Yannis Pappas Hour - The Bully & The Bish | Free Patreon Episode

Episode Date: June 3, 2022

Extra Longday episode. These episodes are available every week https://www.patreon.com/yannilongdaysJoin for 5 dollars a month and support Yanni. We appreciate your support so much. Keep Yanni wild! Yanni details how vixens like Amber Heard operate and how they pick their marks like Johnny Depp. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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That is 99 cents an episode. What a great deal. We appreciate and depend on your support. So please go join patreon.com slash yannilongdays and become a member of the Fediverse for great episodes like the one you're about to watch. up in the neighborhood and the news online going on and on what's lying wrong and there's something up now here comes a great kid you know you can trust from the truth to the news and cameras to the fake politics and the propaganda get his kids screwed in got a lot to say oh shit

it's about to be a long day it's a long day it's a long day welcome to your extra long day everybody. It's me and Koritsaki Mou Ado. Little koukla. This is koukla, the dog koukla. So, I'm Yiannis and this is the Greek podcast called Yiannis Paposymno Crete where there is honey missing from the store on Panathio Lane. What happened is the German tourists stole the honey from the outside store. Next up also we have a situation with stray cats, too many stray cats. Also what's going to happen for tourist season this year when people from the European Union come to Greece. Welcome to Greece.

Very happy country of 5 million people who started civilization. Welcome to Greece. This is Greek podcast. That's not how they go. They go, this is Greek podcast. We're the communists. We have to take over this country. They still have like very radical politics

in these countries. Communists, right wing. They're going at each other hard. Guess who also has that? We do. We do that as well. People get fired up. They get fired up.

They make things happen. The women's soccer team has finally got their equal pay with the men. I don't know what that means. I don't know what the arguments for or against it were at all. But I do know that Megan Repanipi

can now truly be the guy in her lesbian relationship she's got equal pay with the guy because she's dating i believe sue bird who's one of the best basketball players uh in american history since it's a greek podcast we say history history she's one of the best and megan repentapoo megan rapanew um was a very good soccer player um you know made herself into a star i think in the ways that dennis rodman made himself to a star very brilliant you know when the environment the marketing environment is going scoring scoring scoring scoring we love Jordan we love Bird we love Magic we love Charles Barkley we like these guys who put up 20 points a game Dennis Rodman who was probably the best rebounder of all time I think definitely you can say he's the best rebounder of all time at that time he said what

am I going to do? I'm not getting my due because I'm just a hardworking, blue-nosed, blue-collar basketball player that's very important to winning, but it's not sexy for marketing. So what am I going to do? I'm going to dress like a woman. I'm going to dye my hair fucking red, purple, whatever it is, act eccentric, bang Carmen Electra, and boom, next thing you know, big marketing dollars, baby, big star, Regan Panabacu, Megan Panapu, Megan, how do you pronounce her name, Megan Panapu did the same thing, I think she was a good soccer player, I don't think she

was the best, she was definitely good, but she dyes her hair purple, and she stood out, and the way you stand out now is not by causing havoc and partying and being like an eccentric personality. You become an activist, which is like the new I'm wild. So it worked, though, because she truly is an activist. So now they're getting equal pay. The respective unions will receive 90% of the FIFA bonuses paid in the 2022-23 World Cup and 80% of the boring.

These are tough conversations, but at the end of the day, it's the right thing to do, Zimmerman said. It's something that the U.S. women's soccer team deserve. It's something they fought hard for. And to be honest, sometimes it does feel like we just kind of come alongside them and had been a little late. It's not easy to look back and think about this whole journey. Yeah, I mean, it was tough. It was tough to think about this women's

sports slavery that happened. It's tough to look back. It's really tough to look back and think about how the women didn't make as much money as the men. But now they are. And I think it's really tough to look back and think about how the women didn't make as much money as the men but now they are and i think it's a good thing because i don't every if someone can get more money they should get it whether it's fair or I take a very, very, very Malcolm X approach to getting more money. I'll even go further. I take a serial killer's approach to get more money. Whatever it takes, if you got to change someone to a chair and threaten them with murder, as long as you can get them to agree to the deal because right what is payment it's the same thing as what is art it's the amount a person is willing

to pay you for your work they're gonna go as low as they go there's no like set agreed upon fair it's all opinion it's subjective it's like saying you know this person had a good special when you watch it and you clearly see that it's dog shit but then you see other people going i like that and those people are usually women with smaller brains and less salaries let's be honest. Young women typically like shit. Okay? They like boy bands. They like reality television. They like Us Weekly.

They like gossip on the red carpet. And they can't get enough of hating Amber Heard. Amber Heard is the white Omarosa. She is the new hate that bitch. She's the new Hillary to Republicans and a lot of Democrats. She's the new Omarosa for middle America. We may be able to unite America in the women's hate of Amber Heard. Women are not united on abortion.

I think the majority, maybe over 50%, support a woman's rights to choose. But I tell you, 100% hate Amber Heard. If abortion was Amber Heard, it would be unanimous that Roe v. Wade would be upheld. Amber Heard is the most hated woman since who? She makes Hillary

seem like Chris Farley. Dude, I've been watching this trial. This bitch is gone, girl. I know I was hard on Johnny on the free episodes. Was I being a contrarian for views? Was I picking a fight, which is what we were taught at Fusion, in order to get clicks? Yes, I was.

I was a contrarian. I was pulling a Bill Burr. Let me take the opposite side. Let me tell you why Hitler was good. Ha, ha, ha. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. Let me tell you why a woman's work is the easiest work in the world. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. Because I knew it would rile you up. Because I knew it would rile you up. It would rile you up. But in reality, Amber Heard is a cunt. She's a fucking nut job. When they play some of these audio messages of her telling him to suck her dick and cackling.

