Yannis Pappas Hour - Take Your Vitamins Brother! - LongDays with Yannis Pappas - Episode 18

Episode Date: May 2, 2021

Whasdadealis! On this episode we got dr. Joe Rogan and the smart one from legion of skanks Dave Smith talking COVID cures, Yanni misses Whitney’s old co-host and show. He breaks down Trevor Noah’s take on the census and new congressional seats in a few red hot states, Ellen page got a makeover, Caitlin Jenner for president, tent cities, Marky Mark hate crime and a hack ripping off Maurica oh and Randy Quaid oh my! Yanni is off da rails and das what the deal is.   For weekly bonus episodes on weds and additional bonus content, here: https://www.patreon.com/yannilongdays   The show goes out every Sunday at noon to youtube and audio platforms but while it's being recorded the show goes LIVE on Yannis' Instagram!   Come join in on the LONG DAY   Follow Yannis Pappas Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/yannispappas/ Twitter - https://twitter.com/yannispappas Website - https://www.yannispappascomedy.com/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week, COVID in India taking it down. I mean, India said, can I order some food? And nature said, tikka masala COVID for India. The whole country's collapsing over COVID. Joe Rogan under fire for saying on his episode to a noted scholar from Legion of Skanks, David Smith, that young people should not get the vaccine.

They should fight COVID with jujitsu and vitamin X and some zinc does the trick. In other news, there's also a shooting in North Carolina where they're waiting for the body cam footage to release. It's like they're waiting for a new Jay-Z album to drop. Caitlyn Jenner's running for president. Randy Quaid is running for governor. I'm calling my publicist and I will be running for the governor and president of Crete, Greece. It's a great move. Elliot Page, formerly known as Ellen Page.

Don't know if she's added a dick to the pussy yet, but she will be being interviewed by Oprah. In other news, Giuliani's apartment's being raided. What else is new? This is Long Day's What's the Toast? When you all talked up and the day been long And the news online going on and on What's right and wrong and there's something up Now here comes a great kid you know you can trust From the true who's who to the news and cameras To the fake politics and the propaganda

Yeah this kid's screwed in, got a lot to say Ah shit, it's about to be a long day It's a long day, it's a long day coming Y'all what's up Dallas, welcome to Long Days Wow, do we got a barn burner for you this week brother It's a long day, it's a long day coming It's a long day, it's a long day coming It's a long day, it's a long day coming It's a long day, it's a long day coming Yo, what's up Dallas? Welcome to Long Days. Wow, do we got a barn burner for you this week, brother. I am jet lagged, and that's just because I did Whitney Cummings' podcast. I mean, talk about a time difference.

We did five hours on Whitney Cummings' podcast. Who knows what the name of it is? She has a name, but I just call it Whitney, because I can't get over the fact that her and her co-star, Chris D'Elia, don't talk anymore. I can't get over the fact that that show got canceled. So whatever your podcast name is, Whitney, I'm just going to call it Whitney.

Did I have a theme song? Whitney, Whitney. Here's my best friend, Chris D'Elia. His father grew up a producer, so he passed down the talent for the entertainment business, also for fucking young chicks, which he used to be able to get away with in Hollywood. And every episode, I'm going to do a Broadway play. Now, how great a Broadway play would that be? Where some producer goes, listen, son,

I'm going to tell you all about the business. And also, my grandfather passed this down to me and I'm passing it down to you, okay? Here's how you pick up 16-year-olds. It's national news. What do you want me to do? I was never friends with the guy. So as Tim Dillon says

I gotta do my job so yeah I am jet lagged from Los Angeles I spent about 12 or 14 hours there I'm just kidding all that was a joke I didn't mean a word of it it's you know what are you gonna do yeah it's just in the news I can't help't know? So, and then I was in Austin again before that. I saw my good friend, Joe Rogan. I love Joe Rogan. And Joe Rogan is obviously under fire because he was sitting down with, I mean, if you were gonna put together,

I love all three of them. They're friends of mine. But if you were gonna put together, you could put that Legion of Skanks together, the podcast Legion of Skanks, very popular, very funny podcast with Jay Oakerson, Louis J. Gomez, the intellectual Puerto Rican, Rattlesnake, and Dave Smiths, everyone's favorite college dropout libertarian. And so if you were going to create a podcast, like pretty soon there's going to be like a producer, like there was the Mickey Mouse Club. What was his name? The fat guy who you know was diddling boys.

Perlman. Lou Perlman. You're telling me Lou Perlman didn't explore Ryan Gosling's asshole on a few occasions. You telling me he didn't throw Justin Timberlake in a backpack and make him suck his lollipop for pop stardom. You ain't got nothing coming.

Because why get into the business? There he is. Wasn't he caught for something too? Here's the deal. If you're a male camp counselor or you're a boy band producer who puts them together, there is about a 57 to 76% chance that you are sexually attracted to minors.

I'm just throwing it out there because why are you a camp counselor what grown man wants to be around kids that aren't his own okay gooseling that's how i pronounce it you're wrong it was rita perlman i don't know what you're talking about ricky b takes mke make your screen names funnier because we're playing russian roulette down there. And I don't want, I want to read funny names. Oh baby, sucking farts from the little boys. Exactly. That's what Lou Pearlman like to do.

Bring the heat. Bring the heat, long haulers. Bring the fucking heat. For the dollars those guys make, Pearlman, those guys like Pearlman can have his way with my firstborn. So there you go. That is a good point. If he's going to make that kid

a star and provide that type of money, maybe you look the other way when Perlman says, can I take him on a date to Chuck E. Cheese? Who knows? Who knows? But so Joe Rogan came under fire. Because I was saying, pretty soon there's going to be like producers who put together podcasts the way they put together boy bands right so there's going to be a guy being like okay we need one intellectual we need one we need one like kind of like in a slain clown posse kind of heavy metal kind of funny one that's the jay one right and then we're going to need we need one dangerous one if you think about legion of skanks they are new kids on the block, right? Like Louis J. Gomez.

Louis J. Gomez is Donnie Wahlberg, right? Donnie Wahlberg was the one with the leather jacket. I'm from the other side of the tracks, fucking car. You know what, he went from Boston. He's like, I'm from the other side of the fucking tracks. And let alone, you haven't even met my fucking brother. You haven't met my fucking brother because he likes to punch Taiwanese people and hate crimes. By by the way marky mark yeah my marky mike marky mark catholicism

is not going to protect you from the fact that google exists because you should have been tweeting respect asian lives every day because one as Asian is blind because of you. You guys remember that? You're too young to know that Marky Mark punched an Asian kid. Yeah, he punched an Asian guy in a hate crime when he was young and the guy went blind. And then he created the song, Hanging Tough. What was his song?

Come on, come on. Feel it, feel it. The funky part. Yeah, feel this punch in the eye that made you go blind. Feel this hate crime. Come on, go blind. Feel this hate crime. Come on, come on. Feel this hate crime. Right in your face, Asian man.

