Yannis Pappas Hour - For Rome

Episode Date: October 9, 2021

The Church tsunami victim numbers are going up, Amanda Knox should have been rescued but she is for Rome so I get it, leaks at Facebook and the Pandora papers oh my, Sara Silverman is mad with “The Squad”, NASA is gonna attempt to knock an asteroid off its course while Captain Kirk boldly goes where a few billionaires have gone before. Yanni Greco-Roman wrestles with it all, captain. Wasdadealis Weekly bonus episode: https://www.patreon.com/yannilongdaysSponsors: Rayconhttps://rayconglobal.com/pages/longdays?utm_source=podcast&utm_medium=influencer&utm_campaign=/longdaysButcher Boxhttps://www.butcherbox.com/fumes/PDS Debt https://pdsdebt.com/?page_id=1485The show goes out every Saturday night at 9 to youtube and podcast audio platforms but while it's being recorded the show goes LIVE on Yannis' Instagram!Come join in on the LONG DAY & Follow Yannis PappasInstagram - https://www.instagram.com/yannispappas/Twitter - https://twitter.com/yannispappasWebsite - https://www.yannispappascomedy.com/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome to another episode of Long Days with your favorite Greco-Roman wrestler, Giannis Pappas. There's a lot going on in the world, there's a lot going on in my head. There was a lot going on in the toilet bowl just a couple minutes ago where I unleashed a fury of backwards burritos and salt and vinegar chips. I've been staying up real late till five in the morning, fighting falling asleep because I got 75 inches up in my man cave and there's just always another documentary about murder to watch. Speaking of murder, the Zodiac Killer has been caught,

but he's dead. He died in 2018. So again, not the best police work, fellas. Also, who cares? All right? What did he kill, five people? Fucking COVID is the new best serial killer. And that's the one that we are

concerned with i don't care about some fucking squeak from san francisco who decided to stop killing after a couple of years because he got his fill that's not the serial killers we're interested in i want my serial killers to haunt us till they get caught okay to keep going not stop like b2k fucking go like fucking ted kaczynski go like ted bundy go uh i would say the zodiac killer is sort of like an intramural serial killer who sent a couple of fucking letters and then disappeared fuck you jake gyllenhaal played you in a movie and it sucked. I want to take this time to promote yannispappascomedy.com I am going to be in Baltimore and Phoenix and other things so go get

your other thing. So go get your tickets on my website. Also look at these squeaky clean which is a short lived bonus episode on my podcast that may be turning into a history episode because the last one,

the mic was broken for half of it and it was one of the best episodes I've ever done. But somehow the water contaminated my microphone so you could only hear half of it. You're getting your money's worth with Yanni Long Days. But go buy these shirts at yannispappascomedy.com.

We've got tons of Long Days merch. Also go to patreon.com at yannispappascomedy.com we got tons of Long Days merch also go to patreon.com slash yannilongdays for all the bonus content up there that goes up weekly we'll talk about what's going on after this Wastadillas Yeah. Here we go. I just wanted to change it up. I've realized every episode I do no promo because I'm not a savvy marketer.

Okay? I'm just not a savvy marketer. It's what it is. I am someone who just says what I want sometimes and I shouldn't say it. You know, I should be thinking like Steve Jobs did about how it's going to be received first and then billed backwards. I watched a speech with Steve Jobs and he was criticized and he goes, you know, you make a good point. But at the end of the day, it's about will the consumer buy this? Okay. Whatever comes out of my mouth, I never first go, will the consumer like this?

first go will the consumer like this which is key to reconciling art with the marketplace if you want to turn art into some sort of viable marketed product you need to think you need to have a step between what's going on here and what comes out here what i go is i go ram i don't have a face rubber i need a mind condom is what i gotta do i gotta stop you people i gotta stop making love to your minds digitally raw daddy i gotta dome up and play it a little safer because at one point I'm making a joke and then the next point I'm yelling about the Catholic Church and the 340,000 children that they know of who have been raped by French clergy. Which is probably okay because at least when the kids received communion,

it was good French wine. That is what you call a consolation prize. And in France, I don't know, when you receive communion, they put a little piece of cheese on your cracker, which is nice. And then when you sip the communion, the blood of Christ,

which is wine, of course, and effigy, you drink his blood, which isn't weird at all. Now, the Catholic Church isn't a weird pedophile institution that looks like Gargamel lives there. Not at all. It's good, holy people dressed in black, like fucking Taliban women.

In the French church, they give you a cracker and wine, and then it's the only church where after you take a sip of wine, you go, the body of Christ is a good year always from a good vineyard in France every year so um this is the new report yesterday by the way um the report was 200,000 confirmed I love how they they soften it even in the press. They go, children victims of church abuse. That's how like the military PR, when we're in a war, reports maimings. You ever notice that? They go, 14 soldiers were injured today

in a firefight with guerrilla fighters in the middle of Kabul. And you go, were they injured? Oh, they were injured. Much like, I don't know, much like they were injured like Kyrie Irving. They maybe, you know, have what they, a little tendonitis in the knee. Maybe they have a little tendinitis in the knee? Maybe they have a hyperextended elbow? Or are they missing a few limbs and look like a starfish now? That's a little different of a report. But when you PR it, when it goes to the PR department, they go, whoa, whoa, whoa, let's change the word from maimed to injured. Let's say, you know, injured. Not maimed and altered forever and they wish they were dead.

Let's go with injured. Just like here. Why is my fucking phone turning off? Why are you turning off? Why is my live turning off right now? Facebook and Instagram has been acting weird since the CCP hacked it. Who did the hack?

CCP. Yeah, you know me. Who did the hack? CCP. Yeah, you know me. Who down with CCP? Yeah, you know me. Who down with the CCP? Yeah, you know me. What was that shit? That was a work it, girl. Turn to the left. Turn to the right. Do your thing on the runway. Cover girl. Work it, girl.

Turn to the left. Turn to the right. Yas, yas, yas. Yas, daddy, yas. Why is it fucking turning cover girl work it girl turn to the left turn to the right yes yes yes yes daddy yes why is it fucking turning off so I checked in yesterday Catholic Church the numbers were 200 but then they just kept climbing

like the deaths during the big tsunami in the east you remember it was like you checked in one day and it was like 100 confirmed dead then it was like

oh 100, 000 confirmed dead dude we are up to 300 000 and this is the pr victims no rape victims they were raped okay children don't get molested. They get raped. If there's some fucking old Irish guy who's got translucent skin and looks like he climbs Mount Everest for a living and you can see the veins underneath his skin because he's a North fucking European snow monkey and he's wearing a black cape with a little white Hitler mustache on his neck

and he's asking you to jerk his dick. You have been raped, Timmy. You've been raped. You have not been abused. You know what abuse is? Abuse is you're a bad father. When someone says you're a bad father, I go, that's abusive. That's abusive language. your father, I go, that's abusive. That's abusive language. If someone calls me a Greek child fucker and they say it, I say, that is abusive language. If someone says, you know what, Greece is the albundia countries. You guys were popular in high school because you were the high school quarterback, i.e. you had democracy 2,000 years ago and ever since then you've been selling shoes. I go, that is abusive. But if someone puts their fucking tongue

in my prepubescent asshole, that is what you call rape. Does anyone have a rape whistle? When is consequence culture gonna catch up to the Catholic church? J. Harvey 15, Catholic priests gave sex so much consequence culture, going to catch up to the Catholic Church. Jay Harvin, 15. Catholic priests gave sex so much, nobody might as well change their name

from father to daddy. Okay, that was one that had a couple typos in it. Jay Harvin, 15. I need you to proofread. Jay Harvin, 15, might just become our beanbag correspondent. We might just get his ass on the beanbag. We did an episode with JHarvin15.