And saying he's a washed up junkie. him to suck her dick and cackling and saying he's a washed up junkie and another audio of her kicking the bathroom door in banging the door into his head which she said she didn't do on purpose but then she did admit when she punched him in the face after that that was on purpose and he goes he says punch she goes i didn't punch i hit he goes don't tell me what a punch is you sound like a faggot johnny depp welcome to the patreon you sound like a faggot and that's why she's such a brilliant villain because she knew she knew and when i mean faggot i don't mean gay guy i mean faggot, I don't mean gay guy. I mean faggot.

Another meaning, it's like faggot has become a word. There's two N words. There's one with the A that has a different meaning. And then faggot doesn't refer to a gay guy. It refers to someone who's acting like a faggot. Which means someone who orders a salad. That doesn't mean you like dick. It means you're acting like a faggot.

It means someone who orders a salad. That doesn't mean you like dick. It means you're acting like a faggot. It means someone who says to their wife, don't tell me what it feels like to get punched. Okay, Johnny, what you should have done is fucking threw this girl into a ceiling fan. Patreon, baby. All these jokes are performed by professionals and for the intention of making you laugh i don't believe you should throw a woman into a ceiling fan it's just a funny

cartoonish type of visual that when someone's acting like a bully and a bitch and is obviously a narcissistic liar sociopath a social personality who is fucking James Franco. She fucking, on the day that they had their big blowout fight, was caught on elevator video going down, meeting James Franco in Johnny Depp's penthouse apartment that that motherfucker pays for. He was away doing some film, making the money, okay?

Making the money. Really? Like a man should. Franco slid in there? Oh, yeah. She cheated on Johnny with Franco. And he just slid right up? And Franco, he slid right in there

with his fucking slimy acting teacher cock. When James Franco shows up, bubba's, it's like the Grim Reaper for your relationship. He's fucking the leftovers. James Franco. James Franco. He's a scavenger. Yeah.

He's a scavenger. Hollywood. He's a scavenger. Hollywood sounds like a fun place. Yeah. James Franco is, you know, the reason why I kept repeating James Franco is I was trying to make a joke, which often happens to me, and I can't remember the name of the bird that does that. The bird? The dodo bird? No, the dodo bird. The dodo bird is funny when you call. So you're a dodo bird. Fucking dodo bird? No, the dodo bird. The dodo bird is funny when you call it.

You're a dodo bird. Fucking dodo bird. It means you're stupid. Because dodo birds apparently are fucking stupid. Why are dodo birds, why do they have the reputation of being stupid? Do they just fly into walls? What do they do, you fucking dodo bird? No, I was trying to think of a vulture.

Oh, there you go. Yes. Trying to think of a vulture. There you go. Yes. I was trying to say that James Franco is the vulture that feeds on the carcass of dying relationships. He will come in and he will fuck your leftovers. That's what James Franco does.

He fucks him. He doesn't eat him. He fucks your leftovers. Doesn't give a shit because he's James Franco. How could you not love James Franco, dude? I mean, he just cleans up. He's got a housekeeping cock. He comes in and he cleans up what's left.

You want your girl fucking James Franco because that's how you know you're supposed to end the relationship. That she's dirt that he's cleaning up. Amber Heard is dirt that gets cleaned up by his cock which is the swiffer in this analogy so yeah she james franco that there's a video of him in the elevator with her she goes down and meets him in the parking lot they get into the elevator right on the day that johnny and her had theout fight, she leans into his shoulder and then they get out onto the floor of Johnny Depp's penthouse and he fucked her on Johnny

Depp's Pirates of the Caribbean money bought bed, baby. And that's how it goes when you're dating a skittle. She's a skittle! To borrow the intonation from Bill Burr's podcast when he yells and he moves

the mic away oh burr burr i want to fight you burr one-on-one me versus you in an over 45-year-old match. I love Burr. Best comic of all time. Johnny is not the only partner you assaulted. Amber Heard loses her cool. Amber Heard loses her cool. Jeff's lawyer brings up 2009 arrest for slapping her girlfriend and sneaking James Franco into the penthouse after changing locks. She tried to change locks

from the house that he owns. Dude, the evidence is clear that she fucking hit this guy a lot. He might have pushed her, maybe shoved her back once in a while. I mean, how do you litigate this? She's definitely no victim, cuz.

When you listen to this audio, she's no victim. And then she goes into Aquaman and she gets to kiss Jason Momoa. I mean, hello. Here's the thing. These fucking liars get away from it for, they get away for a little while.

But there's an old expression from one of my favorite movies, one of the most underrated movies of all time that you've probably never even seen. Okay? And I don't know if you have any interest in it, but it's called True Colors with John Cusack and James Spader.

And it's a brilliant movie. And there's a line at the end where he goes, God help you when the people find out. And then he pauses and he goes, and the people always find out. And isn't that true? Even if you look back in history or whatever, how many people have truly gotten away with it?

You get away with something for a certain amount of time. Well, you would never know because they got away with it. Because they gotten away with it? You get away with something for a certain amount of time. Well, you would never know because they got away with it. Because they got away with it. They got away with it. Probably most people get away with it, right? There's a fair amount of people get away with it. Fair amount of people get away with it. I mean, but you know, Bernie Madoff didn't get away with it.

