he knows how to do this so at some point in in the interim there i'm like no he's a real comic this guy's that hey by the way that's how it should be i would i mean you know there has to be that respect you're going up in those early spots just like wow just like trying to get the there you go now you're an audience fuck you did you ever do those early spots yeah somewhere yeah not there yeah i don't think so i mean i was in belly room act when i was a doorman there i mean i know what it's like to perform for no one there yeah when i was a kid but yeah i've done my share of uh of cold opening yeah does the store not there necessarily do you still do you yearn for those days when i mean even

when i remember i started there i think in 2012 or 2011 yeah and it was you know a tuesday was not what a tuesday is now right right do you yearn for those days or do you 10 people days yes i only yearn for because there was a time where i was terrified of the original room and when there was less stakes where you just like go up for 15 scattered people like who gives a fuck yeah this isn't scary right it's not going to be on me who can determine whether anyone does well with this shit yeah so you just had more freedom but at some point the fear went away like i literally remember being terrified to go up there because you couldn't see the audience that was a big obstacle for me

and like i remember when i was trying to get the hang of that place and i still had ghosts from when i was a doorman there just getting up there not really having a bearing in terms of what the audience looks like it was a kind of a heavy for me yeah but now it's like i live there like both rooms i don't give a shit you know what are they gonna do tell me i can't work there anymore yeah i mean that was ultimately actually just got a text saying yeah you're banned from the store why can't i get any of these noises to stop ever? Got a text from Jason Potts. It's Tommy. It's Tommy.

Tommy was telling me I can't do any more spots. Do you need to see people in at least the first few rows in any venue? No, it's better if I don't. But it's helpful if I do. It depends because- That's surprising to me because you feel- I connect. Yeah, I have to. It's better if I don't only because I'm going to end up looking at one guy. It's a lot That's surprising to me because you feel- I connect. Yeah, I have to.

It's better if I don't only because I'm going to end up looking at one guy. It's a lot of weight for the one guy. Yeah, it is. Walking on one guy, the whole fucking show. I can't look out. Right. But I did learn that in the original room a little bit. But the point being that until I got the hang of that place, it was always just terrifying.

Yeah. I think there is something about tackling that fear of the store because everyone has it. That's what's great about it. There's, I don't think anyone has ever performed there without some window of where you are.

So much of it has to do with comfort though in terms of like, you know, initially you're afraid because you think like you're always auditioning. Yeah.

But like, that's over for me. That's over, yeah. And I imagine for you as well. Yeah. So, you know then it's just up to you like the the original room who cares the main room for some reason can really go south on you yeah and you don't even know why yeah you know you're up there it's like a full house

you're like what is there something wrong with my did my fly open what the fuck is happening am i you know like you don't after those first couple of jokes you're like oh this is gonna be a slog and i'm not to be able to get out. When I have seen you just slay in the main room, sitting on the stool. Yeah. It's like, because, you know, I think I've sat on a stool a few times and really dug it. And the first stand-up I feel like I truly live absorbed was Patrice O'Neal at the Punchline in San Francisco. Yeah.

And it was just mind-boggling. And so people that do that, that command, and I don't nervously pace anymore like I did when I first started, but I got some energy. You're moving around. Yeah. You're slugging it out. Yeah. So to watch you just so, I don't know if poised is the right word,

but just still and comfy like that is, I don't know if it's that I want to be able to do it or I just admire it. It's like for me, guitar, right? Sure. I took a few lessons in college. I can play enough chords to write a goofy song for a friend's wedding. Yeah.

But I'm not trying to master it because I look at people that do. Even yourself at the goddamn Comedy Jam, you go, oh, see, that's, I don't want to do it because look at people who actually try and give a fuck. I don't think I'm doing it. You know, I'm good at it, but I don't. But anyways, it's great. So you can play a few chords and you don't close with it? I did it.

So my second. You didn't close it. No, my second show at the store when I was doing the Bringer shows, doing the Vargas and Kathy Lewis shows. And I closed with, yeah, what I had, six minutes. And the last three were a song. And I remember going okay. And then somebody said to me, you're either the guitar comic or you're not.

And so I was like, okay. And you look around like, how many are there anymore? Yeah. And why aren't there any? Yes. Because it's not good. Yeah. And then Mitzi, and I showcased for Mitzi.

And I didn't do it, but I was wearing a backwards hat. And she just goes, why are you wearing a hat? And I was like, that's your feedback? Yeah. She told me I needed to wear a scarf. You had to take something off. I had to put something on. Are you serious?

Yeah, Paul went, you should wear a scarf. That's kind of a compliment, right? I guess. I don't know. Who the fuck knows what she was thinking? All I know is that whatever she said, we'd all do it. Okay, I'll take the hat off. Of course.

Took it off right there. Threw it away in front of her. Threw it away, yeah. But wait. So, oh, the sitting down thing. You know where that evolved out of? Where? I used to do it when I was bombing because I would just lean into bombing.

If I wasn't having a good set, I'd fucking sit down and go on longer. But also, I always thought the guys that sat down, like the old school guys, even Cosby on himself, and Shelly Berman, or any of those old guys, this idea that stand-ups didn't sit down is ridiculous. They were always sitting down.

And people who say this are like, shut the fuck up. Look at these idiots. Look at Marin and his stool. What do you say this are like, shut the fuck up. Look at these idiots. Look at Marin and his stool. What do you think this stool's up there for? Yeah. It's always up there. Not to hold your water.

You think it's just for your dumb bottled water? No. Being there since the 50s? Fucking idiot. Talking to nobody. Making up the person to yell at. Did you ever rehearse your bits in the mirror? When you first started.

