Yannis Pappas Hour - Rainbow Star of David

Episode Date: February 26, 2022

Yeah is an emotional leader and will swell your heart with wasdadealis. Is Brian Flores, former head coach of the Miami Dolphins the Edward Snowden of the NFL? Ever wonder where the term “Molly” comes from? What’s Positive K up to? A little trip down memory lane of the glory days of hip hop and the native tongue crew. The trucker rally in Canada is over did it help, hurt or was it even necessary? Who does Trudeau look like? Elon Musk is under fire for a few monkeys lost their lives to Neuro Link so wasdadealis with that, and finally the gay bill in Florida, the latest fascist proposal from the bipedal monkey of Florida. What the F….Lorida. Florida, it’s America’s penis. Enjoy!Sponsors:Babbel:https://www.babbel.comPromo code: LongdaysWealthfronthttps://invest.wealthfront.com/FUMES?utm_medium=podcast&utm_source=longdayswithyannispappas&utm_campaign=podcast_investYanni stand up tour dates & tickets: https://www.yannispappascomedy.comJoin for weekly Bonus episodes: https://www.patreon.com/yannilongdaysSubscribe to our clips page for podcast highlights https://youtube.com/channel/UCfMy34qIYYy7XiRaHKO1ykwThe show goes out every Saturday but while it's being recorded the show goes LIVE on Yannis' Instagram on Wednesdays.Come join in on the LONG DAY & Follow Yannis PappasInstagram - https://www.instagram.com/yannispappas/Twitter - https://twitter.com/yannispappas Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Hey, everybody. It's another week and another opportunity for us to give you nothing but the straight objective news. I know some of you get triggered when you hear news. It's traumatic for some people. I get it. A lot of people say, Yanni, can this not be a news podcast? I just want to escape.

I have one thing to say to you. If anyone who watches this podcast calls it anything but an escape, you need medication. You need to talk to a psychiatrist immediately. If you think that this is too real for you, my friend, you need Lipitor. That's for the heart, but you need something called lithium for the brain. You need to visit Merck and be farmed out.

The evil pharma. I hate pharma. I'd rather get voodoo done on me in Madagascar. They got the good stuff, baby. That's where they're curing COVID with smiles. Yanni's got a good episode for you today.

Of course, we got the world's famous finger painter, Jesse Scaturo, as I like to call him, Electron Fingers. And we got our Gen Infinity expert, Jared Harvin in the studio as well. Financial expert, COVID expert, political expert, sports expert, Jared Harvin in the studio as well, financial expert, COVID expert,

political expert, sports expert, gender expert, and also sociologist, also geometrist, as well as a physicist. So put your questions in his DMs, whatever they may be. He is an absolute physicist. He also is a journalist part-time and also a sex worker.

Of course, the Ukraine is dominating the, I was about to say holidays, because it is President's Day and I'm sure I'm not in contact with that many religious Jews, but I'm sure this is one of your holidays as well. One of the good things to consider if you ever go to a religious expo and the Jews are there, you do get a lot of holidays. It's not quite the amount of wives that the Mormons offer, but you will get a few more days off at work. So if you hate your job, throw a yarmulke on. Michigan is the number one economy right now of states over 2 million population in the country. You thought things got weird? Well, that's the weirdest thing i've heard all day cuz

okay michigan where they were selling houses for 13 nickels a couple years ago and flint was drinking dirty bath water is now on top that does not bode well for our competition with the reds uh elon musk Neuralink has a little bit of a problem when he killed some monkeys. Who doesn't kill some monkeys? Who doesn't kill monkeys when they experiment on their product? There's a few dead monkeys.

So what? So what? Okay? COVID killed almost a million evolved monkeys. We are chimps with sneakers. So tomato, tomato. There's a gay bill in Florida. All you can say about Florida is what the Florida instead of fuck.

Baby, it's a crazy one. And Florida does not disappoint. We will get into it. Basically, if you're gay, you're going to get outed. Put your rainbow star of David on because they want to know. China, of course. This is the Long Days podcast. So we will always cover something China.

In fact, eventually this will be done in Chinese. Mike Bloomberg. be done in Chinese. Mike Bloomberg, Mike Bloomberg puts a warning out to Democrats about what he thinks is going to be a midterm sweep by the red. Not only is the CCP red coming, but the fucking red conservatives are coming too. It's a British invasion, bubba's. The redcoats are coming, you dems. So you might as well get ready. Also, Brian Flores. Who's that? I don't remember. Who's Brian Flores? Coach of the Dolphins. Former coach of the Dolphins. Coach of the Dolphins. Is he really exposing a huge, huge mafia-like organization that is the NFL? Or is the kid just trying to get paid?

Either way, it's a damn good story. But not as good as a four-year-old son in Utah defending his pops, who was trying to recreate a reality show of falling down, who was upset they did not have his order at McDonald's, and he started trying to kill McDonald's employees until the cops show up. And then his four-year-old son, who apparently has a concealed carry permit,

started firing at the officers. Apparently that family watches Yellowstone every night, bubba's. This is Long Days. And just hang out for a little trip to the Fediverse. And let's meet a delicious maniac to take you through a what'sadalas. You know, it's funny. And the propaganda Get his kids screwed in Got a lot to say Aw shit It's about to be a long day It's a long day It's a long day You know it's funny

After every time I do those openings I always go to Jared and Jesse And I go was that good Was that decent As if they were gonna say no Before I start the episode To throw me into a tailspin Cause I'm what you call emotional

I'm an emotional leader Which means unstable You always wanna keep your emotions at bay and leave it your brain but Yanni can't do that my heart is swollen because I got myocarditis I got myocarditis from listening to the mainstream news

okay if you want that fucking swelling to go away in your cardiac system you listen to Rogan I just called it a cardiac system, which is probably a better name for it. I mean, why do we go cardiovascular? I can't wait for hip hop. Hip hop always comes up with a better, shorter, more concise, funner, more lit, cooler, however you want to say it word or expression for some

mm-hmm like you know oh my god this is great is not as good as lit it's not as good as yo fly jacket it's not as good as fresh oh my god it's a great jacket it's not as good as yo those are some fly threads yeah cardiovascular sounds a little corny. Cardiacal, now we're giving you something that you can rhyme with. Less corny, more to the point. I was working, eating this food, had some cardiac problems back on the block. Yeah.

Rappers can become doctors. I mean, they already love cough syrup. They do. Cough syrup is, what's the street name for that? It's lean Or promethazine Promethazine But they call it lean?

Yeah Lean is like you know The cough syrup With the Sprite Couple Jolly Ranchers You know Maybe put a little Klonopin in there

If you're feeling risky Yeah They always figure out A cool word Like Molly is Ecstasy Ecstasy

It's a little too head on What you feel Because from what I understand You feel ecstasy But I like that Black people took Ecstasy it's a little too head-on what you feel because from what i understand you feel ecstasy but i like that black people took ecstasy and just named it after a white girl they did it with and they called it molly yeah because you know what was the dude what was that dude name he's not that great a rapper but he was in that song with machine Gun Kelly. Steve-O. Call me Steve-O.

I'm a wild boy. I'm a wild boy. What was his name again? He's not a good rapper, but I feel like he one time just did Ecstasy with a white girl. Tyga, you think? No. What's his name?

Oh, Waka Flocka. It's Waka Flocka. I feel like Molly was named after Waka Flocka just did ecstasy with a white girl one time in St. Louis. And then he just called it Molly from there on in. And her name was Molly. You know? So they always come up with better words for stuff. You know what I mean? Fat.

To me, that's also good. Dope. Dope. Which is, you know, because dope comes from dope, which dope is good. Positive K, rag's also good. Dope. Dope. Which is, you know, because dope comes from dope, which dope is good. Positive K, ragamuffin. Ragamuffin.

I mean, you're going back to positive K because were you reincarnated? I feel like you're my age, you were killed, and then you were reincarnated in 1990. Yeah, I got jumped on the age train. How the fuck do you know who positive K is? I just, I'm tapped into it.

Dude, do you think there's any 24 year old right now, I could ask 100 out of 100 24 year old kids who Positive K is. Not one of them besides J Harvin 15,

the great Jared Harvin will tell you who Positive K, because I don't even think Positive K knows who Positive K is. If you went up to him and be like, who?

And he'd be like, oh yeah, that was, I did that one song in 1989. I'm not positive K anymore. I work at a dental office right now and I sell insurance. Yeah.

You ask a 24 year old kid what a positive K is and he'd think it's going to be a new drug on TikTok. Ben Sherman Ben Skimahorn says something very important right now in the comment roulette. He says, Yanni is the only news that matters. So that is, and Dom the Destroyer 5 says,

Special K, I'm down. Because it is also a drug. Jared is an early member of the native tongues. Yeah, you do got a native tongue vibe. If you were alive in like the 80s, 90s, you'd be native tongue. Your style would be. Explain to me what that is. That would be like, you'd have like native tongue vibe. If you were alive in like the 80s, 90s, you'd be native tongue. Your style would be- Explain to me what that is.

That would be like, you'd have like native tongues like- Backpacks. Backpacks. That's like the originators, the progenitor. If you don't know that word, it's like the originator of backpack rack was native tongue. Okay. So it was like, this was the crew.

Native Tongue was Tribe Called Quest, Black Sheep, Leaders of the New School, De La Soul. De La Soul was early. Who am I forgetting, Jess? You got them all pretty much.

I think I got them all. I'm missing one though. Black Sheep, but I'm missing one though. I'm missing one though. My friend, Chi. I went to camp with Chi Ali who was Drez's cousin he ended up going to jail

for murder but he's out he's a reformed man Chi what's up dog I haven't seen you since high school I ran into you

in Central Park Kwame Onyx was not in Kwame. Kwame, Polka Dots. Kwame was the type of kid. Kwame had so much talent, but then he had one album, two songs, and disappeared. But after Kwame came out,

everyone was wearing Polka Dots and platform shoes. Those were the early 90s when I swear to God you were alive and you just don't remember. Okay, what happened is you died early and then you were reincarnated. You have the soul of a native tongue backpacker. So yeah, they always come up with cool names for stuff. So let's start with Brian Flores

since we're talking about a mostly black sport or art form yeah football uh-huh um we were talking about rap mostly black mostly black once in a while you get your m&m here you get your third base here now there's a bunch of white rappers too many if you ask me i think black people as reparations should make the white rappers fight it out. Like the Joker scene where they break a stick and they say, we're only allowed three spots. You're allowed three spots. They treat it like a European team does American players. Because all European professional teams and teams around the world, they reserve most of their roster spots for homegrown talent.

And then they have two or three spots for foreign players I feel like the hip hop community should do the same thing for white rappers it's like we already got one we already got one we have Eminem so if you want to do white rap you have to fight Eminem to the death

you gotta wow me you gotta fight him to the death there's only three spots allowed Jack Harlow, who allowed allowed. Jack Harlow. Who allowed this? Jack Harlow's good, though. Everyone loves Jack Harlow. He's allowed to just have his government given name?