Because you're not fucking from around here. This is fucking Boston. You get the fuck out of here. If you're a little fucking darker than my fucking white converse, I want you fucking out of here, you corksucker. So if you think about it, Legion of Skanks is kind of like the podcast version of New Kids on the Block. You could put them together the same way New Kids on the Block were put together by New Editions manager who wanted to make money.

Because New Editions manager was like, yo, New Editions, these guys are all black and talented, but yo, white girls aren't allowed to listen to them because they're fathers. So let me just take this model and use it and put together white guys that emulate new edition and make some money because they can hang the poster and say daddy oh my god take me to see jc sajez or whatever his fucking name is take me to see toby mcguire i don't know what their names are because i'm not a gay kid i was listening to slick rick you hurt doing the running man i was doing the running man you hurt i had an african man dying doing a kid and play kick step i grew up with hip-hop you know i mean because i'm like girls girls don't like boys so yeah some producer would go okay we need like we need like the funny

fat one who's kind of like who kind of is like you know looks like he's into like slipknot and we need the dangerous one. We need the Donnie Wahlberg, the one who's from the other side of the tracks. His parents got killed in a knife fight, you know? So that's true. And then we need the smart one, the nerdy one, okay? The one with glasses, the Lisa Loeb guy,

the one who fucking talks about government policy and shit like that. We throw them all together, brought to you by the- And that is Legion of Skanks baby my boys so joe rogan was on the podcast with our good friend uh very funny hilarious dave smith and um joe rogan came under fire because he said he would tell he he thinks a lot of people should get the vaccine so that was good he said that and then he said, you know, but I would tell very young, healthy people to not get it.

What people don't know is Joe Rogan in his spare time, not only does he sell on it pills and dumbbells, he's also been doing a lot of side research on the vaccine for MIT, amongst other places, I think Cambridge as well and I think he's down there at the University of Austin also playing with some of the variants so he can figure out different sequences of DNA and smart words smart words smart words and smart words that eggheads who are born eggheads can understand so he's trying to actually he's working

on sequencing and DNA variants and compositoriness of sort of the nucleus of the variant of the strand in the vaccine and the vaccinization process and things like that. So a lot of people don't know that when he said that all you need is to eat your spinach, brother. I mean, couldn't that have been the same advice from Hulk Hogan? Hulk Hogan would have been like, all right, brother, all you got to do is take your vitamins

and make sure you drink an egg raw, brother, and don't let that cocaine run wild on you. Don't let that COVID-19 run wild on you. I am born American, USA. What was the song it came out to? Real American Hero. Born down in a dead man What was the song it came out to? Real American Hero. Born down in a dead man's No, it's Bruce. Real American Hero. I'm a real American

Hero. COVID ain't getting me with these pythons. Take your vitamins, brother. Don't let COVID take you. That's the real vaccine. That's Florida's vaccine, brother. Yeah. Don't take no Chinese vaccine so yeah uh what people people don't know is uh what happened was Joe Rogan was doing a character piece okay he was saying look

imagine I was fucking Hulk Hogan and I was fucking Donnie and I was doing a fucking if he just said a character piece after that then Joe Rogan experience, which sign behind it is of an alien craft underneath the words Joe Rogan experience, had prompted he wants to do can sway elections or actually sway populations from getting or not getting the vaccine, that's not Joe Rogan's fault. This is a failure of public education. And I've said it many times, Aristotle warned and America hasn't heeded. The future of any civilization, he said, or empire, however you want to put it, is dependent on public education. No matter how capitalist you are or libertarian, I love you guys. You guys are like, it's like having a fucking freshman conversation with someone who loves Ayn Rand. He believed, I don't think anyone can deny that public education needs to be well-funded, have a high standard, et cetera.

Look at Finland, look at Scandinavia, et cetera, et cetera. So no matter how much of a capitalist you are, you have to have public education. It needs to be strong so people can be taught to think. They don't even teach logic to these kids. They don't teach philosophy. They just tell you to read The Catcher in the Rye and then the rest of it do online.

They say, hey, read this book, The Catcher in the Rye, and then we'll have a multiple choice quiz that you can completely Google while you're at home online because of COVID. So our education is a failure. And that's why, maybe that's why he's become so influential for a lot of these things.

But Joe Rogan's obviously the best. He has all these intellectuals on. And I'm glad Joe Rogan exists because he's at least provided other thinkers on to push back against this wokeness which is a fucking mind virus as as i've said as tim dylan has said um and it's really a problem so at least he's given um he's put on some intellectuals and scientists and stuff that push that back he's also uh you know really embraced the new medium where he lets someone talk for four hours in this era where people are judging people for tweets and soundbites people are not their tweets

okay people are not their words okay if i say i want to kill my wife that doesn't mean you go oh my god yannis is a murderer look at what he said it's called context people um so but that's what joe rogan's opinion is for whatever reason. It's sad that he has to come under such fire for having an opinion. But again, he would be the, probably the first to tell you that he's not an expert. He doesn't work at MIT though. That was sarcasm. You know, he's an expert in jujitsu. He's an expert in MMA. He's an expert in comedy. He's an expert in podcasts. He's, he's an expert in being able to kick you in the chest and do the same amount of damage COVID can to your lungs. So you should know as an educated person,

hey, let me do my own research. Let me listen to some experts who actually do work in the lab and who create vaccines and work on manipulating viruses and understand pandemics, et cetera. Listen to them. I mean, it would almost be like a scientist coming in and having a podcast and going like, you know what? I think Dustin Poirier doesn't have a standup game. Okay. Of course, MMA people are going to be like, he's improved his standup game. He knocked out Conor McGregor. He went toe to toe with Max Holloway, who's considered maybe pound for pound, one of the best boxers in MMA. And Poirier stood up and struck with him. Yeah, because that is someone who knows MMA, okay? So just take it like that, okay? Imagine a scientist talking about MMA. I think Joe Rogan

might get, I have a few words to say about that as well. And that's why I think a few scientists were like, Joe, can we talk? Joe, can we talk? Can we talk? Do you remember Joan Rivers? Can we talk? She was a beast, maybe the goat. She used to rip those people apart in the dresses. She had straight dudes turning in so she could rip those people apart, even though her face looked like she was a panther.

That's what happens when you do too much plastic surgery because Los Angeles is a sick place. You're a sick puppy. Okay. Now the daily show, um, once one of the most influential shows on television that was sort of a response, uh, and was bred by Fox op Op-Ed, cable news shows that were heavily editorialized, of course, by Big Pop himself, who Colbert, Stephen Colbert, satirized. What's his name? He was sexual charges. Oh, Bill O'Reilly. Bill Thompson. Bill O'Reilly.

Bill O'Reilly. So this came up as a response to sort of Bill O'Reilly. Bill Thompson. Bill O'Reilly. Bill O'Reilly. So this came up as a response to sort of Bill O'Reilly and his popularity. And The Daily Show used to crush it. And Jon Stewart was a towering intellectual as well as a absolutely gifted comedian and would often, you know, poke fun at things and be flawless at it, would show you the hypocrisy and things like that. And of course he leaned left and of course he exposed more of the right. But at the time, the right was really like fucking flying off the handle. Now the left, they've become the

religious right, which is hilarious. It used to be because he was poking fun of the religious right, which was sort of like the fringe element of the right that had hijacked the right and had the right pandering to them the way the left now has been hijacked by the religion of wokeness and it's a religion and they pandered to that fringe. So culturally, the right used to pander to the born again crowd, right? And now the left panders to the woke crowd. They're both religions and it's flipped. So now you got Trevor Noah from South Africa. Good thing.

