WTF with Marc Maron Podcast - Episode 978 - Fahim Anwar

Episode Date: December 20, 2018

Fahim Anwar's path to show business went through Boeing. It's not the most traditional route to Hollywood success, but it was necessary for a son of immigrant parents who did not approve of his standup comedy pursuit. Marc finds out about those early days in Seattle when Fahim was engineering by day and secretly doing standup by night. They also talk about comedy attire mistakes, experimenting with drugs later in life, and Fahim's new sketch comedy project, Goatface. This episode is sponsored by Squarespace, the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration, and YouTube Music. Sign up here for WTF+ to get the full show archives and weekly bonus material! https://plus.acast.com/s/wtf-with-marc-maron-podcast. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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T's and C's apply. Lock the gate! Alright, let's do this. How are you, what the fuckers? What the fuck, buddies? What the fuck, Knicks? What's happening? I'm Mark Maron.

This is my podcast wtf welcome to it how's it going are you all right you know i i gotta be honest with you i uh it's nighttime here it's obviously before the day that this came out and i've just been uh shooting glow for about 13 hours today. Now, that wasn't a work intensive day necessarily, but you're there. You're in the studio. You're eating food. And you're just it's there's something about that time that is exhausting.

So I'm a little loopy. But so if I sound a little tired, it's not because I'm depressed. It's not because I'm lethargic or sad or despondent or despairing i'm actually none of those things i do feel a little a little bloated that's what's happening too much food around and you know i actually lost all the weight that i lost specifically to start shooting glow because i knew there'd be food all around so now i'm just gonna have to accept that eventually i'll break down and i'll be stuffing donuts in my face and eating whatever the fuck they put out and lots of it. I've been stifling, been stifling. I actually held a piece

of a donut today, looked at it intensely, smelled it, connected with it. I looked at the donut and I was like, you know, I can really put you into perspective. I didn't say this out loud. There are other people around. But I was like, I understand what you'll do for me. I understand the sensations I'll get and the excitement of just shoving all of you into my face and just tasting the old. I was talking to an old-fashioned donut and um you know and they they know things there's a wisdom to the old-fashioned donut but i was like

yeah you know i i think we understand each other but i'm gonna have to i'm just gonna have to let you go um and sadly because i'm holding you that to be in the garbage. I could put you back in the box. Maybe no one would see it, but I'd know. We'd know together. If you entered someone else's face, you'd be like, you don't know this, but some other guy had me in his hands. Yeah, but you wouldn't be able to communicate that. I could probably just put you back in the box, but I didn't. I threw it out, and I felt like I was somehow a hero,

somehow victorious. Somehow that was a major achievement. Sometimes it's good to just kind of get connected and sort of really express yourself emotionally in a moment or two to a half a donut in your hand. All right? That's going in the book. I don't know what that book is, but it's going in it. Fahim Anwar is on the show today. Very funny guy. Didn't know him that well.

Seen him a few times. Very good comic. And he's a writer and cast member on that show Goat Face, which you can watch on ComedyCentral.com or the Comedy Central app. You can go to cc.com slash Goat Face, which you can watch on ComedyCentral.com or the Comedy Central app. You can go to cc.com slash Goat Face to check it out. But Fahim is here. We had a very nice comic chap, but also interesting life story, was an engineer for Boeing. Yeah, he's got that kind of brain and you can see it in his comedy and that's a compliment. We'll get into it.

Also, let's pick up this narrative because something nice happened. I talked about the teapot I bought last week, about the perfection of it and the beauty of it and how I long to have a craft. You know, I always think of that. This is my point of reference in terms of changing your life.

I think of that very last frames of Breaking Bad where Jesse is just in a wood shop. I'm like, hey, man, if Jesse can do it, I can do it. But I got an email. I don't know how she found me. Subject line from the, in parentheses, German potter and maker of your new teapot. See, now it's all adding up. Hi, Mark.

Thanks for including our little interaction from last Saturday in your fabulous podcast. You really hit the mark in a thoughtful, kind, and extremely funny way. Let me know if you need some teacups. I'd be happy to make some in the suitable color and form. All the best. I don't know how you say her name. Heike. I think H-E-I-K-E.

I think. I don't know. But she's a potter. A ceramicist. ceramics, with a K at the end on her business card. But yes, I think I may want some teacups. If we're talking teacups, Molly's up for some teacups. Seriously, though, I mean, I don't, oh, man, I don't know if I'm ever going to really know how to use my car's, you know, sound system. Is that troubling? I got a new car.

It's not a fancy car. It's a little fancier than the one I had. It's a 2019 Toyota Avalon. But there just seems to be getting more and more complex. Do I need Wi-Fi in the car? Do I need to do their thing, their insurer thing or whatever it is that connects you to, I guess, Toyota HQ? So you're being tracked by a satellite. They're already doing that with your phone.

I'm not going to get loopy on some paranoid trip. I mean, we're volunteering for it. Yeah, know where I am all the time. Could you please, just in case, someone it yeah know where i am all the time could you please just in case someone needs to know where i am all the time or i go off the grid you might want to figure out what happened did a sinkhole swallow me with my phone i you need to be on the grid something following us all the time right now i got my phone in the pocket i'm trackable i'm on the grid i'm a point i'm a dot on a large thing that some guy's watching and he's saying yeah i'm on marin we got him but in my car i don't know and i don't

and i keep saying to myself just read what would it take what would it take to master just the sound system in my fucking car i mean i got the book right there what would it take do i need all that shit do i need half this stuff that i long for simplicity that's yeah that was what i think that has something to do with the teapot thing and just you know whittling which i'm not doing enough of but uh you know it's just i some days it's just i'm so my brain is so drawn out. It's so spread out and interactive that it annoys me. I think there's only a few solutions to that, to reground myself. I felt pretty far away from myself the other day. I think what I need to do, and I've done this before and it's been a while and I haven't done it at the new house.

I think after I record this, it's late enough. It's after 10. I think after I record this, it's late enough. It's after 10. I think it might be time to walk around my house naked. To just feel it. Get undressed. Step outside.

It's dark. And just take a loop. Take a loop around the house slowly. Feel the grass on my feet. Feel the wood of my stoop, of my porch, and then perhaps walk myself out of the house. See where that ended up? I think it was a decent spiritual endeavor to wander outside naked within my yard, and then I'm locked out, and then it gets exciting.

And then it's meeting the neighbors in a unique way. It's not the first way you want to meet your neighbors is uh knocking on their door naked saying uh i locked myself out i was just out walking so can you help me out can i call can i call sarah the painter she should be up painting she's making some nice paintings fahim Anwar is a guy who I see at the comedy store, but I'd seen him and then I wouldn't look at his stuff. And he's a very meticulous comic. He's a very orchestrated, very organized. He does all the things. He moves. He does voices. He acts things out. He has good jokes. He's very organized and very funny. And I envy that. And, you know, I think he's a great comic. And we had a nice conversation. It was kind of interesting because we kind of, he's one of those guys you see around and we don't know each other, but we are comedians. And we did that talk. The talk we have here sometimes on WTF. We did that one.

we have here sometimes on WTF. We did that one. Fahim is the head writer and cast member on Goat Face, which you can watch on ComedyCentral.com or the Comedy Central app. You can go to cc.com slash Goat Face to check it out.

And this is me talking to Fahim Anwar here in the garage. It's hockey season and you can get anything you need delivered with Uber Eats. Well, almost, almost anything. So, no, you can't get an ice rink on Uber Eats. But iced tea, ice cream, or just plain old ice?

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covering only what you need, and policies start at only $19 per month. So if your policy is renewing soon, go to Zensurance and fill out a quote. Zensurance. Mind your business. I went on stage with a drink and a straw in this comic Frank Santa Maria. I don't remember who it was. I don't even know if it was a comic. They just said, don't ever, don't ever drink with a straw ever again. You lose your power. It's like the opposite of wearing a suit? Yeah.

I don't know exactly why. I mean, I don't know. I can see that. Yeah. Because you're making this point, you seem all macho, and then you purse your lips together. Right. Yeah. Frank Santorelli actually did that bit on stage, but it was a concerned audience member who came up to me and was like, you can't, you just don't.

Text away your edge. Yeah, don't do it. I don't know what it was. Have you performed in a suit before? Mm-hmm. I've performed in everything. Yeah? Not naked.

Yeah, I would never do that. I've been asked to do a wee. I don't like when it's like too specific, like, hey, we're all doing PCP and then doing a set, or you got to do like a trapeze act, and then you do, like no one just wants to do a straight comedy show anymore.

No, I know. You get butt naked and then do your jokes. They have that. I know, like in New York, but I would never. I don't even do it in my underwear. No, I won't do it at home. Yeah, you don't even run bits in the show.

No, I don't. But I mean, it's like, why would you? Isn't it hard enough? Yeah, stand up with all, isn't it hard enough? Yeah, stand up with all the right variables is hard enough. I can't stand

when it's any sort of theme where you gotta, you know, like they do it at the store or upstairs all the time. You know, we're just doing a show

about people's experience buying shoes. And you're like, what? I do, the performing in a suit is kind of, I always,

I had this joke one time where like I bombed in a suit, you know? Oh yeah. And there's nothing worse than bombing in a suit because people know that you thought it was going to go a different way like it's so premeditated like if you show up in a hoodie you're all dressed up yeah yeah like they picture you ironing your pants and everything and just like ah they're

gonna love me oh yeah it's special night for sure but if you just like rolled up in a hoodie they be like oh that guy just walked off the street and tried some things. He ate shit. He didn't give a fuck. He ran with it. Yeah. But a suit, it's like- You gotta-

Yeah, you think it's Vegas and- Walking off in his tie. Look at that. I don't, I think, I've worn them on TV. I did for my first, when I did Seth, it was my first late night performance. Seth Meyers? Yeah. Did you wear a full suit with a tie?