His name is Jackford, so he changed it up, which is rap. Right. Not going with your government name. And he's a smooth southern dude. People like that. Southern guys always went with their real names. Paul Wall. And then who was the other one? Mike Jones.

What happened to Mike Jones? I like that. I like Mike Jones. Mike Jones had one good song. Pow Wow had one good one. Pow Wow, I just called him. Southern guys just use their regular names. So he's from the South.

He's a decent rapper though, right? But should he have to get a fade? Or he can just keep rocking that fucking dude? No, representation, bro. You know Logic? Yeah. I used to like Logic. Who's the best white rapper of all time?

Best white rapper of all time? You're speaking for the black community as a representative right now, so don't fuck this up. Obviously Eminem. Right. You can't say anything other than that. Right.

You want me to sit here and say MGK? Who won that battle? Between MGK and Eminem. Eminem, but MGK got off some hits that you didn't expect him to get off. He did come a little harder, but then it's weird. After that battle, MGK just became a goth heavy metal rocker. He almost doesn't rap anymore. True, true.

Now he wears pearls on his face. Yeah, dates a white woman that looks like a vampire. Yeah, and like he's like doing like, he's doing like third eye blind music. Not even third eye blind, he's doing like 311 kind of like weird rock and roll. Yeah, painting his nails, hanging out with Ricky Velez and Pete Davidson

and shit like that. Yeah, Ray, Ray Jean says Eminem is weak sauce. Are you crazy, dog? That's like saying Michael Jordan was not a good basketball player. Rap God is probably one of the most lyrically incredible songs of all time. Rap God is nuts. When you listen to it, you're going like, what the fuck am I listening to?

How is this even possible? Someone said, I need MGK's pearls to hide the bags under my eyes. MGK became black mascara wearing fruit cup of a kid. See, that's what I like when I read comment roulette. You get a good one. MGK became black mascara wearing fruit cup of a kid. See, that's what I like when I read comment roulette. You get a good one. That one comes from Michael Taylor Mee who says, MGK became a black mascara wearing fruit cup of a kid.

Calling someone a fruit cup of a kid, that's a 10. So that's much appreciated. So Brian Flores is the former head coach of the Miami Dolphins. Whether you're a football fan or not, most of you are. It's the biggest sport in the country. A lot of you already know this story. And if you don't know it, you're going to be interested in it anyway. Because it has to do with maybe corruption, race, a whole bunch of stuff.

Is Brian Flores the Edward Snowden of the NFL? That's what we're trying to figure out. Because this kid is dropping dimes on everything. He's saying this is what they're doing, this is what they're doing, this is what they're doing, this is what they're doing. The first thing he's saying, first of all, he was fired. So he was fired after the Dolphins had a horrible season.

Yep. So we don't know if that's racist because he was hired. Yes. So he was fired. Is he just a disgruntled coach who got fired, who's just going, hey, fuck the NFL. They don't hire enough black people. Is he launching an offensive because he didn't do potentially a great job at the Miami Dolphins I mean you know

how do you get your players to focus in Miami you know how do you get what what you know how do you get them to focus in Miami can't it's hard

it's tough you're playing at the Hard Rock Cafe dog yeah it's tough I mean I'm surprised the Heat are doing so well right now they must have

some sort of strict curfew with the athletes in miami like they must all have like those ankle bracelets you get when you're on probation you know there's no way they're letting tyler hero not wear an ankle bracelet no no way jimmy butler i i can trust he seems like an adult but tyler hero tyler hero yeah put an ankle bracelet on that kid as soon as he leaves practice put a tracking device on that motherfucker if he goes anywhere near club live he gets scooped up by miami heat secret service and put back into his house so brian flores was the head coach of the Dolphins. They had a bad year. He gets fired. So after he gets fired, he starts saying, the owner of the Dolphins was paying me money

or trying to pay me money to throw games, which we've always all suspected was an unwritten rule of professional sports. Should you get penalized from that? It's almost like throwing at a baseball player who's hogging the inside corner. Not particularly legal to intentionally throw at a guy, but it's an unwritten rule that everyone understands. Like Roger Clemens used to say,

you get one side of the plate, you can't get two. So if you're taking both, I'm gonna back you up. And it's an unwritten rule everyone accepts. Now, in sports, it's probably an unwritten rule that if you're tanking as bad as they are, not on purpose, but your team just sucks, it behooves you in a business, obviously, to not play your hardest for the next couple games because you get a draft pick. I'm talking to the few women listeners we have, so I'm explaining the business to you.

The worse they are, the higher draft pick they get, which means they can make their team better for the future. Okay, imagine you had a Canal Street Gucci purse and someone said, listen, if you just leave that purse at home, we will give you a real Gucci purse. And someone said, listen, if you just leave that purse at home, we will give you a real Gucci purse next year. That's what you do. You leave it

at home. Okay? Even though you want to fucking flex, because there's some bitches at that party you hate, and they're not going to know the difference between fucking fake and real Gucci, and you want to wear that Gucci purse? If you leave it at home, we'll get you a new one next year. Okay, ladies? I'm explaining things to try

to help you with your smaller brains. I'm trying. So that's what they're essentially doing. That's probably an unwritten rule of sports. No, guys? Unwritten rule. Yep. That's why soccer has it right. The relegation, if you are last place,

you get bounced down out of the league. And how is that beneficial to the squad? You don't want to tank. You don't want to tank. So that's what it is. So it kind of is an incentive

for you not to tank because you don't want to get sent down. Yeah. But if you suck, you really suck. Right. And that's a good point.

They probably instituted that to counteract that unwritten rule that we all know is there, but that nobody talks about. Nobody talks about it, but we all kind of know it. Because if you were the general manager or the owner of a team, that's what you'd want. Yeah. You'd want, hey, look, this is a business. We can't keep losing.

We need a draft pick. So I don't want you to win the last. I don't want you to go on a winning streak. You know, we're 2-15. We don't need you to win the last two games. So he's saying, here's my question. We all probably know that this happens, that owners probably offer them a little bonus if they lose the games.

Is he only dropping dime on this because he was fired? That's my question. Or is Brian Flores Jesus? He's football Jesus. Is he Edward Snowden or is he a self-interested Machiavellian guy who's going, you know what? I got fired. I'm going to make sure I get rehired somewhere else by making a lot of noise, throwing a lot of words racism around, throwing a lot of corruption words around to make sure that they quiet me down by sending me to another organization. Yeah, but even if that was the case, it didn't work because he got hired by the Steelers as a linebacker coach. It was a hard demotion. He went from manager to stock boy. Right.

Real quick. Head coach. But he still got a coaching job. He still got a coaching job, but under another black coach. So it's comfortable. The weather changed a lot. But was that his move? Was the NFL involved in that, going like, let's make this look good because he's making

so much noise? You know, everyone's very sensitive to racism now. Yeah. So does the NFL go, let's move him to Pittsburgh with another black coach. So there's two black coach, make him happy. Hopefully he'll shut up. But apparently he's not shutting up. So that's evidence that that's not what he's doing.

I think it's real. I think it's real. It could be real because he's still going. And now he's saying that he was given this hush money and he didn't take it. Now, if it turns out that he did take it, if we find out he did take it, Brian, if we find out you did take it, you're not Jesus. It's going to be bad. You're not Jesus. But if he didn't take it, does anyone care?

Or is this something we just kind of know that teams do and he's kind of bringing something up and everyone's going like Brian come on dude you know no one's surprised

I mean and also going like Brian what would you do if you were the owner at least he's offering you money to throw the games

he's not just telling you to throw the games you know I just wonder if he would have said anything if he wasn't fired Jess do you think he would have said

anything if he wasn't fired and he, do you think he would have said anything if he wasn't fired and he would have just put himself on the chopping block? Probably not. Probably not. This is not going to help his case, though. The one thing the NFL does not like

are people talking. They do not like that. They are like the mafia. And that's why we're bringing this story up, not because we want to turn this into my podcast, Unleashed, but because the NFL is the most mafia gangster organization because they have so much power.

The Super Bowl is the highest rated viewership event. All the companies vie to get their multi-million dollar commercials on there. They traditionally fuck the players. They hid the CTE thing for a long time, just like the tobacco lobby did with the link that calls you a link between cancer. So this shows you when in capital, this is like a flaw in capitalism a little bit.

It's like when someone's making so much money or something is so powerful, you can keep things, you can pay people off to keep things under the rug, you can keep things, you can keep, pay people off to keep things under the rug and you can intimidate people from speaking out against injustices or corruption or abuse of power. Okay. Cause a lot of these guys, they're, they get like what, three years. What's the, what's the average lifespan? Three, four years. A lot of them aren't even guaranteed healthcare and shit like that. that i mean it's a pretty brutal reality and very recently you know it's come to light a little bit cte's obviously come to light a lot how they've been covering it up has come to light um you know racism in the in the nfl i won't so goes go so far as to say

what what's his name said is true? What's the kid who looks like Beaker with the afro? He's got the fun little Beaker face. Kaepernick? He looks like he's got that, like, kind of the disease where your face looks like that. Little B. Yeah.

I won't go so far as to say what Beaker said is true. When he said that he said the combine is like he said the combine is like a slavery block I don't agree with that these are professional athletes getting offered a chance to make

even the lowest income is going to be six figures and it's a sport they're checking for athletic prowess. You know, I get it. It does look a little similar, though. I get it how it looks a little similar. That's just because black people are so good at football.

The white guy's got to do the combine, too. Yeah, but do we have to do it ass naked, though? Good point. Do we have to have our balls just bulging as you take my hand size? That kind of has a Mandingo vibe. Yeah, yeah. What's going on here son can we can they wear clothes can you wear why is the shirts off yeah i can jump this high in

levi's too you know yeah that's got a little bit of a get out vibe yes it does it's got a little bit of a get out vibe i understand maybe that's where the conspiracy comes from is why are their shirts off why are their shirts off good point jared Jared. So maybe there's something sus, as the kids say with that. But other than that, the lowest salary you could make in the NFL, and just to put this in perspective, almost nobody will make this in their life.

Almost nobody on the planet will make $660,000 a year. That's the lowest income you make as an athlete um so obviously you know and i look that's that's beaker's brand i get it i get why beaker said it that's his brand that's beaker's brand right now beaker's not going to go any other way colin kaepernick's not going to say, you know, oh, the combine's great. He's going to figure out that's his brand, dog. He has a brand now. And I mean that. I really mean that. Okay?

He may be a great guy, but he has a brand. And why does he have a brand? Because Nike is paying him millions and millions of dollars to be that guy. So he's got to continue to be that guy. No matter how great things get, Colin Kaepernick will show up and say, wait a second. What about this? Can't break away from it.

So maybe he's got a point about the shirts. But I would have a lot more respect for Colin Kaepernick if he was talking about something like this. Because this actually, there's a reasonable person would say, hmm, this is interesting. Our league is what?