You did. I did. Of. I did. Of course I did. No, I didn't do it. Never did it. Just got on stage immediately with your thoughts and just said, I'm going to see what happens. Yes. My thoughts and maybe like very early on when I did an open mic or two in college, a couple

Woody Allen jokes. Wow. Yeah. That's trust. You've always had that in yourself i feel like it's not trust i was terrified i used to spend like days when i had to do when i was doing open mics for a fucking week i was out of my mind with my piece of paper man it's just me and a piece of paper going oh fuck uh but no i never i i didn't i didn't have no sense yeah i guess that's the

actor in me i would rehearse them for my alcoholic roommate yeah but i didn't know i didn't have no sense. Yeah. I guess that's the actor in me. I would rehearse them for my alcoholic roommate. Yeah, but I didn't always know what they were. I mean, I remember once in college, I did what I was going to do at an open mic, you know, for friends, and it was the worst. The worst. I can't look at myself when I see myself on television.

What do I want in a mirror? What are you making, mugging and shit to yourself? Yeah, I mean, it was just, I guess it was just to try to calm the nerves oh but what's the gap though

so you're doing Grease in high school yeah sophomore year and then that play just ignites the love for for performing hearing the people

I loved it also the it was yeah it was a mix of of the again the the adulation but really the the fun of it.

Like, it all goes back to that. Like, all of this, this right here with you, doing shows this weekend. I'm going to fucking Batavia, Illinois, the Vegas of the Midwest. You know what I'm saying? It's like, it's all fun still. So that's where the collaborative efforts for the play was like that that time at shore crest high school and the the the group we kind of had that did five or six shows together yeah is so um you know uh influential in just what i'm doing now formative yeah formative for sure

and it's a roll the dice i've seen the program a few years since and a few years prior when i was there high school yeah and it's such a luck of the draw of the classes you come up with and just like in comedy force right the people that we come up with and get to be around and share stories and stages and sure and uh the grind with it's uh it's so you know even my friend group in school it's like my mom when my folks but wanted to move to oklahoma to be her folks were like well just come down here we'll help you get a job stay with us for a little bit save some cash my mom to her credit which is why she's you know my but wanted to move to Oklahoma to be her folks were like, well, just come down here. We'll help you get a job. Stay with us for a little bit.

Save some cash. My mom, to her credit, which is why she's my hero and just the greatest and did four jobs as a single mom to make sure I could sell candy bars and get chased by dogs and try to lose some weight from running down the hill. Yeah. Stand up for carrots. She goes, I'm not not gonna move because Adam's got his friends here which is huge

if I got to Oklahoma who the fuck knows where I'd be maybe I'd be running Bricktown Comedy Club I just gave them a shout out they never booked me maybe not

maybe you'd be riding a horse yeah maybe a whole different you'd be working on an oil rig who's to say but stayed there stayed on the track you'd probably have

more indigenous friends a thousand percent yeah it'd be a more diverse group for sure. But yeah, so then the performing bug just then led to everything. And then in high school, it was like my buddies and I ran the high school news show. They had seniors. The news show.

They had seniors our sophomore year, basically. They found out a way to broadcast into all the rooms a weekly show that was like news, weather, sports. and here's the clubs you can sign up for and there's a dance on friday get your thing in so you get a few jokes in well we took it over and turned it but it was five minutes every friday maybe even four by the time i graduated because we did sophomore junior and senior year it was a 22 minute sketch show that played the beginning of every class every friday yeah most teachers wouldn't even air it because they're like this is fucking 20 minutes of class yeah um but uh but again that helped kind of uh you know kickstart all of the uh the performing

and acting and then stand up i started doing i did two open mics at giggles in seattle did you ever play there of course i recorded two cds there i oh my god the um first place i did stand up and then it was jiggles for a little bit at the strip club. No, I know. And then, yeah, Terry. Fucking Terry. Terry Taylor. Ran everything. But yeah, you make that sound like a good thing.

It was the worst. No, no. Oh, sorry. Let me take two. Let me do it again. Ran everything? Yeah. Well, yeah.

He took you. He sold you your ticket. He made you your drink. He did five. He seated you. And then he do the five minutes. And he yelled at your mom when she said, hey, can you seat us? That guy was weird.

But for some reason, he was weird. Did he ever go to his apartment and he'd show you his collection of action figures? What? Yeah. Why did I say that with such a surprise tone? Because you assumed a blowjob on somebody's part was next. But no, the weirdest thing about his collection is that they were arranged like they were

at a store. They were in the containers on racks. Doesn't every action figure aficionado have them organized as if a store's going to come in and appraise them? Oh good, look, they're still in the package. He-Man and Raphael. You should just open a store here. But no, I like what

you're saying about the people that you hang out with. We don't think about that enough. Well, I mean, I do all the time because I knew who they were, who I was eating with in New York at two in the morning. It was me and Ross and CK and Natel, Silverman, Todd Berry. That's fucking crazy. Yeah. But how about pre-standup though?