I mean, I bet you the spoils were good when they were good, but was it worth it when he hung himself in his own goddamn first class jail cell yeah that's a tough one yeah i mean guys i recommend the movie true colors john kusek and james spader it's about two friends one of which is like poorer and as by you know kind of lies and manipulates to work his way up and get into politics and james spader who's from a privileged background but he's honest and they they form a partnership and a friendship james spader helps him get elected and john kuzak fucks his wife and betrays him by doing corrupt illegal shit and throws him under the bus this these things happen to us in life best friends from law school right what i'm about to read you fucking move it oh sorry you fucking quack sack

i'm gonna give you some a little more info yeah but uh i was just reading the tagline their best friends they meet in law school it's a great movie and they people get away with it for a little while amber heard had a good thing going. She had a good plan. Give her respect for her plan. She's like, you know, by any means necessary, this bitch will fuck women, guys, whatever it is, to move up. She fucked a Spanish director. She fucked a woman who was like in Hollywood.

She's got a woman she's fucking now. This bitch will do anything. And that's what you need in that town, baby. Good people don't rise to the top. There's this expression that the cream rises to the top. That only happens in meritocracies like basketball and comedy. And comedy, it does eventually. You can promote all the garbage specials you want. You can do whatever you want. But eventually, the funniest people will be heard from because word of mouth will spread eventually because people you can't fake laughter or you can't fake quality you can't fake it eventually you get exposed this bitch had a good plan okay she had a good plan you have to have a plan in Hollywood. What makes Amber Heard good? Like when you go to Hollywood and you're a hot chick. Now, Amber Heard is one of the hottest

chicks I've ever laid eyes on. As we've said before, you can tell that her pussy tastes like honeydew melon. And that's just a fact. There was no way there's a fucking ounce of fumes on that blonde girl. Fake blonde girl. You can see the black roots there. She's just hot to trot. And her put... I would have ate her shit on the bed. I mean, look at her. She is gorgeous, dude.

She's just gorgeous. She's gorgeous in that Tanya Harding nasty kind of ruin my life type of way. Look at that. She's so alluring. There's something about her that's so alluring. She's got a perfect face. Can you imagine just her? Can you just imagine?

Can you imagine the power of that when Johnny Depp, like he was looking down and he's just, there's something special about her that is so sexy compared to the other women. And you know what that thing is? It's evil. I was just going to say that. Evil is hot.

You could kind of see that she's a scorpion. It's fucking hot. She's a scorpion. What's the Batman villain, the fucking one who puts the spell on you? Oh. Uma Thurman. Yeah, the Batman villain, the fucking one who puts the spell on you? Uma Thurman. Whatever that one was.

There's no hot chicks who come in and go, it's not hot to come in and go, hey, do you want to go work with retarded kids all day? Nobody wants to fuck. Is that hot? Is that hot? I'm asking you. Does that get your goat going? No. But that's what you want.

That's what you want. No, you want a girl In a Catholic school outfit Who's doing something Fucking naughty I mean but look at the results Look at Johnny It was worth it Was it worth it I mean if you If I sat Johnny down here

And I said Johnny And he went whoa I wasn't quite sure You know He talks like a real I'd be like Johnny Let's Johnny cut the ball let's talk man man and man tate to tate let's have a tate to tate get smarter head to head latin or some shit tate to tate head to head confrontation pun intended when you were getting hit when amber

heard was sucking her dick with her hair that smelled like the most beautiful shampoos you've ever heard. With a melon type of aroma emanating from her. Magical kiwi. And when she was slobbing on that thing with those beautiful hands and that body. That's what separated her from the pack, wasn't it? And the way she was able to play mind games with you and turn herself into like a heroin addict. The kid liked drugs.

Some of the hottest sex is with the worst relationships. They feel like a drug addiction. It's that push-pull thing that evil people know how to do. Love bombing. It's what narcissists do. They love bomb. So they come in, they make you feel like nobody has ever seen you that way. And like you're the greatest. They just know how to, they read you and they know where your vulnerabilities are. And then they give it all to you and then they take it away. Because someone who really loves

you can't take it away because it hurts too much they love you they're real people but the people who aren't they take it away because that wasn't their primary objective their primary objective was not to love you their primary objective was to take from you so that's where the art of the seduction comes in. I seduce you to take down your defenses so now you're vulnerable and I can get. And boy, did she get millions of dollars that she did not give to the ACLU. Okay?

We are donating all the proceeds from our Patreon to the ACLU in Hamburg. Jesse, let me ask you an honest question. Okay? We're on the Patreons. Let me ask you an honest question. Okay, we're on the Patreons. Let me ask you an honest question. How good do you think that pussy is that Elon Musk made a donation in her name to the ACLU? Cleaning up her mess,

because she claimed in the press that she donated all the money from her settlement with Johnny Depp to battered women, and she became like a spokesperson in exchange. And I love how these things are supposedly not, you know, are supposed to be so pure. The ACLU decided to make her an ambassador for whatever,

for, for whatever, for whatever. They basically called her and said, what title do you want for Johnny Depp's money? Give us Johnny Depp's money. We're not going to ask questions. The ACLU wasn't interested in whether her accusations were real or not.

You know? Look, I'm someone who's done something like this. Okay? When I got my friend's bike stolen in Crown Heights, I pretended like I punched myself in the face because I felt so guilty. I wanted him to think I put up a fight for his bike, and I didn't. Right. I just got it stolen. She punched herself in the face and went and got a restraining order.

Okay? She works hard for the money. So hard for it, honey. Do you think that was playing in her head when she was punching her face? She works hard for the money, but you better not treat her right. When Amber Heard clocks in, she punches herself in the face. Time to go to work. Bang.