He's very funny. Guys, JHarvin15 is what you follow him. What was his real name? We wanted him to change it. I don't even remember. Jared? Wasn't it Jared? Go with JHarvin15.

Go with JHarvin. Jared's fine too. But we did an episode with uh Jared I hope we're getting that right I I have a 23andme test that I did pay extra to find out what genes I have I do have the gene for late set Alzheimer's and also I'm prone to type 2 diabetes so um it's a stunning revelation but uh if you're a viewer of this podcast, you already knew that I had the gene for late-term Alzheimer's because I'm not a young kid anymore,

and it's kicking in already, baby. It's like an acid trip. It has started. It has started. The forgetfulness has started. The mispronunciation, the must pronunciation has started. Do you think we should have invaded Italy to save Amanda Knox? I mean, have you watched that fucking documentary on Amanda Knox?

She was just on Joe Rogan a week or two ago. This fucking Italian police chief had the most hellish sadomasochistic imagination. And he had to do so much mental gymnastics to put this, let's be honest, for Rome fucking American peace. Because she is para Roma. The problem is she might have, they might have wanted to keep her

because she was for Rome. So they just said, let's just throw her in prison. There's nothing we can do. I'm sorry to Mr. and Mrs. Knox. Your daughter is too much of a piece, and I have to take her for the Roman family that rules now. I don't even know a political system. I imagine they fucking vote by pizza slices or whatever they do.

You know, whoever gets the most ass grabs in public gets elected because they got a weird way of hitting on you over there and it's grabbing your arm and going, bella, bella, bella. So Amanda Knox was put in prison for eight fucking years with like zero evidence in the modern era where there's forensic and DNA.

They couldn't tie her to shit and she obviously didn't kill her and it was this other guy. And this bitch spent eight years in prison because this one fucking detective who had this imagination. I can tell you one person who's traumatized by Italian food the same way Steve Jobs' daughter is traumatized by an iPhone. There's one person who doesn't want to see a spaghetti bolognese again in her life. And that amanda knox if you're gonna go on a date with amanda knox do not take her out for calzones because she might start shaking it and need a clonopin to deal with it that's a bitch who's gonna be eating sushi for the rest of her

life can you imagine being in an italian prison for eight years and let's be honest she's a stone cold for rome peace and if you don't know what for rome means it means she's so hot that if i was an emperor during the roman era i would just have my minions pluck her off the street in front of her parents as they cried and say i'm sorry mr and mrs knox there's nothing i can do i have to take your daughter for the state there's nothing the rep the emperor yanni has called for her to be part of his harem, and there's nothing we can do. She is para Roma.

She's para Roma. Let's get back to the Catholic Church, which, great segue, was formed in Rome. The Roman Catholic Church. Because you're not astonished by the number of 330,000 children since 1950. They got 330 kids that they raped in France. That is unbelievable. When is, yeah, when is cancel culture going to catch up to the Catholic church? I understand their numbers are down, but it's like, if you say one inappropriate thing to a woman in the workplace now, you will be fired. You will be scarlet lettered and you'll never be able to work again if you

just say to your co-worker damn you got a fat ass your career is over now if you rape 330,000 children it's almost such a big number it's the it's the reason why Stalin gets a pass sometimes because you're going like Hitler Hitler Hitler and hitler was bad um but then you have stalin who did the same thing killed but for different reasons did all these purges and he's up in the millions too but you know people still want to be communist it's the same thing with catholics catholics going that that's not that's just a few bad apples where You're saying, if that's a few bad apples, that is a few talented bad apples who, much like, come on, man, Wilt Chamberlain,

were able to put up some Hall of Fame fucking numbers. There's only one group of people who could rival Wilt Chamber Hall of Fame fucking numbers. There's only one group of people who could rival Wilt Chamberlain's fucking numbers, and that's the Catholic Church collectively has put up Wilt Chamberlain type number. What was he fucking? I think they averaged out, he claimed to fuck like 5,000 women a week

or something like that. It was a lot. Wilt Chamberlain has claimed to fuck a lot of women. And the thing about that is it's hearsay. All we have is Will Chamberlain's word on it. Here we have evidence where people just go, yeah, you know what it is. When I was eight years old,

Father O'Hanlon used to come over and, you know, he would give me cookies and then he would blow me. So, and you go, no, that's confirmed. And he would give me cookies and then he would blow me. And you go, no, that's confirmed. I don't know what it's going to take. Yeah, so Will Chamberlain claims to have slept with 20,000 women. Remember we were astonished?

20,000, that's not possible. The Catholic Church has raped 330,000. The number's so big, it's like the universe. You can't grok it. Grok's a big, you can't, it's like the universe. You can't grok it. Grok's a good word. Can't comprehend it. You know? And the Catholic Church will be open on Sunday.

And they will, they're weighing in now. The Pope is weighing in. He just weighed in on global warming, right? He's going, yeah, we got to do something about this. It's like, Pope, before you jump to global warming, why don't you figure out how you can stop children from warming up your priest's bed?

How about that? How about we eliminate that warm spot in their bed that is facilitated by a young child's body? How about we keep that side of the mattress cold? Can you figure out how to keep that side of the mattress cold as the other side of the pillow, you fucking captain, fuhrer of Pedophilia. They know it. Oh, here's another thing I've forgotten that rant that I got demonetized on Instagram for, and we're going to get to you, Mr. Zuckerberg.

Here's another thing about the Catholic Church, you never wonder. They have, for some reason, their own fucking country with their own police and their own laws. I wonder why. When the fuck is there going to be a rock-led movie

where he, goddammit, leads a bunch of Ocean's Eleven-type assassins into Vatican City to uncover what the fuck is happening in the annals of the Vatican. Because I tell you what, there ain't no libraries in the basement. I just like to do that

in the Jack Nicholson voice from Departed. This ain't reality TV. There are horrific child prisons, without a doubt, in the Vatican, where there's kids just, I mean, the Vatican basement probably looks a lot like Ariel Castro's basement, just with a lot more kids. Do you remember Ariel Castro?

A kid from Cleveland who kidnapped like two girls for 12 years and had them locked in the basement. I wonder where you learned that. Castro, Hispanic, Catholic Church. They grew up Catholic. Now, if you doubt that the Catholic Church

was set up as a rape laundering scheme by Roman noblemen pedophiles. What more evidence do you need, man? I just gave you another one. All the ones I gave you in that previous episode. If you haven't listened to it, go back and listen to it. And also I'm bringing up Vatican citizen. Isn't that a coincidence? They have their own city with their own police force, their own laws, and they are not subject to any laws in the world. No human rights, no inspections, nothing. Rock, I need you to take a break from ballers on HBO, okay?

Hook up with Tim Kennedy down there in Texas and Joe Rogan, and you guys fucking jujitsu and shoot your way into the Vatican, and rescue those children who have been gathered up from the streets of Romania and Bulgaria and Mexico and flown first class while they were watching Cocom Melon. That's how they distract them with Cocoa Melon. I mean, you ever watch a kid watch Cocoa Melon? I'm not even sure if they can even be aware that they're being raped. They're so captivated by Cocoa Melon.

