Yannis Pappas Hour - Big Bank Energy

Episode Date: June 18, 2023

We take a look into the corruption of Banks and blame it on the people who put their money in them. We defend 2008 as the tax payers fault. Banks are innocent. Yannis Pappas Hour is your new favorite podcast  Comedian Yannis Pappas wants to bring us all together by ripping everyone apart. Yannis Pappas identifies as a certified historian, P.R. Rep, social scientist, journalist and gender dysphoria expert. Join us every week to learn the future, analyze the past and defend the un-defendable. See Yanni do stand up, live  Dates & Cities below  All tickets: https://www.yannispappascomedy.com Soul Joel’s Pottstown, PA June 24 Boston July 8 Poughkeepsie, July 21-22 Long Island Aug 17 Salt Lake City aug 4-5 Dallas Aug 24-26 Springfield l, MO sept 7-9 Calgary Sept 22–23 FORTË Wayne, Indiana Sept 29-30 Red Bank, NJ Oct 14 San Fran Oct 27-28 New York Nov 4 Providence Nov 10-11 Phoenix Nov 16-18 Spokane Dec 1-2 Tulsa Dec 8-9 Louisville Dec 15-16 Toronto March 23 Watch Yanni’s stand up special: https://youtu.be/ArlCFemEDvQ Join our highlights page for highlight clips from the episodes: https://youtube.com/channel/UCfMy34qIYYy7XiRaHKO1ykw New episodes every Sunday and new bonus episodes every Wednesday at https://www.patreon.com/yannispappashour?utm_campaign=creatorshare_creator

Banks. We're getting into it. 2008, I think that was the greatest moment in capitalism. It proved that capitalism works, always will work, because a few people got very, very rich and a lot of fun was happened. L-U-1. Banks, do they look the other way when you're a criminal but you put a lot of money into their bank? I don't think so. I think they look the right way, and that right way is green because green is not racist. It's not evil. It's not discriminatory. If you got the green, come, put it in our bank. If we get caught, we'll say we wish we didn't let this drug dealer have a bank account here. We wish we didn't let Epstein have a bank account here. But while it's happening, baby, let the orgy of good times and stakes continue. Welcome to the Giannis Papasour. We're going to have a good episode today about banks. It's a long day coming.

It's got to be a really long day. Right before we start this episode, quickly, I just want to tell you about my date so you guys can buy tickets and come have an enjoyable evening in Potsdown, PA at Soul Joel's June 24th, Boston, Massachusetts, June 8th, Poughkeepsie, July 21st, 22nd Jordan Landing, Utah, I guess that's by Salt Lake City, August 4th and 5th The Paramount Theater in Long Island, August 17th Dallas, Texas, August 24th through the 26th for my birthday. Come spend it with me. Springfield, Missouri, September 9th, 7th through the 9th. Calgary,

Alberta, September 22nd, 23rd. Fort Wayne, Indiana, September 29th and 30th. The Vogel in Red Bank, New Jersey, October 14th. Sam Fran at Cobbs, October 27th, 28th. Sony Hall, New York City, November 4th. Providence, November 10th and 11th. Phoenix, November 16th, 28th, Sony Hall, New York City, November 4th, Providence, November 10th and 11th, Phoenix, November 16th, 17th, Spokane, Washington, December 1st and 2nd, Tulsa, December 8th and 9th, Louisville, December 15th and 16th, and the Royal Theatre in

Toronto has been moved to March 23rd. Patreon.com slash Giannis Papasauer. These main episodes are really just an advertisement for our Patreon where we take it up a level. So support the cast, join the Fediverse, enjoy this app. Now, when you start the show by saying

you're going to be having an episode about banks, you're going to get a bunch of people tuning in ready to enjoy some anti-Semitic talk. Not going to happen here. That's not what's going to happen. Not at all. Are you listening to me? YouTube algorithm, Google advisory committee.

That is not what's going to happen here. We're not going to sit here and go down that direction. We are going down the direction of why what happened in 2008 was good for people. We learned a very valuable lesson. The banks are innocent in this situation. 2008, there was a big banking crisis, purportedly, purportedly initiated by the greed of lenders

to continue to profit off of giving out loans and having security and knowing that the market was so good and there was such a frenzy to buy homes that even if they kept buying up, these corporations were buying up all their debt, even if people defaulted, there would be still more demand and they'd be able to resell their house. All-you-can-eat buffet out of houses. It was basically an all-you-can-eat buffet for houses, is really what it was. So who's to blame, really?

I think it's the people. The people who wanted to live the American dream because the American dream is evil. The banks are there to provide, okay? The banks are, is a gun wrong? Guns don't kill people. People kill people. Does fentanyl snort itself? I don't understand why there's so many conservatives mad at fentanyl. Does fentanyl snort itself? No, it does not. So then why are they mad at the cartels? Why are they so mad at the cartels? I don't understand.

I don't understand why if you're conservative, you're mad at cartels and drug lords across the border. Are they forcing that coke into your nose? I have a question. Not at all. I have a question. They're just digging the tunnels under the border, but they're not forcing the coke into your nose. They're not forcing the drugs across the border. The demand is, right? Do you remember when Michael Bloomberg, who was a Republican in one of his most shameful acts as a Republican wanted to regulate

sodas in New York City? He wanted to say no more big gulps because he got out there and he went, guys, hi, I'm Michael Bloomberg. This is my daughter. I shouldn't be making fun of... This is my wife. This is my son. The thing about be making fun. This is my wife. This is my son. You know, the thing about Jewish men, powerful Jewish men,

that are very smart, very successful, is there's a game you can play called Gay or Jewish Man. Because they come from matriarchal houses and there's just something where they're just kind of, they can be like that and then crush your nuts in business and they'll do it like that.

And it'll go, fucking, you're just, I'm Bloomberg. And it's going down. But yeah, I mean, he would have his loafers on and he was like, listen, everyone's getting diabetes. And this is bad. It's a burden on the healthcare system. It's a healthcare session. And we should regulate this stuff. Nobody should be able to get a big gulp.

And you know what Americans did? Americans rioted. They said, what the fuck? You want to take my big family-sized container of sugar water, of tropical fruit, which isn't a real food flavor, away from me? What are you, a commie? That's my freedom. If I want to spend half of my life in a wheelchair

with swollen purple ankles and uncut toenails because I can't feel my feet, that's my business. The only doctor I want to go to is Pepper. Yeah, that's my fucking business. And all he was trying to do was to get rid of that obscenely big American. Dude, when you get a venti, when you get a venti from Starbucks,

is there any part of you, is there any French or European part of us? When they come here and they order a coffee, like when a French comes here and orders a coffee, and they go, can I get a venti? Or because that's their language or whatever, right? Is it in Latin? And isn't that funny that we're supposed to be European pretentious with the sizes, call it venti or ponte or whatever it's called,

but then they hand you a big gulp-sized coffee? Does anyone need an iced coffee the size of a beer cooler? How big is the venti? It huge it's huge yeah i mean 20 ounces it's a for a family of six it's bigger than our heads combined it's for a family of six and then the big gulps i mean the big gulps were like laughably big it it shouldn't it's a crime it would be a crime to give a 12-year-old. It's a crime. And here's the thing. I mean, you're supposed to go, 12-year-old's personal responsibility. You can't regulate freedom.

Don't even regulate. It's like he's 12. He's a dumb 12-year-old. 12-year-olds like Jared love sugar. We love it. I remember going to the candy store and I loved it. Right? You don't know that what's being sold to you and marketed to you is cancer sugar

water, is cocaine for kids in slushy form. You just know it tastes good and you know it's refreshing because it's a hot day and it's got ice in it. You give me some fun dip in the summertime? Yeah. Oh my God. We treated that like it was Ozempic. Exactly. How much sugar is in the average Starbucks drink, you might ask? 30 to 35 grams of sugar. That's a lot of sugar, you shug. For reference, this is about 7 to 9 teaspoons of sugar, or just slightly less than the average amount of sugar in one soda. That's because you have to say no classic.

My wife told me they give you the sugar automatically. It's like the sugar in the McDonald's bread that you don't even know is there, right? Because they're addicting you. They know you're addicting you. Now, I don't know if people think that their reason or the marketplace or whatever is stronger than when people just give you drugs without you knowing it. But let me tell you something, you're not. Nobody is. Nobody is. The free market, laissez-faire capitalism, you're not going to be able to go, you know what, I'm just going to shop somewhere else. Why? Because you're going to be fucking addicted to that fucking

Whopper. Have you ever had a Whopper after you haven't had a Whopper for a long time? It tastes good for three seconds, and then you feel like absolute dog shit. It's like the worst thing ever. It's like walking to your mother-in-law's house. Yeah, it's horrific. It's an experience it's almost as bad as that. walking to your mother-in-law's house. Yeah, it's horrific.

It's an experience. It's almost as bad as that. I love my mother-in-law, though. But usually. Yeah. Great haircuts, by the way. Yes. Well, sometimes.

It's not easy to break up with your mother-in-law as a barber when she's in the same house. And then you just keep coming home with your haircuts. Eventually, there's just going to be, I have to have a conversation. Like, I'm seeing someone new. I don't know how to do this. But, you know, your cuts were inconsistent. You know, it's an interesting thing. Like, you know, it's addiction.

They're feeding you drugs. Why are they doing it? Because it's, dude, it's the best thing for business. Nobody's ever explored the fact that like almost every advertisement in every company is trying to addict you. They're trying to sell you on the need for getting you on. Every social media company

has turned their product into a drug. It's the fastest path to more money. And here's the thing. They are very aware of it. It's not like they're going like, whoa, really? So is that what they did a study and they found out that it releases endorphins and dopamine hits? We didn't know that. We didn't know. Cigarettes are going, really?

