Yannis Pappas Hour - Cold War Opening Ceremony

Episode Date: August 6, 2022

Nancy Pelosi travels to Taiwan for the Cold War opening ceremony and Yanni has some hot sauce for his general tso’s opinions on it. Shaun King caught in yet another scandal has one play left, Yanni explains. Tiger Woods puts principle over profit as great men like he & MLK do—if they got a little side strange big deal they are still great men, and Beyoncé & Monica have a “woke off” in the oddest most unlikely shared headline in human history. It’s summer, so prepare for a long day of sunshine and heat with a side of feta crumble! Wasdadealis!Sponsor Shady Rays https://shadyrays.comPromo code: longdays Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

And we are back on track. Welcome to Long Days with Giannis Pappas. A little bit of a snafu, a little bit of a Greek people time. We've been a little all over the place as far as the scheduling, but we're back. We're back to you on the Bat Channel and bat time that you are used to um bat the official bird of this decade as corona will be with us and it came from a bat a bat a bat where when you go order that bat you throw a little hot sauce on it. We're going to be talking a lot of Chinese stuff, so I brought some hot sauce today to put out my general so's opinions.

Jared Harvin's with us. Jesse Scaturo's with us. We got a lot to get to. Sean King, he bought a show dog and returned it. And, Jared, what did you say that was? Buying a dog and selling a dog are what? Buying the dog of that breed is the white thing, but selling it back for the money is the black thing.

Is he black? Is he white? He doubled him to yeah, yeah, yeah. Alex Jones. Alex Jones is in court right now still for this. Why do trials take so long? How many years is Alex Jones going to be in civil court over just reporting the truth? The truth that those Sandy Hook kids were crisis actors.

And this was a plot by the Robot Reptilian Clinton Foundation soldiers. I mean, the kid gets to the truth. Are we going to prosecute people for getting to the truth? We got a lot to talk about about Alex Jones, or as he's called in a lot of places in this country, the new Walter Cronkite. Beyonce and Monica Lewinsky. I never thought I'd ever say those two names in the same story,

but wokeness makes for strange bedfellows. They're having a woke war right now, and we're getting all into it, and Demi Lovato is still trying to be relevant. Tiger Woods, a man of principle? Okay, when it comes to his relationships, he's a man of principle? Okay, when it comes to his relationships, he's a man of his cock. But when it comes to where he's going to tee off,

he wants to know how the human rights record of that regime is. Because, baby, he turned down a lot of money. Let me tell you right now, if somebody offered me the amount of money that was offered to Tiger Woods by the Saudi Arabians, I'd kill both of you guys. This is long days. Let's find out what's the dollars. All right, we got a lot of fun ones today. Okay? All right, we got a lot of fun ones today, okay? I want to thank everybody first and foremost for your reviews and your ratings on Apple and Spotify. A lot of shirts were sent out. You got your shirts.

Some of you, you didn't give me your address. A few of you, I asked for the address. A few of them, I just let it go. It's Darwinwinism baby if you forget your address what do you want me to do I got a certain amount of shirts and I got a ton of requests we still have a few left I'll pick a few not everyone's gonna get a shirt but go over leave your review and your rating at apple or spotify uh screenshot it send me uh your address and your name in the United States,

and I'll send you the rest of these shirts, whatever size we have, you'll get. There's a few left, and some of you will still get shirts. They're going out, and then we're done. We're done. Otherwise, even if you don't get a shirt, go rate and review it. Also, I really want to say you guys got to come over to the Fediverse. We need people to join the Fediverse at patreon.com slash Yanni Longdays, where we really, really get into it over there.

Those are some of the funniest episodes of Longdays cooking. And they're over there beyond the wall, okay? Over there in Quebec, the Quebec of comedy content, beyond the northern wall over at Patreon. So support the show. Go get your content and your goodies and become a member of this cult. We got to start a cult. I got to start.

We're going to make this either religious or political. I got to do something. I got to stop being so genuine. I got to be more one-dimensional. Okay? I got to start hiding my flaws more like marketers do. I can't just come out and admit that I'm a cigarette that causes cancer. I can't keep saying I'm an idiot.

I got to say Yachty is the Greek genius, baby. People who market well know how to just become very one-dimensional. They put out a brand version of themselves and people fucking love it, baby. They love cigarettes. They don't even care if it's bad for you. They just want you to be one-dimensional. I got to stop being so three-dimensional.

We're going to start doing this as a cartoon to make me more one-dimensional. We're just going to animate this and I won't be three-dimensional anymore. It'll be one-dimensional. So go over there and I don't want you to see any of my flaws anymore. There'll be no more tweets, just jokes. I'm going to follow the China model of marketing and propaganda.

We're the best. The Chinese model is the best. We handled the pandemic the best. Maybe we created it, but we handled it the best. The Chinese model is the best. We handled the pandemic the best. Maybe we created it, but we handled it the best. Okay. Nobody cares if we created it, if you handle it well, right? Like Jared pointed out, it's like when you, when you, when you're recruiting prostitutes for your harem or whatever your harem is, you know, you give them a bandaid. And what you emphasize is it was you that gave them the bandaid. You want to gloss over the fact that you're the one that punched her in the eye.

A little Stockholm syndrome. President Z is good at that. The CCP, they're good at that. president z is good at that the ccp they're good at that welcome to the cold war gen i gen z millennials welcome to the cold war this one is serious i think we how funny is it that the cold war was officially started this was like like the opening ceremonies of the new Cold War was Nancy Pelosi and her two bombs landing in Taiwan. Yeah. Okay?

That's why they were so threatened. She was coming in there with two bombs in her shirt. Reenacted. She's got big-ass fucking bombs. If they sent someone a little more flat-chested, maybe there wouldn't be military drills going on but it was kind of like the opening ceremony it was kind of like nancy pelosi and her bombs leading in taiwan was the opening ceremony of the new cold war and this one is

i think a lot scarier than the previous Cold War against Russia, which, you know, we got kind of close with Cuba, the Cuban Missile Crisis. But Russia was kind of a paper tagger, right? I mean, Khrushchev was a drunk. He was like a Russian stereotype. The guy would show up like, he was like slobbing his words. stereotype the guy would show him like he was like slobbing his words and um they had a pure communist system that kind of wasn't sustainable uh you know when you're when you're when basically this the the state is collecting everyone's money there's no motivation there's no markets

there's not a multi-pronged approach to a buildup to take over the world, which is what communism wants to do. We want to do the same thing. We kind of want to take over the world for freedom and democracy. Now you got to make a choice. Dare I say a binary choice. In a non-binary world,

when you pull back all the way, which is what you got to do during a Cold War now, it's, hey, listen, either your team America or your team CCP red China. That's it. There's no in between. This is a binary choice that you're going to have to make going forward. Either you're going to have to say America's the good guys or you're going to have to say China's the good guys. There's no in between. We don't got time. I don't want to hear any of that. Yeah, but the Gulf of Tonkin. Yeah, but Hunter Biden's laptop. Yeah, but Martin Luther King, Chan, his wife. Yeah. But Abraham Lincoln didn't have, uh,

you know, progressive slave, uh, progressive opinions about slavery. And yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

It ain't the time for that. Yeah. But also men can get pregnant. It's time for you to shut the fuck up. It's time for you to shut the fuck up. Cause we're pulling back. We're pulling back further. We're getting into a comic book world again where we got good guys and bad guys. People

who represent the rule of law, democracy, term limits, capitalism, which is the freedom to make a couple of bucks. Okay. I know you hate Elon Musk. I don't want to hear it. I don't want to hear it. You want to know why? He lives in the fucking red, white, and blue, baby. He also single-handedly pushed the auto industry past oil. He also fucking gave the Ukrainians

the internet. So I understand his father likes to shop for his pussy within the family. I get it. But that's got nothing to do. He doesn't even like his son. So why are we reporting on Errol?

Now granted, I'm very happy that someone did interview him because it was a very entertaining interview where Errol, Errol Musk, who's a complete asshole. I mean, talk about the opposite of father of the year just basically in his interview uh just says yeah elon musk is a loser i like my youngest son more um he's a total loser i'm glad that that interview is out there because it's entertaining. I wonder what issues Elon has from that. He's obviously emulating his father because his father's got like 100 gigs like Genghis Khan.