And we need to stop this. Does anyone really care? This is the things we've been caring about and people have been taking the street about. Systemic racism in America, which does not exist anymore. I'm just going to say that. Once you have a president, a Supreme Court justice, a secretary of defense, and 12% of Congress, which is on par with the 12% population that the African-American community makes up countrywide, 12% in Congress. We got a little to go in the Senate, but 12% of Congress is African-American. That is not systemic racism anymore. You got black mayors, police chiefs,

superintendents, billionaires, millionaires. There is racism for sure. There is historic racism. There's racist conditioning. There is innate racism. There's learned racism. But there is not systemic racism anymore. Dr. Dre is a fucking billionaire. So is Jay-Z. OJ Simpson got off from chopping off a white woman's head can you that

i'm glad that happened that it showed the most progress in the history of this country no bigger benchmark for the erosion of systemic racism than a black man getting away with killing a blonde-haired white woman. We don't even take kindly to when a blonde woman is killed by a white man with blonde hair. Blonde women are off limits, and for generations,

for fucking generations, black people were framed for touching white women. The Tulsa Massacre, one of the biggest and most important events in American history to show systemic racism, was initiated by an accusation that a black man put his hands on a white woman so that image that historical uh dog whistle was and has been an indication of systemic racism but once the oj simpson trial happened that marked a turn of the key from white privilege to rich privilege.

I mean, Dr. Dre punched a woman and he's okay. If you got money now, you can get off. Color doesn't matter. Money does. Money. I mean, Clarence Thomas

put a pubic hair on a Coke can and he's still in the supreme court i don't think he did it um that's a weird accusation we've talked about that other podcast yeah he was hitting on me so he took a pubic hair and put it on my coke can that that's not really how you hit on chicks especially black dudes they go damn yo ma let me holler at you for a minute they don't go can I put a pubic hair on your cut? That's some weird white nerdy shit to put a pubic hair. That's some incel white kid who sniffs his hand and sniffs seats and doesn't know and never talked to a woman in his life. That's his move.

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this country, ironically, has improved tremendously tremendously when a black man can get away with cutting off a white woman's head like obviously cutting off her head and she had blonde hair which is no no i mean that's the only reason we know amanda knox's name you know what i'm saying do you think if uh do you think if uh let's say a tanisha was in prison in italy it would have been as big as big news no and maybe that is evidence of still systemic racism i don't know what i'm talking about maybe it's a little bit of both but it definitely was a sign of progress that oj can play golf now and there was a white woman's head who was just rolling around on the fucking front lawn of his old house

that he had to pay for while she was in it. Kid plays golf now. So we have all these things that aren't real that we take to the streets for, you know? Racism is real. You could take the streets over that. But systemic racism and this fucking pay gap shit isn't really real. You can take the streets over that. But systemic racism and this fucking pay gap shit

isn't really real. When you look in the numbers, what are they fighting over? A quarter? What is it? Women get 75 cents to the man's dollar and you tell me that has nothing to do with nature

or anatomically anchored things like women wanting to fucking take care of their kids or whatever or choosing different careers. There's all these confounding factors that probably contribute to that 25 cents. I remember I was hearing that bullshit about the comedy community, how it was like sexist. And I'm like, I can't remember when I, the last time I had a network meeting with guys, they were all women. You look at the clubs, they were all booked by women in comedy.

So I was like, where is this sexism that I see? Not to say there isn't sexism, not to say there isn't racism. Systemic is a different issue. That means it's like law of the land. That's not the case anymore. Can't we celebrate progress as well as still trying to stamp out

whatever vestiges of it are left? But to continually call it systematic and make the problems bigger than they are when the stats and facts don't match up ain't helping nobody. But you know what stats do actually match up? The rape numbers from the Catholic Church. That's a real thing.

There's no way you can interpret that. There's no way Ben Shapiro could get on there and be like, excuse me, that is not, when you look at the facts,

there's only one fucking, police are killing much more white people than black people. There's not even systematic police brutality. If you look at the pocketbook, slavery was a long time ago,

so black people have no excuse. There has to be something for cultural gun violence. He can't even do that with the Catholic Church. There's no rationalization or counter arguments. You're talking about an epidemic of

pedophilia rape. So my theory makes a lot of sense that the Catholic Church was set up as a cover to do this, being the primary purpose of the Catholic Church. It is wild that we did that episode. I got demonetized on Instagram for it. And then a fucking week later, Facebook is under fire for its evil shit.

And the Catholic Church is yet again found to have raped 330,000 how many fill a football stadium? 18K? so basically 330,000 would sell out an NFL stadium of of all the stadiums the whole season that's like filling 17 games

maybe a couple of seasons I'm no mathematician. What a week. How are they going to clean this up, baby? They better hire Coca-Cola's PR arm. They better hire whoever Philip Morris uses to get through this. Now let's talk about that Facebook. Frances Hagen, who also happens to be a white woman with blonde hair, Harvard educated, peace,

former product manager at Facebook, was secretly copying papers. This was a big week for leaks. We got the Pandora papers and we got the Facebook papers. Okay, we'll call them the Zuckerberg papers, the Zuck, the Zuck papers. So she testified in front of Congress saying that Facebook is aware that its algorithms are set up to eventually lead these women down these

unhealthy rabbit holes of anorexia and depression. We already knew that from watching The Social Dilemma. If you haven't watched that on Facebook, you got to do it. There's already been a few former employees of these tech companies have said these algorithms are set up to keep you on there and to addict you. And they're aware the dopamine hits that you chase and that their interfaces create and their systems create and they're set up to do that. So we already know

and we already all know how addictive the internet is. I mean, when's the last time you took a shit without your phone? I dare you, try it. You will have a panic attack on the toilet bowl, okay? I've taken,

one time I was in the bathroom for a day and I lost time because I was watching the full first season of The Wire. These are some of the dark sides to technology. So we've been aware of this. So, but here's the thing. I don't know who has the better argument.

So undoubtedly what she's saying is true, that Facebook is aware, as she's saying she's making an analogy to the tobacco industry and saying that as the tobacco industry was aware that their products were addictive and caused cancer, Facebook is aware that it causes

depression, anorexia, and divisiveness, which was a big one, which we all know. These algorithms feed extremism, and as someone like myself, who likes to make fun of everybody, I can tell you for a fact, all the social media algorithms do not favor someone like myself who does that. They favor people who go fucking Tim Pool hard right, move to a compound and grab a couple of guns and say coronavirus is a fucking, is Biden juice, or to the hard left where you go, excuse me, sir, do you

have a mask? Put your fucking mask on, okay? I live across the street and I'm looking at you through the window and you're not wearing a mask in your living room. Do you not care about people? and you're not wearing a mask in your living room. Do you not care about people? Obviously, the algorithm favors those two and gives them more visibility

because they rile people up. We've made that point on this podcast about how the algorithm, much like advertisers, like to tie an emotion to their product, right? Their product is keeping you online. Their product is the products they sell. The product is their social media platform and that's what they're selling. And they tie your

emotions to it because we're emotional. Humans are not rational. Humans are not rational. That's often a misnomer. Just like people misunderstand Darwinism when they say the strong survive. It's not the strongest that survive. It's the ones who adapt to change best. Oftentimes, the strongest of a previous environment will die off, and the weaker from that environment will go on because they are more suited for the new environment. So it's not the strongest that survive. So that is something that is often misunderstood as well. What was the point?

Before I went to the analogy, I knew I was going to lose it. What was the first analogy I was making? Yeah, so we're, oh, the point that we're often considered, oh, man is the only animal capable of reason. The key word there is capable of reason. Doesn't mean we're inn considered, oh man, is the only animal capable of reason. The key word there is capable of reason. Doesn't mean we're innately reasonable. We are innately emotional. That is innate. That is why we're so easily manipulated, because we're emotional. Reason has to be developed. Logic and reason have to be developed to protect and control your emotions.

And that is when you become a top level toot. That is when you become a civilized human. An evolved human is when you develop your reason. That needs to be taught. That needs to be developed. So advertisers know this. Sophists, your online pundits, a lot of which couldn't even graduate college,

but yet they figured out politics. And social media outlets, that's what they rely on, tying an emotion to their product so you get sucked in. I just explained it to you. We're aware of it. We can't stop because we're addicted.