We thought doctors, it relaxed doctors. We thought it relaxed doctors when they had to do all these house calls. We thought just pulling out a camel and lighting it up right in the stoop after a doctor tried to do CPR on a dying 12-year-old with scurvy, and he just walked out tired. You could just picture him in his 1940s suspenders just sitting down on the front stoop

of a city block in Chicago, and he sits down, he rolls up his sleeve and he goes, and the wife, of course, because she's a good housewife in the 40s and 50s, you know, even though her daughter just died in the arms of this doctor of scurvy, of plague, she still wanted to do the good housewife American thing and offer him some jello cake. Would you like some jello cake? And can I offer you some iced tea? And she'd come out with a little, you know, even though the dead daughter's upstairs,

she offered him a drink, and he'd be sitting there and go, and he'd pull out a cigarette, and she'd just light it up for him. She'd go, thank you, Doc. You did everything you could. And then, ah, I did my best. Thank God I can relax with this camel. Thank God I got my lucky, lucky strike. Even the name, lucky strike

It's a lucky strike It gets in there This is your luck This was your lucky day Look at these ads, Jared These used to be legal ads A health cigar These are doctors

Look at that 20,679 physicians say Luckys are less irritating. Now here's the best part. Look at this one. More doctors smoke camels than any other cigarette. Now here's the best part. The best part is this was after they

completely knew that cigarettes kill you. Let the marketplace work itself out. Here's a good one. Here's a baby on a Marlboro. And it's a card. It's a fake Hallmark card. It says, gee, Dad, you always get the best of everything, even Marlboro.

Now you're going, why is it baby? Oh, because it tugs at your heartstrings. You see a baby. It makes you feel good. Just like I just got that text and it was horrific. It was like a horror story. And I thought of my mother. That's how the subconscious works.

And that's why advertisers work, because they are aware of our subconscious. You know, they can get you to believe things that aren't real. They're true. So imagine you're sitting there, you're coughing, you go, after you smoked a pack of cigarettes,

possibly you got high blood pressure, and you're sitting there and you're coughing and you just, you have this cognitive dissonance going,

man, it must be, God, must be allergies out there right after you light up a cigarette because the doctors, the doctors prescribe and say, this is good for me.

So I wonder what this could be. Maybe it's genetic. Maybe I inherited it. Maybe my wife's making me upset again. Maybe I need to go in and cure it by giving her a backhand in the kitchen again because last time I smacked my wife, I felt better. Last time I gave her a good backhand, the coughs just mysteriously went away. So it's got to be her.

You know, Eve ate the apple. It's really their fault. Cigarettes are the good thing. You know? For decades, people believed that. Because they're, you know, here's the best part about advertising. They wouldn't lie to you on the sign, would they?

Here's another one. The Viceroy's filter the smoke part about advertising. They wouldn't lie to you on the sign, would they? Here's another one. Viceroy's, filter the smoke. As your dentist, I would recommend Viceroy's. Is there any better encapsulation of the evil of the advertising industry than old cigarette ads? This is the fucking LeBron James in Sprite of its day. Yeah, it makes it seem like the dentist was paid off by the mob.

Yeah, and you know what's great, dude, is that study, like I said, I don't want to repeat myself, but that study that sugar causes cancer came out a couple years ago

and nobody cared. It's very interesting. It's very interesting. It's for some reason it didn't have the same effect as the cigarette industry. I guess because you don't cough after you drink a Sprite. You just become 300 pounds.

But it's not a cough. And sugar is so addicting that you don't care. Yeah. Oh, God. Well, cancer.net, I don't know if that's the best place to go, Jess. No studies in people have shown that reducing sugar intake prevents or treats cancer. Scroll down. This message has been brought to you by the Pillsbury Doughboy.

Yeah, this message has been brought to you by the Sugar Lobby. It's true that sugar feeds every cell in our body, even cancer cells, but research shows that eating sugar doesn't necessarily lead to cancer. Yeah, doesn't lead to it, but there's an indirect link. There is, however, an indirect link between sugar and cancer.

Okay, however the sugar lobby wanted it to be worded. And that's the thing. Then there's lobby groups. So all these companies have PR arms and lobby groups that fight with the legislation. They don't have arms because they got cut off. They got cut off, yeah. And so they go, okay, we'll settle with indirect link.

Good enough for us. Remember how long it took to take down the cigarette industry? Oh, dude, decades. Yeah. Yeah, it came down to a dame with big titties. Erin Brockovich. Wasn't she the one that took them down? Great movie, by the way. Yeah, it was a great movie. Who did she take down? I never watched that movie.

That was another movie with Russell Crowe, the cigarette industry, I guess. Julia Roberts it was a great movie. Who did she take down? I never watched that movie. No, that was another movie with Russell Crowe, The Cigarette Industry, I guess. Julia Roberts is very pretty back then. She was very pretty. She does have a horse face, though. A little bit. Yeah. She looks like she'd give a teethy blowy.

Yeah. Erin Brockovich, what did she take down? Who did she take down? She took down some industry. This is the part where the fans are listening and they're just screaming the answer.

And we have to take minutes, minutes and minutes to find it out. Pacific Gas and Electric Company, PG&E, involving groundwater contamination in Hinkley, California. Yeah, so there's another, and listen, I mean, you know, everyone in upstate New York has cancer, they're dead at 12,

because all these companies dumped their fucking chemicals in the Hudson River and they had to dredge it up. So, you know, listen. There is a connect. There's a connect, baby. There's a connect. Here's the thing. You can't always trust people to do the right thing. You can't always trust people to do the right thing because a lot of people

just live out their lives with trauma and they don't really know why they want to be dominant and rise to the top to be CEO. Maybe it's just because they want daddy to give them a hug. And they don't do the proper EDMR work to figure it out. So these people project their evil onto others. Don't you think the world would be a better place if everyone just looked inward? Oh, yeah.

Yeah. The solution is inward. The solution is inward. You've got to find God within your soul. The solution is inward. The solution is inward. You've got to find God within your soul. The solution's inward. It's like there's so much we don't see and we don't know. I was looking at this picture of just this forest landscape, and my perception was there's nothing here.

There's nothing alive here. And then I realized, oh, shit, in the frame of this picture, there is trillions and trillions and trillions and trillions of alive things. And I was not even tripping. Thank God I wasn't. Because I think I might have ended up in a mental institution. Thank God, I'm glad I was dead sober and had that realization.

Because that's trippy, dog. That's trippy when you're just looking at it and you're going like, there's trillions of things that are alive and I can't see any of them. How the fuck am I, how does anyone act arrogant in this life when you can't even see living shit? You ever see a tetrachachon?

A tetra-trachacon? What? The things that they say can survive in outer space and tetrachacon? Oh, I thought you were talking about a Mexican dish. No, or it's like, or Amy Schumer. I think she can survive in outer space or Tetra Khan. Oh, I thought she was talking about a Mexican dish. No, or Amy Schumer. I think she can survive in outer space

under any conditions. Yeah. She's a survivor. I ain't gonna stop it. I'll work harder. I'm a survivor. They came to get her. They gave her a reputation joke.

She's still out there hosting the Oscars. Hollywood don't care about that scandal. I'm a survivor. I'm not gonna give up. I'll go work harder. As long as you got blonde hair and surround yourself with the best writers, you'll be all right.

Dog, her joke, her unoriginal compilation was about three hours and 15 minutes. And what I like is it was a diversified portfolio of unoriginal ideas. She takes from everybody. It wasn't just totally jokes. It was sketches. It was movie posters. I mean, it was all around her. Oh, look at this.

She took a lie detector test. She took a lie detector test. Yeah, I wonder who paid for that. Brought to you by the Amy Schumer Lobby. I didn't know she took a lie detector test Guilty No she's not guilty dog She's a survivor

They tried to take her down She didn't want to be in the Barbie movie Because it was not feminist or something Look People give her a hard time But let me tell you something She is obviously Like one of the biggest social justice. Nobody cares as much about society and not themselves as much as Amy Schumer.

She's out there voting. She's out there talking to Hillary, getting to the bottom of what needs to be done. Writing books. To make this world a better place, To help disenfranchise people. She lives just a normal middle class life out there with the people walking down high fiving. She's like Joan of Arc. You can see her

any day walking right through Bushwick handing out sandwiches and turkeys like fucking Kwame Brown from New Jack City. What was his name? New Jack Brown or whatever his name is handing out turkeys on Thanksgiving. Wesley Snipes. She's doing her thing, dog.

How did we get on her? How did we take a right turn on Miss Schumer? Because I was defending her, right? Because we're talking about advertising agencies, right? We're talking about whose fault is it, right? Whose fault really is it, right? Because we're talking about advertising agencies, right? We're talking about whose fault is it, right?

Whose fault really is it, right? I mean, come on, let's be honest. If you buy a house, right? You buy a house, and let's say you're a... Let's say you have a temp job. Let's say you have a temp job. You have a temp job, and you say you have a temp job. You have a temp job. And you're also writing a novel.

And your parents say, we could lend you $4,000. Whose fault is it? Is it the bank's fault for saying we think you're good for this money? Or is it the person's fault for thinking that they can buy a house for $400,000 with a temp job, and they're writing a novel. It's the person's fault. It's the person's fault. How dare you dream big? I mean, this is a free country.

This is a free country. Am I wrong? Are we going to encroach on people's freedoms? The banks were freedom fighters. They were dream makers, okay? It would be like if jared now it would the year's 2008 and jared now was like you know what i gotta get out of my family home i'm getting paid uh pocket money from yannis pappas

i'm gonna show up toco Popular and see if they'll give me a loan to buy a four bedroom with a pool in Siasi. And the bank says yes. The bank says yes. Why? Because they're not racist. Because they believe in you. They believe in the American dream.