Yeah, she's a method actor. She's a method actor, dog. But let me ask you a serious question. I love her Twitter bio here. Actor and activist, semi-professional disruptor, ice cream advocate, and shameless teacup Yorkieie lover so disarming so disarming and then you listen to the fucking audio she's cackling like a witch telling him to suck her dick calling him a washed up fucking old man it's hilarious she's abusing him and he's taking going don't tell me what it's like to be punched

i should have three should have thrown her into a ceiling fan i mean his biggest mistake was marrying her that's the problem that's my point though what separates and let's just be cruel for a second and be honest amber heard is not meryl streep. But his resume must be insane. With the puss puss? Yeah. Yeah, but he's one of those kind of like, what do you got to say? He's one of those like, do you know poetry? He's one of those annoying

fucks. Anyone who dates Winona Ryder, who also was a kleptomaniac, remember she was stealing? You like a bad girl, Johnny. Do you remember Winona was stealing clothes? How funny was that? She's so dead inside and been famous for so long in order to get a rush, she went and stole clothes. I think the better question, is there any normal people in Hollywood? No, you're broken. There's a hole in you if you want to act. Comedians have a redeemable hole in us. It's redeemable. It's like a humble hole.

You know, like some of us. There's a lot of ones who are actors, who have more of an actor personality, who become comedians as kind of a grift to perform and get in. But the good comedians, there's some bad people who are comedians I've met. And when I mean bad, I mean they're not murdering people they're just like

know what you're dealing with it's like DMX said one of the you know you know what I'm saying you want to hear one of the deepest shits

you've ever heard Jesse Scatoro from DMX and let yeah it's from DMX rest in peace RIP you gotta do

whenever you mention DMX's name you gotta do a couple of fucking dog barks afterwards cause that is I think it's actually on his birth mention DMX's name, you got to do a couple of fucking dog barks afterwards. Because that is, I think it's actually on his birth certificate. DMX, boo, boo, boo. But before I get into this, I was going to ask you this quick question.

She's not Meryl Streep. She's not Johnny Depp. Johnny Depp's an amazing actor. Yeah, he's great. He's great. Now, what separates Amber Heard from all the other girls? You go to to la they're everywhere what separates it evil evil makes people interesting there's a reason why we like

mob movies and we don't like movies about social workers it's boring we like evil we respect the cunning and the premeditation that it takes there's a reason othello yago the manipulative yago is like a fucking that's the reason why we go to horror movies nobody likes normal people so let me get this straight you're saying that he he sensed her evil and was seduced by it yeah because it's a she used her puss puss well. Well, that, yeah. But why did he marry her? Because he could get puss-puss any night of the week. Because it's not real. It's alluring.

And he likes drugs. He likes, you know, he's one of those, you know. He wanted to get closer to it. Yeah, he wants to hear. People like that, especially when you have big egos, you want everything. You know, like you're not, Johnny Depp isn't looking forward to getting old.

These people, they fucking put their faces, they hold on and claw. Their lives are so good. They're used to so good. They're used to so much attention. They don't live in the real world. They can't identify these people, you know, because it's all ego. You know, she's going talking whatever poetry bullshit she seduced him with that she pretended like she fucking cared about because at the beginning he's going like she liked literature

who the fuck you're johnny depp you're really checking what books a bitch reads you know you don't spare me what your fucking rings on get some hot puss puss line them up and knock them down like fucking bowling pins that's why you got to respect Leonardo DiCaprio. He's not asking girls what books they read. He's saying, is your age bracket 19 to 28? Are you fucking legal and will you sign this NDA? I'm not marrying you because I'm not stupid. I'm a man and I like to fuck.

I'm not an idiot who's going to get swindled by some fucking sweet-ass puss-puss for some actress who's trying to make it. They're all maniacs. You don't see a Leonardo DiCaprio dating actresses. Don't fact-check me on that. You see him dating dumb fucking models who signed NDAs. One night he famously went back to his apartment with like 18 models. The kid makes you sign paperwork. If you're not, if you're famous like Johnny Depp and you're not making a bitch sign paperwork,

that's the part I blame him. Yeah. You know, because he's one of those like, what books did you read? Look, ooh, let's say I had an intellectual, you're not an intellect, Johnny. Okay, I know you, you know, you read scripts and maybe you know a couple of big words. You're an actor. You pretend to be other people. Okay?

You're a kid from Kentucky with a nice looking face with some acting chops. Okay? So is she. I hate to break your bubble. There is no intellectual conversation happening there. Okay, but this is what DMX says. To answer your question, I don't quite know what I'm saying. I'm just trying

to be funny and outrageous. Trust the snake? Here you go. Always trust everyone to be themselves, but trust in the fact that you can see them well. It takes too much energy to not trust someone you mean it takes too much energy you're only gonna say two steps ahead of him whatever trust him to beat him all right to beat themselves trust the snake to bite you

but know that when you see them do you get what he's saying how many eight balls you think that was i don't know but that was deep You didn't see how deep that was? Yeah, but the problem here is he didn't see her as a snake. Well, that's his problem. That's his problem. DMX is basically saying, you know, not trusting people takes too much energy. You got to always be two steps ahead. It's a headache.

It's not worth it. Trust people to be themselves, meaning you have to trust yourself to be able to identify them. who be themselves, meaning you have to trust yourself to be able to identify them. If you're with a snake, it's like that old adage of like the fucking frog that let the scorpion across and then the scorpion stings. It goes, why did you do that? It goes, because I'm a scorpion, dummy. But I think that's what makes these people so good. They don't present as a snake.

Well, if you can't see that, well, that's the thing. Because sex and sexuality takes in love or whatever that is, which is really just, you know, love is love is just lust mixed in there. It's not you know, it's like you want to fuck something really bad when you're really attracted. You know, love is an action that that's how you protect yourself from this shit. What's this person doing? Like, but maybe I'm being too hard on Johnny, right? He was vulnerable. She got in there.