Do you have those friends whether it's high school middle middle school yeah that you go wow these guys were uh i could bounce stuff off of but they were also funny in their own right enough i don't to help curate the skill set i wasn't as funny i was kind of a smart ass in high school right and junior high more but then i hung out with some guys in high school who were i think funnier than me and then in college you know i i think i got funnier again yeah but i was more of a smart ass in hebrew school than anywhere else i think probably that's where you found your voice well that was that's where i made teachers cry so i that's kind of my voice in a good way i don't know no no you weren't killing no i was like i was just relentless at being disruptive that's

awesome i would love to see the Wonder Years version. I mean, if we- It's the worst. It was terrible. If we can bring Baron back, maybe we can get some- It was just like this poorly parented kid that was unmanageable and causing trouble in the class. But funny. I got kicked out of a private school, and they wrote a letter to my parents saying,

Mark has the wrong kind of leadership qualities. Oh, my God. That's specific. That's my memoir. That's my next book. The wrong kind. I'm a comedian. The wrong kind of leadership qualities. I mean that's degenerate territory. Yeah, for sure. The wrong kind of leadership. Yeah, the wrong kind of

leadership qualities. We suggest a military school for Mark. Yikes. What kid though has any leadership qualities? Some of them, I guess. Look at your sports captains and bullshit like that. Yeah, you're right. Anyone who's in a club. And it really should be the people that are getting laughs.

I guess. No, they're the rogues. They're just trying not to get in too much trouble. They're just trying to charm their way through life. So you talk back to the teachers? Yeah. One of them popped me in the face once. Oh, my God.

So Seattle, that's so weird. I forgot about that reality so did you go to college I went to USC out here was in the acting school at USC you were oh yeah

for four years for four years I got I'd say maybe a year and a half paid for with you know academic stuff my grandparents

helped me out with the semester my mom did the single mom financial aid thing for I mean we just paid off my loans probably five years. And that was a good school, right?

Great school. Great acting program. And then you go back to Seattle? No, stayed out here. So came out here in 01, graduated from high school in June in Seattle from Shortgrass, and then came to LA in August. So how'd you start comedy in Seattle? So right before I left, I did one open mic just to go, at Giggles, just to feel like

I'd been on stage before I come to LA, because for whatever reason- But you wanted to do comedy? Loosely at that point. SNL was a dream for a while, and so it was, I knew a lot of those guys had stand-up backgrounds.

Right. And so when I got to LA, the acting school was so, the BFA program was rigorous, class nine to six, and then a show six to 11, and then I was in a fraternity, so I had no-

Of course you were in a fraternity but barely barely around why why would you even think to join one of more friends meet more people all right guess what the things that suck about fraternities suck and i acknowledge that did i make a lot of friends yeah were some of the guys was i the funny guy yeah would i dress up in characters and do fun things to the pledges instead of like take out my, you know, the shit that I had on these people that I don't know? No, I would do goofy shit. You don't have to defend it. I think I do. You're a frat guy.

Yeah. Do I like to party? Do I like to have a good time? Yeah. But the negative parts of the fraternal world, I do not embody. And I do not support. There is a way to do that whole world without a lot of the dumb shit that guys who come into that. Maybe this should be like a volunteer thing.

I do feel like I'm running for office. Yeah, this is something you should work on. And allow these kids to pick carrots over pizza. Yeah, there is something about that experience that was also uh instrumental still friends with those guys a handful okay uh some of them have done amazing things there are some that are tied i mean look being at usc from small town uh suburban washington i'd be in school and i'd be you know you're around first of all you know people with money that you didn't know was possible being in uh the frat one night, being like, I need to go make some copies for this paper.

Someone's like, oh, go use this kid's store, this kid's dad's store. I go, oh, he's got a copy store open now? He's like, yeah, Kinko's. That type of shit. Yeah, yeah. So you knew the Kinko's era? You said that like you got kicked out of the frat and didn't get a chance to chum it up with him. I did know the K goes there, yeah.

I think he went on Shark Tank with him and his brother is what I heard. Boy, that's a big payoff. And they got ridiculed because they were coming for money. Somebody sent me the clip a little bit ago. So USC is formative with the acting stuff, and then I start doing YouTube videos, and then stand-up, and then I graduate, and I work at Universal Studios as a tour guide. Wait, wait, wait. You're Russian.

So you do one spot before you go to college. One spot. And then you go and you do fraternity. I do a couple frat party stand up wise and I study abroad in London my junior year to do Shakespeare and all that stuff. And I do a couple- So real acting, full acting shit. Oh yeah, full on.

Yeah. So the program was great. I did a few bar shows while I was out there because i again it was just something i i did i'd done what's a bar show a bar show in london like okay i don't know where they not a club stand up like uh like not like a nice like a virgil out here but like a true bar okay just where stand-up was and somebody you were out there for a semester uh semester and a half yeah okay and about six months doing the shakespeare doing shakes plays seeing plays just i get a full program all the kids that i knew that were out there studying abroad had class

monday through wednesday i fucked up and did a program that was class monday through friday so i couldn't travel every weekend like most of the kids i knew were doing that's why they go yeah but wednesday but yeah i went for an actual education but went to amsterdam and uh and that was great ada mcflurry in front of a girl in the red light district yeah and danced with her simultaneously i'll never forget that that that was it that was the extent Aida McFlurry in front of a girl in the red light district and danced with her simultaneously. I'll never forget that. That was it? That was the extent of it?

I wish this story had a better ending. I wish I could say, I brought the McFlurry into the room. She gave me a discount. No, it's nothing good about that. I was in Amsterdam and I looked at them and I went up and said- You got to look. Yeah, but it's like, I don't know, it's kind of sad isn't it's very sad all right I think what was more sad is that I felt like I was taunting her with my delicious treat I don't think she wanted sex for me yeah she looked at my you know she definitely

didn't want it from me maybe I just created this idea though that they're in there yeah yeah look at that kid. Get him in here. Oh, my God. That's so funny. So after college, you got active and you live here. You say, I'm going to do it. I'm going to do the acting.