His father, I think, was on record as saying the only point to life is to reproduce, and I think he took it a little too far. Sort of like gender theory. He's like the gender theory of reproducing. Went a little too far. I mean, when you bang your own stepdaughter, you're in Woody Allen territory, my friend.

Okay? You're going a little too far. And obviously, Elon Musk. What does Elon Musk have? Nine kids at this point with like three, four different women or whatever? Who knows? Maybe at this point, one of them's an AI. Who knows? but they're

taking it a little too far so obviously the apple doesn't fall far from the tree um because he's kind of emulating his father in that way but there's obviously some issues here and i based on this interview i'm gonna guess that errol and elon mus Elon Musk's former model mom are not on good terms. I'm going to guess that it wasn't an amicable split because she hangs out with Elon and goes to events as his date, which is hilarious because he's got like nine women he impregnated to choose from to be his date, and he just takes his mom. I mean, the man could care less about

relationships he he uses women as birthing machines he might even call them birthing machine one two he may he may name the women he's impregnated like he does his teslas model s model y and model three and he's got them based on affordability, too. He's like, that one was a little bit, that one cost me a few more dinners. This one, I just took the Chick-fil-A and I fucked her. That's the Model 3. It's affordable for everybody. But his mom was a piece.

And his mom and him, he, she's the, he's the apple of his mom's eye. But I think he is the rotten dead cockroach on the floor in his dad's eye. His dad is not a fan of Elon, which was, that's got to hurt a little bit, right? Even when you got a couple billion dollars. He sounds jealous. You think he's a little jealous? Fuck yeah. He's a little competitive because he was like a big money guy, right?

His son's the richest guy in the world. his son's the richest guy in the world his son's the richest guy in the world and here's the thing people are trying to criticize elon based on what his father's saying but really getting to know his father makes elon look better it's like standing next to a fat chick in a photo. You know? You're going like, you can even be a little overweight, and you're like, oh, I'm looking at the hot one.

That's an old trick women use. You know, you always notice, like, there'll be, like, beautiful chicks will always have, like, three... Studfishes. Three, three... What'd you call them? Studfish? Studfish.

Yeah, that's what it's called. I like to call them special, special weight needed women special image enhancers special image enhanced women um it's an old trick beautiful women use and you know if you put elon musk next to errol he seems like jesus. I mean, Errol is a real old prick. He's a fucking prick. You can see it in his goddamn face. He's a prick.

Okay, knocking up your 30-something-year-old stepdaughter is a prick move. He also had like a diamond mine at some point, right? Yeah. I think so. Yeah. I heard that. Yeah, I'm sure he gave those people who worked at the mine an hour off for lunch. A South African. A South African gold mine. Yeah. I think so. Yeah. I'm sure he gave those people who worked at the mine an hour off for lunch. A South African.

A South African gold mine. Yeah. I'm sure he walked in. He goes, whoa, whoa, whoa. You guys are working too hard. We want to make sure morale here at the Errol Musk diamond mine is good. Yeah. Let's make sure they all have dental.

Yeah. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. I didn't know a lot of you only had one hand. Who cut your hand off? I didn't approve of that. What happened? They said you were working too slow, so they cut your hand off? Or they caught you trying to steal some of the diamonds that belong to me,

but they don't belong to me because I'm here raping the continent's resources, and one of these warlords cut your hand off? I didn't approve of that. Wink, wink to my overseer. Wink, wink. Can Ier. Wink, wink. Can I get you guys some sun chips? I'm sure the company wasn't run like the Huffington Post. I'm sure there wasn't standing desks in a nap room. I'm sure there wasn't a bodega cooler full of free fuse energy drinks. I'm positive.

Ping pong table? I'm sure there was no ping pong table. Sign up for the nap room. Oh no. I'm sure. There was no espresso machines. There was no espresso machines. But they did kidnap your daughter if you refused to work. Yeah. Yeah. And you know,

he did, he did. He was surprised when he saw some kids walking around. He goes, wait a second, son. Are you 12? Hmm. How did you get a job here? You're 12? I didn't know anything about that.

Wait, this is a whole legion of miners over here, and there are seven? That can't be legal here in Cameroon. Let me go speak to the local dictator and find out what we can do to make sure we make your working environment a little bit more pleasant. Would you like some sun chips, son? How much are you getting paid? Wow, you got paid nothing?

We're going to fix that. How about some SunChips? How about a pack of SunChips? Are we good? So Elon Musk probably just seems like the greatest guy when you put him next to him. But my point is, no more of this. Now we got to start looking at the world.

It's time for American flags. It's time for America. It is time for America to rise up like the Phoenix out of the riot ashes of all the previous summers, you know, rise up out of all the aborted fetuses like the Phoenix and fight the red giant once again. Because that is what President Xi, or as I like to call him, should we just test to see how in bed Google is with the CCP?

Winnie the Pooh. Winnie the Pooh. Look, you Winnie the Pooh. Winnie the Pooh. Look, you Winnie the Pooh-looking motherfucker. If I'm not here for the next episode, you know why. You're not allowed to call him Winnie the Pooh. And by the way, he doesn't look anything like Winnie the Pooh. No. He doesn't look anything like Winnie the Pooh.

I don't understand. No, you don't see it? Maybe a little bit. Maybe a little bit. You definitely don't like Winnie the Pooh to those Uyghur Muslims. I can tell you that. It's not a soft-colored teddy bear? No.

Well, the only reason he looks like Winnie the Pooh, I think, is a little racist, right? I mean, it's the color of Winnie the Pooh. What? The color of Winnie the Pooh. What do you mean by that? Well, I just can't help but notice that the cartoon Winnie the Pooh is a goldish color.

How would you say that? Yeah, I mean, it's a little. Maybe they have a point, right? Like, you shouldn't call me Winnie the Pooh because Winnie the Pooh is yellow. So that's a little weird. Well, you know, they do like bears in China. And Winnie the Pooh, his color is yellow and red, just like the flag. So there you go. It's like the flag. There you go.

It's like the flag. That makes sense. Yeah, they got pandas over there. They always got cute, cuddly pandas. And he always has his hand in a pot of honey. In this case, the pot is filled with COVID. It's filled with COVID that he's handing out. He's giving it to everyone and then he's saying, I solved it. Yes. Yeah. Like a

pimp with his hose um so we're in the cold war baby this is a cold war era nancy pelosi set it off as we speak right now china is surrounding taiwan they're surrounding taiwan they've encroached on their airspace. Isn't it indicative that Nancy Pelosi is the new Helena Troy? She lands somewhere and it could set off something? You know? I guess modern times

is into mature women. What do you call that? A milf? She's a milf. She's a gilf. Gilf, yeah. Yeah.

Back in the day in history, they were all about that teen porn. Helena Troy, she was probably 18 when she caused wars. Now Nancy Pelosi, she's a gilf. Soul Joel's ready to go to war. So China's running drills. They're not happy. They want Taiwan.

As we know, we've spoke about many times. I mean, long days, this is the only podcast we've been speaking about this for the longest period of time. We were the first here. Just like with the cold open and just also talking about Nancy Pelosi's titties. It was us first. Just so you know. Because I've heard they've been making the rounds in other podcasts.

Just so you know where it all starts. I was the first one talking about those fucking big ass titties. And also Taiwan. So she went there. She with uh another lady president um and uh of taiwan and to show to show solitude to show um to show loyalty to taiwan we're here for you dog we got your back we got back. We know China's right here. Now, King Xi, President Xi, he hates Taiwan, dog. He wants it. He can't have this example of successful democracy and freedom right there on his doorstep. He's trying to prove

that the China model is superior and he can't have Taiwan people skipping around, skipping around free with their camera phones right across the water. Yeah. Can't have that. Cannot have that. So he's got to get rid of it. Got to get rid of it.

Just like if your wife or your girlfriend comes to your job and sees there's a hot lady and you guys are smiling at each other, she's got to get rid of that girl. She can't have that chick around. Taiwan is that chick, and that chick's got to go, which means your wife's going to tell you it's time for a change of career. She's getting you out of that office one way or the other. It's time to go.