You know, if you're going to talk about the American culture and American politics, you're going to want to find someone who never lived in America to host your show, to really connect with the people, you know? So I'm glad they had to outsource for that. You're sending a really good message about how you really don't give a shit about the working people when even for your show's host, you fucking outsourced. I mean, do you think the working class in the Rust Belt is going to listen

to Trevor Noah who went to a Swiss private school. I don't think apartheid was too hard on Trevor Noah, to be honest with you. Not to make light of apartheid, of course, because apartheid was horrible and a real thing. But I think Trevor Noah somehow escaped the hardships of that. I just have a hunch. I don't even know even know can you look up did he go to a Swiss school he's just got a face like he went to a Swiss school I hope if I'm right that's going to be hilarious but so Trevor Noah has uh he he did a clip that's gone viral now he's talked about the census people on here are crazy haters for sure. I don't know what's going on in the chat, but I like it. I like the drama.

We need a Yanni and Tim Dillon podcast. Go listen to the episode with me and Tim Dillon on his podcast. And then his Patreon episode, we did too. So Trevor Noah did a clip from his living room on the socially distanced or whatever quarantine daily show where, holy shit, I'm laughing my ass off. Love you too, Roger Carly. Rogers Carly. I don't know her name is carly rogers or something she's

a country singer in natchville and she's really good even though i don't like country music okay but my wife does okay country music is for people who are barely sliding into human it's like a play at the plate and they can only understand lyrics that talk about cracking a beer my jeans my, and getting mud on my boots. No, they're good love stories. I came home and the flag was down, so I put it back up because it fell down. So the wind is communist, the wind is communist, and I fought for the flag. Don't let the wind blow her down. Put my feet in the sand on a vacation in mexico because people listen to country music and only afford vacations at all inclusives in mexico cancun and i put on zach brown band and i hiked up my jeans and then my wife came home and i fucked her

good then we went to church and we cracked an apple pie and a beer but it was a bud light lime because i support american i bought a cadillac it broke down 16 times but i still got it repaired and then i bought a korean car and it drives much better and i don't tell my friends i keep it a secret because i support the president and by president i mean donald Trump my lord and savior I really get sidetracked on this show once in a while Trevor Noah so he made a video about the census saying that New York has lost a congressional seat because they do the census and by population wherever population increases it increases I don't know if you know they add a congressional seat. Sorry, did I just say Senate? Congressional seat they add based on population.

So supposedly, apparently, there's been unprecedented fall off in population. And Trevor Noah was saying that's due to low immigration, maybe because of the Trump administration. I guess that's the fucking implication. And low birth rates for whatever other reason. I don't know because fucking Marvin Gaye's dead. I don't know. Maybe Keith sweat needs to come back so we can make some more babies.

I mean, you can't really fuck to some of the new techno or Drake, you know, R and B is just not what it used to be. You know what I'm saying? You need Keith sweat back. You need a little Joe to see. You need a little Joe to see you need a little Jodeci to

fucking stroke you got the week the weekend's good but weekend's too fast paced I'm talking about bringing back Jodeci where they're in fucking those guys are in Timbo's on they're they're they're in the desert with Timbo's and the wind is blowing their their their wind blower open they're wearing a fucking Lacoste jacket it's just blowing and all you see is a chain and a six-pack what happened to d'angelo he's fat now he could get covid d'angelo please get vaccinated so what so ted cruz and trevor noah went into a twitter war because it's 2021 and we're at the end of an empire and you have senators and millionaire, multimillionaire TV hosts going at it on Twitter because that's the schoolyard for adults. That's what Twitter is, the schoolyard for adults. It's pathetic, but also I love it.

And basically, and he's right, Ted Cruz is implying, hey, people have fled those states, obviously because of COVID, one of the reasons. And the other reason is because, yes, taxes, taxes. And when I say taxes, I'm almost saying the state where they fled to, taxes. Tejas, no state tax. Florida's population's increased. Texas's population's increased. North Carolina's population's increased, et cetera. Nashville's booming. It's not a coincidence that those are Republican red states. And obviously, one of the main focus points of the Republican Party is low taxes. And a lot of those states have zero state tax. So of course, after the pandemic, the economy's in need. The Fed is bumping everyone's taxes up.

And a lot of these states like New York and California are looking to fucking nail you over the head if you make $400 or more, which is not that much money in today's day. They're going to fucking hammer the estate taxes, stepped up basis. So people aren't stupid. And you see what happens when the chips are down. You see what happens. People care about their pocket because they're hypocrites and everyone votes their interests. So now these people who vote blue for the most part are fucking fleeing because they don't want to go broke rebuilding a country that was burned down by the same policies that allowed it to happen so california supposedly is losing a congressperson and new york i think is losing because uh somewhere else is adding

and that that place would be texas it a funny how close Texas and Texas are Texas uh make AOC bartend again thank you Brendan Brown 2095 I have a debate today are humans more good than evil you're a natural philosopher Dylan Jones you just found your hidden talent my friend are good are people good or bad? I don't know. Ask my seventh month old daughter. So guess what? So Trevor Noah, I mean, I love watching you in your show,

in your living room, pretend like you give a shit about what's going on in America. How great would it be to commentate on America and then just hop on a private jet and go back to South Africa and eat whale blubber with whatever king is over there now? I don't know who's over there now. I love Trevor Noah too. He's a very funny comedian, but I mean, we got to get back to roasting both sides. You're a comedian. I love my expression. I'm not a Republican. I'm not a Democrat. I'm a comedian. And I will continue to be until I die. There's

too many Democrats and Republicans, and I believe that they're both important. They balance each other out and they need to constantly vacillate and oscillate according to the times and according to context and need. Sometimes we need a little bit more left policy. Sometimes we need a little bit more of a tax break to stimulate the economy. Okay. They're both necessary in the tug of war that they employ and that they engage in is very important to a functioning economy and a functioning free democracy um we don't need our comedians to be fucking pundits we got enough of those so comedians get back to breaking fucking everybody's balls or ovaries or lack thereof or whatever you identify as your ovaries.

What are they going to go even further and be like, those aren't my ovaries. Those are my thumbs. My ovaries are right here. These are my tonsils. You call them tonsils. They're my ovaries, okay? That's why I drink a bag of sperm because I'm not a straight. I don't identify as cis.