Oh, yeah. Well, the program was just so rigorous. And at that point, I truly had stripped away all my musical theater uh bullshit and felt like i had you know at least some tools to start but again you do not have much to build on when you graduate so i worked at a casting office um uh for three four years and then was doing open mics and i was in acting class and was doing the youtube videos and um what youtube videos i mean just making sketches with my buddies. And you're doing open mics at where? I mean, Ha Ha Store, Laugh Factory.

So I'd work a full day at Universal, right? I was Wolverine for a little bit, then hosted the Fear Factor live show, and then the tour guide. So these are acting jobs? I mean, that's why I loved working at the theme park. You're flexing that muscle. Right, you're Wolverine.

Wolverine, not so much. I got in trouble for improvising a lot as wolverine because my boss is like well just doing jokes too like i'm so then when i was a 1940s cop fucking full range to do and say whatever what were you doing how'd you fuck up wolverine i mean i took out like a squirt gun at one point was shooting a bunch of tourists in the back and like she was like you can't have a squirt gun as Wolverine. That doesn't add up. You got blade fingers. Exactly. And then I would say, I would make jokes too. And they were just like, Wolverine's not funny.

Oh, yeah. So the limitations of Wolverine at the theme park were holding you back a little. I think so. I ran over a kid's foot. As Wolverine? Yeah. With what kind of vehicle? An ATV.

Three times a day, myself, Storm, Captain America, Green Goblin, and Spider-Man would parade around the park. Yeah. And we'd pull out in these ATVs, and a kid ran up, and he wanted to take a picture, and I was holding up the caboose of this big party train, and I take the picture. I'm like, hurry up, Bubba. We got to do it real quick. And I know, it's like Wolverine's right here.

And I look over, and I think the kid's gone, and I just, know it's like wolverine's right here and uh and i i look over and i think the kid's gone and i just i rev it up and i take off and i feel my wheel go up and over something and so i turn back at the kid because i stopped and i was like oh shit sobbing yeah so now i'm just rummaging through my brain of like what do i say do i say hang in there bub do i say do you kill him oops do i fucking kill him so there's no way do i stab him with my plastic cloth i don't say anything because i couldn't think of what to say yeah so i end up just staring Do you kill him? Oops. Do I fucking kill him? So there's no way. Do I stab him with my plastic claw? I don't say anything because I couldn't think of what to say. So I ended up just staring him down and driving away.

So this kid, because I looked at him and I was like, he was crying and I was like, what do I say? Is he okay? You don't even know. Did he break his feet? All I know is that people would come to the comedy store that night when I would do the potluck and hold up pictures and go, hey, we took a picture with you. I thought we recognized you.

And I was like, hey, man, can you just let me have this? Yeah, yeah. Can you not bring- Shh. That's so funny, dude. Shh. Hey, hey, hey. I've seen it, man.

That's my other life. Tommy doesn't know. That's my other life. Oh, yeah, man. But then Bobby Lee took me on the road, and that got me out of the Universal gig finally. Oh, okay. So you're doing enough open mics, and you're putting together like 10, 15. Putting together 10, 15 and just, I mean, going for it.

The ha-ha was really kind. Well, when you open for Bobby, you kind of got to do 45, don't you? Minimum. Hey, Mark. Minimum. There were nights where he was like, I not feeling it do an hour and i was like what he's gonna do 20 yeah oh man i god bless bobby lee because that guy fucking it was very gave me a lot of great work but man opening gig but the headliners like you're gonna have to cover

most of the time i think it was san jose i'm not even joking i did 45 and he goes i'm doing i think he did i think he did 18 minutes yeah and guess what yeah no one had a problem with it they love seeing them they loved it yeah uh but so yeah it's not like you're up there tanking you can do it i think i had i mean look that was one of the things too having more time but you also know that they're sort of like why is he keep going thank you you think i wanted to be up there that long? 20 or 25 of just pounding away, I felt good on. And then it was like the extra 10, 15, sometimes 20 people looking around like, why the fuck is it? Where's Bobby?

Is everything okay? The ha-ha gave me a lot of work that wasn't bring your shows or open mics. And Bobby takes you on the road. Bobby takes me on the road. And so I'm getting a lot of. that wasn't bringer shows or open mics. And Bobby takes you on the road. Bobby takes me on the road,

and so I'm getting a lot of, and I remember Tommy would, it was before I got passed, and he was like, he told me I'm a road comic, and I'm like, what do you want me to do? I'm getting a chance,

because he's like, you're never here to do Sundays and Mondays. Yeah. Do the three minutes here, and I was like, I mean, I come hang out every other day. The three minutes here. The three minutes. Yeah, and I had to tell him without uh being a dick i was

like look man the amount of times i i stay and i sign up and then you tell me that people pop in and it's not gonna happen tonight it takes a toll on you and so then i go well fuck it i'll go to the haha tuesday through thursday where they're giving me stage time on real time yeah real time and then go on the road with bobby and try to build it up that way because that's what you find and i'm sure you know you could talk circles about this, where it's like, there's no fucking blueprint, but you I had this idea of what the blueprint was. It was like, okay, go to these shows and do this

and then try to get in here and hang out here. But it's like, at some point it was like, I just need to get stage time where I can get it. I mean, whether it was driving to fucking San Diego to do La Stats and then driving right back so I could strap on the claws the next morning. Yeah then uh strap on the claws yeah I mean yeah they took that was sad too when they finally fired me to take the claws back that was plastic claws yeah they fell off one

day in a group picture because I did I cleaned them together and I've never I still have nightmares of the kids who gasped because they thought that Wolverine had just been dismembered. Ugh. And, you know, and then part of you wants to be like, hey man, fucking, this isn't real. That guy's name is Chad.