They believe in freedom. They're going to go, Mr. Harvin, you're going to play the live action Miles Morales. They say, listen, we know you in freedom. They're going to go, Mr. Harvin, you're going to play the live-action Miles Morales. They say, listen, we know you may not be good for it right now, Mr. Harvin, but you will 100% be the new Jared Fowler. Jeremy Fowler. What's his name? Jermaine Fowler. Jermaine Fowler.

He's a friend of mine. I don't remember his name. You mixed his name with my name. It's okay. I mixed him into one person. Yeah. I mixed you and him into one person, which from a distance, it's not hard to do. I'll give you that.

Yeah. You know, surprisingly, I think you're taller than him. I think I am. Yeah. You know what's funny? As I've made so many short jokes, there was a fan who said, I thought Jared was going to be shorter. He's actually not short.

I'm just 5'9". You're just 5'9". Yeah. You're pushing it. 5'8". I'm 5'9". You're 5'9"? Yeah.

Did you know that Michael Jordan was actually 6'4 and like a half? Yeah. He was measured for the Olympic team. Don't have him here, you say that, because he'll take it personally. Yeah. But he's actually not even 6'6". They just listed him. They used to list Charles Barkley as 6'6", too, but he's actually 6'4".

Everything is a lie. Now you made Michael Jordan grow. Comics who say they're selling out aren't selling out. Some people are telling stories. they're not their stories. I mean, everyone is full of shit. Except, except me. No. We're all full of shit.

Anyway, we're getting sidetracked. We're taking the long road to get to what we're saying. What we're basically saying is, what happened to the banks, we bailed them out because they were doing the right thing they were doing the right thing they i i don't know what you were doing why didn't you buy a house in 2000 why didn't we buy houses what were we making like 800 a month in 2008 why didn't we buy a house why did we go rent the studio why did we say you know what let's go to new jersey and get like a why don't we get a hype house?

We should have got our own like TikTok hype house and called it the Ditch Lab. And they say, can we see proof of receipts? And I could have totally showed them a $100 bill that Joel sent me from a Soul Joel gig. And you could have totally shown whatever was in your fucking saved bank account. Yeah.

We could have said, hey, we did one user-generated ad for Foot Locker for five grand. We were just pure Brooklyn trash. And I mean, that's good for us, and we could have got one. Yeah, and you didn't know Tim back then either. Tim was the one who was peddling all those mortgages.

I mean, dude, it would have been nice to know him in 2008. What was he, like 15? Just a 15-year-old kid. Wasn't he selling all those mortgages? Of course, yeah. Out on Long Island, selling mortgages. I mean, dude, it would have been nice to know him in 2008. What was he, like 15? Just a 15-year-old kid? Wasn't he selling all those mortgages? Of course, yeah. Out on Long Island, selling mortgages out of a van. Yeah, we could have gotten a mortgage from Tim. Here's the funny thing, though. A lot of people were. It was such a

boom. It's like comedy now. It's like everyone was in it, right? And he's talked about that. He's like, that's how he knew it was a bubble. It was about to burst. Because he met some dude, and he was like, what are you? He's like, I'm selling mortgages. He's like, that's how he knew it was a bubble. It was about to burst because he met some dude. And he was like, what are you? He's like, I'm selling mortgages. He's like, all right, who isn't selling mortgages right now?

It's the same thing with comedy. When you turn around and you're like, I'm a comedian. You're like, well, huh? You're like, yeah, I guess we all are. There's pages you can put shit up. You were just making sewing videos on TikTok three weeks ago. Yeah. I haven't seen you at any shows.

I was like, yeah, listen, I was on a reality show. It took off. and then I started just Doing man on the street interviews And here we are And here I'm just on stage They just put me up at clubs automatically I went on for like a year and a half I intimidated people into making me laugh

I do more public appearances But my fans don't care They don't know what good comedy is anyway And that's a fair point A lot of these people have fan care they don't know what good comedy is anyway and that's a fair point a lot of these people have fan bases that don't know what good comedy is anyway

because listen a lot of people eat Subway sandwiches a lot of people eat fucking Domino's like we said a lot of people eat McDonald's

they don't know what a good burger is either they don't know and you can't blame them and you can't blame them and I don't want them to know what a good burger is because then they're going

to demand a good burger and then the good burger spots are going to be too fucking crowded with fat fucking mediocre people. And we're going to have to wait for our good burger. It's like what happened to the fucking spot that was good. In-N-Out Burger, they all got to shit now because everyone wants one. The word got out that it was good. That's why we're trying to keep this podcast small because it's good.

We're a Lamborghini. It's not Friday. Only four of you who listen to Andrew Tate can afford to listen to this. We're just a great New Haven pizza, and we're waiting for Dave Portnoy to put us on the map. That's it. We are. We are. By Dave Portnoy, I mean Bill Bird, Dave Chappelle, anyone big.

We are. Please, Shane Gillis, respond to the honestest text. We need you. Come on the fucking show. At this point, I don't even care if it's a comedian. Amy Fisher, you blew off your husband's face. Come on here. We We need you. Come on the fucking show. At this point, I don't even care if it's a comedian. Amy Fisher, you blew off your husband's face. Come on here. We'll have you.

I'll take Larsa Pippen. Yeah, or I'll just do like Legion of Skanks and have Martin Shkreli on there. I don't care. If you're fresh out of prison and you can make headlines, come on my podcast. That came out of nowhere. He was on, yeah. No, no, I mean, he came out of nowhere. I mean, it's a good, for them, you're like, oh, that makes sense.

They have him on, and that's great. No, no, I mean, he came out of nowhere. I mean, it's a good, for them, you're like, oh, that makes sense, they have him on, and that's great. But yeah, seriously, the only people we appeal to are people who are part of Hustler University who can, who know good stuff. That's our fan base. Our fan base is one, we share, I went on the YouTube thing

and I saw the Venn diagram, the two circles. It was us and Hustler University. That's our fans. So from now on, anything that we make, just always throw some sort of subliminal supercar in there. Because let me tell you something, we are 92% guy. I want to know who the 8% that listen to this shit are. I'm a weird, there's a, I'm a weird, like, some guys,

there's other comedians who are good looking or whatever, they act like, and women love them, and they, like me, I have to become a woman for women, I have to do a woman character to appeal to women, because there's nothing feminine about me as me. Well, you know what they say. I'm a guy. If you can't beat them, join them. I'm so I have there's like a split whereas there's other comics who are just like can get everyone it's like you know if I'm as me it's like if you go to a

if people show up to see my stand up it's just me it's like 100% dudes and then if I do a more recent show it's like 100% chicks who drag their dudes there

there's no middle for you look there's two people in me and it is what it is it is what it is so the 2008 financial crisis began with cheap credit and lax lending standards that fueled a housing bubble. Bubbles happen all the time in capitalism, right? It starts out as a thing, then it gets hot,

everyone rushes to it, and then it's too much demand, and the supply can't keep up, so they invent supply. It's essentially that, right, Jess? I just summed it up for stupid people Right? Something gets hot Something gets fucking hot Let's do it in our business

You know, Hannibal Buress gets hot Hannibal Buress gets hot, right? Hannibal Buress gets hot Everyone wants a piece of Hannibal Buress This happens Hannibal Buress is not enough Hannibal Buress gets hot. Everyone wants a piece of Hannibal Burress. This happens. Hannibal Burress is not enough Hannibal Burress to go around. So a lot of people are missing out on Hannibal Burress. Now, they're not going to make any money because it's not going to work.

There's only certain things that are going to work. But the demand, they were like, oh, he's so hot. They all need to give him stuff. And he's like, I can't take it all. I can't take it all. So the industry goes, we need to make some more Hannibal Burruses. Everyone wants Hannibal. We need to make some more.

So they make some more. And listen, it's not Hannibal Burrus. It's not the real Hannibal Burrus, so it sucks. Nobody buys it because it's not the real Hannibal Burrus. But a lot of people's jobs keep going and they get paid salaries because they're finding the next Hannibal Burrusris and in the process they can completely kill art because they're looking for something completely unoriginal and it becomes a bubble and it crashes um and but it started out with something very valuable and so they ruin everything and then the pieces get fucking

all thrown together until fucking the internet happens and then my matt rife fucking does some scrunches and some crunches and he does comedy and he's a nice guy and he's good enough i don't know how great he is he's probably fucking dave chapelle who knows and then the next thing you know now there's gonna be a rush to find more matt rife's they're like where is my next fucking matt rife and then they'll find the whole bunch of matt rife's and it'll fucking be a matt rife bubble and then the Matt Rife bubble will crash because there's only one fucking one Jesus Christ Matt Rife. There's only one Jesus. You know what I'm saying? So that's essentially what it is.

That makes perfect sense. You know what I'm saying? That's essentially what it is, Jesse. Am I right? So it started out as who wants to want to buy a house? Everyone wants a house. Houses are good. It's the American dream, actually, to have a house, pick a fence.

Every time we go to a city, Jared goes, I can get down here. I can manifest here. I can see myself manifesting right here. I love doing that shit. Yeah, we'll be in a city. He sees the house. He's like, I can get down right here. You give me one weeping willow, I'll live in your city.

A little Zendaya-looking chick right here in the backyard, raising tomatoes. He comes out in his fucking comfortable slippers, makes a run to the store And takes off his house shoes But slips on his Mr. Roger driving shoes Get some Wagyu burgers Yeah, cook us some Wagyu burgers

Pick up some ice cubes in a bag Some shish kebabs on the grill Yeah, get ready Having a little cookout tomorrow Having some friends over Invite you over Having a diverse It's just every kid's barbecue from this generation

Is just gonna look like a community college advertisement I mean, they're so diverse, these kids You look at his friend group When he has a cookout It's just every kid's barbecue from this generation is just going to look like a community college advertisement. I mean, they're so diverse, these kids. You look at his friend group. When he has a cookout, it's really going to look like a Benetton ad. It's going to look like, is this a United Nations meeting or are these just Jared's friends? Why don't they have a Security Council vote while they're here? It's a good joke.