So she shed light on that officially, in i just explained it to you we're aware of it we can't stop because we're addicted so she shed light on that officially revealed these documents from facebook that facebook knows about this but now let's go to the con the other side zuckerberg side okay and a lot of people are going to say i'm a friend a lot of people watching this i understand where you came from you know me either from the joe rogan podcast or a few other podcasts. And you're definitely anti-vax, which also means you're anti-this. Me promoting any Jew. Let's talk about something that's still around as well, anti-Semitism. That train is never late.

So let me take Mark Zuckerberg's back for a little bit. He responded by saying, first of all, I'll just say the numbers. The numbers were like, they saw a 13 to 17% uptick in suicide or suicidal thoughts or depression or however they measured it. 13 to 17%.

That's probably an increase. Not substantial. Is that Facebook's fault? Is that society's fault? Was cable news and magazines not doing the same thing? Right? Me and Jesse used to say, we used to quote,

because Jesse was from advertising. He still is. Everybody's got to make a buck. We used to say, who are the biggest liars? Remember, men or women? And we go, no, media is the biggest liars. Because Jesse used to work in media. Still does.

Got to make a buck. But airbrushing and what they do. When you see the original photo of whatever woman you're seeing on the cover, and then you see the product that actually goes on the magazine, that's causing anorexia. That's causing depression.xia. That's causing depression. So has it really changed that it's gone from print to digital? Probably not. Probably not. So this is when you go, hmm, maybe this is the family that needs to create a stronger

confidence in these girls. Maybe daddy needs to, you know, be in the life a little bit more, or maybe society as a whole needs to change. He makes a decent point. Were the numbers of depressed women any lower when it was just magazines and billboards and commercials? And if they were lower, was it lower because there was less access to that? It wasn't as prevalent. You couldn't look at it every day. You had to buy a magazine. You had to, you know,

it was a little harder to come in contact with those images, stories, et cetera. Very strong argument to be made there. In conclusion, there really is no difference. It's just Facebook is more efficacious and that's why the numbers have gone up and this is more of a societal problem or an innate female problem because you guys got smaller brains and are more insecure and more vain that's possible too i mean men don't walk around with

fucking makeup on like they're intermission during a play we don't wear fucking high heels because we're upset about how short we are and how our legs look. We don't get ass implants and tit implants. Oh, that's because of men. We would fuck you as you are. Whatever you present, we'd fuck.

You are competing with each other. Don't bullshit me. I wasn't born yesterday. Don't bullshit me. If women got together tomorrow and said, no more makeup, you think guys would stop fucking you? And who do you think buys Us Weekly or looks at that fucking anorexia diet plan shit? Is it guys? I don't think so. I don't know one straight man that's ever picked up a copy of Us Weekly to see the things that celebrities do. I don't know one man who tunes into the E! Channel to check out what's going on on the red carpet.

So cut the bullshit, ladies. Cut the fucking bullshit. You have the power. You got the pussies. We want them. It's a nice, warm, hot pocket. We want to get cozy in there. A nice, self-lubricating hole that we can fuck.

And you got nice titties. Motor bonus. Soft lips. Nice feet that I want to plug in my mouth. Like a pacifier. So cut the bullshit. There's a point to be made there. That's what he's saying, Zuckerberg. He's also saying, you're saying that my social media site is responsible for the divisiveness in this country. He made a long

statement. I like how he started. Hey, everyone, because he knows everyone's on Facebook. So why not call them everyone? Hey, everyone, sorry about that outage when you didn't know what to do with yourself, Facebook also got hacked by probably the CCP for a couple hours, went down, and everyone just went to Twitter, you know, it was wild, Facebook and Instagram were down for like six hours, and so I looked at my family a little bit, which was cool, but I couldn't wait to get back. It was good to see them. So he says a long statement. I'm not going to read the whole thing,

but essentially he says, Mark Zuckerberg is saying that if his platform is to be blamed, the argument that we deliberately push content that makes people angry for profit profit is deeply illogical that's bullshit that's what you call bullshit okay i'm gonna call it bullshit because i'm an evolved human being some of my viewers are gonna go that's zionist bullshit you know we can't pretend like that's not one of the biggest conspiracies i just watched david chappelle's fucking special and it was hilarious but he used the term space

jews a few times still funny but let's act like i i'm not gonna act like i don't think dave chappelle's anti-semitic he is doesn't mean he's not funny can we can we appreciate people's flaws he's a funny kid he doesn't like jews big deal he's not funny. Can we appreciate people's flaws? He's a funny kid. He doesn't like Jews. Big deal, he's a fucking Muslim. I mean, if I was a Muslim, I may not like Jews either. I hate them both.

And I hate Dave Chappelle as a person. I never met him, but if I had met him, I probably wouldn't like him because he'd be fucking wearing his Chappelle chain, calling himself the goat, and I'd be like, you're a fucking human who shits. Can you just shut the fuck up? I hate everybody. Equally. I'm a socialist

with my hate. But he's the goat. He's funny. Jokes aside. What he's essentially saying is if my platform causes divisiveness, why are we not seeing that divisiveness in other countries that have the same facebook usage very good point very good point there has to be some cultural underpinnings to this, why aren't all these other countries fucking

tearing each other at the throat? Why is there, why is there no Swedish Q-nan called Hunsehuden? You ever hear Swedish? It sounds like, I've been to Scandinavia so many times. Swedish just sounds like

somebody put an ice cube down your shirt, and you go, Oh, Why don't we see a Swedish QAnon? You know? And then there's some Swede watching, going,

We have a right-wing party. You've always had a right-wing party. Europe is the only place that likes to call us racist. And then you go to one of their soccer games and there's just a Hail Hitler fucking section. And then one of your politicians, you're like, oh yeah, that's just the Nazi party. And you're like, whoa,

I think you guys are taking democracy a little too far. Democracy on its own doesn't work. We're not even a real democracy. We're a republic. It needs to be checked. Like all things need to be checked. The most genius idea the founding fathers had was checks and balances.

The other ideas were taken from previous countries, right? John Locke's common law, individual lights from the enlightenment thinkers, and then of course, from the Greeks, democracy, and the republic here, which the Italians stole

when they conquered us you dirty fucking wops I haven't forgotten what you did in World War II and Mussolini's fucking granddaughter just got the most votes in the city council in one of her fucking cities

how do you like them apples? fucking Italians love fascism so it's a good point I mean is Facebook to blame is Facebook to blame first of all who the fuck is still on Facebook okay

but also the big thing is Instagram that they're owned by Instagram now I don't know why my suggestion page on Instagram is only hot female tennis players fucking Instagram booty models, and MMA videos. Do you know that?

Do you know that the suggestion page, when you go to your search page, what the algorithm does is it gives you the things that they feel like you watch the most or you're most likely to watch? And so they've decided that's me. Even though I'm constantly looking at history stuff, I'm constantly looking at philosophical quotes, I'm constantly stalking people's page like britney spears just to feel better about myself and but you know that's my page my search page is just mma fights you know how many times i've watched uh i want to

apologize to absolutely nobody the double champ does with the i've already seen the video instagram show me something new. I also like boxing and I like basketball. Okay? I also like comedians. Show me some comedians, phages. Why is it only fucking hot chicks and MMA? This is one of those things

where you just learn about yourself because AI is never wrong. I'm just probably not aware of how much women and fighting videos I watch so I'm not going to argue with you Zuckerberg or your fucking AI matrix program that just follows us all around we're almost living in the matrix now

where there's going to be AI bots you know we get limited ads on the armless Nazi which is a sketch we did I posted that limited ads because the word Nazis in it you can't explain context and nuance on the internet and everyone is acting like i believe like everyone's becoming like ai bots where they can't you can't follow an account like for example candace owens overall i think she's a fucking she's wild but she'll say one thing i agree with

and then she'll say something i disagree with and i'll be able to follow her and think she's a fucking, she's wild. But she'll say one thing I agree with, and then she'll say something I disagree with. And I'll be able to follow her. And because she's not my own family, I don't feel that much emotion about it. I don't go, fuck, we gotta hang up Candace Owens. And I don't go, we gotta follow Candace Owens. I don't do either one. Because I'm an adult.