99% black and quarterback. So it's 99% black, 1% mostly quarterback, and Cooper Cup. Yeah. The sport is so black, even football is black. That's basically what it is. It's not even 1% white. It's Cooper Cup and three quarterbacks white. All right, we'll throw TJ Watt in there as well.

Yep. Right? We'll throw TJ Watt in there. And Travis Kelsey. Travis Kelsey. There's a few tight ends. He's a little black, but that's what Cleveland does to you. Yeah, I mean, the kid is definitely a flagrant two fan.

Yeah. For sure. Yep. For sure. But it's mostly black, but there's not a lot of black coaches. There's what? Two? There were two.

Two. Right? Lovie Smith just got hired in Texas. So that makes two now because now he's a linebacker coach in Pittsburgh, like you said. So it's still two. Yeah. But you have offensive coordinators, Eric Mianemi, Brian Lefkowitz, and the Buccaneers and stuff like that.

But not a lot of head coaches. No, not a lot of head coaches. Basketball used to be the same thinganeers and stuff like that. But not a lot of head coaches. No, not a lot of head coaches. Basketball used to be the same thing, where it was like, but now there's a lot of black coaches. How many black owners? How many black owners? Well, with that— Basketball's also changed in that regard. There's more black owners.

Michael Jordan's an owner. Magic was part owner. Jay-Z was owner of the Nets. It's changed a little bit. does usher have a piece of something or is he just owned justin bieber i think he owns the jeans for herpes that's it he does have herpes doesn't he one out of four or five people do yeah you know but with basketball the players have the agency to be owners and be coaches after the game you don't have that much to go to because of the brain trauma.

And also, your money's all... That's why you see all these former football players, they're driving an Uber now. Because they don't make as much money as basketball players. Or they're working at a car wash. It's not as viable as basketball. They can't guarantee contracts in football.

They can't guarantee contracts. People get hurt so easily. And they can't guarantee your mental state to be intact that you can have a life after that. So it's a little different with basketball. Right, right. Well, that kind of have a life after that. So like it's a little different with basketball, you know? Right, right. Well, that kind of makes it a little closer. I'm not going to say slavery because that's obviously not it, but it makes it a little

closer to a little bit sweatshoppy. It's a little sweatshoppy. Yeah. If you put it on a scale, now I know some people are going, whoa, whoa, Yanni, somebody's getting paid $660, but it's like, yeah, it's all relative. We're talking about professional sports and what the owners are making. The owners are making a bazillion dollars. Okay?

These $660, that's like asking Joe Rogan for $1,000. That's like asking Joe. Joe Rogan will hand me $1,000 like you will hand me a dime out of your jeans. Yeah. Very trendy, ripped jeans. Levi's. Levi's. Levi's. So when you put it on the relativity scale.

It is kind of sweatshoppy. It's a little sweatshoppy. Only the suicide nets are behind the goalpost. Right. Right. But that's the least player. That's the least. That's the least.

That's the bench warmers. But that's a lot of guys. A lot of guys. A lot of guys on special teams. A lot of guys. There's 50-something players. And they only make that money for two, three years tops. You know, running backs have a career span of, what, three, four years.

Yeah. Wide receivers, four, five years. And white quarterbacks, 49 years. Mm-hmm. Kickers, white kickers, 120 years. Yeah. White kickers last longer than most mortgages. Converted soccer players just have the longest lifespan.

When are black dudes going to wise up a little bit and start kicking through the fucking uprights? Don't know, son. Can't scuff up those cleats. That's the problem. Odell got diamonds in his cleats, son. You can't kick with that. That's what you call a Jared Harvin very good fucking joke.

The reason why you don't see more black field goal kickers is they don't want to scuff their cleats. That's what you call a great joke. That's a great joke. Right, I didn't think of that. That's what it is. So he's sounding the alarm. He's a whistleblower right now, if you will, for the NFL.

Nice. And the two points are really that, right? The hush money and the racism. Those are his two pillars of complaints, right? And what's the NFL's response to this right now? They're just not saying anything. I think they're saying, shut the fuck up. They're basically saying what Adam Silver said to the GM of the Houston Rockets,

which is shut the fuck up, guy. We gave you 50 cent hanging upside down in the Super Bowl. We're not racist. We're not racist. I mean, did you see Mary J. Blige? She was out there. It's an interesting thing. He has a point about the coaches.

I will say there's a point about the coaches. it's an interesting thing. He has a point about the coaches. I will say there's a point about the coaches. You can't tell me there's not a lot of great former players who could be head coaches who are black. Yeah. In a mostly black sport, you got to say,

that doesn't go to say that it matters what your race is based on how good you can coach. I mean, that little squeak over in the Rams, did he even play fucking football? He's a good coach. He did for a little bit, but then he was kind of like Rudy. He jumped around and then, you know.

You got those here and there. You got those here. You get those Jeff Van Gundy, never played, maybe played in, you know, private school league in high school, but is just such a nerd. You got those Theo Epsteins. Yeah, that their minds are something.

They're number crunchers. And in football, you need that a lot because it's like, it's simulated war and a lot of it is plays. And there's so much, there's this stereotype that football players are stupid, but the opposite is actually true. You have to be the smartest to play football.

There's so much to remember. There's so much to learn. There's so many options and second options and reads and patterns, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera. The playbooks are dense. Whereas in basketball, they just hand them a basketball and they go, you know, pick and roll. NBA's pick and roll, pick and roll.

Hop and shoot, triangle, pick and roll. As long as you've got a D in geometry, you can figure that shit out. And usually they run the plays through one or two guys. Everyone knows what their role is. You know, you're a shooter. You hang out around the three-point line. There's a lot of leeches. The NBA has become

a superstar league where it's like there's leeches. There's guys that just hang around the three-point line and get a kick if a superstar draws two. And that's it.

And then man-to-man defense. Zone is legal but nobody plays zone. Sports are a lot simpler in that way. Baseball and football, you can see why there's a lot of brainiacs in there. But there's a point to be made there.

This feels like sort of, this feels like the era when that started to be broached in basketball and then you started to see more black ownership and management in basketball. So you'll probably see more. And that's probably a good thing. It's obviously more representative.

Yeah. And regardless of it, we're the ones closest to the game. So we should have those positions of being the leaders of that. Absolutely. It's not like, oh, black, we don't get our credit. We're not around the game. No, we're in it. 99%.

Yeah. Providing the entertainment. We're providing the play. We should be there. As Chris Rock said, what did he say? 12% of the population, we're providing the play, you know, we should be there. As Chris Rock said, what did he say? 12% of the population, 99% of the NFL. NFL stands for F and large. And the first word, let me, I can't.

First word, we can't say on this podcast, but if we're on Joe Rogan's podcast, we can say it. I need all you guys to learn another language. We should all be doing it. It helps you just exercise your brain, and it's very practical when you travel to other countries or you want to converse with people. That's why Babbel is something you need to join and check out immediately.

They got 10 million subscribers. That's right. 10 million at Babbel. I love them because they give you these 15 minute little bite-sized lessons that make it a perfect way to learn language on the go. You're sitting on the toilet. You're on the train. You know, you're in a a plane you throw on the 15 minute lesson you learn a little bit bit by bit at a time that's the best way to learn a new language it makes it super easy so go ahead you've picked it up right you got babble jared's got babble what do you learn in spanish yeah because the kid's puerto rican he can't even speak and he's like me he's a greek who can't i can't speak greek um here's the thing about Babbel. Other languages, other language learning apps use AI for their lessons plans.

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in a second language eventually. Language for life, my friends. All right, so that's enough NFL. Whatever, we started with the NFL. You know, if you're listening to this and you don't like football, what can I tell you? Get with the program, all right? And if you're a to this and you don't like football, what can I tell you? Get with the program.

All right? And if you're a woman who doesn't watch football, your husband likes you a little less. It's just the truth. I love that my wife likes to watch

the Giants games with me. It makes it funner. Oh, yeah. You know? That's a Long Island thing, too. Get her into it. She's into it. It's the only sport

she gets excited for. She puts on her Giant jersey. You know, she looks cute in her Giant jersey. Calls the quarterback by the first name. Come on, Daniel. Yeah, she still doesn't know what's going on excited for she puts on her giant jersey you know she's executing her giant jersey calls the quarterback by the first name come on daniel yeah she still doesn't know what's going on but she likes watching it she still goes what anything is it and all that shit but you know like who's the pitcher but she's still there for it you know who scored sometimes

she'll root when the other team scores but you know i get it she's not you know it just doesn't speak to her focus on things that's not in the game like how much you think a hot dog sells yeah or you know a lot dog sells for in my life? Or you know a lot of questions. What's happening now? Like you asked me that same question two minutes ago. Then I discipline. But that gives me exercise too.

The disciplining keeps me in shape. And she's Italian so she gets it. She gets it. She knows. She was brought up to know the sauce has to taste a certain way. Garlic has to be sliced a certain way or you get disciplined. It's Italian culture.

I told her, I'm getting a guma because you're Sicilian. Okay? She's Sicilian. I bet your father would go, look, I get it. You understand. You guys got to have a guma. As long as it doesn't interfere with the family, I understand. Italians are hilarious, dude.

Guma is just a funny word. It's my guma. It's guma night. Is it your girlfriend night or is it your wife night? It's a guma. I'm with my guma. It's fucking broad.

I was with my guma and this fucking guy, he scratches the car. My wife wasn't supposed to know I was fucking out. It was a guma night. I can't have nothing happen to my fucking car because my wife doesn't know I'm fucking driving that night. I told her I was fucking playing poker.

It was stakes, cards, the whole deal with the guys. But I'm out with the fucking guma. She can't know I was on the highway. I was supposed to be one town over in Siasi. way. I was supposed to be one town over in Siassi. So, truck drivers have been in the news. I mean, the only thing I can say

is the truck driver protests at the border and the impending one coming up in D.C. has not been good for the economy, but it really, really, really has been good for the bonfire radio show. Yeah. I mean, truck drivers haven't been this famous

since Tracy Morgan. That's the last time we heard about truck... Yeah, I mean, look, right now, if I was serious, I would dump a little more money into the bonfire because these kids are in their trucks just sitting there all day protesting, and they love them some bonfire with Dan Soder and Jay Oakerson. Their fan base is 100% trucker because they're on SiriusXM. And that's who listens to SiriusXM is truckers, yeah.

I would always get a message when my special would play on. I'd just get a message, be like, hey man, I'm a Keebler driver. I love listening to your album in between Montana and North Dakota. You want to come out to a show?