We don't appeal to a lot of people. Why don't they have a Security Council vote while they're here is a great line. But if you think fans are going to get it, you got another thing coming. Bleep it! Bleep that. And cover my mouth. I got you. It's truth. It's the truth. I was talking, shout out to Tim Dillon.

And he said, it's true, he says, you got things either big or good. You know, he's right. It's like, you either become Kia, and you sell a whole bunch of them shits, or you're Rolls Royce. And that was the example Tim Dillon gave me. I was like, that's a great point.

It's like, you know, Rolls Royce sells like, what, 4,000 a year? They cost like 400 grand. But, you know, Kias, they're just flying out, you know, they're shitting those out. Quantity over quality. It's know, Kia's, they're just flying out. They're shitting those out. Quantity over quality. They're just pushing those things out of the fucking American capitalist pussy like

an Irish Catholic girl trying to out-reproduce Protestants. That C-section of cars. Yeah. I mean, they're just pushing those fucking mediocre shitheads out. Waterheads. One by one. And they're good enough. A Kia will get you around.

LeBron drives one. I love him. Don't you love him in the Kia commercials? How many Kias do you think LeBron has? You think LeBron would rather be seen in a Kia? I mean, it's funny when you see LeBron in a Kia, and they're just going, hey, black people, here's one of your idols.

Here's something a lot of you can afford. Get it. Get it. LeBron keeps his rings in the console. You can too. Does LeBron actually drive a Kia? Now, if you think that Kia, the company, is going to allow that answer to be no, you got another thing coming.

Of course he's got one, but do you think he ever actually hops in one? Can you imagine? LeBron James. Let's be honest. LeBron James may be the most famous person on the planet besides Messi and Neymar. Right? So you got Messi, Neymar, LeBron James.

Those names, like the way he's marketed. Like he's probably one of the top five most famous human beings in the planet. And you think he's going to step into a Kia? You think he says to his wife, let's take the Kia? You think he looks at his mansion for his cars? The guy's got a mansion for his cars. How many cars do you think LeBron has? He does not have three cars.

He has 16. You think he only has 16 cars? He definitely has as many cars as many times he's been to the finals. He has 16. You think he only has 16 cars? He definitely has as many cars as many times he's been to the finals. Yeah, dog. At least. LeBron James has, I would probably say, 40, 50, 60. How many cars does Jay Leno have? 160? Seinfeld, like 100?

Buying a car for them is like, hey, you want a sandwich? What do you guys want to eat tonight? You want to get a pizza? They're like, you know what? Tomorrow, I want to go get a Porsche. Let me get a number four series Imagine him just perusing Right? He can't even see the cars

Because he has to look past He's got to look over the staff That takes care of the cars Go back up to that picture? Yeah I mean, he looks so uncomfortable He looks like he's being kidnapped You know when the camera stops rolling

He goes, get me out of this fucking piece of shit. I'm about to vomit. Get me out of it. I think, you know how like porn actors have like a buffer to keep them, blow them while they're off? I bet you like he has like a Porsche or a Lambo right next to like, when to get out, he goes, and he gets in a Lambo, just to keep himself fucking, you know, cool. And then when the time to shoot, he hops back into Kia.

There's only a certain amount he can take, and then he cools off right in the fucking Lambo. He gets right into it. Yeah, he's breathing. Then he gets out. He gets in a Lambo, and he fucking breathes in. He goes, never again. God, that was a nightmare. Fuck.

For a moment, it felt like I wasn't LeBron James. That's not a good feeling. He gets in the Kia, passes out. They have to bring him back with a Cohiba. Yeah. I imagine if you're LeBron James, having one moment that feels like you wasn't LeBron James. That's not a good feeling. Gets in the Kia, passes out, they have to bring him back with a Cohiba. Yeah. I imagine if you're LeBron James, having one moment that feels like you're not LeBron James is probably terrifying.

It's enough to it. And you know what can invoke that feeling? I'm no psychiatrist, but I think one of the things that could probably invoke that feeling the most is sitting in a Kia. Sitting in a Kia. So yeah, could you just picture him perusing all his cars?

His Porsche Porsche Lambo You know Tesla X Plaid Nah Not tonight Me and my wife Were going to Ocean Prime In Miami

Nah I feel like that Yeah it doesn't have The right feel But look at that sensible $45,000 Kia SUV I think that Me and my queen

That would be nice To roll up in that Yeah that's gonna be perfect I mean my watch Is To roll up in that Yeah that's gonna be perfect I mean my watch Is worth more than this car But it's gonna be perfect I bet you he's got Like a body double

That drives one Or something With the tint on And he's Kia made him Made Like it was part of the deal Like they have to have

Like what dude Who looks like LeBron Drive one Kia With tinted windows And then just like A loud speaker I'm going I'm LeBron James

I'm in a kia you see me i'm in this kia they don't live they don't lie to you in the ad it's amazing it's amazing how products can pay people who are actually the opposite of the product to market their product. And I always go back to that Sprite example because it's just my favorite, you know? I mean, he may be the best athlete ever all around, like ever. So it's just funny.

Like Sprite is just not part of his diet. You can't not miss games and drink Sprite on a regular basis. You just can't. You just can't do it. Anyhow. I mean, we digress, but it's all related. It's all related to the fact that

you gotta know, you have to know that LeBron's in the Sprite commercial to convince you to drink something that eventually will kill you. And if you don't, it's on you because of freedom, baby. And I'm okay with that.. And I'm okay with that. I think I'm okay with that. Because what's the other solution, right?

Some nanny state where they constantly look after you. Monitor you. Yeah, like an overprotective parent. That's no fun. A parent that doesn't let you sneak out of the basement door

and finger bang a girl on the steps at night or under the bleachers. That's no fun. Because if not, you would have a horrible life and there would be no fun. And Bruce Springsteen wouldn't have half his catalog. He would not even be a musician. Look, Bruce Springsteen is a multi-multi-gazillionaire and has all that music because union workers got disbanded.

Doesn't he have all those working class songs that are supposed to be the blues that music because, you know, union workers got disbanded, right? Doesn't he have all those, like, working class songs of, like, that are supposed to be the blues? Like, I'm just sitting here, no job, and now I'm on the street, and I'm kind of making me working at the iron mill. So, like, yeah, it's the same thing you said. You know, if we're going to represent capitalism, I mean, it's like, hey, not only does it foster innovation,

but the hardships of it, the dark side of capitalism, creates artists. Creates artists. You're never going to have Jay-Z come out of fucking a nanny state like Sweden. It's never going to happen. You're never going to have that. You need a place like America

where you sink or swim, where you get shot dead in the street or you're a gazillionaire. We can't have this middle nanny state shit. No arts board in there. You ever go see a fucking Swedish band? What do they got going on? ABBA? You want to go see ABBA? No one wants to see that. No, you want

to see the Beatles where they come where they couldn't even afford dental work. Where'd they come from? Liverpool? They crawled out of some fucking mud pile of beans and fried fish? I want to see Wu-Tang. That's what I want to see. Now, would Wu-Tang be possible

if there wasn't poverty and disenfranchisement and all these things that capitalism creates? No. No! You can't have a comfortable bed in jail and rap about killing a nigga. Absolutely.

Yeah, you know? I don't want to live in that world, dog. I don't want to live in the world of safety and moderation and regulation and empathy. I want to live in the rules of the jungle. I want to live in a dog-eat-dog world. I want to live in a dominate-or-be-dominated world. I want to live in a dog-eat-dog world. I want to live in a dominate-or-be-dominated world. I want to live in a jail basketball game. That's what I want to live in, where there's no carrying.

I want to live in a jail basketball game where carrying is a bigger offense than an elbow to the face, you know? Because it's the closest to nature. And that's what we're getting at here. Is that, you know, these nannies came in and said, hey, this is a time we need to really look at the greed with bankers and Wall Street and all this stuff and how they just keep going and going and going and how we need to regulate it, perhaps,

and there needs to be more transparency. And I like to call that victim blaming. and how we need to regulate it, perhaps, and there needs to be more transparency. And I like to call that victim blaming. I like that to go, that's essentially a cop going, so what were you wearing that made him do what he did? It's victim blaming. It's victim blaming.

They provided a service. Like, seriously, I want to ask a question. Would there have been a housing crisis if people didn't want to buy houses? Would there be a fentanyl problem if people didn't want to get high on fentanyl?

I'm asking you a question. You can answer it however you want. You can answer it truthfully or dishonestly. Because we know what the truth is. The truth is there would be no housing crisis. So why are we blaming these beautiful institutions, these altruistic socially conscious institutions that just want to

provide homes? just want to provide homes. They want to home the homeless. That's what they were doing. Essentially, they were giving homes to people who couldn't afford homes. That sounds like a social program to me. Sounds like charity. That sounds like charity to me. They were giving homes to people who couldn't afford homes.

Is there not a more beautiful sentiment? What's the difference between AOC saying we got to get people off the street and we have to house the homeless and JPMorgan Chase going, yeah, that's what we're doing. That's exactly what I'm going to do. We think that it's oppressive to check to see if they can afford it that's discrimination why would we discriminate against people based on their income they're already homeless they've been through it enough

we want people who have roofs over their heads that's essentially what it was. So this whole thing that happened afterwards, this is just some sort of like government conspiracy again of like, I don't know whether it's Soros got his hands on this. I don't know what to make of this. Maybe this is a Clinton Foundation thing, but this whole government sort of giving a black eye to the banking industry, you know, first of all, they bailed them out. That was the right thing to do, to bail them out with our money. That was the right thing to do. When a hero needs help, you come running.

Yeah, because, you know, like Dave Chappelle says, when a hero stumbles, cowards rejoice. Yes. And, I mean, it's just fun to watch him up there going like, what are you talking about? Thanks, Samuel Clemens. Now, get back to the dick jokes. You know, yeah. I'm like, what are you talking about?