I wore a full suit, yeah. Just because- Did you go buy it for that? Or did you have it for a family event? I bought it. Yeah. Seth Meyers? Yeah. Did you wear a full suit with a tie? I wore a full suit, yeah. Just because. Did you go buy it for that? Or did you have it for a family event? I did. I bought it. Yeah. That's the good part. It's a good way to collect suits. Just do late night sets. No, but like how many suits did you have before that? Like one. Right. And it was baggy.

Yeah, it was shitty old suits. You're like, I'm going to do something nice for myself. I'm going to buy this suit. And that's the other thing is going on TV with clothes that really aren't yours yet. You have them, you haven't made them yours. It is kind of odd as well too where you,

you practice, or you do standup day in and day out with regular clothes and you're like, ah, the biggest performance of my life. Let me wear a suit. I know.

Let me reign it in. It's kind of when like some of our peers and stuff, they'll do specials and we see them in the clubs in and out and they know the beats of the clubs and they're like,

let me do Madison Square Garden for the biggest performance of my life. And it's just a totally different, or like a giant theater. Oh, yeah. It's just a totally different thing. I've been, I've made, how long have you been doing it? 16 years. Really? Yeah.

That's the trouble with like starting so young is that people just think that you're like six years in all the time. Well, I don't know that I noticed you until recently. Why is that? I lurk in the shadows. I don't overstep my bounds. But you're around? I'm around. I noticed you until recently. Why is that? I lurk in the shadows. Like, I don't overstep my bounds. But you're around? I'm around.

You know, I'm at the store. And you say hi to me and shit? Yeah, I'll say hello. But I'm forgettable. I'm the same way with like Rogan and stuff. Like, I'll say hi, but I don't, I would rather someone not know who I am than to know me and have a bad impression of me. You'd rather people not know who you are?

Yeah, I don't want to overstep my bounds. I'd rather someone not know who I am than for them to know who I am and have a bad impression because one, you can come back from. The other, you can't. Right. It's so hard to... Well, you're saying that if somebody's like,

that guy's a dick, you never... Like the first time I saw you at the store, if I was like, hey, Mark, I love everything you do in the podcast, changed my life. Yeah. And you inspired me to get into. I feel bad for you.

Can I get your number? Your voice would be weird. Yeah, my voice would be weird. But all of the passion. I know what you mean. I know. Yeah. You just wait low until somebody says,

like, hey, man, you're pretty good. Wait for it to come to you. Right. We're at the store all the time. Yeah. When the time is right. I was that way with Sebastian. Because I've been at the store for a while.

And, like, Neil Brennan, too. Just wouldn't. Just do my thing, head low, whatever. It's supposed to happen. It's supposed to happen. And then I think I was doing one of the shows in Montreal, and he was hosting the gala. Who, Neil or Sebastian? Sebastian. So that was the first time we talked.

Ever. And we'd seen each other at the store. He's also one of those guys, too, who's just kind of like- He's in and out. He doesn't talk to me. In and out. Yeah, he's also one of those guys too who's just kind of like he's in and out he doesn't talk in and out yeah he's not there to socialize he goes through the kitchen

when he goes he doesn't he won't even do the like I've seen him the Scorsese movie just his life as a I don't know what it is but he parks his car

and then I don't you know he don't the last couple times I've seen him he goes through the kitchen door yeah not even dealing with the hallway

doesn't even want to deal with walking into the club in the public way anymore he doesn't want to exchange any words unless a microphone is. But he's quiet, though. He's a nice guy. No, he's great. Yeah, he's a very nice guy.

But he's very much in and out. But on the clothing front, I've been doing this for a long time, like 30 years or something. And I've made a lot of horrendous mistakes with clothing. I remember you were talking about wearing a scarf was suggested. Oh, that was Mitzi. Yeah, you should wear a scarf. Sure, I wore it for a little while. Did you do beret at all?

No beret. I wasn't asked by Mitzi to wear a beret. She said you should wear a scarf. Did she tell Sam to wear a beret? You're a poet? No, I don't think she did. I think Sam had a problem with the fact that he was balding. And eventually he locked in to a beret and then later a bandana of some kind.

I see. When the times changed. Yes. When his times changed. He decided it was time for a bandana of some kind. I see. When the times change. Yes. When his times changed. He decided it was time for a bandana. But I've been on, I was on Letterman in a very shiny suit that I, for some reason,

every time I look at those old tapes of myself, I'm like, how did I look at myself and not realize that the suit was shiny? Like, how did I, it was a shiny suit. Yeah. I thought this is great.

It was of the time though. I guess it was. I went to Calvin Klein. They'll sell you on shit. Was it like NBA draft suits? Just were. I don't know what it was like. It was a fancy two piece suit and I wore a tie, but it would definitely had a sheen to

it. Then there was another, there was a five button suit that was in fashion for like a month. I wore that. Leather pants. I'm coming in. Leather pants. Leather pants. Yeah.

I did leather pants you were a bad boy back then no no it was a mistake it was how did it feel in the moment in the leather pants were you like this is a mistake was there some squeaking was there some humidity well i was like you know like hey dudes do this you know rock and roll man it was a leather pants and a nehru jacket nehru jacket yeah i don, man, a lot of mistakes. I remember. I'm just telling you, man, don't make the mistakes I made with the clothing. I was gonna do leather pants.

I had one coming up. This is good that we bang this out. I'm gonna have to text. Stop making it. Nicks on the leather pants. Yeah, yeah. But do you remember coming through Giggles at all? Because I started in Seattle.

Yeah, well. And I remember you coming through there. No, I mean, like, what like, well, I mean that's, how long have you lived here? Have you lived here? I moved fall of 2006 because I had a job out here in Long Beach. So I was in Long Beach at first.

Doing what? Engineering. Oh, so you were still doing that well into? I was engineer for like four years at Boeing while I was kind of, but the thing is I started in Seattle when I was 18. I know. I've been, I spent a lot of time in Seattle, but let's go, where were you born?

Seattle, Everett, Washington. Oh, in Everett. Yeah, no one really knows Everett. So I just went to Seattle. I kind of know Everett. Yeah? Yeah. Evergreen Hospital, shout out.

Yeah, but your parents are first. Afghan, yeah. But they're immigrants. They came here from Afghanistan. Do you have family in Afghanistan not that I know of really yeah

so they just cut out and that was it they didn't tell you about it they didn't want you to know about it I mean they tell us little bits and pieces and stuff like that

but they're done with Afghanistan yeah they're done I think I had a chance to do a like a USO type thing maybe not that you know how there's

different tiers of USO if you got a chance I did I did get a chance like a few years ago and they were just like, we got out. They're just very overprotective, you know. They're like, we don't know.

I'm like, I'd be safe to be on a base and all that. What town were they from? Kabul. Really? And you don't know the history of what they were doing there or anything? No, I know. I'm not saying that's suspicious. No, no.

They're all the up and up, guys. I'm here legally. Don't worry. They were ISIS freedom fighters. No, I'm not saying that's suspicious. No, no. They're all the up and up, guys. I'm here legally. Don't worry. They were ISIS freedom fighters. No, I'm just kidding. We call them freedom fighters over there. I used to have this joke. Like, I go and, like, I perform for the troops in Afghanistan.

Then I hop the fence into the other side just to, like, double dip. Just to get double the payday. But, because I have no sense of it. And I was hoping that you did, but you don't. Oh, no, I do. I just know kind of, like like how they came to america from there like what happened what year my dad came like in the early he came two times first when he was 18 yeah like in the early 70s yeah and then oh way back yeah and then so he came for college yeah you know so he came to minnesota and then north dakota i don't know which was the first or second so he went got a mathematics degree and then he went back

to Afghanistan and then he he was working there I think an insurance company company and then did a year of military because you have to do that yeah and then he could kind of see how like the Communism was taken over how it was changing the country a bit also so when the russians came yeah so before they pushed them out so it was kind of like uh before it was you know hot in the 80s like he kind of see how it was turning so he's like let me go back to america and get an engineering degree so then i think he got to minnesota and got a degree there and then asked my mom to to marry him, they knew each other from Afghanistan. And they were both in Minnesota, coincidentally?

No, she was still in Afghanistan. Oh. So... He went back and got her? Well, he didn't go back. He was able to say, will you marry me? And then she was able to get, like, say, get a visa to visit her fiance. But she had no intention of ever coming back, really.

Right. People were like, like oh give us this when you come you come back from america and give it she's like yeah give me a list yeah i don't know but knowing very well yeah and it was hard because there weren't a lot of visas going out at the time it was kind of couldn't get out clamping down it was getting harder to get out of the country and luckily she was able to meet up with my dad and in america and so they got in under the wire kind of when the when the first shit hit the fan yeah because my mom's telling me stories about you know people who've been to america and just any loose

ties they could say anything and it was just a scary time like what do you mean like uh whoever's coming into power like the commies and stuff they could just claim something like oh he oh he's a he's a part of this party or whatever and then like you don't see them anymore throw him killed or in prison jail or yeah kill or something like that i yeah i can't like i always i'm but i don't know much about him almost any other country you know sadly i know a little bit about this country because i live in it right but even when i talk to people from london i'm like what's going on yeah it's crazy and you're like, you don't care about Trump as much as all the papers here? They do, though. Not as much as here, though.

But like Afghanistan, I have no fucking idea. Yeah, I have a buddy, a guy I do my podcast with. Who's that? Ali, Ali Baluch. He's not a comic. He's just a cool Afghan dude. He's just an Afghan dude?

Yeah, he's an Afghan American like me. And he's over there right now just filming some stuff. So I'm following him on Instagram and seeing stories. You know how you post stories on Instagram? Yeah. So it's cool to get a little slice of life. But he can just come and go? Yeah.

They let you do that and everything? I guess so, yeah. I feel like I have this mythic sort of like Afghanistan. I know. I don't really, like if I wanted to go to Afghanistan, I don't know where I'd have to fly into. Right. There's not a lot of brochures.

There's not? I mean, Kabul's like a real city, right? Sure, yeah, yeah. People have jobs. It's not just like, it's not all Taliban craziness. Right, right, right, right, yeah. I mean, I imagine that's sort of like, oh, yeah, that happens, but it's out, you know, it's in the other part of town. Right.