Nah, man, I got, I'm working a 17 hour shift. I just took my 27th dose of no does i only got one day off and on that day i gotta sleep or i die so i can't come out to the show but man i really enjoyed listening to your thing for free i'm sure you got 13 cent royalty on it um so the truck drivers are really uh they're okay so, so here's the deal. They're protesting the mandates. Mandates are being lifted. That was the thing. They're being lifted, right? So now they're going to DC. The truckers are going to DC. The tough part about this is, now I think

the mandate should be over, all right? I'll step out of comedy for a second and say, lift the mandates. Okay. At this point, you've either been vaxxed or you've been infected or both, or you're a conspiracy theorist, or you have a good medical reason not to get the vax, whatever it is, you're either going to die or not die. You're either going to get sick or not sick. You're either at higher risk or lower risk. The thing's going to mutate. And it ain't going to mutate because of Montana. It's going to mutate because of large swaths of other continents that are much lower income, that are unvaccinated. And whose fault is that? It's pharma's greed's fault because they won't share the fucking vaccine with the third world, even though the governments of the world will probably give them the money to do that. Fucking big pharma doesn't want to release those patents because they're greedy.

True. That's the real greed. Everyone's always focused on the fucking shots. It's really the greed of that. That they don't want to give the vax away to those populations that are unvaccinated. Therefore, the virus goes there, replicates more, and creates new variants, which may be less. They may be less virulent.

They could be more. They could be less. Either way, people have some level of immunity at this point. It's also three years in. We also have proof that the mandates didn't really work that well. When you look at the numbers, New York, Florida,

very similar per capita. They didn't lock down. We did. Everyone's dead. Who was going to die? People die and people will die. People die of the flu, but this is worse. So people will die a little more than the flu at this point. But at this point, people can't continue to go crazy. They can't continue to live this way. We're going into the third year. It's got to end. So I sympathize with the truckers in that and that they're pent up and frustrated. I do sympathize.

But on the flip side, they're really fucking up the economy even worse. So like most people who are angry, because emotion clouds your judgment, they are making a statement, albeit I don't know how effective it is because Canada did what they did and they fucking wiped out everyone's bank account and

got rid of it. So it didn't really work but what did happen was millions and millions and millions and millions and millions and millions and millions and millions of dollars were fucking lost and it fucked the economy up even more. Truck drivers are the backbone of this country. Okay? Okay?

All right? I'm Jimmy Hoffa on this. Yeah, Jimmy Hoffa said, you know, it was for the truck drivers. He ended up in a fucking ditch somewhere. We don't know where he is. But he was played by Al Pacino and a geriatric Robert De Niro

who kicked some guy down the stairs. Tell him the Jimmy Hoffa story. But truck drivers do bring everything everywhere. You can't clog it up. It fucks the economy up. So, like I said, much like angry people, they're kind of throwing a fit, which is kind of understandable,

but they're also hurting. The reason why they're protesting is hurting the thing that they're protesting for. Correct. So that's the irony of it. So here they are again protesting. And my point is that Canada had a plan to lift the mandates in March anyway. The United States is lifting the mandates.

So what are we doing with this protest that's coming? Because the mandates are lifting. They're lifted in New York. They're lifted in Cali. They're lifted in Connecticut. they're lifted in connecticut they're obviously state by all the red states that have no mandates they never did um now we're just moving into that recommendations phase which is maybe what it should have been all along this is their 15 minutes of fame dog it's a recommendation phase like look we recommend you wear a condom okay if you don't you wear a condom.

Okay? If you don't, you got a chance to catch this, this, and this. But we also understand we can't mandate you to wear a condom because we know it feels good. Just like not wearing a mask. It just feels better. You want to be able to live raw daddy.

Yeah. You want to be able to just impregnate the world with your presence, with just a raw mouth and nose. Nobody wants to wear these face condoms anymore. I've had enough. Also, they cause a big environmental problem. Right, Jess? Are seals going to be swallowing these masks?

That's right. Baby turtles. Baby turtles, man. Where do you do it, all these masks? What do we do? I'm sorry. If you're from Long Island and you haven't been able to follow this, I might have been pronouncing it wrong for you.

Max. What do you do with the Max? Let's get rid of the Max mandates. I could have said mask mandate, and they're like, what's this fucking segment about here? Okay, sorry. Max. I'm talking about the Max.

We can get rid of Mex mandates. Two things I don't fucks with. Rattlesnakes and condoms. That's from the great Vice Rocks. Very funny. So, I don't know.

What do the truckers want? What do the truckers want, Jess? Reading about it now. Besides free SiriusXM. Lifetime subscription. Besides a lifetime subscription from SiriusXM and a signed fingerless glove from Jay Oakerson. And maybe a signed, tightly laced Air Force One from Dan Soder.

Or a signed Pearl Jam open button down from Dan Soder with a dirty Gap t-shirt underneath. What do they want? What's their list of demands? I don't know. This article is long-winded. Kamal Panu is a Sikh immigrant truck driver from Montreal. list of demands. I don't know. This article is long-winded. Kamal Pannu is a Sikh immigrant truck driver from Montreal.

He doesn't believe in vaccinations. He believes in natural immunity. All right. So he's in the conspiracy theorist or whatever. But I think Canada was a lot stricter than we were. They were a lot stricter. I think they were. So they're a little more fed up. They were feeling it.

Yeah. He had joined the convoy because the COVID restrictions in the surrounding province of Quebec have become too much to bear. He said that he and his wife used to do their gross free shopping at Costco until the government decreed that the un-vaxxed would be barred from big box stores. Since then, their monthly grocery bills jumped to 200. Yeah. So it's like the guy doesn't believe in the fucking vax.

This is the democracy i mean you do all you can do to convince people to get vaxed yeah um and you move on it's hard you don't expect the guy who wears sleeveless flannels to have that much of an opinion on science also it's just funny how these protests isn't it funny how the human human condition is and how humanity is if you notice a lot of these protests come much later you know i guess that's that's just the irony of it it's like when people should protest is not enough to make them protest because the reason they protest is because this has been happening for so long. And then by the time they protest,

it's been happening for so long that change is already happening anyway. You see that all the time. It's their way to retaliate. You told me what to do, so I'm gonna tell you what to do now and inconvenience you. Yeah.

It's like when you see a gay rights march that you're going like, guys, you got it. You won. This guy was getting locked out of Costco, though. Getting locked out of Costco for a Canadian is tough. He's like, where am I going to get my maple syrup? Hey, I need a box.

I need a box of maple syrup nah I pay for that membership don't lock me out of Costco dog you're giving me my money back yeah dog I mean it is there's something to be said just about bulk toilet paper

that's just a nice thing yeah you don't gotta continue to run to the store you know and the free samples too you know all these guys got freezers in their garage.

They like bulk shopping. Filled with elk meat and shit like that. They like to get their burgers in bulk. Look at these Canadians. So the Canadians are rising up. And Justin Trudeau, who kind of looks like a French cartoon of a handsome guy. Doesn't he look like a cartoon? Doesn't he look like you wouldn't even have to animate him

to put him in Frozen? No. He looks like a character in Frozen. Yeah. Why do I know Frozen? Good question. I have a daughter. If I didn't have a daughter

and I knew Frozen, call the FBI. Yep. Because you're going, why does this adult without a kid know about Frozen? Who's he trying to connect with? Justin Trudeau.

He looks like a French cartoon of a handsome guy. Or Fidel Castro's love child. Yeah, he does look like Fidel Castro. He looks like him a little bit, he does. This is the rumor floating around. That he's, yeah, I mean, Obama, and also Obama's, you know, Muslim.

Lizard. Yeah, I mean, you got to give it to these guys. Their imaginations are great. Here's another one. Yeah. I mean, not really. I mean, they both kind of just look like Liam Neeson. Yeah, they look alike in the way

we all look alike to Chinese people. It's like those are two white, whitish looking guys. Okay, when you see those pictures, that's just the way black people see the world. Yeah.

They're just going, oh, those are two white guys. The only way we could tell them apart is because one has a hat on. I mean, dog, if me and Nate Bargatze

walked into a fucking reggae club, do you think they're really going to know which one's Yan and which one's Nate? Yeah, it looks the same. Yeah. This looks like an advertisement for Supercuts. Yeah. I mean, they don't know.

Looks like a before and after. I mean, they don't really look alike. They just have noses, eyes, and they're both whitish. I mean, it does look like two totally different dudes but i got to admit i i'm saying that from a white eye from my perspective where i can tell the difference between the fucking whites i bet you the chinese are having a tough time with this oh man so he broke it up, right? And he's, as of today, he's unfreezing.

He's erasing the emergency prowlers, which everyone was worried about. He did go like a day too long, right? Yeah, that shit's a little scary. It's a little scary when a government can do that. Freezing your bank accounts. Yeah, freezing your bank accounts is scary shit. But then going to your bank accounts and freezing it,

that didn't seem necessary. Why don't you just break up the protest? Why did they go into bank accounts? That's sus. Plant them a little something. That is sus. Why would you go to a bank account, dog? And what's the reasoning

why they went into the bank accounts from the Canadian government's perspective? Because the people were funding it and they wanted to stop the funding. What were they funding? Hot dogs for them to eat? What was so important about the funding? What funding were they getting

that needed to be interrupted? I think there was a GoFundMe donation and that people from America and Canada gave to the truckers, but GoFundMe didn't give it to the people, so they were thinking about giving it to another cause, but they said, no, it's messed up, so we'll give it back to the people was like yeah yeah let's just let me

keep this for you guys and i'll invest it in bitcoin for you yeah well that was the other crazy shit that the gofundme was gonna redirect what people yeah to other causes like they could have just they don't donate to like american red cross or something like that they would not give it to the truckers that's right they were gonna decide what charity to give it to. Yeah. And then the government has taken it now? Or what are they doing with it? No, Gold Fund me gave it back. But they were like, okay, which cause should we give it to? So they were weighing out different causes because they didn't agree with the truckers.

Oh, so that's not cool. Yeah, the money was going to go to the truckers. They said, we didn't agree with that. We'll give it to another cause. Why don't they give it back to the people? That's what they ultimately did. But they took a little bit to decide. So the people got it back.

Yeah, they got it back. Eventually. Eventually. But they were thinking about we're going to give it to our own pocket and the Red Cross. Yeah. And everyone says they're giving it to the Red Cross. That means 70% of it is going into my pocket and 30% is going to the Red Cross. Believe me, I've done a few fundraisers myself.

Okay. Where I say, Yannianni how much did you donate i say i gave five thousand dollars thank you guys for showing and another five went my bottom because you're still a good person yeah you still gave five i could have given 10 but then i wouldn't have had five for my pocket yeah i mean i put the show on. I performed. I paid myself.

Yeah, you still did a good job. I mean, those kids in Africa get hot to Pop-Tart now, but you know, it's not a full one. They get a little something, unfrosted,

you know? Yeah. Yeah, the point is, everyone's socially conscious, but they're also self-interested. We're all a little both.