Thanks, Samuel Clemens. Now get back to the dick jokes. You know, yeah. It's very funny to watch a man pontificify on life and politics while he's wearing a straw hat and an ACDC shirt. Yeah, when a hero stumbles, a coward rejoices. Shut the fuck up. You're wearing $5,000 Jordans, dog. Those words are not supposed to be coming out of your mouth.

Yeah, I mean, dog, you got on designer shoes you live in fucking ohio around all blanquitos you got no trump trump in your life talk about the baby in the hood late at night exactly one of the best jokes of all time i'm not talking to you british ai bitch so basically what we're saying is we don't want to hear about the bank collapse where you have spikes on your shoulders. Exactly. It's just not. You look like you look like your next Mad Max movie. You look like you're a road warrior.

It's still funny that he wanted to punch you in the face. I think it's because your angels were irritating his demons. That's fire. You should have said that to your angels were irritating his demons. That's fire. Yeah, that is fire. You should have said that to your friend. Yeah, absolutely.

Well, I got to say, I'm not like other people. I'm going to admit where I got it from. Okay, go ahead. Denzel Washington. I think Denzel Washington was the one that said, sometimes people don't like you because your angels irritate their demons, which is a good one. So basically your presence triggers

some of their past traumas that they're trying to put in their basement. Yeah, because he is, he's an arrogant, like he's, you know, he's in his final form. Let's be honest. Dave Chappelle's in his final form right now.

He's running around, I'm the greatest. I'm going to write books. And he's like drunk, falling over himself. Yeah, I'm the greatest. And he's up there on stage giving college lectures. They're enthralling.

They're intriguing because he's got so much talent and so much of that it. And his mother's really smart. She was a professor. He's a brilliant genius. Yeah. And he's the funny. When he wants to be funny, he can turn it on whenever he wants. So it's easy to get arrogant when you're that gifted.

He was gifted, too. It's not just he worked hard. Let's be honest. At 14? He's gifted. It's talent. Taking over the stand- that gifted. He was gifted, too. It's not just he worked hard. Let's be honest. At 14? He's gifted. It's talent. Taking over the stand-up game? Look, it's gift.

He did also work hard. I'm not taking anything away, but I'm saying there's a lot of people that work hard. Now, if you do work hard, you will make it because there is no standard anymore. Talent doesn't matter. But it used to be talent. I mean, people saw him. You're staring at him like he's just so fucking funny, right? So, obviously, with that and success,

I think you get a little comfortable, you get a little arrogant, and you just kind of go like, I'm going to do this now because people are going to listen. You are Dave Chappelle, so people are going to sit through your two-hour fucking lecture,

your special that should have been called Dear Trans People. They're going to listen to it. And I'm not saying there wasn't parts of it that I enjoyed, but let's be honest, it's not his funniest stuff. This is his, and this happens to great comedians at the end.

George Carlin, you saw the last? Especially then, I was like, Jesus Christ. Should have been called asshole. He was just like, everything sucks. Everything's shit. I thought he was one of Jeff Dunham's puppets. Yeah, I mean, it was just like a, it should have just been called grouch. It should have just been called surly, almost It should have just been called Surly Almost Dead Guy.

It's almost sad to see. You know, because nobody wants to retire with grace. I think Soder said that on a podcast. Nobody wants to go away. Nobody wants to open up that jazz club. I'll invest, by the way. I'll be older than you at that time. I may be in my 80s.

What are you talking about you're going to invest? You're going to open. No, I'm saying Jay Harvin's the jazz club. No, no, you're going to open. No, I'm saying Jay Harvin's the jazz club. No, you're going to open for the band. You know, it's true, too. I'll just wheel myself out. God, it's a nightmare to think about. If I'm still trying to do stand-up,

you know what kind of nightmare it must be to be a single 60, 70-year-old guy who didn't make it big, big, and just going to do comedy. That frightens me. Why do you think J-Bo is so happy that he got Jeannie Buss? Yeah, I mean, it's just a frightening thought. Just like getting out there and you got that old guy look in your face of terror.

You're trying to be funny, and you know that this is the only reprieve you have from your one bedroom reminder of your failures. Every day, you're just looking at four walls of mediocrity. Every time you turn on the TV and go to the bathroom, you become more and more cognizant of how little space you have in that little fucking fallen dreams apartment. All you have is that stage. That apartment of broken dreams.

I think we're making some good points here defending the voiceless. Is that a bad one? Yeah. Some people, you know. One of those microwave meals. One of those former sponsors. Listen, the banks are, you know. One of those microwave meals. One of those former sponsors. Listen, the banks are, you know, they're an overlooked victim here. Nobody cares.

They're voiceless. They're a symbol, really. Some people like to advocate for disenfranchised people. Some people like to look at the Palestinians' point of view. Nobody thinks about the banks. They're just as oppressed. They're just as shunned. They do a lot of good things. They would try to help the little guy.

They were the Robin Hood. Not the app. Look at what they do. They take your money that you put in the bank that you earned and they go like this. Taking this money and we're going to give it to someone else. Who needs it more. And we're just going to cross our fingers and hope that you don't want it all back. And listen, we can't live without that system, right? Because what are we going to do?

Keep money in the fucking mattress, right? You work at Amazon. You make fucking eight bucks an hour. Yeah, that's right. What are you going to put in your ass? You know what? A mattress can never fail you, though. A mattress is never going to fail.

A mattress is never going to close. You can fail your mattress, though. I've done that before. Right. I pissed in it many times. Right. Yeah, but a mattress is never going to fail. A mattress is never going to close. You can fail your mattress though. I've done that before. I've pissed in it many times. But a mattress is never going to fail you. Bleep it. Remember that bleep?

Yeah. You know? Yeah, so people are going, what are you talking about, Giannis? What are you talking about that the bank... You know what I've done really good in this episode? Is I've really been able to break this down for stupid people. I think I pretty nailed that. Because that's basically what they're doing, Jesse. Am I wrong? You're the smartest one here.

Be honest with you. You want to know about life shit? He's the most quiet. So of course he's the smartest. I'm telling you, dude. He's a smart life guy. But as far as numbers, he's basically fiscally retarded.

Yeah. He's mathematically retarded. You forgot spelling, too. Spelling, too. Spelling's the biggest one. But you read books and shit. So was that a good explanation for a bank run when I said basically they go, give us all your money, we'll hold it for you so nobody steals it or whatever,

and here, we'll give you like a.007 interest rate because we're going to charge the next guy 6.8% interest, and we're going to give him your money. They're just a mob. Because he wants a house, And we're going to give him your money. They're just a mob. Because he wants a house. So we're going to give him your money for the house. Can he afford the house? Doesn't matter.

We get a commission on it either way. Right? And if he doesn't, we own the house. We'll sell it to some other idiot. Or guess what? If the whole thing falls apart, you'll bail us out. With your tax money. you'll bail us out. With your tax money, you'll bail us out. All this time I'm eating steak, doesn't matter. I can't lose. It's a win-win-win all the way around. If this whole thing crumbles, you'll bail me out. And I'll walk away scot-free. And people will say,

didn't a crime happen here? And you go, did someone steal something off a shelf in a bodega? I don't think so. So I didn't see a crime. All I see is people wearing suits and talking nice here. I got to eat steak and you got to raise your family in a ranch. All I see is white faces in Brooks Brothers suits. I don't see no stolen merchandise off a Target shelf. There's no crime happening here, but don't check their jacket pockets

because you will find cocaine. So essentially that's what it is. They go, hey, give us your money and we'll give it to somebody else. And we cross our fingers that people don't go, hey, we want all our money back at the same time. And that's a bank run. And that's when shit that's what happened in 2008.

People went, oh, fuck, everything's collapsed and they wanted all their money and the banks got But we let that all out We don't have anybody, we keep just giving people houses We keep giving people loans, we don't have it And that's what happened In 1920 Jesse, 8 or 9?

9 I believe It's horrible, Great Depression That's when it started People get nervous, things dry up Yeah, so. It's horrible. Great Depression. That's when it started. That's what happened. People get nervous. Things dry up. Banks close their doors and people open their windows. And they go, you go to the bank and you give me money and the bank goes,

the bank goes like this. What happened was, what happened was, there was a guy named Jared Hovind. Listen to me. Great kid. A lot of potential. He told, listen. He said he wanted to be Spider-Man. Look, I watched eight minutes for this kid. Great kid. A lot of potential. He told, listen, he said he wanted to be Spider-Man.

Look, I watched eight minutes for this kid. I watched an eight minute set and this kid has the charisma. He's got the jokes. He's got the smarts. He's got the looks. So I'm saying can't miss. He has white women surround.

He's got white women surround them. He's got, he went to college. He's got great parents. I'm going, this is a fucking no brainer. He says to me, listen,

I'm good for it But I need I've always wanted I need to go out there I need to go Huntington, Long Island There is a 14,000 square foot House

With a tennis court Basketball court Sauna And chicken coop That I Just need When I'm living In this type of situation

I know That I'll be able To bring out the best comedy I can. And I swear to God, I'll pay you back every cent. And also, we're going to add an Acura ILX to that, too. Not only will I pay you back every cent, you can charge me more. This is how sure I am that I'm going to make... Charge me more.

Charge me more than what it costs. And I'll get you back. And they go, I can't lose. Can't lose. can't lose. Can't lose. So you get to live like a fucking baller for six months on your salary. They get to go, hey, we got the commissions. We're sending out someone else's money anyway.

It's not our money. I'm lending out Giannis Pappas' money. It's not my money. And if you can't pay it back, and then there's a run of the bank, and everyone wants their money, then Giannis Pappas and Jared Harvin and Jesse Scaturo will give me their money. Am I wrong here, Jess?