It's on the other side of the country, but I have no sense of that, the menace of just living in Afghanistan. Yeah, I have no idea. There are people who would do it, but it just boggles my mind how to do it. And then you come, you guys, your dad settled in Seattle? No, so I think they were in Minnesota or North Dakota

when he was finishing up his- Or North Dakota. This is the big thing. I should really talk. What's in North Dakota? I'm going to say Minnesota. I'm going to go on the limb and say. That's better. So he's finishing up his degree Or North Dakota. This is the big thing. I should really talk- What's in North Dakota? I'm going to say Minnesota. I'm going to go on the line and say- That's better.

So he's finishing up his degree in Minnesota. That's nice. North Dakota. I don't know what's going on in North Dakota. Yeah, that's not good. Now I'm going to get shitty emails from North Dakota. Hey, it's cool here. Yeah, a little condescending.

I don't know if you know about this. It's better than South Dakota. You know what I mean? I don't know what- We're up top. I don't even know what the capital of North Dakota is. That's how bad we are. We're Sioux City.

That's Iowa. I did a show there one time. In Sioux City? Yeah. I was trying to get my hour ready and it was kind of late in the game and so they just had some weird markets for me to play. Oh, right. But they have a club there, right? Yeah. And how was that? It was alright.

It was just performing for a room full of white people. Very, very white people. They must have loved it they did yeah except for certain parts yeah you feel the resistance yeah don't you find that sometimes like uh sure you'll have everybody love you and all that stuff but you might have a slightly politically leaning bit like not with like crazy teeth even if it's like kid gloves i think it's just so tense at the time yeah that even if they get a whiff of oh you just feel it in your heart like you're not sure if it's something yeah something that would crush

yeah in a blue state where you're expecting a standing o yeah is the exact opposite and you're reminded yeah oh and you feel like right yeah like right at the beginning and but you're like i'm in i've got i gotta keep going yeah i can't i can't pull out now i'm just gonna have to sit in this weirdness and see if like if and can almost, he just sort of like, it's going to break a little bit, just a little. And then if it doesn't. Do you pivot or do you just plow through it? Well, I mean, I haven't,

I just started doing more politics in the last year or so. Do you get some walkouts at all? I've had people, I've gotten emails and I've had minor walkouts, but not major ones. I feel like you have your fans at this point. No, no, that's the thing. But like, you know, but people do. It's weird that how people get triggered and they just behave like children.

It's like you really couldn't sit through the four minute bit about that. You couldn't make it through. You know, it's crazy. I know you're talking about like I was at the OR the other night and sometimes I'll have a joke that. That's the original room for people listening. Sorry for the shorthand. I just think everyone is a comedy store regular. Me too. Me too. And i've just recently gotten emails it's like maybe you should give last names of people we don't all know who phil is oh that's true and

then i'm like i don't know who phil is who is he talking to but go ahead original room yeah so sometimes you'll be doing just jokes and everyone's having a good time and uh and then you might do be a slightly un-pc joke but it's a comedy club it's not a and then and people will like it for the sure for the majority but there might be like you'll see a pocket of people who just like they turn off and they're no longer into you anymore they were loving everything but now yeah you're a monster and i just kind of had this thing that it was a good set overall but i wanted to end on just kind of a little message. I go like, guys, not every joke is for everyone.

Just like not every song is for everyone. When you listen to an album, maybe you like three songs of this Drake album, let's say. Yeah. You don't, because you don't like the rest, you don't tune out and be like, fuck Drake. Yeah. What an asshole. But you don't listen. You don't tap out and you hate the artist because of one yeah i go that jokes yeah jokes are songs maybe sit that joke out right jump back in for the next one right we're not monsters these are all just

like ideas we're slinging did they connect with that yeah i think there's a faction of people who who who want that or who just want jokes to be seen as jokes because they're not anymore. But did you notice though that like sometimes, I mean, almost always there's about maybe an eighth

of the audience that isn't laughing properly anyways, that like if you're in the OR and you're killing, if you're in the- Do you zero in on the guy who's not?

Sure. Like you look at the back, as far as you can see in the back, you're like, what are those people even doing back there? Are they paying attention?

It's not that they're talking, but like you always zoom in on the, you're like, what are those people even doing back there? Are they, are they, are they paying attention? It's not that they're talking, but like, you always zoom in on the people that are like, nope, not happening. I don't. I gloss over,

I'm like, oh, it's very hard to make. I mean, for the majority, you'll have most of the room laugh, but then there's also people who just have strange taste.

That's it. That's it. You can't account for that. And I was talking about last night on stage where I'm sort of, because your initial reaction as someone inside of you

is like, why is that guy mad or whatever? And you don't know their life. I mean, what do you think? They come to the comedy club

and all of a sudden like the rest of their life is just on hold. That guy could be sitting there like, no, this isn't working. Yeah.

I'm going to do it. This is an odd profession though. I've always found like to go to the comedy store, you have to pay two drink minimum, a cover. It's a night out. It's a it's a pretty penny you know especially if you

bring a date it seems like it's it's reasonably priced or it wouldn't be so crowded i mean what are they really paying don't they get isn't it isn't it like a ten dollar admission fee it's not it's a pretty reasonable 10 or 20 cover charge and the original minimum and then you gotta pay for your date as well so i mean it's a it's a night out yeah you don't want to but it's always so odd so they're paying this money yeah and they're dressing up

and all that but stand up is almost the only art form where they pay all this and if they don't know who you are like you know you're Marc Maron

so it's a different thing but like I'm a cusper right now like I might be a funny guy but nobody knows who the fuck I am really really yeah yeah

no I mean some do like my few fans but you do the job you're very funny thanks yeah yeah but I mean, some do, like my few fans or whatever. But you do the job. You're very funny. Thanks. Yeah. Yeah, but I mean, Bill Burr talks about it in his come up, just how killing in obscurity. Yeah, right.

Because I'll get offers to do gigs somewhere, but the money's not great. Right, right, yeah. You kind of have to get some TV stuff, some movie stuff, some credits before the money reflects kind of where you're at in the game. It takes so long. And I'm not a diva about it. I don't need a ton of money. I live in a studio apartment in Koreatown right now.

Good for you. I live very modestly. I'm not like bawling out of control and I need crazy money to go somewhere, but I just need it to make sense. Sure, to justify your work. Sure. Yeah, and that's not coming? No, it is.

I mean, everything's a slow burn yeah yeah comedy but you do realize at any given time there's only about like nine or ten comics that are like massive yeah i always look at stand-up comedy it's like tennis yeah it's so hard right it's so hard to be number one yeah forever sure and there's so many variables you can be in the top 10 and yeah but the board shuffles a bit. Sure. And if you can still play the circuit for a good amount of money and you still got some name value and maybe your own sneaker, you're all right. For sure. But back to my point about like-

I think it's a good analogy. When people come in, they pay this money and then you just sit with their arms crossed. You're paying so much money and you're like, who's this guy? Think he's going to make me laugh? Yeah. Hey, you paid money. Defiant. Come on.

What do you got? Yeah. No one goes to the doctor and says, this guy thinks he's going make me laugh yeah yeah hey you paid money yeah defiant come on what do you got yeah like no one goes to the doctor and says this guy thinks he's gonna fix me yeah right we'll see doc well yeah well you kind of do though don't you no i trust my dog you do but they don't always know what's wrong i know and they tell you what they tell you what it might be they're like well this could be a couple things like how do you not know like how long have people been around in doctors? You should know. I don't know. We don't, this is a weird thing. I like, I've been in the hospital one time and then.

For what? Oh, I shouldn't be saying this. My mom's going to listen. Is she? Yeah. She's a big fan. No, she's not. She listens to everything that I. Oh, of you.

Of me. Not of WTF. She loved your Josh Brolin interview. Oh, yeah. Yeah. She's a big man. You have to tell her. What was it? Embarrassing? No, just because she's so overprot interview. Oh, yeah. Yeah. She's a big man. You have to tell her. What was it?

Embarrassing? No, just because she's so overprotective. I had pneumonia. So I was in the hospital for like two weeks. Oh, she didn't know. You didn't tell her. You just told her you had a cold. That's one of the things you learn about Middle Eastern moms is like you don't tell them everything

because- That's why you don't know about every mom. I guess so. But this is even more so. Really? Yeah. Because when you get sick, your brown mom will think that it's your fault. Your what mom?

Brown, whatever, it's a shorthand. I don't know if that's offensive or not, but I think it's okay. It'd probably be offensive if I said it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I have carte blanche to say it. Brown. But just whenever I would get a cold,

she would be like, I told you. I'm not allowed to get a cold. Right, right, right. She told you what? How could I have prevented it? Life happens. Yeah. But when I was was in the hospital these doctors from different departments coming on checking you you're like this is so-and-so from this department this is so-and-so yeah and then they're on the bill like they were just running a train on you like just like a medical financial train that's true so you got what do you got sag insurance yeah well that's the thing

like i noticed that too recently it's like well, well, you know, we don't know. This is a little weird. We're going to do like 100 tests. 100? And then you realize, like, that's the racket. It's almost like chum in the water. Yeah. They're like, yo, so-and-so's in room 35.

And like everybody, like endocrinology comes in. Like, oh, how are you feeling? Yeah. And they touch your forehead. Yeah, yeah. Cha-ching. Yeah, exactly. That's the racket.

It's sort of like one time. But that's also the benefit of having good coverage see we can't be too cynical and we're going to sit here and complain that i go to the fortunate enough that's exactly like i go to the clinic and three doctors see me it's a fucking racket if we didn't have it it'd be horrible be homeless right now i like i like having all the tests and it just didn't really dawn on me that some of them were unnecessary yeah a lot of them are yeah it's like when I go to a fancy hotel, like just being in this business, I'm not wealthy, but sometimes you'll book a role and you are that, you are like pretend wealthy for a week.