I don't identify as cis, so I don't deal with penises, but I will drink a bag of sperm from a gay, non-binary person who only put it in the sperm bank with the understanding that it would impregnate my tonsils, because I am a they, and my tonsils are my ovaries, because they identify as such. James Carleville just released a whole treaties on how wokeness is destroying the Democratic Party

and how alarming it is that Donald Trump got like 70 plus million votes. You think, you think, you think it's weird that all these people are being homeschooled now because their teachers are making them repeat a Pledge of the Legion mantra to 127 genders? Going, hi, I need you to respect everyone's pronouns. Over here, her name is a sound, and she identifies as them. So now we're going to be teaching you bad grammar in order to not hurt anyone's feelings, no matter how crazy those

feelings are. So we're off the reservation. Sorry, you can't even say that because I'm offending Native American people. Jesus Christ, there aren't any in the room. And by room, I mean country. India's under fire with COVID. Holy shit, that place is on fire. India's got another spike of COVID hitting them pretty hard. The thing about India, if you're COVID, you're going to really love India. Okay. I believe COVID went and got its citizenship of India because it was like, holy fuck, dude, what are we doing in Arkansas? COVID, the Brazilian strand came along and said, fudgy, fudgy. Who's shmala? Just shmala.

Just Portuguese. Just shmala. Fudgy, fudgy. So the Brazilian strand sat down with the Wuhan strand and the Wuhan strand said, oh, how come we're in Arkansas? And then the Japanese version said, and then the Jamaican brand said, yeah, brethren, there's no people in Arkansas. I love my job. How am I going to explain this to my daughter that daddy's at work?

So the Brazilian strand got together. Fadji, Fadji, Fadji. I only know Fadji because I watch Brazilian porn and I think that means fuck me. Fadji, right? Fadji. Fadji. Portuguese sounds like you're speaking Spanish

with marbles in your mouth or something. Fadji, Fadji, Fadji. So they got together and said, why are we doing in Arkansas? There's no people. There's no people. There's no people. Let's go to India where there's too many people. So, I mean, COVID is fucking jumping around like mono over there in a private school sorority.

I mean, COVID is jumping around India, like an SDT sorority at Hofstra. And if you, I mean, that should be funnier to you, Jesse, if you knew what mono is.

Mono is a kissing. It's the kissing flu. Okay. Whores get it. to you, Jesse, if you knew what mono is. Mono's a kissing. It's the kissing flu. Okay? Whores get it. Telling people he's a famous singer in the mamas and the papas. Yeah, tell people that. Tell people that.

People hanging off on trains. Yes. Yeah, it's really, you know, it's really easy to catch COVID in India when you got two guys walking down the street holding each other's pinky. I mean, COVID probably, COVID probably figure out, yo, we got to mutate so we get on people's pinky, son. The Kama Sutra, when you're fucking for too long, that's not good with COVID.

You're giving yourself a higher chance of getting with COVID. So the Kama, because Indians are sleepy. They have the Taekwondo of fucking. I mean, the Kama Sutra is the martial arts of making women come, dude. Like they should, why has yoga gotten big here, but the Kama Sutra hasn't? Why is that? Why are Western people into stretching and joining cults in Washington?

I mean, remember the, you saw that documentary? You saw a documentary about the Bhagwan? Yeah, yeah, well, you know, yeah, white people joined some cult. Yeah, I mean, fucking white people, tikka masala, they'll join a yogi's cult all their stretch, but they won't take the Indian's advice on how to fuck like an alien

and vibrate in a pussy and make you cum 100 times? What's up? We don't have our priorities straight. That's because we have this Protestant fucking fucking guilt about sex get over it we got to be more like the french dude fuck somebody today so caitlin jenner's running for governor california i mean thank god somebody's gonna swoop in isn't it great that a former triathlete as a man then put a murder while she was driving, became a woman and a global icon, much like Elliot Page, who's going to be your vice president of of California, Elliot Page. for you. Elliot Page? Yeah. I mean, talk about two people whose relevancy was slipping until they decided to change genders. Is fame such a drug that you will do anything or are they just really has Bruce Jenner always felt like a woman? Because let me tell you something. If Bruce Jenner

has always felt like a woman, that woman loved using his dick to create people and have straight sex. How many fucking Kardashians did he push out with his dick? I mean and have straight sex how many fucking kardashians did he push out with his dick i mean for a guy who wanted to live his last quarter of his life as a woman he loved fucking him so that's what makes me suspicious that he's transitioned for the fame because it wasn't like he was running during the triathlete like rupaul and they're going like and then when people it's not like when he transitioned, people were like, you know, make sense, you know? It's almost like if Richard Simmons was finally like,

just came out with long hair and was like, I know it's late, times have changed. I wanted to do this a long time ago. And people would be like, God bless Richard Simmons. He's living his true truth. We knew all along. But when one of the greatest athletes that's ever walked the face of the earth

who happened to also use his dick to make six kids and have girlfriends and continue to say that he still likes to fuck women even though he chopped his dick off, you're going to say maybe this has something to do with the fact that you killed somebody with your car because if Bruce Jenner disappears into the body of a woman,

Caitlyn Jenner didn't kill somebody, Bruce did. And also, it brings his relevancy up to the forefront. I mean, now he's running for fucking governor. And by him, I mean her.

I'm sorry, I was talking about Bruce when he was Bruce. So I was talking about the past. It's a character piece. It's called A Firefighter who doesn't identify fucking non-binary shit.

I'm a fucking firefighter. You can't blame me for being from Canarsie. All right? I'm from fucking Ridgewood, Queens. It's Rudy's fucking bakery. Shout out. Bagel boy. Bagel boy.

Okay? Your small talk that you made with me today because you know who I am is not going to cut the fact that I got another day old bagel today. I want my bagels fucking fresh. I'm a New Yorker. Okay. If you see this face come in, especially if I'm coming in with a half Jew, I know when the lox is fresh and they know when the bagel's not fresh. Okay. Don't make me call my rabbi and we have a conversation with you. Don't make me do it. Don't make me do it bagel boy ladder 13 very funny ladder three dollar bill so caitlin and ellian page her vice president by the way how much were you guys thinking about

what was her name before how much were you thinking about ellen page before she transitioned into elliot and boy is she gonna be a little guy now here's the deal this goes out to my good friend joe rogan as well i i support your point about like women who transition into men uh i'm sorry men who transition into women fighting um women um in mma that's obvious i think most people see that now but if elliot if elliot page elliot page wants to compete against the guys i am equally against that because the only sport she should be doing is midget tossing that is a small guy imagine high-fiving that fucking kid you walk in and he's just right up to your waist he just tries to reach up but he can't it's like uh trying to get you know it's like a baby trying to get to the cookie jar and you're going hey cuz let me just come down and

give you five what's up dog you listen to the new nirvana album he's like yeah you know i listen to a pretty good boss you know it's man's manly, sadly, a page. You know, every once in a while, you know, his voice starts to sound a little like this, but you can tell he's still a girl. I mean, that is a fucking manly looking man right there. He should work security. So Ellen Page is a guy, a new guy. He's one years old

and he is being interviewed by Oprah now. So there he is, Ellen, yeah. Looks like an Irish kid who kind of grew up in Bay Ridge a little bit. Ellen Page is now going to be interviewed by Oprah because of course now Ellen Page is a hero to be interviewed by Oprah because of course now Ellen Page is a hero to the trans community and Oprah's going to interview her

Oprah had no interest in interviewing Ellen Page so I'm just wondering if it has anything to do with it and I support I support the ticket of Caitlyn Jenner and Elliot Page for governor of, what is it,

the second or third biggest economy? I mean, California has a bigger economy than most countries. And there she is, Miss America, Caitlyn Jenner. And to borrow a phrase from yanni biden's what is it tracy morgan i'll fuck i'll fuck caitlin in the ass i'll fuck an asshole i saw that once that live at the stand

and i was cracking up he's like i'll fuck i'll fuck i'll fuck caitlin jenner i'll fuck her ass uh what who is having that conversation i don't know what you're talking about miller I'll fuck Caitlyn Jenner. I'll fuck her ass. What? Who is having that conversation? I don't know what you're talking about, Miller Jeff 99, but I hope you guys are talking to each other. Elliot got to get on that deca. Don't know what that means. Where's Derek at?