The best of us are both. Nobody is purely socially conscious. We're engineered to be self-interested. And that's ironically what makes globalism a great bulwark against world war, is that we're, I know everyone always complains about globalism and shipping jobs overseas, and I get all those complaints. It did hurt a lot of cities, obviously it does. But in the geopolitical sphere, it does intertwine all of us in a way. And by all of us, I mean countries, even countries with different economic systems

and political philosophies, it does intertwine us. It does make us interdependent and symbiotic, meaning that we're less likely to go to hot war, especially the powers, because we need each other so much. You know, just as an example, Russia gets its turkeys from us. We get our gas from that. Whatever you want to say, it's, you know, not every country is self-sufficient in resources. So trade is very important. That's always been the case to some extent. But between powers,

now because everyone's built up, there's a detente when it comes to that as far as a hot war, you know? Because you can't, you can't just go to war. China can't go to war. You have a better chance of New York State going to war with Texas than you will ever have of China and the United States going into a direct conflict. It's not gonna happen.

They know it, We know it. And thank God for that. And capitalism is partly responsible for that because we're intertwined with them. They lose a lot of money. We lose a lot of money. It fucks. Their people starve.

Our people starve. Everyone loses. Their elite class loses. We lose. And thank God people are self-interested enough to know that because that's only really, they're not, they don't know it because they're great people.

Great people always fuck shit up because they don't live on the planet. They live in an ideal realm based on ideas that don't exist. They're dealing with a species that doesn't exist. Going, humans gotta be good. Humans will never be good.

Show me one life form that's good. When did you ever see one ant help another ant because it felt bad because it was sad? No. The weak ant gets trampled and pushed into the fucking water. Show me one pack of wolves that was nice

to the beta. Said, you know what? We feel bad. Let's help you out. We're gonna help you. We're gonna, no, it's like you can't cut it. You're banished. Best you can hope for is you hang around

these fucking bipedal monkeys and they throw you a scrap of meat. That's what happened to the weak wolves. They had to fucking team up with us. Worked for them,

which shows you sometimes the weak in one environment is the strong in the other. That's Darwinism, by the way. People always misconstrue Darwinism because the expression is to strong survive. That is not true. That is not true. That's not what Darwinism is. Darwinism is those that adapt to change the best survive. So it's very conceivable the weakest of the species in one environment, after some change in the environment happens, may become the strongest because their weak attributes in the

previous environment are more suited in the new environment, right? Just like you see happening with comedy, okay? There's a lot of comedians who aren't great standups from the previous environment who are just, you know, found a way to do a true crime podcast or whatever. And that's popular. And now they're making millions. It doesn't have to be true crime. It could just be a podcast. It's a new environment. They're better at podcasts is what I'm saying. Whatever you say it's not

I'm actually admiring because now now they're millionaires whereas these stand-ups are sitting around going like when is SD gonna give me my spots? I need to be able to make my 75 bucks tonight. And you know what?

A lot of those comics don't even know how rich some of these people, when you tell them they don't believe, they're going, what? It's like, no, yeah, they're multimillionaires. And they go, what? How's that possible? I don't see them. I'm not a seller. They're multimillionaires.

And they go, what? How's that possible? I don't see them at the cellar. It's like, yeah, that's exactly why they're multimillionaires. Because you don't see them. You don't see them sitting around in a restaurant. Ordering extra pita for hummus. Getting half off a burger.

Someone just called me Yanni Backpedal and Pappas. No, it was just an example. Whatever conclusions you draw in your head from that example is your business. Okay? It's your business. It truly is. It was just an example

because it's such a popular genre. It's a popular genre. So the point being is if you do true crime, I mean, I watch true crime every night the point being is if you do true crime, I mean I watch true crime every night. Okay? So if you do true crime, you got a shot. Right? Just like if you do a sex tape, you got a shot.

Right? Just like if you're Indian and you're a comic, you got a shot. There's a billion of them. Let's be honest. If you're Asian, you got a shot. Doesn't mean you're not a good comic. I'm just saying this to real world. People always walk around. Oh, this guy worked hard. Oh, this guy. It's not, we all know it's not all that. It's not all talent. The world is not, even in basketball or sports, it's not always that. We've talked about that. You telling me there's not another black guy who could have hit an occasional three like Mike Dunleavy?

Are we serious? Are we serious we saw Mike Dunleavy in the league for fucking 12 years? You couldn't find one other black guy? You could find a guy from Division II or III to stand around the fucking three-point line and hit an open shot once in a while. Not even that great. Why was Mike Dunleavy in the league? His once in a while. Not even that great. Why was Mike Dung leaving the league? Father was a coach. Father was a great player, coach.

He's white! Most of the fans are white. The country's white. Gotta have a few white guys out there. It's called business. Nothing's pure. Sports probably the most pure thing.

I hate when I find out stories about it's impurities because you want to hope there's something pure. Sports is the closest to pure. It's a meritocracy. People need to win. In order to have a win, you gotta have the best players out there. That's why sports probably was one of the first things to break color barriers and stuff

because people wanted to win. There's only so long you can have Bob Cousy out there running the weave. Yep. There's only so long you can have Sandy Koufax out there relying on a tricky 64-mile-an-hour curveball to get guys out before you say, just give me Bob Gibson who throws 300 miles an hour. Yeah. There's only so long if you want to win. So that's the great thing

about winning. That's the thing that capitalism promotes is winning. And the great thing about winning is it's pure. It's nature. In sports. Winning is the purest thing. Well, not in politics. Not in politics.

You got to get dirty to win. But that's the nature of that game. So it is kind of pure. Because nobody goes into politics going like, you know, we're going to have, you know. People get into politics and go like, okay, I'm well aware I'm going to have to hide some bodies. We're going to have to bomb some people.

But I want this because I'm a psychopath. Okay. My last name is Aradam. My dad killed a lot of refugees in this country. And we keep it quiet. He owns a diamond mine. It's owned under subsidiary. This is whoadam. My dad killed a lot of refugees in this country, and we keep it quiet. He owns a diamond mine. It's owned under subsidiary. This is who I am, okay? I drink wine.

I eat clams. I hang out in Connecticut, and I pretend to root for the Yankees. I'll do whatever I need to do because that's how we're wired. I'm Aradam, okay? I'm Aradam. I'm a bush.

I'm a, you know, whatever. So that's the name of that game. But sports is the most like nature. It's civilized war in that it's about conquering territory. It sort of simulates what propels evolution, which is the strongest wins and moves forward. So there's a purity in that. There's a cynical purity in that.

Sometimes I got to just stop and go, comedy, comedy, hit comedy. Needs to be a joke. You're going on too long. True crimes, dude. Yeah. Well, that just came out, okay? That just came out.

Sorry. Now, Yankee fans are peak fart-smelling fans out here, says Heath Coles. Obviously a Boston fan saying that. That's what makes sports fun. Like, we hate each other because of the teams we rooted for as a kid. That's fun. Hey, man, why is there allowed to be porn on Twitter and terrorists but not our last president?

Kid's got a good point. We could use him, too. He was entertaining. Now that the power's gone, give him his Twitter back. He's got a new app. He's got a new app that's bombing. What's it called?

He didn't slap his name on that? Truthy or something like that? He should have called it Trump through truth. Yeah, so Trump does have a new app that he's trying to compete with Twitter that he launched, but it's not doing good. It's not doing good.

It's called truth. It's called truth. And we're looking at CNN politics, so I don't know if we're going to get the truth about truth. Is this Brian Stelter? What's that bald guy's name? Oh, yeah. That guy's great.

Yeah. Anyway, this is what's going on. Somebody did it. The process of signing up seemed simple. They just asked you for a Hail Hitler. This is going to be CNN's coverage. The process seemed simple. They just asked you for a Hail Hitler code

and wanted to know your record of white supremacy and then they signed you up. That would be CNN's coverage of Trump's. And then this would be the right-wing coverage. You can say what you want to say. It's the only freedom I've ever known. Sign up to Trump's bathroom wall,

where you can write anything you want. Feel free to say the N-word whenever you want on Trump's train. You gotta be able to say the N-word to be free.

Follow the truth. Yeah. A big tent? Follow the truth. Yeah, it's not doing good from what I understand. Yeah, this is a social media app,

not Moontower, dog. In his defense, you know, he doesn't have a, he Moon Tower, dog. In his defense, he's trying to get into the tech game at 80. So it's not really an old man's game. It's more of a young man's game. A young, brilliant guy who drops out of college to become a billionaire because girls didn't like him and he smelled his fingers. And he wants to overcompensate. I mean, let's be honest.

What really motivates Jeff Bezos, Elon Musk, who if you saw him before he got his LeBron James new hairline, nerd. Who's another one? The Microsoft guy. What motivates Bill Gates? What is it? How many wedgies do you think it takes to push a guy to start his own company, drop out of Yale,

to become the richest person in the world, and keep going, keep being motivated? What keeps that motivation going when he gets to 30 million for him to get to 300, and from 300 to get to 3 billion. It's wedgies. The only thing is wedgies. He wasn't born

with that type of intrinsic ambition. That had to be beaten into him because he's a weaker, weaker physical man with an egghead who can understand paladrimes or whatever those poems are called. And he got beaten into ambition.

That's what they are. And then they become Batman villains. You know, Jeff Bezos now looks like, I mean, he looks like a bat. He looks like one eye, the Batman villain. Yeah. He swole. Yeah, he's swollen. Yeah, like he puts on a cat suit at night and causes havoc. And Elon Musk just turned himself into a handsome guy.

Can we take a peek at Elon Musk before he was not only the CEO, but he was also a client? Yeah. Yeah, there we go. Look at, I mean, how many walls do you think that guy was hit up by? Good God. How many times do you think he watched Revenge of the Nerds and got chills and cried the movie?

Jesus Christ. Dude, look at Bezos now, though. Yeah, look at Bezos. Dude, look at that. Dude, Bezos has the body of Conor McGregor. This motherfucker look like he's been delivering packages himself. It is nuts. Look up Elon Musk pre-hair plugs.

Jesse likes this. Jesse loves, you love the insecurity of people, right? Is it funny to you? Oh, wow. I've never seen this. Look at that hairline. Holy shit. There you go. He went from make-a make a wish kid to make a wish ceo yeah he looks like machine gun kelly in uh 2009 oh also hair plugs yeah there you go the bruce willis damn yeah now look at him yep he's got a full head Yeah Money doesn't make you happy

But it certainly does help He looks great with his new figure Yeah look at this guy Yeah But they're good guys Elon Musk is a good guy You know They all want to save humanity

They're all thinking about us You know They don't want to beat us into submission and become the bullies that they hated. That's not what they're in this for. Humans are pretty complicated, but at the end of the day, we're very simple, right? You could break down people into insecure and secure categories.

People who understand their issues, people who look inward to figure out who they are and why, and people who don't. People who are conscious and people who understand their issues, people who look inward to figure out who they are and why, and people who don't. People who are conscious and people who are unconscious. It's basically what it is. Now, these people, obviously what motivates, you can't be too conscious when you're ambitious. Ambitious people are not too conscious

because they're motivated, but they're running from something. But once they get it, a lot of times these people do become conscious because they achieve their goal and there's nowhere to go from something. But once they get it, a lot of times these people do become conscious because they achieve their goal and there's nowhere to go and they have to strive for a higher understanding plane or a higher meaning in life because they're not fulfilled. And so these people aren't always bad. A lot of them end up becoming good. But anyone who's super ambitious ain't a great person.