Yeah. China is Doughboy, and Taiwan is Ricky. Exactly. Exactly. Boys in the Hood reference. There you go. other yeah it's time to go yeah china is dough boy and taiwan is ricky exactly exactly boys boys in the hood reference there you go that's what it is classic classic right there so who is presidency who is presidency by the way first of all nancy pelosi is funny she's over there like doing the opening ceremonies for the cold war. Meanwhile, her husband, Paul Pelosi, is in traffic court. Paul Pelosi, while she was over there, like the biggest news maybe of this century. This could go down as some of the biggest news of this century. In history,

the moment Nancy Pelosi went and taiwan after the pandemic in this climate with the rise of china and all its implications this is one of the biggest moments in the history of man kind okay person kind and can you imagine just her husband texting her from traffic court where he's getting he's getting drilled for a dwi i would like to hear that phone yeah he's just texting her going like hey how's it going she's going like i'm a little busy right now you fucking loser what did you have three heinekens to get behind the wheel guess what i'm going to represent the west i'm going to represent freedom and democracy over in the most important and precarious outpost in the Eastern Hemisphere.

What are you doing today? Well, I'm going to traffic court to deal with this DWI with my fucking lawyer who's court appointed, who hangs out on a wood bench outside and represents people who had a couple too many heinekens when they were coming home from the poker party i mean talk about we know who wears the pantsuits in that relationship she's also the one that tips him off about what's gonna go on with companies i mean she is the breadwinner before before they before she hung up she probably gave him a stock tip yeah before she hung up she was like oh and by the way here let me help you again let me help you again also you know um i took a lot of heat off of this news story because i'm going doing the biggest thing

in this century that's smart for the west yeah so nobody's paying attention to the fact that paul look at him too it is mug mugshot. Can you imagine? That is like the height and the low of a marriage all in the same week. Like, you know, it would just been better. It would have been more masculine if he was at home drinking hot cocoa, waiting for a call, watching Real Housewives. That would have been more masculine than going to traffic court to deal with a felony moving violation or whatever it's called.

He is her Ayesha Curry. Yeah. She was out there winning points for the Western world. He was getting points deducted from his license. It's a big, big gap between what the two of them are doing right now. She's out there litigating

for the USA. He over here making tummy tea. Yeah. That's a funny moment for the Pelosi household. Their kids are going like, yeah, both my parents are busy right now.

Neither one of them are home. They're doing different things. They're doing different things. They're doing different levels of different things. The kids call and get picked up from school. Hey, mom, can you pick me up? Oh, no, you're in China? Okay. Hey, dad, can you pick me up? Oh, you legally can't drive anymore? Never mind. I'll just call Uber.

Yeah, kids had to take an Uber on that day day mommy was away and daddy can't what's up guys we are brought to you by shady rays i'm wearing them right now with the wood frame they fit nice and snug and they look cool as i say my daughter, when she puts on sunglasses, I go cool. And she goes cool. So get yourself a pair of shady rays. They're an independent sunglasses company that offers a world crack class product. That's just as good as any expensive pair you've worn. And that is true. Me and Jesse got our pairs. They're absolutely, they feel very quality. Durable frames and extremely clear polarized lenses for outdoor activities. Check these joints out.

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It's crazy what is going on right now. This is a shift. This marks a shift. Like I'm saying, there's no more of that nonsense. If America doesn't unify right now for this cause, if the West doesn't unify, if NATO, the West, I mean, this is a big proxy war happening right now in Africa, in South America, in the Eastern Hemisphere, India, Pakistan. Everyone's choosing sides.

India, Pakistan, everyone's choosing sides. This is like the NBA All-Star Game, and Team LeBron and Team KD are picking their squad. Okay, you got Team Red Kami. Who do you got on that squad? You got Turkey, you got Iran, you got Pakistan, you got North Korea, you got Russia. That's your options. That's your options that's your options

and then on the west then in the west coast you got Steph on Steph's team you got all the NATO all the European countries right you got England of course

France, Germany the US, Canada. You pick which one sounds good to you. Which one do you want to go on holiday to? You know, where do you want to go? You want to go to Iran? You want to go check out? Be like, ooh, nice sand.

Nice sand. Or do you want to go to Paris? That's what it is. There's no in between right now. When war starts happening, it becomes a comic book world and it has to be that way. It has to be that way.

Okay? Enough of this America bashing right now. This is not the time for it. It's not the time for it. This is when, this Cold War is not about the sins of these different countries. Just like the Civil Rights Movement wasn't about Martin Luther King's extramarital affairs. This is about ideals.

This is about ideas. It's about systems of government. It's about your view of how man should be governed and how he should live. Should he live free or should he not? And I don't want to hear that bullshit because in China, they don't live free. And they even admit it. It's not even something that's in the dark, in the shadows. King Z will admit it.

Human rights is low on the agenda for his regime. The number one thing they want is economic independence is what they're pitching. That's what they're pitching. That's what they're pitching people. It's like Bitcoin. You want to be rich? I got a way to make you rich.

How are they doing it? Going, hey, man, you rich? I got a way to make you rich. How are they doing it? Going, hey man, you're a poor country. Let me help you out. Z comes along. He goes, hey man, look at your port. It's shit, you know, but you got all these natural resources here and you got a shitty port. How about this? China will build your port and we'll give you a loan to pay for it. It'll boost your economy here, create a lot of jobs, get you cooking. And they go, okay, but we don't have any money. And King Z goes, dog, here's a million Bitcoin. Now you got money. Just pay me in Bitcoin. He goes, oh man, King Z just made me a Bitcoin millionaire. Sure, build the port, dog. Bitcoin will just keep increasing in value. I'll be able to pay you back after I

ball out in my dictator's palace with all these hoes. I'll still have money left over. Port's built. Then President Z, like Paulie and good fellas, goes, fuck you, pay me. Now it's time to pay me. Problem with the bill, he can go to Paulie. Problem with the US, you can go to King Z. Problem with needing a little bit of money, here's another loan. You can go to King Z. But now, let's just pick one. Cameroon or whatever has to come up with King Z's money every month Problem with the West? Fuck you pay me Problem with food? Fuck you pay me Problem with a revolution of the people who kind of

are starving while you're partying in your mansion? Fuck you pay me Or how do you say that in Chinese? Take that talk And if you can't, guess what? You light a match, and you burn your ownership over the joint, and China says, fine, you can't pass.

Here's how we'll handle it. We'll take it over. It's ours now. We're in your country. Also, do you mind if we put a little military bash? Bash. We're in your country. Also, do you mind if we put a little military bash?

A little sub-bash, a little skunk. We put a little military bash. I think they've put one after they said they never would. That's the thing. When it comes to finding out who's good and who's bad, you got to really not listen to the rhetoric because the rhetoric is just to get you in the van. Right? Once you're in the van, that's when you get your titty bit off.

It's called the Ted Bundy School of Action. Right? So now they have a base in one country. They started putting bases in places because. They have, they put, they started putting bases in places because their real objective is to take over the world. Their real objective

is to spread communism around the world and for the whole world to live under communism with the center of this new world being in China, Beijing.

That's what they want. They want the shift of power to go from America to China, from the West to the East. They want the system to go from freedom, democracy, and capitalism to communism, full-blown communism. How did they get to this point? Well, it was a by all means necessary type of economy where they had some markets, they did whatever they needed to do to

build up, and they did. And now they're being a little bit more open and brash about what they want to do, right? And that's thanks to President Xi, who, by the way, was raised by the CCP after his father was seen as a dissident against the communists and was put in prison, probably tortured, of course tortured. And Xi was put in a re-education camp, a communist re-education camp, where he had to swear his allegiance to the Communist communist party to Mao. And he was really good. And he refers to himself in some writings or whatever as a survivor. Boy, did he survive and thrive. And then he was picked to lead China because he married, um, like the most famous opera singer who sang nationalist communist songs, who was like famous. He married her and that really upped his stature, you know, kind of like who would be a famous woman who was married,

kind of like, you know, Tom Arnold to Roseanne. Or I'm sure there's some other examples, right? And that really upped his stature and kind of made him in the people's eyes. And he is he is dedicated to Mao's vision. And he is dedicated to the reunification of Taiwan. He was dedicated to the reunification of Hong Kong. That's pretty much been done. We've covered it. Hong Kong is toast. So Taiwan, this island, brother, he wants it. Can't have that successful Western model right on his doorstep for his people to see. He can't have that.

on his doorstep for his people to see. He can't have that. He can't have that. But he wants Japan. He wants Korea. He wants the whole hemisphere to be controlled by China the way the United States has been controlling the West

and the world in a lot of ways. So here they come. Here they come. And the Cold War has started. So pick a side, baby. We got no time to hear the critiques. I don't care. I don't care. Because like I said, this war is about ideals. It's not about specifically America has some bad things. America does this. America, guess what? It's all you got. It's all we got is America.