They'll put you up in a really first class, fancy hotel. I was staying at this hotel. This was for Whiskey Tango Foxtrot, that Tina Fey movie. So like I took my mom to the premiere and everything. And we're staying at the hotel by Columbusumbus circle i forget what it's called but it's so nice in new york yeah right there oh yeah and i would never stay at a hotel yeah yeah and then i just realized uh everyone wants can i get your bag everyone who says can i get your bag give me money yeah right and so like towards the, I'm just clutching my bag. I'm good. I'm fine. Thank you. I do that too when I get out.

It's so fucked up because I carry a duffel bag. And if they send a car for me and I get out at the hotel and the two guys are like, I'm good. I'm good. I got the door. Don't worry about it. But it's not so, like you can give them a dollar, but sometimes you're like, how much do I spend? I'm not there yet. I can't give, I need a dollar. No, you don't need a dollar.

I need to do laundry. It really comes down to like, how much do they I'm not there yet I can't give I need a dollar no you don't need a dollar I need to do laundry it really comes down to like how much do they expect like what does a bag cost and if I gave him a dollar a dollar he'd be like shitting on me with his boys

you know right that's the other thing how do you know what you're gonna get into you're better off just handling it yourself and being a dick yeah

a cheap asshole as opposed to like that's the dollar dude and it's too much exposition to be like I know I'm staying in a very fancy hotel but I'm not very wealthy.

I just got a very little role in a movie. I might get cut out. I don't know. We'll see. There's not enough time for that. You could make the time. Maybe I'll just like print it out on a note and just hand it out. Like a deaf guy on a train.

Trying to sell some pens. Please don't ask me for money. I've just got a role in a movie. This is a good way to expedite my life. Okay, so they settled in Seattle after North Dakota or Minneapolis? Yeah, my dad was finishing up his degree, and my mom was saying she was really sad just because it's not home. Did she get a degree?

No, she just- Yeah, she studied French literature in Afghanistan. And then Boeing came by, and they had brochures. You have brothers and sisters? I have one brother. Older, younger? Older, dentist. A dentist?

Killing it. Yeah? Yeah, my parents are one for two. Well, you should talk to him about the racket. Oh, yeah. I think that's different. It's just a mouthful of money, man. That's true.

Oh, my God. Are you kidding me? They joke around. They go like, drill, bill, and fill. What kind? Does he do root canals and shit yeah oh it's very cool having a dentist brother in the family it's like having a mechanic just someone you could trust and and you and you've got you go to him i go to him i haven't had to have any dental work done so i'm

kind of lucky he'll check on it really yeah i just have cleanings 34 huh nothing nothing no cavities the fuck yeah i do wear retainer at night though. Oh, you do? I do. Why? Just because I had braces when I was a kid and I just want to- Maintain your straight teeth? Yeah, maintain. I'm in Hollywood, baby.

Yeah. You seem like a little show business. Nah, not that- I mean a little bit, I guess. You seem like you got it together. You got, you know- Yeah, I'm trying. You're not all fucked up. Yeah.

I'm not a child star. I'm okay. But yeah okay but yeah no yeah but it seems like you manage yourself pretty well I think you know the engineering thing helps just having yeah let's get to that so alright so your your dad's in North Dakota or Minneapolis your mom's bored and then Boeing does what comes by they're trying to recruit to North Dakota yeah yeah we don't know somewhere it's vague Minneapolis they're looking at colleges for just to recruit

some fresh blood right and your dad's doing graduate work in engineering no just getting his four year degree huh because I think

he just had to because he already had a mathematics degree he just needed to be in college for two more years and he'd be able to get he had an Afghani mathematics degree

no because he came the first time to America oh and he did that yeah and he needed two more years to knock it uh to get an engineering degree because i guess there's a lot of uh overlap right so he gets the degree boeing comes by like job fair stuff yeah my parents see a brochure of seattle they don't really know what seattle is or you know but it looks nice on the brochure this is the 80s uh probably late 70s i think oh yeah yeah or or maybe yeah yeah i think late 70s so before it blew up it's all that's there is boeing at this point pretty

much right yeah there's no amazon there's no microsoft i mean boeing is yeah exactly so boeing was like og right and it was still like a small city kind of full of drugs and weird and rainy yeah that's why they went you know yeah all the. Because all the opium in Afghanistan, they go. Great dope. They're like, oh, finally, we're home. My parents were mules is what I'm trying to say. They both came with an ass full of heroin. I'm trying to adapt their life into a screenplay. It's sounding good to me.

A lot of good classic rock, you know? Yeah, sure. So I think the brochure seemed like a good deal. Yeah. So my dad goes to Seattle, my mom as well, and they start their life brother's born yeah and that's it seattle i come yeah and then like well that's a that's a that's a lifer job for sure is he still there coal mine he is he's been there so long really and then i got a job at boeing it's like we're both working at the coal mine it's i think i think you're exaggerating that's true that's this is how you alienate those people, the working people of this country. I heard coal is the energy of the future.

Yeah, again. Again? Oh, cool. It's the energy to end the future. Oh, I misheard. I'm sorry. I do that a lot. Maybe it's like late onset dyslexia.

We almost had a future, but then someone decided coal needed to come back. Yeah, but it's clean. Oh, yeah, sure. It's very clean. It's very clean. All right so so you grow up in seattle yeah in the middle of all that pretty much sub pop is happening there's sure but you know the grunge was hitting when i was a kid yeah but i was too young to really appreciate or i i cared more about you seem more hip-hop oriented yeah i mean less so now but but in my youth i was all about 90s gangster rap like dre snoop yeah you dog dog food by the dog pound yeah you've woven that into the fabric of your

your act i guess so yeah it's there it's a little bit i'm trying to think do i have hip-hop stuff in my from what you caught no you do a whole bit about 90s hip-hop oh back in the yeah i guess on my special my last special but not when was that i didn't foresee so like two years ago that's not well that's not like a million years ago don't talk to me like you know oh man that's the old man that's the old man you haven't seen a new me dude i'm like a butterfly now you saw me when i was a caterpillar but no my point is that because i've talked to people that, I mean, you were obviously born here, but you grew up as a Afghani American, right? Yes.

And when I talked to Jimmy Yang, there was something about hip hop and about that life and about the language of that, that really taught him about America. About like, you know, sort of how to fit in or like what, it was an in culture thing. You make a choice to sort of like dig into that as a way of communicating, right? Yeah, for me, it was my peers, my friends were listening to that more so than- It's just a popular music, yeah. Yeah, and I'm sure there was other kids at school

who were into Nirvana and yeah, I can appreciate Nirvana and all that, but it wasn't embedded in my DNA. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like Dre, The Chronic and yeah, those were big albums for me and everything. But you weren't smoking a lot of weed.

I smoked weed for the first time like three weeks ago. See, that, really? 34, yeah. See, this is what I mean about managing yourself. You knew well enough

not to get fucked up somehow. I guess so. It was just part of my identity for so long that I never did it and then for some reason... Your identity of not doing the stuff, you mean?

Yeah. Oh, but listening to hip hop and living the life. Yeah, yeah. To live everything about the hip hop lifestyle except for the smoking weed. Yeah. That part. Uh-huh. So you smoked it for the first time three weeks ago?

Yeah. And was it a controlled environment? Were you with people you trusted? Yeah. I did shrooms before weed. Because Ari Shafir, somehow he found out I'd never done marijuana. He's like, you should do shrooms before weed because ari shafir he somehow he found out i'd never done marijuana he should do you should do shrooms before we no one's done that before oh really he's like he just wanted to do it as like a novelty a groundbreaker yeah yeah you want to

be a pioneer and i just always wrote it off and i'm like i don't know whatever and then something happened where like uh where you know benji Benji, Benji Aflalo. Yeah. Yeah. So his grandma has a beach house in Malibu. So we did it there. Just, I wanted to, part of being an artist is kind of just experiencing a little. At 30, what hell of it?

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Take your time with it. Yeah. Don't rush into it. I'm going to tell my kids, if you want to smoke weed, wait till you're 35. Like 30.

Yeah. Don't do what I did. I did it one year too early. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. we'd wait till you're like 35 yeah don't do what i did i did it one year too early yeah yeah is it no wait till it's there's no way it can define your life or be a big deal yeah i i like that and i think it's smart so how old you when you did the mushrooms uh like 32 31 or 32 so just a

couple that was too scary like i would never do that again you're at the beach house with benji and who uh benji matt edgar ari shafir. Yeah, that's the crew. Everybody's going to do them? Yeah, and they went with the intent. They're going to look at you. No, just like put me on display like I'm an animal. Oh, yeah. Let's see what happens to him. It's the first time he's done it and he's in his 30s.

Yeah. So you all tripped and you got outside. You weren't confined. Yeah, there was a balcony. But you didn't go down to the beach? At the beginning, we did, yeah. That's a good thing about when you do them, you should have the freedom. It shouldn't be at night.

It should be during the day. And you should be able to move around a bit. Take a walk. Go sit at that place. Like, I don't want to sit here anymore. Let's go down to there. Yeah, the wind felt. I never felt wind really before.

But on that, like on your face. Yeah, so you locked into the wind locked in the wind yeah and did you freak out yeah first half of it was just very scary because i'm analytical and i try to understand everything i was trying to understand the universe and like god stuff and all that and oh you really want you you heard i went down you'd heard that that that's that's the right trajectory to take i don't know, I don't know what's right or what's wrong. You just did that naturally? Yeah, my brain just went there. And it was just like, I didn't have the answers.

And it was just scary. No answers for the engineer. That's bad. Well, I'm a human. I'm trying to understand. Sure. But math couldn't. You cannot.

Yeah, math wouldn't help you. All the Pythagorean theorems in the world, all the Fibonacci sequences. Weren't going to help me. Weren't helping me at this point. All the quadratic equations.orean theorems in the world, all the Fibonacci sequences weren't helping me at this point. All the quadratic equations were failing me. That must have been very scary for you. It was very scary.

I was like, I need chalk. And a blackboard. Yeah, quick. I need a goodwill hunting this before I drown. Did they have to kind of reel you in? Benji would. Benji would be like, hey man, what's going on? I was like, I don't know, man.