He drives an Escalade with a bumper sticker that says, nobody's ugly after 2 a.m. You know what I'm saying? Yeah. That's not Captain America. Yeah.

But you don't want to break the facade of the fourth wall because these kids really think you're the real people. Come on, they do not.

How old are they? Oh man, it spans the gamut. I mean, I've talked to, man, I talked to Dave Matthews in full character one time with his family after a show. And I broke character.

And he was like, because he was like, is there a place to get a drink around here? And I was like, when I was a New York cop, and I go, oh, yeah, there's a little Irish bar right there. I'll walk you there. You seem like a guy who can throw a couple back. And I'm pleasured to be here with your kids. And that can be a lot. Just, you know, whatever. And he's like, yeah. So we start walking. And then I just just go hey man i go i was at the show last night fucking great and he goes oh shit he goes can you break character i go dude you think i want to fucking be here and he starts laughing and then

he wanted to buy me drinks in the bar and i was like i would love nothing more but you know couldn't drink with dave matthew because he couldn't get fired from if i was fired from a 1940s new york cop theme park job i think it would have sent me into a spiral so when okay so you quit the thing couldn't drink with Dave Matthew because he couldn't get fired from if I was fired from a 1940s New York Cop theme park job I think it would have sent me into a spiral so when

okay so you quit the thing and you're doing the comedy when did the acting start because you've done a lot of shit like you're that guy yeah we're about to go down the list

start reading a couple credits no don't do that people people people don't care no they care do they

but I mean but like what have you done my fiance did tell me to start telling on stage during this Pam and Tommy run to at least have people say that because she goes, because I'm really bad at that. I never, I, and people are like, what are you, I just, I'm like, how the fuck. The first time I think I saw you was, or noticed, was in Eliza's movie. Oh, cool.

Because that was like a real part. Yeah. And the hacks you came up to me. Yeah, hacks too. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You were the shitty club comic. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, so like, you know, I'm starting toacks too Yeah yeah yeah You were the Shitty club comic Yeah yeah yeah Yeah so like

I'm starting to see you around But you were in a lot of shit Before that Yeah Paul Feig gave me Quite a bit of love And the heat And small parts

And Ghostbusters I didn't see those It's fine And do you see According to Jim In 2007 No I was one episode of that

Good for you I'll send you the link Thanks And it Yeah Just your part though Just give me your part Acting is what I came here for seven i was uh one episode of that i couldn't go back i'll send you the link yeah thanks and um it uh yeah acting is your part though just give me your acting is what i came here real you got your real don't joke about that i will uh no it it acting is what i came here for i know which is why i like and usually that'd be a strike against you yeah me like you know like you just you just got the comedy's just so i can get some parts but then you got stuck then you got stuck as a comic it's well there's you know so funny do

people ever ask you because you uh you know you have have uh been anything that i got i was in my mid 40s no one's asking me anything yeah but like look at what you've done no i know but i mean no one's saying like he just got into to be an an actor. Right. Of course. But how do you feel with it now? Well, actually, I guess stand up was you were dug in quite a bit before acting. I'm still not that big of an actor, but I'm a stand up. But OK, so when I started, it was acting and then I started doing stand up and now they're synonymous. And now I can't. If you can't, if you ask me to pick, which people do, I will lean stand up.

Yeah, because it seems like you just it's just your nature i mean you i mean see the thing about acting really especially when you're doing it how you're doing it which is you're working a lot but it's a job you know it's a job yes and you don't have a lot of choice yes and you have to figure out how to make it a great job because it's your dream yes but a lot of times it's just sort of like, all right, you're on camera for 30 seconds and then it's like, all right, we're just going to relight.

And you're like, fuck, that's three hours. Yes. And then you come back and do the same 30 seconds and you're like, all right,

so you're going to do this again tomorrow. Yes. Whatever. Finding ways to be motivated and to enjoy it, but it's why, but this is why

stand-up is so fucking incredible. But like, you do hacks though and then it's a great little part. Yes. Right. That gets you a little exposure. The Pam and Tommy thing is a little bump. But you likemmy thing is a little uh i love it i also back to

the theater stuff i love the i love the collaborative right um even paul feig just threw me a little part in his uh netflix movie that's um with charlie starrett and ben kingsley and and even working with him it was like just the the trying to figure it out i like i like to figure it out yeah and we did season two of young rock in australia but here's like a great point of why i can't just you know i was like all right take a little break from stand-up take a few weeks off um while you're shooting to to not do sets man i had probably my longest day on a friday but uh the young comics who i become friends with uh this kid zach was like, I got you an hour spot

at Sit Down Comedy Club in Brisbane, which is like an actual comedy club, which was an hour away from me. And I was like, fuck, I can't do a full day. I'd already been up from three to do some other shit and shot all day. And I get off and I was like, I got so Jones to go do it.

And so I took an hour Uber and went there and it was awesome. I'm so glad I did. But also that got me through the shoot day because I knew i knew i had that waiting for me right right as a reward almost yeah yeah yeah and so so i guess that's good in brisbane i didn't love it it was good yeah i mean this this club the stage is real high the crowd was a little older but um but yeah fun i mean again it was there were some some rattier bar shows i did but they they love american comedy no i i do okay i I think, in Sydney and Melbourne,

but Brisbane was sort of like, I don't know, it's like Texas. Yeah, I did say, I did, because I started, I remember when I got on stage, they said, thank God you're not Marc Maron, and then when I got off, they said something else. Sure, sure. You know, anti-Semitic, but not for me to pass on to you.

Yeah, right. They were like, thank God you're not Marc Maron, but it'd be better if you weren't a Jew. But you tried. But yeah. Yeah, that's nice. Yeah, and that made you feel good. I felt great.