Right here, brother. You obviously tuned in late. So hats off to Elliot Page. Elliot, what's up? Let's catch a game together dog now um this is the country we live in but caitlin jenner has some steep competition for california governor do you guys know who that is you know randy quaid, the comedian Randy Quaid. And I don't know. Yeah. I mean, this is like my standup coming true. It's scary. You have to admit our collapse is a lot more hilarious than

Rome. Although I fear that the only thing that can keep us together is a dictator. And I feel like that's what's going to happen next. And we deserve it. We need it. And hopefully at some point that dictator will do like Nero did. Nero used to roam around with a posse in disguise and beat up homeless people. And he was in his disguise because people would recognize him because he was the emperor of Rome. But just for shits and giggles in between fucking a horse and marrying himself or marrying a guy and calling himself the woman, which he did, he would roam the streets of Rome late at night with a posse and beat up homeless people. We're about 10 years away from that.

I think the Randy Quaid administration might usher in that era. And it'll start in Venice with Randy Quaid just going around, uh, breaking up 10 cities. I mean, dude, have you seen Venice recently? Yeah, dude. Venice looks like the biggest camp. It looks like a native American tribe has moved into the beach. It's just all tense and homeless people in Venice. So the comedian Randy Quaid, who is very hilarious and is known for his vacation movies, which he's hysterical, he was on SNL for a little while as well. But he hasn't been seen in a while, and that is because he went to Georgetown Law. He has been in the Senate for 14 years. He understands common law well. He went to England, to Oxford, and studied John Locke,

common law, logic. He got very familiar with the works of Aristotle and has decided he wants to take this deep knowledge of justice and law and really bring it to the California capital. I'm calling my publicist and I'm saying, let's run for something because that is a good way to get into the news. Or maybe I should just start living as Maurice a full time. There is a guy who is fucking ripping off Maurice is so bad right now. He's getting very popular. People have been tagging me and putting me up. Throw this fucking golf guy up.

His name is Manola something. Now you tell me if he found Maurese's old YouTube video somewhere let's take a little peekaboo at something that has nothing to do or doesn't resemble Maurese at all this just lets you know how impactful that character was that was created 10 years ago, which by the way, who many celebrities watched and contacted me about. Take a peek. You got to, yeah, some golf kid, Manolo something. See you in Norwalk tonight, brother.

And you better be funny. I will be in Atlantic City, guys, May 7th and 8th. Get your fucking tickets. it's gonna be wild, the great Sergio Tico is coming with me, Blizzy himself, so me and Sergio, May 7th and 8th, Atlantic City at the Celebrity Theater, there's still some tickets, get them at yannispappascomedy.com or google them dude and buy the tickets drew made a flyer of it and it looks like uh it looks like it's a funeral flyer it looks like it's a flyer telling you that your jamaican neighbor's grandmother died and can you come to the

reception there's gonna be oxtail and beef patties is why sean still alive in 2021 ethan l bergen yes why sean is called body glove now shine you hurt yeah me yeah me so can you guys pull this up away the cdc has finally released its statement that you can take your fucking mask off take your fucking mask off. Take your fucking mask off. Mars has oxygen. Take it off. But in typical bureaucratic fashion, they're not quite clear, right? So it's like, if you've been vaccinated,

you can take off your mask if you're walking, jogging with family. And then there's one, if you're in a small gathering with family members who are vaccinated or not vaccinated. Can we just say, guys, if you've been vaccinated, take your fucking mask off? How about that one? How about that one? What are we trying to warm us into? What is this, okay, you can take your mask off if you're walking alone or you're not in a big crowd. I thought the vaccine protects you from serious illness from covet here he is so just go to yeah go to the one in the third this is uh now you tell

me if this reminds you of a little someone don't even say his fucking name this kid but you can just we'll watch on the podcast okay for serious right now everyone needs to take it easy everyone just take it easy because i need to thank thank Lee from the Colorado Golf Blog for everything that is taking place right the heck now. And that's it. And for real, I need to thank my maniacs, all the new ones, all the new followings, all the new followers. Check it out, Mike. Strap it in. Strap it on.

This is not the Magic Mountain roller coaster. This is the roller coaster that's going to go in places that they cannot boot in the magic mountain i'm going to make the magic and you're going to be a part of it and that's it i want to thank everybody for following that and everybody needs to remember the two things do you need to what why would that and then what is after that you smack that and some of my higher that's it i mean i mean yeah and he changed his photo from he used to I mean, I mean, yeah. And he changed his photo from, he used to, now that all my fans are hitting his page, his photo had Dassid on his knuckles. I mean, how did he think he was going to get away with it?

I think he probably thought like it's 10 years ago. He probably went to my page. I don't do it that much. I don't know, but he's getting popular. I mean, cause some big golf blog posted it. So like his followers are now at 85,000. He was at 35,000. He's doing my character. I mean, the bit works. It just lets you know it is a popular bit. It's so popular. Cardi B kind of adopted it. she became one of the most famous people in the world. That, not really. But this guy is already popping off doing Marisa. So not only was she fucking popular and funny when she, she's so funny, she's funny when other people rip her

off doing a bad Al Pacino impersonation from Scarface. How bad do people want their entertainment right now? That's how you know we're at the end, dude. You know it's at the end when you turn on YouTube and it's fucking street pranks. The street pranks and prank comedy, what they do is satiate the fat, lazy, and stupid. And then you got the woke comedy that satiates the overeducated, spoiled, and stupid. over-educated, spoiled, and stupid. This is the end. Beautiful friend. And that's it.

He's not even doing it good. It's like a hack. Scarface and Marisa had a baby. Yeah, it's like if a bad impressionist of Al Pacino and Scarface and a bad impression of Marisa had a baby. And that's what's coming now. Do you know what I'm had a baby. And that's what's coming now. You know what I'm trying to say.

I mean, it couldn't have been more of a knockoff of Marisa, but what can you do? He's a golf teacher. He's a golf teacher, but he's obviously created like a character. He's not even on the tour or anything. No, he's just a golf teacher who's doing a character who watched the video, obviously, and thought it was funny

and just ran with it, dude. I mean, why not? And people are loving it. And it's what it is. And he'd probably say, oh, no, I never came across that video. I just... It's just a coincidence, you know? The same intonation and the same thing, you know? the same intonation and that's the same thing, you know,

like, I mean, same fucking thing. So did you guys know the Oscars happened? Yeah. Do you know, um, I found out that the Oscars happened after they happened.