Just feel weird. And then he'd be like, you're supposed to. Because you're on drugs. Yeah. But I'm glad I did it, experienced it. That's done. Probably not for me, yeah. No, not again.

The second half though, I was just like laughing so much. Just things were so funny. Oh, that's good. Yeah. Who was funny? Because I can't imagine. Just things. No, not again. The second half, though, I was just laughing so much. Just things were so funny. Oh, that's good. Yeah. Who was funny? Because I can't imagine. Just things. Things become so absurd.

Not any of the comics you were with. All that too, conversation and all that. All right, so you got that out of your system. Yeah. Did you get any resolution on the universe or God? I mean, as an engineer, did you realize? Many years later, though, I just kind of had this epiphany. I go like, it's okay not to know.

We're not supposed to know. Oh, wow. That's a big deal. Yeah. For you. For me. Yeah. Hmm.

But you can't overthink that either. Can't overthink it. Because then you get really- And I do still consider myself Muslim at heart. Muslim? Yeah. I mean, I don't pray five times a day. I'm not the best. I'm not the most...

Do you have a mat? I don't. I don't know. Yeah. I wonder if we... Do we call it a mat? I don't know. Like a prayer rug. I'm asking you. It's a prayer rug. I've just never heard it referred to as a mat. Like we're going to bang out some warrior too. Yeah, where's my mat?

Hey, don't fucking pray on my mat, dude. That's mine, all right? Get your own mat. What's it called? A prayer rug? Probably. What do you mean probably? A ginomaz. Is that what it's called?

A ginomaz? Yeah. Well, I mean, that's just in Farsi, I think. They call it that. I'm never actively, like I saw, I was in New York, and I was just at the Whitney Museum, and I went outside. There were people selling, there was a guy in the corner selling hats. It was getting chilly.

And then there was a dude doing his prayers in the middle of the day, just on the street. That's OG. There's Muslims like that. Just like, hey, I'm going to drop down anywhere. But for some reason. At an arcade. Like it's time to. Yeah, it's time.

It's time to bang it out. Which way is Mecca? Yeah. Good. Just bang out the compass. Yeah. Yeah. Right.

On their iPhone. Or just asking everyone like, hey, do you know which way? Mecca's North. I'm looking for. But no, but I'm just happy that I'm not the kind of person that's sort of like, what the fuck is happening? Like, I'm just, you know, it's like, all right, that's what that guy does. Yeah.

Because then you go across town, they're just Jews doing their thing, you know, in their outfits. And it's like, all right, okay. Yeah. There's part of me that sort of env envies the discipline of it the ritual of it you know what's my ritual like i'm gonna make a smoothie you're like you're like well i've had three cups of coffee yeah just popping into starbucks as you're praying five times a day it's kind but that's that's the way capitalism works yeah so you've still got that in you and

you're in it you're in the you're on mushrooms and uh and you're still you realize you're still muslim at heart yeah or just trying to figure you know because like when you're in the you're on mushrooms and uh and you're still you realize you're still a muslim at heart yeah or just trying to figure you know because like when you're a kid i think it's just it's you just sort of like bite into religion when you're a kid you have to you yeah and you kind of you don't realize until you get older that that's like a life preserver an existential life preserver your parents toss you so you can develop you know like it's like what happens to us when we die oh like jesus is up there and all your all your grandma's up there oh great yeah right because it feels good but to keep the lid on your head yes to keep the lid on because if you're like well no one really knows you know how you don't remember before you were born? Yeah. Might be like that after you die.

You're like, oh. I'm going to die? Yeah. All right, well, have a good day at school. Yeah, I get that. I don't think I ever thought about it like that. But you just buy into it so, or just like, you don't even question it. Right, you were brought up pretty religious?

Not hardcore, just, but my parents, I realized as I got older, they weren't as like hardcore as I thought they were. They kind of like, it was rocket fuel. It was rocket fuel when I was a kid, so I could feel like they did their part. Well, that's good because that's the kind of Muslim that a lot of people who don't understand it don't think exists, that there is this sort of middle.

There is, yeah. Of course there is. There has to be you fucking kidding me i mean like listen i'm getting defensive about it that whole idea that like all muslims are you know they're just doing a one youtube video away from radicalization like we're all on monkey bars getting ready yeah like neil brennan has a great joke he goes like everyone's afraid of muslim he goes you know how you're not great at your religion right they're not great at theirs either of course yeah i Yeah, I think they just see CNN or whatever

and think it's all hard-lined people and what really is unfortunate though, I think whenever, you know, an attack is carried out by someone who looks,

you know, Middle Eastern or something like that or doesn't even look Middle, they just are but it's a guy in plain clothes, they'll beat up

some woman in a hijab or some guy in a turban who's like a caricature of a middle eastern person it'd be like not even he's not even a muslim half the time and the guy who carried out the attack was just wearing jeans and a shirt it'd be like if a white guy like named rob stole my wallet and i just beat the shit out of a guy in a cowboy hat and cowboy boots because he's the most white caricature right that i could think of right and but yeah but you'd have to be in a country

that those people were a minority yeah just wearing cowboy hats in like saudi arabia one caricature right that i could think of right and but yeah but you'd have to be in a country that those people were a minority yeah just wearing cowboy hats in like saudi arabia one of the four guys yeah yeah that is that's pretty like incredible though just uh the amount of fortitude it takes like with that climate and to still draw that much attention just to be that devout where you're like i'm still wearing the hijab and it's tough well i think that they're usually it i i definitely feel for them if they don't have a community in the place where they live yeah do you know they're usually i think what what keeps it together is that you have a mosque or at least a community to where you're like you know after your day of being looked at like you're a freak you can go to sure your neighborhood where it's like oh okay yeah but it would be so easy for people to just

say oh i don't want to deal with it anymore and just kind of dress more american generations of course yeah of course but i respect the layer to be like no i'm still like that choice is still incredible well yeah well i think it's it's whatever you believe i think it determines the religion survival ultimately right i mean somebody's got to be doing that or everybody's gonna be like now we gotta got away from that because everyone all religions get away from it eventually yeah you know jews were that we got to figure out how to pass maybe we should stop talking like this you know don't wear the yarmulke outside. Yeah. Even with me and my brother, I think, you know, my parents are from Afghanistan,

but we were born in America. So you're going to, it's going to slip away a little bit. Like, obviously I have that. It's still part of me. I kind of walk this line of East and West and dichotomy, but over time it's,

we are in America now. So it's going to become more and more American with generations. Yeah, of course. Right. So, but, but, but you,

your folks, they just kind of did what they thought they should do to kind of get you guys at least sort of in the lane. Yeah. Like culturally, it's kind of more culturally though. Like this comedy thing, I'm not, I shouldn't be doing it.

But wait, but what, did you have a mosque that you guys went to? No, that was like a, my mom would teach. We went like a couple of times when we were kids, but then me and my brother,

we really didn't want to go. We're like, no, we'll learn it. We'll learn it at home. Just, you know, like was like, my mom would teach. We went like a couple times when we were kids, but then me and my brother, we really didn't want to go. We're like, no, we'll learn it. We'll learn it at home. Just, you know, like, no, we'll figure it out. Come on, just teach us. Were there holidays, though, where you had to go? No. Oh, it doesn't work like that?

It's not like Jews. It probably is. No, so you really just. We just really didn't want to go. We just didn't want to go. We're like, no, we'll learn it. Just teach us, Mom. We don't want to.

But was there an Afghani community in Seattle? There was. So it wasn't so mosque based, but my parents would have this. There were some other Afghan families in the area. And every month they would kind of alternate having a party, just like a gathering. With familiar foods. Familiar foods, people. And just, I think it was a way for them to have their kids not lose touch of their culture.

Do you speak it? A little bit, like come back. Come back as a little. Like salam Mark. Chiturasti. Yeah, that's it. Just pleasantries. So they didn't speak it at home?

They did. I like to blame my brother because my brother didn't talk for kind of long. Like he was a late bloomer and my parents were worried and they asked a doctor, they go go how come he's not talking and the doctor said oh he's probably he's confused between english and and

like you know farsi yeah so maybe just speak english so they just spoke english around the house yeah and then when i came along that's just what everybody was speaking and then we spoke farsi unless when they didn't want you to understand what they were saying did they do yeah or when they got mad or when my mom would say, like, clean your room and I would understand like commands

and just certain like catchphrases and stuff. But carrying a conversation is terrifying for me because I am Afghan. I look the part like, and if it gets into advanced interactions,

I just seem like I eat paint chips or something because I gotta be like, salam and then when it gets like deeper i just like stare at them they're like what the fuck is wrong with this guy whereas if i was a white guy they'd be like oh he's trying yeah yeah oh that's great but you can you understand it as maybe i can understand i can understand more but

what do you do with that nothing just give the give the thumbs up. You nod. Yeah. Uh-huh, yeah. Yeah, and it sucks having to use, like, because my grandma, I love my grandma, but she doesn't speak the best English, you know? So that's one of my regrets is that I kind of have to talk to my grandma through my mom or, like, a translator, and, you know, it'd be nice to have a conversation with your grandparents. So the idea of being a stand-up comic in this,

with your grandparents. So the idea of being a stand-up comic in this, I mean, I've talked to people who come from immigrant parents a lot, have different kinds, and there's a lot of pressure to get a secure situation. Yeah, this is like me and my dad were at odds for quite a bit

when I was doing stand-up. It was kind of like a big issue. But you decided, you pursued engineering, like without a question. You went through your non-wheat-smoking hip-hop life and youth and when you went to college you're like i'm gonna do this well what happened was i mean i was in i was in video productions i always kind of had that gear like i loved comedy and i would i was in drama for like a year or two in high school and my parents were totally cool with all that yeah where'd you pick up all the dance

moves just uh I was really into Michael Jackson when I was a kid and I would record music videos, I would slow them down. That's just watching Michael Jackson.

Well, because you go out of your way in most of your hours to dance at least a bit. I guess so. You know, somebody...