Fuck yeah. So it's going to be, I'm telling you, this is going to be a binary result. We're either going to live under communism or we're going to live under freedom and democracy and capitalism. That's really what's going to happen. There's no choice because that's the hand that's being forced by China. That's what they want. That's what they're going to move forward doing. And so, you know, the domino effect is back, baby. Don't call me about the Gulf of Tonkin. I could give a shit less about it.

We probably did the right thing. We probably stopped those commies fucking dead in their tracks. Holy shit. Is this podcast brought to you by the 1950s? Give me a cigarette and a cup of coffee. I got a cup of Joe and a smoke. Let's take an ad break from our sponsors,

the McCarthyisms. Yeah. Look, we're not without sin. I get it. I get it. It's going to be fun. But, you know, this is going to start really, this and climate change are huge threats to the future.

Huge, huge challenges for the generations coming. And China does not play above board, man. They've gotten into every country. They've been buying properties. They've been lending out loans. They've been on the internet.

Cyber espionage. Spying. They've been pumping fake news everywhere. Trying to sow discord, trying to win the hearts and minds of politicians. They have allies in certain countries, in France and other places, in the parliaments who side with China,

which basically means China's probably paying them somehow under the table. If we don't enter in an era where we start to value integrity, because that's what China uses against us. They use our own greed against us. They got a lot of money because we paid them a lot of money to make our shit. So they got a lot of money and they like to pay people off. That's why the NBA is quiet, right? They also got a lot of military might and they're also,

they play dirty. They'll make you disappear. So they got people scared. They're buying people off. They're everywhere. This podcast is probably going to reach nobody. It's probably down by now. going to reach nobody. It's probably down by now. So, if you don't start seeing integrity make a comeback, we're in trouble because they prey on that.

They prey on our, you know, TikTok. That's a Chinese invention to get all our information and to make us stupider and to get us down to an attention span

of 45 seconds to a minute and we're dancing and we're showing our tits, we're showing our ass and. We're showing our ass. And they're loving it. Like it's a goddamn fucking Happy Meal. They're loving it. So integrity's got to make a comeback.

People have to start doing things on the principle of like, hey man, who's paying me? Tiger Woods. Surprise move, if you ask me. Was offered, here's where it gets messy because Saudi Arabia is kind of on our side. So this is where it gets messy. Because we get our oil from them, right?

And that fucking regime where they just have public executions in the street. Ah, this is where China gets us. Because they point to us and they go, look at what they're doing and they're not wrong, right? So we look the other way. We look the other way at the public executions and the human right violations and women can't drive and all that. If you got a little bit of oil, if you got that dinosaur juice, we'll look the other way, especially if you're

an ally against our worst enemy, which is Iran. We'll look the other way and we will give you a, what, $4 or $5 billion military aid for your defense systems, if you're Saudi Arabia, which just what America just did. They gave Saudi Arabia another $4 or $5 billion for their defense. Now, how much do you think actually goes into their defense? And how much do you think actually goes into the Prince of Saudi Arabia's pocket? Oh, all of it. They treat that money like Salvation Army treats donations.

Biden administration approves multi-billion dollar arms sale to Saudi Arabia. Oh, and I forgot the United Arab immigrants, whatever country that was that the West carved out as a place where we could safely buy their oil cheap from them. And they can, uh, they could get rich while their people have their land raped to their natural resource and work for nothing or whatever it is. I don't know what the arrangement is, but I'm sure it's not all pretty. I'm sure it's not just a Barbie doll of a situation. The U.S. State Department, they're giving equipment estimated 3.5 billion, estimated to be 3.5 billion of Patriot M104E guidance-enhanced missile, tactical ballistic missiles. The proposed sale will support,

here's the official statement from the State Department. The proposed sale will support the foreign policy goals and national security objectives of the United States by improving the security of a partner country that is a force for political stability. Can you say that with a fucking straight face? And economic progress. Can you say that with a straight face?

In the Gulf region. Hey, war makes for strange bedfellows. You ain't Iran, so you'll do. We got to worry about Iran. It's a messy world out there, my friends. It feels like the 50s are coming back. Doesn't it feel like 50s and the 80s where it's like the news is going to be

very foreign policy heavy right now, you know? I think you're not going to hear much about Sean King's dog coming up soon, okay? This might have been his last hurrah in the news. This is a fun story. All right, we've been dealing with a threaded nuclear holocaust, the Red Scare, Cold War,

a lot of scary stuff with horrible implications. Inflications. Inflications. That's a combination of implications and inflammation. I like it. Inflications. Inflications. Inflications. It's a combination of implications and inflammation i like it inflammation implications implications it's a new word i could be a new word because it's like implications but they're negative because they cause inflammation they're implications it's a combo package bravo bravo you dug yourself out that hole real quick brother adding to the lexicon bravo you i mean you look like you would create words with those glasses.

So, bravo, dog. These look like ladies' glasses. Yeah. Jared saw those on the table, and he was like, whose glasses are these? And I was like, they're mine. And he was like, did you have a lady over here? Yeah, I thought Roseanne Barr was going to be the guest

on the podcast today. So, this is a fun story, man man this is just a fun one so what happened was um uh sean king has a pack public action committee all right uh political action committee right a pack he has a pack right they receive donations that's that's what the PAC does. It's called Sean King's Social Justice PAC. It's the grassroots law PAC. I love how you pulled up the Washington Free Beacon for this. Because the first sentence is with the progressive grifter. I mean, we know.

I just don't like my media to say it. I just want the facts. They call it like they see it. They call it like they see it. They call it like they see it. Well, this one's impossible to see any other way because this was actually traced. So they found he... It's in all the outlets too.

It's not just in the free beacon. I saw it everywhere. So he paid roughly $40,000 to the California-based Potrero Performance Dog, Performance Dogs. That's what they're called, Potrero Performance Dogs. So according to campaign finance disclosures, the payments are labeled for contractor services, making their purpose difficult to discern.

But days after a $30,000, $650 payment in February, King coincidentally welcomed a new member of the King family, an award-winning Mastiff bred by Potrero named Mars. So, and King, what happens is, dog, you get every grifter or criminal-minded person just oh greed always gets them it's always a little too much when do you think he should have walked away okay if he would have walked away after i think if he would have walked away, I think if he would have walked away, right? And did something else after maybe,

when Kadeev got out? What was like a big, Tamir Rice, that was, he was a little too long because Tamir Rice's mom dragged him. You remember that whole thing? Yeah. Where she's like, listen, white man, stop capitalizing off my son.

She's like, we didn't have that fucking conversation. You lying white man stop capitalizing off my son she's like we didn't have that fucking conversation you lying white man that's when he went a little too far but if he got out early if he got out at like one of the first big uh problems right like one of the big like police shootings if he had got out early. Michael Ferguson. Maybe Ferguson. Michael Brown, maybe. Michael Brown and Ferguson. Somewhere back then, he just walked away and receded, right?

And he said like this, look, look, I'm gonna let you run it, but I'm in the back. Throw me my donation kickback. We'll keep it going, right? He would have been fine, right? But this is the reality of this world.