I've never met like a super ambitious great person. Tunnel vision, though. Yeah, they got tunnel vision. They're super self-absorbed. And that's what you kind of need to get to the top. That's not a bad thing.

It's just a thing. Who would win in a Royal Rumble between Gates, Bezos, Trump, and Elon? Obviously, Bezos. Bezos. Have you taken a look at any of the guys' builds recently? Looks like an MMA fight. Yeah.

Dude, he looks like Conor McGregor. I thought that was Conor McGregor walking down the street. Everybody needs to invest, man. You got to let your money make money. I understand how that can be daunting. You got to call a guy. You got to get recommended a guy. Not anymore. Not anymore.

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where he's trying to implant this device in people's heads. And then they can automatically download whatever and communicate with each other telepathically. And also he thinks it will cure Alzheimer's and all these things in the future and stimulate all these neurons or whatever These neuroscientists understand And they were testing it on monkeys like everyone does And um some monkeys died

They don't say how the monkeys dies But I assume they freaked out once they started thinking in english They were probably going what the fuck was that? They kept trying to go, ooh, ah, ah, but all they heard was, hello, how are you? And they just freaked out because they're like, I'm hearing voices in my head, and they probably just all slammed themselves into the glass that they were fucking jailed in.

But for hospital records, it was COVID-related. For hospital records, they died of COVID. They added them to the COVID count. Yeah. I mean, dude, that's got to be a trippy feeling to be a monkey. And then all of a sudden they put something in your head. And all of a sudden, like you hear the, you hear like, you hear a ping. You have a message from, what the fuck?

You're just thinking about a banana and then Bananas by Gwen Stefani starts playing. Yeah. I would not be surprised if these 15 monkeys either died from suicide or they actually were forced to watch Bruce Willis' movie Nine Monkeys. That was a bad joke, but kind of there.

It was there for the taking. No, it was good. It was a bad movie. What was it called, Twelve Monkeys? Yeah, or you could just say James Franco's performance in Planet of the Apes. Yeah, James Franco's Planet of the Apes, or really in anything.

Let's be honest, dude. I mean, you know, James Franco's James Franco, you know? He let the guy fuck his students. He's never going to win an Oscar. He's never going to be in a movie with Daniel Day-Lewis where he gets it and just steps it up. It's not going to happen. If you cut your arm off and they still didn't give you the Oscar,

give it up. He's comedic in a way. They test everything on monkeys right? I think so It's a big part of products Yeah So but he's catching some slack obviously Because they're always trying to go after Elon Musk for anything

So they're calling him Calling him out for animal cruelty And he denies animal cruelty This would be funny if this happened to Be, and he denies animal cruelty. This would be funny if this happened to Bezos, and he denies animal cruelty, but affirms human cruelty. He's like, look, we didn't do anything to the monkeys, but yeah, we really pay our Amazon guys like shit.

We do do human cruelty. I will admit that, but no monkeys were harmed. we do do human cruelty. I will admit that, but no monkeys were harmed. I wonder, do they get healthcare? Does Amazon guys get healthcare?

I think they pay pretty well now. You can just blink. Just blink. You don't have to say anything. I don't want you to lose your job. Just blink. You get healthcare? Yeah. Yeah.

But didn't a roof fall on some employees recently or something and Bezos was like, what can you do? I'm sorry, I'm in St. Martin with my peace working out twice a day eating raw liver.

He doesn't invest in like AC in the warehouses but he keeps like an ambulance on standby just in case if someone falls out. Oh my God. I believe it too.

I believe it, these greedy fucking pigs. Yeah, that's why unions ended up happening. These guys get greed. All they see is the bottom line. It's the same thing

that happens to dictators. It just becomes numbers. Everything becomes numbers, the bottom line. It's the same thing that happens to dictators. It just becomes numbers. Everything becomes numbers, numbers, numbers. That's why Cake Boss was such a brilliant show. I would love to. They should force Jeff Bezos to have to deliver some fucking packages. Right? Yeah.

Love to see Jeff Bezos show up on your ring camera. Right? His one eye's looking at the next door. He just accidentally puts it on the wrong house because he saw the wrong address. The way he look, I'm going to start squatting the package and shit. Yeah. It looks good. That'd be nice.

You think he could do a day in Long Island delivering packages, Bezos? Probably, yeah. Yeah. I like that you admitted that it's not that difficult work. What? You pick the box up, you put it on the phone store. No, it is difficult. You can't break shit.

You can't break shit. You know? Going up these long driveways in Syosset and Hoppog and shit like that. Yeah. And I'm black, so I got to worry about... Right. I can't be running up on the yard because they think... You better have that Amazon uniform everywhere.

I have to have it everywhere. I make sure I'm pronounced. People know I'm there. I make white people feel comfortable. Right. I walk up on the yard like, have y'all seen this new Etsy store? And then they turn around and they feel comfortable do you just go up the driveway

whistling James Taylor yes that's always a good one black people if you're listening if you whistle James Taylor you got a better shot when I pull up that van is bumping Frank Sinatra yes in Long Island that's a good idea

they go whoa whoa oh okay I'm sorry they show up with whoa. Oh, okay. I'm sorry. They show up with a gun. Oh, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I saw you on my ring camera, but I didn't know. You're more of a Sammy Davis black. Yeah.

Okay, my fault. My fault. I'm sorry. Sammy Davis, he's very talented. Very talented. I just want to make sure I'm kissing that King Cole here. Remember that line from Goodfellas? He's very talented.

Leave it at that. It's very different. Leave it at that. The guy's talented. I just want to make sure I'm not kissing that King Cole over here. You get that white music, dog. You get a different type of accommodation. You pull up with a white music.

It's like, hey, can I get you a water? Soda? Pull up playing Young Thug. You're like, stay away from my daughter. Exactly. No, you might get shot at. Yeah. You should just have Taylor swift blaring in the

truck yeah well she likes the gays so they might not like write that either right james taylor's you can't go wrong with james can't go wrong or journey if you got journey bumping or is the great patrice o'neill one of the funniest fucking things he said it on onaNA. He said, there's something in that guitar in the radio head song Creep that encapsulates white guys. Like that guitar just gets, like it hits, it just awakens the white. When that guitar hits in Creep. But I'm a creep. Yeah. I'm a weirdo.

Go watch that clip if you, it's so funny. Patrice O'Neio talking about Creep. And that bit, basically, Chappelle ended up doing something similar on his show with John Mayer. Remember John Mayer starts playing the guitar? Oh, yeah. Everyone at the restaurant just starts dancing.

And then the blacks, the drums, and people in the barbershop just start dancing to the drums. So that's how brilliant Patrice is. How funny is that, dude? He's like, I study white people. He's like, whiteness, that guitar does something to you white people? It's like that.

You ever been in a bar when journeys don't stop believing in a white bar? Well, one of the greatest jokes, shout out Joey Gay. I just had his like 15th heart attack. Just stop doing coke. Great guy. Joey Gay is one of the greatest guys in the business I've met. But he had a great joke about, he used to go, what's that song?

Sweet Caroline? Sweet. You remember the joke? You probably heard it. He would just out of nowhere go, Sweet Caroline. And every time the audience would go, da, da, da. And he'd go, that's how you find white people lost in the woods. That's true.

Great joke. Great joke. When Journey, Sweet Caroline, or Piano Man Comes on in the bar I know it's time to go home Yeah I'm getting out of here dog No you're good I think you're good

I think you The time for you to go home Is you start hearing like Megadeth No but even then White people just want to touch you When those songs come on They want to touch you

And sing along It's like You know I don't know Those motherfucking lyrics dog Get away from me Yeah But you like all types of music I like all types of music

But don't put your music on me. Right, right, right, right. You know? Sweet Caroline. That song is horrible. I don't think nobody sees it. That's how you find white people lost in the woods.

Every time he did it, the audience would go bum, bum, bum. Every time. He wouldn't prompt them. He wouldn't tell them to do it. They would just finish it every single time.

He had that other good joke about finding pictures oh yeah uh palestinians throwing rocks he was like the first one then then you saw a lot of people have that joke but what was it again how come they're not yeah how come we're not sending more scouts to power. Yeah. All right. So let's talk about this. I'm doing this show with Bedhead. I don't care. We'll talk about the Fresh Prince and we'll talk about Florida. The Floridas don't say gay at.

But the Fresh Prince, they're. But the Fresh Prince, they're redoing the Fresh Prince. I mean, this is how out of ideas they are. When are they just going to hire one of these QAnon kids to sit down? Their imaginations are so lit. If I was a studio executive,

I would just sit one of them down and go, just tell me everything that's on your mind. That's a fact. And just have your pad ready and they're like, okay, AOC's a shapeshifter. Obama's an alien from another planet. He was born in Saudi Arabia. He's a Muslim spy. And you're just fucking

going, I'm listening. We get The Rock, Jason Statham. I mean, they're just remaking everything else. Now they're making The Fresh Prince as a drama. Some things are not meant to be a drama. Now, if they would have made The Fresh Prince into a horror movie, I would watch that. Because horror movies are comedies, really.

That would be hilarious. But that would be funny to watch. Like, Carlton's the killer. Like, you try to, like, Carlton's just starts killing everyone. But, dude, what are we going to do next? You're making it a drama? What are they going to make Seinfeld into a drama? Hey, the reason why people

like Seinfeld, I hate to tell you studio executives, you fucking morons, is because it wasn't a drama. The reason why people like Fresh Prince of Bel-Air is because it wasn't a fucking drama. Yeah. But Fresh Prince is kind of a horror movie. You know how scary rich black people are to white people?

Yeah. True. True. Did you watch it? No, not yet. Is it on? Because Aunt Baby is dark-skinned again, so I will watch it for that reason.

Someone said, make Seinfeld a porno. I bet you there is one. I bet you there is one. I bet you there's some deep fakes. Why don't we look for an Elaine deep fake? They squeeze the living shit out of every product they produce.

That is true. Sebastian Robinson just goes, ah, Giannis the Libby. Denton Vision, shout out, says, looked at my kingdom. I was finally there to sit on my throne at the prince of who cares. Very funny. Very funny. They got to remix everything, man.

You know, they're running out of ideas, but, you know, they try to infuse that woke thing into it it too you know oh so they they can do gilligan's island but he's stuck on the island of misogyny you know like he can do right you know or gilligan's island it's just epstein's island yeah exactly that would be a great instead a sequel to gilligan's island called epstein's island where they're all shipwrecked with kids and then the kids kind of get wind of what's going on and they escape. And then it turns into like a Lord of the Flies kind of, you know, and then the kids have to, the kids are running around.