There has to be room for adult conversation online. This is crazy. They should make Facebook kids, Instagram kids, this is crazy they should make facebook kids instagram kids what which is what they were about to do before this leak and this testimony in front of our representatives happened from francis hagen who's a piece so now facebook is holding off on that to figure out how they are going to defend themselves against the slandering, the slandering.

It's an interesting issue. It is an interesting issue, you know? Why aren't they saying stalkings are up 40%? Because that's usually what people use Facebook for is to stalk exes and see what they're up to. Okay? I always like looking on Facebook at people we grew up with

or I went to high school with and going, damn, those women look old. Nature's cruel. Women just don't age as good as men. Take it up. If there is someone who's systemically sexist, his name is G-O-D.

And there is good evidence that God is a man because why the fuck can men look so good in their 60s and women look like grapes? Sorry, I meant to say raisins. Men look like grapes when they're 60 and women look like raisins. It's because nature's cruel, man. Oh, this episode's going to get a lot of hate. So that's where we are. Big news. Leaks. You know, we had a lot of leaks this week. Catholic Church leaks.

300,000, blah, blah, blah. Getting raped. Facebook. They know that their product is addictive and causing women to have more suicidal thoughts, et cetera, depression, anorexia, divisiveness, which is the big one, political divisiveness. And then we had the third leak

that people care the least about, the Pandora Papers. Now, you hear the word Pandora, you're going, okay, what were the Pandora Papers? Did they figure out what my John Lennon channel is all about? No, not the Pandora app. The Pandora Papers was a leak about how all these elites around the world, much like the Panama Papers and all the other previous leaks about what elites do to tax evade. This is such a major issue that causes the world problems. The only people who pay taxes are the middle class. And without a middle class, your country's fucked.

Without a strongly publicly educated middle class, your country's fucked. And a strongly publicly educated middle class, your country's fucked. And so that's what's been happening. The rich set up these offshore accounts and they hide their money. They set up all these trusts. That was also part of the Panama Papers in North Dakota and wherever the fuck all these flyover states nobody gives a shit about. People set up these trusts to hide their money. That's the whole purpose of an accountant is to help you tax evade. That's what they do. You sit down with your accountant and say, okay, what can we get away with? And the rich do it the best because they have the most money. And so the enterprises that are set up to help you tax evade profit a lot when they help these rich people tax evade.

And a lot of countries have become countries like Luxembourg and Switzerland, you know. I mean, Roger Federer was raised on fucking tax evading money that cleans those streets, dirtbag. Because their havens, their Cayman Islands, you know, the British Virgin Islands

or whatever British other shit that they have, these outposts where the laws are different and rich people can essentially hide their money. So the Panama Papers essentially,

I mean, I'm sorry, the Pandora Papers much like the Panama Papers. Panama and other country, they do it guess who was in there too Shakira so Shakira

Shakira she's hiding her money it's a problem man it's a problem this is what gives AOC and some of these people life because they're going look at this shit man

these people aren't paying any taxes and they're fucking right man they're going, look at this shit, man. These people aren't paying any taxes. And they're fucking right, man. They're right. The poor don't pay taxes because they don't have any money. So they collect taxes because you got to have a heart. You can't just let some poor person

go to the hospital and fucking die. And then the middle class gets angry. They get angry because they're paying for the poor people because they're the only ones whose money can be tracked because they don't have enough money for an offshore account to be interested in them. So their money is trackable. So they have to pay their fucking taxes. So the rich don't pay taxes, the poor don't pay taxes, and the fucking middle class pay taxes.

You. And who are you mad at? The Jews? You don't even know who your enemy is. It's the rich. The rich come in all shapes and sizes and colors and they party together. Shakira's not Jewish. So stop.

Your brain is just not strong enough to understand what's going on so you just point to the Jews because you're stupid. You're a dumb fuck. And in the words of the great Tim Dillon, it's not even the Jews. It's the Chinese you should be wearing.

You guys are so stupid. You don't even know who owns you. Sarah Silverman finally came out on her podcast, which I'm sure gets millions of fucking listeners of young people who live in cities and don't have jobs. She finally came out and said something how she was disappointed in the squad over the Iron Dome voting

because of very good reason. She goes, wait a second, you guys are against the funding of something that defends against people shooting rockets at civilians seems like you care about one bunch of civilians and not the other she makes a decent point i mean if you take away the iron dome if you take away the iron dome which just defends against Hamas rockets, it's a defensive apparatus, military apparatus, then what do you think Israel's going to do when those rockets go off? I'll tell you, sometimes the best defense is a good offense. That's what's going to happen.

And she's saying, what, you don't care about those citizens? And then she's also going, she said, I never hear you guys talk about about those citizens? And then she's also going, she said, I never hear you guys talk about Hamas. I never hear you talk about Hamas and how they oppress their people and how they're shooting rockets at civilians. And it was very difficult for Sarah. It was very difficult for her because she loves the squad. She loved the tax, the rich dress. She loves Ilhan Omar who was caught on camera recently saying she was only wearing a mask because there was a right wing journalist following her. And afterwards she probably went whoopsie, whoopsie,

whoopsie, whoopsie, whoopsie. She loves Ilhan Omar. So it's very difficult for her. She probably really cried and she knew that she was going to piss off a lot of her fan base. Sarah?

Hi, my name is Giannis Pappas. Welcome to the club. Your numbers are about to go down. You're about to get dragged by some of your own audience. I get dragged by some of my own audience because I give them yo-vid. You're getting dragged by your own audience. I get dragged by some of my own audience because I give them yo-vid. You're getting dragged

by your own audience because you said something un-woke. You got un-woke for a second and you dare to criticize Destiny's Child. Destiny's Child. There's one rule to wokeness. You do not. There's one rule to wokeness you do not

there's one rule to American pop culture you never fucking criticize Queen B you can't say anything bad about Beyonce she's above it she's Queen B when Jay-Z fucking got caught cheating on her which is

is there anyone batting outside of his league more than Jay-Z I mean the motherfucker's got helicopter hair and he looks like a camel which is, is there anyone batting outside of his league more than Jay-Z? I mean, motherfucker's got helicopter hair and he looks like a camel. And he has one of the biggest dime pieces to ever walk the face of the earth on his arm, who he cheated on with some fucking dumb bitch. And all the world took whose side? Queen B.

Because you don't fuck with Queen B. And if you're woke, you don't fuck with Queen B. Okay? And if you're woke, you don't fuck with Queen B. The Beyonce of the squad. AOC. So Sarah, be careful. When you walk in public now to do your next show,

okay? When David Cross has his next fucking show at some bar that smells like spilt beer and wet dogs, and you get on stage you might hear a shame shame shame they might start throwing they might start throwing pieces of pig at you they might actually someone might try to put your cheese and meat together in a sandwich there might be flying yarmulkes that get thrown at you.

So be careful out there. Oh yeah, that was when she did Blackface. I know why she got so woke. By the way, let me tell you something. Sarah Silverman to me is one of the funniest comics. I enjoy Sarah Silverman. But it's just kind of transparent when people get rich and shit

and like they're in Hollywood, they don't want to lose anything. So she got really woke and she got really woke as a cover because she was like, please don't dig in my past and find when I use the N word and did black face.