Sounds about right. It's about right. Now, not in all cases, though. Not in all cases do banks get bailed out by the taxpayer money because you have to FDIC. That's correct, right? Yeah, the Federal District of dicks. Federal dicks. Yeah, the federal dicks.

Yeah, they insure your money. That's basically the federal government going, if there's a run of the bank, we'll pay it. But you know, the federal bank isn't a company. They'll go like, we got your money and we'll give you your money. We got other money of yours. We got other money of yours and we'll

use that money that's yours to give you back your money that we otherwise wouldn't give you back until we can work this whole thing out and keep it going again. It's like asking for

a charger back that you lent to somebody. Right. And they're like, yeah, I'll give you my charger. Just have it back in two days. Right. It's like,

motherfucker, I bought this shit. Right. That's exactly right. It's a can't lose. The standard insurance amount is $250,000 per depositor. That's what you're insured to. So if you make more than that, that's the right. It's a can't lose. The standard insurance amount is $250,000 per depositor. That's what you're insured to.

So if you make more than that. That's the baseline. Yeah. You're not going to go over $250,000 if you have more than that in your account. If you make $251,000, tough luck, bucko. $250,000 is like 96th Street for white people. So this is a federal government. So you're insured for up to $250,000 for each account ownership category.

And you don't have to purchase deposit insurance or whatever. So you're just insured. So when you see a bank as FDIC insured, you at least have that peace of mind. When you go to Banco Popular or the Fifth Street Bank or the Sandwich Shop banking company, not so much. Yeah. Where that bank closes, the only thing you get is the lollipop banking company. Not so much. Yeah. Where that bank closes, the only thing you get is the lollipop. Yeah, not so much. And a pen.

That's why it's great to be a bank in Switzerland, because, like, you know, you know they got the money. Anyone who's going to Switzerland to put their money there, you know they got money. They have enough money and that, you know, they're never going to want to take it out because you never want to take unclean money out all at once, you know, because then you're saying it's unclean.

Suspicions rise. It's funny that they're called banks in Switzerland when they should really just be called illegal laundering, money laundering institutions. With chocolate. Yeah, with chocolate. And that's what they do here take this delicious toblerone and don't notice that we are laundering dictators

arms dealers uh drug dealers corrupt politicians uh corrupt ceos corrupt people's money and we're laundering it we're hiding it for them so the government of their country doesn't go, where did you make all this money? And we go, we don't have that money. It's in Switzerland. You can't go look at it. And the banks in Switzerland won't let you look. They're not going to let you look. Because there's different laws over there.

And those laws, and if you've been to Switzerland, it is fucking clean as a whistle and it's a beautiful place. That's the main signifier that something is fucking wrong. Exactly. It's too good. Too good to be true. It's the devil. It's the devil. It's the devil. The devil don't come

to you looking like the devil. Comes to you looking like Switzerland. Or a kid from Queens. That too. So drug cartels hide their profits by flushing them through the vast global financial market using various methods including internet, payment platforms, cryptocurrencies internet payment platforms,

cryptocurrencies, payment cards, and real estate. Yeah, they laundered. It's called laundering. It's called cleaning dirty money. Cleaning dirty money. Go, where's those money? Hey, I'm a real estate investor. I have a pizza shop.

Wow. You got a pizza shop. Your pizza shop does fucking good. And then you go in there, it's just dead. We had, dude, growing up in Brooklyn, this was like a common thing you saw. Italians love stealing, right? Because they're just criminal people.

So, you remember the place on 7th Avenue that was just empty? Uh-huh. It was, it was like on 6th Street, between 6th and 7th or something. And then,

of course, there was Marco Polo on Union Street in court. They're still there. They're still there. But Marco Polo, they actually got caught. So, there's an article you can pull up about Marco Polo.

It's too local for it. I'm not pulling nothing about Marco Polo. Yeah, well, I'm saying it. Come get me. They don't care. The mafia, it's all Russians now. You couldn't spell it anyway. Yeah, you couldn't get to it anyway. We'd get to Marco and then you'd spell it P-O-L-U.

Polo. Yeah, we'll just be looking at some Russian student real estate account. But they got caught. Their mob connections got caught. But, yo, dude, for decades, you'd go by Marco Polo. It's a massive restaurant. It's big. It looks like a cheesecake factory.

And it was empty all the time because it was just a laundering front. Anyone ask? Yeah, we got all this money from our thriving restaurant business. Yeah, we do our business in between 12 and 3 in the morning. Yeah, you go in there, there's just a fucking Italian, one Italian waiter with a huge gut and a comb over, like with sweat on his forehead and a vest and a black tie, just sleeping in a chair like...

And then you walk in there like... And then you eat the food, it's terrible. They like microwave some pasta and hand it to you. There was a couple spots like that. And a lot of these places Were mobbed on Because it was Really credit cards

Put the mob out of business Once you started being able To not have cash And you could keep track Of everything It just kind of put the mob Out of business There was no need

For the mob anymore The store doesn't have cash You know It's like everything's insured So you steal it Italians love cash Yeah And then video cameras

Put an end to that You know And then you know Of course you know of course Every generation wants the next generation To go legit Like the Godfather You don't want to get into this

Do something else But essentially everyone's a criminal It's just either legal criminals Or illegal criminals When you really analyze it You go what's the difference? Really, yeah. What's the difference between a bank and a loan shark?

Because a bank won't break your legs. I guess that's the difference, right? Mm-hmm. Like, truly, what's the difference, Jesse, between a loan shark and a bank? Yeah, they won't break your legs. They won't break your legs. And they're doing it legally.

Yeah, meaning they won't break your legs. And I don't think they charge you, like, loan sharks Will charge you A ton of interest Hey you can't go to a bank So what do you want from me Bank will take your house Loan shark will take your life

That's right Loan shark goes You want this money to gamble And you go I'm telling you Vinny I'm telling you this horse I got a good feeling About this horse

He goes okay Here's the deal I'll give it to you It's a 16 point vig Or whatever I don't know what vig means It just sounds good 16 point vig

If you don't give us the vig, I fuck your wife, I take your house, I enslave your kid, and you work for me for the rest of your life. And he goes, I tell you, I got a good feeling on this horse. That's because the guy's got an addiction. I think the thing that capitalism doesn't take into account. Now, capitalism is the best system.

I think nothing will ever beat it. It breeds innovation. We're all selfish. And then I think parts, we're complicated It breeds innovation We're all selfish And then I think parts We're complicated, right? We're selfish We think about societies So I think you need to mix

Mixed economy A mixed economy is really What will Is the only thing that will ever work Alright? It just That's it And that's what I think

Need a little bit of everything Need a little bit of everything Need a goulash of economics You need checks and balances, baby You need regulation You need refs You need referees You need You know You need You need a goulash of economics. You need checks and balances, baby. You need regulation. You need refs. You need referees. You need law.

You need people watching other people because human nature can get very complicated. We get a little naughty when we get a little power. And I think the thing that's overlooked is that people are emotional beings. We're not rational beings. Capitalism would work perfectly if we were rational beings, right? Some of us can achieve rationalism.

Some of us are born more reasonable. We have a different brain. Like if everyone was autistic, capitalism would probably work great. Oh, yeah. Because autistic people, it's not that they don't like breaking laws. It's just they're so obsessive compulsive that if it's the right thing, they have to do it. But they're not doing it because they're good. They're doing it because they're mentally disabled.

So the only hope for humanity to be good is if we can all be mentally disabled and autistic. We should all just get lobotomies and take the emotional part out. That'd be perfect. Everyone's scared of AI, dude, but isn't AI the ones who does it best? When you ask ChatGBT, it gives you like a full, well-rounded, unbiased answer, right?

But if I ask somebody else, they're going to give me a biased answer, right? Because humans are emotional. So I think the thing that capitalism, that it overlooks is that people are emotional, they're flawed, and because they are emotional. They're flawed. And because they're emotional, they're subject to corruption. But not only that, they're also, not only the predator aspect, but prey.

We're also stupid. We're easily manipulatable because we're emotional. You can manipulate people. You can lie to them, trick them, create illusions for them. You know? You can kidnap loved ones. You can kill people and have them say thank you. That's how the brain works because we're emotional.

You could be killing someone and they're just going, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, and they keep giving you money to kill them because they're unaware that they're being killed because you have appealed to their subconscious. So until you can enlighten every person to this at all times, it's always going to be messy. And that's why I just think banks get a bad rap.

You know? A bank, J.P., Morgan, Chase, just got in trouble and had to pay. Big Trump Trump. Big Trump Trump. They got in Trump Trump. Trump Trump. They got in Trump Trump. Not just Trump. Big Trump Trump. They got in Trump Trump. Trump Trump. They got in Trump Trump.

Not just one Trump, two Trump. They got in double Trump. They might have gotten in triple Trump. You know what they said? You know what, JP? They got the lawsuit and they said, uh-oh, we're in double trouble. So JP Morgan Chase, which happens to be where I bank. Where I bank too.

Where you bank as well. Which is funny that they said, the Zell that I was sending you, they said that it was a problem with your bank, which is hilarious, because your bank is my bank. I mean, I'm getting very scared for our country. You know, to be honest with you, I thought you just wanted to stop paying me. Dog, can you believe what just happened? You heard it on the phone. He was here to see, we're starting to become a banana republic.

Things are not running well. So I'm sitting there talking to them, and they go, the Zelle went through. It's a problem on their bank. And I was like, what are the chances on the same day it's a problem with two different people's banks? And now I come to find out that they're saying there's a problem with your bank, and now I want to call them back and be like,

can you explain that to me again and have them say it's a problem with his bank? And I go, you mean us? It's the same bank. But that's what they were telling me, dog. Hilarious. It's getting a little scary out there. It's getting people, the quality of things is starting to come down.