What do you mean, guess so? I just watched you dance three times. Wait, what did you watch? A bunch of different clips. Oh,

clips, clips, okay, yeah, yeah. What do you mean? It was from No Business Like Showbiz? Right, right, okay. I. Wait, did you watch the, what did you watch? A bunch of different clips. Oh, clips, clips, okay, yeah, yeah. What do you mean? It was from a no business like show business? Right, right, okay. I don't, sometimes you'll do these things and you don't know what people have seen. Well, how many specials have you done? Just one.

Okay. But I don't know if you saw me in the OR or what you've seen, you know? I don't see, there's not a lot of room for dancing in the OR. But more so than New York. I was thinking about like New York comics and I think that style

is a product of- The pacing style? Just sort of like the stand and deliver. Oh. Because a lot of the clubs are downstairs. That's possible. They don't have a lot of room. The old improv had a little bit of room, but yeah, the cellar's tight. And Catch a Rising Star back in the day had a little bit of room. But no, I mean, yeah, I get what you're saying. Yeah, sometimes I think that if I was a comic in New York, I don't know if I would be the same comic,

just from the environment. It's just kind of interesting to think about. You'd probably go to dance. You'd be like, I'd be dancing right now. Yeah, exactly. I can't, yeah. You'd figure out a way to do it, I think. You like to dance.

But one of my, yeah, I'll throw it in there. I won't hold back. I just kind of find like act outs or anything like that is just kind of like seasoning. No, you're good at it. And it's like, it's a unique thing to be able to lose yourself in that stuff. Because like either you're going to go, there's guys who can act out. But like, but you thought of it as a skill you wanted to do when you were. Because like I, for me, it was crowd work.

It's like, you better know how to do it like there are guys that just can't do it the OR taught me that before I was very rigid and then like just moving through your bits part of the system

at the comedy store which you don't really see when you're a young comic you just kind of you fight it yeah they put you up so late like when there's

five people in the room and you're like why am I yeah you can take it one of two ways it can make you great or it can make you bitter and toxic where you're like where the fuck am i here's five people but then you kind of realize like oh there's zero stakes yeah it's 1 45 a.m there's five people and then also you realize they're here yeah they're sitting

like they want to be here like they didn't want to be here they'd be gone yeah and so you just real you have this epiphany that, oh, there's zero stakes. There's five people. I could just have fun and I could be a human being. I don't have to do this. Right. Veneer of a set like I'm doing late night. You can learn what you can and can't do on stage.

You can learn the parameters of what you're capable of. You can dip into the now. Sure. You could dip into the, you can just be three dimensional. Yeah, that's great. And that's a gear that I didn't have until coming to the comedy store many years ago it's important man very it's i i liken it to like a wild horse in water yeah well you know when they're thrashing around and everything it just kind of like teaches them to slow down don't panic yeah yeah yeah just before you're a wild horse and just you're a lot of people learn that on mushrooms but not really no i Really? No, I go the other way.

No, I mean, I was fortunate enough in my pain to, when I started in New York, I couldn't get on at the big club, so the only club I could get on most of the time was a place called the Boston Comedy Club, and that was the way the evening started, was with six people. You would walk in on Wednesday and be like, what the fuck?

It'd just be like five people spread out like, all right, we got a crowd. Let's go. Let's do it. I used to be terrified by that but now I kind of love it

and when I want to develop new material, I'll ask Adam at the store, oh, can I go up on a Tuesday or a Wednesday? Just late. Yeah.

Just late because then I can just be on my phone and I can throw out some ideas. That's a good idea. Because it's becoming harder to try out new stuff at the store because it's in this renaissance right now. I know that's true.

And it's packed and there's all these, it's like you, Burr, Joey Diaz, Rogan. Yeah. And then if I'm next, it's like. You don't feel it. I'm on the chopping block. You know what I mean? Are you though?

Well, there's this expectation. You just, they've been. But it doesn't seem like, it seems like your act is kind of bulletproof in a way. Well, that's, there's different things I'm trying to do with different sets. Sometimes I'm like, it seems like your act is kind of bulletproof in a way. Well, that's, there's different things I'm trying to do with different sets.

Sometimes I'm like, let me build and I would never do that like after you or something. Right, because you got to survive. Yeah, there's... Well, I'm not hard to follow but I know what you're saying.

No, I think there's, and that's the lesson I learned very late in my comedy career of like knowing what to do when. Yeah. Because before I used to chase, I love,

the thing I love about stand-up comedy the most is when something works for the first time. the puzzle of it yeah yeah maybe it's the engineer thing where i'm like oh something was nothing and now it's now it's everything i can tuck it away yeah right it's part of my arsenal now yeah right and just chasing that i love and i would do it almost to a detriment where maybe it was on a showcase and i'm like oh let me try this new thing or when you realize you have to make impressions first before you can.

And also, when you get good enough, you realize like if you drive it into the dirt and it doesn't go anywhere, you can still save yourself. Isn't it great? I was just thinking about this too,

like reaching a point in your career where you're not, you don't have to prove yourself. Like people know who Marc Maron is. They know you're. Sometimes. Well, not just that i'm not saying from like an audience point of view but just sort of like your peers and

industry like you are an entity right right you don't yeah when you're a young comic you're just like you're trying to prove to everybody that you're as funny as you think you are right and and things are kind of a threat and but now you can just be yeah and even you just trying an idea out it's just fascinating to watch someone so comfortable even if the idea is not right not developed completely fleshed out yet because it's a process yeah because i found things like all right well that one's gonna come together not tonight i guess but there's just something captivating about someone who's been doing it for so long yeah and i almost feel like 90 of comedy is just i don't

know this is bad ratio but a big part of it is editing yeah just some of the greatest stand-ups aren't like sure they're brilliant all that stuff but just being a good editor because your audience does all your work for you if you are actually perceptive you don't have laugh ears right right but do you ever have those bits where you like, they never work but you have to do them because you like them? Because you love them. Yeah. Yeah, I might have,

but it'll be like one tag. Like they'll already be laughing and it's just a throwaway for me. Right, right. And like maybe one out of 50 it'll hit. Yeah. And I'm like,

all right. That guy knows. Yeah, I'm gonna keep it. Yeah, it's almost like an inside joke. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So, okay, so you're doing a little theater in high school

and then you, what, college? So, oh yeah, so what happened was my parents were- You're already straddling your desire to be in kind of my parents just thought it was something i was doing right for fun when i'm a kid yeah but then once i i came to my parents and i was because i think i was 17 and i wanted to get on snl so because i just loved that show growing up yeah and i researched i'll

go how do people get on this show it was it was through they were all improv performers from ground link second city ucb or they were stand-ups right so it was like two paths and then i researched groundlings and used to be oh you have to pay money they're in la they're in new york they're they're in chicago i'm just a kid in seattle and you have to pay money and i just my I don't think my parents would be into it, especially paying money. And then stand-up was just you. Yeah. I go, I think I could do that. I can rely on me.

Yeah. I don't need a team or anything. It's just up to me whether I succeed or fail. Right. All right, let me do stand-up. But then, oh, before I had that epiphany, though, I think I wanted to do theater, you know? Sure.

And my dad was like, no, I'm not going to pay for college for a theater degree. So it just kept on getting more watered down. I was like, all do theater, you know? Sure. And my dad was like, no, I'm not going to pay for college for a theater degree. So it just kept on getting more watered down. I was like, all right, what about English? And he was like, no. And then I was like, all right, what about film school? He goes, no. So we kept on having this bargaining until I got to mechanical engineering.

Which he, that was always a good question. He wrote off on it. But he actually didn't like that I was doing that. He wanted me to be a doctor. He really thought that I'm just capping off my potential. Oh, really? That I could have been a dentist or a lawyer or a doctor and I'm just doing this to do this other thing. To appease him?

To appease. Yeah, because in my mind, I just wanted to be out of school in four years. Right. So I could do this. But he also wanted, usually they're just, they want you to have some sort of practical skill. Yes. And in hindsight, I'm very glad that he did that. Yeah.

Because I don't think a theater degree would have really helped me do, I could do what I'm doing without that. Yeah. But when you're 17, you think you need a theater degree to be Jude Law. Yeah.

Or to be Chris Hemsworth. No, weirdly, you just need a sort of natural kind of ability. You fall into it. Sometimes you just find out these people who you admire and say you want to do that, you hear their life story and it's all happenstance.

Yeah. Or just that they have a natural talent. They have a natural talent, but there is a big element of stars aligning. Yeah, of course. There's a podcast I like called How I Built This. And they'll just talk to people like the woman from Angie's List or the guy from Patagonia. And you listen to their, like how they got to where they are, it wasn't like, I'm going to start a jacket company.

It's never, it doesn't, the germ doesn't start from knowing exactly what they want to do. They just kind of float through life. This happenstance meeting. Yeah, believe me, I know. I had no idea that I was going to do a podcast or that. I thought it was done. Life is funny that way.

Yeah, if you're lucky, something lines up. If you sort of stay in the game long enough. But if you're, yeah, if you're in the pool. Yeah. You're around long enough for it to kind of align and bounce around until it narrows into a successful avenue. Hopefully. Yeah. I mean, I guess.

You've been doing this 16 years. You look around. You're like, well, that didn't. No. Yeah. That didn't align for that guy. True. Why is that? But look, like SNL was the dream, you're like, well, that didn't align for that guy. True. Why is that?

But look, SNL was the dream, you know? Sure. And I'm not doing that, but I'm still very happy. You could still do SNL. I guess I could. Neil Brennan got me an audition. Oh, he did? Yeah.

This is kind of around the time when the goat face, we were working on that. The troupe, the group. The troupe. Oh, troupe sounds so unfunny. You know what I mean? Just in terms of words. The sketch comedy unit. Come watch my troupe. The sketch. Troupe sounds so unfunny. You know what I mean? Just in terms of words. The sketch comedy unit. Come watch my troupe.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. We got a lot of great skits. Yeah. Yeah, we were doing that on YouTube. Go Face is you. Go Face. Hassan. Hassan Minhaj, who was on Daily Show and then now Patriot.