What's your take on this? First of all, he was on heroin, right? He was vulnerable. She got in there. What's your take on this, Bubba? First of all, he was on heroin, right? Is your audio good? Yeah. As good as it always is. All right. So you can hear either Jesse's here or he's in a forest.

Or he's in another. Yeah, Jesse's either here or in a forest. We got top of the line audio gear. If you're listening, just enjoy it. This is the Rick Glass glassman podcast he's in a forest snap and there he is that kid's pretty creative he's very creative and pretty brilliant is i think his podcast is the most original one out yeah go listen to the episode i just did with him uh people are saying it's the best one he's ever done i mean how many times am i going to go on a podcast and they're going to say it's the best episode they ever had before people just

stop saying i'm underrated and just fucking say i'm undeniable i mean let's just be honest okay my special mom love was out right now it's like watching a mexican boxer fucking bang in the middle of the ring i beat that fucking crowd up you can hear the pops of the leather i don't know what more i gotta do to prove to you that i am the robo cheese man i mean i go on tiger belly bobby says it's the best episode they've ever had or one of the best they've ever had. I go on The Fighter and the Kid post, Brian Callen being called a rapist, and everyone's saying Guest of the Year or whatever.

I'm fucking as good as all the best ones they've had. I go on fucking Rick Glassman's. It's the fucking best. One of the best he's ever had. I mean, my first Rogan. Rogan tells me it's one of the best. I mean, what do we got to do here? I think you're talking to the wrong camera.

It's this one. That's maybe the problem. And I'm also? I think you're talking to the wrong camera. It's this one. That's maybe the problem. And I'm also, I'm just having a good time bragging. It's fun sometimes to brag. I want to know what your take is because you never get seduced. You must have been seduced in the past by one. You learned your lesson and then you stayed away. Yeah.

Well, listen, I'm not getting seduced. Nobody's looking for me. I don't have these problems these are tough these are problems these are tough yeah these are johnny depp problems these aren't jesse's katoro problems okay but but you can see chicks yeah but none of them are trying to seduce me true so if they were you might you might fall for in a second i might know what i just it anyway. Oh my God. I love this art. So let's talk about French Impressionist art from the 17th century.

You know this bitch Googled it the night before when Johnny was like, let's talk about literature. Amber, can we talk about literature? And she's like, oh my God, I love Chaucer. Chaucer's Canterbury Tales. And then she just read something. She's like a Melania Trump.

First of all, how funny is it that Melania Trump read Michelle Obama's speech? I mean, that's one of the funniest things. We became so desensitized during the Trump administration to something that would otherwise have just canceled. That's where the cancel cult went too far because people got so sick of cancel culture that Trump was able to skirt on all that stuff.

If they hadn't gone too far, that might have ended them there, that his wife read Michelle Obama's speech. I mean, do we even remember that one? That's his secret sauce, Trump, is that he does so much wild, inappropriate shit, you don't know what to put your finger on. Yeah. That and he's shameless.

You can't embarrass the guy. You can't embarrass a shameless person, which is like cancel culture kryptonite. You will never hear an apology. But he was only able to gain support in that shamelessness because people were so sick. He was like standing up to the cancer cult. It was refreshing.

Finally, someone came along. Finally, someone was just going, fuck you. So you, you're saying you can't blame the guy. My nose itches. I don't do coke. It's like allergies or something.

I don't know what it is. You're saying you can't blame the guy. Yeah, I mean, he's a troubled guy. He's on heroin. And she is a smoke show. She's a smoke show. I mean, yeah, I'm falling for her the first night. Do you think there's any chance that he beat her and this is just he's playing the victim?

Well, first of all, I haven't followed one second of this guy. Are you telling me you haven't caught up? You're not caught up on what's going on in Hollywood's 9-11? The only thing that piqued my interest was the shit in the bed, and once I heard that story, I was out. Well, here's what it is. The Will Smith smack was the 9-11 of Hollywood, okay? The Amber Heard Johnny Depp saga, that's more like Benghazi.

This is Hollywood's Benghazi, okay? This benghazi this is hollywood's benghazi okay this is benghazi i had no idea this was happening i know unless you stay aren't you glad you produced this podcast so you can be filled with the world's garbage um yeah so i think everyone hates her now. It looks real bad. I think the cows have come home to roost. The only way that she's getting out of this without Johnny Depp winning this law, no matter what happens, Johnny Depp's got his reputation back because I've been watching it.

She looks horrible on the stand. She's being contradicted. Her veracity's been proven to be not strong um she's been caught in some lies and some stuff you're going like come on when she's trying to rationalize it you're going come on now we hear the tape what you said we see the facts of what you said the only way it's the jury man if this was a trial by and why is it still just a jury if they're televising it shouldn't people shouldn't the whole population vote on it should be like american idol yeah should be like american idol gets to vote yeah dude i mean that's the next entertainment coming too it's like a

mixture of court tv and american idol where we get to vote and then we get to all throw amber herd into a ceiling fan. But. So wait, what are the stakes? She's suing him. She's countersuing for 100 mil. He's suing her for 50 mil. So he's suing her for 50 mil and lost revenue from his Disney movies or whatever. Right, right, right.

And the only way she gets off is there's men on that jury. That's it. The only way she gets off is the same way Johnny Depp got fucked. It's just the allure, you know, of her. There's something about her you just want to. And she's like kind of like she's strong. I respect women like that who climb up. Where's she from?

Let's look at her background. Austin, Texas. She's from Austin. Austin was always weird, a weird place. Who are her parents? Let's think a little bit about Amber Heard's background. Let me just say this. It looks like the media is breaking her way.