That's all I can do is try. Well, they like their voices. They do. Hilarious. I do a lot of voices. Yeah, I do voices. I like the act outs. That's so funny,

because your first impulse was like, fuck you. And then you somehow managed to stifle that. Yeah, I don't know. The little fat kid that you are. I'm trying to get, dude, yeah. I'm trying to get,

the fat kid will never go away. I'm trying to- He'll take it. The fat kid will take it. Dude, Burr, when Burr came on my podcast, and he goes, he had called,

there was this great moment where he butt dialed me. Yeah. And he's never called me. Right. Do you ever have someone in your life like this where you go, we've got a text relationship, never called. And then it rings. So I look down, it rings, it says Bill Burr. And I go, oh man.

And I'm telling Burr this. And I go, this happened yesterday. And he's sitting there listening. And I go, man, I kind of sat up. I kind of fixed my chops and kind of tightened my collar. And he goes, I just saw your whole childhood. He he goes you really were the fat kid weren't you your snacks were your friends he goes go on yeah okay and so how did I disappoint you because it wasn't really me calling you and it was such a a light bulb yeah shining on me but when did you let me ask you this because I'm just yeah going back because it's still uh I'm still

hanging on you uh saying I do that I do voices and I'm trying going back because I'm still hanging on you saying that I do voices and I'm trying to in this year dig deeper into I guess myself and me and Adam Ray and just the stuff that I've gone through and I'm doing it in chunks is there a point

when you like look I've got a white rapper brother-in-law named Derte there's a lot of material there. Sure. A lot of stuff that I want to talk about that I feel like. Your older sister? My sister, yeah. Oh, yeah?

The sister I grew up with. Yeah. Married a white rapper brother-in-law named Derte. Huh. YouTube his music. He's got some hits out there. Okay. He's got good, that's a good plug in.

So, what are you asking me? At what point do you just go, fuck it. Fuck these, the feelings of the people in my family. I just need to talk about this stuff. Well, I mean, but you can talk about it. Like, you know, I throw my parents under the bus pretty hard. And they can take it. See, I don't know if my, I do with my mom in a certain way. But I think she can take it.

But you love her. You love her. Yes. But your dad. I've got some stuff about a certain way, but I think she can tell you. But you love her. You love her. Yes. But your dad? I've got some stuff about my stepmom, right? Yeah, sure. The woman that my dad married that is probably not as funny.

Sure. But it's like- What's going on with your dad? He's chilling right now. He was a doctor, just retired from 50 years of being- But you get along with him? Great.

And I think because we didn't really have much when I was younger. And then wanted to have the relationship when I got older. So you had the relationship when you were older. Yeah. You don't resent the fact that you didn't have him around. No, because my mom crushed it. And it was like, again, things happen at other sports. I wouldn't be this if I just start breaking down crying.

If he was around? Yeah. But again, it's like she played both parts, and I'm fine with that. I don't know. I think it's almost greedy when people want two parents. Sure. One's enough.

I think you're probably better off raising yourself. Thank you. In my particular situation, I think they were obstacles to be honest giving me to a couple more responsible people would have been great did you get to a point though where you were where you truly just were like on stage and you felt like i guess a um almost a release in the way you were talking about what was happening with you and in your life and and making it funny but not feeling like you were there's like you know there's an

excitement to it and then you know to polish it i mean certainly you know coming from the point of view of like if you were to talk about being a fat kid or you talk about you know should do yeah yeah and but also you know making a choice over football you know to to do song and dance yeah would you talk about that no i mean like there's like there's a lot of stuff there that if you wanted to be but it's a whole different thing yeah and you're like a guy because you go up early or because you open, you feel like you have to kill right away. So at some point, you're going to have to let that go and really workshop shit. Well, that's why the road I love.

Yeah. Because when I'm doing an hour or hour and 20- Yeah, you got to pretend like you have the time. Yes. Oh my God. I'm just walking into these fucking slam city slam city, and you're the mayor. You're quick. This is why you host your podcast.

No, no, no. And not just a guest on it. No, but I'm not kidding, though, because that's how you write. You've also only seen me earlier. You haven't seen me, you didn't see me in the late store spots, or even now when I'll still do 11, 15.

But no, I'm just busting your balls. But I mean, even when you go on the road, but that's what it's for. Of course. If you're killing, then you try new shit. That's what i mean i do feel it is uh and i don't know what that i also feel like especially um when you're doing these shorter spots sometimes right now that you gotta yeah you gotta kill and you know you gotta hit it and also if you don't get if you don't hit it there's party that's sort of like i'm just gonna get through this you know i got i got

these five bits. Now all I got to do is this shit. Right. And then you get stuck in that. Yeah. You get the opener. You know what you're going to open with. Yeah.

And then you got your choice. Well, I don't. I don't. I go up there. Oh, you do crowd work? At the top. Every time. Yeah.

Because that makes it new for me because that way my plan is completely abandoned. Sure. I have chunks in my head I want to do and always a few new things so that the set is is worthwhile but if i don't do some bullshitting up top yeah because then it actually always i go i'm like i think i'm gonna open with this and it always changes and that way it's a completely organic yeah you gotta make it gotta make it fresh you know i'm not judging you i'm not i know you're not you're very supportive yeah no i think you're good and i just i'm just you know i'm just judging you i'm not i know you're not you're very supportive yeah no i think you're good and i just i'm just you know i'm just kind of like uh i know exactly it's hard with the

short spots to generate new stuff because you get used to stuff and then if you if you take a shit in the middle of your set then you got to put it back together in fucking 45 seconds yes what are you gonna do but i but back to your point of feeling the comfort of the store i do feel i don't feel the pressure of uh needing to kill anymore right there i i want to do? But back to your point of feeling the comfort of the store, I don't feel the pressure of needing to kill anymore there. I want to do well when it's a great crowd and the show's whatever. And a lot of times now, just from where we live and having more friends and people to come out and see you, like Letterman or whatever, when that happens at the store, especially

when the crowd's hot, you want to deliver. Sure. I just don't know what it means to kill. Like, you know, like it seems to me that if I really want to set my mind on killing, then it's I'm doing something other than being present. Yes. Do you know what I'm saying? Yes.