I've got Netflix. Yeah, I've watched it. Aristotle Atheris and Asif Ali. Oh, yeah. So we were all friends in LA and trying to make a go of it because we would see each other in auditions and it's all for like cab driver shit. But you wanted to go with sketch. You didn't want to do an axis of evil comedy thing.

I love sketch, you know? Yeah. And I think like just being a stand-up who does sketch, it's kind of political because this is a show I wanted to do a long time ago. But if you don't come from UCB or Second City or Groundlings, they kind of don't paint you in the same light. You got to come around the side. Yeah.

It's not a natural evolution. So I think it's kind of cool about this sketch show is that we're four stand-ups who I think do sketch very well. Yeah. No, I watched some of your bits. Oh, cool. But I don't think they were goat face bits, but some bits where you're doing characters. Oh, I see. Yeah.

Yeah. How many have you shot it's a one hour sketch special oh so it's just a one off but are you looking to make I would love to

you know because like stand up and sketch is just I think what I do naturally everything else when they're like

oh do you have a half hour do you have a movie idea it just seems like so much more work whereas these other things just come to me

yeah hang around with three other dudes going yeah let's do that. You know, like a three-minute thing. Yeah. It's not like a fucking. Exactly. It's not like a 90-page to 120-page thing that could eat up four years of your life.

Exactly. No, I get it. That's a comic brain. I imagine that's sort of relative to a math brain, too. I think that once you get all your equipment in place mentally to work problems out, you're not looking to spend a year on the problem. Yeah, I like how nimble you could be too. Yeah.

You're like, okay, I'm doing like an action sequence. All right, now I'm doing like an indie film parody. Right. You can really do a lot of things in a short amount of time. And it scratches that creative itch. And it's satisfying that it's not going to take effort. You're not going to get bored, really. But so,

do you get a full engineering degree? I get a full engineering degree. What is it? What's it? Mathematical engineering or? Mechanical engineering at University of Washington.

What is that, what is, what does that enable you to do? What are the jobs? Quite a bit. Like, that's a,

that's a big umbrella. Yeah. Mechanical allows you, because you'll do thermodynamics in there, so you can get into HVAC, which is like heating and cooling systems. You can get into civil if you want. Right. You can get into aerospace.

You can get into automotive, like Toyota. You can get into like JPL. Oh, yeah. You can do like Tesla, Elon Musk company. And what would your job be at those places? It depends. It depends. Like for me, I got the job at Boeing in Long Beach. Because your dad got you in?

Kind of, but in a very roundabout way. It wasn't because he was like super senior and he was like, my boy's coming in. Yeah. Treat him right. And just like a pat on the back. Yeah, no. Because I think my dad,

he's kind of slipped through the cracks of Boeing and he should be, there's this episode of Masters of None. I don't know if you've seen it. I think it dad, he's kind of slipped through the cracks of Boeing and he should be, there's this episode of Masters of None. I don't know if you've seen it. I think it's episode four where it just kind of, it shows a window into the immigrant experience. Like when you first come to America and I'm fortunate enough to have been born here. I talk a certain way. I dress a certain way. I'm accepted by America.

I never really give a lot of thought to this because it's my dad and you just think of your dad as your dad you don't think of think of him as a functioning member of society right but that episode really was kind of a mind fuck like uh and it made me think about like when my dad probably worked at boeing and he's literally from afghanistan and he's probably trying to learn english a little better or doesn't have as much of a grasp as it. I mean, he speaks perfectly English, but there's an accent and we're not as woke.

You're only as woke as the year you're in. Yeah. So the politics of him trying to climb a company and the positions he was overlooked for. Right. So it's kind of, you know. That's interesting. That's a very powerful thing to learn from a TV show,

kind of like maneuvering your brain to an empathetic place for your father's life experience. Yes, because it's easy to think of your parents as just these set pieces. Sure, they're parents. They're parents. Yeah, and maybe it's cliche that you learn as you get older that there are people trying to figure out as well. Yeah.

They don't have all the answers. Yeah. I thoroughly believe that my parents were just these people I grew up with. But it's kind of great to have that epiphany. Yeah. So, yeah. So my dad didn't have that like a ton of weight to throw around, the clout to say, see my boy and all this stuff. Right.

But what he did, he had access to to the rolodex of like all the managers and stuff like there's this proprietary it's like a contact list yeah so he could find out who the managers are in boeing and he says like email this guy yeah like they won't know how i got his email so i basically got a contact list of some people to hit up yeah and so i emailed a couple boeing managers saying hey you know i'm with a mechanical engineering degree from University of Washington. Here's my senior project. And, you know, just. Did you say your dad worked at Boeing?

I don't know if I did. You did. Probably I did. Yeah. Yeah. And, and when you're a kid, you think this is old 1950s thinking like, ah, it doesn't work this way, dad. I got, you got to know someone. Yeah.

But he's right. Sometimes your parents are right. Yeah. And I got a, I got an email back and then I got a conference call when I was back home. you gotta know someone yeah but he's right sometimes your parents are right yeah and i got a i got an email back and and then i got a conference call when i was back home and they just interviewed me over the phone and then a few hours later i got an offer to work at boeing in long beach and i only applied to jobs in southern california because i knew you could do yeah yeah because i was trying to get here yeah and what did And was it a good job? It was great, yeah.

I mean, it was always a means to an end. Right. It's not pouring cement or anything. No, but you could have stayed there. Where? At Boeing. My soul wouldn't have allowed me to. No, no, no.

But I mean, they set you up pretty good. The offer was solid for a new engineer. Sure, but the thing with engineering is that you get this thing called salary compression where you come in at a pretty nice rate compared to your friends who are graduating in different fields. Right. I was coming in at 62K, let's say, which is good for the time. Yeah. But year by year, your salary doesn't really increase that much.

And then new hires start making as much as you. Yeah. Or even more. But are there like hot shot engineers? Do you mean just the fact that you said that? elon musk is the only one really right there's not a lot of hot shot engineers but like like your job security isn't like there's a new kid that can turn this inside out no and if you are you're like you're very rare right he can make a plane without wings this guy yeah it's just the tube flying through the air yeah no one

knows how he's doing it yeah there's less rock star right i mean there are some of them but i think to excel in that field you have to really love it yeah when you clock out you're reading manuals and i think it's true of any field right the people who excel are the ones who it's not work to them so you're doing that gig and you're doing the comedy. I'm doing that. I'm engineering by day. I'm driving to Hollywood and being a ghost at every comedy club. People walking through me. Walking around the hall. Just loitering. Yeah, but you seem to, you say you don't mind that.

Well, because I'm at a certain level now where it's fine. Like, I'm getting up at the comedy store. Like, look, it'd be great to have a better rapport with you, but I'm not going to push it, you know, like before this project. Well, we're going to have one now. True, true true yeah but i i like the way that it's worked out i wouldn't have liked you know can i pick your brain yeah yeah well that's a different kind of person you know what i mean like you're not that guy sure i mean there's definitely people like that you know i kind of fucked up because like not with you but uh i i asked burr to do

that but not too early because he had sent some really glowing things about me like in print. Yeah. And I did this. He's a good guy. Yeah, but the thing is, I would have like limited interactions with him,

like never at length. Yeah. So it was always perplexing when I would hear from other people like, oh, Burr really likes you or he mentioned you in this article and I did this festival in ireland this vodafone yeah and the guy was like oh yeah burr was here and he was talking you up so it was just

like fucking with my mind like how have i not had a conversation at length with this man and and he's saying all these nice things about me yeah i'm gonna be cool to have a little bit of rapport yeah so then so then i got his number and i was like thank you for you know the the ireland thing and he's like oh yeah don't mention it and i was like yeah like i'll get a coffee and pick your brain literally said that shit yeah and and he's like oh yeah like he wanted to but he's so busy and like i could just say what's up at the store i don't need to i know i don't need to eat his. But it's just weird with comics is that we have this community where we see each other

and we probably talk enough. You probably talk. You're right. You're right. Like we're not the type to like set time. We'll see each other in the club. I'll see you in the green room.

We can bang it out there. Right. And maybe if like, you know, it's late night, so you want to eat? You want to go to Cantor's or something?

For sure. Yeah. Diner sesh. Yeah. Right. Right. Yeah. There's no let's get coffee

are you gonna tell me your terminal yeah right what's the matter you know it's weird though because it's not like we're busy but we have time during the day but it's always a little awkward when you're you know yeah and he has a kid and he has a wife so just and it was one of those like late in life bonehead blunders not it's all right i mean i'm beating myself up more like i mean i'll go like i'll go hike with Ryan Singer and shit sometimes. I mean, it happens, but it is kind of an odd thing. You got to slip into it. We don't like to plan anything unless it's necessary.

That's funny, though. Are you sick? What do you need? What's happening? If a comic wants to have coffee at a certain time. Did something happen? Lay it on me. Yeah, yeah.

It's going to be heavy. But when you finally quit your gig, I mean, is your old man proud of you now? I don't know. We'll see when I go back for Thanksgiving. He's been the longest holdout. And like my mom is loving it since I took her to the premiere. Oh, really? She got pictures with, yeah.

Like she got a picture with Margot Robbie and like Tina Fey. So she got to see the best of the best. Because I hide a lot of stuff from, it's tough because when you're out here, especially in the early years, she'll be like, you know, what's new? And you're doing things, but they're not, they're like an audition.

You're not going to tell your mom about an audition. It's the worst. It's the fucking worst. You can go through the yo-yo, like you're built for it, but your mom isn't or you don't want to take them through that, because then they just like, why are you wasting your time? Or they're just like, they, like, I just did a fucking scene.