Look at these headlines. Why it's time to believe Amber Heard. Amber Heard's sister was terrified of a violent sibling and feared. I don't know what the rest of that says, but it seems like the media is starting to push behind Amber Heard, according to these headlines. Well, yeah, Vogue, Independent, Johnny Depp, joked about punching Amber Heard in the face.

Let's look at that one because I didn't. Which one? That one, yeah. No, that one, people, yeah. Let's look at what's going on. Johnny Joked About Punching Everyone In The Face On Wedding Day. Friend Testifies. Yeah.

Yeah. It's all. There's never any. Like the Johnny side has like evidence. Right. And then there's so many holes in her story about like the way she described that he punched her so many times that like she thought she had a broken nose and there was blood here. And she said Johnny Depp's security saw her with the blood.

She didn't notice it when she went to the bathroom. And Johnny Depp's attorney is going like, you didn't look in the mirror in the bathroom? She goes, no. Right. It's like, so what? You know. And then the security guard, the one security guard who saw her with the blood, he's dead. So you're going like. Very he's dead so you're going like

Johnny Depp always wears rings and then they show a picture of her the next day and you're going like that does not look she's on James Corden the next day it's lies there's no question it's lies but that's the thing now we live in a time where you can lie

people don't know what's true even if the evidence is there it's like some people how can you believe Amber Heard after looking at those pictures Like you can lie. People like don't know what's true. Even if the evidence is there, you know, it's like some people, how can you believe Amber Heard after looking at those pictures? Johnny Depp's wears rings on his fingers. You say he was repeatedly punching you in the face to the point where you felt like he had a broken nose. And then you went on James Corden the next day and there's pictures of you and your face looks perfect.

So I don't know, but let's see about the jokes about i want to see about the joke oh according to her friend yeah so it's yeah there's according to her friend of course yeah look how misleading it is like you only see that to the very end right you know when you're looking when you look at the headline it's different it's like according to amber heard's witness you're like well yeah that makes sense doesn't according to Amber Heard's witness, you're like, well, yeah, that makes sense, doesn't it? It's Amber Heard's witness. Oh, that's her sister. Oh, let's take a look at the one who, yeah, she just didn't have enough.

What can you do? That's the Brent Price. She didn't get the special sauce. Yeah. Can we look into her background though, just really quickly? I'm very interested to know what was the environment that brought up Amber Heard? I'm completely slandering her on here but you know what nothing compared to what women

are doing women hate her the majority of women i think it's pretty unanimous they hate her they think she's lying they don't buy it women are seeing through her bullshit uh yeah just go let's go to the wiki okay heard was born in austin tex, Texas to Patricia an internet researcher and David Clinton Heard who owned a small construction company she is a younger singer Whitney so she's solidly middle class

Heard's father trained horses in his free time and she grew up riding horses hunting fishing with him she's like a she's like a Texas rural like a texas rural girl she participated in beauty pageants oh boy parents are fucked and or and her although as an adult she said that she could no longer support the object objectification does this sound good you know that she ran it through the publicist in her own brain.

She was like, this sounds good. I can't support the objectification even though I did it and wanted to do it. Heard was raised as a Catholic. Oh, the hottest. The Catholic raising is almost worth it. The repression from the Catholic church is worth the enthusiasm that they have when they let loose, when they go on their rumsprinka.

Rumsprinka. The Catholic girl, like the hottest things I've had have been with Catholic girls, girls who've grown up Catholic. Yeah. Because there's just an extra naughty to that. Naughty is just hot. Naughty's hot.

She began identifying as an atheist at 16. Her best friend died in a car crash. You may want to look into the circumstances of that death. Amber. I'm totally slandering her. Said she no longer felt comfortable in conservative, God-fearing Texas. So I had to get out of there and go to Libtown. Dropped out of her Catholic high school

to pursue an acting career in Los Angeles. She eventually earned a diploma through a home study course. Intellectual. I'm not convinced that you wouldn't drop everything for her right now. Me? Yeah.

She walked in here right now. I'd give it all up. For Amber Heard? For that wild ride? Yeah. I'd give it all up. I Heard for that wild ride. I give it all up. I'm not a hundred percent convinced that you would. I'm not a hundred percent convinced either.

God damn it. That's horrible. It would be a tough, I'd walk away, but it would be a tough walk away. Dude, it's tough. You got a few pops in you.

Forget it. Oh, if I got a few belts in me, as the great Doug Bell says? Oh, man. She comes on the podcast. Yeah. If Jim can do it tomorrow, you want to do it tomorrow, you can't.

What time? I don't know. Because I think he's growing his hair and shit. Oh, yeah. Jim Norton. I can move some stuff around, but possibly. possibly all right let me give back to him yeah if i had a few belts in me it's rough dude it would be the hardest thing it would be the hardest thing but i would walk away there's no way i'm fucking wrecking what i got

the salute i'm telling you dude the solution to move to the woods the salute no the solution is vigorous and rigorous rigorous masturbation as you get older you just you look at it as an ally you know it's like it's funny too it's ironic because when you're younger i feel like you need porn more when you get older you don't need much. You just need, you know, like, and you just get it out, and it's done. You know what I mean? It's just done.

If my daughter's listening to this in 20 years, I'm just trying to make comedy. I'm sorry. I would never do that. I stayed with your mother. I'm still with her, obviously. It's tough, though. She doesn't look like this anymore, though.

Thank God. It's true, yeah. Thank God for the male population. This is about 10 years ago, maybe. Yeah, she still looks amazing, though. She's 36. I mean, in the court, she's obviously intentionally not getting made up because she was instructed not to look too. But isn't that intriguing that that would be the advice?