There she is looking like Al Josen. Mammy, mammy, mammy, mammy. And now she's saying, now she's losing it and going, only Jews should play Jews. I mean, this is like, what are we doing here? How about, you know, we just shut up? How about we just shut the fuck up? You know what I mean? It's art. It's not politics. It's art. As the great David Chappelle said in his last special, it's art. You're free to interpret it as you want, you know? What's next? You're not

going to be able to paint a black person or a Puerto Rican person or a Jewish person if you're not Jewish. That's essentially what this bullshit is. Just let talented people do what talented people do, especially now that everyone has a venue and an opportunity with the internet to make what they want to make. Stop reading so much into shit and trying to bully people out of being talented. That's what's happened. It's all these fucking people

who are nervous about people finding out. It's like it's become this like purge, this woke purge, the same way like McCarthyism used to be. It's like, if you found out you said anything socialist, you're fucking going to jail. Now it's like, if we found out you said anything unwoke, you're going to jail.

That's the one thing that's going on the second part of it is it's mediocre to less than talented people wanting to get rid of talented people so then they could become successful you can't call what you do comedy if fucking the great comics are still around because you it's obviously shit if you compare it to someone who's actually funny who happens to maybe like jerking off in front of women in a hotel room after he asks.

You can't say he wasn't the GOAT. He is. Now, Bill Cosby's canceling. If he did that, seems like he did. I don't know. That's a little crossing the line.

But the Louis CK one creepy immoral maybe but criminal hands up I don't think so again context

nuance something that's just gone in this era also redemption gone you can't come back after that you're done your persona non-chrana look at louis he made a funny joke about it you know what'd he say he

says i love to be alone you know something so he made a funny joke about it but i don't know if he did it to my daughter maybe i'd feel different so i So I get it, I get it. But it doesn't mean you fucking, if the guy didn't break a law, you know? It's like, everyone's like, what happened to Jesus? He's without sin, cast the first stone. I mean, we've all done shit. So unless you've done something illegal, you might wanna start trying to forgive guys.

Or maybe not, I don't care. I'm just filling content. I haven't looked. Oh my God. My wife just texted me, said my daughter stood by herself. Thank God. Let's just hope she's not autistic now. That's yet to be seen. That kicks in a little later, right? I think we would have known by now. Yeah. Hot to my door yeah I mean Louis CK didn't even touch the women he didn't touch anyone the priests are touching the kids

and church is open but Louis CK can't work bananas anymore Jay Harvin 15 you can't ask to jerk off in front of someone when you have red hair no one is trying to see the magna fumes. So a lot of leaks. A lot of leaks.

We got more. The CIA, it's been leaked, has been losing dozens of informants because they've been getting executed by rival spy agencies.

I got to tell you, I don't know if this is news. That's just more of a hazard of the job, no? I mean, you're going to get executed. Maybe that's just evidence that we're not doing good anymore. You know? American education is such shit, we just ask our spies to go over there with a Texas accent now. Hey, how y'all doing? My

name is Alshari Abadi. What's going on, man? Yeah, I'm a Muslim. I'm just here to integrate with y'all. You know, I feel like Muhammad is my prophet, you know. My name is Muhammad Albali. That's right. I'm just fitting in with y'all. No suspicion at all. Here to get some information. I'm just a journalist, man, from Syria. I mean, regularly educated people in Norway could be better spies and assimilate better because they're taught a few languages. Here, we're kind of taught to speak English and then a few years of Spanish where we learn how to say el muchacho es guapo and then it ends there. So if we don't need any spies

who can speak broken Spanish, we're fucked. Can you imagine our Russians going in there? Hey, how you doing? What's going on? My name's Jason Vladimir Busalazluni. I'm here, man. I just love your country. And man, I'm one of you. My mother's Russian. My dad's Russian. You know, I was raised in the United States for one year. That's why I

got this little draw because I'm a Dallas Cowboys fan. Man, America's not all bad. They're decent at football. But other than that, man, I'm a commie all the way and I love Putin. I love giving her Putin. And they go, hands up, you're a spy. We found you out. It's like that scene in Quentin Tarantino's

movie Inglourious Bastards. You had the wrong pronunciation. Where's that pronunciation from? And then they go, well, uh, if I'm going to be going out, y'all mind if I, if I go out speaking to swampland, I got a gun pointed at your nuts too, brother. Shit. We're Americans. We love guns. I turned my dick into a gun gun so i'm not even holding one brother i got that new fucking boeing made dick gun i'd rather use my dick to shoot than fuck anyway so it's pointed right at you under the table back vladimir since we're going out do you mind if i eat this

taco bell since we're going out this primo taco bell I replaced the the high level scotch with a taco bell gordito so yeah I think we've there's been a lot of spies who've been being executed

so we we are losing our grip on what's going on there. And espionage is very important in the geopolitical sphere. Okay. So America's just, a lot of our institutions aren't at the top anymore. And espionage looks like is also sliding down. Good news though, President Xi, as I like to call him, the Chinese John Gotti, and Biden, after it looked like Taiwan and China were going to go to war, again, news that barely makes American headlines, because someone called someone Xi instead of they.

Chinese were flying air warplanes over Taiwanese airspace and Taiwan started asking America and Australia for help and were preparing for war. But it seems like for now, Biden and President Xi have both agreed to abide by the Taiwan Agreement in 1979,

which basically says, hey, man, cool it. Okay, this is going to continue to be a de facto independent country. Basically, our proxy will all do business, and we will abide by the de facto because it's not recognized as a country. It's still part of China essentially, but a de facto independent country, Taiwan. And President Xi agreed. So that's good news for the time being.

That's good news for the time being that there's not a war because that could really trigger a domino effect of world war. China, Russia, North Korea. This could be China just realizing, hey, we need to arm up a little bit more. We need to continue to arm Pakistan a little more. Then Pakistan gets involved because they're aligned with China. It could be bad. It's a hotspot. If there's going to be a world war three, God, I hate to be right, but it's going to either obviously start in the Middle East. If there's going to be a World War III, God, I hate to be right, but it's going to either obviously start in the Middle East. It's not going to be fucking the Balkans

like it was last time where Ferdinand was shot. It's going to happen either in the Middle East or over fucking Hong Kong and Taiwan. So for now, that seems safe. That is good news. I know I'm always the harbinger of bad news on here, but let's just say that is good news. No matter I'm always the harbinger of bad news on here, but let's just say that is good news. No matter what your fucking

political leanings are, that is good news. Someone just said world, world, world war. Yas! I haven't gone to the chat today because I just,

I got into a rhythm because I could hear myself think without Drew. I'm just kidding. We love you, Drew. I don't know where you are today. JayHarvin15, people complain about Giannis, but he's done what he's always done. And that's why he got the COVID vaccine. The kid got shot in 2001 and he's still getting shot now. I like shots. I like shots. The great Jay Harbin, 15. Follow him on Instagram now. Kid's got bars. William Shatner's going to space.

He's 90 years old. He's going up with Jeff Bezos. So, Captain... What was his name? Captain Quebec? What was his name? What was his name? Captain Quebec, what was his name? What was his name? Captain O'Hanlon? Captain Kirk.

God, they're still calling him Captain Kirk. He's 90. They didn't even have the decency to call him the guy from the Priceline commercials. Still Captain Kirk. It's wild. like michael richards will always just be known as kramer and kramer and his n-word play that he put on um so captain kirk is going to space they're going 66 miles up and they're going to space for 10 minutes. Look, capitalism to me is the best, worst, best, worst system, right? Just like democracy is the

best, worst system because in reality, that's why checks and balances is the best thing because you need that to balance all these best worst systems because once you impregnate an ideal into reality, it's imperfect and subject to corruption. That's why you need checks and balances. That's the only way to do it. And even that needs to be watched. It's constantly, it's like a Quentin Tarantino movie.