Is it like, I know the bits that are like, I can boom, kaboom, kaboom, and just sort of like, look at that. Look at that. Look at these fucking people laughing. And then like, you know, what is that? That's just sort of like, it's- Exactly. It's why I do crowd work, because I break the monotony of anything that I felt like

was going to be predetermined and planned. Yeah, if you know how to kill, there's no risk to it. I feel a sense of, you know, trust and confidence in myself. I feel like I'm growing each time when I do throw myself off course or dig a hole that I hadn't planned on and then can try to get out of that by putting this set back together and yeah and getting to a bit that i hadn't planned on or starting something and then having it tie into something i hadn't planned on doing that's what you got to do that to me is the most fun and that's i feel like uh i feel like the crowd picks up on that at least it it uh the spontaneity of it and

also like well that's how i tried that's how i work yes you patrice giraldo burr these are guys that i uh uh really uh looked up to when i started uh who have that have that flow the looseness that i feel like are conversational uh to a point to where it's um you know the you can't tell where the bits in the conversation i know like people say that to me when i get off now it's like would you just make all that up i'm like no, no, I worked hard for it. Yeah, for sure you get pissed. Yeah, because that's your tone. I don't quite get pissed, but it's sort of like... No, I've seen you throw a backpack. Yeah.

You had a backpack last time I saw you. Did I? And a bunch of new pins on your jacket. Did I? Remember I complimented you on your pins. That's right. That was another great thing. There were two pins. I don't have a lot of pins. Four years. It was a lot of pins for a jacket. Yeah. No, it's like two pins. The other day... Two new pins. Yeah. Yeah, but I don't have a lot of pins four years it was a lot of pins for a jacket yeah no it's like two pins the other day

two new pins yeah yeah but I don't have I'm not like Adam Eget I have 90 pins well that's a lot of decals and patches like one or two pins

a couple pins like one of them was a comedy store pin exactly what backpack you're like the guy that wears the band t-shirt to the show right

no I'm not have you done that nope I see people do it with me. You judge that person. Well, no, I wouldn't necessarily. Or they wear Marc Maron shirts to the show.

Yeah, and I like it. It's nice. Of course. Yeah, but I'm not that guy. I can barely wear t-shirts with things on them. I go through phases where I'm like, I don't want anything on my shirt. How did you feel when we were on the same flight to Utah? That was nice.

And we were going to Adam Devine's bachelor party bachelor party in the mountains somewhere this guy gets married in Mexico and he has a bachelor party where you gotta drive in Lake no the Ozarks okay yeah

your response was so oh my god what A I just I applauded the cause A talking across the aisle I would've been fine

if you had said what up and then put on your headphones and been like I'll see you back in LA right but you you had a couple gabs back and forth

and then you said and I said I'm going to Lake of the Ozarks forarks for a bachelor party you go oh awesome great that'll be oh that'll be yeah that sounds awesome and then i go yeah and then and then and then once we started walking off the uh the plane you ask more and more questions you just had this very real moment where you go that sounds like a fucking nightmare it's like and it turned out i mean it was such a shit show but you you saw the debauchery that hadn't even gone down yet which got me even more

excited for it just so I could it was fun? yeah it was great I mean again Divine is a Midwest Nebraska Omaha kid that has been drinking

since he was 12 so you truly get to find out what your liver is capable of I'm a you know one parent North Seattle didn't drink until got forced drank when I was in this summer stock production of The Wiz get to find out what your liver is capable of right i'm a you know one parent north seattle didn't drink until got forced drank when i was in this summer stock production of the whiz

by the director gave me a shot of tequila when i was 14 and um where'd that end up i mean that was i then my next drink was college after that okay yeah that did it huh yeah it was awful just burned wow weed though weed i i found uh at the end of high school. Thank God the end. So what's happening? You're going on tour? I'm on pretty much every weekend right now. AdamRayKami.com for all the tour dates. Yeah.

A lot of great clubs. And you're headlining. Headlining. Headlining for since- Again, don't get defensive. Can you tell? I mean, it's like There's so many people Still in My life at least

That will You know what it goes back to I remember when I first Graduated college And I would have Friends from Fraternity From

Back home in Seattle That would go You still doing the comedy thing I know Just because they They go what My parents used to do that They go I don't see you on a billboard

I haven't seen you on Hulu How come you're not on TV How come you're not on TV I saw you in that Jim Belushi thing, but you just said a couple things. And you're like, well, here's a list of my resume. I'm in a lot of things.

Yeah, that doesn't matter. Everyone has their own idea of what it is. They're sort of like, you know that guy? They always mention a more famous guy. Why can't you be, Adam Devine seems to be your friend. Yeah, do what he's doing.

Why can't you be on Modern Family? Fucking ridiculous. But tour right now, and then a podcast about last night, and Pam and Tommy's out now. Young Rock season two is out now on NBC, and then I'm in the show. What's that like? Is that like Chris Rock's show? No, it's about Dwayne the Rock Johnson's life. No, I know, but it's when he was a kid, right?