It can get dirty. You got a good cause you're hiding behind, and who do you have behind the good cause? You got a white man pretending to be black who's stealing money. You either die a hero or live long enough to see yourself become the villain. You either die a hero

or you live long enough to see yourself become a villain. And with that evil ass dog, that's the dog that a villain would have. That's the problem, Sean. You lived too long, dog. You lived too long to see yourself. I mean, dude, talk about someone who went from absolute

hero to villain. It's Sean King. I mean, the black community has turned their back on Sean King. Yeah. They have treated him the way the NYPD used to treat de Blasio. Just turned back at funerals.

So he gets this dog. Scroll down. So he gets the dog. And the thing about him, this is where he made his mistake. He makes a Facebook post with the dog, saying he got the dog. Not thinking in the future they're going to look into how the dog was paid for at some point and make the connection that that donation of $39,650 matched up to his Facebook post of welcoming a new family member that was gotten from that specific place that bred these show dogs.

Right? So he makes a Facebook post. He since del deletes it he deletes the post of course after sean king loves to delete shit i mean he's the king of fuck he'll put something up and he fucking deletes it so um king said mars would provide alertness and protection alongside duties as a family pet yeah that's what you want as a family pet. A show dog mastiff. A $40,000 pet. I mean, who are you, dog? Mike Tyson? I mean, did you get a tiger too?

And some other exotic animal? I mean, who gets a $40,000 show dog for a fucking family pet? And it appears that Thurbert is no longer in his care. Yeah, because he did post also. We had to give him back because he couldn't control him or whatever. But Mars was at the American Kennel Club competition earlier this month where he won best in show, which you make a little money from.

So it was a nice little investment that Sean King was trying to make. I just don't think he really thought out what it would be like to have a show dog Mastiff in the crib with his family when he's trying to write his articles and the Mastiff's trying to eat his babies. And he's like, you know what? Maybe this dog wasn't the best thing.

And he gave it back. So what ended up happening? So the dog actually won best in show under i guess their care right potrero because he was returned to potrero king has denied the allegations let's see let's see grub he's denied the allegations of fraud chalking his failed projects up to poor man oh that's other stuff because he's had other issues in 2019 he said he received 4166 for a monthly salary from Real Justice PAC and no compensation at all from Action PAC, the predecessor to grassroots law.

Kid's savvy, dog. Scroll down because I want to have what happened to Mars. Oh, that's the end of that article because the free beacon is only interested. They're not interested in the details. But, I mean, poor Sean King. He can't catch a break. Can't he just get a dog? Can't he just get a dog with donations from black?

Can't he just get a fucking dog with people's donations? No, because he can't. He's white. Sean King is white. Sean King's a white man. This proved to me that he's white. He's white. You want to get a dog from a best in the show,

that's basically like dog slavery. And as a black man, you can't be with that. You know what proved to me that he's white. He's white. You want to get a dog from a best in the show, that's basically like dog slavery. And as a black man, you can't be with that. You know what proved to me that he was white? His white mom, his white dad, and his white brothers. And his white birth certificate that said he was white. I mean, he wears transition lenses, not even his glasses know if he's black or white. In a rambling Instagram post,

I love his post when he defends himself. I like much of y'all. Remember that one? I like much of y'all. Have a messy family. You know, I have siblings I don't know about. You know, my mom told me something back in the day that she had an affair.

So he had another rambling Instagram post where he rallied against strict gun control laws. That's the perfect cover right now. You know, just talk about a cause people can get on board with. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Just boom. In New York and New Jersey.

He rallied against it. Yes. So he supported it and he insisted they kept him from arming himself to protect his wife. So wait, he rallied against strict gun control. Wow. He wants a gat. Wow, kid wants a gat. Kid's getting a little Republican.

Big-ass dog. You can't control him. Now, this is what you do, dog. You want to know Grifter fucking Hall of Fame moves right now? You want to know there's the Kareem Skyhook and then there's the Grifter switch from left to right. Political Eurostep. It's called the old fucking Ariana Hhook, and then there's the Grifter switch from left to right. Political Eurostep. It's called the old fucking Ariana Huffington, baby.

She went from right to left. That's what you do. Candace Owens, liberal, was not getting much traction. You switch to right. Sean King, baby, I respect it. Now, if he goes hard right, smooth move. Because those people will support you. If you come out and you go, yeah.

Now you make up a thing going, yeah. I was trying to infiltrate Black Lives Matter to get into it. It's a corrupt organization. You know what? I need my guns. If we see Sean King's website the next year and he's holding two AR-15s with a picture next to Kyle Rittenhouse. Deal is done.

We may see that. Just him and Kyle Rittenhouse like this. Just like that, him and Kyle Rittenhouse. He's going to have a let's go Brandon flag. But because he's trying to prove that he's black, the O is going to be a U. Yeah. It's right.

So he claimed he had to spend that money. So he's he claimed he had to spend that. So he's basically saying I had to spend that money because of the strict gun law. I mean, the kid is really shameless. The kid is yet you really, you had to get a, you had to get a $40,000 purebred show dog from a company that breeds show dogs. You wanted protection.

You couldn't go, you couldn't go meet a kid named Pookie on the street and get three pit bull babies like everybody else does. You couldn't go get yourself a German Shepherd for $1,200 by some unscrupulous Amish breeder in Pennsylvania. You couldn't do that.

You had to go get a fucking $40,000 dog. And the people who gave you the donations are just supposed to understand that that's what it costs to defend your family because you can't get a gun because of strict gun laws. Which if you were who you said you were, you should support.

Because I'd like to remind you, Sean King, you are entrenched on the left, my friend. And he's like, up until now. That'd be funny if Sean King releases a podcast. He's like, I'm sick of these fucking lips. And then next thing you know, it's Sean King. Fucking Sean King on Compound Media. He's just sitting there with Anthony Camilla.

Calling like, I'm sick of this fucking woke shit. Freedom of speech, baby. I should be able to yell the N-word if I want. Because it's my freedom of speech it really might be his only move dude i think it's his only move it's a smart move if you're a great that's a smart so many people have done it so many people have done that switch we're like they're not getting traction on one side of the political aisle and so they just switch to the other side and they're and they side. And those people welcome them because they love the fact that they switched.

Because it's like proof that the other side is bad. We got them. Yeah. So Joe Rogan, I think you're going to have a new neighbor in Texas. Looks like Sean King is headed to Austin, baby. To Republican Hollywood. That would be fucking hilarious, man. In the statement,

King insisted he spends more time each new day thinking about how to keep my family safe than I do the actual work I'm called to do. So know this. When you see reports about the money it costs to keep my family safe,

it's nowhere near enough not at all he's not even addressing the fact that the money was donations he's not even addressing that because he can't so he's doing what you call a little what they call a hoopty do where he's focusing on the other stuff his safety is there's probably some legitimacy to that right people hate him he's probably getting a few death threats or whatever. It's probably true. I know they published his house. The Post published his house. That wasn't cool. That wasn't cool at all when he bought that, what was it?

Close to a million dollar house in New Jersey. Man of the people type shit. It was only 700 grand. That wasn't that bad either. That wasn't that bad. And it's not right that they're posting his fucking house, right? So that's that bad. And it's not right that they're posting his fucking house, right? So that's not bad. But,

hey, Sean, listen, dude, if you want a gun and you want to protect your family, Texas is the place for you. You can go elk hunting with Tim Kennedy and you can hear some different perspectives about how if DeSantis doesn't win, we're going to

try to secede the state. You can hear some stuff like that. His critics include the mother of 12-year-old police shooting victim Tamar Rice, who accused him of soliciting donations by using his son's name. Yeah, that happened. She dragged him. That's when she called him white man.

It was very funny. She was like, white man. Yeah, I mean, that's how he gets his money, right? Donations. So they trace the money for this dog to the donations to his pack. And that's what they saw that the quote unquote, I guess, donation from the pack went to get this dog. So people are a little, people are critical of that because those are people's money that are going for him because he's saying this is for these causes

and I'm going to do things for these causes. But if I'm him, hey, I go, hey, man, if I need, I need to be safe to be able to do these causes. So I got the best show dog money could buy he's a good looking forty thousand dollar dog right there mars is nice looking it's a beautiful dog nice dog but he won't bite huh you won't bite though yeah i don't know if do they do do do dogs who win dog shows are they like tough no I don't think he's a tough Mastiff, right?