Someone was like, ah, so I saw a tweet and I was like, oh shit, I couldn't believe it. I can't believe people are amazed that the ratings were so low. I can't believe the ratings were so high. I didn't know that many people were tuning in.

I mean, go figure. People don't want to watch multimillionaires get on stage and harangue them on social justice. Go figure, you know? Go figure. Talk about, you know what's funny? What's funny is these are the same people that will probably criticize Joe Rogan

for his opinion on vaccinations because he's not an expert, but they will talk to you about climate change and poverty and social justice. And what does their resume consist of? Oh, a Quentin Tarantino movie. You know, one Quentin Tarantino movie and a few indies. I don't even know these people during this Oscar.

Yeah, dude, Drew, you're Gen X. You're like, where is Jake Paul? I mean, who are these guys? I mean, Jesus Christ christ look at that dude it looks like people at a trivia night in brooklyn at a bar got dressed up for the night and handed each other gold statues these people are out of touch and they need to get robbed i can't wait for them to return from their parents homes in nantucket to their brooklyn brownstones and find the window smashed and their dog dead. They're going like, let's go to the gate. And they're walking up Fifth Avenue and Third Street

and somebody comes and says, yo, but but posse is back family. Run your shit and buy my weed. Send Yanni and Tim Dillon to the Oscar dogs. You're idiots, but they were in the Avengers, so obviously know what they're saying. Yanni, four eyes. Yes. I would watch the Oscars if De Niro and Pesci took their penis together. Small penis Yanni. There you go.

I thought I was watching BET because the Oscars were black at this year. See, that's what comment roulette's all about. Yeah, those are things i can't say but i read it off there it doesn't count maybe that's what happened all the guilty liberal people who pretend to love black entertainment maybe turned it on and thought it was the bet. So they kept scrolling and went to Netflix

and put on another episode of Friends and watched it again. Because all you have to do is tweet for the gram and then you can go sip champagne at Bourgeois Dois.

Mimosa. There was a champagne at breakfast that's called uh mimosa those uh champagne at breakfast is called a mimosa so the oscars did happen uh giuliani's house is being raided because they're trying to um they're trying to find uh evidence of how his hair is liquid they're trying to find some sort of evidence about his business dealings in ukraine when he was trying to procure evidence uh uh concerning the biden administration's ties to ukraine through hunter biden so i think that's why the feds are raiding his apartment but look if you're gonna seize a guy's electrical devices be a man and give him a chance to clear the fucking at least Google history, dog.

I mean, he's not going to be doing any business with some Ukrainian oil tycoons on Google. So don't let his daughter see that he was looking at trans porn or midget porn or blacks on blondes. You know, it's just not anyone's business. Men should do that for each other. The way the journalists used to not report

on jfk's hooker pool parties at the white house fed agent should come in and be like dog we're seizing your electronics we're gonna go in the other room we're gonna give you three minutes okay three minutes notice head start to just wipe that shit clean. Okay? And Rudy will say, I appreciate that. I really appreciate that because my daughter doesn't need to know what I was saying. I guess it's just,

I think if you looked at Rudy Giuliani, if you look at Rudy Giuliani, it fucking sucks his ass. If you look at Rudy Giuliani's computer, I think what he jerks off to is just pictures of Donald Trump. It would just be different pics of Donald Trump's hair blowing in the wind. he's like yeah yeah he probably sweats a lot when he fucks rudy giuliani

rudy giuliani uh tough mayor so arizona has banned abortion for genetic disorders now let's get this right what's exactly the law? This is what's going on now, which is so crazy, is that people are fleeing states and relocating to other states, not for jobs because there aren't many left, but for like principles and political reasons. You run into someone in Texas, you go, what are you doing here? And they're like, I'm escaping taxes from New York. You go to New Hampshire and you're like, what are you doing here?

They're like, I wanted to get rid of my malformed baby and I couldn't in Arizona. So I had to move here to kill this baby. I mean, there's certain states laws popping up everywhere. You'll meet somebody in Wyoming. They'll be like, what are you doing here? It's like, I just wanted to vote without having to have my asshole check for drugs in Georgia. So to be able to participate in the democracy, I had to relocate. As we've become so politically divided, as I've mentioned, because the fringes have taken over the conversation for both parties, especially the left. It's been hijacked by the crazy woke and far left, obviously, that now the states have become almost like countries and their laws are getting so different. Like pretty soon, one of these states is going to just be like, their currency is going to be Bitcoin. And the next thing you know, they're going to be like, why are we part of this economy? We have our own currency. Like we're headed closer and closer to becoming more like in the EU than we are the United States

of America because our culture is so different. You got people on the coast going, there's 157 genders and trans women are women. And then you got other people going like, I respect the rights of all trans women, but they're not women. They're trans women. Otherwise, why are you calling them trans women? If you're saying gender is different from sex, why are you bothering to change your sex? And then you got other people going like, shut up, and then you got other people going like shut up shut up you're going like hey biology shut the fuck up turf okay jk cock and fallen rollins is a bitch jk fucking rollins is hitler shut your fucking mouth you bitch don't eat meat you don't fucking care about cows that get feelings. And then other people are going like, fucking I don't wear no face diaper, motherfucker.

So really people are relocating based on state laws that are popping up. Pretty soon it's gonna be foul. There's gonna be like, pretty soon Arizona is probably gonna have a law where to go anywhere, you gotta show that you're a citizen. I mean, it's going to be foul. There's going to be like, pretty soon Arizona is probably going to have a law where to go anywhere, you got to show that you're a citizen. I mean, it's going to get nasty. And because these states,

everyone's losing faith in the federal government because they're not talking about specifics and how they're going to stimulate the economy. They're just taxing everybody and giving speeches about third gender bathrooms, which concerns about, gender bathrooms, you know, which concerns about, you know, no disrespect,

but it concerns about 0.007% of the population that seems to be dominating. It's the economy, stupid. How are you going to get people money? The only one talking about that is fucking the Chinese Santa. Andrew Yang is saying, I'm going to hand out money.

Let's vote for him and see what happens. At least he's not talking about transgender bathrooms for 45 fucking minutes. By the way, people say that I look like if Shrek came to life and lost a couple pounds. You don't see it or no? I don't see it. No, Jesse thinks I'm almost Stamos. Like the smartest kid in special ed.

There you go. Nate Bargatze used to look like the handsomest kid with down syndrome you ever seen when he had that haircut that went down that's what i used to say about him very funny comedian one of the funniest nate bargatze he's selling out he doesn't need the promotion um guys uh my uh episode of tiger belly with bobby leaves. Had a great time. Segura and Christina P. Your mama's house is up. Whatchamacallit. Whiskey Gingers should be dropping.

Should be out by now with the great Chito Santino. Go check out Jeremiah Watkins. We had a great time doing a lot of character pieces. Adam Ray, I did. I'm a little podcast whore because it's an arms race. Also, obviously, Lex Friedman, Tim Dillon's episode and his Patreon episode. We did two. And if you haven't listened to my Joe Rogan, go listen to that.