Everyone's got to be pointing a gun at everyone else's head. The legislative body has to be pointing a gun at the executive branch. The executive branch has to be pointing a gun at them. They got to be pointing a gun at the Supreme Court and the Supreme Court has to be pointing a gun at them. They got to be pointing a gun at the Supreme Court and the Supreme Court has to be pointing a gun at both of them. That's the only way it works. Mutually assured destruction. But in light of me being a fan of capitalism to the extent that I feel like so far it's the best worst system, I do think we should put a gun to Jeff Bezos' head and say enough.

You're donating a billion to help fight global warming, but we're not going to let you continue to spend millions of dollars to give Captain Kirk a fucking joyride for 10 minutes when he's 90 years old. The kid's going to drop dead tomorrow. He's not even going to be able to enjoy the experience. If anything, why don't you bring a fucking disenfranchised teenager up there? Do these people not have any PR arms or do they get so rich, powerful, and arrogant that they just think they can give fucking Captain Kirk a joyride at 90 and people aren't going to be pissed?

What you do is you go to some fucking poor neighborhood and you say some kid, who's dreaming about going to space? You know what kind of, the liberal press will eat that up. I mean, Jeff, let me help you. Liberals hate you. Socialists hate you. You're rubbing it in their face by taking a 90-year-old fucking William Shatner

to space for 10 minutes. It's not a great story. Jeff, let me help you. Hi, how you doing, Jeff? How you doing? My name is Larry Carpaccio, Saatchi and Saatchi. Yeah, you know those Budweiser's commercials? Do you know those Budweiser's commercials where there's a cute Dalmatian running next to a clown, Clonsdale horse. Okay. You know those commercials with the music, you start tearing up, you feel tingles, and then Budweiser comes on at the end. That's me. I'm the son of the guy who did the Marlboro Man. Yeah. You want to be a man? Well, men smoke cigs. Listen to me, Bezos. This is the right move. You want to joyride this space? You want to joyride

my friend? Like a fucking teenager who stole his dad's car? This is what you do. Let us go to East New York, Brooklyn. Find a kid who always... Look at that kid's eye. Look at that kid's eye. Jeff Bezos looks like two faces put together

as one. Looks like they take someone's face with eyes from one person and eyes from another and just put them together. I mean, he could look more evil. Jeff, take a fucking underprivileged kid. Okay, we'll make a commercial. We'll put him on a horse. Okay, there'll be fucking puppies running next to him. And you on the horse, on your way to the spaceship with Daryl, with little Daryl, with little Daryl Jenkins from East New York, who you take to space. HuffPo, yeah. Even AOC won't be able to criticize you spending all this money that could be going somewhere else because you evade taxes. Because you got all that surplus money that you avoid paying in taxes to take joy rides for 10 minutes.

To just essentially be a fucking AT&T satellite for 10 minutes and then pop right back down. I bet you it's not even that interesting. I bet you you go up and you're like, whoa, you get a little fucking seasick, nauseous. You're floating for a second. You look at the earth and you come back down. Big deal.

Big fucking deal. There's an argument to be made that we as the people could spend his excess money a little bit better, especially since we're paying for all of society, the roads, the police.

The middle class pays for everything. Well, this motherfucker is joyriding to space with Captain Kirk, who's 90. At least fucking Daryl Jenkins would be inspired and maybe become an astrophysicist

and has many years to enjoy the memory of joyriding with Jeff Bezos. But no, it's Captain Kirk who's going to be alive for one more week

who's going to be able to enjoy that memory for hours. And I bet you the experience is ruined by being in there with Jeff Bezos with his fucking nerdy giggle. Going, oh my God.

This is so wonderful. And his fucking eyes going there. One eye's looking at Saturn, the other eye's looking at fucking Greenland from above the atmosphere. NATO is actually also doing a good thing. They're targeting an asteroid. This is the first time they're targeting an asteroid that is supposed to come close to Earth to see if they can knock it off its course, which is something we're going to need, which is something I brought

up once in a college class, you know, because a lot of times some of the worst stuff ends up being the best stuff, right? It's like the internet and all that technology was designed and a lot of technology that we enjoy was designed by defense departments and initially was used as weapons or defense against weapons, internet being one of them and many other examples. And now we use them, you know, the body politic uses them for great, great stuff. The same thing could be true

for nuclear weapons, you know, or high level weapons about knocking an asteroid off its course that would fucking end us. Fin, finito.

So NASA's actually, that's money well spent in my opinion. A couple of guys going to sit on fucking the moon. People are like, why hasn't America been back to the moon since that one part?

Who gives a fuck? What are you doing on the moon? You're going to plant a flag? Who gives a fuck? Nobody can live on the moon. There's no point to go to the moon. Some of that shit's just stupid. I agree.

Americans did it once, and then they were like, we don't fuck it. They were just trying to race with the Russians because it was an arms race. Maybe they faked it. Who gives a fuck? But going to the moon is stupid. It's a waste of taxpayer money. But knocking an asteroid off its course that could hit the planet, that's money well spent. That's my point on that. So I hope they succeed because eventually an

asteroid will hit us again all you got to do is look at the moon unless you believe the earth is flat and the moon's flat unless you're Kyrie Irving and you're going to sit out

half the season because you're refusing your COVID vaccine and you want to go study more about how the earth is a table all you got to do is look at the moon and see how many craters

it has in it to know it's been fucking hit all you got to do is look at the Grand Canyon to know it craters it has in it to know it's been fucking hit. All you got to do is look at the Grand Canyon to know it's been hit. Was the Grand Canyon, I don't know what I'm talking about. I'm not a geologist. All you got to go look is other fucking craters.

We've been hit, motherfuckers. We've been hit. We don't want to get shot by fucking God's jism again. So this will be cool if they can do that. So I don't really have a lot of jokes on that. It's just like that's a cool thing. That is a cool fucking thing. And in college, I brought that up.

I was like, maybe those things will end up being good. It was like this socialist professor who was against our use of the atom bomb in Japan, and he got mad at me saying that, but I'm like, you know what? Nukes are already here. Maybe that type of technology will be used to knock an asteroid off its course,

which could be cool. And that's what they're about to do. So that's big news. Hopefully they do it. Of course, you guys aren't hearing all this shit because, you know, Jake Paul's considering who his next opponent's gonna be. I hope it's Beetlejuice.

Or Buster Douglas, who I interviewed for my other show, Unleashed. Let me tell you, wasn't the best interview. Kid's great. He's just, he doesn't have the charisma of a Mike Tyson

or a Ali. So, that's what's going on in the world today guys there was some oil spills in Cali and Texas I saw some tweets Texas has some oil spills supposedly right now

and I saw some liberal tweets people going Texas is the worst man it's just a mess down there and I wanted to be like did you read about the Cali spill in California your beloved California it's the Cali spill in California? Your beloved California? It's the biggest oil spill in decades.

So, just stop with the fucking oil. Is oil even dinosaur juice, or did they find out it's like not even dinosaur juice? It's like organisms. I don't know. So lastly, there was a school shooting in Texas

and it was a black guy for a change. I mean, I think they captured an 18-year-old black kid in his school, I think Add captured an 18-year-old black kid in his school. I think Addison or somewhere by Dallas. So there was finally a school shooting by a black guy, which is, it's really a white man's game. It's really a white kid's game. But since it was a black kid who shot, they do it differently.