Like, don't look too hot? Like, isn't that interesting? that intriguing that that would be the advice like don't look too hot like isn't that interesting like what's that about like johnny depp's looking his best why can't she and she can't say that sexism because she's doing it nobody you know like well why why can't she look incredible because people are suspicious of like of how that can sort of manipulate you right is that the reason why she's not made up and looking like this? It's a role. She's acting.

So that's her wardrobe for this part. And what's the strategy behind that? So that she doesn't look like a seductress. So it's seductress. So she's almost admitting that there's such a thing as a seductress. And that that's what she's being cast as. Yeah, if she came in in some nightclub outfit or something like that,

I mean, forget it. Yeah, because... She's got to come in there looking with her business suit on, whatever the hell she's wearing. What I'm saying is that's an admission that that is a thing. That's a thing that happens. That's an admission that that's a thing that's a that's a thing that happens that's an admission that that's a thing that happens and that's admitting that there is this potential that she was a

seductress she came in she's gorgeous would she be with johnny depp if she didn't look like that would she be cast as aqua opposite aquaman if she didn't look like that? Would she be Cass' opposite Aquaman if she didn't look like that? I mean, who are we kidding? You know, they can't cast Cate Blanchett. Cate Blanchett's hot, but not this type of hot. Not a, like, seductress type of hot. This is like, this is what Hollywood likes, a cocaine type of hot. I call them Skittles.

It's like, it's not fucking, they're not Brussels sprouts with garlic on them. Okay. You got to really season Brussels sprouts. She's a Skittle. She's a Skittle. Amber heard is a Skittle. And,

um, that's what we like. Our Megan Fox is our, our, our trashy horse. I kid. I'm joking. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

I'm sorry. Unnoticed. Unnoticed for being a sexist. But that's basically what the court case is about. Is she a seductress or is she this wholesome girl who's on the stand

who was abused by this guy on the audio tape who's going, don't tell me what it feels like to be punched. Whose hand was split open because she threw a bottle at him. She kicked the door into his head.

All we have is her word. There's no evidence. This is the difference. There's no audio evidence that I know of. Maybe we can Google it. Don't hold my hand to the fire on that. There's no audio evidence,

no video evidence there's only hearsay from her witnesses and her that he hit her that's all but on the other side you hear her admitting to the fact that she hit him at the very least dude let me just be honest this is what i this is what i know is fact the very least, this was a mutually toxic relationship where they hit each other. She's not the victim here of domestic abuse. This is not a fucking Chris Brown situation where he pummeled the shit out of Rihanna. Ooh, those are bad. Remember that photo?

That photo was awful. Yeah, is there any, like, evidence? How about evidence that Johnny Depp hit Amber Heard? Put that in. Evidence? No, you put in the wrong thing. Evidence that Johnny Depp hit Amber Heard. Six most explicit pieces of evidence against Amber Heard.

Sex most explosive against Johnny Depp. Let's take a peek from Newsweek. Johnny Depp's tumultuous marriage to ex-wife Amber Heard. Okay. The proceed. It's in Fairfax County in Virginia. Okay. Keep going down. Let's in Fairfax County in Virginia. Okay. Keep going down.

Let's figure it out. Keep scrolling. I believe. One. Depp allegedly under the influence. Johnny Depp. Yeah. She took a lot of pictures of him passed out.

I don't know how that's evidence. The guy's passed out. So various photos were shared of pictures of him passed out. I don't know how that's evidence. The guy's passed out. So various photos were shared in court showing him passed out after allegedly binging on drugs and alcohol. That's not hitting her. During opening statements, spoke about Depp's crushing drugs. Okay, he admits the kid liked drugs and he liked alcohol. By the way, she did them too. So there's that.

So Newsweek is putting that as crushing evidence. That's number one. That's number one. Pictures of him passed out. Depp's text messages to Paul Bettany. Let's see what they say. I'm not sure we should burn Amber. No, he wrote, let's burn Amber.

Let's burn Amber. Okay, that's not evidence either. I'm not sure we should burn Amber. she's delightful company and pleasing on the eye we could of course do the english course of action and perform a drowning test thoughts you have a swimming pool okay that's not good but that could be tongue in cheek yeah blowing off some steam those are words and then de replied, let's drown her before we burn her. I will fucking burn her corpse afterwards to make sure she is dead. He's blowing off steam. He hates her. He didn't mean that literally. You can make the case he didn't mean that literally, which is most likely the case. I've written shit like that. My thoughts entirely. Let's be certain before we pronounce her a witch. They're having a good time.

When asked about the messages, let me see what he said. Heard explicit names like ugly, cunt, worthless hooker, and filthy whore. He's angry. Okay, when I write something, when I text something especially, I'm in a particularly impassioned place. It's a canvas. It's a painting. Depp said in court, having previously said it's a canvas, it's a painting. All right.

But that's not damning evidence that he hit her. No liquor bottle used in assault during his testimony. Heard was seen hesitating as she was shown a photo of bottle that she alleged dump. Hey, Depp had used during a fight. Amid images of broken glass shown during their confrontation, Depp and Heard made allegations against one another. Depp alleged that Heard threw a large bottle of vodka at him, resulting in injuries that included the severing of part of his fingertip.

However, Heard disputed this claim, saying that Depp cut his fingertip while intoxicated for three straight days. That doesn't sound true. She also alleged that Depp hit her, choked her, and sexually assaulted her during the fight in question. Again, it's all things she said. Now, the broken glass and his finger being caught, it's more likely that she threw it at him. Especially when you hear the audio of her fucking kicking in doors and slamming shit. But then you see the one video of him is like

slamming the counters and pouring the wine. But that's him being mad. Recall the time she believed Depp was going to kill her during a flight in 2015. She said Depp was chasing her, dragging her around the apartment by the hair.