If you wanted protection, he got the Carlton Banks of dogs. Yeah. This dog just looks tough. He is. I mean, he's a Mastiff, so it's a purebred tough dog for sure. But I love the fact that he got rid of the dog too. Yeah. The funny thing is, do you get your money back or how does that work?

Do you return a dog? I have no idea, but you should. Yeah. I'm sure if he got his money back, I'm sure he put that money right back into the pack he put that right back into the pack i'm sure that didn't go for takeout that night just a little bit just give a little bit off for takeout for the family i'm sure i'm sure if we went to a seamless account much like they saw the dog pop up on his facebook feed uh right after the 39 000 i'm sure right when the dog went back we'd see a 200 bill to uh to szechuan delight

asian fusion in red bank new, to his Apple card, because he gets cash points back. Oh, man. Now, I can speak about Sean King, right? Because he's a white guy. A couple years ago, I'd be on thin ice. But he's a white guy. Sean King is 100% white.

He's a white man. He's a white guy. Sean King is 100% white. He's a white man. He's a white guy. You are white. He looks a little light-skinned in that photo, though. Dude, he, I mean... It's not just because of the boys in the hood t-shirt. Yeah, that helps, though. That doesn't hurt.

It hurts somebody. By the way, I saw Joe DeRosa wear a Boys in the Hood t-shirt, and he looked even more whiter. Joe DeRosa is actually Arab. You know that? And that's weird. That's why. That's exactly why it's weird.

He was adopted, but he's an A-Rap. Isn't it weird that Boys in the Hood has come up three times today? Yeah. It's come up three times. You made a Boys in the Hood reference. I was telling a story before about Boys in the Hood. And now Boys in the Hood is on the t-shirt. Three times, that's got to mean something, dog.

Is that going to bring back Cuba Gooding Jr.'s character to life? If it's three times comes up in a day, maybe that character comes back to life. I thought you were going to say his career. That too, but he got the Me Too. Oh, he got Me Too. He got Me Too, remember? Cuba Gooding Jr. got Me Too. He's doing jail time? No, I don't That too, but he got the Me Too. Oh, he got Me Too, right. He got Me Too'd, remember? Mm-hmm. Cuba Jr. got Me Too'd.

He's doing jail time? No, I don't think so. Is he? No, he just got a Me Too allegation that kind of killed his career. Mm-hmm. Yeah. That's all. I don't know what it was.

Yeah, he was inappropriately touching a woman somewhere in New York. Yeah, I mean, I don't know. What was the evidence of it? Just his face. Yeah.

So I don't know if I mentioned before, Tiger Woods turned down 700, did I mention that? $700,000 from Saudi Arabia to play in that golf tournament. We got sidetracked like we always do, but. What'd you say say 700 million oh what did i say 700 000 yeah yeah because yeah it was 700 700 to 800 million dude dude let's talk about

this for a second that's close to a billion dollars that's close to a billion dollars to what play in a tournament or what? Play in a tournament? Or what was it? Just a tournament? Yeah, they have like I don't know Five or six tournaments Throughout the year Dog

They're more like exhibitions They're not even real golf tournaments I got two questions here If I'm a Saudi citizen First, I'm going Why does my government Have 700 to 800 million dollars To give to a foreign golfer to compete in some

uh exhibitions while we're out here washing our feet in the street why that would be my first question my second question would be my first question why does my government have 700 million dollars do you understand the amount of money that is? That's insane. Oh, they're throwing money around like crazy. I mean, he's got the highest, but they've been throwing money at all the Masters winners and US Open winners.

Liz, Saudi Arabia, you're barking up the wrong tree. If you want to give blood money to certain people, start putting on comedy shows. Russell Peters will go there four times a year. You know? Just for laughs. Dude, you'll have some of those,

Trevor Noah will be there in a jiffy for that money. You kidding me? Oh man, that would be bad if somebody looked into where he's been touring.

I'm just saying because those guys do the world. Yeah, I know. And if we looked, if somebody looked into where he's been touring, cause he, cause I'm just saying, cause those guys do the world. Yeah, no. And I know for a fact, if you have done some princess private shows, that's a fact.

And look, I'm not knocking it because like I said, in our opening, they offered me 700,000 and they said, the only condition we have for you performing this show is you have to kill Jared and Jesse and bring back history hyenas. I'll do it. I'll do it. They tell me I got to divorce my wife.

I'll do it. They tell me I got to divorce my wife. I'll do it. 700,000? Million. I know, but I'm saying 700,000. I'll take 700,000. Someone offered me to do one fucking show? Are you kidding me? They offered him 700 to 800 million dollars.

Now, here's the thing. He turned it fucking down. Ladies. Ladies, ladies, is he bad? Did we do the whole Elon Musk thing or was that before the show where we talked about

what he's done for giving the internet to the Ukraine? No, you did it in the beginning. I did it in the beginning, right? Giving the internet to the Ukraine, single-handedly pushing the auto industry past fossil fuels and making other companies to compete with him also go green, essentially. Right?

Mm-hmm. Okay. Public enemy number one, Tiger Woods. He fucked a couple of flight attendants and Scandinavians or whatever the fuck. I don't even remember what he did because it shouldn't even be in the fucking news.

It's not relevant to his golf career or to him as a person. It means he's got a dick and it means he likes to use it and it means there's women who want him to use it on them. Whether he's faithful

to his wife or not, I don't give a fuck what he does. The guy's whole job is to find the hole. He does that. That's a goodie. That was a goodie. Yeah. It was a goodie.

His caddy's going, what are we playing, nine holes today? He's going, nine plus four. He's going, what, you got four women? No, two. I'm just going in both the holes. That was a goodie, Jared. I mean, Jared comes with some goodies. His job is to find

the hole, and the kid is good at finding holes. So you're going to blame him for it? So I'm now supposed to read this story and go, oh, it doesn't matter. You know, Tiger Woods did something out of principle this huge. He turned down $800 million. But you remember he cheated on his wife.

You know, he cheated on his wife, and he's got some sky miles with some fucking, with some stewardess. Why couldn't I find the word stewardess? Flight attendant. There you go. So he turned down the money because of Saudi Arabia's record. Why did he turn down the money? How funny would it be if I just did that whole rant

and he turned down the money because Iran offered him $3 billion? That's what happens when you have an opinion before you read the article, all right? Which happens a lot on this podcast. So what was the payment? The players who have chosen to go live and to play there, I disagree with it. I think that what they've done,

they've turned their back on what has allowed them to get to this position. Okay, what does he mean by that? He's talking about the PGA Tour. Okay. Because the tour, you know, he's pro, so there's been set up this competition. Okay, so it's not really about the human rights abuses

in Saudi Arabia. No. But it sounded good. Well, they're using that too. They're using it right there. Yeah, they're using that. That's good well the pga tour is if you decide to play in this live tournament the pga door is kicking you out

you can't be a part of the pga tour anymore so all these players that have made a choice to go play a lit and live are then now not eligible to play in the pga tour anymore so what tiger is saying is that tour has made us all right right? This is why we vote. And now you're turning your back on them. Exactly. Does he mention anything about the public executions? Well, yes.

The president of the PGA, he went hard. He started talking about 9-11. He started talking about... Saudi hijackers. Yeah, all that shit. Women can't drive. Yeah, he went hard.

Yeah. Yeah, public executions. Right. The, all that shit. Women can't drive. Yeah, he went hard. Yeah. Yeah, public executions. Right. The royal family. Right. How they mess their people up. They don't give the money to the people. You can say all that.

So we're still on track. We still got the right point. He did do it. This is a principle. He's doing this out of principle. Obviously, he's a little bit principle because he's at the end of his career. He's not going to make $700 million to $800 million in the PGA Tour.

He's already a billionaire. Yeah. Well, so is his Scandinavian fucking au pair wife who deserved every penny. That's right. She deserved every penny of his hard-earned golf training and tournament earnings. She deserved every penny of him making history. She deserved every penny of him making history. And then some, you couldn't get whiter than a Scandinavian babysitter who got 500 milli.

What'd she get, 250 milli? I'm sure a lot. She was a babysitter, dog. She was an au pair. His wife was an au pair. She's the rich, is she the richest au pair on the planet Earth? Y'all know, we come from Scandinavia. We come from Germany. We have no black guys.