They're being hunted by pedophiles. But then the kids meet like a native tribe there that eats one of the kids because that's what they do. But then the other kid gets to explain to them that there's a better meal. If you team up with us, there's bigger humans we can work together to kill. And then they convince the tribe

to kill the pedophiles and then they all eat the pedophiles. Great movie. Yeah, I don't like how fast you came up with that whole plot. I'm sure if it doesn't make a great movie. It was a little eerily weird how you came up with that whole plot

in a matter of three nanoseconds. But good job. There's some QAnon kids. We probably have a few. Everyone's got a few QAnon fans. Someone's listening to this right now in their car going like, that doesn't sound like a movie. That sounds like real life to me.

That's what they're doing. Producer of New Fresh Prince is as greasy as Joe DeRosa's hair. Will Smith is producing it. Oh, Will Smith. Someone says, oh, wait, that's RuPaul's Drag Race. Oh, man. Yanni, what obscure porn

should I be getting into this week? The world's your oyster, my friend. Take a peruse. Did we find any Seinfeld deep fake or no? There's actually a Seinfeld deep fake or no there's actually a

Seinfeld triple X parody starring Sasha Gray Ashlyn Brooke Sasha Gray she's Greek too I mean her dad I swear to God bro

we asked Jesse to look up everything on the internet motherfucker take eight years to do it as soon as you look up porn

this motherfucker is goddamn point deck to just real quick with this shit he's the two finger assassin the carpal tunnel typer that's just real quick but this shit he's the two-finger assassin pouring for the carpal tunnel typer that's what i like to call him you know what's

funny is um sasha gray is greek and um everyone knows that except for one person everyone will admit that she's greek except for one person her dad her father everyone knows who sasha gray is except one person her dad you go to her dad and you say who's sasha gray and he will go nobody to me nobody can't do that in a greek family i'm sure she had a you know but that's what happens the greek fathers come down so hard on the daughters, they don't let them date anyone. You know Maria Menounos is, she's been with her husband who's Italian. They've been together since they were 17 or 16 from high school.

She went to Emerson or some, some good college or whatever. When she was in college, she finally admitted to her parents that she was dating him and her dad disowned her. So the years in which she was like trying to make it in Hollywood,

she was like broke, sleeping on a mattress and her dad just disowned her. Later on, he came around and now he's nice to the guy. But you know, if I was a guy, I'd always hold a grudge.

You know, like when Maria Menounos left the room, I would probably just say, hey Gus, fuck you. I just want to let you know. Oh, I'm sorry. I'm from Greece. We have a problem with this. Italians,

these are mafia people. They eat monkeys. We hate them. And he just goes, hey, Gus, fuck you. You know? That was a tough thing you did to me and your daughter.

He's even more messed up because he comes back into the life of money, you know? Yeah. Looking for an investment in that diner. They're all okay now,

I think, but that's what happened, dude. That's how hardcore Greeks are. Look at this name, Sasha Gray's real name. Sasha's real name is Marina Ann Hansis. She's Greek. I know the story because all Greeks are aware of other Greeks. I mean, eventually we find each

other. I spoke to Dimitri Martin three days ago on FaceTime. We we find each other. I spoke to Dimitri Martin three days ago on FaceTime. We will find each other. You know, it's just the Greek way. There's not a lot of us. We're like the Spartan 400. And when we sense that there's trouble in the world, we band together like the 400. We're ready for the apocalypse. Yeah, Sasha Gray. So what's her story with her father? Does they say anything? Maybe you could Google an article like Sasha Gray and her father, their relationship. And while we do, we'll finish up on this gay story while Jesse finds the fucking father thing. Oh, did we mention the Utah McDonald's? Yeah, I made a joke about it, right?

That's really funny. So what happened? The guy. So he got into a little altercation at the drive-thru because they got his order wrong you know he gets an altercation they're fighting they're pulling cops come up to arrest him apparently he had a gun in his car the boy his four-year-old kid in the back takes the gun fires at the cops as they're arresting him the four-year-old kid started fucking blasting cops did he hit did he kill any of the cops i don't think so i think think he just fired. Yeah.

I mean, because one shot, four-year-old, that's going to throw, that kickback's going to throw that kid all over the backseat. Looked like he's wrestling with a ghost as he's firing that.

So that's a fun story. So the pops just got upset because they didn't, they got his order wrong at a fast food restaurant. Yeah, they probably didn't give him enough barbecue sauce. Yeah.

I mean, it is kind of infuriating if you ask for a Big Mac and they throw you a cheeseburger. It's like, dude, this is not Russia, dog. What's me up on these sauces? When you go to a fast food restaurant, you're going because you're in the mood for something specific. And then probably it was a long line in the drive-thru. And then for him to get it corrected, he probably had to go all the way around. I can tell you how it happened.

It's long, too, in Utah because the people have to take their orders and they have to take all their wives' orders. Right. And also the orders are very long because these are fat, huge circles ordering what nine people could eat. Yeah. So a line in Utah probably takes four times as long as a line in New York. Yep.

Because those people just are fat. Mm-hmm. You know? And so he probably saw six cars and he's going like, this is going to take three hours because the next car is going to be like, okay, let me get 12 cheeseburgers, 14, you know, quarter pounders, 16 fries.

Wait a second. Let me call my wife. She can't make it because she can't get out of her room. So I have to order for her unless you know a construction company that can remove the whole wall.

Unless someone can take the roof off and you can put me on a show. What's it called? My 900 pound life. I'm gonna have to order. I'm also picking up

for my whale of a wife. So this order is gonna take forever. So he knew that. So he got upset because he's been jonesing for this fucking happy meal for his kid

and a quarter pounder for him all day. So he drives past it after he gets his order. He looks in the back. He's like, fuck. He looks back. One of these circles is already ordering. He sees he's going to have to go to the back of the line. So what does he try to do?

We've all tried to do it. Okay. Me and Sergio tried to do it one time on the road. We walked up to the window. And you know what they do when you walk up to the window? They shut it real quick and they call the window. And they, you know what they do when you walk up to the window? They shut it real quick and they call the cops because they,

first of all, I think they did that because Sergio's Puerto Rican. But then I explained, he's a rapper, I'm his lawyer, and we were fine. But they will shut the fucking window

and they get upset and they say, we can't, they talk you through the glass because they think they're getting robbed. And we're just going, no, like, it was empty.

We had just already parked the car. So we were just trying to explain to them. And we were trying to go like, what's the difference? And I even said, can I sit like this? I said, what if my car's invisible? This is a new Tesla. It's invisible. Just give me the fucking sandwich.

And they're like, sir, we cannot serve anyone who's not in their car. Which is hilarious as if there's a difference between sticking a gun in someone's face through a fucking car window from a foot. Yeah. You know, I bet you this is the auto lobby that made them do that the auto lobby was like nobody will be able to get fed unless they have a car people need to buy more cars so that's what happened he went back to the window and he stood up and he said it and then they pointed a gun at his face and said no we can't give you the cash register i will die for little John Silvers.

And then that's when he got pissed. And he probably put his hand through the glass because he's a hard working Mormon who's got 10 wives. Do you know what the stress of 10 wives is going to cause you? A lot. You're going to want your diet soda to be with no ice if you ordered it that way. When you have 10 wives breaking your balls.

You think one wife is bad, okay? When you go to the religion expo and they tell you you can have as many wives as you want, it sounds good, just like all ideas, like communism, great idea, but once you have 10 wives and you fucked and made kids with all of them, now you got 10 ball breakers you gotta deal with.

It's gonna make you wanna go to a drive-thru with the son, take a little drive to blow off some steam and eat some mcdonald's fries and then some fucking snotty kid forgets the ice in your dc and that's when you fucking go berserk on the place and i bet you the kid didn't grab the pistol on his own i bet you the father son, grab the pistol out of the gun compartment and start plugging these pigs. Yep, that's what it says here. After the initial investigation that Johnson encouraged his son to shoot police officers

but didn't offer any further details. How did I call that? I called it. I knew he was angry, dog. I think I might have actually just given the accurate story. You do not know the pressure of a Mormon man with 10 wives in Utah. He actually ordered his son to start shooting cops. Dad of the year.

Imagine getting shot by a motherfucker that can't do his ABCs. That's got to really put into question your police training. You got to get his statement is written in crayon. Yeah. You got to really put into question your police training. You got to get his statement is written in crayon. Yeah. When you interview him as your lawyer trying to get the story,

you got to recreate it with blocks. This is funny. The Random Hero 77 says, Ben Shapiro is going to make a movie of this. Only the McDonald's employees will have AR-15s. Correct. They tried to arrest him as they noticed the gun pointing to them from the back of the seat. So he got a shot off. The officer swiped the weapon away from him as he got the shot off,

and he hit an officer's arm. Wow, good shot, kid. Yeah, and then the rest of the story goes, they got one shot off, but then one of the officers threw a toy from a Happy Meal at him and he dropped the gun and started putting the car rum-rum

on the back seat. Vroom, vroom. And then he was arrested by Grimace. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, that's what you do. If a kid starts

pointing a gun at you, you just fucking pull that toy out of that Happy Meal as quick as possible and throw it at him. And he'll be like, oh, sweet,

look at this. They still give away toys in the Happy Meal, right? I think so. Yeah. Yeah. In Utah, it's probably like

a tiny little book of Mormon. Yeah. All right. So we got this, we got this gay bill and then we'll get out of here. We'll leave you guys to get back to your driving,

whatever you're doing. Hopefully you're watching us. We're a couple of cute kids. You should be watching on YouTube. Yeah. Join Patreon, patreon.com slash Yanni Long Days for your weekly bonus episode.

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Also, my dates, which you heard at the beginning of the episode. So did I miss anything else? Follow jharvin15, jessiescaturo, all one word on Instagram. What else did I miss? That's about it. All right. So what is going on with this Don't Say Gay bill? Because this is one of the most complicated things I've heard.

This is in Florida, which, of course. So this seems like an extreme reaction to extremism. Yep. So they're trying to pass a bill because they don't want kindergartners holding up black faces or talking about non-binary issues

at the age of three when they should be playing with blocks or learning how to shoot police officers from the backseat. Correct. Right.

So, what is this bill? Let's listen to this Florida floozy and see what she says. Don't say gay bill requires educators to out LGBTQ students. As Fox 35's Brianna Arndondo reports, critics say it could lead to abuse. Here's the funny thing.

Can you pause it? The funny thing is, so they're saying it forces people to out kids. Tim Dillon is so masculine as a straight guy I think he could be telling them over and over again I'm gay and they'd be like no you're not we don't believe you they don't believe you only way you can find out Tim Dillon is gay is by his taste

but then Michael Bloomberg will go and be like I'm straight I have a family I swear to god and they'd be like you're fucking gay alright sometimes include sharing a family photo. I believe it was either, was it pre-K or kindergarten, where all the kids brought in a picture of their families. And of course, we brought in a picture of this too, Dad.