We had an argument that was a shoving I was losing. We had an argument that was a shoving. Heard the lawyer presented photo claims to be pieces of hair on the floor of her apartment that Depp allegedly pulled out. They also showed a picture of Heard's scalp. Now, she's got a little something on the eye there. I don't know. She testified, and there is hair, so that could be evidence. She testified that the devil was challenging her

to get back up. After he hit her and shoved her down, after he stood back up, Hurd said, balled up his fist, leaned back, and head-butted me square in the nose. and head-butted me square in the nose. Okay, well, there's a picture. She was screaming,

I fucking hate you in that moment. I thought I was going to die. Okay, then there's the images of the drugs and alcohol. That's also not. Johnny Depp's lawyers are claiming this was staged because look at it. Three neat lines. There's a cigarette in this was staged because look at it. Three neat lines. There's a cigarette in the back with no ashes in it and like a glass and he's passed out somewhere.

So it does look a little staged. Answering the question of the applicator related to cocaine to get the cocaine up your nose. Okay, audio of Depp howling like an animal. During a testimony, during a fight at a private jet, Okay, audio of Depp howling like an animal. During her testimony, during a fight at a private jet, she testified that Depp began howling, throwing ice cubes and utensils at her

and called her an embarrassment. Heard also alleged that he slapped her in the face and later kicked her to the ground. This is all things she's saying. Heard then asked the flight attendant, go back up, flight attendant for an oxygen tank, continued to drink alcohol,

began howling like an animal and passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. She began recording him saying, Johnny, I knew you wouldn't remember what he had done. Audio played in court. Still no evidence. Yeah, I mean, the only thing is the photo. The photo.

But this, I mean, it's so wild. Yeah, that's the end of it. I mean, you've seen... Dude, if someone fucking kicked back and head-butted you in the nose, that is not what it would look like. Yeah, this is mild. And like the cut hair,

she could have done that herself. I mean, that's just a little piece of hair on the floor. It's funny she knew to take the pictures of it, too. I mean, they do do that. Battered women will document it. Yeah, yeah. So, okay, okay. I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry okay i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm

sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry everybody here's one photo i mean if he was if he was a serial abuser you would imagine yeah and it would be like much worse you know like i don't know compared to the way she described it that's it he has a lot of evidence on the other side now let's look at the six damning on, go back, just go back to Google. Just go page back, and because remember right above it, we had the,

no, no, just go one more page back, and then damning, scroll down, the six, oh no, go back up, all the way to the top, evidence of Amber Heard abuse. Yeah, now click on that, because we pulled that up.

No, no, no. Click on the showing results for. This right here? No, no, no. The showing results for it right there. Click on the purple. Yeah, click on that. And then where was the

six most damning things the other way? Yeah. Let's see if that works. The sixth most explosive piece of evidence against Johnny Depp. That's what we just did. Yeah. Amber Heard confronted with evidence showing no abuse.

There's a lot of fucking evidence if we can't find it. I don't know. This is Benghazi. Evidence against... Herd. Yeah, we got to be equal now. We got to see this. Oh, we can't find it.

We had it up before. It was like right under the other one. The six most damning pieces of evidence. Maybe put that in. The six most damning pieces of evidence against Heard. Six most damning evidence against Heard. Yeah, let's see if that brings it up. Google take care of your problem they fix it uh wait if you spell correct it sometimes it brings it up did you mean shit oh yeah amber Oh, yeah. Amber.

Yeah. We got it. We got it. Let's see what they say the other way. Okie dokie. One, audio of her admitting to hitting Depp. That's direct evidence. I was hitting you.

I was not punching you. Don't tell me what it feels like to be punched. Though she maintains that she didn't punch or fucking deck him. The audio clip can be heard in the video. Yeah, okay. I don't know. She says, I don't know what the motion of my actual hand was, but you're fine. I did not hurt you. I did not punch you.

I was hitting you. Grow the fuck up, Johnny. I did start a physical fight I mean how has he not won already taunting Depp tell the world Johnny tell them Johnny Depp I Johnny Depp a man I'm a victim of domestic abuse

and he said yes I am she didn't dispute it so pictures of scratched face Mr. Hurd came at me with her nails. Showed pictures of his face were being shown. Deb claimed that the images were taken 10 days before Christmas. Take a peek. Yeah, I mean, those are similar.

Like, yeah. It looks just like hers. It just looks like hers. All right. Fecal matter in the bed. Yeah, that's a tough one. What does she claim about that? She probably just says it wasn't me right it was the dog yeah oh she said it was the dog i don't know he's driving her to go wait we go back up reference the feces as a surprise left his bed that was a horrible practical

joke gone wrong ah yeah i think she did it she was mad when she left because he was she was mad because i that would before she went to coachella her 30th. She was mad when she left because she was mad because before she left to Coachella, her 30th birthday, he was late, and she admitted she was mad about that. So she's shit in his bed. She's fucking psychotic. Makeup of the cream. Oh, yeah, that makeup shit. She put makeup, but that makeup wasn't invented yet.

Bloody finger. The graphic image of, yeah, the severed finger. Ooh, that's gross. Yeah, several people testified to describe the scene after the fight had finished while Burger King. Wait, it happened in Burger King? Oh, Ben King. Okay, Johnny Depp said, yeah, so that's the bottle thing.

So he has a physical thing. He's claiming it was from that. At least there Depp said, yeah. So that's the bottle thing. So he has a physical thing. He's claiming it was from that. There's at least there's evidence there. Right. And that's it. Right. So I get it probably comes down to those six major things. So are you team Depp, team Heard, team Ukraine or team Putin? And we're out of here. We'll see you next time.