So it's three different time periods in his life. He's running for office in 2034, and then his flashback's to 10, 15, and 19. I play Vince McMahon, who created the WWE and then it's flashbacks to 10 15 and 19 i play vince mcmahon who you know created the wwe and was a you know father figure mentor to uh duane and uh so that's season two and then great and then gaslit comes out april 24th with uh with your girl uh betty uh yeah uh it's a uh julie roberts and sean penn about um the watergate break and i play ron ziegler nixon's press secretary So again, just another who's that guy playing that guy. Oh, great. Yeah.

But yeah, but that's good. It's great. Character acting is the best. Those are the guys that have the longest careers. I also came out here to act, and this has been the best year for it, and it's afforded more opportunities with stand-up, which is all I...

I see you guys doing the theaters and all that, and I'll be 40 in June, and it's a stacking of the chips I want to get better every year I want to make sure I'm taking care of myself maximize the family time and just get better and it's like when I see like remember when I saw you in Montreal

at some theater in the round almost had an amphitheater vibe you know what I'm talking about yeah it's funny there's certain shows and I want to make a point to tell you this that are just like stained in my brain as things that just, and hours that I've seen that go, man, I just, I want to get to that, you know, I can envision it, but it's like getting at that level where I have that size of a room.

Yeah. Because you know, I've opened for people in those rooms. But to get there where the people are because everyone was there for you oh that was that nice one the Palace of Arts yes that's a nice theater it was cool

because the ovation you got when you came out was so welcoming and so deserved and it was just a cool thing where you go oh man when you

sticking with this is a big part of it yeah evolving and being committed to it like you are. No choice. No choice.

Exactly though. Yeah. But then having all these people, everyone was there for you. There might have been a couple people that were being like- Just wandered in from the street. Yeah. Is this Arj Barker? Yeah.

Let himself go? Yeah. But no, mostly- Wow, I haven't heard that name in a while. Yeah. Australia's finest. Is he still there? I think so.

But anyway, so that was a cool thing to see, and it's definitely always been in the, I don't have vision board stuff, but as far as like, wow, getting to that point to where people are coming out for you and to enjoy it. Because I do my thing on the road, and the shows are fun and great,

and people walk away, and it's always bittersweet because they walk away, and just at DC at the Improv, which was probably the best room I had sales-wise in my career to this point, and having people that have come out who've come to shows before is special, but you just go, you get a taste of it, and you go, fuck, I want this.

How do you make it bigger? Yeah, you selling T-shirts? I'm not. I've got merch on my website, but I haven't brought it out on the road enough because I... It's a pain. I know, man. You've got to sit there. Even if you had a bad show, you've got to sit there.

I'm not going out there with my CD. I'd rather just chill it up with people and have... That show sucked. I'm keeping the t-shirts in here. I definitely have done that. I just give them to the staff. And I'm just losing money. But it's fun, man.

And this was a treat. I've told you every time when I see at the store certain episodes that I dig. I mean, the fact that I am sitting in the same chair where Obama has sat, George Clooney, and Dean Del Rey. Dean Del Rey. Clooney was on Zoom. Well, it feels like Clooney was sitting there. Josh Brolin. How's that?

Wow. I saw him at a bar in Venice once. Oh, wow. It was like my third celebrity encounter when I got to LA. How's that? Wow. Yeah. I saw him at a bar in Venice once. Oh, wow. It was like my third celebrity encounter when I got to LA. He's got a very familiar vibe. Like, you look at him, he'll look at you like, hey, buddy. Incredible, huh? Yeah. Wow. He's a good guy. I think. Homies? How many people do you

continue the... None. None. Not more than one or two exchanges, and then we're not friends. And who is that? It's a two-way street, but... I don't like... I mean, there are people that, like, will... You've got your friends....will reach out to me sometimes that I've had on the show, and I'm always surprised. Like, if I get a text from Jon Hamm, I'm like, hey, this is Hamm. Give me a text.

Cool. You know, me and Guillermo del Toro almost became friends, but I don't know. Something happened. What? It went south very quickly. Yeah, yeah. I'm not sure what I did. That's why I can't do it.

What about Clooney? Clooney's very nice. He seems like he loves you. Yeah, yeah, but no, we don't... I don't have his number. No Italy invites? No, nothing. But... No Candy Club invites? Nothing, nothing, nothing. Brad Pitt. Clooney's very nice he seems like he loves you yeah yeah but no we don't I don't have his number no Italy invites no nothing but um

no candy club invites nothing nothing Brad Pitt when I see him he loves me yeah but no

I don't have his number but it's better off because then like when you're it's like it's like it's like being with it's like texting with a

chick you just meet right right because you don't know when you're gonna fuck it up and so if you're texting with one of these big stars and all of a sudden

they're not texting you anymore, you're like, oh, goddamn it. I blew it. I blew it with Clooney. What did they say? Let me scroll back and see how they fuck it up

with Clooney. I blew it with Clooney is the name of your next album. Yeah, I haven't done it yet. I haven't done it yet. I keep my distance. I respect their autonomy. You read the room.

I respect their autonomy as major celebrities I love that alright buddy thanks a lot I'm gonna text you I can text you I appreciate it

alright man I'll text back okay that was Adam Ray the podcast about last night you can get it where you get podcasts and adamraycomedy.com

for his tour dates now here's some guitar I'm okay I'm alright just a little strung out You get podcasts and Adam ray comedy.com for his tour dates. Now here's some guitar. I'm okay. I'm all right. It's the little strung out from the road, from the travel, from the life. Thank you. Boomers. Boomer lives.

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