I love cute gay guy couples. It's something very cute about it. This one is very cool. First of all, it's interracial and it's gay. Double fucking progressive. Yeah, I like that. But there is something like just so two gay guys. I feel safer and more calm around a marriage because, you know, gay guys are usually like just a little wild for me. You know, my brother's gay. He's a great guy, but I know he parties. Gay guys party a little

too hard now that i'm i'm older and i got a family i'm like can you guys keep it down you know because gay guys like they wake up in the morning their alarm clock is like you know and then they're like fucking dancing around on roller skates just like abs everywhere yeah they go outside their clubs are always outside their brunches are always loud. There's music. They party. They're having a good time. They're celebrating

promiscuality. Is that a word? Promiscuousness. They have a great time. Being gay is great. I wish I was gay. You don't see calm gay couples.

No, but when you do, they're couples. Yeah. And you know that they're like the greatest people because they went through the ringer. They went through the ringer do they're couples yeah and you know that they're like the greatest people because they went through the ringer they went through the ringer and they're like monogamous and they're in love and it's just like there's something very calming and great about a gay couple just like you could see them and it's just very you know they're just kind of

together you know they've kind of they they probably scoff at promiscuous gay guys. Because every gay couple, you can assume that they're conservative in their values. They don't necessarily vote conservative, but they're hilariously conservative. They probably watch the gay parade and they're like, oh my God, can these guys please just put on a sports coat? Yeah. Oh my God.

You know their day is probably boring, just like a straight, like, you want a latte? I'm going to Starbucks. Yes, Dale, I'll get you a latte. Then they sit down and they like watch shows together. They argue together.

You hear dishes clanging, no talking during, you know, a couple's been together when you can hear fork noises more than words. You know, this couple has that. I mean, I mean i love it all right let's see what they say jeff and todd delmay tell us their son's classmates then asked about his mother but teachers won't be allowed to talk about sexual orientation it's just great that these guys now live in a generation where they don't have to

tell their parents for the first 20 years that this is my roommate for so long it's like this is my roommate uh mom and dad you know the rents in new york are crazy and they go well todd todd you own the empire state building you don't even know how crazy these rents are this is is my roommate. Me and Eric have been roommates for 18 years because Todd, you live in a townhouse on the Upper East Side. You bought it for 6 million. Oh, you should see the taxes in this town. They're horrible. That's why I so thank God I have my roommate, Eric. Todd, you and Eric are holding hands. Oh, it gets so cold in New York. We have to often hold hands to get warm.

It's so cold up here. It's nothing like Georgia, Mom, where you guys are so warm and cuddly and open-minded. All right. Under House Bill 1557, the parental rights bill, or what critics call the don't say gay bill. There are so many ways in which LGBTQ people are present in a child's world that to try and pretend that they don't exist is devastating. The bill's sponsor, state representative Joe Harding, says the bill prevents LGBTQ discussions among kindergarteners.

Now, we haven't seen Joe Harding yet. We haven't watched his video, but I'm going to assume he's an over 65- old southern white guy yeah let's take a look uh what's his name again white guy yeah hold on can you pause it it's not age appropriate it would be hilarious if it's just like a 37 year old just like it's just a guy just a guy in like a 37 year old. Just like it. Just a guy. Just a guy like a silver fucking glitter sharpie. Like it's just listen, we got to get rid of these gays. Look, if you're gay, don't tell my son about it. We're I'm from a straight family.

OK, I was from a straight. I'm from a Michael Bloomberg straight family. So stop it. You leave your gay shit at home. Jesus Christ. Next bill. Next bill. He walks away from the podium with like dress pants. There's like gay shit at home. Jesus Christ. Next bill. Next bill. He walks away from the podium with like dress pants.

There's like a hole cut out on the ass. Yeah, when he walks away, he just throws glitter in the air like Rip. What was his name? Rip Taylor. Any grade level. Let's stay focused. Oh, there he is. Pretty similar.

He's a closeted, closeted, old Southern white guy. You could tell by the way he's talking that at night he's a regular at a motel. He looks like the unmasking at the Scooby-Doo at the end of the episode. Old man Jenkins. And he sounds like one too. That's all. And let's realize that these children belong to families. They are not wards of the state. If a student did confide in a teacher, a new amendment added Friday would force school officials to tell their parents within six weeks.

What the fuck? Some parents, like Reagan Miller, say that could be dangerous if the family is not a safe space. As a parent, I always want my kids to feel safe and comfortable coming to me and if they didn't feel that they could come to me, I would want them to be able to go to their teacher. This fucking bill makes no sense. Confusing. Well, the two tenets I heard is this.

If you're gay, if your parents are gay, you can't talk about it, right? Which is fucking insane. Only Florida would come up with something this fascist. And then if you are gay and you confide in a teacher because you can't talk to your parents because your parents aren't into it,

the teacher is forced to out you to the parents who could probably do anything to you. I mean, what the fuck is Florida? This is all this country has become is just two extreme sides fighting while the rest of us is sitting quietly in a subway car with our goddamn Kindles, hoping that the crazy people go away.

One of us has to stand up and fucking tackle these terrorists before they hijack a plane. I mean, what the fuck does this bill even mean? I mean, you're making legislation for like kindergarten kids to be forced to not talk

about their two gay dads or to force or be forced to talk about that they are gay even if they're trying to hide it because maybe their parents aren't accepting. I mean, what the fuck is this fucking bill what are you doing florida i don't know

and you know i hate this too first of all i hate it because it's extremely oppressive unjust and fascist but the uh i also hate it because now this just gives more ammunition to the fucking other folks on the other side we'll go go back. You know what we're going to do, Florida? We're going to create 300 more genders. Because that's all they're doing is they're fighting with each other back and forth. Who can out extreme one another? This is an extreme reaction

to what they view as extreme stuff on the other side, which I will agree sometimes is extreme. You know, you shouldn't be talking about non-binary and gay shit in kindergarten. You shouldn't be talking about uh non-binary and gay shit in kindergarten you shouldn't be talking about slavery in kindergarten or preschool yeah we covered that in the last episode but you also can't state mandate that and it's always ironic that these small government fucks are the ones that are conveniently big government when it's for something that they want

as long as for something they want they're like we want the government to regulate abortion blah blah blah but you're like wait why would you want the government and you know it's like we want it uh we want the government saying you can't have a kid why it's that look i don't give a shit look if some parent wants to give their kid hormone therapy at three he ain't my fucking kid turn him into a unicorn for all I care. What the fuck do I care? It's your fucking kid. I'm not, you know. No need to overreach. No need to overreach.

I mean, are we for freedom or are we against it? Or are you only into the things that you like? Your kind of freedom. Your kind of freedom. Isn't freedom being able to do whatever you want with your fucking kid minus beating them or hurting them? Then some people will say, oh, well, that's abuse. You're abusing the kid. Yeah, maybe.

Maybe, maybe not. I don't know. I don't know. You're not hitting them. The kid said he wanted to be a girl. Kid might have said he also wanted to be a dandelion. Turn him into a dandelion. I'm supposed to pretend like I care?

Does anyone really care? Or are they just scared about what's going to happen to their kid? Overstepping, dog. This is going to make it weird for parent-teacher conferences now. Yeah, this is why I think we should just have two different extreme countries and then like in the middle. Let them fight it out in the middle and then the reasonable people who are reasonable enough to have opinions on both sides as an individual or whatever it is, those people take the coast

because let's be honest, the ocean property is a lot more beautiful. And the people who are caught up in this shit, they're just caught up in the fight. We don't want to fight. We just want to finger paint, fart, and make jokes. All right, let's go for some.

Anyone got anything else to say? No. Are you for it or against it? I'm against it. It's overstepping. It's a little too much. Parent-teacher conferences are going to be weird now.

Teachers are going to be sitting down like, Mr. and Mrs. Collins, your son Tim is great, straight-A student, but I think he likes dick. But I think he likes dick. You're like, whoa, whoa, whoa, he's four. It's like, yeah, he told me. It's too much. It's like, Tim, is great, straight-A student, but I think he likes dick. But I think he likes dick. And you're like, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, he's four. It's like, yeah, he told me.

It's too much. It's like, wait, why are you telling me? Now I have to kill him because I'm Christian. Jesse, I know you need more information, but how can we tie this to George Soros, and what are they trying to do? Tell me about how COVID is behind this. Oh, absolutely.

The World Economic Forum. They've got a lot to say about this is covet is behind this oh absolutely the world economic forum they got a lot to say about this they're behind this shit in china china's fucking behind it tick tock tick tock the whole fucking thing is behind these lgtbq students the bilderbergs the bilderbergs the coach brothers the coca brothers you know they got their hands in us don't say all right so this is just a weird bill. And if we understand it from this video correctly, that seems very odd. That seems like an odd thing to force, to put on kids. Because what you're essentially doing is you're putting this on kids.

It's the kids will be breaking the law. Look, this is a bill. This is a bill. Think about how crazy this is. So a kid will be breaking the law if he mentions that he has two gay dads. You're breaking the law as a kid. And then if you're a teacher

and your child comes to you, your student says, I'm gay. You know, he comes to you and he goes, he drops, you know, the kid probably walks over like, yeah. And the teacher probably goes, how was, how was, you know, how was intramural baseball today? And he goes, it was good. And he goes, teacher, can I just talk to you for a second?

I'm sick of doing that. Okay, that's not my real voice. Okay. I put the garden hose around, my parents went to sleep. I went out into the backyard. I put the garden hose around my neck and started singing Britney Spears, I'm a Slave for You. I pretended like it was the snake. I think I might be gay.

But if my parents find out, they're going to send me to a reeducation conversion therapy with Yano Mopanopoulos, who just opened up a new conversion therapy in Florida somewhere. And the teacher's going, sorry, kid. I got to tell your parents now or else I go to jail. That's what Florida's proposing, essentially. Florida, you never surprised me. You are the Fet in all of states. We used to do a segment on my old show at Fusion called What the Florida? It was an idea I came up with because the stories out of Florida, like the local stories you will get out of Florida are always crazy.

It's just a crazy state. It's just a crazy mix of rednecks, Cubans, other Latin people, old retired Jews. Haitians. Haitians. It's just a wild place. You go one mile in one direction, it's like punto, punto, cinco, nueve. And then you go one mile out and they're like, here's a gator fat.

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Welcome Nikos to the Fediverse, Tim, Dinesh Gunda, Seth Traver. Welcome, guys. Eli Kimberling. George Andrinopoulos. He's a Greek. Lillian. And then we got God bless those CCP squeaks that make my sneaks. That could be an all-timer. That could be an all-timer going back for both podcasts.

God bless those CCP squeaks that make my sneaks. Very good. And then we got, here's another good one that Jesse's going to love. I know Jesse's sense of humor. Mikey Farty Party. Then we got BL Madoff, Peter Tavernier, Steve Goetz, Adrian Chan, Marie R, Luke Grayland, Dustin Smith, Abraham Tucker, Jason, Bob Dwyer, Sean, Davina, Tom Moskalak, Jack Grogan, Steven Green, Adam Laughlin, Brian Jessup, William Johns, and Steven Sprague. Welcome, guys. Join us over there. We have a ball for your bonus episodes. You don't want to miss those every week, guys.