Standards for things are starting to come down. And no accountability. No accountability. Because I think society is starting to, too much mom love. It's my special. It's too much empathy. We're going like, we want, it's that French thing, egalitarian. You're like, we don't want someone to be better because that's oppression.

So it's like, it's all about same. We want everyone to be equal. It's like, that doesn't end good. Because people aren't equal. And then you would just end up with a schizophrenic bank. Yeah, you just don't want that. So JPMorgan Chase, who fucked up our Zelle payment, apparently also looked the other way,

and often banks do look the other way when they have a... A high-paying client. High-paying client who happens to be a sex trafficker of children. Bringing a lot of money into your institution that you can loan out to other people. It's a valuable account. It turns out they kind of knew.

Turns out they suspected. And they got sued. I don't know about this sue thing. What is this sue? Like how? Because here's the thing. I don't want to sound like an asshole, Jesse Scattaro, Jared the thing. I don't want to sound like an asshole, Jesse Scataro, Jared Harvin.

I don't want to sound like an asshole, but let me tell you something. I don't know how this is not going to sound like I'm an asshole. Get it out. But if you're going to tell me I'm eventually going to win $75 million, if someone's going to do something bad to me, if I can have foreknowledge of that,

I think I could look the other way. I think I could be a willing participant as much as I can. I think I could put my imagination someplace else. You could do a foreshadow of your future. I think I could play the law game if someone's raping me in the present. I think I could play the long game. I think I could look at it as a job I don't like. I mean, is that wrong?

No, it's just mind over matter. Is it wrong? If somebody said to you, Jared Harvin, you're a 12-year-old fatty boom batty, but you know who likes fatty boom batties? Jeffrey Epstein. Here's the deal. You're going to be sex traffic

for a year and a half, too. Maybe two and a half. But when it's all said and done, JPMorgan Chase, who was facilitating some of the payouts to you from Jeffrey, because you'd be getting paid. I think he paid them, too, right? Like $100 he threw them. I think Jeffrey Epstein paid them like an opener.

He's like, here's $100. Here's $200. Here's $300. You want a burger, some fries? Yeah, there you go. Meals on me. I think he gave him a couple dollars, and I think he used this account to pay some of them, one of which he called his Yugoslavian sex child.

Which in Yugoslavia is just called a child. It's called my wife there, I think. I'm joking. The joke was there, I took it. Yugoslavia is a great place, law and order, there's no problems there. Yeah. And it doesn't exist anymore,

but the former Yugoslavia is great. Hey, listen, that's where where I think a place that has The word slave In its name Slavic yeah Jokic is from This former Yugoslavia So that's good

So is Djokovic Those guys are champions That's good So this place has no problems It's perfect Well one of them is a champion The other one is unvaccinated I mean you know

People say we're the most The most lawful Organized places They usually Always go Serbia They always go Serbia. They always go Serbia. Anyway, so that's what it was, right, Jess?

So if someone says to you, Jared Harvin, you know, but at the end, JPMorgan Chase will be paying you in a civil suit $20 million. We don't even have to go to 75. I think you can go to therapy and do a little EDMR therapy and handle that post-traumatic stress disorder. I'll go to my therapist, and then I'll go into my real estate agent right after. Yeah, it's called cognitive dissonance.

Jesse, you couldn't do any little cognitive dissonance? You couldn't black out and go someplace else while Jeffrey Epstein was having his way with your penis? Because I'd just be thinking about dollar signs. Jesse would be going, my dick is just a brush. Just a brush. He's painting.

It's his canvas. Could you go someplace else? Yeah, what dick? Exactly. One more time? What dick? I thought he said wet dick. I was like, what, you into this?

No, no, no, wet dick. Oh, okay. My dick doesn't even exist. Guess what? I'll say wet dick. I'll get into it. You'll get a wet dick. Well, it's easy for you because you can't see yours. Well, it's easy. Okay. My dick doesn't even exist. Guess what? I'll say wet dick. I'll get into it. You'll get a wet dick. If I'm getting.

Well, it's easy for you because you can see yours. Well, it's easy. Yeah. Yeah. Now I can. There's a time where I can't. When I get to 225, my dick disappears below the horizon. Oh, God.

Yeah. My dog's like the set. My dick's like the setting sun. Yeah. But that's the thing. I don't understand this stuff. Like the civil payouts. Like what?

A crime happened. So you're goingouts, like what? A crime happened. So you're going to get money now? People want justice. And how do you determine what the amount is? Like did she have 75 million dollars in therapy fees? That's an expensive therapy. Did she take 75 pumps? Yeah, I mean, how do you calculate that?

The bank is like, what's it going to take for this to go away? That's pretty much what it is, right? How can we get this out of the news? But they don't, but it's still not out of the news.

Like, can they get it out of the news? Yeah, it just stops. Like, once it's done, yeah, yeah, yeah. So it's really a payout to like, yeah, just get it out, get it out.

Like Cosby was like, just here, take it, take it. A couple other comedians, just take the money, take the money, just keep it out of the paper. Solved. Here's a gag order. You can't talk about it. Take it, take it, take it. A couple other comedians, just take the money, take the money, just keep it out of the paper, solved. Here's a gag order,

you can't talk about it, take it, take it, take it. I've sold my house, here's your money, just shut up, shut up, shut up. Here's a gag order to say that by the time I gag you. Yeah, it's all hush money.

Exactly. I mean, criminality is kind of, it's the same anatomy. Criminals and both sides of the law kind of do the same thing a little bit, right? What's the difference? What's the difference between cops and robbers? What's the difference?

You're a good person to ask because you got cops. My family. And your family. What's the difference between cops and robbers? They need each other. Is that what it is? Is the difference that it's a symbiotic relationship like the Joker and Batman? I just wouldn't know what to do with myself.

You're just too much fun. Both of them are selfish. One of them is selfish for themselves. The others are selfish for their overall society. I guess, yeah, and I guess the difference is there's something in the cop that goes like, this, the prince, this is wrong. Or something like that. And the robber just goes, what's wrong? It's all wrong. And they're both, is anyone

wrong or right about that? He goes, what's wrong? Right? Because the robber goes, what's wrong? It's all wrong. Kid gets cancer. It's all chaos. It's all wrong. Because usually the robbers have been the one who have been scorned by the system that they believed in at one time. So basically they both started off as cops, then the criminal got wrong

and became a criminal. It's like that great line from the movie with the horses. Seabiscuit? No, not that one. Aaron Brockovich? No, not Aaron Brockovich. Horses, right? She's got a horse face. Doc. Doc from Doc Hollywood. Hollywood or Holiday? Holiday. Doc Holiday. Doc Hollywood is a Chinese food spot on 9th Avenue. That's a Chinese food or it's a

drag queen that reads to my daughter. It would be a great drag queen name. Doc Hollywood? Hey, cats. One step, two step, three step, four. Skin him a ring, da-dink, da-dink. Skin him a ring, da-do. I love you.

Remember his line? He goes Some people Want revenge for being born It's a good one Some people want revenge for being born So there's They have so much hate All they've experienced is

Fucking negative They've been abused And stuff like that They need payback They need payback They want revenge for being born Like why did you bring me here If you were gonna treat me like this

Mommy and daddy Why did you do that And that's usually No seriously I'm talking to you mom and dad Why did you bring me here if you were going to treat me like this, mommy and daddy? Why did you do that? No, seriously, I'm talking to you, mom and dad. Why did you do that? And I did the opposite. Some people do the opposite, right? You either go Batman or you go Joker. Some people go, I'm going to get revenge. Other people go, I am going to make other people feel good. Be what you want to see in the world. Be what you didn't have.

And that's what it is. And that's all the banks do. You didn't have the money. They provide it to you. They are the change that they want to see in the world. They want to end poverty. So basically, if you're saying the banks are evil and they're bad, you're basically indicting them for believing.

For dreaming. And that's what the American dream is about in the first place. So how dare you go against your country? How dare you defy your Uncle Sam? It's a cynical thing. You don't believe in dreams. You don't believe in J.P. Morgan Chase's dream

for you. Guys, small business shoutouts. We love to give our shout-outs to these small emerging businesses. I love small business, and I also love Brooklyn Cannery. Okay? If you don't like drinking them, you can take the can

and stick it in your asshole. You can do a lot. You can grow a plant out of the can because the cans are made out of recyclable material. It's all natural. It's good for the planet. This part I'm just making up.

I mean, don't sue me if it's not good. It's biodegradable and biodesaminizable? Yeah. Look, it's made by a couple of eggheads who care about the world. That's all you need to do. They're husband and wife. And, you know, you can only imagine the meaningful sex that they have. Yeah.

Do you think they still get along after owning a company together? Because that gets tough. They probably have sex in the rain. It starts out good with a dream, and we're going to make these great sodas, and we're going to start this business. We're going to live in Gowanus. We're not going to go work in Midtown. We're not going to be part of the machine.

We're going to start our own thing. We're going to fight the patriarchy. And then they have good sex, and they're like, it's all fun sex. They're studying. They're raising money. They start their things. I drink one. I contacted them. I're raising money. They start their things. You know, I drink one. I contacted them.

I loved it so much, I contacted them. I found out, you know, people are ordering, listening to the Giannis Pappas Hour. They're going to brooklyncannery.com. They're using the Giannis Pappas code to get 15% off. And then before you know it, you're using a lambskin as a condom. Before you know it,

they make a flavor called lychee lemonade that sucks. Oh, man. I actually like that flavor, so. It's not for me. for me yeah it's not for you but it is for me listen some people like it jared liked it but the other flavors are incredible okay you got como adorat cola amaretto ginger beer root beer key lime jalapeno and guess what the ginger beer 22 calories i remember the key limes like 20 something the cola amaretto is like 42. I mean, it's going crazy. And these sodas are so good.

It helps him remember numbers. They're stood. It's natural sugars, monk fruit, stevia. These are all plants. It's sweetened by it's not added sugar. Yes, sir. So it's a lot better for you. And a prebiotic.