I just did a scene with Robert De Niro in The Joker, right? That's awesome. Yeah, but like, I'm telling my mom, she's like, oh, so you're in the movie. I'm like, yeah, but it's not, it's not, because you know they're going to go, and they're going to wait, and then it's sort of like, that's it. But you don't know, you don't understand how, yeah, like, it's your mom it's not, because you know they're going to go and they're going to wait and then it's sort of like, that's it? But you don't know, you don't understand how, yeah, like to your mom, like, oh, you wish. Right, I mean, she's happy,

but like I know when the movie comes out, she's like, I thought you were going to be in it longer. You can't win, you know? Like one of the greatest things of your career, like I thought it was going to be longer. It was a good experience, you know, but I've got it all. I've got it in a good perspective in my head,

but I know what you're saying. You can't say like, I'm up for this movie because then they'll be like, why didn't you get it? Or they'll keep asking. Yeah. And you don't even know.

Yeah. I don't know if I got it. More things don't happen than happen. Yeah, that's right. So it's hard early on when they say what's going on and you have nothing,

you go, nothing really? I hate it. And it just seems like you're twiddling your thumbs, but you are, you're just protecting them from the yo-yo of Hollywood.wood yeah and also like no matter it's like and now it what really matters i mean with my parents there was a generation like if everybody doesn't know who you are then for in their world yeah tom cruise or bus right who who are you you know what i mean

it's like i don't know what is that show that you're on you know you know it's like jerry seinfeld we know him and then everything else is sort of like oh i don't know what conan yeah they don't know shades of gray they don't and it's like it wears on you a little bit yeah but after that premiere my mom was into it oh yeah it was funny because she wanted a photo with tina and there's a lot of people at this after party she's like literally pushing me yeah towards like i'm gonna bump in she's literally like a like a linebacker or something just just blocking me and you're trying to be cool it was crazy i've never seen my mom push push me to get to somebody she was like swim moving and everything and then loved it but was kind of neat though i was like it's my mom of course they're gonna take it it's so lovable yeah yeah it's not just some random guy like right

right i love you tina. Can I smell your hair? Yeah, and Tina was cool. Yeah, she took a photo and my mom, like she hangs it and. So what's your. My dad is kind of more, it's kind of, I think, a cultural thing too. Like what will people think? And he's just very old school. And I think it must be kind of novel.

For me, I like that there's other Afghans who will talk to my dad and be like, oh, you must be so proud. Right. And then for that switch to go in his head like. should i be proud yeah yeah that's kind of nice but i think he just understands money and like a house and cars and uh not in a gaudy way but just kind of stability right and what i would have if i were a cardiac, you know, surgeon. Right. He's still judging you. He's still waiting for that. Yeah. He gave this arbitrary number.

He was like, if you make $50 million, it will have been okay. Oh, my God. Just some random. It's a big number. But not in a mean way. It's just so absurd. I go, dad, I would never make that. Yeah, there's nothing you could do.

Yeah, what are you? So, we'll see. It's every year. It's like still like kind of. Here's the kind of cool and sad thing. It's nothing you can do. Yeah, what are you? So we'll see. It's every year. It's still like kind of. Here's the kind of cool and sad thing. It's becoming less and less harping and kind of like, I think he just always thought that I was putting my real life on hold. Right. That what I was doing.

It's a phase. Yes. Yeah. The longest phase in the world. Exactly. Yeah. Up top, it was just sort of like, okay, he can still go to medical school. But that's the problem with having an actual degree.

Like, you know, I have an English degree. So after about a decade, there was no phase, but there was no other thing. You know what I'm saying? It was this or bust. Right. There's nothing you're going to fall back on. Like, you know, you've got that other. No, you don't.

Okay. Good luck. But he didn't even want engineering, though. He wanted me to go to medical school or like dentistry. And so i was always putting my life on hold kind of in his mind right and early on when i was like really getting into comedy and stuff i would like hide my joke book and stuff and oh wow just anything that would remind him that i'm doing this thing would kind of enrage him not i know like like throwing me

downstairs and everything right kind of like um you know you know throwing your life away blah why is this still happening? Yes, yes, yes. Most people, it's opioids. It's the same thing, honestly. He didn't like any reminders that I'm doing this other thing. I think we were driving to maybe Lake Chelan or just some family vacation.

We're in the minivan and I'm reading. I'm just trying to like, I'm reading like Steve Martin's memoirs. I'm reading Jay Leno's Leading With My Chin. Yeah, yeah. So the book's open like that. And I just picture my dad looking in the rear view mirror and just seeing Jay Leno with his like chin on his fist with this ball of anger. Yeah, yeah.

He's like, what the fuck is that Jay Leno? Really? Yeah, yeah, yeah. So he was kind of upset about that. Wow. But over time, it's kind of sad. Just like time has tempered him. You know, you can't maintain that level of rage. That's not sad, that's good over time, it's kind of sad. Just like time has tempered him. You know, you can't maintain that level of rage.

That's not sad. That's good. Sure. It's good for me. But it just reminds me your parents are getting older and all that. But also like, you know, a therapist years ago once told me that, you know, at some point, you know, your parents want to have a relationship with you that's, you know, genuine. Yeah. I make it sound like he's Joe Jackson or something. Like we love each other we talk when but but this is just this side thing that we don't it's sort of

like professor x and magneto have common ground but right you know they still they still were friends at this point does he come to your shows no no but my mom doesn't either i'm very weird my mom i should yeah i just have hang-ups about it that'll go away she'll let that go away i should let it go away my mom really wants to come i should let her come it would make but my dad would be i kind of feel like for my dad it has to be this triumphant like out of a movie special maybe maybe my mom showed i don't know yeah yeah you should like i mean i know how that feels you know like and i was like that too but too. But my dad gets such a kick out of coming. Yeah?

Yeah. Just, yeah, I just can't fathom my dad being like, when's your next show? Can you put me down for like 8.30 and 10.30? I want to bring Abdul. I have a tag for you. He's already given you a bunch of tags. Yeah. I don't talk about him as much.

I mean, in my early days, you kind of talk about what you know, and I talked about my dad more. But that's how I learned how to be a comic. He's just one of those guys, he's so narcissistic and weird that I'll just make fun of him to his face, and he just dies.

He just loves the attention. So, like, I'll just, you can go too far with it. Sure. And I'm sure you wouldn't do this given your relationship. Yeah. He would charge the stage

and beat me up just a flashback. Oh really? No, I'm just kidding. Like he takes his shoes off and just spanks me. Starts throwing shoes at you. My fans can't see me this way.

I have the power. Well that's, I'm sorry Bubba. Yeah, but that's the thing that's in your head. See, that's why you can't have him there

is that you've got him built into your head and you're going to go on stage knowing he's in the room it's a very middle eastern thing just this this like power separation dad is dad it's weird i can't i can't like fathom laying into my dad oh no yeah i get it no not no that's uh i understand the respect but you'll have an event big enough maybe they'll come and turn like maybe like your mom had the premiere right but maybe what's gonna be for my dad loves steve martin that's that's what's interesting though like he's such a huge fan oh really they love art they're really tapped into it they love poetry and but they don't want yeah but they don't want their kids to have any

part of it like these are all just like artists flown in from somewhere right sometimes people will come up to you after a show and be like wow i don't know how you do what you do up there they think that you just woke up right you don't ask a helicopter pilot like how do you do oh fuck man like i wish i could be you how do you know how do you even like it's a process it's a hell it's a long process i've always thought about stand-up that like people think they can do it some people because on its surface you're like oh I've made people laugh. Right. I can hold a microphone.

I've sure I can get up there. Yeah. And on its surface. Sure. But when you look at a, an NFL player who's just like jacked and 300 pounds, people know, cause you could see the work.

The work is on their body. He's a monster. Look at him. They look at the muscles and they know why they can't do that. Yeah. But with standup, all the muscles are in your brain. Yeah.

And no one can see it. Oh yeah. Yeah. And, and I, I hate when people trivialize it like you know now everyone's a comic because they've done one mic uh-huh you know and they got a business card and so yeah or hecklers just be like yeah let me get up there yeah come on yeah you want me to everyone claps yeah and then you see them clam up up there i want to do this character where it's like confident open mic because you'll see these bringer shows.

Oh, yeah. Where it's like, oh, you know him from the die, theta, beta fraternity. And he has like some jack in a backwards hat. And it's like, and it's this fake confidence, you know, where you could tell, he's like, I'll just exude confidence. But through the breathing and like the swallowing, you could tell that he's just living on the edge.

He's like, yeah, what's up? Toby's in the edge. He's like, yeah, what's up? Was it a topes in the house? Fuck, you guys ever notice when... It's funny. It's just hilarious as a comic back there. You go, that's not a normal breathing pattern. Yeah. All right, buddy.

Well, this was good. So Goat Face. Goat Face. It's a one-hour sketch special. Comedy Central. I think Comedy Central has my one hour sketch special comedy central i think comedy central has my one hour special that was on cso it's up there now it's called there's no business like show business it's funny then i have a podcast called the he-man or dance hour good

talking to you buddy thanks for having me do it okay that was good. I like that guy. Funny guy, smart guy. Oh my God, I'm talking. I'm having a hard time recognizing my own voice in my head. So that's that. Go to WTFpod.com. You can check my tour dates. I got a few coming up that are on there at the Wheeler Opera House in Aspen and also at the Boulder Theater theater in boulder colorado you can also pick up the audio version of too real right there on the home page at wtfpod.com and i wasn't planning on playing guitar it's a little late i'm a little tired but i'm i think i'm rethinking it because i plugged in the telecaster maybe i'll just go clean why why why why why why all the cool guys are playing with their fingers. Just their thumbs. Oh, man. I'm going to do two fingers.

Clean in. guitar solo guitar solo Boomer lives! You can get anything you need with Uber Eats. Well, almost almost anything. So no, you can't get snowballs on Uber Eats. But meatballs and mozzarella balls, yes, we can deliver that. Uber Eats. Get almost almost anything. Order now. Product availability may vary by region. See app for details. It's a night for the whole family. Be a part of Kids Night when the Toronto Rock take on the Colorado Mammoth

at a special 5 p.m. start time on Saturday, March 9th at First Ontario Centre in Hamilton. The first 5,000 fans in attendance will get a Dan Dawson bobblehead courtesy of Backley Construction. Punch your ticket to Kids Night on Saturday, March 9th at 5 p.m. in Rock City at torontorock.com.