He wasn't going there because somebody bullied him or he was shooting up the school. Somebody stepped on his sneakers. In my opinion, that's completely understandable. He had a target. He wasn't just going there to shoot up in rage. I mean, somebody fucking scuffed up his fucking threes. I joke, I kid. But nobody was killed, so I can make that joke. I think there was just a couple people hurt. Okay, one of them was a pregnant teacher, so I apologize. Pregnant teacher was hurt, but she was treated at the scene and not hospitalized,

so that's good. The baby will live. Pro-life there. Good story for Texas. There's a 15-year-old in critical condition, a 25-year-old male in good condition, and a teenage girl in good condition. So there's one kid who's in critical condition.

That might have been the kid who stepped on his sneakers. And there's some, of course there's some cell phone video of it. Because you know, why run when you can get a nice fucking viral video of the moment? But it didn't turn out bad. Here's the thing, black guys.

Don't appropriate our culture, okay? Keep your shit. You guys aren't school shooters, all right? When you're a school shooter, you can't shoot like that. You got to shoot like this. It's a white thing. I mean, to me, this is cultural appropriation. Somebody needs to sit this kid down and say,

have you heard the tenants of Robin DeAngelis and whatever his name is, Abraham? Have you read about critical race theory and white fragility? You are culturally appropriating a white teenager's game. Stay in your lane. School shootings, that's what we do. You know,

that's just one thing white teenagers do best. They don't go in there and get one critically injured. White guys, I mean that Las Vegas guy, I mean he shot up a whole concert. He put up some numbers.

Columbine kids, they put up some numbers. That would be a very dark sketch about some black kid who's interested in becoming a white school shooter and he goes to white school shooter school and it's taught by just a couple of incel white kids who teach him how to arm up and get him body armor and teach him military military paramilitary tactics

that they've learned online while they sit around and drink slurpees and eat tacos in suburbs and they have access to their right-wing dad's gun cabinet to this point it's been but again is this not progress? And we'll end here. Just like when OJ got away with cutting off his white woman's head, who you don't do, is it not progress that now black kids are allowed to be school shooters too? We've come a long way. We still got a long way to go. And I will not stop advocating until there is an equal amount

of black teenager school shooters as there are white shooters. Then we will know we have equality and women too. I want to see some women school shooters get in the game equality for all. Now for our most beloved listeners, our small business shout outs, Nate Linder, how are you my friend? Go to natelinder.com, okay? natelinder.com. With over 5 million managed in digital advertising, my man Nate Linder has just about as much experience in digital marketing game man, Nate Linder has just about as much experience in digital marketing game as my glue gun has in the toot game. So if you want to help your digital business, your website, whatever you're doing digital, hit up Nate Linder if you're listening to this podcast and you will get an amazing deal. If your business is not making money from the internet, well, it probably should.

Don't be too. Hit up natelinder.com and let him help you out with your digital marketing. He's the man. He's actually going to do some stuff for me. So I'm very excited about him. Then of course, we've got Andrew Cuomo's secretary. I love these fucking kids. Z Jammer Realty. Very simple. You're looking for a spot in Brooklyn for all your residential and commercial needs. Just hit up Z-Jama Realty.com. That is Z-Jama Realty.com and holler at these screwed in Jewish kids in Brooklyn. Then similarly, as you know, my boy also Grant Trower down in South Florida, granttrower.theatlanticrealtygroup.com, phone number 954-591-6465. You can follow him on the

gram at grant underscore trower. If you're looking for a spot in the great state of Florida, that's who you hit up if you listen to this podcast. No questions asked. Very simple. Similarly, if you're in the South Philly area and you need to catch your check or somebody else's check with a name that you forged, whatever, you walk in there with a piece of paper that has a number on it, this motherfucker will cash your check. Chris Minetti. There's no way I can't read this without on it, this motherfucker will cash your check. Chris Manetti. There's no way I can't read this without doing it like this. Call him on the phone.

No website, nothing. Okay? This is all about not getting the IRS involved. Take your fucking check down to Chris by calling him at 215-750-3730 and go see our boy, Christopher Manetti. Michael Hamlet Jr., thebronxbrand.com. I love it so much. Bronxbrand.com. Go look at all their original art prints, t-shirts, buy yourself something, get a piece of New York from the home of hip hop, check out the Bronx magazine, and put in the promo code fumes for 15% off your order, if you like original art, original t-shirts like I do, which you should, be original man, go get something from an original

artist and support them, it's better, don't go to some fucking store and get some dumb t-shirt, get something that someone fucking made who's a real artist. Bronxbrand.com. Michael Hamlet Jr., you are the man. Reese Ormond. How you doing, my brother? Okay? Reese Ormond is the boy at techvera.com.

For all your IT needs, you don't have to hire iTech personnel. You can just hire Techvera to do everything for you. Cybercrime, cybersecurity, a problem for you, boom. Anything IT, you don't need an IT department. All you got to do is hit up techvera.com and let Reese take care of you, my friend.

Then we got Eastside Cheesecakes, Julia and Gregory. I am waiting for their nationwide shipping. They say it's coming in weeks, so come on guys. People want those fucking cheesecakes, Julia and Gregory. I am waiting for their nationwide shipping. They say it's coming in weeks. So come on guys. People want those fucking cheesecakes. Do you know how many people from this podcast are going to order a cheesecake once you're nationwide? But if you're in the Los Angeles area right now, go get yourself an east side cheesecake. They are absolutely delicious and fresh. They make everything, including the cream cheese, themselves.

And it's absolutely amazing and you can get it at any Uncle Paulie's deli in the Los Angeles area. I think he's got three now. So Eastside Cheesecakes on the gram. Follow them, eastsidecheesecakes.com. Check out those cheesecakes. Start at the gram.

That's where the food porn starts and you will be addicted. I love looking at their cheesecakes. They make me hard. Aaron Lee, forTheFree.us down in Hawaii. You want to find out about local bands, events in Hawaii. Now everything's back up and running. Check out ForTheFree.us before you go to Hawaii or if you're interested in finding new musicians and bands in Hawaii. If you're a music nerd, go check out the scene in Hawaii. They are all things Hawaii,

all things music, for the free.us. Rob's Mental Playground, the kid just keeps selling art. He posted another sale to a long hailer. I want to thank you guys. It's almost like buying a piece of this podcast. So continue to support Rob at robsmentalplayground.com.

Rob's Mental Playground on the gram. And buy a fucking quirky painting or commission one. He'll make it for you. Or one of his dope t-shirts. And keep supporting Rob. Much appreciated. Go follow him on the gram. He's a funny kid.

Then we got Jared Z from the Stinkbox Tallahassee. You know the gram. He's a funny kid. Then we got Jared Z from the Stinkbox, Tallahassee. You know the deal. Exclusiveautoshipping.com. All right. He's based in Tallahassee, but he will be in San Antonio soon. And that's just one of his many lanes. I ship on and I can usually handle any route a customer gives me nationwide. Even Alaska, Puerto Rico, and Hawaii. I can also ship internationally. So the kid ships internationally. And listen, he's an ex-Catholic turned Christian. So there he goes. He got touched and he found the way out. So hit him up. Okay. It's very simple. Exclusiveautoshipping.com. Get your free quote right now from Jared.

Now, patreon.com slash yannilongdays. Let's read our new Patreon members. We are glad to have you guys. Okay, welcome to the Patreon at patreon.com. Our new long haulers, Tucker Part-Time Bo boomer, full-time fumer, shepherd. Then we got Steven Greenfield. No puss, puss, no puss, puss peruses a pound down right now. The proper approach is to chow and then plow. Then we got Samuel Stumpf like Donald Trump but his real name's Stumpf right Samuel Stumpf Sandro Sanchiani oh wow that is a sauce monkey bad Sandro Sanchiani and then funny. Maurice's Bean, AKA Steel Pipe Clitty.

We got Marcus. Welcome, guys. Patreon.com slash Yanni Long Days. Go join for bonus episodes. Become a long hauler. It's the move. See you next week. It's been a long day.