Watch my special. Tell your friends about my special. It's still up there. I'm also selling it to a production company that's going to get it on amazon um because it's underappreciated it's one of the best specials ever done so i don't know what's going on maybe it's because people like to eat shit okay my special is not fucking chipotle my special is fucking cheesecake factory so um as we uh while we wait for this um as we wait for this body cam footage to drop out of north carolina who's excited to see this movie are you guys excited to see the movie of the andrew

brown jr murder um the autopsy that was held privately said that he was shot four times in the arm and then there was a shot in the back of the head so north carolina um is bracing for riots as we are waiting for the body cam footage to drop son um this is one of the most highly anticipated movies since avengers i mean america is really in a sad state the funny thing Tim Dillon said this to me he goes the crazy thing is I think the only thing keeping us together was Donald Trump things are worse now because at least everyone was focused on Donald Trump whether you loved him or you hated and everyone either loved him or hated him um he gave us something to focus on he united people in hate and love now it's being exposed now we're being exposed for how splintered and fractured and how much of a third world country

we're becoming i mean when texas gets fucking texas can't function when it snows and there's people without power for like weeks or was it days that people must think I do cocaine. Cause I have allergies. I don't do cocaine. I never have. Does anyone have any more cocaine? And then,

and then things like this, where we're on, I mean, these things are not going to quit. We need some sort of police reform and hopefully people start coming together and stop focusing so much on the race of the people. You know who I feel really bad for in unarmed police shootings? Hispanics and others. Nobody on the right or left gives a shit about those statistics. Everyone's just arguing about what percentage gets killed more. And oh, the right goes, oh, they kill more white people what about hispanics who by my measurement are it depends because hispanics

can be black or they can be white okay if you're uh hispanic and you look like um who's the uh a raul's chapman you're i would say you're black right like? Like a lot of Dominicans, even though they're Hispanic, I say that he's black. But if you look like Canelo, you're a donk, okay? That's the Giannis Pappas test, okay? That's why I want Sean King to grow out his hair. And if it moves when the wind blows, okay, and you could play a role in the musical Grease with me, then you're not black. Greece with me, then you're not black. So that's just shows you how much the media keeps pumping the killings of unarmed people who are either black first, white second. You don't hear anything about Hispanic killings. Hispanic killings are more than black killings, right? And a little less than white killings. And then there's others.

There's a bunch who are others. I don't know. Some Hawaiian dude gets killed. I mean, what's an other? What is an other? They can't figure out what he is? Nobody cares about these others getting killed. There's no marches saying others' lives matter.

No, but why wouldn't they say South Asian? What's others? Are they killing so few indian kids because they just don't shoot up tech companies and doctor's offices or 7-elevens but dude others lives matters i would you know nobody's talking about these others god this podcast is good we're rolling it's called good content We're rolling. It's called Good Content. You know what Good Content's called? Good Yontent. This is Yontent I'm giving you.

Patreon.com slash Yanni Longdays. Isn't it funny how things come, this is basically what I used to do at Bar Four. Things come full circle. Patreon.com slash Yanni Longdays for the additional episode every Wednesday. $5 DVD. Cost you $5. Okay, so if you ever sat in a Blimpies and bought a Jackie Chan movie that was videotaped in a movie theater

for $5, you can afford four bonus episodes a month, four additional hours of YonTent for $5 a month, cuz. Yeah, cuz, would you pay $5? How much is $5? What can you get for $5 a month, cuz. Yeah. Cuz, would you pay $5? How much is $5? What can you get for $5, Drew, in Jersey? A hot dog? A hair job? What can you get for $5? And you're basically buying me a slice of the Coke.

A footlong. You can get basically. Subway footlong. A subway footlong, Drew. Drew underscore films on Instagram? Yes, sir. And go watch the other episode. I plugged it hard.

But yo, what were you thinking, my guy? But as soon as we get big enough, we'll probably drew away from catching pedophiles. I'm sure. I'm sure. It's just a hobby. No, it's good. It's good.

It's good work you're doing out there and you're protecting Jersey City from predators. I tell girls I'm a vigilante. You are a vigilante. You are a vigilante you are a vigilante and jesse scaturo all one word um because you are you what are we going to sell because we got to sell your art why don't we sell the baby socks he's for five what if i sold the history hyenas tile sign for thirty thousand dollars the history hyena sign is on sale right now for 30k with the tim dillon episode that'll cost you one million dollars and if you want to buy a baby socrates original statue

fifteen thousand dollars why did i get in fucking karate kid um so patreon.com slash yanni long days go join to access an additional episode. If you watch on Sunday or Monday and you're like, yo, I need some more yon tent, son. Family, cuz, I need some more yon tent. Boom. Wednesdays, another episode drops to get you through the week. A little heroin squeeze.

I love you guys. Stay Greek and I'll see you next week. Now let's read some fucking new Patreon names. All right, guys, as always, I'm gonna read the Patreon names. The newest members of the Patreon just wanna welcome you. You're now a long hauler.

You're in it for the long haul, but no COVID symptoms, only here for the YonTen. So here we go. First, but not least, we got Kirk. Welcome. DW Young. What are you gonna least, we got Kirk. Welcome. D.W. Young. What, are you going to write a poem? We get it.

Dr. Simon's Abortion Clinic in Pizzeria. No fetus can beat us. Your loss is our sauce. I think that might be my new favorite of all time, including hyenas. I'll read it again. What do you guys feel about that? Dr. Simon's abortion clinic in pizzeria. So right there, I'm going, you got me. And I thought it was going to go bad, but then his slogan is, no fetus can beat us. Your loss is our sauce. It's horrible, but it's very funny. Hall of Fame. Welcome, Dr. Simon, and I'm a fan

of your work. Love that Pete's. Zag it rated. Andrew Warren, welcome. Here for the yontent. Kenan Pop-Tarts. See, I like a good chicken figure like that. You call yourself Kenan Pop-Tarts. I like it. And Kenan, what's up? You know what yeah i mean there's no white kid named keenan now you could be a white name named nigel you could be a white dude named nigel because of british shit but you will never find a white keenan this is a black kid right there and then we got little little pebbles b benjamin adam g welcome B. Benjamin, Adam G. Welcome. Chase Red Baron. Oscar Booman, star. Eli Snyder. Welcome to the tribe, Eli. Then we got Stuart Jenkins.

Ya hurt. Garlic Toothpaste. Welcome. Shakar Singh. Welcome, Dr. Singh. Then we got Jason David. Some dumb bish. That's a goodie. She spelt it some dumb bish. So welcome, girl. Jeremy Lachance. Jeremy Lachance. Sounds like a bad guy in an 80s movie.

Then I am a Brazilian kid. My cousin can be Ronaldo or Francis Ngannou. or Francis Ngannou. Then next we have Karate It, part two, The Revenge of Yanni's Tongue, Almost Starting Yannis Pappas. So you meant to say Almost Starting Yannis Pappas. That's from Tiger Belly episode. That was a blast.