I love black guys. I love some black guys. Tiger Woods. I've got a fairly lot of Tiger Woods. I didn't know he had millions. I just love black guys. I didn't know he was Tiger Woods. Rich's au pairs are her and Mary Poppins. See, what the shit here is that the PGA didn't have to kick them out.

They could have just let them play. So the PGA Tour is doing it on principle a little bit. Kind of. I think they, you know. See, it's wartime. Let's spin this the right way. That's the thing. See, look, right there, we can't do it.

You're too nuanced. Yeah, but they do see the PGA that holds. This is about communism and freedom. And Tiger Woods chose freedom over the tyranny of terrorism and communism. Roll Tide. That's it. Alabama football will be on ABC tomorrow where our players are now able to make money off their likeness

because it's America, baby. We do the right thing. Roll Tide. Okay, what were you saying? What's the details? So they kind of did, they kind of didn't. Well, they're using that, but they hold exhibitions in China. They have, yeah, I mean, like there's-

Few in North Korea. Right, I mean- Yeah, maybe a few in Pakistan. There's a- The Turkey Open. There's always the Turkey Open. Plus they got multinational corporations sponsoring every weekend of a golf tournament.

So, you know, there's no clean money. Yeah, there's no clean money. There's no clean money there's no clean money you know i think they see it as except bitcoin it's off to it's a bitcoin okay brought to you by the chairman of the fed logan paul all right so tiger woods did do something on principle yeah but everybody has selective principle huh everybody has selective principle. Huh? Everybody has selective principle. It just matters what they want.

Saudi Arabia gave him $700 million. He'll turn it down. If you offered him 72 versions, that's a different story. Tiger's taking that. Tiger's taking that deal. That's a different story. Yeah. Even if he's 72 wives, Tiger's going, wait a second.

That's kind of what I was going for. I'll take that. He's going to be putting in a permanent sand dune. Right. Because that's not what, money doesn't really motivate him. He likes puss, puss.

Exactly. The kid likes puss, puss. So Saudi Arabia, you just gave him a bad contract. It's really what it is. Anyway, hats off to Tiger,

right? For at least standing up for the PGA Tour, standing up. I'm sure the human rights violations have something to do with it. What are the players who took the money in Saudi? Oh, there's a bunch. But it's also complicated because they are our ally. So I'm breaking my own law. If you're against Iran, you're with us. I guess.

I don't know. Just send me a million dollars and I'll say whatever you want. So this is a fun story. Beyonce and Monica Lewinsky have gotten into it. Famous for different reasons. Famous for different reasons. Both talented for different reasons. But both at the center of cheating scandals. Both at the center of cheating scandals.

Both at the center of cheating scandals. Yes. Both at the center of cheating. Talented for different reasons. But talented nonetheless. Both famous for their mouths. Both famous for their mouths in one way or the other. Absolutely.

The fame comes from this area. Comes from that area. Comes from that area. So, Monica Lewinsky. I love how she's like, we're supposed to feel bad. You suck the president's, you know what I mean? What do you want me to do?

You suck the president's dick. That's how you, I mean, what do you want me to do? You want me to, you know? If you got found out, there's a chance you become famous for sucking the president's dick and having a trial happen and him being impeached because he said I did not have sexual relations. And he was not lying when he said he did not have sexual relations because sticking a cigar in a girl's pussy is not considered sexual relations.

That's called... Performance art. Yes. That's performance art. Why the hell were you not his lawyer? That's the best defense I heard right there for him not lying under oath. Was that not? They should have said, wait, you lied under oath. He would have been, did I lie under oath? You asked me if I had sexual relations with that woman, sexual relations. If this would have happened in this era,

he would have been able to redefine sexual relations the way Biden has redefined inflation. He would have been able to totally go, what happened was. Don't you love the way Biden and his press secretary are just not calling? What are they calling it again? Are they calling it just sort of a-

Slowing economical growth. A slowing. Anything can be anything now. Inflation isn't happening even though it's textbook. It's textbook. By the textbook definition of inflation, we have inflation. Biden and his administration are going what happened was we have a slowed economic school zone where we want the economy to go slow for the safety of

the children you are in a slow economic school zone slow it down we're just slowing it down for the safety of the kids if this would have happened to Clinton in this era he could have totally been like performance art he would have been like you asked if I had sexual relations I did not

if you look at the details I took a cigar may I add a Cuban and I put it in her pussy If you look at the details, I took a cigar. May I add a Cuban? And I put it in her pussy. Now, that is a performance art about how the Cuban Missile Crisis, that was an allegory, the Cuban Missile Crisis. Cuba is the cigar trying to go into America, which is the pussy. Okay?

And I pulled it out. And I pulled it out. And I pulled it out and I smoked it, meaning we beat those Cubans with sanctions and we also prevented a nuclear war with the Russians through our back-channel negotiations with Robert Kennedy and the Russian ambassador in hotel rooms rooms off the record on the QT. Okay. Now by back channel negotiations, I had anal sex with Monica Lewinsky.

That was an allegory for the back channel negotiations that saved this world from a nuclear holocaust. I rest my case, artistic freedom, artistic expression. For the same reason when Dave Chappelle goes into a venue and lights up a cigarette, that's exactly what I did. Because that's protected under performance law. Did you know that? Yeah. Yeah. As long as you smoke, it could be-

Yeah, it's part of his character piece. Yeah, you're allowed to smoke and that's why Dave Chappelle always just fucking lights up because I'm on stage. It's part of my piece. It's part of my character. It's part of my play.

It's part of my skit. That's what Bill Clinton could have done. So anyway, the controversy's fun, right? This is a fun controversy, right, Jared? Mm-hmm. So what do we have here?

What's going on? So Beyonce just dropped a new album called Renaissance. On that album, she uses the word spaz, which as we covered, Lizzo got in trouble for using that word on one of her songs. The ableist community said, hey, listen, that's offensive. That's a slur. You can't use that. What community? The ableist community.

Now the ableist community, who are the Ablest? Ablest community, are they the disabled community? I believe so. But they're called Ablest? Correct. You sure it's not the disabled community? The disabledest community? I mean, that sounds like a grunge band that came out of Seattle.

It does. Is it the disabled community that doesn't like the term disabled, so they've called themselves the opposite because it's wanted to be progressive? Well, you only shoot for what you want to be. Well, that's confusing because ableist, well, what does ableist mean? That means you're being insensitive to people who are disabled. People who are unable to do something. Okay.

So ableist, so the ableist community, the people who are advocating on behalf of the people who have some sort of disability. Correct. Which is now called ability. There you go. Okay.

So the people who have a disability, which is an ability, were upset because of the word spaz. Spaz. In Beyonce's song. Didn't this happen to Lizzo? Lizzo earlier. And it was the same word spaz? Yes.

Is spaz the word hot in the streets right now? Why did the word find its way into two songs? I don't know, but I mean spaz has been around. Spaz is around. Spaz, spasm. Yeah, spaz out. Don't spaz out. Muscle spasm is going crazy.

Muscle spasm is another one. Yes. Right. So if she put the word muscle in front of spaz, then it would be no controversy. That is scientific. My foot has a foot spasm can't cancel my foot muscle spasm is the n word with the a and spasm is the n word with the

er there you go right okay i'm trying to understand okay so she did the she did the spasm word with the er according to the ableist community which is the disabled community but they are ableist yes okay i'm following. There you go. Okay. So in all this controversy, Monica Lewinsky stepped in. She said, okay, if she's going to change the word spaz, Beyonce, you might want to change what you said in your song on the partition, which you released in 2016.

Whoa, they went back. She went back, way back. Wait, okay. So the word spaz, she changed it. Beyonce changed it? She's changing it now. She's going to change it. She's going to change it. She's going to change it now.

Yes. What do they do with the old version? They're probably just going to re-upload it, you know? Yeah, it's probably going to be on 4chan and become like a... Yeah, it's going to be on our clips page. Yeah. Or it'll find its way to the right. Well, they'll be like, hold it up as a song where the word spaz...