They're good for your gut. They taste delicious. So if you're having a party, just cut out the fucking Pepsis and the Sprite. It's all garbage. There's no corn syrup in this. Stop it. Just go. If you listen to this podcast and you're hearing this, if you drink soda, brooklyncannery.com. Order the cases to your house. 15% off

with the code YANUSPAPAS. And let's keep spoiling this couple until they get a divorce. Yeah. What's their names? Macha and Lauren. Let's do it until Macha and Lauren become so rich they cheat on each other. Brooklyn Cannery, the soda that LeBron should sponsor. Brooklyn Cannery. All right.

This is, he's your namesake. Exclusiveautoshipping.com. Jared Z coming up the San Antonio area. If you guys have any cars that you want to move without actually starting up the car and driving it, this guy, he'll ship your car nationwide, whatever you need. He has student and military discounts are available. Just visit the website, exclusiveautoshipping.com, then fill out the form or just call the number on the website. Jared Z, he's a good people, came to our show in San Antonio. He did. He's a good guy. Exclusiveautoshipping.com. Chris Minetti, 215-750-3730. Here's how it goes.

Paper for paper. You give him a cash, he gives you counterfeit dollar bills that he made in his basement. So everyone feels like they're winning. It's not real money. Your check's not a real check. But everyone wins. You get counterfeit dollar bills. He gets a counterfeit check that he tries to cash to get real money from.

Everyone's committing a crime. The IRS doesn't know it because he doesn't have an address and he doesn't have a real business. It's called Manetti Financial Services only on this podcast because otherwise it's just called Chris's Cell at 215-750-3730. Who knows? He may be meeting people in random parking lots and buying history hyena signs from them for a living.

I don't know what he's doing. Okay. Then we got ForTheFree.art. That's it. Go to their website. They have music, and they're from Hawaii. Pretty much. Then we got Jared's future wife,

SporthorseFerrier.com, Sam Gubera, 864-200-9007. Now, this is only for a limited amount of people in the Nashville area Really small And even smaller, those who can afford a horse So an estimated 80% of equine lameness is huff-related, Jesse I don't know if you knew that

You know how many times I've been sitting around, guys I've been sitting around drinking my morning coffee and I go, what is the cause of equine laziness what's going on lameness lameness and listen i'm not i don't even want to know 100 what's the cause i'd like to know what 80 of the causes what's causing 80 of the lameness yeah in these horses when i lay in bed at night I think of aliens I think of Jimmy Hoffa And I think of equine lameness

Equine lameness What causes it? Well it turns out It's the hoof Turns out Turns out you don't have A great farrier Turns out your farrier

May be inadequate You may have an inadequate farrier Who's costing more money In the long run But is contributing To your equine lameness This is the greatest Niche advertisement long run, but it's contributing to your equine lameness. This is the greatest niche advertisement that has ever happened.

So I tell you, I have a solution for you. I have a solution for you. If you're in Nashville, like I said, and you're ready to have more money, you want more money, you want to be able to spend some of that money a nice restaurant and not on your inefficient farrier sam can help you out by hiring sam you call her up or you go to sport horse farrier.com and you call her at 864-200-9007 and you pretend that you need her services. But if you really do, there you have it. Okay, Manly Girlie Studios. This is the number one podcast network

that nobody is talking about right now except us because these shows are fucking blazing hot. Blazing hot. I've recommended these shows to zero people, and those zero people have told me that these shows are incredible, entertaining, good content. North Carolina culture is what they represent. They're really running North Carolina down.

I want to know what took them from Miami to North Carolina. Maybe a tax break? Well, no, because they would be opposite. I think you probably tax tax more in North Carolina. Then I can't think of anything, really. What I can think of is that the guy who founded, what's their conglomerate called? Manly Girly Studios.

The one who founded the studios, the network head. The network head. I can only imagine the network head of Manly Girly Studios. Parents, has a divorce, and one of them moved to North Carolina. And they said They said

Which one do you want to live with And at first He was living with mom in Miami And he said I'm going to try out North Carolina Because it's an untapped Podcast market Yeah

And she has space In her basement For her microphones It's just a better layout For the pod You know what I mean Dad's just got a little bit More square foot

For tinge He's got an empty room Yeah we will have to film Casa de Thinking next to the washing machine. Yeah, listen, right now I want to help Mom out and all that, but I'm all about my grind right now. And Dad's offering me a couple more square footies. So, Mom, you know, I wish you well. Here's the deal.

You got an open pad. If you want to bang dudes, bring them over in the hot Miami heat. It's all you. I'll be over there. I'll be over there tirelessly recording episodes of Ju-Anon to pull this family out of Kendall. I'm trying to get you out of Kendall, Ma. I want to pull this family out of poverty.

That's why I started Manly Girly Studios. We're going to make it. We all coming out of the hood. So go to Man Male Australia Girly Studios Buy their merch 20% off with the code Weppa Can you send us some free merch?

So then we can wear it Yeah they made a story Of a shirt that they made And didn't send it They tagged us They tagged the show Still haven't seen it I like the hustle

But it's like You gotta think more hustle It's like you know how You got Jared wearing Ju-Anon shirt You know how fucking great That's gonna be for the Ju-Anon brand? All right. We also got Jared's favorite company.

Tell me about these guys, Jared. It's only my favorite company because he hates to do the read. To be honest, I still don't understand what these people do. I still don't understand what they do. Yeah, I just don't understand what this company is. I mean, I don't understand. Who the fuck has a booth? What's a booth?

What do you mean a booth? Does anyone go to fucking booths? Have you ever been to a car show before? No, dog. I go online and I buy a fucking Tesla. I don't know what to do. So for people who go to car shows or go to things like Comic-Cons and you have something that you want to promote,

hit up DisplayPros.net. They'll give you a nice little consultation. They'll give you 10% off your first purchase if you go to DisplayPros.net. Put in the code What'sTheDealist. If you're selling cars, comics, pickles at a state fair, this is who

you want to hit up for your business. Listen, I just wanted them to make us a sign and they didn't. So at this point, I mean, I don't know what you guys do. Just make more signs. Yeah, now we have to get Ted Kaczynski's son to make us a sign, and they didn't. So at this point, I mean, I don't know what you guys do. Just make more signs. Yeah, now we have to get Ted Kaczynski's son to make us a sign. Yeah, we got it. Yeah.

All right. What else we got? Who's this? Oh, this guy got upset because we said his business wrong. I apologize. Oh, okay. What's his business? He's the new guy.

Oh, yeah, this is the guy in Tampa, in St. Petersburg. MA Insurance Services So it's Ma Ma It's my insurance And he came up with it When he was trying to find out

If dinner was ready So you gotta I love this guy He honors his ma Right What's his name This guy's gotta be Italian To call it ma

Ma Ma I'll tell you in a second. What's his name? I mean, I'm telling you, it's got to be something. Cavalevi, Cavaletti, Pacello, Pachetti. Let's see his name. My guess is it's got to be an Italiano.

Where is he? Hold on a sec. Do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do. We just got to know. Where is he? Hold on a sec. We just got to know. Matthew Albani. That's Italian, right? Matthew Albani. Ma, I'm starting a business.

Yo, ma, what time's dinner? I'm fucking down here starting a business here. I got a website going. I got a website going. We got a fucking logo. So it's MA Insurance Service. We can offer a wide range of commercial insurance policies, including workers' compensation, commercial property, auto, professional liability, general liability, and umbrellas.

Also, my mother makes a great sauce. Wait, hold on. My mother's sauce is not to be beat. Now, what does he mean by umbrellas? They just give you a free umbrella? Yeah. Umbrella coverage, maybe? Oh, umbrella coverage.

So he covers everything. So he can do all that. Listen, I'm not going with fucking, I'm not going with these fucking, what's the one on commercial? Allstate. I'm not doing Prudential. I'm not going with Prudential. These guys are out. I don't trust these guys.

You know who I trust? Matthew Albani and MA Insurance Services That's who I trust You want to know why? Because I'm a kid from St. Petersburg, Florida Now here's the deal I think you can be anywhere in the country And hire this St. Petersburg, Florida company MA Insurance

I think they're doing great to be honest with you Check them out at Maine Check them out at Oh okay So it's mainsuranceservices.com you. Check them out at Maine. Check them out at Ma... It's MaInsuranceServices.com MaInsuranceServices.com Or you can give them a call at 813... Or call them on his mother's

house line. Or you can hit them up on the family landline. The family landline at 813-260-0338 813-260-0338 If Mrs. Albani picks up, just say I'm a a friend of Matthew's, and I'd like to talk to him, please. I'd like to talk to him about his business. MA Insurance, down here in St. Petersburg, Florida.

We appreciate you, Matthew, and good luck. We got two spots open. We got two spots open. Two spots open, guys. So if you've got a small business sponsor, slide in there. Also, subscribe to our Patreon, Giannis Papasins hour where we dive into some of your favorite topics and further tear the world apart to bring it together that's what we do and uh who dropped out i'm just curious oh the uh the uh the uh god damn what's his name jesse doing the fucking

dr strange hands you look like you look like you practice for a drag performance. I'm just kidding. It's just Nate Linder. I'll just call them all. We'll leave Nate Linder. No, no, no. The traffic guy. The services guy.

The Rob. Oh, Beaver? Staffing Beaver. Staffing Beaver. Goodbye, Staffing Beaver. I'm sure we couldn't help you. I think we did a good job. I tell you, you should get into porn.

Actually, we think we got shut down by ICE. Yeah. And what was the other one? That's it. That's it. All right. Well, sad to see you go. Anyone who comes, it's all good fun.

I hope you get people to check your stuff out. And we really appreciate your sponsorship. And thanks for being a part of the show, right? Yeah, of course. Thanks for being part of the show.