My Tiger Belly episode with Bobby's also up. Danny, welcome. Maverick, welcome. Sydney McGlynn, Crabtree, welcome. Yanni procreated his way into the Greek culture because Papu is pushing up olive trees, Esposito. Good one. I'd say he's second in the race behind my favorite pizzeria. Then we got Adam Cristolini.

Oh, Cristolini, his name. So Adam means his mom's a jew he's he's like you cuz half jew half italian adam cristallini how you doing cristallini cement calling then we got uh titty milk spelt t-i-d-d-i-e so titty milk then uh sarah anderson and that's it jess you go to page one oh page one um these are goodies new members of the patreon at patreon.com slash yanni long days obviously do a funny name make it fun then we got uh vito pipelli vito pipelli vito pipelli i mean we got some hardcore sauce monkeys then we we got David Welcome,

Jeff the Greek, who should be named Malik Williams. Very good. Then we got Ben Sago, Gio Pavlov, Timothy Schrader, first Russian kid, Pavlov. Then we got Danny Pena. Then we got Tanner. Then we got Old McTronald. Then we got Michael Welcome, James Smith Stewart. Then we got Dink Grabber.

Then we got Bill. Then we have Salvadorian Swedish Fish that gets consent when I pitch a tent. Then we got Tree Meister. Tree Meister. Then we got Veronica. Ooh oh this girl makes sure this girl has to have the sauce really nice with the garlic sliced really thin veronica capoletti did you go to edward r morrow and did i finger pop you outside saint saviors and then we got the underscore jews then we have jr hill callum lindsey uh then we have the canadian

sauce monkey then father b passed on me so now i have self-esteem issues then we have a radical anti-fundamentalist then we have ivan i've always been a five foot 10 squeak piece, but saying I'm six foot Wayne. Very good. Then we got, I like that one. Then we got Eiffel Towered by Yanni Longdays and Chrissy Chaos. That's what, you know, that's a good place to be. Then we got Mano Namin Ginobili.

Very funny. Then we got Walker Curtis. Gotta be a black kid. Yeah, man, y'all hurt. And then we got Spencer Bag curtis gotta be a black kid yeah me y'all hurt and then we got spencer bagley unfortunately in high school they pronounced it fagley i'll be coming with the heat this list and now we got colin i may be a greasy heterosexual potato monkey but make no mistake i'd let aoc peg me anthony And then we got, I came through Yanni's back door in a different way. Okay, I left the key for you. Then we got Elliot Vega, Adam, welcome.

Birdo in the streets, Frank in the sheets, big toe for a piece, Briseño. Then we got Kelsey. And then we have a fictitious non-womanizing Dominican kid. I mean, these are great. That one got Jesse good. Then we got AR, my eyes are close together too but i'm not a wikipedia slut like you brian then we got brendan the big red bush brown

then we got michael billis akash the 69th flagrant then we got brooks and eric b and rock him fresh and Rakim. Fresh young dude, aka Proud Boys, find your bleach. Then we got Tara. Welcome, Tara. Then we got Martin Burke, Sam Parsons, Mark Verduchu, Duncan McCalla,

Zach Rojas, Trent, welcome. Michael Kaufman, thank you. Chet Hanks, left nut. Chet Hanks, left nut nut is last but not least. Thank you guys for joining patreon.com slash yannilongdays, all one word, join. And we're also brought to you because, you know, Yanni Longdays always supports small business sponsors.

There's five slots. They're all filled. If one drops off, get in there. I will always do this to support small business because y'all deserve it. It works out. I mean, you're robbing me basically for these prices and Jesse hates it. But what can you do?

I'm a man of the people. Am I not the prince of the people? I can't wait till I become popular so I can murder homeless people. Because that's what happens with power. People just lose it. We're brought to you as always by Max, Mr. Good Guy Long. This guy fucking actually got a client already from here.

Good Guy's Refrigeration. You know what the deal is. He's got two locations. One in Palm Beach. So if you happen to be a member of the tribe and your fridge isn't working, or if you're Airbnb-ing from somebody who's a member of the tribe, okay, at Elizabeth Taylor's old house in Palm Beach, get your fucking refrigerator fixed

with the one and only Max, Mr. Good Guy Long, Good Guy Refrigeration. Go to goodguyrefrigeration.com. The guy works out of his truck. He'll come right to your house and crack open and clean out any fucking problem you have over there. And we are brought to you by one of my favorite restaurants.

No bullshit. I'm happy when this guy came to us and said, cuz, let me get in there. And you know he said, cuz, let me get in there. Cuz his name is Joseph DeMonte. He said, ma, let me borrow a little money. I'm going to open a fucking spot. I'm going to open a fat fucking spot. I haven't been paying rent for years because I've been living in your basement.

It's going to be called fucking Blue Agave. So Blue Agave on 3rd Avenue in Bay Ridge, which I still am part of the time. I basically live in Bay Ridge still. I'm here. I'm back and forth between here and New Hampshire or wherever the fuck you think I live. And so Blue Agave is my spot. I will be going there this summer with my wife and my baby dog. And I've been there a million times, sat out in the patio. And if you don't think I go there and get a fucking mojito and some quesadillas, you got another thing coming. A guy like Joseph,

Joseph DeMonte, he knows food. So go, Blue Agave, follow them on the Instagram, Blue Agave. Tell them Long Day Senya. And when you show up there, Joseph, you better be in there. Joe, be in there to fucking receive my fans

into your fucking establishment give them a fucking one free fucking mojito on the house you didn't tell me that but I'm saying they expect one free mojito on the house and we are brought to you again by Jared Z from the stink box Tallahassee looking for that Harry Yon EP to make me a cuzzy I always forget the cuzzy part cuz I love this guy's All right. This is an ex-Catholic kid. He's a good kid. He's now a born again Christian. So his mother says he's handsome. So if you are a Christian, you want to support a born againy. What do you call those for sure? Born againies? No, he says a Jew with no fumes and bad back, but my ex-Catholic now born again

mother. Oh, he's a Jew. So good Jewish kid. His ex-Catholic now born again mother oh he's a jew um so good jewish kid um his ex-catholic now born again mother says he's handsome so his mother's the one who's switching religions she's a free agent what a signing for the born again christians that they scored her an ex-catholic fucking that makes him happy we talked about born again cath on boarding and Christians on this episode, guys, you know what it is, exclusive auto shipping.com, okay, they're based in Tallahassee, Florida, brother, and they're soon to be in San Antonio, Texas, so this guy's picking real top of the line cities to do his business out of, but you know what it is, they will move your car, people are moving now, they're moving out of states um i i assume they do those two cities um so if you're moving what is it to those cities or from those cities i don't

know hit them up exclusive auto shipping.com tallahassee florida san antonio texas hit them up um i i assume they'll move your fucking car no matter where you live i don't know i don't know how that works but they will move your shit if you're moving and you need your car moved call my boy jared he's a good jewish kid with a born-again mom and we're brought to you um by this good kid rob's mental uh rob's mental playground so it's uh rob's mental playground dot com he actually sold a painting already to a Long Days fan. So go check out his art at robsmentalplayground.com. And you can follow Rob on Instagram or all your favorite social media platforms.

Das was the dollars. So robsmentalplayground.com. Yes!