See, because they create the reaction too because of how stupid this is. So then the reaction goes in trolls with the word spaz. See, because they create the reaction too because of how stupid this is. So the reaction goes in trolls with the word spaz and they'll probably use that Beyonce song at their little fucking Nazi rallies. It's good for business. Yeah, it's just you know, these two fucking factions of crazy need each other. It's like peanut butter and jelly.

You know, it's like cops and robbers. They kind of need each other. Okay, so she says she's going to change the word, especially she capitulates. And then, of course, once you capitulate, they want more, right? Give them in. She'll take them out.

So now that she, Monica went back? Monica steps in. She goes, hey. And what the fuck does Monica have to do with anything? There's a part in partition where she's explaining that her and her man are having sex in the back of a seat. he goes oh he monica lewinsky'd on my blouse saying that you know he ejaculated on my blouse monica lewinsky goes hey you should change that it's not accurate it would be he bill clinton'd on my blouse since bill clinton is the one coming i have nothing to

do with that please change it no you monica Monica Lewinsky'd on the dress. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Because listen, there's a lot of girls that Bill Clinton did that to, and you're the famous one. You're the most famous one. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Let's be honest.

That's not the first time Bill Clinton has dripped a little semen on some fucking clothes. Okay, we know that. So then what does she say? Beyonce. Beyonce has not responded, but there's been an onslaught of people who told monica lewinsky shut up some people told her that she's racist because every artist has done that it backfired yeah and yet you do this to a black woman you're telling a black woman to change the lyrics right because everyone makes monica lewinsky jokes comedians artists whatever And she's coming after Queen Bee.

Now, who came after Queen Bee in the first place with the word spaz? Because usually you can't come after Queen Bee. Everyone's united about fucking with Queen Bee. That is our royal family, okay? That just shows you the difference, right? I mean, that's the Queen Bee dog. So the Queen Bee capitulated, and she's going to change her spaz

lyric because of the ableist community yes now monica winsky gains confidence and she goes let me jump in there and get a 2016 song lyric changed and that's when beyonce fans go, fuck you, bitch. Yeah, exactly. Fuck you, bitch. It is Monica Winsy that hoe. Meaning I stuck a cigar in your puss puss. And so that's where we are right now. That's where we are. Oh, this is sort of like a woke off. Yeah, it's a woke off.

It's a woke off. It's a snowball effect, but it's a woke off. This is a woke off, dog. This is the same as what used to be called the Mexican stand walk off this is a walk off dog this is the same as what used to be called the Mexican standoff this is a walk off it's like who's going to win this walk war is it

is Monica Lewinsky racist or is Beyonce not like not unified with other women right or sort of like

you know doing the wrong thing for women right so that's what that's what is it's either a feminist issue or a race issue

she is with you know the woman aspect she got cheated on she married a man that's not in her tax bracket that's very womanish that's very womanish

yeah yeah and I love that this is happening between two famous women. They're both famous. Yeah. I mean. For different reasons, but they both have talent. Yeah.

One's talent's a little different than the other one's. Remember, everyone's worth the same in this new world. Okay? Monica. They have different levels of importance. They got different levels of importance, but their names are both pretty famous. Monica's Brittany Griner, and Beyonce's the Russian arms dealer.

It's what it is. What? What? Oh, man. I thought that trade was going to go through if they offered two first-round draft picks. I feel like that trade could have gone through. They were just a little light on the prospect draft picks.

Otherwise, it's a good trade. It's a good trade for Russia. This is a very funny story. I don't know what... Right now, it's just a detente. We don't know what the solution is going to be. So when does Amanda Seals come in and give a verdict? She's the one

on the top of my head. I assume there's a council where her and Hari Kondabulu and a bunch of others sit on and they make a ruling on who wins this walk-off.

I mean, we can't just have a tie. This isn't going to end like a soccer game, right? Zero, zero, nil, nil. Somebody's got to win. Is Monica Lewinsky racist

or is Beyonce insensitive to the feminist cause? Which one is it? Or what if they're both? We need a ruling. Who's the top woke? Who's the top? Who's the top?

Who's the most famous one? AOC. AOC. I'm sorry. I apologize. Those are the first names that came toOC. AOC. I'm sorry. I apologize. Those are the first names that came to mind. I went low to the ground on authority, right? You went G League.

Amanda Seals, that would be like a neighborhood watch. AOC's more like a governor, right? Or like a president. Yeah. So I apologize. So AOC, please give your ruling. Somebody's got to step in and give a ruling here on who it should be.

If you want my opinion, I think Monica's racist. Because why not? Let's ruin that bitch's life a little more. It'd be great if she's known as the most famous whore and racist. I know, you're not a little more. It'd be great if she's known as the most famous whore and racist. I know, you're not a whore.

I get it, I get it, I get it. You were a young intern. You were manipulated. You had no idea what you were doing. No, it's not you. He was married. You didn't know.

You didn't know. I can't call her that. You can't. You have to have sympathy for Monica Lewinsky who was fucking another woman's husband because of feminism.

Aren't those rules funny? Aren't those rules funny, who was fucking another woman's husband because of feminism. Aren't those rules funny? Aren't those rules funny? She was fucking another man's husband. And I said man, and that's accurate. Did you catch that? I'm not even going to correct myself because the person I'm referring to, that works also. I'm not even going to correct myself because the person I'm referring to, that works also. She's fucking another woman's husband, but people would get mad at me for calling her a whore because of unity and feminism.

How funny is that? When did this era start where people don't want to deal with the consequences of their action did she not do something wrong by fucking a married man did she not do something wrong or is she just a fucking how old was she 24 give me the fuck out of here i was driving a car when i was 24 i was living in my mom's house on my own accord at 24 i I was a full-grown adult with a fucking degree. I had had jobs. I was a lifeguard every fucking year in college. I got paid. I paid taxes.

And you tell me you didn't know what you were doing? You were an adult. This infantilization, is that a word? It is now. Yeah, I mean, was she not an adult at 24? We're supposed to believe the power dynamic fucking made her think she didn't know what she was doing? That's what women want to do. They want to fuck power.

The thing is, women don't give a shit about other— She didn't give a shit about Hillary. She was sitting in the Oval Office fucking this guy who's married to the First Lady. And she's upset about her reputation. I mean, what the fuck are we doing? Ah, farted. And she's going to come at the queen bee about a lyric? The president's intern side piece.

Is there anything I'm saying that's not right or true? No. I'm supposed to think about her feelings? Why was she not thinking about Hillary's feelings? Why do we have to consider everyone's feelings at all? Why is everyone a child? You made your decision and I made mine. I got to make content.

You're the source of content. I don't know you. I don't hate you, but I would definitely probably also stick a cigar in your butt. I mean, are you kidding me? She's one of the chillest girls of all time. She allowed the dude to put a cigar in there. I love cigars.

I love puss puss. If I could combine those two things, I'll marry her. I would have married her.. If I could combine those two things, I'll marry her. I would have married her. That's the problem. The problem is I would have married her, but she didn't want to be someone who would marry her. She wanted to be fucking somebody else's husband, which is the

most unfeminist thing you can do, right? I'm sorry. It's called long days for a reason, right? Anyway. And try to care about this news. We killed some Al-Qaeda terrorists.

I mean, that's like if someone put on an alternative comedy show right now and said, come see this show. You'd be like, did this show happen in 2009? I mean, this news was really like, what? They're still out there? Al-Qaeda leader Ayman al-Zahari killed in drone strike. Who gives a fuck? That's like seeing somebody with a Zoom. Yeah.

You're going like, what? Yeah, it's like a Zoom comedy show right now. You're going like, that's over, dog. We're on to new things. It's called the Cold War. All right? What? Yeah, it's like a Zoom comedy show right now. You're going like, that's over, dog. We're on to new things. It's called the Cold War. All right? We're not worried about a ragtag bunch of Islamists in the deserts that you only made important to distract us from the fact that you were over there to bolster the military industrial complex, disaster capitalism, and cheap oil. We get it. Ooh, they're on monkey bars. I'm scared. No, we're not scared anymore because there's actual real threat with a real fucking army with real nukes, with real hate for us. And they're giving us fentanyl in order to pay us back

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